#said i wasn’t gonna curse myself for feeling bad then immediately did
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i have GOT to stop cursing myself for my mental health not being good, or for having literal human emotions, (as if i didn’t suffer a manic episode literally two months ago and i’m still recovering and healing from it)
#okay but literally why was february the longest month of my life and march was five seconds long?#and now april is going fast too#my dad has being going on about our holiday for like months and now it’s less than two weeks away#i’m anxious about it tbh#it’s my first big trip in like almost five years#and like i wanna go i wanna live my life#bc i know if i stay home i’ll regret it#but every time i think about going i feel a little nervous#for reasons that i don’t even really know#residual manic depression feels and the internalised ableism that *reallly* got bad during said episode is making me feel sick with nerves#a lot lately and i don’t know i want freedom and independence and a life and i’m trying so hard and ehhhhh#idk i repeat the same shit a lot but it’s a big problem but it’s not something i can change but that doesn’t mean i just stop feeling bad#about it#‘healing isn’t linear’ yeah fuckin tell me about it#idk if i dip in and out that’s why#not that most people would really notice or care#but if you’re interested yeah wow gwen’s off on a weird one again! big surprise!#i take the piss to cope but anywaysssss#just feel like a clown lately like ‘honk honk’ that’s me#said i wasn’t gonna curse myself for feeling bad then immediately did#i’m trying to unlearn that amongst many other things sighsssssssssss#anyways whatever
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Sneaking a Chance
Planet!drummer reader
Part 1 - Of Back to You Summary: An old friend calls you again. You're not sure what to make of it
SEND IN HEADCANNONS OR THINGS Y'ALL WANNA SEE IN THESE FICS. IT'S THE ENTIRE POINT OF THESEEE
A/N- Part one 'cuz I couldn't help myself. I do not own any of the characters except reader and her parents. These are fake scenarios and certain things will be tweaked a little to fit the story line.
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Waking up in the middle of the night was common for you.
However, waking up in the middle of the night because your ex - best friend - who was also your next door neighbor and soon to be celebrity - was calling you after almost a year of barely even texting, was not common.
You sat up straight in bed, answering the phone immediately so as to not wake up your parents.
“Zayn?”
“Were you asleep?” he asked, the smirk evident in his voice.
“It’s 1 am Zayn! What do you think, genius?” you hissed, confused and angry that he was calling you now.
“You answered though!”
“Fine then,” you replied, getting angrier by the second, about to disconnect when you heard him apologize repeatedly.
You sighed, putting the phone back to your ear, “What do you want Zayn?”
“Look, our drummer is terribly sick.”
“So?” you asked, furrowing your eyebrows. Why did that matter?
“And you can play the drums really well.”
You froze.
He was not-
“We have a week left for our first show. You think you could come over to go through it with us once?”
“Zayn, you’ve officially lost your mind!”
“If anyone can do it, it’s you! Look, just try out and if it doesn’t work you go straight back and none of this ever happened. We’ve worked really hard and we don’t want to postpone this. It’s just until our drummer’s back. I promise.”
You sighed again weighing your options. What was the worst that could happen? You could try out right? It wasn’t like you’d be accepted. And even if you were, you’d come back soon. There was only one problem.
“But my parents-”
“You have 10 minutes to get ready, we’re outside your house in a van right now. Sneak out the window like you used to. We’ll drop you back before 7.”
You cursed under your breath, a smirk making its way to your face.
Zayn had always been the one to help you escape your house when you needed to, and plans like these made it feel like old times.
“Alright. I’m in.”
You hung up, quickly jumping out of bed to change into jeans and a top.
As you got ready you couldn’t help the giddy feeling of seeing Zayn again that rose in your chest. You’d barely spoken to him or texted him since he’d joined the band. You knew that he was going places in life that you could never follow, but it still hurt because you two had been inseparable before.
You tied your hair up in a pony, when a sudden thought hit you.
You weren’t just gonna meet Zayn.
You were gonna meet Liam, Louis, Niall and Harry too.
You froze, staring at yourself in the mirror.
“Holy shit,” you muttered, grabbing a few essentials and putting on your drumming gloves.
You opened the blinds to find Zayn standing a bit away from your window, grinning when your face appeared behind it.
You smirked, heart leaping with joy as you slid the window open, crawling out and shutting it again.
Zayn closed the gap between you both, engulfing you in a big hug, your hands around his neck as you laughed.
“I missed you,” he said, pulling away.
“Awww the Bradford bad boy has feelings!” you gasped, causing him to punch your arm playfully.
“Oh shut up!” he laughed.
You wanted to ask why he stopped replying to your texts. If he’d really missed you, why did he ignore them all?
But you shoved the thought away trying to focus on the fact that he hadn’t forgotten you atleast.
He grabbed your arm as you both ran to the van, him shoving you inside causing you to collide with someone as jumped in after you.
“Shit sorry!” you hissed, as someone turned on a flashlight, revealing a curly haired boy next to you.
Harry.
“ ‘s fine love. We should be the ones apologizing for waking you up like this,” he grinned, adjusting himself so that you could sit properly.
You shook your head laughing, hoping the darkness would hide your pink cheeks, no one had ever called you that before, “Trust me, when you’ve been best friends with Malik for 6 years, you get used to things like this.”
The three boys in front of you grinned. “Getting up in the middle of the night to go play some songs for a band that’s just about to go on their first tour is common for you?” the boy you knew as Louis chided. “Damn mate, how many bands have you been in?” he asked, turning to Zayn with a big smirk on his face.
You found yourself laughing with the other boys as Zayn wrapped his hand around your shoulders. You found yourself leaning in to him, the familiarness of being so close to him making the terrible last few months seem a little better.
Though you couldn’t help but wonder what would happen if you got selected. Or what if you didn’t? Would you lose Zayn again?
“Awww look at you both!” Louis laughed again, causing you to bury your face in his shoulder, trying to hide the shy grin on your face.
“Shut up Louis!” Zayn laughed.
You only snuggled closer hoping you would drown everything else out and it would be just you and him, driving out to an all night cafe. Just the two of you.
But when the boys continued laughing and joking you were brought back to reality.
It was never gonna be just the two of you again. Because he was a singer now. And you were just someone from his past. That was never gonna change.
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Tags: @jadonswhore @dollbabydeliicacies @st-ev-ie
#x reader#fluff#x you#angst#x you fluff#one direction#one direction x reader#zayn malik#zayn malik x reader#zayn 1d#louis tomlinson#liam payne#niall horan#harry styles x reader#harry styles#one direction x y/n#x you angst
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I Can't Lose You
PART THREE
Pairing: Aaron Hotchner x reader
Summary: The BAU team is hunting a sadistic murderer and you go undercover to reveal his identity and catch him in the act. Things don’t go according to plan and so much is revealed about you, your team, and your boss…things that will change all of your lives forever.
Warnings: Flashbacks of rape and torture. Mentions of death. Cursing. Lots of angst. Sweet fluffy fluff.
A/N: Series should be read in order or it won't make sense. This part also jumps between different characters' POVs.
Part One, Part Two, Part Four
~Hotch’s POV~
She looked so small, so broken. Just looking at her was enough to break my heart, but hearing the way she said ‘I love you’ like she was saying goodbye felt like a knife in my heart.
She was looking at me like she was trying to memorize my face…like she was convinced she was never going to see it again. Then suddenly, she closed her eyes.
“Baby, stay with me,” I pleaded.
I squeezed her hand, but she didn’t squeeze it back.
“Baby, please…”
Tears streamed down my face and my heart pounded in my chest. Then I heard the loud beep that indicated her heart had stopped beating. The medic pushed me out of the way and immediately began CPR.
“Punch it or we’re gonna lose her!” he yelled to the driver. We were already racing down the highway, but I felt the vehicle pick up speed.
My hands were shaking and I was terrified by what was happening. I silently began to pray, begging God not to take her from me.
The medic continued to give her CPR, but she still wasn’t responsive. Then I heard the beeping begin again as her heart found a rhythm. I took a deep breath and tried to calm myself.
Moments later, we pulled into the ER parking lot. Within seconds, they unloaded the gurney and raced into the hospital, with me right behind them. A nurse stepped out in front of me and calmly told me I needed to wait in the waiting room…that I couldn’t go with her. I wanted to fight her, but I knew it would be fruitless. I backed off and she guided me to a seat and told me to wait.
I looked down at my white shirt, now stained with Isabelle’s blood, and I felt the tears begin anew. I’d always been told that tears were a sign of weakness…and I must never show weakness. I did my best to bottle up my emotion, to not show any pain on my face. I donned the mask I wore every day to hide the agony I felt inside. The fear of losing her gripped my heart in a vise and I struggled to keep the emotion off my face.
I took a deep breath to calm myself and moments later, my team came rushing into the ER. They saw me and made a bee-line for me. As much as I loved them, the last thing I wanted to do right now was talk. Especially about Isabelle.
Morgan reached me first. “How is she?”
“She’s in surgery.” I didn’t add that we almost lost her in the ambulance.
“How bad is it?” Reid asked quietly.
I looked at him and shook my head. He looked terrified and I instinctively wanted to lie to him, to protect him, but I knew I couldn’t do that. “It’s bad,” I said softly. “She’s very weak and she’s lost a lot of blood.”
Reid turned even more pale and Emily put a hand on his arm. “Reid, maybe you should sit down,” she said gently. He complied and Emily and JJ sat beside him.
Morgan walked away to call Garcia and Rossi sat down beside me. “How are you doing?” he asked.
“I’m fine,” I lied, knowing he wouldn’t believe me.
“Come on, Aaron. Talk to me. I know you’re not okay.”
Part of me wanted to tell him everything I was feeling; just get it all out on the table. But the other part of me was too scared of what could happen if I shared all of that. If I talked about it, if I said it out loud, then it became real…and I wasn’t sure I could handle that right now.
“You’ve been through a lot these past couple years,” Rossi said. “And we’ve been with you through all of it, especially Isabelle. So don’t think for one second that we’re not going to be here when you need us the most.”
All I could do was nod. It was taking all of my self-control not to break down. I was surprised to find myself saying, “You never think this sort of thing will ever happen to you…and you never dream it could happen twice.”
Rossi’s expression was a mix of pity, sympathy, and sorrow. “I’m so sorry, Aaron. You deserve better than this.”
“Thanks,” I said quietly. “But it seems the universe has other plans.”
“Don’t give up hope just yet. Isabelle’s a fighter…just have a little faith.”
“I can’t lose her,” I whispered.
Rossi put his hand on my shoulder. “I know,” he said gently. “I know.”
The hours passed by slowly. Everyone talked quietly, moving around occasionally. Garcia arrived a couple hours into the surgery. She had grabbed a seat on the first available flight.
I hadn’t moved in at least 3 hours. I couldn’t. I knew they were all wondering what was going on with me. I could tell they were dying to ask questions, but they were all too focused on Isabelle to bother asking me.
At some point, a nurse came over to tell us Isabelle was still in surgery and I heard Rossi ask questions, but I tuned everything out.
Time blurred by, but still, I didn’t move. Six hours after we walked through the ER doors, a doctor finally came out to talk to us. He looked exhausted and I instantly felt on edge.
“How is she?” Morgan asked.
“Her injuries were quite extensive. It took a while to repair the damage the knife caused in her abdomen and to stop the bleeding. However, she’s currently stable and is resting.”
“She’s going to be okay?” Reid asked hopefully.
“She’s not out of the woods yet, but her chances increase exponentially if she survives the night.”
We all looked at each other in concern. All of us had heard the word ‘if’.
“What are the odds, doc?” Emily finally asked.
“Honestly? I’d say she’s got a 60-40 chance.” He looked at each of us individually. “Are any of you her next of kin?”
“No,” Rossi said. “Her parents are deceased and her sister is out of the country.”
“How about a spouse or significant other?”
Rossi glanced over at me, but I remained silent. She wasn’t my girlfriend and it didn’t feel right to claim her as such without her permission.
“No, she’s single,” Rossi answered. “We’re her family.”
The doctor nodded. “Due to her injuries, she’s slipped into a coma. It’s likely her body is just trying to heal itself.”
At the word ‘coma’, I sunk back down into my chair. I buried my head in my hands and tried not to cry. The doctor was still talking, but I could no longer focus on his words.
“Hotch?” JJ’s voice said a little while later. “The doctor says one of us can sit with her.”
I lifted my head up to find the entire team staring at me.
“It should be you,” Morgan added.
I nodded and got to my feet. With trembling hands, I followed the doctor to Isabelle’s room. He led me in and I saw her laying on the bed, hooked up to various machines, her skin the same color as the sheets except for the dark blue bruising and angry red cuts.
I took a tentative step towards her and the doctor encouraged me. “Talk to her. She may be able to hear you.”
I sat down in the chair beside her bed and took her hand into mine. “Hey Isabelle, it’s Hotch,” I said. “Umm…Aaron.”
I heard the doctor quietly leave and shut the door behind himself.
“I’m so sorry,” I blurted. “I should have never let you go in there. None of this should have happened.” I closed my eyes. “But that’s not what you wanna hear. You don’t wanna hear me blaming myself, because what good will that do?” I paused. “But what else am I supposed to say? I mean, I don’t even know if you can hear me.”
And it’s not like I’m a big talker anyway. What am I supposed to say? Should I tell her how much I love her? How desperate I am for her to open her eyes and look at me? Should I tell her all the things I’ve left unsaid?
I settled on telling her a story instead. “Do you know when it was that I first knew I loved you? It was that case in LA, with the guy who kidnapped and murdered all those kids. We’d finally caught him, but we couldn’t find the kid he’d recently kidnapped. I knew it was likely we were just looking for a body, but he didn’t wanna talk. You insisted on giving it a shot, so I let you. You humanized this man, this monster. You made him feelsomething and he told you where to find the little girl. You were so full of passion…of life. You ran out of that room and I followed you. We found that little girl alive…the look on your face when you reunited her with her parents was an incredible sight. I’d never seen anything so beautiful before. You looked at me and smiled. I could still see that fire in your eyes and that’s when I knew. I’ve tried to hide how I’ve felt for so long, but I can’t do it anymore. All I want to do is be with you.”
Tears streamed down my face and I made the toughest decision of my life. “I want you to come back to me, Izzy. I desperately want you to open your beautiful eyes and look at me…but I can’t ask you to do that. I can’t force you to come back. It’s your choice, Isabelle. You’ve been through so much…and it would just be selfish of me to ask you to stay for me. So if you want to go…I’ll understand.”
I broke down sobbing. I buried my head in her sheets and let it all out. I’d been lucky enough in my life to have loved two incredible women…but I already lost one of them and the thought of losing the other was tearing me apart.
I tried to picture my life without her and I simply couldn’t. She’d been a part of my life for 5 years…she’d helped me through the most difficult time of my life. Isabelle made my life better. I didn’t want to have a life that didn’t include her.
~Morgan’s POV~
“Did any of you know?” I asked.
“Know what?” Emily asked.
“About Hotch and Isabelle?”
“They’re friends,” Rossi said. “Isabelle’s been there for him through all the hell he’s experienced the last couple years.”
“Don’t pretend you don’t see it Rossi,” I said. “He’s clearly in love with her.”
“What?” Garcia exclaimed in surprise. “Hotch? In love with Isabelle? No way.”
“It’s true,” I insisted. “You should have seen the way he reacted when she got taken…and when he saw the video.”
“I can’t believe it,” Garcia said.
“Does it really matter how he feels?” Rossi asked.
“I suppose not,” I said. “I just have to wonder if Isabelle feels the same.”
“She does,” Emily said softly. Everyone looked at her in surprise. “I saw the way she looked at him earlier today. You could see it on her face…and you could see it on his too.”
Rossi sighed. “I saw it too. Not from Izzy, but from Hotch. He told me—back in the van—he told me he loved her. I had no idea until that moment.”
Everyone was silent for a moment. After a while, Reid broke the silence. “What if she doesn’t wake up?”
He sounded so incredibly young and vulnerable. I knew how much he loved Isabelle and I didn’t want him to blame himself for what had happened. “Don’t worry, kid. She’s going to be alright.” Maybe I was reassuring myself more than him.
JJ reached over and squeezed Reid’s hand. “Don’t blame yourself,” she said gently.
“It was my idea.”
“And Isabelle wanted to do it,” Emily said. “It was her decision.”
“No one tells Isabelle what to do, Reid,” Rossi added. “She puts her life on the line for her job every day. The only remarkable thing about today is that she almost lost it.”
It was obvious from Reid’s expression that he was still blaming himself, but he did seem a little less upset.
“Alright, we’re all exhausted,” Rossi said. “Why don’t all of you go back to the hotel and get some sleep? I’ll call you if anything changes.” We all began to protest, but Rossi held up his hand. “You’re no good to anyone if you’re sleep deprived. Now, go.”
There were grumbles all around, but everyone began to get up and prepare to leave.
“Rossi? Do you wanna get some sleep? I’ll stay here,” I said.
Rossi shook his head. “As long as my girl is in that bed, I’ll be staying right here.”
I knew how much Isabelle meant to him, so I understood his desire to stay. “Why’d you let Hotch see her instead of you?”
“He loves her,” he said simply.
“So do you.”
Rossi smiled. “I do indeed, but I would never stand in the way of true love. He’s a good man and Izzy deserves someone who loves her like that.”
I clapped him on the back. “You’re a good man, Rossi.”
Rossi nodded. “I just hope that hearing his voice convinces her to wake up.”
“You and me, both.”
~Your POV~
You woke up in a place you didn’t recognize. The bed was soft and warm, and you had no desire to leave it. You breathed in deeply and the smell of freshly brewed coffee wafted your way.
You smiled to yourself and sat up, instinctively glancing at the other side of the bed, but it was empty. You stretched and slid out of the bed, before making your way slowly to the bedroom door and down the hall. There was something familiar about this place, but you couldn’t quite place it.
You followed the smell of coffee and walked into the kitchen. There was a tall man at the stove with his back to you. He heard you come in and turned around with a smile on his handsome face. “Hey gorgeous. Did you sleep well?”
Your jaw dropped in surprise. “Hotch?”
He looked at you quizzically, then laughed. “I think you may have slept a little too much. You only call me ‘Hotch’ when we’re at work.”
You continued to stare at him for a few moments before shaking your head. “My brain feels a little fuzzy,” you admitted.
He smiled and poured a cup of coffee for you. “Maybe this will help.” He handed you the cup and gave you a warm, sweet kiss.
You smiled at him and took a sip. It tasted just the way you liked it. “Delicious,” you murmured. You sat down at the table and watched him cook. He brought you a plate of your favorite breakfast foods before joining you at the table. “Wow. What’s the occasion?”
He looked surprised. “You really did sleep hard.” He chuckled. “It’s our anniversary.”
You nearly choked on your coffee. “Our what?”
He lifted his left hand and wiggled his fingers at you. You noticed the wedding band on his ring finger and instinctively looked down at your own. There was a large diamond ring and platinum wedding band shinning on yours.
“You didn’t forget, did you?” he asked.
“I…I guess I did—I’m sorry.” You closed your eyes and tried to remember your wedding…nothing. Completely blank. “I don’t really remember anything.”
He looked concerned. “What do you remember?”
You closed your eyes again. “We were working a case down in Atlanta. A Senator was raping and murdering prostitutes.”
The concern on his face intensified. “That was when I first told you I loved you.”
“Yeah, I remember that too…” but you couldn’t remember what happened after that. You could feel something there on the edge of your mind, but you couldn’t grab it.
“Baby, that was four years ago.”
“What?” you gasped.
“We worked that case four years ago.”
You shook your head. “No…no that’s not possible.”
“It’s true,” he insisted.
You closed your eyes and tried to picture what happened next. “What was his name? The Senator?”
“Mark Jacobs.”
You gasped as memories of torture and agony flooded your brain. You dropped to your knees and cried out.
Hotch grabbed your arms. “Isabelle, what’s wrong? Izzy? I’m here. Stay with me.” His voice began to fade. “Stay with me…”
~Hotch’s POV~
Suddenly, Isabelle began to convulse and machines started screaming. I jumped up as nurses raced into the room.
They started yelling orders to each other and only one thought occupied my mind. “Isabelle…I’m right here. Stay with me.” She stopped seizing and the nurses relaxed. “Stay with me,” I whispered.
The machines commenced their normal beeping sounds and the alarms stopped ringing. I sunk back down into my chair and one of the nurses squeezed my shoulder.
“She’s alright, sweetie. It was just a minor seizure. It happens sometimes with trauma patients.”
I stared at Isabelle and nodded.
“Your wife?” she asked kindly.
I looked up at the older woman and shook my head. “We work together.” As if that’s all she was to me…a coworker.
The nurse, ‘Ellie’ according to her nametag, raised her eyebrows. “Never known someone to care enough to sit with their coworker in a hospital overnight.”
I gathered her meaning, but for some reason I just didn’t want to admit the truth. “We’re FBI agents, so we’re really close. Practically family,” I said instead.
She nodded and glanced over at Isabelle with a shake of her head. “The poor girl has been through a lot.” She turned her focus back to me. “Tell me you caught the man who did this.”
“He’s dead,” I said dispassionately.
She nodded again. “Good. Now you just holler if you need anything, alright?”
“Thank you.”
She left and I focused my attention back on Isabelle. I couldn’t help but wonder if she could hear me. Part of me hoped she could and the other part hoped she was blissfully unaware. It would be miserable and terrifying to be aware yet trapped in your body. I shook my head to clear the negative thoughts, but it wasn’t working. I decided to go back out to the waiting room to tell the team to go back to the hotel to rest.
I stopped by the nurse’s station to tell them I’d be right back. When I got out to the waiting room, only Rossi was there.
He saw me and jumped out of his chair. “I sent everyone back to the hotel. They were exhausted.”
“You should get some rest too.”
“Nah, I’d rather be here.”
A couple people were staring at me and I realized I was still wearing my blood stained shirt. “Why don’t you come see her? I’m getting some weird looks out here.”
Rossi nodded. “I’d really like to see her.”
We headed back to her room and Rossi entered first. When he saw her, he brought his hand to his mouth and his eyes filled with tears. “Oh my sweet Isabelle,” he said softly.
“I’ll give you some time alone.” I started towards the door, but Rossi shook his head.
“It’s okay. Stay. It’s what she would want anyway.” Rossi pulled up a chair on the other side of the bed and I sat back down in mine.
We sat in silence for a little while before Rossi said quietly, “The team knows.”
I sighed. “I’m really not surprised. The last 24 hours have been rather telling.”
“Does Isabelle know how you feel?”
Dave was one of the few people I actually felt comfortable discussing this sort of thing with, so I answered him truthfully. “I told her last night at the hotel—or I guess the night before.”
“What made you tell her?”
“I don’t wanna hide how I feel anymore. Isabelle makes life worth living. I don’t care that I’m her boss. I don’t care that I’m not supposed to feel this way. I’m in love with her and it was killing me not to tell her.”
He nodded. “Izzy and I don’t often discuss her love life, but on the few occasions when I’ve asked her if she was seeing someone, she always laughed and brushed me off. She claimed no one really appealed to her, but it was always clear to me she wasn’t being entirely honest.”
I chuckled. “I never would have thought in a million years that someone like her would go for someone like me.”
Rossi raised an eyebrow. “Can I assume the man she’s been in love with these past few years is you?”
I nodded. “How did I get to be so lucky? What makes me so deserving of love, not once, but twice?”
“You’re a good man, Aaron, and you’ve got a good heart. You deserve to be happy.”
I looked at him and gave him a small smile. “I appreciate that, Dave. I’m just not sure the brass will feel the same way.”
“Screw them. Do what makes you happy. Besides, Jack adores Isabelle. You’ve gotta think about him too.”
I smiled. “He really does love her. She’s so good with him. He asks about her all the time. Jessica says he even talks about her when they’re together. He likes to tell her about all the things he does with Isabelle.”
Rossi smiled. “That’s so sweet. Jack’s a good kid.”
“He’s the best. He really could use someone like Isabelle in his life…on a full-time basis.”
Rossi raised his eyebrows. “Full-time, huh?”
I blushed. “I haven’t exactly had time to mention that to Izzy, but I’m hoping she’ll be open to the idea.”
“You’ll have plenty of time to discuss it when she wakes up.”
I grabbed Isabelle’s hand and gave it a squeeze. “I told her she didn’t have to.”
Rossi looked confused. “Didn’t have to what?”
“Wake up.”
The confusion changed to surprise.
“I didn’t want her to feel burdened by what I want. I want her to make the decision for herself. I know it sounds crazy, but in case she can hear me, I just wanted her to know that if she can’t fight anymore, then it’s okay to let go.”
Rossi stared at me in silence for a few seconds. “You really are a good man, Aaron Hotchner. Izzy deserves someone like you.”
“That means a lot to me.” And I genuinely meant that. Rossi viewed Isabelle as his daughter…it’s almost like having a stamp of approval from her father.
We lapsed into a comfortable silence and I felt myself start to drift off. Within minutes, I was sound asleep upright in my chair, the beeping of the machines a soft lullaby in the background.
**********The Next Morning
I woke up in a strange place, groggy, and disoriented. I could smell disinfectant, which only served to enhance my confusion. Then I heard the beeping of the monitors and it all came rushing back. I opened my eyes fully to see Isabelle still lying motionless on the bed. Rossi’s jacket was sitting on the back of the chair he was using, but he wasn’t there.
“Oh dear. Did I wake you?”
I turned to see who was speaking. It was Ellie, the nurse from the night before. “No, I didn’t even hear you come in.” I yawned.
“I just wanted to check on her before I head home.” She bustled over to the bed and started running various checks.
“How’s she doing?” I asked tentatively.
Ellie smiled. “She made it through the night, which is a good thing. She’s quite a fighter. Her vitals look good and she appears to be stable.” She patted my shoulder. “Don’t worry, deary. I think she’s going to be just fine.”
I thanked her and she left, heading home after a long night.
Moments later, Rossi came in carrying two cups of coffee. “Morning sunshine,” he said as he handed me a cup.
“Oh thank god,” I mumbled, taking a sip. If anything could make me feel alive, it was coffee.
“How you holding up?” he asked as he sat down across from me.
“I’m alright. The nurse said she looks good.”
Rossi smiled. “Isabelle’s not one to give up.”
“You don’t have to tell me that.”
Seconds later, my phone rang. I audibly sighed. “It’s Strauss.”
“I’d recommend answering that if I were you.”
I sighed again and answered the phone. “Hotchner.”
“How’s Isabelle holding up?” she asked without preamble.
“She’s in a coma. She experienced quite a lot of trauma.”
“That’s quite unfortunate,” she paused. “I’m sorry to do this, but I need your team back here immediately. There’s an urgent case we need you on.”
I turned pale and felt anger bubbling up. “Couldn’t you have another team do it?”
“I’m sorry, Aaron, but your team is the best. And you’ve been requested personally.”
“I can’t leave Isabelle,” I said.
“You don’t have a choice, Agent Hotchner.”
“Look, Chief Strauss. I understand what you’re saying, but I will not leave one of my agents all alone in a hospital in a strange city. I’ll send the rest of the team. They can handle the case without me.”
I could hear the annoyance in her voice as she begrudgingly agreed. “I expect them back in DC by tonight.”
“Yes, ma’am,” I said as I hung up.
Rossi eyed me quizzically.
“We’ve got a case. The team has to go.”
“You’re staying with Isabelle?”
I nodded.
“Good.” Rossi sighed. “When do we leave?”
“As soon as possible.”
“I’ll go to the hotel and get everyone. I’m sure they’ll want to see Isabelle before we go.”
He left and I sat down again to await the team’s arrival. It wasn’t long before I heard them coming down the hall. They all filed into the room and fell quiet when they saw Isabelle.
Garcia was the first to recover. She went to the bed and grabbed Isabelle’s hand. Tears streamed down her face. “I don’t wanna leave her.”
Morgan stood behind her and put his arm around her. “None of us do.”
The rest of the team gathered around her bed, except for Reid.
“Reid?” I said gently.
He couldn’t even look at her and his hands were shaking. “I can’t…” he whispered.
I looked at JJ and nodded toward Reid. She moved over to him and took him by the arm. “It’s okay, Spence. You don’t have to stay in here.” She led him outside and came back in a few minutes later. “He’s still blaming himself.”
I shook my head. “It’s no more his fault than it is mine.”
“You know how he gets. He won’t listen,” she said sadly.
“I know.”
Everyone spent some time talking to Isabelle and slowly preparing to leave. About an hour later, I escorted the team out front to say goodbye. None of them wanted to leave, but I had to put my foot down.
“I’ll call you if anything changes, guys. So please, don’t worry.”
We said our goodbyes and I watched them drive away. I couldn’t help but wonder how long I could get away with staying here before Strauss fired me or sent someone to drag me back to DC.
********** 2 weeks later
I rolled out of bed at 7:15am. I checked my phone and saw that I had three messages from Strauss. I groaned and pushed the play button for the first message. I heard Strauss’ agitated voice demanding that I return to DC immediately. I deleted the message without listening to the whole thing and pressed play on the next one. It was more of the same, but she was definitely pissed this time. I deleted that message as well, then listened to the final one.
“If you’re not on the next plane to DC, Agent Hotchner, I promise you’ll be working the night shift in some remote hell hole for the rest of your career,” she said before hanging up with a slam.
“Shit,” I mumbled. I’d been avoiding her calls for the last few days. I knew I couldn’t hold out forever, but I was still hoping Isabelle would wake up before I was forced to go back. It’d been the longest two weeks of my life…I was desperate to go home and see my son, but I was also terrified to leave Isabelle.
I also didn’t want to lose my job, which meant I needed to call Strauss whether I wanted to or not. I dialed her number and waited for her to pick up.
“Chief Strauss.”
“It’s Aaron Hotchner—”
“Where the hell have you been? Have you been ignoring my calls?”
“I’m sorry, ma’am. I’m still in Georgia. Agent Heywood is still in a coma.”
That seemed to calm her down a bit. “I’m sorry about that, I truly am, but we need you back here. You have a unit to run.”
I sighed. “I know. And trust me, I want to come home, but I’m having a hard time leaving her.”
Strauss was silent for a moment. “Why?”
I was now faced with a choice. I could either lie to my boss or I could tell her the truth…either way, I would be facing serious consequences.
I took a deep breath and took the plunge. “Do you want me to be honest?” I asked.
“Of course.”
“Even if it’s not what you want to hear?”
She paused. “Tell me what’s going on, Aaron.”
“I…umm…I’m in love with her,” I blurted.
“Oh…” the silence drags on. I could tell she was trying to figure out what to say. A solid minute passed before she spoke again. “Does she know?”
“Yes.”
“How long has this been going on?”
“Nothing’s actually going on, but I’ve felt this way for a while.”
She sighed. “Aaron, you know the rules.”
“I’m well aware of the rules, Erin, which is why I didn’t act on my feelings. But coming this close to losing her really put things in perspective.” I thought about Haley and I’m sure she was too.
“I shouldn’t even be entertaining this, but how does Isabelle feel?”
I blinked back tears as I recalled the look on her face when she told me she loved me. “Isabelle’s last words to me were, ‘I love you’.”
There was a long pause before Strauss responded. “If it came down to it, would you step down to be with her?”
“Yes,” I said without hesitation. “I would do anything.”
“Then I’ll do what I can here.”
I breathed a sigh of relief. “Thank you.”
“Don’t thank me just yet. Aaron, I need you to think about this very carefully…what are you going to do if she doesn’t wake up?”
I closed my eyes. “I can’t even think about that. I—I don’t think I can live without her.”
She let out a long exhale. “Alright, I’ll deal with the higher ups. You focus on waking Isabelle up.”
“I will,” I said before we hung up.
~Your POV~
The lights were too damn bright…you could hardly see. You squeezed your eyes shut again and let out a soft moan. You desperately tried to remember where you were, but nothing was familiar to you. The sheets were rough, it smelled funny, and you were pretty sure you could hear beeping.
You tried to shift your body, but sharp stabbing pains shot up your limbs. You tried opening your eyes again, much more slowly, giving them time to adjust to the light. Once they did, you looked around the room. “What the…is this a hospital?” you thought to yourself.
You tried to sit up again, but it was much too painful. You tried to remember how you got there. Was it a car accident? You looked down at your arms, but you couldn’t see the wounds because of the bandages.
You saw a call button attached to the side of the bed and you reached out to push it. Seconds later, an older lady, a nurse you assumed, came running in. “Isabelle!” she yelled in surprise. “You’re awake!”
You tried to speak, but your throat was too dry. The nurse seemed to know this and she hurried to get you some water, which you chugged down gratefully.
“Where am I?” you asked. Your voice sounded raspy even to your own ears.
“You’re at Truman Memorial Hospital.”
“How did I get here?”
“Do you remember anything?” she asked instead of answering your question.
“No…” you closed your eyes and forced yourself to think. “My team…we were working a case…Hotch…Hotch!” your eyes sprung open. “Where’s Hotch?”
The nurse shook her head. “Who’s Hotch, honey?”
“Aaron Hotchner. He’s an agent. He was with me in the ambulance…but I don’t remember how I got in the ambulance…”
“Oh! Aaron! Let me call him, deary. I’ll be right back.” She hurried out of the room.
You stared at the ceiling and desperately tried to remember what happened. You could feel something pricking at the back of your mind, but you couldn’t quite put your finger on it.
A few moments later, the nurse came back in. “Oh, he’s going to be so excited to see that you’re awake! He’s spent nearly every waking moment with you for the past two weeks.”
You nearly choked on your own saliva. “Two weeks?”
The nurse blushed. “Oh, yes. You’ve been in a coma for the last two weeks.”
You rubbed your temples. “My god, what the hell happened to me?”
“I think I’ll let Aaron tell you that,” she said gently.
I was about to pressure her for answers when I heard loud footsteps running down the hall. To my surprise and happiness, the man ran right into my room…it was Hotch. His eyes were wide with worry and I could see the pure emotion on his handsome face.
“Isabelle…” he breathed. He was looking at you like he didn’t believe you were real.
“Hey,” you said softly as you reached out for him, beckoning him towards you.
You saw the nurse quietly back out of the room, shutting the door behind her.
You smiled at him and he tentatively touched your hand, as though he was afraid you’d disappear. “You’re awake,” he whispered.
You nodded and reached up to touch his face. The moment your skin touched his, he lit up. You could feel the joy radiating from him. In an instant, he leaned down to kiss you sweetly. You breathed in his scent and deepened the kiss. You could feel how badly he needed you and it made your heart flutter.
“Aaron,” you whimpered.
He affectionately caressed your face and smiled at you again. “You had me worried,” he murmured.
“I’m sorry,” you said earnestly. “Honestly, I don’t even remember how I got here—or why I’m here for that matter.”
He froze and looked at you in surprise. “You don’t remember anything?”
You shook your head.
“What’s the last thing you remember?”
“You telling me that you loved me.”
His eyes widened. “Nothing after that?”
“An ambulance ride, vaguely. But nothing else.”
“You don’t remember Reid knocking on your door at the crack of dawn?”
You thought for a moment, then shook your head. “All I know is that something bad happened and I ended up in a coma for two weeks.”
He nodded. “Maybe it’s better that way.”
You looked surprised. “No, Aaron. The not-knowing is terrifying. I need to know what happened.”
“I don’t want you to relive it.”
“I have to know.”
He stared at the sheets and didn’t respond.
“Give me a cognitive interview,” you pleaded.
His head jerked up and his eyes filled with emotion. “Absolutely not.”
“You know I can do it myself. It’ll just be easier to have you with me…to walk me through it.”
“Iz…”
“Aaron, please.”
He sighed. “If at any point in time you feel like it’s too much, we’re stopping, okay?”
You nodded and closed your eyes.
“Think back to that night. You’re comfortable in bed and you hear knocking on the door.”
“I’m annoyed because it’s so early…it’s Spence.”
“What does he tell you?”
“He’s got a plan…I have to go undercover…then we tell you about it,” you grimaced. “You don’t like the plan.”
“No,” he said softly. “I did not.”
“But we do it anyway, because it’s the only way to catch the unsub.” You started to breathe heavily. Hotch leaned forward, watching you closely, concern apparent on his brow. “Senator Jacobs…he’s the unsub.” You rubbed your temple. “He…he took me. He…” Tears began to stream down your face as the memories of that night came flooding back. You remembered it all…the rape, the torture, every moment of it.
You let out a sob and Hotch wrapped his arms around you. “Stop, Izzy. You can stop.”
You shook your head. You needed to know how this story ended. You remembered the team breaking in, you remembered Hotch begging you to stay with him, and you remembered hearing his voice, but not being able to respond. He was telling you about the moment he realized he loved you. You couldn’t see him, but you could distinctly hear his voice. You also heard him tell you that he understood if you had to go. You could feel his pain and his love as if it were your own.
Your eyes fluttered open and you looked up at him. “Oh, Aaron…”
He brushed your hair back and looked at you lovingly.
“I heard you,” you said softly.
He furrowed his brow. “What do you mean?”
“When I was in the coma…I heard you tell me that I didn’t have to stay—that you would understand if I couldn’t.”
Tears welled up in his eyes. “You heard me?”
You nodded. “You told me about the first time you realized you loved me…that kidnapping case we had in LA.”
He wrapped you in his arms and buried his face in your hair. “I can’t believe you heard that,” he whispered.
“You were there for me the whole time.”
He pulled back to look at you. “How could I leave you?”
You smiled through the tears. “I love you, Aaron Hotchner.”
“I love you, Isabelle Heywood.”
He kissed you and you found it hard to breathe. When the kiss ended, a horrible thought popped into your brain. “How much did you see?” you asked softly without looking at him.
He doesn’t need you to clarify your question, but it was clear he didn’t exactly want to answer. After a few moments of silence, he said, “I saw everything from the moment he turned that camera on to the moment it stopped.”
Tears poured down your face and you fiddled with the blanket. “Everything?”
“You were in agony…you were being tortured and it was my fault. It felt like just punishment.”
Your head snapped up and you fixed him with a stern expression. “None of what happened was your fault, do you understand me? None of it.”
He was quite clearly taken aback by the intensity of your statement. “I can’t help but blame myself.”
“Well stop it, because none of you were to blame. It was all Jacobs.” You gasped loudly. “Oh my God, and Brady!”
“Brady?”
“Detective Brady! He was there! He’s the reason Jacobs knew I was FBI. Did you get him at the warehouse?”
Hotch looked extremely pale, but you could see the cold fury in his eyes. “That son of a bitch…he wasn’t there when we found you, Izzy.”
“He probably knows I was in a coma…and since Jacobs is dead, no one else knows he’s in on it. He’s probably still at the station, biding his time.”
Hotch looked furious, hands balled into fists at his sides. He pulled out his cell phone and dialed a number. “Captain Harris, this is Agent Hotchner.” Pause. “She’s doing well, thank you.” Another pause. “Is Detective Brady in today?”… “I’d like to meet with him.”… “No, no. It’s better if you don’t tell him I’m coming. In fact, don’t tell him you spoke to me at all.”… “Will do. Thank you Captain.”
He hung up and looked at you apologetically. “I have to go…the rest of the team is back in DC.”
“No, Aaron.” You tried to sit up, wincing in pain. “It’s not safe for you to go by yourself.”
“You’re probably right, but there’s not exactly another option.”
“Why don’t you call the Atlanta field office and see if you can get an agent to go with you?”
“That would take too long. If he finds out you’re awake, he’s going to make a run for it…or worse.” The look on his face told you he was picturing the ‘or worse’ very vividly in his mind.
“Hey. You don’t get to go running into danger without backup just because you’re worried about me. That’s not how this works.”
His expression softened. “I can’t just sit here and do nothing. Not when he’s out there and you’re lying in that bed.”
“Well, I’d get up if I could,” you said softly.
He winced as he came over and grabbed your hand. “That’s not what I meant. I just can’t help but worry about you, Izzy.”
“I know.” You yawned. “Just promise me you won’t do anything stupid.”
He nodded. “I promise.”
You yawned again and he smiled. “I think you need to rest. Your body has a lot of healing to do.”
“I was asleep for two weeks.”
“That was just to catch up on all the sleep you missed because of work,” he joked.
You laughed and rolled your eyes. “It’s because my boss overworks me.”
He chuckled. “He must be an ass.”
You grinned. “I don’t know about that, but he does have a nice ass,” you teased.
He blushed, which only made you grin even more. Then the two of you burst into laughter before you yawned again.
“Maybe you were right about that rest thing. Do you mind?”
“Of course not.” He kissed your forehead. “Get some sleep. I’m going to see if I can get an agent from the field office to come down here.”
“Good. Be safe.”
“Always.”
You closed your eyes and quickly drifted off to sleep.
~Hotch’s POV~
I’d made a promise, but I knew I had to break it in order for her to be safe. Isabelle was all that mattered.
I felt a twinge of guilt as I made my way to my Suburban, but I brushed it off. I got in and made my way to the police station. I knew I should have at least called Rossi and told him what I was planning, but I didn’t want to give him the opportunity to talk me out of it.
I pulled into the parking lot and headed inside, eyes peeled for any sign of Brady. I saw him standing on the other side of the bullpen with his back to me. I started walking toward him when another officer noticed me. “Agent Hotchner?” he called out. “What are you doing back here?”
Brady turned around and saw me. His eyes widened and the color drained from his face as he turned to run out the back door.
I wasted no time in rushing after him. “Brady stop!” I yelled, drawing my gun as I chased him out the door.
A shot rang out and I felt the sting of a bullet graze my arm. I pulled back into the doorway, peering out slightly to see Brady running toward the parking lot next door. I dashed after him, ignoring the pain in my arm.
I heard the sound of running feet behind me and I turned to see Captain Harris running toward me. I kept running and just prayed he was on my side…otherwise, I knew this would end badly for me.
A few yards ahead of me, Brady had started to slow down. I thanked God I was in excellent shape as I began to close the distance between us. Moments later, I sprung forward, tackling Brady to the ground. His gun flew out of his hand and he groaned in pain.
“Detective Brady, you’re under arrest for conspiracy to commit murder and obstruction of justice,” I said as I put handcuffs on him.
Captain Harris came up behind me just as I started to pull Brady off the ground. “Agent Hotchner, what’s this all about?” he demanded.
“Brady here has been working with Senator Jacobs. Not only is he your leak, but he’s also the reason my agent is in the hospital.”
Harris paled. “Are you sure? How do you know?”
“Because Isabelle is awake.” I saw Brady’s eyes widen. “She told me herself.”
Harris closed his eyes briefly, before letting out a string of curse words. “You son of a bitch!” he yelled at Brady. “You betrayed your oath, you harmed innocent people, and you almost got a federal agent killed. What do you have to say for yourself?”
“I want a lawyer,” Brady said stubbornly.
I sighed. “Yeah, I bet you do.”
The three of us made our way back inside the station. All eyes were on us as I marched Brady straight through the bullpen, into the parking lot, and into the back of my SUV.
Captain Harris and I bid farewell and I immediately called the Atlanta field office. I made arrangements for a couple agents to come down and get him for extended questioning. Until they arrived, however, I wasn’t letting him out of my sight.
I drove back to the hospital and dragged Brady in with me. I was halfway to Isabelle’s room when a wave of pain hit me and I remembered my arm. The adrenaline had finally worn off and it was beginning to throb. I turned back around, heading to the nurse’s station with Brady in tow.
“How can I help you?” a nurse asked me.
“I got shot in the arm and I just need a quick patch up.”
The nurse paled and her eyebrows shot up. She eyed me warily, her gaze shooting over to Brady and back to me like she was trying to figure out what was happening.
I pulled my creds out, showing them to her, and her expression immediately changed. She led me to a small room and gestured for me to have a seat. I put Brady in the corner farthest from the door and took off my suit jacket.
“Shirt too,” she insisted sternly.
I gingerly removed my shirt and she stepped closer to get a good look at the wound. “It’s pretty shallow, so you’re lucky.”
I nodded and she set to work cleaning me up, stitching the wound, and bandaging it. Ten minutes later, she patted my shoulder gently. “You’re done.”
“Thank you,” I said as I got up and started to pull my shirt back on.
“Don’t you be putting that bloody shirt back on,” she snapped.
“I can’t just wear my under shirt,” I complained.
“Well you’re gonna have to.” She took my shirt right out of my hands and tossed it into the medical waste bin. “You’ll live,” she insisted as she walked out the door.
I sighed. “Come on,” I grumbled as I dragged Brady out of the room and towards Isabelle’s room.
I expected her to be asleep, but instead I saw she was on the phone. A nurse gently stopped me from going into the room.
“She said it was a private call and that no one was allowed in the room,” she said softly.
“Oh,” I said in surprise. “I’ll just wait out here then.”
Brady and I took a seat in the chairs just down the hall from Isabelle’s room. I couldn’t help but wonder who she was talking to and what was so private that she didn’t even want me to know.
~Your POV—10 minutes prior~
There was a knock on the door and a kind-faced nurse entered. “Isabelle? There’s a phone call for you.”
You furrowed your brow. “For me? But no one even knows I’m awake.”
“Actually, we received a request from your boss that she be notified immediately if you woke up. I’m assuming this is just her returning the call.”
‘She?’ you thought to yourself. Confusion lit your features, but it quickly dawned on you, ‘Strauss’. Out loud you said, “Could I take it in here, given that I can’t really move?”
The nurse laughed lightly. “Of course, dear. I’ll transfer it.” She turned to go.
“Wait.” She looked back at you. “Please make sure no one bothers me until I’m done. Even Aaron.”
She nodded. “Absolutely.”
Thirty seconds later, the bedside phone rang. You took a deep breath before answering the call. “This is Isabelle.”
“Isabelle, it’s Strauss.”
“Hello, ma’am.”
“How are you feeling?”
“Like I got hit by a train…twice,” you said honestly. “But I’ll heal.”
“I’m glad you’re alright.”
“Thank you, ma’am.” There was a pause and you waited for her to speak. When she didn’t, you broke the ice. “While I appreciate you calling to check up on me, I sense there’s something more.”
Strauss sighed. “Unfortunately, yes, there is. It’s about Agent Hotchner.”
You immediately tensed up. “What about him?”
“Well, for starters, he’s refused to come back to DC for the past two weeks. He even stopped taking my phone calls. When he finally answered, he informed me he wouldn’t leave you…do you know why that is?”
You had no idea that Hotch had been disobeying direct orders. That was so unlike him. You had a sinking feeling Strauss knew exactly why Aaron had refused to leave you and it wasn’t his sense of loyalty.
You decided to feign ignorance. “I would assume it was out of a sense of duty. He’d never leave a member of his team behind.”
“No, Isabelle. That’s not why.” You could hear the annoyance in her voice. “He informed me just this morning of his feelings for you.”
You nearly dropped the phone in surprise. “I’m sorry, he did what?”
“He also told me you reciprocate those feelings.”
You closed your eyes and let out a long breath. “And?”
“Is it true?”
You knew it was pointless to lie. “Yes, ma’am. It’s true.”
Strauss sighed dramatically. “He’s your boss, you know.”
You felt annoyance creep into your voice. “I’m well aware of that, ma’am.”
“If he’s taking advantage of you—”
“It’s not like that,” you said quickly, cutting her off. “We’ve never been together. My feelings have nothing to do with him being my boss or pressuring my in any way.”
“Alright,” she said before pausing. “Do you plan on starting a relationship with him?”
You wished you could say it was none of her business, but unfortunately, it was her business. “I would like to,” you said honestly.
She sighed. “I was hoping you wouldn’t say that. I’m sorry to have to do this Isabelle, especially after everything you’ve been through, but you and Aaron Hotchner cannot be together.”
You inhaled sharply, feeling the pressure of tears welling up in your eyes. “What?”
“It’s against policy, Isabelle. I simply can’t allow it.”
You laughed harshly. “Allow it? Who are you to decide who I can love?”
“I’m the one who has the power to ruin your career. I can transfer you to another unit. I can fire Agent Hotchner. I can end both of your careers in an instant, Agent Heywood. That’s who l am.”
Tears streamed down your face and your heart snapped in two. “Why?” you whispered.
“Having a relationship is too distracting. Either of you could get hurt. You’ll be too focused on each other and one of your teammates could be hurt—or worse. And what if you break up? Could you still work together? This is my best team and it’s my job to ensure that everything runs smoothly. I’m not going to risk jeopardizing that just so you can have a boyfriend.”
While her points were valid, she was still wrong. You just had to find the words to say to make her see that. “You’re right, it could be dangerous. We could get distracted. We might fight. We might be angry with each other at times…but he’s not ‘just a boyfriend’. I’m in love with him, Strauss. Love. Those feelings didn’t just develop overnight. I’ve spent the past three years of my life completely head-over-heels for someone I thought I could never have. But I never once acted on those feelings. I never jeopardized anyone’s safety. I never prioritized him over anyone else on the team. That team is my family. I would die for any one of them in a heartbeat. I love them as much as I love Aaron, just in a different way.”
You took a breath before continuing, “And we fight just like any other family, but we forgive each other and we come back stronger because that’s what families do. So if you think for one second that I’m going to put my family at risk just because I want a boyfriend, then you really don’t know me at all. I love Aaron with all of my soul and that kind of love doesn’t break, Chief Strauss. Ever.”
There was a long pause as Strauss took in your words. It was clear she was surprised by what you said. Finally, she spoke, “I didn’t know you felt that way.”
“That was the whole point. When I’m at work, I’m professional.”
“Can you remain that way?”
“Absolutely.”
She took a deep breath. “I am willing to allow this on a trial basis as long as you promise me one thing.”
“Anything,” you said with a hint of desperation.
“Don’t make me regret this decision.”
“I won’t. I promise.”
“Because I will use my earlier threats, Agent Heywood. Do not test me.”
“Yes ma’am. You have my word.”
“Good. Then rest up and get your ass back to DC as soon as possible…and bring Agent Hotchner with you.”
“Yes ma’am. Will do.”
She hung up and you stared at the wall in silence, phone still in your hand. You couldn’t believe what had just happened. Somehow, you’d managed to convince Chief Strauss to let you and Aaron date…it was damn near a miracle and you couldn’t wait to tell him about it.
~Hotch’s POV~
I was starting to get a little antsy, waiting for Isabelle to finish her call. I tried to imagine who she was talking to, but I didn’t want to guess. She’d looked pretty upset earlier…
“Mr. Hotchner?” I looked up and the nurse who had told me to wait earlier was smiling at me. “You can go in now.”
“Thank you,” I said as I stood up. “Come on, Brady.”
The man grumbled, but allowed me to lead him into Isabelle’s room. Her eyes widened in surprise when she saw him, but that surprise quickly faded to concern when she looked at me.
“What happened?” she demanded as she stared at my bandaged arm. “Where are your clothes?”
I told Brady to sit in the corner, then I moved closer to her bed. “It’s just a little scratch, nothing to worry about.”
She quite clearly didn’t believe me and Brady let out a cackle.
“Scratch?” he said sarcastically. “I shot you.”
Isabelle’s eyes widened again. “You did what?”
“He was chasing me. What was I supposed to do?”
Isabelle looked like she was about to tell him exactly what he could do, but I cut her off by lightly touching her arm. “I’m fine, Iz.”
Her eyes darkened. “I told you not to do anything stupid! You were supposed to wait for backup!”
I frowned. “I’m sorry, Izzy, but I couldn’t risk him getting away.”
“He could have killed you,” she hissed.
“But he didn’t.”
She glared at me. “That’s really not the point.”
“Oh would you two please shut up?” Brady interrupted.
We both turned our glares on him and he fell silent.
“Did you really have to bring him here?”
“Well, I couldn’t leave him at the station. I don’t know what they would have done,” I said. “There are a couple agents coming down to get him.”
She nodded, seemingly content with my response.
“Who was that call from?” I asked innocently.
She turned a shade paler and said, “Strauss.”
Now it was my turn to pale. “What did she want?”
“She was just checking in to see how I was doing,” she said lightly. The tension in my body lessened significantly…at least until she added, “Oh and to tell me that you and I can’t be together.”
I felt anger bubble under my skin. “She can’t do that,” I said harshly.
“I heard a similar reaction…but she does have the ability to ruin our careers, Aaron.”
My face hardened and I desperately tried to control my emotions. I knew Isabelle was right, but I didn’t want to lose her. Not after everything we’d been through.
I was about to say as much when she once again continued her thought. “However, I did manage to convince her to let us try it, ‘on a trial basis’. Her words, not mine.”
My jaw dropped. “How the hell did you manage that?” I asked in shock.
She shrugged. “I told her the truth,” she said simply.
I stared at her in silence, hoping she’d continue. I was dying to know exactly what she’d said. It quickly became clear that she wasn’t going to say more, so I said, “We can talk more about this when we’re alone.”
She gave me a small nod. “Have you called the team yet?” she asked softly.
I blushed. “I…well—I sorta forgot…”
“You forgot?” she asked with eyebrows raised.
“I was a little busy,” I said, pointing at Brady.
She rolled her eyes. She didn’t say a word, just picked up her bedside phone and dialed a number she knew by heart. “Hey, Spence,” she said softly when it was answered.
I couldn’t hear his response, but I could imagine he was overjoyed.
She laughed lightly. “I feel fine, Derek, relax. Hey, Em!” she paused. “Yes, I’ll bring Hotch with me.” Pause. “Yeah, Dave. He’s right here.” She looked up at me with a small smile on her face. “He is a good man, I know. I’m very lucky.”
I felt warm inside as I listened to her half of the conversation. I was dying to get home and I was so glad she was coming with me. The conversation continued for a little while and I sat patiently, waiting for the team to stop throwing questions at her.
I knew how much she loved them, and how much they loved her. They were all so worried, but instead of calling them the minute she woke up, I went after Brady. I felt slightly ashamed, but I still think it was the right call.
I glanced over at Brady, taking note of his expression. He was watching Isabelle with a look I knew very well. I’d seen hundreds of male unsubs stare at her with the same kind of hunger that I saw on his face in that moment. The very thought of him touching her made me want to punch him in the face.
Instead, I ignored his expression and focused on Isabelle. Even covered in bruises, healing cuts, and bandages, she was still incredibly beautiful. So much so, it was almost painful to look at her. I loved her more than I ever thought possible…and somehow she’d managed to convince Strauss that we could be together without jeopardizing the team. I couldn’t even begin to imagine what she’d said to her…
My phone started to ring and I glanced at the caller ID, but didn’t recognize the number. “Hotchner.”
“Agent Hotchner, this is Agent Collins. I’m on my way to pick up your suspect. Where should I meet you?”
“I’m at Truman Memorial Hospital.”
“Everything alright?”
“Yeah, I’m fine. So’s he, unfortunately. ETA?”
He chuckled. “About 20 minutes.”
“Perfect. See you then.”
I hung up and looked over at Isabelle who was still on the phone. The team must be in-between cases or she never would have let them talk so long.
My phone rang again.
“Mr. Popular,” Brady muttered.
My trademarked glare silenced him and I looked at the small screen, a number I recognized flashing across it.
“Hotchner.” It was my customary greeting and I wasn’t going to change it, even for her.
“Aaron, it’s Strauss.”
“Ma’am,” I replied.
“Have you spoken to Isabelle?” Straight to the point…not that I was surprised.
“Briefly. She said that she’d gotten your permission to pursue a relationship.”
“Indeed. As long as certain rules are followed and expectations met.”
“Of course. I do have to wonder though, how did she convince you?”
“She’s a very determined woman and she cares very deeply for you and for her team. I have to respect that. As for specifics, well, you’ll just have to ask her.”
“I will,” I said earnestly. Strauss sounded like she really did respect Isabelle…and that was saying something. The two of them often butted heads and there had been quite a few heated arguments broken up by me or Rossi.
“Good. Now, when are the two of you returning?”
“I’ll have to talk to her doctor. We’ll travel as soon as she’s cleared to.”
“Drive if you have to, Aaron. I’d like you back at work and apparently that’s only going to happen if Isabelle is in a hospital close-by.”
“You’re correct. I’ll get us back as soon as possible. You have my word.”
“Good. I’ll update the director on her status. Talk soon.” She hung up without waiting for a reply.
I shook my head. That woman really was a lot to handle.
Isabelle seemed to be finishing up her call with the team. I smiled at her as she told them how much she loved them and promised to be home soon.
“You know she’ll never stay with someone like you,” Brady said softly beside me.
I turned to him in surprise. “Excuse me?”
He nodded towards Isabelle. “She’s not the kind of woman that would settle for the kind of life you would give her. She’s fire…and you’re water.”
“What the hell is that supposed to mean?” I growled angrily.
“It means that eventually she’ll leave you. Maybe not tomorrow, maybe not next year…but she will leave.”
“How would you know what she wants or what she’ll do?”
He smiled mirthlessly. “Because I know women like her…and I know men like you. You’re damaged goods Agent Hotchner, and sooner or later, she’ll tire of trying to fix you.”
His words slammed into me like a baseball bat. It hit me repeatedly as the realization that he could be right dawned on me. My heart clenched and I dared to glance at Isabelle. She was looking at me with concern clear on her pretty features. I doubted she had overheard the exchange, but that didn’t stop her from reading my body language. She was a profiler after all.
She beckoned me to her and I reluctantly got up and went to her side. She took my hand and squeezed it. I squeezed hers back, a little harder than I’d intended to.
“Are you okay?” she asked softly.
I smiled tightly. “Of course.”
“Are you sure? You look a bit…tense.”
I laughed and it sounded fake, even to me. “I’m always tense.”
“No…not with me.” She paused. “You hide your feelings, you pretend to be fine, you act stoic…but that’s with other people. You don’t have to wear your mask with me, Aaron. No matter what you share with me, I’ll always care. I love the man beneath the mask. Nothing will ever change that.”
The fierceness in her voice took me by surprise. Hell, 90% of what she did surprised me. I started to respond, maybe even tell her what Brady had said, but I was interrupted before I could.
“Mr. Hotchner?” A nurse asked from the doorway. “There’s an FBI agent asking for you.”
I sighed quietly. “Tell him I’ll be right out.”
The nursed nodded and hurried off.
I turned to Brady, but Isabelle’s hand on my arm stopped me. I turned to look at her again.
“This conversation is far from over,” she said pointedly.
I simply nodded because I didn’t know what else to do. I didn’t want to show weakness or vulnerability in front of Brady, so I stood up straight and donned my armor once more.
“Come on, Brady. Time to meet your new best friend.”
“Aw, I thought we were best friends!” I could hear the sarcasm in his voice, but I chose to ignore him. Instead, I grabbed his arm and led him out of the room.
A tall man in a navy blue suit walked towards me and introduced himself as Agent Collins. I shook his hand and pointed to my prisoner. “Agent Collins, meet Detective Shawn Brady.”
Agent Collins raised his eyebrows. “Detective?”
“Former detective, now disgraced,” I corrected myself.
Collins nodded. “We don’t take too kindly to anyone coming after one of our own…being in law enforcement makes it so much worse. Hope you’re ready to be locked up for the rest of your life, asshole.”
Brady didn’t say a word, but I could see a twinge of fear behind his defiant stare. It brought me a small amount of pleasure and I handed him over to Agent Collins happily. I waved goodbye as Collins and Brady headed for the exit.
“Good riddance,” I mumbled under my breath.
I turned and walked back to Isabelle’s room. She looked up at me when I entered. “He’s gone?”
I nodded.
“Good.” She patted the bed beside her. “Come sit with me so we can talk. And close the door.”
I did as she asked and sat on the edge of the bed.
“Talk to me, Aaron.”
I ran my fingers through my hair. “About what? I’m fine, Iz.”
“Don’t offend me by lying to me.”
My eyes widened in surprise. The last thing I wanted to do was hurt or upset her. I sighed and took a deep breath. “It’s just…something Brady said got me thinking.”
“Why in the world would you listen to anything that man had to say?”
“Because he was right—at least about this.”
She didn’t look convinced, but she remained silent and waited for me to continue.
“He pointed out how incredibly different you and I are. But that’s not really what got me thinking. He said that I was damaged goods and that you would get tired of trying to fix me. He’s right—I am damaged. And you deserve better—”
“I’m gonna stop you right there,” she said harshly. “Now you listen to me, Aaron Hotchner, and you listen good because I’m only going to say this once. You are not damaged. Life has thrown incredible obstacles your way and you’ve experienced pain and loss than most people would be able to handle, but you’ve overcome it. You don’t let the past define you. You’re the kindest, bravest soul I’ve ever had the pleasure of knowing. You save lives for a living, Aaron. You’ve dedicated your life to helping others, in spite of what’s happened to you. You never give up, ever. You inspire me.” She paused, slightly out of breath. “You wanna know what I told Strauss?”
I nodded, too stunned to speak.
“I told her that I’ve spent the last 3 years of my life completely head-over-heels in love with a man I thought I could never have. I told her I would never do anything to jeopardize the safety of my team—my family. I would die for any one of you without a second thought. Aaron, you’re the greatest thing that has ever happened to me. I love you with all my heart and soul…and that kind of love will never break.” She paused. “That’s what I told Strauss. That’s what changed her mind. So don’t you for one second think that I will ever walk away.”
I sat in silence, trying to wrap my brain around her words. What had I ever done to deserve her—let alone her love?
I must have been quiet for too long because she spoke very softly, “Please say something.”
I looked into her eyes. “Three years?” I asked softly. It was all I could think to say.
She nodded.
“I didn’t know—I never thought—I always assumed you would never love someone like me.”
“How could I not?”
I was certain the surprise showed on my face. “What did I do to deserve you?” I whispered my earlier thought aloud.
Isabelle smiled at me. “It’s not about deserve, Aaron. I met you and I knew immediately that you weren’t like other people. Now here we are, years later, my heart is filled with love for this amazing man. Please don’t make me try to convince you that you’re worth it. You’re the most important thing in my life.”
I smiled warmly and she smiled back. “I love you so much, Isabelle Heywood…I always will.”
“I love you too, Aaron Hotchner. Nothing is going to change that.”
I leaned down and kissed her gently, careful not to hurt her. It dawned on me that we hadn’t really talked about what happened, but I didn’t want to think about all of that right now. I wanted to focus on the future—our future.
~Your POV~
You smiled at him warmly when your lips separated. His eyes were filled with affection and it made your heart flutter. His dark hair was messy and he looked tired, but he was still the sexiest man you’d ever laid eyes on.
Your eyes slowly wandered over his face and down his body, then back up again. You could see the lean muscles through his shirt and you felt the strong urge to place your hands under his shirt to feel the strong, smooth muscles of his abdomen and chest.
You felt a warm, tingling sensation throughout your body and he seemed to sense your desire. You saw him tense up and when you looked up at him, you saw the heat in his eyes. You smiled flirtatiously and gave him a little wink. You were too weak to do much of anything else, but he didn’t seem to mind.
“Later, I promise,” you murmured.
He shook his head. “I can wait forever if I have to, Izzy. As long as you’re with me.”
You smiled. “I won’t make you wait forever. You might be able to handle it, but I think I would die.”
Surprise lit up his handsome face. “Really?”
“I’ve spent the past 3 years pretending I didn’t have feelings for you. I’ve had to keep my thoughts and my hands to myself for a long time. I think I can hold on a little while longer.”
He smiled and gently caressed your face. “You’re so incredibly beautiful.”
You closed your eyes and leaned into his hand. “I probably look like hell right now, judging by the way I feel.”
He shook his head. “You’re perfect.”
Your eyes widened slightly.
“I’m serious,” he insisted. “Absolutely perfect.”
You gave him a small smile, but you didn’t say anything. You could feel the medication wearing off and the pain had been slowly intensifying. You tried not to react…you didn’t want this moment to end.
“I can’t wait to tell Jack,” he said with a smile.
Your eyes lit up. “Jack! Oh, I miss him.” You paused. “I—I hope he’s okay with this.”
He grabbed your hand. “He adores you, Isabelle. I have no doubt he’ll be thrilled.”
You nodded. “I hope so. I just don’t want him to feel like I’m trying to replace his mother.”
Aaron shook his head. “Jack and I both know you would never try to do that, Iz.” He paused. “But since you are the closest thing he’s had to a mother since Haley died. Don’t ever feel like you’re not good at it. He’s a lucky boy and I’m an extraordinarily lucky man.”
Your heart warmed at his words. You felt tears pressing on the backs of your eyes, so you joked to lighten the mood. “You certainly won’t feel so lucky when he’s a teenager,” you said lightly.
Aaron laughed. “Thank god we have a while before that particular nightmare.” He gazed at you affectionately. “You’ll be an amazing mother.” This time, you couldn’t stop the tears. Aaron gently wiped them away with his thumb. “What’s wrong?”
You shook your head, smiling softly. “Nothing—I’ve just never been this happy.”
He grinned and leaned in to kiss you. When he pulled back, he bumped into your side and you winced slightly. Unfortunately, Aaron noticed and immediately examined you with a worried expression. “Are you in pain?”
“No, I’m alright,” you lied.
He narrowed his eyes. “You winced.”
You tried to move your arm to wave him off, but pain shot up your arm and you groaned involuntarily.
“Alright, that’s it. You need pain medication,” he said as he reached for your call button.
You tried to stop him, but you were too weak and in too much pain.
The nurse came in and Aaron told her that you were in pain. She came over to you and gave you a shot of morphine in spite of your protests.
“There’s no need to suffer,” she said gently.
“But it makes me so tired,” you said sleepily. The morphine’s effect was almost instantaneous.
“Good,” the nurse replied. “You need your rest.”
Aaron thanked her and she left the room. You reached for his hand and he wrapped yours in his.
“Don’t leave me,” you murmured.
“I’ll never leave you,” he whispered as he leaned down to kiss your hand.
You drifted off to sleep with his words ringing happily in your head.
**********
Unfortunately, the happy feeling didn’t last long. The moment you fell asleep, you fell into a nightmare. Maybe ‘memory’ was a better term for it.
You were lying on the floor, face down, and you heard movement above you. You couldn’t see anything and you had no idea where you were. It didn’t take long for you to realize you were naked. You tried to move, but your arms were restrained above your head.
Fear gripped you and you heard a male voice right behind you. “You’re so soft, Isabelle.”
The man’s hands slid down your back and you tensed. His breathing was heavy and you could feel his body pressed up against your own. You struggled and he laughed loudly. “It’s futile, Isabelle. You can’t escape me.”
With a grunt, then man plunged his erection inside of you and you cried out in pain. He continued thrusting, ignoring your pleas and your tears. Each thrust was more painful than the last, your blood the only lubrication he had.
Finally the man stopped and you silently thanked God for the reprieve…
You awoke to find yourself strapped to a cold metal table. You were still naked, but you were in a lot more pain than you were before. You looked down at your body and you saw cuts on various parts of your body. You couldn’t remember how you got them or how you ended up here.
You heard someone enter the room, but you couldn’t see anyone. Then a man spoke, “Isabelle…don’t you just look delicious?”
You shivered involuntarily and he moved into your field of vision. Surprise lit up your face as he came into focus. He was holding a knife and smiling at you. Your breath caught in your chest as you gasped, “Aaron?”
He smiled wider. “We’re going to have fun, you and I,” he said as cut into your thigh and you screamed in agony.
**********
You jolted awake, heart racing, breathing ragged. Aaron’s face was hovering over yours, concern covering his handsome features. A moment of fear gripped you and you flinched away from him before reality settled in and you realized it had been a dream. This was your Aaron, not the one from the nightmare.
“Aaron,” you gasped as you grabbed his arm.
“What’s wrong?” he asked softly, brushing the hair away from your sweaty forehead.
“It was just a bad dream.”
His brow furrowed and his eyes traveled over your face. “Flashbacks?”
You closed your eyes and wished that for just one moment he couldn’t read you like a book. You sighed and looked up at him. “Worse. It was a flashback, but Jacobs wasn’t the one hurting me.”
“Who was?”
You shook your head. He didn’t need to know what you saw. “It doesn’t matter. I’m fine.”
“Izzy,” he said firmly. “You need to let it out.”
“Aaron, you don’t want to know.”
He gave you his patented glare. “Yes, I do.”
You sighed again. He was the most stubborn person you knew and it was making you crazy. So against your better judgment, you gave in to him. “You,” you whispered. “I saw you.”
His face turned white and he stepped back. “I would never hurt you.”
You reached for him and took his hand. “I know that. That’s why I said it doesn’t matter. It was a dream—it has no meaning.”
“Dreams sometimes have meaning, Isabelle. You know that. Maybe you’re subconsciously afraid of me—”
“Let me stop you right there, Dr. Freud. I’m not afraid of you, subconsciously or otherwise. Afraid of losingyou, yes, but afraid of you? Never.”
He smiled and sat down on the edge of the bed. “I’m overthinking this, aren’t I?”
You smiled back. “That’s sort of what you do.”
He laughed and it warmed your heart. “It’s just so new…I don’t want to mess it up.”
“So don’t,” you said simply. “Just be yourself…I already love that man, so you have nothing to worry about.”
He smiled. “I’ll do my best. I promise.”
“That’s all anyone can ask.” You paused. “Now how about you go find my doctor so we can see when I can go home, okay?”
He stood up. “With pleasure.” He leaned down and kissed your forehead.
You smiled up at him and he left to find the doctor.
#aaron hotchner x reader#aaron hotchner#hotch x reader#criminal minds fic#i can't live without you series
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Borrowing @strangefellows ’s and @redbud-tree’s keykids for this one, Jas and Cherry!
Day 2 of @khoc-week: Friendship!
For a… given definition of the word.
Even with the war in full swing and the Dandelions gone, the daily rote process of lux gathering was something everyone did - even those of them staying as neutral as possible. If nothing else, it powered up their medals and helped them keep somewhat grounded.
Etheria had finished up for the day, but hung around the streets around her favorite fountain plaza, unable to shake the feeling that something was going to happen. An itch beneath her skin that she got sometimes before something bad happened.
The scream that broke the tense silence validated the feeling and she was running almost as soon as it echoed out.
She skidded around the corner and stumbled to a stop at the sight of a small girl with bright pink hair struggling to free herself from the web of a Savage Spider, who was slowly moving towards her with gleaming eyes.
A younger wielder unfamiliar with the heartless had probably broken and egg and summoned the raid boss accidentally, and found herself far out of her league.
Etheria swore beneath her breath and threw herself forward, activating a medal to stun the heartless with a flare of light and heal the other girl. She slashed through the strands of web wrapped around the girl and caught her, leaping back out of immediate range of the heartless or its underlings.
The girl was squirming in her arms, trying to get herself free from the web, and Etheria set her down to help cut the web away. “You need to go-”
“No way!” The girl interrupted, scambling to her feet with a scowl as she summoned her keyblade. “I just managed to summon it! I’m gonna kill it and get all the lux!”
… so not an accident.
“You can’t beat a raid boss all by yourself at your level-” Her keyblade wasn’t even fully upgraded-
“Oh yeah? Watch me!”
“Wait no-”
The girl darted around Etheria, nimbly avoiding her attempt to grab her, and threw herself back at the spider. “You think I’m scared of you, you big ugly creepy? Think again!”
To her credit, she did manage to destroy one of the smaller spiders with a few good hits and a well timed medal activation. But that just made the big one angry, and Etheria barely managed to grab the girl and yank her back in time to avoid a hit.
“Okay, compromise,” Etheria said, arm firmly around the flailing girl’s waist. “You’re going to get yourself killed if you keep flailing around without a plan. If you refuse to run and desperately want to fight it, I’ll help you. But you have to listen, alright? Otherwise you’ll just get us both killed.”
The girl twisted around to scowl up at her, trying to get a good angle to elbow her in the stomach. “I didn’t ask for your help! I’m gonna kill it all by myself! That’ll show Jas that I can take care of myself so he’ll stop nagging all the time!”
Oh, so that’s how it was.
“You can’t prove anything if you’re dead,” Etheria argued, struggling to keep a grip on her. “And you’re not strong enough to fight that thing, no matter how much you want to-”
“Yes I can, put me down!”
Etheria cursed as the girl finally managed to twist around to jab her with a sharp little elbow and escape her grasp. She scrambled after her as the girl leapt at the spider with another screech.
Said screech was cut off with a grunt as the spider lunged at her to attack and a dark shape burst from a nearby alley to grab the small girl and deflect the spider’s manacles. Etheria sent a burst of fire at the smaller ones to fend them off while the new figure made a retreat.
Keeping a wary eye on the giant spider and it’s underling - now down to one after her fireball - she walked over to where the figure had consolidated itself into a boy a couple of years older than her and was growling at the girl in his arms.
“What were y’thinkin’, runnin’ off on your own and tryin’ to take down a godsforsaken raid boss all by yourself-”
The girl was squirming and struggling with a fierce pout. “I can do it! I told you I can, and I can! Lemme go Jas-”
“As if, you’re gonna stay right th’ hell here, Cherry.”
The high pitch of the obnoxious whine she let out in response made Etheria wince. “If you want to take her and get away, I can deal with the spider.”
The boy glanced over with a frown, shaking his head sharply. “Nah, ‘m not gonna do that t’you. No need for you t’clean up our mess just ‘cause someone,” he flashed a sharp glare at the girl, “doesn’t know her own limits.”
Cherry blew a raspberry up at him, crossing her arms with a pout.
Etheria shrugged a little wryly. “I’m used to rescuing new wielders from raid bosses, so it’s no problem on my end.”
“She probably just wants the lux! She’s stealing my kill!”
Etheria felt something tight and cold squeeze in her chest at the accusation, the words echoing the voices of too many others in this whole stupid war, and her hand tightened the slightest bit warily around her Starlight.
The boy sighed. “Shut up, Cherry.”
The girl squawked in offense, but it set Etheria a bit at ease.
“I don’t care about the lux,” she said quietly. “If you want it you can have it. But seven year olds shouldn’t be fighting raid bosses, especially not by themselves.”
“I’M NINE.”
Etheria sent her a very dubious look. She’d been nine when she’d arrived in Daybreak Town, and this girl was definitely younger than she’d been. “… sure. Nine year olds shouldn’t either. That’s how you die.”
“Oh look, someone with actual common sense,” Jas muttered under his breath. “She’s right, Cherry, now shut up and stay here before y’get hurt. Again.” He set her down and she stomped her feet angrily.
“You’re such a jerk! I can take care of myself!” Cherry’s eyes welled up in frustration, making her scrub at them as her shoulders hitched. “I-I can! I can do it! I don’t n-need your he-lp! It’s not fair!”
He sighed, kneeling down in front of her. “That’s not th’ point, Cherry. Yeah, you’re strong, no one’s gonna doubt that. But these things are somethin’ else, y’know that. Plenty o’ people don’t wanna fight ‘em alone, even if they can. I sure as hell don’t. And you gettin’ hurt isn’t gonna make me worry any less, it’s just gonna make me worry more.”
The girl sniffled, glaring at the ground. “But I don’t want you to…”
“Tough luck, you’re stuck with me. kiddo.” He ruffled her hair and pushed himself to his feet as the spider began getting restless behind them. “So, tag team this bastard?”
Etheria sent him a nod, turning back to the spider. “Fine with me. I don’t mind if she helps, but…”
“Yeah. Y’good to take point, Cherry?”
The girl’s lip was still trembling, but she raised her keyblade with a nod. “I’ll listen…”
“Good. Little one first, then th’ big guy?”
“Yeah!”
“Want me to take support, or interference?”
“I’ll handle interference, if y’wanna keep us healed up and buffed.”
Ugh. Support. “Sure, I can do that.” Etheria raised her blade, activating the upright medal with the redhead girl on it. “Go get ‘em.”
A small smirk pulled at the boy’s mouth as he leapt forward just behind Cherry, who flung herself forward with a yell.
Recklessness aside, Cherry was surprisingly strong for her age and with Jas running interference on the Savage Spider Etheria didn’t actually have to offer much support. He was powerful too - enough so that she was really hoping the neutrality of their interaction so far continued and she wouldn’t be forced to fight him - so other than the occasional heal and the regular repeat of buffs on them and debuffs on the spider she… didn’t really have to do much.
Which was partially why she preferred being at the center of the fight. Let Yiskah and Aella do support, they preferred it.
The fight was wrapped up fairly quickly with Jas helping, and Cherry cheered as the spider faded away and the light was drawn into her bangle.
Etheria sent one last healing spell their way to take care of any lingering scrapes and bruises, then dismissed her keyblade. For a long moment she debated slipping away while they were both distracted, but she couldn’t deny her own curiosity. There was something about them that was… familiar. Not in a personal way, but… their magic.
The girl less so - she had strong magic clinging to her that was likely tied to whatever world she was from, but the feel of it was familiar only in that it had a similar shape and feel as that which the humans used in her own world of Enchanted Dominion.
The boy though… he felt like her. Magic seeped into his very essence, a muddy mix of human and unmistakably fae. Different enough that she could tell that he wasn’t from her world, but the base feel of it was the same.
It didn’t really matter, she knew - she’d met several people with fae or fairy lineage here. Had even met a fairy or two from different worlds. But this was the first time she’d met someone who felt quite this similar.
It drew her in, made her feel a likely-misplaced sense of kinship.
“You’re both alright then?” she asked as she approached.
They turned and the boy nodded. “We are, yeah. Thanks for th’ help, and for tryin’ t’keep Cherry out o’ trouble. I would say she’s a magnet for it if the truth wasn’t that she goes lookin’ for it.”
Cherry stuck her tongue out at him.
“I can tell,” Etheria flashed him a wry smile. “I take it this sort of thing happens a lot?”
“You got no idea,” he rolled his eyes. “Pretty sure ‘Cherry, no’ is ingrained in my vocabulary forever now. It’s jus’ reflexive.”
Etheria laughed as the girl protested. “That doesn’t surprise me. I’m Etheria, by the way. What about you?”
He hesitated a moment, something wary flashing in his eyes, before he answered slowly. “I’m… Jas. Jas Tallow.”
Ah, he could sense her fae nature. No wonder he was wary to give his name, and had likely altered it somehow.
She flashed him a smile. “Nice to meet you, Jas. And I’m not fully fae any more than you are, don’t worry. I’ll not be stealing your name. I wouldn’t have anything to do with it here anyway - not in this place.”
Well, that wasn’t necessarily true, she supposed. Not with the war going on - frankly controlling or possessing members of other Unions probably was… something to keep an eye out for.
Judging by his raised brow, he was having similar thoughts.
“Okay fair, I would, but I’m not the type.”
“I’ll jus’ take y’ at your word, shall I?” he asked, crossing his arms. “Still, I do appreciate th’ help.”
“Hmmmm,” Cherry narrowed her eyes and leaned comically far forward. “What Union are you anyway?”
Etheria stiffened as Jasper groaned, “Cherry. It doesn’t matter.”
“But I’m curious!” The girl protested. “If she’s in one of our Unions then it all makes sense!”
Unions, plural. So they weren’t hyper-loyal to their Unions like so many others had become, at least. “Given I don’t even know which Unions you belong to, that logic doesn’t really track, does it?” She pointed out. “I don’t really care much about Union loyalty - if someone is in trouble I help. This whole war is stupid anyway, we don’t even know the real point of it.” She still didn’t know why Aced was so set on killing her - every time they were in proximity they ended up fighting and he wouldn’t even tell her why.
“Hear hear,” Jas agreed with a scoff. “I can’t believe anyone’s takin’ it seriously. Like… it’s so pointless. Collect the most lux t’do what with it?”
She grimaced. What indeed… if everyone knew what it was some of the Union leaders were actually planning…
She didn’t want to know how much worse it would get if Gula’s plan became known. She didn’t think it would work, none of them thought it would work, but…
Etheria nodded crossing her arms. “Yeah. Everything’s gotten so far out of control I don’t think even the Union leaders know what the plans are anymore.”
“Hrmmm.” Cherry puffed out her cheeks. “That’s not what I was asking.”
Such a kid… she shouldn’t be too surprised she supposed. Etheria sighed. “Unicornis, if you’re that worried about it.”
Cherry made a face and nodded. “That makes sense, no wonder you’re so stuffy.”
“Wha- hey!”
“It’s true!!” The girl pointed at her in accusation. “You’re Unicornis so you’re stuffy and no fun, and Jas is Vulpes so he’s a worrywart who’s always nagging!”
… Etheria wasn’t used to being offended at stupid Union stereotypes, but stuffy???
Her party would have a stitch laughing so hard if Cherry had said that to their face. Half the time she was the one they were dragging out of trouble.
Some of her offense must have shown on her face because Jas snorted. “Y’know the stereotypes are bull, Cherry. Even if y’are th’ perfect stereotypical representation of Ursus.”
She stuck her tongue out at him, drawing a huff of laughter from Etheria.
“Maybe I’m boring compared you, then,” she said, “but my friends would beg to differ. Especially given how often I end up fighting Aced…”
They both whipped around to stare at her, Cherry’s expression disbelieving “You’ve fought Master Aced? Multiple times? And you’ve won???”
“I- I never said I won,” Etheria corrected quickly.
“You wouldn’t be here if you hadn’t!”
… alright fair. “Normally yes, but I think he and Master Ira are specifically keeping tabs on each other because Master Ira - or sometimes Master Invi - always shows up not long after the fight starts so I can slip away.” Eventually she might find out why the Union leaders were so interested in her - Ava made sense, and Ira could be rationalized, but the other three? Invi’s was likely a side result of her friendship with Yiskah, but Gula had approached her himself in that house, and Aced was more hostile towards her than anyone else aside from Ira.
Perhaps it was just her connection to the Dandelions.
Jas was looking at her like she was a puzzle, something suspicious in his gaze. She shrugged helplessly at him.
“I don’t know what I did to make him hate me, unless it’s just because Master Ira likes me and I was involved with Master Ava’s… group.”
His eyes widened. “Y’were a Dandelion.”
“No, I… was offered a place, and I had several friends among them, but I… I couldn’t just leave. Not when so many people would be left behind.” She glanced away, twisting her sleeve between her fingers. “My party’s the same. We all turned down the offer, and we’re just… trying to help whoever we still can. Anyone who doesn’t want to fight, or the kids who shouldn’t be on the front lines or aren’t strong enough to protect themselves.”
“Huh. That’s… admirable. There a lot o’ you?”
“There’s only six- five. Five core members.” The memory of Vale’s betrayal still stung nearly as much as the dark scar he’d left across her torso. “There’s around a dozen of active members overall, with about two dozen others under our protection.”
“That’s not a lot,” Cherry said, bouncing on her toes. “Most parties I know are like, a hundred people!”
“There ain’t any hundred person parties, Ursus’ entire Union is less’n five hundred people,” Jas sighed. “I don’t even know if you’ve ever been in a real party. A dozen is on th’ smaller side, though.”
Etheria shrugged. “We were bigger, but the Dandelions left, and we’ve… had casualties.” She tried not to think of many they’d lost, not even bodies left behind to remember them. She shook her head. “Do you guys have a party, or support?”
“We don’t need a party, we can take care of ourselves!” Cherry declared, settling her hands on her hips.
Jas shook his head, hedging, “Not a proper party, no, but we’ve got… friends… who help out here an’ there. S’good enough.”
Ah, true loner types. The offer on the tip of her tongue died, and she nodded. “Well if you need a few more, we’re usually in the area. Ask the Moogle about talking to someone from the Light’s Guard and he’ll let us know that you want to meet up.”
Jas’ expression was startled, brows furrowed. “You… don’t know anything about us.”
“I know you’re loner types, I know you’re going out of your way to protect a kid with a penchant for trouble, and I know you’re they type to fight side by side with a person from another Union, no questions ask, and let them play healer for you.” She flashed him a wry smile, crossing her arms. “As they say, actions speak louder than words, and you’ve a good heart Jas Tallow. I don’t need your full name to read that.” She turned away, tossing a wave over her shoulder. “Send a word our way if you ever need help, or you find someone who does.”
As Etheria walked away she heard Cherry’s loud whisper, “… she was weird.” and snorted to herself.
It was a shame they weren’t interested in joining a party - she would have loved to see their reactions to the others.
This was fun, thanks for letting me borrow your kids! Hopefully I did them justice. Etheria is absolutely nonplussed at Cherry, what is she supposed to do with this child. How is Jas not driven insane.
#khux#khocweek2023#kingdom hearts#union cross#keykid#friends/lovers#i would have done lovers but etheria skuld and ephemera don't really qualify#they're in that 'are they aren't they' area#the memory wipe thing doesn't help#yiskah had something going on with brain but then brain left and yiskah died#yiskah's gonna my missing link protag because i have etheria busy being someone else so maybe he and brain can hold hands there
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I’ve Told You Now - Bucky Barnes smut
The one where alpha!Bucky fucks you in front of the other avengers
Warnings: smut, a/b/o dynamics, public sex, oral (f), p in v, possessiveness
Word count: 2.3k
A/N: Thank you to my lovely @wakingbeauty for giving this a read for me! This is strictly the product of mine and @navybrat817‘s belief that public sex should be more common in A/B/O dynamics, so there you have it 😊 Also, I used a prompt the sweet @jbreenr gave me ages ago for a headcanon and I asked to save it for this story since it made such perfect sense! Hope you guys like it! I might write more public sex A/B/O smut in the very near future!
Bucky’s P.O.V.
Everyday was the same. I’d wake up and join the rest of the team for breakfast to find out that despite the fact that someone had saved me a seat, that same someone had thought of a new joke to make at my expense.
If I thought Tony’s nicknames were bad, this was a whole new level. It’s like she wanted to find all the little ways to annoy me, while still remaining mindful of my recovery process and triggers.
I’d never met an omega like that before. Back in my time, omegas were mostly prim and proper, almost shy around alphas, even if they were starting to show a little more skin and entertain the possibility of staying closer to us for longer periods of time.
I wasn’t used to someone who felt so comfortable with my intimidating aura, and the alpha in me definitely couldn’t grow used to seeing so much of her skin all the time. By now, I was sure she was doing it on purpose.
She knew how it affected me, she could smell it - every omega was able to identify when a nearby alpha was aroused. And I knew it turned her on in return. I was also biologically wired to sense that.
It was basically a game of who would break first. And I knew she thought she would win, but my resolve still wasn’t broken.
“Ah… What a lovely day. So full of possibilities… if you’re not a hundred years old,” she quickly added, throwing me a glance that had me rolling my eyes. “What do you say, grandpa? Feel like going out for a run?”
Who knows what I would have answered if she hadn’t decided to pull her hair up right at the second Wanda opened the window to look out into the field? The smile that had been on my face quickly dropped when I was hit with a heavy wave of her scent and my knees buckled as I tried to hold myself back from just jumping on top of her.
Unfortunately, because awareness was not something she seemed capable of having, she did not realize my struggle. “What’s wrong, old man? Can’t even keep up anymore?” The growl that escaped my chest at her joke was all the warning she needed to finally understand what was going on.
“I’ll show you what I can keep up.” I was on her in a second, my consciousness of our surroundings reduced to absolutely nothing. It was only her and me, and the way our lips moved as I guided her back to the couch, until we both fell on top of it.
“Is this what you wanted, huh?” I asked as I tore her shirt with a simple flick of my wrist. “Is this how you wanted it to happen? For me to lose all control and just take you right here?” All that left her was a garbled sound, her hands clawing at my back as I easily got rid of her jeans until they were nothing but scraps on the floor and then exposed her pussy to the tower’s living room.
“Fuck yes,” I growled, immediately leaning down to get a taste of her. Sweet and wet and mine, all mine. I had no idea where that possessive instinct had come from, but I would be crazy to ignore it - especially since it felt like I’d kill and die for her at that very second.
Her hips jerked up, instinctively searching for my tongue, but a breeze of clarity seemed to brush over her and make her sit up on her elbows, looking down at me. I knew what was running through her mind before she said it, and I wasn’t having any of it.
“You better lay back down and let me savor my meal,” I warned, knowing the rest of the team had gathered around to watch the show. I didn’t have to take my eyes off her debauched state to know it, but her gaze was on them, even if the rest of her body was still spread open for anyone to see, uncaring of the fact that we were being watched.
“You poked the beast, now you’ll entertain it,” Steve warned, shaking his head as if to scold us, but when I met his eyes, I could see the glint of desire in them. He wanted to be in my position, he wanted to have his own tongue shoved deep inside my girl’s pussy, and it only made me eat her more hungrily.
“Eyes on me, ‘mega,” I called out to her once I saw her eyes linger on Steve. “Let them watch, that’ll keep them away from you.” She groaned at the possessiveness in my words, but it was the sounds of someone who was relishing in it. And I was relishing in her juices.
“Fuck!” She cursed when I buried my tongue as far as it could go in her, something deep inside of me desperate to be drowning in her scent. “Should have gotten you mad before.”
The thought was amusing to me. Did she really think this was only the result of pent-up anger, and not months of desire and lust that had finally spilled from my weakened resolve?
“Well…” I started, pushing two fingers inside of her to scissor her open for me, although my scent had already made her body as prepared for an Alpha an Omega could get.
I was a bit larger than usual Alphas, though - courtesy of the serum - so I wanted to make sure she wouldn’t go through any pain whatsoever. “You keep me mad all the fucking time, kitten.”
Y/N’s P.O.V.
“With desire or anger, it doesn’t really care,” he continued, like it was any ordinary day and we were chatting in the living room, our usual teasing banter taking over the conversation, instead of him eating me out on the couch in front of all of our teammates while I was spread out for their eyes to take in.
“You’re always a tease to me, in one way or another.” His huge hands massaged the inside of my thighs as he finally lowered himself to suck on my nub again, making me instinctively buck my hips up in search of his tongue.
“Stay…” he ordered in his Alpha tone, and the whine that broke free from my chest was more animal than human now. The way he used his mouth was nothing short of sinful, licking me from ass to clit with an eagerness I had never expected the former Winter Soldier to have.
But I guess today I was discovering all of my fantasies about Bucky had been a bit misplaced. For one, I never thought he’d be the type of Alpha to take me in such a public environment.
In every dirty dream I’d had, Bucky was far too possessive to allow anyone to explore what was his - even if it was only visually - but what I’d come to learn was that while he was definitely dominating, there was a hint of exhibitionism in his craving.
He liked to have people see him break me into a million pieces only to glue me back together with a lick of his tongue. He liked that they were seeing his talent - and I had to admit, by what I saw in his friend’s stare, that they were also admiring me too.
And he got off on that. I didn’t expect it would make me get off too.
“Delicious,” he hummed when he finally pulled away from my cunt, having brought me to my release and licked it off of me. Still, an overwhelming amount of wetness covered the lower part of his face, prompting me to raise myself to my elbows and lick my own juices off of his lips, the omega in me begging to scent him as mine.
“You’re a nasty little bitch, aren’t you?” He chuckled once the surprise faded away, easily manhandling me onto my stomach, the sound of a zipper being opened denouncing that he had undressed.
“Keep fucking me and you’ll find out.” I heard him spitting behind me, a shiver running up my spine as I realized he was playing with himself while looking at me presenting for him.
“Oh, I’ll do much better than that.” That was all the warning I got before I felt the head of his member poking my entrance, slowly but surely sliding in until he had bottomed out.
My whines became intensified when he pulled me up by my hair, his free hand covering my breast to rub my nipple as he whispered, “I’m gonna claim you, sweetheart. You think you’re ready for that? Think you’ll be able to take it?”
I was quickly realizing I had severely underestimated the man inside of me, even if not to the extent he thought I had. I was not ready for that. I don’t think I ever would be, but fuck if I wasn’t gonna take it anyway.
Because it was so much better than I ever imagined it to be.
“No more playing hard-to-get,” Bucky continued, finally starting to move and immediately settling on a punishing pace. “No more teasing me with your short skirts and tempting scent. You’ll be mine now, ‘mega. Forever. How does that sound?”
God, I wanted him to do it. I wanted him to keep exercising this complete control over my body that he had so easily managed to take. His cock was stretching me in ways I’d never been stretched before, his inflated knot slamming against my opening with each thrust.
“Always mocking me… Am I too old for you now?” I shivered as he licked a stripe up my neck. I knew he wouldn’t actually bite me in front of everyone - a claiming ritual was a sacred ritual, even the most feral of Alphas respected the intimacy of that. But the way he was taunting me was all too arousing, I couldn’t deny it. “Tell me.”
His hand squeezed my hip, looking for an answer. I tried to open my mouth, but nothing came out. His palm slipped further down, finding my clit, and as two fingers rubbed my own juices, around it, I screamed.
“N-No!” Bucky chuckled against my neck, body continuing his onslaught against mine as he nuzzled my scent gland. “Y-you’re not too old for me. Take me, take me please.” His coos were too provoking, making me cry out loud at the mocking sound.
“Aw, kitten…” His warm mouth breathed the next words against my ear, “I already did.” He turned my face towards his with his fingers tangled in my hair, engulfing my mouth with his.
“Alright.” A familiar voice spoke from not too far, startling me for a second as I once again was reminded that we were still very much surrounded by our team. “You two might just be the sexiest mates I’ve ever seen fuck.”
A growl escaped Bucky’s chest at hearing someone refer to us as mates for the first time, and I panted in need, desperate to cum, desperate for him. “Seen a lot of mates fuck, Romanoff?” He nibbled at my ear, hands roaming over my body as if to make it very clear to every person watching that they could look all they wanted, I was still his.
“You have no idea.” Looking over a bit to the side from where she was seated, there rested Sam’s almost limp body, a hand curled over his boner as his eyes never wavered from the place I was connected to the man behind me.
“Well, I know what I’m gonna think about tonight.” Something between a laugh and a moan escaped me, making Bucky growl again, hands pushing me back down onto the couch as his hips picked up the pace with which they’d ruin me.
To say I was soaked was the understatement of the century. I could feel it, running down my thighs, drenching the couch underneath me. I don’t know how we’d be able to use it again, but that was the least of my concerns in the moment.
“I am begging you to let me lick her pussy after you guys are done,” came Tony’s voice, and I knew Bucky would growl in his direction just from the way his fingers pressed tightly on the flesh of my hips. “Not that type of Alpha, sorry, I got it.”
I heard his footsteps retreating quickly, probably scared of what Bucky would do to him once we were done, but in the Alpha’s defense, Tony seemed to disappear from his mind the second he left the room, all of his senses directed to me and his goal of making me cum around his cock.
“C’mon, kitten,” he whispered, fingers easily locating my clit to play with me as he pulled me up to rest against his chest one more. “Come for me, milk me dry.” That was all I needed to give him what he wanted, and although I was anticipating to moan loudly as I creamed his knot, his mouth covered mine to swallow all of my sounds in a deep kiss, hands protectively covering me while pawing at my breasts at the same time.
“Steve,” Bucky called after he managed to catch his breath, having fallen on top of me on the couch once his knot popped open. “I won’t be able to work out with you today.”
I looked up as best as I could to find Steve already staring at us, although red from head to toe. “That’s understandable,” he spoke in a thick, rough voice that I barely recognized as his. “You seem to have worked out enough already.”
Bucky stopped running his nose against my cheek at his friend’s attempt at teasing, a slow smirk taking over his face as he joined me and stared at his friend. “Oh, I’m not nearly done,” he warned. “You’re more than welcome to join us for some cardio, if you want to.”
The soft smile Steve sent our way told us everything we needed to know about his plans for the evening.
#my fics#alpha au#bucky barnes smut#bucky barnes#smut#bucky barnes x reader#bucky barnes reader#bucky barnes reader insert#bucky barnes reader inserts#bucky barnes fanfiction#bucky barnes oneshot
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Confident 02 | jjk
↳ Summary: After giving Jungkook the best suck of his life he’s left wondering if what you said was true. Was it really your first time? ‘Cause Jungkook thinks you might’ve lied.
↳ Pairing: Jungkook x Reader
↳ Genre: Smut, fluff, angst, college au, fuckboy! jk, our fav cheeky virgin reader!
↳ Rating: 18+
↳ Word count: 8.8k
↳ Warnings: swearing, mentions of past toxic relationship, mentions of being pressured into sex, mentions of body image, mentions of stds, Jungkook being very confused, no smut in this part
↳ a/n: here it is !!! thank you for all the love for the first part, i hope you enjoy this part ! please feel free to leave any feedback <3
↳ Series: 01 | 02 | 03 | 04
Previously...
“She said it's her first time.” He pauses, looking up at his friends' concerned faces. “I think she might’ve lied.”
“I’m sorry, what?”
Jungkook groans, cradling his head before banging it on the table. The utensils on the table rattle and clang, bringing unwanted attention to his mini breakdown. Taehyung is quick to place his hand under Jungkook's forehead just as he goes in for another blow. “Ok, Jungkook- Jungkook!” Jimin giggles beside him. “Fucking stop, people are staring.”
Jungkook pauses and subtly peeks out of his long bangs, checking to see that Taehyung’s words were indeed true. He breathes out and sits up in his chair, fixing his shirt to play off that he wasn’t just having a mental meltdown.
Jimin rolls his eyes, “soooo are you gonna talk now, cause’ I have a horrible headache and you’re really not helping.”
Jungkook nods opening his mouth to speak. “Alright so uh, I met a girl last night and-”
“I thought you went home?” Taehyung shoves Jimin’s shoulder and Jungkook glares, “yeah, well that clearly didn’t happen.” He rubs his temples, “could you do me a favour and let me speak first, and then you can ask the questions. Ok?”
The two boys nod, settling into their seats as Jungkook delves back into his story.
“Alright so anyways, I saw this girl and like, I haven’t ever seen her before? She was literally perfect”. He exhales looking at nothing at particular as he continues. “Gorgeous face, prettiest lips and oh! speaking of her lips, God the way she sucked-”
Despite what Jungkook said earlier, Taehyung feels the need to intervene. “Ok as much as I love a good suck myself, I need you to stop here, we don’t need the graphics.” Jimin nods in agreement even though it’s clear he’s not paying an ounce of attention. Jungkook smirks at the memory, but it soon drops as he remembers one tiny detail. He places his hands on the table, total seriousness etched onto his face. “But here’s the kicker, she said it was her first time.”
Confusion.
“So did you or did you not take her virginity?”Jungkook crosses his arms. “No, after that she just up and left.” “Wait, fuck”, Jungkook suddenly realises, “I didn’t even make her cum”, he groans and Taehyung bursts into laughter. This finally garners Jimin’s attention, his dazed eyes squinting. “Who’s the girl?” Jungkook sighs, “if you were listening before you would’ve heard me say that I don’t know her.” Jimin leans forward,“well can you at least describe her? I pretty much know everyone who attended the party”
Jungkook doesn’t have to think that hard. “She was wearing this plaid skirt and like a white top-” Jimin’s eyes widen, “Holy shit, Y/N?! Man, Jin’s gonna kill you.” This makes Jungkook pause, thoughts running back to the text he had received from Jin. “Wait, they’re not a thing are they?” Jimin chokes, “God no, they’ve been family friends since like forever, Jin’s practically her protective older brother.”
That explained his text earlier. Jungkook furrows his brows, more questions beginning to arise and spill out of his mouth. “How come I’ve never met her and if she’s a virgin, then how- how did-”, Taehyung cuts in, “dude she’s done other things before.” More confusion. “And how would you know that?” Taehyung smirks, shrugging as he gets up out of his chair. “I'm gonna get a drink, Jimin, you want anything?” God, his head is spinning. “Sure, you know my usual.”
It was the way Taehyung spoke too casually, like your lifestyle choices were common knowledge. How the fuck hasn’t he met you, yet his friends seem to be well acquainted with your existence? “What the fuck was that look?” He focuses on Taehyung from where he orders his drinks. “Did you see it Jimin? Kinda sus.”
Jimin remains nonchalant, blowing a strand of hair out of his sight before answering one of Jungkook’s urgent queries. “Jin never introduced you to her because well…” He looks Jungkook up and down with an unimpressed look. “You would get your grimy hands on her immediately. And Then after that, It’s like she never existed ” Jungkook opens his mouth, rebuttal on the tip of his tongue. “Don’t argue with me boy, the second you met her, you already wanted her on your dick, did you not?”
Jungkook is shocked to say the least, jaw hanging open as Taehyung makes his way back to the table, drinks in hand. “Oh God, what did you tell him?” Jungkook slams his fist on the table, yet again grabbing the attention of people around them. “That is not true! I have standards, and what about you two. You guys are just as bad.” He points accusingly at the bruises peeking out of Taehyung’s loose shirt, “Look at Tae! Those hickies are probably a combination of the three girls he fucked last week!”
Jimin doesn’t want to get kicked out of the cafe, so he attempts to calm down a soon to be raging Jungkook. “Look, to put it nicely, you’re a heartbreaker, you lead girls on whereas Tae and I actually tell people we’re not interested in anything more than a hookup.”
Jungkook seems to understand where he’s coming from. He can admit, he does have quite the reputation if the amount of times he’s been slapped in the face says anything. But now, with this newfound information, he can also admit that you’ve certainly intrigued him, that was for sure.
Jungkook wants to see you again.
Not for a rump in the sheets, but rather a friendly conversation.
It was just his luck that he had heard through the grapevine that you had been invited to one of Jin’s small pool party get togethers. If Jungkook was being honest, he’s quite excited to be within your vicinity again but he knows he needs to keep his cool. Especially after the series of death threats and slaps on the neck from Jin. He shudders at the memory.
And so, Jungkook prepares himself more than he usually does. He wants to do it right this time. No flirty teasing, just friendly innocent conversation. He makes sure to carefully pick out the right swim shorts that display the thickness of his thighs. Not for any sexual gain, more so to show off the hours spent at the gym in hopes that maybe he can get you to become more interested in him as he is to you. He sounds desperate, and he’s sure you’re not that materialistic, but he has this nagging want to impress you somehow. He huffs and does a few pushups, for extra measure of course.
He’s not sure as to why his brain decided to make him act this way. You’re more or less a stranger to him. However, when Jungkook begins his short journey to Jin’s house he really lets himself think, which usually isn't a good idea.
Jungkook doesn’t know you, but you’ve definitely left an imprint in his mind which makes you all the more fascinating. It’s news to him that you seem to be very close to his small circle of friends which is probably thanks to your deeply rooted friendship with Jin. That new piece of information had been bugging him since the day he met up with Taehyung and Jimin. Surely his reputation couldn’t be the only reason why you’ve never met him. Right?
Parking his car in Jin’s enormous driveway, he makes his way up to the grand front door. Sometimes he wishes he could live a life like Jin. He grew up being fed with a silver spoon his whole life. Having everything paid for instead of rolling in the miseries of college student debt.
Once Jungkook makes his way into the large house, he sets down the drinks he had brought onto the kitchen counter and watches his best friends goof around and enjoy the summer sun with a warm grin. He chuckles quietly when Jin pushes Jimin and his perfectly styled hair into the pool. Jimin screams a slur of curses while Jin quickly runs beside a sleeping Yoongi for protection.
Slipping out of his loose oversized shirt, Jungkook scans the entirety of Jin’s backyard, looking for the face that has been haunting him since that fateful night. She’s not here. He reexamines the pool seeing nothing but the chaotic mess of his favourite people, and he sighs. Just as he prepares to step out into the blazing sun, the sound of his stomach growling stops him in his tracks.
Thinking about you made him nervous. So nervous that his stomach couldn’t bear the thought of breakfast. However, after the realisation that you hadn’t arrived just yet, makes him do a full one eighty, long strides taking him to Jin’s expensive fridge.
His head is already deep into the fridge when he hears the sound of the sliding door opening, revealing a dripping Jin with a small scowl on his face. It seems Jimin finally got his revenge. “I’m starving you got any leftovers?” Jungkook queries, his head popping out from the cool air of the fridge.
Jin grabs a fresh towel and whacks it against Jungkook’s naked back. “What’s the point of even asking when you’re already going through my damn fridge!” Jungkook flashes Jin an innocent grin and glows when he discovers a small bowl of Chinese takeout.
It very quickly dawns on Jungkook that in order to enjoy a nice warm meal, he would need to heat it up. His stomach all but roars, not used to the lack of food in its system and Jungkook wants to cry. He wants to cry and it's not from the angry hunger pains, but rather something extremely laughable. He has to use a fucking microwave.
You’re running late, there’s sweat running down your brow and you feel like your arms will fall off any second. The weight of snacks and alcohol you had brought making you stagger as you finally enter Jin’s enormous home.
The one and only thing that’s on your mind is the refreshing feeling of slipping into Jin’s pool while sipping on an iced beverage. This motivates you enough to put all the strength left in your exhausted being to speedily walk into the kitchen and throw everything onto the counter.
“AHH FUCK!” You flinch at the sudden scream, hugging your body protectively. Jungkook slowly pops out from behind the other side of the counter, his doe eyes big and wide. “You fucking scared me Jesus!” He exclaims, running a hand through sweaty bangs.
The air had escaped your lungs long before you could utter your next sentence as the sight before you has you freezing. There he was, Jeon Jungkook in all his glory. Tanned skin and taut muscle sculpted by the Gods. You didn’t mean to stare, but how could you not! Your eyes had a mind of their own. He’s glorious, every single part of him, and you’re not even afraid to admit it. Your eyes are quick to eat him up, tracing the art staining the whole of his right arm and you wonder what every swirl of ink means to him.
Jungkook coughs awkwardly, going in to scratch at his neck. You imagined he would tease you about your obvious ogling, but it never came. Strange. “Why were you hiding?” You ask, dropping your gaze from his body in order to arrange the snacks into neat piles, using it as an excuse to slowly step closer to him. “Oh! Uh-”, he scratches his head, looking down at his feet before jumping five feet into the air, a startled gasp leaving his lips when the timer of the microwave goes off.
You burst into laughter and Jungkook flushes in embarrassment. Jin had told you about Jungkook’s embarrassing fear of microwaves but you never thought you would see it first hand. You hold in the laughs that tickle your throat and try to settle him down by lightly touching his shoulder. He flinches at your touch.
“Are you okay?” You’re really close to him now. Your chest is practically pressed up against his and Jungkook gulps. How was it possible that you could look even more stunning than the last time he saw you? Your cheeks are glowing from the soft golden rays of the afternoon sun and the way you look up at him, your soft smile curling makes his head spin.
“Yeah, I’m good”, he breaks eye contact in embarrassment. “Sorry, just uh, microwaves are scary you know?” You giggle up at him. Is this really Jungkook? The Jungkook you’ve seen flaunting a new girl every week just to abruptly break her heart when he can’t promise anything more than sex?
You’re not complaining, he’s quite adorable like this.
You’re not too sure why his personality has the sudden switch up. It could possibly be the fact that he’s with his closest friends and doesn’t feel the need to put up his playboy persona. Although, the way he blushes when he looks at you plays a different story. Do you make him nervous? Surely not, if the memories of that heated night are anything to go by.
“So uh, are you gonna head into the pool?” His empty stomach is long forgotten as he gestures to the large backyard, you nod up at him excitedly. It’s then Jin decides to bust back into the kitchen, a stern gaze set on his face. “Y/N, can I speak with you for a minute?” Jungkook cautiously takes a step away from you, your bodies no longer close to each other and you notice this with a small frown.
“Yeah, sure”, you relent walking over to Jin who places a protective arm around your shoulders. Unknowingly to you, Jin traps Jungkook down with a hard stare and signals Jungkook to go outside, to which he accepts with a nod.
“I know what you’re gonna say, and no I do not see him like that”, you cross your arms defensively. Jin sighs, “I just don’t wanna see you get hurt again.” He places his hands on your shoulders, full lecture mode on. “Let’s face it, you’re a hopeless romantic, I can’t trust that you won’t do something stupid, but you and Jungkook… You’re both important friends of mine and-”
You’ve heard his overprotective brotherly speech plenty of times, “I know, and I’m so thankful that you’re looking out for me. I just don’t see the harm in befriending him, you’ve never let me speak to him before.” Jin releases his hold on your shoulders to fix the mess of his wet hair, “and there's a reason for that.”
Why was he so damn hard-headed. Jin loves Jungkook like he loves his family. It just didn't make any sense to you that Jin could approve of their friendship but when it comes to you, he completely shields you away from any interactions with the so called playboy.
“When are you going to stop protecting me from boys?” Jin senses your frustration immediately. “I may be younger than you, but I’m also an adult just like you. An adult that can make her own choices.” You exhale slowly, “You’ve let me befriend your whole group and they’ve been nothing but wonderful to me, I don’t see the wrong in getting to know Jungkook.”
Jin lets his guard down. You do have a point, maybe he was being a little too overprotective. He gives you a soft smile, you look away.
“You’re right, I am in no position to dictate your decisions and who you choose to hang around with, it was wrong of me to treat you like that. Jin looks out into the pool, watching Jungkook tackle Taehyung. “I’m sorry I was a bit too harsh, Jungkook’s a good kid, he just got into the wrong crowd at first. Although, you gotta promise to tell me if he hurts you, cause he knows I’ll beat his ass.”
You laugh accepting his apology, “are you sure about that? He’s a literal muscle pig.” You both begin to make your way outside and Jin shoves you slightly, “hey! You know I’m right.” Jin shakes his head and brings you into a comforting hug. “Yeah, yeah whatever.” He rolls his eyes, you beam up at him and together you walk out into the warm sunlight.
It hadn’t even been a second since you stepped outside, and already Yoongi’s long term girlfriend, Jieun is squealing your way. “Y/N! I’m so happy you're finally here, the amount of testosterone out here was starting to make me feel faint.” You giggle at her exasperated tone, pulling her into a tight hug.
Nonchalantly you peel off your flowy sundress, it’s stickiness from your sweat making you cringe. “I missed you last week, why didn’t you come to class?” Jiuen pouts, “I'm sorry bub, I somehow caught a cold, but I trust you have some notes for me.”
The way Jieun flutters her lashes at you innocently forces a roll from your eyes. Slathering sunscreen onto your arms, you reprimand her, “I swear you’re only using me for my notes, you literally never listen in class! Can you get my back please?”
She hums while you turn around, her small hands kneading sunscreen from your shoulder bones to the small dip in your back. Jieun continues to blabber on about the joys of life, not even checking if you’re listening to a single word she says. Instead your eyes are zeroed in on a certain someone.
Your staring is blatantly obvious but you don’t care. It’s only when Taehyung spots your burning gaze with a small smirk does he signal Jungkook to turn around to meet your flirty grin.
Holy shit
The sun does a real great job of highlighting the gorgeous curves of your body adorned in quite possibly the smallest baby blue bikini he’s seen on a woman. Your breasts practically spill out of the tiny triangle cups and the pretty colour compliments your skin beautifully.
Whilst Jungkook can admit you have one of the hottest bodies he’s seen in a while, his eyes surprisingly don't linger on your delicious curves for too long. Instead, he finds himself utterly enamoured by the way your eyes crinkle slightly when you smile prettily at him, your cheeks glowing with it.
It suddenly dawns on him that you are the first girl that has truly enchanted him, and no, your ridiculously gorgeous body had little to do with it.
Jungkook does not mind this change one bit.
So, instead of staring at you like a gaping goldfish, he matches your flirtatious body language with a boyish grin and a small wave. His previous nerves dissipating only to be replaced by confidence and polished charm. He doesn’t want to scare you off with his sudden look of epiphany just yet, but the new unfamiliar feeling you give him is surely doing exactly that.
“My, my, Yoongi wasn’t lying.” Jieun stifles a giggle when she notices how Jungkook’s attention has steered towards you and only you. You’re quick to turn around, brows furrowed. “What are you on about?”
“Oh you know… You and Jungkook”
You grimace, tired of the repeated topic of conversation. “Just because I sucked his dick once does not mean we're a thing”
“Oh really? He’s asked me an awful lot of questions about you I was beginning to think otherwise”
“Wait, really?”
Jieun has the widest cheshire grin plastered on her face, it's starting to look quite unsettling.
“Really.”
You’re thoroughly shocked to say the least. You thought your fast, fleeting blowjob, sort of, was nothing special. A usual escapade to get his daily fill. Ordinary. Unmemorable.
However, it seems to be quite the opposite.
Jieun grabs your hand and swings it back and forth, exactly like a mother would do, although she’s merely two years older than you. “I know Jin’s been up your ass about Jungkook and frankly I don’t blame him he’s still a little shit from time to time but, he’s actually quite fun to be around and honestly I think his playboy tendencies seemed to dial down a bit since he met us.” The two of you giggle quietly amongst each other, quick feet making your way closer to the pool to avoid the scorching pavement.
Your toes are the first to dip into the pool and you practically moan at the cold water melting away the blistering haze that sticks onto your skin. The water is icy at your waist and you love it. “So my advice would be not to worry about him, instead it's his little army of plastic bimbos that you should watch out for.”
“Ahh, internalised misogyny. We love to see it.”
Jieun acknowledges you with a hum as the two of you float around the calming abyss. She then swims closer to you, nodding her head into the direction of a lonely Jungkook, who lazily stares at your alluring form. “I think your loverboy over there wants to talk to you.”
Jieun swims away before you can protest, leaving you to face the handsome man before you. His eyes are round and docile, yet his stare is tantalising, it pulls you in as if he’s slowly reeling you in with a rope.
The water delicately ripples around your body when you approach him and you internally sigh in awe at the striking features of his stunning face. You want to use this opportunity to finally get to know him, and perhaps form a new friendship.
You take note of the lack of Jin’s hawk-like eyes or for better the lack of any eyes on the two of you. You’re alone, huddled into one of the far corners of the pool, your conversation private, just for two pairs of ears.
You open your mouth to speak, “So-”
“I-”
An uncomfortable silence stills the air and you both halt your words to giggle quietly amongst yourselves. God, this is awkward.
“You go first”, You offer, tucking a wet strand of hair behind your ear. Jungkook follows the subtle movement of your fingers before taking a deep breath.
“I feel like we should discuss the elephant in the room”
You're stunned. “Huh?”
“You know… That Friday night?”
Of course you knew what he was referring too, yet you wondered why as you honestly didn’t think that night had much impact on the man.
With a raised brow you ask, “What about it?”
“I’ve just had a lot of... thoughts”
You scratch your head feeling puzzled. You’re sure Jungkook has had better blowjobs in his lifetime. Hell, Jungkook did most of the work that night. “Do you usually discuss the past hookups you have, or am I just lucky today?”
You’re teasing him, nevertheless Jungkook tilts his head back towards the sky. All he wants is clarification, only this conversation is heading down an awkward path, so he decides to spit out what’s been bothering him for the past few days.
“Okay listen, I know this is odd to say, but ever since that night, It’s like I can’t get you out of my head.”
Your ego inflates at his statement and you smirk. You knew you could suck dick well, but according to Jungkook you seem to have quite the talent.
You smile proudly, “damn, look at me go, I can’t believe I have the campus playboy wrapped around my finger.”
Jungkook scoffs, both in annoyance and embarrassment because shit, he could have worded that differently, now he sounds like the clingy girls he fucks.
“Yeah, yeah let’s not pretend like I was the only one enjoying myself here. Weren’t you the one practically begging to be touched?”
You’re amused. “Weren’t you the one who couldn’t make me cum. Yet came from their own handjob?”
Jungkook tongues his cheek and looks away. The way you speak so casually intimidates him. No girl has ever spoken to him this way, in fact, Jungkook’s the one who usually likes to tease. He can slowly feel the creeping heat alighting his cheeks and God does he hope you don’t notice.
You patiently wait for Jungkook’s reply, a sly grin adorned on your pretty face. However, Jungkook doesn’t say anything, rather he frowns and immaturely splashes water at your face.
“Jungkook!” You sputter, wiping at your face to rid of the chlorine in your eyes. “What the fuck was that for?”
He shrugs, “sorry my hand must’ve slipped”
You don’t take that for an answer, your petty nature crawling out as you splash him back harder than he had done. “Hand slipped, my ass.”
You cross your arms smugly, a small laugh blossoming out of your mouth when Jungkook cutely rubs at his eyes.
It’s after a minute when you realise Jungkook hasn’t stopped furiously rubbing his eyes. The circular motions of his hand move so intensely that it begins to look painful and irritating. “Fuck, it stings”, he exclaims in agony.
Shit, you inwardly curse, gently touching his wrist, concern lacing your features because you didn’t think getting chlorinated water in one's eye would sting that much. You analyse his facial expressions closely and you wince at the redness surrounding his eyes from his harsh rubbing.
On the contrary, Jungkook knows exactly what he’s doing. He’s competitive and won’t back down from a fight, even if it’s just fun banter, so he continues his little scheme just for the fun of it and hides his small grin under his large hands.
You’re now slightly panicked, “fuck, Jungkook I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to hit the water that hard I-”
Jungkook cracks.
Ever so slowly, he peeps his eyes out at you and watches with a mischievous smirk as your face morphs from alarmed to annoyed in less than a millisecond.
You tighten your grip on his wrist and attempt to slap his hard chest with your free hand, however Jungkook’s reflexes are fast and he grasps your hand tightly, a teasing glint in his eye.
“You little shit-”
All of a sudden a loud holler is heard from the front door, rousing a relaxed Jin out of his chair as he sprints while simultaneously yelling at the ruckus being made. It’s then a stampede of both familiar and unfamiliar faces come crashing in. Some jump straight into the pool to cool off from the blazing sun while others rush to the table of assorted alcohol, desperate to get an ounce of it in their system.
Word seemed to go around about Jin’s supposed small get-together unbelievably fast, causing the once tranquil Kim Seokjin into a raging volcano.
You’re pressed right up against Jungkook’s solid chest and he surprisingly pays you no mind, even though your perky tits are deliciously pushed up perfectly against his body. Jungkook’s eyes are not settled on them, rather he pays close attention to the amount of people dangerously plunging into the pool at a fast rate.
Jungkook protectively hugs your shoulders to shield you from the rowdy party goers who definitely do not understand the definition of personal space. Your heart swells when he then delicately places your head in the crook of his neck and wraps an arm around your fairly exposed body, essentially guarding you from frantic wet limbs and ignorant individuals.
You feel comfortable and safe, so comfortable that you wouldn’t mind staying like this for a while if it weren’t for the throng of college students delving into the cooling water.
Jin’s house begins to fill with unexpected guests very quickly and you wonder how Jin is handling the situation. You suppose not very well when you see him whipping people with towels, red ears making an appearance and his booming voice following him.
Jungkook wants to get out and he’s sure you feel the same way which is why he smoothly slots his hand into your own, long fingers wrapping around your hand to carefully pull you through the growing crowd of people in the pool.
Whilst pushing past a variety of college students you are met with many stares, even worse, numerous envious eyes and whispers of possible gossip. You try your best to avoid their gazes, the hard stares reminding you of the last time Jungkook held your hand to push through groups of people.
Water drips down the curves of your body and lands in little pools around you when you step out of the pool. At this point you’ve garnered even more turning heads that examine every inch of your skin closely. Their stares itch your skin and you feel akin to an animal kept in a zoo enclosure, curious eyes breaking down your confidence, you want to hide.
You usually like to pride yourself on your confidence because you know you’re hot and you know your worth. It had taken many failed relationships to build up your self love and nourish the scars and memories of questioning if you’re good enough.
You fight on and squeeze Jungkook’s hand, mostly for some sort of reassurance. It shocks you when he astonishingly squeezes back and softly rubs his thumb over the back of your hand. It’s almost as if he knows how you’re feeling.
You glance up at him shyly. Jungkook keeps his eyes straight ahead. He smiles a different kind of smile than the one he had directed to you a few hours ago. His lips are in a permanent smug smirk. His usual playboy smile. He flashes it at everyone as if he’s asking for their approval and even goes in to high-five a few people who are unrecognisable to you. You soon realise that this is what Jungkook thrives on. People, validation and his notorious reputation he’s created for himself.
Jungkook lights up at the presence of crowds, flirty smiles and people calling his name, whereas you want to crawl into your skin and run away because from the perspective of outsiders it looks like you’re just another one of Jungkook’s flings that will soon be forgotten by next week.
Well, you hope you won’t turn out to be one of them.
At last you find yourself away from the heart of the party, your dress in hand but your body still wet nonetheless. Jungkook is in the same state as yourself, droplets of water dribbling from his dark hair and onto the timber flooring. He leans into your ear, “I’ll go get us some towels, stay here.”
He’s gone before you can reply, making small conversation when he passes by various people, his boisterous laugh echoing down the halls.
You’re alone now, and defenceless at that. There’s not many people you know here, besides the few odd people you share a class with and some sleazy frat boys that hold a similar reputation to Jungkook. You want to find Jieun so you can hug her or maybe ask her if she can take you home, but she is nowhere to be found.
Fuck, You remember leaving your bag on the kitchen table, unsupervised with many personal belongings stowed away inside. Using your dress to cover the most of your exposed skin like a blanket, you stride over to the kitchen and sigh in relief when you find your bag untouched and in perfect condition.
Snatching up your bag, you grab your phone and immediately text Jieun to find out where the fuck she’s hiding, but there’s a part of you that knows she’s probably fucking Yoongi somewhere. Traitor.
Jungkook finds you to be in a completely different part of the house than where he asked you, one towel wrapped around his neck and the other draped over his arm. You haven’t noticed him yet, your frantic fingers texting a treacherous Jieun, “princess, didn’t I tell you to stay put?”
You’re startled. Switching your phone off you stick your arm out, waiting for Jungkook to pass you the towel but he doesn't. Jungkook gently pushes your shoulders so that you turn away from him and carefully wraps the towel around your body like a cape. You hold the edges of the fabric to help him hug the towel around yourself, keeping it tighter to your body.
Your voice is quiet, “thank you.”
Jungkook leans down to meet your face, “What was that?”
Even though Jungkook had been in the pool longer than you, his cologne still sticks to his skin and you kind of want to breathe more of it in, but that would be weird.
“Oh, I said thank you.”
You’re close to him again, although this time he towers over you with a look almost identical to a predator meeting its prey.
Jungkook’s eyes flirt around your face and descend. He shamelessly drinks up the swell of your breasts and whatever skin is visible amidst the fluffy towel around you. It’s strange. You had noticed Jungkook doing the exact same thing when you were alone with him. The difference though was that his looks were cursory as if he didn’t want to make you uncomfortable. Now, It's like a new persona had taken over him and he was ready to pounce at any sign of a green light.
He’s stuck in a trance, fuckboy tinted glasses fogging his vision.
You force out a giggle and playfully shove his shoulder, “my eyes are up here, you know.”
His reply comes lighting fast, he’s definitely been in this position before. “I know, just admiring them.”
Jungkook wants to hit himself the second his reply spewed out of his mouth. He desperately wants to reassure your unimpressed (though also very cute) face, because goddammit he wanted to be respectful. Jungkook knows he has a tendency to slip into a new personality when the right amount of people hyped him. Call it being two faced, he knows it's one of his fatal flaws.
“I'm sorry.”
He says it genuinely.
Jungkook only just got to properly meet you, he doesn’t want to give you the wrong impression! He can admit, your first ever official meeting (moreso hookup) wasn’t ideal, yet the way Jin dragged him through the mud undoubtedly made him understand that you weren’t the type of woman that should ever undergo the treatment he puts his hookups through. Scratch that, any woman shouldn’t be treated the way Jungkook treats them.
You're now fully covered under the towel, not a sliver of skin on display. You don’t know if his apology was genuine. “It’s ok I guess, I expected nothing less from you anyways.”
“Right.” He’s messed up.
You clear your throat, “I’m gonna go get changed, maybe look for Jieun unless-”
Jungkook finishes your sentence, “-she’s fucking Yoongi.”
You exhale, “yeah.”
“Jeon Jungkook!”
The voice makes you halt at its familiar tone. Jungkook doesn’t notice your growing panic as he too freezes in his spot.
No, it can’t be.
The world plays in slow motion when he walks into your line of vision. His assertive stride, smug smile and sharp eyes.
Jeong Suho.
His name explodes inside of you like a blistering fire yet your heart feels ice cold. He is the very man you have spent weeks trying to avoid and even more trying to get out of your head.
The world plays at a normal speed when he approaches Jungkook. Their facial expressions are the same, the way they greet each other is the same. They’re practically the same breed of fuckboy, born from the same mother.
“Been awhile since I’ve seen you around.”
Jeong Suho was a person that Jungkook didn’t really mind, In fact there was a point in Jungkook’s life where he would’ve considered Suho to be one of his closest friends. They were two peas in a pod freshmen year of college. Never giving a fuck about their education and always present for any opportunity to get completely wasted with as many girls they could possibly seduce. Nowadays, Jungkook would rather keep his distance from him.
On the contrary, you were one of the many girls that had fallen deeply for Suho’s alluring charm. You fell so hard, you thought that maybe just maybe there was a possibility that you could secure a future with him. Obviously that was not the case.
You thank your lucky stars that Jungkook was there to distract Suho while you make your haste escape. All you need to do now is somehow locate an unoccupied bathroom, preferably without having to walk in on someone getting it on, and then you could get the hell out of there.
You must admit, you look quite ridiculous right now. Navy blue towel wrapped tightly around your body, your small head peeking through. You could probably pass as some form of E.T cosplay right now. You don’t care if you look rude, pushing and shoving whoever stands in your way. You only have one goal and you’re so so close to succeeding-
“Wait, Y/N! Is that you?”
Fuck.
Do you run? Maybe duck behind some poor innocent student looking for a good time? You huff, you're already sticking out like a sore thumb, there’s no use in trying to hide when the enemy has already spotted you. Even worse Jungkook motions you over with a wide gleaming smile. If only he knew how much you’re dreading this interaction.
Grudgingly, you walk over, looking like an irritated gremlin with your towel still firmly secured around you. Jungkook makes matters worse by pushing the towel off your head, releasing your scruffy ball of hair. You grimace.
“I didn’t know you knew Y/N?”
Suho sends a smirk your way. You however, glower.
“Yeah we go way back, don’t we baby?”
You force a tight lipped smile, howbeit you look as if you have a mild case of constipation.
“Sure.” It comes out rough through gritted teeth.
Suho notes your frustration, a sly grin carving onto his punchable face. He turns towards Jungkook, seemingly blocking you from their conversation, yet you know Suho wants you to hear what he has to say.
“You know it’s a shame. Y/N’s gorgeous, ten outta ten body, knows how to put it to good use, however she never let me fuck her. Don’t you think that’s weird?”
Jungkook stays silent for a minute, eyeing your shaking fists and angry eyebrows. Jungkook may be dumb, but he sure knows how to read a room, thus leading him to the conclusion that your relationship with Suho isn’t something you’re very fond of and that he should probably get you out of here.
“Uhhh no, that’s not weird at all actually. What I think is weird is the fact that you think you have this sick claim on every girl you’ve defiled and even worse, you’ve always had this strange need to chase after every virgin you see like some perverted cherry picker. Yeah, that’s weird.”
Suho laughs right in his face, spit grossly tickling his skin. “That’s rich coming from you Jeon, weren't you quite the cherry picker in your freshman days, no?”
Jungkook doesn’t know what he expected from this conversation. It definitely wasn’t this.
It's obvious that Jungkook isn’t a saint, he really fucking far from it. Although, one thing's for sure, it’s his absolute hatred for the way his brain was wired in his freshman year of college. Yes, Jungkook still remains as one of the standing campus fuckboys but he’s gained a few more brain cells since then.
Jungkook opens his mouth to retort, only to be met with Suho’s back as he turns his attention towards you.
“Y/N, darling if I were you i’d make a run for it, ya know keep your chastity intact or whatever.” His smile is saccharine sweet, though his words are sickly sour.
The months of pent up anger stored within your being bubbles and overflows like a bad science experiment. You’ve quickly decided that now’s that time to expose the shitty excuse of a man, and quite frankly you don’t care that you have an audience. Actually, an audience would make this all the better.
Your finger is strong, pointing accusingly at his broad chest. “You know what you stupid motherfucker? Don’t waltz in here with that dumb smile of yours when you know you have some disgusting cheesy infection growing down there.”
Suho’s eyes widen slightly. It was no secret he was a walking STD, just about infecting every girl that was naive enough to sit on his dick.
Everyone at the party has definitely stopped to listen to what you have to say. You even spot Jin from the corner of your eye sending you a proud smile. “And while we're on the topic of cheese, Learn how to wash your fucking dick!”
You don’t let him have a moment to speak, grabbing Jungkook’s hand and pulling him out of the house.
A few people applaud, some girls praise you on your way out. You give them no mind, you’ve had enough for tonight.
Jungkook starts his car, no questions asked. It’s obvious to him that there’s bad blood between you and Suho. What you don’t know is that Jungkook can also relate.
Technically there was no bad blood between them, moreso the hurtful memories and manipulation Suho put him through. To put it simply, Suho was probably the worst influence Jungkook could ever have as a vunerable freshman.
The crunch of gravel and soft melodies that spill out of Jungkook’s radio converse with eachother and fill the defeaning silence that sits between you and Jungkook.
Jungkook doesn’t even know where he’s going, he just drives.
Every so often he checks up on you from the corner of his eye. Your knees stick tightly together and point away from him. Your fingers curl and uncurl, leaving cresent moons in your skin. And to finish it off, your face remains still, hostility completely washing over your features. If Jungkook didn’t know any better he would think you’d jump out of his car and make a run for it at the chance of him stopping the car.
It’s seven sniffles later when Jungkook decides he knows where he should take you.
The night sky is clear and the stars burn brightly to accompany the full round moon. It’s the perfect setting for release and maybe a screaming session if you’re up for it.
Jungkook makes a stop behind a forest of tall trees and a dirt path. You sit up immediately.
“Where are we?” Your eyes are rimmed with tears, “I want to go home.”
Jungkook shuts the engine off, “you never told me where you live.”
“Well you never asked!”
Maybe you shouldn’t have yelled because from the looks of it, Jungkook just wants to help you out and clearly you’re not being the friendliest right now.
You curl back into yourself, “sorry”, another sniffle.
Jungkook brings your fists into his hands and warmly opens them up. You refuse to look at him, it doesn’t deter Jungkook one bit.
Tenderly he brings a finger under your chin, gradually bringing your eyes up to his. Jungkook takes his time with you, careful to not set you off until you’re face to face with his warm eyes.
“I brought you here because it’s apparent we both need let out some pent up steam.” He drags his fingers delicately across the curve of your chin and back into his lap. His touch is fleeting, you miss it already. “I just thought you may want to vent or just shout out into the void, it’s up to you.” You nod, fully trusting Jungkook’s intentions. “And at any time you feel like going home just say the word and I’ll take you there, okay?”
Your heart swells in adoration at his caring nature, though you can’t help but wonder how he can have such a sudden change in personality depending on where he is and who he’s with. It’s unnerving.
Jungkook clicks his seatbelt off and heads out the car, “put your dress back on princess, I’ll be out here waiting for you.” You mutter your confirmation and do as he asks.
The cool summer air kisses your skin and runs through your hair as you step out of the car. Jungkook is already by your side dressed in an oversize hoodie with another in his hand as well as a fuzzy blanket.
Jungkook steps closer to you, holding the hem of his hoodie to slip over your body. Without a second thought you raise your hands causing Jungkook to chuckle at how cute you look dwarfed in his clothes.
The same cologne you smelled on his skin earlier lingers on every fibre of fabric around you. His scent is everywhere, swirling around your head, instantly calming down your anxieties. You smile at him, “Lead the way Jungkook.”
Jungkook leads you up a small hill and you notice the trees opening up to display a lush field of grass. However, the sight before you leaves you in absolute wonder. You stand completely still and take it all in.
The night sky is dark but the city below illuminates is beautifully. Your gaze bounces over all the buildings, skyscrapers and their dazzling bright lights. It’s peaceful up here, you decide as you take a glimpse of the hundreds of tall structures looking so tiny, so ant-like.
Jungkook is settled behind you, his legs comfortably folded underneath himself. He remembers what it was like the first time he saw the view, which is why he doesn’t blame your stunned silence and glazed eyes.
“How did you find this place?”
You find your way towards Jungkook and plant yourself right beside him. “I don’t know, I was just driving aimlessly one night and found it, It’s nice right.”
You hum, “it’s beautiful.”
Jungkook murmurs in agreement as you lie down on the woolly blanket beneath you. The stars twinkle and glimmer amongst the deep blue sky, creating a serene experience. You shut your eyes.
“I hate him.”
Jungkook looks down at you, you don’t see him though. “Suho?”
“Yeah”, you exhale deeply, “I can’t believe I had to see him again.”
Although Jungkook knows you can’t see him, he swivels his body around to face you properly. “Did you guys date or something?”
You scoff, “pffft you know Suho doesn’t date anyone.” You open your eyes, meeting a pair of round docile ones. You continue, “Suho was the first guy who every gave me an ounce of attention. Before him guys never looked my way. Jungkook remains silent, letting you pour out what’s on your mind.
“Suho had me fooled, I thought I was special to him, thought he saw something in me that was different from the others. Turns out that was his game after all”
You speak so animatedly, your hands wave around in the air, your eyebrows scrunch when the memories come back to you. “It’s stupid really, how I used to gush to him about finding the one person in the universe that was created just for me. I guess he used this as my weak point.”
Inhale, exhale.
“He made me believe he was that special person for me, used it as an excuse to pressure me into sex.” A tear rolls down the side of your face, falling perfectly in a straight line. “I almost gave in, but something just felt so wrong. Every time I said no he would call me terrible names, tell me that no one would want me if I never gave them what they wanted. And I believed him.”
Another tear escapes your wet orbs, Jungkook is there to wipe it this time.
“I broke it off after I found out he fucked my roommate and gave her some disease.” You chuckle, “I guess I’m lucky I never let him fuck me huh?”
Jungkook’s heart breaks at your saddened eyes and the way Suho treated you, he sweeps a stray hair out of you face. “I think you dodged a bullet there princess, what he did to you was pure evil, no one, and especially you don’t deserve that”
You sit up, wiping remaining tears and thanking him as you go, “It’s your turn now.” You pat his thigh, “tell me why Suho got you so riled up tonight.”
Jungkook shuffles in his spot, “It’s actually kind of similar to you.”
You gasp sarcastically, “no way he pressured you into sex too?”
He laughs, eyes squeezing shut, “No, no, nothing like that.”
You lean closer to Jungkook, giving him the same attention he had given you. “My father left when my mother found out she was pregnant with me, so growing up I had no male figure present in my life. My mother stopped at nothing to give me that to the point that almost every week I’d wake up and see a new man drinking out of my favourite mug. I didn’t mind it because I was only a child and some part of me always hoped they would stay, but they never did.”
“My mom was a hopeless romantic. She held so much sentimental and idealistic views on love that it stuck to me. She always told me that there was someone special out there just for me.” You smile at the similar belief, Jungkook sighs.
“Cut to college, Suho was the first friend I made. I had no experience with girls whatsoever, and I still held on to my mother’s faith. Whenever I talked to Suho about it he would always shut me down or make fun of me.”
“He told me that all my feelings are bullshit, and that I only felt that way because I’ve never hooked up with anyone before. Next thing I knew we were going to parties every week getting absolutely shitfaced and fucking every girl I laid eyes on.”
You nod, listening intently. “And tonight, he hit a nerve. What he said made me realise that I’m just as bad as him. He moulded me into this person and now I have a reputation.”
Jungkook’s eyes drop, “he broke my concept of love before I even got to experience it.”
You never knew Jungkook was in a place like this. You always thought he was like Suho, built to break hearts and show no emotion when it came to love. Jungkook was nothing like that. His heart was truly big, desperately longing for someone.
Placing your hand on top of his own you comfort him as best as you can, “oh, Jungkook, trust me when I tell you this, the love in your heart is not broken. Think about it, most people you’ve met have been through college right?” He nods, “there are so many other people out there that you’ve never met, soon you’ll be able to find that someone and learn how to love. I know you present yourself as this emotionless playboy, but once you let that part of you go it’ll feel so freeing.”
Jungkook stares deeply into your eyes, he’s so thankful that he decided to bring you here, he can’t contain his happiness.
“Can I like, hug you?” Jungkook asks shyly. You smile, and it’s so big and bright Jungkook might as well be staring at the sun. Before he knows it, you’re tackling him into the most wholesome hug he’s ever had. You’re warm and you smell like vanilla, It feels like home.
“Get up”, he says abruptly, extending his arm to pull up your confused self.
“What-”, Jungkook cuts you off, “have you ever just let yourself scream?”
Jungkook has intertwined your hands together, and your heart pounds at the realisation of how well they fit together. “Well, no but I assume that’s what we’re about to do right now.”
He pulls you closer to the edge of the small hill, the view of the city sparkles right in front of you. “On the count of three, one- two- three!”
You scream, you let it all out and God does it feel refreshing.
The two of you sound utterly insane, but none you give a single fuck. You scream until your lungs burn and your throat itches you to stop.
The volume of both of your voices ring out into the night sky only for the moon, stars and yourselves. The night is still young but Jungkook wouldn’t have it any other way.
With you he lets go of everything, all the past mistakes, all the hurt because at this moment he feels like he could fly, soar into the clouds.
He feels infinite.
Taglist <3
@zibermuda @uskookie @jeonscandies @melaninkpops @apollukee @hollowtree10 @liliskies @madygswich @pjmochii @eggbutnotyolk @gyukult @yukiehyukie @purplepearl07 (couldn’t tag) @tae165 @youurkryptonite @94ser0da @french-myfries @zippytheshark37 (couldn’t tag) @we8joon @tearvantae @emrysts @inspinkyring
#ficswithluv#h0neypjm#mine#jungkook#Jungkook Fanfiction#jungkook smut#bts#bts fanfiction#jungkook x reader#bts x reader#jimin#taehyung#hoseok#seokjin#yoongi#namjoon
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what a tease // colby brock
A/N: so... this fic kinda came out of nowhere. no one requested it. i just thought of it last night and had to get it out. it was a lot of fun to write, and hopefully doesn’t read as too awkward haha let me know what you think.
prompt: colby has always been the dominant one in the relationship, and you were fine with that. but then one night, you get to take control. || fem!reader x colby
trigger warning: pure fucking smut, like literally porn, handcuffs, vibrator usage, lingerie, cursing, unprotected sex
word count: 2767
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
It all started with a suggestion. An idea you had.
You and Colby had been together for almost a year now, and your sex lives were fantastic. Colby knew exactly what to do to get you off, to give you everything you wanted and more. And you knew exactly what to do to make Colby go crazy. You had never met a man that wanted to give you pleasure as much as Colby did. And you loved making Colby lose it; something about the way he looked as he pounded into you made you instantly wet any time you thought about it.
You worked perfectly together because Colby was dominant and commanding, and you just loved submitting to everything he asked for, with some occasional teasing of course.
But secretly, you always loved the idea of being the dominant one. Before you guys had ever dated, you had had dreams of him begging to fuck you, pleading with you to let him taste you for even just a second. It was always in the back of your mind because Colby didn't really show that side of himself. You would see it sporadically, like when you would take too long to let his cock slide inside you, a slight whine leaving his lips; or even when you would slowly ease yourself down on him with your mouth, knowing damn well he was ready to bust at any second.
So, one night you brought it up to him. You asked him very nonchalantly about it, about the idea of him allowing you to be in 100% control. And at first, he was a bit hesitant, thrown off by your notion. But he sat there as you guys continued to watch a movie, and by the end, he said he wouldn't mind it once. You both agreed that when he was ready for it, he would let you know.
And so, you waited. And waited. It wasn't like you needed to dominate him, but the thought was growing more and more in your mind. What would you do? How would you tease him? And most importantly, what would you wear?
Then finally, he agreed. One night randomly, he said he was ready for you to dominate him. He blushed at the words, his dimples appearing as he laughed through the sentence. It felt a little weird on his end to say it, even though it was something you had said before on several occasions. But he was ready for you. He was ready to see what you would do to him.
Or... at least he thought he was.
Colby leaned back against his headboard, waiting for you to come out of the bathroom. He was excited to see what you were wearing, even if he was planning to take it off in a matter of minutes.
You glanced at yourself in the mirror one more time, taking in your appearance with a deep breath. You had thought to buy a red and black lingerie set, knowing that that combo was sexy, but something about this white number that you had on made you feel like a porn star. The bra hugged your breasts in the best way, the lace delicately tracing your curves. The thong and garter belt, uncomfortable as it sort of was, made you feel like throwing money at yourself. You tugged at your thigh highs, feeling them stretch a little more up your thigh. Your heels clicked on the floor as you shuffled, your eyes following your hips as they moved back and forth. You clicked your tongue, nodded to yourself, and walked out of Colby's bathroom.
His head immediately shot up as you stepped out. His eyes raked over your body, taking in every beautiful inch of your skin. His lips twitched, a little smirk hiding in the corner of his mouth.
"Fuck babe, when did you get that?" He asked, his voice deeper than usual.
"I ordered this a while ago. Figured tonight would be the perfect time to pull it out." You stated, sliding slowly onto his bed.
"Well, I'm happy you're finally putting it to good use," Colby pulled your hips to his, your body resting against his lap. He glided his hands up to your bra straps, "Too bad it's gonna have to come off now."
You smacked his hands away. "Not so fast, love. Remember, I get to decide what happens tonight."
He sighed, playfully rolling his eyes. "Right, right. What exactly do you have in store for me?"
"Well for starters, we're gonna need these." You reached over into Colby's drawer and pulled out a pair of red, fluffy handcuffs.
Colby batted his eyelashes. "I thought those were only for you."
"Nope. You see, this pair is for you. I got you a red pair to match my black." You replied.
"We're gonna have to replace yours though, you know," Colby whispered, getting close to your face. "Since we almost broke them the last time we used them..."
"That's enough from you." You shushed, grabbing Colby's wrist lightly and slipping the handcuff around it. You tightened it slowly, pulling it around his back and connecting the other handcuff to his empty wrist.
"Cole Robert Brock, you're under arrest." You joked, holding back a giggle.
He sighed. "You're enjoying this a little too much."
"You have no idea." You beamed.
Colby shimmied his body down a bit, getting more comfortable. He fidgeted his wrist against the handcuffs, feeling the fluff tickle against his inner wrist. The handcuffs were secure in a way he wasn't expecting.
You slowly straddled Colby's lap, his legs resting down onto the bed under your weight. You leaned in, ready to place your lips on his, but stopped abruptly. "What's your safe word?"
He scrunched up his face. "Safe word?"
You nodded. "Yeah. In case it becomes too much."
"I know what a safe word is, babe," He deadpanned lightly. "Um... pineapple."
"Perfect." You muttered, finally connecting your lips to his. The kiss was slow and sweet, a light breath leaving your mouth as Colby glided his tongue in passed your lips. As your tongues danced together, your hands found his hair, gently pulling on his purple locks. You pulled your mouth away, peppering his jaw with kisses. Your mouth traced down his neck, kissing and sucking until you reached his collarbone. You lightly bit his skin, a hum falling from his lips.
"I want to keep kissing you." He mumbled.
You shrugged subtly. "Too bad."
Hands falling to his thighs, you kissed down his chest; pecking his heart tattoo along the way. You couldn't stop yourself from running your tongue across his nipples. The quiet gasp from him made you chuckle to yourself. As you snaked your lips further and further down, you could see him hardening in his boxers. You picked your head up last second, your hands wandering up his inner thigh. You fingers traced his bulge, his breath hitching and eyes closing.
"Baby..." He inhaled.
You blinked. "Yes?"
He looked into your eyes. "Don't tease me."
"Oh, Colby. You haven't even seen me tease you yet," You smiled sweetly. "But I'll be nice for right now. Hold yourself up for a second."
Colby picked up his hips and you removed his boxers, allowing his cock to spring free. You tossed his underwear onto the floor, wrapping your hand around his shaft. His tip was already leaking a small amount of precum as you jerked him off agonizingly slow.
He grunted as he bucked his hips into your hand, needing more of your touch. You kept your pace the same, gazing up at him longingly.
"Y/N... go faster." Colby blurted.
You sped up gently, rubbing his tip with every stroke. You could see his shoulders tense, wanting to be out of the handcuffs.
"Do you want me blow you?" You questioned, your voice low.
He nodded, humming.
"Then say it." You commanded.
Colby bit his tongue, his eyes narrowing for a second. "Really?"
"Really." You straight-faced.
Your thumb circled his leaking head as you waited for him to speak. His hips twitched against your hand as he choked back a moan.
"Suck me, Y/N." He grunted.
You raised an eyebrow at his tone, but eased your head down. As his cock entered your mouth, he exhaled deeply. You bobbed your head up and down, taking him in as much as you could and jerking off the rest with your hand. You hollowed out your cheeks as you reached his tip, swirling your tongue around him. Colby's head fell back against the headboard, soft noises falling from his lips. You continued to suck, allowing his cock to get deeper and deeper into your mouth. A guttural groan ripped through him once his head hit the back of your throat.
"Fuck, I wish I could grab your hair." He shook against his restraints.
As you sped up your movements, a light sheen of sweat trickled across his skin and yours. You gripped his hips, holding him back from throat-fucking you. You could tell he was getting close, knowing how much he would love to come in your mouth at any moment. You pulled your mouth away with a pop, and Colby hissed.
"Baby, fuuuck. Why'd you stopped?" He shuddered.
You looked him dead in the eyes. "I get to decide when you come."
He scoffed, coughing out a laugh. "I swear, when I get my hands out of these..."
"Well, that's not happening anytime soon. So, you might as well enjoy the show." You snickered.
You went back into Colby's drawer, pulling out a small, light purple toy. You rested yourself back against some pillows, your legs pointed towards Colby.
He huffed. "What's that?"
"Something I use when you're not around. Do you realize how many trips you go on? I get very lonely." You relaxed against the pillows, spreading your legs.
Colby's mouth dropped open slightly. "Y/N... w-what-"
You cut him off, your voice just above a whisper. "You get to sit there and watch me touch myself. And you can't do anything about it."
You could hear the handcuffs jingle as he tried to escape them. He groaned, letting out a deep breath.
"Stop trying to get out of them," You ordered. "If you're good, maybe I'll unlock them."
Colby stayed quiet, surprised by your words. He loved seeing this side of you, this bold side that usually only came out when you were desperate and needing him. But seeing you lying there, slowly sliding your thong down your legs, taking your time to pleasure yourself and him, caused his cock to twitch hard against his stomach.
"You're already wet." His jaw clenched, staring down at your pussy.
"Of course. Sucking your cock always turns me on." You confessed.
He gulped. "Really?"
"Oh yeah. I love tasting you, and when your hands pull on my hair and force my head down, oh my God..." You cupped your right breast tenderly, arousing your nipple through the bra. You sunk your other hand down your body, turning your vibrator on. You watched Colby's eyes as they waltzed across your skin, watching the way you teased yourself, letting the toy touch your entrance, but never sliding in.
"I wanna taste you so badly, Y/N." Colby uttered, his eyes intense.
You tsked, snapping your bra open from the front and palming your other breast. "I wish you could. But you're not allowed to."
"Fuck, Y/N. I'm gonna break these fucking handcuffs." He growled, puffing his chest out.
You shook your head, popping up for a second. "No, you're not. You'll get to touch me eventually. I just wanna have some fun."
You slowly inserted the vibrator, whining at the sensation. You felt your eyes roll back into your head, your body falling back down onto the mattress as you dug your heels in. Your back arched as you dived the vibrator deeper.
"Fuuuck, Colby." You moaned. Your mischievous eyes opened and stared at Colby, who darkly glared back at you.
"The second you uncuff me, I'm gonna make you scream." He shoved his shoulders forward, narrowing his gaze more.
You let the vibrator touch your aching clit, the shockwave sending jolts of pleasure throughout your body. You drifted the vibrator back into you, speeding up your thrusts.
Your voice dripped with wanton. "As fantastic as this is, you feel so much better, Colby."
"Y/N..." He closed his eyes tightly.
"I mean it, love." You sped up more, peering through your lashes, "You are one of the only guys to ever make me feel this good. No man has ever made me hornier than you."
Colby bit his lip, pushing his head back. "Baby, please."
"You always make me come. And you always make me feel so sexy. I literally crave to feel you inside of me." You whimpered out the last few words, almost unable to finish your sentence because of the pleasure.
"Fuck, Y/N!" He gasped, tearing his gaze away from you.
You rolled your head back against the pillows, enjoying Colby's sounds. "Oh my God, Colby. This feels so good!"
Your hips bucked against the vibrator, taking more and more of it into you. You could feel yourself getting close, the muscles in your stomach tighten with each movement of your hand.
Your eyes locked. "Do you wanna touch me?"
Colby nodded feverously. "Yes."
"Say it then." You insisted breathlessly.
“I wanna touch you, baby.” He whined, furrowing his brows.
“What do you wanna do to me?” You taunted.
“I want to fuck you so hard, you can't walk straight.” Colby snapped, his voice hoarse.
You felt your juices slick down your lips from his words. "Do you want the handcuffs off?"
“Yesss.” He hissed.
“Beg for it.” You barked, your tongue sharp.
He stammered, wheezing. “F-fuck, baby, please take them off.”
You smirked. “I don't know...”
“Y/N, please. I need to touch you. Please, love.” Colby panted, pulling at his restraints.
“I'm so close, Colby.” You murmured innocently, “Do you want me to touch you?”
“Oh my God, Y/N, yes! I need some relief, please.” He begged, bucking his hips against the air.
You stared at his cock, leaking with precum and pulsating. The head was red and throbbing, aching to be touched for even a second. You felt your pussy clench around the vibrator. You did that to him, and you barely even touched him. He was ready to explode just from the look of you.
You were That. Fucking. Bitch.
Slipping the vibrator out of yourself, you got to your knees quickly, crawling over to Colby. His chest heaved as you straddled him once again, lining his tip up with your hole. You sunk down, your groans mixing together as his cock filled you up perfectly.
“Baby, please move. I'm not gonna last long.” Colby urged, his hips jerking.
You began to bounce on him, your high already so close. You needed him just as much as he needed you. You clutched his shoulders, burying your face into his neck. You sucked on his skin as he moaned in your ear.
He nipped at your shoulder. “Fuck, faster. Go faster Y/N. I’m so close.”
“You feel so good, Colby. Oh my God, I’m right there!” You yelled.
You thrusted faster and faster, your hips slamming into his over and over again. You couldn’t handle anymore, the sensations becoming too much. As your peak hit, you heard the snapping of metal as Colby’s voice boomed out a breath. You gasped loudly as Colby enveloped your body with his arms. He slammed your body onto the bed, jackhammering into your cunt rapidly as you rode out your orgasm.
Your legs gripped his hips firmly, diving him deeper into you. His cock pounded your g-spot repeatedly, and suddenly you were building up again in a matter of seconds. You writhed under him as another orgasm ravaged your body, unable to stop the noises that left your mouth. He came too, a throaty groan pouring from his lips.
You felt like you blacked out for a minute, the pleasure leaving your body completely numb. When you came to, Colby’s body rested on top of you, pressing you into the mattress.
He brushed the hair out of your eyes, the handcuff accidently tracing your face.
“Oh my G-God… you broke the handcuff.” You mentioned lazily.
He hummed, sucking his teeth. “I told you. I needed to touch you.”
You both chuckled, leaning in and pressing your sweaty foreheads together. He pecked your lips softly, sighing into the kiss.
#colby brock#colby brock x reader#colby brock smut#colby brock fanfiction#colby brock fanfic#colby brock fic
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living and reviving II
yep when I said three parts I think I meant 4 oops
summary: an overdue conversation that has to happen - like it or not
warnings: cheating, swearing, pregnancy talk, lots more angst, think thats it?
tomhollandxreader
/////////////////////// prev
So with a new sense of dread and fear and complete and total isolation you uttered three single words before hysterically running away.
“Don’t follow me.”
Not now, not ever.
That had been three weeks ago.
And it still fucking hurt like hell.
It had ended up that Yamna had taken you back to hers, where you had stayed for a couple nights. During that couple of days, Tom had tried. He had tried to apologise, tried to explain, tried to fix things. But it just wasn’t that easy.
Whatever he said, it didn’t take back from the fact that he had in that moment meant it. So no amount of sorrys could ever take that back.
After everyone had realised just how serious their situation was, Tom had moved out of your shared flat - so you could at least be in the place you were comfortable. Afterall the nursery was built in your flat and clearly it was you doing all the baby stuff for the moment. Thankfully Yamna, having been cut loose so without job, offered to move in with you. Which was probably the only thing keeping you going.
Well, that and ben and jerrys ‘phish food’. Honestly the shop must think you’re running some sort of ice cream black market at the rate you’re getting through their tubs.
Everyone kept parroting that it wasn’t good for the baby. Too much ice cream . Too much heavy lifting. Too much stress.
And yes, it probably was. But that was out of your control . The stress and lack of man in the household meant you had to do the heavy lifting of shopping from the car up the stairs. Shopping meaning ice cream, which you only depended on so much because of the stress.
It was a vicious cycle of hell.
Even Yamna, the person you were relying on keeping you sane had started walking on eggshells. It was as though you were literally about to pop, she always had to have at least half an eye on you. You were even banned from locking the toilet door - just in case.
It felt like you were a captive animal, people kept coming to observe you, giving sad looks before gleeing the scene.
You hadn’t been sleeping well either. Of course, being 3 weeks of your due date didn’t help - but neither did the lack of Tom. In fact, for the first time since shit had hit the fan, you had actually been managing to get some decent sleep when Yamna knocked on your bedroom door, quietly calling your name.
“I’m asleep” Groaning, you pulled the covers further over your head, praying to god that she’d leave you alone. But of course that wasn’t happening, she just lightly chuckled before you felt the bed dip - she had perched on the edge… Toms side.
“You never normally sleep talk.”
“I’m never normally this sleep deprived.” She sighed, whilst you still stubbornly kept your eyes closed.
“I’m sorry I woke you…. but this is important.”
“What?” Almost grunting, you threw the covers down looking up at her in anticipation. That was another thing about pregnancy - you were always on high alert, always worried.
“Toms here.”
“Tell him to f off.” Quickly you stopped caring about what your bestmate had to say.
“He’s saying that he’s the little ones dad and that he deserves to be involved and…. and I think I might agree.”
“I deserve a boyfriend who stays loyal to me so clearly neither of us are getting what we want.” You weren’t angry at Yamna and snapping at her wasn’t the answer. And yet you still did it.
“Y/n….I love you and I am completely on your side. I just think that maybe, perhaps, you should at least manage to be civil before baby arrives. Otherwise… thats going to be a lot to deal with all at once.”
It was your turn to sigh, deep and heavy (or at least as deep as the baby let). Most infuriatingly she was right. The conversation had to happen at some point. With a baby there too it would only be even more traumatic.
“He’s here now?” It only dawned on you how broken you actually sounded when the words croaked out of you.
“Yeh hunny… I didn’t let him inside so he’s standing outside the door looking like a dickhead right now.” The image cheered you up a little, enough to sit up in bed and be wrapped in Yamna’s arms. Her actions said it all, she really only meant the best for you and knew how hard this would be. After a moment she leant back. “I almost considered calling the paps so they could get a picture and label him as a groveling dick.”
“You should of.” Of course you didn’t mean it, but the answer had you both laughing. It took a minute to calm down before she changed subject slightly.
“You want me to make myself scarce? I can hide in my room or go to the shops or-“
“Text the guy from the bar - you deserve a night off ‘babysitting Y/n’ duties.”
“I’m not babys-“
“Yes you are. Go out with him and have some fun, I’ll be fine.”
“You sure?”
“Yeh”
That was a bare face lie - but Yamna had been almost too good to you. She really really needed a break. Especially as the current plan was she’d be helping with the newborn too. Right now you wouldn’t have wished a baby on yourself - never mind your best mate.
“Okay, get ready then babe - but do it slowly, leave him waiting outside in the cold for as long as possible.”
“Obviously.” You laughed, hauling yourself out of bed, where she gave you one more encouraging hug before leaving.
After hearing Yamna leave, and brushing your hair and throwing on a new pair of trakkies and hoodie, you slowly walked towards the door. It felt as though impending doom were on the other side and every fibre of you wanted to scream and run the other way. But it just had to happen at some point. Why not now?
With a final sharp exhale, attempting to pull yourself together, you opened the door. Immediately your heart sank, seeing nothing. Had you really been that long? And even so, was a 10 minute wait enough for him to give up? You could already feel the hormonal pregnancy tears starting to spring, when a grunt drew your attention.
What you hadn’t considered was the fact Tom was ready to camp out, sitting on the floor beside your door. Springing to his feet, he seemed shocked you’d actually opened the door - makes two of you. When Yamna left she had told him you were coming, but seeing really is believing.
“Y/n! I-I… I wasn’t sure you were ever going to answer.”
“You and me both.” You replied dryly, still leaning on the door. “Do you er…. do you want to come in?” Again he seemed shocked, as though he wasn’t sure you meant it.
“Is that-that okay?” Shrugging you just nodded, stepping back so he could get in. He did pay half the mortgage afterall.
“You want a drink?” He quickly declined your offer, not vocally but instead rushing past you to the kitchen and turning the kettle on himself.
“Your the pregnant one. Go chill on the sofa, I’ll bring you a cuppa.”
And a bit taken a back by his forcefulness you followed instructions, from the sofa watching how effortlessly he danced round the kitchen. It wasn’t shocking, it was technically his kitchen too. But seeing him there felt so alien, almost transporting you back to much much simpler times. Seemed a lifetime ago.
After a couple of minutes, he rounded the sofa with a hot chocolate in one hand for you (because caffiene is bad for the baby) and a cup of Yorkshire tea in the other.
“So… how have you been?”
“Ate a lot of ben and jerrys” You answered without really answering, except he knew you all too well.
“That bad?” He sighed, scrubbing a hand over his brow “how about the baby?”
“I don’t tend to carry an ultrasound on me but she’s been keeping me up all night kicking - so normal I guess.”
“Thats good” He spoke before realising what he said. “Sorry no I um-I don’t mean it like that!” You all but laughed in the face of his flusteredness, only making the tips of his ears go pinker.
“I assume you had something to say and that you came here for a reason rather than just pity me?”
“I want to make things right Y/n - I-I mean your having my kid.”
“OUR kid”
“ Exactly! And-and I love you too and-“
“Bullshit” You may have murmured it under your breath but you had intended for him to hear.
“Oh come one Y/n, you know that!”
It was like the man was asking to be yelled at.
“Don’t sit there trying to patronise me! I THOUGHT i knew it but then I saw you all over another girl. So yes, I’m calling bullshit.”
“Ugh I… If your not going to even try to hear me out then…”
“Then what Tom? You gonna kick me out. I mean this is your flat after all! Maybe you’d like to dump the mother of your unborn child homeless on the street and forget about us - how’d that sound? I’m sure your fans would blindly applaud you.”
“Listen! Please would you just listen to me.” His voice was loud and tone harsh, making you flinch a little. Not because you were ever worried he’d hurt you - but how this wave of uncomfort shuddered through your body, baby even squirming in discontent. So focused on that you just nodded, shifting back into the sofa.
Tom had noticed your reaction and seeing you seemingly scared of him like that, well it broke his heart. Even more.
“Sorry I didn’t mean to shout, I just…. I really need to try and fix this.” He leaned closer, letting out a thankful breath when you just nodded, as if to say go on.
“I’ve really really missed you… these past couple of weeks I’ve never felt so gulity in my life. Not because of what I did! Well yeh that but-but more how much it hurt you and-“
“Fuck.”
You couldn’t help but let out that little curse of pain as a new wave of pain, which seemed to originate from your lower back, shuddered through you. Tom looked up from where his eyes had been nervously wringing his palms whilst he spoke. Rubbing a hand over your belly you shook your head and motioned for him to continue.
She was just kicking really really hard. Right?
“Uhm yeh so I just wanted to properly tell you everything that happened that night so at least we are on the same page? A-And I’m not going to try and use this an excuse but I had been drinking so-“
Seemingly baby disliked the end of that sentence too, causing another rippling wave to echo through your body, feeling as though a band was pressing tightly round your stomach. With another small curse it forced you to stand up, in the hope that’d ease her. Clearly she was as done with his shit as you were.
“Need a water.” You muttered, already waddling to the kitchen, where you heard Tom follow you immediately - like an inpatient dog.
“Y/n sit down I can-“
He was silenced by you freezing and grabbing his arm tightly - a physical contact he hadn’t been expecting from you.
“Tom… get your phone.” You spoke slowly, still not having dared to have moved an inch - fingers almost white from how tightly you were squeezing his forearm.
“Wha-are you-are you okay?”
“I think my waters just broke. Get the phone. Now.”
~~~ feedback is really appreciated + would love to know what u think as still in the process of writing so can be guided / helped by asks !!! ~~~
taglist: @maraudersandco @@minejungwoo @sippin-on-tea @thegirlintheswivelchair @lovehollandy12 @hollandlover19 @thefernandasantana @hunnybunimdun @hallecarey1@cedricdiggorysimpp @msmimimerton @hollandfanficlove @pandaxnienke @crossyourpeter @thegirlwiththeimpala @tom-softie @sunwardsss @spiitfiiires @radcloudenthusiast @ladykxxx08 @prancerrparkerr @wildxwidow @arctic-monkcys @ownbauer13 @tomhollandlol @marvelsbitch8 @peterr-parkourr @lizzyclifford13-blog @user1683 @elishi03
#tom holland#tom holland imagine#tom holland fanfiction#tom holland angst#tom x reader#peter parkqueue#tom holland oneshot#tom holland x reader#tomholland#dad!tom#tom holland x y/n#tom holland x pregnant!reader#Tom Holland fluff#tom holland fluff
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- “get your son/daughter”
𝕙𝕠𝕥 𝕘𝕚𝕣𝕝 𝕥𝕙𝕠𝕥𝕤: 𝕚𝕟 𝕨𝕙𝕚𝕔𝕙 𝕪𝕠𝕦𝕣 𝕔𝕙𝕚𝕝𝕕 𝕗𝕠𝕣𝕘𝕖𝕥𝕤 𝕥𝕙𝕖𝕪 𝕝𝕚𝕧𝕖 𝕚𝕟 𝕒 𝕓𝕝𝕒𝕔𝕜 𝕙𝕠𝕦𝕤𝕖𝕙𝕠𝕝𝕕
𝕗𝕖𝕞-𝕓𝕝𝕒𝕔𝕜!𝕣𝕖𝕒𝕕𝕖𝕣
𝕨𝕒𝕣𝕟𝕚𝕟𝕘𝕤: 𝕔𝕦𝕣𝕤𝕚𝕟𝕘, 𝕞𝕖𝕟𝕥𝕚𝕠𝕟𝕤 𝕠𝕗 𝕒𝕤𝕤 𝕓𝕖𝕒𝕥𝕚𝕟𝕘
Bakugo Katsuki:
your son had been sent home for getting in a fight and you and bakugo were furious
although he was kind at heart, your kid had always been rough around the edges
but this was unacceptable
katsuki fixed a harsh glare on him, silently promising punishment
you on the other hand were going off
your son sunk further into the chair as he was scolded
as you went on about his recent bad behavior, he finally got fed up with your rant and groans,
“okay mom, I get it. can you just shut up about it already”
it’s like the jazz record stops
jeopardy music starts playing
you can literally feel how cold the air suddenly gets
your kid realizes what just came out of his mouth and looks to his dad as katsuki looks to you and then to his son and then back to you
he watches you watch him
there’s a moment of complete silence before your son screams as you literally lunge after him
youre fast but katsuki’s faster
he had years of hero training to thank
he catches you just before you reach across the chair and you just go ballistic
“DID I HEAR CORRECTLY!? DID YOU JUST TELL ME TO SHUT UP?? HUH!?”
even tho bakugo’s pissed, he tells your kid to apologize
bc he’s lowkey struggling to hold you back 💀
“DO YOU HAVE A FUCKING DEATH WISH, BRAT!? APOLOGIZE!!”
“W-WAIT! I’M SORRY MA, I DIDNT MEAN—“
“I CANT BELIVE YOU JUST—KATSUKI, GET YOUR SON!! GET YOUR SON BEFORE I DO BECAUSE HE’LL END UP MISSING!”
“GOD DAMN IT S/N! WHY WOULD YOU SAY THAT?!”
“IM SORRY”
it just such a mess from there on out lmao
Shinsou Hitoshi:
it was clear to hitoshi on this very day that your daughter held zero value for her own life
bc if she did
there was no way
absolutely no way she would’ve cursed at you
not in this christian household
“that’s so fucking annoying” your daughter muttered in response to you telling her she couldn’t go to a party tonight
it was quiet and supposed to be for her ears only but your daughter was never good at whispering
hitoshi froze with a sandwich halfway in his mouth
your daughter, processing her mistake, widened her eyes in horror
there was something about the way you blankly stared at your kid that made everyone in the room’s hair stand up
“did you just...cuss at me? me? in my own house?”
she starts to profusely apologize and wilts w each word bc you just stare and stare and stare
you hold your ear and lean in
“no, repeat to me what you just said bc I don’t think I heard you right”
(when they tell you to repeat, do not do it)
you take a step towards her and shinsou grabs your arm to keep you in place bc he wasn’t in the mood to see a homicide today 💀
“D/N, go to your room. you’re not going to the party,” he says and your daughter is thankful for a way out
“yes sir,” she she yelps before high tailing her butt outta there 😭
you turn to your husband w the straightest face
“you know that’s your daughter, right?”
“i know, babe” 🙄 (it’s not like you went 50/50 on her or anything)
“good. so you get her, or I do” you calmly say before going back to the dishes
shinsou only laughs
he loves your crazy ass
Kaminari Denki:
your three sons thought they were the fbi or some shit and could sneak back into the house undetected
so imagine their surprise when the chair turns to reveal you
arms crossed, bonnet on, robe secured, and belt in hand
“so where you three been at 2 am in the morning?”
they look at each other with wide eyes, bottom lips quivering to say something
“uhhh w-we went out to get something for dad!”
then another chair twists around to reveal kaminari
legs crossed, hair up, robe secured, and belt in hand
“is that so?” he asks, brows raised in surprise
that’s when they started shivering
the second oldest tries to cover them and says, “y-yeah! dad, didn’t you mention that D/N said she wanted that um uhhh toy last week?”
the final chair turns and reveals your youngest 8 yr old daughter
hands folded, scarf wrapped, robe secured, and belt in hand
she innocently tilts her head and chirps, “when did I say that?”
at this point, it was over for them and they knew it based on the dark looks on their parents’ face and the evil growing smirk that appears on their sister’s lips
they start throwing each other under the bus, talking over one another, and trying to explain why they were “forced” to leave the house even when they were told not to
you raise your hand, and there’s an immediate silence
“three things are gonna happen,” you say. “your sister is going to pick the belt, your father is going handle you three today, and I’m gonna go to bed bc I’m tired. but best believe when I wake up, youre asses are mine. do I make myself clear?”
your three boys want to cry as their sister conveniently picks the thickest one. “y-yes ma’am,” they sniffle
with a satisfied hum, you get up and take yourself and your daughter to bed who leaves with a taunting wave over her shoulder
denki waits for the sound of the bedroom door to close before looking at his three idiots w a tired sigh
him: “....you know I gotta beat your ass, right?”
them: “yeah :(“
you didn’t see much, but you and your daughter had a very peaceful sleep that night
#bnha headcanons#mha headcanons#bnha x black!reader#mha x black!reader#bnha x poc!reader#mha x poc!reader#katuski bakugo#bnha bakugo x reader#bakugo x black reader#shinsou hitoshi#shinsou x reader#shinsou x black!reader#kaminari denki#kaminari x reader#kaminari x black reader#brought to you by the real life of events of cece’s african household#cheers <3
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A Thorn In The Side - Gojo x Reader
Summary: Infatuation enduring from high school is more of a problem than you or he think (~3.4k words).
Warnings: fem pronouns, fem!reader, noncon, kidnapping, yandere, wlw mention, gojo is a pos
A/N: Part of @suedebunn‘s Hanahaki collab!
When the strongest jujutsu sorcerer to have ever lived wakes up in the early am with the sensation of thorns scratching his throat and fullness in his stomach, he’s baffled.
Even more so when he doubles over in bed to cough profusely to the point of near emesis, shocking for a man who rarely gets sick. He stares blankly at a pillow covered in droplets of flecks of red, and his eyes widen with trepidation, until he realizes those large drops strewn across his bed come from flowers rather than blood.
He must be dreaming, Gojo Satoru tells himself, but the satiny feel of the scarlet petals between his fingertips is very real.
Or perhaps a curse.
“So you expect me to diagnose you over the phone?”
Shoko pulled a drag of her cigarette as though for dramatic effect, blowing it out with a sigh, but continued to listen. She had to be up early anyway and ignoring Gojo would only make him more annoying in her experience.
“So what are your symptoms again?” she asked.
“Apparently my insides are trying to match my beautiful outsides~” he sang.
Shoko rolled her eyes, and as though he could see her, Gojo laughed loudly.
“In all seriousness, I’m turning into a garden. Coughing up flowers apparently.”
“Coughing up flowers, huh?” She leaned a little further against her balcony, her eyes setting on the early morning sunrise she could view from her high rise apartment. “Do you think it’s some type of curse?”
“It’s… different,” he replied, somewhat noncommittally. “I don’t think it’s cursed energy, actually.”
This was unexpected.
“What else do you feel?”
“Uneasy…”
It was Shoko’s turn to laugh. An interesting choice of words coming from him.
“Any ideas?” Gojo insisted.
“I mean, it could be some kind of undetectable curse. I’d know if I got to see you… How does your heart feel when you cough up the flowers?”
“It races.”
“Your mind?”
“Also races… lightheaded.”
“Any thoughts?”
“None.”
“As expected.” she teased, laughing again until she realized that for once, Gojo was silent on the other end of the phone. She scratched her head, then ran her fingers through her fingertips.
“Come in at 2pm today, okay? Don’t be late.”
---
“Well, you’re right,” Shoko stated, stepping back from the examination table, and crossing her arms as she set herself down on a stool to formulate her assessment.
Her friend, already graced with the palest of color palettes, did actually look ill, dark circles prominent enough to match hers marring his porcelain skin. He sat, legs spread apart, and leaning onto the weight of his hands besides him, raising an eyebrow quizzically..
“It’s not cursed energy, alright,” she said, with a sigh. She stretched out her hand.
“You brought the sample, right?”
Gojo, uncharacteristically a bit listless, tossed her the bag of vomited petals from this morning, covered in now dry saliva and other fluids. Not batting an eyelash, Shoko slipped on a pair of gloves and felt inside the bag, petals crumbling at her fingertips.
Definitely not cursed energy. She placed the bag on a disorganized counter behind her, making a mental note of scrutinizing it further under a microscope.
“Ideas?” Gojo asked after he’d decided that the time he’d given her to think was enough. It turned out the idea of being sick irritated him more than he expected.
The very idea of being vulnerable made him slightly nauseous.
Shoko let out a chuckle that sounded more nervous than she had intended.
“My only other thought is Hanahaki disease.”
“Hanahaki?” Gojo repeated.
“Yeah,” she stated. Crossing her legs, she relaxed into her stool further as she watched the young man carefully. “Who’s the unlucky one?”
“You mean?”
“Who’s the unfortunate soul you’re in love with?” She asked again, waiting for his response. The truth was that she was quite shocked at the idea of Gojo being afflicted with Hanahaki, that he of all people could have such a pure, destructive form of love given his track history.
She’d known him long enough to know that his body count was near ridiculous.
He tilted his head, then burst into laughter.
“Myself, duh.”
“Well, auto-Hanahaki isn’t a thing, but I suppose if it was, you’d be the one to be afflicted with it.”
She decided not to press further. “Whoever it is, I’d recommend you settle your feelings as soon as possible,” she added. “People don’t usually die from this but you look surprisingly like shit so I’d be careful.”
Gojo ran a hand through his hair, hopping off the table and pulling back on his shirt.
Settling his feelings may be more complicated than either of the two of them expected.
---
You were in the middle of your drive home when Shoko’s name finally flashed on your dashboard. Grinning, you picked up on the car speaker, mischief in your voice.
“It’s 7:03 and you promised me you’d call at 7 sharp, babe. What do you have to say for yourself?”
“You’re going to hold 3 minutes against me?” Her sultry voice filled your ears as you made the last turn between the grocery store and your apartment, and you hoped she’d be inside your home waiting for you so that you could actually hold something tangible against her.
“I did say I wasn’t going to tolerate you being late for anything anymore, didn’t I?” You teased.
“Bold declaration for someone who isn’t even home yet,” Shoko retorted.
In minutes, you were walking through the door, arms charged with bags full of groceries for dinner you’d planned to cook together. Shoko greeted you with a kiss on the forehead as you placed them on the counter.
“Did you miss me?”
You did, but you stuck out your tongue at her instead. Her hand intertwined with yours briefly before you separated to unpack items for dinner.
“I promise I’ll be less busy,” she offered as the two of you worked in tandem. Your stomach was already growling, so the sooner you had food on the table, the better.
“It’s no problem,” you replied, and you meant it only half-heartedly. It’s true she was less busy than a regular civilian doctor, but it seemed recently that her clinic was getting overrun with more and more curse victims. Things had been bad recently in the world, you figured.
You were happy to step back from the world of sorcery, but small reminders like these persisted.
“Did you still manage to fit Gojo in today?”
She had complained earlier today that Gojo always managed to make a bad day worse.
“Mmm,” is what she offered over the sound of chopping vegetables. You understood that she couldn’t say more, on top of the fact that any discussion of Gojo was already a sore subject. It didn’t have to be, and it shouldn’t have been, but this was what it was.
“Hope he’s okay,” you offered, as you turned on the stove.
“He’ll be fine,” she replied, her voice now quieter than usual.
---
The first and last time Gojo fell in love was in the spring of his third year, he suddenly recalled in the middle of a tryst, as an upsettingly subpar blowjob allowed his mind to wander. The young woman whose gags sounded almost theatrical when compared to the amount of pleasure he was actually receiving was starting to get on his nerves, but instead he took matters in his own hands, wrapping her long ponytail around his wrist before guiding the back of her head so she took him deeper.
If she was gonna choke, she should commit to it.
He’d fallen in love with you at first sight. It was a strange feeling for him to immediately be enamored with someone upon first glance instead, having always been the recipient of many an awe-filled or fawning look.
You were a transfer from the sister school, already a rare occurrence, and what was even rarer was the fact that you both had little affinity to jujutsu and little interest in getting better. One could wonder why you even showed up in the first place, much less why you’d moved from one school to the other.
You’d quit as expected just before graduation, but not before you caught his eye.
“You’re pretty shitty at this,” he’d remarked, attempting to win you over with humor when he’d been assigned to you for both orientation and possible tutoring. “Of course, you can always ask me for help,” he added, flashing pearly whites at you.
He was the opposite of successful in wooing you.
“I suppose since this comes easy to you, this is just funny, right?” You’d quipped.
Your words cut more than both you and he anticipated, but it didn’t exactly matter. You were not interested in him, the way he was interested in you.
But Shoko was different.
You became fast friends and upon your departure from the technical college, you’d remained in contact despite withdrawing from everyone else related to magic.
Even if Gojo tried many times to either bring you back to this world you’d left behind or be part of your new one, you’d rebuffed him every time. Harshly.
“I don’t know why you expect everyone to worship you,” was the last thing you’d said to him. “I’ve already made it clear that I don’t want to be part of this life,” you’d insisted. “Why would I change my mind just because you asked me to?”
You were right.
And yet you loved Shoko.
The young woman whose name he’d forgotten’s face was now pressed against his pubic bone and she now began to squirm, slapping and scratching at him like some kind of trapped animal as she struggled to breathe, reminding him that he’d daydreamed for too long.
“Sorry,” he offered, as he released his grip, leaving her to sputter and choke. Looking at her, knowing that she was not you suddenly made him want to choke himself, to bring forth that impromptu garden of unrequited feelings.
He patted her on the back gingerly, and once it looked like she’d restabilized, pulled her in for another kiss.
If only her lips tasted like yours.
---
Shoko’s hand glided against the curve of your hips, taking in the image of you sleeping softly on your side, facing her. She dipped down to kiss your nose; it was the only time the fact that she had such an issue with sleep benefited her, this ability to almost always wake up before you.
You looked incredibly peaceful while sleeping, and she had to admit this angelic view of you was even better than your features twisted in a pleasured mewl (not that it wasn’t a close battle).
There was a nagging concern in the pit of her stomach, however.
Gojo suffering from unrequited love could be a problem, if the object of his affections did happen to be you. But it had been years ago that he’d pursued you unsuccessfully, why present now?
Why present to her office of all people? Gojo could be inconsiderate, but not to this extent.
But what if he didn’t know that this was what he was feeling? Suppressed feelings taking root and morphing themselves into the tangible he couldn’t ignore?
She sat up, resting her back against the backboard, the lack of a cigarette between her lips being palliated with the gnaw of her thumbnail.
It couldn’t be. Not you.
Please, not you.
---
“Hey, how are you feeling?” Shoko checked in about a week later.
Gojo didn’t share that he’d spent the entire morning in a coughing fit of petals, now definitely streaked with blood, and the entire last night vomiting enough flowers into the toilet that it had overflowed.
He didn’t comment on the entire scarlet sage plants with large green leaves that threatened to sprout from every orifice, not just his throat, but his ears and nostrils, possibly from behind his eyes.
He didn’t know what was next, only that it was getting worse.
The constant fire in the pit of his stomach, the shivers, the chills, the incessant flash of you running through his mind, your name moaned in the darkness, his body drenched in sweat.
The fact that he knew it was because he loves you and cannot find an alternative for you.
The fact that he must have you, and only you.
“Has it gotten better or worse?” Shoko asked.
“I’m fine,” Gojo reassured her, masking the exhaustion in his voice, and she made the mistake of believing him.
---
You awoke in darkness with an icy cold searing into your skin.
It took you a moment to let your eyes adjust to the light and for your body to resume the motor control it had briefly relinquished in sleep before you could reorient yourself. You were laying on ground of some sort, maybe hardwood which implied that you were in some kind of building.
Your head throbbed viciously as you shifted slowly to a sitting position and you almost expected there to be blood as you ran your hands over the back of your head, checking for injury. But there was nothing, just the normal feel of your hair, and the steady thump of your temples in time with your pounding heart.
Looking around, your eyes soon fixed to the low light, not actual darkness to center on a figure in the center of the room.
You let out a gasp of surprise.
Gojo.
Not only had it been a while and he was the last person you expected to see, he looked stranger than he ever had.
He sat perched on a chair backwards, chin leaning on the top of the backrest. His head was tilted, and he watched you warily but fixedly through eyes that looked sunken into their orbits. Their clear blue was still sharp in the darkness.
His skin had taken on an almost ghostly cast to match his hair, and he was thinner than you remembered as though he had been slowly withering away since the last time you saw him. That was ages ago.
Your limbs froze in anticipation. You didn’t have to be a genius to recognize that whatever was happening or was about to happen was bad.
“Why did you bring me here?”
He stared at you blankly for a moment, unmoving. If he weren’t so extraordinarily fatigued, he would have sat up straighter in his chair and offered you a smile. You were still as pretty as the day he first laid eyes on you, after all. What a welcome sight.
“I guess I missed you,” he responded instead, quietly.
Your teeth gritted as you flared up in indignation.
“Excuse me?”
He cut you off with a loud, exasperated sigh, mustering the little bit of energy he had left to run a hand through his hair.
“Listen, I thought I’d forgotten myself, but it turns out that I’m being betrayed by my own body.”
As though to add effect, a coughing fit began just at the end of his sentence, and you watched as he spat flowers into the palm of his hand, lowering them for you to see.
“And it seems like you’re the cause of this.”
Your eyes widened as you took in the sight of bloody petals falling through his fingertips and hitting the ground.
He was completely out of his mind.
“I…,” you shakily got yourself up to your feet, not letting your gaze leave Gojo for a second. He didn’t get out of the chair, but he did shift so that he leaned back in the seat, a wicked smile on his face.
“You...?”
“What the fuck are you talking about?” You spat. “Where the hell am I and how did I get here?”
He finally did get up, although it was done in a dramatic, strained movement. He really had lost weight, you noticed, picking up the flash of pale wrists before he shoved his hands in his pocket.
“I know it sounds crazy but apparently, according to your girlfriend, I’m suffering from lovesickness.”
He bared more of his teeth now, looking more like a grimace than a grin by this time. “I didn’t believe it either, but then I started seeing you in my mind every single waking moment.”
In the split second it took for you to blink, he had crossed the distance between you, so that he was now in your personal space, the palm of his hand inappropriately caressing your face, as tender as you’d expect from Shoko.
And you immediately jumped back and backhanded him as hard as you could.
The crack of your hand was loud and exaggerated, reverberating in the room. For a moment, you froze in shock, surprised the slap had actually landed, before shaking out your now burning hand and following up with a hiss.
“Don’t you fucking touch me.”
Gojo’s icy blue eyes glint, demonic in their delight.
“That’s the feisty bitch I remember.”
---
It was nearing 24 hours since you’d failed to reply to Shoko’s text and the normally collected woman was terribly anxious.
She’d stayed at work late, and still, not a single message from you.
The nagging feeling in the back of her mind returned.
What if it were you?
Gojo couldn’t be that insane, could he?
When she entered your home to find traces of red salvia scattered throughout your home, it only confirmed her fears.
---
“I don’t want to do this either. I mean it.”
It was hard to believe him when he seemed to savor every brush of the lips as he trailed kisses along your inner thighs, spread open with the force of his hands. Gojo had always been deceptively strong, even now, when it looked like he was wilting just as much as the flowers he coughed up.
Your wrists were bound to a fixed point at the head of a foreign bed, and your ankles to the bedposts anteriorly to prevent you from fighting. Not that you would have been able to fight back anyway, but the severe fatigue permeating his very bones made him less willing to risk anything.
When his lips made it to your center to circle your clit, you writhed in disgust, forcing back the sighs of pleasure that would inevitably ensure.
“Y-you can’t - ah - make me love you…”
Gojo paused the swishing of his tongue to give you a look that reeked enough of apathy that it was almost startling.
“I’m aware, but there’s no harm in trying.”
---
“Where the fuck is she?”
Satoru had the ostentatiousness within him to receive the phone call on speaker, so that you could hear Shoko beg to find out your whereabouts.
“She’s with me,” he replied, calmly to her, holding the phone in one hand and pumping fingers in and out of your slippery cunt with the other.
By this time, Gojo had gotten tired of your expletives which no longer retained the initial cute charm, so your screams for help were muffled by a gag over your own wet panties shoved into your mouth.
He’d been at this for hours.
There was a pause on the phone from Shoko’s end that sounded like something crashing to the ground, maybe a plate breaking.
Her tone changed immediately.
“P-please don’t hurt her.”
“I’m not.”
He glanced at you who glared back at him with reddened eyes and tear-stained cheeks. You looked even prettier when you were so totally helpless.
“I would never,” he added.
The pump of his fingers slowed but did not stop.
“This won’t fix you,” Shoko warned, almost in a low protective hiss, her own voice breaking. “This won’t fix anything, you bastard.”
He cut off the phone abruptly, and let out a sigh before shifting his attention back to you.
“Where were we?”
---
Maybe if I pretend, he’ll stop?
Or will he continue? Will I just affirm that he won?
His thrusts were relentless, as was the constant tugging at your hair, the teeth sinking into every inch of your skin, the moans and groans whispered into your ears or your bosom.
A violation in every sense of the word.
You were running out of tears.
The fact that it’s pointless, you and he both know it. Your true love knows it, that this is just an excuse to get back at you. For what? Rejection?
He would die anyway. You would never return his feelings, if there even truly were any.
He continued to rut into you, and flowers started to stain every inch of your bodies, covering them in a deep scarlet.
Red. Red. Red.
Blood. Rage. Power. Passion.
You probably didn’t need the restraints anymore. You had no fight left in you.
Just the satisfaction, however small, that regardless of what he did to you, he would still eventually succumb to nature and perish in a bed of putrid efflorescence.
#gojo x reader#gojo satoru x reader#collab fic#jujutsu kaisen#jjk#jujutsu kaisen smut#gojo smut#shoko x reader#tw noncon#mae.writing
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Give her the life I never had; Harry Potter x child reader
*Author’s note*
So this came from my Wattpad requests and this is my first Harry potter (character not fandom) fic that I have written so I hope I didn’t mess this up for any hardcore Potterheads out there. So this takes place during the Battle at Hogwarts so expect some death and violence involved, other than that not really much anything really. I know it’s been awhile since my last update but I hope to pick up the pace and post up some more stuff and then HOPEFULLY open up requests here since I know you all have been waiting patiently for that.
Taglist:
@plethora-of-things
@waddles03
@jd-johndeacon-or-jackdaniels
@ixchel-9275
@psychosupernatural
@queen-paladin
_____________________________________________________________
It was finally over. All of it. Voldemort was now dead, the Death eaters defeated, and now the Elder wand was destroyed and lost to the sea. I looked towards the ruins of Hogwarts knowing that the stone and walls can be rebuilt, some of our friends would be able to heal their physical wounds, however some mental wounds won’t.
The Weasleys they’ll always have to live with Fred’s death for the rest of their life and grieve over the fact he’ll never come back, especially George. I had seen just how close their brotherly bond was, even when they had nothing they had each other, now George was gonna have to make do on his own, if he could.
And Hermione, while she doesn’t want us to know I had a feeling at what she had done to protect her muggle parents, thankfully with her and Ron seeming to repair their growing relationship, I know the Weasley’s will welcomingly be the family she needs now more than ever.
As I walked along the school grounds that’s when I came across (Y/n) getting looked over by one of the healers. When she looked towards me, she gently smiled and I smiled softly back at her thinking back on how I found her in all this chaos.
The battle was pure hell. Spells and curses being blasted, bodies dropping like flies, and rubble from the school walls crumbling down as repercussions from the spells firing out.
I had pushed back a Death Eater with an Stupefy spell which sent him flying all the way across the Great Hall. Another death eater soon came right at me but I quickly disposed of his wand first before giving him the paralyzing spell.
That’s when I heard it. The sound of a young girl crying. I quickly ran around the corridor and saw just down the stairs where I once found the Mirror of Erised, a young girl around maybe her 1-2nd year hovering over an older girl who looked almost like her but had longer hair. The young girl with shorter hair was weeping hysterically as she kept crying.
“Liz? Lizzie. Get up sis. Oh please get up.” From the pale skin and the soulless eyes that Lizzie had, I knew immediately she had been hit with the Killing curse. Cautiously I walked over to her and said.
“Are you alright?” the young girl looked up at me and she sniffled.
“Yes. But my sister she—she won’t wake up yet her eyes are open.” Knowing how I hadn’t learned of the 3 unforgiving curses until my 4th year at Hogwarts, she must’ve not known what exactly happened to her sister.
“What’s your name?”
“(Y/n). (Y/n) (l/n).”
“Well (Y/n), I…….I’m afraid to tell you this but……..your sister’s—she’s dead.”
“What? No but….if she were dead her eyes would be shut, the spell that hit her just made her collapse. Like the paralysis spell.”
“But it wasn’t a blue light that hit her, was it?” she looked back down at her sister and touched her cheek. “I’m afraid it was the most dangerous of all unforgiving curses. The Killing Curse.” She sniffled and hugged her sister’s corpse and choked out.
“But—she was…..she’s all I have left!” I looked around and two more Death eaters spotted us.
“Get behind me.” I urged (Y/n). Without question she got behind me and I held out my wand and as they charged toward us I called out, “Stupefy!” which sent one Death eater flying backwards but then I felt a shock to my hand which sent my wand flying towards the second Death eater’s hand. She sneered at me but then a voice exclaimed.
“Petrificus Totalus!” the female Death eater soon went stiff and fell to the ground. I turned and saw that it was (Y/n) who had casted the curse. I ran over and took my wand back from the witch and told her.
“Come on. We can’t stay here.” She took one last look at her sister. I knew she was hesitant to leave her but if she remained here, she’d be a sitting duck. “Your sister would want you safe (Y/n).” she turned to me and nodded before taking my hand and we raced out of the hallway.
Together the two of us worked together to fend off the oncoming Death Eaters, but one Death eater used an Inferno spell which burnt (Y/n)’s arm pretty bad. I shielded her from the next oncoming Inferno attack but the heat of the flames was almost too strong for me to hold back. That’s when a wave of water came and extinguished the flames and the Death Eater was flown backwards till his back hit a column and he collapsed dead.
We turned and there stood Professor McGonagall.
“Professor.”
“Harry, Ms. (L/n) are you both alright?”
“I am, (Y/n) however got burnt on her arm.” She walked up to us and she examined (Y/n)’s arm. She let out a painful hiss and the Professor said.
“I’ll take care of her from here Potter.”
“Thank you Professor.” Just as I was about to leave, I felt a hand grab the sleeve of my shirt and I saw that it was (Y/n).
“Thank you, Harry Potter.” I smiled down at her and nodded to her. She released my sleeve and I ran off to finally end this once and for all.
I walked over to her just as the healer cleared her off and moved onto the next student that needed medical treatment. I sat down beside her and asked her.
“How are you doing (Y/n)?”
“Shaky but—alive.” She softly scoffed. “But at what cost? My sister’s dead. She was the only family I had left. Now the ministry will probably put me in the Magic for Orphans facility, and with me almost being a teenager, no one will want me.”
I was probably the only one who knew what she must be going through. Even though we were orphaned in different circumstances, we still lost our loved ones to Voldemort. Now I must be crazy because I had no clear idea of what to do next but what I did know was that I couldn’t leave (Y/n) alone anymore.
“What if—” I started off by saying. “What if you…had someone to look after you?”
“But, but Harry I—I have no other living relatives. It’s always just been me and my sister since our parents died three years ago at the Quidditch world cup.”
“I know, but what if there was someone who wanted to help you out. Give you a home so that you wouldn’t have to suffer any potential abuse or neglect.”
“And just who would that person be?” I sighed softly before telling her.
“You’re looking at him.” Her eyes softly widened before she let out a soft gasp.
“But-but why? I mean no offense Harry but…..why would you want to help me out?”
“Let’s just say, from one orphan to another I know how lonely it can be. I had no clue about the magic world till I was just your age, and though I may not know how the Ministry of Magic deals with orphaned wizards, I do know a thing or two about living in terrible conditions. I lived practically my whole childhood in a tiny hall closet in my aunt and uncle’s place. And I wouldn’t want you to potentially go through that type of abuse in a stranger’s home.”
(Y/n) was silent for a moment, taking in what I just said. Weighing out her options before thinking about what answer she would give me.
“If not I’ll understand, I’ll check in whenever I can. But just know you won’t go through the rest of your life alone.” She looked up at me. Her eyes that were once filled with tears, but now filled with courage and strength as she said.
“If it won’t be too much trouble with you, I’ll go with you.” I softly smiled at her and told her taking notice of her robes.
“Spoken like a true Gryffindor.”
After that, the Weasley family, Hermione, myself and (Y/n) returned to the Weasley’s old home the Burrow and decided to rebuild it, a symbol as a fresh start to all our lives after this whole war.
We also had a memorial service for both Fred and (Y/n)’s older sister, each of us speaking for both Fred and (Y/n)’s sister before finally burying them and summoning a beautiful garden around them of their favorite flowers and plants.
As the sun was starting to set I saw (Y/n) still standing over her sister’s grave. I walked out to her and said.
“Mrs. Weasley’s prepared supper for all of us. She says you best come in before it’s all gone.” (Y/n) remained silent. I softly sighed and without another word I just stood there beside her. She may not want to talk, but she should at least know that someone was there when she was ready.
“I—never thought I’d have to face this world without her. Even through our fights, especially after mom and dad died, she was always there for me. She especially liked to tease me about my crush on Joey Matarazzo, saying we’d get married one day and have kids of our own. Now she won’t ever see me grow up, or achieve any dreams I’ll have for the future.”
“Let me tell you something my Godfather once told me. He told me that the ones that love us never really leave us. And we can always find them, in here.” I pointed to her heart.
She looked up at me and finally for the first time I saw a true, genuine smile. She came closer to me and wrapped an arm around my waist and rested her head against my ribs. I wrapped an arm around her and we stood there for a few more minutes before walking back inside the Burrow to join the Weasley’s for dinner.
*FF 19 years later.*
It was like any other year, but this time it was my second son’s first time doing this. I could already see from the look on his face that he looked anxious about his first year going as we came up to platform 9¾.
“Together.” I assured him as we took hold of his cart and we both ran straight through the brick wall and found ourselves right by the Hogwarts Express. As we walked closer to the train, we soon found Ron and Hermione with their kids, I spotted Draco and his wife and son bidding their goodbyes. He and I looked at each other, neither of us speaking a word but he gave me a point nod, and I nodded back to him.
“I was beginning to think I’d have to write my own brothers up for detention already.” A female voice soon spoke up and coming right towards us was (Y/n), all grown up and in her Professor robes.
Since the battle she continued on her Hogwarts education and excelled in both Magical creature knowledge and potions making. By the time she was in her 4th year at Hogwarts, Ginny and I had agreed to legally adopt her as our own child and she was beyond thrilled at the news. After graduating, she worked with me at the Ministry of Magic to focus on potion brewery before enrolling to be the next Potions Professor and this would be her second year teaching that class.
I’m told she’s kind but firm when it comes to students goofing off in that class, but she is always there to make sure no student messes up a potion and causes injuries either to themselves or others.
“Not in the slight.” I assured her.
“Good. I would hate to have to write them up to Headmaster McGonagall.” She told me. She looked down at her brothers and asked them, “So boys, you ready?”
“Oh yeah!” exclaimed James while Albus was more reserved and didn’t really say anything. Instead he walked away and sat down with his arms hugging his legs close to him. (Y/n) and I looked at each other and I told her to get James onto the train as well as herself while I talked to James. She nodded and guided James as well as his things over to the train while I walked over to Albus and knelt down beside him.
“Dad,” he spoke. “What if I am put in Slytherin?”
“Albus Severus Potter. You were named after two Headmasters of Hogwarts. And one of them was a Slytherin. And he was the bravest man I had ever known. But if it means to you, you can choose Gryffindor. The sorting hat does take that into consideration.”
“Really?” I nodded. “But how would you feel? If I was sorted into Slytherin?”
“Then Slytherin will have gained the best wizard they could ask for.” He smiled and embraced me and I hugged him back. “Now come on, off you go.” We then walked towards the train and Albus got himself situated inside with his brother and Ron and Hermione’s kids, and riding alongside them to keep an eye on them to Hogwarts was (Y/n).
As I stood by my friends and we watched the train leave the station, waving goodbye to our kids I couldn’t help but feel like we had done it. The war ended almost 2 decades ago and now our children can learn magic in a better world, a world without Death Eaters, a world without darkness and death, a world without a Dark Lord.
A peaceful time in our world.
#harry potter#harry potter fandom#harry potter fanfiction#harry potter fanfic#harry potter x reader#harry potter x child reader#harry potter imagine#harry potter imagines#harry potter fluff#harry potter and the deathly hallows#ron weasley#Hermione Granger#ron x hermione#fred weasley rip#george weasley#harry potter x ginny weasley
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cynosure
cynosure [noun. one that serves to direct or guide; a center of attraction or attention]
pairing: sukuna/f!reader
summary: in which sukuna re-discovers being human one aspect at a time, through many lifetimes, at the price of losing you over and over.
wordcount: 8.7k
content/warnings: reincarnation au, slow burn but also not really because there's only hints of romance? language, it's not canon at all, just pretend sukuna was never sealed away, lowercase is intended
a/n: this is more self-indulgent tbh sukuna is probably uncharacteristically soft? sometimes i'm reminded of the fact that he used to be human and while we don't exactly know how he became a curse just yet, i kinda felt sad about it lol i'm too sympathetic with everything, it's gonna kill me one day fhuierhfa a lot of these moments are based on my own experiences, where i had to remind myself that even the small things in life are really good and important, especially during the pandemic. that being said, i hope you enjoy and stay safe everyone :) (and please don’t judge me too hard on this lol i haven’t written in like what. six years?)
001.
“oh,” you stared at the tall, pink-haired man in front of you. “i didn’t think anyone would be here around this time…” he stared back at you, not replying nor making any move to scoot over so that you could sit on your bench. it was only then that you noticed the black markings framing his face and adorning his wrists. you were a little dumbfounded - your mother had always said that you had a poor survival instinct. though you supposed that his pink hair eased your nerves a little; surely someone with pink hair couldn’t be as evil. but you couldn’t recall ever seeing someone like this around the proximity of your village. maybe he was a vagrant.
“i don’t mean to be rude but… that’s my bench and i would appreciate if you could maybe… scooch over?” you asked gingerly, not wanting to upset the stranger. you approached him slowly, grasping your basket tightly. if he got a little rowdy, maybe you could just wack him with the basket, right? although it probably won’t hurt but it surely would stun him long enough for you to run.
“i don’t see why i should move just because it’s your bench,” the stranger answered gruffly, crossing his arms. were you naive or just stupid? “do you not know who you’re talking to, woman?”
you cocked your head to the side, not sure what he meant. maybe he was one of those famous poets or musicians that your parents liked to talk about. you weren’t entirely sure. even though he sounded annoyed, the look in his eyes didn’t quite match the hostility - he looked rather bored, unamused even, but not hostile. maybe you could humour him a little. “am- am i supposed to know you? i’ve never been outside of the village so i don’t know much. only what the merchants tell me. i apologize if i’ve offended you,” you explained hastily, then pointing at your basket. “i just came here to enjoy the sunrise. um, today is my birthday, so i treated myself to some dessert!”
“if- if you scooch over a litte, i could share some with you…” you tried to bargain with him. now you were truly starting to sound desperate but this was your favourite spot and it was the first time in a while that you had a free day to relax. out of all days, just why did he have to be here now? you’d be damned if you let your day get ruined by this unfriendly stranger.
“are you trying to bribe me?” the stranger narrowed his eyes at you and you thought this was it. he was going to kill you and bury your body in the forest and your parents would come look for you, only to find your empty basket and then start a huge search party to find you and- the pink haired man moved to the side, refusing to look you in the eyes. “sit.”
you let out a squeak in glee, quickly taking a seat beside him. he watched in silence as you unwrap your desserts, glancing at the objects in question. even though you’d offered to share with him, he didn’t actually expect you to give him some of your food. sukuna was surprised when you handed him a… round squishy thing?
“what is that? how is that going to satiate me?” he asked, almost offended, which made you giggle. you didn’t reply, instead thrusting the mochi towards him until he begrudgingly took it, closely inspecting it in suspicion.
“that’s a daifuku mochi. it’s made out of rice flour and filled with red bean paste. but come to think of it… do you even like sweets? i’m sorry if you don’t particularly enjoy it,” you explained and grabbed one as well. you were about to bite into your mochi when you saw the stranger opening his mouth, ready to devour the entire mochi in one go. in horror, you quickly grabbed his wrist to stop him, only to have him suddenly pin you down and tower over you.
“i’m sorry, i’m sorry!” you hastily said, now suddenly aware of the dark, threatening aura that he was emitting. maybe he was a killer after all. “i just didn’t want you to eat it in one go! they’re kind of difficult to eat in one go… plus you’re supposed to savour and enjoy it, take your time eating it!”
sukuna stared at the girl in disbelief, you’d grabbed him out of nowhere just to stop him from eating too fast? not only were you not aware of who he was, you apparently did not know how to be cautious around strangers. it irked him that you were acting like he was a harmless human being. so much so that he briefly contemplated killing you. “who are you to tell me how to eat?” he growled at you, not softening his grip. he saw the panic and fear in your eyes but for some reason, he couldn’t quite put a finger on it, it didn’t fill him with joy as it usually did.
“i’m just telling you how we usually eat mochi!” you harrumphed, now annoyed that he was acting like you just committed murder. “you didn’t know what these were, so i was just trying to explain! food is supposed to be enjoyed, not ravished all at once. you have to appreciate your food because there might be days where you won’t have any. and besides, enjoying and properly tasting your meal is the least you can do to show gratitude to the person who cooked it for you.” sukuna let up and sat back on his previous spot, seemingly accepting your answer. you sat up, adjusting your yukata and pouted at him. what a rude stranger! you at least expected an apology from him but seeing that he was already taking a bite from his mochi, you guessed you should just let it go. it wasn’t worth getting angry over anyways, not on this day.
“why are you looking at me like that, little girl?” sukuna questioned, taking another bite from his mochi. he did actually enjoy it and it took every bone in his body not to hastily eat more and to savour it like you’d told him to. maybe this wasn’t so bad after all, it made him think about his meals a little more. not eating for the sake of eating, but for enjoyment, he mused. sort of like living for enjoyment, not for the sake of living.
“you never told me your name,” the girl replied innocently. sukuna sighed. so you really weren’t aware of who he was. “my name is y/n! now it’s only fair if you tell me, especially because i shared my food with you. please?”
before sukuna could reply, he sensed someone quickly approaching. they were hiding somewhere in the forest; it likely was a jujutsu sorcerer, trying to exorcise him. he could deal with them later, but not here, not with you around. the girl looked at him in disappointment when he abruptly stood up, turning towards the forest behind them. unfortunately, he had the inkling that you wouldn’t let it go until he answered: “my name is sukuna, king of curses.” your eyes widened in recognition but you didn’t immediately react or scramble away from him, most likely frozen in fear.
“now go. someone is coming and you do not want to be in the crossfire.”
002.
as a seamstress, you’ve encountered all kinds of customers. ranging from rude and bratty to eternally grateful, you’ve seen it all. your supervisor had always told you to remain calm and polite, to just adhere to their wishes to not cause any ruckus. after all, people of status often assumed that they were untouchable and could treat others poorly. it wasn’t worth the hassle to start a fight with them, you could lose your job after all. there was moments you’d have to stand up for yourself but this wasn’t it. fortunately, your employer paid you well, enough for you to provide for your family. the customers were high-profile after all.
you looked at the clock on the wall, your next customer was supposed to come soon. it was a nobleman that apparently travelled here from far away, having heard that the store offered beautiful, one of a kind fabrics. you just hope that he wasn’t rude and that you could leave in time. you’d been working overtime for weeks now, taking every appointment and customer that you could get. your mother’s birthday was approaching and you’d been saving up to buy some of the soft and silky fabrics to sew her a new yukata. your mother had always sacrificed her own comfort to buy the best items she could afford for your siblings and you and now that you were older, you could finally treat her to something nice as well. your employer was even willing to give you a small discount and you gratefully took up on her offer.
the chime of the doorbell made you look up, the good feeling in your stomach slowly fading when you saw who entered. you were familiar with the customer after all; he was well known in the area, being a rather volatile and sometimes scary aristocrat who had the reputation to be particularly difficult and having outrageous demands. you hastily stood up, brushing the wrinkles out of your clothing and walking over to greet him. you bowed politely, taking the outerwear that he took off and placing it on a nearby armchair. “sir, i’ll bring you a few samples shortly. do you have any colour or pattern preferences?” you asked him, placing a pot of tea and a cup on the small side table for him to enjoy. you made note of his wishes and disappeared in the storage room to pick up the samples. the customer had made himself at home, eyeing you scrutinizingly. he made you queasy, looking so incredibly unfriendly and you could tell that you were not going home early tonight.
you showed each of the fabrics to him, explaining what materials they were made of and what occasions they were good for but with each explanation, he just looks more and more uninterested. not to mention the snarky remarks he made, seemingly not happy of the choices you presented him. you were running out of options and you didn’t know what else to do to please him when suddenly you heard someone enter the shop. both the customer and you looked over confused - you weren’t expecting any more customers today, it was already late after all. a tall, pink-haired man entered the shop, scowling at your customer. you jumped slightly; he looked scary and you were terrified, not sure what to do in this situation. not only were the black markings on his face and body terrifying, there was also a threatening aura surrounding him, dark and slowly spreading out, all your instincts were screaming at you to run. should you politely ask him to leave? he looked like he wouldn’t take it too well. before you could ask him whether he was looking for something, the stranger spoke up: “you know who i am, leave.”
your eyes widened, slowly inching back towards the back of the store. you were not aware of who this man was but by the looks of your pale-faced customer, he surely did. “this is outrageous!” he exclaimed indignantly, jumping out of his seat. “you can’t just burst in here and demand that i leave! i have an appointment! are you aware of how long the waiting list is? this is the finest shop in the entire prefecture and i would rather die than to give up my spot for a scoundrel like you.” the stranger raised his eyebrows at the shorter man, clicking his tongue in annoyance. you slowly reached out to grab your pair of scissors. they probably weren’t of much use but it made you feel more safe, knowing you could at least somehow defend yourself.
“oh? you would rather die? i’m sure that can be arranged,” the stranger threatened and it was with horror that you watched his fingernails, sharp and pointy, grow in size. he wasn’t human, you’d just encountered a monster. he would kill you and it wouldn’t take him much effort to do so, you were sure he could just stab you with those fingernails. your customer squeaked and left the store in panic, slamming the door in the process, while you quickly hid behind the counter. you hoped he would leave you alone, you didn’t want to get involved. this wasn’t your problem, you were innocent and it was an unfortunate coincidence for you to be here.
“stop hiding,” the stranger commanded, slowly approaching the counter. you peeked from below the counter, holding your breath. what else could he possibly want from you? demons surely didn’t need money. oh god, was he going to kidnap you?
he swiftly rounded the corner and knelt down to take a closer look at you - you couldn’t react fast enough, he’d already grabbed your chin and made you look at him, turning your head from side to side as he examined you. his fingernails were slightly digging into your skin, making your face scrunch up in discomfort. “so it is you,” he exclaimed in a low voice, then abruptly standing back up. you were confused - what did he mean by that? at least he didn’t kill you, at least not yet. but what else could he possibly want from you? “i need a new kimono. that scumbag just left anyways, make one for me instead.”
a kimono? a simple kimono? you couldn’t believe what you just heard. this demon just came in here, threw a fit but all he wanted was a simple kimono? you couldn’t help but scoff at the situation though it probably was difficult to enter a store without people fleeing or refusing to serve him. while he did look human, the markings on his face made it difficult not to feel threatened. but why did he know you? you had never seen this man in your life before. not in passing, not on drawings, nowhere. no matter how hard you wracked your brain, you just couldn’t recall. “d- do you have any- any colour preference?” you questioned him, watching how he took a seat and grabbed himself the cup of tea.
“white,” he answered curtly, taking a sip from the tea. “i’ll leave everything else up to you.”
you felt uncomfortable but there was nothing else you could do than follow his orders. you grabbed a few plain white fabric samples and slowly inched over to him, holding them out with your trembling hands. “what?” he deadpanned. you huffed in frustration.
“sir, you should… you should choose the fabric. it’s your kimono after all, you might not like the feeling of the fabric or it might not be a good fit for your everyday life,” you explained.
“i don’t care, just choose whatever. i’m above the comfort you stupid mortals choose.”
“that’s stupid,” the words left your mouth quicker than you could stop yourself and you slapped your hands over your mouth. the stranger looked at you as equally shocked. “i mean- i mean there’s nothing wrong with indulging in comfortable clothes!” you explained quickly, pressing the samples into his hands. “see you wouldn’t like scratchy clothes, right? or fabric that quickly makes you sweat or feel too warm! i always talk to my customers about what kinds of fabrics they would prefer… i believe life is too short to wear ill-fitting clothes or ones that don’t feel comfortable! good clothing should make you feel like… like a warm hug.”
the stranger didn’t look like he understood what you meant, making you scoff again. some people really didn’t care about what they wore and how they looked like and it just bothered you. good quality fabrics and well tailored clothing could make you feel confident and safe, even in the worst situations. how could you possibly relax if your clothing was maybe scratchy or ill-fitting? “i’ll prove it to you!” you exclaimed and left the room to gather your supplies, then coming back to instruct him where and how to stand so you could take his measurements. now that he was towering over you, you were suddenly very aware of how tall and broad he was. you felt like a dwarf next to him. up close, you noticed more details about him. he was attractive, you couldn’t deny that - the long wispy eyelashes, the watchful ruby eyes and his soft-looking pink hair. if he picked up on your staring, he didn’t comment on it.
once you were done taking notes and choosing fabrics, you gave him a slip of paper, noting down time and date for him to come back to pick the kimono up. “as for payment-” you started but the stranger dropped a huge bag of coins on the counter. you gasped, pushing the bag back into his arms. “sir, that’s too much! i’ll calculate the exact price for you but-”
“take it,” he insisted and pushed it back towards you. “i have enough. you need the money right? see it as a generous tip.” your face flushed, you didn’t even know what to say and instead only profusely thanked him. it was so much money, the tip was enough to cover your family’s expenses for a year.
when sukuna picked up his kimono weeks later, he still didn’t understand what a hassle you made about the choice of fabrics and why you were so diligent in taking the measurements. he was fine with everything as long as he had something to wear in the first place. he didn’t care, he wasn’t a measly human that whined about the mildest inconvenience. in the private of his abode, he tried the kimono on, abruptly halting his movements as soon as the fabric touched his skin. so the girl was right, the fabric did feel incredibly good on his skin. it was very smooth and silky, a little cool on his skin. very lightweight but not flimsy. the kimono wasn’t too short and fit his tall statue well, you really did a good job he supposed. he glanced at himself in the mirror. it did look good on him, even the matching colours and patterns were chosen well. you really were a good seamstress, no wonder everyone was flocking to the store.
now that sukuna wore the kimono, he suddenly didn’t want to take it off. it was comfortable and soft, reminding him of you.
003.
your favourite spot was one below a tree, on top of a hill where you could see everything. the small city below, the horizon, the stars in the sky. you often came here when you felt like your life came crashing down your shoulders. it didn’t feel like your own anymore, not with your future already laid out for you without you being able to control it. complaining had always felt redundant and ungrateful to you - you had everything you needed, a loving family, food on the table and your family was wealthy enough to not have to worry about money. but in return, they expected everything from you, their eldest daughter. sometimes, the pressure was too much for you but they expected you to do as they say. everything was well until they announced that you were to get married and they’d found a suitor for you. you couldn’t even protest, the decision had already been made behind your back and you couldn’t refuse. you sniffled quietly, wrapping the blanket tighter around you. you didn’t know this man; he might be a complete asshole and not treat you well at all.
the wind was biting at your skin, cold and unrelenting, and yet you felt safe here, away from all your worries. the starry sky made you feel like your worries were miniscule, reminding you that there was so much more out there for you to discover. you’d always liked the sight of stars, they always made you happy. on lucky days, you’d even get to see a few shooting stars. you’d close your eyes and clasp your hands, hopeful that whatever wish you made would come true. the crunch of leaves and twigs made you look up in alarm, scared that your parents had found out you left the estate and now found your secret hiding spot. you couldn’t quite make out the figure in the darkness, only being able to tell that a tall person was approaching you.
you were wary, inching towards the tree behind you to hide but froze when a voice rang out: “i know you’re there. i was looking for you all over the city, little one.” a man clad in a kimono was coming closer, stopping right in front of you and looking at you in disdain. your eyes lit up as you recognized him; you’d met sukuna a couple of times in the city before, mostly when you went to pick up some books to read. he’d been there one time when you were choosing your books and scoffed at your choice. you’d ask him about it, wondering why he thought that your choice was a bad one. he went on and on about how historically inaccurate the book was and that the information about curses was wrong and how an author like that should be ashamed to even publish it. you appreciated the dialogue, you liked having someone to discuss with you. your parents didn’t like that you read fantasy books and books that talked about supernatural events and beings, dubbing them as nonsense and that you should focus on your studies instead.
after your third meeting, sukuna had finally opened up and told you his name. your meetings became more frequent then but you’d never met anywhere other than the bookstore. you were surprised that he even found you here; you decided not to question him though, sukuna always seemed to know where you were, always sensing where you were headed. truthfully, you looked forward to spending time with him. he was attentive and always listened to you, barely ever talking. oddly enough, it made you feel like finally, someone was paying attention to your thoughts and needs. lately, a heavy feeling in your chest was always accompanying you when you met up with him. it was a dull ache, some kind of yearning that you couldn’t quite put a finger on. it didn’t help that you felt like you’d met him before, but you really couldn’t recall where you had met him before. “what are you doing here?” you questioned him, scooting to the side to offer him some space on the picnic blanket.
unceremoniously, he sat down and glanced over to you. he didn’t reply, simply shrugging. “why didn’t you bring a coat?” you asked another question instead, frowning at his choice of clothing. aside from his kimono, he wasn’t wearing anything else. “you’ll catch a cold!” you scolded him, swatting his arm before tugging on his sleeve and signalling him to move closer to you so you could wrap the blanket around his shoulders. you struggled a little to reach him, almost stumbling - sukuna’s arm immediately shot out to hold you so you wouldn’t fall. your cheeks flushed red and you were thankful that it was dark. you cleared your throat and sat back down, snuggling into the blanket and his side.
“by the way, i read that book you disliked the other day,” you told him, rambling about the contents of the book and what you thought of it, all while sukuna simply listened to you. he only spoke up when he challenged your way of thinking or to agree, otherwise staying silent and just watching you.
suddenly you grasped his hand in excitement, pointing at the sky. “oh, oh! look!!” sukuna’s gaze followed the direction you pointed to, spotting some shooting stars flitting across the sky. “you have to wish for something!” you squeezed his hand and nudged him, then squeezing your eyes shut to prepare yourself to wish.
“what would i even wish for?” sukuna frowned and pinched your cheek. “what do you wish for?”
“you’re not supposed to share wishes! if you do, they won’t come true,” you argued back and stuck your tongue out at him. sometimes, he really was too skeptical, never indulging in harmless fun. it might be childish to believe in these things but sometimes that little spark of hope was all you need to wait for better things. you sighed when the shooting stars disappeared and let go of his hand, screaming internally. did you really grab his hand like that? you sure hoped you didn’t unsettle him.
“i don’t think i told you, but my parents have found a suitor for me,” you confided in him quietly, staring at the grass near your feet. “i’m supposed to marry him next year but… i don’t want to, i don’t know this person and i just want to live my life with no one controlling it.”
“i see. there’s still time to get to know him, isn’t there?” you knew sukuna was trying to console you but it wasn’t exactly working. your words frustrated you a little; subconsciously, you’d hoped that he shared the same opinion and maybe, just maybe, help you do something reckless.
“i don’t want to get to know him,” you huffed and crossed your arms (sukuna thought you looked like a petulant child). “i… i already like someone.”
“you do?” sukuna looked at you surprised and that was the first time that he’d shown any other emotion than indifference. you nodded shyly, hoping that maybe he’d get the hint. you weren’t confident just yet to confess to him but maybe he’d get it from your description alone?
“i recently met him and i really like that he makes me feel like, you know, important and always pays attention to me. he doesn’t talk a lot but i think that that’s okay, we still have a silent mutual understanding, i guess. and i also think he looks really handsome! although i-”
sukuna had enough of your rambling, he felt annoyed that you were telling him about your stupid crush. whatever boy you had a crush on, they would never amount to the likes of him. why would you look at someone else when he was right there? right here, with you. sukuna reached over and grabbed your cheeks to make you look at him before pressing his lips on yours. you froze for a short moment before returning the kiss, holding onto his kimono when he wrapped his arm around your waist and pulled you closer. why would you pay attention to someone else when he could be with you? for the first time in his existence as a curse, he briefly felt human again. maybe shooting stars were the key to wishes coming true after all; in this moment he wouldn’t mind being human again, being alone with her with only the stars as your witnesses.
004.
gradually you were really starting to dislike your night shifts. usually, you’d ask to cover them because it was quiet, there were no nosy customers and the only people that ever came in so late were sleep deprived students that pulled all nighters to write papers or study. well it used to be that way until a group of, presumably, freshmen started coming more and more frequently - they wouldn’t have been so annoying if it wasn’t for them talking and laughing obnoxiously loud. they would stay until late in the night and kept ordering drinks. the audacity to have oddly specific orders, to watch you like a hawk while you were preparing their drinks, it made your blood boil. to top it all off, one of the guys kept flirting with you, even when you’d already made it obvious that you were not interested at all. no matter how uninterested and abrasive you acted, the guy would not leave you alone and his friends would try to act as wingmen. clueless and horrible wingmen.
you were glad that you were never alone during your night shifts, depending on the weekday you’d work in a team of two or threes. whenever they could, they’d cover for you and you were thankful but also felt bad, which usually resulted in you taking over anyways. you placed the basket on the counter, grabbing a towel to dry the cups you’d just washed. the chime of the doorbell made you look up, your heartbeat speeding up at the sight of sukuna coming in. like the group of freshmen, sukuna had recently started to visit the café more and more. he usually only came late at night and he probably was your favourite regular. scratch that, he was your favourite, no one was as calm as him and he never caused trouble. yeah, maybe those night shifts weren’t all that bad, you thought to yourself. you looked forward to him visiting every time you had a night shift.
“hi sukuna,” you greeted him softly and gave him a smile, placing the cup on a shelf. “the usual?” he took a seat near the bar, placing his wallet on the counter and taking off his coat. sukuna was peculiar, not particularly in a bad way. you always thought that he was a little mysterious. he always wore the same kimono - who wears kimonos everyday in this day and age anyways - the same white kimono but maybe he just owned mulitple of them. you could never tell what he was thinking and he had never shown any emotions other than brief moments of bliss when he was having his usual order. his order had always and would probably always be a simple black coffee and some daifuku mochi. it was a weird combo, you mused, but somehow fit him. it was a sharp contrast, just like his tattoos and the soft pink hair. you finished up the order, pushing the cup of coffee and the plated mochi towards him - you’d sneaked another one in just for him, knowing how much he seemed to like them. sukuna looked up at you, ready to protest but you just brushed it off, telling him that it was okay.
out of the corner of your eye you saw your not so secret admirer approaching with an empty cup and you instantly knew you were bound to be annoyed again. you sighed, returning to the cash register to take his order. “so, when am i finally going to get to take you out?” the guy asked, leaning on the counter to get closer to you. you gritted your teeth, ignoring his question and instead took the empty cup, placing it in the kitchen sink behind you.
“oh come on, don’t ignore me, baby,” he whined, not letting up until you answered. you were annoyed, so so annoyed. your co-workers were currently organizing the inventory so you were all by yourself - usually that would be fine but you’d had enough. this week has already been awful and you just wanted to be left alone. you glanced around, spotting sukuna on the side. suddenly a lightbulb went on in your head and you faced your admirer confidently.
“i’m sorry but please stop flirting with me and trying to ask me out,” you started and pointed to sukuna who was innocently taking a bite from his mochi. “i already have a boyfriend and i don’t think he appreciates you cornering me like this. you being this persistent is really annoying, girls don’t like that.”
upon hearing his name, sukuna looked up and as if on cue, he glared at your admirer. “yeah, i suggest you fuck off. get a hint, you creep, she’s mine,” he snarled, making a move towards the other guy who was already scrambling to get away and profusely apologizing. mine, mine, mine. his words kept repeating in your head, your heart squeezing painfully. was he interested in you? would he ever come to see you more than just a barista? you sighed in both relief and affliction, trudging over to sukuna.
“i’m sorry i dragged you into this,” you apologized embarrassed, shoulders drooping and you stared at the floor just so he wouldn’t see your reddened cheeks. “he’s been pestering me so much and i kind of thought that that was the only way to get him to back off.”
“i don’t mind,” sukuna replied curtly, resuming his seat. he didn’t say anything else and you slightly panicked, you wanted to keep talking to him, stay in his company for a little longer.
“ah uhm sukuna, i want to thank you! if… if you don’t mind, i would like to treat you to another drink?” you suggested, your face now beet red. this was the most straightforward you had ever been with a guy, usually too shy to make a move. in distance you could hear the chime of the doorbell and the doors slamming, indicating that the group had left. you were alone. sukuna didn’t reply at first and you were sure you’d fucked up and got ready to backtrack and laugh it off when he nodded.
“go ahead, little one,” he nodded towards the counter. “you choose the drink.”
you didn’t know why sukuna kept calling you little one but for some reason, you didn’t mind. it did however make your heart ache in what you could only describe as melancholy. you weren’t sure why. while you started brewing some green tea for the two of you, the sound of thunder rumbled in the distance. the pitter patter of raindrops against the glass front was the only sound audible in the entire café. sukuna hadn’t uttered another word, not even making a sound of acknowledgement when you handed him the cup of tea and sat next to him.
“you didn’t bring an umbrella,” you noted, looking out of the window. it was raining heavily, with no signs of it stopping anytime soon. “i guess you’ll have to stay here for a little longer, otherwise you’ll get sick. i hope you aren’t sick of me though.”
sukuna took a sip of his tea. “i don’t mind your company,” he replied, looking at you. you couldn’t tell what he was thinking but you sincerely hoped he wasn’t joking. hearing that gave you a little hope.
“i like moments like this,” you confessed to him, clutching the warm cup with your sweater paws. “having a warm cup of tea and watching the rain from the comfort of your home. or in this case, a café. the sound of rain is really calming, isn’t it? makes you forget about all your worries for a while, it’s just you and your cup of tea.”
again, sukuna didn’t reply for a while. you thought you’d bored him to death with your monologue until he spoke up: “i don’t see how it’s any different from having a cup at any time of the day.” your cup was placed back on the counter. you frowned, not sure how to explain it to him. in moments like these, sukuna seemed to be something of an old being that has seen everything, feelings now dull and locked away.
“well, see it like this. making yourself a cup of tea or coffee everyday is a normal thing to do, right? it happens almost automatically because it’s just part of your daily routine, you like how it tastes, it makes you feel more awake or helps you sleep. but… but you never really take your time to enjoy it, right?”
sukuna was contemplating, you almost giggled at the little frown on his face. but you were glad that he was willing to listen to you and discuss it with you, instead of dismissing the topic entirely. “but what does that have to do with rain?” he finally asked.
you pointed outside. “you wouldn’t really go out in this weather, right? not if you have any emergencies or urgent matters to attend to. and same goes for everyone else; it kind of… kind of forces you to stay inside, to fully enjoy your warm beverage. the sound of rain is pretty calming, it’s some kind of whitenoise that might block out intrusive thoughts, at least it does that for me. so it’s only you, the sound of rain and your cup of tea. for a few minutes, you can just relax and have a moment for yourself.”
sukuna still didn’t quite understand how humans worked. it’s been hundreds of years since he’s ceased to be human, he’s forgotten what is what like being human. what human emotions entailed. but he agreed, it has been a while since he’s felt at ease and peaceful even. it was a moment of bliss, a moment that caused a flare-up of old, buried feelings inside of him.
004.1
you still hadn’t mustered up the courage to actually ask sukuna out after you dragged him into that fake dating-situation. he did still come late at night, being the most loyal customer of the café at this point. it was almost… almost as if he’d seeked out your company. though he did tell you that he didn’t mind your company; your ego deflated a little. sukuna still wore his kimono but paired it with a thick winter coat - it was winter after all and the weather had been very extreme. the ground was covered in inches of snow and you hadn’t seen the sun in weeks. sukuna insisted on walking you home when your shift ended. you weren’t sure why because he’d never offered to do so before. you were thankful though since it was still snowing and the streets were completely empty; even though the snow looked beautiful, it was still a little eerie to walk home in this weather. especially since a lot of busses weren’t running anymore due blocked roads.
“sukuna, aren’t you cold?” you asked as you switched off the lights and fumbled with your keys. finally finding the right one, you closed up, shoving the keys back in your back and fishing out your gloves. “you don’t even wear gloves!” you gasped when you saw his bare hands, handing him one of yours. sukuna looked at you as if you were crazy.
he wasn’t cold but he couldn’t tell you that, couldn’t let you know that he was a curse. but handing him one of you gloves? you were too nice, always thinking of others first and never being selfish. sighing, he put on the glove that was uncomfortably small but he’d endure it for your sake.
“it’s been a while since we’ve had this much snow,” you mused and took a few steps around, giggling at the sound of crunching snow beneath your feet. sukuna simply followed you, looking comical with the bright yellow and tiny glove on his hand. you smiled at him, admiring how etheral he looked underneath the streetlights with the snowflakes flurrying around him and some getting stuck in his hair. your heart suddenly ached, a far away memory emerging. it was blurry and unclear, a cold night similar as this underneath the stars and a face staring at you. you couldn’t tell who it was nor were you sure whether it was just a case of déjà vu.
“you know, this kind of calls for a snowball fight,” you grinned at sukuna mischievously and grabbed some snow, beginning to form it into a ball. he raised an eyebrow and crossed his arms, looking at you defiantly.
“i’m not going to indulge in childish business like th-” he didn’t get to finish his sentence as you hurled the snowball at him and giggled like a maniac as it hit his shoulder. you quickly hid behind a bush as you quickly tried to form another, enjoying the dumbfounded look on sukuna’s face. clearly, he didn’t expect you to follow through with your plan and was caught by surprise. “oh you’re on,” he growled after a moment and grabbed himself some snow as well. you quickly threw another snowball at him, this time only being able to hit his leg. eyes widening at the sight of sukuna raising his arm to throw his snowball at you, you let out a squeak and dove behind a tree - the snowball still hit you square on your back, making you yelp at the cold feeling.
for minutes you could only hear the crunches of snow, loud laughter and snowballs hitting objects. you sat on a bench, exhausted from running and ducking away and your belly was starting to hurt from all the laughter. sukuna caught up to you, juggling a snowball in his hands. “you gonna give up?” he asked, a smirk gracing his lips. clearly he was winning, being able to aim a lot better than you. you missed him most of the time but had fun regardless.
“never!” you replied, holding out your arms to defend yourself from the incoming snowball. it never came and instead sukuna was inching closer with an evil look in his eyes. oh no. what was he up to? you yelped when you realized that he was aiming for your neck, jumping up to get away from him. sukuna was quick to react and grabbed your arm, pulling you back into his chest and holding you close, smushing the snow against your neck. “ew sukuna, stop!” you laughed and squirmed in his arms until he threw the snowball away, rubbing your back gently.
“that was really cold, you know,” you pouted, burying your face in his chest.
he wrapped his arms around you, sighing quietly. “i know, i know, sorry.”
you swore that you felt his lips on the crown of your head.
005.
you were, undoubtedly, lost. your phone was about to die and you were stranded in the middle of the city, not sure where to go. to be fair, it was very, very easy to get lost here and it was your first time visiting. your grandparents lived here and while you’ve visited before, you couldn’t quite remember anything anymore. you were a child back then. and the city had drastically changed too, making it difficult for you to navigate yourself around. though your poor sense of direction was probably at fault as well. you sighed, trying to call your grandparents again. no one was picking up. you turned your phone off to save some of the battery, maybe you could call them later.
luckily, you’d brought your cameras so you could at least keep yourself busy until someone freed you from this misery. you walked towards the nearby shrine; there didn’t seem to be any people here, it was very quiet aside from the sound of cicadas. you took a few photos before continuing your journey, soon finding yourself standing on top of the hill. the view from here was breathtaking, even more so because the sun was starting to set, painting the sky in a beautiful yellow and orange hue. you fumbled with your camera again, trying to take a photo when someone suddenly moved into your shot. you paused and looked at the person in front of you who was staring at you as well. considering they were wearing a kimono, you assumed that they must work here. did you make a mistake? maybe you weren’t supposed to take photos and this person came to tell you off.
“i’m sorry!” you said quickly, quickly shoving your camera in your bag. “am i allowed to take photos here?”
the stranger frowned at you, clearing his voice before replying: “how am i supposed to know? i don’t work here.”
you groaned, rubbing your face in embarrassment. of course you’d say something wrong, you always did. and now you probably annoyed him too - he looked really annoyed. but since he wasn’t working here and there was no one else around, you guessed you could take photos after all. there was no one to tell you off anyways. however, the stranger was still standing there, looking at you in what seemed like interest. you felt awkward just continuing your endeavors without acknowledging him, so you asked: “do you live here? i’m just visiting, so i’m not very familiar with the city.”
“you could say that,” the stranger simply replied. when he didn’t say anything else, you decided that it probably was okay if you just continued taking photos without acknowledging him. though it did make you queasy, knowing that he was just watching you. didn’t he have anything else to do? a few minutes passed. he sighed and walked over, pointing at your camera. “what are you doing?” you were surprised at how straightforward he was, not expecting to engage in a conversation with you. maybe people in this city were just extra talkative and you’d have to get used to it. your grandparents never told you about this though.
“ah i’m visiting my grandparents here and i thought i’d document my stay here. so i can look at these photos whenever i want and just have the memories on photo,” you explained and rummaged in your bag to show him the polaroids you took earlier. “i particularly like polaroids because you can’t edit or change them… whatever moment you capture, it’s true to what you saw. there’s no need to make photos beautiful when they hold a special place in your heart and are tied to a specific memory.”
the stranger nodded, pointing to your polaroid camera. “and you take them with this device?” his choice of words startled you a little, he didn’t seem to be familiar with this type of camera which you found odd. everyone knew what these were nowadays, almost everyone owned them. but you didn’t want to judge him or make him feel stupid though, patiently explaining to him how the cameras worked and where he could purchase them. he seemed to be really interested, closely inspecting the camera, turning it around and fumbling with the buttons. only after you finished rambling, you realize how much time had passed - it was almost dark now and your grandparents were probably worried sick. your phone was turned off the entire time and you forgot to call them.
“excuse me, i really need to call my grandparents!” you looked at him apologetically, leaving him with your photos and camera. normally, you would be very wary; normally, you wouldn’t even show anyone your photos, rather keeping them to yourself because they were your precious memories. but something about him resonated with you, he seemed familiar and yet he didn’t.
you found a spot a few meters away from him calling your grandparents and profusely apologizing to them for not calling sooner. you promised them to wait at a popular and well known spot nearby so they could come to pick you up since it was already getting late, then hung up. to your relief, the stranger was still standing there, watching you intently. “thank you,” you smiled as he handed you your belongings. “my grandparents are picking me up soon, thank you for keeping me company. won’t you be going home soon?”
suddenly his face expression turned rather… sad? somewhat melancholic and you feared you’d said something wrong until he shook his head. “i have to go somewhere later. let me walk you for a bit, it is dark after all.” you looked at him a little dumbfounded, not expecting him to suggest something like that.
“oh you don’t have to! i’ll totally be fine, i-” “i want to. let’s go,” he interrupted you, already beginning to move. you hastily followed him, clutching your bag in your hands. the entire walk was rather silent, none of you saying a word. it wasn’t a tense and uncomfortable silence though - you very much enjoyed his presence. it made you feel safe too, even though you’d told him earlier that you didn’t mind walking by yourself, it was comforting to know that he was by your side. you were in an unfamiliar city after all. hell you even got lost, so who were you kidding. you wondered who the stranger was, what his story was, what his personality was like. this was a one time meeting though, so you didn’t really have any hope of meeting him again. that was very unlikely.
“okay this is the spot. my grandparents are going to pick me up here, so it’s okay if you go,” you pointed at a café and gave him a reassuring smile. he didn’t look impressed. “o-oh wait, i need to thank you somehow.” you held a finger up to signal him to wait for a bit and fished out a polaroid you’d taken earlier. it was a simple shot, only the temple, bits of the trees and the sunset in the background. but you thought it was appropriate, the two of you had shared this moment after all.
“here, this is for you. it’s not a lot but i guess… it’s a really nice photo and maybe the start of your collection, if you decide to get a polaroid camera?” he took the photo from you, inspecting it before nodding and thanking you. he looked like he was about to say something else but was interrupted by some bright car lights and the sound of honks.
“ah, i have to go! it was nice meeting you,” you bid farewell to him and waved, running towards the car. sukuna watched your figure retreat, arms dropping to his sides.
006.
it was so cold, so incredibly cold. you really hated disliked these long winters, the sky was constantly dull and grey, the days were short and you hadn’t seen the sun in weeks. it made you feel sluggish and unmotivated, you were just hoping that spring was coming earlier this year. you yearned for sunshine and warmth, to be able to go outside without freezing and just spend more time outside. regardless, you held onto your daily walks because they gave you some peace of mind in your hectic life. you were approaching the last year of your studies and the amount of exams, assignments and your looming thesis were just suffocating you. but soon, soon you were done and could finally take a breather, until then, the only moments of relaxation you’d have were your walks.
despite the cold, there were a lot of people near the park; children who were engaging in snowball fights, elderly who were walking their dogs and some joggers too. your eyes were wandering around, watching all the busy people around. too absorbed in your task, you didn’t notice the man in front of you until you bumped into him. you quickly removed your earbuds and apologized to him, about to continue walking when he suddenly grabbed your arm, holding you back. you were confused, did you maybe accidently hurt him when you bumped into him? you looked him up and down to make sure that he was okay; there really wasn’t anything wrong. he let go of your arm. “is something wrong?” you asked concerned and turned to him.
“y/n?”
you froze at the mention of your name. how did he know you?
“who are you? i’ve never met you before.”
in all your past lifetimes, you’d taught him how to be human again, how there was value and joy in even the littlest of things. with each iteration of your existence, sukuna thinks that he’s learned to love you more than the last. when he sees how at ease you are spending time with him, a curse that is feared by everyone, he contemplates confessing to you. but something holds him back, it’s the fear; the fear that you won’t return his feelings. he’s seen you be with someone else, see you fall in love countless of times. he yearns for it to be him, hoping that you do choose him, love him. for thousands of years, he’s spent his time finding you - your reincarnations don’t recognize him and it pains him to get to know you anew each time but nothing pains him as much as his existence. he wants to hold you, be yours, grow old with you.
for the first time in thousands of years, sukuna wishes to be human again.
ps.: i am so sorry if i hurt your heart there omg
#jujutsu kaisen#sukuna#ryoumen sukuna#sukuna x reader#ryoumen sukuna x reader#sukuna x you#ryoumen sukuna x you#sukuna imagines#ryoumen sukuna imagines#jujutsu kaisen imagines#jujutsu kaisen fluff#fic: cynosure#writing
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r u open for sum douxie requests? Him Falling in love with king arthur's daughter💕who's innocent n kind but she isn't happy at camelot she wants to be independent n arthur's like NOPE so she runs away n meets douxie again centuries later n is now a total badass witch but she's sarcastic n mean cuz girl has been THROUGH IT😔 but slowly she warms up to him n falls in love with him all over again cuz with douxie she cant help but be soft💕😭 *u can ignore this ask if u want my English is bad😅*
i absolutely loved this request! i think i did things a bit differently but i'm a sucker for love and i couldn't help it lol. i loved writing this, thank you for requesting and i hope you like it!
•••
Back To You (Douxie x Fem!Reader)
Warnings: none i think
Genre: Fluff, some angst
Fandom: Tales of Arcadia, Wizards
Summary: See request
Word Count: 3379
Reader uses she/her pronouns!
•••
Being king Arthur’s daughter was already hard enough, but being a witch didn’t make things easier. (Y/N) loved magic, even if her father wasn’t a huge fan of it. She started taking an interest in it at a very young age, and her own aunt ended up being her teacher.
As (Y/N) got older, her magic grew stronger as well and even though she knew her father loved her, she could also see the way he looked at her sometimes; he looked at her like she was a stranger, a monster even.
Life in the palace was always a bit boring. The princess didn’t have many friends and most of the time would end up feeling lonely. But that all changed once Merlin decided to get a new apprentice.
They hit it off right away. (Y/N) was excited to have someone around her age close to her and the boy was happy to be surrounded by so many talented people.
But of course, he was a bit nervous about being so close to the princess at first, and he didn’t really understand why she was around so much until he saw her do magic. He was mesmerized and extremely surprised, to say the least.
‘’I didn’t know you could do that,’’ he said once the girl was done with her spell.
‘’What do you mean?’’ The girl asked.
‘’Well, you’re the princess and everyone in the kingdom knows that but it’s not known that you can do magic,’’ he explained.
‘’Oh,’’ she murmured, a bit sad but not surprised. ‘’Well, my father doesn’t really like magic so I guess he’s always been a bit disappointed at my love for it.’’
‘’Come on, why don’t we take a walk around the castle?’’ He offered, trying to cheer her up.
Their friendship grew stronger with every passing day, and it didn’t take long for the young boy to start developing feelings for the sweet princess. She was a really powerful witch but she still had her feet on the ground and remained kind as always; he loved that about her. He also loved her smile and the way she made him feel when they were together.
(Y/N) could tell that there was something going on with her friend; she noticed how nervous he got when she was around, the way he stuttered and blushed. She thought that it was very cute, and it didn’t take her long to realize why he’d been acting like that. But she was still afraid of being wrong, so even though she also had feelings for the boy, she remained silent.
They were oblivious about the way they felt about each other, but everyone else wasn’t. They pretty much acted like a couple already to the eyes of strangers, and also to the eyes of the king.
The relationship between Arthur and his daughter had never been worse. The more she practiced her magic, the more they grew apart. They’d barely talk to each other. (Y/N) hated this, she wanted to be close to her father, but she knew that it would be useless to try to work things out; her father disapproved of anything she did or said. She was supposed to learn how to be a proper princess and future queen, and soon it would be time for her to get married. So of course, her closeness to Merlin’s apprentice was alarming to Arthur, and he decided to confront her at dinner one night.
‘’So, tell me about this apprentice boy,’’ he said to her. He’d requested to have dinner alone with her, and they were seated face to face with each other.
‘’His name is Hisirdoux,’’ she mentioned. ‘’And is this what you wanted to talk about? My friend?’’
‘’Well, he’s not just your friend, right? Rumors travel fast inside the castle, my dear.’’
‘’We’re just friends,’’ she mumbled loud enough for the king to hear.
‘’You sound almost disappointed at those words,’’ he pointed out. He made a pause to drink some of his wine and then he looked at his daughter. ‘’I don’t like him.’’
‘’Here we go…,’’ she sighed and sank in her seat, not wanting to hear what her dad was about to say.
‘’He’s a wizard apprentice, (Y/N). Could you imagine what people would say if you even thought about being with him?’’
‘’What does it matter what people think? I can do magic, too, father. I know you’ve been hiding it from the rest of the kingdom, hiding me. I’m tired of being a secret, of not being myself.’’
‘’For the sake of the kingdom, you should get married to an appropriate suitor.’’
‘’For the sake of the kingdom? Why don’t you just admit that you can’t accept the fact that I’m a witch, father? Are you really that ashamed of me? Or are you actually afraid?’’ The princess said in a defying tone.
‘’Young lady-.’’
‘’No, you’re not gonna do this anymore,’’ she interrupted him. ‘’Why can’t you just accept me? It’s like you don’t even want me to be happy. Magic makes me happy, Douxie makes me happy and I’m tired of you trying to control me just because you can’t accept people who are different!’’ (Y/N) got up from her seat and started walking away.
‘’Where do you think you’re going?’’ Yelled her father.
She stopped walking for a second to turn around and look at him. ‘’Away from you,’’ she answered. What he didn’t know was that she really meant it; she would go as far away as possible.
…
Once she got to her room, she started packing some of her stuff, and when she was done she decided to write a letter. She knew she would go and say goodbye to Douxie, but she wanted him to know some things that she wouldn’t be able to say out loud.
A couple of minutes later, she was ready to go, to leave that place for good. It was late at night but she knew her friend would still be awake, so she decided to head over to his room. Just as she was about to walk out of her room for the last time, she heard some guards approaching. The princess cursed to herself but quickly remembered that there was another way for her to leave without being noticed, Douxie’s room and hers were connected by some secret tunnels they’d made with magic a while back, tunnels that extended throughout the entire castle.
Once she reached the boy’s door, she started knocking like crazy. Douxie opened the door almost immediately and even though he was happy to see her, he could tell that there was something wrong.
‘’(Y/N), what’s wrong?’’
‘’I’m afraid we don’t have time for that, Douxie. I don’t really know how to say this but I wanted to tell you that I’m leaving,’’ she said.
‘’What? Where?’’
‘’I don’t know, to be honest. Somewhere my father won’t find me, somewhere I can be free.’’
He was shocked, to say the least. Deep down, he knew she wasn’t happy with her life in the castle, but this news still surprised him. ‘’I’m going with you,’’ he said and started looking for some stuff to pack. She grabbed him by his shoulders and stopped him.
‘’No, Douxie. I can’t let you do that, okay? You still have a lot to learn from Merlin, I know you have potential and I just can’t take this opportunity for you.’’
‘’But I want to be with you, wherever you go.’’
‘’Trust me, there’s nothing I’d want more, but we can’t,’’ she paused to take a deep breath; she could already feel the tears forming in her eyes. ‘’I wrote you a letter, there are some things I’d like you to know.’’ She grabbed the piece of paper and handed it to him.
‘’(Y/N), please…’’ He begged, he didn’t even know what he was begging for, he just knew that the situation they were in was extremely unfair.
‘’I know my father will be here any minute with his guards, you have to pretend like you haven’t seen me, okay?’’ Her tears were already falling down her cheeks, and so were his. She grabbed the boy’s hands and looked him in the eye. ‘’Promise me you’ll do that, Douxie. You have to act like you have no idea about me suddenly disappearing, yeah?’’
‘’Yeah,’’ he nodded. ‘’I promise, (Y/N).’’
She wrapped her arms around his neck and he wrapped his around her waist, holding on to each other as if their lives depended on it. When they pulled apart, they pressed their foreheads together.
‘’Thank you for everything, Douxie. I’ll miss you so much.’’
‘’I’ll miss you, too, (Y/N).’’ They finally pulled away and she walked over to his door, hoping no one would see her. She opened it a little and when she saw that no one was around, she knew it was time to leave. The girl looked back to Douxie one last time and smiled at him. When she was about to leave, she heard the boy speak. ‘’I will find you, (Y/N). I won’t stop until I do, I promise.’’
‘’I can only hope you will,’’ she said before walking away.
…
(Y/N) was right, it didn’t take long for the king and his guards to get to his room. They were looking for the princess, but she was nowhere to be found, and Douxie was just as oblivious to the situation as everyone else.
After the guards made sure she wasn’t hidden in his room, they left. As soon as the door was closed, the boy fell to the floor. He brought his knees to his chest and started crying; he just couldn’t believe what had happened. He couldn’t believe his favorite person was gone.
He knew she was a witch, a powerful one, which meant she’d be able to live for a long time, just like him, but the world was a huge place and deep down he knew there was the possibility of never seeing her again.
Douxie tried to calm himself down, took some deep breaths, and ran his hands through his hair. Then, he remembered the letter, the last piece of her that he had.
He grabbed it and quickly opened it. First, he admired her handwriting, beautiful as always and then he started reading.
Dear Douxie,
If you’re reading this, it means that I’ve finally left. Deep down I think we all knew the palace wasn’t my place, I just never belonged inside these walls, but that doesn’t erase how much it hurts me to leave you.
You changed my life, Douxie, turned all the black and white into full colour, and I couldn’t be more thankful for that. You’re so important to me, I don’t think you understand how much you matter to me. You were my first real friend, you taught me what it meant to fully trust someone with your entire heart… and I guess you also taught me what love is. It’d be useless to try and hide it any longer, it’s been a while since there was something more than just a friendship between us. I wish I’d been brave enough to tell you sooner, to do something about it, but I didn’t. All I can say right now is that I love you, that I’m in love with you and that I’ll do anything I can to go back to you; I mean it, Douxie, I won’t stop until we’re together again because I know in my heart that these feelings will never go away, you mean the world to me.
Thank you for always being there when I needed you.
(Y/N).
Douxie didn’t know when he’d started crying, but he couldn’t stop. He covered his mouth with his hand to silence a sob, and then he wiped some tears off his face.
‘’I love you, too, (Y/N), and I’ll find you, no matter what,’’ he mumbled, making a promise to her once again, and also to himself.
...
900 years later
(Y/N) was just walking around the streets of Arcadia, minding her own business when suddenly she bumped into someone.
‘’Oh, I’m so sorry, I should’ve been more careful,’’ she said, apologizing to the person in front of her.
She barely even paid attention to the whole situation and was ready to keep walking, but she stopped in her tracks when she heard a voice. The same voice she’d dreamt about hearing again, the same voice she’d missed ever since that day in the castle. He only said her name, but that was enough for her heart to start racing.
(Y/N) turned around and their eyes locked, time seemed to have stopped. She barely had any time to properly react before his arms were wrapped around her body, and instinctively her arms did the same thing.
‘’Please tell me this is not a dream,’’ he said once they pulled apart.
‘’Douxie,’’ she mumbled, still unable to believe that it was really him. He let out a sigh when he heard her; he missed hearing her say his nickname, the one she’d given to him, the one he ended up using all the time because it reminded him of her.
‘’It’s me, (Y/N), I’m here. I said I would find you, that’s what kept me going for so long.’’ He said, truly speaking from the heart.
‘’I started losing hope a long time ago, to be honest,’’ she said. She wanted to hug him again, to tell him how much she’d missed him and how she was still head over heels for him, but she couldn’t. The past had changed her, she had to change in order to survive and she’d learned to be afraid of trusting people, even the ones she loved the most.
‘’What are you even doing here, though?’’
‘’I honestly don’t know, I just kind of ended up here I guess.’’
There was a pause between them. It all happened so fast, just a few minutes ago the hope of seeing each other again was nonexistent.
‘’I missed you so much, (Y/N). There’s so much I want to talk about and so much I want to hear from you. I-I can’t believe it’s really you.’’ She smiled at him, not really knowing what to answer. ‘’I still have your letter, there hasn’t been a day in which I didn’t think about it and what you said in it.’’
(Y/N) opened her eyes. She thought about that later almost every day, also remembering her words, her confession.
Douxie noticed that there was something wrong, it was evident in her silence, in how tense she seemed. He tried to grab her hand but she refused, taking a small step backward.
‘’Hey, what’s wrong?’’ He didn’t get an answer, just a scared and worried look in response. ‘’Look, do you think you could meet me after work tonight? I’d like to catch up with you and talk about everything, I guess.’’
‘’I- uh, I don’t know, I-.’’
‘’Please, (Y/N). I think we owe it to each other.’’
She took a deep breath and made eye contact with him for a split second. ‘’Okay, tell me where do you work.’’
…
Douxie’s shift was about to end. He was nervous, he couldn’t wait to see her again. When they saw each other earlier, he noticed she was acting a bit weird. Of course, he hadn’t seen her for nine centuries, but that wasn’t the (Y/N) he remembered. She was different, distant and cold. Deep down, he even thought if maybe he’d already lost her, nine hundred years was a long time after all.
He was closing the restaurant when he saw the girl approaching him.
‘’Hey,’’ she said once they were face to face.
‘’Hi, I’m glad you came.’’ There was a small silence between them. (Y/N) started playing with her fingers, trying to calm herself down. ‘’Listen, I know it’s late but would you like to walk around while we talk?’’
‘’Of course, yeah.’’ They immediately started walking.
‘’I have so much I want to say, but first I wanna hear about you, (Y/N). What have you been up to?’’
‘’Well, trying to put these last nine centuries into words would be a bit difficult. I haven’t been doing much, really, just trying to hide my magic from everyone, seems like I’ll always have to.’’ She mumbled the last part, but he could still hear her. It was evident she was talking about her father, who she hadn't seen since that night in the castle. ‘’What about you?’’
‘’Pretty much the same thing, I guess. I don’t usually stay that much in the same place, though. You know, always looking the same could raise suspicion.’’
‘’Yeah, tell me about it. After a while some people just start spying on you because they know there's something going on, or at least that happened to me.’’
They reached a bench and decided to sit down. (Y/N) tried to keep a bit of distance between them, something that the boy noticed, and he tried to hide his sad expression at the girls' action. They stayed quiet for a bit, the girl admired the stars while also allowing herself to enjoy the boy's company, even if deep down she knew she shouldn't have.
"I'm in love with you, too," said Douxie, breaking the silence and immediately creating a bit of tension in the air. "I still do, and I know I always will; my biggest regret is not telling you sooner, when we were together back in the castle." The girl opened her mouth to say something but Douxie didn't let her, he grabbed one of her hands and slowly caressed it before he kept talking. "Finding you is what kept me going for so long, I said it earlier, but it's true. This may seem like I'm trying to rush things but I think we've been apart for too long to keep waiting, (Y/N)."
He slowly grabbed her face and ran a finger along her cheek, pulling her closer to him, but she pulled away. "I can't, Douxie. I truly can't."
"What do you mean? Did you find someone else? Do you not love me anymore? It's okay if you don't, nine centuries is a long time-."
"I do still feel things for you, but these last years have been very hard, Douxie. I've learnt not to trust people, even those closest to me. Please, don't take this personally, it's not your fault."
He slowly nodded and then made eye contact with her. "I understand, I know how you're feeling, trust me. I also understand if you're not ready, and I would wait for you for a hundred lifetimes, my dear."
"I want to be ready, Douxie, I truly do. I want to be with you, it's what I've wanted ever since we'd walk around the castle, running away from Merlin or my father." She paused for a bit, taking a deep breath; it's like she was at war with herself, she'd been for a long time, but she was tired of fighting, of hiding, she wanted to let her walls down. "Maybe we could take things slowly," she said. They looked at each other and he caressed her cheek once again.
"Of course, my love, anything you need."
She leaned on his hand and closed her eyes, enjoying his warmth after so many years. "Would you kiss me?" she asked.
He simply grabbed her face and slowly pulled her closer to him, and finally their lips touched.
"I love you so much, (Y/N)," he whispered once they pulled away.
"I love you, too, Douxie."
They sat side by side and the girl rested her head on his shoulder, and he wrapped an arm around her. They didn't say anything, they didn't have to, they both knew what they were feeling at that moment. They were finally complete, and it was like every single bad thing they had to go through was worth it, because it had led them to that moment, to their encounter.
#hisirdoux casperan#douxie casperan#hisirdoux fanfic#hisirdoux x reader#hisirdoux imagine#douxie imagine#douxie x reader#douxie fanfic#douxie#toa imagines#toa fanfic#toa x reader#toa wizards#toa#toa douxie#toa hisirdoux#toa fic#toa fanfiction#toa headcanons#toa rise of the titans#trollhunters rott
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Enhypen Little Angels Series: When they find out their s/o is pregnant
warnings: cursing, mentions of miscarriage and hospitals, collapsing, vomiting and couvade syndrome (for Sunghoon and Sunoo)
this happens before the og enha little angels
taglist: @skyaura-koo @serendipityclick @en-sun @envirae @exulansis-eun @gamezzzz
Pls tell me if I forgot anyone from the taglist and I'll fix it immediately.
I'll try to fix any grammar mistakes. Sorry for the delay
word count: 1,523 words
Lee Heeseung:
“Heeseung... What if i'm really pregnant?” Mina said bouncing on her feet.
Being nervous wasn't the words that she would use to describe how she feeling at the moment.
“If you are pregnant, then that means that our child will have the most amazing mother and the most amazing father.” He set his hands around Mina's waist, then accommodated his head on her shoulder.
“I'm not talking about that.” She sighed, looking at the ring on her finger.
“You mean... the loss?” Mina nodded, her gaze was sad and her eyes were glossy.
“It wasn't your fault jagi, and I know that you fear that the same thing will happen again, but I promise you that everything will turn out for good.” Heeseung placed a soft kiss on his wife's lips, then unified his forehead with hers.
“I think... I'll go check the test.” Mina said before placing a kiss in Heeseung's cheek and going to the bathroom to see the results.
He waited a few seconds and then...
“Heeseung, I'm actually pregnant!”
Park Jongseong
“How many times do I have to tell you that I'm fine?” Bella said looking at IV hooked on her hand.
Jay kept walking around the hospital room, he was a little bit mad, he thought that Bella hadn't taken care of herself as he told her to.
“As many times as you want, because it's not gonna work for me, or make me feel better.” He kept pacing around back and forth, trying to keep himself calm.
“If you keep rambling nothing will be solved.” Jay huffed, as he pinched the skin of his left arm.
“And if you keep dismissing your health nothing will get solved!”
Bella groaned, sometimes Jay could be way to stubborn.
“How many times do I have to tell you that I've been taking care of myself.” She pouted.
“It doesn't seem like that to me.”
Just in time the doctor appeared on the room.
“What is it doctor? Is she healthy?” She smiled at Jay and then at Bella.
“Well, there isn't any problem... Except that you have high levels of HCG.”
They both looked at the doctor completely confused.
“This high level of HCG only appears on pregnancy. Congratulations, you are pregnant.”
If they were confused before then, I don't know how to describe how they felt by the moment.
“Huh?!”
Shim Jaeyun
“Do you think is something bad?”
Jake shook his head, while looking around the doctor's office. He was way more anxious than what he showed, but he tried his best to stay calm for Teagan.
It had been days since Teagan started vomiting and having nausea, to the point that she spent most days locked in the bathroom and nearly fell down the stairs because of how dizzy she felt.
“I'm done! I'm taking you to the doctors!”
Teagan looked at him dumbfounded. Why did he wanted to take her to the doctors so suddenly.
“But I feel fine.”
“Being fine is not nearly falling down the stairs because of dizziness.”
Teagan hated hospitals with all her might, and always tried everything to avoid them, but guess who still drag her to the hospital? Jake!
The doctor finally entered the office, making the couple turn their gaze to him.
He gave them a small smile, before saying:
“I already have your lab results...”
Jake grabbed his wife's hand, trying to calm himself down a little and also reassuring her that everything will be okay.
In the best case he thought you had a stomach bug. In the worst case you could some kind of terminal illness.
... But gladly those weren't the cases.
“It seems like you have high levels of human chorionic gonadotropin.” Teagan looked at the doctor with a dumbfounded gaze.
“What those that mean?” Teagan looked at the doctor and then looked at Jake who was in shock, but then spoke.
“It means... that you are pregnant.”
Park Sunghoon
... It started when Sunghoon started having symptoms. Hyeyoung noticed how tired Sunghoon was does days and how he started having cravings... A lot of cravings.
“And can you please add an extra order of fries please?” “Thank you.”
He hanged up on the call while Hyeyoung looked at him weirded out.
“You sure you are okay?” She walked up to him, seating beside him on the sofa.
“Yeah, why wouldn't I be?”
“Well... because you are acting like a pregnant woman.”
Sunghoon giggled a little, before he realised that...
“Hyeyoung? When was the last time that you had your period?” The girl looked down for moment, and then she finally realised what was going on.
Now they were both looking at the positive pregnancy on their hands.
“Oh shit!”
“OH HOLY SHIT!”
Kim Sunoo
Another case of couvade syndrome...
“Ah! Noona! Sunoo-Hyung just fainted!” Aera ran to the studio and saw the boys fanning Sunoo to make him feel better.
Sunno saw Aera's worried expression and then smiled at her to ease her up.
“I'm fine jagiya. I'm just tired.” He stood up with the help of his oldest members.
He walked up to Aera, who changed her expression suddenly, she started feeling way to dizzy and all off the sudden she lost her balance and collapse on Sunoo's.
The rest of the members started shouting worriedly and asked the staff to call medical help.
“I guess we have the same condition or something.” Sunoo spoke when they where both in the doctors office waiting for both of their results.
“It's probably the flu, or a cold is kicking our butts.” Aera chucked and Sunoo giggled a little.
The doctor entered the room, with the results on his hands.
“Well it seems like Sunoo is pretty healthy and there is no reason for your collapse, except that you have couvade syndrome.” He frowned at the doctors words wanting a clear explanation.
“It's when a partner presents the same symptoms as their pregnant partner.” Aera was the one frowning at that moment. Was the doctor saying what she thought he was saying?
“I'm sorry, but my wife is not...”
“The fuck?! She's pregnant?!”
Yang Jungwon
This boy rushed to the hospital the moment that he got a call from her mom, saying that Mirae had fallen down the stairs.
He freaked out, but when he got there Mirae explained him that she had blacked out and that made her fall down three steps of stairs.
“Are you sure you don't feel pain or anything?” Jungwon played with her hair, while he sat on her hospital bed.
“Wonie, I'm fine, it's just a small bruise”
“And a concussion.” Mirae's mother blurted that out of nowhere. Which made the girl murmured a "Mom" angrily.
“Ah! I guess I'll stay up with you all night.” He said rubbing her shoulders.
“I also have something else to tell you...” She grabbed a strand of hair and started playing with it.
“Hmm?” Jungwon payed all his attention ontu her.
“The doctor did a few tests... Everything's okay, but...” She passed and stayed quiet for while.
“What's wrong Rae, you can tell me anything, remember?” Jungwon smiled showing his cute dimples.
Mirae sighed, inhaled... Then exhaled.
“I'm pregnant.”
Jungwon seemed in shock by what she had just blurted out, but then started laughing immediately.
He was happy, obviously he was... But then he paused.
“When did I made you a baby?”
Nishimura Riki
They where both visiting Niki's parents in Japan, they where on vacations so they used that to pay a visit to them.
Mei Lin wasn't feeling that good throughout the whole way to her in laws house, she felt like throwing up the ride in the plane, but she thought it was just motion sickness.
“You sure you are okay? If you don't feel well enough, we can stay at the hotel and go tomorrow.” Niki wasn't that sure of what to do at the moment, but he thought it would pass in a few hours.
“No, I think I still feel bad because of the flight, but it'll pass in a few minutes, I promise.” She said patting Niki's head before calling over a taxi.
They got home pretty fast and had dinner. They were both enjoying their time, but something about the food just made Mei feel nauseated. So she covered her mouth and nose with her left hand.
The family noticed pretty fast and Niki's sister was already looking for a pill to calm Mei's stomach down.
While Niki was rubbing her back, his mother commented.
“You know, this reminds me of the symptoms I had when I had a few weeks of pregnancy with Riki.” She laughed it off, but something about just made the rest of the family including Mei freeze.
“I think... I'll just go get a pregnancy test.”
Everybody's eyes widened and the thought of their daughter in law being pregnant was kinda shocking.
An hour later, a positive pregnacy test was on the couple's hands.
Niki and Mei were both in complete shock, they were happy of course... But still shocked.
“I wasn't expecting you guys to take me seriously when I said «I want grandchildren as soon as possible.»”
#enhypenwriters#enhypen#enhypen imagines#enhypen oneshots#enhypen ot7#jay enhypen#sunghoon enhypen#jungwon enhypen#heeseung enhypen#jake enhypen#niki enhypen#sunoo enhypen
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It's Better When The Sun Goes Down — Nanami x Reader
This is a piece for the Anilysium Server NSFW Collab! Make sure to check the masterlist to see other writer's works! This month's prompt was: "I can't hold back anymore"
I'd like to dedicate this fanfic to one of my dearest and closest friends. I'm not a Nanami simp myself, but they are. And I have fun writing for Nanami, and also I love writing angsty things and flawed characters. Reg, I hope you enjoy this as much as you enjoy my more casual writing.
(it's pink bcs youre Chancho)
Word Count: 5.4K
Warnings: Mentions of breakup and heartbreak, alcohol and drug consuption, public sex, ghosting, lots and lots of angst. This does not have a happy ending. This is also non proof read bcs I kinda left it to the last minute I'm sorry, I'll go back and edit it when I am not in a rush dcj nd
Summary: Nanami’s return to the Sorcerer life wasn’t so bad. It could be better if Gojo wasn’t determined to get him back with his ex. As Nanami tries to get on good terms with them, things get out of control, only to end up where it all began.
I made this playlist while writing, in case you wanna listen to it while reading. Preferably listen to it without the shuffle, but you can hear it on shuffle, no biggie.
Nanami had forgotten how painfully unbearable Gojo could be. His return as a Sorcerer had been nothing out of the ordinary for a Sorcerer's standards. Missions here and there, or watching over some of Gojo's students. But God, he had surely stepped out of the line this time.
He couldn't even begin to explain how much he hated his current situation. Fighting by your side for the first time in years felt like rubbing hot oil on an open wound. The uncomfortable ignoring the elephant in the room between you two, as you two tracked and fought what felt like a million Curses.
When the adrenaline was at its peak, it felt almost nostalgic; though he'd then remembered everything else and immediately made his own reality bitter and awkward. Overshadowed by the advantage of years of experience ahead of him made him resent you even more. He knew it was childish and pointless to keep remembering everything that happened between you two, but that bittersweet memory would most likely keep him at bay.
You were still strong, witty, fearless, reckless and quick to act and defend yourself. The way you moved looked more swiftly and coordinated than you did back in your student days. Almost as if you were a professional dancer. He hated every bit of it. He couldn’t stop looking at you, thinking about you, and the possibilities of what you two would have become.
After the mission was over, no words were exchanged between you two. Aside from the: "Are you alright?" He told you as you simply gave him a thumbs up as you caught your breath drenched in sweat. An entire ride in an uncomfortable silence, until he reached the school and you got out of the car.
"Thanks. You did a great job. Keep it up" You said. Cold, and straight to the point. Closing his car door before he could reply. And soon, you were gone.
As Nanami tried to get his mind off the mission, Gojo made it difficult. He called him to ask for the details of the mission. He seemed amused and intrigued, as clearly you hadn't told him shit. And honestly, he could understand why. Gojo was meddling on things that weren’t his business, and things that had died a long time ago.
"Why are you interrogating me, Gojo?" He asked as he pressed hisnfingers on the bridge of his nose. "Ask your underling…"
"Because that jerk left for the bar as soon as they arrived" He explained. "And I know better than to annoy a drunk [Name], It took me a while but...I finally learned my lesson" He chuckled. “I knew they could hit hard, but damn, I had a big ass bruise…” Nanami could almost hear his stupid grin.
"You make it sound like it's a recurrent event" Nanami pointed out, slightly surprised as he didn't know you were a drinker.
"Oh, Nanami-kun, you really know nothing huh?" Gojo said, smiling widely as he had managed to manipulate Nanami into asking.
"Know what?" Nanami hissed as he now swore he could hear Nanami creepily grinning at his phone.
"No, nothing!” Gojo said as if it were nothing; trying and succeeding at peeking at Nanami’s curiosity “I'm not gonna talk over depressing things on the phone. Gotta go, bye! Kith kith, Kento-kun" Gojo sang and hung up, as he smirked, proud of his little mischief. He sighed deeply as he stretched in his bed. "Soon, those two will be back together" he smirked to himself.
Nanami hissed a curse under his breath as he locked his phone and threw it on his bed and went to the kitchen. If he had understood well, Gojo had just hinted at a possible drinking problem. He tried shaking his mind off of it. You couldn't, could you? You weren’t a drinker...You weren’t the last time he saw you. You were able to party and have fun without having to intoxicate yourself.
You were wild, cheerful, unpredictable. Everything he was not. And that’s what had made him fall in love with you back in your school days. You were so laid back, he could feel it permeating into him when you two hung out. The few times he’d broken rules was because you’d been the bad influence, however, you somehow managed to get away with it, and leave him with some distant memory in which he felt actually glad to be alive. He usually felt like he was walking on a cloud stuck in time, being present and enjoying the little things that made his everyday memories.
He’d really screwed up after breaking up with you...if he could call that a breakup... His life took a dramatic turn. And then, he turned his back to this world, and got immersed in the gray life the average man in Japan had. Away from what he's familiar with, away from his friends, away from you.
And now, apparently, you had a drinking habit. He wondered if he had caused it, or if he was one of the reasons behind it. The guilt started creeping in. The same guilt and regret he felt after ghosting on you. Not being able to bring himself to properly end things with you.
The guilt he’d managed to swipe under the rug for so many years creeped back out, and followed him around as the afternoon went by. After having a shower, changing into more comfortable clothes and in a lame attempt to cook dinner, he decided to test his luck. He put on a dark button down shirt and decided to go to the bar closest to the School. He felt the naive hope to find you there. However, if you had an actual problem, then his chances to see you there were higher.
Such was his surprise to find you there, trying to get rid of some insistent guy who kept talking to you despite your very obvious lack of interest. Before you could spot him, he watched you aggressively turn to the guy and talk to him in a rather rude tone. Sounding almost like a moody sailor as the guy’s face soon was washed with horror and disgust and walked away. As you turned your face back to your drink, your eyes scanned the bar, finally spotting him.
“Oh god” You whined as you pulled the glass to your lips. “It’s too early to be this drunk…” You hissed.
“Mind if I sit here?” He asked, pointing at the chair in front of you.
“Tell Gojo to go fuck himself…” You snapped at him as you stood up and stumbled your way to the bar asking for a refill. Nanami looked at you, feeling slightly sorry for your tipsy state, as he’d never seen you like that. And he knew being mad and drunk was never a good combination. As you turned around with your glass and made your way back to your table, you gave him a slightly repulsed smile. “You’re still here…”
“Gojo didn’t send me here, if that’s what you’re thinking” He replied.
“He might as well have manipulated you into doing so, has that crossed your mind?” You said with a sassy tone as you sat back down. “Why are you still standin’?”
Nanami took that as an invitation as he ignored your last comment, trying to refuse the idea that Gojo had manipulated him.
“Rough day, huh?” He said as you nodded and stared at your drink.
“Look, Kento. I’m glad that you’re back. I really am. You’re strong, and you’re smart…” You began. “But I’m gonna cut the chase, I’m kinda annoyed too. Ever since you got back, Gojo has been sticking his snobby nose into my business” You explained. “Many of the missions he sends you in, I’m supposed to be there as well, but manage to get busy by then and not go”
“So you’re actively avoiding me?”
“Yes” You replied bluntly. “Mostly because Gojo is trying very hard to bring us back together. But no, I learned my lesson the first time” You said taking a sip to your scotch, feeling it smoothly sliding down your throat, no longer feeling the burn from the alcohol.
“I haven’t apologized for that…” Nanami began.
“Don’t” You interrupted him. “It’s better this way”
“Are you sure? Because you still seem to have an issue with it…” Nanami said, managing to read you like an open book like he always did. He still had that ability.
You glared at him, angrily as you opened your mouth to snap back at him, but your mind was foggy and a big portion of your brain was focused on the little details surrounding him. His black shirt, the first buttons undone. His thick wrists, one of them hiding underneath a fancy looking watch, his blond hair pushed back, his sharp features...And god, his smell. The smell of his cologne luring you in like a fly to honey. Since any words made it to your mouth, your next step was to take another sip.
“You’re drinking too fast” He pointed out.
“None of your business” You said standing up and taking your wallet out and leaving a few bills on the tale. “I’m out” You said coldly and walked out of the bar.
Nanami sighed, frustrated that he hadn’t managed to get anything out of interaction. Aside from the pretty clear fact that you disliked him. However, he didn’t think of the possibility of you resenting him so much because you still had feelings for him.
As you walked out of the bar, the chilly wind hit the back of your neck, making you shiver. You cursed, knowing it was going to make you feel drunker faster. You made your way to the school with long steps, trying to make it to your dorm before your last drink made it to your head. Despite the cold wind, the hot tears in your eyes in a way kept your face warm. As you tried to keep yourself from crying, you heard steps behind you.
“Wait” You heard Nanami’s voice calling behind you as you stopped on command, against your own will. You swallowed the lump on your throat and managed to keep the tears still in your eyes, as you refused to look at
him. “At least let me walk you home. You can’t walk on your own like this…”
“Oh, so now you care?” You said turning around and looking at him, giving him a smug smile. “You’ve changed” You scoffed bitterly.
“Please” He said, knowing better than trying to argue with you.
Your stare on him softened, as something within you urged you to say yes. To have more time with Nanami and maybe cling to the bittersweet memories you were constantly reliving since his return.
“Fine” You said, very much to his surprise. He smiled and walked closer to you with the gentle smile that had been haunting your dreams as of lately.
“C’mon. My car is not far from here…”
You stopped coldly as he mentioned a car. Taking a second look at him, you wondered how much he’d changed. He’d become an adult through and through, hadn’t he? While you were still a mess...Or so you thought. To Nanami’s eyes, you were a far better sorcerer and warrior than him. And he envied you for it.
“Are you actually going to take me to the school?” You asked, suddenly growing suspicious of him, as you’d had plenty of experiences with strangers on the street and knew better than going into someone’s car in a drunken state.
Not that you didn’t trust Nanami. You didn’t trust yourself drunk.
“I was actually thinking of taking you somewhere for dinner and then to the school” He said.
“Not hungry”
“No, but you’re drunk. It’ll sober you up, and tomorrow morning you’ll thank me when you wake up without a hangover” He said as he walked towards his car.
“I don’t have any more money on me” You lied, looking for an excuse to avoid spending any more than necessary with him.
“I didn’t ask you if you have money” He said boldly as he managed to make you smirk for the first time since his return.
“Smooth, Nanami. You’ve grown” You said as you followed him.
The walk to his car felt like your chest burnt far more than the alcohol ever did. It felt bitter, it hurt and was nauseating. Was it really it, or was it the alcohol finally catching up with you? Like flashes of instant memories being erased from your memory, the drive to a restaurant felt like a poorly edited foreign film. The car felt like some intense themed park ride as you felt dizzy with the alcohol whispering everything you missed about him. It was gross and it was sickening.
The Ramen sign on the outside on itself managed to sober you up a little by taking your mind off Nanami. As you followed him, clumsily standing on your feet, you sat on one of the tables and tried to make sense of the dancing letters in the menu. More flashes of memories were taken off your head, as you wondered what was happening and how drunk were you for you to start blacking out.
“Not good…” you muttered under your breath.
“Did you say something?” Nanami asked.
“No. Nothing”
“How are you holding up?”
“I’m not”
“You’ll feel better in a bit. Don’t worry…” He said softly as he sipped from a soda you didn’t know he had. When had he ordered it? You looked in front of you to the nice surprise that you had one too despite not knowing how or when. “I ordered some ramen for you. Something spicy...It’ll sober you up faster”
You chuckled as you looked at him.
“And how do you know that?” You asked with a cheeky tone as he smiled softly.
“Went drinking a lot with friends from work” He said. “I learned a few things here and there”
More brief black outs kept lazily painting a rather miserable painting in your memory. As you ate your ramen, you found yourself relaxing more and more. Was it the hot spicy broth? In the beginning, the balck outs weren’t getting any less frequent, however, as the night went by, you found yourself sobering up like he said. Soon, the black outs were gone, however you were still somehow locked in a haze. Although it made sense. The amount of booze as well as the short time, it was going to take a lot more than just one hot bowl of spicy ramen to get you back to a sober state.
The conversation kept flowing comfortably as both of you ate. It was reminiscent of the old days, nostalgic and somehow morbid. As the both of you tried to grasp at the old days when your worries were limited to school work. Catching up like old friends who hadn't seen each other, as if you didn’t have hard feelings for each other.
After having finished your food, Nanami paid for both of your meals and went back out into the cold night. The sky black, stars hidden by the streetlights as you made it to his car and finally noticed the silver color in it.
As he drove back to the school, you noticed he took a small detour, instantly setting alarms in your head.
“Where are we going?” You asked, your voice considerably serious as he noticed the change in tone from the pleasant talk they were having in the restaurant.
“There’s somewhere I’d like to go…” He said as he briefly looked at you and gave you a tender smile.
That smile made your heart uncomfortably skip a beat as you hated the effect he still had on you. You didn’t dare to ask any further as you slowly recognized the route he was taking. As he slowly took one of the roads towards the edge of the city close to the coast line. He stopped in a rather deserted place, as he got off the road and stopped the car.
Despite the lack of light, aside from the few streetlights, you knew exactly where you were. A whole in your chest opened dramatically as you felt your eyes tear up and happy memories attached to the location flooded your mind.
“Kento…” You said chuckling bitterly.
“When I said I wanted to apologize, I meant it…” He said as you clenched your jaw and looked out your window, avoiding his stare.
“And I told you I didn’t want to talk about it…”
“You’re still upset about it, I get it. And I don’t blame you” He began as he felt his heart beating hard in his chest. “Look at me, please”
You wanted to say something to him. But you knew you would break down crying as soon as you opened your mouth. You took a deep breath and without saying anything you looked at him. His dark brown eyes gazing into yours, as he was looking at you with a rather pained stare.
“You remember this place, don’t you?” He asked.
A bitter laugh escaped your lips as you clicked your seatbelt, getting it off.
“I’m done” You said dryly as you opened the door and got out of the car.
“No, [Name]. Please, wait” He said as he mirrored your movements and excited the car walking around it.
“Of fuckign course I know where I am, Kento” You barked as you walked away approaching the door. “I know where I lost my fucking virginity, okay?” You barked as you stopped coldly and looked at him, tears finally streaming off your face. “Look, I’ll make us a favour and summarize this conversation. Yes, you’re a fucking asshole for just taking off one day and completely disappearing. Yes, I’m still mad about it. No, I won’t take your apology. No, I don’t care about whatever shitty excuse you have for me to listen to you. You bringing me here out of all places isn’t going to change shit…” You spat all in one breath as you stopped and took a deep breath.
“I loved you, Kento. I really did. And it hurt to have you just dissipate like you were a hallucination or something...You were my first kiss, my first love, my first everything! And one day I lost all of that. You ruined sex for me!” You yelled angrily. “I could never hold, kiss or sleep with anyone, because at some point I’d see your stupid face, and then be incredibly underwhelmed because I would not enjoy sex. I can’t feel anything anymore, Kento...The only way I can actually enjoy those things is by getting drunk or high” You admitted. “I can’t walk into bookstores, nor eat sandwiches or diet coke, nor drink tea because all those things remind me of you. And yes, it’s lame that all these years later I still care about those things. And this is why I can’t forgive you” You cried, as your voice shook.
Nanami’s heart broke little by little at each one of your words. He knew he’d screwed up and had hurt you deeply. But he wasn’t aware of the actual impact. He clenched his jaw as he felt his chest tight and a lump on his throat. Now the drinking problem made sense. Gojo had painted it like you were an alcoholic, but it wasn’t exactly the case. So you’d gone to the bar to get it off with some stranger, probably pretending it was him.
The dizzying pain and weight of his mistakes blinded him for a second as he walked towards you as you kept bitterly complaining. As you tried to walk away, you made a very poor effort as he caught up with you and cupped your face in his hands, bringing you closer to him and shutting you up by pressing his lips against you.
The sudden surprise made your heart stop. Your mind turning numb and blank at once as you struggled to bring yourself to push him away. However, truth be told, you didn't want to push him away. The poor attempt to push him away was more than obvious. The strong fighter you were, barely making any physical effort. Nanami's hands wrapped around your back and pulled you close, squeezing you against him as he sighed into the kiss.
Finally kissing him back, you locked your lips against his desperately, eager to taste the lips you've been dreading in your dreams. Clinging to him like he was going to disappear again, a soft whimper escaped your mouth. Your chest pressing against him as he felt his own world getting blurry.
He broke the kiss pulling away as he pressed his forehead against yours.
“You have no idea how much I missed you” He whispered as you clung to him.
“I-I…” You stuttered, the words tasting bitter before they even made it to your mouth. “Fuck, I want you, Kento” You growled as he pulled you in, kissing you hungrily again.
His hands posessively clinging to you as he slowly guided you back to the car. One step at the time as you both melted in a hungry sour kiss. As you ran out of breath, you pulled away, gasping for air as you gripped his collar in your hands.
“I can’t hold back anymore” You said as you pulled away and grabbed his hand, walking back to his car.
Your words unleashed a shiver down his spine as his heart skipped a beat and raced like crazy, as his pants started feeling tighter on his crotch. He chuckled softly as he realized his own judgement seemed to have disappeared with that first kiss. And before you could even make it to his car, he gripped your hips and spun you around as he bumped his forehead against yours.
“I can’t either” He admitted as he guided you to the car’s hood and pulled you over it. Ass you sat on the warm hood, he got between your legs and you wasted no time wrapping them around his waist. He grunted softly feeling your crotch against his as you pulled him closer to seal your lips together.
As you soon were absorbed by the dizziness of your rising heat, his hand went to your bare thighs as he slowly caressed your skin, going up and lifting your skirt up in the process. A soft moan slid into his mouth as he gripped your ass softly and squeezed it. The way your skin got covered in goosebumps and how you jerked your hips made him moan in response.
It felt good, and intoxicating. The driving desire burning his insides. The feeling of desiring to taste you all over and have you shaking underneath him. God, he’d missed that particular rush of adrenaline. His body reacting to the deeply buried memories now loose. He felt like he was in the best high he’d experienced. Lightheadedness and presence in the moment, he hadn’t felt this alive in so long.
Your hands were slowly undoing his buttoned shirt and were quick to explore his warm skin. He pulled away from the kiss, gasping as he looked at you. Your devilish smile matching your hungry stare. You leaned forward kissing his neck, nibbling on his skin every now and then. His hand gripped your hair tightly, pulling it lightly, making you look up at him as he stared at you.
He leaned forward, kissing you once more, this time a lot more slow and a lot more tender. It was sweet and it was slow and it took you by surprise. You felt his sweet kiss begging you, still holding on to the feelings you both decided to drown unsuccessfully. It almost hurt. It was the kind of kiss that told you how much you missed and needed each other. How much you regretted the mistakes you’ve done.
As you melted against his lips, his hands slowly slid your panties off. You helped him lifting your hips a little but as you giggled against his lips.
“Eager?” You said with a playful smirk.
“You have no idea” He replied as he took off your panties and shoved them in his back pocket.
His hand made it back to your thigh, slowly going up until he palmed your hot sex. Stealing a gasp out of your mouth, he teasingly ran one of his fingers through your dripping slit, making him smile satisfied.
“I’m not the only one, huh?” He said as you looked at him with lustful eyes.
You took his glasses off and set them aside. You were about to go back to kissing his neck when he slid one finger inside of you effortlessly. A rather loud moan escaped your lips as you shut your eyes closed feeling your entire body tingle in a way you hadn’t felt in years. You smiled satisfied as you continued kissing his neck. Slowly, he got another finger inside. The delicious stretch of his second finger prompting you to bite his neck softly making him growl your name softly. His fingers explored the whole he knew so well, as he found your sweet spot almost by muscle memory. More moans came out of your throat sounding like music to his ears.
“Fuck, Kento” You hissed as you took off your top, not caring that you were outdoors and by the road. Up to this point, you were so pent up, you simply craved him like you’d never craved anything before.
Nanami wasted no time and kissed your neck, going down to your neck, gently biting your skin every now and then. Sucking delicately on your skin, leaving marks that wouldn’t last long. He pulle dhis fingers out of you, clinging to your body desperately. As you laid on the car’s hood, you devoured him with your lustful eyes, begging him to get on top of you. Wearing just your skirt by this point, Nanami groaned at the plain sight of you.
He undid his belt and his pants. Your hands playfully teasing your own body in an attempt to drive him crazier and crazier. He cursed under his breath as he couldn’t take it any longer. He pulled his painfully hard erection out of his pants. You watched hi, intrigued, stretching your hands towards him, gently gripping his dick. His breath hitched and you smiled proudly.
Nanami leaned over the car hood, slowly getting on top of you, his shaft resting on your belly as he looked at how much deep could he go inside of you. His tip almost reaching you belly button, as the idea alone made a shiver run down his spine.
"Please, Kento" you gasped, need dripping from your voice as you caressed his dick
He growled softly as he pulled away softly, aligning against your entrance and slowly going in. You gasped, pushing your head back and pressing your hips against his making him go deeper.
Hissing your name, he jerked his hips, his tip.kissing your cervix as sudden rush of pain jolted through your body, followed by pleasure. You dug your nails in his shoulders as he thrusted back and forth, hitting all the right spots. The sound of his gasps and grunts hypnotizing as you got wetter by the second. His length coated in your juices, echoing in lewd wet noises.
He was rough. He usually was. Back in student days, he was particularly rough. As quiet and collected as he seemed, he sure got his stress out if his body through wild sex.
Relentlessly pushing against you, stretching you in such a delicious way only he knew how. Strong and aggressive movements as your walls swallowed him whole every time, breathless moans escaping your lips with every push. The cool wind kissing your skin, only enhancing his warmth.
As you felt your orgasm progressively approaching, the realization of how addicted you were to him hit you. He was everything you desired. And it was wrong. Before the feeling of uneasiness started to sink in, a sudden electric rush ran through your body. Painfully and soothing, as you tightly clenched around himbsoon numbed your mind.
As you came around him, your walls sucked him in tightly, as he was right over the brink, your velvet flesh pushed him off the edge. He didn't have time to pull out. And honestly, he didn't want to pull out. The way your walls milked him felt delicious. As he rode you through your orgasm, filling you up as his head felt dizzy and the world was spinning faster than usual. His hot seed coating your insides, as you shut your eyes closed, feeling the very last of your orgasm fading away.
He pressed his forehead against yours. Loud pants echoing.
However, the world didn't quite return to its regular focus.
The rest of the night went by in a fuzzy hot mess of events. You returned to his apartment and kept feasting on each other, making up for the lost time. Both of you incredibly starved and needy, you desperately went at it over and over again. It was a rather long night. As you feared, no one made you feel as he did. All of him was addicting. His smell, his voice, his warmth, his skin...It didn’t matter how many strangers you fucked, or how drunk or high you were, he felt just right. He made you cum so easily, it seemed ridiculous everyone else couldn’t.
But you knew it was far more than that.
You were still deeply in love with him. No wonder why he had that effect on you. Just hearing his breathlessly gasp was enough to have you soaking wet and under his mercy. Between sweet kisses, fake promises and sweaty sex, he quite literally fucked you to oblivion. Until either of you could take it any longer and you two fell asleep in each other’s arms. It had been a long tiring night, as you knew many of your muscles were gonna be sore the next day. Your chest painted in red and blue bruises.
It was possibly one of the best night sleeps he’d had. In such a long time. The uncomfortable hole in his chest didn’t feel so wide now. Just like you, he didn’t know how much he actually needed you until now. His regrets, his guilt, the thoughts haunting him on how much of a jerk he’d been when he simply took off...All those feelings went away for a night. As he tasted the wonders of the universe under your skin. Feeling ecstatic and euphoric for the first time in years. However, nothing could’ve prepared Nanami for what he was about to experience when he woke up.
~
“What the hell is this?” Gojo asked as he waved around the folder you’d left a few hours earlier in the Headmaster’s office.
“Why the fuck do you care?” You said as you grabbed it, ripping it off his hands.
“You’re seriously leaving for Kyoto?” He whined.
“So my transfer was accepted? Great!” You said sarcastically as you opened the folder and saw the Headmaster’s seal at the bottom.
“What about Nanami-kun?” Gojo replied as the very last string of your patience snapped.
“Oh, fuck you, Gojo! You tried to force us back together, but it’s not going to happen” You snapped. “I’m done. I’m done with him, and I’m done with you sticking your nose in my business”
“Do you really think that running away will solve anything? You’ll still be depressed as hell”
“The less I know about him, the better” You said as you turned around, hot tears blurring your sight as you headed with long steps towards your room. “I don’t trust myself around him…” You whispered. “He’s my weakness Gojo, I can’t let that happen…” You said coldly.
You’d left that morning very early, before Nanami woke up. And you left leaving no trace of you ever being there. Unintentionally doing the same he did. It was unintentional because you hadn’t done it out of spite. Your thought process had been simply. You preferred to not have that conversation and simply leave without him noticing. You had had the exact same thought process Nanami had had all those years ago.
You didn’t waste time and soon started packing your things to leave for Kyoto right away.
#jjk smut#jjk fanfic#jjk x reader#jjk x you#jujutsu kaisen#jujutsu kaisen fanfic#jujutsu kaisen imagines#nanami kento#nanami x you#nanami kento imagines#nanami x reader#nanami angst#server collab
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What You Fight About
part 2
A/N: just something I thought about
Headcanon: what you two would fight about the most
Warnings: toxic behaviors, yelling, cursing, angst
Midoriya Izuku:
his absence
being the number one hero is demanding
it’s also been his dream since he could remember
you understood that, but that didn’t mean it didn’t frustrate you when he’d disappear for days at a time
izuku tries to balance his job and home life
but it isn't enough
~~~
You and Izuku don’t fight much. In fact, you never really do. You’re both so compromising that disagreements rarely happen.
But when your kid is involved, that complacency slips away. Even when it comes to one another.
“I’m done talking about this.”
“Honey, why won’t you just listen to me?” he begged, but the irritation in his tone gave it more sharpness than he intended. “[S/N] doesn’t need the tutor. It’s just the teacher.”
You began to pick up the leftover toys from floor more so to expel pent up energy rather than to simply clean. You scoffed, shaking your head. “You don’t know what you’re talking about.”
“Excuse me?” Midoriya snipped. His eyes followed you as you discarded the toys and crossed your arms beside the couch, finally giving him your attention. “I think I know my own son, Y/N.”
Izuku cared so much for your child and you knew that. But that underlying message your brain processed within his words pissed you off.
“And you think I don’t?”
“I just don’t think you’re giving him enough credit.”
An incredulous laugh left your lips before they moved into a frown. “He’s failing 4th grade, Izuku. We can’t move him to a different classroom every time he gets a bad grade. At some point, we have to take responsibility! He needs the extra help!”
“You just don’t understand,” the hero muttered, running a hand through his hair.
What he said shouldn’t have set you off, but it did. Everything suddenly flooded your head. All the stress you had to deal with alone bubbled up your throat and exploded.
“No, you don’t understand!”
“Yes I do!”
“How!? You’re barely in his fucking life anyways!”
It went silent shortly after that.
The outburst felt good, but the aftermath made your squeeze with guilt. Izuku’s frown softened into shock before melting into something deeper than pain.
Once your words finally processed through your head, you immediately tried to take it back.
“Izuku, I didn’t mean that—”
“Yes you did.”
You thickly swallowed and averted your eyes to the floor. He was right. You did. You’d been wanting to say it for so long, but this wasn’t the way you planned to deliver those thoughts.
Your gaze moved back to your husband once he gathered his duffle bag and slid on his shoes.
“Baby,” you sighed, your voice much softer than before. It was almost insane how easily the anger left you. “Where are you going?”
You wilted with his next words. “I’ll stay over at the agency. To give you some space. We’ll talk more after we’ve both cooled down,” he sadly smiled.
Despite the hurt silver-lining his green eyes, Midoriya softly held your chin and kissed your forehead. Something he always did when your disagreements didn’t end on a good note. As if to reassure you that, even though he was upset, he still loved you all the same.
And that just made you feel worse.
“’Zuku—”
“Don’t worry about [S/N]. I’ll take him to school tomorrow.” He paused to look you in your eyes. “I love you, always.”
“I love you too,” you quietly resigned and watched him disappear behind the front door leaving you to let your head fall into your hands.
Bakugo Katsuki
his jealousy
bakugo is confident in many areas of his life
it’s one of his qualities that won you over
but he still had those tiny insecurities that showed up in large ways
aka losing you
and he had no idea how to handle it
~~~
The alcohol probably wasn’t a good idea considering Bakugo was already noticeably pissed on the way to the house party. But everyone assumed it was just another one of his moods he’d get over sooner or later. He wasn’t a drinker, but a beer or two usually loosened him up.
However, your friends looked at each other with worry behind the door to the room you two were in. Despite the party lights and booming stereo, they could hear the angry muffled yelling you two were doing.
You were 100% drunk, but you were 110% sure this man was telling you to stay away from your friend. Your best friend.
“If it’s one thing you have, it’s the audacity,” you sassily quipped.
“I’m not fucking playing around with you, Y/N,” Bakugo snapped with too much bite than you cared to hear. “I want you to stay away from that two-bagged eyed bastard!”
“You always do this! Shinsou’s my friend!”
The redness in his ears wasn’t only from the drinks as his nostrils flared with barely contained irritation. “Friend my ass. You didn’t see the way he was looking at you, and that fucker had the nerve to grab you in front of me!”
“He was moving me out of the way!”
“He fucking felt you up is what he did!”
You smacked your teeth, entirely done with the argument. You weren’t getting anywhere. “Now you’re just being delusional.”
Bakugo pinched the bridge of his nose and blew out in a desperate attempt to calm himself. A feat even he was surprised about considering the situation. He tried so hard to not be as explosive, to reign in his emotions, for you. But his jealousy burned hot within his veins.
“Y/N. I’m asking you, as your man, to put some distance between you and Shinsou,” he lowly warned.
Maybe it was the wrong thing to say, but the words flew out of your mouth before you could stop them. “Like hell I will. Hitoshi’s been here longer than you have by years. I’m not gonna drop him just because you feel insecure.”
That withered away any form of self-restraint Katsuki had left. He felt exposed and hurt. And dealt with that the best way he knew how.
His hazy brain clouded over with anger and he went on the defensive.
“I bet you want him.”
“What? No I don’t?”
“You’re probably sleeping with him behind my fucking back,” he dryly laughed. “Am I not good enough anymore? Is that it?”
You were quickly sobering up. “What the fuck is wrong with you!? Of course not! I’m not a cheater!”
“Then why won’t cut him off, damn it!?”
Your voices rose in volumes too high for comfort. The crackle in his palms didn’t scare you one bit, but it was enough for Kirishima and Mina to come in and try to separate you two.
You ignored their pleading and the two of your found each other in the other’s face.
“Why are you so jealous!?”
“BECAUSE HE’S TAKING YOU AWAY FROM ME!!”
“NO HE’S NOT!
“IT’S SO EASY FOR YOU TO DEFEND HIM AND PROBABLY JUST AS EASY FOR YOU TO SPREAD YOUR FUCKING LEGS—"
A resounding slap cut him short. That seemed to snap him out of whatever alcohol induced rage he was in. However, Bakugo only had a moment to register your expression of disgust before Kirishima pulled him away.
“Fuck you, asshole” was the last thing you said before Mina lead into the hallway.
Kirishima watched his friend’s breathing turn ragged with each puff.
“Come on, man. Let’s just—”
“FUCK!” Katsuki roared before throwing a nearby water bottle to the floor. He fisted his hair and clenched his teeth.
He messed up. Big time.
And as upset as he was with himself, he couldn’t help but be even angrier at the thought of who you’d run to first.
Todoroki Shouto:
how blunt he is
he was a bit socially inept and you loved him for that
but sometimes, you get frustrated
todoroki does too because 9 times out of 10 he doesn’t understand why
when you get angry, he completely shuts down bc he doesn’t know how to handle it any other way
and it didn’t help that he was petty asf
~~~
“Okay.”
You looked up and folded your lips in a tight line. It was the same monotone answer he’d been giving you all day and it was getting on your nerves.
“Sho, baby, can you at least try and act like you somewhat care about this vacation we’re planning,” you said as sweetly as possible.
Although you were annoyed, you understood that things flew over your boyfriend’s head sometimes and, hopefully, a little nudge would point him in the right direction.
“I’m listening, prince(ss),” he dimly responded.
He didn’t bother to look up from the papers he was reading at the table and it made you huff. Folding up the magazine, you just stalked your way out of the kitchen.
“You know what? Don’t even bother. I’ll do it myself.”
That made Shouto look up. His brows furrowed in confusion and he caught your hand before you could completely pass by him. Why were you suddenly upset? He told you he was listening.
“Hey, wait. What’s wrong? Did I do something?” he asked.
You let him pull you in between his legs. He looked genuinely lost and it was enough to soften your exterior.
“I just feel like you don’t care sometimes,” you said, deciding to just be blunt.
“Huh?” he hummed. “What do you mean?”
You shrugged. “I don’t know…it just seems like you don’t have an interest in anything I have to say if it doesn’t involve hero work, your family, or something like that.”
Todoroki took offense to that. Of course he cared about what you had to say. He loved you. Just because he wasn’t gripping on to every word you spoke in mundane life didn’t mean he didn’t care.
There were ways to express his thoughts, but Shouto wasn’t always the best at gently doing it.
“I’m sorry, but I don’t agree,” he said.
You looked off to the side for a second before looking down at him. “Well that’s how I feel,” you retorted.
“I’m sorry you feel that way, but you’re wrong.”
You watched him for a moment, waiting for him to explain himself. However, he just stared back at you as if there was nothing else left to say. The silence was sickening.
You snatched your hand out his grip. “Okay, Shouto,” you bit and left.
He hadn’t heard his first name in a while.
Your boyfriend dumbly blinked already feeling more lost. He didn’t understand why you were so angry.
He called Midoriya about it and was told he was being intolerant. The entire conversation honestly made him feel like an asshole and Todoroki didn’t like that at all. So he gave you some space before finding you in the kitchen again, this time equipped to right his wrongs—even though he still wasn’t entirely sure what he did.
He called your name once and instead of responding, you just kept going about your task. That sort of miffed him, but he tried again. This time, you hummed back but the tension behind it made him feel defensive for some odd reason.
“Can we talk about this morning?”
“What? Are my feelings suddenly valid to you now?” you sarcastically replied.
Todoroki raised a sharp brow at your attitude and decided he was over it already. Here he was trying to apologize, and you were being difficult. He wouldn’t fight with you over something so insignificant.
“Fine. When you’re done with your little tantrum, we can talk about this like adults.”
You’d never spun around so quickly. “Really, Todoroki?”
Last name basis. Petty.
But he was even pettier.
“Yes, really, [L/N].”
His half-lidded bored stare made your scalp prickle.
“Fine. Me and my little tantrum are gonna go somewhere and you can plan the vacation all by yourself like the adult you are.”
“Fine. I’d probably get it done faster anyways.”
You let out an offended gasp. “Fine!”
“Fine!” he tsked, crossing his arms.
You two looked away from one another and stomped out of the room in childish anger.
#bnha headcanons#mha scenarios#bnha x reader#mha x reader#izuku x reader#todoroki x reader#midoriya izuku#katsuki bakugou#todoroki shouto#bnha#mha#bnha bakugo x reader
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