#sad nesta

[daughter-of-lethe]

Back to December

Sneak A Nessian -angsty and fluffy- OS, inspired by the lyrics of Back to December (TV)

Sneak Peak:

With the rhythmic heartbeats on her hear, she read again the card near the knob of her old appartment: Cassian & Nesta Archeron Inhale. She had not lived here for two years. Nothing Nesta had seen the lights on when she was walking around in that part of the city, and told herself "now or never, I'll go there and I'll talk to him".  Would he let her speak? Would he listened? Nesta would have understood the chains on his door, after having broken his heart at Christmas Eve two years before and having disappeared from the city, she would not want to see herself, if she were him. "You're the rock against which the surf crashes, you got this." she muttered to herself the motto of the self-defense course she had devised with Emerie, Gwyn and Cassian.  Nesta finally knocked, ready for the worst...

[the-darkestminds]

You know what I wanna see in Azriel’s book? A major emotional breakdown in which he openly cries his heart out. This man is stoic and angry and so closed off, even among friends. I’m begging him to show us even a sliver of vulnerability. Azriel, my guy, you can cry if you need to.

[washmchineheart]

kinda insane that nesta was in a house with two other people and she still unconsciously charmed it to be her friend because she was lonely

[achaotichuman]

ACOTAR Rant

Hot take, Azriel is just as bad as Cassian and Rhysand, it's just that he so happens to be an introvert while Cassian and Rhysand are extroverts.

Just because it's quiet doesn't mean his participation in Nesta and Feyre's abuse is any less impactful.

He didn't tell Feyre about the pregnancy.

He was in active participate in punishing Nesta in the hike from hell by purposefully packing her bag to be as heavy as possible.

When he saw Nesta's bruises from falling down the stairs, he assumed they were from Cassian pushing her and smiled at that.

He was a bystander as Cassian controlled Nesta down to her eating habits.

And I have plenty of reason to believe he was not placed with Cassian as one of Nesta's prison guards to make sure they didn't fuck, he was there to make absolute certain that Cassian did not let Nesta out.

He was just the only one who didn't say anything to her face, therefore he was the only member of the Inner Circle that Nesta could stand to be around. It doesn't make him a better person, he's just as bad as the rest of em.

Azriel started proclaiming his undying love to a woman who had been tortured and was currently sitting on enemy territory.

He regifted something made for a woman he sexually fantasized about and tried to fuck, to an SA survivor.

Azriel is creepy, and weird, and just as horrible as the rest of them, that's why he's Rhysand's friend.

Now, do I obsessively write about him with Eris? Of course I do! I love taking characters with the personality of a upside down goldfish in an empty tank and turning them into the object of my creative desires.

But at the end of the day, he still sucks just as much as the rest of them.

[iocaisaint]

I think the part I hate more about the HOFAS bonus chapter was actually the morning after. Ignoring IC finding out and the argument/execution talk, I despise that even though a decision had been made and it was supposed to be put to rest. The minute Rhys is away from Feyre he starts taking a go at Nesta because he knows no one else is going to stop him. I hate that Nesta is now magically bound to a court with a man who hates her and her only protection is her younger sister (who is a mother, a high lady and it quite frankly shouldn't be her job).

I despise that this is the first outside look we get into Nesta's life in the NC.... genuinely wtf

[amusingmyselfsblog]

You know one second I’m loving Nesta x Eris and reading all the fanfics where they end up together. Then I reread acosf and get a harsh reality check.

"We'll see," Cassian said, the portrait of unruffled calm. Nesta nearly snickered as he nodded toward the dagger at Eris's side.

"We have our own ways to protect ourselves against the Crown." Nesta hid her surprise. The weapons she Made shielded against the Trove? No one had told her such a thing.

Eris glowered. "Has this been the plan the whole time? To string me along, make me an enemy of my father, then use the Trove against all of us?"

"You made yourself an enemy of your father," Cassian said, smiling faintly.

"When he finds out, I wonder if he'll let your hounds rip you to shreds, or if he'll do it himself."

Eris paled slightly. "Don't you mean if he finds out?"

Cassian said nothing. Kept his face neutral. Nesta stifled her smugness and did the same.

Eris observed them. For the first time since Nesta had known the male, uncertainty banked the fire in his gaze.

And then he turned toward the other subject in his letter, facing Nesta before he asked, "And my offer for you?" Not one ounce of affection or longing laced his words.

Nesta lifted her chin, smirking at last. "I suppose once we have the Crown in our hands, the Night Court won't need you after all. Neither will I."

Like Nesta, I was rooting for y’all to get together?? What happened to the original plot of the movie? And why did this scene remove itself from my memories??

The Night Court is insufferable I swear. Nesta got a harsh reality check in hofas that she truly wasn’t one of them. Cause if it was anyone else giving that Mask over, they would’ve been celebrated.

And these were Eris’ last words to her:

She could have sworn Cassian was repressing a laugh, but she kept her gaze on Eris, who went rigid, rippling with rage. "I do not appreciate being toyed with, Nesta Archeron. My offer was sincere. Stay with the Night Court and you risk your ruin."

[fenrysmoonbeamswife]

Nesta when she first met Cassian according to whatever abusive hell ACOSF was:

"Nesta had loved Cassian since she'd first laid eyes on him. Had loved him even when she did not want to, even when she had been swallowed by despair and fear and hatred. Had loved him and destroyed herself because she didn't believe she deserved him."

Actually Nesta when she first met Cassian:

Nesta shifted her attention to Cassian, noticing that gleam—what it meant. She snarled softly, "What are you looking at?" Nesta didn't bat an eyelash as she studied the handsome features, the muscled torso. Then turned to me. Dismissing him entirely.

[fourteentrout]

Quick Nessian Interaction

But if Cassian retained more of his ACOWAR personality

"I feel like I have loved you for...for my entire existence. Like for the past five centuries, I have been waiting for something, without really knowing what it would be, and then you walked into my life and suddenly I felt complete. And falling in love with you became the most natural thing in the world. More natural than flying, more natural than fighting. Like it was what I was made for."

Nesta blinks, forcing her eyes not to burn. "You love me?" She manages, keeping her voice cool. She can't be seen like this, she can't let him see her like this. Not when she is the viper, the sharp tongued creature of cruelty. Not when he is the protector of his people, the defender of his land, and all she seems to be able to do is hurt those around her. He is the knight, and she is the dragon to be slayed, not the maiden to be loved.

But Cassian still says, "I do. More than anyone before. More than..." He swallows, the movement of his throat thick and emotion-filled. "I have never felt for anyone else the way I feel about you. I...I met you, and I simply wanted you, and I couldn't figure out why at first, but I didn't care. I didn't care that my brother thought you were vicious and unforgivable, I didn't care that you'd been labeled as difficult by everyone who didn't have the decency to get to know you, I didn't care that you didn't seem to have any desire to be nice. I didn't want you to be nice. I just wanted you. And I couldn't stop myself from falling in love with every single part of you, and I'm..." He chokes off again, rubbing at his eyes for a moment, brows pinched. When he looks at her again, there is no guard up. No shield of brutish swagger, no teasing glimmer of mirth, nothing whatsoever clouding those hazel eyes. "I'm sorry if I ever made you feel that you had to change in order for me to love you. I am sorry that I didn't do a better job of showing it. That you even have to ask." He hums slightly, not quite a chuckle. He casts his gaze to the side, as if he is almost embarrassed. "It felt so strong to me for so long that I just thought you'd know."

Nesta blinks, finding to her dismay that her eyes are wet. She tries to force her vocal chords into movement.

"You love me." She repeats. It's all she manages to choke out, any other words caught in her throat. Cassian offers a watery smile.

"I love you."

There are many things she wants to say. Why? How? What about the things I've done? What about the monster I've become? What about the monster I've always been? A part of her wants to push him away, slice into him with a knife of words that will never dislodge from his heart. Well I could never really love a bastard born brute like you. So don't bother.

But it wouldn't be the truth. And it feels like Cassian carved out a piece of his very soul and placed it in her hands, waiting to see if she would smother it or cherish it or throw it away or give it back. So dishonesty doesn't feel like an option. She swallows down her tears and fragility.

"I love you too, Cassian."

Somehow, she feels like she stands stronger after saying the words out loud. And even if she is a monster that doesn't deserve his love, the look on Cassian's face is so utterly elated that she thinks, for just a moment, that perhaps it doesn't matter. Maybe, if he can look at her that way despite it all, if he can love her that way, then maybe being a monster isn't such a bad thing.

[queenofqueensarcheron]

You would think that after centuries the IC would know how to handle a traumatized young woman with destructive coping mechanisms. Especially Cassian, a war general who we know helps the families of the deceased within the Illyrian camps after the war. We know he cares about their wellbeing even though he is hated in those camps. But he cannot understand the effect of the aftermath of this war on HIS OWN MATE someone who was human and few months prior to this war. A girl who had never worn pants let alone held a sword before ACOWAR. And you expect her to bounce back like nothing happened. I’m sorry but I can’t take ACOSF/ACOFAS Cassian seriously

[violetasteracademic]

[oversizedbats]

Nesta would be so scared to become a mother until she actually is one and then realizes how unbelievably easy it is to love her little girl and grieves her relationship with her own mother in a completely different light

[feyres-divorce-lawyer]

now what’s on your nasty old mind?

the fact that amren lied about night court policy to get nesta to comply with their shitty plan and antis will still say with their full chest that the ic had good intentions

the betrayal feyre must have felt when she found out because she thought the rest of the ic would hold rhys back from going too far only for them to have been aiding him

the fact that nesta got broken down and gaslit into thinking everything was her fault

[washmchineheart]

human nesta who was waiting for elain to get married so she could start living and traveling the continent like she wanted but never got the chance to do it I feel sick

[ladydeath-vanserra]

WHAT DO U MEAN RHYS STANS ARE SAYING NESTA SA'D CASSIAN WHATWHATWHAT

this is the direct byproduct of SJM making female characters you're "not supposed to like" sexual deviants who don't understand the concept of consent istg

also very bold words from the people who go out of their way to swear up and down that Rhys didn't sa Feyre when he point blank did On Page in several ways

"Nesta sa'd Cassian" what trashcan did yall get ur reading comprehension skills from

[iocaisaint]

one random ACOSF complaint I have, is I very much wish SJM had kept Nesta's hatred of Papa Archeron.... mourning a parent you couldn't stand is so interesting and not something that's explored in fantasy enough

[achaotichuman]

Am writing the next chapter for How Nesta Archeron Learned To Trap A Beast, and one of the scenes is pretty much just

Tamlin- *Has been kidnapped and taken to the River House against his will*

Also Tamlin- "Ick what a BLAND, COLORLESS, TACKY house you people have."