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dira333 · 1 year ago

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Kagami - unravel

repost of my AO3 30 days of writing Challenge

warning: angst

You only know what you have when you lose it. As a kid, the greatest riddle to him was how to make friends. „Be yourself.“ Tatsuya told him, so that’s what he did. It worked, kind of, but Kuroko made him understand that he also had to work on himself, learn how to trust, and be helpful. It took him even more time to unravel the mystery of friendship, but at age 30 he was the one lecturing his daughter on how to make friends in school.

As a teenager, a lot of his free time is spent wondering about love. What it is. How it could be achieved. Did he have to look for outer beauty? Alex told him no, but no one ever guided him in finding this inner beauty everyone talked about. He’s a bit ashamed that it was Akashi who taught him the most important things, at one of Kise's stupid parties, where they hid on the balcony to escape the madness and somehow started to talk. Akashi can be pretty nice and helpful if he wants.

At the age of 20, in the middle of his college years, he scores a date with the help of – no wonder – Akashi. She’s beautiful on the outside, yes, but she’s kind and a bit shy but speaks her mind if needed. She’s a riddle to him, yes, because he can never fully grasp the beauty of her mind.

He finishes college, somehow manages to play in a team with Aomine and not kill this guy every single time in practice – and marries the love of his life. Kuroko is his best man, Akashi smiling wickedly in the distance and telling everyone that the lovely couple wouldn’t be together if not for him. Well, he doesn’t really say it. He doesn’t need to, everyone already knows.

When his daughter is born, a redheaded ball of energy, every miracle in the world does not come up to her. There’s no way to explain what he feels when he sees her, when he holds her, when he knows that she belongs to him, just like his wife.

When Sacchi is one year old, the biggest task in his life is thrown upon him. He ponders how he will survive the next minute, the next hour… the next day. He worries if he can be a single father, how he has to fill the empty place where you should be. Death is a simple word, five letters, but it shatters lives.

Riddles are a funny thing. Life seems to him like threads upon threads, a messy knot, and even if you manage to unravel one knot, there are always so many more.

He’s thirty now, a single father. Sacchi is four, just starting to make friends on the playground, fighting against the shyness she has from her mother. The Generation of Miracles, he muses, consists of six people. And somehow, he muses that it must be Akashis doing, every single day he gets visited by one of them. They have done that for years now and if you count in his old teammates from Seirin, who visit just as frequently, and Tatsuya, who he is still very close… yes, Sacchi has a lot of uncles and aunts. It doesn’t fill the place of her mother, but it’s helping.

Kagami Taiga knows now how to make friends. How to keep them. Theoretically, he knows how to find love – although he still isn’t in the shape to try again soon – and he is starting to think that he knows now, how to survive a tragedy. Be yourself. Trust. Love. Try again.

#Kagami x reader #Kagami Taiga #knb angst #kuroko no basuke #knb #kuroko no basket #my writing

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girlfriendsofthegalaxy · 2 years ago

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tuesday again 4/25/22

where the fuck were we

listening

Tongue by Rêve. i do not care for this latex aurra sing album art, but this instantly went on the "somebody come fuck this (GAY)" playlist. a fun danceable party bop about oral. other than a concerning line regarding "gamey like venison", what more can you ask for. spotify

Yeah Yeah Yeah by Blood Orchid. starts out with some very straightforward drums and then gets SLUDGY. this makes me want to sing along with the chorus with as much vocal fry as i can manage. i think the band is american, but the pronunciation of "yeah" is something i have only heard from posh brits? i think it works here. spotify

Praising You (feat. Fatboy Slim) by Rita Ora. this is somewhere between a cover and a reimagining? fun if you already know and like the original, fun if you don't. short, peppy, got me through a lot of mopping on saturday. spotify

reading

very long title by susan pinsky. checked this out mostly for any advice on moving, which was limited to two paragraphs that said "get rid of everything possible, the most efficient packing is not always the thing that will get you through a move in one piece, hire people to do everything for you if possible". this was unhelpful to me.

the author is not adhd, but is writing it out of the experience of having an adhd daughter and a ton of clients who probably had adhd. it feels like it is largely geared toward people who have a wife or child with adhd. while the version i read had been updated, it did feel very out of date at several points, especially with regards to calendaring/planning systems and (if possible) forcing everyone to call you at your home phone so you can check your wall calendar that you keep on your wall and not double book yourself. like what.

while i had independently derived some of the specific tips through great trial and error and much of the book simply did not apply to me, it did give some interesting background on why specific things (open storage, clear bins, open shelving, the concept of having one or two shelves free as a staging area in each place you have shelves) work with rather than against us.

i can see this being useful to someone who has recently been diagnosed as an adult, or is managing a family with multiple adhd/otherwise neurodivergent members, but i certainly wouldn't buy it. her big thing is Get The Fuck Rid Of Your Shit while not really providing a lot of pointers on how to go about that, so i could see how pairing this with one of marie kondo's books might be helpful? neither pinsky nor kondo really give a whole lot of advice on like "so you're an adult, here are things adults have in their house to make their lives easier" so perhaps a third unknown book might complete the perfect trilogy. idk man. im cranky her advice about moving was half a page.

Witches, Princesses, and Women at Arms, a collection of erotic lesbian fairytales edited by Sacchi Green. this was objectively fine. i skipped one completely bc it would have been a fucking hysterical short skit but did NOT translate to the page at all. as is ever the case with anthologies, some of them were decent, some of them not so much, almost none will stick in my brain even though there was some very nice butch representation. the one that does stick in my brain, Woodwitch by M. Birds about a princess trying to break a familial curse re: war, and a witch who follows the army, was memorable more for its leadup and acknowledgement of how a marching army works? like yeah! historically that is how armies move and camp and feed themselves huh, this is surprisingly well-researched for lesbian erotica!

the level of explicit erotica is...sort of on the same level as most modern f/f fic? this came out a good five years ago and people sure are having sex on the page, but there's a lot of metaphor and various other veiled imagery.

unfortunately, i want to read about women gettin absolutely nasty with it. i want to read about a pussy written with the same fervor as the average m/m cock in fanfic.

it's misogyny is what it is.

watching

rewatched For A Few Dollars More (1965, dr. Leone). in my heart he fucked that old man

You Can't Win Em All (1970, dir. Collinson) bc a very western-ish screenshot had me absolutely baffled about why a mauser was in a western. this is not a western, this is about some american mercenaries during the 1922 turkish civil war. this is not a very good movie (my main beef is that it spends twenty minutes trying to convince itself why its leads should work together, and the contrivance it lands on isn't particularly compelling or comprehendible after carting through us a whole bunch of other failed inciting incidents). this movie doesn't even manage enjoyably bad, but it sure is a spectacle of a war movie. great calvary columns riding through the prettiest goddamn landscapes you've ever seen. all forms of transportation are covered, including "armored train" and "trio of biplanes". my personal tolerance for exotic travelogue movies is fairly high, yours may not be.

if you want an actual cowboy western with different triple-crossing american mercenaries played by burt lancaster and gary cooper, Vera Cruz (1954, dir. Aldrich) is like a proto-revisionist western? quite a bit darker than i expected for 1) an american western made in 2) 1954

playing

sort of tied in with the making section-- i am deeply unhappy with how much time i am spending with fallou/t 4 bc it is not a game that makes me happy. however, the startup cost to finding a new game that makes me happy is pretty steep. so i spent some time on saturday flinging games into various folders, bc i forgot that was a thing steam lets you do now. maybe a different organizational system will fix me.

do not need to look at again: lots of demos and prologues from my old job, a couple things that aren't on steam anymore, some stuff that came in bundles that i'm not interested in, any strategy games.

done: my time with this game is at an end but i may want to return to a handy list to remind myself of what i have finished. lots of short indie experiences, wolfen/stein the new order, night in the woods, the portals, firewatch, things of this nature

old faithfuls: fnv, fo4, dishonored, sable bc i love simply zooming about.

hard bounce: this is mostly to make myself stop trying to click with hollow knight. i am never going to like fiddly platformers. and that's okay.

try again later: i'm deeply annoyed i'm not clicking with hardspace shipbreaker bc on paper it's the perfect fucking game for me. in practice even after fucking around with all the sensitivities it's still too fiddly for me. i need much, much more forgiving games with a shotgun-close-enough mentality.

making

important moving prep: cleaned out the storage unit that still had the dregs of my last move plus boxes from three grandparents and my mom. this took three full fuckin days bc it was extremely hot, i had to stop to cry a bunch, and a lot of goodwill trips.

the great thing about siblings is that if you've been caretaking a family heirloom that makes you feel weird due to your fractious relationship with the dead person in question, you can foist it off to a sibling who had a completely different less fractious relationship with the dead person in question.

once again i have failed to take a pic of the baby blanket in real daylight but we are slowly chugging along, halfway through repeat 6/10

#tuesday again #tuesday again no problem

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tottymatsuno · 1 year ago

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Me and Nyaa do rock paper scissors when Totoko’s crying that nobody loves her, and sometimes argue about who’s gonna fuck her this week bc she smells straight up like fish sticks and will kick you in the face if you suggest she takes another shower, or use a lotion around the crotch area, or if you wear a mask and we both have sensitive noses so neither of us really ever wanna eat her out, but asking to just finger totoko isn’t always acceptable either bc she will straight up try to beat the breaks off of us for not munching her carpet

Meanwhile me and atsushi is like a man at a bank, hat in hand, tears in his eyes asking for a business loan. Atsushi has big dreams, he’s ahead on all of his payments to his rent, his cars paid off, his girlfriend Sacchi sitting next to him trying to vouch - you know he’s good for it. Atsushi has been coming to this bank for years as a loyal customer, hes never late returning Todomatsu. Please, just lend him three times a week. Atsushi’s therapist said if he doesn’t get fucked in the ass 3x a week or punched or otherwise dominated by a pink fruitcake then he will be on suicide watch, have a heart christmas is coming up soon. And bc his pity party works, I write a new and extended contract that Atsushi can have Todomatsu stop by for a dick appointment 3-4x a week, but not stay the night more than 2 times a month, otherwise I would have to have Iyami, Dayon, and Chibita come over and break Atsushi’s legs.

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ordinaryxxgirl · 7 months ago

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——— BASICS! ♡

NAME! ♡ - Saku, Sacchi

PRONOUNS! ♡ - She/Her

ZODIAC SIGN! ♡ - Pisces

TAKEN OR SINGLE! ♡ - Happily taken by Mysty!

——— THREE FACTS! ♡

1! ♡ - I apparently walk very heavily, so I've had to consciously be careful of how I walk...Though, sometimes, I still accidentally take my steps with all the grace of a lumbering hippo.

2! ♡ - I daydream a lot. Especially in the bathroom, ahaha, which leads to the bad habit of losing track of time in there sometimes...It'd be embarrassing to reveal WHAT I daydream about, so that's all I can say, sorry...!

3! ♡ - I happen to be an emotional eater! When I'm happy, I eat, when I'm sad, I eat...So, that means I tend to eat a lot when I don't consciously make an effort to cut back on that (and I'm not hyperfixating on whatever has my interest at that moment).

——— EXPERIENCE! ♡

PLATFORMS USED! ♡ - I’ve got experience with Facebook RP, Gaia Online RP, Tumblr, and Discord. I've been around since...2012 at the earliest, long before I came out as transgender, and while my writing muse can be sporadic, I'm still around here and on Discord!

——— MUSE PREFERENCE! ♡

MULTI OR SINGLE! ♡ - I genuinely do not care if my mutuals are a multimuse or singlemuse. I welcome everything.

FLUFF / ANGST / SMUT! ♡ - All three, natch. I lean more towards fluff and smut, but if the angst hits JUST right...Mm, is it delicious.

PLOT / MEMES! ♡ - Both! I typically tend to do ask memes these days, but I'd love the chance to do a good plot one day...Assuming I can keep my motivation for it, anyway.

tagged by: I stole it from Ceri, ahaha...

tagging: You. Them. Everyone. Anyone. No one. You're all tagged and not tagged at the same time. Enjoy.

#{out of love | ooc}

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stilouniverse · 6 months ago

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Doreen Cunningham "Il canto del mare", presentazione

Traduzione di Duccio Sacchi In autunno le balene grigie si trasferiscono dall’oceano Artico alle lagune costiere del Messico per partorire. Alla fine dell’inverno mamme e cuccioli intraprendono il viaggio di ritorno insieme. A seguire la loro straordinaria migrazione ci sono Doreen e il suo bambino Max. Tra memoir e nature writing, esplorazioni avventurose e importanti riflessioni sullo stato…

View On WordPress

#Doreen Cunnigham "Il canto del mare"#Einaudi Editore

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yegarts · 2 years ago

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Reflections on the Horizons Writers Circle by Naomi McIlwraith

Fourteen Alberta writers recently concluded their participation in the Writers’ Guild of Albera’s Horizons Writers Circle, its mentorship program for writers within the Black, Indigenous, and People of Colour (BIPOC) community, ESL, and underrepresented writers living in Edmonton. The program ran from October 2022 to March 2023, under the coordination of publisher and writer Luciana Erregue-Sacchi. Writers from diverse backgrounds in the early stages of their careers received mentorship from experienced writers in a series of workshops, panels and one-on-one activities. The program introduces new writers to the wider Edmonton community, helping them make new contacts in the industry, and thrive in their writing careers. We asked two of the participants, mentor Naomi McIlwraith and mentee K’alii Luuyaltkw to reflect on the experience for the EAC blog. (You can read mentee K’alii Luuyaltkw’s guest blog article here).

Inward Journeys and Saskatoon Pie by Naomi McIlwraith

Writing is a journey from an urge to an idea to a crafted composition. It’s this process that both intrigues and inspires me when I think of how the human brain goes from the tiniest little seed of a thought to a finished piece that has been nurtured with water and sun and love into a polished whole that is now a Saskatoon bush, bows bent with juicy fruit, in the full flush of the last two weeks of July. This to me is what mentoring looks like too, especially mentoring newer Indigenous writers with their own writing. When I went a few years ago to a strange bar somewhere in Edmonton for the 30th reunion of my high school graduation, I was struck by the bizarreness of it all. As I ruminated over the fact that we were all 48 winters old, a really rich guy from my high school days came over to commiserate with me that he’d had to settle for being a plain old doctor when he couldn’t invest all that time into being a specialist. Now it’s been 42 winters since I graduated high school, and I’m still fighting the same old battle of how to make a living as a writer, as my really rich doctor friend contemplates retirement. I am, however, the luckiest woman in the world with all the beautiful opportunities that have come to me because I chose writing, the most recent and most important a Mentorship opportunity with the Writers’ Guild of Alberta’s Horizons Writers’ Circle for BIPOC writers. A thinker, a teacher, a writer, a poet, – all these roles I love doing as I mentor new writers. I love how the Mentor/Mentee relationship is just another glorious example that the real world is better and infinitely more interesting than all being the same age at the same time. My need for Saskatoon bushes and rivers and mosquitoes and bright yellow warblers with skinny little red streaks on their feathery breasts means that I don’t fit well into a classroom with four walls. But I get to be a teacher in other creative ways. Writing has helped me find my voice, and I am vibrating with glee that I get to mentor new writers as they find their own voices. A speechless wisp of a girl 42 years ago, I’m not quite so wispy anymore and I’m not quite so speechless, and this is all because I have been blessed with the best of Mentors who have helped me not only find my voice but find myself. Voice is identity too. Part of my voice is Indigenous and part of my voice is Scottish, English, Norwegian, French, ….. And I now take quite seriously my responsibility to share all that I’ve learned and all that I’ve gained from my Mentors as I help my Indigenous Mentees find their voices and discover who they are. As a Métis woman, I am a peacemaker negotiating all of my identities, and to my role as a Mentor I bring my skills in negotiating and talking, listening and laughing and cajoling my Mentees into planting for themselves all the seeds that will ripen as their composition germinates and is refined into a delightfully finer form than the first draft. This is absolutely essential that the Mentor reject expecting perfection either from herself or from her Mentee. Perfection means paralysis: as a Mentor, therefore, I encourage my Mentees to get their words down onto paper in whatever form they land. As a Mentor, I am duty bound to show my Mentees the way to get their ideas down onto the first draft and then to point them in the direction down the trail through the second, third, fourth, and fifth drafts until they have nurtured their thoughts into the exquisite form that is now a Saskatoon bush reaching high into the sky. Writing is by nature an interior journey: thoughtful people we writers are. nêhiyaw philosopher Willie Ermine’s comment about the inner journey makes a great deal of sense to me:

The relentless subjugation of Aboriginal people and the discounting of their ideas have hurt those aboard the Aboriginal voyage of discovery into the inner space. The tribal crews, along with their knowledge and secrets, came precariously close to aborting their inward missions. Meanwhile, the Western world-view and the concomitant exploration of the outer space continued unabated for the next five centuries. Acquired knowledge and information were disseminated as if Western voyages and discoveries were the only valid sources to knowing. The alternative expeditions and discoveries in subjective inner space by Aboriginal people wait to be told (Ermine “Aboriginal Epistemology” 1995).

Subjective inner space indeed. This is what being a Mentor in an Indigenous artist context means to me, and I aim to help my Mentees find their voices and themselves in their own subjective inner spaces. My Indigenous Mentees’ stories are waiting to be told!

Nearly twenty years ago, I served as the Conference Scribe for an Indigenous Feminism Conference at the University of Alberta, and Dolores van der Wey, an Indigenous presenter, said something that became a gift and has stayed with me since. She spoke about “pause time,” which is the time a listener takes to absorb and process what she has heard from someone speaking to her. Rather than interrupt her duty to listen deeply, the listener maintains her commitment to attend to the speaker. The listener refrains from checking out of the conversation to think of how she will respond to what is being said to her, she resists the urge to impose her own thoughts on what she hears, and she accepts the invitation of the speaker to journey inward.

The listener listens, truly listens. What a gift!

This pause time is rich with potential, and this is another powerful motivator for me. I do fiercely believe that listening deeply is an Indigenous cultural practice that must continuously resist the noisy forces of a colonial world that makes it difficult to hear and to listen. I am a peacemaker, and I want to hear my Mentees thoughts fully and completely, so that I may coach them forward in the best way possible. This pause time is a gift that the listener gives to her interlocutor. It is a gift to be heard above the cacophony, and the Horizons Writers’ Circle offers Mentors and Mentees an important opportunity to hear each other deeply and meaningfully as they venture inwardly toward those tiniest little kernels of thought, thoughts as nascent as a cluster of seeds and help them grow into a beautiful juicy Saskatoon pie of a composition that we simply cannot resist!

Thank you to Ellen Kartz for being such a champion of writers and for inviting me to apply to be a Mentor, Luciana Erregue-Sacchi, Program Coordinator of the Horizons’ Writers Circle, Giorgia Severini, Executive Director of the Writers’ Guild of Alberta, and to Rona Altrows, the Edmonton Community Foundation, and the Edmonton Arts Council for supporting this important program that is so vital to the health of our community!

A writer, a teacher, a canoe paddler, a trail walker, and a deep street talker extraordinaire, Naomi McIlwraith is a Métis poet who reads and writes and listens and talks to figure things out. Moreover, Naomi writes to honour her ancestors both Indigenous and European, her Mom and Dad and the rest of her family. She also writes and talks to make peace in a dangerous world. You will find “Peacemaker” on Naomi’s resume. Her favourite words are “imagine” and “tawâw.”

Work cited Ermine, Willie. “Aboriginal Epistemology” in Southern Door: Connecting With and Maintaining Our Relations. Eds. Marie Battiste and Jean Barman. First Nations Education in Canada: The Circle Unfolds. Vancouver, BC: University of British Columbia Press, 1995.

van der Wey, Dolores. “Pause Time.” Women Writing Reading: Indigenous Feminism Conference. Edmonton: University of Alberta, August 2005.

#horizonswriterscircle #yegwrites #indigenousart #indigenous #yeg

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darthmelyanna · 8 months ago

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I find it really helpful to think about these things in terms of “this is what the individuals writing the rules care about.” The emphasis on risk and originality in the 1980s makes a lot of sense when you realize those codes were written by the coach of the first athlete to do a back handspring on balance beam.

It’s not that the FIG as a corporate body thinks artistry is feminine-coded, it’s that the people making rules for WAG right now want an emphasis on artistry and the people making rules for MAG don’t. There may be (and likely are!) gendered biases in the individuals on both committees. But these are still choices being made by individuals, and they are not required to come to these decisions together.

You can apply the same principle to other aspects that differ being MAG and WAG, even administratively. Donatella Sacchi often shows up to events she is not required to go to. Her MAG counterpart generally sends a representative. I think we can infer that Donatella thinks it’s important for her to be there personally even though she could delegate that meeting where names are drawn out of a hat.

I can’t figure out what gym fans even want with artistry lol. Back when I became a fan in 08 it was all moaning about how artistry is lost without the 10 system and now it’s complaining about how artistry is dumb and sexist

I think these are likely not the same set of fans. A lot of the "artistry is dumb and sexist" people are people whose formative experience in the sport was the Beijing quad.

But also there is a kind of ... unsophisticated view of feminism that says that because something is feminine or female coded it's for the male gaze and oppressive. And not that turning women's spaces and activities into copies of men's spaces is... not feminist or equality.

MAG fans have a point in that people asking MAG to be more like WAG are dismissing the tradition and aesthetics of that sport. But people who want to turn WAG into MAG or to merge the two sports in the name of equality are in fact asking for the men's sport to be the default.

#gymnastics

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miaouerie · 4 years ago

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@therebelcaptainnetwork Secret Santa gift for @callioope, who requested “I’ll be home for Christmas, established relationship”. Happy holidays and good tidings in the new year!

Cream room temperature butter and sugar; stir in vanilla and water. Toast pecans, add to flour, mix until blended. Cover and chill.

Bake at 350 degrees Fahrenheit; coat in powdered sugar immediately after and once again when cooled.

Jyn tucks the recipe card back in, before huffing a sigh and tugging it out of the spiralbound notebook. This cookie recipe wasn’t particularly difficult—shortbread was really just flour, butter, and sugar—but with her head where it’s at, starting from the beginning is proving difficult.

She’s had the ingredients and parchment paper and sheet pans out on the counter for hours, but she can’t bring herself to start. Today is the day that Cassian is flying home and her stomach is knotted in nerves. They had spoken on the phone last night via video call which helped soothe her worries, and while they avoided talking about the flight it still lingered in those moments of silence where she could only stare at his face on the tiny display of her phone anxiously.

You’re still going to bake the cookies though, aren’t you? Even if I won’t be there to snack on the pecans.

Of course, she had laughed, and his smile warmed her heart. Don’t worry, I’ll save some for you when you get back.

She had better get started.

read the rest on AO3!

#rebelcaptain #jyn erso #cassian andor #dailyrebelcaptain #sacchi writes #length: 2k

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inspo-blogge · 4 years ago

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chapter 1 ₪ chapter 2 ₪ chapter 3 ₪ chapter 4 ₪ chapter 5 ₪ chapters 5.5 and 6: reach your crown forward [explicit] + exhale and fold (~2k)

Jyn Erso’s best friend is worried that as a 22-year-old college student in a mess of upper division courses, Jyn doesn’t de-stress as often or as well as she should—so Jyn agrees to try out some yoga classes at the local community yoga studio, Root + Grow. The time slot she picks out of convenience turns out to be taught by a fairly attractive man named Cassian. What can possibly happen with him?

IN THIS CHAPTER: After hooking up with Cassian the night before, Jyn wakes up feeling cold in his bed.

read on AO3!

#sacchi writes

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lionofchaeronea · 2 years ago

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Saint Paul Writing, Pier Francesco Sacchi, 1520s

#art #art history #Pier Francesco Sacchi #religious art #Christian art #Christianity #Saint Paul #Apostle Paul #imaginary portrait #historical portrait #Renaissance #Renaissance art #Italian Renaissance #Cinquecento #Italian art #16th century art #National Gallery #National Gallery London

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whumpmatsus · 3 years ago

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1C for Totty? Baby brother doesn't get babied enough!!

Ultimate Whump Writing Meme! / ACCEPTING!

1. Acute infectious diseases

C: Tonsillitis

funny story, I actually had something half-started with this concept from a while ago, before I even made that whump meme... and I've been itching to finish it lately, so I slapped some paint on it to make it fit the request, wrote the rest of it up, and WHAM-BAM THANK YOU MA'AM this one was done fast!!

Totty really doesn't get babied enough, he needs to be babied more! he's the youngest, after all <3

also inspiring Oso and Kara's suggestion of taking a doll in with him... when I had my gallbladder out in high school, I brought my Gaara plushie with me lol. they let me take him in and have him with me on the bed and he was still right there when I woke up. so I dunno if any hospital would do that, but the one I went to let me take my lil plushie dude into the operating room with me! (to be fair, they probably removed him after I went under anesthesia and put him back once they were done operating, but XD)

Sometimes Totty leaves for work early in the morning, when the manager at Sutabaa schedules him for an opening shift.

That means he has to be at work by 6 A.M., forcing him to get up around 5 to ensure he grabs something to eat and cleans up and in general prepares for the day. His alarm typically wakes his brothers up a little, not all the way but enough that he finds himself quietly shushing them and telling them to go back to sleep, he’s just leaving for work and he’ll be back in the afternoon.

Today Osomatsu doesn’t remember Totty even doing that much, and today, the absence of his youngest brother next to him makes it difficult to fall back asleep. So he gets up at the ungodly hour of 7 A.M., bleary-eyed and unable to rest further, to go downstairs to the living room. At least that way he won’t disturb any of the others, and he can always nap later once he’s sufficiently tired again.

For now he busies himself with grabbing some cookies and a magazine and settling in at the table. He can entertain himself until the rest of his brothers get up, can’t he? It’s still a bit dark out, and Dad’s gone to work. Mom isn’t up yet, though… he doesn’t remember being awake all by himself in the house since he was a little kid.

… Even then, he wasn’t usually all by himself. There was almost always someone else with him. He almost wishes he woke up alongside Totty and his youngest brother didn’t have to go to work so they could enjoy the morning peace together.

Still, it’s quiet and that never lasts in this house, so he starts reading. This is a manga he’s already read before, so he knows what’s happening, and it’s predictable; that’s not a bad thing, though. It means he doesn’t need to put in a lot of brainpower to read it.

He’s nearly done with his plate of cookies and almost halfway through the manga when the front door suddenly opens.

Totty seems just as surprised to see his big brother as Osomatsu is to see his little brother. A quick glance toward the clock reveals that it’s only just after 7:30, so Totty shouldn’t be home yet.

That said… a look at Totty tells him a lot more than the time. The youngest looks like shit. His cheeks and nose are red, the kind of pinkish red that’s basically a signal to everyone else that someone isn’t doing so well. There are lines under his eyes, and there’s a paper face mask in his hand.

All in all, Osomatsu can kind of guess what’s going on, and he feels a little guilty for not noticing something was wrong. “Hey, Totty… I thought you worked till noon today?”

“Ugh…” Totty sniffles thickly, walking over to where Osomatsu is sitting. Once there, he just sort of slumps himself down on the floor. His voice is congested and hoarse, sounding like it hurts to speak. “They sent me home. I’m sick. Sacchi told me I should go to the doctor since this is like the sixth time I’ve had a sore throat in the last couple years… but…” His fist tightens around the mask as if it’s his only lifeline right now. “… I don’t wanna go alone. I hate the doctor.”

Osomatsu shuffles closer and carefully runs a hand through Totty’s hair. “Well, fuck, I could take you.”

Totty turns his eyes up a bit. Though they’ve got their usual sparkle, there’s a marked exhaustion shining in them as well. “R-really?”

“Yeah, really, you’re my baby brother! Of course I’ll take you. I don’t have anything exciting going on today, anyway.” His hand continues to make long, slow strokes through Totty’s locks. “You’re not feeling good, huh? Does your throat hurt?”

Totty laughs softly, but it lacks any real mirth. “Gee, how’d you know?” He closes his eyes, pressing his head in against his older brother’s hand. “Mmm… yeah, it’s pretty bad. If I try to talk any louder than this, I start coughing and it feels like a bee sting in my throat. And I think have a fever… I’m all achy… God, I just wanna go to bed…”

Osomatsu gives a few more pets to his baby brother’s head, then tries to pull him up into a more… vertical position. “Here, let’s get you bundled up and we’ll head over to the doctor’s office. Think you can handle a train ride?”

“Mhm… as long as you’re there.” For the most part, he lets Osomatsu move him around, feeling too tired to move himself. “Can I sleep on the way?”

“Yeah, sure! We’ll sit together and you can lean your head on my shoulder.” This time Osomatsu is determined not to miss anything. He wasn’t paying attention this morning, but that won’t happen again. He doesn’t want Totty having to be in pain speaking for himself, so he needs to make sure to note down everything that’s going on. He reaches over to touch his fingers against Totty’s neck, frowning. “Hey, this looks kinda swollen, Totty, does it―”

The instant reaction is a yelp, or as much of one as the youngest can manage. There are tears in poor Totty’s eyes immediately, and as much as he wants to move away, his current malaise prevents him from doing so. “O-ow, Osomatsu-nii-chan!!”

Osomatsu winces in sympathy. “Ah, shit, I’m sorry. Well, there’s my answer… that hurts, huh?”

“Y… yeah… k-kinda like you just poked a sunburn…”

“Yikes, fuck. I’m really sorry. I didn’t mean to hurt you. C’mon, let’s get this taken care of.” He gently tugs Totty to his feet, and somehow manages to get him into his coat with a scarf wrapped around his neck. Loosely, just to make sure it doesn’t get bumped again. “Hey, this could be your new look.”

Totty lets out a raspy giggle. “I dunno… sick chic? I don’t think it’ll catch on. I’m sure I’m making it work, though.”

Osomatsu shakes his head. “Pretty sure you can make anything work, you priss. Let me grab my wallet and leave a note for the others, okay? Just in case they wake up while we’re gone, I don’t want anybody to worry.”

“Okay… I’ll just lean on the wall for a sec and try not to fall asleep.”

He grins before giving a kiss to Totty’s cheek and hurrying upstairs. It’s not a great idea to leave the house without some money, and he doesn’t want Mom or their brothers to panic if they wake up to find the youngest and the eldest nowhere to be seen.

He also doesn’t want to disturb them, though, so he tiptoes into their bedroom to get his wallet from the table, and scrawls a quick note before heading back downstairs.

Mom + little bros―

Totty got sent home because he’s sick. Another sore throat. I’m taking him to the doctor, so don’t worry if we’re not back when you guys get up. See you soon!

Love, Osomatsu

“Th-this isn’t fair, nii-chan! How come I have to do this? Why couldn’t they just give me a pill??”

“I dunno, but this is what they recommended, Totty… like you said yourself, this is, what, the sixth sore throat you’ve had in two years? And you admitted to the doctor that it hurts to swallow and you’re having trouble breathing this time.”

“Y-yeah, well… I thought she’d just say I should use my inhaler and take some painkillers… maybe give me a prescription for an antibiotic.”

“She might still have to do that; she put that swabby thing in your throat and said she’ll call with the results tomorrow.”

“And that thing sucked! It made me cough so hard my eyes watered…”

“Yeah, I remember, I was there. I almost thought you were gonna throw up. I hate to say it, little bro, but you’re in rough shape here.”

“I know… but… but surgery?!”

“Doesn’t your throat still hurt?” Osomatsu finally sighs as he helps Totty up the stairs now that they’re back home. “You should rest your voice so this shit doesn’t get worse. The doc said your throat was really red and irritated. Do you think bitching your little heart out is gonna make it feel any better?”

As usual, everyone is huddled up in the spare room, trying to get warm under the kotatsu, when the two of them open the door. “Hey, there you guys are!” Choromatsu pipes up from his spot, where he’s reading a book. “We got your note, but it’s almost one in the afternoon now… did you guys spend like five hours at the urgent care center??”

“Not exactly,” Osomatsu replies as he guides Totty over to the couch and carefully helps him settle in. “We spent like an hour at urgent care, then they sent us to the hospital to talk to a surgeon.”

“A SURGEON?!” Choromatsu’s book is immediately abandoned in favor of zooming over to grab at Osomatsu’s collar. “What do you mean, a surgeon?! How sick is he?!”

Karamatsu has drifted over toward the sofa and set a hand on Totty’s forehead as if to confirm that, yes, things are really that bad. “Well, our dear youngest has a fever, at any rate.”

“Ow! Get off me, Fappyski!” Osomatsu smacks the third eldest’s hands away and straightens his shirt out. “Fuck, he’s not dying or anything.”

“If only,” Totty moans, nuzzling into Karamatsu’s embrace. “I’ve got… um… a-ah, shit. Do you have the discharge paper, Osomatsu-nii-chan?”

“Yeah, it’s in my pocket.” He takes it out and unfolds it, handing it over to Choromatsu. He memorized most of it already anyway, having pored over it on the train ride home. “They’re still doing that test to determine if they need to put him on antibiotics, but long story short, seeing as this is over five times he’s had a sore throat in the last two years, he needs to have his tonsils out.”

Thankfully, Choromatsu’s initial panic flattens into anxiety as he takes the paper to read. “A-ah, okay… well… that’s not so bad… I-I mean, it’s a minor surgery.”

Totty starts to wail and presses himself into Karamatsu’s chest. Even doing that, his voice is barely a whisper. “Noooo, they’re gonna cut me open and take out part of my insides! Don’t let them do it, Karamatsu-nii-chan! Don’t let them!”

“I won’t, sweet little Totty! I won’t let them!” To his credit, Karamatsu commits to it, snuggling the baby of the family even closer like he can protect Totty from the surgery. It looks to be mostly for comedic effect to diffuse tension for everyone else… though nobody can be sure with Karamatsu.

“You have to do it, you dumbass,” Ichimatsu snorts, lying down with his legs still under the kotatsu. “That shit’s infected, so you need it cut out. If you don’t get it taken care of, you’re just gonna keep getting sore throats.”

Osomatsu settles down on the couch next to Karamatsu and Totty, patting the youngest on the head. “Not even just that. He told the doctor he was having trouble breathing and swallowing this time, and that when he does swallow, it hurts like a motherfucker. You’re not getting out of this, Totty.”

Totty briefly peeks out of his Kara-cocoon. “You’re all being mean. Peer pressure. I’m gonna tell Mom.”

Jyushimatsu laughs and launches himself over to the couch. He hits the bottom of it with his head, but it doesn’t appear to have shaken him much, because he’s sitting with his legs crossed and his back pin-straight in a second. “Whaddaya think Mom’s gonna do, Totty?? You’re her baby! If you tell her you don’t wanna get the surgery, she’ll probably grab a steak knife and do it herself!”

“… Oh, my God.” Totty whimpers. “Oh, my God, you’re right.” Tears well up in his eyes, and this time they’re genuine as he leans back in against Karamatsu. “B-but I don’t want surgery! I-I’m scared… they’re not gonna let anybody else into the room… they’re gonna stick some sleepy liquid into my hand and… and everything’s gonna get dark… and I won’t have you guys or Mom or Dad there…”

The three eldest share a concerned look between them, and Ichimatsu and Jyushimatsu do the same with each other. After a moment of Totty crying, Osomatsu scoots over to make room for Choromatsu to sit down.

“I-it’s okay, Totty. Um…” He slides his hand up past Karamatsu’s arm so he can rub his baby brother’s back. “Hey, hey, it’s… it’s okay that you’re scared, you know? You remember when I had to have surgery to take my appendix out? You remember how freaked out I was when you guys showed up, and how Osomatsu had to talk for me because I was crying so hard? That’s normal.”

Osomatsu somehow manages to put his arm around all three of them. “And he still did it anyway! He was really brave, ‘cause he knew it needed to be done. And you remember how it was before? Even when they take you to surgery, we get to hug you and kiss you and slobber all over you before you go in. I bet you could even take a stuffed animal or something in with you if that’d make you feel better.”

“I wish I could t-take one of you guys,” Totty mumbles. “Just shrink you down and bring you with me.”

Karamatsu hums. “When did they schedule the surgery? I could sew up a doll that looks like one of us!”

Choromatsu glances down at the paper again. “Ah, looks like two weeks. At least you have a lot of time to prepare, Totty! You can cry a lot and be super anxious in the next couple days, then you’ll have got it all out by the time you actually go to get it done.”

“There’s really no way around it, Totty.” Ichimatsu stretches his arms so he can flick Totty’s ankle. “You don’t wanna keep getting sick, right? A lot of throat infections can probably seriously fuck up your throat, and you’ve been getting a lot. Aren’t you tired of that?”

Jyushimatsu waves his arms in the air. “Plus, we’ll get to take you home afterwards, and you’ll get lots of ice pops and ice cream and we’ll get to baby you!!”

“Yeahhhh,” Osomatsu grins. “We know you like that even though you say you don’t. Now we’ll have the perfect excuse.”

“Exactly,” Choromatsu adds in, leaning to kiss Totty’s head. “You can do it, Totty. Even if we can’t be in the room with you while it happens, we’ll be right there in the hospital waiting for you. This really is the best thing for your health. Like Ichimatsu said, repeated sore throats like this could really hurt your voice.”

“Not to mention,” Karamatsu muses, “you could post about this on your blog. I can see it now… you’ll get so many comments… so much sympathy…”

“So many people wanting to nurse you back to health and kiss your stupid face!!” is Osomatsu’s contribution.

… Well. When they all put it like that, Totty supposes that there’s no getting out of this. After all, he’s sick (pun not intended) of constantly getting sore throats in the past couple years, and if this is the only way to make it stop, he can’t really act like a coward. He already got the surgery scheduled.

Plus if his brothers are all pushing at him like this, it’s almost definitely because they think it’s the right call. Even though it’s fucking surgery.

“You guys… promise you’ll be there when I wake up?” he rasps, leaning into Karamatsu’s shoulder. “That’s… that’s all I really care about.”

Of course, he didn’t really need to worry. As soon as he says that, he’s sort of engulfed in a hug of big brothers, with everyone surrounding him and stroking his hair and kissing his face.

Yeah. They’ll all be there.

#Osomatsu san #whump #Benimatsu #Totty #Osomatsu #Allmatsu #illness #tonsillitis #caretaking #WHAT GOOD BOYS THEY'RE SO SILLY #KARA SAYING HE WON'T LET THEM EVEN THO HE KNOWS IT NEEDS DONE IS KILLING ME #Totty being babied is fucking EVERYTHING ok

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koredzas · 8 years ago

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Pier Francesco Sacchi - Saint Paul Writing. Detail. 1520

#art #renaissance #pier francesco sacchi #writing

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captainswan-asyouwish · 5 years ago

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Jennifer Morrison to Direct ‘One of Us Is Lying’ Pilot for Peacock (EXCLUSIVE)

Jennifer Morrison has signed on to direct the drama pilot “One of Us Is Lying” for NBCUniversal’s upcoming streaming service Peacock, Variety has learned exclusively.

Based on the Karen M. McManus YA book of the same name, “One of Us Is Lying” tells the story of what happens when five high schoolers walk into detention and only four make it out alive. It was originally in development at the NBCU cable channel E! before moving to Peacock back in August.

This will mark the first pilot Morrison has directed. She previously directed an episode of the HBO series “Euphoria” as well as the feature film “Sun Dogs” and the short film “Warning Labels.” She is primarily known for her acting work, having starred in shows like “House” and “Once Upon a Time.” She will also appear in the fourth season of “This Is Us,” which debuted on NBC on Tuesday.

She is repped by CAA and Anonymous Content.

Erica Saleh will write the pilot, with John Sacchi and Matt Groesch executive producing via Sacchi’s 5 More Minutes Productions. Universal Content Productions will produce.

Peacock is also currently working on a “Punky Brewster” revival as part of its initial originals slate. Among the projects ordered to series at the nascent streamer are a revival of “Saved by the Bell,” a “Battlestar Galactica” reboot from executive producer Sam Esmail, a series adaptation of Aldous Huxley’s “Brave New World,” and a third season of the former NBC comedy “AP Bio.” The service is expected to launch in April 2020.

(X)

#it's now official #so talented woman #not surprising she is so in-demand #proud #Jennifer Morrison #One Of Us Is Lying

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yegarts · 2 years ago

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Reflections on the Horizons Writers Circle by mentee K’alii Luuyaltkw

Fourteen Alberta writers recently concluded their participation in the Writers’ Guild of Albera’s Horizons Writers Circle, its mentorship program for writers within the Black, Indigenous, and People of Colour (BIPOC) community, ESL, and underrepresented writers living in Edmonton. The program ran from October 2022 to March 2023, under the coordination of publisher and writer Luciana Erregue-Sacchi. Writers from diverse backgrounds in the early stages of their careers received mentorship from experienced writers in a series of workshops, panels and one-on-one activities. The program introduces new writers to the broader Edmonton community, helping them make new contacts in the industry, and thrive in their writing careers. We asked two of the participants, mentee K’alii Luuyaltkw and mentor Naomi McIlwraith, to reflect on the experience for the EAC blog. (You can read mentor Naomi McIlwraith’s guest blog article here).

My experience as a mentee in the Horizons Writers Circle (HWC) program caused me to reflect upon my day-to-day capacity, communication habits, and overall approach toward my writing practice. I learned that I’m a very independent person. I like to be busy, but I can easily get overwhelmed. I successfully completed my goal to write a short story (my first one!), but I wasn’t always communicative with my mentor and my approach to writing was difficult to schedule. My advice to folks would be to communicate regardless of what’s going on, as professional accountability is vitally important. The program itself without a doubt pushed me forward with my goals and helped me to grow in unexpected ways. For that, I am grateful.

Moving forward, I plan to seek out funding opportunities, so I can work on my anthology of short stories. I have five or six stories written in addition to the one I worked on while participating in HWC. If I were to categorize my stories, I would describe them as modern legends with an allegorical underpinning. They’re inspired by my culture and my journey as an Indigenous person experiencing moments of self-discovery and finding lessons within unforeseen circumstances. There’s a good mix of the mundane and the otherworldly. I frequently include a combination of cultural teachings and personal knowledge that has been meaningful in my life. Often these lessons are communicated through symbolism in the form of spirits and animals, as well as tongue-in-cheek humour.

My advice for other emerging writers is to simply get your story out and worry about editing later. The biggest obstacle I’ve faced as a writer is my perfectionism and fixation on finding the exact phrasing. It’s a thing that always slows me down. It makes me feel down if I can’t get it “right”. It even prevents me from starting to write in the first place; it’s really such a monumental burden we give ourselves when we expect perfection. I’ve learned to just get the story out by setting a goal to write 500 words a day, or whatever seems reasonable for you.

Oral tradition has always been a significant part of my process. My primary expression of storytelling over the past few years has been spoken word poetry. I enjoy experimenting with tone, inflection, pauses, etc., as devices to bring the listener into the narrative. Now that I’ve moved on to short stories, I find my process still retains the oral tradition aspect, I often tell my stories out loud to family and friends before writing them down. The feedback I receive often motivates me to further manifest the stories in the written format, whereby they can be polished, refined, and shared with a wider audience. I’m often told that words are like medicine for the right listener, so it's important to share our narratives because we never know what blessings they might bring to you as an author, as well as to the people around you. I believe these things, and that we all have stories to share. That’s why I encourage anyone who’s interested in writing to just start with a concrete and manageable goal to get their story out.

K’alii Luuyaltkw is a storyteller and a truth seeker from the Nisga’a Nation. Her family is from the house of Ni’isjoohl (the spirit people) who were originally known for their many gifted halayt or medicine people. In accordance with this ancestral lineage, K’alii uses their poetry and short stories as a form of medicine both to create healing for herself, as well as to conscientiously influence the web of interconnectedness that unites all of life. Her goal for the Horizons Writers Circle mentorship is to continue to develop her poetry and short stories in preparation for publication as an anthology.

#horizonswriterscircle #yegarts #yegwrites #indigenousart #indigenous art #yeg

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