#running around my little rat cage
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populousgraph ¡ 1 day ago
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HEY CHATTT!!!
I have this year old video of me and @lo0cifer voicing over Lego Monkey Kid episode 9.
It is 4 minutes long, so grab your Alfredo noodles and enjoy!
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aunt-bridget ¡ 9 months ago
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Gender Gap. Part 2
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I laid the latex maid outfits out for my new toy to look at. I had taken the liberty to include contrasting cages too. He gurgled a protest around the ball gag and I slapped him hard across the face. He whimpered a little bit and I grabbed his shrunken balls roughly….
“Now, you little streak of rat’s piss. This is what will be happening. I’m going to give you a choice. It will be the only one you’ll get while you’re in my company. Pick a dress and a cage. We’re going to film a little video and it will be uploaded to every account you have…..LinkedIn, Facebook, tinder…..Grindr. I say that, because you might get a lot of new followers who like sissy cunts.”
He cried in pain as I then spitefully twisted his nipples. When he stopped snivelling he grunted and nodded his head toward the black dress. It was predictable, but at least the cage would be nice and pink for my little whore. In truth, he would be wearing both at various points, but we had to start somewhere. I locked the cage on his disgusting cock and tugged it once in place. Another gagged yelp escaped his mouth and another slap followed.
I stood him up and forced the dress on his body. The glossy latex clung to him, with the skirt flitting out nicely at the bottom. I spun him around and inserted a matching pink anal plug up his ass. His eyes widened as the toy invaded his rectum and he slumped in resignation. I was disappointed, I was expecting this ‘alpha’ prick to put up a fight…..but he was cowed and humiliated already.
I produced the black stockings and put them on his legs….one of them was laddered….enhancing his look of a used slut. The high heels were too small, but I wedged his trotters in them and dragged him to his feet. He tottered unsteadily, more groans of pain emanating from his drooling lips.
“There. We’re almost done. But you look far too ugly and I want a pretty maid, don’t I? So, I think we need to see if I can perform a miracle and turn you into something even I might want to fuck.”
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I grabbed the make up bag and started to apply the rouge and the lipstick. His lips were perfectly wrapped around the ball gag, making it easier to paint him into a tart. Next, the garish blue eye shadow, mascara and false lashes.
I stood back and checked my work so far. “My goodness, you really are a wanton sissy aren’t you? If I check your cage I wonder if you like it so far.”
Of course he had a mirror in his office and I shunted him over to look. He struggled and tried to curse at me….so I stuck my hand up his ass and started to manoeuvre the plug around. He shrieked like a bitch and guess what? The dreary little cock was straining in its prison. I chuckled and brought him back to the chair to continue his makeover. The auburn wig wasn’t quite his colour, but he looked presentable from behind at least. The setting up of the camera took time, but at last we were ready as I got him on all fours….crawling around his office and shaking his plugged ass for me. I lifted the skirt and the base of the squat plug was firmly on show, along with the cock cage dangling uselessly in front.
The leather slave collar was buckled on and I led him around the office a few times. When I bent him over his desk, i made sure his cuffs were tight. He saw me take the strapon and step into it….i did it slowly and deliberately just to give him time to beg….but it wasn’t going to change my mind.
The camera was set and so was I……the plug would be removed and there would be no doubt, the little slag’s mascara would be running down his face….
TBC
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gorefreaklintjrwi ¡ 3 months ago
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Ah, rats!
Lint and Troy find three rats that were dumped by an old owner. Troy insists that he doesn't want to keep them, but he cannot resist the love of the rats.
fuck it post 670 word lintroller fic at 3am. there is probably grammar/spelling mistakes but im too tired to care right now. will probably post this to ao3 some other time
“Lint, broski, we can’t keep those things. Those are freakin’ rats!”
“But they’ll freeze out there, it’s too cold! We can send ‘em back to a pet store later, man.”
Troy doesn’t have time to protest before Lint is already out the door and rushing to a pet store to get supplies. He takes a seat next to the small cardboard box, because what else is there to do? And suddenly a small gray head pops out of it, making him jump. Black, beady eyes staring back at him. It’s kind of freaking him out.
Lint mentioned there being multiple of them in there, so Troy takes a peek in the box to see what they all look like. And there sit three little rats. A  gray one with a white snout, which he’d already seen, an albino one, and a dark brown one with white feet. They’re all huddled together in a corner trying to keep warm, and the white one looks scared.
Troy blinks, and before he can even do anything, he feels the claws of a rat running up his arm and onto his shoulders. And it feels so cold. So cold. He feels bad for these small animals, they’ve been out there for who knows how long, just trying to keep warm. How could someone do this? They seem so sweet, why would someone want to give that up? He feels the rat sniffing his ear. He sees in the corner of his eye that it’s that little brown rat. Troy sees a bit of himself when he looks at that rat, when he felt it running up his arm so quickly, it’s like when he’s steamsledding. And hey, that gray one there sort of reminds him of a steamsled! And that tiny little albino rat, it’s white like a cloud. Like cloudspire. And Troy thinks those are great names. Troy Jr., Steamsled, and Cloudspire. They could just call him Cloud for short. But it’s not like they’re gonna keep these rats, anyway.
Some time later, Lint comes home with a small cage, it’ll be temporary, and some rat food. When they walk through the door, he’s shocked to see that Troy, who said that he couldn’t care less about these rats, was covered in them. The brown rat on his right shoulder, the gray one on his left, and the albino one hesitantly crawling onto his hand.
“I thought you hated rats, man!” Lint called out from the doorway.
“I do, broski, but Troy Jr. here climbed up on my shoulder super quickly and the other two followed him out! And I couldn’t just put ‘em back, man, they’re cold and I’m freaking, like, warmer than them, or something. So they wanted to keep warm!” Troy defended himself, although it’s very clear that at the very least, he doesn’t hate these rats.
Lint stifles a laugh. They don't think they’ll be getting rid of these three any time soon, considering Troy’s already named them.
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And he was right! A few days later they were returning the small cage to the pet store and replacing it with a larger one fit for three wonderful rats. They got more supplies, more toys for the rats, and soon they’d both forgotten about the fact that they were going to give these rats up. Every morning and night, Troy just watches the rats eat their food. He likes the sound they make. He likes to watch the way they act around each other. He likes seeing Troy Jr. lay on top of Steamsled, he likes watching those two fight while Cloud sneaks up and steals whatever they’re fighting over. Even if he hates most rats, these ones surely have a place in his heart.
It’s always just been Troy and Lint, but now it’s not just them. It’s Troy and Lint, and Troy Jr., Steamsled, and Cloud. Neither of them even know if rodents are allowed in the apartment, but neither of them care either. It’s all worth it.
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luna-misera ¡ 1 year ago
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You and Copia snuggling in his bed and having a little spicy making out session and things start to escalate… only to have his rats interrupt and cock block him lmao
I like the way you think, naughty ghoul~ I very much enjoyed fulfilling this request of yours. Please enjoy!
Them Rats (Copia x GN!Reader)
Warning(s): NSFW (18+ MDNI)
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It was late into the evening by the time you and Copia were settling into bed. Copia had just gotten out of the shower and smelled strongly of rich mahogany and a hint of lavender. The soap he used always stirred your senses; you wasted no time stuffing your face into his chest the second he crawled into the bed beside you.
Copia chuckled when you hummed in delight and breathed in his scent. A warm hand slid from your shoulder to the small of your back as he shifted his weight to get more comfortable beside you. It started with an innocent kiss on your forehead. However, Copia is a man with not so innocent desires, and when you look at him with those pleading eyes he simply cannot help himself.
Next thing you know he is on top of you. His hand lingers on your hip as he crashes his lips against yours. You comb your fingers through his hair as his tongue begs for admission to taste you. As he deepens the kiss you feel him teasingly roll his hips into you. The growing bulge in his pants brushes lightly against your own arousal and elicits a quiet moan from your throat. He groans against your lips in reply, and repeats the gesture again. This time his movements are deliberate as he rolls his hips into you with the intention of pleasing both himself and you.
The sensation of your clothed sexes grinding together fogs your senses as you both fall further into a cloud of ecstasy.
His lips move to your neck and your body shudders in pleasure. You feel your heart racing and your breathing gets deeper as you feel his hand slide up your back. There is a faint sound in the background. At first it is not noticeable enough to pull either of you from your fit of passion.
Then it happens again, and you pull away from Copia, "What is that...?" you ask while gasping for air.
"That is how much I want you, amore~" Copia replies seductively and presses his hips against you with a devilish smirk on his face.
You frown and turn your head away when he leans down to kiss you again. "No- Shut up." you tell him and press your finger to his lips. He makes a noise to express his disappointment but you cut him off with a harsh "SHH!"
Copia's eyes narrow in confusion as silence falls between you. He opens his mouth to speak but he is interrupted by a jarring racket that takes you both by surprise. Your heads simultaneously turn to the large rat cage that sits in the corner of the room. One of the rats seemed to think it was a great time to run on the noisy exercise wheel in their enclosure. The entire cage rattled as it spun around, and it also made a horrendous whirring sound as the plastic scraped against itself.
"Ehi! Dannati roditori!" Copia waves his fist at the rat's cage, "Ah, piccoli bastardi." he grumbles and pulls himself off you and approaches the enclosure. You watch as he opens the door to the cage and picks up the little nuisance with the utmost care and tenderness he can muster. He holds the rat in his palm and lifts it up to his face, "Tuo papà è occupato, I will give this back later, okay?" he tells the rat as he takes the wheel out of the enclosure before setting it down on the floor.
"Aaww..." he coos at the rat as it wiggles its whiskers at him. Copia then gives the rodent a gentle pet before placing it back in the cage. He turns back to you and raises his arms, "Now! Where were we, amore?" he asks and crawls back into the bed with you.
You giggle softly at him as he hovers over your body, "I was about to take my clothes off." you explain.
Copia smirks at you, "Ohoho? Is that so? Well... Let us pick up where we left off then, hm?"
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whatever-fanfics ¡ 11 months ago
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Imagine the princes as uncles
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Ikemen prince
Suitors: Rio Ortiz, Silvio Ricci, Yves Kloss, Licht Klein, Nokto Klein
Tw: contains children, bullying, harassment, verbal harassment,
~~~~~
Imagine Rio and MC's little boy running from other kids in the palace as they see their uncle King Silvio. Silvio talking with other ministers has his back to the scene, being so engrossed in what the ministers are saying he doesn't notice his little nephew until he crashes right into his legs, almost losing his balance. His annoyed face softens ever so slightly, only visible to himself as he sees his nephews crying face, blonde hair slightly covering his reddened eyes, sniffling as he hugs the little stuffed bunny, made for him by his grandmother. A quiet "oi" fell from his lips as the young boy rubbed his face into the crease of his knee. Sighing in fake exasperation he lifted the young boy into his arms, quietly griping as he took out his handkerchief to wipe the boys sniffling nose. Resting him on his hip his eyes took notice of the three young boys, as he raised an eyebrow they flinched and cowered back. Immediately understanding the situation he spoke lowly "what?" Not at all surprised as the boys turned and ran scared by the man in front of them. The ministers could only watch in silence as their king turned back around, seemingly unbothered by his nephew hiding himself in the kings shirt. "You were saying" Silvio continued.
~~~
Or, Licht looking at the door of the kitchen, the light of the hallway cut off by the small shadow by the door. Sighing as his young niece made her way from the door to him, in her tiny nightgown. Not sparing her uncle one glance as she made her way straight to the cupcakes on the counter. Specially made by her father and mother earlier that day, try as she might she couldn't reach the cupcakes. Looking at her uncle for the first time that night she pouted at him and reached her hands up, with a sigh he put the rest of his cupcake in his mouth and lifted the young girl. "You shouldn't be up so late" he gently chided, as he set her down on the counter. She surprised him as she didn't let go immediately, he hugged her back and waited for her to let go. After she did Licht took notice of her barren feet, sighing he put his fur over her. Together the two sat in silence eating their cupcakes until each had their fill. Afterwards, Licht quietly carried his niece back to her room as she dozed off on his shoulder.
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Or maybe, during a ball Nokto sighs as he downs the rest of his liquor and leads the noble woman out of the ballroom. Her giggles falling on deaf ears as he comes to a stop, her giggling ceased as she laid eyes on the scene in front of them. "Should we alert a guard?" She whispered, as she looked the young princess of age 14, trying to mold herself into the wall behind her as a young, most likely, inebriated nobleman pressured her. "Get my twin" she didn't like the way his voice lowered an octave. Nonetheless, she scurried off back to the ballroom in order to fetch the princess' father. Nokto wasted not a single second before walking towards the pair. Nokto's eyes darkened as he heard the young nobleman speak as he walked closer, though the pair had yet to notice him. "Just say yes while I'm being nice" the young nobleman paused and put his arm on the wall next to her head, half caging her in. "Honestly, I'm the best yer gonna get in yer situation. I mean come! on!" he learned in a little close to her. "You're not even a fully blooded noble, your mom is a Commoner and yer a twin to boot" he snickered before feeling a pressure on his shoulder. Not before feeling his weight shift, stabilizing himself as he looked at who had shoved him. Retort dying in his throat as he came face to face with the seventh prince. His legs gave out beneath him as he wondered if this was what a rat felt like when faced with a fox. Nokto's anger only quelled as he felt his niece squeeze his midsection, small sniffles escaping her. Nokto breathed through his nose, calming himself down, losing his temper now would only scare her further. They didn't have to stay silent for long as they heard multiple footsteps hastily heading their way. Nokto didn't have to turn around to know they belonged to his twin and his family. Nokto didn't realize it but he was holding onto her just as tight, only letting go as she wriggled herself out and threw herself into the arms of her mother. The young nobleman was ready to sprout tears as he stared up at Nokto, Licht, along with the young princess' older twin brother. Luckily you had been able to diffuse the situation enough for the guards to escort the young nobleman put of the palace. As Nokto was about to take his leave he felt someone tug his coat from behind, turning around he was surprised to see his young niece's reddened eyes and sniffling nose. Before he could ask she hugged him tightly once more, staying like that for what seemed for hours. The rest of the family looked on in silence as Nokto comforted his niece.
~~~~~
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ramblingoak ¡ 6 months ago
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To Borrow A Rat
Mushy May in Lucifer's Hollow: Day 5 - Animals
Terzo x Omega
This fic is set in an alternate universe in a town called Lucifer's Hollow. For Mushy May I'll be using the prompts to post little snippets of life for the humans and ghouls that live there 💙 Thank you to @forlorn-crows for putting Mushy May together!
~ Terzo is the mayor of Lucifer's Hollow and Omega recently moved there to open a vet clinic, Paws and Claws ~
Warnings: cuteness (i hope) and fluff, sfw, 1,700 words (thank you to @ghuleh-recs for the dividers!)
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“I need to borrow one of your rats.”
Terzo ignored the bewildered look Copia gave him and went right for the cage against the office wall.  Three pairs of eyes peered at him curiously, unsure of what to make of the person now attempting to open their cage.  
“Get your hands off of that, idiota!” 
“Ai!  Just for a little while!”  When Copia swatted at the back of his head Terzo spun around with a hiss,  “I will bring it right back.”
“You’re not borrowing a rat.”  Copia managed to get between his brother and the cage.  Two sets of mismatched eyes glared at each other until eventually Terzo flounced away, going over to the couch along the opposite wall and flinging himself onto it.  “Terzo, why do you want to borrow a rat?”
“Well, you see,”  Terzo sat there opening and closing his mouth while he seemed to debate on what to say to his brother.  “Ok.  The thing is…”
“Just spit it out, I am busy!”
“I met someone.”
“Oh Lucifer’s balls here we go.”
“Hey!  You asked and I am telling!”
“I should’ve guessed.”  Copia walked back over to his desk and sat down, grabbing the book he had been reading before Terzo barged in.  “You cannot borrow one of my rats.  Especially for whatever the fuck you were planning.”
“Aren’t you curious?”
“No, no I am the opposite of curious.  Please stop talking.”
“His name is Omega.”
“The veterinarian?”  Terzo nodded enthusiastically but when he started to speak again Copia waved him off.  “No.  That’s a horrible plan.”
“You haven’t even let me tell you the plan!”
���You want to borrow one of my perfectly healthy rats, pretend it’s sick and then take it to the vet to waste Omega’s time all under the pretense of trying to get a date with him.”
“What the fuck.”
“Please leave poor Omega alone, you’re gonna run him out of town before he’s even settled in.”
“Fratellino.”  Terzo got up from the couch, wandering over to Copia with his hands clasped together.  “Copia, per favore.  I uh, I like him.”
“Then talk to him like a normal person.”
“Where?  How?  I never run into him even in this tiny fucking town.”
“Then how do you know that you like him?”
“I have a feel—“  When Copia groaned, Terzo reached forward and grabbed the book out of his hands, smacking him over the head with it.  “Fucking listen you stronzino!  I have a feeling, ok?  I met him at the ribbon cutting for his clinic and there was something there.  I swear to you.”
“Ok!  Ok, I get it.”  Copia lowered his head into his hands, rubbing at his face violently before looking back up at Terzo.  “Why can’t you just go there and talk to him?” 
“I can’t do that.”
“Terzo, you are the mayor.  This is your town, sì?  You could do anything.”
“SÌ, like borrowing a rat because my plan is better.”
“No.”
“You have three rats you can loan me one for a few fucking hours!”
“Get out before I have Aether drag you out.”
“He wouldn’t.”
“Alright, fine.  But I’ll call Secondo and he will.”  
Another stare off began but as soon as Copia reached for his cell phone Terzo growled and stalked towards the door.  A vicious string of Italian trailed behind his brother until Copia heard the front door slam shut.    
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Omega checked his clipboard quickly before quickly heading into the exam room.
“Alright I hear we have a rat not feeling the be–oh.  Hello.”
“Ciao.”  The mayor of Lucifer’s Hollow fidgeted in place before gesturing towards the white rat sitting on the table.  “This is my rat and he is ah.  Sick.”
“I didn’t know you had rats too.”
“Oh sì, me and Copia.”  Terzo reached out as if to pet the animal but then quickly pulled his hand away.  “We are rat…fans.”
“They’re a good choice, they make amazing pets.”  
Omega smiled at the man while he moved closer.  He had not expected to see him again, not since the somewhat disastrous ribbon cutting for the opening of his clinic, Paws and Claws.  Disastrous since Omega could not stop himself from staring at Terzo openly.  There had even been a horrific moment when he couldn’t help himself and had leaned in close to smell him.  Honestly the whole event was embarrassing and he had done nothing but kick himself since.
“He is an amazing little uh, thing.”
“What’s his name?”  
Omega glanced up from the information sheet after noticing Terzo had left that part blank.  The man stared at him blankly for a handful of seconds, seemingly at a loss for words.  Terzo looked down at the rat which was busy cleaning itself, its little hands rubbing across its head. 
“Il suo nome?”  Omega nodded when Terzo looked back to him, mismatched eyes meeting his purple ones.  “Bello.”
“Bello?  I like that, is it Italian?”  Terzo pressed his lips together, nodding his head quickly.  “Well it’s nice.  He looks just like Copia’s rat, Brizio.  Are they from the same litter?”
He only got a few nods in return and man, this was awkward as hell.  Omega suppressed a sigh as he moved closer to the exam table, his hands reaching out towards the small animal.  It was pretty clear Terzo had zero interest in him, the man could barely look him in the eyes.  All the silly fantasies Omega had created since meeting him dissipated and he was left with the almost overwhelming feeling that had made him leave his previous home and move here in the first place.
The overwhelming feeling of being alone.
Omega cleared his throat as he let Bello sniff at his hands.  He felt a little nibble on one of his claws and he couldn’t help but laugh, this one was definitely related to Brizio.  Copia’s rat had done the same thing.  
“You are very good with animals.”
Terzo’s voice startled him, the accented voice sounding much warmer than it had a moment ago.  He looked up to see Terzo staring at him, something unreadable on his face.
“It helps being a quintessence ghoul, probably cheating even.  Since I can help keep them calm.”  Omega picked up Bello when the rat climbed onto his hand, bringing him a bit closer to look him over.  “You said he was sneezing?”
“Who?”  Terzo blinked a few times before shaking his head,  “Oh Bello, sì.  Lots of sneezing.”
A phone ringing cut through the air and Terzo cursed under his breath before shoving his hand in his jacket pocket.  He took a quick glance at the screen before declining the call and putting it away.
“Is it possible he got something in his nose?  His breathing sounds fine.”  
The phone rang again and while he held his stethoscope to Bello’s side Terzo turned away to answer the call.  Omega tried not to eavesdrop but it was clear whoever was on the other end was angry although he couldn’t make out what they were saying.
“I am busy!”  Terzo ended the call while he turned around, wincing when he saw Omega staring at him.  “Mi dispiace.”
“It’s ok, I can’t even imagine how busy you probably are.”
“Not busy enough to come see you.”  Omega nearly dropped the rat at Terzo’s words.  He felt his cheeks pink up, a look that Terzo started to mirror before he held his hands up.  “With my rat!  See you with my rat.  Since you are the rat…doctor.”
Damn.
“Yeah that’s me.  The rat doctor.”  He knew he was doing a terrible job hiding his disappointment but he couldn’t help it.  With a sigh he set Bello down and took a few steps back from the table to lean against the door.  “He’s perfectly healthy so no need to worry.”
“Oh well, bene!  Good.”  Terzo reached out for the rat, hesitating briefly before awkwardly picking it up.  “I suppose that’s it then.”
“Yep.  But if you hear anything else feel free to ca–shit!”
The door opened up behind him causing Omega to stumble back into the hallway.  He ended up falling against whoever had opened it and the two barely stayed upright.  Omega could feel the irritation coming off of whoever it was in waves and when he finally straightened up he found himself staring into a different set of odd colored eyes.
“Terzo!  Sei uno stupido stronzo, where is he?!”
Omega watched as the two men both let loose a string of Italian at each other, vicious sounding words that had him flinching.  He felt like an intruder, although this was his damn clinic, but he couldn’t bring himself to leave.  It wasn’t until a gentle hand on his shoulder startled him that he managed to look away.
“Sorry about this.”  Aether wandered by and went into the room to collect the rat before coming back out to stand with Omega.  “Copia insisted on coming to get Brizio.”
“Brizio?”  Omega looked down at the rat in confusion before looking into the room at the arguing brothers.  “I thought this was Bello.”
His friend let out a bark of laughter, shaking his head as he looked back into the room as well.
“Copia does tell him he’s handsome a lot but no.  This is Brizio.”
Unholy hell this was confusing.  Omega kept glancing between the rat and Terzo, trying to put everything together.  The brothers were still only using Italian but when Omega finally caught Terzo’s eyes the man’s face flushed before he looked back at Copia.  Wait…
“Bello means handsome?”  
Aether nodded, a knowing smirk on his face.  Omega found himself unable to bite back a smile, even after digging his fangs into his bottom lip.  He checked the time on his watch before scribbling his number on a corner of the exam form and tearing it off to hand to Aether.
“What’s this?”
Omega ignored Aether for a moment, looking back at Terzo with a grin.  He winked at the man, pleased beyond belief when Terzo’s mouth fell open in surprise.  After a few seconds of eye contact Omega turned back to Aether, slapping his friend on the shoulder before going to another exam room and his next appointment.
“Tell Terzo I do house calls.”
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octopiys ¡ 5 months ago
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Cw: blood/murder, body horror, mentions of catholic guilt
Witch!Johnny who has no idea of what he's doing.
His nights since "Simon" has returned have been restless, dreamless, and he's always woken up feeling.... unfinished. There was was always unease in his chest, buried deep, like the feeling of forgetting something. His days don't go by much easier.
His work is mostly on the computer, and there are sometimes where he must go into the offices, bring Gary some leftovers from the night before, fill out some files, and head on home.
Today, though, is different. He spends his time searching through every record their office had, trying to find any semblance of what he's seen.
Witch!Johnny, who's beginning to think the lack of sleep has made him go insane. Maybe he's making it up. He feels more comfortable gaslighting himself into believing that a storm pushed over the tree in his backyard, than-
NCO!Gary who finds Johnny asleep at his usually empty desk. There were numerous tabs pulled up on his computer, of age old chat forums and supernatural sightings from years ago, blogs that had gone cold. He smirks, shaking his head with the roll of his eyes as he pats Johnny on the back, trying to wake him up.
NCO!Johnny who wakes with a jolt. Gary looks slightly concerned, he must've fallen asleep again. He apologizes, and shuts down his computer. He's just felt so tired recently.
Witch!Johnny, who comes home to Ms. Riley, pacing anxiously on his front step, who's eyes light up when she sees him. She looks tired too.
"Oh, John, thank goodness- Mozzie's run away, and Tommy's coming in tonight, I was gonna ask if you can keep an eye out for him!" She pleads and he agrees, equally worried for Mozzie, short for Mozart, which is short for Mozzarella, who's been the Riley dog as long as he can remember. How the little rat dog escaped bequeaths him, but he promises to double check his wildlife traps tomorrow when he takes the cart around to collect them.
NCO!Johnny who ensured that his traps were practically harmless to the environment, not a doubt in the world that Mozzie had gotten into one of his raccoon cages.
Witch!Johnny who locks his doors twice tonight.
Fae!Simon, who thinks it's rather hot. The weather, that is.
It's a peculiar thought to have when some humans flesh and blood lies mangled beneath him. There was a soft inkling of recognition in the base of his skull, a little tendril that beckoned him to destroy it, and so he did. The heated metal bits that were fired at him had little effect. They could not hurt him now.
They could not hurt him anymore.
What used to be the wriggling mass under him had called him something odd, whispered it like a True Name, and it was. It hit a notch in the tendrils of his heart, and he sprung. This man had wronged him before, and used his true name to do so. Yet, when he said it, it didn't entirely feel like his.
Like something else shared it.
So it must've not been his after all.
He turns, the earth warm beneath his feet as the sun rose high in the sky.
What is a Simon, anyhow?
Witch!Johnny, who dreams tonight. He's a kid again, pouring over his nan's old books while she bakes too salty cookies in the kitchen. He never complained, and she gave him a handful of chocolate chips to munch on while the cookies were in the oven. Simon would be coming over later, and he too, would not complain about the cookies. Johnny would give him a chocolate chip for his bravery.
His Nan bumbles up to him, her chest puffing proudly that the boy is following in her footsteps. "Did ah ev'r tell ya 'boot my lil' Jackie?"
"Yes, Nan," He'd always say in response.
"Aye, but y' dinnae ever listen!" Something sharp lurks beneath her words, like sharp rocks that you take notice of when you finally take the training wheels off of your bike. "When ah was a wee lass, my lil broder, Jackie, was too curious for his own good. Born with caul, too, if ye can believe. Mam would call us in fer dinner, and she'd send me ou' ta find him. He loved the woods, that boy, and the life inside o' it. Real sweet lil' thing, too. Broke his heart anytime Mam squished a bug, and God forbid he stepped on one o' em on his own! I found him, one night, sittin' just inside o' the trees. There were mushrooms all 'round him, like somethin' had died just up under th' roots. An' ah knew then, I think. But ah ran inside and got me Mam, cus he would nae answer when ah called 'im. She came out with th' shears-" She pokes him in the side with a wooden spoon for extra measure, and he giggles, despite the tragedy of the story. "An' cuts up all o' the mushrooms, an' he sits up, and walks back inside."
"What then, nan?" He asks, always too eager for his own good.
"Thought ye said ye heard o' this one?" She teases him, before turning away and continuing. "He was so quiet after tha'. Made me sad, cus he would nae talk aboot anythin'. Like a switch had been triggered. He stepped on a bug he found that night. And another one, after that. His eyes were so cold." She trailed off, sounding almost sad, which seemed impossible to Johnny, because his Nan was never upset. "Me Mam turned him out the next week. Told him that she wanted her boy back. She warded the creature off with those shears up there, an I never saw 'im again." She hums, like this was an everyday occurrence as she gestures to the old sheers hanging in the window.
Witch!Johnny asks, no longer a child. "What was it, Nan?"
His Nan just smiles, before looking down at the book. "Seems like ye found one o' yer own, have ye nae?"
Witch!Johnny who looks down at the old book, where written in ancient ink across the top was the header: Changeling.
Witch!Johnny, who sits up in a cold sweat. His clock read 3:13. Unlucky. Somewhere in his former catholic brain, an alarm bell rang.
The curses of the law lifted by becoming the curse.
Did he still have that book?
He'd found one of his own. He spills out of his bed, racing to his bookshelf.
He blows dust off the cover and flips through it until he's satisfied, eyes settling on the thinning paper. Changelings. Was he right?
Deep-seated unease settles inside of him as he read, mentally ticking off boxes.
For it is written.
Pointed teeth. Cold eyes. Personality change. Precious, precious, precious. Did he play any instruments? No. Not Simon. He barely talked anymore. Barely ate, that he knew of.
Changeling, changeling, changeling.
The man that lives down the street, who came back rugged from war. The man who was not the person he grew up with. The Simon who came back. He should've known. Oh, his grandma must be turning in her grave right now, or laughing at his stupidity. He drops the book, hands shaking.
The Ghost that replaced Simon Riley was a Changeling.
Cursed is everyone who hangs in the trees.
Last part | Next part
Inspired by Meet Me In The Woods by Lord Huron
Taglist: @whorangi1104 @impossible-to-pronounce @the-only-universe-here
(If your blog is here but the tag doesn't work, there's a good chance your blog is accidentally hidden! Lmk if that's the case :) )
Any questions? My ask box is open!! <3
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there-are-no-angels ¡ 7 months ago
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in honor of the trent post, here are some other total drama characters i think would age regress + some images i think fit the situation
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recovered zeke au that still regresses into that feral state? shit, i think i’m kinda cooking here. probably sucks his thumb and has a rat plush he really likes. he hates tight spaces because they remind him of the tight spaces in the plane and the cage chris put him in, but he does like being under the covers.
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EXPLOSIVO ONLY LOVES TWO THINGS. NAPS AND STUFFIES!!! in all seriousness, this is a bit of self projection, because my identity is also really unstable and weird. do not let her cute wide eyes and star shaped pacifier fool you, she is a feral little toddler who will bite you and play pretend by hitting you with a stick she taped to a knife.
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surprise! :3 bet this one was unexpected. back on topic, i feel like he would hate himself for it. he never bothered to figure out why it happened or what it meant, just taking it at face value and thinking it was just another thing that made him worse. until [character of your choice] found him regressed, and he made a total fucking fool of himself trying to explain it to them. now [whoever you said before] takes care of him.
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do i even like… have to explain this one? or is it just true? i’d like to think mal also regresses, and everyone else scrambles to stop them from doing anything stupid. but that never matters, because either way, mike ends up crying, and mal ends up being dragged off to the time out corner by vito. a fate worse than death, really.
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i cannot explain this one. i just feel like he becomes a pathetic little creature sometimes. he probably eats even more dirt. i’d like to think he runs around outside and gets himself dirty climbing trees and digs in the ground like a dog. [whoever you want] can give him a bath after.
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this can work for a recovered au, or one where she never mutated in the first place. will say she doesn’t need someone to take care of her, and then ask you to take care of her when the regression actually hits. likes taking naps and probably has a hello kitty pacifier. either speaks in broken english or prefers not to speak at all, she would rather communicate with small noises like growls.
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hogwartslegacyreactions2 ¡ 6 months ago
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Can I have a reaction to Hogwarts Legacy students and professors to a female hufflepuff MC who owns a chinchilla
They have the softest fur on the planet
Only eat hay and special pellets ( no fruit or veggies in their diet) they can have certain dried herds and flowers though
Sorry about all the chin facts I own one
My little girl is all white with dark grey ears and some grey on her face and base of her tail with the pinkest noise
Please and thank you
A/N: I've had the honor of petting one once, they are the softest creature in the world ❤️ Thank you for the reference photo ❤️❤️
HLC REACT TO F!MC HAVING A CHINCHILLA
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SEBASTIAN SALLOW: "What in Merlin's name- no, forget Merlin, what in the world is that??" He squints and looks real close at it. Gets right up in the floofy rodent's face. So close that the chinchilla sniffs his nose back. He huffs and gives a little smirk. "Adorable...just like its owner." He throws a cheeky wink at MC.
OMINIS GAUNT: He trusts MC wouldn't put anything terrible in his hand when he was asked to hold it out. He feels the light weight of a small soft creature on his palm. He brings his free hand up to lightly pet it and he smiles. "It's quite soft, MC. Is this another one of your beasts?" He doesn't give the chinchilla back for quite some time, they even take a nap together.
ANNE SALLOW: "I've never seen anything like it!" She gazes in amazement and holds out a treat MC gave her to give to it. She's very curious about the chinchilla; where it came from, how long has MC had it, etc. She hopes MC brings it with her every time she visits.
IMELDA REYES: "Is that a rat in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?" MC's chinchilla was indeed hanging out in her pocket. She tells the same joke every time MC is around in the hope she'll get to see the baby. She doesn't lose her mind over its cuteness but she wants to pet it every time it's around.
NATSAI ONAI: She sneaks extra snacks for the chinchilla all the time. She also lets it sleep in her robe if MC is busy. She loves pet sitting. She's also fascinated by the chinchillas tiny hands, they can grab things??? Like a people??? Weird.
GARRETH WEASLEY: He's never seen fur like what the chinchilla has. He's very curious if it has any unique properties. Don't worry, he would dare take a pair of scissors to such a precious creature, but when MC is cleaning its cage, will she spare a few furballs?
LEANDER PREWETT: He struggles to maintain his composer when MC is carrying around the little fluff ball all curled up in her arm. It's. Too. Cute. It's unfair how cute it is! When MC lets him hold it for the first time, he cries. He's not allergic, his eyes are sweating. Stop pointing it out.
AMIT THAKKAR: His only hang up with the chinchilla is that it chews on everything. All of his books have teeth marks on them from the chinchilla sneaking a nibble when no one was looking. Nevermind his quills, parchment, shoes, and even his wand. Is nothing sacred?? He's gained the habit of watching it like a hawk when MC brings it around.
EVERETT CLOPTON: "Hehehehe, Levioso." Whoosh the chinchilla is in the air and very confused. Any retaliation from MC is worth it. It's funny watching the little chinchilla get so confused by suddenly leaving the ground.
POPPY SWEETING: She has to cover her mouth to muffle the squee that escapes her as to not draw attention, but she is losing her mind. The chinchilla is the absolute cutest thing she has ever seen and that is saying a lot. She steals the chinchilly away every chance she gets, straight up runs off. Her chinchilla now, bish.
~~~
ELEAZAR FIG: He doesn't mind pet sitting when MC is out and about for extended periods of time. He and the chinchilla get along quite well. However, when he himself gets buried in work sometimes he loses track and has to go digging through his office to find where the chinchilla scampered off to.
MATILDA WEASLEY: "As long as you follow the pet guidelines set by the school, your unique pet is welcome. That said, this is quite the curious creature. How did you acquire this?" She studies the chinchilla and gets it a little pat.
CHIYO KOGAWA: "Cute." Is all she says about it. She's not a big pet person. Nothing personal.
AESOP SHARP: His initial reaction is just a dismissive "hmm" when MC shows it off, but later on, if the chinchilla escapes, it finds its way to the dungeons and into his classroom where it sits in his lap and he mindlessly strokes its soft fur. It's very therapeutic. Would want to pet again.
ABRAHAM RONEN: "A chinchilla! Holy guacamole those are rare in these parts. Where did you get it?" He examines the chinchilla closely and rubs its ear.
MIRABEL GARLICK: "Oh my, aren't you just the most darling thing I've seen!" She excitably comes over the chinchilla and bounces in place when she gets to pet it. "Oh! It's so impossibly soft!" She orders seeds of plants native to Western South America and grows a few just for MC's pet.
MUDIWA ONAI: "Well, this is one unique creature. I see you two have a very special bond." She delights seeing the chinchilla.
BAI HOWIN: She reminds MC to keep plenty of fine dust available for their pet to roll in. "Scotland gets a lot of precipitation and moisture isn't good for their coats. Keep them dry and healthy." She hands the little chinchilla a pellet.
DINAH HECAT: She smiles as she pets it. "I had a chinchilla when I was little. Stole it from a merchant who wasn't too good at taking care of his merchandise. Nursed him back to health. Had him for twelve long years. Good years..." She tears up a little, but makes no fuss of it.
CUTHBERT BINNS: He doesn't really notice. Thinks the chinchilla is an extra small puffskien or something.
SATYAVATI SHAH: "No thank you, I do not wish to pet your chinchilla. Please finish your star charts." Doesn't even look up from her work.
PHINEAS NIGELLUS BLACK: "Ew, take your fat squirrel and get out of my way. I have important business to attend." He walks away with his nose in the air.
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populousgraph ¡ 15 days ago
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This booping thing reminds me of this line
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And I will quote this all day-
We ride.... TO WAAAARRRR!!!!
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corrodedcoughin ¡ 2 years ago
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little story about little Eddie and his 2 new friends | word count approx 2.5k | general audience rating | steve and eddie are kids and Wayne is a pushover
Wayne sometimes thinks it was a mistake, not taking in the boy. God no, he would never think of Eddie as anything other than an important and intrinsic part of his life, couldn't be without him, wouldn't want to be. 
No, what Wayne worries about is how his readiness to help Eddie feel loved might contribute to the boy's difficulty in making friends.
It was an innocent enough request, Eddie asked for a pet as all young children do. He was so small and so wide eyed, just a scrap of an 8 year old with more feelings than he knew what to do with. Wayne knew he'd never hold up against any request Eddie made but he liked to pretend to himself that he could. And while technically he never pandered to the boy, yes Eddie usually got what he wanted but in a way that suited their means. Or so Wayne tells himself. 
8 year old Eddie asked for a pet and a pet is what he got.
-
Eddie barrelled into the trailer door, backpack swinging off his arm and ready to be thrown into the corner. Planning to shoot off back out the door to do his usual; lift up rocks and inspect whatever bugs he could find, to grab sticks and imagine them as wizard staffs, to let his imagination finally run wild after hours of sitting still at a desk under too bright lights and too busy class rooms. In truth he wasn't really paying attention to the insides of the trailer, expecting it to be the same as always. It took a very pointed cough for Eddie to register that Wayne was unusually home from work, far earlier than normal, and a further loud clearing of the throat for Eddie to pay attention to what Wayne had placed on the kitchen table. 
Right in the middle of the table, sitting in a beam of sunlight, was a cage and in that cage was what would soon become, Eddie's very reason for being. He crept up close, almost as if scared that any sudden movements would prove the whole thing to be a cruel illusion. He was brought out of his reverie by a pink nose wiggling at the bars, whiskers attached and twitching as the rest of the rat appeared.
'is he-? is he for real?' Eddie said with a gasp, hands inching towards the door of the cage. 
Wayne had to suppress a laugh, trust this boy to be bowled over in wonder at a rat as if it were a puppy. He opened the contraption of the enclosure door and dipped his hand inside, allowing the rat to climb onto his palm. The guy from work assured him that this one was the most tame he had, inquisitive to a fault and oddly enough, desperate to be handled. Quite honestly, the perfect match for his well meaning but excitable nephew-near-enough-son. 
'Yeah, yeah kid it's for real. And he's a she.' Wayne lets the rat sniff at Eddie's hands, little pink hands finding a platform on Eddie's palms, clearly holding himself a still as possible but if Wayne knew this boy, and he did, he knows that Eddie is so close to vibrating out of his skin, that containing that much excitement must be killing him. 
'I don't care. Wayne, I don't! Can she sleep in my room? Does she know tricks? Can I teach her? What does she like? Can I take her to school? Please! Wayne!' He's started now, words pouring out of his mouth, tripping over himself to try and release every thought entering his brain at lightning speed.
'Woah, there' Wayne says pulling the rat up, cradling it in two hands, 'We got to be kind to her alright? She's only small. Doesn't know what loud noises are good and which are bad, okay?' He watches as Eddie nods vigorously, eyes never leaving the creature. 'Now you promised me you'd look after a pet so that's what's going to happen. She is your responsibility. That means cleaning, feeding and loving, got it?' Eddie nods again, tentatively reaching his hands up, the image of Oliver Twist springs to Wayne's mind. 
Wayne comes around the kitchen table, crouches down to Eddie on creaky knees and hands the rat over, filling Eddie's small hands with a heartbeat and fur. Eddie giggles, watching as the rat surveils the new patch of skin its found itself on. 
'Tickles, Wayne' and its said with such love and devotion Wayne almost feels his heart break 
'Yeah son. She does, doesn't she?' 
-
 Of course it takes less than a week and Eddie and Sam are inseparable. As soon as Eddie gets home he's itching for his furry friend, delighting in the way she scampers around the room, over his arms and anywhere she can get. No matter what though, she always comes back to him. She can be digging in to a particularly interesting crevice behind the couch but she'll always come running back when she hears Eddie make a noise.  
The thing is, Eddie is a pretty lonely kid. Not for lack of trying, don't get it wrong. Eddie tries to socialise he tries to talk to the other kids in his class, get them involved in his imaginary games and play pretend but being the new kid doesn't really do him any favours. Being the new kid that lives in the trailer park and a penchant for biting to show affection does him even less. 
To Eddie, its him and Sam against the world. He can come home and know that his best friend will listen to all his problems, will stay close and won't run away even when he's extra loud or being 'a lot' as his teacher like to tell him. He's so tired of being told to use his 'quiet hands', his 'inside voice' and every other subdued phrase they try to press on him. 
This particular day was a hard one, Sally Winters had said that Eddie was 'bad luck' and the word quickly spread around by recess. Eddie had thought he was making some progress with a couple of kids from the class, was thinking today might be the day that he finally got asked to play but that hope quickly got squashed. He had hopped up to the potential friends with a stick in his hand and a notion of being a pirate when they both looked at him like he was a monster, they couldn't get away fast enough. And Eddie couldn't find a place to hide quick enough before the fat and heavy tears fell from his eyes. 
It was a long day and home time was his only saving grace. 
Wayne knows somethings up, can tell in the way that Eddie isn't even really talking to Sam, hardly looking at the Tv despite the fact that Wayne very purposefully had put the cartoon Lord of the Rings movie on. The sure fire fall back he liked to keep in his back pocket. The trump card to get his kid happy. This time though? No luck. Looking at the kid makes a chasm open up in his gut, deep and full of overwhelming sadness that he just wants to stop, wants to find the solution to make this boy smile like the sun again. They don't talk much for the rest of the night but Wayne makes sure to stay close, stay awake in case he's needed. Eddie spends the time between dinner and bed sitting on the floor, side pressed up against Wayne's leg and playing fetch with bits of Wayne's whittling with Sam, not a word said. 
-
Eddie wakes up the next morning with a plan and a devil may care attitude. Oh so carefully he maintains his usual routine; says good morning to Sam, carts her around the trailer as he washes his face and wanders into the kitchen, placing her in her secondary cage so she can eat breakfast with Eddie and Wayne - Eddie was adamant that they couldn't have meals without her, 'she's part of the family!' and soft hearted fool Wayne Munson agreed and an additional cage was sourced. 
When breakfast is finished Eddie begins his usual rigmarole of dragging his feet to get out of his pjs and into his clothes, reluctant to grab his bag and go out the door. Same old protests as Wayne watches him walk out towards the school bus. 
What is a new addition to the routine though, is Sam Munson hiding up the sleeve of a school boy and about to go on a secret and very dangerous mission. A mission to survive the school day. 
Surprisingly, Eddie manages to keep Sam secret, keep her safe, the whole morning. He came prepared with snacks to make sure she was entertained and happy, he couldn't stand the thought of her being sad, her eyes get so big and her tail droops as well as her ears, it makes the whole of Eddie ache. But no, she's happy, or happy enough at least. 
So the morning goes without a hitch, Eddie making noises to cover up any squeaks and keeping a hand in his pocket to reassure Sam, stowed in the pocket of his hoodie. He knows he's seen as 'weird' so what's a few extra noises? They are let out for recess and Eddie breathes a sigh of relief, thinking this is his time to let Sam out, knowing she's desperate for some fresh air. Sure, she's peed in his hoodie pocket, but he can't really tell with it's dark colour and the layer of t-shirt between the wet material and his tummy. 
He runs off to his usual corner, stuck between a bush and a tree and gently tips Sam out of his pocket, she scampers around his feet and gratefully accepts a broken off bit of cracker between her hands.
'Thanks for coming with me Sam. Everyone is so mean, its so stupid. I don't care. You are a better friend than any of those losers' He crouches down, hoping to find a twig to play fetch with. A game that he delights in, is immeasurably proud of her for learning it so quickly. 'Gonna find you the best stick Sam. Promise. Best stick for the best friend' 
He continues muttering to himself and doesn't notice that he's getting progressively louder after finding a twig and beginning the game. Doesn't register that he's drawn unwanted attention with his happy shouts and encouragement until a body is crashing through the shrub he's hidden himself behind. 
Sam doesn't notice either until the unexpected form is right in front of her and she bolts, running as fast as her legs will carry her and Eddie is right behind her, muttering under his breath as he trips over his own feet in an attempt to catch her 'oh shit oh no oh no oh no' He's pushing himself as hard as he can but it doesn't count for much, he never was the fastest. He keeps trying though but then a faster body is accelrating past him, in a evident bee line for Sam. 
Without thinking, Eddie lets out a painful 'NO!' terrified of what might happen.
He knows people think rats are dirty, thinks they don't deserve love and don't deserve life. He doesn't want to imagine what this person's intent might be. Sam reaches a dead end up against the wall of the school and the body, the boy, stops infront of her. Scoops her up? Cradles her into his chest? Eddie...Eddie doesn't know what to think, he's prepared to fight this kid but then the boy is looking up at him with curious hazel eyes. Stroking Sam's head gently and with intent.
He holds Sam out, careful with his motions, trying to blow his brown floppy hair out of his face without disturbing the animal in his hands 'is she okay? is she yours? did I hurt her? she looks okay, is she?' Eddie gingerly steps forward and plucks Sam out of the boys hands, gives hera thorough inspection as the other boy continues 
'I didn't mean to scare her I swear! I didn't even know you had her! I won't tell, I swear I wont! You know...you shouldn't really have a rat in school. If I promise not to tell can I play with you? I'm Steve' 
Holding her close, Eddie squints at the boy, at Steve, and thinks. Thinks about how he looks nice, about how soft his hair looks and how he asked Eddie, Eddie!, to play, that he didn't give him a wide bearth and that he held Sam with such care. It isn't even a hard decision.
They spend the rest of recess together. Eddie shows Steve just how smart Sam. That she can play fetch, that she can run across one arm to the next, over your shoulders without losing balance. That she can twitch her whiskers and it seems like she's laughing at the joke Eddie tells her. That she laughs at the joke Steve tells her! Steve learns that she's named after somebody called Samwise and it doesn't matter that he's a boy because Sam is brave just like Samwise and smart and cares just as much. That Sam is Sam and Eddie is Frodo and together they can take on the world. 
Steve asks if he can have a name too and Eddie calls him Legolas, doesn't tell him why. Doesn't say that Steve reminds him of the pretty elves described in the books Wayne reads out loud to Eddie. It doesn't matter, not really. 
Recess ends and they shuffle back to the school doors, both of them lagging behind the others.
Eddie steels himself, knows he has to bring his misfortune up so that he can own in, so that his new friend doesn't find out from someone else. 'I'm bad luck you know. Sally...she said it. now everyone wont talk to me. I wont be mad if you don't either. I've got Sam. We'll be oaky! So you can just go, I don't care!' He knows he's getting wound up, he can't stop himself. He just wants the bandaid ripped off so he can start feeling sad quicker, get it over with sooner.
Before he can register is, Steve is wrapped around Eddie in a flash of a hug, careful to keep his tummy away from squashing Sam. 
'Not bad luck to me. See you tomorrow Frodo' Steve whispers next to Eddie's ear and shuffles through the school door. 
Eddie is in a daze of joy and happiness, thoughts rumbling through his head but none of them sticking as he journey back into his class room. Pure happiness radiating out of his body, he takes Sam out of his pocket and holds her up to his face 'Sam you made my bad luck go away!' kissing her on the forehead as he hears his teacher scream 
'EDWARD MUNSON IS THAT A RAT?!'
-
So Wayne thought the already unpopular kid having a rat would make things worse. Turns out, he was wrong. Very, very wrong. He might have to start pocket inspections before school though.
--------------------------------------
also on ao3 if that's the preferred reading format for you
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genshingorlsrevengeance ¡ 7 months ago
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Request: Velvet and Eleanor reacting to Magilou flirting with their younger sibling (the reader) right in front of them.
(Tales of Berseria) Velvet and Eleanor reacting to Sibling!Reader getting flirted with
To quote our lord Steve Harvey, "KILL"
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Velvet was always protective of Laphicet and (Y/N), even before she became a daemon.
And since (Y/N) was the last person Velvet had in her life, she wasn't going to let anything hurt them.
Even beyond just protecting them from harm, her big sister instincts still remained.
Which meant especially that people trying to engage romantically with (Y/N) was signing their death warrant.
And so enters: The Magilou.
(Y/N) was in the middle of preparing dinner for the night before hearing footsteps approach them.
(Y/N) "Hey, whoever that is, could you pass me the ladle? I need to do a taste test."
(Magilou) "Oh, here you go, dear (Y/N)!"
(Y/N) "...Oh no-"
Magilou hopped in front of them, dramatically extending her hands upwards to the sky, ladle in hand.
(Magilou) "Fear not, for I, the great Magilou, will help prepare a dish fit for the gods above!"
(Y/N) "Respectfully Magilou, I don't need help. Velvet taught me everything I need to know about cooking."
(Magilou) "Surely you jest! There's nothing Velvet can do that I cannot perform better!"
She leaned in close to them with a smirk.
(Magilou) "In fact, ignore your sister for a moment and listen to my advice! You may even win my heart, should you perform well enough!"
(Y/N) "I...doubt that.-"
(Magilou) "WHAT?! Am I not the prettiest woman you have ever laid eyes on?! How can you resist such alluring charms?!"
(Y/N) "Listening to you speak, for one-"
(Magilou) "Psh! It seems a foul mouth runs in the family-"
Suddenly, a young voice came from behind the two.
(Laphicet) "VELVET! MAGILOU IS PICKING ON (Y/N)!"
(Magilou) "What the-HANG ON YA LITTLE TYKE! I WAS JUST-"
Before the three of them could even blink, Velvet closed the distance from seemingly nowhere
Magilou fumbled with the ladle in genuine shock as Velvet began speaking.
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Magilou backed off in fear, hiding behind (Y/N).
(Magilou) "H-Hang on now! I was just playing around, it was a goof! It was a gag!"
(Laphicet) "That's not what I heard! You said that both Velvet and (Y/N) had a foul mouth!"
(Magilou) "And you have a loose one, ratting me out like this!"
Velvet grabbed the ladle from the floor, and hit Magilou over the head with it.
Saying nothing else, she scooted Laphicet to sit next to (Y/N) before crouching down and turning to her sibling with a softer expression.
(Y/N) "Sis, you don't have to end Magilou, it's nothing she hasn't done before. And thanks to you too, Laphicet."
Laphicet nodded with a big smile as well.
(Laphicet) "Mhm!...Oh, we need to clean the ladle now!"
(Velvet) "Yeah. Give me a sec and we'll see how you did on the soup."
Magilou rubbed her injury, muttering to herself.
(Magilou) "Freakin' sister complex-"
(Velvet) "I heard that."
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Eleanor was completely against (Y/N) joining her as she chased Velvet and her group, but the Abbey had decreed it so.
Which resulted in both of them being taken as "prisoners".
She feared for their lives, but she didn't realize that she also had to fear for their love life.
And she sure as hell would not let (Y/N) date anyone from this group of misfits.
Especially a certain one.
Well, two, actually. But Velvet didn't really seem to care about dating, thank god.
Neither did option one, but that didn't stop her from being an absolute nusiance.
(Magilou) "(Y/N)!"
(Y/N) was offput by her sudden arrival, considering that they were just in their room thinking.
(Y/N) "What the- Why did you kick open my door?!"
(Magilou) "How can our days be brightened without the young exorcist's beloved sibling? Instead of being with us, you are cooped up in your room!"
(Y/N) "E-Eleanor told me to stay here for a little bit. I'm not exactly inclined to against her wishes-"
(Magilou) "Ah, but you are shackled in here, like a bird in a cage! You must let your wings spread out and fly, little dove!"
(Y/N) "I think I'm good, thanks-"
(Magilou) "Y'know, listening to your big sister all the time will leave you maidenless for the rest of your life! She'll shield you from all the joys and wonders of the world!"
(Y/N) "I'm not doing your laundry, Magilou. And neither is Eleanor!"
(Magilou) "Fine, I'll just have to put on my dazzling magics to get you to see reason-"
(Eleanor) "YOU WILL DO NO SUCH THING!"
Eleanor stomped towards Magilou, shoving her outside the room before standing at the doorframe, arms crossed.
(Eleanor) "Do not engage my little brother/sister in your tomfoolery! I will not allow it!"
(Magilou) "See? This is exactly what I'm talking about! Eleanor will prevent any kind of love from blossoming-"
(Eleanor) "BE QUIET!"
She turned to (Y/N), getting even more flustered and angry.
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(Y/N) "I don't think any other person will be like Magilou...I-I hope."
(Magilou) "Hmph! Both of you don't know a true dazzler when you see one-"
(Eleanor) "All I see is someone trying to leech off my sibling just to get their laundry done!"
(Magilou) "Why does everyone assume that I'm just here for my stinking clothes?! Can't I be here for romance, drama, or even anything else?!"
(Y/N) and Eleanor glared at Magilou.
(Magilou) "And for your information, I was here to recruit either of you to make dinner instead of me!"
(Y/N & Eleanor) "GET OUT!"
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avocado-writing ¡ 1 year ago
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Kinktober 17
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17. Dirty Talking, Pussy Eating/Blowjob, Breath Control
You’re working an event. One you organised, actually, a gala for a smaller museum relying on public funding. You like to be able to help the community as much as you can so you donated your efforts for free and organised a showing of some rarer artefacts for them. You’re doing what you do best: gliding effortlessly between sponsors, trying to wrack up more donors for the place, a winning smile plastered on your face. You don’t get to be two thousand years old without learning how to talk to people.
Your husbands are here, too. Dressed up properly. Well, as properly as you can get them - they’re in decent suits, at least. Aziraphale is making animated conversation with one of the partygoers about a book on display, and Crowley looks bored. 
When Crowley looks bored, you know there’s going to be trouble.
You see, when the partygoer heads off, Crowley moves closer to Aziraphale. His lips are whispering something devilishly, a smile creeping across his face. The effect is immediate. Aziraphale goes bright red and has to start subtly adjusting his trousers. He says something sharply to the demon who chuckles.
Crowley snakes over to you while you’re getting yourself another glass of wine. 
“Whatever you’re up to, stop it,” you say, lowly. Crowley hums and puts his chin in his hand, regarding you coolly behind his dark glasses.
“Me? Up to something? You wound me, my love.”
He waits until the bartender is turned and dips his head forward.
“I was just thinking about how I want to fuck you in that suit.”
You inhale sharply, glancing around to make sure nobody is listening, then shoot Crowley a dangerous look.
“Crowley…”
“What? You didn’t pick it because you knew it looked bad, did you?”
It is your favourite suit, to be fair. Navy blue and tight, it accentuates all of the best parts of your body. You know your bum looks spectacular in it.
“We are in public.”
Crowley waves his hand, and at once, everyone finds something interesting to look at away from the bar. He steps forward, caging you in with his hips. You feel the rub of his cock against your arse.
“Tell me you’re not thinking about it. About me pushing you over this bar, spreading your legs. You wouldn’t put up a fight would you? You’d love me fucking you where everyone can see.”
You press your thighs together, feel your face get hot.
“Rip those trousers off you, press my mouth between your legs like you deserve. I know you love my tongue, nightingale. I bet you’d love to be eaten here, wouldn’t you? Stake your claim over this little museum. You’d never be able to come here again without thinking about how many orgasms I gave you in the function room. You’d always need to press your luscious thighs together.”
“Crowley…” A plea.
“I know how needy you are. I bet, right now, I could sink my cock inside you up to the base, couldn’t I? Feel you dripping down me. You’d make a dreadful mess on the bar but somehow I think you wouldn’t really care. I think you just want to see me soaked in you.”
“Stop…” you don’t mean it.
“Fuck, you’re like velvet. I never get tired of having you.”
He wraps a hand lightly around your neck, and instead of telling him off, you find yourself keening into it. He runs his thumb along your pulse point, flicks his tongue out to lick the shell of your ear.
“Aziraphale’s waiting for us in the cloakroom. Are you coming?”
Yes, you rather are.
When the bartender finally turns back round with your sauvignon blanc, he’s surprised to see you utterly gone.
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@bootlmoth @elleofdragons  @angelic-anarchy27 @yeethaw13 @candlewitch-cryptic @kwyn-q @rat-that-writes @buryustogether @letthenightingalessingagain @ltlthetrifecta @angiestopit @purplefrog1sblog @wereallbrokenangels @angelspathway @clarina04 @belilwen @chaospossum @eightsdoctor @oo-delallymrcrow @silcosmoke @climbingivy97 @live-logs-and-proper @project-sad @just-a-beatlemaniac69 @imagination-phantom @anonymously35 @corgis04 @peytonpenguin37 @catlynharper @unabashedgentlemenpirate @wolfe-houler
@darktealrat @mxxny-lupin @willbedecided @detectiveapparatiagreen @shadowluna25 @kaylinelizabeth4004 @xquinn-bartonx @blue-bell22 @foolishprincipalitee @fandomawesomeness @eweweweewewe @latersgaters-steven @llamaproblem @night-affiliate @randompost18 @hunterispunk @jessica-laufeysdottir @uxcaran @bunnymallowo @jae-michael @jelly-terror @larkiesparkie
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fountainpenguin ¡ 3 months ago
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Riddle watches New Wish - Post #5
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They're so cute...
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OH, she set them up!! Here we go!
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Wanda making squeaky toy noises when Cosmo hugs her is all I've ever wanted.
"We're real, all right! ... Real fairies. Not real humans."
BUDAWHAAAAAAAA-? Thank you Cosmo for just confirming elastic skin, which has been one of the most important headcanons in my worldbuilding. I did not expect you to do that for me, but... thanks?
Pfft, Wanda changing her legs.
ERG??? Is that you?
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Okay, there's that "We've been retired for 10k years" implied time travel bit; I think I remember that from the story bible + early convos with my friends, so at least I came prepared to expect that.
This is either time travel - which plays perfectly into my established "Cosmo ate a time key during dinosaur times and has been running around through time unsupervised for ages" headcanon anyway, LOL - or they're flat-out lying to Hazel, seeing as the audience already knows Timmy is confirmed as a recent godkid, so... Hm.
SLDKFJSD I love how the guy who accidentally sent his baby stroller down a steep hill is wearing a #1 Dad hat. "My expensive stroller! ... I mean, my baby!" - Yeah, we're still in FOP. All the parents are terrible here.
Setting her up as loving french fries and then turning her into a fly who found french fries was clever.
Cosmo once again being so close and yet so far to his mark. Good to see him back!
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Me when I return my would-be murderer's daughter, who is a bug.
I AM SO GLAD that even in 10,000 years, Wanda's small talk skills have not improved far beyond "I'm Human McRealPerson" and "My husband is a grilled cheese sandwich" from back in the day, sdlkfj. That's my girl!
oh no, the Venus flytrap gift they brought over is about to go so wrong.
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Yep, she's still goin'. Talking about the carwash.
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GIRL check your fingers.
OH MY GOSSSSSSH, he's dressed for a classy party in Fairy culture. Cosmorella? We thought you were dead!!
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... That's an ant? I would've guessed tick.
It's a guy ant? Buddy, are you sure you're supposed to be foraging?
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Let's go!!
SDLKFJSDKLFJSLKJF noooo... No, no, no, no, no... Not the thing I use to symbolize memorials for the dead, c'mon!
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It IS an accurate item for a Fairy house- these were all over the place in Fairy World during the old show, AND in that color, though you usually see more than one "wand" per pot.
I'm super impressed the artists studied the old interior design customs. Huh.
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Cosmo lives here. Also, BABY!!
OOH, I'm excited that Cosmo and Wanda's window overlooks Fairy World because it's kind of a portal. I did something super similar with a rat cage in an upcoming Frayed Knots scene, where Anti-Cosmo and Wanda are godparenting together during school. Nifty!
He even confirmed it's a spell on the front door! Wow. Somehow, Past Me nailed that.
"We can choose which world we go out into!" -> /Me with my 'fic where Kevin Crocker is confused that Shirley's Pizza Parlor has an exit on the other side that goes to Retroville.
Cosmo: We lived in Timmy's fishbowl for 20 years. Wanda: It was 7.
You are both wrong- it was like 68 <3 But honestly, I forgive you for not wanting to tell Hazel time was frozen for 50 years. I don't think she'd like that. Actually, I don't think she was born yet, because my vision is time freezing at the end of Season 4, and Dale was rescued in Season 2, so... Yeah, she wasn't born. Still, you don't wanna just drop that on someone.
That's actually very funny that Cosmo and Wanda are struggling because they're out of practice during their retirement.
THERE'S THE SIGN!! Way to go.
Oh, and the credits are done in a similar style to the old ones? Even the colors? That's so cute! That's also nice that Hazel's VA was a story editor too- That probably helps with the passion and vision.
That was cute. I liked it. Huge relief to see something well-researched and made with love after "Fairly Odder" was a struggle for me.
I've got a little more time tonight, I might be able to get one more episode done before bedtime.
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ordinaryschmuck ¡ 3 months ago
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Full Family AU Part 13
Camila sat Vee down on a chair she got from the kitchen, looking over this new form she took.
"Hair feels right," Camila said, giving Vee's hair a tussle. She lifted up an arm. "And skin doesn't feel scaly. Or slimy. And clothes..."
She pinched a bit of Vee's skirt.
"Feel like fabric. Although, this seems like a problem."
She gave the skirt a little tug, noticing that it was physically attached to the leg, almost as if it was part of Vee's skin.
"Clothes are hard to make real..." Vee muttered.
"How are you able to do this?" Manny asked, standing off to the side. "I mean, we saw you do it last night, but I...I still don't know how this is possible."
"I don't know either," Camila said. "All the research I came up with turned up zip. As far as I can tell, this is something that only she could do."
"The others could do it too," Vee said, getting a curious look from Manny and Camila.
"Others?" They both asked.
"Yeah. Others like me. There was I. And II. And III."
"Wait..." Camila held up a hand and thought for a second. "I...II--One, Two, and Three?"
Vee nodded. "Yeah, that's what they called them too."
"They?" Manny asked.
"It's these people she keeps mentioning," Camila explained. "I tried to get her to draw a picture, but she...doesn't have Luz's talents."
"I'm sorry..." Vee quietly said.
"Hey, hey, it's fine." Camila put a gentle hand on Vee's shoulder. "There's nothing for you to be sorry for. Me and Manny just have a lot of questions. You're a mystery with not a lot of answers, and not getting them is making things..."
"Difficult," Manny chimed in once Camila trailed off. "It's difficult for us, because knowing those answers will help us to help you."
"Right. And it's fine if you don't know a lot. You're still just a child after all. In fact, tell you what." Camila stopped her inspection to stand by Manny, looking at Vee patiently. "Tell us what you do know. We can just go from there."
"Or at least share what you're comfortable with," Manny added.
Vee sat in her chair, her head tilted downward as she twidded her new thumbs. They felt dainty and soft to her. "I'm...a bass-ill-isk. There were a few of us in cages, with these...bad men looking at us and making us do stuff. They made us do things and then hurt us for not doing the things they wanted. And they made me...suck magic. Out of rats. Poor little rats.
"Magic made me feel nice, but the rats made me feel bad. And I could change my body, but I would need more magic to do that again. But staying changed was easy. They made us stay changed for a looooooong time before making us change back. One said it was too weird seeing a little girl in cage.
"We all did what we were told, but One didn't like it. She broke out and freed everyone, getting us all to run. III and IV took me, ran away until we got to forest and said to hide as good as I can. I slithered and saw woman go through big glowy thing. I went through it and found a new, different woods and I went to tree crying and...Luz found me. Then...bigger man found me. And...all that is all I know."
Vee looked up from her thumbs to now look at Camila and Manny. They looked shocked, horrified, and...sad. So sad.
"...I'm sorry..." Vee whispered, looking at her thumbs again. "III and IV said not tell people about me before going to hide. But you were nice. And you wanted to know what I know."
Nothing happened for a minute. Camila and Manny remained silent for a lengthy amount of time, with Vee not sure if they were in the room anymore.
That is until they both came over and wrapped their arms around Vee. She wasn't sure what they were doing, but it felt...nice.
In fact, it felt amazing.
"You poor child," Camila said, her voice sounding...broken. "You had a horrible life. Such a horrible life."
"I have a lot more questions," Manny added, his voice broken too. "But forget those for now. Because they don't matter now."
"What matters is making sure you don't go through something as horrendous as that ever again."
"We promise."
Vee was silent now. Even more silent than she's ever been since being here. A silence that caused tears to fall down her face, but not because of sadness. Vee was sure what sadness felt, but this?
This was something different.
Something new.
Something...warm.
She soon wrapped her arms around Camila and Manny as well.
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nethhiri ¡ 6 months ago
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Marooned: Chapter 40
Kid x FemReader x Killer
Warnings: violence, gore, body horror
Reckless and Feckless
You were ready to find that little bilge rat who interrupted you and beat him so hard his grandkids would feel it. However, the moment you stepped on deck, there was a strange atmosphere and everyone was looking in the same direction. You picked out the orange puff of hair in the crowd and headed for Quincy. 
"Hey. What's going on?"
"We're in trouble." 
You strained your neck to peer around her, but couldn't see. Over the murmuring of hushed voices in the crowd, you heard your name being called. The crowd parted to let you through. Is someone hurt? All four officers were standing together in intense conversation at the helm. You approached them and saw that they were looking at the map you had annotated. Your brows furrowed. You hadn't seen them look this serious before. Kid beckoned you forward. He pointed at the map.
"We're approaching this area, where there should be a patrol, and it could be two ships again." Kid pointed behind their ship. "There are two ships tailing us." 
"So we're being caged in."
He nodded. 
"We can't take all of them at once." Killer stated. "We have to stagger them."
"What's the plan?" You asked.
Kid didn't answer. "Have ya been in this situation before?"
You nodded slowly, understanding where this was going. "But my ship was faster than Victoria." 
Kid made a noise of frustration. "I'll be damned before we run away," Kid said through gritted teeth.
"I know you didn't just imply what I think you implied." You glared at him. Kid and yourself had similar beliefs when it came to being a captain. You never turned away from a fight if you could help it. 
Kid scoffed. "Ya took on four at once?" 
"You think I can take 4 cocks but not 4 ships? What kind of amateur do you take me for? It's the same principle. Stagger them, as Killer said."
Heat was pinching the bridge of his nose, trying not to laugh. It wasn't the time. 
"Two on one and then another two on one is still a lot," Wire said, unbothered by your crude remark.
"It won't be two on one. It will be one on one. But it's all about timing." You looked at the map. The ship would be entering an area of fog. Perfect. "How fast is top sailing speed?" 
"In strong wind, 10 knots," Wire said.
"Listen to me." Your tone was much more serious than it had been. "If you want to do this, you have to trust me. Otherwise we're gonna get torn the fuck up." You looked at Kid. "Your choice, Captain." There wasn't a combative tone to your voice. If he wanted to do differently, this was his ship. If they were asking you, it was probably because they had discussed other plans already and gotten nowhere. 
"Go ahead, Rotten." 
You explained how you had faced this in the past and won. You had only done it once, and it was pretty rough, but they didn't need to know that. With Kid's and your devil fruit, it would make a world of difference. Killer and Wire pressed you for more details. They were the ones who usually came up with strategies. But they were satisfied enough with your answers that they agreed to your plan with minimal tweaks. The plan was to hit the first ship as hard as possible and a fast as possible so they had no time to react. If you could cripple that ship from the get go, you only had to deal with the remaining ship before the ones trailing you got there. And to give you the best chance, you were at full sail. The more distance you put between the ship and the ones behind, the more time you would have to handle the others. And if you had enough time, you could set up for an ambush. 
When the ship was in range, Kid could sense where the enemy was by the metal on board their ships. Every cannon was moved to one side and fired on Kid's signal. He also took the liberty of dropping the second ship's anchors to prevent them from pulling alongside them while they were still handling the first ship. The discord amongst them was evident. They weren't expecting to be the ones surprised. The tailing ships must not have updated them about the Victoria's increase in speed. The cannons heavily wounded the first ship, and Kid finished it off by himself with a few well-aimed hits to its bow. The ship was close enough to its partner that most of the men crossed over to that ship. The amount of crew didn't matter, but one ship was certainly better than two, especially if two more were swiftly approaching. 
The Victoria Punk circled around to the other ship, where its crew was hurriedly preparing to fight. You and Mini were posted on deck, Mini in her armor. It wasn't lost on you that there were some alterations made to it that you hadn't made. Kid thought he was so slick with these things. Once you found that a broken hinge on a cabinet had been repaired even though you hadn't told anyone it was broken. Once you had found all the medical instruments had been sharpened and/or polished. He never mentioned anything, but you knew it was him.
If it had not been for the impending excitement of using your devil fruit, you would have been almost bored. Anyone who approached you was promptly shot in the forehead. Some times you would let Mini handle one and she would gore them, shaking her head back and forth vigorously until they slipped off onto the ground. All the while, you kept your ears alert and watched the scuffle vigilantly in order to tend to the wounded. Looking around, you could see why you were bored. Killer was fairly close to you and was taking out people left and right. You preferred being on the upper deck to have a bird's eye view, but Killer was stealing your joy. 
Emma was near Pomp and they seemed to be doing fine. Reck and Bubblegum had it handled. Dive was biting someone's neck; she's fine. Mosh, Hip, and House, who you didn't know very well, were getting shoved into the center of the deck, pushed until their backs were touching and surrounded on all sides. They could use your help. You directed Mini to where you wanted to go, hopping on her back as she jumped the railing. Her belly was armored so neither of you worried about projectiles or blades from below. It helped that no one expects a boar to fall out of the sky. 
You vaulted from Mini's back towards the fray while she hung back for a moment to finish stomping on the pirates she'd used as a landing pad. You were conserving your devil fruit power until you needed to use it. If anything went wrong, they would need it. Anyone in your way was gutted by your blade or shot point blank, or both. When you got to the center of the deck, you found your cremates in a worse situation. They weren't even attacking. All they could do was defend, the way they were surrounded. You threw yourself into the mix, using your blade so your bullets didn't pass through and hit your comrades. Mini was at your back, keeping anyone else who wanted in at bay. You yanked one of them back by the hair and put your blade through his neck. That got the attention of his pals and drew them away from Mosh, Hip, and House. Not all of them broke away, but enough that the other three could get back on the offensive. 
You flicked the blood off your knife in the direction of the three pirates that decided to turn on you, splattering their faces with their friend. You really wished you had a second blade at time like this. The first man came at you with his sword held too high. Before he could bring it down, you closed the distance and thrust your gunblade upward under his chin, pulling the trigger. As long as you aimed this way, you couldn't accidentally hit anyone. A fine rain of red and gray bits fell to the deck. You looked at the other two, who turned to run. 
"Mini!" You shouted for her. The boar turned and saw what you wanted. You chased them down with her. The boar jerked her head in a way to knock them over with her tusks. You jumped on one's back while she held the other down. "Too cowardly to finish a fight you started?" You knelt on his back and pulled his head up with his hair, slitting his throat with your blade. You saw a shadow as someone approached while you were still on one knee. You somersaulted through his legs and popped back to your feet on the other side, one of your favorite moves. Whipping around before he had a chance to do anything, you shot him and he dropped. Mini had squished the other man beyond recognition. 
You stayed where you were and continued to fight in the middle of the deck, where the enemy was the thickest. No one had called for your help so far. You ran into Quincy who was fighting nearby. "Doing ok?" You asked her between parries. 
"Fine. Can you look at my back?" 
You called Mini to cover you while you examined her. Quincy never stopped fighting, which made it difficult to visualize, but you could see a red stripe seeping into her clothes. It wasn't bad, you still scolded her though. "Next time, call me sooner." You put your hand over it for a few seconds and upon removal, the skin was healed. Quincy had this area down, so you and Mini darted off in a different direction. 
They must have had two or three times as many people as you did. It seemed like they kept coming. Curiously, you noticed the stream of opponents slow to a trickle. Your eyes caught sight of Heat nearby. Stop taking my kills. You moved again and the same thing happened with Killer. Still, you moved again. It was pissing you off. You let it slide after that, as you began to hear cries for help. You went to each one, healing mostly light wounds. It seemed the throngs of enemy pirates were subsiding. You could hear screams from the enemy ship, where Kid and Wire had gone off to early on. Your last job was Reck, who got hit pretty good again. 
"Reck, what the fuck?" You repaired the gash in his thigh, dangerously close to the main artery. "Do I need to babysit you?" 
He looked a bit ashamed. "No, Doc. I'm sorry." 
You finished up, "Get your ass back in there. Start throwing bodies overboard so we don't trip over them. We're not done yet." 
Heat set fire to their ship and the men left over were being finished off by Kid, who seemed to be having fun. You clapped to get their attention, "Hey, quit fucking around! We have to use this time to get in position." They seemed to have forgotten the situation. 
"Chill out, Rotten. That was a piece of cake!" Kid used his metal hand to crush another guy. "We've got this."
"That was one ship, Kid! Now we have to face two more, after already fighting two entire crews." Your temper was quickly rising, along with your stress level. He had been warned. 
"What do we need to do?" Wire had walked over to you. 
"We need to get away from this wreck and set up to am..." Your voice faded off as you caught sight of a canon blast through the fog. "Oh fuck. KID!" You pointed in the direction of the ship. The urgency in your voice got his attention in time for him to stop the cannonball. You saw similar flashes on the other side. Fuck they had gotten the jump on you, which is what you were afraid of. First, you didn't get fucked and now your plan was getting fucked instead. Can't have anything nice. 
"Not good." Wire said.
You pressed your fist into your forehead, trying to come up with plan B. There was no chance of outrunning them, even if they wanted to at this point. If they could destroy one ship quickly, they would have a better chance at getting out of this. Stuck between both of their ships like a sitting duck was certain death. The only thing you could think of was this thing you tried once. And it worked. But it was a smaller scale. You shrugged out of your jacket and pushed it to Wire. "A few things. One, don't let anything happen to my jacket. Two, when I give you the signal, get this ship the fuck out of here. Three, do not fire any cannons at that ship." You pointed at the ship closest to you.
Wire would normally be resistant to anyone but Kid or Killer telling him what to do, but given the circumstances and the commanding tone in your voice, he didn't fight it. "Kid isn't going to be happy." Wire knew how mad Kid was the last time you did something stupid. And he knew how to read between the lines. He knew you wanted him to move the ship whether you were on it or not. 
"Would he be happier at the bottom of the ocean?" You challenged. "I'll make it back. And I know you won't complain if I somehow don't." 
Wire didn't say anything to stop you. It wasn't true, what you said. He cared about what happened to you because Kid cared. It had taken him a while to come around. What you were doing now proved to him that you were loyal. This put your personal mission behind Kid's. He thought it was the latent captain in you that felt responsible for everyone on the ship and that was admirable. 
You went to the dinghy that was tethered to the ship. The plan was to sneak aboard their ship, rig it to explode, and send it directly into the wreck of the ship that Heat set on fire. If you were lucky, the remaining ship would also be crippled in the blast. If you were unlucky, the Victoria would be caught too. But there was no other way that you could make it out from two ships flanking and relentlessly firing cannons from both sides. You swung one foot over the edge of the ship into the dinghy. Briefly pausing to look at the water below. What if you fell in? Who would know? As you steeled yourself to commit, you were suddenly yanked backwards, hitting the deck hard. The wind was knocked out of you and you coughed, trying to suck air back into your lungs. 
"And what the FUCK do ya think yer doing? Have ya not learned?" Kid grabbed you and brought you to your feet so you were toe to toe with him. "Stop going off on yer own! That's an order!"
Your eyes flicked to Wire behind him, not meeting your eyes, possibly even appearing guilty. "Have you not learned? I'm saving your ass for a second time because none of you can fucking LISTEN!" There was a pleading desperation to your voice. You grabbed his wrist, prying his hand off you and throwing it back at him. "I have to go off on my own! The only person I can count on is myself!"
Those words wounded him, and it was purely his fault that they did so. He wanted you to count on him. You couldn't do that if he went back on his word. It wasn't hostility reflected in your face, it was worry. Kid thought you were willfully trying to piss him off when Wire came to warn him of what you were about to do. He was instantly regretful. It was clear to him you were doing it out of concern for his crew. This was not the time for words, not that he would ever give you a direct apology. "Fine! I'm listening now." He folded his arms. "Go on then. What's yer plan?"
The ship rocked with hits from cannonballs as you rushed to explain. Kid voiced his agreement with your plan. It was a good plan. Better now that he was in it. "Come on, Kid. I've already been held back too long." You started to get back in the dinghy when you were grabbed again.
"We ain't takin no fucking dinghy." Kid picked you up and jumped from the banister, a violet orb surrounding the both of you as he magnetized himself to something aboard the other ship. He was shocked you didn't say something wise to him and noticed your white knuckle grip on his shirt. Maybe he should have warned you since you had never seen him do that before. "Do yer thing. I'm taking out their cannons." Kid set you on the deck, eyes lingering on you for an extra few seconds. 
You nodded and got to work. A yellow circle appeared below you and you disappeared below deck. You managed to land silently and waited for the commotion Kid caused to draw the attention of anyone who was down here. They cleared out fairly quickly and you went from barrel to barrel, crate to crate, turning all of the contents into gunpowder, unless it was filled with alcohol, then you left it. The sound of someone behind you made you pivot to face them. Your face drained of blood. They were holding a gun. 
"These barrels are full of gunpowder. Do you know what will happen if you fire that down here?"
"I don't give a fuck. My brothers were on those ships you sunk. I'll blow myself up if it means I get revenge." He pointed the gun at one of the barrels.
You threw yourself in front of him, grabbing the gun and blocking its path with your own body. With your other hand, you were pushing him back against the wall, using your power to fuse him with the ship itself. He dropped the gun and twitched as his brain misfired. Half his head was gone within the wall. There was a sharp pain in your side. What hadn't misfired, was his gun. Luckily, your organs prevented them from making the barrels explode prematurely. You took a deep breath and healed yourself around the bullets. You couldn't take them out without help, but you wouldn't bleed out. Without missing a beat, you went through the entire storage area, turning the ship into one huge bomb. 
When it was done, you ran up the stairs to the main deck, sealing off the deck below so that nobody could accidentally set it off while you were still on board. You ran towards the helm, cutting down anyone who got in your way. You could hear Kid behind you somewhere laughing. Using your whole strength, you turned the helm as far as it would go, directing the ship to take a sharp turn, heading straight for the flaming mass floating in the water. You jumped at the sound of a clang close to the back of your head. You turned cautiously, catching a glimpse of purple crackling energy covering a sword floating behind you, blocking the path of another sword. 
"Damn, Rottie. Yer observation haki does suck." 
When the ship was headed in a straight line, you froze the wheel so it would continue in that direction. "Why would I need that when you're on my heels like such a devoted guard dog?" You stepped past him as he cut down the man who attacked you. "I wonder who's better, you or Mini?"
"ME!" Kid was offended first, then realized what you said. "I'm not yer dog!"
"Quit barking. Let's get out of here." You stood there, waiting for Kid to use his devil fruit. You looked at him, questioningly. You were absolutely not about to leap into his arms or offer up yourself to be held. He was going to have to do it. 
Kid scowled at you. "No. Show me how ya think ya were gonna get off this ship by yerself, since ya can't count on anyone." 
You glanced at the fire as the ship was rapidly approaching. "Are you fucking for real?" You never broke your gaze from his as you lifted your gun to shoot through the body of someone who rushed at you. You saw the twitch of his lips into a shit-eating grin. He wanted to prove a point. "Fine. I don't like being picked up anyway." You could prove a point, too.
Kid gave the signal to Wire.
You had to predict where the Victoria would be when it sailed so that you could plan this correctly. You looked up at the crow's nest, which was separate from the main sail. It seemed like the right height. You fought off some of the crew as they rushed you, careful not to let any bullets be aimed downward. Then, you put both hands on the spire of wood, making it splinter just as your own mast had when it fell. This was more controlled, breaking in such a way that it was still attached and so that in fell precisely in a particular direction. While it fell, you defended your position until it was at an angle where you wouldn't fall off if you ran up it. Climbing onto the wood, you had to start moving on your hands and knees across the length, then as it leveled out you got to your feet and sprinted down it. Kid was floating in his stupid fucking hamster ball, just watching, surely waiting for you to fall so he could save you and prove that you couldn't do it by yourself.
You felt the wood vibrate under your feet and heard a splash or two as pirates came to chase you, some falling into the drink. The Victoria, had started to move and was soon to be directly in front of your bridge, while this ship had about a minute until it was blown to smithereens. The wood was slippery and the width began to narrow. The crow's nest landed wrong, so you would have to climb over it instead of crawling through the hole in the bottom. You jumped and clung to the bottom, wedging your boots between slats to push yourself up. You felt a hand around your ankle, pulling you down. One of the pirates had caught up. You tried kicking to shake his grip, but he wouldn't let go. There was a yellow flash before you felt your leg be released. He didn't need control of his hands where he was going. 
You scrambled the rest of the way over the crow's nest and continued running; you were nearly there. The mistake was looking down. The spire was so narrow and slippery and the ocean was so cold and black. You lost your footing, slipping with either leg on both sides. You let out a pained grunt as you landed pussy first. Not exactly the wood you wanted to be on. You picked yourself up. This ship was about to make contact with the flames and your ship was about to be too far to jump to. The spire was still slightly at an upward angle, making it more difficult as you got closer to the end.
The deck was too far and you weren't going to ask Kid for help like last time. Everyone was still fighting so there was no one to make a rough cushion for your fall. But the sail, the sail was about the same level as you were. You sprinted as fast as you could manage without slipping and aimed for the sail, praying you didn't go through it. You expected to sort of bounce out of it once you hit the canvas, instead you sort of rolled all the way down to the beam where it was attached, hit that, and then bounced onto the deck.
Rolling on to your hands and knees, you winced. There might be bruised ribs. An arm was extended and you grabbed it. It was Kid pulling you up on your feet. You smirked at him through the discomfort.
"Ya got balls. I'll give ya that."
"Not anymore. You see me crush my fucking cunt? My balls are surely flattened now." You were laughing but it fucking hurt. 
Kid shook his head. "Why ya gotta be so stubborn?" 
You rolled your eyes. At least you were self-aware when it came to your stubbornness. "I wasn't worried. My big red guard dog was right there if I fell." You smirked, patting a hand on his chest. 
Abruptly, there was the sound of an enormous explosion, followed by a brisk shockwave and the rolling heat radiating from the flames. Instinctually, you shrunk closer to Kid, not because you were scared, but because a meat shield would catch any shrapnel. Also instinctually, Kid protectively pulled you into him with his metal arm. You couldn't see the explosion due to Kid's stature, but you could see the way orange illuminated his hair like his hair was fire itself, the way his amber eyes scanned his crew to make sure no one was hurt, and the way they flicked back to your face, that was already looking up at him. His heartbeat under your hand quickened and you both jerked away from each other.
You avoided looking at the other's face. You coughed out a, "Thanks, Kid," before scampering off to find Mini.
Kid felt disappointment at first. He really wanted to prove that he would have your back. But you hadn't needed him at all. He should have expected as much. He was aware of some of your past exploits. He thought back to your words and realized that you had acknowledged him, twice even, though the first time you hadn't fully meant it. His chest swelled a bit. He was a good guard dog, wasn't he? He wasn't fond of being called a dog, though, no matter how cute it was coming from your mouth. Your mouth. He swallowed at the thought of kissing you when he saw that you looking up at him. There was something about that look, it was soft and so warm and he wanted to dive in. 
Your heart was beating out of your chest. Not from jumping off a ship destined to explode. Not from almost falling into the water. Not even from the explosion itself. No, it was threatening to escape your ribcage because of Kid's expression. Every other time he wanted to kiss you, he had a look of hunger or lust. This time it was... adoration? You couldn't place it and you didn't like it. It made you sweat. 
The ship was unscathed in the explosion, and the last remaining enemy ship took some damage, but not enough to cripple it. You were nearly finished. Mini protected you while you healed those that were injured while you were busy. The worst of it was out of the way. You could relax a little, relatively speaking. In your anxiety, you forgot temporarily about your anger. You were muttering to yourself about these stupid fucking ships and how you were thisclose to losing your Killer virginity. You didn't realize you were doing it out loud until Reck, your patient, again, tried unsuccessfully to console you, saying that you were super hot and he was sure Killer was totally into you. You blinked at him, only slightly embarrassed about grumbling out loud, and gave him a firm bap on the forehead, telling him to worry about his own problems. 
Still, you hadn't really been able to take your frustration out on anyone, so you were a touch happy that the last ship wasn't badly damaged. Eagerly, you boarded the other ship to begin your therapy session. You were re-energized, grabbing men by their faces and melting their heads together. You were popping off limbs and reattaching them elsewhere. Soon, they started backing away from you, preferring to run directly into Killer's punishers or Heat's fire. Damn them, why can't they go somewhere else! It was like they were following you. You narrowed your eyes. Were they? You moved to a different section, below deck. This time, instead of fusing, you got a little more creative. You grabbed someone by the throat. They began to glow a soft yellow before getting slightly smaller, then smaller, then even more small. A wicked grin split your face in two as you shrunk him to the size of an ant and squished him between your thumb and index finger. 
You looked for another victim, glancing to see Wire hunched under the ceiling. You frowned. "Wire, go back up there. It's too small down here for you." What was with all of them?
He had a pained expression. Reluctantly, he disappeared, adjusting his hood as he did so, the top had brushed up against the ceiling and become skewed.
You continued your rampage until no one was left underneath the ship, returning to the deck to find that the only thing remaining were the dead bodies left behind. Where was the crew?
Killer had gotten a deep cut on his back, but couldn't find you anywhere. He even poked his head inside the infirmary. He scanned the deck and didn't catch sight of you, but he did see Kid, and headed over to him. Curiously, Minerva was pacing up and down the railing. Did she go overboard? That thought chilled him. No, Mini would have jumped in if that was the case. 
"Kid, have you seen Y/N?" 
He huffed. "No. Ya were all supposed to be keeping an eye on her." Kid looked over to see Heat prepping to set the enemy ship aflame. "Heat! Wait!" The captain looked for the tallest person on the ship. "Wire get yer ass here." 
Wire and Heat joined them. "What's wrong, Cap?"
"Have either of you seen Y/N?" Killer asked.
They looked at each other. "I thought you had her." They spoke simultaneously. 
"Well, she was below deck and I was hunched over so she told me to leave."
"And ya listened?!"
"My hood was getting fucked up." Wire crossed his arms defensively. "And I told you when she was about to do something stupid, so I did my job."
The ship wasn't all too far from the one they had just left, but they had pulled the gangplank up. It was still close enough that the wind carried the sound of your voice, yelling at the top of your lungs. No wonder Mini was pacing at the railing. She could hear and smell you. 
"Fucking hell, yer all worthless." Kid realized he was going to have to get you. 
"Hey, Captain." Wire said. "I saw her shrink a guy and squish him so....be nice and apologize to her." 
You could see those morons moving around on the deck. You were yelling as loud as you could to get their attention. They fucking forgot you! They almost left you behind! You were going to have to figure out a way to use your powers to travel. You couldn't keep getting stuck like this. If you weren't exhausted, this would probably piss you off. But you were having so much fun you didn't even realize you were getting left behind in the first place, and if you were honest, it was a little bit funny. 
It was especially funny how much they all tiptoed around you afterwards. They all thought you were going to go ballistic on them for leaving you behind accidentally. Actually, you were more upset at them for following you around. You didn't know if they all did it unintentionally or if they were told to. It made you mad either way. You could handle yourself perfectly well. Yes, maybe you were complaining about only being able to count on yourself, but this was not what you meant by it. You didn't need someone on standby to come rushing to your aid, you just needed support when it mattered.
By the time everything was over, it was late afternoon. You joined the women in the showers. You had essentially been herded there by the girls, who found it wildly entertaining that you had been forgotten about and were very excited to know how you were going to hold it over the captain's head. While you were in there, you healed a few scratches that you happened to see on the bare skin of your cremates. You decided you were done in there when Dive started a soap bubble fight. Everyone was in good spirits after overcoming a very daunting battle. 
All you wanted to do was take a nap. On your way to the women's quarters, you ran into Killer, who never got his wound healed. He expected you to come find him after getting changed, but you pushed him toward his cabin. Why bother going all the way there just to come back, and for what? Clothes? You were too tired to care. Killer had cleaned off, too, so the wound was nicely free of any dirt or debris. He stood awkwardly in the middle of his room, stripping himself of his shirt and turning his back to you. It was a good size, stretching from shoulder to hip. The flesh knitted back together as you healed it.
"There. All done." 
Killer turned around to face you. "Thanks." He cleared his throat, becoming acutely aware you were solely in a towel that barely covered the tops of your thighs. Tentatively, he reached his hand out for the bit that was tucked in, tugging it free. It felt like his hand moved of its own accord.
You let your towel drop to a puddle around your feet, a bit surprised that he made a move without you having to initiate anything. 
Killer unclasped his mask. He wanted you to see how his eyes wandered over your body, appreciating every dip of your contours and every perfect imperfection that adorned your skin. He didn't think his rough fingertips even deserved to touch something so soft. "Sorry. I just... wanted to see." 
"Why don't you indulge your other four senses while you're at it?" You nudged at his hand with your fingertips. 
Killer sat down on the edge of his bed, so he wouldn't have to bend over to kiss you. He pulled you between his knees, softly coaxing your chin closer to his own with his hand on your cheek. Your lips met lightly several times over. This gentleness was new to you. You didn't mind the change of pace from your usual hard and fast preferences. You brought a knee up to rest over his, pushing against him slightly until his back met the comforter. He let you deepen the kiss, slip your tongue into his mouth, still slow and sensual. 
Killer pushed himself further up on the bed, never letting your lips come apart from his own. You fell to his side, legs tangling with his. Your hand was wrapped in his hair, as his was in yours. It was strange, the way you were content to stay like this. Of course, you wanted to fuck him, but this was something you hadn't really experienced, this slow, burning passion at your core. 
When you finally pulled away to breathe, you noticed that he was just as tired as you were. Neither of you wanted to move. So you stayed as you were, tangled up together with your foreheads touching, exchanging the same air back and forth. He kissed you a few more times and you kissed him a few more times, and neither of you were sure when, but you both fell asleep, fingers entwined, soft smiles on your faces.
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