#rude of him to not invite Ren to this bit

[climb10]

The theatrics, here? It’s giving Shakespearean tragedy.

[katkbc]

kat is currently thinking of…

GOING TO A CHRISTMAS PARTY WITH TOXIC!EREN…

————————————

MINORS DNI.

note:tbh i had a lil fun writing this! there will be a part 2 w smut but i kinda wanted to make a little story cuz why not? also this is WAY longer than i intended it to be.. sorry….

cw: fem! reader, strong language, violence, reader is a bit of an airhead + sensitive, use of alcohol, angst, eren is toxic , all characters aged up to 20+, im a sucker for toxic eren🫦 also he’s a bit possessive

————————————

summary : you and eren went out to a christmas party, what’s the worst that could happen?

“how you holding up?” your boyfriend asks. as of right now you’ve had a little too much to drink at connie’s christmas party, not to an extent though. to be honest, eren didn’t expect this much people to show up. music is blasting in the back, people are chatting and dancing, some are drunk, others are playing beer pong, this party was for sure a blast right now. you and eren decided to take shots earlier with connie, jean, mikasa, and armin, but clearly you went overboard a bit. you’re currently on the couch next to eren, his hand on your thigh while your leaned over against his shoulder.

“i’m fine ‘ren.. trust me.” you reply, your words slurring together slightly. you take another sip of your beer, but suddenly it disappears. “hey, no more.” eren scolds. eren had decided to invite you to the party because you needed to have a little fun in your life. it’s not like you never went out, you just preferred to stay at home. but when you get drunk, it’s a whole new personality you’ve unlocked.

you came to this party in a strapless bodycon dress,in a nice velvet color. it hugs your hips very nicely and makes your breasts slightly pop out, you wore this with a simple and nice white button up cover up, which you clearly didn’t button up. eren didn’t really approve of what you wore, but man, you looked like a goddess. he couldn’t say no to those beautiful doe eyes you got.

“sorry…” you apologize. sometimes eren would get a little rude with you, but he would quickly realize once you start sulking. “it’s ok, princess. just please don’t over drink.”he smiles at you, and starts circling his thumb on your thigh. you feel hear building up in your core, but it’s just you having to pee really bad. you grab eren’s hand off your thigh. “i need to pee really quick eren, i’ll be back.” you give him an innocent smile. as you get up, he lightly pulls you back. “let me walk with you, it’s crowded.” he insists. “i’m fineee, i’m not a baby eren.” you reply. you grab his face and give him a peck on his cheek. “it’s just really quick..” “alright, don’t go running off though.” he replies.

after washing your hands you walk out the bathroom. you’re walking down the hall back to the main room, slightly stumbling each step. “hey, are you.. good?” a voice calls out to you. the voice belongs to a very nice looking guy. dirty blonde hair which is slicked back, and nice hazel eyes. “yes.. i am. i think.” you think about what you just said. the alcohol in your system is starting to kick in even more. “what’s your name, pretty girl?” he offers a handshake. “y/n, and what’s your name?” you shake his hand, and give him a friendly smile. your cheeks are slightly tinted red. the guy admires you, and can’t help but think ‘damn, she’s gorgeous’.

“porco galliard, you have a pretty name by the way.” he compliments. “thank you!” you let go of his hand. “so… are you here by yourself?” he asks. when he asks, your mind is slowly starting to go foggy, forgetting certain things, and a person. “i’m just trying to find my way out of here.” you ignore the question. “can you help me please…” you plead, looking at him with puppy eyes. “how could i say no to a pretty face like you, where to?” he pulls you close to his side, aware that you aren’t in a great state of mind right now. he doesn’t realize what he has coming.

“yo, eren you good?” connie asks. it’s been about 20 minutes since you left to use the bathroom. your phone is dead, and the house is very crowded, eren is starting to get worried. he would probably have a heart attack if he knew you were with another guy currently. “i’ve called her like what… 15 fucking times and she won’t answer!” he lashes out. “woah calm down..” armin sits himself on the couch next to eren. “how about let’s look for her, she’s probably just lost, you know how she is.” he tries to lighten the mood.

eren wasn’t exactly the best boyfriend. he usually gets angry quickly, and was possessive when it came to you. arguments would lead to you crying and him reassuring you, even though half the time he would start the arguments. but you still loved him no matter what, he’s your baby. and he loved you just as much, probably even more. he’s just ‘looking out for you’.

“yeah, we didn’t expect this much people to come, maybe we should look for her.” jean chimes in. “alright, let’s get going.” armin suggests. eren and him get off up the couch, meanwhile jean has already started looking.

meanwhile…

the sound of crickets chirp outside. in the duration of eren freaking out, porco took you outside for some fresh air, away from the overwhelming party. you needed it, since you were absolutely out of it. the night sky is beautiful, the moon shining which provided some light. you two were sitting on some steps in the backyard. “so… what are some things you like?” porco makes conversation. “i really like cats.” you say. “oh really? what do you like about them?” he asks. “they’re just s’ooo cute! me and my boyfriend adopted one not that long ago and he’s the cutest thing alive!” you ramble. “boyfriend?” he asks. “yeah, my boyfriend is the best. sometimes he can be a little mean though, and it makes me sad.” you say, sadness reminiscing in your tone. porco puts his nicely sized hand on your back and starts rubbing in circles.

“why would he be mean to you? you’re a really sweet girl.” he reassures you. “i don’t really know. whenever we argue sometimes it’s bad. sometimes he gets really mad and starts yelling at me, and i don’t like it. i usually cry because sometimes he’s just so mean. but it’s okay, he apologizes and then makes me feel loved!” you ramble again, words slurring together. porco looks at you. in the hour you guys have been talking he’s learned a good amount about you, but he feels like you deserve more than this so called ‘boyfriend’ you have. but again, he doesn’t really know too much details, and keeps his thoughts to himself. “well… he should honestly respect you as much as-”

“y/n!” the familiar voice calls from behind you. you look back and see the face of your boyfriend, with a look that indicates he is VERY pissed off. “what the fuck!” he yells. “don’t cause a scene eren!” armin scolds at him. “e’ren…” you hiccup. he goes over to where you and porco are sitting with armin following, with a worried look. “who the hell are you?” he looks at porco, with a disgusted look. “calm the fuck down dude, i had to take care of her since someone couldn’t..” he gives a remark. this guy was really testing erens patience. “who are you to tell me i can’t take care of my girlfriend? i was looking for her this whole time just for her to be with another guy.” he snaps back. footsteps are heard, them belonging to jean, connie, and mikasa. your vision is currently blurry, with tears flowing in your eyes. “what is going on out here?” mikasa questions. “oh shit..” connie realizes.

porco stands up and faces eren. “alright i get your her boyfriend and shit, but if you’re thinking we did something, we didn’t. she’s drunk as fuck so i offered to help her since this party is huge. be grateful i made sure she was safe, no need to go off on me.” he explains. there’s a pause of silence, until eren breaks it. “listen, i could honestly care less. i don’t want you near my girl.” he threatens. “eren… please stop.” you plead, looking up at the scene. “you don’t have any room to talk, what the fuck were you and this guy doing anyways?!” he snaps.

you hold back your tears. “we weren’t doing anything eren, don’t make this a big deal.. please.” you were stumbling over your words. this was all too overwhelming, since you came just to have a good time. you should’ve known how eren would’ve gotten.

“shut the fuck up y/n!” he looks at you with flames bursting in his eyes. “i don’t wanna hear your bullshit excuses.” everyone nearby looks at the current scene that’s happening, and you can’t stand it anymore. your mind is fuzzy, and the tears that were at bay on your eyes start slowly falling down your cheeks. you hated when eren would yell at you. now that he’s yelling at you in front of other people, you felt helpless. you get up and leave the scene, leaving everyone behind.

“eren what is wrong with you?” mikasa breaks the sudden silence. she then leaves the scene to go find you. “learn some respect, that’s your girlfriend.” porco remarks. eren looks at porco with hatred, not caring that he was causing an unnecessary scene. that’s just who he was. a loud and sudden sound fills the awkward silence.

eren gave porco a good punch to the face. “don’t tell me what i should learn.” at this point, eren was in rage, he could care less about anything right now. he wanted to fuck up this random ass guy who was telling him shit that related to his girlfriend. erens in the wrong but he doesn’t see it. porco returns a punch back, and this sets off a fight.

people start surrounding the area, observing what is happening. eren delivers a punch on porcos side, which makes him fall. eren steps up and is about to kick porcos face until porco drags him down suddenly, and starts punching him repeatedly. the scene is starting to get very violent, with blood drops filling the wooden patio. armin goes up and pulls back eren, but he’s still delivering blows.

“what the hell is happening?!?” a man who looks like porco arrives at the scene. another man follows behind him, tall, blonde and seems way older than the rest of the party guests. “separate them marcel what are you doing!” the guy shouts. “reiner why don’t you do something too?” jean shouts from the other side of the scene. connie goes up and helps armin pull eren off, and marcel and reiner pull porco away from eren.”

“parties over! everyone get the hell out!” connie yells. the news soon spreads around, and people start leaving before anything else happens. porco apologizes for being involved in the fight, and leaves with marcel and reiner. eren and everyone else goes inside.

“stay still.” armin commands. the party now ended, connie and jean were currently cleaning up. armin is helping clean up eren’s wounds. eren winces at the alcohol put on his wound.

“so, are you proud of being a horrible boyfriend and telling off your girlfriend in front of a crowd for no reason?” armin reminds eren. eren reflects on his actions and realizes he messed up big time. his anger always gets the best of him. “no…” he admits. “you need to go apologize to her. just to let you know she got home safe with mikasa.” the blonde tells eren.“how is she doing?” he asks, head down. “mikasa told me she wouldn’t stop crying.” eren’s emerald orbs look up.

he knew you were sensitive. he hated seeing you cry. he always tries to control his anger around you no matter what, but sometimes the littlest things will set him completely off. the guilt finally falls on him. you never argued back, no matter how much he yelled, because all you wanted was peace, and love from eren. knowing he said hurtful things to his girl is finally dwelling on him.

“i’m sorry for all the mess i caused.” eren apologizes, directing it towards everyone currently in the house. connie steps up, “listen, im not saying i forgive you, but you really have to work on yourself. you should be apologizing to y/n instead of us. what you did was really fucked up eren.” he replies. “we’re all here for you eren, just know that.” jean adds in.

as the moonlight shines, the night continues. eren, driving himself home realizes if he doesn’t work on himself, there’s a potential chance of losing you. he thinks to himself ‘i’m sorry beautiful, i would do anything for you.’ the texts he had sent you earlier sent, but you left him on read hours ago.

he cannot let jealousy and possessiveness take him over. he’s going to make it up to you, one way or another.

part 2 will be linked here !

thank you for reading :)

edit: comment if you would like to be added to a tag list for the part 2!! ^_^

[cyanide-latte]

🌹for all three of your skrunklies please :)

OOOH YESSSSS RIDDLE

🌹 what relationship does your oc have with riddle?

Copper Benoit: Since they first meet post-Overblot for Riddle while Copper is visiting NRC as a "guest", it's kind of an interesting sense of uneven footing at first. Riddle is still Riddle and being polite as decorum calls for when guests are involved, as well as firm, but I think he can tell something is off with this kid. (Perhaps he recognizes something akin to his own trauma, if not wholly the same.) Copper sees Riddle as a very responsible and formal example of an NRC student, so when he unknowingly breaks a rule and Riddle points it out, Copper apologizes for not knowing and asks if there are any other rules he should be aware of. Riddle is all too happy to answer questions (and has to remember to hold himself back a little so as not to get overbearing,) and this leaves a good impression. Copper admits he's not sure he'll remember everything but he'll try and he'd appreciate any reminders if possible, and Riddle's positive response also leaves a good impression on Copper. Once Copper becomes a student due to Plot Progression, he makes it a point to maintain a good relationship with Riddle. As far as he's concerned, if Riddle needs something, he's willing to try to make it happen if he can. I wouldn't say they're close friends or anything, but they like each other well enough and are on good terms.

Wei Renqiao: Good, good friends. They're both sophomores and met early into their freshman year due to shared classes. Riddle's respectful formality towards WRQ's culture and the latter's return on politeness and curiosity about Heartslabyul overall won immediate friendliness. Over time, they've had many discussions about their respective situations (Riddle with his childhood trauma and challenges as Housewarden, feeling like his dormmates disrespect structure that's there and reinforced by Riddle to try to help them and honor the Queen of Hearts; and Wei Renqiao struggling with the weight of being expected to be a leader to his people but clashing with his uncle's views of what that means and feeling like he's better suited to serving others by finding or creating means of accommodations for them.) This isn't to say they've not had similar discussions with others, but there's a certain level of appreciation they have when they can confide, compare, and offer their perspectives on one another's challenges or struggles. They've also got some fun moments where WRQ has astonished others (usually by picking Riddle up and carrying him when they gotta hustle to class) and rattled off the appropriate Rule to point out he's well within his rights to do something, which delights Riddle to no end. WRQ initially offers Riddle the allowance to call him "Ren", which Riddle declined prior to his Overblot arc. It didn't feel proper. Post-Overblot, with Riddle taking more time to think on the enormity of what that actually means, is working on occasionally trying to call him "Ren" as a means of signifying their friendship is also important to him, even if he's not totally comfortable using the nickname for him yet.

Chrysanthos Shroud: OH HOO HOO BOY. BOY OH BOY. RIDDLE DOES NOT LIKE CHRYS ONE BIT. Chrys is (in Riddle's opinion) extremely rude, has an inappropriate sense of humor, disrespectful, and worst of all, the instant he tries to tell Chrys he's in violation of ANY rules, Chrys seems to take this as an invitation to start doing it DELIBERATELY to enrage him, taunting the entire time. Throw in that later on, Chrys reads him like an open book reading his trauma and behavior? When Riddle sees him, it's on SIGHT. Chrysanthos for his part, is just doing his thing and being himself, and if he has no issue disturbing his little cousin's peace as a means of showing affection to Idia, you'd best believe he also has no qualms disturbing the peace of a kid who clearly has some underlying deeper issues, piss-poor coping mechanisms and an issue with boundaries when he tries to force others to mold to his coping mechanisms. Chrys is a punk through and through, of course he's going to then break more rules to prove a point to Riddle. He sees it as a sort of cause-and-effect Riddle needs to start recognizing. Eventually he does read Riddle quite frankly to his face; it's just how Chrys is, and it's kind of his way of trying to show compassion and benevolence, offering some difficult insight and possible wisdom. Despite the way he likes to act like a troll, Chrys genuinely pities Riddle and hopes he'll eventually overcome the things that continue shackle and suffocate him.

Taglist (this is a WIP and if you want to be removed from the list, just let me know!) : @tixdixl @ramshacklerumble @inmateofthemind @changeofheart69 @thehollowwriter @blithesharem @theleechyskrunkly @rainesol

[reap-the-game]

captainqster:

He liked her consistency, if nothing else. It seemed she was genuine in having no intentions with him apart from what had been offered here in this private place, and for that he was grateful. He’d had enough of coercion and slavery. The promise of escape and all that might come after was making him ever gladder, ever giddier, though he would not allow it to show beyond a glimmer in the eyes and the tiny smirk he could not get rid of. There would be no jumping or whooping. Ren was too old and too spent for such frivolity now.

But there was something else he liked and that was the dry way in which his new captain requested some space. While Ren did not grant her request, his smirk turned into a blameless smile. Best hold it steady lest he laugh. She was a prickly thing, wasn’t she? And far from what he’d expected when she’d snatched his throat on deck and made her claim.

What he’d expected was to be on his back already, strung to some manner of headboard or beam or something, stoic as he could manage as this woman took her pleasure. A better prospect than her many men, at least, they with their rough hands and stubble and whatever manner of phallic implements they could creatively conjure. He’d have liked her for the pure fact that she wasn’t them.

She really wanted nothing to do with him, at least not along those lines. He liked her for that. He liked her for the thorny way she asked him to move and quickly gave up, accepting his presence without pleasure or fuss. It was a small amusement after a terrible day of fighting and being kidnapped.

And her ear—that upright, fluffy appendage with its attention turned to him—did he like that, too?

No. Not one bit, but if she’d been male he’d have hated them. An old rejection soured in his heart as he traced their black and ruby lengths, but sputtered out half-heartedly. She was female and an exile besides. Why let his festering resentment latch onto her? He suspected their kinship was what saved him in the first place.

“The Bloody Martyr,” he said. “A good name for a pirate ship. Did you name her yourself?”

Good in his opinion, anyway. He’d served on several ships across two decades. The Jade Reaver, Marlo’s Bounty, and smaller vessels made for slipping about quietly and bearing appropriately slippery names. He knew ships. He knew sails and knots and cannons, and had no intention of telling her this lest she decide he might make a useful crewmember.

Not this time. Not today.

He watched her watch him, saw how her eyes found his scars and traced them. Some might find blatant staring rude, but he was not one of them, being often guilty of the same. She could stare if she liked. She could even touch, and he might tell her an unhappy story, being not the most secretive man that ever lived, and her a Viera besides.

Though her knife made him nervous, he stood squarely as she cut his bindings, then sighed with relief and rubbed at his raw wrists. The flesh was torn around them; ugly, bloody marks, but new and shallow enough to heal with minimal scarring. He’d not been tied long and was grateful for that. In their current state they’d heal fast enough and perform their articulated purpose just fine.

“Thank you.” Ah, manners. They were not his strong suit after the life he’d lived, but they were there all the same, and often came out only when he found something funny. “If you did not tie me up at night, I’d think you were very stupid. You’ll get no argument from me. Where will you have me sleep?”

At her invitation, he eyed the food on the table with interest. Wearing armor and wielding a sword and shield took it out of a man. After fighting heretics and kicking about like a stranded fish in her men’s arms, he was famished and in need of calories. An apple was taken, an appreciative nod given to her before he bit into it.

He was in no state to deny food or water. If Ren was meant to slip away, to sneak, he needed his wits and strength about him, but he must calculate his intake not to offend his captor. Take too much from her plate and he would become a burdensome source of resentment. Test her patience with an unsatisfied belly, and her men might pin him as the reason for her mood, and thus take action.

His was in a dangerous position. Gratitude and reference would be the things to get him out of here safely, now that his panic had calmed.

“What brought your crew to this port today? Opportunity?” he asked knowingly, for he and his men had been the ones to create it without meaning to.

reap-the-game:

She supposed it was a good name, even a fitting name for a vessel used to the ends she guided it to. Unlawful, quite dreadful to anyone who got caught on the wrong side of her interest, what have you. Still, “No,” came her answer, simple at first, though she did deign to elaborate upon it a modicum. “It was a name she already had under her previous captain.” And she had simply seen no reason to rename it. The ship had already had a name for itself, a reputation created by the captain she had taken it from—as that of a pirate vessel, fearsome in its own right, and more fearsome yet for the loose whole it was a part of.

Until the fool had tried to ruin it all. It wasn’t only her that it had seemed like a suicide to, a deluded, narcissistic grab for power that there was no reason to think would be allowed by the higher powers. ‘He’ll get us all killed,’ had been her argument. Did the lot of them really want to go down with a doomed ship?

Had her words rang on deaf ears, she would have taken it upon herself to simply leave before vengeance fell down upon the captain and his loyal crew—but they had not. Many of her then-peers had proven sympathetic, agreeing with the reason within her claims. Enough of them that simpler than to leave, it was to take command of the ship.

Command that she had not relinquished since. All she had had to do was make it known the ship had a new captain, a feat made quite easy by the eagerness of the gossipy sort to share everything they heard—and then, the less easy affair of proving herself as competent and as dangerous as the captain she had led a mutiny against.

But she had. She had succeeded in that, and the ship that became hers had not lost its reputation as sails in the horizon you did not wish to see.

As Ren had almost felt for himself, and as some others were feeling for themselves. She could only hope he counted himself as lucky as he truly was, and still, being grateful for anything at all came as a surprise. Giovanna’s brows raised at the ‘thank you’ he spoke for having his arms freed, but after a mental bid to shrug it off, she gave a simple, “You’re welcome,” in return.

Of course, if he wanted to give more than hollow words, he could show his thankfulness by not making mischief with the freedom his arms were granted, but time would tell if he’d bother with that much.

But sleeping arrangements… Hm. In the name of keeping her peace of mind, there was really only one place. “The floor,” then, was her answer, a sweeping gesture of her hand pointing towards the solid divider by the door. He could freely assume the suggestion was he’d be tied to it, and that was indeed her intent. “I would give you the couch, were I able to secure you to it.” Alas, there was nothing suitable near that piece of furniture.

And all of this while she would lay comfortably in her own, soft bed with blankets and pillows. Wasn’t the world just so unfair?

It could be far worse for him too, though. She could have forced him onto her bed to use his body like a toy just for her, could have denied him food for the whole duration until he was weak from hunger. Here he was instead, free to walk around her cabin, free to have a bite to eat, and willing to converse instead of… Whatever it was he would have done if she really had forced herself on him. Trying to deny his body’s likely responses, or glaring at her, or what have you. That was what she would have done, but she had never been on the other side of it—at least not as anything more than a spectator.

“Aye,” Giovanna confirmed his assumption before bringing the bottle to her lips and downing the rest of its contents. The empty thing was set on the table before she sat herself in one of the two chairs placed around the table, leaning back to kick her feet onto the table and threading her fingers behind her head. There she watched him idly, trying to stomp down on how simultaneously wrong and right this felt.

Right for being in the proximity of another Viera, even if a male that she wouldn’t have usually seen very often at all, relegated as they were into the woods instead of villages. She could count the times she had interacted with a male of their race on one hand, before this. Never had she even laid down with one, having simply left around the time she would have become of breeding age—and a girl younger than that had few reasons to speak with any man that visited the village.

Wrong for… Where they were. Who she was, now, here, outside the jungle. What their current roles were, her the captor and him the captive.

She should not have been treating him like this, and yet could not bring herself to treat him any other way, either. Her face once again drew into a frown, and before she could stop herself, had already said, “This is the most words I’ve ever exchanged with a Vieran man,” giving herself a mental kick right after that had her frown deepening. Why share something like that with him? Why be so incredibly affected by his race?

…She missed her homeland, truly. That much she could never deny, and even if his voice suggested he was not Golmore born, he was yet a Viera. He was yet of the people she cared so much about, and clearly she was an idiot of the worst kind to have so little luck denying her emotions.

With a huff, her head angled back and her gaze went from him to the chandelier hanging from the ceiling, giving her frown to it instead of him. “But what about you?” she asked. “What had you at the wrong place at the wrong time, today?” To be caught up in their raid on a port town as he had… Rotten luck, no? If it wasn’t for her weakness for her people, he would have been in for a very bad time all around, both on the ship and in their destination.

But her misfortune was turning into his fortune, at least on some level. There was that curious comment about his captain to consider as well, but even without it, at least he had a chance to escape the slavery he would have been otherwise destined for.

[razorblade180]

Streamer au 3

Pt2 <-

Weiss:Hi chat. Glad to see some familiar names this late into the night. First things first, if you hear screaming in the distance, assume Ruby is playing Jump King.

“You should play Jump King.”

Weiss:You see I would, but I love myself. You all are already making me play something I don’t like; let’s not add more.

xxxx

Weiss:*focused* Huh? *pauses*

Yang: “Let me in the call you ninny”

Weiss:Don’t be fucking rude to me! *adds her*

Yang:Yooooo what we playin?

Weiss: “We” she says. It’s RE2 Remake.

Yang:Ah, so that’s why you invited me. How the hell did you get tricked into playing a horror game!?

Weiss:It was a stream goal! Just entertain chat.

Yang:Hey chat. What did I miss?

Velvet: “Mr. X made Weiss scream.”

Yang:Where’s the clip!?

Weiss:Who clipped that!? Chat I had trust in you!

xxxxx

Weiss: *deathly silent*

Yang:You’re so tense right now.

Weiss:I hate this game so much. Who makes a police station out of an old museum!?

Yang:Raccoon City. Are you allowing yourself to cheat?

Weiss:Cheat how?

Yang:I remember the pad locks.

Weiss:….If I run low on ammo, I will let you know.

Yang:Alrighty then. Your next horror game should be RE7 or Outlast.

Weiss:Never again. No money in the world will sway me. I’m not even making a goal.

Yang: Haha, Feline Fine with five dollars says “play a visual novel you coward.”

Weiss:Blake, if I don’t want to co-host you streaming one then I don’t want to play one! Also thanks for the five.

Cardin: “Why does an heiress need a stream goal? SMH”

Weiss: “Why does-” *pauses* Listen, okay? Everyone is about to learn something crazy. What if…a company’s money was primarily used to sustain said company? Perhaps, you know, I just can’t use it? Shocking I know.

Yang:Y’all are gonna make her rant.

Weiss:I won’t rant. It’s just crazy to me how people don’t ever think about that. It’s like when people think if I date them then they’re getting a steak dinner. No. You get home made tacos. I am not in charge of the company and we aren’t married. I barely have an allowance!

Ren: “Chicken or beef?”

Yang:Ren is asking the important questions here. It’s chicken by the way. Weiss is still rich enough to think ground beef is disgusting.

Weiss:*smirks* I just hate ground beef, shut up. Also grilled chicken is the only thing I’m good at. *unpauses*

Yang:She’s not lying. It’s sad.

Weiss:If you want steak dinners then go flirt with Coco.

[10 minutes later]

Coco: *donates 100$* “Get yourself a prime slice, Queen.”

Weiss:….Now I feel like I have to get a steak!

Yang:Unpopular opinion, well done steak is the best.

Weiss:You’re so lucky you’re modded.

xxxxxx

The dogs are let loose

Weiss:Fuck this game…

Yang:Hahahaha!

Blake:*hops in* Hello chat. Why is Neptune timed out?

Yang:Ada showed up for 5 seconds and said “thicc”

Blake:*restores him*

Weiss:Hey!

Blake:We don’t punish facts. Anyways, I’m surprised your boyfriend isn’t helping you through this but you got Yang to.

Yang:How dare you.

Weiss:I’d be streaming with face cam off.

Blake:Pumpkin Pete with three gift subs and says “I’m 1000% sure plenty know who he is.”

Weiss:Be that as it may…it’s his call. He can show up if he wants to. If he back seats then I’ll be pissed. All up to him.

Cardin: “Bet he’s fake”

Weiss:First you question my income, now my relationships!? Honestly that’s a worse take. I can get a date!

Fox:*hops in*

Weiss:…Fox?

Fox:Can you get a date if you only know how to make tacos?

Yang:Hahahaha!

Weiss:You jumped in to say that!?

Fox:*leaves*

Blake:Thank you Fox. Truly the best of us.

Weiss:I can’t with you guys.

Yang:I’m surprised nobody’s made a taco joke.

Weiss:Chat, listen to her and suffer consequences. Remember, she’s modded. You’re not.

Sun: “Weighing options”

Blake:Baby don’t do it. I can’t save you here.

Weiss:Now I’m hungry. This is your fault Yang. Buy me food.

Yang:Order that steak.

Weiss:I’m not throwing a hundred dollars at steak for a bit.

xxxxxx

Weiss:Yang, how the heck do I get past-Ah!

Ruby, a room away:FUCK! NO! *crying* WHHHHHYYYYY!

Weiss:*startled* That little- she scared me more than the game!

Yang:Is she still playing!?

Weiss:Hold on.

She takes off her headset and briskly walks out of her room.

Blake:Hehe, you know she’s ticked off when she’s walking fast.

Yang:I just assumed it’s because she’s short. I’m opening Ruby’s stream real quick.

Blake:Chat can hear it from here.

Yang:Oh but I want to see it!

Weiss:Take a break! It’s been two hours.

Ruby:I was so close Weiss! Just a little more!

Weiss:Get water, stretch, and take a break! You’re stressing me out. *pulling Ruby’s chair*

Ruby’s Chat: “Hiiiiii Weiss!!!!!”

Ruby:Don’t do this to me! Chat says hi by the way.

Weiss:Hi Ruby’s chat. She will be right back in like 8 minutes.

Ruby:Penny, Nora, entertain while I’m gone!

Nora:Okay so one time during lunch Ruby-

Ruby:No embarrassing stories!

xxxxx

YOU DIED

Weiss:*leans back in chair*

Yang:You know the Pale Heads and basically insta death right?

Weiss:You know that doesn’t mean I’m good at avoiding them right? I-eep!

Annoyed, she didn’t notice someone walking into her room from off screen and jolt the moment they get close. All chat sees is an hand give her mug of coffee then a very delicious looking sandwich as Weiss blushes. She tilts her camera down just enough that Jaune is able to kiss her out of view before leaving. Though it clear to chat she just kissed somebody.

Weiss:I love you. *readjust camera* Sup.

Yang:Gross.

Weiss:Shut your face. Bless him. I was about to order food.

Blake:You’re chat is scrolling too fast to read, holy crap. Chill guys.

Multiple people flood the chat with “who was that!?” Or a bunch of hearts.

Yang:Cardin should donate for being wrong and foolish.

Coco: “Agreed!!!”

Blake:Pay up! You heard to the woman.

Cardin: *donates 10$* “Only because you said chicken is better than beef”

Weiss:If that’s where we meet in the middle, I’ll take it.

Yang:Ground beef is still better.

Punsexual has been timed out for five minutes.

Yang:Petty.

Weiss:*sips coffee* Yep okay let’s get back to it.

Mr. X appears

Weiss:*pauses* I’m eating first

Blake:How brave of you…

[tomtenadia]

A Little Braver - ch. 5

So, here is ch. 5 for you all.

We finally get to meet the mysterious man that Aelin was kissing.

Also, the firehouse gets a great news

Enjoy it!

Ten days had passed. Aelin had been discharged from the hospital and allowed to move around in crutches providing she took it easy, a concept totally alien to her. She had gone back to the station as soon as she could do it.

The deadline for the performance review was fast approaching and she had spent the last few days at the station. They only got a week extension so she had offered to help but all she could do was sit and direct the show. Also, working kept her mind off… things… and as in things she meant a certain arsehole who had gone completely awol. She had texted him and never got a reply. Lately every time she tried to phone him she was told that the phone was not available. So she had stopped. He clearly was offended by what she had said. She just wished he had spoken to her, explained why her confession had terrified him so much. Just as she had finally found the resolve to try again after losing Sam, he had gone and ruined everything.

A glove hit her face “planet Earth calls Aelin.”

She refocused for a second and noticed Ansel’s red mane of hair in front of her.

“Dorian is looking for you. He is in your office and Aedion is there already.”

Aelin groaned “can they come to the couch? I am so comfy here.”

“Apparently not.”

“Fine.” She dropped the documents she was revising and grabbed her crutches and pulled herself up.

At snail pace she made her way to her office and once she got there she saw Aedion standing in front of her desk while Dorian had his feet up on it and was sitting relaxed on her comfortable chair.

“I don’t care if you are the chief. First, feet off my desk, second, arse off my chair.”

Dorian moved away and let her sit down and grabbed her crutches.

“So, what is so important that I had to leave my spot on the couch?”

Dorian passed her the documents he was holding, with a grin. He was positive this was going to cheer her up.

“No fucking way. You did it.”

He smiled at her smugly “Not entirely my merit.” He confessed “As you remember, the community protested in front of the government in the aftermath of the embankment accident. They did it just before the budget review was due. The government could not ignore them and what you all did that night. And I guess that the statement from your cheerleader had helped a lot as well.”

“Who?”

“Someone I am not allowed to mention in your presence.”

Aelin stare darkened all of a sudden.

“We are getting a second engine, but that engine needs staff.” She pointed out, her excitement taking a hit “I was just getting to that” added Dorian quite quickly, “Thomas has offered to give you a few men to help staff the second engine. It will have a mixed crew of newbies and experienced staff for a while. Aedion and I thought it was the best way to go.”

Aelin nodded “I want to help interview the candidates. Aedion is busy with drills. I, on the other hand, I have plenty of time.”

“As if I can sideline you. You are the captain after all.” Added Dorian knowing full well that if Aelin had her mind set on a task it was almost impossible to dissuade her.

“I want a bigger female presence. I can’t believe that from all the candidates that graduate from the academy there are no good female firefighters.”

“I can spread the news at the academy and see who applies and go from there.”

“Good.” Aelin relaxed on the chair.

“We have also have been invited to a party thrown by the mayor.”

“You are joking.” Aelin hated that kind of party. She had been to a few and it had been a nightmare.

“There is no escaping it. We have all the be present and dress mess is required.”

“My leg is in a protective support, if I wear dress mess I need to wear the skirt which means heels and can you see where I am going with this?” Aelin protested.

“I guess we can do an exception for you. Wear your regular blue trousers, make sure your boots are shining and wear your uniform shirt with the tie, not the t-shirt. And don’t forget the hat.”

“I can live with that.”

“When is the dreadful event?” Asked Aedion who hated those ceremonies just as much as Aelin.

“This Saturday.”

“We are on night shift, you genius.”

Dorian smiled dangerously “Not anymore. Second team is taking the night shift. Let me remind you that attendance is compulsory and pass the info to the team.”

“Yes, Chief.” And Aelin was very tempted to flip him off, but he was still her boss.

“Lys and Elide are to come as well. They are part of the team.”

“Oh so, no one is immune to this horrible shenanigans. Lovely.” Aelin sat back, still annoyed at the invitation.

“No darling, if I have to suffer, you will all go down with me.” And with that Dorian disappeared behind the door.

“Come on Aedion, let’s go and ruin the team’s day.”

Slowly the two made their way back in the common area where the squad was relaxing. Aedion had put them through a gruelling session of drills in the morning and now they needed time to unwind. No one had taken nicely the fact that the review has been postponed only by a week, but at least they hadn’t asked Aelin to attend as well with a destroyed knee. She would be there of course but on the sidelines.

“Ok, people,” Aelin shouted as she slowly made her way to her team “Brullo, switch off the tv for a minute.”

“That doesn’t sound promising,” complained Ren.

“Where are Lys and Elide?”

“In the ambulance doing inventory.” Replied Nox.

“Ok, can you please go and get them?” She asked him.

He nodded and ran away and got back a few moments later with the two ladies in tow.

“Ladies, sit.”

“Uh oh.” Said Lysandra, sitting on Aedion’s lap.

“Now that everyone is here, I have an announcement.” She smiled wickedly and the team shivered. That was her scary smile “Our esteemed mayor has decided to throw a party this Saturday. Bad news is… we are all invited so that he can show us how he appreciates what we do for the community.”

“Fuck no,” shouted Ansel, while finishing the bowl of cereals she was eating.

“We are on night shift.” Added Brullo.

“No we are not. Dorian gave the shift to second team. We are all free.”

A chorus of very rude words erupted from the team. Yeah, everyone hated those parties.

“Oh and by the way… it has to be dress mess.”

The protests grew louder. Aelin let them vent for a moment before putting an end to it.

“Guys!” She shouted, and the room went quiet “I know none of us like those parties, but my hands are tied. Dorian made it pretty clear that this is mandatory. So, protest how you want but there is no getting out of it.”

The team went back to their protest when Aelin raised her voice again “Did I say I was done?”

The group went silent again.

“The second piece of information is hopefully a bit more welcome.” And she really hoped so “we are getting our second engine.”

The cheers that erupted from the team were of pure joy.

“How did you do it?”

“You have to thank Dorian. He is the one who pulled the trick.” And Rowan apparently. No, she was not going there.

“He really is better than his old man. We have been pleading the old bastard for ages and nothing. A few months in charge and Dorian gives us the second engine. If it wasn’t that I am I straight I’d kiss the guy.” Said Ren happily and everyone laughed. 

Good, Aelin thought, they needed the good spirits.

“How will we do for crew?” Asked Ansel.

“Thomas is willing to give us some of his experienced men from one of his engines and take a few newbies. We’ll man the engine with a hybrid crew. Half experienced and half newbies. I need everyone to help with training. Aedion and I will do the main stuff but you guys are involved in this as well. I am out of commission for a while so I can only do classroom training.”

“We’ll help you, cap.” Chimed Nox happily.

Aelin turned to Ansel “I have asked to have a few more ladies in the team.”

“Thanks for that. Far too much testosterone in here.”

Aelin sat back down on the sofa, her knee started to get sore again “We are going to have other women hopefully, just don’t break their hearts.” She told Ansel.

Two of the guys sprayed what they were drinking, Aelin laughed “Oh come on, don’t tell me you had no idea Ansel was swinging on both sides.” Joked Aelin smiling at the woman.

“Both…” asked Brullo still quite shocked.

Ansel drank her coffee very calmly “Men, women, on a few occasion both at the same time.”

Aelin laughed at the expression of the guys.

“Ansel, I think you broke our boys.”

Aelin mobile went off and for a moment she hoped. But that hope had been short lived.

“Give me two minutes,” she said at the person at the phone. She stood and very slowly she made her way back to her office.

Once she got off the phone she stayed in her office to work. Then the dispatch siren went off and she heard the team depart and staying behind broke her heart.

She worked a bit longer but her mind could never fully concentrate. So she decided to do something stupid while the team was out on a call. She booked a taxi and not long after she was in front of the station waiting for her ride.

The driver got her at the airbase pretty quickly. She took out her pass and she hoped it worked even without him about. The man at the main gate let her through after checking her badge. So apparently he had told people she was allowed on the premises. That was a start. Painfully she reached the second check point and a guard approached her. Ok, her luck had already ran out.

“Can I help you, miss?”

“Yes, I am here to see captain Whitethorn.”

The man looked at her with curiosity for a second.

Did she got to the right airbase? As far as she knew there was only one and the first guy let her in.

“I am sorry miss but the captain and his team left a week ago.”

“Left?” Her voice trembled.

“Yes ma’am. They have been recalled and deployed a week ago.”

“Oh.” Was all Aelin managed “Th— thank you.” She turned and made her way back to the exit. Her heart slowly breaking. She sat down on a cement wall and let the sobs come. She took the phone and dialled his number and it went to voicemail “You could have told me. Instead you left. You just left me. Do you really hate me that much?” She sobbed and brushed her hand against her eyes “I hate you and I wish I never met you. Don’t ever bother look for me when you come back… I don’t want to see your face anywhere near my station. I am done with you, captain.” She hung up the phone and lowered her head and kept crying. She was done with men. She was done with pain and a broken heart. It was not worth it.

Eventually she pulled herself upright again and started walking. She had no idea to where, which she then realised that with crutches was a really bad idea. She had to stop a few times, exhaustion taking root. But the pain in her leg was keeping away the pain in her soul. It was much later when she realised she ended up in the west of Orynth and decided to go to west station, perhaps she could bribe the guys to give her a lift back to her firehouse.

Once outside the station, Thomas was the first one who noticed her. He ran to her and Aelin collapsed in his arm.

“Aelin, what are you doing here?’

“I need to sit” was all she managed. He lifted her in his arms and carried her to the section with all the bunk beds. He placed the crutches on the floor and sat on the bed at her side.

“What happened?” He asked when he noticed her puffy eyes “Why are you over here? On your own?”

“I was at the airbase.”

Thomas looked at her in shock “are you telling me that you walked in your condition from the airbase to here?”

Aelin nodded. “Can you give me a lift back?”

“Of course,” he patted her leg “let me go and tell the guys.”

He came back not long after, and lifted her in his arms “Let’s go.”

Once in the car Aelin relaxed and leaned her head against the window.

“Excited about the big night with the Mayor?”

Aelin groaned and Thomas laughed.

“Exactly the reaction my whole team had as well.”

She sighed “Dorian said it’s mandatory and I think for the very first time I have been this close to hit him. But he still is my superior.”

Thomas chuckled “If there is someone who can hit the chief without repercussions is you.”

Aelin turned and looked at him with a questioning stare.

“I mean because you are close. It’s not news that the man is madly in love with you. He might let you off if you beat him. Actually he might even like it.”

This time it was Aelin’s turn to laugh “Dorian and I… nothing ever happened. We are just really good friends. Not even a kiss.”

“So now the news is that you have your eyes set on a certain airforce captain.”

Aelin tensed at those words “You all are a bunch of crazy gossiper, you know that?”

Thomas shrugged “What did he do?”

“I don’t want to talk about him.” Her tone hard and the man at her side realised it was time to shut up. They were at her station anyway.

Aelin noticed the engine was back and she knew she was in trouble. They clearly had noticed her absence. When she decided to look at her phone again she saw a lot of message and missed phone calls from Aedion. Damn, she was screwed.

“Here you are, my lady.”

Aelin leaned over and kissed him on the cheek “thank you so much for the ride.”

“Anytime.” He opened his mouth as if to speak, then stopped and tried again “if you need to talk, I am here. I know you have your friends, but if you prefer to talk with someone who is not around you all day, I am here.”

“You are wonderful.”

He helped her get out of the car, they said goodbye and he drove away again.

Aedion came marching on as soon as he noticed she was back “where the hell have you been? Why don’t you answer your bloody phone? We came back and you were not here, where you were supposed to be.” She felt bad for making them all worry but she did not feel like explaining herself so she just moved past him and in silence she dragged herself to her office and slammed the door shut.

She sat down at her desk and plopped her leg on the spare chair the guys had placed at her side so she could stretch her injured leg, hoping for the pain to subside. She took a few minutes for herself, then texted Lysandra telling her she needed her and Elide.

The two women arrived a few minutes later. They sat on the chair in front of her desk and Aelin knew that Lys was just as mad as Aedion had been.

“Where were you? We came back and you were gone.”

“I went to the airbase.” She confessed, looking outside the window, the sky looked heavy grey and she was positive snow was coming.

“As in the airbase. His airbase.”

Aelin nodded “I needed answers. I needed to know why he left that way. I had to ask him why all this hate.”

“And?”

Aelin felt tears sting her eyes again “he was gone.” She paused “the whole team has been recalled and left for a mission a week ago. No goodbyes. Nothing. He just took off.”

Lysandra stood and ran to hug her friend “what an arsehole.”

Aelin started sobbing again “all I could do was leave him an angry voicemail telling to get away from me forever.”

“I am seriously going to kick his arse.”

Aelin pulled back from the hug “Not worth it remember?”

“We all go to that stupid party and we’ll find you a man there. Perhaps a hot wealthy man.”

Aelin chuckled “You know what, screw it. I’ll remain single all my life and if I want a good time I might ask Ansel.”

The two women laughed “she might take you up on that, you know, right?” Added Lysandra.

“Can we just stop talking about it? Fine he is hot but is he not a nice man. I want to forget that I even contemplated the fact that I had feelings for the bastard.”

“Copy that. I will pass the message along.”

“Have you considered that he might not be able to reply to you because of where he is? Perhaps he is on an aircraft carrier in the middle of the sea.”

Lysandra and Aelin stared at Elide.

“What?” She said shrugging “Lorcan gave me his number, he told me to text him. But he added as well that in the case he was going to leave for a mission not to worry if he did not reply because sometimes their phones don’t work.”

“So you knew they were away?”

“No,” replied the woman lifting her hands “I haven’t heard from him in a while. He is not the greatest of texter and I haven’t spoken to him in a while. I had no idea he was away until now when you told us.”

“Basically airforce boys do not know how to communicate. Got it.” Sarcasm dripping from Aelin’s voice.

Aelin shifted uncomfortably in her chair and Lysandra noticed that.

“Are you okay.”

“Just my leg, bothering me like hell today.”

“Sure, if you only just didn’t walk from the airbase to west station…”

Dispatch alarm went off and the two ladies ran out as the ambulance was needed.

Aelin tried going back to work but her brain was not there.

Out of boredom and curiosity and probably a deep desire for punishment she looked up the captain online. The search engine brought up a page about him. He was only two years older than her. Native of Wendlyn but moved to Terrasen when he was quite young for his father’s job. According to the article he climbed the ranks quite quickly and was thought to be one of the most promising captain in the TAF in a very long time.

“Nerd.” She joked.

Then she scrolled down to personal life and she got even more curious but froze when she read the paragraph.

Fuck.

The man had been married. His pregnant wife had died in a car accident over a year and a half before. She opened the link to the newspaper article about the accident and noticed the picture of the accident site. Her eyes fell on one detail of the image and swore.

She stood and wobbling she went to the file cabinet where she kept the reports for the old cases. She found the one she needed and sat back down. Lyria Whitethorn, that was the name of the woman. She had a look through the case file. She did remember it. It had snowed heavily and the road and had been icy and pretty bad in some areas of town. That accident had been horrendous and it had involved quite a few cars. Lyria’s car had been stuck under a lorry. According to the police it seemed like it had lost control and smashed under the lorry that had crashed against the barriers at the side of the road. She died on impact. It had been an horrendous night. They spent hours working under the snow and only one person had come out alive from that disaster.

She leaned back and felt tears running down her face. They had one big thing in common. They both had lost someone they loved. And all of a sudden it hit her. His reaction. His fear. And for a moment contemplated that he was just as scared as her to get involved again. She closed the file and  grabbed her head in her hands. How badly had she fucked up? 

She took her phone and dialled his number. The number was not available and she left him a voicemail message again “Hey it’s me again. I know you are away and probably can’t get this message. If you listen to the old one as well, just ignore it. I was mad. I did not mean it. I… just… let’s just talk when you get back. Please. Be safe, okay?”

She leaned back in her chair, closed her eyes and cried for both of them, for what they had lost and for the fear of committing again. 

Saturday eventually arrived and Aelin was at home getting ready for the party. Lysandra and Elide had joined her since Lys was going to drive them all.

Aelin had been in a bad mood since her discovery about Rowan but had not told anyone about it. To do so would mean reveal his secret and she could not to do that. It was far too personal.

“You’d think that being barely able to walk would excuse me from such horrible events.” She growled while tying her tie.

“You have been in a funk for a few days. Are you okay?” Lysandra had noticed her bad mood.

“Fine.” She snapped. “I am sorry…”

“Just don’t piss off any politicians, okay? We need them.”

Aelin sighed “I will behave.”

They arrived at the venue not long after and they noticed the already high number of cars present.

“Are we too late to bail?” Asked Elide who had been uncomfortable as well at the idea.

“Unless you want Dorian to rip you a new one, I would leave aside that plan for now.”

The three women made their way to the main entrance where someone checked their names against a list. Aelin for a moment hoped that someone had messed up and forgot to add them.

But that hope died quickly when the man greeted them a bit too happily.

“Ok, are we ready?” Said Aelin gathering the courage she needed to face such a horrible night.

They entered the venue and the notes of classical music hit them.

“At least they have great taste in music.” Commented Aelin staring at the great hall.

Dorian spotted them from the distance and walked to them with a brisk pace “Ladies, you made it. wonderful. Go, mingle, have fun. There’s plenty of food.” He grabbed Aelin’s hand “You come with me. The mayor wants to meet you.”

“What?” Blurted Aelin, sweating cold all of a sudden.

“The mayor would like to speak with you. He met Thomas already. Now it’s your turn.”

“I am not speaking to the mayor.”

“Aelin… this is an order from your superior.”

The woman growled back “Oh, so pulling rank, now?”

“Come,” he repeated.

Aelin turned to Lysandra and Elide “if I don’t come back soon, please come and get me. I love you both.”

Dorian rolled his eyes and he started walking and Aelin followed behind.

Eventually they arrived where the mayor was entertaining some guest and Aelin wanted to turn away, but Dorian sensed her intentions and placed a hand on her lower back in warning.

“Ah, Dorian, I see you have captain Galathynius with you. Wonderful.”

Aelin leaned on one crutch and extended her hand to the man “please to meet you sir.”

“The honour is mine captain. And thank you for coming even in your conditions.”

As if I had a choice and she looked at Dorian glaring at him.

“I just wanted to offer my thank you in person for what you do in the community and what you did the night of the embankment accident.”

“The community comes first.” She commented and Dorian gently nudged her sides at her comment.

“You are absolutely correct, captain. I am aware that you will be getting a second engine at east station, I hope this is a welcomed news.”

Aelin smiled “Very much sir. It has been a long time coming and we are very excited.”

“This is my email,” he gave her a business card “email me. Any idea, concerns or anything else related to your job. I will do my best to make it happen.”

Aelin took the card and was speechless. 

“Now unfortunately being the host forces me to go around and be pleasant with all these strangers. I don’t think there is alcohol enough to survive such an evening.”

He gave her a huge grin, waved at Dorian and walked away.

“Are we sure that was the mayor?”

Dorian nodded dumbfounded.

“Do you think he was drunk?”

Dorian shrugged, just as confused as her “Just don’t loose that card.” The man then left her and she had a moment alone to look around and enjoy the music. She hadn’t been at a classical concert in a lifetime and missed it. Or at the opera. She wanted to go to the opera again.

She had her eyes closed when she perceived a figure at her side. She opened her eyes again and noticed it was Thomas, looking at her in a curious way “Hey you.”

She looked at him and froze. The man in front of her was gorgeous. She was used to see him in his everyday uniform or the fire gear, and his hair tied and under an helmet. She almost did not recognise him. He had his dress mess uniform on, and his hair was free and she discovered it reached his shoulders. 

“I almost did not recognise you there.”

He grinned “I know, without soot and dirt on me it must be a challenge.”

She smiled back at him.

“How is your night going?” He asked, moving closer to her.

“Counting the minutes until Dorian tells me it’s okay to go home.”

She shuffled in her position and he placed a hand on her back “you should sit down.”

“Does this place have a balcony?”

Thomas grinned “Follow me, m’lady.”

“Did you meet the mayor?” She asked as they started walking.

“I did.”

“And?”

“He gave me his business card and told me to tell me if there was anything we needed.” He made his way through the crowd.

“Me too. I am going to email him and ask a bucket load of expensive equipment.”

“I have my wish-list ready.” Thomas commented smiling wickedly.

They arrived at the balcony and once there Aelin leaned heavily against the wall.

“Are you okay?” Suddenly Aelin noticed their proximity. Thomas was right in front of her.

“I am fine.”

“Want something to drink?”

“Please. Wine if they have it.”

He smiled and she noticed his dimples appear “I’ll be right back.” And she felt her face flush hot.

What was happening to her? Why all of a sudden she was attracted to him?

She saw Lys walking by and waved at her.

“What are doing here?”

“Hiding.” She said hurriedly “I have a problem.”

“What did you do?”

“I want to do something stupid.”

“As in?”

“Thomas.” She explained.

Lysandra looked at her friend with a puzzled face.

“As in he is the one one I want to … do”

“Holy fuck,” she exclaimed almost spilling all her wine on her uniform.

“How?”

Aelin looked up “I don’t know. He was here, he was nice, he smiled and I just… have you seen him tonight?”

“No I was with Aedion and the guys.”

“I don’t know what to do.”

“Don’t do… anything.” Then she moved away “he is coming back.”

Thomas came back with the drinks and placed them on the ledge beside them.

She had known and worked with the other captain for a very long time. They had gone through the academy together. And never, not once she had ever felt a smidge of attraction for him.

He leaned against the wall just beside her, shoulders brushing gently “is your team ready for the performance review?”

Aelin nodded “Yes, Aedion and I are going through as many different scenarios as possible. They are ready. But I hate that I will have to stare from the sidelines.” She told him “How did yours go?”

Thomas drank some wine “We had a few bad moments. My newbie fucked up a couple of things and threw the whole team off track for a moment but they did recover splendidly. Manon was the best in our individual challenge.”

“Ohh I like her. Can I please get her and Asterin for my new engine?”

“We’ll see.” The man gave her a wide smile that made his dimples come back.

She pinched his side and he grabbed her hands to block her. She stopped and stared at him for a moment and then they both moved at the same time. Their lips met and he pushed her against the wall and she left her crutches fall on the ground. His hand behind her back to hold her up. The kiss deepened and Aelin opened for him and a small moan escaped her.

“Oh shit.” Said a voice at her side and Aelin recognised Lysandra and Aedion at her side.

She and Thomas broke apart quickly. Thomas coughed embarrassed, looked at Aelin and excused himself.

“What the fuck was that?”

Aelin’s hand went to her mouth, her lips still swollen by the kiss.

Aedion kneeled to pick up her crutches and passed them to her.

In that instant the rest of the team arrived.

“Why is everyone out here? It’s cold.”

“Aedion and I just discovered Aelin making out with Thomas.”

“Do you mean captain Hamilton?” Asked Brullo.

“I thought you liked the silver haired fox.” Added Ansel.

“Are you and Thomas a thing now?” This time it was Ren.

“I don’t know okay?” Aelin shouted, frustration rising “It happened.”

“You… happened to trip on his lips?” Nox gave her a smug smile and Aelin would have stormed out if she hadn’t been on crutches.

Aelin placed the glass back on the ledge and started to walk away. Lysandra caught up with her “I am sorry. It just came out.”

“Lys, I don’t care.”

The woman grabbed her arm “Aelin, please…”

“What? I don’t know what I was doing okay? We kissed. And I don’t understand my feelings anymore.” She leaned against the wall, her knee throbbing with pain “I haven’t known my feelings since Sam died.” She sniffled “I work. I throw myself into work because that it’s when I do not think that he is gone from my life.” She closed her eyes and tried to put all her pain back “it just felt nice for a moment to have that again. And I know I am sounding like a pathetic mess… I don’t know why I did it.” Aelin sobbed “I am so tired of hurting.” A tear appeared at the corner of her eyes “you have Aedion. I don’t have anyone.”

Lysandra hugged her friend “I am so sorry.”

Aelin leaned into her friend “we are fine.” She pulled back “but I am going home. I am in a ton of pain and I really want to lie down.”

“I’ll tell Dorian if he starts looking for you.”

“We are off tomorrow. Fancy a girls day? We can invite Elide and Ansel.”

“Yeah. Yeah, please.”

“Good,” Lys patted her shoulder “now go home and relax.”

She was outside ready to call a taxi when she heard a voice calling her. She turned and saw Thomas running to her.

“Aelin,” he stopped in front of her “I am sorry. I have no idea what got into me. I was there and all of a sudden I wanted to kiss you.”

She turned to him and moved closer enough to kiss him. His hand slipped to her waist and pulled her closer. She melted in his arms and felt his hand caressing her back.

“I was going home.” She said against his lips.

“I can’t let you piss off Havilliard on your own.”

She kissed him again and then detached so he could call a taxi.

Their ride home arrived not long after and the journey to Aelin’s flat was not too long. 

They made it to her flat and he lifted her in his arms and walked to the bedroom. He dropped her on the bed and leaned on top of her and kissed her deeply, his hands trailing on the sides of her body and Aelin leaned into the touch. Her hand trailed up to his face and then fisted into his golden hair and pulled him down for another kiss. Maybe it was a mistake but she could not care.

Slowly he started to unbutton her shirt and Aelin did the same for him and not long after they were both naked and Aelin stared at his body and realised the man was so incredibly well built. 

“You will have to lead the dances, captain.” He lowered himself again over her and kissed her in a way that made her forget all the pain and hurt.

It was later, after their adventure in bed. 

Aelin smiled at him satisfied. The man had skills and for a while he made her forget the real reason why that night she had searched for comfort in him.

They were now sitting in bed, their back against the headboard and the blanket covering them up.

“Did we just mess up our friendship?” He asked turning to her “I am not complaining I just…”

She sighed at his side “I think we did it for the wrong reasons.”

He agreed “Epically awesome rebound sex?”

Aelin nodded and Thomas turned to her “you are stunning though, and if the captain can’t see it, well, it’s his loss.”

“You are a sweet man” and she caressed his face “and your ex is a bitch.” She grabbed his arm and pulled him down, “fancy watching stupid movies? We can also order in. There’s a place round the corner that stays open till late. I had no food at that stupid party.”

“I’ll get the beers.” He said getting off the bed and putting his briefs back on. 

Aelin grabbed a discarded t-shirt “I’ll order the food.”

He came back with the beers and offered one to her “to our own party.”

They clinked the bottles and went to camp on the sofa.

TAGs: 

@rowaelinismyotp

@swankii-art-teacher​

@courtofjurdan

[aclamclriver]

definitive ranking of who you’ll catch under the mistletoe:

kylo ren:  2/10     ( if you do it’ll be by accident.  he’s gonna be a real ass about it too.  do not try and do a meet cute because he  will  rip the mistletoe away and he  will  be rude about it.  however,  if you accidentally meet him under the mistletoe at the right time,  and you’re all alone,  get ready for that man to either  a)  kiss you so sweet and soft,  or  b)  pin you to a wall and kiss you speechless. )

clyde logan:  7/10   ( wants to catch you under the mistletoe,  but is also pretty shy about it.  will consent to cheek kisses if people are around.  blushes hard.  he’ll shake his head and smile at you if you connive to get him.  you won’t think he’d return the favour,  but maybe there’s a sprig where you don’t expect,  or a decided structure to clyde meeting you somewhere.  his full kiss will be soft,  and gentle,  and warm. )

flip zimmerman:  7/10   ( rolls his eyes at mistletoe shenanigans,  and pretends he’s above it all,  but if you’re under a sprig,  he’ll be on his feet fast as lightning.  lots of deep kisses.  if there’s a crowd,  he might dip you dramatically and kiss you stupid.  expect a smirk and a wink. )

father garupe:   1/10   ( he’ll lecture you about pagan traditions every time he sees mistletoe.  do not attempt.  he’ll think about kissing you,  though. )

philip altman:  10/10   ( can and will kiss you under every sprig of mistletoe.  very cocky about it.  doesn’t see it as a tradition so much as a chance to sweep you off your feet a bit.  puts on a show.  grabs your ass. )

paul sevier:  6/10   ( gets nervous about kissing you in public,  but he’ll lean over to kiss your cheek,  and the smile on his face is both warm,  and  very  inviting. )

ben solo:  6/10   ( listen,  he’s going thru some things.  dealing with some stuff.  daddy problems.  will not take the hint,  or will ignore the hint.  you gotta let him come to you,  and let him whisper in your ear everything he wants to do to you after he kisses you. )

paterson:  7/10   ( good natured about it.  will give you a peck or cheek kiss in public.  likes to kiss you at home and then slow dance with you in the light of the christmas tree.  loses points only because he thinks he doesn’t need an excuse to love you. )

adam sackler:  7/10   ( cannot make up his mind on it.  has insisted it’s a dumb weird tradition most of his life,  will also grind up against you while you kiss if you two are the ones under the mistletoe.  loses points because you can’t fuck in public adam. )

matt the radar technician:  5/10   ( can’t handle the pressure.  way too nervous,  overthinks it,  or yells at everyone watching.  better when you’re alone,  but he still kind of nervous babbles.  it’s okay baby take ur time. )

jude:  7/10   ( indulges you on it.  thinks it’s kind of a silly tradition,  but he goes with the flow. )

parnassus:  3/10   ( he will not stop at a kiss,  and by court order,  you aren’t allowed in the mall together anymore. )

pale:  8/10   ( that man will kiss you like you’re lovers being separated by time,  space,  and fate.  he’ll also ruin the moment with a quip.  sometimes you just wanna enjoy the moment. )

toby:  4/10   ( we’re gonna have to face facts here.  toby is a good kisser.  a  great  kisser.  toby knows how to get you around town and back.  toby is also a giant sleaze and you might be wiping grease off your lips.  worth it?  perhaps. )

charlie:  9/10   ( i hate the d*ddy kink so much but that man exudes Dad Energy,  and he’d kiss you like he wants another kid.  loses points because the divorce after doesn’t seem fun. )

daniel:  1000/10:   ( i don’t have logic for this.  the suit ruined me.  the suit and hair combo.  i need to lie down. )

[recentanimenews]

Komi Can’t Communicate S2 – 04 – The Kings of Christmas

It’s Christmas Eve, and Komi has been informed by Najimi that she’s going to host a party (nearly) everyone is attending. Komi races to the mall with her similarly barely verbal little brother Shousuke (though we learn after the credits he simply chooses to rarely speak). Komi in Big Sis Mode is a welcome and rare treat, and even though Shousuke acts like this is all a big hassle, even he isn’t immune to her austere expressions of pure joy.

When the gang arrives—along with several tertiary classmates whose names I’ve yet to remember—they greet Komi with a Merry Christmas and a Happy Birthday…though her birthday is actually the 26th. Oddly, both Tadano and Ren made the same mistake despite acquiring their information from vastly different means.

The enormous group means there’s potential for a lot of back and forth, and back and forth there is, but it all feels a bit…scattered? Leaving aside the fact I’m not 100% sure Komi actually ever agreed to host the party and was given less than 24 hours to prepare which seems rude considering how many people came. That said, the group does pick out the perfect gift for Komi: a giant plush black kitty she later uses as a body pillow.

Another point against this episode is that for a show with such a large cast there is simply too much screen time for Ren, whom it’s already been established is an unrepentant pervert who should be in juvenile detention. I know this show embraces a stylized form of reality where every character’s personality tics are amplified, but her schtick in particular feels outdated and icky.

If it sounds like I hated this episode…that’s not quite it. It’s just that it bothered me that Tadano totally chickened out on spending time with just Komi over winter break because he assumed, without evidence, she was…sigh…”just being nice.” Dude: first of all, she’s always nice; second, she definitely wants to hang out with you one-on-one! I’m sure having all her friends under her roof for Chrismas was super fun for Komi, but I can’t help but feel a part of her also felt…disappointed.

Also, not to bury the lede here…but where the f*** is one of Komi’s newest friends, Katai Makoto? Whether he couldn’t come or no one invited him, his absence, combined with the fact this is a Christmas episode in May, makes it feel like the episodes are airing out of chronological order, with this one taking place before Katai joined the cast. In any case, the episode ends on a sweet note with Komi making sure everyone understands her feelings. If only Tadano would grow a pair and try to do the same!

By: sesameacrylic

[devilbrakers]

🎂🌋📣 for dem, 📸🎭 🎁 for indigo,📏 ☄️💚 for hakon, pweaseeee<3

Demetria:

🎂 BIRTHDAY CAKE - when is their birthday? do they like celebrating it?

The 27th of Sun’s Height 2E 556! She lost her love for celebrating as the years went on, so I wouldn’t say she really enjoys it anymore. She does appreciate people remembering it though or getting her gifts. Just doesn’t like to make a big deal of it anymore. When she was younger, she liked to throw small parties, only inviting a select few people though often she was inviting very busy people (ex. Vanus) so they often couldn’t come but would send their regards. In the cave, she spent her birthdays with family though they didn’t do anything too extravagant due to not having a lot of money.

🌋 VOLCANO - how bad is their temper? is it a slow boil, or a instant explosion?

Hmmm. She’s easily irritated by the little things but it’s not explosive anger by any means, she does her best to not take it out on other people. She’s relatively mild-mannered. The only time she’ll blow up at people is when she’s already going through something really stressful and they do something to piss her off. She’ll apologize eventually though. 

📣 MEGAPHONE - how loud are they? what do they speak like? got a voice claim?

She’s not very loud most of the time but her voice demands attention when she raises it. Her voice carries well and she’s well-spoken, not very high or low pitched, kinda a medium voice, I’d say? Emily Blunt is the closest I have to a voice claim though Dem’s accent is a bit thicker. It’s pretty pleasant to listen to overall. 

Indigo:

📸 CAMERA - do they enjoy having their picture taken? what's their go-to pose? do they like taking photos? what do they take photos of?

He doesn’t mind for the most part especially if you’re at least a decent photographer. He likes when people take pictures of him without him knowing because they seem more authentic that way. He’s also pretty photogenic regardless of the state of his physical health. He takes photos pretty often when he’s with friends. It helps him recall memories since he has a hard time with that sometimes. He has a lot of polaroids of his friends and a few of Ren. 

🎭 MASKS - do they act differently around certain people? what's different between the way they act around friends, family, strangers, etc.?

Indigo lacks a strong sense of identity, so he’s very malleable in that way. He doesn’t know how to describe himself so he’s likely to believe whatever someone has to say about him if it’s not too outlandish. Not to say he doesn’t have a personality because he has a very strong one, but he’s prone to masking because he knows he can be over-bearing and rude without meaning to be. It hasn’t always been in his nature to be mean, believe it or not. He’s kinder to friends and his siblings and protective, standoffish and quiet around strangers, and venomous to people like Zeke and Vincent. If he doesn’t like you, he’ll quickly find which buttons to push that piss you off the most, so he can be nearly unbearable to be around. 

🎁 PRESENT - what types of presents would they be most happy to receive? are they good at gift giving?

He gets uncomfortable when people gift him things, though that’s not to say he’s ungrateful because that’s far from the truth, he just can’t fathom that people think about him when he’s not around. He’ll keep whatever someone gives him forever though regardless if they’re still friends further down the line. 

He’s not bad at gift giving, he likes to give people little things that made him think of them. So it’s not likely to ever be something particularly extravagant. 

Hakon:

📏 RULER - is your oc well educated? where did they get their learning from?

He’s not well educated academically and that’s a big point of insecurity for him. He is very intelligent though. He’s similar to Kaidan in the regard of being well-spoken and educated on history and politics. He’s very progressive. He’s just not very well-read or well-versed in anything scientific. He’s very knowledgeable about magic, combat, and anything survival-based. He’s also pretty emotionally intelligent. 

☄️ COMET - what do people assume about them? are they right?

He looks intimidating due to his stature and general build. Beyond that people tend to think he’s very sweet but a bit dense. They’re right about the former; he’s a sweetheart but he’s not dense, no. He’s quite observant, just not terribly talkative most days. 

💚 GREEN HEART - what things make your oc feel comforted? hugs, kisses, food?

He really likes having his face cradled :’). Pepper a few kisses across his face while holding him gently and he’ll forget all his troubles for a little bit. He also really enjoys when people play with his hair. He likes when people make him food because when he’s on the road, and he is a lot, hot meals can be few and far between and he likes to eat. 

[star-killer-md]

Dream a Little Dream of Me Pt. 8

Well folks I have returned after a long break. I was hit with a wave of no motivation and life shit but thank you to everyone who has read all my other shit and left me such nice feedback. I am patently horrible at responding to comments but I see them all and love them so much. There is not much Kylo in this chapter, so apologies in advance but I promise there will be plenty of him to come. 

AO3 Mirror

Part 9 to come

Warnings: Angst, angst and more angst, not much else except for that so buckle up. 

Summary: In which you discover sometimes knowing is worse. 

Ship: Kylo Ren x Negotiator!Reader

Word Count: 6.4k

Your breathing stopped along with the footsteps at the door. One hand remained pressed firmly against your mouth while you shrunk as far under the desk as possible. There was only horrid stillness for the next few moments. You got the distinct impression that whoever stood at the entryway was tasting the very air, sniffing like a predator for blood spilled into the sea. And a chill ran through you the second he caught your scent. A voice like ice and stone rang out as the hunt began in earnest. 

“You know, it’s impolite to enter a room without permission,” Atreus mused from behind you. 

The sound of it coupled with the knowledge that he was only mere footsteps away made your limbs shake. Like a wild creature caught in a snare, you were flooded with instinctual fear at the sound of the door clicking shut. 

“Though I will admit, I was hoping you would pay me a visit.” 

He was pacing now, footsteps softened by the carpet but still perceptible. To your right the embellished wardrobe doors were flung open accompanied by a dissatisfied grunt. You frantically searched the immediate area for paths of escape—or potential weapons if it came to that—but there was nothing. Your back was to the door and Atreus stood directly between you and the only way out. 

As the likelihood that you would walk out of this office dwindled, you cursed yourself and your hubris for ever taking this job in the first place. 

There must have been a saying about this type of thing somewhere, but you couldn’t seem to recall any at the moment. 

“You ought to show yourself,” he continued, every word laced with mockery and disgust. 

He was getting closer with each step. There were only so many places to hide and judging by the fading noises of clutter being moved, all but one had been exhausted. He was going to find you and you were going to die. 

At least you would be right about one thing. 

Kylo Ren really was a liar. 

 “I never took you for a coward,” fingers drummed on the desk above you and it creaked as Atreus leaned his weight over the top, like a ship's hull as it kicked into hyperdrive. 

He was so close now you could smell him, all artificial cologne and shoe polish. If you hadn’t been trying so hard to hold your breath before you certainly were now. His own came in calm, measured puffs and you closed your eyes tightly as if that could hide you any further. While your last moments alive and breathing wasted away, you recalled all the times the Commander had called you arrogant or prideful or any other combination of synonyms that all meant the same damn thing: foolish. 

Before you might have called it confidence. Might have thought he and all your other superiors were simply threatened by their inability to tear you down. Now you just kicked yourself for being cocky enough to leave your back turned. 

“Seems I was mistaken, Ren.” 

What? 

You recoiled at the name and very nearly said the word aloud as your eyes flew open in shock.  But the legs which came into view—unnervingly long and thin— and situated directly in front of the desk turned anything you might say to dust on your tongue.    

Why was it, even at the moment of your imminent demise, that the Commander was inevitably mentioned? 

Could you really not be executed for political gain in peace?

“I know you’re here. I can feel it,” he began but was interrupted by two more approaching footsteps and a blessedly familiar voice. 

“No, I’m sorry sir, I’ve been away sampling catering options,” Lem’s soft, clear tone was more relieving that you’d care to admit. 

You swore if you lived through the next five minutes, you’d apologize for every rude thing you’d ever said to him. 

Well, all the rude things you’d been wrong about. 

“You were in your office just before I left,” Gahl grumbled and stopped just outside the door, wrapping twice. “Atreus, are you quite finished in there? I’d rather not be late to dinner just because you’ve stained your tie.” 

The creak of hinges nearly had you slamming your head into the desk in shock. 

“No sir, I lent the space to our guest from the First Order,” Lem prattled nervously and you heard Atreus growl as he shifted in place. 

“You shouldn’t be letting just anyone wander around here, Alba,” the advisor huffed before adding under his breath, “You never know what they might get into.” 

“Really, you’re the one that suggested we invite—” Lem was drowned out by another soft knock and the creaking of a door across the hall. 

You didn’t bother tuning into what Gahl had been mumbling about as Atreus’s knees slowly bent and you were once again filled with the rush of dread at the prospect of being discovered. At best you’d be labeled as a conspirator and sent back to the Finalizer for Hux to have you killed himself for destroying Order relations to Coruscant. At worst, you were destined to die on the goddamn floor at the feet of a greasy, poor excuse for an advisor. 

But in fact, neither of those options played out. 

Instead, you found the world going black for just a split second—no more than a blink—and when you woke it was to a hand gently rocking your shoulder. 

You bolted upright, startled to find yourself no longer cramped on the floor, but seated in Lem’s office. There was a small puddle of drool on the desk and Lem himself staring down at you, brows knit in concern. 

“You alright?” he asked quietly. 

But you didn’t respond right away, just looked wide-eyed out the door as Atreus rose from the floor and met your gaze with his own indecipherable expression. 

From beside you, Lem squeezed your shoulder again and you turned to face him. 

“Yes, sorry,” you muttered, shrugging away from him and rolling your neck. Every joint and muscle in you felt stiff. “I must have dozed off a bit.” 

“I can see that,” he chuckled but his face never lost it’s questioning look. 

“Right, well,” you continued, hastily gathering your things.  The air felt thick and stuck in your throat. You wanted to get out—needed to get out—immediately. “Thank you for the office, I’ll be on my way and send the drafts to you later this evening.” 

Passing by Gahl at the doorway, you gave him a friendly nod and a quiet, “Representative, I hope you have a lovely evening.” 

You were nearly out of the wing entirely when that god awful voice sunk it’s claws into your leg again. 

“Oh, but you must join us for dinner,” Atreus hummed. 

He had sauntered back out to stand behind the Representative and was pinning you down with a horrifically sweet smile. It was so wrong on his face you shuddered at the sight. Gahl, annoyingly, nodded along as he looked you up and down. 

“A good suggestion,” he said heartily. The redness of his cheeks and the slight sway in his step suggested he’d had more than just one drink before returning. “We haven’t had the chance to speak much since you came.” 

Shit. That bastard knew you couldn’t refuse a personal invitation lest you run the risk of seeming rude or suspicious when you were here to supposedly mend ties. Gahl might have been drunk enough to forget the impasse but Atreus was not as dimwitted. 

“Well, I suppose I can’t refuse such a kind invitation,” you gritted out as politely as possible. 

Gahl clapped once, loudly and turned back, calling to Lem, “Wonderful! Lem my boy, you’ll meet our friend in the lobby, yes?”

“Of course,” he said, blonde head popping out of the doorway and offering you a sympathetic smile. “You can go drop your things off and change if you’d like, I’ll wait for you.” 

You sighed and flashed a hopefully convincing grin at the three men, “Thank you, I shall see you momentarily.” 

With that you tried your best not to turn and bolt, but waited at least until you got three corridors down before collapsing to the floor in a pile of stuttering breaths and shaking hands. You tucked your head between your knees and tried to inhale deeply. The insides of your head pounded with the slick, viscous sound of Atreus’s words. The only thing that pulled you to your feet again was the insistent need to get as far away from it as possible. 

The hallways blended together as your feet carried you father and father from the offices, the Representative, and your almost murderer. You had hoped your room would offer some reprieve from the panic, that there may be someone waiting for you inside to spin comforting lies of safety. 

There was not. 

The room contained nothing but freshly made sheets and a white blotch on the wall where a hole had been patched. 

Nothing at all to indicate the Commander had set foot there since your return. 

You considered calling for him briefly. It had worked before, and the shame of crawling behind his hulking form to hide away was incredibly alluring. But instead you found yourself discarding your jacket and top in favorite of something slightly more upscale. The clothes landed in a pile by the bed where you sat for a moment. 

With the door and several floors of high rise architecture between you and that slimy bastard of an advisor, you thought again about what your second dive into espionage had dredged up. 

‘In his head’, Atreus said you were in his head long before you ever came on this assignment. Kylo had bristled at the words, shut you down quickly and you were used to secrets—you had many yourself—so you knew one when you saw it.   

Bond. 

The word rolled around in your skull, burned on your eyelids in that awful, messy script. 

It hurt to think about. 

Physically hurt, like someone was digging needles into your spine. 

So you didn’t think about it. 

Not yet. 

Instead, you finished fixing your outfit and walked back out of the empty room. There were answers and you would find them, but it was clear you’d have to get them on your own. So you let the door click shut behind you and took a deep breath. It was just dinner. You could do dinner and you would get your answers. 

On your own. 

****

The food looked painted onto the plate, contrasting colors and lovingly set out, but tasted like sawdust in your mouth. A shame too, it smelled better than anything you’d been served yet on Coruscant and was certainly a hundred times more extravagant than anything the Finalizer’s cafeterias stocked. 

But having the man who was seconds away from killing you just a short hour ago stare diagonally across the table with his corpse like eyes every time you moved did quite the number on your appetite. 

Thankfully, Lem was seated in front of you and had been prattling away for most of the meal, leaving you with little silence to fill. Part of the way through your fourth or fifth wood-chip bite, Gahl decided to change that. His voice was low and grated with age as he turned in the seat beside you to speak. 

“So, how are you enjoying your stay on Coruscant?” he asked, inching his leg out of the chair and closer to yours. 

“You’ve been very hospitable, Representative, I have absolutely no complaints,” you lied through your teeth, smile just as purposefully arranged as the food in front of you. 

Gahl’s hand patted your thigh just as he’d done at your first meeting, “Glad to hear it, I’m sure it’s nothing like those Star Destroyers.” 

You cursed every social rule of polite society which kept you from putting your knife through his hand. 

“It’s certainly a change of pace,” you mumbled around another flavorless mouthful. “Lem has been a wonderful guide.” 

In fact, you would give anything to be surrounded once again with nothing but bland, grey durasteel and the eyes of officers who were more than happy to pretend you didn’t exist. You’d even take standing in General Hux’s office, watching his ginger head flit about between sifting through files and insulting your diction in reports. If the Commander would even bother to look your way, you would have taken his cold, inaccessible stare over this as well. 

As your thoughts drifted further in the direction of Kylo Ren, another chilling voice joined the conversation. 

“Oh, don’t feel the need to flatter him,” Atreus chose that moment to chime in, scoffing into his napkin. “No doubt Alba’s simply talked your ear off about his low class, wait staff dalliance.”

Lem bristled, cheeks a comical pink with rage, “He has a name.” 

“Well, I’m sure he does, but I simply do not care to learn it,” Atreus sipped his drink and scowled. “You shouldn’t be fraternizing with the servers at all, it’s unbecoming of an aide to the Representative.” 

Across the table, Lem deflated and looked between you and Gahl. You were given the distinct impression this was not a new topic of conversation. 

“He’s right about that my boy, you can buy whoever you like now on the salary I pay you,” the Representative chuckled and downed the contents of his glass. 

“I’m sure our guest would agree,” Atreus’ eyes were trained on the plate but you felt his gaze on you all the same. 

“Relationships between superiors and subordinates are...frowned upon in the Order, I suppose.” 

You only caught a glint of the light off Lem’s slicked yellow hair as he turned toward the man beside him. 

“Certainly but it must happen,” he said.  

“Of course it does,” Atreus looked at you then, the blue of his iris was so light it nearly blended into the whites. “But it would be quite a dangerous predicament, especially somewhere like the Order, would it not?”

You were sure to keep your face blank and unassuming, though it was either much less convincing than you believed it to be or Atreus was actively capable of hearing the panicked screaming of your internal monologue. 

“Yes, yes it would be,” you nodded and looked back down to the table. 

“Particularly with someone of your standing, working directly under the General, I can only imagine the implications of a relationship with anyone high enough to be your senior.”

You could feel your eye twitch and your jaw tense almost against your will, as if Kylo Ren himself was choosing this very moment to inhabit your body. Really, you almost wished that he would, especially with his aggravating ability to remain completely unreadable in even the most stress inducing of situations. But alas, the only part of you Kylo inhabited was your mind in the form of an incredibly inappropriate slew of evidence for your so-called ‘dangerous predicament.’ 

“Hm,” you hummed quietly in agreement, hoping he’d drop the subject. “It would be quite unsightly, I’m certain.”

Meanwhile, Lem stared at you incredulously and hurriedly excused himself from the table mumbling something about the restroom. His blonde head quickly disappeared into the crowd and you were left alone with the Representative and his advisor, a pit developing in your stomach. And it was only made deeper by the muted betrayal in Lem’s parting tone. 

“The boy has always been too sensitive,” Gahl offered by way of explanation and Atreus nodded slowly. 

“He cracks too easily under scrutiny. He should know by now that softness is not a very useful trait in this line of work.”

You frowned and shifted in your seat, swiftly moving the Representatives gnarled hand from your leg. 

“Some amount of give is crucial in politics,” you said, gaze flicking between the two men. “It’s important to be able to bend to your adversary every so often. Being underestimated by your opponent often means you’ve been unwittingly awarded the high ground.” 

Gahl laughed heartily again as you excused yourself as well, though Atreus remained stony calm even when you glanced back between the sea of tables and waiters and expensive suits. 

Lem emerged from a side door not long after you’d posted yourself in the short, empty hallway leading to the restrooms. He would have walked straight past you if not for your hand swiftly yanking him back by the arm. 

“Wait,” you hissed as he turned to face you huddled in one of the doorways.

“What?” he hissed back.

Well. That was a fair enough question, though you hadn’t exactly thought that far. 

Lem stared at you with brows furrowed, obviously less than thrilled with how things were left off. A small part of your mind, which you were more than happy to bury and ignore, whispered that you ought to apologize. But that was most certainly not why you came after him. 

No, leaving the table was simply to punctate your last statement. 

Not because some part of you felt...guilty. 

Absolutely not. 

In fact, this was a perfect opportunity to do some more digging. Lem was your pseudo-informant and that was all. 

Right. 

That was certainly why the following words left your mouth in a tumble. 

“Are you okay?”

Lem paused as you let your hand fall from his arm, shuffling back so he could stand out of sight in the door frame across from you. He still looked cross, but his lips quirked up just a bit. You supposed he’d asked you the same so many times in just the last day, it would be appropriate for you to return the favor.  

“Yeah,” he mumbled. “That was by no means a new conversation.” 

“Under different circumstances, I would have been a bit more…” you trailed off and Lem offered you a signature toothy smile. 

“Appearances and all, I get it. Atreus uses any excuse he can find to bring up Jane since he caught us a week or so before you got here,” Lem sighed, running a hand through his neat hair. 

“Who?” 

The look you received was even more incredulous than before. 

“Jane, my—”

“Right, the waiter,” you nodded and raised your hands in apology, “so, why exactly does it matter who you’re seeing?”

Lem shook his head, “It doesn’t really, since I’m just an aide, but I’m fairly convinced he’s been trying to get rid of me since he was brought on.”

A gaggle of restaurant staff rushed past to the bar where a woman was loudly complaining about her food. You welcomed the attention her display drew away from you. 

“Oh, he wants me gone too,” you muttered and quickly waved off the comment when Lem leveled you with another confused glance. “Any particular reason why?”

He shrugged and hunched over so he could lower his voice, “Not sure, but I do know he’s been butting his greasy head in whenever the opportunity presents itself. He climbed the ranks quicker than most of the other staffers.” 

Now that was interesting. Bless Lem and his affinity for gossip. 

“That seems odd,” you frowned. “I hadn’t heard of him until this assignment, and I like to think I’m fairly well informed.” 

Lem scoffed and peered over his shoulder as if he would find Atreus there, breathing down his neck, “I’m sure you are. He just happened to materialize one day, determined to take my job.” 

Yes and your life as well, but Lem needn’t know about that. 

“Strange.” 

“Yes it is,” he replied. “And they’ll think the same if we’re gone much longer.” 

You nodded and watched him turn to merge back into the crowd, but he paused halfway into the hall. 

“Thank you,” he said simply and slipped away, past the bar and into the waves of diners. 

You waited another few minutes after Lem disappeared, and allowed yourself a small, secret smile. If for no other reason than your success at finally piecing together some information about the spiraling mess your life had become. But mostly at the rosy cheeked and chuckling sincerity that alleviated some of the uncomfortable fluttering in your stomach. 

And you found the food a little less like chalk, the nerve wracking stares and inappropriate touches a little more bearable the rest of the night. 

***

The elevator ride back to your room was far more excruciating than any of the other unpleasant encounters you’d experienced that day. At least when you were cowering on the floor making peace with the fast approaching end to your mortal body, you couldn’t feel the bearer of your death breathing down your neck. 

It was so uncomfortable, you actually wished that the touch-happy, drunken Representative had tagged along instead of staying back till last call at the bar. Your heartbeat racketed up three times its normal rate when Lem pressed the button for his room a few floors below yours instead of riding back with Atreus to the office suites. 

“Did you want to discuss my notes for a bit?” you asked, trying and somewhat failing to keep the desperation out of your voice. 

Lem looked at you with a strange expression on his face, nose turning a darker shade of pink than usual, “Oh, ah, another time maybe. I have, um, someone waiting for me.” 

From behind, Atreus scoffed. 

“Truly, you are shameless, Alba,” he said and you heard him shift behind you. 

“Right,” you wanted to push the issue harder, but it would be worse if Atreus suspected you knew anymore about his plot than he already did. “I’ll see you later in the week then.”

The panel above the transparent sliding doors rang and Lem stepped out into the hall, “Yes, well not too long till the big reveal, so I’m certain we’ll be seeing a lot of each other.” 

The soft hiss of the doors closing again reverberated in your bones like the thunking of an executioner's blade. You swallowed as your tongue turned to stone in your mouth. There were only a handful of floors in between before your stop but that would be more than enough time to maim your body beyond recognition and throw it down the incinerator shaft. 

You reminded yourself sternly that it was unlikely Atreus would exact whatever assassination plan he had in place in such a secluded space, but fear responses were not easily reasoned with. 

Atreus remained resolutely out of your line of sight and that only made the deep, instinctual part of your brain howl for you to run, claw, bite. Oh if only it were that simple, there would surely be far fewer aggravating superior officers in your life. 

The numbers on the panel moved far more slowly than you thought they ought to. With every extended second you spent in that horribly cramped lift, the air grew thicker with tension and the rancid smell of panic. Finally, finally, the panel flashed your floor number and the doors moved aside to reveal the beautiful sight of an empty hallway. But just before you crossed the threshold to freedom, an iron grip clamped hard down on your wrist. 

“So sorry to keep you,” Atreus began and you spun to face him. “It has only just occurred to me I haven’t had the opportunity to discuss anything with you regarding the Representative and the subject matter of your speech.” 

He really had to wait until now to do this, now when escape was dangling over your head like an unfortunate prisoner hanging over the maw of a hungry sarlacc. 

“Yes, well Lem has been providing council with respect to the Order’s representation of Representative Gahl in all our official statements,” you replied calmly. 

The slightest twitch of your hand revealed a shocking amount of force hidden in the advisor's lanky arms. You stuck your foot back as the doors began to close, unable to bear another minute trapped behind them. 

“Of course, I simply wouldn’t want you being led astray by any of Alba’s short comings,” the grip on your wrist tightened almost imperceptibly, “I’d like to work more closely with you as we approach the first campaign endorsements.” 

 “Certainly,” you forced a tight smile in his direction. “I would greatly appreciate your input.” 

The words sliced your lips as they tumbled out. You were accustomed to lying, yes, but stars that was potentially the least believable statement that had ever left your mouth. 

“I’m sure.” 

Staring hard into his dead man’s eyes, you tried not to breathe a sigh of relief as he unfurled his fingers from your wrist. Stepping back clumsily into the hall you waited until the doors hid his cheap imitation of a smile before you heading down the hall to your room. Better he not know which turn you took. 

You ran the rest of the way back. 

The tightness in your chest subsided by degrees the farther you got to safety and you didn’t even bother denying to yourself the hope that your Commander in all his black cloaked, looming glory would be waiting to stand between you and the reality waiting just outside. 

You really should have known better than to put any faith in his promises. 

“Kylo?” you whispered into the empty room. 

He didn’t answer. Of course he didn’t, and maybe that was the only reason you were brave enough to call out for him. 

There was a familiar black bag propped in the corner by your luggage which indicated Ren had at least returned to the Federal District at some point during the evening. That at least was something of a comfort, though a very small one. 

You grabbed one of the chairs from the table and shoved it securely back under the door handle. It scrapped against the floor and your shin throbbed as you kicked it in place. Once again the clothes on you wore seemed to have been permeated with whatever disgusting, oily sheen that leaked off of the absolute slug of a man currently puttering around in his office planning the best way to choke the life out of you. They itched and stung and you tugged at them quickly, pulling each item off in a flurry like coals blistering your bare skin. 

Free from the growing pile of discarded laundry you dug around through your cases. Your hands still shook as you scattered the contents, pulling on fresh bottoms that didn’t reek of lies and aftershave. You paused as your fingers brushed against something far softer than any of your Order regulation garments. 

Large, flowing, and predictably black, Kylo Ren’s undershirt hung in your hands like a shroud. 

You battled with your instincts. Half of you—the portion still living in the past where hatred was a simple comfort—wanted to ball it up and stomp it full of dusty boot prints. That side did not win and its screaming reduced considerably as the shirtsleeves made their way down your arms. You were enveloped immediately in a sense of sheer relief coupled with the feeling that what you were doing was profoundly reckless. 

But even if it was a false sense of security, your hands and knees were not shaking as badly as before. 

The Commander was intimidating and cold, but in addition he was intimidating and cold and standing resolutely between you and danger which was more than you could say for just about any other coworker. 

You supposed he was probably a bit more than that now. 

Eyes shut, you recalled the warm, full feeling of his approval upon seeing you in his clothes. The way it rushed through you and pulsated when he let his voice echo in your head. You wondered what it felt like for him. Was your voice a grating nuisance or was it a tingle at the back of his neck, the shiver of cool hands or maybe the surge after a well won battle. 

How did he do it, you wondered. How did it feel to read you so easily? To know all your doubts and fears and micro-defiances before they left your mouth. And how did he remain so resolutely aloof? 

Even now, as you tensed your jaw and tried to focus on the smell of him surrounding you and conjure his presence, there was nothing but dead air. You sighed and let your knees thunk down to the floor.

Unsurprisingly, it seemed that Kylo Ren only appeared when he wanted to, only answered your thoughts when it suited him. You could scream his name into the void of your mind but you couldn’t force him there—couldn’t Force him there. Which was unfortunate for many reasons. Being capable of wielding the throat crushing, invisible fabric of the universe at your will would have come in handy in so many situations. As you rubbed your eyes and prepared to wallow more thoroughly in the mess your life had devolved into, something caught your eye amongst the sea of clothing. 

From the Commander’s open bag, you could see something brighter amongst the masses of black fabric. Further inspection revealed that the item was shoved into the back pocket of his trousers and when you looked closer, it was clear what you were looking at. 

Your underwear. 

Your underwear was hidden away in Commander Ren’s luggage. 

And in your half shocked, half strangled endeared state, a memory surfaced. 

The night you’d spent writhing on your bed as Kylo sat, watching as the Force fucked you open. The image of him was clear in your head—a princely, demonic being refusing you the luxury of pleasure through his touch and taking your soaked panties along as a trophy when he was finished with you. 

 It seemed like a lifetime ago. 

You’d thought it was a dream then. 

And wasn’t it? The lines between waking and fantasy were blurring more and more with every passing day. But Kylo hadn’t left. He was there when you woke, that you did recall clearly. But these were the same, still unwashed from all those nights ago. 

Kylo had said there was a difference between dreaming and projecting, and to be fair you’d never been able to tell them apart. The Force was somehow involved. The same Force which seemed to have a questionable relationship with existing inside you. But it stood to reason, if someone as incompetent and disconnected as you could think yourself into Kylo Ren’s presence on very specific occasions, that he could do so whenever the hell he wanted. 

And while the implications this knowledge had on all your other sexual escapades was at the forefront of your mind and burning your face to a crisp, another inkling was forming amongst the embarrassment. 

If the Commander truly had projected himself—whatever that really meant—into your room to fuck you into oblivion without lifting a finger and kept what he’d taken, maybe you could do the same. 

Maybe, sitting inside your coat pocket was your own dream contraband. 

Crawling across the floor, you sifted through the mess at the foot of the bed until your hand felt something small and hard. Your breath stuttered in your chest as you pulled a familiar leather bound notebook from the pile and turned it over in your grip—hefty and solid and so very real in your hands.  

Staring down at the book you were at once intensely excited and overwhelmingly terrified. Logically, you knew that you were alone here and free from prying eyes no matter how desperately you wished not to be, but delving into what promised to be the source for so many of your questions felt too risky in the open of your bedroom. 

Quietly, you leaped over the bed and scrambled into the bathroom, shutting the door behind you and sliding down to the floor. Only then, with your back barricading you in with the tile cooling your heated skin, did you crack open the cover and begin to read the sloppy, looping scrawl across each page. 

A picture began to form in your mind growing clearer with every passing page. 

It was very much like reading the ramblings of a madman, and upon passing the first ten or so pages, your initial deduction of mad ravings only grew more accurate. The entries were similar to that of a diary, each one detailing a new piece of intel discovered. And just as you’d noted before, almost all of it had something to do with Kylo Ren. 

And you’d thought you were a bit obsessive. 

There were names you didn’t recognize, and some you did—members of the Order, high ranking and not, scattered about. Occasionally passages were quoted from what seemed to be incident reports and older texts of galactic history. And of course, there were consistent references to the ever mysterious Force. All of which were written in such personal detail that you could be certain they came from someone who, unlike you, could and knew how to use it. 

The words were so jumbled, you had to reread each line and follow it like a hunting trail to the next running sentence. And the farther you got, the deeper you dived, the more you felt your insignificance looming—that tight in your throat feeling of being so small in the grand scheme of things. 

In this scheme of things at least.  

From what you could understand, all the events leading up to your assignment to Coruscant and everything that had transpired since your arrival all boiled down this: power and the struggle to possess it. 

And at the center of it all was Atreus, Kylo Ren, and, inexplicably, you. 

In this story, you began as nothing more than another pawn on the chess board. Your name appeared maybe twice in the entire first half of the nearly full notebook. You were a footnote, a name scribbled in the margins connected to the General due to your position. After that, it seemed Atreus had gotten his hands on some more confidential documents, dozens of them in fact judging from his lists. Some were immaterial and contributed nothing, but from what you could gather, buried amongst them were dozens of your correspondence all pertaining to the Commander and all of which more than hinting at the small grudge you carried for him. 

He’d even quoted lines from you. 

As you progressed, the text became even more garbled, the handwriting rushed and nearly illegible but it was easy enough to see where it was heading. 

You were meant to be an example—of that you were certain. But not for the First Order, not because one Coruscanti representative wanted to stick it to its totalitarian overlords. Oh no, the threat of your death was meant as an example to Kylo Ren himself. It was a message, a lure, cast down from Atreus. When you first began to piece this together, it sounded intensely nonsensical. 

Almost entirely due to the fact that this plan hinged on Commander Ren of all people, having a vested interest in your life. Which, up until very recently, you would have deemed impossible. If anything, you’d have guessed he would greatly benefit from your demise seeing as you were at best an annoyance and at worst a roadblock between him and forceful galactic takeover. 

But then you reached that word. 

Bond.

Scribbled over and bolded with arrows and circles. You still couldn’t truly grasp the gravity of what it meant, but looking it over again, you knew it was true. Whatever this thing was, between you and your Commander, this was its name. And having read the journal in its entirety, you understood now why that singular word had struck you so thoroughly to your core. 

“You aren’t going to die.”

How many times had Kylo said that to you now? 

And it was constructed to bring your downfall. This was exactly what it seemed Atreus was banking on. It seemed all this want, all this hypothermic, desperate searching for one another was manufactured. The sense of wholeness,  a sham. The pit inside you, the anger, the balm of Kylo moving inside you—all orchestrated somehow to fit into this master plan to remove the Commander and take whatever he was standing in the way of. 

Without this, you would have remained a nuisance swearing at Ren from across conference tables. Nothing more than a bug to be smashed against the wall and left to rot.  And that sat terribly on your shoulders. 

Just as the book fell from your hands and onto the tile floor, you heard a familiar rattling coupled by a crash from the room just outside. Heavy footsteps rang out against the floor and a door slammed. 

Your name was called softly into the stillness. Just as you had called for him. A few moments of silence passed before you could answer, and when you did your voice felt strange in your mouth. 

“In here,” you replied quietly, listening to his foot falls approach the door and come to a halt. 

When you closed your eyes, you could almost hear his breath. Kylo paused at the door, the soft thump of his hand coming to rest against the wood the only other sound he made. You didn’t move from the floor and he made no attempt to open the door. The tingle at the back of your neck, the slight tugging of your strings, told you he could feel the thoughts racing in your head. 

Only minutes ago you would have been relieved to feel the warm of him spreading slowly down your spine. Now it felt strangely soured. For a moment you thought he might rip open the door, maybe bend you over the vanity again and teach what happened when you called for him out line. 

But he didn’t. 

When you didn’t shift from your spot to step into his grasp, you felt him pull away and heard the rustling of sheets and clothing outside. You didn’t know what you would say to him now, so instead you got up slowly and turned the water on. The mirror fogged over as you stripped and tucked the little notebook away under your clothes so the steam didn’t seep into the pages. 

You could wash now, you thought, and hopefully Kylo would have fallen asleep or left to stalk the halls again when you finished. Then you could buy yourself some time to think, unbothered by other prying eyes in your head. 

You stepped into the stream and scrubbed your skin raw, and all while the little black book watched you from its place on the sink, ever plotting. 

---------------------------

Taglist lovelies: @couldntfuckingtellya @contesa-lui-alucard @thewilddingleberries @isaxhorror @cowboy-kylo @findyourdarkness @kit-jpg @shesakillerkween @obsessionprofessional

[inkwell1013]

Quiet Hands - Persona 5

Pairing: Yusuke & the Phantom Thieves (platonic), Yusuke & Natsuhiko (familial)

Genre: Oneshot, Angst with a bit of fluff, Found family.

Word count: 2.9k

Warnings: In this fic, Yusuke deals with a lot of internalized ableism and ableist remarks from Madarame. There is also some physical abuse, emotional abuse and depiction of a panic attack. The r slur is also used. Please bear these warnings in mind before proceeding. 

Summary: Madarame never understood Yusuke. He was quick to punish Yusuke for fidgeting. Yusuke learns that loud hands get him hurt. It is much better to have quiet hands. It is better to hold down all the stuff that makes him different. It is better to be who Madarame wants him to be. The Phantom Thieves seemed to disagree with this.

- - - - -

Yusuke was a creature of unbreakable habit. He enjoyed order and structure, and liked to know when he was expected to do things and how he was expected to do them. The slightest disruption to his routine would send him spiralling, leaving him in a horrible mood for the rest of the day.

Today was one of those days. Madarame had invited a guest over without warning Yusuke beforehand, and that had sent him into a tantrum of epic proportions. He didn’t like strangers and he didn’t like surprises, so this was a particularly detestable event in his eyes.

Madarame dragged him downstairs despite his vehement protests. “I don’t want to,” whined Yusuke, trying to pull his arm out of Madarame’s grip. “Let me go!”

“Oh, grow up Yusuke!” snapped Madarame. “You’re not a little kid anymore, and this whining is completely unacceptable for someone your age. Sometimes you must do things you don’t want to do. That’s life, and complaining isn’t going to change anything. Now, you will behave and act normal in front of this curator, or I will ground you for the rest of the week. Do you understand me?”

Yusuke squirmed in his grip. “But it’s so difficult Daddy. I don’t like new people.”

Madarame scowled. “I am not your father. What do you call me?”

“Sensei,” sniffed Yusuke. “Do I really have to do it Sensei?”

“Yes, the curator is expecting to meet you. I’m not having you embarrass me again,” said Madarame, shoving Yusuke into the living room.

The curator stood to greet them as they came in. He was an aggressively friendly man, who immediately went to shake Madarame’s hand with a wide, toothy smile on his face. “Is this your son?” he asked brightly.

“No, he’s my student. I took him in after his mother’s death,” explained Madarame, pushing Yusuke forward. “Why don’t you say hello Yusuke?”

Yusuke mumbled a hello, doing anything to keep from making eye contact, which was made difficult by the fact that the stranger seemed to be attempted the exact opposite at every opportunity. “I apologise for his behaviour,” said Madarame. “He’s a little shy.”

He punctuated the last word with a sharp glare. Yusuke curled further in on himself.

“I understand,” laughed the curator. “My daughter’s shy too. Anyway, what layout are we thinking for this new exhibit?”

Madarame and the curator launched into a lengthy conversation about the upcoming exhibition, thankfully leaving Yusuke out of it. He didn’t want to talk anyway.

All this stress of meeting a new person was making him feel a bit shaky. Similar to how a kettle filled with boiling water needed a way to release the rising pressure, he had found his own way of release. It varied by situation and circumstance, and today it had manifested as fluttery fingers. The curator hadn’t noticed, still engrossed in the work that Madarame was showing him.

Madarame shoot Yusuke a murderous glare and reached over a hand. He pinned Yusuke’s wrist to the table, forcing his hands to a standstill. The curator happily continued with the conversation, having not noticed at all.

“Quiet hands,” hissed Madarame. “You know the rules.”

Yusuke knew he was in trouble.

Nothing happened until the curator left. Madarame was cruel, but he wasn’t stupid. He never struck Yusuke in public and never in front of others - he had his reputation to worry about after all - but things were different behind closed doors.

As soon as the front door slammed shut, Madarame struck, like a viper leaping from the brush. He yanked Yusuke forward, sharp nails digging into his wrist. Stumbling, Yusuke desperately tried to regain his footing, but was thrown of balance again when Madarame smacked him on the side of the head, sending him lurching to the left. He was lucky enough to grab a hold of the coffee table before he hit the ground.

His ear was ringing with discordant chords of a half-finished song, and his vision was blurred, but he could still make out Madarame’s scowling face.

“Sensei, I—”

“Ten fucking minutes! That was all I asked,” screamed Madarame. “And you couldn’t even do that. What is wrong with you?”

Yusuke stared down at the ground. “I don’t know…” he muttered.

“You don’t know?” Madarame said incredulously. “I’m not having a retard for a student. You need to learn to control yourself. No more of that stupid fidgeting. I’ve let it go on for far too long anyway.”

“But I can’t control it,” said Yusuke.

“You will learn. You are not a wild animal that is completely lacking in self control. I raised you better than that.”

“Sensei, you can’t—”

“I’m doing this for your own good Yusuke. No one is going to take you seriously if you act like that. Now go to your room and think about what you’ve done,” spat Madarame. “Don’t think I’m feeding you after this outburst.”

 Things only got worse after that. Madarame stayed true to his word and punished Yusuke for the fidgeting whenever he saw it. That didn’t mean that Yusuke stopped though; he just learned to hide it in front of his mentor. He learned to bottle it all down and release it when he was on his own so he could avoid the punishment.

Even so, the pressure was always building, hissing and screaming to be let out. Sometimes he couldn’t stop it from erupting out of him. Those where the worst days. He would be left shaking and crying, scratching at himself, trying to alleviate that crushing feeling deep down in his soul.

He was only hurting himself – he knew that – but it was the only way to make himself feel better.

Madarame didn’t understand it, just as he had never understood anything about Yusuke. As always, he resorted to violence. He would smack Yusuke on the back of the head every time, repeating the same words.

“Quiet hands.”

Like how a dog can be made to salivate at the sound of a ringing bell, Yusuke was conditioned to associate exhibiting these behaviours in front of others with fear. With pain. Whenever Madarame had guests over, he played the role of the perfect protégé and dutiful student, exactly how Madarame wanted him to, so that he could avoid his ire.

Not once did he question it.

Madarame just wanted what was best for him.

That was the only explanation.

 As sad as it was to admit, Yusuke had never had friends before he met the phantom thieves. He had always been too busy with his art and studies and never had enough time to socialise. No one at his school liked him enough to talk to him anyway.

The closest person he had to a friend when he was a child was Natsuhiko, who had been more like a brother to him, but Natsuhiko left when Yusuke was ten years old. Ysuuke didn’t even get to say goodbye. He just found his bed empty one morning and was informed of his departure over breakfast. Yusuke never quite forgave Natsuhiko for leaving him like that.

The Phantom Thieves were a motley crew, but they were the kindest people Yusuke had met in a long time, so he was happy to call them his friends. They were all kindred spirits, people who had been beaten down and abused by the world, and people who wanted change.

He found solace in their friendship. It was comforting to be around people who were so much like him, who had similar pasts and experiences, and who could understand him.

That day he was reminded of how kind the Phantom Thieves were.

Yusuke had started yet another one of his passionate rants – this time about an artist from the Edo period, who was well known for his unique handling of colours and composition – and instead of blowing him off and ignoring him, as he had expected them to, everyone was paying attention to what he had to say.

And he loved it. Art was a second parent to Yusuke (it had certainly done more to raise him than Madarame ever had) and he would happily ramble about it for hours on end. Once he got going, he could rarely force himself to stop.

There was a lull in his ramble, and he realised how rude he was being. “I apologise,” he said. “I let that go on a bit long, didn’t I? I have a bad habit of running my mouth. It won’t happen again.”

“We don’t mind man,” said Ryuji. “Art makes you happy and shit. We get that.”

“It’s like me and computers,” added Futaba, who was crouching on the couch and fiddling with the ends of her hair. “Sometimes you’ve just got to talk about these things.”

“Whatever makes you happy Yusuke,” said Ann.

“We’re your friends,” explained Ren, leaning dangerously far back in his chair. “We only want you to be happy, and if this is what makes you happy, go for it.” Haru and Makoto nodded in agreement.

Yusuke couldn’t stop himself. He felt bubbly and ecstatic. All that energy had to go somewhere and he found his hand flapping, quite without his input or permission. He rocked on his heels, riding that wave of joy.

It didn’t last long however, and a wave of horror came crashing down upon him as soon as he realised what he had done. Everyone was staring at him and he was frozen in place.

It was like he was the painting in Madarame’s palace. That damn thing haunted his dreams. He would never forget it – the reminder that he was nothing than a thing to the man who raised him. The man he thought of as his father. It sneered at him, as he tossed and turned, reminding him that he would never truly be free.

A tiny sliver of his brain knew that Madarame was gone, and couldn’t hurt him anymore. But it was overwhelmed by everything else that was screaming at him that he was in danger. That he needs to run and not look back. But he couldn’t even do that.

They’ll only hate you after this.

He tried to force himself to say something – anything – but couldn’t force out a single sound. He swore that he couldn’t breathe. Everyone’s eyes were on him. His heart was racing, pumping adrenaline through his veins that he wouldn’t even use because he was too terrified to run, let alone move.

“Yusuke is something wrong?” asked Ren, ever the gracious leader. Yusuke wasn’t sure if he would be able to handle it if Ren hit him. He was usually so composed, but Yusuke knew he packed a mean punch. He had seen him use it on shadows before.

Maybe, if he uses it on you, you’ll turn to dust and blow away as well. Then you won’t bother them anymore. They’ll be happy that you’re gone.

“I can’t— I don’t— I need—" he stammered, unable to form the words correctly. Everyone was staring at him. This was so humiliating.

Ren cast a desperate look to Futaba, who nodded and swayed to her feet. She inched toward Yusuke and reached out a hand to touch his shoulder. Yusuke flinched and she pulled away.

“You need to breathe Yusuke,” said Futaba. “I know it’s hard, but you need to breathe. In for four, hold for seven, and out for eight. Come on, do it with me.”

Yusuke took in a single shaky breath. And then another. Soon, his heart stopped palpitating at a million miles an hour, and he finally felt stable.

“I’m sorry,” he mumbled. “I don’t know what came over me. I- I don’t know. It simply happened.”

“It’s okay. You were just having a panic attack. Have you never had one before?” asked Futaba.

“No…” said Yusuke. “I can’t believe I lost control like that in front of everyone. This is mortifying.”

“No one’s going to judge you or anything. These things happen,” said Futaba, with a shrug. Everyone else nodded. “Do you know if anything triggered it?” she asked.

Yusuke chewed on his fingernails, a nervous habit that he never managed to kick, despite Madarame’s best efforts. “You’ll think it’s stupid.”

“We won’t. Trust me.”

“I am different to other people,” he admitted. “I always have been. When I was young, I had bad habits that were beginning to cause problems, so Madarame took it upon himself to… fix my issue.”

Futaba frowned. “You don’t mean..?”

“He used to hit me. It was never anything that bad, and never enough to bruise or scar, but it was adequate, and corrected the problem. I believe losing control and exhibiting that behaviour again in front of others was enough to remind me of it. I apologise for worrying you all.” He bowed his head, staring down at the ground.

There was a long, empty silence, which was broken by Ryuji. “Dude. He was abusing you.”

Yusuke blinked. “And that’s… bad?”

“Of course it’s bad!” exclaimed Ann. “He hurt you. It’s no wonder you’re afraid of him.”

“Why didn’t you tell us?” asked Ren, staring Yusuke down.

“I didn’t think it was important…”

Futaba walked over to the couch and took her previous crouched position. “So, Inari, are you autistic?” she asked.

Yusuke scowled. “I don’t see how that’s relevant. I was diagnosed as a child, but I grew out of it.”

He was a little surprised when Futaba cringed and Ren shook his head. “You don’t grow out of autism Yusuke,” said Ren, as gently as he could. “It’s a part of who you are.”

“But I’m not autistic anymore! I’m not. Madarame fixed me,” exclaimed Yusuke.

“Man, not to rude or anything,” interjected Ryuji. “But he lowkey traumatised you. He didn’t fix shit.”

“Hitting someone for stimming is like punishing your puppy for wagging it’s tail,” said Makoto. “You’re just doing what your body wants you to do. It’s normal. We all do it.” She gestured between herself, Futaba, and Ren.

Yusuke’s eyes widened. “You mean, you’re all like me?” he whispered.

“Yes,” said Ren “You’re not alone.”

“Thank you,” he mumbled, rubbing at his face with the sleeve of his shirt. Why was he crying? “You’re all too kind.

Ryuji rolled his eyes. “Nah. We’re just not shitty people like that bastard. Sorry if that’s rude or whatever, but it’s true.”

Yusuke couldn’t stop himself from snickering. “That’s absolutely true. He was a grade A asshole”

“Group hug!” announced Haru, launching herself at Yusuke. Soon, Yusuke found himself in the middle of a crushing group hug with every single Phantom Thief except Morgana, who was still peacefully sleeping on the windowsill.

“You’re a bit weird,” said Ryuji. “But you’re our weirdo.”

 It was Yusuke’s turn to decide where the group went on their weekly outing, and he chose the planetarium. Natsuhiko had taken him there once, when Yusuke was about ten years old. Looking back, he knew it was because Madarame had come home drunk again and Natsuhiko didn’t want him to see that.

It was funny how many of his good memories were tainted by hindsight.

Even so, the day stood out in his mind. It was a single happy moment in the sea of abject misery that was his childhood. Natsuhiko had spent the entire evening pointing out different constellations and telling Yusuke stories about them.

Even after Natsuhiko left, Yusuke remembered the stories. He would trace the constellations onto his palm and whisper the stories to himself, desperately clinging onto the few things he had left of Natsuhiko. He remembered every single word, exactly how Natsuhiko had told him.

He and his friends found their seats and settled down. The lights flickered on above them, stars appearing in the dark expanse. He remembered Natsuhiko daring him to try and count them. It was impossible; there were just too many. An incomprehensible number.

It was beautiful. He would paint it, but he could never capture its majesty quite right. All the swirls of purple and blue and black, with pinpricks of light shining through, filled the entire domed ceiling. It would never fit on a canvas.

Futaba leaned over and whispered to him, “Do you know any stories about the stars?”

“Are you sure you want to hear?” replied Yusuke. “You know how much I can go on about these things.”

“Of course. We all want to hear!” said Ann. Yusuke looked around to the smiling faces of his friends and couldn’t help but grin himself.

“Okay,” he said, flapping his hands, as he collected all the right words. Flapping was his favourite stim. There was nothing quite like it for that fluttery, excited feeling in his chest. “Can you see those three stars over there that form a line?” he said. “They are a part of a constellation called ‘Take No Fushi’. They represent a bamboo cane, being held by a young girl. The story stays that she and her sister were carrying buckets of water balanced on canes of bamboo, when they were attacked by a fearsome Oni. There was no escape, so they climbed a rope towards the sky. The elder sister became the moon, and the younger sister became the stars that trail after her…”

Everyone was listening to him. No one minded his stimming. He knew, for the first time in years, that it was okay to be himself around those he loved.

[sithsecrets]

A Matter of Expediency - Part XII

After being married off to Kylo Ren in the name of securing an heir to the First Order’s throne, a princess tries to navigate the ins and outs of married life. As she grows closer to her new husband, the princess also carves out a place for herself in the Order, assuming control over her life when she thought she would have none.

---

Part 12

4k words

Mentions: allusions to past/possible abuse, swearing, sad themes about pregnancy

---

Final preparations for your charity gala are done in the snow, puffy white flakes falling from an overcast sky as servants bustle about the Palgoduan castle. You oversee some of the goings-on, a bit tired from your fitful night’s sleep. Kylo is elsewhere, preoccupied with some Order business of a different sort, and you cannot help but feel a bit thankful. Though you’re in better spirits today, sadness lingers at your core, and the last thing you need right now is Kylo asking you if everything’s alright.

Queen Eleanor is by your side for most of the morning, holding her pregnant stomach as the two of you walk about together. She is so sweet, this Queen of Palgodu, but you still feel a pang of jealousy each time you lay eyes on her, on her children and her body. You ty very hard to do as Miriam told you, to not dwell on your empty, fruitless womb, but that’s easier said than done.

At midday, the Queen declares that she is practically starving to death, and she very graciously invites you to take lunch with her and the children. Your first impulse is to decline the invitation, your raw heart wanting nothing more than to avoid sad reminders of all that you do not have, but you force yourself to accept anyway. It wouldn’t do to appear rude, and this childish little self-pity party must come to an end sometime.

You eat in a small, informal dining room in the company of Princess Maudie, baby Eli, and the children’s nurse, Mya. The meal you’re served is rich and heavy, lots of hearty meats, cheeses, and winter vegetables. Queen Eleanor practically inhales a slab of red meat all on her own, eating ravenously in a way that makes you believe that she really was starving.

Princess Maudie takes great interest you as lunch carries on, regarding you curiously as she munches on bits of shredded meat and little slices of fruit.

“Who are you?” the little girl asks after a while, head cocked to one side as she stares you down from across the table.

“Maudie, we talked about this,” her mother chides. “This is the Empress of the galaxy.”

“You met her yesterday, darling,” Mya adds.

Maudie seems perplexed by this revelation, though she moves past it quickly. Her next inquiry centers around why you’re here, asking next where you live after you tell her about your charity work. After serval minutes of intense grilling, Queen Eleanor and Mya tell Maudie that that’s enough.

“Nonsense,” you declare, amused by the little girl’s line of questioning. She’s quite intrigued by the fact that you live on a ship in space all the time, and she wants to meet Kylo again since she, quote, “forgot about him, too.”

You’re in better spirits when you retreat back to your chambers, but rather tired. A nap would do you good before the party, you think, so you draw the curtains and climb into bed. Sleep comes easily, and it’s some time before you wake again.

The room is no different when you open your eyes, sunlight still trying in vain to seep in through the thick curtains you shut tight. Everything is dim and dark, just as it should be, but you’re no longer alone as you were when you lied down.

“Good afternoon,” Kylo murmurs, the pad of his thumb soft and warm on your cheek.

Snuggling against your husband’s touch, you give him a sleepy, loose smile. “It certainly is now.”

---

The merrymaking is well underway by sunset, everyone drinking and dancing and chattering happily as if none of you have a care in the world. Many important officials from around the galaxy are strewn about the room, your cause’s most generous benefactor by far. Others are around as well, of course, lesser nobles from Palgodu, a few choice friends. To your utter joy, Lydia, Helda, and Joon could all make it tonight, and you’re practically vibrating at the thought of seeing them again. Comm correspondence just isn’t the same, and you can’t wait to hear all about what’s been going on in their lives in person.

You and Kylo’s arrival is met with thunderous applause, though you’re thankful that you don’t have to formally receive any guests the way you did at your wedding reception. Nonetheless, you do a fair bit of schmoozing out on the floor, greeting ambassadors and generous benefactors alike as Kylo accompanies you. He’s quiet, letting you do all the talking, but the adoration in his eyes is not lost on you every time you look his way.

Joon finds you first, mercifully saving both you and your husband from a rather droll conversation with a couple of diplomats. Her approach is slow and deliberate, though smile on her face is wide.

“I was going to just run up and hug you,” Joon says, fitting the both of you together in an embrace, “but Nobi said that two Praetorian Reds would probably cave my head in before I could explain myself.”

You can’t help but laugh at that, squeezing your friend soundly. Even Kylo cracks a little smile, though it seems he doesn’t know quite how to act naturally in this situation.

Joon has much to tell you, talking your ear off as she whisks you away from the party’s main staging area. To your utter joy, Helda and Lydia are waiting for you off to the side, nursing drinks and talking idly until they see you approach. Their embraces are painfully and spectacularly familiar, warm in the way that true friendship should make one feel. Stars, you think you might cry as you look upon their faces, upon Lydia’s dark eyes and Helda’s red curls.

Poor Kylo is nothing more than an afterthought for a few minutes as you and Joon and Helda and Lydia all make over one another, chittering like birds and grinning like happy children. Only when he gently grasps your wrist do you remember yourself.

“I’m going to speak with Hux, darling,” Kylo tells you, bending down to press a kiss to your cheek. You feel bad then, expression melting into something apologetic and you twine your fingers together.

“I’m sorry,” you say, “you really don’t have to go.”

Unbothered, Kylo shakes his head. “I want you to speak freely with your friends. Find me in while, please.”

And with one last kiss on your face, your husband turns on his heel to leave, striding off in a dark swirl of cloak. You can feel eyes on your before you so much as turn back to face your friends, all of them no doubt about to tease you mercilessly.

“So that’s the galaxy’s biggest tyrant?” Joon muses, one eyebrow cocked. Helda’s grin is as sly as she can muster, and even Lydia seems pleasantly intrigued for once in her life.

“He’s not so bad,” you murmur, glancing over your shoulder at the back of Kylo’s retreating head.

“We’re glad to see that,” Lydia declares, the look in her eyes uncharacteristically soft.

There’s no more talk of Kylo after that, or of men in general, for the four of go out onto the dancefloor together. It’s just like old times again, you and your friends spinning and jumping and holding hands in time to the music, wisps of hair clinging to your flushed faces. And though it’s all great fun, you tire of the activity after a while, thirsty and a bit too sweaty for your liking under the thick fabric of your gown.

Helda and Joon split off from you and Lydia, both going in separate directions. It’s grown a bit late, Helda’s mother beckoning her away, Joon’s boyfriend missing her by his side. Lydia and yourself grab something refreshing to drink and head outside, warm despite the chill in the air. Neither of you says anything for a while, simply sipping out of your respective cups as the two of you take in the night.

You turn your gaze Lydia’s way, studying her face, the set of her shoulders. There’s something lighter about her, something… peaceful. As long as you’ve known Lydia, you’ve seen her happy or content, but at peace? Never, not once. It looks beautiful on her, truly.

“What’s happened to you?” you ask, words coming out of your mouth along with an icy puff of air.

Lydia turns to you, eyebrows narrowed, her own breath fogging before her face in the darkness. “What do you mean?”

“You seem different,” you explain, “like all the weight’s fallen off your heart.”

Lydia rolls her eyes at that bit of poetry, but the smile that creeps over her face is rather telling.

“I’m… I’m with someone now.”

A noise of surprise escapes your lips, uncontainable as a bolt of unbridled excitement shocks your chest. Lydia shies away from your exclamation, but you won’t let her off that easily.

“Who is he?” you demand, grabbing her arms now. “Where is he from? What does he do?”

“His name is Jacob, he’s from our planet, and he owns a manufacturing facility,” Lydia tells you, answering all of your questions in one go. “We met a couple of months ago at a harvest party in the country.”

“’Months,’” you breathe, though you can’t bring yourself to be angry at Lydia for not telling you about all of this until now. She’s so guarded, always has been— you’d be a fool for expecting anything less.

“I know,” Lydia concedes, speaking quietly. Some of the light in her eyes flickers for just a moment, jarring you from your euphoric state. “I wanted to be sure it would be different this time.”

You cup Lydia’s cheek then, willing her to stop thinking of that vile man you’re sure she’s seeing in her mind.

“Is he good to you?” you ask, because that’s all you care about. “I mean really good to you.”

And, as if someone flicked a switch, that soft, soft light is glowing in Lydia’s eyes again.

“Jacob is kind,” she tells you, “with his words and with his hands.”

You can’t help the tears that slip down your cheeks, hot reminders of how truly happy you are for this friend of yours. For Lydia, who deserves all of this and so much more.

“Well that’s good,” you begin, swiping at your cheeks, “because if he wasn’t, I’d have to have him executed.”

Lydia lets out a little laugh then, a real one, not one of the humorless barks that you’re much more accustomed to hearing. “I assure you he has no reason to tremble at your feet, Empress.”

It’s a jab, the emphasis Lydia puts on your title, but a playful one. You shove her for it still, rolling your eyes.

“If I remember correctly, you told me you’d help me become a runaway bride at my wedding reception, Lydia.”

The both of you break down into chuckles then, laughing at yourselves and at each other. And though it’s cold, though the wind is biting at your back through your bodice, you feel so very warm, wrapped in the company of an old friend.

“So when do I get to meet this Jacob?” you ask, locking arms with Lydia as the two of you retreat back into the warmth of the party. Your friend shrugs, as practical as ever.

“Well, if you’re willing to endure Princess Mila’s wedding—”

Your whole body shudders to a stop, your feet nearly tangling in your skirts as you take in that particular combination of words.

“Mila’s what?”

Lydia balks beside you, obviously taken aback by your surprise. “You didn’t know? Mila’s due to marry in a month. Your uncle arranged it, I’m sure, some nonsense about making mineral alliances. I can’t believe no one told you. Rumor has it that you and the Supreme Leader were to be invited.”

You’re not sure about all of that, given how you left things with your uncle and his children the night before your wedding, but the news itself is still… discomforting. Mila hasn’t shown you an ounce of kindness in years, but you know good and well what her father’s capable of. Stars, he sold you off without so much as a second thought, not caring what became of you once you were sent to live with Kylo. Everything worked out in your favor, but how were you, or him, or anybody else for that matter supposed to know that? Besides, you don’t think your uncle could get so lucky twice.

Lydia submits to a virtual interrogation right there in the middle of the party, giving up the name of Mila’s betrothed, the exact date of her wedding, and a few other pieces of information that are more gossip than confirmed fact. Apparently, most of the maids and the concubines are saying that your uncle’s selling Mila off to pay some of his gambling debts, the matter made even more sickening by the fact that her future husband is nearly as old as your uncle himself. The mere of idea of this makes your blood boil, for your marriage to Kylo bagged him similar benefits just earlier this year. And, to your horror, the man’s raised taxes on his people yet again without explanation.

Knowing your uncle, he’s taking every single credit and putting it right back on the card table. You knew he was a man who liked to have a good time, but fuck…

“I have to go speak to my husband,” you tell Lydia, pulling her into a quick hug before you start walking off. “Thank you, Lydia, really.”

Kylo is thrilled to see you, tucking you against his side with one strong arm as the officers around him bow. While the affection does make your heart bubble a bit, the anxiety you feel is much more pressing.

“May I speak with you?” you ask Kylo, praying that he senses your urgency.

Your husband takes you away at once, guiding you through the castle and back to your shared chambers without so much as a word of question. He listens intently as you tell him everything, rambling about Mila and your uncle and how the taxes on your planet’s people were already astronomically high to begin with.

“Do you have proof that he’s using the taxpayers’ credits to fund his lifestyle?” Kylo asks, coming to help you with the zipper on your dress. You shake your head as you slip your arms out of the sleeves, rushing to throw on something comfortable and warm.

“No,” you concede, “but I know how he is. When I came to live with him, I always wondered how he afforded the parties, and the women, and everything else that he fills his free time with. And it worries me that my uncle’s already angling to having his debts paid off again, especially at the expense of shipping Mila off to be with a man that he could have gone to school with. She’s supposed to be finishing her education, not helping him get out from under a bad habit.”

Kylo nods at that, though the look in his eyes expresses reservation. “My love,” he begins slowly, “why… why do you want to help your cousin? From what you’ve told me, she’s been awful to you all your life, and I certainly didn’t like what I saw of her at our rehearsal dinner.”

It’s a good question, and a hard one to answer at that. Kylo lets you think for a moment, pulling together some night clothes to wear to bed in the meantime.

“I want to help her because… because my uncle won’t live forever, and it’s not like he’s doing a good job of ruling as it is. My uncle may be impulsive, but he’s not stupid. Sebastian couldn’t pour water out of a boot if the instructions were on the heel, and Tensin is no better. Mila, though… Mila is cruel, but her wit is sharp. Without her working behind her brothers, the planet’s fucked.”

You pause for a minute, a bit irritated by your more sentimental feelings now.

“And, as a woman, I can’t send her off to marry that man. He’s old enough to be her father, and you know how all of those Valderan mineral barons are. I worry about what would become of her, what he would make her do…” You picture Lydia’s sad eyes, and something in your chest clenches. “Mila may be awful, but I can’t sell her out like that, not for my uncle’s bullshit. I remember how afraid I was when we got engaged, how much I feared not being able to please you.”

Kylo’s hand is warm on your face, the back of his fingers stroking over the curve of your cheek. You press into the touch, taking his hand in both of your own.

“But of course, all of my worrying was for naught because you’re more loving and gentle than I could have ever imagined. You respect me, and you want me to be happy, but I have a feeling that that’s not how Mila’s husband will feel.”

“If you think something must be done, then by all means, step in. I’ll have a ship prepared for you tomorrow at once.”

The both of you go to get in bed, more to relax than to lie down the night.

“No,” you say, waving Kylo off, “let me do some digging first. I want to be sure I’m right before I go off and make a big fuss at home.”

---

You’re back on the Supremacy by late afternoon, anxious to get to the bottom of all of this. Hux, ever the good friend, briefs the Board of Charitable Affairs for you, allowing you time to hole up in your office for most of the day.

You pore over financial documents, intel from First Order informants, and numerous reports, looking for discrepancies or abnormalities in your home planets spending and accounts. It’s no surprise to find that your uncle’s run up a long list of expenses, many of which are listed as “miscellaneous” or “personal”— or, to the layperson, stimulants and whores. However, no one’s cooking the books. It appears as though every credit is accounted for, every tax dollar where it should be— the money’s just being spent like it’s in the hands of a child. With everything correct (in an extremely technical sense) on your uncle’s end, you move on to Mila’s fiancé, a nagging feeling in your gut telling you that he warrants investigation.

Tarlak Tu’Iuni is middle-aged, decent-looking, and filthily, disgustingly rich. Mineral money, naturally, seeing that he was born and raised on Valdera. He’s never been married before Mila, but he has a couple of illegitimate daughters that he seems to care for in some capacity. However, Tarlak’s personal life matters little to you. It’s always the money with the mineral barons; they can be perfectly good people in their personal lives— real upstanding citizens, even— but they just cannot keep their accounts straight to save their lives. They always want a little extra, they’re always moving money around… Lets just say that paying taxes and being frugal are two things that do not come easily to the Vaderan elite.

But, well— you’re the Empress of the Known Galaxy. For every slick accountant a mineral baron like Tarlak Tu’Iuni has in his corner, you have five even slicker financial investigators in yours.

Your team comes to you with a report in a matter of hours, and you nearly fall down when you learn of their findings.

“You’re absolutely sure?” you ask the woman before you, clutching onto the datapad in your hands for dear life.

“We triple checked all of the transactions. These people are good, I must admit,” she affirms, shaking her. “This is the sort of fraud you have to really look for. I’m not surprised we weren’t tipped off until you made us start looking for inconsistencies.”

You blow out a huge breath, anxious and enraged all at once as you scroll through the numbers. Your companion’s right— even laid out plainly this way, most it seems legit.

“Would you like me to contact the Guard?”

“No,” you tell the woman, though you’re grateful for her loyalty and sense of urgency. “Tell no one of this. I’ll handle it.”

“Yes, Empress.”

And then you and your bearer of bad news are going your separate ways, she to brief the team on your wishes and you to find your husband.

It’s later than you’d realized, the intensity of your work sapping away time with little effort. The ship’s night cycle is well underway, guard shifts down to barebones personnel, most corridors empty and quiet.

Kylo is with his nights, just as you suspected, the lot of them stowed away in a dark corner of the ship that they like to frequent. Each one rises to their feet upon seeing you, the Knights bowing in respect as your husband comes to greet you.

“She’s been skimming off of the charity accounts,” you declare, holding out the datapad for Kylo to take before he can so much as say hello. “Her and all her fucking friends on Valdera. Mila’s fiancé is going to essentially paying off my uncle’s debts with money he and Chairwoman Evan stole from the Palgoduan donations and a couple of lesser projects in the Outer Rim. Millions of fucking credits, Kylo! Millions! And that’s just recently!”

You don’t mean to shout, but rage is hot in your veins now. Kylo looks horrified and bewildered all at the same time, scrolling through the information you’ve given him quickly. Not two seconds later, the air seems to crackle all around you, lights flickering under the influence of Kylo’s powers.

“Is your uncle in on this?” he asks you, eyes dark and wild as he regards you. The Knights stand at attention now, waiting for orders, waiting to be sent off for an attack.

“No,” you scoff, waving your hand flippantly. “They’d be stupid to involve someone like him in this. This is inside shit, crime committed amongst a tight-knit group of intelligent people. I wasn’t even looking for something like this, my team found it when I had them doublecheck Tarlak’s accounts.”

“It’s a good thing you did,” Kylo says, trying to stay calm even though you know an outburst is bubbling up inside him. His fist is tight at his side, shoulders tense and taunt. And the energy in the room… You’re just grateful he isn’t angry at you.

Finally, your husband hands the datapad back.

“We’ll deal with this issue at once,” he declares, and the Knights are ready to follow him out of the room without so much as a cue, the lot of them already grabbing for weapons and tools of destruction.

“Kylo,” you cut, stepping into his path. “Kylo, my love, let’s talk about this first.”

“That bitch stole money from the Order,” he spits, murder in his eyes. “All of those credits are for food, and medicine, and schools—”

“I know that, my love,” you soothe, though a fresh wave of rage does sweep through your insides at the notion of one of your subjects going hungry so that Evan and her cronies can play another hand of cards. “But we have an opportunity to make a statement here. Gutting Evan in her quarters may be satisfying now, but why not put let everyone else see what happens when they try to steal from the Order? Why not show the galaxy that we’re in control, that no one can just get away with things like this?”

Kylo draws in a shaky breath.

“I will have the offenders arrested at once. They shall be executed on a live broadcast tomorrow afternoon.”

You nod at that, satisfied with the statement. Still, you know your husband well.

“Well,” you begin, smoothing down the front of his shirt, pulling a few pieces of hair out of his face, “I never said all of them had to be executed publicly— just the important ones.”

Kylo’s hands come to rest on your hips, his grip tight on your body. Feigning innocence, you begin caressing his cheek in lazy, slow strokes.

“I also think it would be wise if we got a few of the main players to confess. You know, just so no one thinks we’re making this up. I’m sure you and the Knights could handle that, right, darling?”

[darkmasterofcupcakes]

Ultimate ship meme for Glow?

General:

Rate the Ship -  Awful | Ew | No pics pls | I’m not comfortable | Alright | I like it! | Got Pics? | Let’s do it! | Why is this not getting more attention?! | The OTP to rule all other OTPs

How long will they last? - They would definitely last forever - like, if there is some kind of afterlife for them, they’ll be together there as well. 

How quickly did/will they fall in love? - I actually imagine that falling in love for them was a slow process, like it often can be with relationships like theirs, which start as friends and develop into a romance. They kind of had this thing where they knew they loved each other before they realized they were in love with each other. 

How was their first kiss? - It was actually a pretty simple moment. They were just...relaxing together, probably snuggling on the window seat in Glimmer’s room, when Bow just kind of...gave her a little peck on the lips. Glimmer was a little surprised at first, but she kissed him back shortly after, and they just...kept snuggling for a while longer.

Wedding:

Who proposed? - Bow, and to steal an idea from my friend  tolstoyevskywrites he technically proposed twice. Once with a fairly simple ring that he literally shot through Glimmer’s window with a note asking her to marry him, and once later on with a fancier ring he made himself. She said “Yes” the first time, but he wanted to do it again, properly. 

Who is the best man/men? - Most likely a couple of Bow’s brothers, along with maybe Sea Hawk….And Swift Wind would probably insist on being “best horse” because excluding him would just be discrimination and rude.

Who is the braid’s maid(s)? - Adora is probaly one of them, and one of Bow’s sisters probably takes up the other spot (I still headcanon him as having brothers and sisters)

Who did the most planning? - Probably Bow did a little bit more, but Glimmer definitely offered her input a fair amount. Though, honestly, Castaspella probably made about as many decisions as either of them once she found out about the wedding. 

Who stressed the most? - Glimmer, without a doubt. Bow did his best to calm her down whenever he could. 

How fancy was the ceremony? -Back of a pickup truck | 2 | 3 | 4 | Normal Church Wedding | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | Kate and William wish they were this big.

Who was specifically not invited to the wedding? - No one was specifically not invited, though Glimmer did try and avoid her aunt finding out for as long as possible, just to try and avoid her taking over the preparations. 

Sex:

Who is on top? - They switch sometimes, but usually Bow’s on top.

Who is the one to instigate things? - Glimmer is the one who instigates things the most, particularly because she likes to…get Bow worked up during times she really shouldn’t, like during meetings. 

How healthy is their sex life? -Barely touch themselves let alone each other | 2 | 3 | 4 | Once a couple weeks, nothing overboard | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | They are humping each other on the couch right now

How kinky are they? -Straight missionary with the lights off | 2 | 3 | 4 | Might try some butt stuff and toys | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | Don’t go into the sex dungeon without a horse’s head

How long do they normally last? - They normally go at least two rounds a night, though sometimes three. How long the rounds last really does depend on the night, and how quick or slow they want to go.

Do they make sure each person gets an equal amount of orgasms? - They usually make an effort, and even if one of them “comes up short” one time, the other tries to make up for it the next time they have a chance to be intimate. 

How rough are they in bed? -Softer than a butterfly on the back of a bunny | 2 | 3 | 4 | The bed’s shaking and squeaking every time | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | Their dirty talk is so vulgar it’d make Dwayne Johnson blush. Also, the wall’s so weak it could collapse the next time they do it.

How much cuddling/snuggling do they do? -No touching after sex | 2 | 3 | 4 | A little spooning at night, or on the couch, but not in public | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | They snuggle and kiss more often than a teen couple on their fifth date to a pillow factory.

Children:

How many children will they have naturally? - They’d probably plan either two or three. I think Bow liked growing up with siblings and Glimmer used to think that she would have liked having a brother or sister, so they’d probably want more than one, but not so many that they’d feel totally overwhelmed. 

How many children will they adopt? - Probably none, not because they would be against the idea, but just because I don’t think it’d ever really cross their minds. That being said, if they were asked to foster a child or two, they would happily accept the offer.

Who gets stuck with the most diapers? - Bow, but he technically volunteers for diaper duty. He figures that since Glimmer has to feed the baby, the least he can do is let her get a little extra sleep while he changes the diapers. 

Who is the stricter parent? - Neither of them is exactly a pushover, but Glimmer tends to be a little more strict, taking influence from how her mom raised her growing up, even if she does try to give her own kids more freedom than she felt she had. 

Who stops the kid(s) from doing dangerous stunts after school? - Bow is already Glimmer’s impulse control, so he’d just kind of automatically take that role for his children as well. 

Who remembers to pack the lunch(es)? - They both remember and they take turns making the lunches. Glimmer is more likely to give them an extra snack, so the kids often ask her to make them more than they’ll ask Bow, but they each end up doing it about the same amount.  

Who is the more loved parent? - They’re both loved equally overall, but it depends on the specific child who they are closer to. And obviously neither of them is unloved by any of their children; they just have more in common with some of their kids than others. 

Who is more likely to attend the PTA meetings? - They both definitely try their best to attend, but Glimmer often has to deal with court stuff, so sometimes Bow has to go alone.

Who cried the most at graduation? - Definitely Bow. Glimmer might get emotional, but she does her best to not cry in public, while he just flat out doesn’t care.

Who is more likely to bail the child(ren) out of trouble with the law? - Probably Glimmer, if only because her rank basically means she can use her power to get them out of trouble without any real issue.

Cooking:

Who does the most cooking? - Well, they have chefs to do most of the cooking, but between the two of them, if you’re talking specifically cooking and not baking, that’s Bow. 

Who is the most picky in their food choice? - Neither is particularly picky in regards to food, but between the two of them, Glimmer might be slightly more picky.

Who does the grocery shopping? - They often go together, but Bow is the one who is more likely to do that particular chore on his own.

How often do they bake desserts? - Considering Glimmer has a sweet tooth, pretty much every other day, since they usually have leftovers from the previous night’s meal.

Are they more of a meat lover or a salad eater? - They’ll eat either, but if they had to choose between the two, probably go a little more towards the meat dishes.

Who is more likely to surprise the other(s) with an anniversary dinner? - Bow would be the one to actually get away with doing the surprise, just because he’s a better cook. Plus, he can usually get a little more free time to make the meal.

Who is more likely to suggest going out? - Glimmer, though Bow is pretty much never actually against the idea

Who is more likely to burn the house down accidentally while cooking? - Neither, though Glimmer is probably more likely to set off the smoke alarm

Chores:

Who cleans the room? - Glimmer will help, but Bow is the one who just sort of instinctively tidies up. It’s a habit he picked up after so many times of cleaning up Glimmer’s room while listening to her rant about her mom.

Who is really against chores? - Neither of them is against chores, though Glimmer is more likely to put off doing them until the last minute. 

Who cleans up after the pets? - Both of them. It was a joint decision to get pets, so they both take responsibility for them, including the messes they make.

Who is more likely to sweep everything under the rug? - That is Glimmer, without a doubt. She usually cleans properly, but sometimes she puts it off for a little too long and just needs to hide everything until later.

Who stresses the most when guests are coming over? - Probably Bow, but Glimmer has been known to have her last minute stressing moments, especially if their guests are someone she wants to leave a good impression on.

Who found a dollar between the couch cushions while cleaning? - Neither of them, because nobody who visits or lives there carries cash.

Misc:

Who takes the longer showers/baths? - Probably Glimmer, but even then, not by much, and really only when she’s super stressed and needs a way to relax, since a hot bath reminds her a bit of the steam grotto at Mystacor.

Who takes the dog out for a walk? - They take turns, but Bow does it more often, mostly because he likes to go out in the morning while Glimmer prefers to sleep in.

How often do they decorate the room/house for the holidays? - Every year unless they have something outside of their control that will keep them from doing so, and even then, they still try and do something, even if it’s not as big as they’d normally go for the holidays. But, whenever possible, they go all out. 

What are their goals for the relationship? - Nothing in particular, really. They just want to be together and grow and learn from each other for as long as they possibly can. But, ultimately, their main goal is just to be together and make each other as happy as they can.

Who is most likely to sleep till noon? - Neither of them really sleeps that late, honestly. Bow is definitely the one who gets up earlier, but Glimmer is usually awake by ten even without him waking her. 

Who plays the most pranks? - Glimmer, mostly because it’s easier to get away with a prank when you can just teleport away from the scene and pretend you had nothing to do with it.

[razorblade180]

Twin Snowflakes 26: Preparation

[part 1 of 2]

TSF pt25 here! <-

“THANK YOU, PEOPLE OF MANTLE!” Summer yelled, shredding each note of her personal favorite songs. One after another she played to her heart's fill. Each song was more aggressive and brimming with vigor than the last. Summer would’ve played till dawn if she had her way but neither her body or promise to her brother would allow that. It wasn’t time to leave yet but she needed a break.

Summer begrudgingly got herself to get off the stage to let others perform. Their music wasn’t terrible by any means but the other musicians could easily stand to have more practice. A rave audience isn’t hard to please however, so the crowd ate up the talent all the same. A little insulting to her own performance but eh, this wasn’t an actual contest. Summer was happy enough blowing off steam and listening to the beats from behind the stage. Not even she could deny the beats and tempo. Her hips couldn’t help but sway!

From the corner of her eye she could make out a familiar figure keeping an eye on her. “Did Nick tell you to keep an eye on me, Eliza?”

“Not really.” She walked over and poured herself a cup of water. “I was training in the area.”

“Are you saying he had nothing to do with you being here?”

“Oh no, that would be a lie. You know Nick, always negotiating. He really knows how to persuade a person. I wouldn’t be surprised if he could sell a heater to someone living in Vacou. Anyways, he didn’t ask me to stalk you or anything like that. He knew where I’d be and told me if I could swing by for a spell. No harm in that.”

Summer smiled. “Funny. That sounded like you were defending him. Don’t want me getting upset with my own brother?”

“Shut up. It would be a pain if I caused unnecessary controversy in a household. Need I remind you that you both have duties to the school that require your full attention? Frankly I’m glad I arrived. I don’t go to your concerts so my opinion of your performance skills was limited.” Eliza sipped her water, giving Summer’s attire and overall attitude a once over. “Where’s all this when you're getting harassed in the halls?”

“That’s...school is different.”

“Pfft, yeah okay.”

“It is!” Summer said, defensively crossing her arms.

Eliza watched the girl's face soften into the meek and reserved Summer she was used to. To think that’s all it took to shut her down. “I swear you and your brother don’t have a consistent bone in your body. Whatever the case, I don’t really care much as long as you bring your best effort to rehearsal and the live performance.”

Summer squinted. “Not the actual tournament?”

“Hey I don’t participate in the duos. You can bomb that for all I care. But you know, Nick is counting on you to pull your weight. Also it would be pretty annoying if you lost to Max and his asshole know-it-all, Darren. Gods know he’d talk about it until graduation.”

“Was the fight that happened in the school bad?”

Eliza shrugged, “Can’t say. Wasn’t there. He’s always been a thorn to me though so I don’t doubt he made things ugly. He was very rude to Veronica in the principal’s office as well. An act I find inexcusable.”

Summer couldn’t help but roll her eyes. “Look I know you admire her and all that jazz, but I’d bet she didn’t help the situation.”

“My views on her have nothing to do with it!” Eliza huffed. “I would think you off people would be sympathetic to a person like her.”

Summer leaned against a wall. “Call me jaded, but Veronica has a habit of bringing out the worst in people.”

Eliza frowned. “You know her better than I. Tell me, is she the type to lie about being harassed?”

Summer didn’t have to think long, especially after learning more about her in the forest. Then there was Veronica’s sketch journal. Summer still couldn’t make sense of all the scratched out pages. On top of that, Blake’s request made Summer even more uncertain. “No. Veronica’s a piece of work, but she isn’t a liar. She might actually be too honest if you asked me. I’ve never had to deal with Darren personally but Nick’s not a fan by any means.” Summer bit her bottom lip. She couldn’t believe it, did she just defend Veronica’s qualities!? It was only fair. Veronica did almost end up a frozen husk.

“Well it’s good to know we can all agree on at least one thing without fail. So not to rush you but how long are you planning on staying in a place like this?” Eliza asked, watching all the party animals.

“Haha, not your type of crowd?”

“The crowd is fine. I can handle a little noise and rowdiness, but it is technically a school night. I- ah! Summer!?” The girl had taken Eliza by the hand and started pulling her to the dance floor.

“If you keep bringing up assignments 24/7 then all you’re gonna look like is a stick in the mud. Live a little. School sucks!”

“School is important!” Eliza protested.

Summer grabbed Eliza’s other hand and started making them sway side to side, back and forth. The blood rushing to Eliza’s cheeks made Summer giggle. “Awww you know you dig it. I’ll make a deal. Cut loose with me for a few songs and I’ll gladly let you dance me right out the front door. Show me that colorguard rhythm!”

Eliza watched the petite girl actively laugh without reservation. Summer jokingly shimmied towards her and swayed her hips, getting lost in the music. Just how much did this girl go out to rave? She looked like she belonged here! The beat got more intense by the moment with no sign of stopping. With her pride in check, Eliza began to sway steadily, getting into the music.

Summer’s eyes lit up. “Aye!”

“Two songs and then we’re out of here.”

“Works for me! Show me what ya got!” Summer turned up the heat by dragging Eliza deeper into the chaos. She might not be as persuasive as Nick, but Eliza quickly found out Summer was definitely more pushy. Forget the tournament. Eliza was beginning to think they’ll beat her at everything!

xxxxx

“This is crazy. How did I not know about this!?” Nick said, walking down the rainy sidewalk.

Veronica smirked as she held Nick’s hand, allowing rain to pass right through them. “Why would you? I barely have any reason to use my semblance; let alone in the more complex ways.”

“You don’t use it when making clothes?”

“Haha, I’m not entirely sure how it would help. Unless I wanna get out of my clothes and into something new in an instant. Not a real trick to show others. Unless…” she blushed at her lewd teasing, refusing to finish the punchline. “Never mind.”

“Okay?” He had a feeling he knew where that was going but chose not to pull that grenade pin. “Speaking of clothes, that brings up a question. Why aren’t our clothes falling off now?”

“Control. Anything I touch can phase like me. My clothes are touching me, so are you. I can keep it strictly to myself though with control and timing. I can also start it and end it on any spot on my body; which is why we aren’t falling through the street.”

“That sounds hard.”

“Little bit. Really flexing my semblance like a muscle right now. Still, I’ve done harder, like not breaking surface tension.”

Nick did a double take. Did he hear that right? “Surface tension? Like...for water?”

Veronica nodded. “Yeah that’s the one. Well I’m not actually walking on water. It’s more of me beginning to fall through the water with my semblance, and shutting it off quick enough to push me back up just above the surface. Took a lot of practice but I got it most of the time. Waves suck.”

“Don’t you burn through your aura quickly?”

“Well it’s like flicking a switch on and off. Also I’m quick about it; not to mention not fighting anything in the water. I’m bound to fuck up them.”

“Still sounds like an extremely large amount of work and multitasking. You got real talent. I’d get a headache.”

“Says the king of multitasking.” Veronica chuckled, “It’s less thinking and more of reaction; knowing how to feel the shifts to the things connecting you.”

Her explanation was interesting. Veronica had an understanding of her semblance to a complex level though she didn’t fight. And here was Nick, struggling with a candle exercise for a semblance that didn’t interact with physics or molecules. “A reaction huh? Maybe I should try that more often? It might help with-”

“Valerie.”

“What? No my-” His hand was squeezed a little before being brought up to point towards the Schnee gate. Nick’s eyes went wide. Valerie stood by it with her mother’s car, staring just as surprised. “Oh…” Nick said.

The three stood quietly, not prepared in the slightest. Valerie was the most shocked. She was prepared for an awkward conversation with Nick by the door. Not catching him outside in a suit; next to Veronica. Nora, who was in the car, wanted to take initiative but found her lips tucking themselves in.

“Oh boy. Maybe convincing Val to see him was a bad move on my part.” She thought. Ren was gonna have a field day whenever Nora got back home.

Done with the shock, Veronica finally spoke. “Umm I can give you two a minute, if you need it?” All the events that happened tonight made her feel very pleased. Veronica did not want to taint those moments and knew it would be for the best to remove herself from this before she said anything...emotional. She turned to Nick and smiled awkwardly. “I’ll see you inside?”

Nick could only blink while he thought about it. Veronica was a bit quicker to the draw though. “No, no, it’s...clearly you two are in the middle of something. I was just leaving anyways” Val said, a hint of irritation and even a bit of sarcasm crept into her voice. It might not have been that big of a deal but for some reason it made Nick tense up.

“This is only happening because of you.” He said instinctively, catching everyone off guard. “I don’t see how you can be upset about a thing you caused. I did invite you originally.”

“Don’t see how that has to do with anything.” Valerie lied, clearly offended. “You can do what you want.I only came here to-”

“It’s always your terms.” He interjected, grumbling a bit. “You tell me you want space and we’ll see each other at the tournament, but then show when you feel like talking. If I did that you’d be pissed.”

“Hey! I came here to try and smooth things over.”

“Yeah well maybe I don’t want things smoothed over right now? I...I have nothing to say to you right now. We’ll talk at the tournament.”

Valerie let out a subtle gasp. Her brows furrowed and she bit down on her lip harder than she meant to. “Forget it. If you wanna be made then be made. Tournament it is.” Valerie didn’t waste another breath, getting back into the car so it can drive off.”

Veronica was in disbelief. Did that really just happen? In now way did she think the conversation was going to be good, but she at least thought there was going to be one. She might’ve thought this best if it wasn’t for Nick visibly sulking next to her as he started walking her up to the manor. The solemn look on his face did nothing but make her feel bad. Not to mention a little guilty.

“Hey...I know this is a dumb question but are you okay? If I influenced that in any way during dinner, that wasn’t really...what I mean is...”

“I know, and don’t worry. That wasn’t me being caught up in my emotions. I just really want to think about all of this for at least a couple days. Besides, I made a deal with Eliza. I might not keep it if Valerie tries patching things up.”

“You’re plotting on her? That’s...wow. Now I know for sure that you’re pissed.”

Nick rubber the back of neck. “For once I think I’ll get greedy, act the way I want. Does that make sense?”

“Make sense? It’s my language. Fair warning, your best quality is that heart of yours.” She poked his chest. “Keep it safe, or I’ll be the one getting greedy by knocking the optimism back into ya.”

“Oh is that right? Haha, maybe try praying to me first, then I really know you must mean business!” He teases.

Veronica gave a playful shove. “Like I’d know how to start one? I think I’ll stick with the tough love approach.”

“Tough love huh?” Nick opened the front door. His eyes never left the girl as she walked in, seemingly content. Veronica eventually looked back at him and gave a head tilt.

She blinked, “What?”

“Nothing.” He chuckled. Nick was starting to think that just maybe, he understood Veronica’s choices and beliefs a little more than he used to. If he learned anything from tonight it was just how differently they saw the world around them. “Well I guess this is the end of our date. Didn’t go as planned but I’ll admit it, I really liked spending alone time with you.” He said, rubbing the back of his head.

Veronica couldn’t stop herself from letting out an anxious chuckle.“Hehehe, what’s with the sweet talk all of a sudden? Trying to butter me up?”

“No, just being honest with myself. A date should end as well as possible.” Nick stepped towards Veronica and gave her a quick kiss on the cheek. Eager to not let this moment linger, Nick swiftly left for Summer’s room to see if she was back. Without thinking about it tonight, Nick had left two girls red and speechless. One of them standing in the main hall with a smile growing wide; while the other watched the rain fall during a quiet ride home, frustrated and jaw clenched.

Nora took care to drive slowly. Getting home quickly would only mean Valerie would march to her room. Nora let out a sigh. “Whether it’s me or your father, one of us is gonna make you talk about this. So-”

“What’s there to talk about? I’m upset and he’s upset, because we want different things. So we’re taking a break. Simple as that.” Valerie leaned against the cold glass.

“And what is it exactly that you want?” Nora asked. She was given no answer. Not that she was expecting one. “I love you, but if you don’t know the answer yourself then how can you expect Nick to not upset you? Life is like any sport you play. Gotta know the rules if you wanna do well. Only way to figure that out is knowing yourself.”

“I know myself pretty well.” Valerie huffed.

“Really?” Nora dragged out. “So tell me, do you like Nick, romantically?”

“No.” She said instinctively.

If Val could see Nora’s face then she would’ve been upset that she was rolling her eyes, not believing her daughter. “Okay, but just so you know, taking a break is not what most friends say about another.”

Valerie’s eyes widened. She turned to her mother to see her focused on the road like she hadn’t said a word. Val went back to looking at the window. “Good to know.” Valerie controlled the urge to huff. Talking to Ren might’ve been less painful.

xxxx

Nick walked into Summer’s room to find it sisterless and a little cold. “Guess she’s not home yet.” He closed the door behind him as he went further in. Nick made sure to keep the light off but turned on the heater. A cold room was the last thing this night needed. His chill hadn’t kicked in all this time so Nick had no real reason to worry about Shiva, yet his nerves would feel better actually seeing Summer come home safely. Pulling up a chair to sit in may have been a bit much but he did it anyway. Overbearing or not, Shiva would never be a subject he’d take lightly. Not like he had in the past when he was younger, naive of the danger that thing had. He could his body ache at the thought of it. Pain fades and the body heals, but it also remembers. Not like he needed a reminder. Not when the memories rear their ugliness often in his dreams.

A scroll rang loudly, bringing Nick out of the dark thoughts. He reached in his pocket to see it was in fact Summer who was calling.He wasted no time answering. “Where are you? I thought you’d be back by now?”

“That didn’t sound like hello.” Summer grumbled. “Relax, I'm close by. I actually called to ask for a favor. You’re home right?”

“Yes?”

“Cool. Can you open my window?

Nick walked over to her window and opened it. In the distance he could spot his sister and Eliza outside the gate from the right side. “Done. What-”

“How’d you do that so fast? Were you already in my room!? You aren’t snooping are you!?” She yelled.

“Quiet before you get caught. No, I wasn’t snooping. Pretty sure whatever secrets this room holds is one that would scar me. Though I’m curious about your journal, wherever you hid this time. Perhap under your nightstand?”

“Do you really want to rummage around a young woman's nightstand?” Summer could hear her brother let out an overtop gagging noise. “Grow up.”

“Say it to my face. You better hurry before I decide to close this and watch you hit the glass like a pigeon.”

“Fine, ya baby.” Summer hung up. “Thanks for walking me home, as well as helping me stay dry.” She looked up to see the small dome of water floating over her from Eliza’s magic.

“Exactly what was the plan if I had said no or not shown up at all?”

“Glyphs aren’t just for platforming and dust ya know? Not that it matters. I knew I’d see you tonight.”

Eliza scoffed, “Tah! That confident in your predictions about your brother?”

“Well yes, but that’s not it. It’s not a secret you practice at the pier. It’s also terrible luck on your part you almost shot a captain with a bolt of lightning. One time.”

“W-What!? B-but how would-”

“Is it a Marigold thing to be attracted to my family like a magnet? That captain is my cousin. He says your aim could use work. Bye!” Summer made glyphs to trampoline over the gate and platform through the air and through her window.”

Eliza couldn’t believe it. Why was this her life!? It had to be a joke. Atlas or Mantle, you’re bound to be in Schnee territory. It would’ve been fine if she wasn’t practicing moves to fight one! Now she needed a new training spot. Who knows what they might now. “Damnit, now Nick’s offer is even more to my best interest!”

“Sup bro. How was your date?” The rock n’ roll twin kicked off her shoes and took the black wig off before falling backwards onto her bed.

“Well Valerie was at the front awhile ago.”

Summer sat up. “Okay, that’s not what I expected. Did I miss a fight? No wait, I’m pretty sure I’d hear Veronica scream bloody murder because there’s no way her dress would stay flaw-” her rambling was cut short when Nick suddenly sat beside her and fell on her lap. “Woah. Hey, are you still sick!?”

“No, just tired. The past week has been a little...draining. To be honest I don’t think I even have the energy to shower right now.”

“Well you probably smell better than me right now so I’m not complaining.”

“How was the rave?”

“Fun. Got Eliza to dance a little. The crowd worshipped my performance.” She chuckled.

“What did you sing?”

“Nothing special. A few Linkin Park songs; an experimental original. Oscar thought it would be a good idea to take a few of my journal entries and vent it out through music.”

“Hmm, anything you’ll share to your actual fan base, or me?”

Summer looked at her ceiling to let out a composed sigh. “I don’t think I’m quite ready, or the song for that matter. It and myself are...a work in progress. Sorry.”

“It’s okay. Just know your fans think you can’t do wrong and there’s no world where I won’t support you. Family and all that.”

“Love you too.” Summer patted his head. “Sorry if I’ve been causing you trouble. Well, more than usual. Tomorrow is a new day.”

“That’s the spirit. Push yourself but not too hard. That’s my territory. Speaking of which, I’ve been racking my brain with ideas. You can talk to Shiva in that headspace whenever you like right?” He felt her hand stop. Nick looked up to see Summer look apprehensive.

“I can...but it’s not a thing I look to do. Plus tonight has been good. I really don’t want that to-”

“Summer, do you trust me?”

Nick’s words were calm and real. Summer didn’t know what he had in mind. It wasn’t like Nick to invite danger. Her eyes looked to the floor to the orange glow of her heater. Like usual it appeared that her brother had already taken strides for her and everyone’s sake. Just how far would he go, ever making herself feel like she’s at a stand still? Maybe tomorrow could start today. Just a little bit.

��What’s this idea of yours?” She said cautiously.

“Nothing too crazy. You’re just gonna take a page out of Veronica’s playbook.”

xxxxx

You would think a person would know what goes on in their head. Unfortunately, that’s hardly ever the case. Summer never got a full understanding of what went on upstairs in her mind. Then again that would only make sense. She was in therapy after all. Though no amount of emotional talking could explain why her headspace imagery was inconsistent at times. A void of nothingness, her own room, those were the usual shapes that took place. However, this time she found herself back at the frozen lake. Going back and triggering an episode must’ve left a lasting impression. At least her trauma brought variety. The only separation from the real place was the ice ceiling and a distinct lack of cold nipping at her skin. Her psyche though, it was definitely feeling something.

She began walking through the white hell of her own making until she found her target, Shiva. The being was skating across the lake like how Summer once did. “Shiva.” Summer called out.

The woman of ice and snow looked over, surprised. She stopped right in the middle of the lake. “Well, well, well, come to properly thank me? You’d be in a grimm’s stomach by now if it wasn’t for me. You and that idiot girl. Tell me, is she in pain from our encounter?”

“I’m not here to thank you or chitchat.” Summer bluntly stated. “This is an in and out thing.”

“I’ll take that as a no then? Pity. I wouldn’t mind seeing her cry and despair. I bet her tears are uglier than yours. Though I'll say that this look you have going on isn’t gross. Honestly it helps to see you better in this place. You’re always so pale when you’re talking to me. Afraid I might hurt you?” A smirk spread across her face. “Oh I do hate you so.”

“Feeling is mutual. I came here to tell you that from this point on things are gonna change.”

“Pfft, heard that before. You’re all talk.”

“Am I?” Summer reached her hand out. Right before her eyes, the shape of a shovel formed. Hiding her surprise, she focused on Shiva’s own shock. “My mind, my rules. If I can subconsciously make this hell then I can shape it to an extent. Summer tossed the shovel at Shiva for her to catch. “Keep that safe for me.” Summer’s body began to slowly fade from this space.

“And what exactly is this for?”

“Your grave. Feel free to dig it yourself.” Her final words before disappearing completely while witnessing a smug smirk vanish before her eyes. Right as she faded, Summer could hear one last remark.

“We’ll see who buries who.”

Summer opened her eyes to find herself back in her room. Good, she hadn’t moved an inch. “Well I’ve thoroughly pissed her off, but it actually felt good to be the one harassing her. Thank Ni- huh?” Summer failed to realize she’s been talking to herself. Nick was fast asleep already! “Unbelievable. What if I would’ve messed up?”

“Zzzzzz.”

“Quite the convincing answer.” Summer returned to rubbing his head. He felt a little warm but nothing serious. Taking breaks needed to be at the top of his list from now on. Only way that would happen is if things weren’t hectic. It was time to step up. “I’ll do right by you. I promise. Just...give me a little more time.”

Her eyes became heavy. It appears the day’s events weighed on her more than she realized. Both twins fell into slumber there for the entire night, finally getting some rest.

[elmidol]

Error: Program Not Found - Eleven (NSFW)

Summary:  You are in charge of programming the droids that work most closely with both General Hux and Kylo Ren. Unbeknownst to you, each of these two men have it in their heads that your relationship extends beyond the workplace. This causes things to escalate quickly when your two apparently secret boyfriends compare notes on their respective partner who is far too similar for their liking.

Read on AO3

Chapter Warnings: sexting; masturbation

“The world is full of magical things patiently waiting for our wits to grow sharper.” - Eden Phillpotts

 Eleven: Golden

 Eddard was entrusted with caring for TeeArr during the meeting with the First Order supplier. He was one of the few you knew for a fact would be capable of handling the droid’s personality quirks without it interfering with his duties. As for the MSE droid, you had temporarily disabled it until your return. This was the safest route given its glitches and previous programming errors. Along with General Hux, Kylo Ren, Aelin, and you, the three other members to join were among the top in their fields. It did not escape your notice that Captain Phasma was absent and that there was not a representative for the stormtroopers. The issues regarding subpar equipment that the stormtroopers faced were near identical enough to what Kylo Ren and First Order officers had dealt with. Thus their presence would have been redundant. Regardless there were a handful of stormtrooper guards that were assigned to the ship and officers, although this was nothing different than what was to be expected.

 The ride on the Command Shuttle had been somber, limited conversation passing amongst the group. Kylo Ren did not utter a single word, whereas General Hux confirmed that you were comfortable in your seat before speaking with the officer seated on his left. Aelin dozed off and on. He leaned his head on your shoulder during sleep, an action that caused you to smile and relax as well. Though you did not lose consciousness, you were able to get ample rest and thus feel refreshed once the Command Shuttle had landed on the planet’s surface.

 Four humans met the entourage that you were a part of to offer salutations from their superiors prior to providing the location of the rooms that had been made ready for the duration of the stay. There were two or three beds per room aside from the two single-bed accommodations that were naturally for General Hux and Kylo Ren. Aelin was quick in offering for you to bunk with him. Grateful for this, you accepted with a smile and headed with him towards the room while one of the four humans--they had not given their names--led you once more. It was unnecessary and, in your opinion, bothersome that you were not allowed to walk alone. The rooms all shared a common area that was secluded from the remainder of the building and wherein all members of the First Order could speak.

 It likely has surveillance, you thought, lips pinching together at the sense of violation that rolled through you. Properly private communications would take place via messages on datapads, although this could well be accomplished in the common room to offer body language as an additional form of communication.

 “Do you think they will charge us for room service?” Aelin asked after his stomach growled rather noisily. You blinked while considering his question. Those hosting the meeting were being generous with providing a place to stay without charging the First Order; they were buttering you all up, however you sincerely doubted that they would spend more credits than necessary to secure the deal. This was about profit.

 You shrugged. “I would ask General Hux if food has entered any of their discussions.” Aelin gave an exaggerated sigh that had you rolling your eyes and shaking your head. He could be theatrically dramatic when he wanted.

 After you deposited the bag that you had brought with you for the duration of your stay on the floor by the bedside table, you knelt in front of it and began to rummage through your belongings. This setting allowed one to dress in nonstandard clothing while not in the meeting. There was no way that you were going to give up the chance; it was a rare occurrence since you had started working for the First Order. You selected a shirt and lounge bottoms, bundling them into your arms and then walking into the bathroom to change. Aelin had already plopped down on the bed he would be using for the stay. He had discovered a menu on the small round dining table that was tucked off in a corner of the room. You trusted him to learn if food was to be included as well as pick a location to eat if it was not.

 Once dressed, you settled down on your bed with your datapad, which had been blinking to indicate a new message. Aelin was working on acquiring more information regarding food since thus far he had been offered mixed messages. He left the room just as you rested your head against the bed’s headboard. Your fingers worked quickly on typing in the passcode for your device; you had added this as a precaution now that you were on planet and away from the increased security offered by the First Order when on their bases or ships. The majority of your project notes were locked away with your other possessions rather than being brought to this planet. When the message was brought it, the sender was anonymous. You furrowed your brow at that. Few possessed your contact information on the server.

 With a roll of your shoulders, you decided to play along with whoever had sent the message upon reading its contents.

 [There is time to play between work hours. Can you guess my favorite beverage?]

 Your tongue flicked along your lips, wetting them, and you narrowed your eyes while contemplating your answer. If this was General Hux, it would be tarine tea. If it was Kylo Ren, you were unsure. Worse, if it was someone else completely, you did not want to participate in this game. You toyed with your lips, pinching them between three fingers, tapping them, and at last releasing them. A light clucking noise issued forth as you pushed your tongue against the roof of your mouth. There was no reason that you had to give an immediate answer, however you were curious just how swiftly the individual would respond in turn.

 [I was debating catching up on some R&R between work hours. A pop quiz may not fall into that category.]

 It was not an outright rejection and should serve its purpose of deterring the individual from contacting you further unless they were serious. In which case your belief that either General Hux or Kylo Ren were behind this would be more substantiated. There was no shying away from the thrill that developed at the thought of flirtatiously messaging with either of those men. You were more in your element over the messaging system, more in control, and the ability to duck out of it should things prove too intense was less awkward than dismissing yourself when face to face. The relaxed atmosphere of the planet, of this room that you were sharing with Aelin, further allowed you to feel at ease with this idea. You found yourself dreading proof that it was neither General Hux or Kylo Ren that had messaged you.

 Aelin called through on your comm unit while you waited for a reply. The sound of its chime had caused your limbs to jerk towards your stomach, and you rolled your eyes as you recovered from having been startled. “Still unsure if food is included and I’m famished. I’ll bring back something for the both of us. You can pitch in for breakfast.”

 “That sounds just fine,” you replied whilst tapping your finger against your datapad. Another message had come in, albeit from a different sender. In place of Anonymous the sender was Unknown. You squinted. “What is the most popular beverage on this planet?” There was a pregnant pause before Aelin offered the response of a tea that was made from an indiginous fruit. “Would you mind bringing me one?” There was no question as to why you wanted it, only an affirmation that he would purchase the drink if it was readily available wherever he went for food.

 Disconnecting from the conversation on the comm link, you brought up the message from the new sender. It was similar in tone to the one from Anonymous, and you considered that they might be one person rather than two.

 [Our hosts have ensured periods of idleness. How shall we indulge ourselves?]

 It would not be difficult to copy the message that you had sent to Anonymous as the reply fit this message as well. The idea that it was lazy prevented you from resorting to that. You were touchy on such matters ever since you had to endure being tested by Kylo Ren when it came to the training droids. Bitterness threatened to flood through your veins at the memory, and you shoved those thoughts aside, opting to instead focus on the message and what reply you would compose. It would have to be similar to the previous one, you thought. Not an outright rejection, but also not something completely warm and inviting. You puckered your lips forward into a sort of fish-faced expression while beginning to type.

 [The lapses in work offer opportunities for rest and brainstorming. Responding to questions is not high on my list of activities.]

 You bit down on your bottom lip. That text was rather rude in tone. You debated deleting it then shrugged and sent the message. Not two seconds later you received a new message from Anonymous.

 [Forgive me, I had not realized that I would be intruding on your rest.]

 The line was afforded a sarcastic tone in your mind as you read it through twice. It was suggestive of either man still, which did frustrate you. They were similar but different. This was another motivation for engaging at all; your conflict could be settled with interactions that had nothing to do with work. There was no risk of kissing them, of them kissing you. Your next response would have to be a little warmer unless you wanted the individual on the other side to end communications.

 [There is a high probability that I am hangry, which leads to increased irritability when questioned on beverages. The most popular drink on this planet is a fruit tea, did you know that?]

 You clicked the send button and preempted the incoming reply from Unknown by immediately afterwards returning to the inbox.

 [What if the inquiries revolve around the projects that have you brainstorming?]

 This individual was tenacious and not easily swayed. It was nice, you thought. You needed someone who could deal with you on good days and bad. Your workload oftentimes increased without proper notice, and as such you were stretched thin mentally and emotionally. Until recently, you had never snapped at either General Hux or Kylo Ren. That would have been entirely unprofessional. Perhaps suicidal in the case of Kylo Ren. You suppressed a giggle at the thought; it had been an electrifying experience in the training room that day. Your lips tingled at the memory. Next your throat as your mind conjured up the other man that had recently kissed you.

 [That might be helpful. What if all projects aren’t work related?]

 You curled your toes at the thought of potential responses to that. As time dragged on you were realizing that you wanted to flirt more openly with Kylo Ren and General Hux on this messaging system. You wanted them to say something that would take your breath away. You could reciprocate here where you were safely hidden behind a screen. Maybe the two of them realized that already. Perhaps that was why they had reached out in this way. It was them, wasn’t it? The idea that it was anyone else made your stomach churn. If it was, though, you could pretend. How stupid would that be, you thought as you again rolled your eyes. You did not want anyone to catfish you. Did not want to emotionally open up in this way only to be hurt.

 The responses arrived at nearly the same time as one another. You stared at them in the inbox without opening either. Was the same man--person in general--behind both accounts? If was the two of them, separately, messaging you, which did you prefer? Enjoying both was such a problem. You shoved away that negative line of thinking and opened both messages, each taking up half the screen.

 A: [Yes, I had heard. The tea itself is said to be rather sweet. Is that something you prefer?]

 U: [Are any of the non-work related projects to do with self-improvement? Your physicality, perhaps.]

 Two very different responses that were both flirtatious in your opinion. You glanced at your comm link then the chrono that was in the room. Aelin could return at any moment. Your mouth watered at the thought of food. You did not salivate any less upon looking once more at the messages. You readjusted your posture so that the screen of your datapad was not easily visible to anyone who might come through the door.

 To A: [I will, hopefully, learn soon enough if it is something I prefer. Are you opposed to sweets?]

 To U: [Should I be offended that you find my body in need of improvements?]

 Your heart stuttered in your chest at the thought of how they might respond. The questions you posed would hopefully assist you in determining which man was which. You were under the assumption that Anonymous was General Hux and Unknown was Kylo Ren. That being said, you clearly had a skewed perception of how they interacted with others given that you had not known they considered themselves in a relationship with you. It would be just your luck to have their identities swapped.

 A: [I am not opposed to them, nor do I seek them out. I eat to sustain myself. If you recall, the First Order is not rich in food beyond basic provisions.]

 U: [I was leading into the benefits of sex.]

 Your jaw dropped as you read the reply from Unknown. This individual was a lot more forthcoming than you had believed either of them would be. Heat seeped into your cheeks, and you found yourself pressing your legs together. How far were you willing to go with these chats? At one point in time you had been engaged in a long distance relationship. Sexting, masturbating over video and/or voice chats, you had done it.

 To A: [I will have to indulge quite a bit on this trip between meetings then.]

 To U: [That is quite forward of you. I am less concerned about insult than I was before.]

 The next message you received was voice-based from Aelin to inform you that he was waiting for the food to be prepared. The delay in his return would be approximately half an hour. Your heart stuttered in your chest here. Licking your lips, you decided to not wait for a response from either sender. Some might consider your behavior scandalous. It hardly mattered when they proved that they would gossip no matter your true actions or intentions. There was no way you were going to let that stop you from enjoying yourself here.

 To A: [If you were able to have your way with me, what would you do?]

 To U: [What position would you want me in during sex?]

 It felt like all air had been siphoned from your lungs the minute both of those messages were sent. A shiver ran down your spine. This was not regret so much as anticipation. You waited with bated breath for the answers. Each second that ticked by drove you insane. It was counting down the time you had left until Aelin showed up. Maybe counting the minutes then hours that you received no response at all. Would you get written up? Be rightfully accused of abusing the messaging system?

 A: [I would restrain your arms behind your back while you were on your knees, my cock in your mouth.] You slipped under the covers, bending your knees and parting your legs, to give you some form of privacy should Aelin enter before you were done. Your fingers danced along the hem of your bottoms. [I would fuck your mouth, but I wouldn’t cum in it. I would shove you onto your back, keep your arms pinned. Open up that tight cunt of yours with my fingers and tongue. Taste how wet I make you.] Swallowing thickly, you slid two fingers along your slit, feeling your body responding to the words you were reading as much as your own touch. [Then I’d fuck you so hard you would barely be able to stand. You’ll feel so empty when I’m not inside of you.]

 “Fuck.” You dragged your juices up towards your clit, circling it, letting it slip away from your touch before pinning it between two fingers.

 U: [Bent over the table so that I can fuck you while those annoying senators and businessmen watch. You’ll be an incoherent mess as you cum on my cock.]

 The second message had been shorter, yes, but it had given you as vivid an image as the first. You closed your eyes while picturing both scenarios. Moving back and forth between the two. General Hux restraining your wrists with a belt, his cock down your throat as you moaned around him.

 You moved your fingers into yourself, thrusting them slowly, curling and uncurling just the tips.

 Next it was Kylo Ren using the Force to keep your arms in place. You would be completely unable to move as he held onto your head with both of his hands and pounded into your mouth.

 You added a third finger while imagining, in alteration, the two men bended you over the table during the meeting. All faces were blurs, the very idea almost too much for you though it made you hot all over. Arousal flooded through you in electrifying waves. You slid your other hand under the sheets to toy with your clit without removing the first from inside your cunt. You fucked yourself harder, picturing them. Their thick cocks inside of you, your walls clenching around them. Words of praise spilling from your lips in sloppy, incoherent whines. You gasped aloud, rolling onto your front, onto your knees, and burying your face into your pillow, your fingers moving faster and faster. You could feel yourself growing closer. Could feel the scream of pleasure that threatened to erupt.

 Darkness crept along the corners of your vision, your eyelids fluttering repeatedly as the dam of pleasure broke and you spilled around your fingers. You moaned loudly into your pillow then bit down on it. Muffled yourself as best you could, riding out your orgasm, rocking your fingers against your clit to prolong it. Your body trembled at the additional stimulation. All the while your mind kept the pictures of General Hux and Kylo Ren fucking you playing and replaying. The memories of how their mouths felt on you. You collapsed against the mattress, rolled onto your side. Curled enough to locate your datapad, which continued to display both messages. It also showed the time. Aelin would be returning any minute.

 Feeling only partially satisfied, you went into the bathroom to clean yourself up. After returning to the room, you lifted your datapad and typed out a quick message that you copied and pasted for both.

 [Thank you. I needed that.]

 The heat in your body had not fully abated when you exited out of the messaging center. There was no more time to recover, however; you could hear Aelin’s footsteps on the other side of the door. Could smell the delicious food that he had brought with him. You hoped that Anonymous and Unknown would send you more messages while you were on the planet for the meeting.

[cobradoesmcyt]

Black Rose (3/4)

Here comes part 3! Filed with “Death, forgiveness and rebirth”!

Bdubs walked into Idea's warehouse at a leisurely pace, Keralis just a few steps behind him. They had just finished a wonderful breakfast, made my Keralis with the help of Grian's big garden, and they couldn’t be any more confident. They'd ask Xisuma now, because if they delayed it nothing good would happen.

Sharing one last look they walked in, happily greeting Xisuma as they entered. They still don't know if the admin was a part of the Grian was like this, but they mostly lived by the "Innocent until proven guilty" thing so they had no reason to not be nice to him.

"Hi guys! Are you ready for today?" Asked Xisuma, a smile hiding under his helmet as he talked to his two friends.

"Actually, can we ask you something before we start?"

X looked at them curiously, but nodded his head non the less.

"Is what Iskall talked about when he went to new Hermitville really true?" Questioned Bdubs, he hoped that his lying skills were good enough to fool the admin, if not they'd be in a lot of trouble moral vise.

"What exactly was he talking about?" Asked Xisuma calmly, if not a bit stiffly.

"Grian, and how he disappeared two weeks ago and something about wither roses." Said Keralis flippantly, pretending that he didn't really care to remember.

"Ah, that," bit out X, fingers tapping together anxiously, "Yes it's true, we still haven't been able to find him."

"You'll find him eventually!" Said Bdubs faux happily, swinging an arm around his friend's shoulder, "Any idea why he ran away though? Maybe we know places he could be if we know his motives?"

Xisuma looked away from the two of them, guilt shining in his eyes. They deserved to know, he just didn't want to admit that he'd failed one of the people on his server so much that they ran away. But with one glance at Bdubs' curious eyes and Keralis' encouraging smile (both of which were actually mostly true, and not fake) he broke, "I don't know exactly why, but from what I've gathered from Iskall and Ren, the two people who have put themselves fully into finding Grian and apologizing, we poked fun at him without checking to make sure he was ok with it. There's a lot more stuff to probably, but that's the thing we are the most sure about."

The two nodded along to what he was saying, knowing that his words were true (you know, since they live with Grian now and all that). "But why did you wait two weeks to start looking?" Asked Keralis, the daunting question finally being asked.

"We didn't know he was missing until two nights ago when Iskall told us at the server meeting."

They hadn't been at that server meeting since Bdubs had been sick and both Grian and Keralis wanted to stay and make sure he recovered without a hitch, which he did. And Bdubs was thankful he hadn't gone, he would have probably punched Iskall if he'd said that in front of him.

Whilst X had been talking Bdubs had been secretly talking to Grian, telling the short man what was being said and how the admin was talking. After that last tidbit of information he sent Grian a text asking "Do you want to see X? Because we can bring him right now if your ok with it, he's really shaken about all of this"

A yes from Grian arrived a few moments later. Now he just had to get X to New Hermitville, which is actually the easiest part yet it seemed, because all they had to do was say that they had something important for him in the village and he followed along.

As they approached the gates Bdubs saw a badge with a wither rose attached to it. He walked over and detached it before quickly jogging back and handing it to Xisuma. The Void looked from the badge to him with confusion.

"You'll understand soon." Winked Bdubs, leading the admin towards Grian's little house which resides at the outskirts of the village.

They walked up to the house, but instead entering the wood building they walked around the house to the back. Xisuma was confused as to what could possibly be at the back, what was it that they even had to show him? Just as he was about to ask he turned the corner and froze.

They had just entered a garden filled with yellow, pink and blue flowers, there was also two cats and a dog resting on a grass patch near the back door. But that wasn't what made him freeze, it was instead the person in said garden.

Grian stood facing them, a small unsure smile on his face. He was gently holding a spring crocus in his hands, "Hi X."

"Grian?" Breathed the admin in shock, "You've been here all this time? And what happened to your face, and clothes too?"

"Sit down Xisuma, we have a lot to talk about."

And so Grian explained everything to him, about his feelings, the Hermit’s actions and his time with Bdubs and Keralis. By the end X wanted nothing more than to hug the small man in front of him, "Oh god Grian, we didn't realize. God-I'm so sorry!"

The violet eyed man observed the admin for a while, eyes narrowed in thought. He eventually gave a nod and walked up and gave the flower in his hands to Xisuma, "This is my answer."

X took the flower gently, not wanting to harm it and get Grian mad at him, "Uh, not to be rude-but how is this your answer?"

The dirty blond giggled at the question, "It's a spring crocus. It isn't just a pretty flower, it has a meaning. That meaning is my answer to your requests for forgiveness."

Xisuma seemed to hold the white and purple even more gently in his arms at that, as if it was the most precious thing in the universe. And at this moment, that was kind of true.

He looked up at Grian with thankful eyes, hoping that his expression could be seen through his visor, "Thank you. Is it ok if I come back tomorrow? That should give me enough time to look up the meaning of it."

"You can," said Grian, giving the admin a small smile, "It was good to see you X, have a good day." And then he walked back into his house, dog and cats following him back in.

Bdubs patted his admin friend on the back, "Was this important enough?" X could do nothing more than nod, unable to form words, "Good. Now do you want to go back and have the meeting, or do you want to look into the flower immediately?"

"I think we can skip a meeting." Said the helmet wearing Hermit, eyes not leaving the flower in his hands. He was about to walk away when he remembered the badge he was given, he took it out and showed it to the other two Idea members, "Hey, what's with this?"

Bdubs didn't even have to look to know what he was talking about, "It's Grian's crest. He chose it because what was cooler to have as a symbol then the thing that almost was your demise?"

Xisuma clutched the badge in his hand, the black painted metal heavy in his hand with meaning. He left for his base soon after that.

As soon as he left Keralis and Bdubs walked into Grian's house. Said man was sitting at the table, playing with the same badge that Xisuma now has. He put down the metal object once they got in and offered the two a smile.

"I'm curious, what did that flower mean?" Asked Keralis, arms crossed over the table.

"It represents our heart or soul, which blooms when someone we love forgives us. This is me forgiving him, because he hasn't done anything to me directly except forget to ask if I was ok with the few jokes he made." Answered Grian softly, fingers moving to trace the petals of the lotus flower in the bowl of water on the table.

"That's nice. Is he the only one who's forgiven? Or is there anyone else who also is?"

Grian continued to gently caress the pastel pink petals of the lotus as he answered Keralis, "Ren is also forgiven, he never made a lot of the jokes. Python and TFC are also forgiven, but I'm not as close to those two as I am with Re."

"Re?" Asked Bdubs with an eyebrow raised, smile playing at his lips. 

"It's a little joke between me and Ren," smiled Grian, "He's Re and I'm Ri, I don't know why it stuck, but it did."

"Oh, that's so sweet!" Cooed Bdubs, the rave head grinning all the while, "So how are you telling the other four?"

The dirty blond stopped tracing the petals, his hand instead moving to tap on the polished wood of the spruce table, "I'll send letters to TFC and Python, with flowers included of course. And I'll invite Ren down here to talk."

"Sounds like a great idea!" Grinned Bdubs, "Now can you come help me pick out some new flowers for the castle? It's looking a bit too copper and white for me."

"Sure!" Chirped the dirty blond florist, "Just tell me what you feel you're looking for and I'll give you what you need!"

And like that everything went back to normal. Of course nothing was ever normal here, but the peace was back at least. And soon would many friendships also be back, or at least be on the mend.