#round 1 million lol

[toastsnaffler]

I mostly just scroll thru blog subs when im on mobile bc I follow too many ppl on here so I add mutuals etc there n then turn off notifs so it's like the creme de la creme of the dash anyway if u see me in ur notes more its bc I forgor to add some of u on there until recently sorry 😭😭

[dazed--xx]

SKZ!Reactions: It Was All a Bet II (Hyung Line)

Part 1 Maknae Line Masterlist

A/N: I put this out as like a little birthday present for myself lol but yeah, i hope you guys enjoy. a lot of you have requested this and have been waiting on the edge of your seat for this so here it is. i hope it lives up to you guys expectations.

Chan:

A series of rapid knocks slammed against your door; you roll your eyes from your position on the couch not moving a single inch to open the door. Turning up the volume on your t.v you hear your phone ring, seeing Chan’s contact name on your screen you snort to yourself. Another round of knock’s bang against your door. “Y/N, I know you’re home! Please just talk to me!” Chan pleads on the other side of the door. You shake your head to yourself, continuing to ignore him. You turn the volume up on your t.v. again drowning Chan out as you try to ignore the ache in your chest. The betrayal you felt beyond measure as you remember the way he laughed as he jeered at his friends about his win almost being guaranteed. How could he? You thought he loved you. You believed him every time he kissed you and held you close. The nights you spent wrapped in each other’s arms felt real, you couldn’t describe the pain you felt as he uttered those devastating words. It had been 4 days since you heard it, you couldn’t handle opening that door and seeing him after he took your heart and smashed it to a million pieces. You sniffle as you wipe a stray tear flowing down your cheek.

“No…Don’t cry over him…you’re not some weak heroine….” You tell yourself as the calls and knocks come to a stop. The sound of your door opening makes you jump in a panic, your eyes widen as you turn to see Chan entering your apartment. You shake your head as he slowly enters, his head hung low as he closes the door behind him. His eyes meet yours and you notice all the tension in him leave his body he reaches toward you, a desperate look on his face as he strides across the room toward you. “Babe--No.” you cut him off monotonously as you look away from him.

“Get out.” You demand.

A look of horror spreads across his features as he stares at you. A painfilled gasp is released from his throat “Y-You wont even let me explain?” His voice cracks as his eyes fill with tears. “There’s nothing to explain…. everything we had was based on a lie” You counter coldly. He shakes his head as he steps toward you, his heart cracking as you take a step back “N-No..you really misunderstood. Please…. please let me explain…l-let’s just sit, a-and talk. I promise its not what you think” You shake your head. “It doesn’t matter…. —I asked you out before the bet was made” He cuts you off desperately. “I-Im an ass for making the bet but, I never asked you out because of a bet I promise you that.” He continues nervously. Your head whips toward him, your eyebrows scrunch together in confusion as he explains “The bet was about the length of our relationship. I swear. Im not saying I was right to make the bet, but the guys kept saying that we wouldn’t last three months. My schedule is hectic and unpredictable so they kept saying that you’d feel forgotten about and that we wouldn’t even be able to make three months. So, I just made the bet and yes, I was stupid, but I love you. You know that I love you and I would never do something so terrible. I made a mistake a huge mistake, but I promise you that I love you and I won’t let my mistake ruin what we have…” He states as his right hand caresses your cheek as his left encases your waist pulling you into his lean frame, you turn your face away from his as he leans in closer to you.

“How long did you give us then?”

“What?”

“How long did you bet we’d be together?”

Chan smirks at you flirtatiously as he leans in close to your face brushing his lips over yours “I tried to say for the rest of our lives, but Minho talked me down to a year” You blush as he presses his lips against yours softly. “I’m so sorry, I was an ass, and I was so wrong but please…. don’t break up with me, okay? I felt like I couldn’t breathe when I felt like I was losing you. I love you” He pouts as he pulls you into his chest his arms wrapping around you firmly. “You’re still on thin ice…. but I love you too” You scold as out look up at him, pecking his lips softly.

Minho:

You stared out the window watching Minho pace in front of your job for the nth time while he contemplated coming inside. You watch him as he lifts his phone from his side as he begins to type out a message before deciding not to and running his hand through his hair. Your heart ached for him as you noticed the distressed look on his face, but you were much too frustrated with him to have sympathy for him. With a heavy annoyed sigh, you make your way from behind the counter and stride toward your ex. Pushing the front door open you glare at him “At this point, this could be considered stalking….” You scold. Minho’s head perks up as his movement’s halts, the moment he notices you he rushes toward you; his arms wrapping around you as he pulls you against him his legs giving way as he holds onto your waist. His body trembles as you feel your shirt growing wet as loud desperate sobs erupt through his chest as he buries his face in your shirt. “Im sorry, don’t break up with me. Im so sorry” He pleads. You try to shove him off softly.

“No! Please! Im sorry! Im so sorry please”

“Lee Minho, get ahold of yourself.”

 He shakes his head, “No. ill beg and plead and do anything I have to so that you can forgive me, and we can be together. I’ll explain, you’ll be mad for a while but—but…” He stares up at you with a pleading pitiful look “…we can figure it out. We can talk about this; we can work this out. I can fix this; I’ll do anything to fix this s-so please don’t break up with me. Please at least give me a chance to fix this…. I need one chance” You stare at him in disbelief “Why so you can finish your year?” A look of heartbreak forms on his features. “I don’t care about that…Y/N…h-how could you say that? How could you ask me that?” His voice cracks, as more tears form in his eyes as he stares down at his lap. “Y-You must think I’m this disgusting person now…. Fuck!” he cries. “Minho, this is my job. This isn’t the place for this.”

“Where else could I do this? You refused to see me this past week. You won’t answer my calls—you don’t have time for this. Where did you suddenly pull all this free time out your ass? Move on Minho. I found out about your bet to date me” You cut him off harshly. He finally brings himself to his feet, his hands encasing your shoulders. “Does that matter? Like truly?” He asks “Why does it matter? We are together, we care about each other, it doesn’t change the things we’ve been through this year. So why does it matter how we started?”

“Because its all a lie!”

“I have never lied to you!”

“Our entire relationship is a lie!”

Minho freezes as he stares at you with a painful expression “Y-You don’t believe that I care about you? Y/N…. I—you said I was tolerable, and that this year was a breeze because of it” You cut him off. He winces at the mention of his message. “I-I said the wrong thing. T-the guys would know what I meant. I didn’t mean to send you that message, and when I realized I did…. Y/N I promise you I never wanted you to find out this way. I was going to tell you, in person and beg you to understand and forgive me. But my feelings for you are real. I love you and I care about you, and this is fucking breaking me right now. so please, j-just give me another chance to show you that you mean more than anything else in this world to me.” You stand there for a moment as you contemplate, you notice your boss staring at you with a disapproving look from inside. You give a sigh, “This really isn’t the time…. I get out at 8. We can do dinner or something and talk I guess” you state. Minho’s eyes light up as he nods enthusiastically pressing his lips to your cheek. “T-thank you…You wont regret this.”

Changbin:

“Do you not know how to read or something?” You growl as Changbin stood in your private studio. Changbin stared at you with a pout on his lips. “It’s been two weeks Y/N…” You shrug “Wish it had been longer” You state as you shove past him and sit at your desk. “How much longer are you going to punish me? I already apologized. I’ve been calling, texting you. What can I do to get you to talk to me again?” He whimpers as he stares at you sadly. “I don’t want to talk to you. Its that simple, Seo Sunbae-nim.” You state professionally. A look of horror and disbelief paint Changbin’s expression “Don’t—Don’t do that… don’t put distance between us like that.” He pleads. You shake your head “If you’re not here to discuss your next project I’d suggest you leave” You state as you focus on your computer.

“I-Im not leaving. Not until we talk about this.”

“Oomph, seems like you’re going to be moving in here. How fun….”

“Why are you being like this? Why can’t we just talk about this? I already said I’m sorry—yeah, right before you begged me to pretend, I don’t know about the bet so you could win.” You cut him off with a look of disgust on your face. Changbin freezes in his place as he stares at the ground as guilt fills his stomach. “That wasn’t the reason…. I know that I said I needed the money and that it would be doing me a favor but, I was panicking, and I just said whatever came to my mind that I thought would get you to stay with me.” He confesses nervously. “Well, that’s just stupid…” You state as you continue to stare at the computer pulling up a file for a new rookie group you’ve been working with. “If that’s all, can you leave? Im going to be having a session soon.” You state monotonously. Changbin’s eyes well up with tears as he turns your chair around, dropping to his knees he stares up at you with pleading eyes. “Please, please forgive me. I was wrong to make a bet to date you. I would never do anything that terrible again, I would never betray your trust again. I’m so sorry and I really regret making the bet, but I don’t regret dating you. The only good thing to come out of something this stupid is our relationship and how you make me feel. I will do anything to make this better, I can give you time, I can give you space so you can be mad at me all you need. If you want to curse at me in the middle of the night because of the pain I’ve caused you, I’ll answer the call every time. I’ll be your friend if that’s what you want for now, but I need to know that I will have a chance one day to fix this. I can do that; I will do that. I care about you, and yes, this relationship started without me truly feeling for you the way you did for me, but it is the same now. we love each other and I know I can fix this, please give me a chance to. Please, I can be better—I will be better for you. Im so sorry” He begs, a heartbroken expression painted on his features as tears stream down his face. His voice cracked as he spoke, causing the walls you placed around the section of your heart that was filled with Changbin to come crashing down. You stare at him feeling a pitiful guilt at the pain you caused to the man you love.

“B-Binnie…” You whisper naturally. His head perks up as he stares at you hopefully. His hand caresses your cheek. “You don’t understand how sorry I am” he whispers as he leans in slowly, and hesitant. “Sorry can’t fix this…:

“No, but I can’t force you to forgive me and just say yes to staying together when I hurt you. I need you to know how terrible I feel, and I want to turn back time, so I didn’t make the stupid bet.”

“We would have never been together if you didn’t...” You state, Changbin shakes his head in denial “No, we are meant to be together. Even if you don’t forgive me now…. I’ll wait for you because there’s no one else meant for me. Even if I didn’t make that stupid bet, we would have ended up together eventually. You’re meant for me, and I’m meant for you….”

Hyunjin:

You roll your eyes, unamused as you exit your apartment and see Hyunjin standing on your porch as you make your way to your classes. He smiles at you brightly “Hey Babe” choosing to ignore him you brush past him, a monotonous look on your face as you make your way to your car. You resist the urge to look back and see his reaction. HA! Take that ‘Male Lead’ You snort to yourself mentally. Unlocking your car your eyes widen when Hyunjin pulls open the passenger door and takes a seat before you could enter the car. “The audacity…” You whisper under your breath. With a sigh, you open the back door pulling out your bag and opting to walk to the university instead. Shrugging the bag over your shoulder you begin making your way down your driveway. “Y/N, Are you serious right now?” Hyunjin groans in annoyance as he exits the car closing the passenger door behind him before he walks around the car pressing the lock button before closing the door. You continue walking as he rushes from behind you taking a hold of your forearm and halting your movements. “Fuck, don’t do this to me….” He whimpers “Talk to me, look at me, something please…” His voice cracks. You shake your head as you try to pull your arm out of his grasp. His grip grows a little tighter. “I’ll explain. We can talk about this.” He pleads.

You continue staring forward and bite your lip, so you don’t respond. “You’re killing me here…you know that?” He whimpers. “I told you, its just better for you to leave well enough alone….” You state coldly. “And I told you that I’m not giving up on you” Hyunjin counters. You shake your head “I’d rather you did. I won’t be helping you win your bet.” A pained scoff erupts from his throat “Is that why you think I’m here? That stupid fucking bet?!” He growls angrily. You nod, knowing that the bet probably wasn’t the reason, but you allowed the pettiness you felt in the pit in your stomach take over. “You don’t even know what the fucking bet was about!” He shouts angrily.

“Excuse me?”

“You. Don’t. Even. Know. What. The. Bet. Was. About.” He grits. Your eyebrows furrow as anger boils in your stomach “Do I need to? I heard enough. I know you made some bet to date me and would get 500 dollars after a year” You argue. “No. The bet was I would confess to you and prove that I was actually serious about you within a year because I had a habit of developing feelings for any girl that treated me like a fucking person instead of Hwang Hyunjin from Stray Kids. Im not some disgusting prick that would date a girl I have no interest in for fucking pocket change Y/N. it’s not like I need 500 dollars, if you didn’t know Im kinda doing well in my career.” He snaps. “I made the bet to prove to myself and the guys that I was actually serious about you. Was it stupid? Yes, but I won’t let you just sit there and say that I was fucking playing around with you when you’re the first girl I want to be serious with in a very long time.”

You stare at him in disbelief. Words not coming to you as you replay his explanation over and over in your mind. It felt like an eternity before you said anything. “That’s a stupid ass bet if I’m being honest” You state with an annoyed pout. “Oh, you thought I was smart?” Hyunjin jokes as he leans into you pulling you into a back hug as he rests his chin on your shoulder “Can you please give me another chance? I wont ruin this again. I won’t do anything that stupid again.” He pleads softly, you sigh “Please just give me sometime to think about it?” Hyunjin groans “Please? Baby, this is torture…if you weren’t going to forgive me, you wouldn’t be letting me anywhere near you right now.”

“So, you should have your answer then….” You state sarcastically.

“But I’m not sure if you forgave me if you don’t say you do….” He pouts.

You shrug as you pull yourself out of his arms and make your way to your car. “I got a test and I’ll be late, so I have to go.” Hyunjin follows behind you with a kicked puppy expression as you unlock your car once again. “Will I see you after your classes?” He questions sadly. You pull open the driver’s door taking a seat and rolling down the window as the engine roars to life. You wave Hyunjin to lean into your window, he complies with a sad pout. You press your lips to his cheek as you whisper “Depends on your schedule…” His cheeks heat up turning a bright crimson as his hand caresses the cheek you kissed. You wink at him as you reverse out of the driveway.

Taglist: @corrodedthorn n @lovesunshinefelix @lailac13 @moonchildlv @neyangi @hello-stranger24 @tamlinsfiddle @allyrarara @yangbbokari

[kanmom51]

Can you believe it's only been 5 weeks?

Feels like an eternity already.

In any case, tomorrow basic training ends and we might (or might not) hear where they are going to be assigned to.

One thing we do know is:

that they are going to be together.

Something that will definitely quieten the nerves.

I've kind of sworn off SM at the moment, after seeing there is so much negativity and just all round yuckiness going on right now. I can't help but wonder if it's boredom or nerves or what not, that has people, once again, promoting doubt and negativity, or in place, policing others with what to post or not post, feeling they are mouth pieces for the two men, not knowing at all what those two men even want or expect of us.

And it's really funny and absurd to me seeing people still doubt the strength of the bond these two young men have. Actually, it's ridiculous at this point.

Anyway, part 1 of their service is done. A very short but also intense and tough part - the transition from civilian to soldier with all it entails. Having to surrender much of your autonomy as an individual and becoming somewhat of a cog in the machine cannot be easy, even more so for those who enlist older, given that they have reached maturity, have a clear path in life, know what they want or don't want, etc.

Welcome to part 2, in which I do hope their placement is a good one, one they will be happy with (as much as you can be happy under these circumstances, of course).

Knowing that whatever may come, they have one another. There to support each other. Make each other laugh, even through the hard times (which I'm sure there will be). Lift one another up when they are feeling down.

And knowing all that, I know they will be ok!!

I need to believe that in a way, and don't come at me for saying this, this ordeal might do good for them (again, knowing they are together and have each other). Getting away from the industry, and even the distance from the fandom (especially the toxic parts of it) can do them good. As hard as it may be, it will give them experience in another aspect of life. In a way, it can even be a time for them to rest (as funny as that may sound). Having a healthier schedule, healthier wake and sleep hours. Healthier diet.

These are young men that all they know is the industry, of which they have been part of for over a decade, since their teenage years . This here (as hard as it is, especially for JM) might be a much needed forced break. To have a rest from the industry. To recharge, distance makes the heart fonder... not creating or performing will ignite or flame that fire in their belly once more. To experience something else in their life. To be treated, more or less, not like a celebrity, but like anybody else, for that short period of time to live their lives like 'ordinary' Korean young men. This can give them insight to things they would never in a million years see or experience otherwise. And it can strengthen them as human beings and as artists as well.

I need to believe all that!!

Anyway, now that part 1 is all but over and they are on to part 2, I'm also hoping that we will get to see more of them on their terms, that hopefully they will choose to keep in touch with us from time to time.

Maybe even together.

I'm really sorry, I feel like this post has been all over the place. I guess just like my current state of mind, lol.

In any case wishing them all the luck in their new assignments. Hope they are happy and content and STAY SAFE!!!

[ssa-atlas-alvez]

It Takes A Village Part 1 (Y/N Hotchner)

Warnings: some foul language, criminal minds level amount of gore

A/N: sorry this took so long to do lol it turned out to be mostly what I've written before lol

You weren’t pissed per se, just more… shocked, and maybe a little hurt, that Derek hadn’t spoken to you. One moment you were trying to fill out paperwork from a million different files, the next Derek and Garcia were telling the team they had found Declan. You had opted to wait with Garcia for Aaron to come back. It had been a hot minute since you’d seen him.

“Holy shit, you grew a beard?!” Is the first thing that slips out of your mouth. 

From there, everything was a blur. Doyle was in custody, he wasn’t exactly being helpful - which was annoying as it was his son you were trying to find afterall. 

“You get anywhere with Doyle?” Reid asked, as JJ, Derek, and Rossi walked back into the round table room.

“Doyle doesn’t think Gerace has the guts to take him on.” Derek said, you rolled your eyes. Of course he doesn’t, the man has a massive ego.

“But that’s definitely Gerace on the tape.” Garcia sighed as she sat down. 

Derek turned to your brother as he walked into the room. “Welcome back.”

“Thanks. Everybody take a seat.” You frowned, his tone (and eyebrows) indicating that something was definitely up. 

“Why? What’s going on? Is everything alright?” Derek asked, taking a seat next to you.

Aaron looked at you all, you were with Jack on this, you were not a fan of the beard. “Seven months ago I made a decision that affected this team.” Your brother stated. “As you all know Emily had lost a lot of blood after her fight with Doyle.”

You swallowed, hand reaching for Derek’s under the desk.

“But the doctors were able to stabilise her.” Aaron continued. “And she was airlifted from Boston to Bethesda under a covert exfiltration.”

You looked at your brother in disbelief, this didn’t make any sense. “Her identity was strictly need-to-know. And she stayed there until she was well enough to travel. She was reassigned to Paris where she was given several identities, none of which we had access to for her security.” 

“She’s alive?” You ask, eyebrows furrowed. 

“But we buried her.” Reid stated, looking up at Hotch from his seat. 

“As I said, I take full responsibility for the decision. If anyone has any issues, they should be directed toward me.”

“Any issues?” Derek asked, his voice clipped. “Yeah, I got issues.”

You turned, seeing Emily. Your face dropped. What the fuck. Maybe you were going insane? That was the only other option. Otherwise your brother had lied to you. The one person (apart from Derek) that you thought would never lie to you.

You turned to Aaron, who winced when he saw the hurt and betrayal that filled your eyes. You took a deep breath and just like that, the mask was up and the betrayal was hidden. You turned to Emily, “It’s great to see you’re okay,”

“It’s good to see you too.” She said, giving you a smile. 

You listened patiently as they all discussed the case. You didn’t have it in you. You just listened. As they continue, realising that the alpha of the team (a phrase you struggled to take seriously) was in fact a woman. When the team parted ways to investigate, you stood to make your way to the bathroom. 

“(Y/N)-”

“I don’t want to speak to you right now,”

“(Y/N), please just listen-”

“What, Aaron? You are the one person I could always trust and I did,” You paused, “There was no one else I trusted completely. I trusted you so much, you’re my big brother Aaron. I’ve always trusted you- not mum, not dad, heck I don’t even trust Sean as much, but you? I’ve always trusted you,”

“I’m sorry,” Aaron said, “We couldn’t tell anyone, it was for Emily’s safety,”

“We?”

“Me and JJ,”

“Right,” You said shortly, “JJ knew.”

“Just let me explain,”

“There’s nothing to explain.” You said shortly. “Emily’s alive and you chose to keep it from me.” 

“I had to,”

“Why because of protocol? Because it needed to be confidential?” You knew what you said was right because Aaron’s eyebrow softly twitched. “Who else would I have told Aaron? Who else? I don’t speak to anyone outside of this team! I don’t have a family, a Haley, a Will, children, fuck, I don’t even have a Sergio! I’ve got this team, that’s it! I wouldn’t have told anyone because I don’t have anyone to tell! You know that. That’s what hurts Aaron. So no, I don’t want to listen to you come up with some lame, half-ass excuse about safety.”

“(Y/N), I couldn't tell you in case you told anyone.” 

“Who would I have fucking told Aaron?! Who would I have told?!” You yell, fist slamming into the desk in front of you. “I have fuck all else! My life is this team and that's it! And you fucking know it! So please, tell me, who would I have told!”

You watch Aaron open his mouth for a split second before closing as he looks down.

“You know what, Aaron? Go fuck yourself. I can’t be fucked to deal with this right now.” You give him a tight smile before walking away.

[howtotrainabraincell]

Assassin's Creed Characters height... versus mine - Part 1

A/N: I am 5’7 and three quarters to be exact but they never take the other part into account so I get rounded into the 5’7 category lollll

Jacob Frye is said to 5'6 (although he's head cannoned to be taller). Cannot believe that I’m a little taller than my dream man but I LOVE MY SHORT KING. Who says you need to be tall to be a sexy sweetheart that everyone falls in love with?!

Evie Frye is said to be 5'6. Gotta love how she's considered "short", but she'll hand your ass to you on a silver platter and call it a regular Fryeday (am I right?) I’m taller than Evie which makes hugging her around the shoulders easy peasy!!

Arno Victor Dorian is said to be 6'0. We love our tall teddy bear baguette man.

Desmond Miles is said to be 6'0 tall as he's eye to eye with Altair and Ezio two of his ancestors. This man needs a million hugs and then some 🥹😩😭

Altair Ibn La'Ahad is said to be 6'0 (and we know that the man has long legs confirmed LOL). Imagine 6’0 of Altair coming at you in a dark alley… YIKES!!

Ezio Auditore da Firenze is said to be 6'0 (It fits, no? I mean anyone who looks at him can tell that he's very well built...) Strong as an Italian Gondola

Ratonhnhake:ton/Connor Kenway is said to be 6'4 (sometimes 6'2) but it's a known fact that he is the largest assassin in the franchise. Man is built like a BEAR. A BRICK BEAR.

Edward Kenway I've heard is roughly 5'9. Good height for a pirate he probably scared the crap out of the other pirates (bc they were typically malnourished due to all the time at sea and didn’t grow very tall from what I’ve read)

Haytham Kenway is said to be 6'0. What did they feed him growing up?! LOL

Shay Patrick Cormac is said to be 6'0. Not surprised the Irish have always been of good stock. Love this Irish penguin haha 😂

[enpr-ss]

Hermitcraft charity stream 2022 Highlights:

- 25k goal being broken by the Australians even before the event started, and the jokes about ending the stream there and seeing them next year

- Getting Martyn to do the donation readouts is GENIUS. He makes it actually entertaining to listen to!

- Martyn listening to Ren the most lol

- The bell bringing back Techno money bell memories

- Basalt Assault being broken by too much boomification (as predicted by Bdubs)

- Doc falling into Dunk Tank in the final winner-take-all round

- All the goofy skins (especially Grian’s cursed skins) and IRL costumes (Pearl’s old man mask, and Tango’s millions of hats)

- Every time Etho is confused about his fanbase

- Grian finishing backwards because “it’s the only way he can see” with his built-in rear view mirror

- Pearl getting to keep her horse from Horse Course!

- “Coming in not least but last” - Bdubs

- Scar actually doing so well on all the games actually?! I didn’t realize he was second on Horse Course

- “MY BLADDER’S FULL OF URINE” - Bdubs

- “While we were on our pee-pee break for the weak bladder people” - Doc

- Etho’s elytra glitching, with Cleo and Grian hitting him around

- Racers stealing other boats. Tango and Cub winning the race by a mile through switching drivers at the bubblevator

- Jevin fell down the powdered snow section LOL!

- Iskall fixing the Hermit Incentives redstone by just moving the dispenser and the button

- The speed at which Doc’s diamonds DISAPPEARED and then all the subsequent mocking just as a 5k soon came through

- Ren: “Nothing will calm your nerves more than Grian’s gong”

Grian: screaming “LALALALALAAAAAL” as he smashes the gong repeatedly (twice)

- Bdubs being spleefed by Tango (VIA PREINSTALLED REDSTONE) into a hole and Doc not caring because he doesn’t have any diamonds. And then Etho punching Tango into the same hole.

- Grian: “I need everyone to take a really nice deep breath in through the nose-”

Everyone: *exaggerated gasps and choking noises*

Grian: “We’re doing that again because everyone FAILED at breathing”

Doc’s panicked breathing and getting TNT to blow everyone up

Scar: “Can I get another dong real quick?”

Grian: “With a g, yes you can.”

- Scar made Panda Resue (lol) in ONE NIGHT?!?! But with no pandas lol

- Doc on strike until he gets his diamonds back

- Bucket rush more entertaining than expected and Scar absolutely killing it

- Hermits interpreting the 350k goal as returning Doc’s diamonds (THEN GRIAN RESTEALING THEM AND SETTING 400K AS THE GOAL FOR THE RETURN LOL)

- All the lore that I’m getting it discover as a new fan!!!

- How the hermits are perfectly quiet whenever another is explaining game rules or when Martyn is reading out donos.

- Impulse being absolutely on the ball with all the drumrolls

- Etho and his pvp player head + item collection mechanics

- Scar absolutely bowspamming yellow team, and Red Team continuing to kill for the spawn mechanics lol. ALMOST WINNING BY 1 POINT!!!

- Martyn with the stellar Battle Bane commentary!

- Scar donating on behalf on those who cannot donate, and apparently this is a common thing with him??? Amazing.

- The carts will have hermitcraft plaques!!

- Glasgow family’s 1k dono: Donated in memory of Technoblade.

- All the smooth backend operations by fans and others! Nothing broken amazingly.

- Doc still asking about the diamonds and Martyn announcing that he had them in a plot twist and logging out

- Only 1 week of prep??!! Insane

- $425k raised!!!! Incredible!!!!!

- Bro when Ren and Tango said Joe’s beard had legos and pinballs in it THEY WERE NOT JOKING. Omg. I genuinely thought the mechanical part was like part of his microphone set up. A SIX DOLLAR HUNTING KNIFE?!???? FROM THE GROCERY OUTLET??? WITH BRASS KNUCKLES??? FOR PIZZA???? This is my first time watching a Joe stream. is he always like this. His transparent facecam overlay is also cool; I like it better than the usual corner ones. HE ACTUALLY WENT WITH THE CRAYOLA SCISSORS??? No mirror only OBS??? His concern with accidentally hurting himself is not being able to talk and violating TOS LOL. HES GOING TO FILTER OUT THE BLOOD SO THAT TWITCH DOESNT BAN HIM. He’s doing it in the worst way possible as a commitment to the bit. He’s so hostile to capitalism it’s great. All after an 8 hour driver from Chicago. MUMBO COSPLAY LOL

[buckybabieboy]

You’re five are so good!! EXACTLY what I’ve been looking for!!! I just read your list of headcanons and I would LOVE a full length fic about what happened the first time he got overstimulated and used his safe word (and all of that lovely aftercare that followed). If you have time of course, no pressure!

I'M BACK!!!!! and you are so sweet babie, made me smile🥹. thx for your request and I hope you like ur fic <3

Plum. (Pt. 1)

⚠️TW: (please read!): SO MUCH NSFW!!! LIKE 2 AND 1/2 ROUNDS LMAO, sub!inexperienced!bucky, dom!fem!reader, a little bit of a mean!reader, thigh riding!!, overstimulation(m!receiving), unprotected p in v sex, mentions of subspace, mommy/mama kink, use of “y/n”, bucky calls you "babe" once or twice, use of safeword, TONS of aftercare <3

☁️Summary: After a bad day outside and an incident with Bucky, you catch an inexperienced!bucky pathetically humping your pillow. Your sadistic thoughts cause you to get carried away. Bucky's up to it at first, just wanting you to make him feel good. But as the night goes on he begins to realize he was in over his head. (Bucky’s first time being overstimulated and uses safeword!!)

📝 Important A/N!!: I exceeded my character limit (lol). I had to divide this whole fic into two parts, so pls stay tuned for part 2 (dropping soon)! Part 2 will be where the actual overstimulation takes place. Also I added thigh riding because it just made the whole plot imo😩. THERE IS SO MUCH FUCKING DETAIL IN HERE I LOWKEY OVERDID IT LMAOOOO

Traffic is the bane of your existence. You’re usually a very patient person, but when you’re stuck behind ten cars and a red light that just won’t seem to turn green, your patience suddenly becomes none.

There were a million things you wanted to accomplish before the day was finished. Your laundry and Bucky's still needed to be washed, and no matter how many times you reminded Bucky how the washing machine worked, he would continue to give you that bewildered and helpless face, leaving you to do it by yourself. On top of that, you left the apartment a mess. You secretly hope Bucky cleaned around the house while you were gone, though you weren’t counting on it.

Horns blow from different cars amongst the street, as if that would speed the agonizing waiting process up. You let out a huge sigh of relief when the light turns green, finally making your turn to your apartment complex. Once you’ve parked the car, you trudge your way to the apartment. Before unlocking the door, you make an effort to collect yourself so you don’t take you anger out on Bucky.

You can’t stop yourself from letting out another sigh in relief; you were finally home from your long and rough day outside. And to your surprise, the apartment is now squeaky clean. The floor had been swept and vacuumed, and was shined from being mopped. Dropping your purse on the kitchen counter, you kick of your shoes and let your hair down from the tight ponytail it’s been in all day.

“Bucky, I’m home!” You call out as you scavenge the pantry for a snack. Not even a second later, footsteps were coming towards you, and before you can even open your bag of chips, Bucky has dashed to your side and was holding you tight in his arms.

“y/n, your back!”

“hey, Jamie!” You plaster on a smile, trying to reciprocate his energy. His face is still buried in your neck, his hands tangled in your hair.

“missed you.” Bucky whines as he inhales the scent of your perfume. “why’d you have to leave me every day?”

Bucky was clinging to you as if he hadn’t seen you in years. His clinginess was undoubtedly caused because of Steve. He hadn’t been the same since he left, and you understood this better than anyone. You try to relax in his embrace, and allow him to hold you for as long as he needed.

“I'm not even gone for that long, Bucky.” You giggle as you try to enjoy the one good part of your day. “c’mon, let me get changed. I’m tired and had a really rough day.” You whisper to him softly. He nods and begins to free you from his arms.

“ow!” You wail suddenly, scrunching your face in pain. Multiple strands of hair had gotten caught on Bucky’s vibranium arm.

“sorry! let me just-” Bucky tries to disconnect your hair from his fingers, but only makes the situation worse by tangling them deeper towards your scalp.

“Bucky, just stop it!”

You drop your unopened bag of chips on the counter before grabbing his hand and leading him to the bathroom mirror. You begin untangling his fingers from your hair slowly, letting out a wince every so often, but finally managing to free his metal fingers from your hair.

“Y/n, didn’t meant to-”

“s’fine. just gonna brush my hair now.” You exhale before grabbing the brush and detangling your hair. Although you’d never show it to your very oblivious Bucky, this was your last straw today. You slam the bathroom door in his face in a fit of anger. Ignoring how badly you immediately felt afterwards, you attempt to calm yourself down.

“It’s not his fault. It’s not his fault. It’s not his fault.” You tell yourself as you struggle to comb out the knots in your hair. After you finished with your hair and wash up, you quickly pass through the bedroom, catching a quick glance at Bucky before you pass. He’s sound asleep on the bed, sprawled out like a dog on your sheets. Clad in only briefs, his pale and plush thighs were exposed just for you to see.

Trying to stop your mind from wandering into other places, you decide to use this time for yourself to forget about the unfortunate day you’ve had. Without another thought, you throw a bag of popcorn in the microwave and turn on some Adult-Swim, doing your best to cloud your mind.

You must’ve been there for over an hour, because before you knew it, it was already 8:00 pm. A yawn escapes from your throat as you clean up and head to your bedroom.

You’re about to open the door when you hear what sounds like faint moans coming from the other side, along with rhythmic creaks from the bed.

As you lean your ear against the door and listen for Bucky's pitiful whimpers, filthy and nasty thoughts start to flood your mind. You open the door a crack, just enough to see Bucky frantically rutting his bare cock against your pillow, which cemented your suspicions. The sight was truly pathetic. His boxer briefs were slung around his ankles, and his brown hair clung to his sweaty forehead. He continues to fuck your pillow without noticing you, obviously too concentrated on trying to cum.

You enjoyed your Adult-Swim, but this, this was a show for you. A sight for your extremely sore eyes. You were honestly at a crossroads here, almost not wanting to intervene. Just let him fuck himself on the pillow you sleep on every night, even though he obviously didn’t know what he was doing. His movements were sloppy and lazy, indicating that he’d been at this for a while.

“dammit!” He whines as he falls lip onto your pillow, finally giving up. He continues to whine and whimper into it, still grinding ever so slightly onto the sheets. You watch him closely, noticing how desperate he looks, exhausted and frustrated because he just couldn’t seem to make himself cum.

“awh…poor baby.” You interrupt as you open the door and enter the room. Bucky immediately stops his movements and stares at you like a deer in headlights. “couldn’t do it by yourself?”

“tryin…” Bucky whines, head faced down at his painfully hard cock which was twitching against your pillow. “shit… just can’t do it like you can, babe..”

Bucky picks his subtle but noticeable thrust against your pillow again, looking at you with teary eyes. You slowly make your way to the bed and grab his face with both hands and kiss his plush lips. His big blue eyes look up at you as he gives you a meek smile.

You give him one more kiss. “I’ll bet I could do a better job than this pillow, don’t ya think?”

Bucky nods in agreement, immediately throwing the pillow to the side and kicking off his briefs as you settle yourself on the bed and against the headboard. Bucky stares at you with anticipation, waiting for you to tell him what to do next. With two flicks of your pointer and middle finger, he’s crawled to your side in an instant.

“on my lap, lovie.” Your sultry voice commands, and Bucky does exactly what you tell him. His plush thighs have settled against both sides of your left thigh, and he settles his bum on your lap.

You graze your fingers lightly up and down his red and stiff cock, causing a breathy whine escape his throat.

“m-mommy, please don’t tease me like that… been w-waiting f’you all day…” Bucky whimpers shakily, hips bucking up at your movements. “hah- n-need more!”

A smirk creeps it’s way onto your face. He was so fucking adorable when he’s begging you to make him feel good. So adorable that you couldn’t help but tease him a little before giving him what he wants.

“how bad, hm?” You tease, fingertips dragging down to his balls, giving them a tight and sudden squeeze. Bucky’s mouth falls agape, and his eyebrows furrow upwards as he yelps at the sudden sensation.

“s-so bad, f-fuck!” His voice only gets whinier after your taunting.

“hmm… I don’t think you want it bad enough, darlin.”

Bucky watches your face with watery eyes, noticing your sadistic smile never disappear.

“n-no! please babe, want it- need it so bad!” He bucks his hips towards you, desperately searching for any sort of friction. His cock pulses under your fingertips, which are still softly grazing it up and down. Your face remains cold and unamused, as if his tears weren’t enough to convince you.

Bucky shakily takes your fingers, rubbing them on the tip of his cock, gathering as much precum he can with your fingers.

“s-see? d'you see, mama? l-leakin' so much for you. jus' gimme somethin', anythin' please...”

You knew you were being cruel by making him wait this long, but he looked so pretty begging for you to make him cum. The fact that he only depended on you to make him orgasm made your pussy throb. And as he so pathetically told you before, he just couldn’t do it like you can. He definitely didn’t have half the sexual experience you did, and still couldn’t even jerk himself off enough to get himself to cum.

“and what if it’s too much f’you? don't want you to get overwhelmed.” You question, placing your hands on both of hips, receiving a pleading look from Bucky.

“I asked you a question, Jamie.” You shoot him an alluring and voluptuous look with wide eyes, but Bucky just couldn’t meet your gaze. His eyes were shut closed, his face contorted in desperation.

“hah- d-don’t care… just do somethin’- nngh!”

Bucky starts, but interrupts himself with a pathetic whimper when he feels you grip harder onto his hips, slightly nudging them back and forth. His cock twitches as all of his pre-cum leaks onto your bare thigh, creating a slick and pleasurable mess for him to fuck himself on.

“a-ah, f-fuuckk…” a long whine makes its way from Bucky’s throat, his eyes rolled back. “please, mommy… can’t keep doin' this to me…”

“you wanna cum?”

He immediately nods his head up and down.

“go ahead then, pretty boy. fuck yourself against mommy's thigh.”

“wha..? n-no I-I can’t-”

“It’s my thigh or nothin’ Jamie.”

Bucky remains quiet for a little while but softly nods his head in agreeance.

You release your hold on his hips, curious to see how he will do on his own. Bucky starts to frantically rutt up against your thigh. His lack of rhythm causes you to think back to how you found him earlier. Your helpless little baby was in too much of a hurry to cum to get himself there.

“goddamit, I-” Bucky whimpers as his movements come to a stop and he punches the bed in defeat. “I don’t know how… please show me…”

Tears are streaming down his cheeks as he does his absolute best not to make eye contact with you. It was humiliating enough to have to ask you to make him cum.

Finally deciding to have some mercy, you begin to rock his hips back and forth, slow and steady against your thigh.

“ha-d-don’t stop, please…” His eyes are rolled back, little grunts escaping from his pink, parted lips. His metal hand holds onto your shoulder while the flesh one grips harshly onto the white bed sheets.

“you look so pretty fucking yourself on my thigh, baby. that’s it…keep goin’, don’t stop…"You coo at Bucky, who continues to desperately go at it on your thigh. Once he’s found rhythm, you let go of his hips and watch him.

Your praises must have motivated him some more, because his thrusts increased in speed, causing the whole bed to rock in unison to his frantic movements. His dog tags do the same, clashing into each other and swaying in tune with him.

The way Bucky's cock twitches and pulses against you is almost as if it is pleading for release. Even though it feels incredible, being inside of yourself will always be superior. The comforting, smooth feeling of your walls is unrivaled by anything. However, he keeps rutting against you in an attempt to get the relief he has been chasing all day.

Bucky’s grunts and pants above you. The sounds coming from him become more high-pitched with each jerk of his hips. The feeling of his warm pre-cum against the smooth skin of your thigh was driving his aching cock insane. He was so desperate for release—and he was almost there. Almost about to cum all over you. But his thighs were burning in pain.

“oh, fuck! I can’t, p-please, mama! please help me, I’m almost there!” Bucky cries, tears streaming down his extremely flushed cheeks.

His thighs tremble and spasm, his movements slowing down. He couldn’t do it anymore. Your baby had been at this for hours before you found him; it was only a matter of time before he would become completely exhausted. Your supersoldier definitely had super strength, but there were certain things he just couldn’t do by himself.

Such a poor little baby.

You latch your hands onto his hips again, more than willing to help your baby boy. With a slight nudge backwards and forwards, Bucky becomes a whining mess, his hips stuttering under your hands as you guide him closer to his orgasm. He thrusts frantically against your thigh, but this time in a perfect rhythm of back and forth movements (he has you to thank for that).

“good boy, Jamie. almost there, you can do it, baby.” Your words come out soft and smooth, coaxing him even further. He pants and whimpers through gritted teeth, muttering an almost incoherent string of curses.

“a-ah, shit-please… lemme cum, please lemme cum! m’ so close, so fucking close!”

You hum in response.

"go ahead, baby, you've been such a good boy for me."

A fraction of a second later, Bucky throws his head back, violently spasming on your lap. Loads of his white cum spurt out all over your leg as he cries out pathetically for you. His large, veiny hands desperately grab at the sheets, as his eyes roll back in pleasure. The veins in his cock are more than prominently bulging as it twitches and pulsates up and down against your now cum-coated thigh.

You watch him intently. His eyes have closed shut, and his heavy panting causes his loose brown hair to blow up with each breath. A few moments later, he falls limp against your chest.

"you okay, Buck?"

Bucky swallows for a moment, then contiunes to pant heavily. You fawn over his cuteness.

"answer me, baby boy. mommy asked you a question."

He softly nods his head against your chest.

"good," you reply with a whisper. "'cause I know you can give me another one."

STAY TUNED FOR PT. 2!!!

[hughiecampbelle]

Waves Pt. 1 (Kendall Roy Oneshot)

Character/s: Kendall, Logan

Word Count: 1,518

Inspired By: Liquid Smooth - Mitski (Audiotree Live Version)

Requested: Ok I have no idea why I was so drawn to these but if any inspiration strikes, maybe a fic or something with Shrink from the description prompts and Clawfoot Tub from Object/Thing prompts. To me it vibes with Kendall but I'd be happy seeing it written with anyone that comes to mind - @locke-writes

Tag: @locke-writes

A/N: Noah I'm sorry it's literally been a million years. I got bit by the writing bug this morning and I saw your request and I just wanted to hurt everyone's feelings lol. Please forgive me!!! I hope you're doing okay and that this isn't too late/total garbage!!! Feedback is always appreciated 💜💜💜

Succession Masterlist / REQUESTS ARE OPEN / Waves Pt. 2

He can close his eyes, he can plunge himself beneath the water, he can hold his breath until his lungs begin to burn, set fire in in his chest, exhaling smoke and ash, but, he cannot forget. It wasn’t disgust. It wasn’t hurt. It wasn’t anger. It was heartbreak. Pure, genuine heartbreak. It was visceral and agonizing and bloody. You were shattering before him, across the room for him, and he could do nothing but watch. Stare. Like a fool. An onlooker to the breakdown of a stranger, a pedestrian, instead of the love of his life. Shrinking deeper, smaller, until you were nothing but a mite atop the fabric of the cushions. Wine stem in shaking hand, a coffee table between you littered with various glasses and room-temperature alcohol. There was sweat of the outside, the ice cubes long forgotten, beading down into the coaster. Behind him, faintly, he can hear the rest of the party. A steady, low murmur of voices fills the pulsing air between you. His father, a man made of rot and stone, spoke those awful words to you, about you, right in front of you. He berated you. He spat at you. He called you a worthless nothing, an appendage growing from his son, sucking the life out of him. Sucking the blood and money from this family. Then, to him, he insists that he could find someone better, smarter, better looking. There is no rebuttal, there is no last straw, there is only a cowering of his spine, as if this lecture has been triggered by the roundness, proudness of his shoulders, his posture and chest. He braces for impact. He flinches. When his show is over, when the last lines have been spoken, he takes his bow and exits off stage. 

There is an audience of two and no one is clapping. 

Siently, your eyes widen and well up in tears. He swears, though he can't say definitely, he cannot verify yes, it truly happened, you let out a single gasp of air. A wretched sound to anyone listening. The screech of tires before it crashes. The burst of porcelain across the hard wood floors, the remnants scattering, running, scraping on impact. The wet squelch of a someone rummaging around inside of someone’s open torso, trying to find and stop a bleed before the patient dies on the table. It is unfinished. It is dirty. It is obscene. It is a sound one wishes to take back, to unhear. Childishly, he wants to press his hands over his ears. He wants to beg you to stop, please, please! But just as it occurs, it is over. A single gasp. A single breath. Proof of life. You were never one for the dramatics. Your personality had always been shy. This was no different. Wounded animals did not announce their wounds. Instead, they dragged themselves off into solitude and assessed the damage. He’s not sure why he knew this was happening, why this was going to happen, only that he does. He stands, his eyes never leaving you. As if on cue, you set your drink down and take your place parallel to him, on your feet. You don’t wipe your tears away. You don’t even realize they’ve fallen. You move towards the closet by the entrance. He tries to stop you, to help you, to comfort you, but all that comes out is begging. Pleading. Please don’t go. Please, y/n. Excuses. You know dad, he wasn’t- he didn’t mean it. Please don’t go. Please. . . You find your coat on the hanger and slip your arms through. It was beautiful today, the weather, but the nights get cold and vengeful and you have already been bitten. Your skin resembles the inside of Logan’s mouth: you are covered in teeth marks and spit. You were his chew toy, for a little while, for a long time, before he decided he was bored. Before he decided he was done with you. 

He catches your arm, places his fingers around your bicep as if you are a lifevest and he a survivor of drowning. Scared. No, petrified, he cannot make full sentences. He stutters his way through something that does not resemble anything else. There are no apologies, from him or his father, so it must not be an apology. There is bargaining, but there is no deal. There is only a smattering of words that come to mind, a mess, a diaster of drastic proportions. No one else has notice the mess before you, preventing you from leaving. They have not bled out from the dining room yet. If you want this to be quick, painless, you have to do it soon. Wordlessly, you tug yourself free. You meet his eyes: hazel, warm, pooling with conflictions. You know this. You have seen this before. Torn in half: his left goes to Logan, promises that he will one day make him proud, his right throws himself into you, at you, and you must clean him up. You must clean up the crime scene. Even now, after what his father’s said, after what he’s been saying all the years you’ve been together, and still he can’t make up his mind. He can’t decide. You’ve grown tired of half. Half of him, his love, his attention. Half of the man you endured pain, and hatred, and disgust for. This family never liked you. This family never gave you a second thought. It was supposed to be worth it, being ith him, staying with him. How foolish you feel. How stupid you are, standing here, watching him go back and forth. You put your hand on his, squeeze it, before pulling away from him. You eye his form before the elevator doors shut. He wore the suit you loved, with the tie his father had chosen for him so long ago. His shoes resembled Logan’s, but his socks, the one’s you’d watched him pick out this morning, were one’s you’d gotten him this past Christmas. If he could have, if he had the ability, he would have cut himself to pieces and gifted half to you, half to Logan. He was already doing that, just without the wrapping paper and bow. Without the hacksaw. Without the gore. 

He’d call your phone, over and over, listening to the familiar of your voice as it directs him to leave a message. He doesn’t stop until the box is full. His siblings make their jokes when they notice your absence. Cruel, harsh, Roy-like. He is grateful you are not here to listen, to hurt anymore than you already are. Logan pats him on the back, inviting him into his good graces as if the past hour hadn’t happened, as if your entire marriage hadn’t happened. Stunned, shocked, Kendall goes along with it. He tries to speak up, to stand up, but it is ill timed, ill received, and Logan shuts it down before it has the potential be anything impactful. I see y/n had better plans than to be here with their family. His defense gets stuck in his throat. He nearly chokes. 

The water is cold, frozen, and he splashes in over his face. The look in your eyes. The gasp. Stop, he thinks, stop, stop, stop. You took the car and disappeared. He called and called and you never picked up. He thought, he hoped, you might be home, but when he let himself in the place was dark and uninviting. He searched for signs, clues you might have left him, but everything lay undisturbed. Tipsy and full of regret, he lets the faucet run in the tub. Had you been here. Had this whole night not happened, you might’ve joined him. He always felt the most at home here, with you, in the bath. You would have laughed at him, yelped that the water was too cold, before dipping your head under. You were so much braver than him. Now he sits, knees to chest, his back arched into a C. He is shivering and unhappy and cursing himself. If he could just say something, anything. If he had been doing it since you got together, all those years ago, instead of making you his fathers personal pin cushion. If, if, if. If he had been a better man, a better husband, a better son. Isn’t that what’s wrong, though? He was a good son, he was better than good, but he was not a worthy husband. All these years he watched you get torn down. He watched as something withered and died inside of you. But you still showed up. You braced yourself for impact. You laughed along to jokes made at you expense. And at the end of every night, every party, every event, you went home with him. Hand in loving hand. He didn’t know where you were, what you were doing, only that he was overwhelmed with the terrible feeling, while staring at the empty side of the tub, that he had made a horrific mistake that he could not take back.

[cowboyinternist]

what makes sam and jackie compelling/interesting as a ship to u? /gen :O (not related to anything ive been meaning to send u this ask for a while and only just got round to it lol)

i think a big part of it is that the way jackie talks about sam makes them a lot more interesting as a character?

because objectively, sam sucks! as we see them about 90% of the time, they’re incredibly self serving and negligent. and that’s putting it in as simple terms as possible.

but we get these small implications as time goes on that there’s something beyond that! which is most notable in the interaction they have with dana in episode 83 (another thing i could talk about for a million years (i could also go on a whole other tangent about how them showing their face is another really huge example of this but that’s off topic rn)). but none of them are necessarily set in stone, outright saying who they are. like MAYBE sam isn’t completely horrible, but who can really be sure?

but then Jackie says this in it devours,

sam is nice! really nice, actually! outside of the specific context of them being the sheriff and instead them,,, fundamentally as a person. and it isn’t like jackie is this one off character whose judgment we can’t trust. we spend an entire book getting to know her! and i feel like jackie is reliable in this aspect, especially post novel 1. this is the first and really like,, ONLY time we get info on sam from somebody who actually knows them personally. and interestingly enough, the next time we get insight on this aspect of their character, it can be linked back to jackie. they only decide to stand up against the university of what it is once they threaten josh, who is jackie’s half brother. and it is IMMEDIATE they are,, FRONT and fucking center in that movement. like their relationship is so interesting because jackie saying something as simple as that shakes up everything we know about this character.

and this all makes it very interesting to explore just,, what makes sam so fucking horrible outside of that? like what is it that drives them to be that way. and there are so many possible answers to that question and i have my own extensive thoughts on that but again,, off topic.

i love it all so much because it plays into the major themes of perspective that wtnv has? which i think is my favorite thing about the podcast. cecil has his own perception of sam, so does dana, so does jackie. and none of those perceptions are necessarily false, because they’re based on those people’s individual experiences.

also i enjoy the way their relationship is foreshadowed in the novel because i think that with the way she describes it, sam is like the LAST character you’d expect her to end up with lmao.

but yeah TLDR; i find them compelling because sam is absolutely awful and jackie is not, but she describes them as a really nice person anyways ^-^

[welcometololaland]

2023 in summary - slightly less productive than 2022, with way more speed bumps than usual (lying catatonic in bed for a month was not on the agenda, surprisingly). Here's to a better 2024!

Fandoms: I added to the chaos this year by jumping into Top Gun Maverick, but Ao3 tells me my beloved in 2023 was 911 Lone Star. I also wrote more RWRB fics, so that rounded out the holy trinity.

Total words (on Ao3) in 2023: 404,508 of posted fic (with a few thousand yet to go). 2023 pushed my total word count over 1 million 💜

Total words (unposted, in my Google Docs but written in 2023):

40k approx of Pet Store AU (co-write with @strandnreyes)

14k approx of Call Me (co-write with @rmd-writes)

44k approx of Eurotrip (although I think I only wrote about 15k of that in 2023).

3k of The Ring-In 2.0.

1k of Christmas fic.

31k of 10 Things I Hate About You AU.

11k of Product Placement.

so...like a LOT of unposted WIP.

Most recent fic: a long time ago (we used to be friends)

Longest fic: the fic above at 166k approx (my longest ever! for now...)

Top fic by kudos: Fifty First Dates (the oodie agenda reigns supreme)

Top fic by comments: Cursed is a State of Mind (cursed coffee is a hot topic)

Projects for 2024: Finishing something of the above? If my most recent RWRB fic does okay, maybe I'll dedicate my whole summer to Eurotrip? Idk. I keep running out of steam worrying it's going to be a flop lol.

What I want to read: SO MUCH. guys. I'm so behind. I'm so, so sorry. I need to finish Knave 3 by @liminalmemories21, the Gabriel fic by @wandering-night19, the prompt fills by @strandnreyes, first aid by @heartstringsduet, the angsty fic by @carlos-in-glasses, bottom carlos that came out the other day by @goodways, the food fic by @reyesstrand, fear kidnapped tk fic by @birdclowns, the boxing au (is it out yet?? i'm seriously so pathetic) by @cold-blooded-jelly-doughnut and legit so many other things that are just not at the top of my mind yet. OH and i am frothing at the mouth to read accidental couples therapy firstprince by @cha-melodius and i heard that @cricketnationrise and maybe someone else wrote a fic about oodies?? @celeritas2997 send me the links!!!!!!! and the percy jackson au by @inexplicablymine @read-and-write- and @happiness-of-the-pursuit. also i never sat down and finished to build a home part 3 @freneticfloetry i owe you that please don't think i've forgotten!!! okay guys do you see how frantic my brain is now? please don't judge me i'm sure there's WAY MORE i'm just forgetting. everyone send me their reading lists!!!!!! i finally have time!!!!! also i'm gonna put @celeritas2997 sweet sweet voice in my ear and listen to her podfic to calm me down. OH AND ALL THE SNOWFLAKS (@everwitch-magiks @clottedcreamfudge @athousandrooms @dustratcentral @three-drink-amy @indomitable-love @villiageidiot @rmd-writes).

Lolaland over and out! (Maybe, maybe there is time in the year for a couple more thousand words...)

[happiness-of-the-pursuit]

2023 Fic Round Up (Part 1: Fic List)

I have been tagged in about a million different round ups of sorts, so here's Part 1: A Comprehensive 2023 Fic List sorted by month posted (if a multichap, I listed it the first month it posted), featuring the major details and a single-sentence summary/quote (so a fun challenge for me).

I'll post Part 2: Favorite Quotes and Part 3: Channeling Nora Holleran to Bring You My AO3 Data over the next two days (for the data I want to wait til the last possible day).

Without further ado, here is my 2023 Fic List:

January:

Nothing, I was still a lurker.

February:

Prince Henry and FSOTUS Alex Claremont-Diaz Answer the Web’s Most Searched Questions (T, 2.4K, YouTube Script Fic)

10 Things Alex Claremont-Diaz Can’t Live Without (T, 3K, YouTube Script Fic)

10 Things HRH Prince Henry Can’t Live Without (T, 2.5K, YouTube Script Fic)

March:

Prince Henry and FSOTUS Alex Claremont-Diaz Take a Couples Quiz (T, 5K, YouTube Script Fic)

The Super Six Take a Lie Detector Test | Vanity Fair (M, 7K, YouTube Script Fic)

Baby's First Pride (E, 10K, WIP Multi-Chap)

Post-canon, canon-compliant (ignoring bonus chapter) look at the Super Six celebrating their first pride after the emails—I want to come back and finish this (I got interrupted by Life) but my writing has evolved a lot since March and I'm daunted by all the editing I'd have to do, lol

ALEX CLAREMONT-DIAZ COMMUNES WITH HIS ANCESTORS WHILE EATING SPICY WINGS | Hot Ones (T, 3K, YouTube Script Fic)

April-June

Trying to survive the end of the school year as a teacher before I left my job :)

July

PRINCE HENRY SENTENCES US TO THE DUNGEONS WHILE EATING SPICY WINGS | Hot Ones  (M, 3K, YouTube Script Fic)

August

FirstPrince Sings Queen, Lil Nas X, and Taylor Swift in a Game of Song Association | ELLE (T, 2.5K, YouTube Script Fic)

Claremont 2008 (M, 26K, Complete Multi-Chap, Canon Divergence)

A world where Ellen gets elected in 2008 instead of 2016, and the friends-to-lovers path that puts Henry on. If you want to relive the early 2010s, enjoy epistolary fics, or want a glimpse of a world where Alex & Henry go to college together, you might like this.

September

How well you play...that's up to you (M, 4K, FirstPrince Week)

Grey's Anatomy-Inspired AU, where Alex & Henry are both surgical residents—currently a one-shot, but I plan on writing a multi-chap prequel for this at some point.

Keep this Love in a Photograph (T, 2.6K, FirstPrince Week)

Post-Canon: Henry finds Alex's old photo album and they take a stroll down memory lane.

The Starwand (T, 1.7K, FirstPrince Week)

Three vignettes from Alex's life (two featuring Henry) where a sparkler makes an appearance—both a kid fic of Alex and Alex with his kids.

Somebody Call 911 (M, 2.4K, FirstPrince Week)

College AU where Alex is sneaking around with Henry behind his roommate's back—until it all goes to shit.

October

Sets on the Beach (M, 4K, FirstPrince Week)

Crack Treated Seriously, Alex and Henry are on rival queer beach volleyball teams.

Water over Blood (G, 3K, FirstPrince Week)

Post-Canon 5+1 of five times Henry's niece loved Alex, and one time she loved Henry

L(ate) S(leepy) A(morous) T(exting) (M, 1K, FirstPrince Week)

Text-fic of a missing moment from the book, because I am convinced that Alex did, in fact, study for the LSAT (it's just more realistic if we're to believe he scored well enough to get into NYU)

November

Freaky Friday (I woke up in my enemy's body) (M, 9K, Halloween, Huh?)

Canon Divergence, Freaky Friday-Inspired Body Swap AU, Crack Treated Seriously: Between Cakegate and Alex's visit to London, the boys swap bodies and proceed to learn a lot about each other. And themselves.

December

Alex Claremont-Díaz Answers Your Questions | Actually Me |GQ (M, 2K, YouTube Script Fic)

Super Six and the Siren's Call (T, 111K Total, Posting Bi-weekly)

The Percy Jackson AU, co-written with @read-and-write- and @inexplicablymine. Quests and Greek References abound! Check out more @auntiepezzasupdates

(Dil)Do It Yourself (E, 16.7K, New Traditions Advent Calendar)

Alex attends a DIY Dildo Workshop for the holidays, where he meets Henry, who's helping to lead the workshop—and eventually, helps Alex in other ways. The tags will tell you all that you need to know.

Thanks to @rockyroadkylers @hgejfmw-hgejhsf @kiwiana-writes @welcometololaland and anyone else who tagged me that I missed! I was waiting to post all my fics for December before I did this :) Since I'm pretty late, I'll tag @ssmtskw @matherines @affectionatelyrs and an open tag to anyone who's made it this far and wants to do this!

[asexualbookbird]

It was not a great month for reading enjoyment. It did not start off strong, a book I was really looking forward to enjoying was boring as hell, and now my brain is too foggy to enjoy anything more complex I've been wanting to read. It WAS a good month in terms of volume, though. Two chonky books, and eight overall, if we care about those stats. Which I do a little bit. Numbers are arbitrary, but it does give me a sense of accomplishment when I read an 800 page book, I will not lie.

Eryie: Gryphon Insurrection by K Vale Nagle ⭐ - I'll admit, this is partially my fault. My brain skipped right over the Gryphon Insurrection part of the title, so I wasn't really expecting gryphon genocide, the children's novel. On top of that, it just wasn't well written! POV changes well over halfway through the book, no character is distinct, only thing it has going for it is it finally made me jump into Guardians of Ga'Hoole, but. uh. Well you'll see.

Dragon Pearl by Yoo Ha Lee ⭐⭐⭐- It was fine! Entertaining! I know YA and MG books don't have the luxury of going too deep into lore or anything, but it was really lacking here. She was sad about her brother being dead for like. One line. And then got over it. Kids deserve to read emotional depth! It was a cute adventure, but nothing I'd read again. It does make me more excited about Ninefox Gambit, though, because I can see the bones of good writing!

The Dragon of Jin-Sayeng by KS Villso ⭐⭐⭐⭐- Ow. What an end to a series. Everyone is awful, everyone sucks, except Khine, love of my life. It's always harder to talk about the books I like, but I did really enjoy this series. I'd like to reread it one day!

Legacy of Ash by Matthew Ward ⭐- I was sooooo looking forward to this. I even bought book two (at a secondhand shop thankfully) because I really thought I'd enjoy it. LOL. It took 800 pages to say nothing at all. It was long for the sake of being long. It was like four different plots trying to be one, and none of them really amounted to anything because the focus was so split. Really, similar problems as Priory, but at least that was gay.

The Guardians of Ga'Hoole by Kathryn Lasky (1-4) ⭐⭐⭐- Finally starting this series after a million years! It came highly recommended from many friends throughout my life, so I've naturally been putting it off. It's fine. I did really enjoy the first one, but reading more left me really picking it apart and it's a solid three stars for me. I think Animorphs is more well rounded, but it's still an entertaining series. My biggest gripe is the inconsistencies! Soren and crew decides to withhold information from the Guardians, and then the next book the Guardians have that information? And said they got it from the gang?? Not sure how th timeline works for Metal Beak to be Soren's brother when Metal Beak was supposed to be a Big Scary Enemy to all of owlkind. Thought it might be a Dread Pirate Robert's situation, but nope! Kludd has been the only Metal Beak! Kids deserve better lol I'll read what I have (eleven books) but probably nothing more than that.

I don't have reading plans or goals for February. I'm still sick, doing things is hard. I'm just trying to survive over here. If you have recommendations for easy to read silly books, I am all ears!

[theproverbialpen]

Musings from a Hazbin Fan and Hotel Employee

Yeah, that's right—I'm posting to this blog for the first time in years because I got into Hazbin Hotel of all things. Not only did I get into this cursed fandom, I'm writing fan fiction for it. Fan fiction. I think the last time I wrote fanfiction was...2012? 2013? And I only ever told 3 people about that one. Now here I am posting on main. The brainrot truly is unquantifiable.

If you're one of the few people that survived the purge of those I know IRL, congratulations. Please don't judge me lol. Anyways, actual musings are below the cut!

So I’m writing a fun little fanfic on AO3 and after someone left a comment (if you’re reading this, still genuinely one of the nicest things anyone has ever said to me about my craft), it occured to me—as a Hazbin Hotel enjoyer, I have a pretty unique perspective on the series as an IRL hospitality professional. So! Thought it would be some cute bonus content to talk a little bit more about my life at an actual hotel and how it’s impacted my experience with Vivziepop’s hit series. 

Please note: this is written purely for shits and giggles. I don’t actually have any issues with the setting of Vivzie’s narrative or how it plays into the stories she and her team want to tell. I fucking love this show, to a potentially unhealthy degree, and I haven’t had this much fun with a series since like…okay well my hyperfixations change like every few months, but still. Point is, this isn’t actually critique, or satire, or anything with negative or critical intentions. TLDR; this post is for funsies, get off my dick.

So Who TF Am I, Anyways?

A little background on myself, for context. I’ve been employed at my hotel for almost a year now, and it’s my first hospitality job. I work in the Sales and Events department and I’ve come to learn that Group Business is actually integral for keeping a hotel up and running. When your average person (read: me before this job) thinks about hotels and traveling, you’d think it’s all about the families, bloggers, and individual travelers when it comes to guests and revenue. But in actuality, most of a hotel’s revenue—at least in the market I work in—will come from contracted room blocks and events. 

That’s where folks in my department come in. We work with clients to negotiate contracts and secure occupants for our hotel year round. Simply put, if we don’t do our jobs well, then no one else gets hours. So as much as the anti-capitalist in me will sometimes hate being a cog in the machine, it is really fulfilling to be able to help clients meet their needs while also making sure my coworkers are able to put food on the table. 

Speaking of being a cog in the machine, because of my role in Sales, this means that whenever I travel or think about hotels, I’m always thinking about the revenue side of things. I also work more with the Events team, so operations are also on the forefront of my mind. Which leads me to my principal quandary for this little blog post:

How in the Hell does the Hazbin Operate?

I have a laundry list of questions. A laundry list that’s almost as big as the actual pile of dirty laundry that is currently plaguing my bedroom floor. I will summarize (which is a generous word given how fucking verbose I can be) below:

Issue #1: Revenue Generation

Okay listen, I know Charlie is the Princess of Hell. I know she probably has unlimited capital, whatever that looks like in the HelluVerse. And I know the Hazbin is literally there to help rehabilitate people so charging them to stay would be counterproductive.

But my dude…do you understand how much money would be needed to run an operation of this scale?

At the end of Season 1, the new Hazbin is huge. Like it easily looks as big, if not bigger, than the hotel I work at which has nearly 500 rooms. Do you know how much revenue our team has to generate to keep this place running? Do you know how many millions our target goal is set at for each quarter? How many hundreds of thousands my coworkers’ individual quotas are set to? And sunshine in a bottle over here doesn’t charge her residents anything????? 

How does she get all those decorations? How does she order food or inventory? We know Hell has an economy, like Angel literally says he needs to save money for drugs in his first appearance. Is she…does she even pay her staff???

It is utterly appalling that Charlie is able to operate a hotel of this scale, both because of how it doesn’t make sense from a business perspective and because there are IRL billionaires that could probably do the same thing and solve homelessness overnight. 

Speaking of scale:

Issue #2: The Hazbin’s Systems, Or Lack Thereof

Okay so, yes, there’s only like…one official resident of the hotel, maybe two if Cherri moves in and doesn’t become a staff member (RIP Pentious, you would have loved living with Cherri Bomb). With the staff the way it is, that’s a solid 5:1 ratio, which is beyond ideal. But—and I touch on this in the fic—I feel I must reiterate: the new Hazbin is fucking massive. And you know what that means? It’s going to be able to hold a lot of guests. Guests that will need staff to take care of them. Let’s review:

Charlie is the owner and mostly teaches classes. Vaggie is the co-owner and kind of acts as the Executive Assistant to Charlie’s General Manager. I guess Alastor is the Hotel Manager? I’m gonna be honest, I have no idea what he does, but generally speaking he’s supposed to be the jack of all trades and manage the rest of the staff. Niffty handles Housekeeping and I guess would be the director of that. Husk is the bartender but like canonically only really eats pub food so he definitely can’t be the Food & Beverage head. 

Let’s say we scrap the Sales and Revenue Departments because clearly they don’t need income, but we keep a Marketing position so that Charlie can get the word out about the hotel. That leaves us with the need for Engineering, Front Desk, Rooms, and F&B staff. And like, not just one person—that would fucking suck—but proper staff. And given their track record of organization and managing the hotel…let’s just say, I would not be applying to the Hazbin Hotel anytime soon. Honestly, it sounds like that job would qualify to be the new tenth circle of Hell. 

What Does the Hazbin Get Right About IRL Hospitality?

So yes, clearly the world of the Hazbin Hotel leans towards the more fanciful—it is a story about Hell after all. However, there have been some moments that have made me chuckle as a hotel employee, things that are relatable for us in the hospitality world. Allow me to highlight them for you below:

Everyone is Bat Shit Crazy

Hospitality professionals are weird. So weird. Before I started my job, I was terrified of the level of professionality I would need to have. When I first got hired, I was given a whole packet on dress code and appropriate conduct. As you can probably tell from my writing style, this was concerning: I can be professional when I need to be, but I cannot maintain that guise for extended periods of time. Call it my toxic trait.

I also already had this impression of poised and put-together hotel staff from my previous experiences with travel. All the Front Desk agents would be in these clean and wrinkle-free clothes with kind yet business-forward attitudes, office workers would be walking around in full suits, and occasionally you’d see the hotel management on the floor if you were looking. Let me tell you now—it is a facade. An act. An incredible stage production unfolding in real time where all the staff do their absolute damndest to make you feel like you are in an organized and professional institution. Not unlike a certain hit animated musical.

My direct supervisor, the literal Director of Catering and Events, once told me that being a liiiiiittle crazy was a prerequisite for working in our department during the hiring process for a new Sales Manager. She was wrong—the prerequisite is not “a little” crazy. The prerequisite is being bat shit insane. And it’s not just our department, oh noooOoooOo, it is every department. Downstairs in our little basement dungeon, we make out of pocket comments, scream at random intervals, and swear way more than we should (that one might be my fault…according to my partner I swear more at work than at home and apparently it’s rubbing off on my colleagues), but that behavior is in no way restricted to just the Sales Team. 

I process the checks that are sent to our property and our Director of Rooms makes me say “can I get a WITNESSSS” before she signs off on the drop log (Charlie-core). If I don’t say it high pitched enough or with enough vigor, she makes me do it again. I once watched a guy in Engineering climb a tall step ladder balanced with two legs on a platform and a third leg balanced on a wooden plank his coworker was holding steady. The fourth leg was over the open air. Let me reiterate: the open. Fucking. Air. Tell me you can’t see Angel Dust and Cherri doing that shit.

Speaking of Engineering, you wanna know what dumbass thing happened just this morning? The Regional Director of the department—regional meaning he manages teams all across our area, like top level type shit—told us about this cursed ass Instagram trend he found where allegedly, putting ketchup on a Kit Kat tasted like fudge. So right there and then, him, myself, and two other coworkers decided ‘why the fuck not?’:

I would never seek it out willingly again, but I honestly didn’t hate it. 

The point of all of this is to say—the antics the Hazbin crew get up to? Totally realistic. I could see my coworker Robert throwing me into an active battlefield against my will. We have deadass done the role playing thing Angel and Pentious did during our trainings, and it was just as unhinged. Every day some shit happens at this hotel and I’m just like, “Yup. That could happen in Hazbin.”

“Call Now! Or Don’t! I Don’t Care! We Still Don’t Have a Working Phone!”

I would like to preface this section by saying: if you happen to be a Front Desk associate, I’m sorry. This is not directed at you, this is directed at your managers and their communication skills that may or may not exist. If you are somehow a manager reading this, uh—first of all, cringe. Second of all, I hope these next few paragraphs don’t apply to you. If they do and you’re offended: that’s a certified you-problem, babes. 

There are three certainties in this life: death, taxes, and miscommunication from your fucking managers. Tell me why in this past week alone I have been in 5 different email threads regarding fuck-ups and complaints from guests about things that we had clearly communicated. Tell me why in these email threads, people were attempting to throw me under the bus or shift the blame to my team. Tell me why I have gone to every single individual office in my department complaining about this. Tell me why this isn’t the first time this has happened.

Another hotel tidbit: across the board, Q1 (Jan-Mar) is supposed to be slow, for all of hospitality. It’s the time to get the metaphorical phone lines working, ya know? Our Q1 was stupidly busy, so I get it, people were slammed and short staffed. But like… we had time. Time to iron out our communication, time to create systems and processes that would ensure we’d be all set when things got busier. Yet here I am at the start of Q2 with an entire fist shoved up my ass being puppeted around to fix other people’s mistakes. 

It’s times like these when I go back to rewatch Hazbin for the like 26th time and I watch Charlie and Alastor run the hotel and I’m just like “whyyYyYyYyYyYy”. Like I KNOW Vaggie has had days where she’s like, “what…what am I supposed to be doing right now? Like what is my job, what… What?” 

It’s not just Front Desk either. It’s every department, even my own bosses. Like the call is coming from inside the house, sweetie, why did you tell this Sales Manager that I was taking care of all her commissions but you didn’t tell me this. Why am I blocking a room for an Orientation the following Monday at fucking 5:45 PM on a Friday. Why am I JUST finding out about a VIP guest when I have been asking you if you had any notes for me for the whole week.

I touch on it in my fic as well but like…pretty sure Charlie just, decides to host her classes day of. And that drives me insane. Like I…there are processes. Things that need to be done so that everyone is on the same page. You don’t just wing this shit, that’s how you end up with Susan calling your Director to tell her that you’re a useless waste of space not even deserving of the air in your lungs because you didn’t give her her fucking breakfast voucher. 

As a character, I love Alastor. If I were ever in the same room as him, I’d probably hate him. But if there’s anything relatable about that Geneva Convention Violation on Legs it’s his absolutely done attitude in Episode 1’s opening commercial.

Charlie Loves Helping People, and So Do We!

Alright, I’ve complained for enough paragraphs, let’s be positive for a second. The thing that is by far the most true to life in Hazbin Hotel is how much joy Charlie gets from taking care of her guests. Like…that’s our bread and butter in the hospitality world. Well, maybe just the butter; we need that bread in the form of cold hard cash (or direct deposits, whatever works best). But as much as I will bitch and moan about the difficulties of working in a hotel, there’s nothing quite as fulfilling as a guest telling you that you made their entire trip better. The butterflies I get reading reviews where my coworkers are mentioned by name and a guest writes about how we completely turned around their bad day are an absolute delight. It just means the world knowing that you can have that kind of impact on someone, even if it’s just in the little things.

In Episode 2, when Charlie and the crew are welcoming Sir Pentious and she just starts vibrating with excitement is exactly how I feel when I get to meet a client that we’ve been working with for months and finally welcome them to our property. When they sing “It Starts With Sorry” and just get to have a moment of empathy and compassion together, it reminds me of the clients and the phone calls I take where I get to ask them about their goals and help them feel like they’re supported and heard. In the grand scheme of things, is a nice phone call or interaction with some hotel employee going to change your life? Probably not. But for those few moments when their burdens seem lighter is why I love my job.

This goes for guests, and for my fellow coworkers. I’ve been very blessed to start my hospitality career in an unusually supportive work culture. Yeah, we can be some right petty bitches sometimes, but overall everyone is so encouraging and so quick to help lighten each other’s loads. Like in Episode 5 (best episode btw, for obvious reasons) when all the Hazbin Crew are working together to prepare the hotel for Lucifer’s arrival, that shit made me so giddy cause like- that’s us! Look at us go! We workin together so hard, we’re so cute! Like when Niffty and Pentious are baking and she looks up at him all excited n’ shit—that’s literally been me working with our Director of Restaurants on new food menus or promotional material. 

There’s something about being in an occupation where your whole purpose is to take care of people that really brings out the selflessness in you, and I think that’s what makes the hotel such a great setting for Charlie’s mission of redemption. I didn’t realize that until writing this paragraph tbh, but yeah, it just kinda…works. When your job is to make sure other people have a good time and feel supported and you’re surrounded by people that make you feel the same way, it’s a lot easier to want to choose to do good, to do right by the people around you. So as much as I have some silly little nitpicks…yeah, I can admit—I love that this show is about the Hazbin Hotel specifically.

Anyways, if you made it this far, thanks for reading! Next update for Life is In Redemption will be out in the days to come, just thought this would be a fun addition while I work on some of the content with my friends. This upcoming chapter is going to have a co-author, so get hyyyyyped :)

[3collecurei]

Homestucktober 2023 (1-5)

1) Patron Troll

Seer gang rise up ✊🏽 (I'd done two classpect tests since 2012 and both times I was a Seer, my aspect just changed from Void to Doom which isn't a good sign lol...although the one I just tried from 4chan is telling me I'm a Page of Void now...I mean I'll take it because it's an aspect I've gotten before but I'm not really trying to be Jake or Tavros out here they both got so screwed over lol)

Anyway if she were my actual patron in a game session I'd be fucking terrified because of what she puts John and Dave through but also probably laughing my ass off at her antics and impressed by her intense sensing ability despite the blindness

2) Favorite Beta Kid

Dave Strider is much needed comedic relief in such a tragic tale and his ramblings are often as deeply philosophical as they are deeply ridiculous. I don't even have the right words to describe all this character has done for me. I'm in love with the Time aspect even though it's probably the last aspect I'd be assigned to because I think Time players have to deal with the multiplicity of the self the most out of everyone (except maybe Space players), and what a fucking difficult thing that must be. I will always wonder how he managed to spend IIRC weeks in the game whereas for everyone else it was just 24 hours (and of course Davesprite spending IIRC four months trying to fix his doomed session...my heart)

3) Favorite Beta Troll

(IIRC the beta trolls are technically the dancestors but I just call the original 12 the betas sometimes because they deal with the beta kids and we meet them first. Anyway)

Again I don't have words enough to describe what Karkat has done for me. Karkat rounding up and trying to lead eleven other insane motherfuckers and losing his cool often but almost always asserting, in his way, that it's because he deeply cares. You really see this in Act 6 Post Murderstuck when we find him in Openbound and he's obviously dealing with the weight of having failed at leadership so hard that over half of his teammates are dead. It probably took him a while of raging at how long the meteor trip would be (and upset Sollux didn't stay after "dying" in front of him again) before the sadness set in, but if there's one thing Karkat isn't, it's afraid of emotion. Also the PCG, CCG, FCG conversations remain some of my favorites in the entire canon, especially the one where FCG berates CCG for "wanting [Terezi] in every quadrant like a desperate fool." If there's one thing I can relate to about Karkat it's that I will also always read past me for filth even if it's hard. I use it as a form of self pruning and improvement and eventually I think FCG gets that too.

4) Favorite Alpha Kid

It was Dirk for a long time until maybe the last year or two, but I realized after re-reading the Epilogues that relating to him as much as I do is probably really bad lol, but Roxy was always a close second. Obsessed with the fact that the wild alcoholic, who one might think would be the worst team member because of that, instead sobers up and fully embodies John's role as the "friendleader" which is why I think they end up getting along so well. Despite the obstacles Roxy is full of love for their friends, and with friends like the people who they end up becoming in the Epilogues, you gotta hand it to them for their persistence. Considering that they were in a Void session their positivity throughout was pretty amazing to me, also shout out to them for fully embracing Calliope's skull appearance and finding them beautiful anyway. Alien love wins

5) Favorite Alpha Troll

Okay but can we talk about the fact that she ends up alive??? As a huge stan of hers since we started seeing her I was fucking living my best life lol I can't hate it whatsoever even though it was at John's expense 😭 Meenah's one of the most determined characters in the entire thing fr, she really said "fuck being dead for millions of years after isolating myself on the moon to avoid responsibility, now I want all the responsibility, all of it." Fully meets Karkat again in Candy and is like "lemme reverse what HIC did and use my ancient Queen powers to benefit the mutant," imo an incredible foil to her future self even though they're very much the same troll and speak pretty much exactly the same. Fish puns are hysterical to me most of the time, her unwavering dedication to the shtick 4x as hard as Feferi did it and editing/improving ones she doesn't like in the middle of her sentences 😂 I cosplayed as her at AX 2013 and had a blast, except for that Cronus cosplayer who tried to hit on me in character, I had no idea what to do lmao

[sssammich]

fanfic writer questions

Thanks for the tag, @foibles-fables

1- How many works do you have on AO3?

i'm at 122 right now (wahoo!)

2. What's your total AO3 word count?

794,634 (i am on a mission to 1 million in the next couple of years)

3. What fandoms do you write for?

well i've been around many a fandom block, but i'd say for current brainrot:

supergirl (mostly supercorp, but i have a smattering of rare pairs because women, amirite?)

swan queen

bumbleby (i also still have so many rosebird dreams i'll get there someday)

makayuro (with a smattering of rare pairs also because women, amirite?)

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

well unsurprisingly, ever since plopping down on supercorp fandom, the numbers have been from there. but shoutout to my victorious fic from 2012 holding strong lol

evergreen, closest i get, not for nothing, you've got mail, and one way or another

5. Do you respond to comments?

yes yes absolutely!! sometimes i am late and sometimes i just leave it in there so i can have it stay unread but anyway i try to respond and i appreciate everyone who sends them to me. i have historically been a oneshot writer so it's been nice also to get comments on wips!

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

oh shoot angstiest ending?? well i think i would say my supercorptober ficlet about memory loss of sorts might tick that (it ends kinda idk open but not bad, i will say)

but then there's also this one old soccer RPF i wrote that's more, idk, poetry than any real fic about one of them leaving lmao

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

the happiest ending? i mean all of them, i reckon. if they end up together or have a promise of together then they count lmao

8. Do you get hate on fics?

uhhh none that i've seen? i mean if it's in the comments, no? but if it's elsewhere, then also no? i have been fortunate in that way

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

OMG YES I AM FINALLY IN MY SMUT ERA

uh i reckon comedy smut for now (read DickFic here) but the day is young and my doc is empty so who's to say

but i have dreams for some sad smut because i'd like to develop the range LMAO

10. Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written?

surprisingly, i do not. what i instead do is just little spin through five fandoms at any given time and just confuse myself that way

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

unfortunately yes. twice now. once was for my victorious fic that was used for a 5th harmony RPF lmaooo

and then on thanksgiving weekend, the first chapter of Crepe AU was posted by an anonymous for a The Wilds ship (but my friends rallied to get it taken down so i didn't have to send a takedown form to ao3 while i was traveling home)

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

nope but that would be totally rad

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

i love fic writing group work so yes! i have a series of sad angsty women that i have with my best friend in my revue starlight fandom, and then, of course, @sideguitars and i have 'humans in the storeroom' (that reminds me it's my turn to write the next part smh)

i also like jumping into writing sprints or writing exercises with folks (like a round robin)

14. What's your all time favorite ship?

let's not do this, i shan't pick amongst my children

15. What's a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

so far all my wips are things i wanna finish and will do my best to finish. i have a couple of retired wips that will just sit in my ao3 forever and i have made peace with them, though.

16. What are your writing strengths?

i wanna say characterization, pacing, emotional resonance, and a simple and natural writing style maybe

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

action?? plot??? proper AUs lmao

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

i do not because i find i butcher it and also then i cringe lmao

19. First fandom you wrote for?

oh written for but never posted? hermione/ginny

posted for? god probably All My Children (bianca and maggie) when i was like a teenager hahahahaha

20. Favorite fic you've written?

sorry no can do i love them all because i wrote them and there are so many things i enjoy about them. but i will say that the writing events circuit i've done this past year (supercorp bigbang, bumbleby big bang, and swan queen winter solstice) are born out of a lot of labor of love and i'm really proud of the work i've done for them.

and not for a writing event, but i am also extremely proud of re:live for mayakuro fandom-- that one makes me think that if i never wrote for that fandom again, that that's a really good fic to end on)

No-pressure tags, of course: @sideguitars, @eqt-95, @fazedlight, @luthordamnvers, @vox-ex, and @waytooinvested

(yall have probably done this before but here it just in case!)

[deathmetalunicorn1]

What if Jack,Hercules, Hermes, Thor, Hlokk, and any other characters you want got sucked through a portal and meet there au dog counterparts and there owner who is a single mom and her daughters one is in her teens and the other is a toddler who just learned how to walk steady on her feet.

•Dog Jack and dog Hercules like to walk the older daughter to and from the bus stop, they live on a farm in the country so the bus stop (which is basically a tree with a bench underneath it) is a long,long way from the house.

•Dog Jack has his own puppy a little female who is the runt of the litter. His owner breed him with a Great Dane female who belonged to an acquaintance and then when the pups were sold they went there separate ways. All the other puppies got sold but they let Jack keep this one since they became so attached to each other,Hlokk is pretty much her big sister (or should I say small sister, even a runt from a half Great Dane litter would be kinda tall.).

•Hlokk can tell it’s them cuz of her keen nose,Jack made a comment in an extra chapter that she has a keen nose. And if that wasn’t enough to convince them the dogs even have the same names as them and look exactly like them lol.

•Each dog has there own role to play on the farm like for example:

•guarding the house and the barn at night.

•rounding up the hens if they get loose.

•chasing foxes and or raccoons out of the hen house.

•herding the sheep.

•keeping predators like wolves and cougars out of the horse corral and barn.

•making sure the cats doing it’s job as pest control eating rats,mice,snakes,etc

.•babysitting (yes Jack and or Hercules babysit BOTH daughters even if the older says she doesn’t need it. They know she likes the company.).

•being escorts for the girls is one of them (a self assigned role) they both get a hug a kiss and an I love you before she says goodbye and gets on the bus and when she gets of the bus.

This was fun, but reading your posts on the dogs to use, I couldn't help but wonder what a Soft Coated Wheaten Terrier and a Great Dane mutt would look like. Great Danes are short, coated breeds, so I'm curious if it would have longer fur or not. Great thinking question and an interesting idea for a post. Thank you.

-It started with an accident, a magic spell gone wrong, spiriting away 2 gods, 2 demi-gods, and 1 human, dropping them in front of a large farmhouse.

-A young teen girl had been on the porch, and she ran inside, calling for her mother who quickly ran out, the teen holding a toddler in her arms, peeking out from behind her mother.

-The magic seal that brought them to you was still glowing as you put your hands on your hips, eyes narrowing, “What magic brought you here?”

-Hermes and Thor were a bit surprised you knew about magic, as you were a human, but Hermes was the one to speak, “A magic spell gone wrong. We overestimated the power needed to teleport across Valhalla and wound up here. How is it that you know of magic?”

-You smiled, almost mysteriously, “It’s not the first time I’ve had guests like you lot.”

-Loud barking filled the air and attention turned to two large dogs charging towards the group, with a third, smaller dog running behind them.

-The dogs put themselves in between your new guests and your family, growling darkly until you told them to stand down, as they were distrustful of strangers.

-You grinned at the guests, “Sorry about that, Hercules, Jack, and little Hlokk here aren’t too fond of strangers.”

-Eyes went wide and jaws dropped, looking at the three massive dogs, a Soft Coated Wheaten Terrier, who’s long facial fur looked strangely similar to Jack’s mustache, and a Carpathian Shepard, who was massive, but once you told him to stand down, he was sitting down with his tail wagging a million miles per hour, reminding them all of a certain Greek demigod. Hlokk was a mutt, half Wheaten Terrier, half Great Dane, she was smaller than her father, Jack, but was still a large dog, wearing a bright pink collar around her neck.

-You were surprised to learn the names of your guests, a giggle bubbling out of you before Hermes surmised that they were in an alternate dimension, where they were all animals instead of being gods or a human in Jack’s case.

-Hercules initially was unsure of this idea, until Glokk spoke, pointing at her nose, “No, Hermes is right, your scents are both very similar, plus they look like you.”

-Hercules was quick to accept it, quickly bonding with Hercules while your Jack trotted over to their Jack and sat beside him, looking up at him as if he was expecting pats, which he quickly got, looking content.

-You introduced yourself before your two daughters, Michelle, or Mickey as she prefers, and your toddler, Poppy.

-Mickey was a bit uneasy with these guests, being a bit distrustful, while Poppy was giggling brightly, waving her arms out towards Thor who was a bit surprised that the toddler didn’t look afraid of him at all.

-Hermes was able to calculate that he could get them all back to their own dimension, but it would take a day or two, and you didn’t hesitate to welcome them into your home.

-Hercules teased Hermes when Poppy saw your black cat that you kept on the farm for pest control, carrying him over, the cat looking calm and wasn’t fighting, “Hermy!”

-Hermes was amused that he was a cat, the two quickly liking each other, as they were so similar in personality.

-Mickey was a bit wary around the men, as they were strangers, until Jack saw her reading Shakespeare and her eyes lit up with sparkles as she was finally able to have someone to talk to!!

-Mickey also bonded with Hlokk, who, while shorter, became like a big sister, talking about clothes.

-Poppy on the other hand adored both Thor and Hercules, hugging their legs, beaming up at them when she managed to toddle over to them.

-The next day Jack and Hercules watched as your Jack and Hercules walked Mickey off of the farm, taking her to the school bus stop about a half a mile up the road, the two men following after, speaking with Mickey, curious about where she was going.

-Thor got to meet his animal, a large reddish colored bull, who looked calm, but Thor could easily sense the power and the two had a stare off for what felt like forever.

-Your Hermes had a job of pest control, keeping rats and other rodents away from the crops, as well as handling any intruders in the chicken coop, while your beloved canines handled with security, letting you know of any trespassers, humans or animals.

-You enjoyed having the few extra helping hands on the farm, as Hercules and Thor got into a competition over who could haul the most hay bales to the barns, while both of the Hlokk’s looked after Poppy.

-Jack tended to your vegetable garden, finding weeding it quite relaxing and Hermes was inside your home, with your permission, preparing lunch for everyone, while you were walking your cows out to their pasture to graze.

-When Mickey got off the bus she beamed, “Where’s my favorite boys?! Where’s my kisses?!” she instantly flushed, seeing both sets of Hercules and Jack there as the two dogs ran over while Jack chuckled warmly at her.

-You had to admit they were good company to keep, seeing the healthy appetites all around the room, including your own girls, was refreshing, but it was fun to keep feeding them until most were in food comas.

-Hermes was the only one who remained awake, sitting beside you on the porch swing, his head on your shoulder as he tried to stay awake, “May I ask, why weren’t you freaked out by seeing us?” you chuckled softly, rocking the swing lightly, “As I said, you’re not the first visitors I’ve had. The first one showed up when I was still pregnant with Poppy, right after my husband abandoned us and the farm. He was a funny man, but Mickey liked him, and he was kind enough to help me around the farm for a while after I gave birth.”

-Hermes was a bit curious, tilting his head up, “Oh? May I ask who that was?”

-You smiled softly, remembering your friend fondly, as he was funny but also mischievous, “His name was Loki.”

-Hermes snorted into his hand, laughing out loud while you smiled lightly as he thought it was hysterical that Loki came here first and helped you out.

-You leaned back, “Don’t mention that I told you about him, he was quite shy when he would talk about his family, like they didn’t want him finding out about where he had been. But if you see him, I have a Billy goat that’s a little shit just like him.”

-Cue round two of laughter.

-The following morning you, Mickey, and Poppy all wished your new friends well as you saw them off.

-They each said goodbye to their animal counterparts, except for Thor, who lifted his hand to his face, pointing two fingers at his eyes before he pointed them at the bull and only Thor saw the bull lift his hoof to his face before pointing back at Thor.

-Poppy was crying, not wanting to say goodbye, the same with Mickey, who didn’t want to lose her big sister and the first father figure she’s had in years.

-You were the only calm one, as your farm was a hot spot for events like this. You had a feeling this wouldn’t be the last you see of them.