#rotating things in my head

[stropharian-world]

Something different - I've been meaning to draw a new PFP for discord/s.media for a while. This one was inspired by this post: (for some reason I can't link it here)

[timethehobo]

When I’m too tired I scribble more casual faves.

[hinamie]

green

[limblesstar]

i need my pre dnd nap if i wanna survive til 3 am but also. i wanna stay up and think about knives [REDACTED]

[ronanlynchbf]

[snarkspawn]

Let There Be Light

[bluuscreen]

god of the wind / god of the stars

[huginsmemory]

Been thinking about how Bill legitimately had a horrifying reason (the literal progressive disintegration of the nightmare realm that erases whatever it disintegrates from existence completely) to move himself and his crew into a new dimension. Like that's terrifying. And yet he never utilizes this to his favour. He could have been honest about this with Ford, and you KNOW as long as Bill didn't mention plans of overtaking the earth, Ford would've made the portal for him, both out of Ford's own interest and because Ford when faced with these big moral questions will pull through. But this is a card Bill NEVER plays because although he needs to leave the dimension, he cannot lose face. He can't put aside his pride and admit to the humility that he needs to flee from his dimension, that he's not actually all powerful. And so instead he pretends to be a muse and when Ford figures out something else is going on, instead of being open and humble and saying that his dimension is unravelling, Bill focuses on that he's going to over take earth, that he's actually been a monster all along, surprise Ford!

And part of it is definitely because Bill's built himself up on power and violence and to grovel and earnestly ask for help, to admit that he cannot stop the unraveling of his dimension completely invalidates that; showing vulnerability? Can't do that, even under the guise of lying to get his way. And part of it makes you wonder if it's also a form of self-sabotage, because underneath his deep denial Bill is guilty over what he occurred; he sees himself as a monster and so he'll be that monster, and having people recognize that feels good in the same way that pressing a bruise feels good. But it makes you wonder what would've happened if Bill even just was open about his dimension unravelling and had lied about overtaking the earth.

It's also interesting because although Bill has SOME charisma and can manipulate people decently well (as evidenced by his cult, and pandering to people's desires with Ford, Mabel and Blendin), he refuses to be vulnerable, refuses to not be true to his off-putting self, even when if he was just vulnerable of pretended to not be himself, to put aside the (false) pride he has in himself he would've gotten a portal by now. and part of me wonders if it's because it's this false pride that built on insecurity and denial on who he is he cannot drop that mask.

Further thoughts on this!

[raepliica]

(content warning: blood)

Sewed Up Heart

[ID: A Trigun comic done in grayscale with red accents. First, an anatomical heart gushes blood, forming a puddle which shifts into Vash's coat. Vash's gloved hands can be seen sewing up a tear at the hem.

Vash raises his hands, which are now bare and covered in blood. He looks sweaty and distressed, and he raises his coat to his face and cries into it. His clenched hands rip the sewed portion apart, and the red thread leads to a heart whose own stitches are tearing apart. The background gets darker and darker, and the red looks brighter and starker against it.

Then the background returns to white, and brown-skinned hands using embroidery scissors snip a red thread. Wolfwood holds up Vash's repaired coat, grinning proudly, and does a happy thumbs-up in Vash's direction. Vash lifts his head, seeming distant.

Wolfwood holds out the coat. As Vash puts out his hand to take it, the cloth is replaced so Wolfwood is dropping a sewed-up heart in Vash's hand. Vash rubs the coat against his face with a teary smile. End ID] ID CREDITS

[call-of-the-ocean]

Perception (Sight)

[silicated]

childhood moments

[vvitchllng]

Imogen Temult you will live in my brain forever what if You were born to parents who loved you but not enough and you grew up in a town that held you at arms length for the power you were cursed born with so you clutched at that power instead but it never filled you just made you ache with the emptiness they left you with.

And then you meet a woman just like you who’s been so lonely and empty and cold for so so long and you hold her hand and think maybe you’re enough for each other maybe this is what you’ve been searching for all along and then there’s a whole group of people who you grow to love and who love you but at the same time there’s still that storm inside you, a howling raging emptiness that only seems to grow as you get stronger and it’s calling you. It holds your mother in its grasp as bait and you know it’s a trap but you’ve been starving for her love all your life so you go to her over and over again, can’t help yourself from trying to gorge on the crumbs of affection she gives despite the warnings from your friends.

It works and you save her but now you’re confronted with that starving entity that lives inside you birthed you cursed you is you and it’s threatening your friends while still calling to you like it’s home so you take it into you. And at first its hunger is so much stronger than yours and you’re consumed instead but then. Well. You’re alone in a void with the remnants of a god and your friends are in danger and you’re powerless but maybe you don’t have to be. You’re a predator too as you consume the remnants of a god and tilt your head at the next one. You’re a predator too you think as you stare up at the gargantuan form of the hunger that raised you and claim it for your own, take it into you like maybe this will finally satisfy you.

Now you’re stumbling out from the battles that nearly killed you coming face to face with the people who are supposed to be on your side (you’re supposed to be One Of Them why can they never See That ) and they’re afraid of you. They look at you and see something Wrong in you but this time you’re strong enough. This time they have to listen to you because this time you’re finally full of enough power to make them understand.

[salamispots]

more progress

[lucidicer]

MUSTARRRRRRRRRRD!!!!

[raspberrypossums]

I think about the fact that Kremy probably learned or thought he could only trust himself and no one else but slowly over time Gid became the exception to that. It went from always looking out for himself to always looking out for himself and Gideon

In every escape plan, every get away, anything, even when he’s like cursed to not trust anyone, Gid’s always an exception to that

Like theyre so inescapably tied together

They make me ill

[wayward-banana]

Idk how to cope with whatever just happened (DDD moment) so I reverted to system default and put them all in dresses. can you forgive me