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lucyhblack · 6 months ago

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Doom explosion!

Warnings: Fontcest, but precisely Honeymustard.

Animal birth, but nothing graphic.

Curse words?

Summary: When the phone rang, Stretch expected a lot of things, except that situation involving the Fell brothers' pet cat.

In this story I'm using my headcanon that the monsters, when they reached the surface, had land given to them to live on. A monster barrier was erected (which is why in the game's post-credits we see monsters, but not humans) for protection.

Each time a UA manages to reach the surface (all leaving the same cave on Mtt. Ebott) the terrain magically increases.

The monsters are not limited or trapped within the barrier, but to leave they must obtain authorization from the Embassy (and often be escorted, at least in the first few years). The same goes for humans who want to enter monster territory.

***

When the phone rang, Stretch was expected many things.

His brother asking how he was, maybe an invitation from Slim to smoke, even an invitation from Sans to help him come up with some more puns... and even a call from some human telemarketer, even though, theoretically, he couldn't receive that kind of call.

(but it had happened before and he half expected it to happen again, just so he could record it and rub it in Lab's scaly face). He definitely didn't expect to hear his boyfriend's breathless voice.

-Tresh

For an absurd moment he thought it was Edge calling him trash, until his mind filtered the tone (and volume) and realized it wasn't his double.

-Red? – Stretch sat down on the bed immediately.

There was something about the way his boyfriend's breath came out that made him instantly alert and tense, ready to take a shortcut if necessary

-What is was?!

-I... I think...

A choked breath and Stretch stood up, wanting to rush Red, but knowing it wouldn't be a good thing. If he was injured or in trouble, interrupting him could do more harm than good.

-There is something wrong with Doom.

It took Stretch a few seconds for his mind to come out of "jump to action" mode and decipher the phrase Red said.

-Um... Doomfanger? – he wanted to confirm that he hadn’t heard wrong.

-Of course Doomfanger! – Red exploded and Stretch grimaced.

Ok, Red wasn't very tolerant of stupid questions normally, being clearly nervous as he was it was clear that he would bite at the first opportunity.

-Ok... what's wrong?

-I don't know... it... it got into my wardrobe and is meowing strangely... I tried to catch him, but it attacked me...

Stretch held his tongue before he could ask why he was calling him. Honestly, Stretch should be the last option (ok, not the last. He would probably be above Axe, whose only help would be to suggest adding potatoes and cooking it over low heat, or slicing the cat and serving it with soy sauce) Red should have looked at...he had no experience with animals!

(In his universe he had had a pet mushroom, true, but his mushroom was very low maintenance. Just a little edible glitter and dusting every now and then – both things Sans did, not him – and he was perfectly fine The Annoying Dog didn't 't count, he was more like Alphys, who occasionally showed up to eat or sleep on his couch)

-Hum... Why don't you call the Edgelord?

-Boss is on duty today! He's in a meeting with the higher-ups, discussing security things.

Oh damn!

If it was like that, then Red wouldn't be able to talk to Edge until after the meeting, which could take a while considering that it was the first security meeting with the new universe that had joined the surface.

-OK. What do you want me to do? – he finally asked. It seemed like the safest question to ask at the moment.

The silence on the other end of the line said that, despite his best attempt, his question had been especially stupid (which would make Stretch angry too, after all what did Red expect him to do?) or, hopefully , he was thinking about a course of action.

Before the Fell skeleton's response arrived, Stretch heard a strange, prolonged wailing noise.

-Hey! Was that Doom? – he asked alarmed.

He had never heard the cat make that sound (and considering what vocal the little beast's was, he imagined he had heard all kinds of bizarre noises from the feline, from the baby meow it made to ask for a piece of whatever was eating, until the ear-piercing scream it made when Blue stepped on his tail once).

-Help please! – was Red's response. And Red's completely destroyed tone was enough to put all that urgency from the beginning of the conversation back into Stretch.

-I'll be there in a minute!

He said, already going down the stairs and running to the crumpled shoe at the front door, it was better to be prepared in case he had to take the beast somewhere (and let's not think about where. He honestly didn't want to remember that if the cat was really in trouble there would be no one inside the barrier to look for. There were practically no animals underground, so no monster had practice dealing with them. The best he could do is take it to one of the Torieis and hope that healing magic could solve any type of problem).

He hung up the phone and opened the front door, heading left, around the corner of his house and emerging on the right corner of the Fell brothers' house (blessed are shortcuts!). He headed straight for the back door, waving her into Edge's spotlessly clean kitchen..

-Up here!

Another of those half-groan meows, much more disturbing in person than on the cell phone, followed Red's words, who let out his own squeal of suffering.

Even though Red was always complaining about the furball, he loved the feline as much as Edge. In fact, Red spoiled Doomfanger more than the “official owner” himself.

Stretch climbed two steps at a time and entered Red's room, seeing the said skeleton kneeling in front of his wardrobe, which looked like it had been attacked. It looked like a bomb had gone off, scattering socks, underwear and blouses on the floor. In a way, it even looked like his own closet in Underground.

(He had quickly learned that on the surface if he left his clothes lying around something called dust would accumulate on them and the feeling of it against his bones and especially in his nasal passages was something he would definitely avoid at all costs, even going so far as to have to do your own cleaning and more weekly washing).

When he entered Red turned to him and Stretch felt his chest tighten. The reddish lights, normally just ovals, were dilated to look almost like circles in their despair. There were no traces of tears on his face, but Stretch could see the way his eye sockets looked irritated.

He could count the times he had seen Red in such a broken state. It took something very serious to make Red react this way, and normally, he only broke down like this when it got to the point where he not only didn't know how to deal with the situation, but he didn't know who to turn to to try and fix it.

Without saying anything he walked over and knelt down next to Red.

The Fell brothers' big cat had crept into the back of the closet, in the part where Red kept his shoes. He appeared to have pushed some away and was lying on his side in a pair of fluffy red slippers (Stretch didn't even know Red had anything like that, but he suspected it must have been a gift from Comic from some past Christmas).

There was something definitely wrong with the cat. His belly was rising and falling at a fast pace and despite his eyes being open, they were dilated and glassy.

Stretch reached out to try and touch the feline, but as soon as his hand hovered over its shaggy fur, the animal turned to him and let out one of its banshee screams (which he knew well from when Edge tried to bathe it) and its paw front came flying to hit his fingers.

Stretch retracted his quick fingers, not concerned with the claws really (nails don't usually win when faced with bones), but with the feline's intent. Even though his HP was in the 2 digits, and the feline couldn't inflict more than 1 point (0.5 probably) he preferred not to get hurt unnecessarily.

The cat stared at him with its ears back and its teeth bared, snorting at him. As soon as Stretch stepped back, letting his hand fall to his side, the animal lost all fury and laid its head on one side again, letting out a plaintive meow.

Red beside him imitated the feline with his own groan of suffering.

Okay, there was definitely something with the feline, and as it was, it would be difficult to get him out of there. He preferred not to have to use magic, but perhaps it was necessary.

The problem was who to take it to.

His first option would be Tori, but what if it was something serious and she couldn't cure it? Would it be better to take him straight to the embassy and get a pass outside the barrier to take him to a human veterinarian? He should call Edge, he would want to know where they were taking his cat...

Doomfanger suddenly stood up and bent over, putting his face under his tail and licking his parts.

-He's been doing this from time to time. – Red spoke for the first time and Stretch looked at him. The short skeleton didn't turn its lights away from the cat. - He meows, lies down then licks himself, lies down again and repeats the cycle...

Red finally looked away and looked at Stretch.

-What's wrong with him, Stretch?

The question broke his non-existent heart. He reached out a hand and squeezed his shoulder. It was so rare to see Red like this.

And now he understood why Red had called him instead of someone more useful like Black or Comic – who had experience with animals, even if in Black's case indirectly.

Even though Red had become more open with others, it would still be difficult for him to let anyone see him so helpless (and despite the situation, he couldn't help but be moved when he realized how much Red trusted him).

A sound broke the moment and they both saw Doomfanger lift his head and begin to pant. The mouth open and the eyes glazed over without seeing.

-Okay, that's it. We have to do something!

Red got to his feet resolutely, but just started pacing in circles.

Only now did Stretch notice that Red's tail was wrapped tightly around his waist, another indication that he was frustrated and nervous.

It had been years since Red hid his tail, but when he was very stressed he had the habit of curling it or hiding it (Stretch didn't know if it was to hide his discomfort or a way to control something in an out-of-control situation).

With one last look at Doom, he too rose to his feet. Apparently Red's practical mind had gone for a walk, it was time for him to take control (he would later think how fucked up the situation was, that he had to make executive decisions like that).

Grabbing Red's shoulders he stopped him and forced him to face him.

-Where is the carrier?

Red blinked blankly before understanding finally came.

-In Boss's room, under the bed.

Waving, he left Red and went to Edge's room.

Stopping in front of the door, he hesitated for a moment, staring at the “Caution, enter at your own risk” sign and the barbed wire embedded in the wood. It would be better if Red were the one to go into his brother's room, but he couldn't come back empty-handed now and tell Red that he hadn't taken the box out of some stupid sense of privacy. After all, he was going to look for something to save Edge's damn cat, not to snoop into the other's things.

Making his decision he turned the doorknob (hoping that Edge hadn't placed any kind of trap there. Given the lack of shock he figured he had left these tricks underground) and quickly entered.

The room was perfectly clean, not even a sock out of place. Even the posters on the wall were aligned with surgical precision (Stretch vaguely wondered if Edge had calculated not just the height, but even the spacing between them).

Stretch strode over to the bed (an ordinary single bed with a wooden frame, despite the blood red color of the wood) and bent down, retrieving the box from beneath it. He was just getting up when Red's scream almost made him drop the box.

-STRETCH!!!

The tall skeleton turned quickly, running away and crashing into the doorframe on his way out.

He almost collided with Red at the entrance to his room.

-What it was?!! – He asked, alarmed, seeing the paleness of his skull and how his boyfriend's lights were even brighter. A cold dread climbed his ribs.

-He... he... I think he... exploded...

Stretch dropped the box and stared blankly at Red.

Explode? He was a cat! A damn surface cat, not even a monster cat, it wouldn't explode like one of Mettaton's bombs!

Of course Doomfanger seemed very fat lately (also with the amount of treats that Red (and himself) gave the cat, it was no wonder, but then to say that he had exploded was an exaggeration.

Ignoring the other skeleton he went to the wardrobe, trying to prepare himself for what he would see.

Bending down, he peeked out and saw with relief the entire cat, folded over again, licking its backside. There was a dark stain underneath it, but from the poor lighting he couldn't tell if it was blood or if the cat had urinated on itself. Whichever it was definitely didn't seem to be enough for Red to say that the cat had exploded.

Something caught his attention and looking for his cell phone in his hoodie he turned on the flashlight and pointed it at the cat. What he saw made his orbs widen in astonishment.

-Hum... Red? - he called. The short skeleton stopped wailing in the hallway and cautiously entered the room, but stopped far from the closet.

-He... is he dead? – he asked in a low voice.

Stretch looked at the closet and grimaced before looking back at Red.

-Definitely not. And I know what's wrong with him.

Red's shoulders sagged in relief immediately at Stretch's words and he moved a little closer.

-What is it?

-It's not him... It's her.

Red blinked.

His words certainly didn't make the slightest sense to him. Stretch controlled the urge to laugh, if he started he wouldn't be able to stop for sure.

-What? -Red spoke in a hollow voice.

Stretch decided to elaborate.

-Doomfanger is not a male, but a female... at least biologically speaking. – he really didn’t need to get into the gender discussion of animals. – And you are a great-uncle.

The two stared at each other in silence for a moment. Stretch trying not to laugh at Red's blank expression.

Red's "brow" bone began to crease and before it turned into a full frown, a meow caught their attention and Stretch turned towards the wardrobe as Red ran to kneel beside him. As soon as the other fell to his knees beside him, Stretch turned the flashlight to the scene and added in a low, soft voice,

-He didn't explode, she's having kittens!

As soon as he finished speaking, the baby's hind legs finally came loose and Doom began to lick his firstborn.

Stretch wasn't sure what color the kitten would be. In the glow of the flashlight the little creature looked like just a pinkish thing with a few gray spots and the suggestion of what might be fur once dried (honestly, Stretch tried not to think about the ham that had once gone bad in the back of his refrigerator).

A sharp sound caught his attention and Stretch turned to see Red.

One look at the skeleton next to him and he wondered if the red lights would ever return to being the thin ovals after this day.

Red's lights were perfect circles fixed on the scene of the mother cat cleaning her offspring. Slowly he turned around and faced Stretch who couldn't contain the small snort of laughter.

Stars, he looked like a bad imitation of Blue with the lights like that!!

Red blinked and then opened his mouth, only to close it with a snap and continue to stare at Doom in amazement. After two more attempts, he finally blurted out a shy:

-Holy crap.

Stertch laughed again. Well, that summed up the issue perfectly.

They watched until Doom abandoned the cub and began licking himself again. Now with the flashlight Stretch could see that the second baby was on the way. Red stood up suddenly, repeating a litany of “no, no, nope, nope” and leaving the room.

Stretch snorted once again, laughing and picking up Red's cell phone (who had dropped it on the floor as soon as Stretch arrived minutes ago) he turned on his flashlight and started filming with his.

Red might not want to watch, but if Edge wanted to, he was sure he would record everything for when "grandpa" got home.

Hours later (hell, someone could have told him this would take hours, his arms were throbbing and his hipbone was killing him from sitting on the hard floor) he got up and went to collect the cardboard box that Red had pushed into the room some time ago, mumbling to call him as soon as EVERYTHING was over.

Considering that Doom had laid down after licking the last kitten and was now purring while the little naked balls (don't think ham!) whimpered the tiniest mewls he'd ever heard, he was pretty confident that the fifth one was the last.

Carefully he approached and touched Doomfanger's head who purred louder.

-Good job momy! – he praised her by giving her one last rub between her ears and, very carefully, held one of the babies.

He was tiny and so fragile!

Her entire little body could fit in the palm of a hand. The little animal moved, meowing softly and Sretch brought it closer to his face, seeing the round face and tiny crushed ears. In some ways he didn't look much like a cat.

Shrugging, he placed it inside the box that had the bottom covered with a towel and a folded pillowcase.

He picked up each one and deposited them inside the box. It was still difficult to know what color some were, but Stretch was sure that a couple would have darker coats (gray or maybe black).

No idea who the daddy would be (and that would be Edge's problem, but he wanted to see Edge chasing the neighborhood cats, yelling about child support and parental duties, he wanted it!).

Doomfanger got up and entered the box alone, settling down next to the cubs, still purringand looking at him with his yellowish green eyes as if to say: “See what I did?”.

Well after all the hard work she had every right to be proud!

Holding the box carefully he left the room and went after his boyfriend. He found him on the living room couch, staring at the turned off TV. His lights weren't as wide as last time, but they were still bigger than normal and his cautious, nervous expression remained. He glanced at the box before looking back at Stretch with a mix of feelings that Stretch couldn't quite figure out (apprehension and confusion, but something else too).

-There are 5 pkitties, Great-uncle!

Red grimaced and stood to peer into the box. Stretch bent down and deposited her on the couch. Red leaned in and Doom instantly turned her hooded eyes to him, her purring even louder as she stared at Red as if awaiting his verdict.

Red reached out a tentative finger before running it down the back of one of the cubs. Her shoulders sagged as if a weight had been lifted from them and her smile widened impossibly as her lights shone brightly.

-Heh, heh, you almost killed my heart you stinky furball! – he complained affectionately scratching under Doomfanger's chin. - And I don't even have one!

Stretch threw himself onto the vacant cushion, almost crying with relief at the softness against his injured bottom. Red made a sound of displeasure, but a quick glance told him that the small jolt his carcass caused to the couch didn't affect the mother or her cubs.

Taking out his cell phone once again, he began to prepare the message he was going to send (and kept in his memory the collection of precious – and hilarious – expressions that Red had shown him today).

***

When the meeting was finally over, Edge was more than ready to go home, take a nice hot shower, and spend a few hours stretched out on his bed reading a good book (one that preferably didn't have hard-headed ex-rulers, who didn't realize that were no longer underground and had to adapt to the new reality of the surface and a shared government).

While waiting for the elevator he took out his cell phone and saw that there were several new messages.

He hated not being able to answer the phone, but once on the surface and with the number of contacts increasing, he understood that he could not answer a call in the middle of a mportant crisis, only to be Science trying to order a pizza and dialing the wrong number or Stretch sending him some obscure meme).

If a real emergency occurred, Red or one of the others knew to call the embassy number. Goss would be happy to interrupt them, even if they were in a top secret meeting or just the decision to paint the embassy neon purple.

He scanned the messages, debating whether he should start reading them in order of arrival (when they were received), the order they appeared on his screen, or simply his mental list of priorities.

By force of habit he ended up clicking on his brother's first. There was just one message: “Look what Stretch sent you and congratulations!!”

Frowning he hesitated to click on the Ashtray icon (literally, he had put the image of a cheap orange ashtray as his “brother-in-law's” contact image), but curiosity was already burning and whether it was a stupid joke or some scheme stupid of those two worm brains, it was better to find out soon (a part of his mind assured him that it couldn't be a big deal, after all there was no call from Crocs, or Revenge which meant that whatever it was didn't end up at the police station or in the hospital).

The message was a huge “CONGRATULATIONS GRANDPA!!!” complete with ribbons and virtual confetti followed by several celebratory emojis and a collection of cat emojis.

Frowning even more he scrolled and saw that there was a video below.

He snorted, already imagining some Tick Tok video of some elderly human losing his teeth while blowing out the candles on a birthday cake (for some bizarre reason he and Silm seemed to find the epitome of fun the idea that humans would make fake teeth to stick themselves on in their mouths. He couldn't understand the funny, especially when one had a gold tooth implant and the other was dating someone who also had a dental implant).

Clicking on the video he didn't immediately identify what he was seeing. It looked like the back of someone's closet, then he saw the white furball that was his cat. He pulled his cell phone closer and turned up the volume, identifying Stretch's low voice encouraging Doomfanger.

If the damn ashtray was convincing Doomfanger to destroy his shoes (even though he doesn't remember owning a pair of red slippers) or to piss in his wardrobe he was going to rip out the other skeleton's spine!

The camera changed angles and Edge saw what Doomfanger was doing doubled in two. The sound he made would have embarrassed him had there been anyone in the hallway with him.

Thanks to the angel he was alone, too bad he wasn't as lucky when the elevator doors opened and a group of monsters came out finding the skeleton passed out on the floor. No one noticed the cell phone still playing the video or heard Stretch's voice encouraging Doomfanger to give birth to his babies, more concerned with helping the "Terrible Edge" who had fainted in shock upon discovering that he would become a grandpa.

***

I'm pretty sure I once again messed up the correct use of pronouns in this fic. I apologize for that (I'll blame it on the translator once again... XP)

Lab is the nickname I'm giving to US!Undyne here (short for Laboratory). Tori refers to UT!Toriel. Vengeance is UF!Undyne. Revenge is SF!Undyne Axe is HT!Sans Crops is HT!Papyrus Science here refers to UT!Alphys and not Sci Sans. Goss is UT!Bratty's nickname (short for gossip). She is one of the embassy's secretaries.

I hope I haven't forgotten anyone.

Thanks for reading!

#undertale #underfell #underswap #uf!sans #uf!papyrus #us!papyrus #doomfanger #fontcest #honeymustard #fanfic #my fanfic #animal birth #but nothing graphic #Doom explosion!#Roll the bones

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