#role playing games are so fun until they aren’t

[eye-of-yelough]

i feel physically sick that was so awful i’m sorry astarion

[starsofang]

CALL OF THE SEA / PART SEVENTEEN

pirate poly!141 x f!reader tw: NSFW, MDNI, violence, degrading, mentions of death/blood, dove is called some nasty words, please heed warnings for this chapter masterlist a/n: girlbossed a little too hard and finished the chapter a day early. posting this after my 14 hour shift with nothing but hope and dreams. this chapter is a long one, i think the longest one so far, so have fun :p

When a group of unhinged pirates invade your small village, you're whisked away from your peaceful home and thrown on to a voyage out at sea. Forced to obtain a new role as their medic, you have no choice but to accept your fate as you join their forces and aid them in their treacherous travels.

Up close, Graves was even more sinister than imagined. It was as if you were living in your own nightmare come to life, with beady eyes crinkling back at you as a curled smile stretched over his face. Adorned in all black from head to toe, with the only spouts of color being the mess of dark blonde atop his head, nearly covered by the old, leather pirate hat.

His skin was deathly pale, a feat you knew to be from his reaping sins. To take a life in return for a piece of his—a soul bind.

If he weren’t such a sick man, you’d dare say he’d been handsome, if it weren’t for the look of rotting to the core. His personality did no justice, something cocky and mighty. He knew exactly how to play his game, and he played it well.

In your turmoil, you dared to wonder if all of this was indeed another nightmare. Perhaps you were still asleep, stuck in an endless loop until Soap or Gaz awoke you as they always did; but with a sharp pinch on your thigh beneath the thin covers of Price’s bedspread, the world remained at ease.

This one wouldn’t be easy to get out of.

“You look like you’ve seen a ghost,” Graves mused, smile so wide you worried the corners would crack and bleed. You wished you could see him writhe like a helpless roach beneath your shoe. “Why the long face?”

“How—” You swallowed, fisting the sheets. “How are you here?”

Graves stood straight, glancing around the room. He pretended to ponder, holding his arms up to shrug. “I let myself in.”

Your eyes followed his every move as he slowly stepped throughout Price’s quarters, taking it in. You sat as still as a statue, completely frozen in place. The sound of his heavy boots along the wood floors rang alarm bells.

The air in the room fell icy cold, rising goosebumps on your skin. There was that frigid chill that felt as if you’d just stepped into a slaughterhouse, a hint of decay tickling your nostrils.

This was the feel of death you’d always felt, lingering behind you, watching. He’d always been there, even if only in your mind.

“Where is the Captain?” you asked, attempting to make your voice firm. Show no weakness—it was the very thing you’d been taught since your first day on the ship. You hoped Price would be proud that you remembered.

Graves’ eyebrows raised and while his smile remained, it only seemed to glimmer with excitement when the question was asked, as if you asked a dog if he wanted a bone.

“He truly has you on a leash,” he snickered, finding something amusing in all of it. “You’re like their little bitch, aren’t you?”

Your blood ran hot at the demeaning nature his words brought, but you knew better. They were for show, something to make him appear taller. If you fell for it, you’d only be digging a deeper grave for yourself.

“No,” you muttered, eyes narrowing. “I am a pirate, just as them.”

Graves barked out a laugh, one that made your ears bleed. It was meant to deplete your confidence, poisoned with arrogance.

“Is that right?” he asked with a shit-eating grin. “A pirate, are you?”

Graves stalked towards you, agonizingly slow, stopping when his knees bumped the side of the cot. He leaned down so his face was level with yours, empty eyes peering deep within your soul. His breath reeked of death and despair, nearly knocking you unconscious.

“I’d like to test that.”

His icy hand wrapped around your bicep, hauling you out of the bed. With a yelp, you stumbled to your feet, bare of their shoes. The world beneath your soles felt foreign now, ever since Soap had given you your gift and you’d never take them off unless you were falling asleep.

The grip was tight, causing your heartbeat to thump through your muscles angrily. Your skin under his hand paled from the sheer force.

Graves tugged you along as you fought to resist him, squirming and attempting to plant your feet to the floor. Without the help of your shoes compared to his unruly strength, your fight was deemed useless. He continued dragging you, so much so you could feel little splinters begin to dig into your soles and invoke dull pangs of pain.

Fear filled your body from head to toe, your heart pounding against your rib cage. A lump filled your throat, coated with anxiety. Your mind filled with millions of thoughts, smothering any confidence you previously had and replacing it with the idea of death.

Was this where all would end? Your crew was one of the most feared among the seas, a healthy bounty placed over their heads. But there would always be one person above, and that person was Graves.

Every kick, bump, resist was fruitless as Graves hauled you to the door. What lay beyond it terrified you, images of your men dead flashing before your eyes.

Coated in their own bloodbaths, bodies laid limp amongst the floors of their own homes, sprawled out as if they meant nothing. Oh, you couldn’t bear it. You’d have to go, too—you’d have nothing left.

When Graves opened the door, you weren’t sure if the sight was any better.

It was dark, the moon only a sliver in the sky, granting no room for light. A single lantern was all that was left to cast orange shadows, its fire flickering in a dance for a way out.

Your crew was lined shoulder to shoulder, on their knees in a submissive front, hands bound with thick rope behind their backs. Graves’ men, his Shadows, held the barrel of their guns to each of their heads.

Though the sight was an improvement from what you initially prepared yourself for, it was far from good. It was bordering those images, a glimpse into what could be a massacre.

The moment you were out of Price’s quarters, Graves let go of you, shoving you. You lost your balance, tumbling to your side, your head slamming into the deck. Pain blossomed under your skull and you hissed in pain.

“Dove?” you heard one of them call out. Your head spun, making it hard to figure out who it was.

A heavy blow landed on your side where you lay, and you wheezed, Graves’ boot unexpected. It kept you in place, applying pressure to guarantee you wouldn’t try to flee and fight back.

“Get the fuck off of her,” Price growled. You could recognize it, filled with a burning venom that dared to kill anyone that was in its crossfire. “This has nothin’ to do with her.”

“It’s all to do with her,” Graves spat, digging the toe of his boot into your rib cage. His previous cockiness had melted away, revealing his boiling rage. “Isn’t that right, dove?”

Graves lifted his boot, granting you a brief moment of relief before it slammed back down. It knocked the air right out of your lungs, leaving you croaking out a plea to stop.

You coiled in on yourself, curling into a ball in attempts to lessen the damage. It did nothing to stop his boot from weighing on your side. The pain felt like nothing you’d experienced before, and you were sure you felt a bone crunch.

“Dove,” Gaz called out, frantic. He tried leaning forward to get a glimpse of your face, to search for your eyes, but the barrel of the gun only pressed deeper into the back of his skull in warning. “Dove, it’s okay. Just listen to my voice, alright? I’m right here.”

Your eyes were widened with fear, chest heaving to catch the breaths that were stolen from you. You couldn’t move, frozen in place, even as Gaz called out for you with the threat of a bullet through his head.

“I don’t know what you’re plannin’, Graves,” Price snarled, “but this is between us.”

Graves laughed diabolically, throwing his head back. It only made everything much more tense.

“Isn’t she apart of you now?” Graves humored, cocking his head. His fingers drummed along the gun in its holster on his hip. “If I’m not mistaken, she’s a pirate. I believe those were your words, Price.”

The realization that Graves knew had you going cold. The closer he got, the stronger the connection became.

“What the hell is it ye want?” Soap asked through gritted teeth. His eyes were darting back and forth between your crumpled form and Graves. “S’always somethin’ with ye, aye?”

Graves eyed Soap, a glint in his gaze. There was something unfamiliar in it, as if he held a personal grudge towards the man in question.

“There is something I want,” Graves agreed, letting out a dramatic sigh. He tapped at the gun once again, staring up at the sky in thought. “I think dove here knows exactly what that is.”

Graves dug his boot once again, peering down at you as if you were scum. You couldn’t stop the small whimper from the agony drumming in your side.

“Go on, dove,” Graves taunted, grinning. “Tell them.”

“I don’t know,” you panted. You were unfocused, eyes staring at the old floor from where your head rested.

You tried recalling what it is he could want, anything at all, but nothing was becoming clear. You scavenged through the deepest parts of your brain for even a simple clue, but the blows had made you dazed.

“I swear, I’ll fuckin’ kill you—”

“You do know,” Graves repeated, cutting off the Captain. His tone grew annoyed. “Think real hard, dove.”

“I don’t know,” you cried, shoulders beginning to shake. All the built up confidence to fight back had vanished into thin air. Now, you felt like a scared little girl, begging for mercy.

Graves’ boot lifted, then returned back down. A string of curses were thrown his way from your crew, who were thrashing in the binds, unable to aid you under the lineup of guns to their heads.

You felt wetness cascade down your cheeks, dampening your skin and falling down to the side of your head from the angle you laid. It was then you realized you were crying, embarrassingly so.

Only mere hours ago you were deemed a pirate, and yet at the start of war, you fell apart like a damsel.

“The telescope,” Ghost said, voice low. It was the first he’d spoken, only sitting there silently as you were beaten down. His head hung low, as if ashamed, though the darkness in his eyes was enough to cast doom across entire continents. “He’s talkin’ about the telescope.”

You blinked away the tears, eyes burning. Realization dawned on you the moment Ghost spoke. Through your huddled position, you tried to tilt your chin down to meet his eye. As if thinking the same thing, he lifted his head, connecting your gazes. You could see that familiar apology pooling out of him, expressing everything he needed to say.

Washed away to land and shore,

shall be the looking glass for ocean eyes.

The telescope you found for Gaz was an innocent gesture. The sight of it called out to you, as if meant to be owned by you. If you would’ve known it was Graves it was calling, you would’ve thrown it into the deep sea so it could never be found again.

“So he speaks,” Graves mused sarcastically.

Ghost broke contact first, eyes boring into Graves. He looked murderous, plotting his own bloodbath with just a simple look. The dim light of the single lantern did nothing to lessen the ominous glow, only highlighting it.

“Don’t fuckin’ talk to him,” Soap hissed, scowling. The look of pure disgust was such a contrast to his normal, boyish grins.

Graves paid no mind to him, stuck in a contest with Ghost. The two of them had a dark force swirling between them, one that even outside made the air heavy and suffocating.

“A point for your bravery, Ghost,” Graves sighed dramatically, breaking his stare. He looked between each and every man, sparing you no glance while his boot remained in place. “My telescope. Give it to me, and I’ll let her go.”

You instantly shifted your eyes to look at Gaz, who seemed to be struggling with a decision. You knew why he was having a hard time—you gifted the telescope to him, unknowing of who it truly belonged to. It was something he treasured, something he didn’t want to let go of.

“I have it,” Gaz said lowly, head bowing. “It’s in my quarters. I’ll take you to it.”

Graves sucked his teeth, feigning pity. He shook his head, hand fully resting on the gun at his hip. “Not going to work on me, Gaz. I’m quite capable of getting it myself. You sit tight, aye?”

Gaz stiffened, expression growing grim. Nevertheless, he said nothing, deciding silence was the best contender for a fight bound to end in loss.

Graves gestured for the man behind Price to fetch the telescope from Gaz and Soap’s shared quarters. Price didn’t tear his eyes away from Graves once, even as the Devil of the Seas took out his own gun and pointed it right at Price’s forehead.

He pressed the barrel of the gun into Price’s forehead, indenting the skin. It was a snug fit, a perfect shot for Graves if he wished to end things the easy way.

Graves didn’t like it easy. He liked it fun.

“Scared we’ve caught on to your trail, aye?” Price bluffed, voice gravelly and malicious. “That’s why you came out here like a fuckin’ mutt, hidin’ in the storm until you found the right time to ambush us?”

“You have your dove to blame,” Graves replied nonchalantly, rubbing his boot back and forth along your side. The pressure had you sucking air through your teeth, eyes clenching shut. “She might be your new toy, but she’s just as much a mutt as I am.”

“You shut your fuckin’ mouth,” Price snarled, body shaking with feverish rage. If he could pounce on Graves, you knew he would.

“Looks like you finally grew some balls, Captain,” Graves snickered, pulling back the hammer of the gun. It resounded a loud click, which translated to a warning bell in Price’s favor. “Such anger. That anger has never worked for you, Price. It didn’t work for Ghost—it won’t work for her.”

Price let out an animalistic growl, his lips pulling back in a sneer. You’d seen the Captain angry, and you’d seen him under the guise of a scary, ominous pirate who would kill any innocent bystander that stood in his way.

This was entirely different. This was personal. A build up. This was a storm that had been coming for ages, and you were only toeing the edges.

The Shadow returned, holding the telescope you’d gifted Gaz. It shimmered in the lantern’s glow, glinting its gold details and showing it off. It felt like a goodbye.

“I’d be real careful from now on, Graves,” Price warned. It was the first you ever heard him speak so menacingly, like the demon inside of him was erupting with a stream of hot lava filled with nothing but spewing hatred. “When I find you, I’ll fuckin’ kill you myself. String you up on my sails until you’re dry, toss you into the ocean to the sharks. I’ll take pleasure in watchin’ you burn until there’s nothin’ left but ash and dust.”

Graves took the telescope from his Shadow’s hand, inspecting it. The words Price spoke clearly struck a nerve, for the arrogant grin had vanished, replaced with a gloomy, threatened expression.

“Hm,” Graves huffed, letting his gun fall and placing it back in its holster. He signaled for his men to follow suit, and you watched as all weapons dropped. “I await the day that happens, Captain. Until then, keep your mutt on a leash, aye?”

Graves made no effort to untie the crew, leaving them bound as he gathered his men to walk the plank connecting the two ship. A long, woden plank that creaked under the weight, one od wish you could kick from its balance and send them flying into the dark sea.

The moment was brutally silent as they left. Nobody moved a muscle until Graves was on his ship, the plank pulled from its placement, and the skull flag waved goodbye as they set sail into the pit of the night.

Time stood still, but the second Graves and his crew were hidden in the waves, all hell broke loose. Price and Gaz worked together to unbind each other with their backs to one another, frantic to be released. Ghost sat silently, eyes staring into the floorboards as if they’d speak to him.

“Say somethin’, dove,” Soap begged, scooting on his knees to be by your side.

As if the dam broke, you began to cry once more, heartbreaking sobs coming right from your core. You curled up tighter into your ball, your hand resting on your side as if it would magically ease the pain.

“It hurts,” you replied, voice cracking.

You’d stayed strong up until that point. Now, you couldn’t hold up your front.

You were scared. You felt more helpless than ever. You couldn’t remain strong for the sake of pretend anymore. Everything hurt, and Graves’ presence shook you to your very core.

“I know,” he cooed. He made a frustrated noise when he struggled against the binds. “I know, dove. We’re right here, alright?”

It felt strange, being on the other side of the spectrum. You were used to being the one to aid people in their injuries, but now, it was you being comforted. You couldn’t grasp what your life had become.

Price was released from his binds, quickly helping Gaz slip out of his. While Gaz made quick work to move to work on Ghost, Price was by your side in an instant.

One hand rested on your hip, turning your body towards him while the other found your face, resting his palm on it. His eyes were filled with worry when you faced him and he urgently wiped at your tears with his thumb.

“Dove,” he breathed in relief, his heart aching at the sight of you so broken. This was his fault. “You’re okay, I have you.”

You whimpered when he shifted so he could slide his arms beneath you, one under your shoulders and the other in the bend of your knees. The movement flared pain all over again, and Price murmured apologies, unsure of what to do.

He hurried to his quarters, his men following closely behind like scared dogs with their tails between their legs. Gaz held open the door, and you only caught a glimpse of his guilt-stricken expression before you were ushered in.

Price carefully slid you on to his cot, wincing every time you whimpered or cried. The pain felt excruciating, your breathing quick and labored.

“She needs a medic,” Soap stressed.

“She is a medic,” Gaz reminded, resting his hands on the edge of the cot so he could lean over and inspect your face. “We have no help besides her.”

“Well, she can’t treat herself, ye fuckin’ oaf,” Soap snipped, shooing him away from your space. “Cap, she needs to get checked. She can’t even breathe properly!”

Your head began to pound from the sheer loudness that filled the room. You squeezed your eyes shut, trying to will away the ache while simultaneously trying to correct your breathing.

You knew well enough that there was something shattered or broken. A rib, though small in theory, but dreadfully painful without the correct medicines. Not to mention the amount of force Graves had used—it was pure hell.

Price was silent, as was Ghost, the two of them sharing a conversation with just a look. There was an understanding shared, and Price gently shoved Gaz and Soap aside, replacing them.

He mimicked Gaz’s previous stance, leaning on the bed. His hand came to brush a stray tear away, frowning embedded in his mouth.

“Tell me what to do, dove,” he said softly. “I’ll do whatever it is.”

You sniffled, hand shaking where they rested on your side. You shook your head, nearly deranged from the shock and horror of it all, unable to snap out of it.

“I—I can’t fix it on my own, Captain,” you quivered, lips trembling. “It hurts.”

Price nearly broke, filled with guilt. He glanced behind him at Ghost, who quickly looked away, hands balling into fists.

“I know,” he assured calmly, brushing his finger along your cheek where he wiped the tear away. “We’ll fix it, aye? You just have to sit tight until we can. Can you do that for us, dove?”

Though you knew the wait would be cruel—a slow healing process until you could receive proper care—you found yourself nodding shamelessly, instantly trusting Price and his promises.

Price nodded along with you, giving your cheek a comforting pinch. “Attagirl,” he praised, calming your nerves.

“I’ll fuckin’ gut him,” Soap muttered, jaw pulled tight. “He’s fuckin’ dead.”

Gaz reached up to grip Soap’s nape, tugging at his hair. Soap threw him a glare, one Gaz promptly ignored, turning his attention to you.

“Listen to Cap, birdie,” Gaz encouraged warmly. “We’ll get you all fixed up. You won’t even know you’re hurtin’.”

Price had a look of hesitation when you caught his eye. You furrowed your eyebrows, frowning in confusion before he spoke again, causing you to grow uncomfortable.

“We need to check it first, dove,” he said apologetically. “If you don’t feel well with all of us bein’ here, you can pick who you prefer. No hard feelin’s, hm?”

The idea that one, if not all, had to see you undressed in order to inspect the damage was one that made you a bit dazed. You’d never been seen beneath your raggedy clothes in the village, and the same applied for your time on the ship. It felt sacred, like your vulnerability was on the line, but you had to remind yourself that it was purely medical—you’d done it plenty of times when in practice at your old home.

“It—it is fine, just… just turn away, yes?” you pleaded, unable to meet any of them in the eye.

You heard a round of shuffling, only seeing Gaz elbow Soap in the corner of your vision. Once you were sure they feasted their eyes upon the old wall, you began to carefully lift your hips, biting your lip to muffle the pained noise that threatened to leave.

The hem of your dress was swiftly pulled up past your thighs, all the way until your torso was exposed. You stopped it beneath your breasts, quick to tug the blanket over your nakedness that remained uninjured and in no need to be checked.

The anxiety that pooled in your stomach left you queasy, but you toughed through it, knowing how important it was. If you had more than a mere fracture, it could become worse over time.

“Okay,” you said quietly, cringing when they turned to take you in. The men did their best to make you feel as at ease as possible, gearing their focus towards the nasty swelling on your side.

You dared to take a peek yourself, fearing for why they were so quiet. What you saw was ugly—swollen and puffy, beaten to the point it was already turning purple and blue. It was tender to the touch, even more so without clothing as a barrier.

The worst was the gnarly, black veins that spouted out like roots, dipping deep into the new bruising. It was inhuman, something completely out of the ordinary. You knew it was Graves’ dirty work, and it reminded you of when Ghost had cut his finger in the kitchen and his blood turned black, vanishing into thin air.

When you shifted your eyes from your injury, you searched for Ghost’s, who was hard-stuck on the veins. His body was tense, a darkness swirling in his irises.

“Ghost?” Soap tried, nudging the brute lightly. “Any idea what that is?”

Ghost glanced over to Soap before returning to your side, taking in the sight. “Could be anythin’,” he muttered, unsure. “I don’t know what all he’s capable of. For all we know, it could already be infected.”

“Infected?” you asked, a worried chill racking through you.

Price reached out a careful hand to spread his fingertips along the veins. You choked on a gasp at the immediate discomfort, face scrunching up into a wince.

“We’re goin’ to a doctor,” Price nearly growled, taking his hand away. “I don’t care where. The moment we spot land, we’re goin’.”

“We still have bounties on our head, Cap,” Gaz reminded with a frown. “We can’t just go anywhere. It’s not the same as shoppin’. If we end up in the wrong place, we might get ourselves in deeper shit.”

“That is a risk I’m willin’ to take,” Price argued, firm in his stance. “If we start nitpickin’ where to go, it might be too late. You’re either in or out.”

The room fell silent as the men stared at their Captain. The answer to them was obvious, though you knew why they hesitated; if they were imprisoned, it would do you no good.

Emotions were high and the clock was ticking. It placed everyone on edge.

“I agree with Price.”

All heads turned to Ghost, who stood with his arms crossed, eyes boring into yours.

“It’s my fault she’s marked. So long as she gets fixed up, I could care less about bein’ thrown into a cell. I’m with Price,” he finished.

“Ghost—” you tried.

“I am quite firm in what I’ve decided,” he interrupted harshly before realizing his mistake, calming himself down. He looked away from you, crossing his arms a bit tighter. “I’m in no mood for arguments.”

You went quiet, watching Ghost turn towards the door and plot his escape. You knew out of everyone, he was affected the most, tormented with sickening guilt for all that’s transpired. You could only imagine how he felt, now that times had grown darker.

“Let him go,” Soap murmured softly, gaining your attention. “He’ll be alright. Let’s just worry ‘bout ye, aye?”

You were torn, but you nodded nonetheless, silently agreeing.

“You’ll stay with me for now,” Price explained. “No use in movin’ you anymore than I have. I’ll get you situated for now, and then you can rest.”

Gaz, Soap, and Price muttered amongst themselves, discussing a brief plan of what to do. The two set off to find more pillows to extend your comfort while Price remained by your side, plopping himself in his chair with a heavy sigh. His elbows rested on its arms, his fingers coming up to rub at his temple.

He looked exhausted, the bags under his eyes becoming more prominent the longer you looked.

“I am sorry, Captain,” you said quietly, eyes glueing to the ceiling.

“What have you got to be sorry for?” he asked, frowning. “Got nothin’ to apologize for, dove. Our worry stems from care.”

“Yes, but,” you paused, gathering the words, “I have caused much trouble since my arrival. Things only seem to be harder for you.”

“Life was hard before you, dove,” he assured, letting his hand fall from his face. “That’s the way it goes. It is to no fault but the world.”

You took in his words, letting them sink in. You hadn’t known a true life of trouble before, the only hardships being your utter loneliness and daily taunts from the local villagers. This was something beyond your knowledge, and you were beginning to understand that there was more to life than simply displeasuring people. There was more than what meets the eye, but there was also light at the end of every tunnel.

“You do not see me as a mere burden?” you asked, and he huffed.

“What have I told you before?” Price pressed in return, tilting his head. “You are one of us. A true pirate, if that is what you’d like.”

“I am far from a pirate,” you scoffed to yourself, ashamed. “I could not even defend myself or any of you.”

“Dove,” Price called out softly. He scooted his chair closer to your bedside, forcing you to turn your head and look at him. “A loss is not always a failure. Some wars are too big to handle on your own. There’s nothin’ wrong with that. Why must you speak so lowly of yourself?”

You stared at him unblinking, studying the furrow of his eyebrows and the curl of his lips, hidden beneath his beard. The worry lines on his forehead showed years of hardship, and you wondered how he managed to live through it if you could barely survive your own smaller ones.

“I have known nothing else,” you confessed bitterly, though not towards him. You were angry, not only with yourself, but at life for dealing its deck of cards in such an unfair way.

“I see,” he hummed, leaning back in his chair. He tapped his fingers along the armrests, getting lost in thought. “It was the same for me as well.”

Your eyebrows shot up in surprise. “Really?”

“Mhm,” he sighed, picking at the splintering wood of the armrests. “My father was a captain before me. Had the tongue of a devil. Always angry, always cold—treated me like scum, even as a child.”

“I am sorry,” you murmured quietly. Price bristled, frowning.

“That is not the point, dove,” he replied. He leaned forward to rest his elbows on the side of the bed, mere inches away from where you laid. You waited patiently for him to continue, keeping your gazes connected to show you were listening. “Some may treat you like a mutt on the street and deem your worth how they please. The only thing that matters is how you take it and how you come out of it.”

It dawned on you what he was implying. It was his way of comforting you, shielding you from your own burdening insecurities that never seemed to escape your mind.

“I could’ve remained angry and bitter, but now I captain my own ship and crew. The same applies for you—you may have experienced cruelty all your life, but you must take the reins on your own worth and decide what it is, dove.”

A blinding warmth shrouded you, like a blanket after being trapped in the icy cold, and you welcomed it with a smile. You’d never known Price to be so well with words, not int he way he was expressing now.

He knew what you needed to hear after being trapped in your own world of darkness, and he provided the light you needed to find your way out—all of them did. A glimmer of hope in a world full of loss.

“I am very thankful you kidnapped me,” you blurted, unable to contain your inner thoughts.

Price laughed, boisterous and loud, a smile washing over his face. It was a lovely sight, one that made your heart pound. Even through your pain, you found solitude in the aftermath, reaching a level of comfort you’d always wished to feel.

“I am happy to have you here despite it,” Price teased warmly. “I can say the same for the rest.”

You laughed, almost immediately regretting it at the shooting pain coursing in your side. He shot you a sympathetic smile, slowly standing from his chair.

“I will let you rest,” he said, giving you a gentle pat to your thigh over the blanket. Your heart jumped at the action, and you repressed it.

“You are not staying?” you asked, deflating.

“Soap and Gaz will be here with some more pillows soon. I must gather a plan so we can get you to a medic as soon as possible.”

It made sense, and you knew it was important. There was no telling what was flowing through the black veins, but your heart longed for more of his presence.

“Just for a moment longer?” you dared to request, voice small.

Price peered down at you from where he stood over you, a hint of surprise flashing on his expression before it softened. He nodded, reaching over to give your hand a gentle squeeze. You held on as long as you could.

“Just a moment then,” he repeated. “I will do it for you.”

You squeezed his hand in return, feeling as if you were on cloud nine. Your feelings were uncertain, but the more you spent with them, the clearer your vision became. It was an inner battle, forcing yourself to push them back in order to protect yourself. Now, though, you decided to allow yourself the comfort, just for a little while.

“Thank you,” you told him, unaware your voice had become a mere whisper. The air between you felt heavy, as if something unspoken was there.

Price glanced down at your hands that remained interlinked before shifting his gaze back at you. The gears in his mind were turning, and just as you were about to ask if it was alright, he beat you.

“I am not an emotional man,” he murmured quietly, seeming just as unsure as you were. “I make very stupid decisions and take paths I shouldn’t take. One of them is tellin’ me to kiss you, and I’m not sure if that’s alright.”

You froze in place, eyes growing wide. You were unable to look away, lost in your own little moment. Everything in you was yelling yes, yes, yes! and it was hard to ignore. You had always been weak in your feelings.

“Gaz tried to when I gifted him the telescope,” you said, unsure of why you did. “I hope that is okay.”

Price broke out into a smile, huffing out a breathy laugh. “So long as he did not beat me to it.”

You released a relieved breath, a shaky smile spreading on your lips. Price did not seem angry, and for that, you grew more enticed for a kiss. While your feelings for the others were all different in their special ways, having Price be the first was not something you could deny. It excited you more than it should.

Before you knew it, Price leaned down, capturing your lips in his own. There was no spark like you’d read in books you’d read at merchant stands when you couldn’t afford them, nor were there fireworks.

Instead, it was a calm sea that smothered you in peace, easing every worry that crowded your mind. They washed away, replaced with a warm buzz.

He was gentle, hand still grasping yours, the other coming to rest beneath your jaw. His skin was hot to the touch, rough from the callouses on his palm.

The moment wasn’t long, and when he pulled away, you wished you could reel him in for more.

“Rest,” he encouraged, his smile brighter than a thousand suns. “We’ll get you fixed up and better before you know it, alright?”

You nodded dumbly, your head empty. You were practically vibrating with excitement, the feel of his lips still tingling on yours.

He stroked his thumb over your cheekbone before pulling back, stepping away from the bed. He gave you a soft farewell, reminding you that the boys will be back soon and to try and sleep until then.

Once he was out of the room, the quiet didn’t bother you. It wasn’t maddening, driving you up a wall, suffocating you with loneliness—it was peaceful and kind, welcoming you with open arms as you slipped into unconsciousness, the images flashing behind your eyelids of the four of them in your life only bringing you true comfort after the storm.

[chillian-murphy]

Don't Bully Me, I'll Cum

SUMMARY: You dominate your slutty submissive boyfriend, Neil Lewis

WORD COUNT: 2.2k

WARNINGS/ADDITIONAL INFO: Smut 🔞, face slapping, verbal humiliation, body writing, references to orgasm denial, facefucking (female-on-male), cunnilingus, rimming, anal fingering, cum eating, praise kink (if you squint), hand job

Beta read by @sasybanana

It was always a treat when you got to see Neil like this: naked and kneeling, with his neck adorned by a heavy leather collar that only seemed to emphasize his thin frame as it dangled loosely. His cock was at half-mast, already hardening at the mere thought of what was coming. 

“Does my little slut want attention?” you cooed as you sauntered forward, wearing nothing but a matching lace bra and panty set. His head shot up and his body tensed, his bright blue eyes desperately meeting your gaze.

“Yes, Mistress.” There was a breathy, needy quality to his voice that sent a tingle down your spine.

“Does my needy little slut deserve attention?”

He didn’t even form words this time, just whined and nodded. That wouldn’t do.

Smack

Neil’s cheek flushed and he reeled from the impact.

“Use your words, baby.”

“Yes, I deserve your attention.”

Smack

You saw the same flush to the other side of his face, the same scramble to regain balance.

“Why?”

“Because I’ve been good all week. I haven’t come without your permission. I’ve been so, so good for you. I’m a good boy and I need my Mistress to touch me.”

He was so pleading and so sincere, and it was true, he had been obedient for you all week, but you couldn’t indulge him just yet.

Smack

“And what do you deserve?” 

His eyes were watering now.

“I deserve to have my c-c-cock ignored and to w-worship your p-pussy.” He was tumbling over his words now, overly eager for any sort of response.

Smack

“Because you’re a desperate slut who’ll cherish any sort of attention you’re given, aren’t you?” At this point, you were just gloating, basking in the power you had over him.

“Yes, Mistress. So desperate.”

You knelt down to level yourself with him and pulled a tube of lipstick out from your bra. You scrawled the word SLUT across his chest in bright red letters, feeling his heart race under your fingers as you steadied him to write. The dense pigments would stain his skin long after he showered and the lipstick was gone, at least for the next day or so. You secretly hoped that he and his coworkers would play a “shirts vs skins” pickup game in the alley while the writing was still visible, so everyone would know how willing he was to debase himself for you.

Neil let out a sharp, hissing whimper as you yanked on one of his tiny nipples. You couldn’t help but make a mental note of how pretty he is when he suffers. You had never imagined that you’d be the one taking such a dominant role in the bedroom, but what had begun as begrudgingly indulging Neil in one of his fantasies had quickly become a highlight of your sex life. You were made to be worshiped, and he was made to kneel.

You pressed a quick, chaste kiss to his cheek as you stood. He gazed up at you as sweet and willing and as pathetically as ever, his pouty little mouth hanging open. As badly as you wanted to grab him by the hair and ride his face until your pussy exhausted itself, you were having too much fun tormenting him and didn’t want the scene to be over. However, it did give you an idea.

“Open up.” you stroked your hand down his face towards his mouth, and toyed with his plush bottom lip with your thumb. Once his mouth was sufficiently open, you pushed your thumb inside, pressing down on his warm, wet tongue. He groaned invitingly at the sensation, and massaged the pad of your thumb as best he could. Satisfied, you withdrew your thumb and replaced it with three of your fingers, gently thrusting them further and making him gag.

“Okay if I facefuck you?” You dropped the Big Bad Dom Voice for a while to genuinely check in. Facefucking wasn’t something you’d done with Neil before, at least not with him as the recipient, so you had no idea if it was off-limits or not. However, the way Neil very enthusiastically moaned, sucked your fingers, and attempted to nod let you know that it was very much on the menu tonight.

You pulled your fingers from his mouth and excitedly rushed to your toy cabinet in search of your dildo and harness. You found it quickly and took your time putting it all on, making sure everything fit as snuggly as it could for the most stability. It wasn’t the sexiest process, but it was necessary, as proven by past incidents where you put things on more haphazardly only for your fake cock to flop around in an unwieldy manner.

Neil looked absolutely giddy when you returned to him, grinning like an idiot and squirming in the spot where he was kneeling. His face was so happy and adorable you’d want it on a Christmas card, if it wasn’t for the whole “kneeling naked with a raging erection” aspect. Or who knows, certain friends of yours might actually put your card on the fridge this year if you chose this over gaudy matching sweaters.

“Open up, baby.” You pressed the tip of your fake cock to his lips and gave his cheek a light slap, as if he somehow didn’t get the message. His mouth fell open and he began bobbing his head over your length cautiously, looking up at you through his lush eyelashes. Fuck, as much as you knew it was just a piece of plastic and not a part of your body, you <i>swore</i> you could feel him sucking your dick. You snaked a hand into his hair and gripped as hard as you could, pulling him further towards the base as you fucked his wet, willing mouth.

“You’re such a fucking whore. All you want to do is sit there and be used, you don’t care how. Just a useless man who doesn’t even care if his cock gets touched so long as someone fucks and uses any part of him.” The harsher your words got, the more his eyes rolled back in pleasure. A deep, guttural groan formed in the back of his throat, struggling to get out around the toy being thrust in and out of him.

Neil began to gag as you pushed him further down, which only encouraged you to thrust into him harder. His throat was so wet and warm when you had your fingers in his mouth, you can’t imagine how good it would feel if you had an actual cock to fuck his face with. Still, he looked absolutely beautiful with his eyes full of tears and his lips stretched around the sizable toy that you had picked out together.

“It's a shame you don't suck real cock, you're such a good little cocksucker. Maybe we should put a glory hole in the adult section of Gumshoe. Start making the store some real money off of your slutty little mouth." 

After a few more thrusts, you yanked Neil off of your cock. He looked absolutely debauched, his face flushed a bright red with tears streaming down his cheeks and a thick strand of saliva hanging down his chin. He panted and sputtered, desperate for air after having his throat abused, trying to recover as quickly as possible so he could speak.

“Need your pussy. Now." Unsurprisingly, his voice was hoarse.

“Good boys don't make demands." You felt drunk with power.

“Please, Mistress, I need your pussy. I need to make you feel good." 

He was so cute, so pathetic, so desperate. You hooked a finger underneath his collar and pulled him towards the bed. Thankfully, the strap-on harness was easier to take off than it was to put on, you simply loosened the waist strap and stepped out of it along with your panties. The lace bralette was next to go, and once you were nude, you casually flopped onto the bed and spread your legs. Neil obediently followed, laying next to you and waiting for directions. As badly as he wanted to bury his cock inside you, he wanted to please you even more. 

“You know what to do, my good boy." Your voice now soft, you tenderly stroked his face and guided him between your legs. Dutifully, he dipped his head down and began licking, sucking, and kissing your cunt, just the way he knew you liked.

Neil had eating you out down to a science: gently kiss and nuzzle his way up your inner thighs, start with broad, slow licks all over, and then alternate between sucking and circling your clit with his tongue. Occasionally he couldn't help but dip his tongue deeper inside of you, he knew it didn't do much to get you off but he wanted to taste as much of you as possible. It was absolute heaven for him, it made him feel so wanted, so useful, so worthy of your attention. You were so wet for him, it was all the affirmation he needed to know that he was the good boy he needed to be for you.

It didn't take long for your orgasm to start building. As you hit your first climax, you hooked one of your legs over Neil's shoulder and reached down to pull on his hair again, pulling him as close to you as possible. Although you couldn't see him, you could feel Neil's lips curl into a smile. The change in position gave him the perfect angle for teasing your rim, something he rarely got to do. 

He pressed the pad of one of his fingers against the tight ring of muscle, not enough to stretch you open, but enough to let you know where he wanted to touch you without startling you. You moaned and lifted your hips, not only giving him permission but also easier access. His finger was soon replaced by his tongue, swirling and getting you as wet as possible.

Turning his attention back to your pussy, Neil slipped two of his fingers into you while massaging your clit with his tongue. It was such a delightfully wet and sloppy mess, Neil couldn't help but feel proud of himself. Once his fingers were sufficiently coated in your slick, he withdrew them from your cunt and once again pressed them to your rim, this time with enough pressure and lubrication to enter your tightest hole.

Having your ass penetrated was always a bit awkward but, while this was no exception, you were able to quickly relax and let him stretch you. It wasn’t painful, but the sensation did feel foreign and weird as you adjusted to the new fullness. Once you had time to adjust, Neil began slowly working his fingers in and out of you, working in tandem with his mouth, which was sucking and practically drinking your pussy, treating it like a source of fine nectar.

Once again, the familiar tightness started building in your core and your inner muscles clenched. You let yourself moan, welcoming your orgasm and the aftershocks that followed. As you returned to Earth from your dizzying sexual high, you pushed Neil off of you, albeit much gentler than how you had handled him earlier.

“You’re so goddamn good for me. How does my good boy want to come?” You panted out, thoroughly exhausted but well-fucked.

“I want you to jerk me off. If you don’t mind.” Neil averted his gaze as much as he could. Asking directly for what he wanted always made him a bit shy, much more than the begging or groveling he was used to during a scene. His face was bright red, although you had no way of knowing if it was from bashfulness or from eating you out like his life depended on it.

“Of course, you’re such a good boy. Come lay next to me and let me take care of you.” 

You scooted to the side of the bed and patted the empty space next to you, inviting him to join you as an equal for the first time today. As soon as he flopped next to you, you turned your attention to his poor, neglected cock.

He was leaking a generous amount of precum, enough that you were able to collect it on your fingers and use it as lube. You wrapped your hand around him and began pumping gently, knowing that a quicker pace would overstimulate him. It didn’t take long for him to shoot thick ropes of pearly white come onto his stomach. His loads were always huge after a week of not being allowed to touch himself.

“Are you okay? Was that what you wanted?” You swiped some of the come from Neil’s stomach onto your fingers and brought them to his mouth to lick clean.

“Yes. Perfect. Exactly.” He answered quickly before sucking your fingers clean with a soft groan. “You’re perfect. I love it when you’re mean to me. Maybe next time you could step on my cock and tell me how fucking pathetic and worthless it is or put it in a cage or spank me and send pictures to–”

“Hey.” You cut him off and shoved him playfully. “I thought I was the one who got to make the demands around here.”

“See? Just like that. So perfectly goddamn mean to me.”

[swiggity-swexual-i-am-asexual]

DPxDC media story prompt

Okay first off, this sort of thing has been done before, but here’s a different version involving Jazz Fenton.

Popular in DPxDC fanfic is that the GIW have a media blackouts—or whiteouts, there’s kind of a difference, where whiteouts work more like… there is a file, but you can’t edit it or it may be locked out for certain users, or an edited version of events where things are ‘whited out’ like with correction paste, among other definitions.

Point is!

The GIW have a media restriction, and among these is social media, probably with certain words or phrases pinging to location restrict the post. There was probably a phase for a while where the A-Listers tried to get around it, but ultimately failed, and since they could only get information IN rather than information OUT, and possibly still a limited amount of outside information in the first place, social media didn’t take off as much in Amity Park than in other places in the world. There’s still a small local presence, but at this point it’s almost like a city wide chat room than actual social media.

Enter in, Jazz Fenton. She’s chronically behind on trends, so by the time she decides to get on social media, the GIW aren’t being as militant on it. And she has that habit of calling the ghosts by code names instead of their actual names, such as Crate Creep instead of The Box Ghost, or Ghost X instead of Skulker. By pure coincidence of her personal language use and Tucker messing with all of Team Phantom’s phone locaters for easier excuse giving, Jazz manages to dodge all the word censors.

She accidentally creates a whole online story community convinced it’s some kind of altered reality game or role playing game, what have you. Meanwhile, Jazz is letting off steam by ranting online with, of course, made up names of all the people involved. She doesn’t even notice the numbers, and that’s assuming the GIW didn’t just—region lock the ability to see them for whatever reason. The few Amity Parkers on social medias see Jazz, maybe look at a complaint post or two, then move on because this isn’t even an unusual video inside Amity Park’s social media sphere.

Heck, PHANTOM has a social media presence and he’s done several rant videos too! One particularly famous one is him complaining about keeping his boots and gloves white while being chased and one of the GIW agents actually stops and gives him advice before shooting at him again.

Those outside Amity Park, of course, only see Jazz’s videos. And she has no idea that she has an entire online presence and mild amounts of online fame. And again, almost everyone thinks the whole thing is just a fun little game, if oddly detailed.

Until, that is, a certain young man by the name of Bernard comes in. One of the few who are totally convinced this is real, he tries to also convince his boyfriend—Timothy Drake-Wayne. Who, in turn, finds it incredibly suspicious that it’s this hard to get news and posts from one random town in the Midwest.

[devotioncrater]

I am once again going to queer analyze the fuck out of Ted Lasso, specifically the scene with Trent and Ted in the hallway at the end of Season 3, Episode 7.

Trent swoops in as the door is closing behind Ted, calls out, “TED!”, and then he runs towards Ted, who is walking away from him. Ted turns, bewildered, because here is Trent -- cool, calm, awkward Trent -- completely out of his shell like never before. There’s a spark to Trent. He’s excited, he’s rambling, he’s so close to Ted. He’s vulnerable, too, because he is laying everything he’s thinking and feeling out in the open. (“It’s going to work!” “And I’ll tell you why -- The Lasso Way!” “You haven’t switched tactics in a week!”)

Chemistry goes both ways. It’s a feedback loop, in a sense, because Ted is taking in what Trent is giving. He turns fully to face Trent, even turning when Trent leaves; actively engages by asking questions (“Great! What is?” “Why?” “I haven’t?”); and the more this interaction goes on, the more Ted’s face goes from bewildered to fond. Is he humoring Trent by letting him ramble? Yeah, he is, because he finds it endearing.

The way it’s shot plays a massive role, too. We the audience know that Roy and Beard are there all along. However, we temporarily forget their presence because the camera is equally close on both Trent and Ted. And the intensity of Trent’s rambling distracts us. It’s not until their little conversation is over that the angle is zoomed out and we’re reminded they aren’t alone. It’s intentionally done like that as an insight onto how Ted feels. He’s tuned in on what Trent has to say, and everything else falls away to the background.

In a heavy rom-com episode, this is the love interest’s confesional to the main character.

Trent was sparking. So much so I’ve seen people say they expected the two to kiss. And that thought doesn’t just pop up out of nowhere. You don’t arrive to that conclusion baseless. Which means:

1) The simmering three-season-long groundwork put into their relationship is rock solid.

2) The romcom beats -- which have gotten more frequent -- are subconciously hitting the audience and therefore priming us to expect a follow through (re: a kiss)

3) Characters do not get that close unless it’s to kiss, fight, or scheme. Clearly they aren’t fighting or scheming, so what other expectation is there?

Now hold onto your hat, cowboy. This is where it gets fun.

This hallway scene is a direct parallel to Rebecca and Ted in the West Ham hallway. It’s at an away game; Rebecca and Trent are both potential love interests with an air of manic energy; and, again, it takes place in a hallway with the team in the locker room. 

Only this time, with Trent, everything is subverted. 

Ted walks to Rebecca vs Trent runs to Ted.

Rebecca touches Ted vs Trent doesn’t physically engage.

Ted being uncomfortable the entire interaction vs Ted leaning into the interaction.

Beard and Roy not being present vs Beard and Roy being there.

This subversion also applies to where Rebecca and Trent’s respective manic energy stem from. Their energy levels are foils of one another. 

Rebecca’s stems from negative external factors outside of Richmond (re: Rupert) and the fact the team is losing the match/things are not working.

Trent’s stems from positive internal factors within Richmond (re: belief in The Lasso Way) and the fact things are going to work despite the team losing the match.

Let’s get queer up in here and extrapolate those subversions to sexuality:

Ted slowly approaches heterosexuality (Rebecca), alone (without community) and is uncomfortable by the external pressures placed upon him, the way heterosexuality imposes its touch on him. He visibly looks/feels worse after the interaction.

vs

Queerness (Trent) running up behind Ted with a warning shout (hitting Ted when he doesn’t expect it) and while Ted is surrounded by others (with community). And at first Ted is confused by it, but as soon as he hears it out, gives it a chance, he grows fond of what it has to say. It does not impose its touch on him, and the pressure is an excited internal one. Ted visibly looks/feels better after the interaction.

In Trent’s words, it’s going to work.

[thebibliosphere]

What is the gameplay like on Gotham Knights? I have poor coordination so I have trouble with anything more complex than LOZ: Ocarina of Time. Like, on a scale of Pokémon->Dragon Age->LOZ->Dark Souls?

It's a bit clunky like Dragon Age 2, tbh. Except it doesn't have the excuse of coming out in 2011. The mechanics and camera controls are one of the things that let it down a lot, IMO.

I’m constantly getting stuck on walls and the edge of ledges because the controls feel laggy and the game’s not consistent about which surfaces you can climb and which ones you need to grapple. It's fine if you’re fighting in more open spaces but it turns the timed events into an exercise in frustration. Not to mention the number of times it feels like I’ve taken damage through an obstacle from enemy ranged attacks when my own ranged attacks bounce off invisible walls if I’m not standing in the exact spot the game needs me to be in. This results in me just key smashing melee a lot until every around me stops twitching.

I’m still enjoying it, but it is v. glitchy and I understand why people are leaving angry reviews. Especially if they are deeply committed to the immersive elements and were expecting the same level of polish from the Arkham games, which this studio also made.

I’m just casual enough a gamer that I’m enjoying muttering “parkour” to myself as I accidentally fall off buildings and plumet to my death because my graple hook glitched out and went the exact opposite way I’d been aiming.

I’m really just playing it for the characters. It feels like playing a a game written by people who understand the appeal of found family that went hard on the campier elements of the franchise while still maintaining a decent level of aching sadness for the tragedy they’ve endured.

You can feel the group fracturing under the weight of Bruce’s death with Dick doing everything he can to fill the void and stay positive and “normal” for the sake of everyone around him, including Alfred who is devastated but also trying to keep it together. Barbara, mourning an extra loss, is trying so hard to stay level headed and useful for Dick. Being both Oracle and Batgirl while also acting like a fun big sister to Tim who stands out as really young in this iteration.

Sure he’s a kid genius, but he’s also only 16 with a monumental caffeine addiction (you can’t tell me all the energy drinks on the shopping list pinned to the fridge aren’t for him) and mourning the loss of Bruce while also just wanting to do normal teenage shit, like asking the group for help with his art homework and being annoyed that his role as Robin is keeping him from spending time with his online boyfriend.

Jay is very raw and angry and obviously processing his own trauma on top of everything that just happened but even he steps up, trying to be there for Tim, teaming up with Babs to gently pick on Dick when he’s being particularly Boy Wonder-ish. Seeing him stress cook is also a nice added touch as are the photos of him and Bruce working on stuff. Bonding.

Which is another thing I Love. From what we see of him, Bruce is in his absolute DILF element in flashbacks and in recordings. All sad smiles and a gentle, head-shaking tolerance for the absolute ribbing the kids put him through for being too serious and neglecting himself. Not to mention all the pictures of him with Dick and Tim and Jason. And so many of him and Alfred and Ace. (The one on the fridge of him and Alfred showing them adopting Dick at the courthouse almost killed me. They all looked so young and happy.)

I’m getting serious “Bruce is a good dad with a warped sense of humor who hugs his kids and spends quality time with them, actually, and you’re wrong if you write him otherwise” fanon vibes, and that's honestly my favorite Bruce.

It’s basically appealing to everything I love about the franchise while scratching an itch in my brain the way crackfic taken seriously does.

And that’s enough to make me forgive the bad controls and glitches. But I could see it not being enough for some people, especially if you’ve already got poor hand eye coordination. Which I do. But again, I don’t really care about being good at games. I’m just dicking around and having fun wringing dopamine out of the narrative.

[verdemoth]

Maven! Small guy KEENLY aware of the crushing weight of responsibility. Director of Mission Control after Odyssey’s ‘retirement’. Doing their best.

-> Following after their mentor, Maven is the current head of Mission Control, a small team tasked with monitoring the status of expeditions, keeping the portal stable, and maintaining the technological systems that assist in these efforts. Maven’s the one calling the shots. In the case of a hazardous situation, Maven has to make an assessment with what information they have access to and decide what to prioritize. They’re inclined to recall the field team when faced with any untested issue, but the current owners/investors of the whole project aren’t too happy when supplies get wasted ‘for nothing’.

-> In practice they usually just go along with whatever Odyssey advises to the absolute best of their ability. And they Will Not complain.

-> They’re kind of usually too worried about have a personality for the entire duration of a mission. They fixate on the job and fret over it 24/7 until everyone makes it back in one piece.

-> When they can relax, Maven’s got some hobbies. They’re into embroidery, playing niche card and board games, and enjoys science fiction and mystery stories.

-> Their cousin, Perseverance, bullies them relentlessly for being a nerd </3. Even though Perse is the one who writes essays on oscillating genes, or the influences that parasites exert throughout an ecosystem, just for fun, so. >:(

-> Maven and Perse didn’t grow up very close in both a physical, spacial sense as well as an emotional one. Their teens is when they started to connect, when their families moved closer again. Maven babysat fairly often and helped her out with schoolwork, leading to Perse taking an interest in Maven’s aspirations and making them her own.

-> She’s a grown woman now and can look after herself, but Maven’s still worried for her now that she’s joined the team officially. They don’t want to get her killed. But then she goes and pulls some shit to make them reconsider all the effort they’re putting into worrying. Like showing Maven a big fuckoff moth she found by releasing it into their room. Again. (..it was a cool moth though)

-> Maven has to babysit Perse’s terrariums once she starts joining expeditions. Maven does not like crawlies.. but they are committed to upholding the highest standard of care for these creatures. They were reaaaaaally anxious about it the first time, but Perse said they did a great job, and they kind of grew to enjoy it? The feeling of being able to do right by these little animals and keep them safe. They don’t mind it, actually.

-> Maven was just stepping into the leadership role on that fateful day they lost contact with the field team. It was supposed to be straightforward, one of the first missions they’d be commanding with little input from Odyssey, up until it all went very wrong. When the storm hit, they scrambled to manage the crisis. In the time it took to restore communication, Maven was certain they’d gotten three people killed. Instead, they just got one person killed. Like it really makes a difference. They are quite certain that Opportunity’s disappearance and presumed death are their fault and they’re not dealing with it very well.

-> They look up to and respect their mentor a lot and honestly it’s just.. easier to let em overstep and take some responsibility away from them. Maven feels Complicated about it. Relieved, sure. Patronized too. They feel crushed that Odyssey doesn’t seem to trust their ability.. but is e really wrong? They’ve already proven to be inadequate. They’re not sure they’ll ever move past this.

[angelgoeslewd]

Hi, love your omegaverse hc about bsd guys 🩷🩷 I wonder how do you view others like Nikolai and Fyodor as Alphas? how would they be like with their omega?

thank u so much!!! i love u now 💕 also— my quest to omegaverse-ify the world is nearly complete

⚠️ warnings: 18+ content, minors DNI, graphic mentions of violence, brief mentions of manipulative behavior, what can be considered non-con behavior, stalking, kidnapping, drugging, murder, and sexual content. 18+ concepts of Omegaverse, like slick, mating, knotting, heats, and ruts, some BDSM concepts for Fyodor’s part — spanking and talk of role dynamics.

📝a/n: i really hope no one expected this to be light and fluffy. i love my dark twisted messed up little men. also this is way too long for how dark it is :/ sorry.

🌟 this work is being REWRITTEN! check back for the completion check ✅ and a new story with extra content!

[Chuuya, Dazai, and Ranpo here!]

Nikolai

unpopular opinion by the general public and ADA, but Nikolai is actually a decent Alpha!! the only downside is that u basically r in terrorist protection program for the rest of ur life 🤷‍♀️ and your boyfriend murders people in his spare time for fun but that’s a different moral dilemma.

but in all seriousness, Nikolai’s Omega is going to have to be all in from the moment they meet. Nikolai is the same. I get the sense that he lives in a very black-or-white world with little to no greys. If you are down for this man, the first couple of words out of your mouth need to be, “Wow,” followed by, “I need to be your Omega.” Otherwise he’s not going to listen to you and just keep rambling about birds and free will, then murder you. This will give him a moment’s pause, where you will get to plead your case on why you should be his Omega or appeal to his Alpha. Make it good. Nikolai will treat it like a game show and weigh the pros and cons.

If you manage to somehow make him blush, through complimenting his… techniques or get slick at his scent, Nikolai will cut the game short and whisk you away to the nearest bed to claim and knot you immediately. You aren’t getting away after that.

He’d also do very well with an Omega who is more straightforward. Being Fyodor’s second hand can be a bit… complex sometimes, and it definitely wears on him more than he lets on. I see Nikolai having his own twisted logic and Fyodor’s style of being dismissive, forcing his own games to played, and being so underhanded sometimes tires Gogol, regardless of how much he admires Fyodor. He wants to have his riddles untangled. He wants to just be told the truth to his face. An Omega who is blunt will get very far with him. He’d constantly bug you and try to make you smile or laugh. He would commit disgusting crimes in front of you just to see a shocked look on your face. He tie you up and force you to solve his puzzles before a timer runs out just to smell your scent mix with fear. He wants to make you show your emotions. He would love that challenge. Even if you despise him, he’ll still try to claim you. If that doesn’t work, there’s always stalking, kidnapping, and Stockholm syndrome. He can also be very manipulative.

In short, Nikolai will decide to claim you in a split second decision, if he feels like something about you appeals him. There’s no dating. At first.

Nikolai is a very clingy Alpha. Very clingy. I am on the verge of considering him a Yandere. Until he fully trusts you (which will be a while, consider he JUST MET YOU AND ALSO TRIED TO MURDER YOU) you’re gonna be on house arrest. By which I mean that you can go anywhere, it doesn’t really matter because he can find you no matter what, but you can’t talk to anyone. He will kill anyone who tries: Alpha, Omega, or Beta and apologize, lying to your face about them aiding your escape or whatever. He would think it hot if you encouraged him or ignored his actions (not him. his ACTIONS), wouldn’t really care of you scolded him or got angry. Just would shrug and remind you that you’re his Omega, his instincts want to protect you (lielielie- Nikolai is POSSESSIVE). And you better believe he’ll know. He will constantly have a portal open, watching you, ready to grab you at anytime. Not even cashiers are safe so it’s honestly better just to stay wherever he’s put you up and order whatever you need.

Yeah, your job? You’re gonna have to quit. Nikolai’s House Arrest extends to quite literally everyone. Get a new phone with no personal contacts. Make your family think you’ve died. Nikolai will even help you. But once you’ve fallen into his hands, you ARE his. He can amuse you, take care of you, he can be your everything, you don’t need anyone else.

After you’ve gain his trust (or the Stockholm syndrome is in full effect, whichever comes first), he’ll be a bit more lenient and let you out of his sight, but would still feel an awful amount of jealousy in his gut if he spies you talking to other people; God forbid it’s another Alpha. He’d lovebomb the hell out of you, then go and kill them when you’re sleeping off the 3 rounds he put you through. He’d really rather be the only one you talk to.

This Alpha loves to have you by him and would keep you there all the time if he could. He feels off when you aren’t by his side. Unfortunately, due to the nature of his ‘job,’ that’s not always the case. And if he knows there’s even a risk of danger, he’ll leave you in a safe place. Usually an extravagant hotel or a mansion he’s bought just for you in an undisclosed location. It’s usually filled with whatever your heart desires, desires you didn’t even know Nikolai knew about. If he’s just filming more propaganda or torturing, he’ll bring you along if you want. It won’t be pretty, but if you’re into that. Or if you just love him enough to want to do whatever makes him happy.

He would fuck you in the blood if you helped him or came on to him during that time. 100% turns him on seeing covered in the sticky, viscous liquid. Would compliment you on how “red is your color.” Nikolai loves an Omega who gets their hands dirty. Might even drive him into a rut.

Despite his occupation and image, when it comes to his Omega, Nikolai can act like a puppy for your love and affection, but it goes back and forward. He’ll beg you for kisses, other times he’ll just take them. He’ll portal in front of your face when you’re in line to check out and smooch you, leaving everyone confused. He’s a waist grabber too. He loves to pull you against him and feel your warmth as he shoves his tongue down your throat, then pull away like nothing happened and continue whatever rant he was on. He’s also a biter. Loves to mark you with bruises and bites, so… invest in a scarf.

He might seem innocent and innocuous and he partly is, but the choices he gives you are never really your own to decide. Like asking you where you want to go on a date. Which is sweet of him to even allow, considering you’re basically his hostage. You can’t say that you’re too tired, because he’ll whisk you away to Paris despite your objections. He does make it worth it though.

He wants to have his hands on you 24/7. They’re so big and warm too, that it’s really hard not to want them on you. He loves hugging you from behind and resting his chin on your shoulders, one hand sneaking up, one hand sneaking down, fingering you until your slick drips down his wrist and then he’ll bite the tip of his glove… slowly pull them off, tasting you and the leather… and yeah. Rest of your plans be damned. You’re on his knot.

You’re the only one (besides Fyodor, who sees every side of everyone) that usually sees Nikolai’s softer side. He’s the type of Alpha who cuddles you to his chest at night, then wakes you up to breakfast in bed. His sadistic side is somehow quelled by you. He loves when you trace your fingers against his chest and can depend on him to be with you through your heats no matter what. He’ll massage your stomach if the cramps get too bad but it does leave you wondering why he didn’t just knot you like any other Alpha would do, your thoughts trailing back to his “free will” phenomenon. Are these his choices or yours? Do you have any impact on what he does or not?

It’s partly part of his own game. He likes to see what makes you tick, but he refuses to break his favorite toy. He walks the fine line between breaking you in and breaking you completely.

His ruts are another story. Without you, he was rather tame and usually just ignored his wants completely. Of course, he finds a release in other ways… usually by murder. Let’s just make that clear. He’s still quite blood thirsty. But with you…

He’s completely unhinged. Gives into his desires in the worst possible way, free will be damned when he has an Omega, his Omega, on his cock. He’s brutal, so be prepared. Takes you doggy style, jackhammering into you, pressing up against your womb until the pressure is almost unbearable, pulling your hair back, you along with it, contorting you into unnatural positions until he finds his release deep inside of you. Refuses to cum anywhere that’s not inside of you. Leaves you scratched and bruised, hips and hole sore with how rough he is. His knot is huge too. Don’t be surprised if your sheets get bloodied.

He’s super tender with you afterwards though. Pampers you like Sigma or Chuuya would, but it feels so much more intense with him, because he pushes you to your absolute limit, physically. Blankets of some endangered creature that are beyond soft as to not irritate your skin, medication that heals you within a couple of days, which you still don’t understand where he got them or what they were. Baths, rich foods, affection beyond what is normal for him (which is saying a lot.)

Your heats are a toss up. He can either be as mean as he is in his rut, or he’s a complete tease. It’s some of the only times he gets to drive you wild instead, so he takes a lot of enjoy in playing a little cat and mouse with you and your pleasure. He’s either overstimulating you or making you beg. But other parts of it are tender and soft. Like when he helps you make the perfect nest. Or when he’s comforting you through the pain. Or when you’re whispering sweet nothings in his ear as he drives into you, pressing your legs back into a mating press, wondering if these are your true feelings or if this is the heat talking.

Despite the murder, which is a BIG despite, Nikolai is probably in second place for best Alpha you could have. Mainly because of the murder. And his conflicting personality. And the other unsavory practices within your relationship. But he takes care of you so well. And he will always protect you.

Fyodor

Let’s be honest here. How the hell did you even get in this scenario. Fyodor really isn’t one to take an Omega or even look for romantic interest in general, so being here is kinda a realm of extreme speculation. Why are you here? What is so extraordinary about you that led this man to you, first of all, and how do you get him to indulge in his most suppressed self? How do you keep him there long enough to get him to actually mate you? You have to really call him to get this far. You can’t be anyone normal. No lacky of his beliefs or regular person. He doesn’t care about that. You’re borderline his soulmate if you are.

If you do manage to actually get him to take an interest in you and not what you can do for him, not a political move or a piece to be played and discarded, you’re seriously in for it. Fyodor is not an easy Alpha to have.

He just barely ranks above Dazai because he can have his moments, but they’re usually pretty inauthentic and more of something he knows he’s expected to do as your Alpha; most of these moments are in public, but you might find him doing them when he’s running on autopilot too.

I’m not going to comment on how you got him to mate you because I honestly am at a loss for how that would even happen. He’s not one to do that, and feeling that urge, let alone acting on it, is something that he would never thought he’d do, even sadistically, to torture his worst enemies by taking their spoken for Omega, because it means he’s bound to someone. He’s now got someone he has to think about, not because he wants to, but because those fucking primal urges force him to. it’s a distraction to him and his goals.

if you match his intelligence, even with minute differences, he would rather see you as something to toy with. if you don’t, you’re something to be used. It’s an extremely difficult situation where you almost have to be playing him and catch him in a mood where the fact of that doesn’t piss him off too much that he immediately tries to kill you. Maybe more of an innocent game? Where you basically are only toying with him because you like him and want to be with him? Very Harley Quinn like.

Fyodor likes super submissive Omegas. And by “like,” I mean that it would almost be impossible for you to be a more pushy or dominant Omega because Fyodor has the whole power dynamic he likes (which is super unhealthy, dude, go 2 therapy) and refuses any other type of partner. A bratty Omega is ok, but you might want to be heavily masochistic if you go that route.

Fyodor loves spanking. I’m sorry but he does. He likes the feeling of punishing you so intimately. And you taking it like a good little Omega, tears in your eyes as you try to apologize or count his spanks. He’s partial to a belt or his hand. Loves making your ass bruised and nearly bloody. If you do bleed, he loves to sweep it up with his fingers and lick it. He also loves the next day, watching you try to hide your winces as you sit down or as the fabric of your bottoms brush against your ass. It gets him wanting to bend you over his desk and make it hurt all over again.

Speaking of his desk. COCKWARMING OMG. He absolutely adores when you’re below him in anyway, love to make you feel weak and powerless, but especially when he’s got work to do and commands that you keep him and his knot in your mouth until he’s done. You obey like Fyodor’s good little Omega would and he purposely drags it out because he’s an asshole. Likes to grab your hair and thrust down your throat frequently because he likes to hear you cough and gag. Then makes you stand on shaky, half-asleep legs while he fucks you. If you fall, he’ll make you start all over again. Yes. That means being away for ANOTHER 8-14 hours.

Besides his violent streak in sex, life with Fyodor almost feels… cold? He’s very withdrawn from your relationship. Thanks you for breakfast, then excuses himself. You have the rest of the day to yourself until he calls for you. I would seriously love to say that Fyodor would be super snuggly and loving because you’re his special Omega or whatever, but I just don’t think that’s really… in character for him. He will have moments where he enjoys your company though. Even without sex. Sometimes, when he’s in a good mood, he’ll sit you next to him, explain some hacking and coding, maybe twirl a strand of your hair between his fingers. But that’s about it.

Kisses are saved for public image and that’s it. He seriously probably never hugs you :/. The only reason he ranks above Dazai is because despite his intensity in sex and his ice queen personality, it’s really less to deal with then Dazai’s constant inner turmoil. Like Fyodor doesn’t have conflict in his mind. He’s super set in his path and whatever decisions he makes on that journey. You at least don’t expect warmth from this man. Unlike Dazai who acts pretty well. Plus you’re loaded and can do whatever you want 🤷‍♀️ idk kinda works for me

Fyodor will come to care about you more though. Kinda like those typical arranged marriages in movies? He becomes fond of you, I suppose the proper word would be. Like he doesn’t want to lose you, but if he does, oh well. He’ll miss your warm heat wrapped around him and delicious cooking. I’m sorry. Fyodor doesn’t know the meaning of love. He does end up referring to you as His Omega and gives you more important duties around his cult. Will smile at you (AND IT WILL BE A REAL SMILE) and tell you you did a good job. He’ll start to wrap an arm around you and hand you his jacket if he notices you shivering. Maybe even kiss the side of your head a little bit.

Ok. Maybe he’s a bit soft and a bit in love with you, but he will never admit that to even himself.

I really can’t see Fyodor having ruts due to his medical issues. He probably even has problems getting it up sometimes, which is fine, he still enjoys watching you suffer. Or pleasure yourself for him. Whichever. But if he did, they would probably only last a couple of days and actually make him really sick. He probably wouldn’t even be able to knot you. IM SORRY BUT IM BEING REALISTIC.

for p0rn reasons; if he wasn’t anemic, they would be extremely violent. He would be more apt to keeping you close without letting on that he likes you. You don’t realize that most people you talk to end up executed by Fyodor’s own hand. You don’t notice that he’s being walking around with you all day. You don’t realize how he’s glaring at everyone you pass. You do, however, notice that he’s jumping you the minute you get home and actually kissing you. It’s rough, with tongues and teeth, but he’s kissing you. His teeth graze your claim mark again, and he’s biting down, deepening it again. His hands around your waist, pushing you into the bed where he knots you, over and over again. Pushing his cum into you and making you hold it. Fucking you through every one of his knots, even though it burns. Fyodor is a bitey Alpha so you’ll have to clean up a lot of blood after his mating session. You almost wonder if he’s trying to absorb your blood or something.

Your heats will almost never line up with his. If they do, it’s by absolute pure chance. Fyodor is too withdrawn and he stays that way. He can let you in but it’s never for too long. He takes care of you with a knot and makes sure you have food and water, but it’s almost clinical the way he deals with it. Leaves almost immediately after, instructing you to call him when you need him.

(…Later, he’ll sit with you on the bed as your body feverishly aches, stroking the sweaty strands of hair from your forehead, never getting dirty himself but enough tenderness to make you realize that he’s there with you.)

[theresattrpgforthat]

Hi folks, it’s Mint.

I’m on a mini-vacation this week so I’m going to be releasing some recommendation posts for things that aren’t related to requests (easy to queue), and I’ll be back to doing regular rec posts when I get back!

THEME: Mysteries.

I love love love mysteries. I think mysteries might be one of my favourite things to do in a TTRPG; presenting players with a problem and watching them piece together a solution is so fun! There’s a number of different ways to run mystery games - maybe you will find a helpful new tool in the list below! You can also look at the folder of mystery games that I’ve compiled on Itch, if you want more.

The Lurking Fear, by Lyme.

The Lurking Fear is a free, lightweight, simulationist investigative horror ttrpg in the style of classic horror tabletop games. You can use it to run most systemless horror adventures or, with a little work, most adventures for popular horror games.

The Lurking Fear is an exercise in running investigative games through an OSR framework, complete with rolling randomly for your stats, weapons that have dice attached for damage, and a roll-under mechanic to determine whether or not you succeed at any given task. Characters have a Stability track and an Energy track: Stability is lost when they fail to bolster themselves in a stressful situation, while Energy can be lost when you are subjected to paranormal consequences. The game has rules for magic (spells found in tomes), but no spell list, so you’ll likely need to write your own spells or get inspiration from other OSR-style games. Spells are costly, time-consuming, and cost Energy to cast, which I think will make successes feel hard-won and satisfying.

If you want a challenging game that has just the bare bones so that you can scaffold over it, you might want to take a look at The Lurking Fear.

Public Access, by The Gauntlet.

A roleplaying game of analog horror, based on the Brindlewood Bay mystery system!

Public Access is a tabletop roleplaying game about a group of people in 2004—the Deep Lake Latchkeys—who find themselves investigating strange mysteries in and around the town of Deep Lake, New Mexico. In the ‘80s and early ‘90s, Deep Lake was the home of a notorious public access television station called TV Odyssey, the history and fate of which—the station literally disappeared—is the source of much speculation in certain corners of the internet. As the Latchkeys conduct their investigations in Deep Lake, they will become increasingly aware of the central role TV Odyssey plays in everything that’s going on, and will have to face whatever terrible truth lies at the heart of the infamous station...

This one is for the horror fans, especially if you like found footage-style horror. You’ll be playing a bunch of adults returning to their hometown to try and find answers about the disappearance of a television station. Similar to other Carved from Brindlewood games, Public Access uses a day/night cycle, will give you certain moves and repercussions unique to the mode of play you’re currently in. If you like collaboratively creating a mystery as a table, you might want to check out this game.

Suspect 2e, by Arcane Atlas Games.

SUSPECT is a catch-em out game of character creation, memory and mystery. A crime has been committed, and you have to work together to create and then solve it. In Suspect the players take it in turns to play as the investigator and the suspects. The investigator asks questions and the suspects answer, building an ever more complicated web of events. As the suspects slip up and make mistakes the investigator challenges them until they finally accuse the culprit.

This is a great option if you want to try out a duet mystery game, with one person playing the Investigator, and the other playing the Suspects. Each role has special abilities and rules. For example, the Investigator is the only one who has access to the timeline of events, allowing them to sort through the clues and rule out false leads. The Suspects player can use a special ability to shift the Investigator’s suspicion onto a different character, introducing new facts to complicate the case. The game feels like it would be great at replicating Columbo-type stories, with the Investigator slowly going over the facts until they find the only solution that makes sense.

The creator is also collecting different mystery cases that you can play through for this game, which can be found in the Suspect Cases collection. If you love procedural detective fiction, (or maybe if you want to create a mystery for people to play) you might want to check out Suspect 2e!

Junk Noir, by JadeRavens.

You are a malfunctioning robot detective solving mysteries in a noir retro-future.

Junk Noir is a cooperative, zero-prep, GM-less mystery game for 2 or more players.  Players share control of Tracer as the titular robo-sleuth investigates mysteries, visits Locations, meets Characters, finds Clues, and triggers Events. In Junk Noir, you'll dramatize scenes, form connections, make moves, and play to see what happens! 

When you reach a consensus, roll the dice to test your theory. Maybe your theory is correct and you have one last scene to prove it and risk it all! Or maybe your theory is just that, and things are more complicated than you thought. It's time to challenge your assumptions and continue your investigation…

Junk Noir uses similar mechanics to Brindlewood Bay or Paranormal Inc, allowing the players to generate the mystery as they play. However, the game is meant to be run without a GM, all the players embodying the persona of a single robot detective. If you like the noir genre and you want to add a little bit of robot flair, you might want to check out Junk Noir.

Let Justice Be Done, by Mynar Lenahan.

Let Justice Be Done is a one-shot murder mystery game inspired by Brindlewood Bay, Eat The Reich, and Blades in the Dark.

In it, you play ingenious Consultant Detectives who use their skills of deduction to discover (and invent) Clues to frame the wealthy for crimes they absolutely didn't commit. But be careful: If your suspects start to figure out exactly what you're up to, you could find yourself in a world of trouble that they absolutely will not let you escape…

This is a delightful twist on the typical murder mystery, allowing you to construct a false crime as a form of revenge. Pull from a variety of colourful backgrounds to add dice to your roll, using a resolution system similar to Forged in the Dark games to achieve success. This is a great homage to the Benoit Blanc movies, especially Glass Onion. If you bought the TTRPGs for Palestine bundle, you already own this game!

BubbleGumshoe, by Evil Hat.

Someone stole my kid brother’s bike…Someone sabotaged the pep rally…Someone destroyed the Homecoming queen’s reputation…

The world is full of mysteries. It’s up to your group of intrepid teen sleuths to solve them. In BubbleGumshoe, players step into the shoes of high-schoolers solving mysteries in a modern American small town. Discover clues, solve problems, and throw down with enemies in this streamlined RPG based on the GUMSHOE system.

BubbleGumshoe is for the Nancy Drew lovers, mixing the drama of teenage social life with (typically) mundane mysteries. It is built off of the GUMSHOE system, which ensures that players will always find the clues necessary to figuring out the mystery, but rewards successes with more specific or helpful information.

In BubbleGumshoe, your relationships are an integral resource, which you can leverage to get access to locations you might not typically be able to go, knowledge from various experts, and favours from people who like you, or at the very least, owe you one. If you like tropes that involve leveraging social capital in order to bring local troublemakers to justice, you might like BubbleGumshoe.

Myths & Mysteries, by CrlBox.

This is a diceless and rules-light ttrpg.  Encounters receive a difficulty number, which will be determined by cards. Skills are used to reach the difficulty number, without rolling dice. It is just a matter of how much you will exhaust yourself to succeed…

The system doesn't rely on stats, which makes it very conversion friendly.

This is a genre-agnostic ttrpg, allowing you to explore eldritch horror, fantasy intrigue, or Scooby-Doo style adventures. Using a deck of cards, you build your hand and use your cards to determine whether your not you can succeed. Your character has a few things to make certain actions easier: an occupation, which gives you a +1 for any task related to it, and skills, which can be used and/or discarded to give you a temporary bonus.

The entire game can be printed on a brochure, which makes this game easy to travel with and probably also easy to pull out and teach for a one-shot or pick-up game. If you want simple mysteries that you alter to fit whatever genre you like, you might want to check out Myths & Mysteries.

Other Mystery Games I’ve Recommended

Eureka: Urban Investigative TTRPG, by ANIM.

Brindlewood Bay and The Between, by The Gauntlet.

Unlikely Investigators, by Luciano Correa

EYE: A Murder Mystery Generator, by Zak Makes Games.

Fedora Noir, by lessthanthreegames.

[imagine-a-life-like-this]

Sugar and Spice : Chapter 22

Word Count : 0.8k

Warnings : swearing, food mention, mention of sex, mention of divorce, drinking

            “I think I’m ready to move on.” Cheol hated the way her face lit up, the way she squealed and hoped for him to find someone good. But he doesn’t want good, he wants her. No one compares to her, no one will have his heart the way she does.

            “Maybe when you find someone we can go on double dates!” He loves her optimism. Loves that she’s so gullible, that she believes every word that comes out of his mouth. He doesn’t mind playing the long game if by the end of it he has her. As long as she ends up by his side, he’ll wait forever.

            “Double dates would be fun.” He smiles at her, playing the role of a happy friend. A friend excited to go on double dates with his friend. A friend that is completely enamoured with his friend. A friend that isn’t ready to move on at all.

            “Oh! I should get going. I have to get a new dress for tonight.” She took the last sip of her drink as she stood from the table. Cheol wanted to offer to go with her, to pay for the new dress, but he has to play the long game. He has to pretend like he’s going to move on, so he stays silent. She kisses his cheek as she always does when saying goodbye and disappears from his sight. And he can’t wait until she’s his so he’ll never have to watch her leave again.

~

            “You look incredible.” Minho tells her, completely awestruck by the sight in front of him. The way the dress hugs all her curves perfectly, the way the slit goes up her thigh. If they didn’t have somewhere to be, he would fuck her in it.

            “Wait until after the date and you see what’s underneath.” He pulled her into him by her waist, her arms immediately wrapping around his neck. “I love the effect I have on you.”

            “I love you.” She smiles before pressing her lips to his, showing him just how much she loves him with her actions. And he understood every single word.

~

            “Finally. Were you two fucking or something?” Changbin jokes as Minho and Y/n finally show up to the restaurant. They were only 10 minutes late, but Changbin would take any opportunity to tease Minho about being completely whipped for her. Despite he himself being completely whipped.

            “If we were fucking we wouldn’t have shown up at all.” Minho quipped.

            “We’re going to fuck after dinner though.” Y/n added with a smile, giving Minho a quick kiss before sitting down.

            “We didn’t need to know that.” Seungmin rolled his eyes.

            “Oh please! As if you and Felix aren’t going to fuck after this as well.” Hyunjin teased. The table burst into laughter as they watched both of their faces turn red. Y/n loved seeing her friends so happy, so carefree. She loved knowing that they found love, found someone that would give them the world they deserve.

~

            They were 3 bottles of wine deep, joking and laughing and just having a good time. The food was long gone, dessert came and went, but no one wanted to leave quite yet. Conversation flowed like they had all known each other for years. And Y/n couldn’t help but think that this is how it was meant to be. This is where she was meant to end up. And this is how she wants her forever to look. Happy, carefree, and in love.

            “I have an announcement.” Changbin said, standing up from the table holding his glass of wine. All eyes were on him, no one knowing what was going to come out of his mouth next. “I wanted to keep it a secret a little longer, but I feel like now is a good a time as any. Hei and I have decided to get a divorce. We both found someone we love more than we ever loved each other and decided it wasn’t fair to anyone involved for us to stay married.”

            Hyunjin’s eyes immediately met Y/n’s as the table cheered. She could see the pure joy on his face as he stood from the table and pulled Changbin in for a kiss. It’s the happiest she’s ever seen him.

            “A toast to all of us for finding true love.” Minho said, holding up his glass of wine. Everyone grabbed theirs, clinking each glass with smiles on their faces. The hard part was over. All that was left was love and happiness.

back to masterlist

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[another-lost-mc]

you are so real with being disappointed on nightbringer cause i feel the same way

Oh, I have complicated feelings about Nightbringer.

(I’ll use a Read More link here because of vague OG S4 discussion.)

I didn’t whale in OG but I was much more willing to spend extra money chasing cards I wanted. I was really motivated to catch up on all the story content too since I didn’t start playing until the later part of the pandemic. I know S3 and S4 aren’t the greatest bits of story-telling ever written but I had hopes for more Celestial Realm content (a visit and maybe Michael appearance) in S5 based on where Simeon’s storyline was heading.

(I usually picture MC traveling to the CR to see Michael in S5, and maybe another visit of new angels to the Devildom in S6 once tensions are resolved.)

Overall I really liked getting involved with the fandom and I started posting fanfics here. I was so happy with my curated little card collection of favs — Lucifer was my original favourite, followed by Simeon, Barbatos, Solomon and Asmo — and exploring the game with my writing.

And then Nightbringer was announced.

After I spent probably too much money collecting all the HDD cards I wanted not long before that.

And the cards weren’t going to be transferable to the new game! ISN’T THAT FUN?! (Solmare logic, probably.)

I mean, I get it. It’s the nature of gacha games and the motivation is to grow the player base and revenue potential.

Sure, whatever.

And some parts of Nightbringer are fine, while other parts leave me desperately wanting more. Detailed lore that ties into the OG game and characters I care about, more in-depth characterization. Another slow burn love interest would be nice too since NB completely changed the direction of Barb’s development compared to OG S4 (side-eyes Mephisto and Raphael as new potentials). Also, as time goes on, I find myself not really caring who Nightbringer is. Does it even matter anymore? Like…whatever, you do you, buddy. lol

My face if they reveal it’s Barbatos/Solomon/Michael all along:

Oh, and more ROMANCE? Hello??? The babysitter role and goofy family dynamics are satisfying to a point but then it gets stale. Some of the Devilgrams are boring too, and don’t get me started on the EVENTS. I enjoyed the vampire one last year that sparked a random writing frenzy of vampire AU fics, but so many of the events fall flat for me. Anyone else just use S or A Rank skips to breeze past the story bits because 90% of it is boring as hell? Yeah, same.

It sounds like a lot of complaints, but there’s still more about the game I love or I wouldn’t be here: my favs, most of the artwork, the music! The new Dateables song is so goofy - what are those lyrics? - but they didn’t autotune Simeon to death and he sounds so much better than he did in Question Love (the only song whose remix I like better than the original).

I love the people I’ve met in this fandom and being able to share story ideas and headcanons. It’s so exciting when new lessons and cards are announced because the player base gets invigorated again (even if things fall a little flat upon arrival). I’ve splurged on some merch (official and fan-made) and I love being self-indulgent and commissioning artwork of my favs and MC together.

Oh, and I love my OCs. 😚 @ them all.

[into-september]

"Destruction" is the worst episode of Miraculous Ladybug

Oh hey guys, remember way back in April or something when I said I was doing this? Well, the one year anniversary of its premiere is a suitable time to post this, particularly since yesterday saw the airing of the last piece of canon to come out in a while, which happened to be set immediately after these events.

With the always obligatory reminder in place that I generally think that “Miraculous: Tales of Ladybug and Cat Noir” is in fact a good TV show whose appeal potentially reaches beyond its merchandise-mandated target group, it has an unflattering pattern of introducing the juiciest story threads and then just… do nothing about them.

The topic of today’s sermon isn't in isolation the worst offender. But it is thanks to this that the worst offender happens at all, so I'm not gonna be nice about it.

Scroll past to skip the negativity.

So, “Destruction”, possibly the most eagerly awaited episodes of out S5 if you don’t count all the false advertisement that was “Revelation”. I remember finding this episode uncharacteristically charmless for this show when I first watched it. They've been onto heavy topics before, but those episodes still had that je ne sais quoi that gives this show such heart. But re-watching "Destruction" I found it lacking already from the first scene, and felt it only in glimpses. It's just not fun.

The episode is also poorly paced, no way around it. It is inexplicably a flashback to two episodes ago which is not evident from the start. More than half the runtime technically consists of Marinette and Alya having a sleepover. The battle and its game-changing outcome is over at 12 minutes into the episode, which is barely past the halfway point. After that, we spend five minutes - a quarter of the episode's full runtime - on a flashback re-playing the same battle but now with verbal exposition explaining Marinette's clever plan. Mind that the confrontation between Marinette and Gabriel lasts for all of seven minutes, meaning that the flashback is nearing the length of the battle itself.

To top it of, it's bogged down with lengthy exchange between Gabriel and the kwamis just to make clear that the haters on the twitter were totally wrong when they bitched about Orikko being OP because actually its powers were something else than we established last season. Here's a bonus plot hole which has nothing to do with everything else I'm going to nag about: Orikko allegedly can't give out the powers of time-travel because no kwami can replicate another kwami's powers. Except for Nooroo and Duusu, I guess, who have done so on several occasions. One of the more remarkable being the episode which first heralded the event that "Destruction" set in motion: "Timetagger".

And who can forget that this was the second time in three episodes where Ladybug and Cat Noir had Monarch at their mercy but spent so much time giving triumphant speeches that he gets away.

Or that that in fact was the second time on the same night.

But while those things certainly make the episode poor, they are not what makes it the worst.

What makes this episode the worst isn't its technical failures, but about the way it leaves its feces all over the themes and the character arcs it seemed like the show had been building up until this point. Moreover: in the role it plays in S5 and the Agreste storyline, and how the show's refusal to touch it again creates a black hole in the season at large, and arguably in the show as a whole.

I. THE INESCAPABLE CONTEXT OF WHAT CAME BEFORE IT

The art of telling a story is the art of highlighting what matters and leaving out what doesn’t. In a well-crafted story, no matter the medium, no detail is insignificant. Every word is carefully chosen, every line or hue made with intention. The curtains aren’t blue just because, and Miraculous Ladybug has made too many meta jokes to hide behind the claim that it’s just a silly rom-com for kids. It has trained its older audience into looking for context and connections; after “Mr. Pigeon 72”, you can’t insist that nothing that happened earlier in this show matters for what happens later. Titles matter a lot in a show where episodes are titled after the villain-of-the-week who usually is the thematic mirror to what our heroes are going through.

“Destruction” is the fourth episode somehow named after Adrien, and the third somehow named after Plagg. You bet this matters.

As some might know, "Kuro Neko" is not my favourite episode. That's not to say I don't like it! It's cute! It's playing a really interesting scenario! We get Plagg hanging out at chez Marinette! But to enjoy it, I have to willfully ignore the storytelling incompetence it flagrantly displays. Because the moment you peek beneath the surface of the events happening to consider theme, motifs, and narrative parallels, it's just

"Kuro Neko" is the second episode that is named after Cat Noir. The first one was "Cat Blanc". There is a thematic connection between the two; not a very clear one and probably not an intentional one, but all the same: both episodes are about an alternative to Cat Noir. One is the result of his father's violence; the other is Adrien's own attempt to become more like the person he presents around his father. They also both show us Plagg and Adrien negotiation Adrien's relationship to Ladybug, and how Ladybug and Cat Noir negotiate that same thing.

"Cat Blanc", for all its apocalyptic visions, starts and ends with hope. It starts with Marinette’s hope at confessing to Adrien, to Adrien’s hope in finally knowing Ladybug’s identity and knowing her like he’s yearned for for three seasons. Those hopes lead to disaster, but the episode ends with Ladybug finding Cat Noir on the Montparnasse Tower, where he is singing his lullaby about the kitty being "all alone without his Lady". As is fitting, Marinette breaks the pattern: after having just witnessed a world turned to destruction because the two of them loved each other, she leans her head on his shoulder in perhaps the most romantic gesture she's ever given him.

"Kuro Neko", in contrast, starts with Adrien resigning the job when he realises that Ladybug no longer needs him and that makes him feel bad. It ends with him coming back and verbally accepting that Ladybug doesn't owe him any exclusive treatment; he isn't her unique partner, just one of many. Where the final scene of "Cat Blanc" seemed to confirm that Ladybug is indeed the answer to Adrien's solitude, the final scene of "Kuro Neko" and its continuation in the first scene in "Risk" both make clear that the opposite is now status: Adrien has to accept the painful fact that as much as Ladybug might be the most important person in his life, Cat Noir does not hold a similar space in Ladybug's.

(The end of “Strike Back” of course claims to remedy this, but those words don’t ring very true when to Marinette’s knowledge, nothing of what went wrong today had anything to do with her keeping secrets from Cat Noir. More damning: Marinette never follows up on her purported regret. In all of S5, she never once sits down to share all those secrets with Cat Noir. Status from "Kuro Neko" still stands, and Adrien is fine with that now. This has nothing to do with the many problems “Destruction” creates, but talking about “Kuro Neko” by necessity means talking about how it wasn’t fixed even if they put the words in Marinette’s mouth. And now back to our scheduled programming)

"Cat Blanc" and "Kuro Neko" by their very existence bring up a thorny topic: That Adrien being Cat Noir isn't wholly unproblematic, and that both Adrien as an individual and Ladybug as the Guardian might have legitimate reasons to question that choice. This has always been obvious to the viewer who knows Hawkmoth’s identity, but the show itself eventually starts calling attention to that from an entirely different angle - namely that of his powers.

Lest we forget: The first episode of S4 that aired wasn't the first episode chronologically: It was "Furious Fu", wherein we learn that The Order of the Guardians has it out for Plagg specifically, and where Ladybug's status as The Guardian is almost revoked on the grounds that she's letting him run around unsupervised. This question of Plagg's whereabouts comes up again in the only episode that is named after Adrien sans Plagg: "Ephemeral", a re-play of “Cat Blanc” except not good. This whole subplot is quickly forgotten, though it being the only one of Su-Han's complaints that weren't about him being a boomer, it's also worth remember that "Destruction" technically happens a couple of hours after he made his last appearance. One might expect that his one consistent lesson would be important enough to echo a bit in the episode where it’s proven to be justified.

"Destruction", as not only one very early episode of the season promising to finally bring about some significant and not the least permanent changes to their lives, but indeed an episode happening on the same night as Ladybug's declaration of regret and Cat Noir's renewed declaration to be her partner, would by its title and its topic seem like the obvious place to finally resolve what "Cat Blanc" and "Kuro Neko" both asked us to question: The existential terror of Plagg's powers, why it is that Adrien is uniquely chosen to temper them at Ladybug’s side, and how Adrien feels about being the one to carry that responsibility.

Yeah. Well.

II. ADRIEN'S PRESENCE IN "DESTRUCTION"

Where "Kuro Neko" and "Cat Blanc" place significant focus on Adrien Agreste in his civillian life, in "Destruction" he appears on screen for a total of 25 seconds - most of which are another flashback to a previous episode, and whose purpose is to highlight Gabriel's hurt from the cataclysm, not Adrien's thoughts about what is happening.

Cat Noir's presence is also marginal. Three minutes of screentime pass from his first appearance until the battle is over. Said battle is the turning point in the war between the heroes and Monarch, thanks to neither Ladybug's powers nor Monarch and all the kwamis, but Monarch using Cat Noir's powers for an impulsive act of self-mutilation. Cat Noir is distraught over this, turning desperate when Monarch first start toying with the idea and being near tears after he carries it out.

I'll get back to the impact of this event, but for now I'll point out that the aftermath is brief: After Monarch escapes, our heroes have this exchange:

LB: We had him, we almost had him! The kwamis were safe, they were right here! CN: I cataclysmed him! I can't believe this, I just cataclysmed someone! Granted it was Monarch, but - there was a real person behind that mask, and it must have hurt him terribly! Milady, you gotta fix this! LB: Cat Noir, Monarch just ran away with my lucky charm! Without it, I can't fix anything. I can't call on my powers and undo the effect of the cataclysm. There's nothing I can do...

We then cut to the slumber party, where Marinette tells Alya that she and Cat Noir "split up" immediately after, and Alya comforts her. From this point in the episode, Cat Noir and Adrien only appear in flashbacks. First a fifty-second flashback wherein Marinette sets up her convoluted plans, then a few seconds of him moving his statue in the wax museum before Monarch appears.

In the episode that more than anything should thematise Adrien, Plagg's powers, and his relationship to his father, Adrien is on screen for a whooping four minutes and twenty seconds.

And because I am that devoted to proving my point, I went and timed all of Alya's on-and-off appearances, which clocked in at a total of five minutes and six seconds.

Alya is of course core to the slumber party which frames the setting of the entire episodes. Moreover, it is with Alya that the emotional arc of the episode ends: it starts with Marinette tormenting hersef watching a Ladyblog report about Monarch's recent win, for which Alya chastises her. The last scene (before Gabriel pulverises the miraculous) has Alya reassure Marinette that she will get the kwamis back. When she regrets her lack of superpowers, Marinette in turn reassures her that Alyas true superpower is being her friend. The journey of the episode was for Marinette to stop blaming herself for messing up, and learning to rely on Alya's support in the new turn the war has taken.

...

IN THE EPISODE WHERE ADRIEN KILLS HIS FATHER.

III. SIR NOT-APPEARING-IN-THIS-FILM

In the episode where Gabriel commits suicide on his son's miraculous, here are some things that got more screentime than the son forced into using his only source of liberation to kill his father:

Flashbacks to past events (four minutes and fourty-five seconds)

Alya (five minutes six seconds)

The kwamis (six minutes and nine seconds)

Bet you can't guess which one is the only kwami who doesn't appear in this episode!

...okay, and Duusu, but you get the point. In the episode detonating the nuke that is the gruesome potential of Plagg's powers, and the potential damage Adrien might deal with them, Plagg never appears on screen.

In the episode highlighting the presence of the kwamis and their importance to their holders, the kwami whose presence is the most thematically tied to his holder's character arc is completely absent.

In the episode irreparably going into the only kwami whose powers is straight up murder, the kwami who The Guardians have singled out specifically as particularly dangerous, the kwami whose irresponsible nature has previously caused problems both to Adrien privately and Cat Noir professionally, said kwami is never even mentioned.

It's almost as if we're not supposed to remember that it is because of his presence that this whole tragedy was possible.

IV. THE EXISTENCE-DEFINING HORROR OF A CATACLYSM GONE WRONG

And ain’t that a funny one, when the gruesome potential in Plagg’s powers was the driving factor in Adrien’s first true crisis as a hero?

Marinette faced her moment in "Origins", where she gave up on her miraculous after the first disastrous attempt. She knows that she is the only one who can do something about the situation, but refuses out of her own lacking courage. She only becomes Ladybug of her own choice when she realises that she can save Alya's life. After this, Marinette never again questioned her place. She would grieve the burden on occasion, but she never once thought anyone else could do better.

Adrien, as we all know, was the polar opposite: he jumped right into it without reading the manual, had to have Ladybug pick up the pieces after a rash cataclysm, and never doubted his calling again until he realised what Plagg’s powers could do when used on a living being.

The NYC special has Adrien quit for reasons that had nothing to do with being unsatisfied with Ladybug's HR policies. It is in part because he effed up his duty as Paris' substitute guardian, but it's certainly also because of the recent horror he just witnessed: his hand forced by someone else nearly killed Ladybug, and killed Uncanny Valley instead as she stepped between them. Adrien just saw a mother weeping over her daughter's corpse, and how only the lucky presence of Ladybug's powers could undo the damage caused by his, unintentional thought it might have been. Adrien would of course never kill anyone on purpose, but Uncanny Valley’s temporary malfunction was a brutal display of what would happen if he stumbled the wrong direction with the gun loaded. Ladybug might have the duty to protect Paris, but Cat Noir has the duty to not to disintegrate people on touch.

The show never before discussed the weight of this burden in Adrien’s presence. “Cat Blanc” did it from Marinette’s side, but this never was a consistent story thread, only briefly brought up as her remembering why his knowing her identity is a bad idea. The sabbatical in “Kuro Neko” has nothing to do with Plagg or with Adrien’s sense of duty, and where you’d think this would be where Marinette finally brings up the issue bridging the NYC special and “Cat Blanc”, neither of the two are as much as alluded to. That Adrien has the power of murder has yet to be explicitly discussed in the show proper, but in combination with his personal relationship to Hawkmoth being a ticking irony bomb, the question of can he even bear it is inevitable.

That Adrien’s post as Cat Noir wasn’t as given as Marinette’s as Ladybug is echoed in the amount of times that Adrien has either quit or at least contemplated doing so (“Syren”, NYC special, “Wishmaker”, “Kuro Neko”). He likes being Cat Noir more than Marinette likes being Ladybug, but he lacks her iron certainty in the role. It is notable, then, that THE ONE TIME where Marinette questions her part, it is after Cat Noir has quit. She says this, out loud, in words. When Cat Noir’s powers become too heavy for Adrien to carry, then Ladybug, too, disappears.

So surely "Destruction" must be the point where this is finally comes together - where Adrien's history of quitting meets his ultimate crisis, where his powers abused on a human being of flesh and blood forces him into confronting the potential cost of being this particular hero, which will foreshadow the ultimate choice he’ll have to take: between being Cat Noir and being his father’s son. And where his choice, in turn, will define whether Ladybug can exist.

Or not.

Maybe we'll never again have Adrien think about how he probably murdered a man. Maybe we'll just - oh I don't know.

Have him start trying to cataclysm people?

Repeatedly?

While showing none of the horror at himself which he clearly had in the aftermath of accidentally cataclysming the villain responsible for his later victims’ possession?

And in the end, after never calling attention to Adrien’s new and trigger happy ways, we’ll have him give in to his fear, claim that he isn’t strong enough to responsibly use Plagg’s powers, and send his miraculous away for Ladybug to use alone, because it turns out that “Kuro Neko” was right and the NYC special was wrong: she can be Ladybug without him.

Growth, amirite.

V. IN THIS HOUSE WE DON’T TALK ABOUT PATRICIDE

Dramatic irony was the main engine driving "Miraculous Ladybug" from the start, and it was Adrien who bore the brunt of it. Not only did he spend four and a half seasons in unrequited love with a girl who rejected him for himself; he spent five seasons doing weekly battle against his own father.

The superpower war between father and son isn't just a source of story tension, however: it is inextricably mirrored in their relationship as family, where the father is openly abusive and the son is magically incapable of protesting. The show repeatedly makes A Point about how the freedom Adrien so wants, is one that he only gets through being Cat Noir, and the only way Adrien is capable of fighting his father - albeit ignorant of it - is with Plagg's powers.

Cat Noir defeating Hawkmoth was necessary not just for his story as a superhero, but as his character arc as a normal boy.

And in "Destruction", this is exactly what happens. Thanks to Plagg's powers, the path to Adrien's freedom is finally paved, in the most gruesome and unwanted manner possible. Adrien might not get the big cathartic show-down with his evil father, but technically he was the one to bring him down.

But we don't talk about that. Except for his one (1) line after Monarch escapes with Ladybug's lucky charm, Adrien never again brings up the fact that his being careless with a cataclysm certainly maimed a man, by precedent (Aeon) possibly killed him. Rather than a story arc about Adrien being afraid of his own powers, it’s only now that he starts aiming it at people when he’s under emotional duress. This could of course have been one hell of a story point if it was intentional, but by all accounts, it wasn’t. When Adrien never again reflects on his having probably murdered a man, or reasons that Monarch is probably fine since he’s clearly still around so maybe a cataclysm isn’t so bad, and he never dwells on his nearly murdering two of his friends, there can’t have been any connection intended here. Moreover: when Adrien is scared of his miraculous towards the end, it’s not about its capacity for normal murder when he’s having a bad day, but its capacity of ending the world if he happens to be akumatised.

Gabriel is likewise disinterested in the cause of his impending disintegration. You’d think the man would feel some kind of special resentment towards Cat Noir and his powers, you could think this was where he’d get to re-thinking his relationship to the two people who are sitting on the keys to solving all his problems. Maybe he’d start doubting himself now, bearing the ultimate testament to his magical hubris. But no. The cataclysm wound is there and it’s a problem, but the reason it happened is completely irrelevant to the man who did this to himself and unknowingly, to his son.

That is almost as mind-blowing as the fact that they really had a straight up patricide happen on screen. Sure, death was never the intention of either of the two parties, and Adrien certainly holds no blame for what happened. But Gabriel must have at least known what he was risking, and even if the soft-hearted Adrien would somehow reason away the gravity, Plagg would certainly now. By its very nature, this one cataclysm drags out and distils a plethora of questions about both Adrien’s role as Cat Noir, about Gabriel’s vision of himself and his goals, and about their relationship not as father and son, but as villain and hero. The gruesome narrative irony looming over all this is in that regard just the icing on the cake.

There is certainly an Oedipal layer to the drama of Gabriel and Adrien, though the often more scandalous incestuous angle is considerably downplayed here. Even so: By the denouement of S5, Adrien has successfully killed his father and set up a home with his mother. That really happened, but we’re sure not going to investigate how this influenced the relationship between two nemesis, between father and son, between Adrien and his kwami.

The cataclysm in “Destruction” turned Adrien from anguished shoujo love interest to the hero of a greek tragedy, but the show is dead set on pretending that it didn’t.

VI. SO THEN WHAT WAS THE POINT

In isolation, "Destruction" comes across as weird more than anything. It's named after Adrien's kwami, it spends an inordinate amount of screentime on Adrien's father, it reaches back to Adrien's perhaps most defining moment as Cat Noir as it fundamentally changes the game between our heroes and our villains as one of them is finally dealt a damaging blow - which in turn sets Adrien's life down a path towards tragedy that must be interfered with for him to have a happy ending by the end of the season.

And yet, Adrien is a peripheral presence in it. Marinette and Gabriel dominate the screentime, Alya and the kwamis are consistently present as the thematic chorus at their respective sides throughout, the episode plays its events twice in order to make it clear that Ladybug is too clever for Monarch's miraculous, the emotional arcs that are followed are the follow-up on where Marinette and Alya stand after the disaster in "Strike Back" as well as Gabriel's renewed vigour. Adrien's only contribution to the episode is to follow Ladybug's instructions and to make clear that his relationship with his father is still awkward. The episode depicts probably THE most important event of the show, but this event is treated almost as an afterthought, and the horrors of it are confined to one (1) line of dialogue from Cat Noir.

The only thing in “Destruction” that is brought up in later episodes is that Gabriel is now actively dying. If they wanted for Gabriel to live on a countdown for his date with the grim reaper, there were countless other ways about it: Have it be his use of too many miraculous which backfires, have him having used the peacock before it was fixed, have it be too much evil on the hands of Nooroo, have him get a serious call from his doctor, have him screw up Tomoe's machinery, have him develop a drug problem. This is a fictional narrative; its twists and turns are absolutely in the hands of the writers, teenage girls being irredeemable or not. It was never vital that this happened by cataclysm specifically.

So what was the point, then? Did we truly turn our magical girl show into a Greek tragedy for the shocked pikachu faces only?

The one thing I somehow haven't seen people bring up, is that "Destruction" makes it impossible for Adrien to learn Monarch's identity. According to the writers themselves, the reason lies in two of the other episodes named after him: "Cat Blanc" and "Ephemeral", wherein he learns his father's identity and is promptly akumatised. This is of course bullshit: both these cases relied not on Adrien learning his father's identity, but on Gabriel specifically scheming to traumatise Adrien with both the Hawkmoth reveal AND the fact that he's been living in the same house as his mother's dead body for the last year or two (timeline here is spectacularly contradictory). There was anothing inevitable about this. You're the writers. You could've set up a scenario where Adrien didn't learn about his father's crimes as an act of psychological warfare, and where he'd have the time to absorb it, to grieve and to find support by the time he'd confront him with it. Having every person close to Adrien keep life-defining secrets from him “for his own good” is, by god, not a good look on anyone involved here. Still it’s understanable, at least for those who aren't either adults or gods of destruction.

"Destruction", however, serves as an explanation for the gaping plot hole in the epilogue: Marinette tells Alya, she tells Su-Han. The one she doesn't tell, though?

The partner who was at her side before Alya or Su-Han ever appeared, and stood by her in far worse storms. Because telling Cat Noir the truth would mean telling Cat Noir that he dealt Gabriel Agreste the killing blow, and ain't that a nifty way to ensure that Marinette won't. Because if Adrien does learn Monarch's identity and the truth about his fall in future seasons, Emilie better hide those garment pins.

The truly damning part of "Destruction" isn't so much what the episode itself does. It's what it doesn't do. It's the storylines it cuts short and leaves behind, and it is the storyline it by its very existence introduces, but which the show refuses to touch.

Per title and content both, "Destruction" should be the culmination of thematic storylines from "Cat Blanc", the NYC special and "Kuro Neko". It’s not; it’s not even about Adrien, and Plagg isn’t even present in it. Moreover: its lacking presence on future episodes make it painfully evident that ambitions, there were none. Those storylines were either aborted like Adrien picking up Felix's spyglass in the S4 finale, or the show never did mean for there to be such a thing as "layers" to this story about a boy who becomes a hero to unknowingly break free from his superhero father.

The real reason why "Destruction" is the worst episode of Miraculous: Tales of Ladybug and Cat Noir is that it obliterates the most cohesive character arc this show had going for it, and that this was done on purpose.

[miscretis]

Discord Mod!Ronin x Discord Kitten!Reader (G.n) [PART 3/FINALE OF A CRACK FIC TAKEN SERIOUSLY]

WRITERS NOTE

Part 3/3 is finally out now! It's been a good few days since I started this series and it has been really fun to write! I'm appreciative of the support given towards this series and I hope that y'all will continue to support me, my artworks, and my writing! Yes you read that right, this is the finale. This is really rushed because I wanted to start on a new AU, a new project. It's going to be another Ronin x Reader but I promise it's a good one! Now, sit back and enjoy the finale of Discord mod!Ronin x Discord Kitten!Reader (g.n)

CW:

-Mentions of murder

- bad and rushed writing

-cringe.

Months flew past and you were slowly wrapping up the novel for a nice and bittersweet ending. You checked your calendar and realised that today was Valentine’s day! What's so exciting about it anyways? It's not like anyone is going to ask you out…

Until…

@goreboy is calling you!

What is he calling me for?

Curiosity was starting to engulf you so you decided to pick up the discord call. pick up the discord call. As you picked up the call, the wine red hair man appeared on the screen before you, a cheeky grin on his face.

“What’s up my darling daredevil? The devil has come to wish you a Happy Valentine’s day,” Ronin snickered.

You rolled your eyes, “Very funny Ronin, very funny.”

He chuckles, “What? Aren’t you thankful that your boyfriend is here for you?

“More than thankful.” Your tone dripped with sarcasm.

“The kitten’s feisty as ever, I like that. But, my patience is running out, writer darlin’.”

Wait..he knows who I am? How?!?! I have been concealing my identity just fine for months!

However, panicking wouldn’t help you in any situation, so you took deep breaths before replying, “ I’m not scared of you, Ronin. You’re just taking this intense role play way too seriously!”

What I said only fueled his amusement, his voice distorted into a maniacal laughter, “Oh darling. When was it ever roleplay? You’ve been playing my game for the longest time, and you still haven’t realised!”

You were surprised. No, in shock. Wait no, do you even know how you feel at this point? You’ve been fooled, utterly bamboozled. You’re like a mouse in a mouse trap, stuck in a sticky situation. The Devil’s Butcher is right in front of you on your screen. It only took you 5 months to notice.

You were utterly speechless.

“What? Cat got your tongue?”

”I know your name, Ronin. I could easily expose you.”

“So what is it?”

You ponder for a while, you only said that out of spite.

“Oh come on, don’t tell me you don’t know your boyfriend’s full government name despite dating me for a few months already! I’ve been whispering it to you.”

You quickly toggled off the calling screen and went to search through Ronin’s DMs, you realised the way he typed his words before calling you was weird…

Soon, it clicked.

“You’re Ronin Beaufort.”

Ronin’s eyes glimmered in pure excitement. You could tell that exhilaration was pumped through his veins, “Hah! You impress me, darling. It’s Ronin Beaufort, the Devil’s Butcher, yours truly. Meet me in Purgatory.”

14th February 2024, 8.50pm. You arrived at Purgatory, the very alley where the Devil’s Butcher gets his hands stained red. Adrenaline pumps through your veins, your heart rate quickens and your hands clammy. You couldn’t believe you’re meeting up with a serial killer, your boyfriend.

He is a serial killer but he is also my boyfriend. Will he kill me or not?

At this point, it doesn't anymore. By agreeing to come along, you've already sealed your fate. As you walked along the alleyway, you saw graffiti all over the wall. It gave it more of an eerie vibe since murder literally takes place here.

Suddenly, you heard a blood curdling scream. You turned around to check your surroundings. Something's definitely up but you couldn't muster the courage to check it out. So, you stay at your current position, waiting for Ronin to come.

Time passes by and he still has yet to come. So, you decided that it was just a prank. Ronin is the type to pull these kinds of pranks anyways.

“Oh writer darling, getting impatient already? Don't worry, I'm right here!” Ronin creeps up from your back and whispers into your ears. You turned out and gasped out in surprise.

Oh god, it's not a prank. It's the Devil’s Butcher in the flash!

But as the wise man says, panicking doesn't solve anything.

Ronin chuckles, “So we meet!”

“Always the devil, Ronin Beaufort.”

“Aren't you a pleasure?” Ronin walks in closer, “Gotta say, meeting you in person got me feeling some typa’ way. And I wonder how you feel about….well…”

Ronin lets out a maniacal laugh, it stirs up some type of feeling in your chest, your cheeks flare up a pretty red.

“Do you like me now?”

“Yes.”

“Oh just speak the truth! Anything but the truth!”

He whispers into your ears, “Write me a love note, darling.”

“I know your name. I could expose you.”

“Coulda, woulda, shoulda. You could end me. You should end me. But would you end me?”

“...”

“I don't think so! Where's the boys in blue? Why's it just us in my favourite gruesome alley? Why's that after knowing who I am, you still wanna see me?”

“So why did you even invite me to the server?”

“I did it for you. You were starving for inspiration, so I gave you insatiability.”

“...”

“You wanted inspiration, so I became your muse. You wanted love, so I gave you love. Isn't that everything you ever wanted?”

“...”

“Why didn't you call the cops? There were so many opportunities that you missed out on!”

“...”

“If I may…I would say you're a little too in love…”

"..."

“So, what would'ja do now? Taste the feeling of metallic death by my crowbar? Or ya gonna kiss me? Or are you gonna kill me? I got a knife right here! ” He lets out a dark chuckle as he closes up the gap between the both of you, pinning you to the wall.

You clenched your teeth, dang it. Ronin really stirred your heart up. If you kill him, you'll be guilty of a crime. If you kiss in, you'll give in.

But fuck it…who cares if you give in or commit a crime anyways? You've gone so far

You pulled him close and grabbed the knife, Ronin dropped his crowbar out of surprise. You've thrown the knife away and leaned him into a heartwarming kiss!

Euphoria spread through both of your bodies and released the unsolved tension between the two of you. You have danced with the devil and now he has now fully corrupted you, having you completely wrapped around his finger. You're now his, he's now yours.

The end.

[jujumin-translates]

★ Main Story | Act 13 - Budding Spring | Chapter 17 - Family Meeting

Tsuzuru: Chikage-san didn’t run away today.

Itaru: He was rushing to get his futon ready before I was.

Chikage: That’s because you kept just mindlessly playing your game.

Masumi: It’s annoying having to drag all our futons in here every time we do this.

Citron: I will put down my sheeping rag now!

Tsuzuru: Please just say sleeping bag.

Itaru: Well, sleeping here can only mean one thing.

Sakuya: Yeah. I wanted to get to try and get to know the stage a little better again.

Tsuzuru: …I’ve been trying to be careful and not get too worked up about it, but I can’t help but keep thinking about the Fleur Award.

Itaru: I always thought that if we all just did theater the way we always do, we’d one day be recognized and win the Fleur Award, but…

Itaru: Then the rankings came along and reminded me that things aren’t that easy IRL.

Chikage: The Fleur Award system has changed, so that’s understandable, but even if they hadn’t changed, we probably would’ve run into the same wall.

Masumi: If we want to stop worrying about rushing things, doesn’t that mean we should just stop thinking about the Fleur Award?

Tsuzuru: God, I wish…

Sakuya: Yuzo-san said that this isn’t the end of the Fleur Award, so there’s no need to rush things, but if we miss out on this one, it’ll be another two years until the next one happens…

Citron: In two years… I wonder what we will all be doing then~?

Tsuzuru: Hmm… I’d have graduated from college by then…

Masumi: I’d be on my fourth year.

Sakuya: Aside from you two, the rest of us are already done with school, so there might not be that much that’s different for us.

Chikage: Conversely, could any of you have imagined being here two or three years ago?

Itaru: Hell no. I would’ve been like, “Theater, what’s that?”.

Masumi: I never thought I’d end up doing theater.

Citron: I had never imagined doing it either, because I was planning to travel all over the world~.

Tsuzuru: If someone told me I’d get to be writing scripts as an in-house writer like this, I would’ve called them delusional.

Sakuya: And I would’ve been really surprised if someone told me I’d be making a living as an actor with the people I love!

Tsuzuru: Putting it like that, it’s like we’re all living in a future we only could’ve dreamed of back then.

Sakuya: Yeah. Being able to gather a group of trusted friends and continue to perform with them in a stable theater company…

Itaru: But there’s no guarantee that we’ll still be doing this two years from now.

Chikage: Maybe that’s just because our current selves are changing in ways we can’t even imagine.

Citron: If that is the case, I absolutely want to change for the better~.

Sakuya: Two years from now, I want to be standing in the future we’re dreaming of now.

Masumi: If we keep that in mind, what should we do for the upcoming Spring Troupe performance…

Tsuzuru: Obviously, we want to have fun with it ourselves, but our desire to entertain the audience has gotta be unwavering, too.

Itaru: On top of that, we wanna improve our rank and snag ourselves a spot among the nominees.

Chikage: That’s the goal of the entire company.

Sakuya: Aside from that, I knew I wanted more people to be aware of how much fun theater can be after doing the workshop.

Sakuya: And of course, that goes for MANKAI too.

Chikage: That’s why it’s important to boost our popularity and broaden our reach. It’d be even better if we could earn some more streaming votes too.

Itaru: To some extent, if we wanna take on the role of top batter, it’ll be our job to get those results and make a breakthrough.

Masumi: But it’s because we’re too busy feeling like that that we’re sitting here accomplishing nothing.

Tsuzuru: Can’t deny that.

Sakuya: …

Masumi: …We’re right back where we started.

Citron: We are merry-ing the go-round~.

Tsuzuru: I wish we were doing whatever that is, but unfortunately, we’re just going in circles.

Sakuya: I’ve… actually been thinking about that.

Sakuya: The other day, I got a request to play a role that’s bigger than the ones I usually do.

Sakuya: But it’s a regional performance, so I’d have to leave the dorms for a while…

Sakuya: I was gonna turn it down because it’s such an important time with focusing on the Fleur Award and all, and I was worried about my ability to handle both things.

Sakuya: --Until now, that is.

Sakuya: After talking to Towa-kun and Tenma-kun, I remembered how I was back during our debut.

Sakuya: Back then, I had just opened the door to the new world of theater, and there was a lot that I didn’t understand.

Sakuya: I was surprised by everything I saw, everything I felt. I was frantic and all over the place.

Sakuya: But I think I had more courage and bravery to try new things back then than I do now.

Sakuya: I’ve come to understand lots of things. Like how to tell what’s necessary and what isn’t for theater, what’s important to me and what isn’t…

Sakuya: But I think because I’m being made to make choices, I feel like I’m not able to open new doors that I would’ve challenged myself to open back then.

Tsuzuru: I get what you mean, being completely absorbed in seizing the chances you’re given, never thinking about the consequences of your actions… I guess I used to kinda be like that.

Tsuzuru: Not like there were that many chances to begin with.

Citron: It is because you have nothing that you feel like you can do anything, correct?

Chikage: Like a first performance, huh…

Itaru: For us, it’s our debut performance, but for you, it’s Oz, right, Senpai?

Chikage: Exactly. Being able to have something to devote myself to other than work certainly felt like having a new door opened for me.

Sakuya: The place where I belong will forever be MANKAI Company. And I’ll always have my Spring Troupe family to support me no matter what.

Sakuya: It’s because I have a place to belong like this that I’m able to set out on my own and step out into new worlds, and I think that makes taking the leap worth it.

Sakuya: I feel like there are parts of me that always end up being spoiled when I’m with you guys, so I want to set out from the troupe for a bit and try to do my best in a whole new place on my own.

Sakuya: And I want to grow as an actor as much as possible and bring something back home with me.

Sakuya: I don’t want to lose to my past self when it comes to that reckless urge to take on new challenges.

Sakuya: …Do you guys think I’m aiming for the wrong thing?

Tsuzuru: --Nah, I think you’re doing great.

Tsuzuru: I think I’m gonna try and participate in that scriptwriting training camp that I was gonna give up on for the sake of the performance…

Tsuzuru: Maybe I’ll even get some kinda hint on what I’ve been struggling with on the script. And it’s not good to forget about the desire to try new things, y’know?

Masumi: …Then I’m going to try and do that internship. I want to learn more about promotion so I can be useful to the Director.

Citron: Then… I shall participate in the arts festival I have been on the fence about.

Citron: If you are hesitating about something, that means there is a part of you that wants to do it. It is important to be honest with yourself about your feelings!

Chikage: Your own feelings, huh…

Itaru: …What are you going to do, Senpai?

Chikage: Shouldn’t I be asking you that? Weren’t you approached about something important at work?

Itaru: Compared to the rest of you guys, mine’s like the furthest away from actual theater.

Sakuya: Still, if it’s something you care about and are excited about, I think you should do it, Itaru-san.

Masumi: You initially joined the troupe for something entirely unrelated.

Tsuzuru: That something being two free meals made it easier for you to spend money on games.

Itaru: I mean, you’re right, but damn…

Itaru: Actually, y’know what, I don’t like being called out like that, so I’m gonna outperform all of you out of spite.

Itaru: You should follow your heart too, Senpai.

Chikage: …Well, I suppose I’ll try and see if I can come up with a challenge of my own to take on.

· • —– ٠ ✤ ٠ —– • ·

Citron: And that is why we are running away from home!

Tsuzuru: Yeah, no, that’s not what this is.

Sakuya: We thought that each of us could leave the dorms and try to take on each of our challenges on our own.

Izumi: I see… It’s a little surprising to hear, but I appreciate that you made the decision after talking it over with everyone.

Izumi: Let’s do rehearsals remotely while you’re away and then really focus in on them when you all get back.

Banri: Aight, we better rearrange the rehearsal schedules with that in mind.

Izumi: We can work that out later.

Izumi: Since you guys already have your roles down way more than you usually would, rehearsals have been progressing ahead of schedule, so we should be able to bounce back from this no problem.

Sakuya: Thank you so much.

Tsuzuru: We’ll do our best.

Izumi: (Each of them taking on a new challenge, huh… Yeah, I think it’ll be a great way for them to remember how they felt during their debut performance.)

· • —– ٠ ✤ ٠ —– • ·

Chikage: …

Hisoka: …Shouldn’t you be packing? You’re running away from home with the rest of Spring Troupe, aren’t you?

Chikage: We’re not running away from home.

Chikage: I’m basically done packing already. Well, I still don’t know whether I’m even going or not.

Hisoka: You don’t want to go?

Chikage: …There’s something I’d prefer to keep my distance from.

Chikage: No, I don’t even know what it is… I’ve been away from it for so long that I don’t even know what to feel anymore.

Hisoka: …Then shouldn’t you go and figure that out?

Hisoka: Sometimes there’s things that you can’t understand or remember unless you go and look them in the eyes directly.

Hisoka: Maybe the things you’ve always been unsure about or afraid of won’t be scary anymore. You won’t know for sure unless you face them head-on.

Chikage: …I suppose.

[ ⇠ Previous Part ] • [ Next Part ⇢ ]

[wordy-little-witch]

Okay so I have been…. Thinking big thinks about Agere!Buggy I can’t really put anywhere else so don’t mind me if I just drop this here. Tw for involuntary regression and Buggy having a not so fun time being little tough.

Personally I can really easily see as Buggy being someone who you… wouldn’t necessarily pick out as being regressed when it happens, partly because his upbringing was more unusual, living on a pirate ship and all, which means what he wants and needs tend to be different from people who grew up with a relatively normal childhood on an island or similar.

Buggy gets even more of a temper when he starts to regress, flips out more, seems to be ticked off at the smallest things, but not in his usually flamboyant, constant screaming manner, but more in a way that insinuates that he’s five minutes away from completly shutting down. When he finally retreats to a place where he’s alone he will most likely wreck parts of his room in anger and frustration, before breaking down quietly sobbing, because what Buggy longs for during those times aren’t toys or games specifically. When he feels small he longs for the feeling of someone playfully ruffling his hair and telling him „It’s gonna be fine kid.“ he longs for the times someone lifted him and Shanks on their shoulders while his family their crew was celebrating till deep into the night, he misses gruff men with calloused hands teaching him how to tie a decent knot. He misses a time before he had to grow up way, way quicker than even he would have thought, a time where Roger dying seemed like a nightmare you half remember the next day thinking to yourself how you could even come up with something like that. A time where Shanks would drive him to insanity but he also was certain he would sail him to the edge of the world. And no toys and no games will ever give that back to him.

Closing this angst fest out with saying that I actually do believe he could still gain some comfort from being little if the circumstances allow it. Both Mihawk and Crocodile fill in roles that in some ways would have fit in well with the Oro Jackson back in the day.

Crocodile is a big and intimidating man, not really cruel to him anymore but it would be a stretch to call him „nice“, yet little Buggy immediately feels relaxed in his presence, maybe even more so than big Buggy. He can count on Crocodile to protect him, even if he’s scolding the clown for being a pain in the ass, he doesn’t have to worry about anyone when he’s with Crocodile, strong, smart, wise Crocodile, who always seems to hug him just a bit closer when he feels small, even if he tries to play it off as casual pda towards his lover when they are in public.

The same goes for Mihawk, who’s imposing in a different way, but who has a natural knack at finding out what Buggy needs. Who can snark „Your bad mood is intolerable. You should lay down until you cooled off.“ and Buggy can whine and moan all he wants about that, his big side even haughtily proclaiming he doesn’t need to listen to Mihawk seriously assign him „Nap time“, but who more often than not find himself waking up next to Mihawk on their fancy couch, the swordsman reading a book next to him and seemingly paying no attention to him, but also Buggy doesn’t remember that he laid down with a blanket when he first slinked up next to Mihawk in the first place.

And if there was ever any room for a happy ending including Shanks, their crews would definetly see them emerge from the woods of an island they have just docked at, late in the evening. Both of their captains bantering and laughing, carrying a bucket of fish they just caught. They both look like messes, full of dirt and apperantly fruit juices, and Shanks just laughs when Yasopp asks what on earth they where doing. „We found some blackberry bushes and had a blackberry fight.“ neither of their crews fully get it but they do notice that their captains seem lighter after those days.

Jesus christ on a motorbike YES YESYES GIMME ALL YOUR THOUGHTS I will hoard them like a dragon I SwEaR!!!!!

Buggy would absolutely have really hyperspecific needs that he can't articulate or even fully grasp, big OR little.

Like.

The bit with Crocodile?? That makes him teeter more than most things. Big, Warm, Calloused Hands make him melt in every way imaginable but when Croc pats his head or gives him a squeeze, part of him just unfurls a teeny tiny little bit.

Mihawk just showing his care casually and quietly is always a good tale, especially with "assigning nap time" and the casual little blanket bit, just aaaaAAAA♡♡♡♡

And the TEMPER tes, Buggy has negative emotional regulation skills, but regressed?? That threshold just EVAPORATES. He'll slip sway, rage, and shatter alone because solitude is the safest thing to him. Maybe a few HIGHLY trusted people know, but... honestly, I think it'd be wild if Cabaji and Mohji knew, but once the Impel Down Thing happened and they went with Alvida as a captain, it fundamentally Altered Buggy's trust in them. Like. On the one hand, absolutely survival, he gets it, but on the other hand that's his crew, his people, and it stings ((and reminds him of another crew, one he trusted with his heart and soul and safety, who left him in pieces, bloodied and hunted because his father was killed and nobody was enough of an adult to help the literal children in their care)).

Also:

Buggy having weird little things he associates with childhood and the sensation there, it all being unusual to most is absolutely true 110%, no 1000000%. Learning knots just AAAAAAA Buggy regressing and his favorite toy being a rope kinda kills me /pos AND /neg.

Just. Imagine fir a minute all these small things culminating up until Crocodile and Mihawk get faced with smth mundane and typical like a stuffed animal or a certain toy, and Buggy just.... doesn't understand. He doesn't even recognize it. He's not entirely sure what the heck this thing is even meant for. Crocodile bought it, bc he's the type to spoil people, and Mihawk helped pick it out bc it was a generic thing, but there's zero recognition. And that hurts.

They knew Buggy's regression went hand in hand with the traumas and experiences he had, but this... it just slots all these pieces together in both men's heads that this honestly happened. Buggy was hurt as a child; an innocent child was stained in fear and blood and grief.

As for Shanks, I can see Buggy and him being aware of the stints where Buggy goes NUCLEAR even as a child, and them having a tentative system set up because they were Red and Blue, Shanks and Buggy, the literal embodiments of Ride Or Die. They are a package deal, Do Not Separate. So when it was just them after Roger disbanded the crew, they already had a solid basis. Roger helped somewhat, but nearing the end, he was sicker. They began pulling back, trying to let him rest as much as they could. So on their own, not much changed.

I'm also incredibly soft for the Shanks-And-Buggy-Never-Really-Separated concept ((#Thanks-Stereden)) so just. Them having frequent calls over Denden, safe and protected from prying ears, where Buggy was Big, Little, In Between and Shanks delighting in it all.

The day they all meet up, crews mingling, they go into the woods to look for a treasure maybe, and Buggy is always the safest with Shanks, can actually let loose a little more, can just BE. And one thing leads to another and they find the blackberries and Buggy drops because who else can he trust but his Red? His Red who is so very vulnerable, looking off to the treeline... they come back a mess, tired but happy, and Buggy's still not quite Big but not fully Small, but he's comfortable, he's happy, and he's very very excited to drag Red over to Hawky and Croccy because the got SO many fishes and berries and it isn't beri, but they're still good-!!

Ough I'm feral, shaking the bars of my cage THANK YOU ILYSM this ask made my dayyyyy ♡♡♡♡♡♡

[acesofspadess]

Extended Play

You were very surprised when Niall asked you to come with him to Calabasses. You knew he was filming today and didn’t know how important it had become to him that you were there.

The drive up wasn’t long, but it was early and you were still drinking your tea. Niall had asked for you to pack him different outfits and a couple for yourself for when it gets cold or you guys went out somewhere. Early into the drive Niall got a call from Joe.

“Hey man, Emily, she said she’s sick and can’t make it.” were the first words that were said. Emily played a key role, guitar, violin, and vocals. You and her had bonded over the instruments you both knew how to play. You tuned out of the conversation in your thoughts till Niall was squeezing your thigh. “How does that sound?” he asked with a hopeful grin. “I'm sorry, how does what sound?” you heard Joe chuckle through the car speaker and Niall giggled. “Can you play Emily's part?”

“I'm sorry what?” it wasn’t that you didn’t want to or that you didn’t know how to play it, you wanted to and did know, but what would everyone say. “I- Niall, Joe? What would that look like?” Niall seemed to know immediately what you meant. “It doesn’t matter. Everyone that matters knows you aren’t using me, we asked you because we want you to." Joe hummed through the speaker, “if it helps, it was Emily’s idea. We wouldn’t ever put you in that position.”

You sighed, taking a deep breath before smiling. “Fine, fine, if you guys want me so bad.” they both cheered with a laugh and you joined them. “Okay the other violinists have an extra so you can use theirs and everything else we can discuss when you guys get here. Maia, thank you so much.” you shrugged it off with a ‘no worries’  before Niall hung up and at the very next stop he leaned over the console and kissed you hard. “You're an angel, baby girl.” he kissed you again quickly before driving again and you were still in a daze. Kissing him would never fail to amaze you. “I think I'm gonna need that on a mug.” you joked lifting yours up knowing you were really going to need it.

Click to play 

“I probably won't be able to play it. This the- this is the piano isn’t it?”

“Yeah it is.”

As the gentle keys of the piano were heard Niall was shown playing it, or at least attempting to. His face was one of concentration until John started playing the harmonica and he chuckled.

I think this is my best cohesive work.

“It's been… 18 months in the making, if not longer.” Niall spoke into the camera. 

And i feel like this is… the album from where- for where i’m at now, and for where a lot of people are in the world, um, 

“and hopefully people grab hold of it, make it their own and then…” he was staring off into the landscape of the property getting lost in it as he spoke, “we get the opportunity to take it around the world.”

As you sat a few spaces away from the piano Niall was currently at, you marvelled at the etherealness of it all. The 11 am sun brought a proper glow over the room. It was just Niall and the piano at the start. 

Life is like a board game some of the time

Mistakes and heartbreaks are no crime

But there's a light creepin' through under broken skies

Got plans? Better hurry 'cause time flies

It was then, you and the other violinists started playing each of your additions. You were closest to him and very focused on the sheet music in front of you. 

Hold tight, get ready for the ride

If everythin' was easy, nothing ever broke

If everythin' was simple, how would we know?

How to fix your tears, how to fake a show

How to paint a smile, yeah, how would we know?

How good we have it though? Mm

Niall was properly lost in his music and you loved it

Life is like a dance floor some of the time

(Life is like a dance floor some of the time, mm)

Dancin' with the stars, oh, every night

And gravity comes and wraps her arms around you again

It's all fun and games until the party ends

Hold tight, get ready for the ride

You didn’t have vocals in this as you were the main violin and you were happy you got to play the majestic instrument.

If everythin' was easy, nothing ever broke

If everythin' was simple, how would we know?

How to fix your tears, how to fake a show

How to paint a smile, yeah, how would we know?

How good we have it though?

Looking at the sun our whole lives

We're blinded by the (lights)

Looking at the sun our whole lives

We're blinded by the lights, ooh

We're still not ready for the ride

If everythin' was easy, nothing ever broke

If everythin' was simple, how would we know?

How to fix your tears, how to fake a show

How to paint a smile, yeah, how would we know?

Oh, if everything was easy, nothing ever broke

If everything was simple, how would we know?

How to fix your tears, how to fake a show

How to paint a smile, yeah, how would we know?

How good we had it though?

How good we had it though?

So hold tight, get ready for the ride

‘The Show’ played on the speakers as he spoke

I wrote ‘The Show’ with Jamie Scott in London. I was, like, we should, um… 

He was seen walking around outside before the camera cut to him sitting

“See if Joe Little would like to get involved in this. I know he’s in New Zealand. Maybe he’ll have some spare time.” Niall laughed looking over to where Joe was sitting in front of him. 

They continued talking about the writing experience of ‘Meltdown’ and how it used to sound. It was very different from the one he finalised. The 5pm evening sun required lights around the room, but it was very sunny.

Niall walked down the stairs as you started to play the beginning notes on your own guitar. You were situated by the glass doors and the sun against your brown skin made you glow. You had vocals in this song and the mic stand was adjusted perfectly for you to sing and play.

Talkin' to yourself in the bathroom

Losin' your mind in the mirror like you have to

Ooh

Screamin' in your car in the driveway 

Spinnin' out think your life's going sideways 

Ooh

You sang the chorus lowly just to add onto Nialls angelic voice

One broken glass turns to total collapse 

Just know this too shall pass

I'm tellin' you now, tellin' you now

Woo

When it all melts down I'll be there 

Woo, woo

When it all melts down I'll be there 

I'm tellin' you now, tellin' you now

You and Niall both stopped playing for the next two lines letting his voice ring through

Sleep is so thin, outta habit

Hard to tell the real from the dreams you imagine

Ooh 

Nights when one broken glass turns to total collapse 

Just know this too shall pass

I'm tellin' you now, tellin' you now

Woo

When it all melts down I'll be there 

When it all melts down (woo) 

When it all melts down now (woo) 

When it all melts down I'll be there 

I'm tellin' you now, tellin' you now

When there's wolves on your track  (wolves on your track) 

Catchin' up fast  (catchin' up fast)

Baby, don't you look back  (don't you look back)

Don't you look back  (baby, don't you look back)

When you're hittin' a wall  (hittin' a wall)

And every star falls  (every star falls)

Don't you worry at all

Woo

When it all melts down I'll be there 

When it all melts down (woo) 

Niall smiled at being able to hear your voice stand out through the vocals

When it all melts down now (woo)

When it all melts down I'll be there 

He looked in your direction to check up on you. The sun was hot as you stood in front of the glass in denim

I'm tellin' you now, tellin' you now

Woo

When it all melts down I'll be there 

When it all melts down 

When it all melts down now (woo)

When it all melts down I'll be there 

I'm tellin' you now, tellin' you now

He finalised the closing with a final strum of the guitar and immediately looking your way with a smile.

Definitely didn’t realise how formative… 25 to 30 would be in love and life. It made me think on a larger scale. 

“I think we kind of lost…” he scratched his head as he thought, “a spot of that control that we like to have as humans. 

We as people always have moments of freak out and not knowing what happens next, and the unknown scares people. 

“I remember I was playing- I was sat in this chair, this was on the 15th of june 2022. It was just after we got back from Joshua tree. And Julian came into town. You remember?” as he got the agreement from the other men a body in the back was blurry.

“And i have this title is ‘all i am. Thats the title of this voice note.” As the figure became clear they handed him a water bottle and smiled up at them. “Thank you love.” you smiled back down at him and as you began to walk away he laced your finger with his bringing a kiss to your lips before pulling you around to sit on his lap with him. He pressed play and the well known tune of a now different title played. You all sat and listened to the past Niall mumble the tune. You all started to hum along to it as Niall looked up at you with a smile.

“That little spanish number.” he remembered reaching to grab the guitar carefully so as to not throw you off of his lap. You didn't know how he played with his arms wrapped around you but he did, and you couldn’t help but be turned on. 

“So we obviously- we wrote the song in like an hour.” Joel added to the conversation as you looked up at the new information. “Like, this was a great, like, collaboration. It was like we were all writing it together in like an hour, it was written. It was easy for us because you would not shut up about Miss Quinn, here.” you looked back down at Niall who was already looking up at you with doe eyes filled with admiration. You wrapped your hand around his jaw, grazing it softly as he smiled and leaned into it.   

“And I have these, like, harmonicas sitting here. And, like, as a joke. You know, I was like…” he played the harmonica goofily, “or something- I was, like, ‘let me see it’. And juts- it’s my favourite thing. Just like the one note, like, monotone, like, ignorant Bob Dylan.” Niall ‘yupped’ a few times causing you to smile at him. “No, ‘cause im sure- im sure you like- you could have-”

“I did a take and I was like-” Joel mimicked himself playing the harmonica very well in comparison to Niall’s. You all laughed because of the comparison. “And, like, this is so whack.”

“And you were like, ‘do what you would do’. And I was like, ‘I can’t play this thing’. And, uh, and you were like,” Niall switched his voice to sound like Joel, ‘but that's what makes it honest.” you all laughed at his impression as Jamie spoke up.

“Yeah, totally. It's so much cooler that- as simple as it is.” Niall nodded looking confused. “It’s literally- was it like four notes?” he now mimicked himself playing the simple notes dramatically. “Yeah it like 2 note.” Jamie laughed.

“And uh, that was like- that magic in it. Like, we had it all- Remember i was, i was ready to BV it up, and i was like, ‘No, we don't need to do that.’” he paused looking up at you before looking away to continue speaking to the boys. “I think once we’d written, ‘You Could Start A Cult’ to me, that was the end of the album.”

The 8pm sun casted a glow on Niall outside all alone on a little chair in a wheat field. You stood back behind the few crew members who were there. It was once again just him and his guitar, and the harmonica of course

Darlin', I will give up everything

Who I'll be and who I am

You can have it all

Baby, you could start a cult, you see

Anywhere you go, I'll be

Yeah you are so much more than beautiful to me

The camera followed him around in short circles adding an ethereal feeling to it all

Oh, I'll follow you 'til there's no tomorrow

I'll follow you 'til there's no tomorrow

I'll follow you 'til there's no tomorrow

I'll follow you

Swear you, you could start a war or two

Kingdoms fightin' over you

To wake up by your side is all I wanna do

Oh, I'll follow you 'til there's no tomorrow

I'll follow you 'til there's no tomorrow

I'll follow you 'til there's no tomorrow

I'll follow you

You couldn't help the tear that made there way to  your eyes as he played the harmonica

Baby, you could start a cult, you see

They will say that we're crazy

But you are so much more than beautiful to me

The crickets in the background added a beautiful feeling to the last song of the day. You were back playing violin as Niall walked through the house to the mic from outside.

Wantin' your summer skin pressed on mine

Fallin' like rain, ripplin' on by

Supermoon watch it dance in your eyes

My wildest of dreams, takin' on a new life

If it's this good way down here

Then what's it like up there high in heaven?

On a night like tonight

You would forever be amazed at his vocal range

Are we just two stars passin' by?

Wantin' your summer skin pressed on mine

Wanna know what your lovin' tastes like

On a night like tonight

Yeah

Yeah

He bounced around the room during the instrumental break and continued as he sang again

Innocent kisses, now our hearts on fire

Got me so high, walkin' on a wire, yeah

Baby, you, baby, you blow my mind

Tell me anything you like, except for goodbye

If it's this good way down here

Then what's it like up there high in heaven?

On a night like tonight 

(On a night, on a night, on a night)

Are we just two stars passin' by? 

You felt the camera on you a few times but were so focused on Niall’s voice you couldn't think about it

(Passin' by, passin' by, passin' by)

Wantin' your summer skin pressed on mine

Wanna know what your lovin' tastes like

On a night like tonight 

(On a night, on a night, on a night)

Yeah

Yeah

You felt your stomach drop in need as he moaned out both yeah’s

Wantin' your summer skin pressed on mine

Wanna know what your lovin' tastes like

Wantin' your summer skin pressed on mine

Pressed on mine, pressed on mine

Wantin' your summer skin pressed on mine

(On a night, on a night, on a night)

He ended outside and as instructed you set your violin down as you walked through the glass doors to join him outside. You wrapped your arms around his back to his front letting your head rest on his shoulder. He turned his head planting a kiss against your temple before everything went black.

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