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kydrogendragon · 6 months ago

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Lecture

Lecture for Day Five of Dreamling Week

Relationship: Dream/Hob Rating: Teen Words: 3614 Warnings: Alcohol Poisoning, Hospitalization Ao3 Link Thank you to @zzoomacroom for the beta on this fic!!

It starts with a call.

Hob’s phone buzzes against the nightstand once, twice, thrice before he startles from his slumber. Morpheus’s arm is flung across his chest, fingers digging into his sides as Hob shifts. He leans over, stretching a hand out to pick up his cellphone. Hob chuckles as Morpheus groans and nuzzles his face into his side. He picks up the phone, pressing the far too bright green button on the screen and sets the device against his ear.

“’llo?” He answers, voice gravelly with sleep.

“Hello, is this Mr. Gadling speaking?” a woman’s voice chimes in his ear. There’s background noise, people talking urgently in the distance. Hob frowns.

“This is he.”

“My name is Sarah, I’m a nurse here at St. George’s hospital. Your sons, Robyn Gadling and Orpheus Gadling just arrived here about half an hour ago.”

Hob’s stomach drops. He sits up, heart racing in his chest. One hand reaches out and snags Morpheus’s arm shakily. A million scenarios race through his mind. A car wreck? They’d just gotten their own cars, finally. Did they go for some late-night joyride? Did they sneak out and someone tried to mug them? Or worse, did one of them try to . . . he knows Orpheus had been having a hard time with school and friends lately . . . but surely he wouldn’t have tried . . . he’s been doing better, he said he was doing better? Why weren’t they home? Where did they go? Oh god, is it fatal? Are his boys alive?

There are tears streaming down his face. He’s vaguely aware of Morpheus’s voice calling to him, frantic, his husband’s hand shaking him gently, but worriedly. The nurse’s voice calls out to him. Hob blinks, the world getting clearer as the stuck tears fall. He takes in a shuttering breath.

“Fuck, sorry. Are . . . are they okay? What happened?” he manages, finally. Hob turns to Morpheus, blue pleading eyes meet his. Hob just pulls him closer, tucking his husband’s head under his chin.

“Your one son, Orpheus, is fine. He was drunk still when the ambulance arrived, but not to a degree we were concerned about. He was the one to call 999. Your other son, Robyn, had a blood alcohol content of .38 percent—” Hob’s heart stops “—He’s okay, at the moment, and we predict he’ll be fine after spending the night. It’s a good thing his brother had called us, though. Much higher and it could have been fatal.” He lets out a strangled breath as he holds Morpheus tight. He can feel his husband’s arms wrapped around him equally tight. Hob bets he could hear the nurse from how close they are.

He clears his throat before talking. “Okay . . . okay, thank you. Thank you for calling. We’ll be down there immediately.” Hob hears the nurse say something—probably a farewell of some sort—as he lets his cellphone slip from his hand onto the bed. They both stay there for a moment, Hob’s heart still racing in his chest.

“Hob?” Morpheus’s voice says quietly in the silence of their bedroom. “Would you like me to drive there?”

And it’s then that his brain decides it can’t hold back tears anymore. The image of his son, of his Robyn, lying in a hospital bed, not even eighteen yet, wrecks him. It’s worse knowing just how close it could have been to him lying in a mortuary drawer instead. And Hob would have slept through it all, not knowing that his world had been destroyed. And now his husband, his wonderful, thoughtful and caring husband who hates driving with a passion, offers to drive because he knows Hob would probably get them in an accident if he’d tried to drive right now. And for some reason that just does it.

He sobs into Morpheus’s shoulder both in fear and in relief. He knows he’ll cry more once he gets there, but Orpheus will be there, no doubt terrified as well, as Robyn too, once he comes to and Hob needs to be strong for his boys, so he has to cry now. He cries, body-shaking sobs, as he clings to Morpheus’s form until the tears finally dissipate and his head clears.

Hob sniffles, rubbing his nose and eyes on his arm. Morpheus’s hand finds his face, thumbs delicately wiping away what Hob missed. His husband leans forward and presses a kiss to his forehead, gentle and sweet, before sliding out of the duvet and walking to the closet to fetch them both clothes.

The drive to the hospital is a blur. Streetlights pass overhead, lighting the car with shades of golden white at random. The streets are wet. Puddles of green and red and yellow lights reflect out of them. Morpheus is behind the wheel. A duffle bag rests on Hob's lap filled with spare clothes for both of their sons along with water bottles and snacks and phone chargers and anything else they may need.

This is how they handle things, Hob’s come to realize. For most days, when life is simply life, Hob relishes in the minutia of it all, of being prepared and making sure things are going where they need to go and doing what they need to do. It’s a reason he enjoys teaching. The quizzes and tests provide an easy sense of accomplishment with checkmarks and rubrics and set results. Morpheus, usually, works on a more whimsical flow with little structure and whims that easily change to fit what he needs in the moment. Oddly enough, it works well between them. And, it seems, when things like this happen and the worry and stress are too much, all the systems Hob’s build for himself, all routines and structures fall away and he’s left floating like a leaf in the wind.

Had it just been him, had Morpheus not been here, he would have gotten to the hospital, one way or another, but his mind would have been left behind. He’d have been frantic, cut loose, running off emotion and stress. Probably would have turned up without a shirt and still in nothing but his boxers. But Morpheus becomes his structure. He becomes a ship in the ocean that he can cling to against the unpredictable rapids. And his husband navigates it with ease, following steps that in hindsight are obvious, but were previously hidden to Hob.

He does not know how he would survive without him.

They must have parked at some point and Morpheus must have wrangled him from the car because he’s currently staring at his husband’s back, the gray duffle bag slung over his shoulder as he guides Hob by hand down the far too bright hallways of the hospital. The air in the white corridors is chilled and despite the fact that it’s two in the morning (he thinks, at least that was when the call came in), the place is alight with people—mainly nurses. Morpheus stops in front of a room and turns to Hob, tears held firmly in, but still glossed over the surface of his eyes.

Fuck. Hob’s heart sinks. He’s been so lost in his own head he hadn’t even asked Morpheus if he was okay. Hob gives his hand a squeeze and musters up something close to a smile while he can because he knows he’s gonna lose it again once they step foot inside this room and he sees Robyn.

“Are you ready?” Morpheus asks him, eyes trailing over him. Hob takes a deep breath in, holds it, then releases it. He does that once more—advice Morpheus had given him after they’d taken Orpheus to the A&E when he’d bumped his head on the school playset pretty badly and Hob proceeded to freak out. Then Hob nods. And Morpheus is opening the door and leading them both in.

The first thing Hob hears upon entering the room is Orpheus’s raw voice calling for them both. The second is the steady beeping of the heart monitor attached to Robyn. The third is his own voice breaking as he steps closer to the hospital bed.

He stumbles over, feet moving on autopilot, as he collapses at the side of the sturdy bedframe. Robyn’s eyes are shut. There’s an oxygen tube running to his nose and an iv dripping into his arm. His skin shines with sweat, his hair damp, but he’s breathing. And his eyes flutter under his eyelids. And all Hob can feel is the rush of relief as he reaches out and holds his boy’s hand between his own.

Hob rests his head against their clasped hands, head tilted to stare up at his baby boy. There’s anger, brewing beneath all the pain and worry and fear, and Hob knows he’ll need to step away to get the worst of it out before he talks to his sons, but for now, he lets himself float here, in-between emotions where all he needs is his son’s pulse under the tips of his fingers, and to watch the steady rise and fall of his chest.

***

“Dad?” Orpheus says, voice hoarse from tears and disuse. His wide eyes follow Hob as his husband collapses beside Robyn’s form. Morpheus’s heart clenches in his chest at the sight, feeling helpless. This is not how either of them saw this night going.

He walks over, kneeling beside Orpheus who sits on one of the hospital room’s chairs. Morpheus takes his son’s hands in his own and speaks. “Orpheus, let us give your dad a moment with Robyn and get you into a fresh set of clothes.” His eyes fall down to the soiled shirt Orpheus wears, smelling of cheap liquor and wet from the rain. His son nods, eyes still glued to where the rest of their family rests, but allows Morpheus to gently guide him up and outside of the room.

They walk in silence for a moment, wandering down the brightly lit hallways until they reach a free bathroom. At this late hour, it’s empty. He closes the door behind them with a quiet sigh before setting the duffel bag onto the sink counter. Orpheus stands, watching with a blank expression that Morpheus catches in the mirror, as he fishes out the set of clothes he’d grabbed for him along with the old grocery bag for Orpheus’s old clothes.

He turns, handing the stack over to his son. Orpheus takes them and quietly locks one of the larger stalls behind him. It’s now, while his husband is away and Orpheus is busy, that Morpheus allows himself a small moment to breathe. He grips the counter with his hands and sags against it, chin to his chest. He cannot cry yet, there is still much to be done, but he allows himself a handful of ragged, gasping breaths, silenced only by the noise of the bathroom fan.

The stall unlocks and Orpheus emerges, eyes red from tears. He walks up, bag in hand and sets it on the counter. Morpheus pulls his son tight against his chest and loses the battle as Orpheus sobs against him. Tears fall down his face. He presses his nose into the top of his son’s head and thanks whatever god is listening that the two of them, despite it all, are safe and alive.

They both stay there, Morpheus rubbing his son’s back, whispering gentle words to him, allowing the tears to fall freely between them both. Time passes until he hears a snot-filled sniff against his chest and he feels Orpheus step back and out of his hold. He lets his arms fall, raising one to wipe his own face clean.

“I’m so sorry, father, I—It wasn’t supposed to be like this. I don’t know how it happened, I swear—”

“It’s okay,” Morpheus says, cradling his son’s face in his hands. “It is okay. Breathe.” Orpheus takes a shuddering breath in as he nods. Morpheus sighs as he leans forward and presses a kiss to his son’s forehead.

“You called for help. You got your brother here in time. I am so proud of you for that,” he whispers against Orpheus’s skin. “We will have a further conversation about this, but for now, all I need to know is this: are you okay?”

Orpheus nods, tears welling up in his eyes once again.

“Good. And are those that you were with okay?”

He sniffs, but nods once more. “After Robyn . . . after he passed out, the others got freaked out, so they either stopped drinking or went back home.”

“Good. That is. Good.” Morpheus prays that no other parents need deal with what they are currently experiencing, but he trusts his son’s judgment. Whatever alcohol was in his system, Orpheus seems level-headed now. He takes a breath. The details of the night are less important at the moment. They all will have a lengthy conversation about this later. The main priority now, however, is ensuring that both of his sons are okay, physically as well as mentally.

He wraps his arms around Orpheus once more, giving him a firm squeeze. “Come. Let us check back on your dad.”

***

Hob sits on the edge of Robyn’s bed when Morpheus and Orpheus return. He turns, eyes raw from tears. He gathers a weak smile onto his face to greet them as they close the door behind them. Orpheus steps forward, but stops, wrapping his arms around himself instead. Hob’s smile falls. He can only imagine how Orpheus is taking all this (now that his brain has come back online to some degree and allows him thought beyond being able to see and feel Robyn). He lifts his arms, spreading them out and Orpheus comes running.

He wraps his arms around his other son, gently rocking him as he holds him close. Orpheus doesn’t cry, not much at least, though Hob suspects he had plenty of time to do so with Morpheus already. He simply sniffles here and there and clings close. Hob meets his husband’s eyes over Orpheus’s shoulder. The room is filled with red eyes and somber tones, the sound of Robyn’s stable and persistent heart-beat and the sniffling noses the only noise.

It’s a few hours later when Robyn opens his eyes. Orpheus lies flat on the bench seating along the window, a thin hospital blanket draped over him. He rests on a pillow Morpheus pulled from his duffel bag—Hob jokingly called him Mary Poppins after pulling that thing out. They sit in chairs dragged closer to the bed, simply watching, Hob’s hand in Morpheus’s.

Hob’s heart skips a beat when brown eyes meet his at 5:09 in the morning. Robyn groans as his eyes flutter open. He stares up at the ceiling, blinking slowly, before gazing around the room. His brows are furrowed and he winces as he moves his head. Then, his son’s eyes find his. They widen, flitting back and forth between him and Morpheus.

“Dad? Father? What—”

Hob jumps out of his chair and is leaning over the bed to wrap his son in a hug (still mindful of any soreness he may have) and prides himself on not immediately breaking down. He hears the creak of the mattress behind him as Morpheus, he assumes, sits on the edge of the bed.

“I’m so happy you’re alive,” Hob whispers into Robyn’s hair, peppering kisses to the top of it as he speaks. “Christ, I’m so happy. I was so worried. Fucking hell, Robyn, never scare me like that again!”

“I didn’t mean to,” Robyn says into Hob’s shirt. He leans back—no longer nearly smothering his son—and sits on the edge closest to him instead. He reaches out and cups Robyn’s cheek, thumb rubbing lightly over the oxygen tube. “Where . . . wait, am I in the hospital?”

“Yeah, yeah you are,” Hob says, glancing over to where Orpheus was laying. Their other son stirs, eyes opening sleepily from the noise. He sees Robyn and quickly sits up, eyes now wide. Hob gives Orpheus a gentle smile before turning back. “You’re lucky you had your brother with you. He’s the one that called 999.”

Robyn’s head snaps to Orpheus with anger. “You called them? What the hell!”

“Robyn!—”

“You were passed out!” Orpheus cries.

“Yeah! Like drunk people are sometimes, I didn’t need to come to the bloody hospital for it!”

“You weren’t responding, I was worried—”

“I thought you had my back!”

“I do!”

“Come on now, boys,” Hob says, looking between the two of them.

“No, you just wanted to get me in trouble with Dad and Father cause you were mad that Eurydice was talking to me the whole night and not you—”

“That is not true!”

“Boys, just stop it!” Hob cries, pushing Robyn back against the bed from where he’d angled himself up to fight with Orpheus.

“It is and you know it! You were jealous that the one person you came to the party for liked me more than you so you wanted to get me in trouble with our dads and so you could look like a hero to Eurydice!”

“Robyn . . .”

“I never should have invited you—”

“Enough.” Morpheus’s voice echoes in the room. Hob turns to see his husband standing in the center of the room, jaw tense, as he slowly looks from Orpheus to Robyn. Hob knows his husband has looks that can kill, but this stare is on another level. Maybe it’s the early morning sun barely peeking through the window, maybe it’s the dimmed hospital lights, but the shadows over his face make him look downright nightmarish.

The boys silence themselves, both looking away from anyone. Orpheus, more hurt than anything. Robyn, still pouting in anger. Hob sighs and slumps back down in the chair. The relief he’d felt seeing Robyn looking around quickly fades into frustration and anger, especially after that fight. He rests his head in his hands and takes a moment to breathe before he starts yelling in return.

“Robyn,” Morpheus’s voice calls. “Your blood alcohol content was .38. Anything .4 and higher is potentially fatal. Had your brother not been there or had anyone not called for help tonight, we would be getting a phone call telling us our son was dead rather than just in the hospital.”

Hob lifts his head in time to see Robyn’s eyes widen in fear. He pales as he turns towards Morpheus. His heartbeat on the monitor jumps.

“. . . what.”

“We could have lost you.” Morpheus steps closer, circling to the other side of the bed and takes Robyn’s hands in his own. “We could have lost you,” he whispers.

Tears well in Robyn’s eyes as he turns back towards Hob and Orpheus. Hob takes a breath and nods. “It’s true, love. Tonight was a close call.”

“Oh.” Robyn visibly deflates and lets himself fall back against the pillows. Morpheus lifts a hand and runs it through his son’s hair. The tender act still sends a warm feeling through Hob’s body, despite the grim circumstances.

“You should apologize to your brother,” Hob says, voice low, the adrenaline and fear of the night now fading away. He’s exhausted, mentally and physically.

Robyn nods and turns towards Orpheus who’s still perched on the bench by the window. “I’m sorry, Orpheus. I . . .” Robyn sighs. “Thank you. For saving me. I . . . I shouldn’t have said all that.”

Orpheus looks down, hands in his lap. He fidgets with his fingers and shrugs with a single shoulder. “’s fine.”

“It’s not, though.”

Orpheus just shakes his head, turning to look back out the window instead. Hob sighs quietly. Clearly this night hasn’t just been tiring for him, but for everyone. Not that he’d ever thought otherwise, mind, but it hurts to see his sons like this. He’d been so grateful at how close they’d been when he and Morpheus got together. They’d truly been best friends, it was a miracle.

He stands, glancing between the two boys then turns to Morpheus who still stands beside Robyn, one hand in his own. There’s something to be said for the language that two people can create between each other. He’d always thought it was a bit of a joke when long lasting couples claimed to be able to read each other’s minds or know what the other was thinking from across the room, but after twelve years of marriage and three years of dating before then, Hob believed them.

Morpheus nods to the question on Hob’s face and turns to grab the duffel bag. He pulls out Orpheus’s old clothes and hands them to Hob before sitting back down in one of the chairs. Robyn watches them as Hob steps close and wraps an arm gently around around his son. He gives him a firm kiss to the forehead before stepping back. “It’s late. I’m gonna get Orpheus home. Your father’ll be here and we’ll be back later, I promise. That okay?”

Robyn nods. “Okay.”

Hob smiles and turns towards Orpheus who’s already standing and holds out a hand. He walks closer, his arms crossed over his chest, and Hob pulls him in for a quick side hug before guiding them towards the door. He stops briefly to give Morpheus a kiss on the cheek and whispers a quiet “thanks, love”. Then, they’re out the door. Hob glances back, looking at Robyn connected to all the tubes and wires and Morpheus beside the bed, blue eyes turned towards their son. Robyn’s words, the first words out of his mouth after waking up in the hospital, come back to mind and the anger bubbles back up. He takes a deep breath and closes the door behind them.

#dreamling week #dreamling week 2024 #dreamling #hob gadling #dream of the endless #the sandman #ky writes

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battyaboutbooksreviews · 3 months ago

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💖 Sapphic Books Coming Out August 2024

🩷 There's something especially sweet about a sapphic romance. Here are only a few of the amazing sapphic books hitting shelves in July 2024.

💖 Which ones are you adding to your TBR?

Contemporary 💖 Can’t Buy Me Love - Georgia Beers 💖 The Heart Wants - Krystina Rivers 💖 Hers for the Weekend - Helena Greer 💖 You Can’t Go Home Again - Jeanette Bears 💖 Worth the Wait - Kenna White 💖 One Summer in Miami - Amber Rose Gill 💖 The Last Woman I Kissed - Venetia Di Pierro 💖 Changing Her Tune - Amanda Kabak 💖 Chance Encounter - Renee Roman 💖 The Italy Letters - Vi Khi Nao 💖 Our Slice of Paradise - Tiana Warner 💖 Dancing With Dahlia - Julia Underwood 💖 Untethered - Shelley Thrasher 💖 Comes in Waves - Ana Hartnett 💖 Libertad - Bessie Flores Zaldívar 💖 The Avian Hourglass - Lindsey Drager 💖 Mamele - Gemma Reeves 💖 Mighty Millie Novak - Elizabeth Holden 💖 A Bánh Mì for Two - Trinity Nguyen 💖 Don’t Let It Break Your Heart - Maggie Horne 💖 Chance Encounter - Renee Roman 💖 Southern Lights - Liz Arncliffe

Paranormal/Horror 💖 The Curse - Alexandra Riley 💖 The House Where Death Lives - ed Alex Brown 💖 Full Shift - Jennifer Dugan & Kit Seaton 💖 The Dark We Know - Wen-yi Lee 💖 This Ravenous Fate - Hayley Dennings 💖 Come Out, Come Out - Natalie C. Parker

Fantasy 💖 The Crimson Crown - Heather Walter 💖 The Phoenix Keeper - S.A. MacLean 💖 Oath of Fire - K. Arsenault Rivera 💖 The Palace of Eros - Caro De Robertis 💖 Gentlest of Wild Things - Sarah Underwood 💖 Queen of Dreams - Kit Rocha 💖 The Sunforge - Sascha Stronach 💖 The Ending Fire - Saara El-Arifi 💖 Skyscraper - Gun Brooke 💖 Fyrebirds - Kate J. Armstrong 💖 The New Camelot - Robyn Schneider 💖 The Storm and the Sea Hawk - Kiran Millwood Hargrave 💖 Practical Rules for Cursed Witches - Kayla Cottingham 💖 Netherford Hall - Natania Barron 💖 The Duchess of Kokora - Nikhil Prabala 💖 Rise and Divine - Lana Harper

Historical 💖 Not for the Faint of Heart - Lex Croucher 💖 Accidental Darlings - Crystal Jeans

Mystery/Thriller 💖 Better Left Buried - Mary E. Roach 💖 A Midnight So Deadly - Wren Handman 💖 Death At Morning House - Maureen Johnson 💖 A Gravely Troubling Discovery - Hannah Hendy 💖 Verity’s Game - Jennifer Giacalone

Sci-Fi 💖 Time’s Agent - Brenda Peynado 💖 New Adventures in Space Opera - ed Jonathan Strahan

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darkpeacemusic · 4 months ago

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ℂ𝕣𝕖𝕖𝕡𝕪𝕡𝕒𝕤𝕥𝕒 ℍ𝕖𝕒𝕕𝕔𝕒𝕟𝕠𝕟𝕤: 𝔽𝕦𝕝𝕝 𝕟𝕒𝕞𝕖𝕤

Jeff the Killer - Jeffrey "Jeff" Alan Dan Woods

Homicidal Liu - Liuis "Liu" Victoria Woods

Sully - Sullivan "Sully" Akira Woods

Randy - Randall "Randy" Allen Warren

Keith - Keith Harvey Davis-Green

Troy - Troy John Green

Ben Drowned - Benjamin "Ben" Scott Lawman

Jane - Jane Todd Richardson-Vaughn

Mary - Mary Annabelle Vaughn

Ticci Toby - Tobias "Toby" Erin Rogers

Masky - Timothy "Tim" Buck Wright

Hoodie - Brian Hunter Thomas

Skully - Jay Gabriel Merrick

Kate the Chaser - Kate Eleanor Milens-Hayes

Charlie - Charles Matheson Jr.

Laughing Jack - Laughing Jack in a Box

Eyeless Jack - Jackson "Jack" Nicky Nyras

Slenderman - Simon (middle and last name unknown) (Human name prior to his experimentation/death)

Splendorman - Jim (Human name prior to his experimentation/death)

Trenderman - Beau (Human name prior to his experimentation/death)

Tenderman - Cedric (Human name prior to his experimentation/death)

Sally - Sally Maryam Dawn (formerly Williams)

Dr Smiley - Azerael Jesse Smiley

Nurse Ann - Annie "Ann" Lusen Mia

Nina - Nina Selene Hopkins

Candy Pop - Unknown

Candy Cane - Unknown

April Fools - Unknown

Jason the Toymaker - Jason Caleb Meyer

The Puppeteer - Jonathan Cole Blake

Clockwork - Natalie Priscilla Ouellette

Rouge - Heather Bridget Marshall

Wilson - Wilson Liam Marshall (neé Jones)

Zalgo - Z͠a̛'l͘ga̶t҉ot̡h

Queen Blackheart (oc) - Elizabeth Cindy Phillips (name prior to death)

Lazari - Lazari Natalie Swann

Stripes - Eloise Sarah Bellarose (name prior to her death)

Nathan - Nathan Maxwell Lux

Bloody Painter - Helen Delilah Otis

Kagekao - Unknown

Laughing Jill - Laughing Jill in a Box

Sadie - Sadie Marie Bennett

Hobo Heart - Unknown

Cat Hunter - Rodrigo Milo Ortiz

Chris the Revenant - Christine "Chris" Wendy Meyers

X-Virus - Cody Larkin Drake

Dollmaker - Erina Jezebel Kerenzalys

Frankie the Undead - Frankie Hades Asher (his real name prior to his death)

Judge Angels - Dina Angela Clark

Lifeless Lucy - Lucy Ava Jones

Lost Silver - Ethan Kin Fuji (his real name before his death)

Glitchy Red - Red (his real name remains a mystery)

Strangled Red - Steven Garrett Stoughton

Dr. Locklear - Evander Agnar Locklear

Lulu - Lucille "Lulu" Tiffany Greatfeil

Killing Kate - Katherine "Kate" Evelyn Knight

Screaming Dawn (oc) - Dawn Evelyn Woods

Will Grossman - William "Will" Gordon Grossman

Lulling Lauren - Lauren Robyn Ross (neé Evans)

CR - Carl Morton Ross

Emra - Emra Amelia Blake (neé Albridge)

Zero - Alice Marie Jackson

Slendrina - Charlotte (first name prior to death/experimentation)

Lily - Lily May Kennett

Nightmare Ally - Adeline "Ally" Ashley Abendroth

Zachary the Proxy - Zachary Julius Gibson

Oliver - Oliver Gorgon Henderson

Alex Kralie - Alexander "Alex" Joseph Kralie

Amy - Amy Callie Walters

Jessica - Jessica Ellie Locke

Seth - Seth Apollo Reid-Wilson (neé Wilson)

Sarah - Sarah Cassie Reid-Wilson (neé Ried)

Third Base - Richard "Doby" Vincent Doggers

Vailly - Vailly Suki Evans

#creepypasta headcanon #creepypasta au #creepypasta #slenderverse

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thereadingchallengechallenge · 11 months ago

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🔎 YA Under the Radar 7 🔍

I have been working on this list in the series all year 😂 it just took me that long to read a decent amount of underrated YA - but I got there in the end and I'm pretty happy with the recs on this list 🥰

there are rainbow flags next to LGBT+ rep, wheelchair symbols next to disability rep and koalas next to Australia YA simply because there's a lot of that on this particular list

so take a gander and maybe consider picking up a title or two (or ten) in 2024 to support lesser-known authors and books 😊

Take Me With You When You Go by David Levithan & Jennifer Niven 🏳️‍🌈

Margo Zimmerman Gets the Girl by Brianna R Shrum & Sara Waxelbaum 🏳️‍🌈♿️

Imogen, Obviously by Becky Albertalli 🏳️‍🌈

To Break a Covenant by Alison Ames 🏳️‍🌈

It Looks Like Us by Alison Ames 🏳️‍🌈

Scout’s Honor by Lily Anderson 🏳️‍🌈

Grace Notes by Karen Comer 🐨

The Sky Blues by Robbie Couch 🏳️‍🌈

Blood Moon by Lucy Cuthew

After Dark With Roxie Clark by Brooke Lauren Davis

Blind Spot by Robyn Dennison 🐨

Melt With You by Jennifer Dugan 🏳️‍🌈

The Lake House by Sarah Beth Durst

Where You See Yourself by Claire Forrest ♿️

What We Harvest by Ann Fraistat

All Eyes On Us by Kit Frick 🏳️‍🌈

When We Were Magic by Sarah Gailey 🏳️‍🌈

The Lightness of Hands by Jeff Garvin ♿️

Then Everything Happens at Once by M-E Girard 🏳️‍🌈♿️

The Buried by Melissa Grey 🏳️‍🌈

Because of You by Pip Harry 🐨

The Lost Girls by Sonia Hartl 🏳️‍🌈

Howl by Shaun David Hutchinson

The Weight of Blood by Tiffany D Jackson

Jay’s Gay Agenda by Jason June 🏳️‍🌈

Out of the Blue by Jason June 🏳️‍🌈

Riley Weaver Needs a Date to the Gaybutante Ball by Jason June 🏳️‍🌈

Girls Like Girls by Hayley Kiyoko 🏳️‍🌈

The Honeys by Ryan La Sala 🏳️‍🌈

Luck of the Titanic by Stacey Lee

It Will End Like This by Kyra Leigh

Extasia by Claire Legrand

Ryan and Avery by David Levithan 🏳️‍🌈

Starlings by Amanda Linsmeier 🏳️‍🌈

The Drowned Woods by Emily Lloyd-Jones

A Scatter of Light by Malinda Lo 🏳️‍🌈

We Didn’t Think It Through by Gary Lonesborough 🐨

Sadie Starr’s Guide to Starting Over by Miranda Luby 🐨

None Shall Sleep series by Ellie Marney 🐨

The Girls Are Never Gone by Sarah Glenn Marsh ♿️

Our Last Echoes by Kate Alice Marshall

These Fleeting Shadows by Kate Alice Marshall 🏳️‍🌈

The Narrow by Kate Alice Marshall 🏳️‍🌈

Dark and Deepest Red by Anna-Marie McLemore

Mask of Shadows duology by Linsey Miller 🏳️‍🌈

Sugar by Carly Nugent ♿️🐨

All Our Hidden Gifts trilogy by Caroline O’Donoghue 🏳️‍🌈

The Life and (Medieval) Times of Kit Sweetly by Jamie Pacton

Lucky Girl by Jamie Pacton

The Vermilion Emporium by Jamie Pacton

Accidental by Alex Richards

Some Kind of Animal by Mar Romasco-Moore

Luminous by Mara Rutherford

The Poison Season by Mara Rutherford

The Midnight Lie duology by Marie Rutkoski 🏳️‍🌈

Can’t Take That Away by Steven Salvatore 🏳️‍🌈

When You Call My Name by Tucker Shaw 🏳️‍🌈

If You Still Recognise Me by Cynthia So 🏳️‍🌈

Our Year of Maybe by Rachel Lynn Solomon ♿️

Breathe and Count Back From Ten by Natalia Sylvester ♿️

Cold by Mariko Tamaki 🏳️‍🌈

Outrun the Wind by Elizabeth Tammi 🏳️‍🌈

The Weight of a Soul by Elizabeth Tammi

Wild and Crooked by Leah Thomas ♿️

Violet Ghosts by Leah Thomas 🏳️‍🌈

The Comedienne’s Guide to Pride by Hayli Thomson 🏳️‍🌈🐨

The Siren, the Song and the Spy by Maggie Tokuda-Hall

Sweet and Bitter Magic by Adrienne Tooley 🏳️‍🌈

Sofi and the Bone Song by Adrienne Tooley 🏳️‍🌈

Nothing Sung and Nothing Spoken by Nita Tyndall 🏳️‍🌈♿️

The Spirit Bares Its Teeth by Andrew Joseph White 🏳️‍🌈

This Is the Way the World Ends by Jen Wilde 🏳️‍🌈♿️🐨

Where You Left Us by Rhiannon Wilde 🏳️‍🌈🐨

Two Can Play That Game by Leanne Yong🐨

Katzenjammer by Francesca Zappia

#booklr #book recs #bookblr #book recommendations #ya books #ya novels #ya fiction #trcc original #lgbt books #disabled books #loveozya

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mariacallous · 1 month ago

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youtube

"No Scrubs" (TLC) 1940s Cover by Robyn Adele ft. Sarah Krauss and Darcy Wright

#Youtube

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poem-today · 1 year ago

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A poem by Robyn Sarah

Spent Afterwards, they slept, breathing an air dense with their mingled sweats and wetnesses, essence that made their sleep heavy and pure

Afterwards they slept the sleep they share for whom the end has come, when nothing’s left for lips or eyes to tell or yet pretend

Afterwards they slept— and where they lay spent, sleep took away the sun, and pleasure went where pleasure goes when sleep turns limbs to lead

and drives its wedge between the sleepers so they wake separate and still and near the edge. Afterwards, they slept.

Robyn Sarah

#robyn sarah #canadian poetry #spent

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rainparadefromhell · 2 years ago

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How Never Have I Ever Uses Music to Hint at the Future

I’ve always loved the way music tells a story, especially in movies and tv shows. These things usually go unnoticed unless you’re a college student trying to ignore homework on a Tuesday afternoon. I have been aware that NHIE has been whispering a secret story through its soundtrack for a while now but never had time to actually compile it into one monster of a post. So I’m doing it now!

This is where I try to convince you that the show has been hinting at Devi ending up with Ben all the way since season one. There are over 100 songs in the official soundtrack and of course, I can’t go through them all so I’ll just stick with the most important moments from all three seasons and lyrics that I think encapsulate the core message of the songs.

SEASON 1

The Pilot – Introductions

Paxton’s intro song (Dancing On My Own – Robyn) makes a lot of sense for both characters. It talks about trying hard to get someone’s attention and failing at it. It is a song with a dramatic, pulsating beat that plays over Paxton’s big entrance into Devi’s class.

I'm in the corner, watching you kiss her, oh

I'm right over here, why can't you see me? Oh

I'm giving it my all, but I'm not the girl you're taking home, ooh

I keep dancing on my own (I keep dancing on my own)

Ben is introduced with a softer melody (Rubia – Juan Wauters). It is in Spanish, a language I don’t speak as well so I won’t try to translate it but I will leave you with this Pitchfork review of it written by Steven Arroyo :

“Rubia” still succeeds wonderfully on these terms, a longing love letter to someone with a memorable nose in a far-away country…

Te guardo un lugar en mi corazon

No quiero irme, chequeo hora son

Me iré pensando que

Muy pronto contigo yo estaré

There is an important moment near the end of the episode when Devi goes to talk to Paxton (and asks him to have sex with her) in which Playing Games by Anna of the North plays.

I've been playing games with your heart

Left you thinking in the dark

Just to make you feel unsure

Then I know you want me more

This whole song is very interesting to me. The singer seems to describe a situation in which she has the upper hand in a relationship.

I’ve been playing games with your heart, so I know I’ve made my mark is a lyric I think perfectly shows Devi’s desire to enter a relationship. It is not because she actually likes Paxton. In fact, she doesn’t even know him yet. I think it tells of Devi’s reasons to have a boyfriend – to make a mark not just on him but the school, and her peers as well. She wants to stop being “invisible” as to somehow regain some power over her situation in s1 (the death of Mohan) as well as distract herself from it.

Episode 2

The song Dancing on The Limit (by Prizes) plays as Devi dreams of Paxton coming into her room to have sex with her. It is the first “love song” of Devi and Paxton which I find genius since it doesn’t actually depict reality.

I'm never gonna quit it

Back in love within a minute

We're dancing on the limit

But I love the way you're making me move

It is a fantasy, something Devi feels when she imagines what would be like to be Paxton’s girlfriend.

Episode 6

In Ben’s episode we get so much more insight into who he is, and not just that shell of an obnoxious overachiever he built for himself. We also get insight into his feelings for Devi when he is having dinner with the Vishwakumars where after choosing not to “nuke her back”, he actually has a fun time with her family as the song (Call Me by Sarah Rebecca) in the background goes :

Call me angel, I could save you

I want you, I want you, I want you, I want you, I want you

At the very end of the episode when Devi Venmos Ben so that he never has to “accept food from a pedo again” another love song can be heard (Lost – Boy Harsher).

I’m the one that holds you

In the middle of the night

I'm the one that wants you

Forever til we die

Episode 7

In this episode Devi and Paxton kiss for the first time to Fire For You by the Cannons which at first seems like a really sensual song… until you actually read the lyrics.

I could've died for you

How could you not know?

I was alive with you

But you brought in the cold

Was I being lied to? Wish I never met you

Started to regret you

Episode 10

Boys Like You - Kids at Midnight

We’ve reached my favorite NHIE song. I love the synths. I love the 80s vibe. I love everything about it (No wonder why that Malibu kiss got an MTV nomination).

Certainly the most interesting thing about this song playing during this scene is right as the camera lowers on Devi’s phone, we cut to Paxton leaving a voicemail with these lyrics in the background :

She said, "Boys like that should be in second place”

Now do with that what you will but this is the most intentionally placed lyric in season 1, in my opinion.

I know it hurts right now, one day you'll realise

There's no need to hide yourself from the world

All my life I've been hiding myself

Just waiting for a boy like you

SEASON 2

Episode 8

In the scene we see Devi apologize to Ben about the cheating when the song Up All Night by The Undercover Dream Lovers starts playing. The song is seemingly about second chances and not letting someone go. I thought the theme of driving was interesting considering Malibu.

Caught up on the freeway

You test my patience all the time

Find another exit, ooh

Blocking you from mine

Episode 9

Heat Waves – Glass Animals

During Paxton and Devi’s kiss Heat Waves plays and I have to admit the song as well as the scene are amazing. However, I’ve seen this song misunderstood by Daxton fans so much, probably due to the scene trending (mostly on TikTok where people enjoy quick content without much context).

The writer of the song, David Bayley says this about what it means, mentioning another song called Your Love : “They're both definitely two of the songs that are about relationships and sort of knowing that they're doomed,"

Bayley uses the term Heat Wave to represent an illusion of a highway mirage (the air that rises off asphalt on extremely hot days making it seem like the road is wet).

So the love that the writer describes is just like the heat waves – an illusion.

Now I gotta let you go

You'll be better off in someone new

I don't wanna be alone

You know it hurts me too

You look so broken when you cry

One more and then I say goodbye

Episode 10

GOLDEN – Running ; Ben comes into the girls bathroom to try and make Devi feel better after she is rejected by Paxton. As he is saying “When are you gonna to realize that that dick doesn’t deserve you” the lyrics playing are :

But I get these feelings

That I can't explain

It’s in my veins

being the underdog all the time

Hello Pongo – Summer Love

Another love song that plays when Ben and Devi see each other at the dance.

I've been lookin,

for you my summer love

forever summer love

Sam Smith – Love Goes

This song is – do you wanna guess? Not a love song. It is a sad one.

I hope you understand that I have to send you away

You may not understand, but I know that you will one day

You're broken, I know this

And if you knew it, you would love me a whole different way

But that's how love goes, goes

I also think it’s funny how just as Devi and Paxton are about to slow dance the DJ plays a different, more upbeat song which tells us they aren’t really that compatible with each other. They just never manage to catch that love song!

I wonder if season 4 brings us a Ben and Devi slow dance…

SEASON 3

Episode 1

Josha Daniel – Dream of You ; We finally get something close to a love song for Daxton in the first scene of season 3 even though it it pretty vague and repetitive.

We are never gonna waste our time again

I can't sleep when i dream of you

Ilo Ilo – Clementine ; Devi and Paxton almost have sex

Clementine

Trying to erase you from my spotless mind

Hit fast-forward but I'm stuck in rewind

Episode 3

Afternoon Bike Ride – Before The Fall ; Devi tells Nalini she and Paxton broke up

After an autumn of ends lеd to silence

Winters cloak covered the tracks of the tyrants

Spring couldn't bring on the promise of June

With no voice to sing and nothing to bloom

I found the mention of June interesting even if it wasn’t intentional because it almost seems like an answer to Heat waves (Sometimes, all I think about is you, Late nights in the middle of June).

Mel Blue – Finding You; Ben tells Fabiola Devi broke his heart

I lost you love

You lost you too

I lost myself

I’m finding you

Episode 5

Carla Morrison – Eres tú ; Ben and Devi say goodbye to each other after their bet at the coffeehouse

(I found a translation for this one)

Today I woke up wanting to kiss you

I have a thirst to caress you

Entangle myself with you and not let you go

You're so intoxicating

It's you

Episode 10

“Because I’ll miss you. A lot.”

“Wait. There’s the stomach knots.”

Jaguar Sun – Car Keys

Oh, how you've grown

Look back now

And move on

Don't worry, about a thing

Just grab those car keys

And drive into the rain

Another song involving cars, driving… I’m starting to think all of this makes sense! Also I love how the song mentions growth because Devi did grow so much in season 3.

Prinze George – Take off

Saw you in the living room

You were wild with light and I wanted you

Tried to do the woman thing

I was eager, young and abandoning

I would force you to love me

I would force you to stay

I would force you to love me

I would stand in your way

And you can't take off without me now

After Boys Like You this has to be my favorite NHIE song. It also has an 80s vibe to it and the two songs feel very much connected in my mind. The lyrics talk about standing in a lover’s way. Preventing them from leaving you and closing that chapter of their life.

I am still in your way

This lyric that appears later in the song shows that after everything that happened to them in season 4, they are still in each other’s way. They can’t forget about each other even after actively pursuing other people.

After analyzing so many songs, I really have to give credit to the show. Most of these were chosen so carefully to fit certain moments. You can really tell the show was made with a lot of intention and love, at least soundtrack wise.

As far as proving who the main couple (endgame couple, whatever you wanna call it) in season 4 is, to me that is pretty obvious even without the support of the soundtrack. I’m very curious about the songs we’ll get to hear in the new season and I also wonder if we will hear some old ones again.

Let me know what you think!

#never have i ever #never have i ever netflix #never have i ever season 4 #nhie #nhie s4 #nhie netflix #ben gross #devi vishwakumar #benvi #ben x devi #music analysis

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