#robin hobb you were SICK for this

[blueberripancake]

Thinking about how nobody bothered to give Fitz a name until Patience. Thinking about how Patience gave him the name she wanted to give her son. Thinking about how Fitz immediately thought of Burrich, the amount of thought he puts into naming dogs. Thinking about how Burrich refused to name the boy he was raising.

[matthewmoorwood]

The cycle of abuse that all the Farseers go though oh I'm ILL.

horrific of Robin Hobb to make me suffer through the agony of Fitz's childhood of trauma and pain and then show me Fitz trying to help Dutiful navigate HIS trauma and pain. Fucking fuck.

Both of them had their first Wit bond be one of the worst things to ever happen to them.

Nothing breaks my heart like how much the cat earnestly loves Dutiful like she just wants to hunt and get her fur brushed :C

It's so sick how ultimately Nighteyes and the cat are so similar because Fitz and Duitiful are so similar, both of them want equally to be beasts and also be loved yet because of who they're bonded to they are forced into a life in which that can never be possible.

I'm so sick and ill and dying and suffering over these characters MAAAN.

Fitz is going THROUGH it watching Duitiful be abused for the singlular crime of being uneducated. If anyone actually cared about the fucking Farseer children beyond what they can do for the Six Duchies then they would've stoppped pretending like the entire bloodline isn't drenched in Skill and Wit like GUYS.

Time and time again we're shown that neglecting these truths leads to so much harm and yet everyone is like "haha what if it continued anyway"

Regal, Chade, and Verity you will ANSWER for your fucking crimes >:C

RAAH.

It's not even Fitz's fault that he wasn't a 'good dad' because my guy was literally sexually assaulted into having a son. Like fuck dude. I wouldn't want to live my life in Buckkeep trauma town either! Even if I wasn't fake killed!

Also horrible that Beloved who thinks he's to blame for everything that Fitz has ever been through is so content to die for the small reason that it MIGHT make Nighteyes live a little longer and thus mean he hurts Fitz a little less is SICK AND TWISTED.

Fuck you Peladine all my homies fucking hate Peladine.

OH YOU FUCKING FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCKING FUCK

I KNEW I KNEW I KNEW THAT THE DOMESTIC FUCKING FITZ AND NIGHTEYES FUCKING MOTHER FUCKING SCENES WERE BECAUSE OF THIS SHIT HAVE THEY NOT BEEN THROUGH ENOUGH????

HAVE THEY NOT SUFFERED ENOUGH??? BROTHER!!!!!!

Also. Bro. Starling. I thought u were chill. Like not chill to lie to Fitz that was fucked but now. Ugh. I'm so exhausted I just. Ugh. I literally need to have a big sleep and probably a cry to process this fucking book.

I swear to god I'm gonna rip all my hair out. Like Fitz CANT tell my guy Duitiful who he is, but at the same time its gonna be shitshow when he finds out.

I'm actually so fucking diseased.

Though I will say it is a balm for the soul watching Duitiful try to interact with Fitz his weird fake magic dad and Fitz's equally weird nobleman husband. He's probably like Dang, two father figures for the price of one.

I don't even. What I do. I just need a a sleep.

[creatureofsunandsky]

I trusted none of them with the Fool but carried him myself to the sled, loaded him, and clambered up afterward to sit beside him.

--

I saw her swallow. “As an apprentice, the first cleaning of an injured man is one of my tasks.”

“As his friend, it’s my task. Please.”

--

I rose and before he could touch the Fool, I took the rags and medicine from him. “I’ll do it,” I told him.

--

Another, saner part of me was saying softly, “Fool. Fool, it’s all right. You are here with me now, and they cannot hurt you anymore. You are safe here. Oh, Fool. You are safe. Beloved.”

--

Feared that it would alarm him to be touched and feared even more that it would draw me tighter into his misery and wake my own. But at last I took the three steps that carried me around the table. “Fool. You are safe here. I know you can’t believe it just yet, but it’s over. And you are safe.” I stroked the broken hair on his head, rough as the coat of a sick dog, and then pulled him closer to cradle his head against my sternum. His clawlike hands came up and clutched my wrist, and he held himself tighter against me. I let him have his tears. They were the only things I could give him then.

--

He rose and groped his way around the end of the table to where I sat. His hands felt for me, found a shoulder, the side of my face, and then fluttered up to my head and the crown there. He lifted it slightly, and then, with no self-consciousness at all, measured the length of my hair. He walked his fingers down my face, touching the break in my nose, the old scar, the scruff of beard on my chin. If anyone else had done it, it would have felt invasive. Insulting. But I knew he was comparing what I looked like now with what he recalled.

He cleared his throat once more and after a pause he added, “You’re a handsome man still, Fitz. Not as pretty as before Regal broke your face. But you’ve aged well, I judge.”

--

"But what matters, as I started to say, is that I want you to feel safe. So tell me. What can I do to make you feel safe?”

His grip on the knife loosened. “You aren’t irritated with me? Annoyed at my weakness?”

I was startled. “Of course not!”

“You went away so abruptly. When you didn’t come to tell me yourself, I thought … I thought you had wearied of having me depend on you for everything.”

“What would make you feel safer?”

“You do. Being here.”

--

Fool's Assassin/Fool's Quest Robin Hobb

[chloristoflora]

"I dreamed of you once," I said suddenly. I had not been planning to say the words.

He opened one catyellow eye. "I think we had this conversation before. A long time ago."

"No. This is different. I didn't know it was you until just now. Or maybe I did." It had been a restless night, years ago, and when I awakened the dream had clung to my mind like pitch on my hands. I had known it was significant, and yet the snatch of what I had seen had made so little sense, I could not grasp its significance. "I didn't know you had gone golden, you see. But now, when you leaned back with your eyes closed ... You or someone were lying on a rough wooden floor. Your eyes were closed; you were sick or injured. A man leaned over you. I felt he wanted to hurt you. So I . . ."

I had repelled at him, using the Wit in a way I had not for years. A rough thrust of animal presence to shove him away, to express dominance of him in a way he could not understand, yet hated. The hatred was proportionate to his fear. The Fool was silent, waiting for me.

"I pushed him away from you. He was angry, hating you, wanting to hurt you. But I pressed on his mind that he had to go and fetch help for you. He had to tell someone that you needed help. He resented what I did to him, but he had to obey me."

"Because you Skillburned it into him," the Fool said quietly.

"Perhaps," I admitted unwillingly. Certainly the next day had been one long torment of headache and Skillhunger. The thought made me uneasy. I had been telling myself that I could not Skill that way. Certain other dreams stirred uneasily in my memory. I pushed them down again. No, I promised myself. They were not the same.

"It was the deck of a ship," he said quietly. "And it's quite likely you saved my life." He took a breath. "I thought something like that might have happened. It never made sense to me that he didn't get rid of me when he could have. Sometimes, when I was most alone, I mocked myself that I could cling to such a hope. That I could believe I was so important to anyone that he would travel in his dreams to protect me."

"You should have known better than that," I said quietly.

Fool's Errand, by Robin Hobb (Tawny Man Trilogy #1)

[anarcoqueer1994]

Steddie brain rot with some anti Tommy

So maybe I'm rewatching the original US QAF and maybe I'm thinking about that scene with Justin and Chris Hobbs on Liberty Ave.

Hawkins gay scene in the mid-1980s was nothing to write home about, but if you knew where to look, it was there. It was a block of their own, where the businesses were supportive, and the houses were all owned by the queers. Many people saw it as the bad part of the town, but for those who knew, it was a sanctuary. There had an unspoken agreement, they don't out anyone who doesn't want to be outed. There in thier space everyone was free to be themselves.

There was of course, the Hideout, a little dive bar who's clientele was definitely not straight. There was a convenient store next to it who's workers didn't think twice when two guys would come stumbling in, arms wrapped around each other, looking for condoms. In fact they hung information posters up, reminding people that condoms and safe sax wasn't just to prevent pregnancy. They were advocating for themselves, each other when the local government(or national) had failed to do so. There was a little shop, advertising 18+ that sold things that would have Regan yuppies and the moral majority raising thier nose and clutching thier pearls. But it was a place that accepted the queer community.

Finally, there was Diane's diner across from there, a 24 hour restaurant that has been a place of solace for the folks that usually have to hide. It's also a place where the local AIDs coalition meets to coordinate meal delivery for those in Hawkins and the surrounding small towns who cannot leave thier house, too sick. Many of them don't even have family of thier own to take care of them. Everyone from the Party, both older teens and the teens still is high school often went to these, volunteering to make food, and Steve promising to drive it wherever it needs to go.

But tonight Steve, Eddie, Robin, Nancy, Jonathan, and Argylewere here to hang out at the Hideout. Corroded Coffin wasn't playing but they wanted to get out, be themselves. They wanted to drink, and dance, and not have to pretend for one night.

They walked as a group out of the bar, all holding onto each other. Liquid courage helping them put down thier inhibitions. Jonathan holding Argyle close by the waist, Nancy letting Robin wrap her arm around her shoulders while she slides her hand into Robin's back pocket, and Eddie pulling Steve under his arm, forgetting the meaning of personal space.

They let themselves be free here. Even their clothes were a little louder, allowing themselves to dress more butch, dress more feminine, dress gaudy, dress slutty, just dress how they like. Robin wore a dress shirt and a loose tie, contrasting the tight pants and loud makeup, Nancy wore a sleeveless, fitted button down, cut to show off her torso and high waisted denim shorts and a belt. Argyle wore his regular clothes, already loud enough, but loved that Jonathan was wearing his torn Clash shirt held together with safety pins, and tight leather pants and heavy boots. Finally, Eddie, like Argyle usually dresses loud enough, but opting to pair his black jeans with a cropped Metallica shirt this time, showing off the little tattoo low on his stomach, just above his groan that says Steve, having Gareth stick and poke it on him in his living room 3 weeks before. He wore a black hankie in his left pocket. But Steve, the polo princess himself, was the most shocking change. He wore short black shorts with a cropped mesh top, he had mid calf socks on and tennis shoes. He even wore eyeliner and strawberry lip gloss(his favorite since the summer he worked at Scoops.) Of course he wore a matching hankie but in his right pocket, loving being put on display, being able to share that he's with Eddie.

They are all laughing and having fun, when suddenly Steve stops in his tracks, causing Eddie and the other's to stop too. "What is it baby?" Eddie whispers.

"Look." He points with his head getting them all to look over at the group of people coming from the other direction towards the bar. People didn't come down here unless they were queer, and this group had no right being their. It was Tommy, with his arm wrapped around Carol, a couple of the other keg boys Steve used to hang out with, and thier girlfriends. All of these people he has heard torment queer (or suspected queer) kids in high school even if he wasn't out yet(though Tommy knew) "Why are they here?!" He is pissed.

Robin grabs his shoulder softly, "It's fine, Steve. How about we just go home?" Steve looks back at her incredulously. Jonathan is nodding, agreement in his face. They both look nervous. Steve guesses that people like Robin and Jonathan didn't necessarily have the best experience in High school having to deal with people like Tommy...like him. And he wants to fix that.

"They have no right to be here." He says anger still in his voice. Eddie pulls him closer, kissing his cheek. "Stevie, what do you wanna do?"

"Just give me a moment..." He holds up a finger, before pulling away. They all watch as he walks up to the other group. The beer and the couple shots of vodka making him braver.

"Harrington?" Tommy asks, almost laughing. "What the fuck are you wearing? God, I knew you would eventually fuckin lose it and come out as fucking fairy." The rest of Steve's group coming up behind him, he wishes they wouldn't have since now they are going to get wrapped up in this. A few people walk the streets on either side of them, coming and going from the bar.

"What are you doing down here, Tommy?" Steve spits, ignoring the previous comments.

Tommy steps closer, Carol under his arm. "You know, checking out the freaks." He sneers.

Steve leans closer "Down here, you're the freak." He grins, matching the ugly sneer on Tommy's face.

"What did you call me, faggot?" He pushes closer getting to close to Steve. Hearing and seeing this, Eddie walks closer, stepping between the two men. But Steve barely notices. Instead he pulls away, turning to the crowd forming around them

"Hey excuse me. Ugh this is Tommy Hagan. He just called me a faggot." There were a few gasps, with Robin smiling at him as the other's in his group looking dumbfounded. Tommy's group was equally as confused.

"Tommy doesn't like faggots. Or.." a big smile forms across his face. "Maybe he likes them more than he thinks."

"Shut up, Harrington." Tommy says behind gritted teeth.

Steve just smirks and finishes. "He let me suck his cock. The faggot gave Tommy Hagan a blow job." Steve leans back in his face, past Eddie. "And he loved it."

He is referring to a time sophomore when Steve blew him after school in the locker room. Steve was just realizing he was bi, and they wanted to do it. But Tommy never wanted to talk about it again after it, even if Steve had made him cum moaning his name, too ashamed, gaslit Steve into believing for years it was just him, that Tommy didn't really like it.

Tommy is shaking with anger as his friends look at him. With the growing crowd, he knew he couldn’t fight Steve here. So he shoves his finger in Steve’s chest and says "You are so fucking dead, Harrington." Before turning around storming off.

His friends gather around him, so fucling proud of him, pulling him into hugs. Eddie wraps his arms around Steve’s waist from behind, pulling him close and kissing his cheek. "You go, baby girl."

And Steve can't help but glow, walking to his Beemer, clinging to his friends. He knows tomorrow when this gets out, his life will be hell but for tonight, he's happy.

[gideonthefirst]

3, 17, and i'll re-ask 16 to get whatever other one you meant!

3. What were your top five books of the year?

WAHOO! I like this one it's made me realize that I actually loved way more books this year than I was giving credit to. Let's say:

5. We Have Always Live in the Castle by Shirley Jackson. Loved loved loved this one it's turned me into a big #ShirleyHead and also (along with Hill House) is responsible for some other takes I've had about books this year which I'll expound on later.

4. Go Ahead in the Rain: Notes on a Tribe Called Quest by Hanif Abdurraqib. Nobody's doing it like him. Only music writer I've ever read who is actually capable of communicating the music itself just over text, loves the things he writes about so strongly that it makes you as the reader love them too, beautiful beautiful collection and piece of work. A Little Devil in America would be on here too but I'm limiting myself to one book per author to resolve both this and the Nabokov problem.

3. When the Angels Left the Old Country by Sacha Lamb. First book I finished in 2023 and one of my all-time favorites :] It's so smart and so lovingly written and so complex and doing such fun things with religion and history and gender and also it's a fun and excellently-paced read. Recommend without qualification

2. Lolita by Vladimir Nabokov. Well. It's Lolita innit

1. Stephen Florida by Gabe Habash. Would I argue that Stephen Florida is "better" than Lolita? Who knows. Depends on the day. But I did love it more than any other book I've read in recent memory. The most directly invested I've been in a story in a long time, spent huge stretches of it being so stressed out about multiple things at once that I had to pause every five pages to catch my breath. Stunning depiction of a deeply unlikable character who you still want to win an unwinnable situation. Hostile to any attempt of a reader to figure out what it "means" or is "saying". Fantastic commitment to character voice. Perfect ending that had me totally motionless and speechless for maybe ten minutes. Have never in my life been more disappointed to find out that an author hasn’t written anything else. Man. Nobody is doing it like that.

16. What was the most overhyped book of this year?

Sob really funny of Sarah to get Annihilation and you to get The Only Good Indians by Stephen Graham Jones. This wasn’t my first answer because it certainly is less broadly overhyped than Annihilation but I haven’t heard a single other person have negative feelings about it and I’m baffled by this. It fell into such a constant and repetitive trap of overexplaining things to me, both exposition and description of things that were supposed to be scary, and it drove me nuts. It being the year of Ms. Shirley Jackson certainly did not help, since she really has the perfect balance of how much to describe something to keep it scary, which isn’t super fair to Mr. Jones but it’s true regardless. Plus I thought how it treated women was really strange (derogatory), which I would have cared about much less in a better book but in this one really stuck out and weakened it further. And overall I just did not at all really understand what it was trying to do, which could be on me but I’m certainly too annoying to admit it, the pacing did not work for me at All and it just. Ugh. Didn’t like it!!

17. Did any books surprise you with how good they were?

I was kind of shocked by how much I liked Where Are Your Boys Tonight? but I have already talked about that one. So let’s go with The Assassin’s Apprentice by Robin Hobb. It wasn’t like life changing or anything but it was a much more fun read than I was expecting since last attempt I made I bounced off the narration style immediately. But despite its many many concessions to the great weaknesses of epic fantasy I still intend to read the sequel and I especially love how Hobb engages with, uh, pain and sickness and disability and how she refuses to let them fade away and seems to really understand the extent to which pain and extended sickness alter people. I’m so so so excited to get to the torture because of this

[ravenousgf]

I had been ready to trigger that change. Taffy had been my tool to do that to myself. Because I could see the tumbling consequences of being where the other children would see me. I had placed myself where they could catch me. Because I had known that I had to do that. I had to do that to put myself on my path. The path I’d seen in glimpses since before I was born. Anyone could change the future. Every one of us changed the future constantly. But Dwalia was right. Few could do what I could do. I could see, with absolute certainty, the most likely consequences of a particular action. And then I could release the bowstring and send that consequence arrowing into the future. Or cause someone else to do so. The knowledge of what I could do dizzied me. I didn’t want it. I felt ill with it, as if it were a sickness inside me. Then I was ill. The world spun around me. If I closed my eyes, it went faster. I clutched at the blankets, willing myself to stillness. The cold gripped me so hard I thought I had already died from it.

this is such an interesting section the first part has bee take control of the torment inflicted on her with her ability of foresight and ponder the power over others she holds in the process like she's trying to give herself permission to move from victimhood to responsibility. but its immediately followed by the recollection that she never asked for the talent and being born this way has made her a target more often than not and her disability leaves her at the mercy of others. throughout the series robin hobb has asked through fitz what does it mean to be a victim of empire what does it mean when your upbringing and parentage seal your fate what happens to the blood on the sword after you wield it. and the cycle continues with bee--her disability makes the most banal of circumstances a discomfort or danger to her. the tragedies they are shaped by fundamentally oppose each other it reiterates the conflict of individuals vs systems from the angle of blood vs belonging. for fitz's childhood it was judged safest he grow up away from his father, both as a means of denying his personhood and reinforcing his blood through service for the crown- undoubtedly bee will be used as the same by the servants if she grows up away from her father. which kingdoms are worth giving children to. if fitz was called nameless the dog boy and used by verity to bear dutiful is that equivalent to the way the servants breed for a prophet. does the replication of abuse make it more recognizable or less. etc

[bookshelfmonkey]

November wrap-up

I'm actually posting this somewhat on time this month. This might have something to do with me being too tired & sick to focus on actually reading right now. This might also mean that the reviews are even more unhinged than normal, or maybe that they're just utterly incomprehensible. We'll see.

Anyway

King Henry VI pt. II- Shakespeare- 1/11/22- 1/10

Boring. Also I can't remember it.

In An Absent Dream- Seanan McGuire- 4/11/22- 10/10

Pretty banging. Love this series. Kinda sad though.

Lord of Ravens- A.K. Faulkner- 4/11/22- 7/10

I like this series the more I read it but I'm not sure if I like it enough to read the rest of it. I feel like certain events aren't discussed in enough depth. I'd like more discussion and character development.

From A Low and Quiet Sea- Donal Ryan- 6/11/22- 4/10

Needed speech marks. That would have got it at least another 1/10. Some of the narratives were individually interesting, although not all of them. Felt kinda detached, like it lacked any authorial emotion and passion. Needed speech marks. Also the narratives didn't really come together in a comprehensive way. I would've liked that. Needed speech marks.

Henry V- Shakespeare- 12/11/22- 1/10

They all merge together after a certain point.

We Hunt the Flames- Hafsah Faizal- 14/11/22- 7/10

I wanted to love this more. Still pretty good, but I feel like I've read similar things that were also better. I wanted more from it.

The Many Half-Lived Lives of Sam Sylvester- Maya MacGregor- 16/11/22- 9/10

I don't think I trust neurotypical people's reviews of this. Everyone was saying the 18yo protagonist seemed childish & naive but as someone around that age, who thinks a similar way, I think they're just unfamiliar with reading a character who doesn't understand social cues/situations. The mystery was pretty good, I was invested. Characters were actually brilliant. Loved it all. Tabbed a lot of quotes on being trans & autistic. Thought that was well done.

A Prayer For the Crown-Shy- Becky Chambers- 17/11/22- 10/10

Didn't enjoy this as much as APFTWB, but it still felt kinda enlightening in its own way. Funny moments with Mosscap always rule. Would love to read more about these 2.

Hell Followed With Us- Andrew Joseph White- 18/11/22- 10/10

Absolutely unhinged in the best ways. This book means more to me than I could ever express and I feel so strongly about it. I could write an essay on this. I might write an essay on this. I might write many essays. We shall see. Anyway I love it and you should read it. Very trans. Very autistic. Very cool.

Ship of Magic- Robin Hobb- 20/11/22- 8/10

A different type of story to the Farseer trilogy but not necessarily worse. I think I just really desperately wanted that one guy to get what he deserved to the point at which I couldn't enjoy the book as much as I might have otherwise been able to,

The Kingdom of the Gods- N.K. Jemisin- 27/11/22- 8/10

Hard to comprehend. Interesting to read. An ending.

Venus and Adonis- Shakespeare- 28/11/22- 3/10

Spent so long focussing on trying to understand this that I forgot to understand it,

The Tournament At Gorlan- John Flanagan- 30/11/22- 10/10

This still slaps. Love the humour. Love the vibes. Love the plot. I'm also kinda starting to build up a case for some of these characters being (probably incidentally) ND-coded. Maybe that is one of the reasons I love it so much. Maybe.

[silverbastardgoldenfool]

Realm of the Quarantine Reread End-of-Book Questionnaire: Assassin’s Quest

Any differences between your first/previous reading experience and this one?

Keep in mind I’m writing this months after finishing the book lol (it’s mental illness innit). I have LOTS of notes to go off but yeah, things aren’t as fresh in my mind overall. With that said the biggest difference I can think of between my first and second experience with AQ is my feelings towards Kettricken. I think the first time around reading you know that Fitz is an unreliable narrator but you are still limited by his viewpoint so you can get a bit trapped seeing things the way he does. For this reason, I think I pretty much just forgave Kettricken when he did on my first read, whereas on this read I was like……. Waiting for her to actually apologise and show some sympathy towards Fitz and it just…. Never happened.

Like, don’t get me wrong, I still love Kettricken as a character and I fully recognise that she has been traumatised. I don’t expect her to be nice or act rationally, and in the case of being willing to take Nettle for the crown… It’s cold but she’s doing what she feels she has to. My issue is - do what you have to, but don’t expect Fitz to understand or forgive you (same with Starling). But I think what bothered me the most was how Kettricken would constantly confide in Fitz and break down to him and he was always there to let her do so, yet she NEVER gives Fitz the chance to do the same. The one time he does “open up” in a sense is when she forces him to air out his traumas in front of everyone, and she didn’t show him any sympathy for what he’d been through then or later. She has been through hell, absolutely, but while her plight may not have been any better than Fitz’s it certainly wasn’t any worse. She pretty much had two modes in this book: completely cold or a crying wreck - but she was only ever crying for herself. She lets Fitz console her but she never consoles him. Again, this is a result of her own trauma and I don’t expect her to act any differently, but it just reaffirmed for me that while she and Fitz care for each other deeply it is not an equal relationship. Fitz feels an obligation to serve her and she - knowingly or not - takes advantage of that. Like, after realising that this is their dynamic it is so obvious that the same is true in Royal Assassin as well, and it will be interesting to see how it changes (or doesn’t) in Tawny Man as I don’t remember it well enough to say.

Must reiterate: Kettricken is still a great character and I still have a lot of respect for her, unfortunately she just falls into the overfull camp of people who love Fitz but have an unhealthy power dynamic with him.

The other big difference I noticed was that the Verity stuff just wasn’t as devastating this time. Not because it was any less sad but it just didn’t tear out my heart like it did the first time. That’s not a fault with the writing at all, I think it’s just the fact that, knowing what would happen to Verity and that we wouldn’t see the real Verity again, I kind of already let go of him at the end of Royal Assassin.

Something you can’t believe you forgot

I guess more of a misinterpretation/wishful thinking but like, realising that there is no passage explicitly stating that Fitz and the Fool were actually spooning in the mountains murdered me and spat on my corpse.

Oh also!!! Fitz yeeting himself out the window at Tradeford castle jskaskjf

Favourite character introduction moments/scenes

I love Kettle in general and the way we’re introduced to her as a cranky old lady sets her up perfectly

Favourite character arcs

Man they’re all so fucking sad lol but I guess the Fool? He goes from thinking Fitz is dead and his purpose failed to reuniting with Fitz, their relationship growing into something really real for the first time, and actually completing his mission - at least for now lol. This book is really the first time you get to see the Fool be properly vulnerable. Even when he was getting beaten up by Regal’s guards he always had his veneer of snark and superiority to hide behind - and I doubt when he went through his sicknesses at Buckkeep he would have revealed his weakness to anyone in order to be helped. But in the mountains he lets so much of that facade of the King’s Fool fall away - at least when it’s just him and Fitz. When he and Fitz meet again he lets Fitz see his grief and pain and hopelessness and joy as the Fool looks after Fitz, and then later when it’s the Fool who needs looking after he lets Fitz look after him. When was the last time the Fool had anyone really care for him like that, ya know? Had someone protect him purely out of love? Ouch dude!!!!

Also he gets to kiss Fitz at the end so good for him!!!!!!!!!! Be gay ride dragons!!

Favourite quote/s

“I would kill Regal. It only seemed fair. He had killed me first.”

“I had looked into the heart of my enemy. I still could not comprehend him.”

“The more I drank, the less tolerable my situation seemed. And the more intolerable I became to my friends.”

“I had never thought to be disdained by a tree.”

“The Fool, the Fool, only the Fool. I sought for him. I almost found him. Oh, he was passing strange, and surpassing strange. He darted and eluded me, like a bright gold carp in a weedy pool, like the motes that dance before one’s eyes after being dazzled by the sun. As well to clutch at the moon’s reflection in a still midnight pond as to seek a grip on that bright mind. I knew his beauty and his power in the briefest flashes of insight. In a moment I understood and marvelled at all that he was, and in the next I had forgotten that understanding.”

“When you can either laugh or cry, you might as well laugh.” - the Fool

Favourite relationships

Fitzandthefoolfitzandthefoolfitzandthefoolbahslbghabfhalgngjba 

Also fitz and nighteyes (speaking of which, Nighteyes’ arc in this book is also fascinating and surprisingly complex) and Fitz/Nighteyes/Fool mwah magnifico chef’s kiss

Favourite setting

Kelsingra baybeyyy. I remember the first time reading this having no fucking clue what was happening in that chapter but I guess it was the gay agenda all along

Favourite chapter

It’s gotta be the chapter where Fitz and the Fool reunite, right? Catch me just gradually losing my grip on reality with every lingering stare 

Most loved character

Foooooooooool

Most hated character

Ya know, for a minute I was actually wondering if I would like Starling this time round but yeah no lol. She was actually okay for a while but as soon as she sold Fitz/Nettle out she became The Worst, just as I remembered her. It’s not even because she betrays Fitz but because, like Kettricken, she expects Fitz to forgive her for it, to the point of running to tattle to the queen because Fitz isn’t giving her enough attention (I’m also not impressed with Kettricken for actually getting involved instead of just telling her to grow up). Not to mention her constantly misgendering/gendering (??) the Fool or just assuming the Fool’s gender and loudly fucking proclaiming it to everybody is just truly fucking disgusting. Like I cannot even explain how furious I was reading her incessantly using she/her pronouns for the Fool despite no confirmation that her theory is right or that the Fool is comfortable with this and despite EVERYONE ELSE using he/him pronouns. God I’m mad now lol. She just acts like a spoilt brat and it makes my blood boil. But that’s probably because I have known many people like this so… Good character writing lol congrats

Raise your hand if you’ve been personally victimised by Robin Hobb (most heartbreaking and/or visceral moments)

The whole first chapter/s are just so heavy and carry on that gut wrenching feeling from the end of Royal Assassin. Fitz just has no real desire to live and watching him systematically severing the last few ties he has to his human life is just so sad.

Even though I wasn’t as attached to Verity this time, his goodbye to Fitz still made me cry

As did Fitz giving Kettle her skill back

Verity using Fitz’s body to have sex with Kettricken really got to me this time, mostly because I either didn’t notice the first time or had forgotten just how much it affects Fitz. It’s no wonder he doesn’t want to acknowledge Dutiful as his son when the event that brought that fact into being was so fucked up and traumatic. It’s really upsetting.

Burrich saying he almost took Fitz to Chivalry and he should have never let the Farseers take Fitz just …… breaks my heart. Just seeing Burrich so raw like that in general is so unusual it really takes you aback.

Details, observations, spoilery notes made with the benefit of the full picture

Strap in lads this part is lonnnngggggggg

Is it bad to immediately want to cry just from seeing “Sandsedge” on the map and thinking of Sandsedge brandy

I never really thought about how poor Hap didn’t get the real Fitz all those years and how their relationship could have been if Fitz hadn’t been partially forged

Pls I have no idea why but to picture someone as emotionally repressed as Fitz actually sitting down and writing about his life makes me want to fucking cryyyyeeeee

Fitz in the prologue talks about needing a purpose as something to distract himself from sinking [into his chronic pain, mental illness and addiction] and boy howdy if that ain’t relatable. As someone with mental illness and chronic pain Fitz is just painfully relatable way too often.

“I have never forgiven myself the triumph I ceded him when I took poison and died.” Fitz :(((( my guy :((((((( forgive yourself for surviving however you could baby!!!!!

This book mentions Bingtown providing slaves to Chalced

It’s so funny to me when people expect Fitz to have social skills as if he didn’t literally live as a fucking wolf for weeks at a time. It’s a miracle he bloody speaks

The state Fitz is in at the beginning of this book was literally Burrich’s greatest fear for him, yet Burrich doesn’t just say I told you so and leave. He stays, is patient and even optimistic.

“He (Burrich) is not bigger than I.” Why does this feel so wrong lol??? I just can’t picture Fitz as bigger than Burrich

“When you were younger and not supposed to go into taverns without me…” So it’s fine if the child goes into taverns and gets drunk as long as you’re also there. Got it, Burrich.

Fitz calling Chade “the grey one” wow get rekd old man river

Seeing Chade and Burrich interact is so bizarre

Fitz is still having seizures at the beginning of this book! I had forgotten that

God okay so idk if I can articulate this point super well but the whole thing of Fitz going through this extensive abuse and then essentially becoming an animal feels like a metaphor for the way your brain’s “higher” needs and functions just shut off sometimes under certain levels of stress. Like in order to cope with the trauma you don’t think about concepts, or long-term goals, or other people. You just take care of your basic needs - food, sleep, shelter, water - long enough that you start to feel safe and secure again, at which point your brain can open up a bit more and allow you to really think again; to want again, to plan again etc. Like obviously literally becoming an animal is a heightened version of reality, but the functionality of it is the same; our wounds and our fear stop us from fully embodying ourselves.

Burrich be like, Fitz was getting way too dependent on drugs before all this so let’s steer clear of those. :) LET’S GET HIM ABSOLUTELY SHITFACED INSTEAD

I  love how Fitz has his own unique relationship with Lacey and she’s not just Patience’s servant in his mind

Fitz talking about how even his memories from before his time in the dungeons are soiled by his trauma :( baby boy

Dude it’s so rich Chade lecturing Fitz about not making a life for himself, having friends or just chilling out like???? WHO TRAINED HIM TO BE AN ASSASSIN CHADE?? Like I get your point but what the hell kind of life did you think he was gonna have? Who ever took the time to teach him the importance of making connections with people for their own sake, and when would he have ever had the time anyway? I think Chade himself doesn’t actually know what he expects from Fitz.

Fitz saying he’s bad at making decisions because he’s never actually been allowed to make any is literally a point I’ve made lol. This is what happens when you teach teenagers how to murder in lieu of any basic life skills.

Burrich + Chiv were luv at first sight. No I will not elaborate.

“We kept you a boy, looked after you too much.” Huh??????? Fitz was never fucking sheltered lol. He didn’t have autonomy. There’s a difference.

I’m so fucking glad Fitz hugged Burrich before he left and that they actually left off on okay-ish terms. I didn’t remember that and it vaguely dulls the blow of knowing we don’t see Burrich again til Fool’s Fate (and that he thinks Fitz is dead the entire time between now and then).

“If I shaved my hair back from my brow” bitch disgusting

“Honey was the older of the two women. Perhaps my age.” jskfjnajgbl my guy those aren’t women then those are children!!!!!! U freak

I was wondering for ages why Fitz doesn’t mention the Fool like literally at all bc that’s so unusual right? Even in Assassin’s Apprentice he thinks of him when he goes to Moonseye and just in general the Fool usually enters Fitz’s thoughts pretty frequently. So why now, when Fitz doesn’t even know if the Fool is okay, is he just not thinking about him? And then I realised that that is exactly why. Because the only two people from his old life he doesn’t think about are the two people whose fates he knows nothing of: Kettricken and the Fool. So he can let his mind wander to think what Patience and Lacey might be up to at Buckkeep, or who Molly is with or whatever, because he knows they are all safe. But in such a fragile state I don’t think he can bring himself to really wonder whether Kettricken and the Fool made it to their destination - he probably doesn’t really believe they could have, and that is far too painful a road to go down when you are trying not to think at all.

I know the first act of this book is slow and that bothers some people, but I think it is so necessary, not only for Fitz’s arc but also because it really demonstrates just how severe the situation has gotten with the red ships and forged ones AND it shows just how destructive a king Regal is. Without this perspective it would probably be much harder to buy that the extreme measures taken at the end of the book are really worth the sacrifice.

Fitz is Demisexual, Exhibit A: when Honey is coming onto him, all he can think about is Molly.

Fitz is so scared of the Forged ones :( his trauma affects everything. He has no faith in himself and less heart for the violence than ever.

Speaking of trauma metaphors: the way Fitz tends to drift off into the wit or Skill after a traumatic experience is… pretty much just dissociation but magique

I forgot that witted folk can apparently communicate with each other mentally, not just with animals

“Her head was the size of a bushel basket.” Ah, yes, a bushel basket, a thing whose size we are all intimately familiar with.

Fitz finally finds others like him and even then he is not fully accepted. Told he is doing the wit wrong. Othered by the Others. It’s the queer experience innit.

Also forgot that apparently the forged are attracted to the wit as well as the Skill?

“I wondered if I had as many wolf mannerisms as they had halk and bear.” Yeah no probably not you only bloody LIVED as a wolf, Fitz.

Okay I know it doesn’t need saying but Patience is just so fucking cool!!!!!

Jesus fucking christ, Fitz skilling out to Molly when he knows Will knows he’s alive and is looking for him is just… so dumb. So so dumb. I know he’s just fixating on her because he’s miserable and she’s like this unsullied thing he had before everything went wrong but holy moly is it frustrating 

Not to mention he doesn’t connect the dots between the fact that Burrich went to “help a friend” and every time he reaches out for Molly he sees Burrich sajkdbshkhja dude

Nighteyes leaving just goes to show that Fitz cannot rely solely on Nighteyes for companionship. No matter how innately the same they are they are equally as innately different. Fitz needs Nighteyes but he shouldn’t have JUST Nighteyes (which is why he, Nighteyes and the Fool are the holy trinity). When Nighteyes leaves, Fitz is in way too fragile a state to be left alone, but Nighteyes cannot think of the future or what might happen. All he knows is he’ll be back at some point and that’s all that matters.

“My anger fed my competence” whatever you need to tell yourself sweetie

I think I had blocked out the fact the Regal was keeping animals trapped in filthy cages so they could ravage people in the king’s circle uggggghhhhhhhhh I hate him

Fitz is down on himself saying that without Shrewd’s largesse, Chade’s information and Verity’s protection his idea of himself has been stripped away and that he’s not actually competent etc. but like. This is an extreme situation!! You’re literally alone in the wilderness with nothing and no one!! Who would thrive in this situation? And nobody gets by without help anyway! The people in our lives do define us to an extent. You don’t have to be able to stand 100% on your own at all times with zero resources to be considered capable. It’s human to depend on others. Yes I am chiding myself as much as Fitz here :))))

Burrich’s earring is the repressed gay earring. No I will not elaborate.

Fitz refusing to sell Burrich’s earring is frustrating yet something I would 100% do lol

Direct from my notes: Celery hiding out in caves?? Bad bitch

“I felt I was within the flames looking deeply into the Fool’s eyes” um okay gay

It’s actually surprising that Fitz admits he would not have gone after Molly even if he had known she was pregnant when she left. On one hand so self aware yet this doesn’t stop him from completely idealising their relationship.

And then you have Molly who says he was supposed to come after her “so she could forgive him”, that he was supposed to be the one to light the candles for her childbirth etc. The fact that she in any way thought he was mature enough to be a father just shows how little they really knew each other.

Burrich treating Molly like a horse while delivering Nettle is way funnier than it has a right to be jskakjasd makes me think of Dwight treating Phyllis’ back injury in The Office lol

The first thing Burrich notices about Nettle is that she has Chivalry’s brow are you fucking kidding me. Gay!

Fitz is Demisexual, Exhibit B: He had no interest in Tassin whatsoever until she literally started kissing him. At this point his body reacted, which is normal, but as soon as he got a second to actually think about it he stopped, because for him it would not be satisfying to sleep with someone he didn’t have feelings for.

“It seemed to take years for the dried beans and lentils to soften.” Okay mood

I love how Fitz just assumes Molly will take him back. “I have a woman and child awaiting me.” Says who bitch?

Small ferret? More like big legend

Ya know, we give Fitz so much shit but honestly with so much physical, mental and emotional stress on this journey how can we expect his mental faculties to be at 100%? I wouldn’t be making good decisions either, in fact I would be long dead.

Starling telling Nik that the earring once belonged to Chivalry is truly a smooth brain move

“Do not fear, little brother, I am here to take care of you again.” Words can’t explain how much I love Nighteyes and how often his dialogue makes me smile :’)

It’s so cute how Nighteyes is worried about Molly and Nettle until he knows that Burrich is taking care of them

It’s really interesting when Fitz claims “I’d rather be with Molly even if it meant rocking a crying baby in the middle of the night” because, well, he’s literally made other claims to the contrary, saying he wouldn’t have gone with her even if he’d known she was pregnant. Because at the end of the day as much as Fitz is compelled by others to do work for the greater good, I think deep down a lot of the time it is what he would do anyway. Like I really don’t think he could actually enjoy being with Molly knowing that the world is burning down around them. He would want to get out there and help somehow; not only to secure their own future but to reduce other people’s suffering as well. He’s an empathetic boy even though he’d like to be selfish.

Every time Fitz calls Molly his wife I lose ten years off my life

Again, I understand why he’s thinking like this, but Fitz’s ownership of Molly is just so uncomfortable. The fact that he can’t imagine her not having a place ready and waiting for him in her life when he returns just illustrates that she is not a fully realised person to him. She is just a comforting idea.

Oh yes, it was definitely Starling’s “pillowtalk” that got you captured and not the fact that you fit the exact description of the witted bastard right down to having Chivalry’s earring and a whole ass wolf

Somehow forgot that Jhaampe is basically a city of tents with only a few permanent buildings and people constantly coming and going

Fitz’s first words to the Fool are “I’ve come to you.” I’m gonna fucking die

Literally every single word from the moment Fitz realises it’s the Fool and starts describing him is a full body assault and personal attack I am seeking reparations

God the tenderness, the angst, the relief……… shall i pass away

“I doubted he was much taller, but his body was no longer a child’s.” My dude this is a gay awakening if I ever saw one

Fitz be like *spends 87 pages describing the Fool in painstaking detail* anyway I love being a heterosexual male

I’ve heard ppl cite Fitz’s descriptions of Kettricken as evidence of a crush (hard disagree) but literally nothingggggg even comes close to the way he describes the Fool. Not just this once but over and over again it’s insane.

“Talk fell off between us. The bottle of brandy was empty. We were reduced to silence, staring at one another drunkenly.” skjakfnajghajgnaLNGJ is it gay to silently gaze into thine homie’s eyes

The Fool protecting Fitz from everyone - especially Starling - in Jhaampe is often hilarious and always heartwarming

Realising Fitz was skinny enough for the Fool to lift on his own ahhh no wonder he said the famous “When I recall how beautiful you were” line, Fitz is a total wreck

I love that the Fool actually gives Chade shit for his plan to take Nettle. I love him.

“Too few folk cared for me. I could not hate a single one of them.” Oh, Fitz :(

I always wonder how the Fool really feels about Molly. Is he jealous? Does he compare himself to this woman Fitz idolises and he doesn’t know? Does he know that Fitz is barking up the wrong tree or is he stuck thinking Molly must really be Fitz’s soulmate since he won’t shut up about how much he loves her and can’t wait to get back to her? He just never really lets on how it makes him feel when Fitz has relationships with women. We know Fitz gets jealous of the Fool (for litch rally like no reason lol), so with the Fool being much more honest with himself/in general about his love for Fitz and having much more legitimate reason to be jealous, is he? Or is it just something he’s made his peace with, that these women give Fitz something that he cannot? Is he okay with that cos he has to be or does he have a different, less monogamous view of love and relationships (he does have three parents after all). I dunnoooo dude I just have so many questions. Like obviously - OBVIOUSLY - if Fitz and the Fool didn’t have romantic feelings for each other before, there is no doubting that romantic feelings appeared the moment Fitz appeared in the Fool’s hut. Fitz won’t admit that but mere chapters later the Fool is talking about how he loves Fitz in every way so like. He knows. So how does he feel when Fitz is calling out for Molly in his sleep, or openly speaking of seeking her out when all this is over, and lying to the Fool to protect Molly and his daughter. Really makes u think!!!!

Fitz reuniting with Sooty and going to see her every day in Jhaampe is so cuuuute and made me so happy. Sooty is a good girl :’)

Fitz be like *leans against the table where the Fool is carving and watches his fingers at work like a true repressed gay*

Verity is literally so strong???? He submerged himself in skill and was able to pull himself back from the stream can u imagine? Go off king!

Bro I literally can’t with the Fool mentioning Jofron so casually and Fitz immediately thinking wow oh my god they’re definitely fucking oh my god the Fool has a girlfriend - Fitz sweetie calm down

I love how Fitz and the Fool just naturally walk together :))) and Nighteyes babysitting Kettle is so cute

Molly never once says that she misses Fitz. She says she always expected him to do the right thing, to come after her and not leave her alone with a child. But she doesn’t look back on their time together fondly or have much positive to say about him as a person. And all that is fair, but it’s also just… Not really the behaviour of someone who’s been separated from their soulmate. It’s more just someone who’s been left in a shitty position by someone they cared about but hardly knew.

Fitz asking the Fool what is between him and Starling when they’re literally just being civil is sooooo fucking funny. Not everyone finds the Fool as irresistible as you do, Fitz.

The Fool just casually finding a pretext to call Fitz the light of his life

Fitz telling Kettricken firmly that he will not travel if the Fool is ill is one of the only times he ever puts his foot down with her GEE I WONDER WHY

I’ve said it before I’ll say it again…… there really do be something about the way Fitz can’t meet the Fool’s eyes………. It’s not like they’re weird and colourless anymore like they used to be!!!

The Fool already talking about Clerres in this book!

Fitz and the Fool and Nighteyes playing in the stream is too fucking pure omg, it’s what they deserve

And then Starling has to bloody ruin it bc she’s homophobique

But seriously, Fitz actually lets go for the first time in ages and has a nice evening only for Starling to go tattling to Kettricken, and Kettricken having the gall to confront Fitz about it. And then Fitz solves the problem by saying he doesn’t disdain her when like!! He has every right to!!!! She sold him out, sold his daughter out. She never even apologised but instead has just been totally petty and self-righteous and stirring up trouble amongst the group. She hasn’t earned or even asked for his forgiveness. So fitting that she’s the one constantly judging Fitz for his relationship with Lord Golden in Tawny Man lol, she just cannot let Fitz and the Fool be the queer icons they are!!!

Verrrrrrrrrrry interesting that Fitz only “suddenly missed the human warmth and comfort” of Starling taking his arm or sleeping against him literally IMMEDIATELY after the plumbing and love confrontation with the Fool. I mean he has been doing all of those things with the Fool (sleeping together, walking arm in arm etc.) so it’s not about human touch at all, it’s about convincing himself that a WOMAN’S touch is somehow inherently different.

He does the same thing with Starling as with Kettricken. She technically apologises but it’s not sincere and that’s not why he forgives her. Same as Kettricken, she tells her sob story and he can’t hold onto his anger. It makes sense, but it’s just very toxic. It would be nice if at least one person would really recognise how much they’ve hurt Fitz and really, genuinely want to atone for it, or apologise without expecting forgiveness. The onus should not be on Fitz to forgive Starling but on Starling to grow up and not need Fitz to like her in order to remain civil and do what they have to. Also “I do not find your wit bond offensive” has the same energy as someone telling you out of nowhere like “It’s fine that you’re gay :)” like wow thank u?? lol

Fitz is Demisexual, Exhibit C: “I wanted her with a desperation that had nothing to do with love, and even, I believe, little to do with lust.”

“By his love he is betrayed, and his love betrayed also.” So fate agrees with me, Fitz and the Fool are in love? :)

Anytime the potential that Fitz might have to choose between Molly and Nighteyes I lose brain cells. That’s ur brother Fitz!!! It’s not even a choice!! How dare u

It’s just sooooo intentionally laid out for us in this book that Fitz’s relationship with Molly really wasn’t good or healthy and that his fixation on it is misguided, and I think that’s why I struggled sooooo hard with the ending of Fool’s Fate, because it kind of implied the exact opposite. I’m hoping on this reread I will pick up on it being laid out as a result of Fitz getting his memories/teen feelings back rather than it just feeling like a lowkey retcon, but I guess we’ll see lol

“I felt I was a bit in love with him, you know. That sort of lift to the heart.” the confirmation that the Fool KNOWS HOW IT FEELS TO BE IN LOVE sends me deep into the swamps goodbyeeeeeeeeeeee

“The one who loves him best will betray him most foully.” So fate agrees, the Fool loves Fitz best :)

“You do love me! … Before, it was words. I always feared it was born out of pity.” Godddddd Foooooooooool!!!!!!!!!!! 

Everything about Fitz, the Fool and Nighteyes meeting in the skill for the first time is just truly perfect iconic unparalleled.

Fitz’s love for Verity hurts my heart so much. Just think of the relationship they could have had if they weren’t stupid royals.

Kettle’s whole speech about Fitz and Molly… Just yes to every word.

Look I’m just gonna say it… The way Burrich reacts to Molly’s advances … like I know it’s probably not intentional but it just reads as very much fitting in with my headcanon that he is gay. As soon as she makes it clear she wants to sleep with him he like leaps across the room lol. I do believe he cares for her and loves her in his way, but it does feel mostly like he’ll just do whatever he needs to to care for her and the baby.  Sowwy

I wonder why the Fool wasn’t as affected by his giving up of memories to Girl-on-a-Dragon?? Or was he, and he just gets them back before we see him again in Tawny Man?

“Take my hurt that I never knew my father, take my hours of staring up at his portrait when the great hall was empty and I could do so alone.” um this is so fucking sad

It was the Fool who sent Starling to find Fitz after Verity uses his body and again I have to ask, wtf is going on in your mind, Fool!

Fitz is Demisexual, Exhibit D: Even once he actually sleeps with Starling he has no enthusiasm about it, he just kind of goes along with it, likely to prove to himself that he has really let go of his past/Molly. 

I always wonder why the Fool leaves now. Is it because he thinks their work is done and doesn’t want to risk messing things up by hanging around his catalyst like at the end of Tawny Man? Does he intend to come back and find Fitz again but get sidetracked by a lead or a new dream? Like it’s just weird because at first he was like “Prophet and Catalyst stick together” and was gonna stay with Fitz - or was that just an excuse because he was obsessed with Girl-on-a-Dragon? Fool u spicy lil enigma

It’s blood and the wit that wakes the stone dragons so does that mean King Wisdom was witted? Or is that obvious lol

Fitz isn’t even bothered by the Fool’s kiss, just shocked. I am looking.

Patience shouting orders at Verity-as-Dragon is beautiful ksjjk

Of courrrrrssse Burrich names his first son Chivalry

In the epilogue, the Fool is the only one Fitz actually says he misses. Exquisite.

I know some people have an issue with Regal’s death but personally I find it delicious

Okay that’s all (I say as if this wasn’t 139841989 pages long). See y’all in 92 years when my sister finally starts reading Liveship!

[cptablovegood]

Absolutely no one asked for this or probably even wants this but I’m less than a hundred pages in to Fool’s Errand and Fitz and Beloved are already ruining me so I’m literally just going to make a note of every time they’re being super in love (even if Fitz is constantly obtuse and refuses to admit it) just for my own (in)sanity..

———————part 1————————

Apparently only original posts show up in tumblr searches some imma just have to keep adding on to this rather than reblogging hope you’re ready for a shit so guys!

“I see a love that wends its way in and out of all your many years. That faithful heart has been absent for a time, but is soon to return to you again.” A witch reading his LOVE LINE! She also makes a direct comparison to Molly. Fitz foolishly thinks it’s about Starling but Beloved arrives soon after so we know its about them. HIS LOVE LINE GUYS!

“Your one true love is stitched in and out and through you life. Love will return to you.” You could interpret this as being about Molly as I think they end up getting back together after Burrich has died but I’m way more inclined to believe this is about the Fool. For one its the same witch says its right after the above. Fitz himself also dimises Molly. But mainly the phrasing. The White Prophet and his Catalyst are often described as being interwoven and bound together despite of any distance and time. Like the metaphors are parallel making me think this is about the Fool. Which means… Beloved is Fitz’s one true love! Guys can Robin Hobb just give me a fucking break please!

*a whole paragraph admiring a horse* “The rider was fully worthy of the horse.” He thinks his mans is fine ok!

“He smiled. Something turned over in my heart. I moistened my lips, but could find no words, no breath to utter them if i had. My heart told me one thing my eyes another.” Ummm how fucking in love is Fitz? He hasn’t seen the Fool in 15 years and he’s speechless and his heart is doing somersaults? His eyes are saying wait that’s not how i remember the fool but it doesn’t fucking matter he KNOWS its the fool HIS HEART KNOWS.

“I open my mouth, then helplessly spread wide my arms. At that gesture that said all I had no words for, an answering look lit his face.”Again he’s literally speechless but that doesn’t even matter the Fool can fully understand him. Soulmates don’t need such trivial things as language to communicate!

“He glowed as if a light had been kindled in him” Im sorry thats some romantic shit.

“He did not dismount but flung himself from his horse towards me.”  Hi the Fool literally launched himself off a horses back into your arms!

“The horse shied away but none of us paid her any attention.”  They’re so absorbed in each other.

“In one step i caught him up. I enfolded him in my arms as the wolf gambolled about us like a puppy.”

“‘Oh Fool,’ I choked. ‘It cannot be you, yet it is and I do not care how.’” Emotions are literally choke him he’s about to start crying, I-

“He flung his arms around my neck. He hugged me fiercely. … For a long time he clung to me like a woman.” Yeah we know Fitz has some old misconstrued ideas about love and gender so for him to even parallel that is a lot ok…

“Until the wolf insistently thrust himself between us.” Ok so not only would they have carried on clinging to each other if Nighteyes hadn’t have forced them apart but also the wolfs reaction is super fucking important as well. Like Nighteyes is Fitz’s Wit beast. He has never loved another person other than Fitz so loyally and without question. When he first meets the Fool he trusts him straight away and calls him pack long before anyone else. Fitz even gets jealous of their bond in the first trilogy until Nighteyes explains that why shouldn’t he trust and love someone so fiercely if Fitz already feels this way about them.

“…wiping away tears. I did not think less of him for them. My own ran unchecked down my face.” Urgh thank you Robin Hobb for letting men cry! But they are both so overcome with emotion and not ashamed or embarrassed to show the other person that they’ve been brought to tears by their reunion like wow they’re so in love.

“He flowed to his feet, every nuance of his grace as familiar to me as the drawing of breath.” He likens simply seeing the fool moving to something that is habitual and that sustains his life I-

“He cupped the back of my head and in his old way, pressed his brow to mine.” I would argue more tender than a chaste kiss.

“He stared at me, his eyes touching the white streak in my hair and running familiarly over the scares on my face. I stared just as avidly…” they’re drinking each other up after so many years apart committing each other to memory again.

“The wide grin that lit his face erased all years and distance between us.” something as simple as a smile can bring them right back together like they haven’t been separated for 15 years.

“I felt something from him; the thinnest knife-edge of of shared awareness. … ‘All down the years’ his voice going as golden as his skin ‘you have been with me, as close as the tips of my fingers, even when we were years and seas apart. Your being was like the hum of a plucked string at the edge of my hearing, or a scent carried on the breeze.’”Maybe I’m smoking crack but I think this might be the most romantic thing ever? ‘his voice going golden as his skin’ why does that warm my heart so??

“‘Had I possessed the Skill in truth you would have known I was there. At your fingertips, but mute.’ I felt an odd easing in my heart at his words, for no reason I could name” Fitz mate thats love. Love and the confirmation and realisation that you had never and would never truly be alone or lonely.

“It was a boys thing to do, this immediate offering to share a prized possession and my heart answered it, knowing that no matter how long or how far apart wed been nothing important had changed between us.” Like you might be men full grown now, having lived completely separate lives, not knowing each other for the last 15 years but your love is so pure it has not been marred by age or distance!

“I blinked my eyes and for a minute I was back in the Fool’s hut in the mountains, healing from my injury while he stood between me and the world” he remembers how the fool protected and shielded him and nursed him back to health.

“He created reality around himself, bringing order and peace to a small island of warm firelight.”

“Light ran up his cheekbones and dwindles as it merged with his hair.”

“‘In the space of a sundown, you show me the wide world from a horses back and the soul of the world within my own walls.’” Before the Fool came Fitz was feeling listless and suffocated by his own life. Is there a more beautiful thing than being renewed to vigor by someone you love? The Fool basically brings him all the possibilities and life that he had forgotten he could have. Also he calls the Fool ‘the soul of the world’ how fucking beautiful is that. and the fool is so fucking happy that he could do that for him.

“We are whole.” This said by Nighteyes which I again think is super important. He feels the same about the Fool as he does about Fitz. And although him and Fitz are Wit bonded and him and the Fool not he does not feel that they have been truly complete without him.

“Like sundered pieces of crockery that snick back together so precisely that the crack becomes invisible, the Fool joined us and completed us.”

“The Fool’s presence was in itself an answer and satisfaction.”

“That evening remains for me always a moment to cherish as golden and fragrant as brandy in crystal glasses.”

“I stayed away from you as long as i could. he offered the words like an apology.’ He literally cant keep himself from fitz. “Any time that you returned to visit me would not have been too soo” And Fitz doesn’t want to be left alone Beloved he wants your company!

“Nighteyes and I spoke as we did was not an effort to exclude him from our circle. It was that our circle made us one in a fundamental way we could not share. ‘Yet once we did and it was good.’” Even the wolf wants them to all be joined again and share their thoughts and feelings!

“He extended his hand to me as if he proffered an invisible gift on those outstretched fingertips. I closed my eyes to steady myself against the temptation. ‘I want it as i want breath itself Fool take it away please.’” He is having to ask the Fool to remove the temptation because he wants that wholeness, that one’s again so badly but he knows it’s a bad idea. It is taking all his will to decline it and I think of the Fool offered again he wouldn’t be able to resist a again. Also this is the 2nd time he has likened the Fool to something as fundamental as breathing.

“‘I dreamed of you once. You were sick or injured. A man leaned over you, I felt he wanted to hurt you so I-’ ‘It’s quite likely ou saved my life.’” Even when the Fool was Amber and Fitz did not know her his subconscious was looking out for her and protecting her. He fucking skill pushed someone to leave her alone without even realising it was her.

“‘Sometimes when I was most alone I mocked myself that I could cling to such a hope. That I could believe I was so important to anyone that he would travel in his dreams to protect me.’ ‘You should have known better than that.’ I said quietly.” Ok so this hurts my heart a little because Fitz always denies that he loves the Fool the way in which he wants to be loved by Fitz. I mean I don’t think that’s true at all because their love is way more intense and intimate than any woman that Fitz has ever been with Molly included the only boundary between him and the Fool is sex which arguable we know Fitz doesn’t always think is related to love cos he slept with Starling. And it fucking kills me that when Amber was in her darkest place she clung on to the hope that Fitz did truest love her but at the same time laughed at herself cos Fitz himself had told them otherwise previously. And here he has the audacity to contradict her. Like how could you ever doubt it? Cos you told them to doubt it mate! Why are you so fucking obtuse Fitz!

“‘Should I?’ He gave me the most direct look I have ever received from him. I did not understand the hurt I saw in his eyes nor the hope. He needed something from me but I wasn’t sure what it was.” Urgh again Fitz is so blind! You just need to hold him and admit to him how much you love him get over yourself and your whole ‘I can’t love you like a man loves a woman’ bullshit cos like the Fool rightfully said you didn’t love Molly cos of what was under her skirts!

“‘Were you expecting me to leave tomorrow?’ ‘I thought you might I didn’t hope it.’ ‘That's good then for you could have hoped in vain.’” They’ve finally been reunited after so long and neither one of them wants to leave the other.

“I suddenly realised the immensity of what i had asked him … like all direct questions I had ever asked the fool I both dreaded and longed for the answer.” This just feels very fucking intimate to me lads sorry to say

“‘Good night Beloved we have been apart for too long.’” Umm the Fool fucking gave Fitz his own name. His true name that he had never told anyone. His name that his own mother called him. They’re gunna ruined me these two.

This is literally only the first chapter that they have been reunited in and my heart already can’t take it!!

[ars-matron]

Rules: answer 17 questions and tag 17 people you’d like to know better

@thestoryoflight tagged me. Thank you, dear, it was fun getting to know you better ♡

Nickname: everyone calls me Jess, just like automatically, I never ask them to in person, I always introduce myself as Jessica.... Another Jessica started going to my school growing up so after a week of people yelling "Jessica!" Just to watch us both turn around people started calling me JJ.

Then...in no particular order. Jester. Messy Jessy. Monkey Butt (thank you grandma). Maradeth. And now The Ars Matron

Zodiac: Aquarius!

Height: 5′3.5″ but I just say 5'4" for things like my ID and the doctor cuz it's easier.

House: Slytherin! All the way. My next closest house was Ravenclaw.

Last thing I googled: Animal shelters near me, I want to donate some extra litter and blankets to them.

Song in my head: Nothing at the moment. Most often it's Just Dropped In by Kenny Rogers....why, you ask? The Big Lebowski

Followers and following: I don't actually know. I don't really care. I had a lot before the Purge and in a fit of disgust deleted my blogs. I came back mostly because I keep getting sick and wanted a place for my readers to find me if I went too long without posting anything on AO3

Amount of sleep: Not nearly enough

Lucky number: The numbers 2, 5, 7, 8, and 0 always follow me around. I see them more as guiding numbers than lucky numbers.

Dream job: hmmmmmm. I guess just getting paid to write would be awesome

Wearing: Black T-shirt from The Surly Wench, my favorite local pub. And flamingo lounge pants that are two sizes too big.

Fave songs: oh man... Pretty much anything Mark Lanegan. I'll just throw some links your way.

Carnival, Mark Lanegan

Hit the City, Mark Lanegan and PJ Harvey

Methamphetamine Blues, Mark Lanegan

Josephine, Mark Lanegan

Bananas, That 1 Guy (Hilarious and lovely, listen to it!)

Mustaches, That 1 Guy (Same as Bananas...really all of his songs are like this)

If want to see more of the insane jumble of music that I enjoy, HERE is a link to my personal playlist on youtube. Enjoy!

Instruments? Started playing the violin when I was 9 years old moved on to the viola at 12 (stopped playing 16 because my teacher was a sexist idiot) with the help of my friends I taught myself how to play the flute at 13 (our band teacher didn't know how to play the flute, so the whole flute section was just winging it... again, he was an idiot)… taught the band teacher how to play the fife when the school got a bunch donated when I was about 15. (It was the first time I'd ever seen a fife and I learned it on my own in an afternoon, but it was beyond the capacity of a man in his 50s who had taught band for 20 years to figure out)

Random fact: You mean besides having a deep dislike towards my old band teacher ?(≧▽≦)

I'm legally blind. I just feel like it's going to be something most people on the internet don't know about me. And the blind community is so often shoved under the bus I always want to make sure it's seen in some way shape or form. I was born with cataracts, and ocular albinism (and possibly retinas pigmentosa That one is hard to pinpoint but it runs in my family so I keep an eye on it) I went to the Arkansas school for the blind, lived on campus from age 9 to 16 until we moved closer to the school, which was one reason Harry Potter really caught my attention growing up. I've had two major eye surgeries, and one laser surgery (I’ll most likely need more as I get older and the cataracts keep growing back), and I really, probably, need to start using a cane....

Favorite Authors:  Robin Hobb is hands down my favorite. Please read Realm of the Elderlings and come yell at me about them!!

I also love. Philip K Dick, Chuck Palanuik, C S Friedman, Robert Jordan, Douglas Adams, and Maggie Stiefvater. I'm sure I'm missing a few. I'm gonna go ahead and put Hunter S Thompson in cuz I need to finish Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas but the little I've read so far is amazing.

Fave animal sounds: For some reason my cousin and I were curious about what peacocks sound like one night and looked it up and now the thought of peacocks warbling always makes me so happy cuz of how funny we found it when bored and hyper that one night.

Aesthetic: Oh man...Dark Academia, is one. Though I usually dress more grunge for someone who is slightly too young to have lived through the grunge era. Also I love bright colors. Rainbows, mishmash, eclectic everything. I'm all over the place, really. My goal is to start adding some 1940s vintage looks into my wardrobe.

Tag People: Okay I don’t know about tagging 17 people, but I’ll just start tagging whoever comes to mind. Prepare yourselves. And none of you are under any obligation to do this! In no particular order! @listeningboy @xupz @hermitknut @mahalsbutt @d2diamond @genuine-firefly @grompbutt @peonyfoxburr @inkaalhun @beescream @king-ghidorah (Because why no all the rote people I can think of) Okay...If you see this and want to do it and I didn’t tag you please do it and tag me and I’ll look! 

[signourneybooks]

There were some firsts this month which was interesting to say the least. There was also a lot of coughing and overal sickness though so I’m not sure how I feel about January yet.

There are an awful lot of reading challenges down below. For the first month I’m keeping it this way and after that I am going to always have the amount reading challenge and my own. And alternate a bit between the others. I think I’m going to do an update and a wrap up of the harry potter board game over the year instead of taking it along here as there are so many levels and all.

The Numbers

# Read 60 Books Read this month: 12 Total: 12/60

Shadow of the Fox (Shadow of the Fox 1) by Julie Kagawa / 3,5 stars // ARC

The Crown Conspiracy (The Riyria Revelations 1) by Michael J. Sullivan / 4 stars

The Girl in the Tower (Winternight 2) by Katherine Arden / 5 stars

The Winter of the Witch (Winternight 3) by Katherine Arden / 4 stars // ARC

A Pinch of Magic by Michelle Harrison / 4,5 stars // ARC

Cogheart (The Cogheart Adventures 1) by Peter Bunzl / 4 stars // ARC

Wintersong (Wintersong 1) by S. Jae-Jones / 3,5 stars

And the Ocean Was Our Sky by Patrick Ness / 3 stars

Shadowsong (Wintersong 2) by S. Jae-Jones / 3 stars

The Ingenious by Darius Hinks / 3 stars // ARC

Every Heart a Doorway (Wayward Children 1) by Seanan McGuire / 4 stars // Reread

Avempartha (The Riyria Revelations 2) by Michael J. Sullivan / 4 stars

Average: 3,8

Fire Breathing Dragon: 3/20 Prompts Completed This Month: Thief / Fairytale Retelling / Classic Fantasy

Complete Alien: 1/20 Prompts Completed This Month: Steampunk

Generic Robot: 4/12 Prompts Completed This Month: WOC / Finish a Series / One word title / Mental Health

Total: 8/52

Read more about my own reading challenge here.

Level: Mt. Vancouver (36 books) Read this month: 8 Total: 8/36

Rules: Books Owned Prior to 2019 / No Library Books / Rereads can count (but not in the last 5 years read) / I Am Counting My Ebooks and ARCS received before 2019

Level: Elemental Witch  (11-15 retellings) Read in this month: 6 Total: 6/15

Level: 1 (1-10) Asian Authors Read: 2 Total Asian Authors Read: 2

⌘ This month was a bit meh on the health department. It took a month for my voice to be back to normal again and a week later it wasn’t exactly great again but also not completely gone. I also got sick for the 3rd time in 2 months which is just really frustrating. And then on the last day of the month, poof my voice went again.

⌘ As you know I have been working on my depression since the end of last year. I got to the half way point with my one on one appointments and she suggested trying a course as group therapy instead of continuing on like this. I started it this month and have been twice now. There are a total of 8 sessions and we follow a book (with homework assignments yes lol). So it does require some extra work from me, especially on the emotional front again. It was interesting to see I also recognized some thoughts of it as I was reading Shadowsong.

⌘ I managed to burn my hand just below my thumb. Very certain a portion of it is a second degree burn. Fun times.

View this post on Instagram

A while ago @therealrobinhobb offered to exchange postcards and of course i send her a #dikkiedik postcard. This weekend i got a lovely card back with a bookplate. Thank you so much ❤️ . . . #bookstagram #booksofinstagram #booksofig #readersofinstagram #bookaddicted #booklover #bookobsessed #spreadthebooklove #blogger #bookblogger #boekenblogger #robinhobb #bookplate #foolsfate #thegoldenfool #realmofelderlings

A post shared by Annemieke (@signourney) on Jan 15, 2019 at 12:21am PST

  ⌘ A few months ago Robin Hobb offered on her website (and mentioned on her instagram) that she liked to send out postcards if we send her one. So I did that. And this month I got her card and a book plate. So amazing. ❤

Reviews

⌘ A Curse So Dark and Lonely by Brigid Kemmerer / ARC ⌘ Shadow Captain (Revenger 2) by Alastair Reynolds / ARC ⌘ Pop-Up Guide to Hogwarts ⌘ The Girl in the Tower (Winternight 2) by Katherine Arden ⌘ A Pinch of Magic (A Pinch of Magic 1) by Michelle Harrison / ARC ⌘ The Winter of the Witch (Winternight 3) by Katherine Arden / ARC ⌘ Shadow of the Fox (Shadow of the Fox 1) by Julie Kagawa / ARC

Top Ten Tuesday My 5 and 4,5 Star Reads of 2018 / 2019 Releases I Am Looking Forward To – January to June / New to Me Authors in 2018  / Books I Meant to Read in 2018, but Didn’t… /

Other Posts Dancing Out of December 2018 / Dancing Out of the Year 2018 / My Year in Books 2018 Over on Goodreads / End of the Year Survey 2018 / Trying to Be an Elemental Witch – 2019 Retellings Reading Challenge / 2019 Goals & Intentions for Reading, Social Media and the Blog/ Time to Crunch Some Numbers – Reading Statistics 2018 / Why You Should Be Watching Jordskott / From US or UK Cover to Dutch Cover / Year of the Asian Reading Challenge / Books I Want to Reread This Year

⌘ Justice League / Movie Surprisingly I actually liked this. The plot wasn’t that special but the underlying tensions in the relationships were. I was worried I wouldn’t like the flash since I’m so used to the tv show The Flash. But I shouldn’t have worried. Its Ezra Miller. The only thing I wish that it wasn’t that he endlessly was used for comic relief and that there was more humor for the group as a whole. The flash stood out like a sore tumb because of his youth and because he wasn’t as brooding as the others.  More interested in seeing Aquaman now (instead of just for Jason Momoa).

⌘ Astroboy / Movie I’d never watched this and when I was browsing on demand when I was sick I came across it. I liked it. Its cute. It could have done with some more depth (and poeh certainly some more poc) but overal it was a nice watch.

⌘ IT (2017) / Movie I had some time left over one day and I decided at random to watch this. I’ve never read the book or seen the older movie. I actually liked it. I mean the whole thriller parts aren’t exactly my thing but I enjoyed the characters and their relationships. Beverly ❤

⌘ Scooby-Doo Adventures: The Mystery Map / Movie This might be the weirdest movie of Scooby yet. They were puppets and they were shown as they were in the series a Pup Called Scooby-Doo so children. The plot was all kinds of meh so yeah not a good one.

⌘ Scooby-Doo and the Mask of the Blue Falcon / Movie This one had more of a old scooby doo feeling again. But the plot didn’t really interest me.

⌘ The Passage / Season 1 / Ep 1-2 I was going to try and read books 2 and 3 before I went to look up to watch this show, like in a few years, lol. But then I saw that our Fox also started showing it very quickly after its release in the USA, and here we are. This is really just the set up and it doesn’t diverge from the book that much. Amy however in the tv show is so kick ass. Love her.

⌘ Zoo / Season 2 / Ep 1-4 We finally started this season and it is so weird oh my gosh. And addicting in a way. But so weird. Like a train wreck. You just can’t look away.

Blogs

⌘ Jackie from Death by Tsondoku talks about Jólabókaflóðið. ⌘ CW from The Quiet Pond shares their most anticipated diverse debuts for 2019. ⌘ Crini from All About Books updated her spreadsheet for 2019. ⌘ Noura from The Perks of Being Noura had me in her item The Life of a Reader. ⌘ Kathy from Books & Munches has the fantastic february fantasy themed month. ⌘ CW from The Quiet Pond, Shelea from Shut Up Shelea!, Vicky from Vicky Who Reads and Lily from Sprinkles of Dreams are hosting the Year of the Asian Reading Challenge. ⌘ Jamie from The Perpetual Page-turner talks about how her reading life has become more rich and full. ⌘ Greg shares things he’s learned from Game of Thrones. ⌘ Ely from Of Wonderland shared a list of 2019 Releases featuring disability. ⌘ La La in the Library posted the January Snidget with all the Harry Potter News. ⌘ Shannon from It Starts at Midnight talks about open endings. ⌘ Fadwa from Words Wonders shares why she loves rereading. ⌘ Brianna from Pages Unbound talks about miscategorizing adult books as young adult. ⌘ Have you seen Cait’s cover reveal of her second book? ⌘ Imryl from X=1 has created a recommendations list for my reading challenge. You can find part one here!

Dutch Blogs

⌘ Liesbet from Zwartraafje always starts the new year with numbers from last year. She also shares if she stayed within her book buying budget.

⌘ #SapphicAThon 2019 starts on February 1st to February 7th and I am planning on reading two books for that: Down Among the Sticks and Bones and The Abyss Surrounds Us.

⌘Other than that I want to read my pre orders (King of Scars, Firestart, both arrived way late), some review copies and do my buddy read with La La in the Library for The Darkest Legacy.

⌘ As for the blog, I am going on a Semi-Hiatus to fix some of the broken photos. There are still posts coming along like top ten tuesday and a wrap up post, and some books I read for review. But no more than that. Hopefully it will give me some breathing space to fix the broken photos, even though I really don’t want to spend time on it again. -_-

This monthly wrap up will be linked up with the monthly one by Nicole @ Feed Your Fiction Addiction. This so we can blog hop to each others wrap ups easier.

Dancing out of January 2019 There were some firsts this month which was interesting to say the least. There was also a lot of coughing and overal sickness though so I'm not sure how I feel about January yet.

[gaiahypothesims]

Get to know me

Tag ten followers you want to get to know!

Tagged by @enchantedunicornhideout !! Not sure if I should say thanks or not.. HAH

Name : Shark bait hoo haha

Gender : Fembot

Star sign : Virgo. Obviously. You should be able to tell from my chaste writing and screens.

Current wall paper?: Its just a river scene that I took... I have no idea why its still there. I feel like it just did it on its own.

Ever had a crush on a teacher?: No. But there were a couple good-looking male teachers in high school. I never had them, but they were ok to look at in a purely aesthetic way.  If you could be someone else right now, who and where would you be?: I love being me, but I do wish I could be on the beach somewhere with a large trust fund. Coolest Halloween costume?: I dunno. I don’t really do that anymore. Who was your last kiss?: A kiddo... or my SO. I can’t remember. Probably the sick little kid... and then I shuddered and crossed my fingers that I wouldn’t get the pooping puking illness.  Favorite book: I really like the Assassins Apprentice series by Robin Hobb, Oryx and Crake by Margaret Atwood is another yearly read. Depends on the mood really. I like Amy Tan books as well... if I want to ugly cry while reading. Fav 90’s TV show : Buffy probably... I don’t remember what else I used to watch! Simpsons...  Every been to los Vegas?: YES! A few times. Once with a girlfriend and we got free drinks and entry to places just for being foolishly youngish and female. I actually really like the big Cirque du Soleil shows. I’m not much for gambling. I put $10 in the slot machine the last time I was there.  Favorite shoes?: Occassion occassion occassion. I got some new hiking boots... so that’s fun. I do love me some heels, I had some really comfy Guess ones.. but then the dog chewed up the heel. :(

Favorite fruit?: Pomegranate...? White nectarines (that aren’t quite ripe). I’m not a great eater of sweet things.

Whatvisthwatipidest thing you’ve ever done?: Get into cars with strangers (strange men). Never had it go wrong, but holy hell batman. What a stupid kid I was.  I’m going to tag: Anyone that wants to do it. I need to get back to my queue because I’m going back to work soon and am going to be busy again!!! 

[ered]

oh hey, book talk meme

1. First things first, what is your MBTI type? - INTJ

2. When did you learn to read? - when I was six

3. What languages can you read in? - Finnish and English more or less fluently, pretend to be able to read Japanese, sort of can almost read Swedish

4. What books are you currently reading or most recently read? - I'm reading a book about medieval Finland and The Wilful Princess and the Piepald Prince by Robin Hobb

5. Name 3 books you never finished: - James Joyce’s Ulysses, and dozens of poorly written romance novels.

6. What are your favorite books from childhood? - Mauri Kunnas’ books, all the horse books I could get my hands on. Later on, I got into fantasy and reread the Belgariad like eighty-five times

7. What are your current favorite books? - Howl’s moving castle by Diana Wynne Jones, the Earthsea series by Ursula K. Le Guin, most of what Robin Hobb has written etc etc

8. Your favorite genres: Mystery / Sci-fi / Chick Lit / Young Adult / Horror / Nonfiction / Memoirs / Dystopias / Poetry / Self-Help / Historical Fiction / Fanfiction / Realistic Fiction / Biographies / Satire-Black Comedy / Philosophy / Fantasy / Manga

what the hell are these genres? where’s romance? why is mang a genre? lmao

9. Your opinion on rereading books: I do it all the time / I really love books but I have very little time / It has to be a really good book / I can’t stand it / I haven’t done it since I was a child / I only reread my favorite sections.

10. How long does it take you to read one book on average? - fiction: 1-3 days, non-fiction: weeks - months unless it’s really short

11. How do you typically read? - while eating, in the bed, while waiting in lines etc. I wish I could read on busses but I get motion sickness so bad

12. How many books do you typically read in a year? None or 1/About 1 to 3/Maybe 4 to 10/At least more than 10/Between 10 and 50/ At least 50/ Too much.

13. For school assigned books, what type of student are/were you? - Honestly, I can’t remember any assigned books until high school, and then we just got a list of like thirty titles and had to choose like five of those... didn’t bother me much, I think I read a few extra.

[chloristoflora]

"I see," Lord Golden said at last. "Well. Thank you for showing them to me." He turned and walked back toward the hearth.

I couldn't comprehend what had just happened. I tried again. "Fool. I think they belong in the Rooster Crown."

"Doubtless, you are correct," he replied levelly, without interest. He sat down before the fire and stretched his legs out toward it. After a moment, he crossed his arms on his chest and sank his chin down. He stared into the flames.

A flash of anger, cleansing as flame, washed through me. For an instant I wanted to seize him and shake him, to demand that he be the Fool again for me. Then the fury was gone and in its wake I stood trembling and sick. I felt then that I'd killed the Fool somehow, that I had destroyed him when I had demanded answers to the questions that had always floated unasked between us. I should have known that I could never understand him as I understood other people. Explanations had seldom worked between us. Trust had. But I had broken that, like a child who takes something apart to see how it works and ends up with a handful of pieces. Perhaps he could not be the Fool again, any more than I could go back to being Burrich's stable boy. Perhaps our relationship had changed too profoundly for us to relate as Fitz and the Fool. Perhaps Tom Badgerlock and Lord Golden were all that was left to us.

Golden Fool, by Robin Hobb (Tawny Man Trilogy #2)

[humanz-and-gorillaz]

maybe its just my phone? oh well!!! can i have the bad reacting to an s/o who is like a super fun party animal and is just a laugh when on a night out :) :p thank youu!!!! x

Oh sorry this took so long! I’m not much of a party person so I had to dig around because I didn’t want to be repetitive. I also accidentally queued it. I hope this is what you were looking for! ~Robin

2D/Stuart Pot

You had met 2D while he was getting a law degree. Coincidentally, you both happened to go to the same university and landed a few classes together in the second quarter. There was an instant connection that very quickly sprouted into a full blown relationship. The only problem though, was that every Saturday night you would disappear and never answer any of his messages or calls. It didn’t bother him too much at the beginning and he didn’t want to be rude and ask either, but as the weeks passed it got a little irritating. He first got a hint of your party lifestyle when two younger students walked past him saying, “can you believe y/n did that?? That was sick!”

“Oh, uh, excuse me,” was all he was able to get out as the students walked away, completely ignoring him. 2D huffed in annoyance at how rude they were before turning to get to class. Maybe he had just heard it in his head. He took his seat in class trying to clear his thoughts when lo and behold, the girls next to him also started talking about his s/o. Stuart was in disbelief. There was no way you could have taken that many car bombs and beat a whole fraternity at beer pong; and there was absolutely no possible way you could have won every single dance off. Actually, yes he could, you were one hell of a dancer. But still. He wasn’t sure why you had kept this wild side of you a secret but either way, he wanted to see it himself and he wanted to be a part of it. He’d lean over to the girls next to him and ask sweetly, “excuse me but, when is the next party?”

Stuart dropped the butt of the cigarette he had been smoking on his way to the party and burned it out under his shoe. He looked at the house that had a lawn littered in solo cups and people walking in and out like it was their own home. He had a cute little boost of confidence as he stepped into the crowded house and wiggled his way around to find you, enjoying some drinks along the way. Your moves were entrancing, the way your hips rocked and the way you smiled while you sang along made his heart race. You were lost in the music, solo cup in one hand and the other in the air when you felt two arms wrap around your waist. Your first instinct was to shove whoever did that off of you but the grasp was comfortingly familiar. You turned around and saw it was your boyfriend 2D who had this eager look in his eyes. You two had danced in each other’s apartments for kicks several times before and he had that same exact look now. You smiled and handed your cup to someone before taking 2D’s hands and dancing. Neither of you touched a drink for the rest of the night as you were both drunk off of each other’s moves and laughs. Even as the crowd dissipated, you both kept moving until your body could no longer keep up. You pulled him down to your height as you yelled into his year it was time to go home.

2D carried you on his back since your apartment was walking distance. You had a dorky little grin on your face, arms loosely hanging over his shoulders. “I didn’t know you liked parties y/n.”

“I love them.”

“Is there another one next week?”

“Yea, it’s at Brian Collins’ house.”

“Can I come?”

“Don’t ask stupid questions, Stuart. Of course you will. That’s not an option.”

Russel Hobbs

You had invited Russel to join you to the block party near your house. You had just moved into your neighborhood that was a foot away from a college so there was no doubt that the parties would be wild, alcoholic, and filled with people looking for a little extra that night. During the summer time your street was nice and quiet but the college students were back and you just couldn’t resist the opportunity to sneak into these parties. Russel wasn’t the biggest party person but you really wanted to go to these parties and how could he say no? Besides, a majority of college kids couldn’t even keep it in their pants yet so maybe it wasn’t a bad idea to come along just in case. Every house on the street had lights on and music loud so you went hopping from house to house. Russel although hesitant at first, quickly got into the feel of the night and the energy you provided. He’d been a little reserved at first as well, simply watching you and looking out for anyone with dirty intentions. The night was still young when you made it to the third house. It was obnoxious and you could feel the bass of the music in your chest and the inflated egos with only a table full of beer between them fought for the title. You loved it. The music was deafening so Russel didn’t hear when you said you wanted to have a turn at beer pong. After a couple of minutes you turned to Russel and beckoned him over to be your partner. He gave the other side a challenging look with a smirk plastered on his face. If there was one thing that he was good at in regards to parties, it was beer pong. The vibrations of the music rippled the beer inside the cups very soon to be replaced by those of the pong balls landing inside. One. Two. Three. Four. Five balls landed on the opposing team’s side before they got one in on your side. He offered to drink it, you simply laughed and downed it like it was water. As the night wore on, your energy began to rub on him. Very quickly he was playing all kinds of drinking games with you and taking shots of tequila between bittersweet, messy kisses. Being such a party person, you had quite the tolerance but you couldn’t keep up with Russ. When you stumbled over to him in high spirits he knew it was time to call it a night. “Just one more house babe,” slipped out of your lips over and over as he carried you back home. He laughed and figured you didn’t even realize you two had left the parties behind. He listened to your incoherent mumbling that was always followed by a “you know?” while helping you put on something more comfortable and responding with “yea I know.”

“Hey Russ?”

“Yes y/n?”

“Am I gonna have a hangover tomorrow?”

“Most likely.”

‘Oh…will you take care of me then?”

“Of course.”

Noodle

When Noodle found out you were a party animal she was ecstatic about it. While she wouldn’t call herself a party animal, Noodle knew all of the places to get down and she didn’t mind going out to nightclubs from time to time. It took you both a couple weeks to clear up your schedule but boy were you both excited when the upcoming Friday fit perfectly. You’d both gotten all dressed up for the club you were heading to. You were both a little hesitant since it was Murdoc’s recommendation so who knew if it really was as great as he made it sound. You and Noodle sat in the uber silently. You could call it the calm before the storm. You slipped the guard at the entrance a twenty to let you skip the line. Both of you initially were simply shocked by the nightclub. The only light available was the blue neon lights and strobe lights over the dance floor. Noodle grasped your arm in excitement and pulled you over to the bar. “On the count of three, okay?”

“Okay.”

“One…two..three!” You both downed the shot. Noodle scrunched her nose at the burning sensation but you didn’t flinch as you went for another one. Once you both had loosened up you made your way to the dance floor. Maybe it was the alcohol, maybe it was the music, or maybe it was the fact that Noodle was here with you, but either way, you went wild. Every step was in sync with the music. Every sway of your hips snagged Noodle’s attention. You were simply intoxicating to watch. She was quick to join you, hands on each other’s hips as you both went into a high from the music. Both perfectly synchronized as you shared kisses between bass drops and highballs. You danced together until the buzz of the alcohol started to wear off and your feet ached. Noodle took your hand and both of you wandered over to a table. “I bet I can drink more than you.”

“Are you challenging me?”

“Loser pays for the cab next time.”

“Deal,” and so both of you counted to three and took a shot. Then two. Then three. Four Irish Car Bombs and a variety of highballs that made you both choke as your throats burned from all of the intake. It was perfect. Noodle lost count after who knows how many highballs and both of you lost track of time. Neither of you realized that the nightclub had closed nor did you want to leave so the poor, tired Stuart Pot had to drag himself out of bed at 3 in the morning to pick both of you up. It took a little convincing to get you both to stumble out of your chairs and to the car. You and Noodle were supporting each other, arms wrapped around each other and uncontrollable laughing when the other lost their footing on your way out. The car ride home was nothing but the exchange of kisses and giggles; 2D even got criticized for his driving at a few turns. The exhaustion truly hit the Both of you when you stepped foot in the house and dragged each other up the stairs before collapsing on Noodle’s bed. She had fallen asleep as soon as her head hit the pillow with her arms wrapped around you as you began to drift. It was a blissful moment of you would even remember it in the morning, but even then, you had a lovely little hangover waiting for you.

Murdoc Niccals

It was the night before the album drop and it had been Murdoc’s idea to invite everyone and their dog to the house. You didn’t mind at all. If anything, you were pretty psyched about it considering this would be first time hosting your own party. Well, more like co-hosting. You had helped Murdoc get set up and make sure all the lights were working, making sure the stereo set was set up, and most importantly, making sure they had enough ice. He took credit for getting the ice but if we’re being honest, he only remembered after you had asked. To be honest, Murdoc didn’t take you for a party person. You were always so calm and collected that the thought of you going wild at parties didn’t occur to him even as you made those tasty alcoholic concoctions that the two of you shared as you tied up the last few strings of the night; he simply thought it was just a special talent you hid from him. People came in waves every fifteen minutes and before you knew it, you had lost track of where Murdoc had gone. You trusted him though so you went to the kitchen and had a few drinks to loosen yourself up and really get in the mood. Murdoc had simply gone outside for a smoke. He threw the butt down and smothered it with his shoe and quickly went back in. We’d be lucky if we made it to eleven without some sort of noise complaint. Fuck whoever would send that. When he entered the house it was oddly quiet, even with the music blaring at the level it was. A majority of the party was down in the basement but even then, people were usually up here chatting and grabbing drinks. A small group of girls walked past him giggling and went down to the basement. After a few seconds of debating, Murdoc made his way down and followed the bright lights and heavy bass. Murdoc’s eyes, like everyone else’s, landed on a pair of people standing over a table. They were taking shots to see who’d black out first. Due to the amount of people, Murdoc couldn’t see their faces but he knew the person on the left wouldn’t last more than six more shots. He leaned against the frame of the staircase; damn, his s/o was really missing out on this. Eight shots were exchanged before the person on the left stumbled and tapped out while everyone went wild. Some yelling in delight and others exchanging quick bets they made with the person beside them. Meanwhile, the silhouette on the right bounced up and down in celebration of their win. Murdoc decided that because he was the host he needed to congratulate the winner. He pushed his way through the crowd that was slowly going back to what it was before. “You really did a number on that other fellow didn’t you?” When you turned to respond Murdoc’s jaw hit the floor. There was just no way that it was you that won that bout of drinking.

“Oh I know, right? I thought he would last way longer than me but I guess not and-” you looked at Murdoc and snorted. He wasn’t hiding his thoughts at all. It was a little cute but more funny than anything else, “what? Surprised that your s/o can handle their alcohol?” He still had a bit of a dumbfounded look as you dragged him towards the center of the floor and began to dance, with him following soon after. He was absolutely in love with this newfound you. Murdoc watched as you danced and he quickly followed suit to match your dancing with his. You were both having the time of your life, dancing innocently at first, but nothing remains innocent for long with you in his reach. Murdoc had a dirty little grin on his face as he concluded that he definitely needed to take you to more parties.