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pendragaryen · 4 years ago

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The things that stay with us...

This was supposed to be my last BFSN-post while the show is still airing - the last BFSN-entry right before the series finale. But now it’s just... a FSN-post? Call it a Big-Hug-post. A Hug-Gratitude-post. Or whatever you prefer. Though in my heart Bellarke will ALWAYS be canon (and nothing can ever change that): They didn’t give it to us in the actual show (a show, whose narrative clearly told us otherwise all this time, but well.. whatever...). It’s too much honour to grace such a disappointing last season with a BFSN, dearies. (Or... even more so now? ;P ) So, call it what you like i guess! ;). Honestly, i didn’t want it to end.. just like that... without any last words to you, the kindest, most tolerant and beautiful minded fandom i’ve ever been (proudly!) a part of since 2016. (The selfie lies. It’s not current. I’m sorry, i can’t show you my face these days.. This is from the day just before it all went inevitably down with this season: BB’s death. So... enjoy: That smile’s for you, fam! ;) 2nd pic: The tattoo i got almost two years ago now, on Sept. 22nd 2018, and that never fails to remind me of my emotional support person and the fact, that after every “down” in life there will come an “up” again <3<3<3 )

What makes the whole experience of this last ever season of The 1OO for me so incredibly sad is.... Well, please bear with me if you will... My english STILL isn’t the very best... But i’m trying to put my feelings into words:

Last year, when we got the news that S7 would be the final season, i DREADED this moment. I was AFRAID of this last day (and the hours) before the actual finale. And why so? Bc I am a person, who’s an incredible loser when it comes to let go of the things i love so dearly. Like The 1OO. I... in times i was OBSESSED with it, with the story, with the chacracters and the way they’ve been written, so credible, so tangible in their actions, nothing was just bad or good and even the villains actions had been understandable to some extend. It was amazing! I felt with almost every character! I LOVED it. (And to be very clear here: I’ll never STOP loving The 100′s 6 seasons, that are still existing for me!)

But what i wanted to say is: I dreaded the moment when l would have to let it go. THat inevitable moment, when this show with all its storylines and characters, that have been a part of my life for the last years and that i love so dearly, really ends. Forever. It would end and i wouldn’t be ready to let go, bc it means the world to me. Bc it changed me in more than just one way - no, even better, bc it made me want to change myself! “To do better...” *ugly crying...* THis show SAVED me in a way and in a time, where i was in a very dark place in life, in a very dark mind space (constant illnesses, termination of my job due to these illnesses, an ugly lawsuit etc. pp) , this show and its actors, especially one Robert Alfred Morley (yes), who helped me to look at myself and my mental insecurities and illness from a whole new point of view. I wasn’t ashamed of myself anymore. I felt... relieved. Understood. I even felt kind of loved for what i am, even with my anxieties. (There may or may not come a point or even a person in everyones life, that helps to develop this new kind of view on themselves. And for me this person was and always will be Bob Morley. And whatever happens, i’ll always love him for his open- and kindness and be thankful for his inspiration. I still call myself lucky to have talked with him a couple of times. I treasure these moments. Always.)

So, i was AFRAID of this day, when this all would come to an end. I KNEW it would wreck me, i would be devestated, i would be so incredibly sad, that i won’t be able to put it into words.

And here i am now. I AM sad. I AM devestated. But for so very different reasons that i could never imagine in my wildest nightmares... This last season... Season 7--- no i won’t start again. Not AGAIN. But... just that: What they’ve been creating for us here... it really overshadowed my joy of watching this show throughout this last season, yes even BEFORE that horrible murder of my all time fave and comfort character. I take back whatever i said about S6 or even S5. THIS... S7 was the season, that didn’t feel like the show i fell in love with anymore. Though changes CAN be refreshing and exciting... these changes haven’t been that for me.

Look. The thing is: Even WITH Bob’s request for time off and everything... There would’ve been PLENTY options for the writers to actually make it all make kind of sense! THEY COULD’VE DONE IT BETTER! If they’d really wanted to, that is... And here’s the point: I think they didn’t WANT it. For whatever reasons, whatever happened bts, they decided to do it like they did. And no-one’s able to understand their choices or the characters anymore - those characters we used to know so well, these characters i felt with over the course of so many seasons - who i could understand! EVEN THE VILLAINS! And now... look at the thanks we got. I can’t understand shit anymore when it comes to S7. Bc nothing makes sense. When i see even the GREATEST meta-writers among us surrender in their posts - than it’s really sad times for this fandom...

It’s not even just about Bellarke anymore. Sure, i AM disappointed that they’re not canon now. But then they shouldn’t have arranged the whole story around these two! “The backbone of the whole story”!!! I am laughing. In that case S7 was SPINELESS! Let me tell you. Everyone’s just... flailing around... great little side storylines, but somehow... disconnected from each other and all over the place. That’s how it felt for me to watch this season. And i’m feeling so exhausted by now... I never stopped hoping... I always thought, at some point it would make sense. I’ve read all your great metas AND I WANTED TO BELIEVE! It made perfect sense! (I seriously felt like Fox Mulder from time to time this season... and the lack of sense in the storyline as well as the complete absence of my personal faves (yes i include Clarke (Eliza) here, bc heck, she was so sidelined this season too, self inflicted or not) - all these things had been the “UFO’s or aliens i was hoping to see” one day... Guess i was wrong.)

I’m babbling... Sorry. But it will be for the last time in that kind of form. Promise.

At the end of the day (at the end of all things.. sigh, Frodo... i see you... *blinks back tears*) I am so glad that you’re all here with me, in the same boat. That I’m not alone feeling this kind of lost and baited and betrayed. Bc whatever you like to call it: The narrative promised us otherwise. Did JRott OWE us canon Bellarke? NO. Of course not. But HIS STORY did. The story he’d been telling us for SIX GD YEARS! THAT is what makes me so mad. But most of the time (and despite the selfie above) i’m just sad. Sad and disappointed. I know it will pass one day. And that i’ll find joy in watching S1-4, even S5 except for a couple of scenes, and certain episodes of S6 again. But now is not the day. Even IF they’ll give these characters a “happy ending” in some transcended form or whatever, in the afterlife maybe,... S7 is ruined for me. It wasn’t even a bliss for me before, but it was certainly ruined after they killed “The Heart” - pointlessly (THIS is what will haunt me even years from now..).

Today is the day for saying goodbye. It aches my heart, that we’ll have to do it the way we have to now. But at least we are together. So let’s raise a glass in honour of all the hours of joy and excitement this show brought us over the years, maybe even the tears and laughter, let’s raise a glass for the outstanding performances of the cast and the great storylines some writers developed for us. I am thankful beyond words. Let’s raise a glass to this awesome, talented fandom! I’ve met and talked to dozens of you guys througout the years, and it had always been a pleasure! I hope we’ll stay in touch! <3<3<3 And last but not least: Let’s raise a glass for Kass Morgan. This is HER baby in more than just one way. Without her vision... there wouldn’t have been a show. Or even Bellarke. CANON Bellarke, that is! ;) And i LOVE it!

These are the things that stay with us, these are the things we will remember.

So, have fun with the finale tonight guys! Or should i say: Good luck? ;) I won’t watch now. I haven’t watched since 7x13, and i won’t start again tonight. Not even for the finale. BUT... i’ll probably do it some day in the future. I’m still kind of curious after all. And there are still some characters i want to know how it ends for them. It‘s just... i don’t want to support any ratings. I don’t want to support JRott anymore. But i’ll probably get back to it - if what y’all will write about it afterwards looks promising or not... ;)

See you on the other side!

(Tags under the cut)

Hugs and love to you, dear fam! Tagging @together-is-my-favourite-place @natassakar @geekyogicheese @immortalpramheda @carrieeve @bellamyblake @angelbellamy @burninghoneyatdusk @iwearplaids @wankadi @katersann @nvermindiseeyou @ruggedmurphy @clarkgriffon @poppykru @broashwhat @malclmbright @kizo2703 @cominguproses13x @clarkeindra @tenmonologues @shialablunt @sometimesrosy @zavens @wonderingwhyy @charmainediyoza @the-suns-also-rise @lee-em-dee @bellamynochillblake @junebugninja @songhyeri @underbellamy @talistheintrovert @jeanie205 @bellamys11thfreckle @doontpanic @clarkegriffinblake @goddess-clarke @eyessharpweaponshot @hostagetakerandhistraitor @infp-with-all-the-feelings @theatre-steph @historyofbellarke @as-inevitable-as-morning @bisexualbellamyblake @little-oxford-st @delicatebluebirdruins in no particular order (i am so sorry in advance, if i should’ve forgotten someone... >.<), and yes, i include you too @merlination my Danny, bc without you, i wouldn’t have started watching The 1OO in the first place... ;)

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gadgetgirl71 · 4 years ago

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Amazon First Reads September 2020

It’s that time yet again! For me and other Amazon Prime Members to take our pick of this months Amazon First Reads. So if your an Amazon Prime member don’t forget to get your free First Reads Book.

This months choices are:

Thriller

Every Missing Thing by Martyn Ford, Pages: 367, Publication Date: 1 October 2020

Synopsis: One family. Two missing children. A lifetime of secrets.

Ten-year-old Ethan Clarke’s disappearance gripped the nation. Just as his parents are starting to piece together a life ‘after Ethan’, their world is ripped apart once more when their daughter, Robin, disappears in almost identical circumstances. They’ve lost two children within a decade … and now doubts about their innocence are setting in.

Detective Sam Maguire’s obsession with the first case cost him his own family, but he has unfinished business with the Clarkes. He is convinced that discovering what happened to Ethan holds the key to finding Robin. But what if the Clarkes know more than they’re letting on?

With the world watching eagerly, the clock is ticking for Sam as he embarks on an investigation that forces him to confront his own demons. To uncover the truth, he must follow a trail of devastating deception—but the truth always comes at a cost …

Book Club Fiction

Millicent Glenn’s Last Wish by Tori Whitaker, Pages: 340, Publication Date: 1 October 2020

Synopsis: Three generations of women—and the love, loss, sacrifice, and secrets that can bind them forever or tear them apart.

Millicent Glenn is self-sufficient and contentedly alone in the Cincinnati suburbs. As she nears her ninety-first birthday, her daughter Jane, with whom she’s weathered a shaky relationship, suddenly moves back home. Then Millie’s granddaughter shares the thrilling surprise that she’s pregnant. But for Millie, the news stirs heart-breaking memories of a past she’s kept hidden for too long. Maybe it’s time she shared something, too. Millie’s last wish? For Jane to forgive her.

Sixty years ago Millie was living a dream. She had a husband she adored, a job of her own, a precious baby girl, and another child on the way. They were the perfect family. All it took was one irreversible moment to shatter everything, reshaping Millie’s life and the lives of generations to come.

As Millie’s old wounds are exposed, so are the secrets she’s kept for so long. Finally revealing them to her daughter might be the greatest risk a mother could take in the name of love.

Police Procedural

The Unspoken by Ian K Smith, Pages: 295, Publication Date: 1 October 2020

Synopsis: In this new series from #1 New York Times bestselling author Ian K. Smith, an ex-cop turned private investigator seeks justice on the vibrant, dangerous streets of Chicago.

Former Chicago detective Ashe Cayne is desperate for redemption. After refusing to participate in a police department cover-up involving the death of a young black man, Cayne is pushed out of the force. But he won’t sit quietly on the sidelines: he’s compelled to fight for justice as a private investigator…even if it means putting himself in jeopardy.

When a young woman, Tinsley Gerrigan, goes missing, her wealthy parents from the North Shore hire Cayne to find her. As Cayne looks into her life and past, he uncovers secrets Tinsley’s been hiding from her family. Cayne fears he may never find Tinsley alive.

His worries spike when Tinsley’s boyfriend is found dead—another black man murdered on the tough Chicago streets. Cayne must navigate his complicated relationships within the Chicago PD, leveraging his contacts and police skills to find the missing young woman, see justice done, and earn his redemption.

Contemporary Romance

Roommaids by Sariah Wilson, Pages: 301, Publication Date: 1 October 2020

Synopsis: From bestselling author Sariah Wilson comes a charming romance about living your life one dream at a time.

Madison Huntington is determined to live her dreams. That means getting out from under her family’s wealth and influence by saying no to the family business, her allowance, and her home. But on a teacher’s salary, the real world comes as a rude awakening—especially when she wakes up every morning on a colleague’s couch. To get a place of her own (without cockroaches, mould, or crime scene tape), Madison accepts a position as a roommaid. In exchange for free room and board, all she needs to do is keep her busy roommate’s penthouse clean and his dog company. So what if she’s never washed a dish in her life. She can figure this out, right?

Madison is pretty confident she can fake it well enough that Tyler Roth will never know the difference. The finance whiz is rich and privileged and navigates the same social circles as her parents—but to him she’s just a teacher in need of an apartment. He’s everything Madison has run from, but his kind hearted nature, stomach-fluttering smile, and unexpected insecurities only make her want to get closer. And Tyler is warming to the move.

Rewarding job. Perfect guy. Great future. With everything so right, what could go wrong? Madison is about to find out.

Literary Fiction

A Single Swallow by Zhang Ling, Pages: 299, Publication Date: 1 October 2020

Synopsis: The eagerly awaited English translation of award-winning author Zhang Ling’s epic and intimate novel about the devastation of war, forgiveness, redemption, and the enduring power of love.

On the day of the historic 1945 Jewel Voice Broadcast—in which Emperor Hirohito announced Japan’s surrender to the Allied forces, bringing an end to World War II—three men, flush with jubilation, made a pact. After their deaths, each year on the anniversary of the broadcast, their souls would return to the Chinese village of their younger days. It’s where they had fought—and survived—a war that shook the world and changed their own lives in unimaginable ways. Now, seventy years later, the pledge is being fulfilled by American missionary Pastor Billy, brash gunner’s mate Ian Ferguson, and local soldier Liu Zhaohu.

All that’s missing is Ah Yan—also known as Swallow—the girl each man loved, each in his own profound way.

As they unravel their personal stories of the war, and of the woman who touched them so deeply during that unforgiving time, the story of Ah Yan’s life begins to take shape, woven into view by their memories. A woman who had suffered unspeakable atrocities, and yet found the grace and dignity to survive, she’d been the one to bring them together. And it is her spark of humanity, still burning brightly, that gives these ghosts of the past the courage to look back on everything they endured and remember the woman they lost.

Supernatural Thriller

The Haunting of H G Wells by Robert Masello, Pages: 393, Publication Date: 1 October 2020

Synopsis: A plot against England that even the genius of H. G. Wells could not have imagined.

It’s 1914. The Great War grips the world—and from the Western Front a strange story emerges…a story of St. George and a brigade of angels descending from heaven to fight beside the beleaguered British troops. But can there be any truth to it?

H. G. Wells, the most celebrated writer of his day—author of The Time Machine, The War of the Worlds, The Invisible Man—is dispatched to find out. There, he finds an eerie wasteland inhabited by the living, the dead, and those forever stranded somewhere in between…a no-man’s-land whose unhappy souls trail him home to London, where a deadly plot, one that could turn the tide of war, is rapidly unfolding.

In league with his young love, the reporter and suffragette Rebecca West, Wells must do battle with diabolical forces—secret agents and depraved occultists—to save his sanity, his country, and ultimately the world.

Nonfiction

Welcome to The United States of Anxiety by Jen Lancaster, Pages: 288, Publication Date: 1 October 2020

Synopsis: New York Times bestselling author Jen Lancaster is here to help you chill the hell out.

When did USA become shorthand for the United States of Anxiety? From the moment Americans wake up, we’re bombarded with all-new terrifying news about crime, the environment, politics, and stroke-inducing foods we’ve been enjoying for years. We’re judged by social media’s faceless masses, pressured into maintaining a Pinterest-perfect home, and expected to base our self-worth on retweets, faves, likes, and followers. Our collective FOMO, and the disparity between the ideal and reality, is leading us to spend more and feel worse. No wonder we’re getting twitchy. Save for an Independence Day–style alien invasion, how do we begin to escape from the stressors that make up our days?

Jen Lancaster is here to take a hard look at our elevating anxieties, and with self-deprecating wit and level-headed wisdom, she charts a path out of the quagmire that keeps us frightened of the future and ashamed of our imperfectly perfect human lives. Take a deep breath, and her advice, and you just might get through a holiday dinner without wanting to disown your uncle.

Children’s Picture Book

The Monster on the Block by Sue Ganz-Schmitt, Illustrator: Luke Flowers, Pages: 32 Publication Date: 1 October 2020

Synopsis: Monster is excited to see what kind of creature will move into Vampire’s old house on the block. He even starts practicing his welcome growl for the new neighbour. But when the moving truck pulls up, it’s not a greedy goblin, an ogre, or a dastardly dragon that steps out. Instead, it’s something even more terrifying than Monster could have imagined! Monster quickly rallies the other neighbours to unite against the new guy on the block. But what if the new neighbour isn’t exactly as bad as Monster thinks? Join Monster as he confronts his fears in this charming and light-hearted look at what it means to accept others who are different from us.

*** Which book will you choose? I have no idea which book I’ll choose as there a couple of books that interest me this month. ***

#AmazonFirstReads, #Amazonkindle, #AmazonPrimeMembers, #BookClubFiction, #Books, #ChildrensPictureBook, #ContemporaryFiction, #Kindle, #KindleBooks, #LiteraryFiction, #NonFiction, #PoliceProcedural, #SupernatuarlThriller, #Thriller

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the-canary · 6 years ago

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Bel Ami - B.B (6)

Summary: You had bigger fish to fry in NYC between your new job, living in a new city and old friend – you were sure in over your head, but who’s that cute stranger that keeps helping you out?(Reader/Bucky Barnes)

Prompt: Person A: “Okay, I have something to confess… I like you. I have for the past two years now and it’s been killing me to hold it in this long but I think you deserve to know.” Person B: “You nerd, we’ve been dating for the past two years.

A/N: this is for @sgtjbuccky‘s writing challenge. please welcome to even bigger idiots :)

Feedback is always welcomed.

“Are you telling me that’s the girl Bucky can’t stop thinking of?”

“The exact one.”

“Well, no wonder the date was a failure. You should see the eyes he was making at her.”

“He’s not in love,” Steve remarks as green eyes look at him in disbelief, “His words not mind.”

“That poor deluded bastard.”

You aren’t sure what to think about Bucky and his invasion from before, as the weekend comes closer and he sends you a message to meet near the library close to the Barnes Towers. You are sure it is just meant as a friendship sort of thing and as much as you feel a certain type of disappointment with it all, you are just happy to have Bucky back in your life -- maybe, he’ll bring another dog with him too.

You weren’t sure if in the eleventh hour, you should be freaking about what you should be wearing or enjoying stuffing your face with pizza on the couch and looking for something to watch.

“What do you think that you should be doing right now?” Wanda asks like she knows your inner turmoil, as she watches you hang up from ordering from your favorite pizza place. She is currently putting on some extra earrings, to match her silver heels and red dress for a night out on the town with Viz.

“I think,” you sigh out, “I should forget about this and fantasizing over being Julia Roberts in Pretty Woman again.”

“Richard Gere again?” she questions as she takes a seat across from you and the shitty little thing you call a kitchen countertop.

“Peek Richard Gere,” you correct her as she laughs. You pout for a second, waiting for the second show to drop as Wanda enters mother hen mode.

“If it’s just as friends, just be casual and happy you,” Wanda explains her point-of-view, “If not, maybe you should--”

“I don’t want him like that, Wan,” you whisper as brown eyes give you a sympathetic look.

“I didn’t spend a whole month see you mope over this Borky for you to lie to me,” Wanda fights back, before cupping your cheek so that you could look at her straight in the eyes. You let keep going though you want to correct her and oh so many things, “But, if denial makes it easier for you, and I’ll gladly help with that--”

“But?”

“But,” she starts off once more with a sympathetic smile, “If being around someone hurts you, you can always cut them off. It’s always in your power to do so.”

“I know,” you remark, thinking about why you followed with your plans from moving to New York from Syracuse in the first place, as she smiles and nods once more before the doorbell rings. Maybe, Viz was here to finally pick her up.

She gets up from her place and grabs her bag before looking at you once more: “Enjoy your 90’s movie binge.”

“I’ll try!” you yell back as she disappears through the small hallway and you are left once alone.

Now, you aren’t so sure if you could watch the damn movie without thinking of how much Richard Gere’s character reminded you of one Bucky Barnes, though you weren’t exactly Julia Roberts. Eventually, you decide on watching Top Gun instead and ignoring that denial could be an island of one.

As you binge on old 90’s movies to forget your anxiety over tomorrow, you are completely unaware that there is another person pushing all the details that he loves about New York into the itinerary for tomorrow with a lovestruck look on his face -- though he’ll deny it when asked by Steve or Sam. However, with a certain red-head, it is a completely different story.

“So, I am guessing she’s the reason our date went so bad,” Nat gives him a small smile, though there are no bad feelings behind it, “The one Steve told me about.”

“Stevie doesn’t know what he’s talkin’ about,” Bucky remarks as Natasha gives him a skeptical look, “She’s just a friend.”

Natasha tries her hardest to stop herself from singing the second part to a certain song, as she proceeds to shrug: “Sure, but just remember you’re just going to have the same problem again.”

“I know that,” Bucky remarks in frustration as he pushes a hand through his face, “But, it isn’t like that...I don’t see her in that way.”

Natasha just shakes her head before stating that she has to go back to work and back to seeing Clint, because as least she didn’t have the rich kid problems that came with being one James Buchanan Barnes.

Bucky drives the memory from his head before moving forward with what you guys should have for lunch.

You end up meeting Bucky in the steps of one of older libraries in New York City. The weather is slightly cooler than usual and are falling asleep on the couch after crying over The Green Mile for the what seems like the 20th time, you end up taking a quick shower and picky a breezy open top, a light sweater, and jeans. You aren’t sure what the day is going to entail, but as you see Bucky wearing a simple flannel button up and jeans with Lucas at his side, you can’t help but secretly rejoice over your choice of clothing.

I mean, you didn’t want to seem desperate to the man.

“Morning,” you exclaim with a grin as the large dog perks up for a second, and for a second with those big blue eyes staring at you and you can’t help but hope that Bucky is as well.

“Hey,” Bucky breathe out, as you take a step down and greet Lucas as well. He can’t help but grin at the sight of the dog leaning into your touch before you get up once more and look at him prepared to start the day.

“So, where are we going, oh great tour guide?” you laugh just a little and Bucky can’t help but feel that butterflies in his stomach as his heart speeds up for just a second.

“The Planetarium,” Bucky manages to answer back, as you nod while motioning for Lucas to follow you. The dot agrees to do so with a bark, as Bucky stays in the back.

And as the three of you walk the busy streets of New York, Bucky can’t help but feel like this is going to end up being a very bad idea.

Bucky ends up taking to around Central Park, his favorite bookstore, and a very good pizza place not too far from Madison Square Garden. You also got to know more about Bucky -- about he has gone a few tours when he was younger, how he got connected to the Service Dog Academy he worked with after he came back (as you took Lucas back), and even a little about his family and how he grew up in Brooklyn with his best friend. In exchange, you talked about Wanda and Pietro and how you moved around a lot before settling in Syracuse for the rest of your school, though you didn’t talk much about what lead you to New York.

“Do you like dancing?” Bucky remarks as the afternoon slowly turns into evening and while you had never been the best dancer, you can’t help but want to try it out with Bucky.

“Here and there,” you remark vaguely as Bucky smiles, grabbing your hand and dragging you down the sidewalk.

That’s how you end up at a place called C’mon Everybody.

It’s a quaint little place that seems to be playing a little bit of everything tonight, completely different from that other club where you had meet Bucky before you knew him. However, instead of standing at the sidelines, he quickly grabs a small table, orders drinks, and quickly moves you to the dance floor. You aren’t familiar with some songs, but you do your best with Bucky’s instructions.

It’s a fast twirl of laughs and bad dance moves, as you move from one song to another, quite unsure of where all of this is going but if Bucky is happy you are as well. It hits you like a rock and at that moment, Bucky dips you.

The world pauses and shrinks to the two of you in the darkly lit room, as your eyes meet blue eyes and you realize just how close your face is. Because if you move your face in the right angle, you swear that you could capture his lips with yours and--

That’s when the song comes to an end.

“I have to use the bathroom,” you admit and thus breaking the moment as Bucky lets you go. You run to where the restrooms are indicated to be, as Bucky starts to move towards the table once more. His breathing was a bit heavier than usual, as he tried to calm down whatever adrenaline and emotions he was feeling from that dance.

“Fuck,” he curses to himself, “What the hell was that?”

Bucky knew deep down what it was, everyone had been telling him so for months but now he was finally facing the realization that he really was attracted to you -- he wasn’t sure what to do.

He really couldn’t do anything about it, unless he wanted a Dot incident all over again. Bucky runs a hand through his hair in frustration over his idiocy and just how much he might actually like you. It’s another twenty whole minutes before you come out of the bathroom and by that time he has already called a cab for you.

“W-What?” you manage to stutter out, as Bucky pushes you towards the front of the dance hall. Your heart is jumping in anxiety and fear over what had happened, but you didn’t think that his reaction would have been so negative.

“I-I just realized I have a long day tomorrow,” Bucky remarks trying not to look at your soft lips and watering eyes, “I’m sorry I can’t take you home, but it’s better that way.”

It’s better this way.

The familiar and all too heartbreaking phase causes to you freeze and move forward without another word, as Bucky pushes you into the cab with a weary smile but you aren’t looking at him anymore. You give the man your address and Bucky spots him a hundred before giving you a brief goodbye. He tries to grab your hand but you pull back and say goodnight.

“I’m sorry,” he states, though he isn’t sure if he is saying it for you or for himself as he begins to close the door.

“No,” he hears you whisper, “You aren’t.”

You pull the door to close completely as the cab drives off. You’re left in hurt and confusion as to whether James Barnes was just playing with to begin with or if he just realized he was wasting his time, as you try your hardest not to cry on the way back home.

Bucky is left standing there on the sidewalk, unsure of what to do next but he knows everything is more fucked up than it should be now.

#salinaswritingchallenge #james buchanan barnes #Bucky Barnes #james barnes #james bucky barnes x reader #james buchanan barnes x reader #bucky barnes au #bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes modern au #bucky barnes angst #bucky barnes fanfiction #bucky barnes fanfic #bucky barnes fluff #bucky barnes fic #bucky barnes fan fic #series: bel ami #fabiola trying to write

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nicolemagolan · 6 years ago

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Books I Read In March 2019

This was a month of 3 stars reads. A range of ‘eh pretty good’ to ‘meh pretty okay’...3 star reads are always weird to review, because I have no passionate argument to why you should/shouldn’t read it. It was okay. It was entertaining. But I’ve probably forgotten most of it already.

I dived into a few different genres; horror, fantasy, science fiction, and dystopian. And of course, I had to spend some time in the Star Wars galaxy. If you’re interested in my in-depth thoughts, keep reading!

Dracula by Bram Stoker

3/5 stars

I wasn't sure how I would feel about Dracula, as I went in with a particular set of expectations due to the story’s popularity -- and I honestly didn’t think I would enjoy it. But it turned out to be a highly entertaining and engaging story. It has a gothic and spooky atmosphere which it is of course famous for, but it wasn’t as focused on the horror as I feared. I was surprised and intrigued to find that Dracula himself is not the main character. He is a figure shrouded in mystery that brings together the various cast of characters. The story is told through journal entries and letters, and the format is well-utilized. Sometimes this kind of thing can slow the pacing or drag on, but here it works well, slipping smoothly from character to character. I loved the first half of the book; the build up of the mystery surrounding Dracula was excellent. Unfortunately, once the main conflict was resolved, the book continued by rehashing the same plot line. That crisis is over? Well then lets have another one that is exactly the same and no longer has tension. Great! This time it was boring and frustrating. The damsel in distress trope was used to an unbearable extent. The long-awaited climax of the novel was over in approximately half a paragraph. I had to read it three times to be sure I hadn't missed something; I was so confused that it had ended just like that. Very disappointing. The chapters leading up to the big final confrontation felt like filler in comparison. This did not, however, lessen my enjoyment of the first half and particularly the first 50 pages of Dracula. I'm glad I read it. If it intrigues you, the go right ahead!

Spinning Silver by Naomi Novik

3/5 stars

With well woven narratives and atmospheric settings, Spinning Silver is an enchanting loose retelling of Rumpelstiltskin -- one of my favourite fairy tales. The way the elements of the original story were incorporated was quite clever and unexpected.

But here’s the thing about Rumpelstiltskin: it’s real short. And this novel is hefty. The story here is spread thin. While I enjoyed the first half of the book, at the half way point the story began to drag, and because I hadn’t been able to connect to the characters, soon I lost interest entirely.

Neverworld Wake by Marisha Pessl

3/5 stars

Neverworld Wake is a fast paced, emotional ride. We follow a group of teens who used to be close friends but parted ways after one of them died in mysterious circumstances. They get stuck in a time loop, and their only way out is to uncover the truth of what happened the night their friend died. In typical small-town murder fashion, each character is hidjing secrets and ulterior motives. I loved the way it unravelled; it constantly kept me guessing. The science fiction aspect was not sidelined, nor did it take over the story, and I found that it was balanced very well with the drama. The plot is driven by the main character, her choices, her discoveries, her emotions. She was well-realised and I enjoyed reading through her voice. The other characters, however, came off a little flat. There wasn't a whole lot of description in this book, which made the plot move very quickly, but I had no idea what anyone looked like or how they functioned. The main character's relationship with each of them was distant, which added to the detachment I felt. The ending was handled well in terms of pacing and dramatic effect...but it was pretty predictable. Left me like, yup okay. It didn't have that emotional punch I was waiting for. A shame, but overall this was a great read. Definitely recommend if you want a quick and fun read!

The Invisible Library by Genevieve Cogman

DNF (Did Not Finish)

The concept of The Invisible Library is absolutely brilliant. Time travelling, dimension hopping librarians collecting rare manuscript from all over the universe.

This literally sounds like the nerdy book of my dreams.

But unfortunately, I only made it 150 pages in before I had to put it down. I just wasn’t enjoying it at all, and reading it quickly became a chore. The writing style was info-dumpy and extra-wordy, making it hard to get a grasp on the setting. The characters failed to capture me, and the story was meandering. I found no reason to continue.

Perhaps this book had a great ending. Alas, I will never know.

Star Wars: Rebel Rising by Beth Revis

3/5 stars

Star Wars audiobooks are always a treat. The production quality is top notch, and Rebel Rising is no exception; great music, narration, and sound effects.

The story was one I didn’t know I wanted: a prequel’s prequel, this follows a young Jyn Erso, the lead character of the film Rogue One: A Star Wars Story. I’m not the biggest fan of RO, namely because the characters are flat and boring. I don’t really want to have required reading before seeing a film; both should stand on their own (a problem I’ve had with many of the Star Wars novels). Remarkably, in this case they do.

Jyn is a wonderfully realised character and her arc does not pull punches. She really goes through a lot. It’s pretty brutal. Her view of the world evolves with the story, leading her to the point where she is in RO. It was a fascinating journey.

Still, I can’t give this book more then a solid 3 stars because the romance, and original side characters all got on my nerves. They were not engaging, and pulled me right out of the story.

But on the plus side, I think this book does add depth to the film while managing to stand entirely on its own.

The Walking Dead, Issue #189: Lines Are Drawn by Robert Kirkman, Cliff Rathburn (Illustrator), Stefano Gaudiano (Illustrator), Charlie Adlard (Illustrator), and Dave Stewart (Illustrator)

3/5 stars

The Walking Dead comics keep trucking along. This was a better issue than the last, with the current ‘commenwealth’ story line finally feeling like it might go somewhere.

Honestly, I don’t know why I’m still bothering to read this series. I’m no longer invested in the world or the characters. I guess out of obligation -- it’s been a part of my life for so very long. Though, I’ll give this issue props for including a touching moment between Rick and Carl. Those sorts of moments are what built my love for this series, and it’s good to know they’re still tucked in there.

I have a few other books I’ve already started, and so far so good. I decided to reread an old favourite and let me tell you, it was a great idea. Come back in a months time to hear about it! Here’s hoping next month will have a few higher rated reads!

#books #booklr #reading wrap up #reading #amreading #book review #dracula #spinning silver #neverworld wake #the invisible library #star wars: rebel rising #the walking dead comics #twdc #bookworm

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socialyy-marketing · 3 years ago

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The Biggest Risk Is Not Taking One: 15 Risks Everyone Needs To Take In Life

Life is much like the game of poker. Players place bets and gambles to win the jackpot. Although luck and skill also play a role to carry the day, the most crucial factor in winning is the willingness to take risks.

Risks are present in our everyday lives. No one can escape it. In fact, you could just walk down the street and suddenly get into an accident, or you can fall ill at any moment. These are everyday risks that no one can stay away from, but there are also risks you can take by choice.

In circumstances where you get to decide whether to take the risk or not, keep in mind that there is merit in saying “yes” despite the possibility of failure. Risk-taking does not only exposes a person to dozens of positive outcomes beyond the comfort zone, but it also improves self-esteem. It helps in letting go of the fear of failing.

It’s okay to be afraid and hesitate, especially when things can get a bit messy but always remember that Kiyosaki Robert has said, “The biggest risk a person can take is do nothing.” Taking risks can possibly bring you pain when things go wrong, but it can also make your life worthwhile when they go right.

Don’t miss these 15 risks you should take in life:

1. Speak up for what you believe in

Sometimes, silence may truly be golden, but other times, you need to voice out your conceptions and notion even there are chances that it would be too controversial, or incorrect. Still, don’t be contented to stand on the sidelines because you are afraid of how people would react.

Speak up for what you believe in, even when there are people who are hostile towards your viewpoint. You can either prove your point and convince them or learn something valuable if what you believe in was wrong.

What matters is that you have articulated your point of view. You can’t fully live your life without expressing your perspectives boldly.

2. Pursue your passion

Have you counted the number of opportunities you have missed for being a cowardly fraidy cat? Unfortunately, quite a lot of people don’t run after their dreams because the other road that’s waiting for them looks more convenient and easier. They go for something that is within their reach instead of following their nearly impossible dreams and passion.

If you are one of them, it’s not too late to pursue your dreams that make your heart race. We are only given one life, and there’s no other life waiting after death, so better go for your passion while you still have time.

3. Care about others

Allowing people to enter your life after a faded friendship and bad breakup can truly be a scary thing. It is frightening to give others an entry pass in your life when you know there’s a big chance of getting your heartbreak once again.

But you have to take the risk of having someone to care about again. Don’t let your mind wander in the possibility of future heartbreak, and just enjoy the beauty of having someone close to you.

Click here to read more: (https://www.socialyy.com/motivation/15-risks-everyone-should-take-in-life/)

#Success #Fail #Life #Risks #Succeed

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joemoshe · 3 years ago

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15 Risks Everyone Needs To Take In Life

Don’t miss these 15 risks you should take in life:

1. Speak up for what you believe in

What matters is that you have articulated your point of view. You can’t fully live your life without expressing your perspectives boldly.

2. Pursue your passion

3. Care about others

But you have to take the risk of having someone to care about again. Don’t let your mind wander in the possibility of future heartbreak, and just enjoy the beauty of having someone close to you.

4. Learn and try out new things

All too often, we let fear of the things unseen hinder us. There is so much more to explore in life and trying out new things not only helps in vanquishing anxieties but also gives us a chance to learn and expand our minds.

Start learning how to surf, play balls, or rock climbing. Doing incredible things without embracing some risk is impossible. If you want to broaden your view of the world, eradicate all expectations of the worst and jump out of your comfort zone and do things you’ve never done before.

At the end of the day, you might find that the things you’re most scared of, are actually the things that will bring you the best memories. Nothing beats the thrill of a new experience.

5. Watch a show you usually avoid

There is nothing wrong with watching action and bloody movies for the pleasure of exhilarating fights. However, if you watch too many such shows or films, you might miss out on something important.

Try watching documentaries where you can gain substantial information from, or comedies to brighten up your day. By doing so, you might find inspiration to endeavor new things in the future.

6. Create art to put on your wall

Is there a big spot in your wall that you have been wanting to be occupied with artwork, but haven’t found the perfect piece that fits? Try painting some art for yourself. You don’t need to be a professional artist to paint, consider it as expressing yourself.

Although your piece may not end up looking the way you expected it to be, it could also end up great for a portion of the price of a professional-made painting.

7. Take a new fitness class

Start taking fitness classes a little different from what you’ve already done before. If you’re used to working out, try yoga. If you’re not new to yoga, try other weirder fitness classes like underwater spin class or aerial yoga class.

8. Fail to succeed

The downside of taking chances is the possibility of failure, but don’t let it stop you. If you badly want to start something — a business or any project — push it through even if there’s a chance that it may come to nothing.

In Silicon Valley, big companies promote their employee to hire people who dared to start their own company that later becomes bankrupt. This apparently shows us that people who take risks, even when they failed, have good opportunities to welcome them when things don’t go in the expected direction.

9. Launch an imperfect product

If you wait for your product to be perfected before launching them to the public, you’re bound to fail. No matter how much you disagree, no one really creates a perfect product on the first try. You need to launch it first, see results, and review the masses to know areas that need improvement.

10. Run the risk of losing friends

While friendships can be wonderful, they can also be binding. For instance, you observe that a person needs to improve himself, may it be in attitude or another aspect. Telling it to someone you are not fond of is quite easy because you’re not shackled that it might offend them.

But telling the truth to a friend or loved one is another story. You think of whether you will hurt them if you tell the truth. If you are in this kind of circumstance, tell them in a way they will understand. Gently and respectfully.

For all the tips - Read here the full article

#motivation #hustle #entrepreneur #entreprenuership #mistakes

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news-monda · 4 years ago

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yhwhrulz · 3 years ago

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Today's Daily Encounter Succeeding With Humility “In the same way, you who are younger must acceptthe authority of the elders. And all of you, dress yourselves in humility asyou relate to one another, for ‘God opposes the proud but gives grace to thehumble.’"1Robert Roberts writes about a fourth-grade class inwhich the teacher introduced a game called "balloon stomp." A balloonwas tied to every child's leg, and the object of the game was to pop everyoneelse's balloon while protecting one's own. The last person with an intactballoon would win. Thefourth graders in Roberts' story entered into the spirit of the game withvigor. Balloons were relentlessly targeted and destroyed. A few of the childrenclung to the sidelines like wallflowers at a middle school dance, but theirballoons were doomed just the same. The entire battle was over in a matter ofseconds, leaving only one balloon inflated. Its owner was, of course, the mostdisliked kid in the class. It's hard to really win at a game like balloonstomp. In order to complete your mission, you have to be pushy, rude, andoffensive. Robertsgoes on to write that a second class was introduced to the same game. Only thistime it was a class of children with special needs. They were given the sameexplanation as the first class, and the signal to begin was given. But the gameproceeded very differently. The children may have understood the instructions alittle differently, but one idea that got through was that the balloons weresupposed to be popped. So, it was the balloons, not the other players, thatwere viewed as enemies. Instead of fighting each other, they began helping eachother pop balloons. One little girl knelt down and held her balloon carefullyin place, like a holder for a field goal kicker. A little boy stomped it flat.Then he knelt down and held his balloon for her. It went on like this forseveral minutes until all the balloons were vanquished, and everybody cheered.Everybody won.2 Whogot the game right, and who got the game wrong? In our world, including somechurch environments, we tend to think of another person's success as one lessopportunity for us to succeed. There can only be one top dog, one top banana.If we ever find ourselves in that desired position, we fight to maintain ourhold on it. Many fail to enjoy prolonged success because the people in chargehave this "balloon stomp" mentality. With Christians, however, therules should change. Jesus Christ takes the highest position. Our mission is toserve him and serve others. Always looking for the wellbeing of others, morethan our own. In order to succeed in our faith journey and lives in general, wemust learn to celebrate shared success with humility and work for each other,instead of against each other. Suggested prayer: Dear God, keep me from fallinginto the harmful mentality of thinking of myself more than others. Thank youfor the privilege of being able to serve you, while I serve others. Remove allpride from my heart and give me humility and grace. Thank you for hearing andanswering my prayer. In Jesus’ name, amen.1 Peter 5:5 (NLT). www.sermoncentral.com NOTE: If you would like to accept God's forgiveness for all your sins and His invitation for a full pardon Click on: http://www.actsweb.org/invitation.php. Or if you would like to re-commit your life to Jesus Christ, please click on http://www.actsweb.org/decision.php to note this. * * * * * * * Daily Encounter is published at no charge by ACTS International, a non-profit organization, and made possible through the donations of interested friends. Donations can be sent at: http://www.actscom.com ACTS International P.O. Box 73545 San Clemente, California 92673-0119 U.S.A. Phone: 949-940-9050 http://www.actsweb.org Copyright (c) 2016 by ACTS International. When copying or forwarding include the following: "Daily Encounter by Richard (Dick) Innes (c) 2016 ACTS International.

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auburnfamilynews · 4 years ago

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We begin with one of the more thrilling Iron Bowls and continue on!

A couple days ago, we hit you with some of the greatest games of Pat Dye’s tenure, honoring some of the fantastic memories that he brought to Auburn during his time as head coach. Today, we get you some more from the latter half of the 1980s.

1986 IRON BOWL - AUBURN 21, ALABAMA 17

After two straight Iron Bowl defeats, during both of which Dye admitted he got too cocky, Auburn finished the 80s with a vengeance against the Tide, winning four straight. It all began with the 1986 game, which turned out to be one of the most thrilling in series history.

Alabama controlled the first three quarters, building a 17-7 lead to start the final period of play. Dye’s Tigers would turn on the charm for the last fifteen minutes, as Brent Fullwood scored to start the fourth quarter and pull within a field goal. After holding the Alabama offense ineffective, Auburn got the ball at its own 33 with about five minutes left to play in the game.

The Tigers’ final drive culminated in typical nerve-wracking Auburn fashion. Jeff Burger had to hit Trey (“Ollllllllllle Reliable” according to Keith Jackson) Gainous for a fourth down conversion midway through, but when the Tigers lined up for what would end up being the game-winner, it was anything but smooth.

Auburn’s final play originally called for Scott Bolton to be the reverse man, but he never made it into the ballgame, and the play call took way too long to get relayed into the huddle. Lawyer Tillman ran out wide right, barely got set as the ball was snapped, and took the pitch from Tim Jesse out of the backfield. He used a big block from Vincent Jones and slipped into the endzone with 32 seconds left to play. 21-17 Auburn. Watching the replay, you can see the Tillman was trying to call timeout before the play started, but he just ended up having to run the reverse, and it all worked out.

Watch the entire final drive below:

1987 GEORGIA TECH - AUBURN 20, GEORGIA TECH 10

A casual viewing of a historical schedule might tell you that a 20-10 win over a 2-9 Georgia Tech team was a bit of a snoozer. Not a blowout, but Tech probably never threatened, and Auburn did a little sleepwalk but got away unscathed. Not so!

Auburn entered Atlanta as the 5th-ranked team in America at 4-0-1, while Tech was on the struggle bus. The Jackets led late into the fourth quarter, as Auburn reached the red zone. You can watch the go-ahead bullet from Burger to Lawyer Tillman below. The touchdown gave the Tigers a 14-10 lead with just seconds remaining, but they weren’t done yet.

What’s more amazing than Tillman’s fantastic catch in that moment was Aundray Bruce’s entire afternoon. He picked off three passes, and had a forced fumble and recovered fumble. In an effort to make the score a little bit more distant, his final interception of the day resulted in a pick six as time expired, and the Tigers walked out of Bobby Dodd with a win. Enjoy some Jim Fyffe.

1988 FLORIDA - AUBURN 16, FLORIDA 0

There’s really nothing super special about this game in of itself, but it encapsulated what the 1988 Auburn Tigers were all about. Pat Dye’s eighth team might have been the best of all his squads, but they slipped up in Baton Rouge, otherwise they’d have played Notre Dame for the national championship. Instead, a tough loss to Florida State occurred in the Sugar Bowl.

Defense was the name of the game in 1988, and Auburn was masterful at it, allowing just 92 points all season long. After the 7-6 loss at LSU, the Tigers went on a revenge tour, shutting out the next three opponents on the schedule. The final date in that three-game stretch came in Gainesville, where Auburn limited the Gators to just 116 yards (13 on the ground) and blanked Florida, who played without Emmitt Smith.

Here’s how important the shutout is... it’s the last time that Florida failed to score. 32 years ago. It’s the only shutout for Florida since 1982, and the only one at home since 1979. While the 1988 Auburn Tigers may have been Pat Dye’s best team, the offense left a little to be desired, as the two losses came by a combined score of 20-13. A smidge better on offense, and the Tigers are likely a national champion in 1988.

1989 FLORIDA - AUBURN 10, FLORIDA 7

Here’s a trend — Auburn liked to beat Florida in the late 1980s, especially after getting Robert McGinty-ed and Kerwin Bell-ed in the early part of the decade.

After the only shutout in Gainesville in the last 40 years, Florida came into Jordan-Hare Stadium the next season looking for payback. They almost got it, using a stout defensive effort to limit Auburn to just three points through the first 59 minutes and change.

Needing a touchdown to overtake Florida, Reggie Slack and Shane Wasden went to work. On third down deep in the north end of the stadium, Wasden ran down the sideline into the end zone and discovered that nobody covered him. Running back to the huddle, he relayed that key piece of information to his quarterback, and so Auburn ran the same play on fourth and ten.

Emmitt Smith nearly came to Auburn, and instead he never beat Auburn.

1989 IRON BOWL - AUBURN 30, ALABAMA 20

There have been tomes written about this game already, but it could very well be the most important game in Auburn history. There are some others that may be more memorable in terms of the actual action on the field, but none are so impactful as The First Time Ever.

Pat Dye had been trying to turn the Iron Bowl into an on-campus game, but there was a contract with Legion Field through 1988. Dye reportedly told Bear Bryant “We’ll play it in Auburn in 1989, then.”

It was no secret that playing in Birmingham at Legion Field never really afforded Auburn a home field advantage, even in the years when the Tigers wore blue. When the dust settled on years of negotiations, Auburn had gained the upper hand by winning the on-campus location for its 1989 ‘home’ game, and agreeing to go back to Birmingham for one final ‘home’ appearance in 1991. Originally, officials wanted those two dates to be flipped, and it’s fortunate they weren’t. The 1989 Auburn teams was significantly better than its 1991 counterpart, and losing the first Iron Bowl at Jordan-Hare wouldn’t have been any fun.

Instead, Auburn welcomed an Alabama team in the hunt for the national championship on December 2nd, 1989, and scored on the opening drive. Despite going down 10-7 at halftime, the Tigers ripped off 20 straight points in the second half, opening up a comfortable 27-10 advantage. Alabama pulled within a score, but a late Win Lyle field goal iced the 30-20 win. Auburn took a share of the SEC Championship, and Alabama got taken down by Miami in the Sugar Bowl as the Canes won the national title.

If you have nearly three hours, enjoy the entire game with Jim Fyffe’s audio as well as the CBS intro of the game with Jim Nantz.

Dye’s locker room speech after the game is immortal. I don’t know how you pack that many timeless quotes into one short passage.

1990 FLORIDA STATE - AUBURN 20, FSU 17

This was Dye’s last stand. Auburn entered the 1990 season riding high on a share of the 1989 conference title, Auburn ran out to a 4-0-1 record to start the 90s, and welcomed FSU to town as the #5 team in America.

The Seminoles fell behind early, but grabbed a 17-7 lead in the second half. A Jim Von Wyl field goal cut the margin to one score, and Bobby Bowden got cocky. After the Fumblerooskie worked against Clemson with Leroy Butler in 1988, it had become almost synonymous with the Seminoles. He tried it again on a third and 17, and....

...it failed. Auburn got the ball, Stacy Danley tied the game, and then Auburn’s defense stood tall again in the final minute when they sacked Casey Weldon on a potential go-ahead drive. Instead of just going down, Weldon stumbled and bumbled for a 22-yard loss, putting the ball at the FSU 41 and turning the ball back to the Tigers. Auburn moved just a little bit for field goal range and Von Wyl kicked the game-winner to send the Noles home and give the Tigers a 20-17 win.

Unfortunately, two weeks later Auburn got Spurrier-ed for the first time, as Florida won a 48-7 laugher in Gainesville, and the Tigers limped home to finish 1990. It would be Dye’s last winning season as a head coach.

...

There you have it. Just a few of the finest outings in Pat Dye’s Auburn tenure. We’ll miss you, Coach.

from College and Magnolia - All Posts https://www.collegeandmagnolia.com/2020/6/7/21283118/pat-dyes-greatest-games-pt-ii

#IFTTT #Blogger #auburn #auburn fast #wareagle #AuburnFamilyNews #war eagle #sec #football news #aubu

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seuzz · 7 years ago

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Three Pieces of Advice from Lawrence Block (3)

One

Two

Three: Find your affinity ...

... and grit your teeth during the search.

Possibly (though this isn't a given) there is a genre, a sub-genre, a style ... a kind of thing ... out there that is perfectly suited to your talents. It will leap upon you when you find it. You’ll know it when you catch yourself murmuring, "I could have written that."

The kid who pleads on the sidelines during the big game, "Put me in, Coach! I can do this! I know I can!" That will be you when you find it.

It's like character-identification: The feeling not just that you know a character, but that you are that character, that you have had those thoughts and emotions and motives, and that you would have done exactly what they have done.

In this case it's author-identification. You recognize in the writer the same or similar things that you've got. Background, experience, point-of-view, sensibility ... commonalities so great that you could have acted as he did -- which is to say, you could have written that book, or one very like it.

It might be an identification with a particular author, but it might be with the author-type that works in the genre. Not just with H. P. Lovecraft (let us say), but with Frank Belknap Long and E. Hoffman Price and Robert Leslie Bellem.

To find your affinities you must read a wide spectrum of literature, of all genres and time periods, and of all qualities. Read with charity and hope -- for your own sake.

For you must also be prepared for a terrible shock, if your affinities do not match your self-image. You may be horrified to discover that though you fancy yourself another David Foster Wallace, it is Emile C. Tepperman who gets your motor thrumming.

Don't feel stricken if you suffer such a mismatch. If the affinity is there, you will love and enjoy working within what you have found.

If you let yourself, that is. Don't cripple yourself by letting self-conceit cut you off from the talent that has been given you.

#writing advice

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dillhome69-blog · 6 years ago

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The Bear’s Den, November 26, 2018

BEAR DOWN, CHICAGO BEARS, BEAR DOWN!!!!

BEARRRSSSS

Campbell: Vikings safety Harrison Smith fined for illegal hit that injured Mitch Trubisky - Chicago Tribune - The NFL fined Vikings safety Harrison Smith for his illegal hit that injured Bears quarterback Mitch Trubisky’s right shoulder on Nov. 18.

Mayer: Daniel’s strong work ethic pays dividends - ChicagoBears.com - Backup quarterback Chase Daniel prepares like he’s going to start every week, and that approach helped him lead the Bears to a key win over the Lions despite not taking any full-speed reps leading up to the game.

Mayer: Ditka recovering from minor heart attack - ChicagoBears.com - Bears legend Mike Ditka is recovering from a minor heart attack in a Florida hospital, according to his agent, Steve Mandell.

Medina: Bears Defensive Coordinator Vic Fangio Expected to Get Serious Interest as a Head-Coaching Candidate - Bleacher Nation - Vic Fangio interviewed to replace John Fox last winter and could get more interviews at the end of this season.

Medina: Bears Re-Sign Defensive Back John Franklin III to Practice Squad - Bleacher Nation - Let’s keep an eye on John Franklin III, whose development could be something worth monitoring down the line.

Morrissey: The great debate - The 1985 Bears defense vs. the 2018 Bears defense - Sun Times - You probably think this is a pathetic attempt to attract more readers, more eyeballs and more clicks. You couldn’t be more wrong about the media! Ken's Note: I'm not even going to think about this until after the Bears have won a Super Bowl. Once we have won another one, then we can talk about D's.

Finley: Vikings' Harrison Smith fined for hit that hurt Bears QB Mitch Trubisky - Sun Times - The Vikings safety was docked $10,026 for unnecessary roughness

Potash: From 19-45 dysfunction to 8-3 playoff contention - How the Bears turned it around - Sun Times - Hiring Nagy looks like a masterstroke. He not only is developing Trubisky ... but seems to have the right touch as a modern-era NFL head coach.

Legendary Chicago Bears football coach Mike Ditka hospitalized in Florida after suffering heart attack - Sun Times - Ditka was playing golf shortly before going to the hospital, a source told Sun-Times columnist Michael Sneed. He is resting after getting a pacemaker.

Finley: Bears' Eddie Jackson 'could be playing some WR' but is dominating at safety - Sun Times - He's fast becoming one of the sport’s great ball-hawking safeties and a candidate to make his first Pro Bowl — if not All-Pro team — this year.

Kenney: Dwyane Wade on being Bears fan, Mitch Trubisky, Khalil Mack - Sun Times - Dwyane Wade has never been shy about his Bears fandom — just turn to his Twitter timeline on game days.

Wiederer: 'This is our moment' Bears using belief and unity as fuel toward a surprise championship run - Chicago Tribune - The Bears are on a five-game winning streak and coming off a character-revealing 23-16 victory over the Lions. The team's confidence is swelling and players like Danny Trevathan and Akiem Hicks point to their teammates' drive and unity as a catalyst.

Biggs: Lions succeeded in keeping Khalil Mack in check, but when Bears OLB was getting a rest, defense showed holes - Chicago Tribune - The Lions did a nice job preventing Khalil Mack from wrecking their offense, but Detroit QB Matthew Stafford wasn't able to push the ball downfield with any regularity. What did show up was big gains for the Lions on the seven snaps Mack was on the sideline for. Ken’s Note: One of these holes showed that the Bears missed Aaron Lynch, who was out with a concussion, big time.

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POLISH SAUSAGE

Monsters of the Midway Comic Strip - One Step Closer - ChicagoBears.com - Follow along as we tell the story of the Monsters of the Midway defending Chicago from a weekly nemesis drawn from the 2018 schedule.

KNOW THY ENEMY

Sunday Night wrap-up: Kirk Cousins leads Vikings to win – ProFootballTalk - Kirk Cousins may never be as good as Aaron Rodgers. But for a night he was good enough, and won a night game for a change. The Vikings quarterback was sharp in their 24-17 win over the Packers, earning his money and putting his team in good position for the final month of the season.

Packers collapse again in 24-17 loss to Vikings, ending Green Bay’s playoff hopes - Acme Packing Company - The Packers aren’t mathematically eliminated, but they may as well be after another sloppy, ugly loss on Sunday night.

Minnesota Vikings 24, Green Bay Packers 17: Vikings get huge NFC North victory - Daily Norseman - This is a big boost to the purple’s playoff chances

Giants-Eagles final score: Another Giants meltdown, 25-22 - Big Blue View - Another Jake Elliott dagger field goal. Another Eagles comeback.

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lifejustgotawkward · 8 years ago

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365 Day Movie Challenge (2017) - #78: What Ever Happened to Baby Jane? (1962) - dir. Robert Aldrich

Just in time for the Ryan Murphy mini-series “Feud: Bette and Joan,” last week I watched the classic thriller What Ever Happened to Baby Jane?, the film whose collaboration between stars Bette Davis and Joan Crawford forms the basis for the new TV show. If you have enjoyed the work of Davis and Crawford from the 1930s, 40s and 50s but you are not familiar with their later contributions to horror cinema, Baby Jane is where it all began. The film isn’t perfect, but it’s definitely an experience worth having.

In 1917, Baby Jane Hudson (played by Julie Allred) is a popular vaudeville performer who charms audiences by singing such cute-but-creepy tunes as “I’ve Written a Letter to Daddy.” (Aldrich never makes it clear whether Jane actually had an incestuous relationship with her father or if the obsession with Daddy’s love is all in her head, but perhaps author Henry Farrell made the nature of their bond clearer in the original Baby Jane novel.) Jane’s father lavishes all of his attention on his spoiled-rotten daughter, while her older sister Blanche (Gina Gillespie) stands at the sidelines with their mother (Anne Barton). Blanche vows that one day she’ll have her moment in the sun, and indeed that time arrives in the 1930s.

In 1935, Blanche Hudson is one of the biggest stars in Tinseltown, while Jane is also an actress who has a movie contract that she can’t get out of; there is a stipulation in Blanche’s studio contract that Jane has to have an active career too. Some insiders (including one played by Aldrich favorite Wesley Addy) assume that Blanche keeps Jane’s career afloat out of sisterly love, while others speculate that Jane (who is considered box office poison) is being punished by Blanche, forced to keep making failing films while Blanche’s success grows. Then a shocking tragedy happens after a late-night party: after driving to their shared home in the Hollywood Hills, Blanche is permanently injured while opening to the gates to the driveway. Someone – Jane, as everyone assumes – put their foot on the brakes and slammed the car forward into Blanche, turning her into a paraplegic. The studio hushes up the incident (out of loyalty to Blanche) so that Jane isn’t arrested, but Blanche and Jane’s careers are over.

Fast-forward to 1962. Jane (Bette Davis) and Blanche (Joan Crawford) are still living in their big, creepy house, with Blanche dependent on Jane for food and care since Blanche can’t leave her bedroom on the second floor. It is apparent that Jane has serious mental problems; she thinks she is still as famous as she was forty-five years earlier, still singing her old songs, playing with her “Baby Jane” dolls and even wearing the same braided blonde hair and heavily caked-on stage makeup. As the film progresses, we see Jane’s paranoia and cruelty toward Blanche intensify, including starving Blanche, taking away her phone and beating her when she crawls downstairs and tries to call a doctor. Jane eventually becomes so deluded that her homicidal capacity for violence exists simultaneously with a belief that she is a totally innocent child who would never harm a fly - a victim of other people’s strange and confusing aggressions.

Despite being impressively photographed by DP Ernest Haller, What Ever Happened to Baby Jane? has not aged nearly as well as the standard-setter in the psychological thriller genre from two years earlier, Psycho. I’m not even sure if Baby Jane is as good as Aldrich’s next horror-thriller, Hush...Hush, Sweet Charlotte, another vehicle starring Bette Davis that I thought was excellent (although I haven’t seen it in about ten years, so I’m due for another screening). It makes sense that the Academy granted Davis an Oscar nomination for her work in Baby Jane, a juicy part that she really sank her teeth into; I find it odd, however, that Victor Buono received a Best Supporting Actor Oscar nomination for his role as Edwin Flagg, the obviously gay pianist hired by Jane to accompany her in the show she dreams of putting on in Vegas, or wherever else she thinks a revival might happen. The Edwin character is interesting because the dynamic between him and his mother seems just as twisted as the one between Jane and Blanche, but ultimately Buono doesn’t have enough scenes, or important actions within the plot, to justify the actor receiving accolades for his work. I would have rather seen Maidie Norman win awards for her performance as the Hudsons’ housekeeper, Elvira, the only person in the world who truly cares about Blanche’s well-being.

In spite of some of my gripes, What Ever Happened to Baby Jane? is required viewing as a vital pop-cultural document. Besides its status as the landmark pairing of Davis and Crawford, the film also tells a compelling story about what might happen when celebrity clashes with mental illness and also with changing times and/or the unstable whims of the public (everyone has forgotten Baby Jane, but Blanche is remembered especially well thanks to a TV station that starts playing her classic 30s films, a fact that infuriates Jane). Davis and Crawford also had their own battles on- and off-set, fighting with each other but also generally dealing with the difficulties of maintaining their careers despite being women of a certain age. These overlapping complexities make Baby Jane exactly the sort of production that I would love to teach in a film history class, assuming that one day I get the opportunity.

#365 day movie challenge 2017 #what ever happened to baby jane?#what ever happened to baby jane #1962 #1960s #60s #robert aldrich #old hollywood #bette davis #joan crawford #henry farrell #victor buono #maidie norman #ernest haller

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bountyofbeads · 5 years ago

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Senate impeachment trial begins with rancor over witnesses and new evidence about Trump’s Ukraine dealings

By Seung Min Kim, Rachael Bade, Mike DeBonis and Toluse Olorunnipa | Published January 16 at 7:32 PM EST |

Washington Post | Posted Jan 16, 2020 |

The third impeachment trial in U.S. history officially began Thursday amid a swirl of new allegations about President Trump’s dealings with Ukraine, which several Republicans rushed to downplay as they dismissed Democrats’ calls for further investigation.

Lev Parnas, a former associate of Trump’s personal lawyer Rudolph W. Giuliani, has alleged that Trump knew of his role in the effort to dig up dirt in Ukraine that could benefit the president politically — the central issue in House Democrats’ case for removing the president from office — and this week provided Congress with documents to buttress his claims. Trump, who has appeared in several pictures with Parnas, denied knowing him on Thursday.

Republican lawmakers appeared unswayed by the new information, focusing on attacking the Democratic-led investigation in the House for not uncovering the evidence before sending the impeachment articles to the Senate.

“Look, no Republicans were for the inquiry to begin with so why would we be under any sort of obligation to feel like we need to complete the work that we never even agreed should’ve begun in the first place?” Sen. Rand Paul (R-Ky.) said of the House investigation.

That sentiment was expressed by several other GOP lawmakers, many of whom said they did not want to hear from new witnesses or further investigate Trump’s conduct during the trial.

Sen. James Lankford (R-Okla.) said it is the responsibility of the House, not the Senate, to gather evidence and present a case for impeachment.

“As a juror, I’m not fishing, looking for more information on this,” he said. “I’m trying to respond to what the House is sending over and what they’re doing.”

The chorus of Republicans unwilling to consider additional evidence served as an indication that Democrats will face an uphill climb in their attempts to further build a case against Trump as the Senate trial plays out. The impeachment charges center on the allegation that the president withheld military aid and a White House meeting to pressure Ukraine to investigate his political rivals, including former vice president Joe Biden and his son Hunter.

Democrats accused their Republican colleagues of turning a blind eye to incriminating evidence and staging a political coverup to protect the president.

They seized on the allegations made by Parnas in television interviews Wednesday that placed Trump at the center of the alleged plot to solicit political interference by Ukraine.

“The American people have seen allegations, and they’re allegations,” House Speaker Nancy Pelosi (D-Calif.) said Thursday. “We need to see more evidence that would be contained in the documentation. This is just another avoiding of the facts and the truths on their part.”

Democrats said their case was also bolstered Thursday by a report from a congressional watchdog agency that found the White House violated federal law when it withheld security aid to Ukraine last year.

The Government Accountability Office, a nonpartisan agency that reports to Congress, found that the administration broke a law that governs how the executive branch disburses money approved by Congress. The White House disputed the findings, which carry no potential criminal penalties. But Democrats seized on the report to seek more disclosures about the deliberations and events that led to the money, which has since been released, being held back last summer.

Parnas — who has been trying to get House impeachment investigators’ attention for weeks — alleged in an interview with NBC News on Wednesday evening that Trump personally blessed his covert effort to pressure Ukraine to investigate his political adversaries. He also admitted to conveying to the Ukrainians a “quid pro quo” message that aid would flow only when the nation publicly committed to such a probe.

That makes Parnas the second individual to say he conveyed such a demand to Ukrainian officials; Ambassador to the European Union Gordon Sondland also told impeachment investigators that he conveyed an ultimatum to the U.S. ally: an investigation for a White House meeting and military assistance.

In a phone call last year, Trump asked Ukrainian President Volodymyr Zelensky to investigate Biden and his son Hunter. Despite his specific request in the call, Trump has said he was concerned with overall corruption in the country and was not seeking to exploit Ukraine’s desire for a strong sign of support from United States in the face of Russian military aggression to secure investigations.

Parnas also submitted documents to Congress that showed Robert F. Hyde, a Republican congressional candidate and former Marine, suggesting to Parnas last year that he was tracking former Ambassador to Ukraine Marie Yovanovitch, who was eventually ousted from her post after a campaign led by Trump’s allies.

Ukrainian authorities announced a probe Thursday into the possible surveillance of Yovanovitch before Trump dismissed her from the post. The FBI also visited Hyde’s home and business Thursday. Parnas said in the interview with NBC that he didn’t believe Hyde was actually tracking Yovanovitch and it was an empty boast.

Democrats, who delayed transmitting the articles of impeachment to the Senate for weeks as they tried to ensure that a trial would include testimony from key witnesses, said that Parnas’s revelations bolstered their argument.

“I think it just underscores the point that we do need to bring in some witnesses and we need to make sure that all relevant documents and relevant witnesses are heard,” said Rep. Sylvia Garcia (D-Tex.), one of the seven House impeachment managers.

While Democrats stressed the need to present Parnas’s information, if not call him in to testify in a Senate trial, Republicans sought to challenge his credibility by highlighting that he had been indicted on campaign finance charges last year.

Sen. John Cornyn (R-Tex.) dismissed the Giuliani associate as a “shady figure.” House Minority Leader Kevin McCarthy (R-Calif.) told reporters Thursday that Parnas “lacks all credibility.”

Trump on Thursday denied knowing Parnas and dismissed a photo of himself with the Giuliani associate as one of “thousands” he has taken with supporters as president.

“I don’t know him at all,” Trump told reporters on the sidelines of an Oval Office event on religious freedom. “Don’t know what he’s about. Don’t know where he comes from.”

Later, in his first tweet after the Senate impeachment trial began, Trump wrote: “I JUST GOT IMPEACHED FOR MAKING A PERFECT PHONE CALL!”

The impeachment trial was able to begin formally after the seven House managers, led by House Intelligence Chairman Adam B. Schiff (D-Calif.), arrived in the Senate to formally present the two charges: abuse of power and obstruction of Congress.

After the Senate sergeant of arms warned senators to remain silent “upon pain of imprisonment,” Schiff read the text of House Resolution 755 “Impeaching Donald John Trump, President of the United States, for high crimes and misdemeanors.”

“President Trump thus warrants impeachment and trial, removal from office and disqualification to hold and enjoy any office of honor, trust or profit under the United States,” Schiff said as he finished reading from the articles.

Later, John G. Roberts Jr., chief justice of the United States, was sworn in to preside over the trial. Roberts then asked the senators to “solemnly swear” to “do impartial justice according to the Constitution and laws.”

While each senator said “I do,” Democrats and Republicans immediately clashed over what constitutes a fair trial. The key point of division was whether to hear from witnesses who could shed additional light on Trump’s Ukraine dealings.

Democrats are pressing for several witnesses who did not participate in the House impeachment proceedings, including former national security adviser John Bolton and acting White House chief of staff Mick Mulvaney.

“In America, trials have evidence, and coverups do not,” said Sen. Christopher A. Coons (D-Del.).

The White House has blocked testimony from several officials with direct knowledge of Trump’s conduct, but some Republicans indicated they were open to considering witnesses after the initial phase of the trial, which Senate Majority Leader Mitch McConnell (R-Ky.) has said will begin in earnest on Tuesday, after the Martin Luther King Jr. holiday.

Sen. Kevin Cramer (R-N.D.) was among a group of senators pushing the idea of “reciprocity,” whereby the Republican and Democratic sides would each get to call witnesses. Some Republicans, including Trump, have said they are interested in hearing from Hunter Biden and the whistleblower whose complaint ultimately led to the impeachment inquiry.

Cramer said he would “be surprised if there weren’t witnesses” eventually.

“My view on it is, I want to wait and start by hearing from both sides and then ask the questions and then be informed by that,” Cramer said. “You know, I think at this point we’re all in jury mode, and that’s the best way to proceed. It’s really up to the House managers to make the case for these things. I’m certainly open to it. And we’ll see what they say.”

Sen. Susan Collins (R-Maine) said it was “likely” that she would vote for additional witnesses after the initial arguments. If all Democrats vote in unison, they would need four Republicans to join them in order to secure testimony from any particular witness.

But some senators sought to dodge the question of witnesses altogether, aiming to avoid reporters and underscoring the tense atmosphere surrounding the case.

Rather than answer a question about the impeachment trial, Sen. Martha McSally (R-Az.) repeatedly called a CNN reporter a “liberal hack” Thursday — an exchange that a McSally staffer taped and Trump’s campaign later praised and promoted.

“THREE CHEERS for Senator @MarthaMcSally!!! THIS is how you handle FAKE NEWS @CNN,” the @TrumpWarRoom campaign account tweeted.

______

Colby Itkowitz, Isabelle Khurshudyan, Felicia Sonmez, John Wagner and Matt Zapotosky contributed to this report.

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‘It was like a breeding ground’: Trump hotel’s mix of GOP insiders and hangers-on helped give rise to impeachment episodes

By David A. Fahrenthold, Josh Dawsey and Jonathan O'Connell | Published

January 16 at 7:12 PM ET | Washington Post | Posted January 16, 2020 |

They are key locations in the drama that led to President Trump’s impeachment: the steakhouse table where Trump’s private lawyer set out a nameplate, “Rudolph W. Giuliani, Private Office.” The upstairs hideaway, where Giuliani’s team planned its outreach to Ukraine.

And the expensive bar, where Giuliani’s team met an odd figure: Robert F. Hyde, a big-talking ex-Marine who claimed to have the U.S. ambassador to Ukraine under surveillance.

All three places are within 300 yards of each other, in the lobby of the Trump International Hotel.

For three years, Trump’s hotel near the White House has been a loose, anybody-welcome hangout for Republicans. Candidates raise money in the ballrooms. Congressmen and lobbyists dine in the steakhouse. Hangers-on wait at the bar, taking selfies in “#americaslivingroom.”

That arrangement worked for Republicans, because it compressed a city’s worth of networking into one room. It worked for Trump, because he converted political allies into private customers.

But the hotel’s atmosphere of blurred lines — mixing the public interest with Trump’s private interests, and mixing the GOP’s leaders and its wannabe fringes — helped give rise to a scandal that threatens to overshadow Trump’s presidency.

Giuliani and his team didn’t just meet at the Trump hotel. They embodied its world.

“I spent two years going to Washington and I didn’t see the monuments,” said Lev Parnas, who was a central figure in Giuliani’s effort to pressure Ukraine to investigate Trump’s political rival, former vice president Joe Biden. “All I saw was the Trump hotel.”

Trump opened his hotel before he won the presidency, having spent more than $200 million to renovate the government-owned Old Post Office building near the White House. After he won, Trump kept his ownership of the hotel, operated under a federal lease.

But its business model had to change sharply, according to hotel employees.

Democrats wouldn’t stay in the hotel rooms. Many major corporations and associations wouldn’t rent the ballrooms, worried about alienating liberal customers.

They shifted to focus on the part of the business that was thriving: the lobby, with its bar and BLT Prime steakhouse.

The place where pro-Trump Republicans see and be seen.

“There were many, many of them that were just there, who we just happened to run into,” said Seth Morrison, executive director of the Orange County, Calif., Lincoln Club. Morrison said his group stayed at the Trump hotel last year on its biannual Washington trip, and encountered a slew of candidates and conservative TV personalities in the lobby. “Eric Bolling was there for like three days in the lobby,” Morrison said of the conservative commentator.

Instead of being a hotel with a lobby, the Trump property became a lobby with a hotel attached.

It raised prices at the lobby bar: Candied bacon went from $14 to $22. The most expensive cocktail on the menu had been $21. Then it added one for $100, with caviar in it.

The hotel also spent big on upgrades to the lobby and restaurant: $264,000 for new lobby furniture. An additional $24,000 on carpets in the first-floor hallways. And $15,000 for a new ice-cream maker for dessert specials, according to hotel documents obtained by The Washington Post. At the same time, the hotel had to shut down its outdoor patio because of anti-Trump protesters.

Just as Republican business was reshaping the Trump hotel, the Trump hotel was changing the GOP — by bottling up its top leaders with any wannabe who sat at the bar.

“POTUS doesn’t know, or maybe doesn’t care, but that hotel is the root of many of his problems,” said one Republican who is close to Giuliani and Trump, and spoke on the condition of anonymity to preserve relationships with them.

Trump himself has come to the hotel at least 18 times, including for three of his own campaign fundraisers, where he is both the candidate and the caterer.

In addition, top GOP-aligned lobbyists such as Brian Ballard and Jeff Miller also work the room. And Republican National Committee Chairwoman Ronna McDaniel convenes some of the party’s top operatives for a monthly “off-the-record dinner,” in a private room at the hotel. Over wine and steak — the price tag is about $3,000 per month and paid for by the RNC, officials say — party officials, lobbyists, White House aides, officials leading Republican super PACs and congressional political leaders meet to talk business.

“You’ve got top confidants of the president hanging out in the hotel lobby, and you can mingle with them for the price of a $20 glass of wine,” said Zach Everson, a journalist who chronicles the Trump hotel’s mixing of politics and business on the blog 1100 Pennsylvania. By Everson’s count, 25 people who have served in Trump’s Cabinet have visited the hotel, along with 30 of the 53 Republicans in the Senate.

No figure embodied that mixing better than Giuliani, the former New York mayor who has reinvented himself as a lawyer, fixer and off-the-books emissary for Trump.

“Rudy is probably the most senior person who’s readily accessible to the public for the price of a drink,” Everson said.

Giuliani claimed enormous private influence. But at the Trump hotel, he sat out in public, spending hours at his “private office,” a table in the lobby steakhouse’s bar. One former Trump hotel staffer said that Giuliani was so comfortable there that he sometimes left without paying — “like he was at home.” The restaurant often had to eat the bill, the former employee said — who spoke on the condition of anonymity to preserve relationships in the hospitality business.

At that table, Giuliani met repeatedly with Parnas and Igor Fruman, a pair of Soviet-born Americans who were seeking influence in Republican politics — and helping Giuliani pressure Ukraine to provide dirt on Biden. On the day Parnas and Fruman were arrested, charged with campaign-finance violations unrelated to Ukraine, they had previously had lunch at the Trump hotel.

“It was like a breeding ground at the Trump hotel,” Parnas told MSNBC’s Rachel Maddow in an interview Wednesday night. “You would see the same people every day, all the same congressmen that supported the president would be there, nobody else.”

When the group needed more privacy, Parnas told Maddow, they retreated to a private space: “our BLT office on the second floor.”

“At the Trump hotel?” Maddow asked.

“At the Trump hotel,” Parnas said.

Parnas also met with Trump in one of the hotel’s luxury suites, at a “roundtable” organized by the pro-Trump super PAC America First Actions, according to people familiar with the meeting. Parnas is now facing federal campaign-finance charges, and emerged as a key witness against Trump in the days before Trump’s impeachment trial begins.

If Giuliani was one of the most powerful Republicans in the lobby, then Hyde — the ex-Marine from Connecticut — was one of the least. But his story illustrates how the Trump hotel allows fringe characters to rise in influence, just by being in the right place.

Hyde is a Republican donor and long-shot congressional candidate who began hanging out at the hotel — along with other Trump properties — and posting photos of himself with GOP figures. He began to date Rabia Kazan, a onetime pro-Trump activist he met there.

“Trump is like a cult leader, and people go to the hotel to show their loyalty and love for him,” Kazan said. Their relationship ended after several weeks, Kazan said.

In the past year, Hyde was involuntarily committed to a psychiatric hospital in Florida, and was hit with a restraining order in Washington for allegedly harassing a former business associate, according to court and police records.

Hyde sent Parnas texts saying that he had Marie Yovanovitch — then the U.S. ambassador to Ukraine and a perceived obstacle to Giuliani’s plans — under surveillance in Kyiv. Hyde has since said he was joking.

Where did Parnas link up with somebody like that?

“At the Trump hotel,” Parnas told Maddow. “He was a regular at the bar.”

______

Beth Reinhard, Aaron Davis, Dalton Bennett and Rosalind S. Helderman contributed to this report.

*********

The Senate trial will shape the president’s legacy and also that of his Republican Party

By Dan Balz | Published January 16 at 5:24 PM EST | Washington Post | Posted January 16, 2020 |

Thursday was a day of pomp and ceremony in the Senate at the opening of the impeachment trial of President Trump. But apart from all the scripted theater, the formalities marked a new and important test for the Republicans who control the upper chamber and therefore what kind of trial the country sees and what history remembers of those who sat in judgment.

The challenge for Republicans is not the question of the ultimate disposition of the case against Trump contained in the two articles of impeachment read into the record on the Senate floor at midday Thursday. That appears to be a foregone conclusion, given the partisan makeup of the Senate.

Instead it is the question of how they will address and digest evidence of the president’s actions with regard to Ukraine that has come out over the past four months. It is not just the president’s legacy that will be affected by the conduct of the proceedings over the next few weeks. It will also be the legacy of the Republican senators and their party.

Will they follow the lead of their House colleagues, who in the face of damning testimony embraced the president’s explanations, that his interactions with Ukraine were “perfect,” and that he was acting in the interests of the country rather than for personal political gain? Or will they judge him more independently, and critically, even if eventually stopping short of casting guilty votes?

The House managers, who will begin to present their case Tuesday, will come with the evidence developed during weeks of testimony and debate that resulted in the party-line vote to impeach Trump at the end of December. That evidence includes testimony from a series of career Foreign Service and national security officials outlining the months-long effort to pressure Ukraine.

But that won’t be the only thing that senators sitting as jurors will have to take under consideration, as it is likely that additional evidence will emerge from outside the chamber that will weigh on their decision-making. Already, in the month since the House voted to impeach Trump, there have been a series of revelations and statements that pose new challenges for the president’s defense team and, importantly, for those in his party.

Hours before Chief Justice John G. Roberts Jr. was sworn in as the presiding officer for the trial, and before he in turn swore in the members of the Senate, the Government Accountability Office issued a report stating that the White House had broken the law by withholding $391 million in military aid for Ukraine that had been authorized by Congress. A spokeswoman for the Office of Management and Budget took issue with that finding.

The GAO report followed the release of documents given by Lev Parnas, an associate of Rudolph W. Giuliani, the president’s personal attorney, to House investigators and television interviews Parnas gave Wednesday. Those interviews and the documents further highlighted Giuliani’s role in Ukraine, including the efforts to force the removal of Marie Yovanovitch as U.S. ambassador to Ukraine. Parnas’s description of events also tied the president more directly to the activity. He is under indictment in federal court and his word must be viewed with skepticism, but what he has said and the documents he has offered further raise the stakes.

Shortly after the House’s impeachment vote, new emails from within the administration surfaced, including one from Michael Duffey, a senior official in the Office of Management and Budget, directing Pentagon officials to put a hold on the aid to Ukraine. The email was sent less than two hours after a Trump phone call with Ukrainian President Volodymyr Zelensky in which Trump had requested “a favor”: an investigation into a discredited theory about Ukrainian interference in the 2016 election as well as into former vice president Joe Biden and his son Hunter.

There was also one other surprise during the interregnum between the House vote and this week’s formalities. That was the statement from John Bolton, the former national security adviser, who said that, if subpoenaed, he was prepared to testify at the Senate trial. As one of a handful of White House officials with direct knowledge of the events under scrutiny, Bolton was offering something that has made Republican senators squirm.

It will take 51 votes for any witnesses to be allowed into the Senate trial, which means support from at least four Republicans. When it happens, as seems likely, the vote will trigger another partisan battle over who should be called, particularly what witnesses the president’s defenders might demand — such as Biden or his son. That fight will not come for some days, not until after the House managers and the president’s defense team present their cases.

Members of the Senate took an oath to render impartial justice, but in the hyperpartisan climate that exists today, many lawmakers already have declared their verdicts. Some Democrats, including some of the senators seeking the presidential nomination, have said they have seen enough to persuade them that Trump should be convicted and removed from office. On the other side are Republicans who have declared Trump not guilty, and Senate Majority Leader Mitch McConnell (R-Ky.) said weeks ago he was working closely with the White House in preparation for the trial.

But if, as everyone expects, the verdict is a predictable acquittal on what is likely to be a vote that runs closely if not exclusively along party lines, the question of how seriously the evidence is weighed and examined is another matter. The president would have preferred a breezy dismissal, though that was never realistic. On Thursday, shortly after the senators had been sworn, he said he hopes for a quick trial, declaring the whole matter a “phony hoax.”

Many of Trump’s loyalists believe Democrats have been looking for any reason to bring down the president and treated the current impeachment process accordingly. What they did not do in the House was to effectively rebut the testimony of those career officials. Instead they challenged that evidence on the basis that it was not firsthand knowledge, even as the White House blocked those with such knowledge from testifying.

The Senate trial will give the president an opportunity for his team of lawyers to present a defense. Whether they accede to witnesses, particularly the White House officials who have not yet been heard from, is another matter.

Being a Republican during the Trump presidency demands much. He is quick to anger at any Republican who strays from absolute loyalty and at times has sought to punish those who have. Few have had the wherewithal to question him, and they have generally paid a price. Their examples have shaped the behavior of others in the party.

That’s a major difference between this impeachment proceeding and the one two decades ago involving President Bill Clinton. That Senate trial ended in an acquittal, largely on party lines. But the year-long episode also included condemnations of the president’s behavior by members of his own party, both what he did and that he lied about it.

If Clinton’s Democratic colleagues did not believe his conduct ultimately warranted removal from office, they nonetheless found it worthy of rebuke. That is one way to measure how those in the president’s party handle the allegations contained in the two articles of impeachment against Trump and ultimately the meaning of “impartial justice” as defined by each individual senator.

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Patrick Leahy: Trump broke the law. Congress must now defend the separation of powers.

By Patrick Leahy | Published January 16 at 7:48 PM EST | Washington Post | Posted January 16, 2020 |

Patrick Leahy, a Democrat, represents Vermont in the U.S. Senate, where he is vice chairman of the Appropriations Committee.

On Thursday morning, hours before senators were sworn in to serve on President Trump’s impeachment trial, an independent, nonpartisan government watchdog confirmed what I have long suspected: When Trump froze congressionally appropriated military aid to Ukraine as part of an effort to compel Ukraine to investigate his political rival, he broke the law.

That’s because a central feature of our republic, defined by its separation of powers among the three branches of government, is that Congress, not the president, controls the “power of the purse.” James Madison argued that this was “the most complete and effectual weapon” to counter “all the overgrown prerogatives of the other branches.” The nation’s founders enshrined their vision in Article 1, Section 9 of the Constitution, establishing that Congress alone possesses the power of the purse. The president can propose funding for whatever projects he wants, but Congress ultimately decides where to direct the American people’s tax dollars.

Nearly 200 years later, in 1974, Congress overwhelmingly enacted the Impoundment Control Act (ICA) in response to President Richard M. Nixon’s overreach into Congress’s appropriations power. The ICA grants presidents limited ability to cut or delay any spending appropriated by Congress. If presidents wish not to spend appropriated money, they must seek and obtain Congress’s approval. Even a delay in spending requires notice to Congress.

On Thursday, the nonpartisan Government Accountability Office concluded that, because the “Constitution grants the President no unilateral authority to withhold funds,” the administration “violated the ICA.” The GAO further found that the administration’s excuses for the president’s actions “have no basis in law.”

A violation of a law, by itself, is not necessarily sufficient to warrant impeachment and removal from office. The “high crimes and misdemeanors” required by the Constitution refer instead to misdeeds in high office — a “violation of some public trust,” according to Alexander Hamilton — which need not be criminal. It is now the Senate’s responsibility to decide whether the president abused the powers of his office for personal gain when he withheld congressionally appropriated funds from an ally in violation of the Impoundment Control Act.

In fiscal 2019, Congress appropriated $250 million in military assistance for Ukraine, a U.S. ally, through the Defense Department, and Trump signed that assistance into law. Russian-backed forces invaded Ukraine in 2014, forcibly annexing Crimea. Approximately 13,000 people have since been killed, and more than 1.5 million displaced.

The Pentagon strongly supported the military assistance and certified last spring that Ukraine had implemented anti-corruption measures required by Congress as a condition of the aid. But the president secretly froze the aid two months later, over warnings from Defense Department officials that doing so risked violating the ICA, while the president and his associates pressed Ukraine to launch baseless investigations that would help him politically. The president released the aid in September — after he got caught.

In my 43 years on the Senate Appropriations Committee, where I now serve as vice chairman, I have never seen anything like it.

Senior White House aides, such as budget official Michael Duffey and acting White House chief of staff Mick Mulvaney, could tell us exactly what happened, but Trump directed them not to testify before the House. The Senate must insist on hearing from these and other key witnesses.

If Trump disagreed with Congress’s appropriation, he could have vetoed the bill. He did not. Thereafter, he could have proposed a “rescission” to block the aid under the ICA, which requires congressional approval. He did not. Or, with congressional notification, he could have deferred the funds — but only for specific reasons under the Impoundment Control Act that the GAO found did not apply. He did not attempt this either. As the GAO opinion makes clear, the president chose a fourth option, one that violated the law.

The ICA is not just a technical appropriations law. It reinforces the control over taxpayer dollars the Constitution reserved for Congress. Having won independence from a monarchy, the framers feared an unchecked executive with the power to use public dollars as a slush fund for his personal interests. After all, if the president can interpose his personal interests between congressional appropriations and a designated funding recipient, such as Ukraine, what would stop him from withholding development funds intended for a U.S. city until the mayor endorses him? What stops him from holding any part of the $4.7 trillion annual federal budget hostage to his personal whims?

Congress chose to provide military assistance to an ally that is literally under attack by Russia. The president chose to delay that aid, violating the law, because he viewed his political interests as more important.

Each senator has sworn an oath to defend the Constitution. And on Thursday we took yet another oath to do “impartial justice according to the Constitution.” Will the Senate now defend the Constitution’s carefully balanced separation of powers? How we answer this and other critical questions in the coming weeks will define America’s democracy for generations to come.

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We differ in our politics. We agree on Congress’s power to declare war.

By Justin Amash, Ken Buck, Jared Golden, Scott Perry, Dean Phillips, Chip Roy and Abigail Spanberger | Published

Jan 16 at 4:50 PM EST | Washington Post | Posted January 16, 2020 |

We are members of Congress whose political ideologies and priorities run the gamut, but we are united in our determination to safeguard the constitutional duty of Congress to declare war and to ensure that the American people have their voices heard. This duty is essential to providing the men and women of our armed forces the support and clarity of mission they deserve.

Leaders from across the political spectrum have too often avoided that responsibility — and the full debate and engagement it brings. Congress must act now, before our inaction irrevocably undermines our constitutional separation of powers and endangers lives.

Article I, Section 8 of the Constitution places the power to declare war in Congress. As representatives of the people, we have a responsibility to engage with them on the purposes, goals and risks of war. The Founders rested this authority with Congress to guarantee that the decision to send Americans into harm’s way would be made by the individuals most accountable to the people.

Today, less than half of 1 percent of Americans serve in the armed forces. Too often, military families experience multiple deployments while the rest of us, including members of Congress, go about our lives disconnected from their sacrifice. Our broken system is failing them.

We have been at war in the Middle East for nearly two decades, under authorizations for use of military force (AUMFs) that our predecessors in Congress passed almost a generation ago. Men and women of our armed forces continue to risk their lives as presidents of both parties stretch these authorizations to justify often tenuously related military engagements. Rather than debating and voting on present conflicts, Congress habitually acquiesces to the executive branch’s actions. This must change; the Constitution demands it, and the people we represent deserve it.

Last week, the House of Representatives voted on a concurrent resolution regarding the use of force against Iran or its agents. For some of us, this vote was a positive step toward reasserting Congress’s constitutional responsibilities. For others, it was an inadequate and inapt substitute for real action. Regardless of our respective positions on that vote, we firmly agree that Congress must reclaim its Article I responsibility regarding the use of force.

To start, it is time to have a serious debate and vote on repeal of the 2002 AUMF, which authorized the use of force against Saddam Hussein’s government in Iraq. This authorization has fully outlived its purpose, given the death of Hussein, regime change and the withdrawal of U.S. forces in 2011, regardless of how one views the merits of that withdrawal.

Just last year, the full House supported, on a nonpartisan basis, repeal of the 2002 AUMF as an amendment to the National Defense Authorization Act, but this provision was later stripped from the final text as the House and Senate conferred. The 2002 authorization — as well as a lingering 1991 authorization — should be removed from the books, lest either be used to justify further military engagement beyond what Congress intended.

We also must foster an informed debate on a strategic alternative to the 2001 authorization. It granted the president authority to use force against those responsible for the attacks on 9/11, or those who harbored such organizations or people, yet it has been used to justify an array of military engagements against targets that, although perhaps worthy, were in some cases nonexistent or unimagined 19 years ago. We are committed to developing and debating a new approach that provides the executive branch with the latitude necessary to fight the ongoing transnational terrorist threat, while also ensuring that Congress takes responsibility, as the Constitution requires, for the decision to send men and women off to war.

Our debates and votes must affirm that the decision to proceed with war-making resides in Congress. The declarations or authorizations we pass must have a clear scope and requirement of periodic congressional reconsideration to ensure the proper defense of our nation and prevent ill-defined forever wars.

We expect that any effort to reconsider the 2001 authorization will be difficult, contentious and emotional, but it must not be partisan. In the face of geopolitical challenges and transnational threats, it is more important than ever that Congress affirm its willingness to do its job, debate the hardest of topics and vote — expressing the will of the people — on the wars that may take the lives of those we represent.

At a time of divisive, angry partisanship, the call to do right by our service members, their families and the Constitution is one that can and should unite us. We are a group of representatives who, despite our disagreements, stand together to affirm the role and duty of Congress. In the halls of Congress and at gatherings around the country, let us lay down our partisan swords and commit to do better by the men and women in uniform who take up arms on behalf of our nation and the Constitution we swore to support and defend.

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Reps. Justin Amash (I-Mich.), Ken Buck (R-Colo.), Jared Golden (D-Maine), Scott Perry (R-Pa.), Dean Phillips (D-Minn.), Chip Roy (R-Tex.) and Abigail Spanberger (D-Va.) are members of the House of Representatives.

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The Trump team keeps denying it knows Lev Parnas, despite growing photographic evidence (You can see photos on website.)

By Aaron Blake | Published January 16 at 6:28 PM EST | Washington Post | Posted January 16, 2020 |

President Trump has made a habit of distancing himself from people in his orbit — often in dubious ways — when they suddenly turn out to be inconvenient.

But when it comes to Lev Parnas, he’s not the only one.

Over the past 24 hours or so, several top Republicans have had their statements about their personal familiarity with Parnas called into question.

Leading the charge is Trump, who insisted repeatedly Thursday afternoon about Parnas, “I don’t know the guy,” and “I don’t know him.” Trump, in fact, said some version of that nine times in just two minutes.

It was par-for-course for a president who essentially suggested that Paul Manafort was a temp on his 2016 campaign rather than the campaign chairman for several months, turned George Papadopoulos into a “low-level volunteer” and suggested Michael Cohen was simply one of many Trump attorneys. But in this case, it’s particularly implausible.

There are, of course, the photographs of Trump and Parnas that have made the rounds.

But it’s also difficult to square Trump’s claim with The Washington Post’s November scoop that Parnas badmouthed then-U.S. Ambassador to Ukraine Marie Yovanovitch directly to Trump at an April 2018 donor event. The Post reported that Trump, in response, suggested that Yovanovitch be fired.

And then, after Trump relegated Parnas on Thursday to a guy he didn’t know, Parnas’s attorney, Joseph A. Bondy, posted a 2017 video of them again hobnobbing at an event.

Bondy has a similar response to White House counselor Kellyanne Conway’s similar claim Wednesday night on CNN. After Conway twice said, “I don’t know Lev Parnas,” Bondy posted an undated image of the two of them together.

Rep. Devin Nunes (R-Calif.) has struggled through his own questions about how close he is to Parnas — and it all led to a suspiciously timed disclosure Wednesday night.

When Parnas’s phone records came out last month, it showed contacts with Nunes. That was particularly stunning, given that Nunes was a leader of Trump’s impeachment defense as the ranking Republican on the House Intelligence Committee. The idea that he might be wrapped up in all this but didn’t disclose it would have been big. But Nunes begged off the questions, saying in early December that he didn’t “recall” Parnas’s name and hadn’t yet confirmed that he had spoken with Parnas.

Then, with Parnas’s MSNBC interview being announced Wednesday afternoon, Nunes suddenly decided to confirm it. He told Fox News beforehand that they did speak on the phone but maintained they weren’t really working together. “I remember that call, which was very odd, random, talking about random things,” Nunes said. “And I said, ‘Great, just talk to my staff,’ and boom boom boom.”

To which Parnas responded on MSNBC: “He knew what’s happening. He knows who I am.”

And finally is the case of House Minority Leader Kevin McCarthy (R-Calif.). McCarthy said about Parnas last week, “I guess I met him one time, and he came to an event and took a picture with me.” It turns out that they have attended at least three events together, according to Courthouse News.

Courthouse News’s Adam Klasfeld pressed McCarthy on it Thursday, and McCarthy grew testy and said he didn’t know how many times he’d met Parnas “because I don’t know him.” McCarthy added: “People come to events, and they take photos with me. This seems to be the case.”

The thing is: That’s plausible! It’s entirely possible that McCarthy and Conway don’t really know Parnas. It’s possible that Parnas combined working with Trump personal attorney Rudolph W. Giuliani on Ukraine with being a gadfly at Republican political events, where people want to be pictured with powerful people. But when you deny you know someone or say you met them only once, you should probably ensure that’s the case.

From there, it becomes a question of what does it mean to “know” someone. If you’ve met them once, do you really “know” them, or do you just “know of” them. This is the semantic and philosophical debate the Trump team is leaning on.

But that debate tends more toward the ridiculous when it comes to Nunes and Trump. Parnas is in Nunes’s phone records, and Nunes has been anything but forthcoming about it. Parnas has also been shoulder-to-shoulder with Trump — the man whose personal attorney he worked directly with — on at least two occasions apart from just being in a photo.

It’s just the kind of thing the lends itself to suspicion.

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