#rip in pieces to all you normal ppl

[groovygrub]

[little-cereal-draws]

Details I noticed in Nimona pt 5

It was mentioned in this post on Instagram that Nimona was there in the crowd before the knighting ceremony. A person blocks her from view for a second and she emerges on the other side as a rat

In the video clip the news anchors play of baby Ballister hopping the fence, the Queen is there. She's sitting in a booth on the bottom right of the screen so she's slightly blocked by the crowd watching the news but she sits forward as Ballister runs in. The Director is in the upper right as she leads the class

During Ambrosius' introduction, there's a clip of him taking a selfie with a kid in the Glorodome. There are two men wearing red coats behind them who hug/lean into each other in a very couple-y pose. Are gay relationships ok here?

Ballister smiles when Ambrosius calls him "thinky face." At this point he hasn't even looked at him yet but Ambs can still make him smile

The knighting ceremony must have been done in alphabetical order by first name because that's the only way you would get Ambrosius and then Ballister right after each other

Ballister is definitely bleeding after the jumbotron falls. It looks like dirt in the shadows but he's got a huge scrape on his forehead that is red in the light

There's a reflective piece of glass or metal right by Ballister's work bench. You can see his reflection in it as he makes his arm and then Nimona's reflection as she sits in the chair, playing with the knife

The papers Nimona drew her "resume" on have the Institute logo on them. Somehow she got ahold of Institute letter paper lol

Everyone likes to talk about the symbolism of the eye highlights so here's something interesting. In the scene where Nimona declares herself his sidekick, Ballister's eye highlights are the same shape as hers. His highlights go back to squares in the next scene

A nice bit of character acting- Ballister holds his wounded shoulder as the knights shove him in the holding cell

I know people have already pointed out that you can see Nimona as a rat as the Director leaves his cell but there are also normal rats and you can hear them squeaking

Ballister's prosthetic has a ball at the top of it that mimics the ball and socket joint of the shoulder. That means that it would need something to attach to. He’s probably got a metal bit on his torso that the ball has to go into to be able to have the full mobility of a shoulder. Meaning… Ambrosius took off his arm and a chunk of his torso

As they’re walking past all the knights Nimona beat up during the jailbreak and she says “They were like this when I got here,” there’s a knight stuffed inside the vending machine and a sword sticking out of the filing cabinet

When Nimona’s cooking the mushrooms for the breakfast tacos, she breathes fire on them but her back is to the camera so that ability is still a surprise to the viewer later. You can tell it's her though because her fire is orange and the fire from the stove is blue

When Ballister takes the arrow out of Nimona's leg, she's sitting on an old car seat(?) and he's kneeling on the ground next to her with one leg up. He's got her injured leg resting across his knee. Idk maybe ppl already knew that but I always thought he was sitting on the seat next to her

The knight that Nimona points to when she says, "He just peed his armor, he peed his armor!" is the otter knight with the cast on his arm (rip that guy lol)

The Institute has a motto that's four words in Latin. It's on the Insitute's logo but is most visible when the Director does press conferences. It reads, "Trad?m?? Securitas ???????? ???????" (The bottom two words get cut off by the podium) I'm pretty sure it translates to "Keeping our way of life safe" which is the tagline on the picture of the Director Ballister has on his murder wall

After the Kingdom rebuilds, there's a shot of hover cars going in and out of the wall. On the wall, they've laid the stones to make a phoenix pattern

When Ballister hangs up Nimona's headphones when he's cleaning up the tower, her sunglasses are hung above them

pt one, pt two, pt three, pt four

[grntaire]

Yoooo I really love the choral music you’ve recently shared. I’m not really that familiar with it as a genre of music and don’t normally seek it out? but occasionally a piece will find its way to me (like at a funeral or now your blog), and I find it arrestingly beautiful. maybe partly because it’s a strange and unfamiliar medium to me. Do you have any favorites you would recommend for further exploration? 🩷

hi this is maybe the most hyped i've been for an ask ever bc i go fucking crazy for choral music so YES i do have recs for you. i will try to limit my little thoughts however i am very annoying so it will not go well

gibbons' hosanna to the son of david goes insanely hard. so jovial and fun and i had a blast singing this in undergrad! i love renaissance polyphony and this is a prime example of it!

poulenc's o magnum mysterium is truthfully wacky in the best most french way ever. and imo poulenc's queerness is so clear and present in his music so anything by him i love. my beautiful fruity catholic with a disorder <3

chesnokov's spaseniye sodelal is russian orthodox perfection fr. when my choir in undergrad read thru this i was stood between two low basses and at THAT part (1:32) i felt like i was being punched from the inside out. also the text means "salvation is created in the midst of the earth" and i think that's like. so fucking sick

stacey gibbs' arrangement of ezekiel is THE american spiritual arrangement to me. i once sang this in an italian church under a mexican conductor and then later we all sang it drunkenly for the owner at the hotel we were all staying at it was wild and so so so fun. such a beautiful and massive example of a joyful american spiritual also it's straight up a banger honestly. could talk ad nauseum abt how badass black choral scholars are and how grateful i am for all of the work that they've done and for inviting ppl to learn abt and experience it <3

holst's i love my love is one of my favs of all time. unfortunately england fucking devours when it comes to their choral tradition and this piece does one of my fav things where the way the composer sets the text changes its meaning! it's abt a woman named nancy who is in bedlam bc her love died at sea and it effectively broke her. while there, he comes to her, alive, breaks her out and they get married. while the poem itself shows a happy ending, the way holst plays w tempo and texture makes me go hmmm. 90% sure he did not show up and she's experiencing a delusion of sorts to cope w her grief (the i love my love's in the sopranos & altos at 1:24 kind of emulate a rocking motif, almost as if she's rocking herself back and forth in a soothing gesture, or the rocking of the ship he died on) and that tenor entrance in the melody after almost emulates her love coming to rescue her. god this whole piece makes me feel like my skin is on fire and i think it's a devastating portrayal of mental illness and you can rip it from my cold dead hands

stanford's beati quorum via is literally just gorgeous front to back. again unfortunately the english stay slaying

jake runestad's a silence haunts me literally does fucking haunt me and it changed the way i think about choral music. it's a setting of an unsent letter of beethoven's where he talks about losing his hearing and how afraid he is of losing it. this one you def have to watch bc there's a visual element to it! no spoilers but holy shit it shuts my brain down it's brutal and beautiful. i saw its premiere in 2019 and the entire hall was sobbing. like i have the words "be well" tattooed on me bc of it. the way the piano quotes moonlight sonata and his 9th symphony and the tensions emulating his tinnitus. OUGH

[yuukei-yikes]

shintaro driving momo around and he lets her pick the music and she gets loud and shakes the car every time and he is so tired but she is having fun so he lets her lose her mind every time he takes her to school. there are two types of shintaro: guy who drives and is kind of a car guy and guy who will never have a license. but i support car guy shintaro...

YESYESYEYSYESYS GOD PLEASE MORE ASKS LIKE THESE WITH HEADCANONS THEYRE EVERYTHINNNNNGGGGG

if i wasnt at work rn id sooooo make a doodle of shintaro being so proud of his license but refusing to show it to ppl because his picture looks awful. i also think shintaro can drive btw i think the first to get a license is takane then shintaro. haruka and ayano probably do too at some point but they're cute so they mostly get rides🙂👍 everyone else is still a minor so rip no driving for u all yet well mekatrio probably can drive too when they turn 18. i think seto and kido would get licenses normally and kano would be the one whos like im wayyyy too cute to drive!!! take me places NOW!! *points at shintaro* YOU. wait. im not making this a who in the dan drives hc list. STOP ME seriously i have a condition *holds head*

YES. SHINTARO DRIVING MOMO AROUND YESSSS YES YES YES. momo has kido AND knows how to control her powers so its not like she Needs to be driven to avoid crowds but that's the excuse she uses for shintaro cuz then he feels bad and does it💗 he would drive her anyway but she thinks he needs convincing 💗 the day momo learns how much of a pushover shintaro is when it comes to her is the day of his demise. driving her to school is such a good hc *shakes ur hand* it helps shintaro maintain a rutine as he gets out of the shut in habits!!! and they hang out and are silly. shintaro annoyed at all her music in the first half of the ride but by the second half they arrive to school singing screaming together. KISARAGI SIBLINGS BONDING TIMEEEEEE *melts*

SHINTARO TEACHING MOMO HOW TO DRIVE PLEASEEEE rest in pieces kisaragi mama's car. omg wait. obviously momo crashes it but shintaro taking the blame to protect momo from kisaragi mom rage *loses my mind goes insane*

[tottymatsuno]

On mobile so sorry since no read more:

So the au in itself is basically asmodeus/todomatsu trying to reassemble his dead from her soul that’s been scattered across all of reality. Basically if I find an au of Totty sexy, or any of my fics I’ve already publish just imagine after it’s over Todomatsu has to make a deal with the devil (himself) to either prevent or to end a tragedy.

Now Asmodeus only really needs 8 of these fragments, and he’s following a specific order too.

I do wanna point out in this au, regular pink hoodie Totty is like the one I’d encounter the most, but Todomatsu is still mostly either an angel or something. Idk it’s vague I’ll fix it in post without changing anything. It’ll make sense dw.

So anyways atm I have two angel aus shared with Evan and Izzy. One based off of the angel hesokuri set, benis are sent down to like do a really tough job bc me and Erina are not normal and may possibly go to hell. The bad end of that refers to the fact in the end benis pretty much take over bc they don’t want us to go to hell 🫡 wife guys

And the other au is this one I’ve been drawing looots of art for! The body of Christ! I might post the actual fic if ppl are interested.

In the story itself this random angel Todomatsu, who is on a different path than asmo or even other angel Totty had a romantic trist with Kokabiel (dead wife this is all happening for lol) who didn’t die at the regular scheduled time bc they did not get with him. So like he’s an incel but for some reasons I haven’t actually backwards engineered in yet, he gets access to his memories of other lives

And feels immediately vindicated and arrogant that yeah his fucking crush is his soulmate or whatever. So he decides that he will live out his own fantasizes bc what he does isn’t gonna matter in the grand scale do stuff, because he knows how the main story goes, and will end, and everything.

So what he does is pretty horrific lol, he sets up a whole situation, and then says some very creepy dirty talk that ends with him killing me (it’s my self insert sorry) by literally ripping out the piece of kokabiels soul, and then she comes back and like makes him cry 😭

Instead of learning anything from this he is like “why are you broken and what did you do to her” so he doesn’t ever learn anything or at least until he does. Anyways we are no children for a while.

There’s world building stuff that I added bc you know I love rules and intricacies and fitting specific niche themes to characters.

One of them is how angels work.

OKAY SINCE MULTIPLE PPL SAID THEY WERE INTERESTED!!!

The body of Christ au is a spin off of my apostasy au

Which has been inspired by a lot of my friends, but I’d been working on it since 2019?

I remember getting loved of inspiration post partum when I started collaborating with the fellas!

@pajamamatsu for the succubus/demon au inspo

@girlymatsu @ichikos as my main sources of inspo and feedback, and also who compliment me when we play fruit salad with oso, ichi and totty

@itchypinefield for providing so many different facts

I can’t remember which side blog is viris ososan sideblog @marriedonacross but I rmbr viri had a multiverse au

and ofc clover who played otome villainess with us! I haven’t listed everyone but also the fellas in the girls be devious/demon GC for letting me bounce ideas and make a structure for it!

[misticloyal]

More Monkie Kid HC’s

I have absolutely nothing else to do then to debate things that could exist in an alternate universes with these ppl

.

-I saw a piece of fan art and I agree 100%, since Wu Kong’s staff is actually just a column from The Dragon of The East’s palace, he definitely knows how to pole dance. He’s got the strength of it and he’s a monkey so it’s obvious that he knows how to climb shit. 

It’s just funny though since just because The Monkey King knows how to pole dance doesn’t mean he’s good at it, usually he’s just good at the acrobatics, the flow and calculated spins don’t really qualify as entertaining stuff in his books lmao

.

-MK is absolutely obsessed w/ space. At first he was only into his normal animal zodiac (monkey obv- also I’m so sad we don’t know literally any of the character’s birthdays RIP) but after he started using the internet more in his free time- he had time to browse the internet almost everyday but now he’s got so much shit to do- he found out that there’s European Zodiacs too, and got into those as well.

He’s got all his signs figured out, he makes AND takes those personality tests based off of your zodiac. One day he was fighting Red Son, took one look at him and was like “Yeah, you’d totally be an Aries  🙄”

Mei wouldn’t stop laughing for a week lmao

.

-Trans MK is basically cannon at this point, but training with Macaque bak in season 1 fully cemented MK’s experience as being treated as his gender but STEREOTYPED

This sounds way worse then I typed is as, but basically during his training with Macaque MK essentially was being encouraged to indulge in everything ‘a man’ does, like focus on power and strength over literally anything else, and ‘take charge’ and all that.

And while stereotypes usually piss him off, it was an eye opening experience per say cuz after the whole ordeal MK reflected on how most male assholes were encouraging themselves to act like they’re better then everyone on the planet. While for himself, MK had to actually have someone tell him that in order to become better at fighting he needs to embrace his ‘manliness’.

Eventually that’s one of the reasons why Macaque complimenting his fighting was so shocking and meaningful, since it approves the effort MK was making to pass all that time ago. (Now he’s more comfortable with masc and fem presenting whereas before he got dysphoria). Also imagine being the literal enemy and gender affirming your student because they’re genuinely doing well in something, Macaque did at least ONE thing correctly lmao

.

-After encountering LBD and everyone piling on the ship it wasn’t a secret that everyone was stressed out especially after Macaque tried to attack them (let’s assume for the sake of the argument that they managed to fend him off without capsizing the ship LMAo).

But MK started to notice how weary Wu Kong was of accepting anything. Like- if someone offered him food he could come up with a random excuse, if he was cold and someone offered him a blanket he’d just make his own, etc. 

Obviously MK’s super heartbroken because of this and also vaguely curious so one day he asks Wu Kong what’s up, and after a lot of prodding, MK rounded up everyone and the Monkey King told them about how traumatizing and terrible the stupid fucking circlet was in JTTW. 

^I’m making a whole post about this rn but HOLY SHIT I hate that goddamn circlet.

Wu Kong explains how he trusted Tripitaka (after glancing cautiously at Tang) and how he actually felt so betrayed when the circlet started to hurt. Also how close the happen stances were that after the JTTW gang saw the bone spirit for the first time Wu Kong got punished twice just for trying to protect everyone. (With influence from Zhu Ba Jie obv)

.

-Fighting some big demon eventually caused everyone to wait in this random room completely silent (like I’m talking everyone, Iron Fan, DBK, Macaque, Jin and Yin, etc.)

And it was super awkward so MK takes out his phone and you hear this dumbass fucking noise

Mei who instantly understood the assignment ALSO pulls out her phone and after the sound plays a second time Red son very loudly claims

“The world is about to fucking end and you guys are playing fucking Clash Royal?”

To which Jin and Yin EXPLODE with laughter and Red Son has to hastily explain this stupid ass American mobile game to all the deities and adults in the room that have no idea what the hell is going on.

Wu Kong downloads the game so he can beat MK cuz he’s competitive like that (and subsequently gets mad when they don't have a character base off of him and claims he will be sending a letter to the devs about it LMAO)

.

-After trying to lift the staff in the pilot Red Son took pity on the bull clone that lost its arms and made it have a nice and safe life as his personal servant (it’s way better than risking its robotic life everyday)

.

-MK gets handed a cup of coffee in the morning and is like “Oh awesome, thanks!”

And then heads to the cupboard to get his straw.

If he eats soft serve ice cream MK will also refuse to eat it unless he uses his straw. The reason why I say ‘his’ straw is because MK always carries a collapsable metal straw with him. He’s built DIFFERENT bro

.

-In an AU where everyone’s on the airship and Macaque redemption arc is happening, Macaque and Wu Kong constantly switch glamours as each other whenever they don’t have the energy to do something.

Wu Kong has to sit through a lecture with Sandy, and Macaque has nothing else to do? Switch

Macaque is about to get ambushed by MK because he won’t stop asking by about his ears? Cashing in the favour, switch

It even happens for menial chores like washing dishes and doing the laundry and since they treat their switching as a reward/token system it’s like

“Macaque you get to do my turn in laundry, I’m cashing in my switch”

“Wha- no the fuck you’re not, it’s MY turn and I’m saving mine, bitch”

“Uhhh haha very funny, no it’s not I was keeping count dude-“

“Wu Kong don’t even try it I literally have the calendar right here and it says: Last switch- Macaque as Wu Kong hid from Mei and Red Son after he stole their chips,”

“Hmmm okay you make a compelling argument, HOWEVER- and hear me out here: how about you do it anyway” And then he ran off glamoured as Macaque.

“MONKEY KING ITS YOUR TURN TO DO THE LAUNDRY I WILL NOT HESITATE TO SET YOU ASS ON FIRE IF YOU DONT” -Red Son

“Gods fucking damnit peaches I’m going to kill you,”

.

-When MK fights demons he often ends up rambling about whatever he can think about in order to organize his thoughts, balance stress/nervousness, and in general throw off the enemy. This leads to some... interesting interactions w/ them lmao.

Red Son (we’re considering Spicynoodles cannon bois) finds this endearing but also extremly annoying. Especially while he’s trying to chase MK down he can’t stop hearing 

“Okay so yeah anyway as I was saying, there was this moment where he actually tries to kill himself but in a moment of- OH SHIT THAT’S HOT STOP TRYING TO SHOOT FIRE AT ME DUDE- in a moment of realization that he was being manipulated he jumps into a lake instead of hitting the ground-”

So... that’s something

-Extension to that: the only demon that does something other than try and kill him whenever he starts rambling is Macaque. Which sounds weird, but considering that back when Macaque and Wu Kong were still friends he would do this all the time, Macaque actually indulges MK in his ramblings. 

Like MK would start talking about the plot of some movie he saw the other day- mention sponges and Macaque would be like 

“Y’know kid it’s literally the weirdest thing that you humans use dead plants as a way to- what clean dishes? I mean just use a cloth it’s not that hard. Apparently sponges used to be made from coral I heard over the TV a couple days ago-”

“WHAT? Nuh-uh you’re lying we don’t use coral for sponges- AH DUDE CHILL OUT YOU ALMOST CRUSHED MY SKULL THAT TIME!”

“Oops, too bad I was a few centimeters off- anyway yeah I didn’t believe it earlier but if I think about it back in the old days we used to use moss all the time to get a cloth wet in order to wash shit since it stores water well so it wouldn’t be that far off-”

-Extra extra to this: one day Wu Kong stumbles into one of MK and Macque’s fights since he was in the area and all- and hears them hotly debating the credibility of some of Wu Kong’s adventures.

Mk while running for his actual LIFE:

“Okay I hear what you’re saying Macaque, but there is NO WAY Monkey King ate through those clothes that quickly! They would’ve opened the box already-“

Macaque while scanning the rubble to look for MK:

“Kid you have no idea what you’re talking about: I was THERE, dude. I was right there when it happened-“

Mk: “NUH UH that’s not in any of the books!”

Macaque: “YOU THINK SOME RANDOM HISTORIAN KNOWS I WAS STALKING THE GROUP AT THAT TIME!?”

Wu Kong: “You were WHAT”

Etc.

.

-Another one where everyone’s on the ship:

Sandy made a playlist that’s HUGE and plays it on shuffle on the speakers everyday. Usually it’s a bunch of like- 80′s music- idk how to describe it except for music you’d listen to while smoking a cigarette while it’s raining and looking out your window

Basically I’m aiming to say it’s really chill music

Anyways when this song comes on both Macaque and Wu Kong happen to be on the deck at the same time, and they ended up sitting down and reminiscing on all types of stupid shit they did in the past. 

It eventually became a ritual so whenever they hear the beginning of the song they drop everything they’re doing and make a beeline for they’re spot on the very edge of the ship so they can be only deities and brag about

“OH MY GODS remember back in the old days how-”

“Haha ‘back in the old days’- you sound like an old man, Peaches”

“Shut the hell up, Macaque I do not,”

“Uh huh, whatever helps you sleep at night 姥爷 ”

(姥爷 is basically saying old grandpa- a double insult to Wu Kong’s age in this context lol)

.

-Macaque really wanted to learn how to play an instrument at some point because he saw the weird human thing make noise (that slightly bothered him because of his sensitive hearing but he brushed it off-) and wanted to try it.

The first thing he ever picked up was a bell. 

The attempt ended with him curled up on the ground clutching his ears to just stop the ringing- he threw away the blasted copper piece of trash why were his ears still ringing?

He tried again with a Guqin since it makes an actual melody instead of being a percussion instrument but..,,,

He plucked a single string and feeling the vibration along with the intense sound overwhelmed him and he had to jump away from the thing to keep himself from throwing it across the field.

Yeah, Macaque stays away from instruments even though he actually was interested in learning how to use one.

-If you take this into account s3e8 is just so much sadder *cries*

.

[verbosebabbler]

ZampanioSim North About Newsposts: ZampanioSim North

I'm currently retracing my steps through the game with the new tools I have. Anything I find won't be added to my main document until I get enough to make the change substantial. It'll be v.2. at that point. But until then, I will list all my findings separately here.

These are newsposts that I found in the code. Debugger > farragofiction > ZampanioSimNorth > static > js > About.tsx

I tend to not add these to the main document as it feels more like notes meant for the creator's, programmers, and othersuch and not the participating audience. But It's important to at least archive them somewhere. The notes are here below the tab from 04/15/2021 - 10/19/2021

"04/15/2021", "i feel...tentatively hopeful about this project? maybe it goes nowhere but this is my first creative work since the pandemic started so *shrugs*. i'm just happy to be MAKING something. plus im kinda burnt out on homestuck???  and this Zampanio thing is...well i don't wanna spoil the creepypasta faq if you haven't read it yet. i just feel myself spinning up a new obsession is all."

"04/18/2021", "ugh. why did I decide a skill tree was so vital to this simulation? it's HARD to get it looking right rip. but skills are obvs important to actual Zampanio so what can i do. plus its absolutely hilarious seeing things like 'Book Beam' get generated"

"05/22/2021", "stats exist now, just copying from wigglersim cuz why wouldn't i. s'not like the actual Zampanio is clear on how stats are"

"06/01/2021", "shareable urls are a thing because i have a problem and the problem is wanting ppl to be able to share urls. this might TECHNICALLY violate the personalization requirement for Zampanio but...i mean. its me. i can't NOT make shareable urls.", "plus this way i can make custom sessions"

"06/02/2021", "lol i just realized what appeals to me so much about Zampanio. its kinda like House of Leaves meets Polybius? (however you spell that). i wonder if that makes the [REDACTED] the ~minotaur~?", "srsly i just freaking love that creepypasta faq so much"

"06/03/2021", "happy birthday OB, the achievement system just went live. its on the third too which is just perfect. i already was using 3 as an arc num in here. hey ,neat, all the numbers are divisible by 3 on OBs bday.", "i should do something with this..."

"06/06/2021", "finally making other menu screens, got statistics and achivements in. its weird, theres a lot more work than id think for just a simple simulation", "its because i cant keep my damn nose out of adding secrets everywhere and putting a frankly absurd amount of work into set pieces designed to make twists punch harder"

"06/08/2021", "im love. rage mode is everything i hoped it would be. absolute perfection. maybe i should call it headache mode? its just. its breath taking. beautiful. im the smartest damn human.", "i just really am a fan of things appearing to be one thing, revealing themselves to be a completely seperate thing, but if you think about it never weren't the first thing too."

"06/13/2021", ":) :) :)", "oh man im feeling so smug right now about what happens even in normal mode"

"06/16/2021", ":) :) :)", "https://www.reddit.com/r/TheMagnusArchives/comments/nzz96g/this_notspiral_perfectly_represents_spiral_in_my/"

"06/19/2021", "wastes can hack now (both in game wastes and real ones)", "if you're a real waste you don't need me telling you how to hack, g'luck ;) ;) ;)"

"06/20/2021", "finally got the skill tree to center itself omg why was that so hard"

"06/23/2021", "mess up bg but softly"

"06/27/2021", "50% less homestuck", "look this is just where i am right now, caring more about creepy pastas then sburb"

"06/29/2021", "menu items actually can be unlocked upgraded but not everything is implemented yet obvs"

"07/01/2021", "music!!!", "i especially love how terrible and upsetting the rage mode music is"

"07/03/2021", "just truth mode :) :) :)", "basically its a reference to Just Monika and a few other things"

"07/06/2021", "can use the skill tree to upgrade menus finally"

"07/10/2021", "working on gaslighting word meanings", "my fav part of this is i keep forgetting i did it and i get upset/confused that 'quests' are now called 'dogs' or something"

"07/11/2021", "standardizing OBs voice. they deserve more than just being AB but meaner."

"07/13/2021", "as the false bg moves around the true mirrors OBs thoughts"

"07/15/2021", "it is physically impossible to create a shitty world and NOT be a sociopath", "turns out the easiest way to make party members is to lobotomize a fully realized player"

"07/18/2021", "really like how i did the gods screen", "honestly everything about this project is ridiculously self indulgent. i don't actually expect many ppl to enjoy it but...its really fun to make??? it brings me joy to try simulating such a weird creepypasta.")

"03/30/3031", "i have finally implemented spiral/sand"

"07/22/2021", "hunting is no longer associated with clowns", "did i go out of my way to leave the 'bug' in for weeks just so i could mirror the faq bug? yes. ofc i did. theres just something so surreal about being issued a clown wig and a bicycle horn when you ask how to kill deer"

"07/23/2021", "THE END IS NEVER THE END", "we're really in it now"

"07/24/2021", " the Thief of Beef is now possible. that is all there is to say on the matter.", "rereading old newspost and srsly its surreal to see any even tangentially mention the pandemic? if i'd seen something like that in a dev log two years ago i would have assumed it was part of an arg or some shit and not just like 'ah yes that period of literal years where eveyone wore masks and reassured everyone about quarantine procedures any time they mentioned leaving the house'.

"07/25/2021", "the Thief of Beef is no longer mandatory for all party members to emulate", "haha whoops"

"08/02/2021", "okay so maybe game like activity is possible but i do not recommend it the ~~minotaur~~ gets pissed if you wander into its labrynth", "if you do it its on your end"

"08/03/2021", "dammit AW just let me know that the faq link is dead... gonna try to see if its cached somewhere (is it old enough for waybackmachine to find it???), if anybody sees anything related to it send it my way, i *swear* im not crazy this is a real thing", "also shoutout to 'craig researcher' which a scammer just let me know 'died' adn probably left me a huge fortune"

"08/05/2021", "one good thing about ZampanioSim getting leaked early is that I found out that firefox freaking *hates* fuckUpBGButSoftly. my beloved. why. ", "at least Truth no longer hates firefox with an unending rage"

"08/08/2021", "eyes and spirals are illegal, i thought you should know. and claiming the menu isn't a menu is equally illegal. maybe more illegal tbh", "maybe i should make like, a youtube guide showing why"

"08/14/2021", "how can eyes be real if mirrors aren't real? so anyways i made mirrors real just in case", "also truth is more true than it was before via being less true than it was before. its okay."

"08/15/2021", "Spiders can wear hats now.", "also, I guess if you care about that sort of thing, you can now be killed horrifically by monsters. well. just the one monster. it follows you around and even if you can kill it it just comes back slightly different. don't worry about it."

"08/16/2021", "time is now officially hard", "in addition to being the shittiest aspect it just is difficult to form. its difficult to follow without a proper mind"

"08/19/2021", "lets all regret having eyes together, shall we?"

"08/24/2021", "look i don't know how or why found footage is a part of the zampanio experienceyar. i just know i feel really proud of how i worked that part of it in."

"08/25/2021", "new avatar who this", "my fav part of this new design is it implies my lack of face was *always* a coiled spring, i just chose not to uncoil it"

"08/29/2021", "skills are real now but only if you're willing to blaspheme against the concept of simulations", "i personally wouldn't recommend blasphemy"

"08/31/2021", "theres something calming about actually getting to see what the skills do, finally. fun fact: its nothing", "shoutout to the late coleman researcher who definitely left me some money according to this scammer"

"09/13/2021", "starting to get desperate about finding that FAQ. the forums mostly seem dead, so I'm gathering up whoever I can find in a discord server to try to follow the breadcrumbs.", "Note to self: post link to discord once this goes live."

"09/21/2021", "bad news: still haven't managed to find that FAQ. good news: guess who just managed to get their hand on an *actual copy of zampanio*???", "Shout out to that weird dead zampanio server for somehow embedding it in a powerpoint???”

"09/25/2021", "things are really starting to come together!!! polish is continuing, a few more secrets!!!" :) :) :)

"10/05/2021", "trying to herd the spiders in here before Halloween. my plan is, no matter the state of the sim, to 'go live' before then.  i get the feeling i'll be working on this sim for the rest of my natural life (quite happily, don't get me wrong) so no sense in waiting for it 'to be done'!!!", "i still wanna add the quest system, maybe unlockable titles instead of them being default, maybe that lore screen i keep promising, you know, the basics. but also THE END IS NEVER THE END and all so there will always be things to add. you should add things too. on a03. on the wiki. anywhere fan works go. maybe if enough of us are making zampanio works we can shake loose what happened to that faq? or play it ourselves? Zampanio is a very good game. You should play it."

"10/19/21", "realized its kind of a dick move to throw wastes at 'infinite spiralling secrets' without even a hint of a guide (shame AB couldn't join us over here), so made my traditional gigglesnort hideytalk riddlefuckery checklist. going to start herding people in here proper.  shout out in the meantime to the Herald, the Scribe, the Weaver and the other Unmarked who found their way in even before I started herding, btw."

[slightlyrebelliouswriter23]

https://matthewfairchildfanclub.tumblr.com/post/622613826051932160/okay-im-ranting-because-i-started-re-reading-the

What do u think about this? I'm kinda struck. I didn't read it that way? It didn't feel ooc to me? I am just stunned how many ppl agree with this because...thar entire thing was cardan and jude being dumb and sad and... Jude is a strong protagonist and ever scheming and persistent but she's...like human? She has feelings and is allowed to be sad??? Idk it's just strange to me

okay first thing's first: i'm not trying to start beef with OP (or anyone who agrees with OP). that is their opinion. they're allowed to have it. Jude and Cardan aren't real, but the person on the other side of that blog is.

second. i really only briefly skimmed the post because, honestly, it's the same argument i've seen everyone who doesn't like QON make. they think because Jude wouldn't burn down villages to get back into Elfhame after having her heart broken, she is, therefore, OOC.

let me tell you why i, personally, disagree with that statement. (TW: discussion of mental health and dissociation under the cut)

i'm going to split this into two parts. one is more anecdotal and the other is more character based.

as you point out, nonnie, Jude is strong. she is fierce, she is determined. but again, she is human. with human feelings. teenage human feelings, at that.

anyone who is not convinced Jude would feel pretty shit for a while after going through her first heartbreak is either too old to remember the rollick of teenage emotions mixed with the legless lord of young love, or they've simply never had their hearts broken before.

if the first, they're looking at Jude's situation with years of maturation behind them, years Jude doesn't yet have at that point. i think people forget this sometimes. Jude is just a teenager. and they probably want her to keep fighting because it's what they didn't do, but wished they had.

if the latter..... oh, my sweet summer child.

when i was young and in love (kind of) and then suddenly had everything ripped away from me within the span of a month, i honestly couldn't tell you what happened that summer. because i don't remember. i was backpacking but all i remember is sleeping well into the afternoon almost every day. lashing out at my friends for stupid shit. not eating. taking every chance i could get to isolate myself. being fine one moment, then in the next feeling like i was going to burst into tears out of nowhere. i had my first dissociative episode. it lasted for three days.

now, i'm probably not as scary as Jude. but i'd like to think i'm stubborn and spiteful enough to warrant some shadowy semblance. what i became was not who i or anyone else wanted or expected me to be. i wanted to be angry and rage and seek revenge, but i couldn't. people expected me to get over it, but i didn't. i was just stuck in this awful liminal place.

heartbreak isn't a single moment where your heart is shattered and then you immediately begin to pick up the pieces. that's unrealistic. heartbreak shatters you and then steals what's left away into a dense fog and laughs as you fumble around blindly on your hands and knees, searching for the lost pieces of yourself.

so, as nonnie pointed out, it is okay for Jude to be sad. it is more than okay. it's what we should expect.

okay, now on to my character based argument. to me, anyone who has this interpretation of QON has severely misjudged Jude's character throughout the series as a whole.

it's true, Jude might put on the facade of tough scary lady with sword–and sure, to a certain extent that is part of her. but Jude is not inherently wicked or menacing or unforgiving, even if she can be at times.

just because we can be a thing doesn't mean we are that thing. mere adjectives simply do not have the breadth to define us, your honours. we exist in multitudes, or however the fuck that Walt Whitman quote goes.

i'm not going to comb through the entire series for moments where Jude is not scary or menacing because, frankly, there are a lot. if you're not actively looking for the moments where she is terrifying, i think you'll see her kindness, her gentleness, even at times her grace, quite plainly.

i'd also like to point out that the times in which Jude is any of those scarier things are all when she is literally terrified for her life. it's a survival tactic. be scared or be the scariest thing in the room. easy choice from where i'm standing.

now in terms of Jude's exile, Cardan is a little dumb here, but not in the fanon himbo Cardan way. just in the normal "dude madly in love" way. by exiling her to the mortal world, he thought he was giving her what she wanted: safety and a clever riddle to solve. because she can't break, right?

he also sent her away for selfish reasons. her safety was more absolute in the mortal world and he couldn't risk losing her again. plus, he wanted to show off his cleverness, smug prick that he is.

but what Jude actually wanted were the things he promised her in his vows: to be the Queen of Elfhame, and, ultimately, him. she wanted a place to call home and Cardan by her side. he took the only things she truly desired in the world away from her by exiling. so yeah, homegirl has every right to be sad.

to close, i think people with this perspective of QON have the same view of Jude as Cardan once did, and it comes from a place of well-intentioned misunderstanding. he thought she could not break. so did the anti-QON crowd.

they were wrong.

–Em 🖤🗡

more thoughts on Emotional!Jude

more theories & analysis

[jabberjawjade]

Nicky discovers lingerie, specifically from the 21st century

This is gateway anon who frequent anonymous-eggy's blog

hi! i've seen you around but i haven't read any of your posts or anything. anyway, it's nice to meet you 💗

warning: 18+ only | minors dni

He didn't know that lingerie could be so revealing and sexy. He's seen ppl in it before but it wasn't like this. The colors didn't really call out to him. The cuts and hems have never shown so much skin. He was used to silk but lace? All over?

When he looks at you, it gives him a fever. He feels hot all over, especially in the face. He can feel himself hardening while his eyes scan you up and down.

"You really do somethin' to me, toots."

"Is that good or bad?"

"A little bit of both."

Expect a lot of praise, compliments, all that. While he does this, he'll roam his hands over you. More specifically, the favorite parts of your lingerie. Whether it's the straps on the sides of your underwear or the lace detailing of your bra. Oh and he's painfully slow as he drags his fingertip over every little thing.

He def has his favorite pieces that he likes to see you in. Imagine him teasing you while you two are out. He'll lean over and whisper "You should put on that little red number when we get home." Whenever he does this, he'll pull you closer so he can kiss your temple.

Would he take it off before railing you? I think it depends on what you're wearing and what ya'll are doing. After foreplay, he would try to remember to strip you down but sometimes he gets ahead of himself {normally, he does take everything off though}. This is when you'd hear stitches popping or seams ripping 👀

I think seeing you in at least one piece of lingerie while doing you, just does smthn to him. The sight of you unraveling already does smthn to him but when you wear modern lingerie it just drives him crazy.

I feel like he would undress you using his mouth.. maybe it's just me but he'd bite the straps of your underwear {if you were wearing any atm} and look at you while dragging them down your leg.

Whether or not he's a boob or butt guy, he'll be touching both. If your chest were covered he'd try to grip you over the fabric but he needs to feel your skin in his hand. The same goes if you're bottom is covered as well. At first, he'll slip his hand underneath the fabric but he'll end up taking it off or just leaving it on depending on how hot and bothered he is.

He would have at least one sexy picture of you in lingerie. This would be a more personal and intimate moment between the two of you so he'd learn how to handle a camera. He wants to take the pictures himself and savor the moment. After the photography session, he couldn't resist you - you two def did it and then some.

I think he would be open to trying some lingerie as well. You may have to help him pick what to wear at first. After a while, he would pick up on what you like. Ofc, when he wears the lingerie for the first time it's a surprise. He sneaked off after you two had dinner and you found him sprawled out in your bed.

He glanced up at you with a smirk "Do you have room for dessert?"

pounce on his ass plssss 😫

Overall, he really loves modern lingerie whether it's you or him wearing it. Seeing you in it is enough to get his mind racing. Tease him when you're out. Say you're wearing it underneath and see what he does. Wtv you two were originally doing has become less important.

BONUS ⭐: I think he'd be on the lookout for new things a lot. Especially if mc knew how to sew or had great fashion sense. If he saw a pattern he knew you'd like, he'd take a sample and bring it home to you.

[yvningshowers]

My moots as songs bc why tf not and bc my love is annoying duh

Find yourselves... below the cut...

Going in alphabetical order by ur url so u can find yourselves faster LMFAO

@cyancherub

CASSIE. Hi boo how r ya boostie yes hello bet you weren't expecting this LMFAO but... regardless I bestow upon you... ugh YOUR MUSIC TASTE IS SO DIFFERENT FROM MINE ALDNOWJD but I think... I'm going with

Jidenna's Sufi Woman... dear god it's so good. Ur a bruja a lil it's true LMFAO and I LOVE that about you qojfiwjdow

OH AND idk this is like... idk. this. yeah.

@hajimoon

KRIS QOFJOWNEOR ok ok ok.... HEH I'm excited ok ok here goes:

La Santa Cecilia's Como Dios Manda (sing it to Momo.... I triple dog dare you... no ovaries u won't...) and Girl in Red's We Fell in Love in October if I am off... if the vibes are off... I'm gonna jump off a cliff Kris ok just tell me I did a good job and that I'm a good friend ok LMFAOOO

@izuukii

hey Scout know ur away from the platform! Just wanna say kiss and also I give you, since you've called your music taste pretentious LMFAO I don't think it is I think it's GREAT but I thought you might like a small hometown band heh so! I've got

Escapism by Pastime, a group from my old tiny ass hometown. Mad that this is the only song of theirs that I like RIP. It makes me feel nostalgia, and your pieces always do that to me

OH AND PANIC AT THE DISCO'S this. The title is too long 💀 but it gives me "I'm the shit" vibes and. I mean. I would hope you feel like that DAILY. AS YOU SHOULD.

@jozhenji

ANDYYY. Ok. Uuuuh. I... get thine vibes. I think. But I also don't think our music tastes line up AOHDOQJQO I am trying so hard. But a Bernadette Banner fan... might be a Florence + the Macine fan? Maybe? Oh gosh yeah this was hard

I give you Lady Gaga's Hey Girl? Oh this was HARD but this is one of my favs of all time

Or maybe Hozier's Jackboot Jump? Feel like ppl who enjoy sewing just are rebels at heart are we not? LMFAO

@katsupeach

Ah yes...... Emme. HM. I will say dear I'm not quite sure our music taste lines up. I do think yours is superior. LMFAO. So I will... try hard. Try very hard. Yes.

I am ALWAYS listening to Ella Fitzgerald's Someone to Watch Over Me and you're gonna look at me and tell me you DON'T meet a certain pro hero somewhere where this song is playing distantly and they see you and fall so hard they break their heart wide open? Yeah OK bud SURE

Oh and Sabrina Claudio's Problem With You when I heard this song first it put me in a TRANCE aodjoqjdow basically like how your writing does to me so there's that... yeah

May I... submit to you x and x OH and x just for fun which I think... maybe you may enjoy? Perhaps? Mayhapse? Heh

@kenzumekodma

AURELIA QODJOQJDPW ok ok... I do NOT think our music taste lines up idk why I just get that vibe? (THOUGH I DID LISTEN TO FUN'S SLEIGH RIDE ON DEC 1ST AND IT WAS SO GOOD) so I'm... this might be a miss ok and I'm SORRY but also the song makes me think of u ok so pity me fren for my doodoo music taste

Cleo Sol's Why Don't You. I DON'T KNOW WHY!?!?!? U just give me these vibes. I'm... it's so weird LMFAO like... very chill but full of passion? Bro that makes no sense LMFAO just ignore me 💀

@killerdabi

Vey..... hmmm hm hm hm. I get very... chaos bi vibes. And in that way we are very similar HEH so here goes...

Ashnikko's STUPID I mean... if I'm way off apologies my dear but you do CERTAINLY give me "I don't fucking need you... but stick around ur fun" vibes qijdoqjsoqj

BUT BECAUSE WE ARE CHAOS BI. Also Sza's Normal Girl... I COULD BE WRONG AGAIN BUT LIKE. Sad bi hours do tend to happen often to the disaster bi LMFAO.

@melodramaticmatter

Hehehe... Grace.... your music taste is a mystery to me LMFAOOOO so I'm going with songs that just make me think of you... idk ok this is like... might be a miss and I'm sORRY AOEJWIJDIW

Emiliana Torrini's White Rabbit... I just think you're a protagonist LMFAO and this song give me edgy protagonist vibes... everyone hated sucker punch FINE but at least the soundtrack had THIS banger

Oh and also Jolene but specifically Miley Cyrus' cover bc your voice reminds me of hers... do not perceive me....

@mindninjax

The great.... grand Quie. Quirasol. Marquie. Jax. THIS ONE WAS HARD I don't think our music tastes line up exactly but I'm trying SO HARD HERE AODJOQJD

I give you Allen Stone's Brown Eyed Lover... like... yeah. Yeah yeah yeah. One of my all time songs I will love it until the day I die. Your are also brown eyed and everyone loves you. Damn that's crazy hmmm it suits you so well hmmmmm

And Lianne La Havas' Never Get Enough of You. It's acoustic guitar...ish??? Or so you would THINK but then it has a little (a LOT) bit of kick in it that just like... it's raw. It's so raw. God I love it. Feel like ur soft and intense at the same time which REALLY I think fits this song

AND Pepe Aguilar's Me Estoy Acostumbrando a Ti shhh it's pretty and romantic and in spanish shhh

@moonmayhem

JACKS. I'm not gonna lie my good friend. This is gonna be hard. LMFAO. I like... I can just tell your music taste is v nuanced and it is SCARY LMFAO so if this is a miss... apologies I just want you to know I think you're so cool skdjqojdow

Going with... Billie Eilish's When I Was Older AND Pecos Hank's Sinful Refrain... I have no explanation they just both give me very you vibes. They're cool songs and you're cool IDK QOJWIEHIQHW I CAN'T STRESS THIS ENOUGH I THINK YOU'RE FUCKING SICK and I think the songs match ur vibe a lil if I'm wrong... just end me fam just kill me

@omiishii

Ah yes.... Junie.... hm. Idk ur music taste... at all really but you are... so soft. Here are my softest songs. I gib u kith. U r precious.

Peter Collins' Love Like and Love Like You from Steven Universe YES THE TITLES ARE SIMILAR bc the vibes of both are soft and lovely, like you... what can I say 😭

@patchworkpuzzle

QOHDOWHE PATCHY. Oh dear oh me oh my. Ok. Ok ok ok. Gonna be honest from our vibes alone... we have different music taste I THINK and I'm almost gonna guarantee that this is gonna be a miss but no matter! I lob u and will still do my best 😭

@prettyboykatsuki

Nina Simone's Black Is The Color Of My True Love's Hair (hm what Color is Sero's hair again? I forget...) it's a song FULL of love and adoration like u but it's kind of... spooky and magical which I think also suits you fren idk if I am wrong... I will gladly take the guillotine 😔

@petersparkle

Ah yes... my good, sweet, kind Sparkle... our music taste? Could align! Could not! I've no clue my good friend BUT I have prepared for you... songs that give me the most bestie and bubbly of vibes... bc you give me bestie vibes and so HERE WE GO SIWJSISI

Two Door Cinema Club's Something Good Can Work has an intro that kills me every SINGLE time and it makes me feel so giddy and qojdoqjso so do u so this BUT ALSO

Chloe x Halle's Babybird yo this track... one of my EXTREMELY underrated favs and for SOME REASON you remind me of Hawks aodjwiid and so does this track. It's a liiiittle adgy, and I feel like ur also a lil edgy heh

AND FINALLY. I see you with the Shouto pfp. I sense... u may be down for a lil sadness but not too much! Well look no further than madisenxoxo's Baby In Blue it makes me think of Shou... it really does but in a good sad way

Um so um this is. Here. Mali Music's Loved by You. This... it suits ur vibe I think Ari I just think it does like just full of love and care u kno? hope you have a nice day and hope u like the song we are new moots! So this might be off qkejqojiw apologies my good sir... a sweeping bow apology

@scummy-simp

LENNIE QOJDOQJ ok so deadass I was saving you for last and then... forgot 💀 BUT IT'S BC 1) I'M AN IDIOT and 2) bc I feel like we're similar as people which is BAD bc that either means we have the exact same music taste or it's the COMPLETE OPPOSITE (good test of that... do you like country bc I HATE it) SO. I'm going with two that HOPEFULLY you like dear god aodjqjjsjs I hope you like them if not I'm gonna crawl in a cave and be eaten alive by like. fleas idk

The Internet's Hold On and Ari Lennox's Shea Butter Baby they're both... absolute bangers and they make me FERAL AODJOQJA so I hope u like them... bc I think u r... a little feral too LMFAOOO

[missguomeiyun]

Homecooking [Oct ed]

What’s up everybody?!

Slightly more homecooking content in this month’s post. .. as we transition to fall (& winter), noodle soups will be occupying more space in these posts xD

Udon noodles with chicken breast & napa cabbage. Used Knorr chicken broth as soup base.

Ddeok-guk, which is Korean (flat) rice cake soup. I added some dumplings & baby bokchoy in.

Sujebi + chayote in leftover chicken soup. .. & hard-boiled egg. This was my breakfast post-night shift.

Sujebi dish #2 . .. This one in fish cake broth + zucchini. Also very light, but very tasty! 

Sujebi dish #3 . .. I call this the “leftover hot pot special”. I don’t know about you, but when we have hot pot, we always over-prepare foods, so there’s always leftover defrosted proteins & seafood, as well as veggies. The next day, we either have another hot pot or we use the leftovers & throw it all in a pot to make a ‘soup’. This sujebi was made with the soup so it contains: chicken, frozen seafoods, napa cabbage, & some fish balls/tofu. I usually do this with my fav thick rice noodles but I had an opened bag of sujebi, so I used sujebi. Any noodle works.

Sujebi #4 . .. lol bcos I have to use up my sujebi.

Cucumber + egg stir-fry

Leftover yookgaejang with thick rice noodles. AHHH SO GOOD!!!!

This doesn’t look pleasing but I swear it was good! At the beginning of the month, my mom had prepared (ie: de-boned) chicken drumsticks, where she separated the bone from the meat but kept the meat ‘together’ in one whole piece as she deboned. We had plans to use the portable BBQ outside for the chicken thigh fillets; however plans changed. .. we didn’t do that. Instead, I used the chicken fillet pieces to make fried chicken ^^ I didn’t bother cutting the pieces into smaller pieces so that’s why they’re in such large chunks haha

Cheongguk-jang soup. Cheongguk-jang is an extra fermented soybean soup. It’s more savoury & has a greater depth of flavour profile compared to the regular soybean soup (the doenjang). As I’ve mentioned in the past, after trying this since. .. 2yrs ago, I now can’t really go back to doenjang anymore. That almost seems too bland to me. Cheongguk-jang typically includes the common ingredients like onion, zucchini, pork, tofu. .. I skipped the meats & just used zucchini, onion, & napa cabbage. The soup turned out very well!

I fried pork cutlet for the first time. I’ve fried chicken many times but not pork cutlet. I left it frying for soooo long bcos I was scared the pork wouldn’t be cooked thoroughly haha the sauce on the side is just a mix of bbq sauce with ketchup.

*that ripped off part was the 30% off sticker :P

This was a very interesting dip. .. it was heavily garlicky & a little spicy. I didn’t get much “Mexican spice” out of it, which was slightly disappointing but I still was ok with it.

I had the dip around for literally dayyyyyyyysss. It’s quite heavy & salty. It doesn’t really go with anything else I eat normally. So I used it as a pasta sauce. It looks more yellow than it really is IRL. The photo makes it look like that Kraft Dinner ‘fake’ cheese colour but it’s really not! I cooked this late at night for lunch the next day so the lighting is not great. It was alright. Made good use of the dip.

Random Korean snacks I still have lying around my house. .. expired, but still tasty!

I was munching on the above snack & reading a webtoon called MONEY GAME for about 10 days in October. You guys should read it. The length isn’t too long. I found some parts lagged a little bit, but overall, I really enjoyed the series. It’s surprising to me that it was released Squid Game. They shall similar themes - namely a group of ppl in a closed setting interacting with each other, & they play a “money game” for the grand prize.

This is a cheaper way of having naengmyeon - buy the noodles & broth separately instead of the kit! Hmart had 2 types of broth. I’ll try the other one next time, but this beef-based broth was delicious. I found 1 soup serving for 1 noodle serving a bit off, as in there was more soup. In the future, I’ll likely use 1.5 noodles for 1 soup. I haven’t figured it out yet... The noodles are individual ‘servings’ but they’re not individually wrapped so I separated the 10 servings & put them into ziploc bags myself (& froze them).

PLAIN CHEESE RAMYEON~

Another ramyeon I ate this month bcos that’s my quota lol Used up leftover hot pot materials.

Imitation flat bread using naan. Toppings: corned beef, cherry tomatoes, Babybels, & garlic seasoning. This was gooooood!

That is it~

Sorry for the slightly late post.. . been busy lately. I’ve been watching badminton & gahhhhh Short Track 22/23 season has officially started with the 1st stop in Montreal this past wknd. Super exciting stuff!!! Salt Lake City in a few days :D

PS: I’m sad Choi Min Jung didn’t get gold. .. Same with Lee June Seo =(  Hopefully in Salt Lake City!

[omniscientoranges]

let me help (since you’re already half my heart)

okay, I take it that some people wanted a continuation of the fic idea I had in this reblog. I, personally, wanted to not do my homework. This worked in everyone’s favor here (except for my grades).

15x20 fix-it rewrite of Dean’s death scene - Cas saves the day edition

[AO3]

"I need you, I need you to tell me it's okay," Dean begs, holding Sam's gaze please tell me I can go you have to tell me or I won't be able to, "You tell me it's okay."

Sam swallows hard and opens his mouth to respond, "Dean, it's-"

"No, it's not."

Sam jumps at the interruption, Dean slowly slides his eyes past Sam's shoulder. He knows that voice. Fuck, does he know that voice. Guess Jack must've pulled him out after all.

"It's not okay, Dean," Cas says, stepping around Sam. "You're not going anywhere, not yet, not if I have any say in it."

"Cas," Dean whispers, looking at him like he's a welcome ghost, "You real?"

"Of course I'm real," Cas affirms, or, reaffirms, as it were. What about all this is real. We are.

Dean looks awestruck, not all there enough to try to hold back the stars in his eyes that always come from looking at Cas. Cas, for his part, does hold back - he's got a job to do.

"Sam, I'm going to pull your brother off this-" Cas tilts his head a bit, "large nail, I suppose? Can you support his weight while I heal him?”

Sam nods once, finally, something I can do to help, "Definitely."

"Okay," Cas reaches his hand around Dean's back, "Dean, are you ready?"

"Ready as I'll ever be."

With that, in one swift motion, Cas wrenches Dean free from where he's staked up. Dean lets out an involuntary groan, and Sam's knees buckle slightly before stabilizing. 

Cas presses his hands to the mess of a wound on Dean's back. That's certainly pierced an artery or two, Cas thinks, this will be... more difficult than I thought.

He concentrates, screwing his eyes shut, pushing as much of himself into this as he can. Dean's breathing is erratic, and, horrifyingly, it's starting to get quieter.

"Cas," Sam says, his voice drowned in worry, "Cas, it's not working."

Cas clenches his teeth in something that could only be described as a snarl and rips his hands off Dean. Sam starts to protest before he sees Cas flick his wrist and slip his angel blade down his arm. Cas takes the blade in one hand and cuts a long slice down one palm, then gives the other the same treatment. Pure grace spills out through the cuts, casting shadows and suddenly making Castiel's hands the brightest light source in the room. He moves them back over Dean’s puncture wound. Work, please work, don't do this now, don't let this be when my grace finally fails for good.

Sam and Cas hold their breath, Dean takes out another labored one that could very well be his last, or second to last, or third to last, or-

"It's not enough," Cas shouts. He moves from his position behind Dean and nudges Sam over. He brings his bleeding, glowing hands to Dean's face. "Dean, Dean, look at me. Do you trust me?"

What a stupid question, Cas, "Course, 'course I do."

"Do you know what I'm asking you?"

Oh, oh. Shit. "I- yeah, yes, yes, I know."

Cas nods and leans in, lips slightly parted and hovering a few inches from Dean's. The glowing from his hands dims, and suddenly there's grace floating like smoke, like blood in water, from Cas' mouth - curling into Dean's. Cas' eyes light up a more brilliant blue than they already are, and Dean's half-closed eyes light up the same. It's not clear whether it's Dean or Cas who closes the distance, though realistically, it's probably both of them. Hell of a way to have a first kiss.

Dean feels the tendrils of Cas' grace wrap into him, coil around his soul, seep through his skin and stitch up the ripped muscles in his back. It's strange, Dean's been a vessel for an angel before, but it didn't feel quite like this. It didn't feel... it didn't feel so familiar. It didn't feel like coming home.

Of course it feels like that, though, Dean thinks, it's Cas. That's just what it feels like to be around Cas on a normal day. At that thought, Dean can feel Cas smile slightly against his lips. You feel like home to me too, Dean. You always do. 

Suddenly, or slowly, all at once, or piece by piece, Cas disentangles his essence from Dean's. They part their kiss, and open their eyes to look at each other. They've looked at each other a lot, seen each other a lot, but this is different. Markedly different. Like the universe looked at them and decided to synchronize their heartbeats from this moment forward.

"Are you okay?" Cas breathes out.

Dean lets out a soft laugh, and nods his head.

Cas lets his hands fall from Dean's face and makes way for the crushing bro-hug that Sam pulls Dean in for a second later. He stands off to the side as the two exchange a few words of relief, followed by one, two quick pats on Sam's cheek from Dean and an understanding nod from the former as he turns to walk to the exit. Sam shoots Cas a thankful smile as he walks out of the barn, Cas returns it easily.

After Sam's a good few steps out of earshot, Dean saunters up to Cas, smiling. "That's a- that's a pretty cool trick you got there, Cas."

"Well, I hope you enjoyed it, I'm fairly certain it was my last one."

Dean furrows his brows, "What do you mean?"

Cas drops his eyes to the floor, "I- my grace has been failing for some time, Dean. Saving you just now, I think that was the last of it."

"So, you're tellin' me you're human? Again?"

"It would seem so," Cas says, still not quite meeting Dean's eye, "But-" and there, that's when he finally looks up, "But, I don't think it'll be so bad. Not as long as I have someone to pass the time with."

"Yeah," Dean laughs, moving forward and draping his arm around Cas' shoulders, "Funny you should say that, I think I might know just the guy for the job."

"Hm, I think so too."

- - -

Tagging ppl who specifically asked in the reblogs/comments so you guys get some closure, let me know if you want to be taken off!

@thenightwolf732 - @goblinwritergay - @queer-things-dont-happen-dean - @opinions-nobody-asked-for

[bylertruther]

tw me being a hater, spreading my hateration holleration in this dancery under the read-more 🤡

okay so BEFORE i get sentenced to walk the plank i just wanna say tht i Do like this fic because it's a Good piece of writing. genuinely so. like annoyingly so. like, it's "i struggle with the fact that there are people that write like this for free when so many tv n film writers get paid 398479384 dollars to write complete n total shit" kind of good writing.

ok? ok.

but it is still so like .... funny to me tht of course OF COURSE the One fic tht grinds my gears if i think abt how drastically different the characterization is and how it honestly really and totally kind of features n relies on the antithesis of my sweet baby boy will byers driving the plot forward is the one fic tht everyone like.... loves to fucking bits.

like am i still reading every single update? yes. am i still leaving deranged comments all the time? yes. do i enjoy this fic? yes.

but does it also make me want to bite rip and tear if i think about how that is the way that people view my son will "i cannot be bent or broken + i will survive whatever hell you put me through with nothing but my pure strength of will, courage, and pocket lint without giving up + i will love and hope and remain kind until my dying breath and there is nothing you can do to stop me + selfless and sacrificial to the point of "CLOSEGATE" and giving his toy truck to a girl he didn't know all because she was crying and needed it more even though he knew joyce wouldn't be able to buy him another and confessing his love to the boy he's been in love with forever and veiling it as his sister's feelings just to make him feel better" byers? also yes. very much yesyesyes BIG Yes with a capital Y. it's complicated, but either way i still want to bite ppl over it. (still normal btw)

[httpbryce]

martin del rosario & he/they/any / demi-man ‷ watch out , bryce sirilan has crash-landed into roswell !! they look 32 years old and celebrate their birthday on january 20. they are from bacolod, philippines, reside in tripp’s trailer park and are currently working as bartender @ wild pony. one thing you should know about them is they dress up in drag sometimes at planet 7 (for fun, not work). ‷ ( thia, she/her/they, 20, gmt )

HEY besties i’ve got another muse and i love them very much. info under the cut ( tw for discussions of homophobia and general lgbtphobia )

BASICS

full name: bryce sirilan

age: 32

birth date: january 20, 1990

ethnicity: mostly filipino (hiligaynon and bicolano), some amount of white heritage

sexuality: big bisexual... w/ a leaning towards women / fem ppl

relationship status: single 

languages spoken: hiligaynon (native), tagalog (fluent), english (fluent), bicolano (basic bc his mom never taught him properly)

pronouns: he/they (but they don’t mind other pronouns like she unless ur being a piece of shit and using them to mock him lmao)

bryce is the oldest sibling and would’ve been the golden child. he was smart and reliable and shit. the problem for his family? bryce was sure that they were Not Cishet from a very young age. probably since kindergarten. they did not like that

speaking as a queer filipino, i know that filipinos tend to treat sexuality and gender as interchangeable. if you’re amab (assigned male at birth) and turn out queer in any way (though honestly i’ve seen this concept be applied to effeminate cishet men too), you’re assumed to be a Gay Man.

and there’s nothing wrong with being a gay man ofc. bryce embraced it tbh, it was their first label. they also fit the usual filipino of a camp gay dude.

i mean, when he decided to change his birth name he considered “carey” bc mariah carey and he’s pretty sure he subconsciously ended up using bryce bc it was a subtle nod to britney spears. (bryce siralan does sound a bit like britney spears, doesn’t it?)

but that wasn’t who bryce was. he’d learn that later.

he abandoned his immediate family to follow his supportive aunt to the usa when he was 13ish? so yeah, he grew up here in roswell.

when he was in his late teens maybe, he met ppl who taught him that sexuality and gender are separate. if you ARE a gay man ofc and you’re campy and everything, there’s nothing wrong w/ that! but your gender expression doesn’t inherently determine your sexuality, he learned. and there’s a whole spectrum of lgbtq+ identities

in that period of time, they thought about it and realized that they were nonbinary and bi.

anyway, they could’ve pursued a hotshot career bc they’re brainy but they don’t want that life.

they grumble about their annoying, mundane job at wild pony sure but lowkey they’re very grateful for it!!! yeah sure it’s boring and stressful but it’s part of the charm for him. just being able to live a normal life is good enough for him

they have enough money to leave tripp’s trailer park rn and fend for himself (and just himself, realistically) but doesn’t want to abandon their aunt & cousins.

yeah he likes to dress up in drag and yes his fc has gifs in drag so tune in

he’s honestly more into women but is much more insecure about pursuing them romantically. for reasons he thinks are obvious -- society doesn’t rly expect a (demi-)guy who can walk perfectly in 6-inch heels to be into women at all.

they’d like to explore their attraction to women more, though. they’re attracted to men/masc-presenting ppl too though! and androgynous peeps.

on that 6-inch heels note: bryce is 6′0″, which is tall but not terrifyingly so. in heels he can be as tall as 6′6″ and seeing ppl get intimidated/startled by it makes him happy njansdjasdjn he’s a troll sometimes srry

“certified Best Kisser and thats why i dated him” --testimony from thee @nfldunn​ himself KDMSKNDJN

dating gunner in high school kinda left them with abandonment issues rip </3

anyway that’s all for now! pls do plot with us!

[dastardlydandelion]

So...what kind of horror movie would you write featuring the Hargrove/ Mayfield family? (That you haven't written already lol)

oh boy, u may regret asking me this bc i am indecisive af and i can’t pick just one!

two that i'm actually writing are max as (g is for) ghostface killer in the abcs of neil’s death and also the max + tory nichols werewolf movie fic outlined here. also some more misc gorror junk bc i’m a demon and esp horny for susan wearing blood splatter. but more ideas commence below:

horror movie #1: another creature feature! awhile back @lucdarling sent me an ask abt max + billy hiding smth from susan and her like, playing along, pretending she doesn't know, and one of the scenarios that popped in my head was them keeping a baby bat as a pet. max finds it and she’s only like six or seven, and she thinks it’s going to turn into a vampire. so here is that scenario except horror edition: baby bat is actually a vampire type creature. not rly a vampire like, what’s prolly popping into ur head, like an undead human like dracula or smth, but like a bat monster that sucks blood.

billy being a lil older doesn’t actually think the bat is going to turn into a vampire. he makes fun of max for believing this, but he helps her take care of it anyway bc he thinks it’s cool. susan, like in the non-horror version, knows abt the bat but plays dumb bc she’s feeling a lot of guilt abt max’s difficulty adjusting to the blended fam (as of rn tho, neil has yet to reveal his abusive nature. the red flags are not yet red, more of a brownish maroon, and he is on his best behavior almost all the time, showering susan + max with affection and keeping the swears out of his mouth when he scolds billy in front of them) and knows the lil furry baby makes her happy. she tacitly cleans up after the bat whenever the kids miss a spot (bats poop a lot, dude) and distracts neil, deterring him from discovering it whenever he gets close.

baby bat gets rly big rly fast. and the older it gets, the more it starts to look monstrous. it still has bat features but it’s just like, different. its fangs grow suspiciously long, its hooks grow suspiciously long. its feet are elongated. a dorsal ridge emerges from its spine, spikes at first just flesh but soft fur rather like peach fuzz eventually sprouting. billy catches on that smth is strange abt this animal when it's as long as his forearm after two wks and still growing. he nearly shits a brick when the bat is clinging to his sweater one day and he steps in front of a mirror and only his reflection looks back at him— no bat.

max laughs at him all like, “stupid brother, ofc there’s no reflection. nosferatu is a vampire, vampires don’t have reflections.” 😂

susan catches a glimpse of the thing when nosferatu crawls out of the home max built it in her closet the same wk billy realizes it doesn’t have a reflection, and also almost shits a brick. she doesn’t know what it is, but it’s NOT a fucking bat. not a normal one, anyway! cue a comedy scene where she’s chasing it around the house with a butterfly net and it’s always one flap *ba dum tss* ahead of her, flying just out of reach. she suddenly regrets not getting rid of it sooner, scolding herself for ever allowing her daughter to keep a wild animal.

she can’t catch it. max comes home, susan tells her she needs to get rid of it. max cries, flips her the bird, refuses. billy tho…billy has mixed feelings. he loves nosferatu but he’s worried it’s going to get dangerous. he loves his dad and his dad is dangerous too. he’s stressed out enough, always on edge, knowing that one way or the other, neil is going to hurt him again. he’s already waiting for his dad to hurt him, he doesn’t need the added stress of waiting for nosferatu to hurt him too. and while max is 100% nosferatu’s favorite, it likes billy too. billy’s been handling it since it could fit in the palm of his hand, it trusts him much more than it trusts susan and doesn’t know any different when billy takes it out of the closet when max isn’t around.

billy frees nosferatu at an abandoned farm. there are always bats flying out of the old silo adjacent to the dilapidated barn. while he knows nosferatu isn’t a *normal* bat, it’s still bat like enough that he thinks it might make friends and be happy here…

yeah, that doesn’t stick. before long, nosferatu is feasting on that colony. leeches the blood out of a couple bats nightly. the number of bats increases with nosferatu’s size. meanwhile, max mourns her missing friend. she’s sullen af and won’t speak to susan at all. she thinks susan is the one who got rid of nosferatu. billy never fesses up and susan doesn’t contradict max’s assumption bc she wants the step-siblings to get along.

neil, meanwhile, is getting more comfortable. those maroon flags are slowly but surely brightening to scarlet. he starts sabotaging susan’s plans with her friends, trying to keep her around the house more and more, quietly but steadily eroding her relationships with other people. he’s getting more visibly aggressive when he disciplines billy. he curses him out with a virulent venom that dunks susan’s stomach in ice water and scares max so badly, she runs to susan and hides behind her even though she’s still so mad that susan got rid of her beloved baby vampire.

nosferatu’s appetite surpasses what the bat colony can offer. it’s like the size of a ten yr old human child now. fucker’s big. it doesn’t just have fangs on top, but tusks on bottom. it can’t go out in the sunlight anymore, the sun sears its flesh. it misses max a lot and before, it wasn’t strong enough to fly back to her house. but now it is. it’s extremely strong, actually.

so bc it's hungry, nosferatu grabs a snack along the way. some nameless rando, it swoops down and sucks dry. nourished and much happier, nosferatu makes its way back home. patiently waits outside of max’s bedroom in the moonlight, tapping its hook against the window until she wakes up. initially max is a lil startled— nosferatu looks so different, there’s a beat before she recognizes it— him?? yk, ig it’s male, the og nosferatu was a guy. sure, why not, nosferatu is a boy now.

once she realizes who it is, she is so! happy! max opens the window and embraces her friend. she isn’t freaked out by the blood on its fangs. she’s always known nosferatu is a vampire, albeit, she was thinking he’d look more like dracula than this bat-monster-thingy.

nosferatu moves back into max’s closet. it hangs upside-down from her rod by its weird, elongated feet. we get more shots of nosferatu sucking rando ppl dry at night, tho he remains gentle with max. when max drags billy in to show her he came back, nosferatu is less friendly with him. he’s not aggressive with billy, but he is standoffish. nosferatu’s thought process is somewhere between human and animal. he doesn’t quite cognitively understand that billy took him to the farm with the intent of getting rid of him, but he does understand that the last time he clung to billy, billy left him alone and never came back. max puts two and two together, and realizes it was billy who “stole” her friend. she yells at him a lot, he yells back, she then ices him out.

billy acts out bc he’s upset. runs away, thinks he’s going to find his mom…the cops find him first and call neil. neil is rly embarrassed and pissed abt the whole thing. he breaks down and beats billy in front of the mayfields for the first time. nosferatu smells the blood and it’s time for the main event! we love dead!neil, yes, we do.

nosferatu flies out the closet and right into the living room where billy’s bleeding and teary but biting his lip so they don’t actually fall. susan’s covering max’s eyes but so shocked and tbh, FRIGHTENED, she doesn’t move a muscle beyond that. neil’s got the belt raised, preparing to bring it down again, and nosferatu smashes right into him. neil stumbles, turns back to see this freaky monster looking thing. proceeds to whip the belt at nosferatu. tries to fight him off with the belt and it doesn’t accomplish much beyond pissing him off more— nosferatu, like most classic vampire types, has a healing factor!

max rips her mom’s hands off her face in time to see her pet sink its fangs into her stepdad’s throat. nosferatu sucks neil dry. billy’s a little dazed, not quite frightened. susan is just dead ass frozen, too scared to scream, even. nosferatu crawls over to billy and nudges at him, making sure he’s in once piece and forgiving him in the same go. max darts over and that snaps susan out of her stupor, but she isn’t as fast as our blood-sucking bat monster.

nosferatu stretches his wings out and with a truly impressive wingspan, hugs both of the kids. <3

horror movie #2: a haunting! this one opens with a bang. it’s a tragic horror, beware. we’re in hawkins post s3. billy died at starcourt mall. neil’s obvi had a longstanding abusive mindset and abusive behavior, but he rly takes his grief out on susan and max. mostly susan. she does her best to protect max however she can, whether that means shielding her w her body, sending her out of the house, getting neil’s goat to inspire his ire in max’s place, etc. but sue simply isn’t around all the time and when she isn’t, but max is, well. yk.

one day neil comes home early (bc he lost his job for a violent outburst, tbh) and discovers susan packing a suitcase.

sue fights hard. she rly does. but neil is bigger, heavier, crueler, and to boot, he caught her completely unawares. he kills her. and no, no it’s not some accidental thing where neil makes one bad move rage-blind. he strangles her with his belt. she’s clawing at his arms and making these horrible choked, trapped animal noises. thrashes and twists her body with everything she has trying to get him off but he’s so strong, his grip is unrelenting, and she's growing weaker, lightheaded with the lack of oxygen. strangulation can induce incontinence and when susan blacks out, her piss streams to the hardwood— neil hears that as much as he felt the clawing and heard the noises, even now he could stop, but he doesn’t. he just. doesn’t think his wife has the right to leave him, esp not after his son just did.

neil burns the body and the suitcase in the woods while max is at school. max has been spending as much time as she can (and often with sue’s prompting) outside of the house, so it actually takes her about two days to realize her mother isn’t around. neil tells a pretty convincing story about how susan abandoned them, voice saturated with apology and sorrow. he takes her out for a fancy dinner and promises he’s going to be a better father-- that being a better father is the least he can do now that her mother abandoned her and they are alone in their grief.

max doesn’t know what to think. she’s been preoccupied with her own grief and pain. she finds it hard to believe her mother would just leave her to neil’s wrath. she has a lot of hangups with susan and anger toward her for marrying neil and not getting them out sooner, but she’s also old enough to realize there would be risks involved with that. it’s hard to reconcile the memory of her mother just last wk pinning max to the wall to protect her from neil’s blows with her own bod just abruptly taking off without a word in the middle of the night. but hey, maybe that’s why susan left. maybe she got sick of protecting her, maybe the pain got to be too much and she turned tail.

but also…it’s early october now, abt three months after billy’s death but still fairly warm outside. yet neil is wearing long sleeves. neil never used to button his collared shirts all the way up, and yet. every collar is buttoned. also, mom’s car is still here. why would mom leave without her car?

that ceramic pelican she loved so much is still here too, on the mantle in the living room. it doesn’t seem like the kind of thing she would leave behind, she's had it since max was a baby.

max almost wants to believe neil because she’d rather her mother abandoned her than be dead somewhere, rotting in a storage locker or a hole in the ground. under the earth with the worms, just like billy. max has the worst feeling low in the pit of her gut. she thinks she knows the truth. she thinks abt going to hopper and hesitates bc she’s not sure she could handle it if he actually found smth. or what would happen to her if he did, where she would be sent, who she would end up with.

this movie would be more on the ambiguous end of things. an arthouse horror, if u will.

the days turn into wks and neil is crawling in his skin. the viewer isn’t sure if the shadows he’s seeing, always, always susan-shaped shadows, are of a ghostly nature or if he’s just hallucinating out of guilt. but the signs gradually point to the former— that smth paranormal is indeed going on. bc those scratches and bite marks susan left in his skin?

they do not heal. they do not get infected. they do not become necrotic. but they do not heal, either. days turn into wks and the wounds still look fresh, like she just left them moments ago. neil can’t wear light colors anymore because his wounds weep red into the fabric. he isn’t just seeing susan’s shadows either, he’s smelling her.

he washes his sheets and pillowcases a dozen times and the scent of her shampoo, her lotion, it’s like it’s woven into the fibers. he walks into the hallway and chokes on the aroma of susan’s perfume. he wonders if max is screwing with him, if max figured it out and she’s trying to torture him into a confession. one day he stomps off to max's bedroom, furious, adamant on confronting her. he grabs her doorknob, prepared to yank it open and then lets out a yelp, jerking his hand back with a sudden sharp pain.

it feels like a bee sting (which would be esp bad for this fucker in anything i write, bc i headcanon him as being allergic). but there’s no stinger. no injury. nothing. neil is freaked out enough that he backs down.

max, on the other hand, is getting gentler signs. when she turns the radio dial in the camaro, it’s somehow always her mom’s favorite songs that come thru the speakers. when she goes to pull clothes out of her drawers in the morning, she discovers that the things she’d just shoved inside in wrinkled balls are perfectly folded, neat as a pin, exactly like how susan always folded. susan was always fond of cardinals and suddenly max is seeing cardinals, pretty red cardinals, in just abt erry tree and shrub.

neil wakes up one night to his wife’s voice whispering “boo” right in his ear. he throws the covers off and discovers ashes in the bed. he doesn’t smell susan’s shampoo or lotion anymore, he smells the kerosine he’d poured all over her body.

his wounds still won’t heal. whenever he looks in the mirror, he catches a glimpse of susan walking past behind him, peering at him from her peripheral. he whips around, heart hammering, but there’s never any tangible person there.

max is almost certain her mother is dead at this point. neil’s been so bizarrely nice to her lately. she never believed in ghosts but her experiences with the upside-down broadened her perception of reality. she doesn’t know how else to explain the songs, the cardinals, the folded clothes. the way that these days, whenever she does feel fear toward neil, it just fades away. her fear melts like popsicles in the sun, immediately replaced by the sensation of a warm, maternal hug, as if arms she can’t see are trying to reassure her she truly doesn’t need to be afraid of him anymore.

in fact, max feels so unafraid of neil and brave, that one night she calls him out on it. he’s grizzled and unshaven in his recliner, beer in hand. she steps in front of the television he’s vacantly fixated on and folds her arms across her chest.

“you killed my mom, didn’t you?”

quick as a flash, neil leaps to his feet. he brings his arm back like he’s going to strike her and susan’s ceramic pelican on the mantle explodes into shards. the lights flicker, the television program cuts to snow with a static roar. every other knickknack on the mantle rattles and framed photos tumble off the wall.

neil very wisely lowers his hand. he slumps, boneless. he doesn’t say a word. max sees the answer in his eyes. it’s the dead of night and she snatches the camaro keys off the hook, marching out of the house, slamming the door behind her. it’s the dead of night and she doesn’t care. she’s going to blow past every stop sign and pound on the chief’s door until he opens up. and fuck, i just realized if this is post s3 he’s supposed to be in russia. shit. i don’t watch this show, but i know abt russia bc i DID watch the clips of that demogorgon that i rly hope isn’t stuck in captivity!! okay, but let’s pretend that didn’t happen?

it’s an au?? i mean, errything i write is always technically an au anyway, bc when i write stuff susan has an actual personality and billy isn’t *completely* abhorrent. okay, so it’s an au and mr. hopper didn’t blow up and un-blow up in russia. he’s still here. so max drives to his house.

she pounds on the door so hard this guy snaps outta bed, thinking someone’s trying to bust it down. she tells him neil confessed to killing her mom. it isn’t true, exactly, but he didn’t have to. so it’s a helluva grim drive back to cherry lane, this time in the cop car.

but when they go inside, chief prepared to arrest neil, no need. neil’s hanging from the belt he strangled susan with, shirtless for the first time since that night, erry seemingly fresh furrow and bite mark on full display. below his dangling feet is a map, the area he burned susan’s corpse in circled in red marker. did he kill himself or did the ghost do it?

up to u, we soundlessly cut to credits without a concrete answer to that question.

horror movie #3: crossover special! stranger things meets the chilling adventures of sabrina. sequel to that fic i wrote where susan makes out with lilith, queen of hell, and lilith kills neil for her. sue officially joins the church of lilith. bc in this ‘verse the church of lilith actually happens after caos s2 instead of the nonsense that was s3 and the inconceivably godawful migraine-inducing shit-fest that was s4.

killing neil was lilith’s only freebee. susan isn’t a witch, she’s a mortal, so in order to reap the other rewards of worshipping the one and only mother of demons, she has to fornicate with the witches and participate in the sacrifices!!!

this is, uh, well. it’s p much a porno, dude, sorry. 😅

this is just an excuse for susan to have sex with lilith, zelda, marie, hilda, big witch orgies + susan. witches bathing in the blood of their sacrifices, susan so nervous and timid but unable to deny her desire. the witch’s dressing her in their gothic garb.

how does the rest of the fam get it on this?

max joins the church too. she has more age-appropriate conduct with sabrina and the weird sisters, and what have you. just smooches and over-the-clothes groping, and whatnot, even tho the weird sisters, at least, would be interested in going further if given the opportunity.

billy dies in starcourt again, so he gets revived in the cain pit! hilda is the one who goes to him after bc she’s been in the cain pit many a time (i am still BIG side-eyeing zelda for repeatedly murdering her sister since childhood). hilda understands how jarring it can be to come back. suddenly alive!billy is freaking tf out but she brings him inside the mortuary, wraps him up in a big blanket burrito and they have a talk. hilda explains that he’s going to be okay and rubs his back while he tentatively sips the hot chocolate she made.

after billy’s calmed down, she brings max and susan in. max and susan can’t do as much magic as the caos witches— they’re mortals, after all, it’s not in their nature —but they’ve gained some abilities thru being in the church, following the rituals, and being carnally involved with the immortal witches. max happily shows him some of her new magic tricks.

horror movie #4: another crossover with caos. heavily inspired by creepshow episode s2e1, model kid (which i already v blatantly referenced in the last axe snafu update and i’m not ashamed, bc it’s a good series i love v much).

billy picks max up from the byers’ place rly late one night. it’s dark and the weather is bad and okay, yeh, he might be a little high. and a little concussed. he pissed neil off pretty bad the other day and okay, actually he’s defo concussed bc he doesn’t even remember what he did wrong!

needless to say, they take a wrong turn somewhere. they end up in greendale. at first max is pissed. she yells at him a lot! yells so loud hilda can hear them thru the walls of dr. cerberus’s comic shop/diner. she goes outside to see what all the fuss is abt, hilda never rly ignores youth in need. we love hilda, she deserved so much better…i’m getting distracted, okay, back to the story.

hilda ushers them inside. max is like, “ooh, comics? horror junk and comics? nvm, i’m not mad anymore.” she pats billy’s arm and wanders away to go check stuff out! hilda makes billy sit down. caos canon established that she’s psychic, at least when she wants to be. she smells the weed but she also sees his life, his trauma. billy doesn’t remember what he did to piss neil off or the abuse that followed, but hilda sees it clear as day.

he’s rude and cranky w her when she probes a little too much for his liking. hilda gently but firmly reprimands him and gets him a milkshake on this house. then she goes to check on max. she steers max to a v particular section of the shop, the one that sells model kits. now, max isn’t *huge* into model kits BUT they are p neat and she enjoys them well enough. more so when the weather is nasty and she can’t go outside. or when she needs smth to do with her hands (a trait she shares w susan) to distract herself and ease some of the anxiety when she hears her brother being beaten or her mother being shouted at.

max is actually rly impressed by the array of models. vintage ones and newer ones. monsters, slashers, final girls, tiny accessories like knives and bloodied heads. but when she gets to the paint-your-own shelf, her jaw drops to the floor.

there’s one that looks just like neil. unpainted, plain gray vinyl, but undoubtedly her stepdad. the expression on the five inch figurine is one frozen in fear.

“i think that one’s calling to you,” hilda prompts her, with the softest smile.

max blinks away her bewilderment altho she still can’t speak. she turns to hilda and turns her empty pockets inside out. hilda just waves her hand. she tells her it’s on the house. that it wouldn’t be fair if she gave billy smth on the house, but not max.

speaking of billy, when he finishes his milkshake, he’s suddenly totally sober and healed!! no more high buzzing in his blood. no more pounding headache or concussion fogging his mind. he doesn’t feel his bruises anymore, rolls his sleeve up, and realizes they simply aren’t there anymore. like they dissolved off his skin.

albeit it’s muttered under his breath, but billy does thank hilda. then he and max are on their way. max shows him the suspiciously familiar figurine in the box. this night cannot get weirder.

max knows what to do with the model kit. she does. she isn’t sure how she knows, but she does. she grapples with it for a long time. neil’s the closest thing she has to a dad these days. and things aren’t bad all the time, ofc.

sometimes neil gives max a ride when mom and billy aren’t available. sometimes he brings her ice cream entirely unprompted. neil’s the one who picks max up off the sidewalk when she wipes out super bad on her skateboard, carries her inside and then later to the car when her cut doesn’t stop bleeding and she ends up needing stitches.

but most of the time he sucks. she can’t rly be herself around him. he's indifferent to her interest at best, scornful at worst. he would hate all her friends. he scares the shit out of her when he’s angry. he doesn’t have a problem belittling her mother in front of her, tearing susan to shreds and making her out like she’s lower than dirt, the most worthless person on the planet. doesn’t have a problem beating billy in front of her or glaring at her with the promise that she’ll be next if she dares to voice her dissent.

max doesn’t always want to do what she knows she’s meant to do with the model. bc she's kind at heart and bc on the good days, she genuinely does have mixed feelings toward neil. never enough to hope he'll be better, he's proven he won't...but maybe enough to hope he won't get worse, either.

then comes the night neil breaks ribs. bad, like we’re talking, a-sharp-spear-of-broken-rib-punctures-billy’s-lung-and-he’s-coughing-up-blood-bad. that’s a trip to the emergency room. in the days that follow, at her next dnd meeting w the party, max places the fully and attentively painted model of her stepdad on the table. normally her pals would protest her derailing the intended game, but they can sense it, yk, that smth is different.

max takes over as dungeon master to the protest of no one, all other mouths sealed as if bewitched and spellbound. she narrators a scene where the demogorgon devours neil and uses the demogorgon piece and the model for demonstration.

when max returns home, neil is strewn across the house in gory chunks and torn wallpaper curls around massive claw marks.

[brycesirilan]

martin del rosario & he/they/any / demi-man ‷ watch out , bryce sirilan has crash-landed into roswell !! they look 32 years old and celebrate their birthday on january 20. they are from bacolod, philippines, reside in tripp’s trailer park and are currently working as bartender @ wild pony. one thing you should know about them is they dress up in drag sometimes at planet 7 (for fun, not work). ‷ ( thia, she/her/they, 21, gmt )

BASICS

full name: bryce sirilan

age: 32

birth date: january 20, 1990

ethnicity: mostly filipino (hiligaynon and bicolano), some amount of white spanish heritage

sexuality: big bisexual… w/ a leaning towards women / fem ppl

relationship status: single

languages spoken: hiligaynon (native), tagalog (fluent), english (fluent), bicolano (basic bc his mom never taught him properly)

pronouns: he/they (but they don’t mind other pronouns like she unless ur being a piece of shit and using them to mock him lmao)

bryce is the oldest sibling and would’ve been the golden child. he was smart and reliable and shit. the problem for his family? bryce was sure that they were not cishet from a very young age. probably since kindergarten. they did not like that

speaking as a queer filipino, i know that filipinos tend to treat sexuality and gender as interchangeable. if you’re amab (assigned male at birth) and turn out queer in any way (though honestly i’ve seen this concept be applied to effeminate cishet men too), you’re assumed to be a gay man.

and there’s nothing wrong with being a gay man ofc. bryce embraced it tbh, it was their first label. they also fit the usual filipino of a camp gay dude.

i mean, when he decided to change his birth name he considered “carey” bc mariah carey and he’s pretty sure he subconsciously ended up using bryce bc it was a subtle nod to britney spears. (bryce siralan does sound a bit like britney spears, doesn’t it?)

but that wasn’t who bryce was. he’d learn that later.

he abandoned his immediate family to follow his supportive aunt to the usa when he was 13ish? so yeah, he grew up here in roswell.

when he was in his late teens maybe, he met ppl who taught him that sexuality and gender are separate. if you are a gay man ofc and you’re campy and everything, there’s nothing wrong w/ that! but your gender expression doesn’t inherently determine your sexuality, he learned. and there’s a whole spectrum of lgbtq+ identities

in that period of time, they thought about it and realized that they were nonbinary and bi.

anyway, they could’ve pursued a hotshot career bc they’re brainy but they don’t want that life.

they grumble about their annoying, mundane job at wild pony sure but lowkey they’re very grateful for it!!! yeah sure it’s boring and stressful but it’s part of the charm for him. just being able to live a normal life is good enough for him

they have enough money to leave tripp’s trailer park rn and fend for himself (and just himself, realistically) but doesn’t want to abandon their aunt & cousins.

yeah he likes to dress up in drag and yes his fc has gifs in drag so tune in

he’s honestly more into women but is much more insecure about pursuing them romantically. for reasons he thinks are obvious – society doesn’t rly expect a (demi-)guy who can walk perfectly in 6-inch heels to be into women at all.

they’d like to explore their attraction to women more, though. they’re attracted to men/masc-presenting ppl too though! and androgynous peeps.

on that 6-inch heels note: bryce is 6′0″, which is tall but not terrifyingly so. in heels he can be as tall as 6′6″ and seeing ppl get intimidated/startled by it makes him happy njansdjasdjn he’s a troll sometimes srry

“certified best kisser and thats why i dated him” –testimony from thee @nfldunn​ himself kdmskndjn

dating gunner in high school kinda left them with abandonment issues rip </3

anyway that’s all for now! pls do plot with us!