#right in my honey nut feelios

[whatacartouchebag]

I'm using anon because it's a side blog, but I want to give a HUGE f'ing thank you for "Suppression". It's one of my favorite fics on this site and makes me want to get back into writing (plus synchro stuff again). Signed - teal-mermaidwrites

Ohmygods I’m only just seeing this now I’m so sorry anon skhdkgfld OTL

Holy shit tho thankyou so much for such a sweet message. It’s always one thing to hear that people enjoy your writing, but it’s such a wonderful feeling altogether to know that it’s the kind of thing that inspires someone else to create because of it, even years on. I’m so glad it’s given you such a spark 💚

I really enjoyed writing that story, even if it never quite made it to completion, and it really warms my heart to hear other people adore my words too. They were always such a fun pair to write for, and I really do miss writing them some days, but they’ll always have a place in my blorbos.

Thankyou so so much, this was such a sweet and lovely surprise 💚

[wild-karrde]

For the 'anonymously tell me which character i have the same energy as' thing

ok i want to say princess leia but i haven't seen the new star wars stuff... but you have a very 'leadership' 'kind but firm encouragement' and 'willing to organize and help bring others along in the fandom' vibe and so i hope this isn't missing some big possibly insulting aspect from the new films or anything

ANON THIS IS MAKING ME CRY BUT LIKE IN A VERY GOOD WAY. Princess Leia was one of my favorites growing up. She was the princess that got shit done, the one that took no crap from anyone (even her rescuers), and had no fear in telling the fly boy to get into the garbage chute. I love her, and this made me grin so hard and I just feel really flattered. So thank you for making my whole day.

(Anonymously) tell me what character I have the same energy as

[stardust9905]

*cries for Fox* 🥺😢😭😭😭💔

Commander Fox for @501st-rexster

“You are doing invaluable work, Commander. Do keep up this level of productivity.”

“Yes, Sir.”

“Some of your… brethren have been nosy. I expect you will take care of that.”

“Yes, Sir.”

“I am pleased to see that you have come to your senses again, Commander.”

“Yes, Sir.”

“It is unfortunate how you left me no choice in defending myself.”

“Yes, Sir.”

“I expect great things from you, now that you see reason again, Commander.”

Fox felt, guts churning burning evaporating, his mouth move. “Yes, Sir.”

[therollingstonys]

🥤 ⇢ recommend an author or fanfic you love

Hi friend!! Happy to make some recs!

Right off the bat I’ll rec @iam93percentstardust for her excellent fics!! She’s a stony powerhouse and should definitely be on your to-read list! New to the fandom? You can’t call yourself a true stony fan without reading Alle’s fics!

Next is @riotwritesthings whose winteriron is Iconique™ and should absolutely be binge read ASAP!! Her fics have everything you could possibly want, and I guarantee you’ll have a blast! Now with 10% more pantry sex 🤩

@longhornletters has an incredible stony NFL (American football) au that if you aren’t reading, you aren’t LIVING!! But let’s be honest, ALL her fics are amazing and you don’t wanna be caught sleeping on her!!

@jehbeeeh is the queen of fluff and always has me grinning like a fool at my screen when I read her fics! Craving something sweet? Check out her delightful collection of fics!!

@missmoodybear could open up a bakery of sweet treats with Jeh, they’re an iconic duo you don’t want to miss out on—like chocolate and peanut butter 😍🤩 her fics are tasty goodness and always hit the spot so be sure to read up!!

@onlymorelove is absolutely always on my list because of how gorgeous her stories are and how much they make me FEEL. Do yourself a favor and get in touch with your honey nut feelios friends!!!

@stovetuna my beloved, how do I adore her fics? Let me count the ways!!! Feels! Angst! Fluff! Smokin’ hot smut!! Feast well upon her fics my friends!!!

I could rec like, a dozen more people, but for now take these goodies and enjoy!!

[nerevarswritingstuff]

hii! helloo!!!

ive been rereading tiaf for the past few weeks and i just had to tell you this,, thank you!!!

a year ago i was superr stressed moving away from an abusive household, when i realised i was absolutely not mentally ready for such a huge step, but staying was no longer an option either, so i had to pick my poison so to speak

it was around the same time i discovered tiaf and im not even joking when i say that this fic kickstarted my journey to healing, setting healthy boundaries, accepting my mental state and learning to analyze it more

im living by myself, have a well paying job and well meaning friends, a complete 180 from last year

from the bottom of my heart, again, thank you for writing tiaf, it was a greatly appreciated support and guidance in my times of need, and still is an incredible fic a year later

much love 🩷

Man what the FUCK this shit got me out of nowhere right in the honey nut feelios

GOOD FOR YOU GETTING OUT OF THAT SITUATION THO FUCK THOSE PEOPLE AND TO ANYONE ELSE IN ABUSIVE HOUSEHOLDS THERE IS ALWAYS A WAY TO GET OUT OF IT

The road to healing is never straightforward or smooth, it's got bumps, and sometimes you're driving in reverse even if it's on accident

But you'll always get there, eventually, if you strive for it and work for it!

And thank YOU for your wonderful words my brain is literally mush from a long work week and I have nothing else I can even say besides fuck you you beautiful bitch (affectionate) ALL THE LOVE RIGHT BACK AT YOU

[theunmappedstar]

popping into your ask box because i wanna unnecessarily explain what made me go HSBWJGJDJJFKSJSJDBFHFJNFJ over the please please please ending- (anyway ignore me if i’m being annoying. i figure that you’d enjoy someone talking about your fic with you but i can also understand not wanting a one pager in your askbox.)

it’s not even necessarily that they’re breaking up that made me go OW. it’s that sophie’s going i love you but you need real time you need to think over your decisions you need to change because i can’t do what our relationship is right now (ex: leaving the guy in her trunk as collateral). i’m turning you in. you can let them take you willingly or not. and Keefe LITERALLY COMMENTS on how her methods (ex: handcuffs behind the chair) are something he could get out of. and she tells him it’s about choice. and he chooses to let her handcuff him to the chair. he chooses to let her tape over his mouth (which esp hurt because this is apparently something they’ve joked about before [“i was always going to be the one to shut you up” {paraphrased}].

keefe sencen, notorious for running away, stays in place. not for the law, not really for himself, but for her. and sophie leaves him with love (ex: the kiss over the tape) and also an invitation to come find her when he’s reformed himself.

bro that HITS in the honey nut FEELIOS D”:

HONEY NUT FEELIOS IM SCREAMING

first of all PLEASE (please please) come to me with any all thoughts no matter how short or long they may be. i ADORE hearing people’s interpretations/impact of my work!! it’s so fun to hear how it was individually digested from reader to reader because some people take it a different ways.

i’m SOOO excited to hear you got exactly what i was attempting to put down!! 😭 i worked very hard to make them distinct from canon while also remaining true to their core.

yes, keefe is desensitized and locked into habit — one might even call it addiction — to the point where even love cannot pull him from it. i thought it was an intriguing concept to toy with! very fun, as well ;)

YOUR WORDS MAKE ME JUMP FOR JOY I LOVE YOU

[frodo-with-glasses]

Late to the party for Artist Commentary Ask Game, but could you one for "Bearing the Ring Bear" (the one where Faramir is carrying Frodo) with 3, 10, and 18? <3

Hi Windmill!! 😊 Great choice!

(See the original post here!)

3. What does [character’s] facial expression mean/what’s going through their head?

Frodo’s just fainted, so let’s talk about the other two. Faramir’s expression was meant to convey a sort of gentle pity and respect; he’s just now realizing what an enormous burden this little Halfling carries, and it earns his admiration and sympathy and moves him to help. Sam, meanwhile, is only concerned for his master, and trots along ready to help at a moment’s notice. For both of them, their concern is for Frodo.

10. What new technique were you trying in this drawing?

Feets ;u; As I said in the tags, I had to draw Frodo’s bare feet from an angle I’m not used to, and I’m really happy with how they turned out. His sweet little toes, gah.

18. What was your favorite response to this post?

Well, your tags are wonderful, of course X-D Everyone had some really sweet responses to this post, but I think among my favorites are @calliopechild’s tag “oh this one got me RIGHT in the honey nut feelios”, and this gem from @weezlbot:

ARTIST COMMENTARY ASK GAME!

[fandom-friday]

https://www.tumblr.com/thattoothpick/724949229260488704/they-were-never-good-with-words-the-bad-batch?source=share

This comic by @thattoothpick is so sweet and the facial expressions oh my goodness 🥺

I can't wait to see something like this in the show 😭

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOF RIGHT IN THE HONEY-NUT-FEELIOS. This one is a GUT PUNCH. They're both clearly so unsure of how to start the conversation, and the GUILT they both have for totally different reasons. This is FANTASTIC (even if it made me feel my feelings), and I'm right there with you in that I hope we see something like this in season 3! Thanks for sending this one in!

Participate in Fandom Friday to show your favorite creators from this week some love! :)

[synonymroll648]

YOU. AUGH. you've reawakened my inner keefex heart. it was burried under other such things. but u woke the beast with ur fuckin. ur keefex blogging. in tears. i need to go thru all the tags now. crying. /lh

*evil laughter* WINNING WINNING WINNING SO HARD RIGHT NOW :DD

anyway. keefex is so fucking underrated <333 i'm glad i have another someone i can scream w/ when the keefex feelios hit me in the honey nut cheerios

[brokensenseofhumor]

*FAT SIGH AS I WALTZ THROUGH THE DOOR IN A HURRY* OKAY. Okay… Brain cell 3, are we live? Yes? GREAT!

Hiii so here’s The Pimon Theory episode 7 part 2. Finally.

Brain cell 50, the fuck you mean this wasn’t in the script? We don’t have a script.

Spoilers for chapter 35. again. + shoutout to Alex Scanlations and Taochan. Also again.

Bro foreshadowed Björn and Mika’s deaths within the first few pages of the chapter. Next thing we know he’s gonna break the fourth wall by.. idk, Ch40.

Ok so. Lot to unpack here… dear god. Jesus Christ, even…

So, it’s implied that Ambrose is the one who did the Checkmate, given his dialogue, but…

PIMON IS SMILING. AUGHH… MY.. M.. MY HEARTT… AAAAA.. OUUUGHHHH. RIGHT IN THE HONEY NUT FEELIOS.!!1! /pos

So, really, we may never know who did the checkmate,

Okay so, this part implies 2 things:

It was Pimon who did the checkmate

Pimon has been keeping count of how many times Ambrose has lost a game of chess to him since they met. Either that or Ambrose is fucking dumb

Anyways-

Wait, the fuck you mean I hit the image limit AGAIN?! UUUUUUGGGHHHHHHHH!!1!111!!!

See you all on part 3 I guess.

[colesterstrudel]

I just binged Ted Lasso over the course of two days because of you (all of it lol) and I cannot tell you how INSANE of an emotional Rollercoaster it was to experience all of that in such a short time, I cried so much (especially after the newest episode omg, I was so fucking happy) I cannot believe I did that to myself and now I have to wait weekly for episodes and I cannot 😭😭

OFKSKDKDKSKLDLSKDKDLDSLDLSK TED LASSO MY BELOVED!!!!!!! This show tears me the fuck UP dude it gets me right in the honey nut feelios every single time 😭😭😭😭 and when I re-watch it, it STILL GETS ME like I know what’s coming and STILL I’M CRYINGGGGGG. I’m glad you enjoyed it so much and I cannot wait for you to suffer along with the rest of us as we wait weekly for each new episode 😂😂

[cosmoshard]

Pass the happy! 🌻🌈 When you receive this, list 5 things that make you happy and send this to 10 of the last people in your notifications!

Thank you anon the happies are very welcome🌻

Quality time with friends. Just existing together makes me happy :3

good food, especially if its from someone i love.

People’s tags on my art. My fav part of posting is seeing other peoples reactions. I once had someone reblog with “oh my honey nut feelios” and i have not forgotten it since.

Giving people incredibly specific gifts without warning. Instant gratification right there :D

People letting me know they care sbout me. In such a big world its hard to remember you make an impact on other people, so a gentle reminder every now and then is cherished like treasure✨

[wild-karrde]

#FandomFriday Blessyo4’s two panels of depicting how the Batch break the news about Omega and Tech to Lyana and Phee. The art style reminds me of The Paperman. See Tumblr link below.

https://www.tumblr.com/blessyo4/713684147552550912/more-than-words-is-all-you-have-to-do-to-make-it

Alright, sure yes I know I make the queue, but let's close the day out on some more EMOTIONAL DEVASTATION. @blessyo4 is just absolutely breaking my heart here. The individual expressions, the color choices, just THE BIGGEST OF OUCHES. RIGHT IN THE HONEY NUT FEELIOS.

This really is beautifully done, and I love the different ways in which the brothers are comforting the loved ones that will share in their grief. Just OOOOOOF ok ok gonna go eat some chocolate-covered pretzels and emotionally recover. IT'S FINE. WE'RE ALL FINE HERE.

Participate in Fandom Friday to show your favorite creators from this week some love! :)

[bilesandthesourwolf]

Illumination's The Grinch is literally one of my all time favorite movies! It hits my right in my honey nut feelios and I never get tired of it.

[frostycatblr-fandom-files]

Chance was the one who died during the Battle of Kamino, wasn't he? I remember someone out there had an OC who died during B.o.K. (and that hit me right in the Honey Nut Feelios) and I'm like... 75-95% certain it was your sunshine boy.

I was keeping up with OC lore for a good while but was too shy to interact with much back then; good chance I'm thinking of someone else, too.

Scratch all that, while I was getting a second helping of lunch I saw your reply to Kim crop up in my notifications on my phone while I left my laptop open and I got my answer lol. Point still stands about the Honey Nut Feelios. Poor Chance.

'Ey same here! I turned the whole "your brothers died at war when you were still just a rookie" thing of NTMY,B for Canvas into a more light-hearted "your brothers got sent back from summer camp early so you had to finish it without them" slightly modern-day-ish AU.

I'd like to apologize to Faro, Gunnar, Cryfar and Fluke... Canvas misses you so much.

[qhostqizmo]

Made To Fall In Love With You

Every creak of the floorboards reminded Essätha of a series of Eldritch Blasts going off as she tried sneaking her way down the hallway. The sorceress was no professional burglar; and despite picking her steps with care to where her weight would not awaken the shifted building’s quirks, each footfall was too loud in her ears. Every few steps her eyes trailed behind her, catching no sight nor sound of any waking murmuring or hobbled shuffling. So far, so good.

To her great surprise, no one manned the front desk as the sun peaked upon the horizon. The smell of bacon grease drifted from another room. It was distant; the Yuan-Ti woman assumed the keeper of the inn may be about while their help worked on preparing a meal for travelers willing to pay. Naturally her tummy grumbled and gurgled in a fit to the delicious aromas. Her cheeks warmed with embarrassment while hurrying the last few steps to the threshold.

By some grace of the Gods, the hinges of the door did not creak and it barely stuck as she pulled it open. The first rays of sunshine blasted her in the eye; a blinding array of dazzling white. Essie squinted for a moment, blinking as her sight adjusted to soak in her surroundings. The large front porch greeted its way to a gravel walkway, and down to the road littered with potholes out of town.

Her heart stammered in her chest uneasily. Licking her lips, she gazed over her shoulder once more.

Nothing.

An ill feeling of trepidation sank in her stomach, yet still she persisted on. The door sealed shut behind her with a click. It was a sign: there was no turning back now.

She took the steps off the porch in a hurry; twitchy that perhaps her sloth-like speed within the dwelling would have ripped precious seconds away from her escape. Rock and dirt crunched beneath her boots as she hurried for the street. The heaviness of her bag began to slap against her back; supplies giving a sturdy thump and rattle with each step. It fell in tune quickly with her rapid pulse. What was she doing?

What was best, she reminded the fearful voice in her head. It quieted, but did not release its grip on her conscious.

From the stoop, a figure raised its head as she paused, panting from street-level. The shape defined itself as a mastiff tilted its head; a solid swish of its tail thumping against the porch. The beast began to stand, shaking its mane of black and chocolate brown.

“Ssstay!”

Her hissed warning surprised the hound, which jerked its posture backwards and away a step down the stoop. It began to whine; deep and throaty and remorseful.

Essie licked her lips again. “Please,” she begged, insisting.

Again, the great canine whimpered, pacing the deck with uncertainty. Should it follow, or should it obey?

From within the structure, there was a rustle, and someone called out. The mastiff pricked his ears to swivel its gaze towards the door.

There wasn’t going to be a better distraction.

I’m sorry, Caesar.

Feeling a tear forming in her heart, Essätha let her feet fly. She knew how to push it; run past the point of lungs burning and the wobble in legs threatening a collapse. She’d been doing it all her life, after all. This was no different.

But it felt different.

Her throat jumped; swallowing around a great and heavy formation in her throat. All she could hear was her heavy breathing, her pulse pounding frantically in her chest, the pebbles and debris kicked up with each launch of her feet from the ground. It was a sprint against the sun; chasing shadows and disappearing between the sparse houses and closing in on wooded forest. The world was an endless blur of smells and colors around her; hues and spectrums of clean laundry hanging, flowers in bloom, tarry-pine trees freshly cut, the streaks of muted house-colors of greens and browns. A startled bird took flight before her into the sky, cawing. She didn’t look twice, but her dread thought that it may have been a raven.

She wasn’t going to survive long alone. Not like this. Not with two adversaries on her tail; one a personal vendetta, the other a vast network of cult members.

But it wasn’t her chances she was worried about.

Someone yelled at her in a startled voice from a smithery as she ran by, but her spare time had already been bought and sold. She beelined for the treeline that was rapidly approaching. At least her knowledge of untamed wilds would give her a clean escape. If she hit water, she’d even be able to throw off the dog perhaps if they decided to pursue her.

The timbers and undergrowth swiftly became a dense jungle too thick to traverse full-hurtle. Forced to pick her way around thorny bushes and clamor over fallen trees, progress began to waver. The sun rose slowly higher in the sky, little by little. Sweat covered her back from the fabric of the backpack, and her stomach growled and complained from lack of breakfast.

It couldn’t have been even an hour when her knees hit the ground, exhausted. She blinked, shivering from fatigue. A series of wet droplets hit the ground, and continued to fall from her face.

Lowering her head, Essie swallowed. Her forehead touched the dry earth; inhaling dust. An irritable bug bit at her arm. She could hear past her own heavy gasping, the sound of distant birds singing Pelor morning praise for raising the light into the sky once more.

A heaviness overtook her queasiness, and another whimper drew past her lips. She crumbled to the ground even more, falling to her side among the leaflitter, the weeds, the grass, the moss. Just the spot she belonged, among the mud and filth.

It seemed only a moment; and perhaps it was, that she closed her eyes. Breathe. Just breathe. However when she opened them again, the thicket was crashing and shaking; something large charging through and headed straight in her direction.

The sorceress reached for the hilt of one of her daggers, but didn’t grasp it yet when the barreling of fur and claws hurtled through the bushes.

“Caesar!” She exclaimed, dropping her hand as the beast scrambled just enough to stop before her. “I told you to stay-”

The mastiff whined, his butt wiggling with overzealous glee. He’d found her, and he was more than happy to lap his big, wet, sloppery tongue on her face.

“You might have told him to stay, but I told him hiruvalyë.”

A tremor raced down the Yuan-Ti’s spine. Her exhale rattled out of her like a last breath; uneasy and fearful. Goosebumps trailed and dotted down her arms with knowing as she lifted her head higher, spotting the void expression staring back at her. The man wearing the expression was dressed in a heavy garment cloak with a bear-fur mantle. She knew the texture of better than she recalled the memory of her own skin, or the feel of the kinks in her wavy hair.

“… What’s that mean?” she rasped. Her voice cracked, throat dry.

“It is Elvish; translated literally to ‘thou shalt find’.”

Essie dug her fingers into the dirt; lodging grime to the bed of her fingernails. She looked away from the nobleman’s sharp features and blankly staring eyes. Despite the fact he could no longer see her face, she self-consciously wiped at the tear tracks on her face now dusty dried-lined. Though she wanted to beg for forgiveness; to kiss the ground he walked on, she bit down upon her wobbly lower lip as he made his way to stand before her.

He took a knee, ushering the frantic and whining mastiff circling her back. Reluctantly but obediently, the massive dog sat where indicated and waited patiently.

Time slowed to a crawl. The pacing was worse than that of her break-out of the inn. Each breath came and went, with nothing happening. The quiet lingered. The guilt rose in her; mighty as the crashing of a thousand bison thundering hooves on the plains. The guilt burned into plumes of shame. The shame to self-loathing, like so many daggers stitched into invisible wounds on her skin.

When she did not move or speak after the seconds turned to minutes, finally the figure sighed ever so quietly. Essie did not flinch or shy away from the hand that reached for her face. She wished it would strike her, or push her, rather than cradle her chin as carefully as it did; guiding her to look skyward. She wished the thoughtfulness of this touch would hate her as much as she hated herself.

Instead; her eyes golden as the sunlight, stared up to find the red-rimmed void of blue and black staring hauntingly back at her.

If she thought she hated herself before, she wanted to succumb to Asmondeus’ themselves worst trails in the Nine Hells now. She deserved it. She deserved fates worse than death, for being the cause of such agony and hurt in such gentle eyes.

“… You promised you would never leave me.”

The words fell out of her faster than she could catch them: “M’lord Amon, it is safer this way, for all of us.”

More than anything, Essie wanted him to be angry. She wanted him to be furious; she wanted him to spit on her and tell her he despised her. That he had been burned and left too many times to accept this betrayal. That she was worthless. That she was a mistake.

Amon blinked; a fresh spring of tears in his eyes, and he looked at her with all the things she did not deserve. None of it she was warranted. He looked at her with reverence beyond any known language, and a gut-sense knowing wiser than the lifespan mankind could survive.

“I know you that you’re scared,” he whispered hoarsely and with understanding. “I see it in your eyes, I feel it in your body laid next to mine, I can tell by the way you breathe that you are terrified. But you never have to run from me, Essie,” Amon murmured. The rough pad of his thumb swiped away a stray tear that had fallen from her eye.

“I was so scared when I woke up, and you weren’t there-”

Her throat tightened, words barely audible as she wheezed, “Then I am a failure and a liar, and you should never have followed me.”

“I’m not upset with you.” She knew this, even as he spoke the words; reaching to hold her face in both hands now. “I’m not upset with you; I swear. I forgive you. I… I know what it’s like to push others away; to run from everything, to turn from hands that want to help you. I’m so relieved to see that you are safe. There was no note, no sign I… I didn’t want to believe or consider what could have happened… ” He swallowed; adam’s apple jumping.

“Neither of us is going to be if they find us here,” she reminded him, panic rising in her voice. Her gaze shift as though to search for the ghost of her past behind him, but his hands held her steady and true. It was out of habit to seek his eyes. She could not stay away long from them; they anchored her, completed her, soothed her like the lull of the ocean deep and true. Quietly mesmerized; fully enamored by the reflections of color off those shadowy eyes.

“I would die a thousand deaths, before I lived a day without you.”

The quivering in her lip returned, only time time it took over all of her body.

“I don’t want that, m’lord. I didn’t want to- to hurt you or to see you hurt or-”

With a conviction that he displayed only in private; only in brief moments, he moved closer to her and dropped to both of his knees. Amon’s face was alive now; emotions moving in his eyes, his browline knit, his mouth open wide and gasping for air as though he was avoiding hyperventilating. He shifted closer still; the smell of leather and firs, his eyes swallowing her into deep pools.

Essätha breathed him in, shaking, as his forehead pressed to her own.

The nobleman licked his lips. “If you have to go, know that I will go with you,” he swore, reaching for her hand. He brushed a kiss to the back of her knuckles, and heat inflamed her face.

“Amon-”

He ignored the desperation in her plea, continuing: “You can choose to flee but you can’t choose who follows you. You never left me alone in my worst moments; not when you found out my dark truths, not during trial, not when others warned you that I was nothing but smooth-talker, and I am not leaving you. We are in this together. I don’t care what dangers I have to face, as long as I am with you. If I am only allowed a second for a final breath, I would just die happy because I shared it with you.”

“You are worth the fight. You are worth whatever sacrifices I have to make, to make sure that you’re protected. Just as you have taught me, you do not have to face your demons by yourself, Essie. I’ve got you. I always have your back, no matter what happens. You don’t need to run away from me. Nothing is going to keep me away from you. We can get through anything as long as it’s you and I, remember? You told me that we could make it through anything together.”

The pressure of his hand interlocked with hers was a lifeline. There were no words to describe it; the coarseness of his palms; weathered, firm, rough. They should be almost frightening to someone like her; soft, delicate, weak. Where his struggles had lead him to his sharp edges, her own had lead her to careful hands and swift feet. There were opposite products of tragedies and misfortune.

“But I need you to live,” she wept, tears freshly falling to drip from her chin.

“Then let me live with you,” her nobleman urged, tenderly wiping tears from her face. “You helped me to meet a better version of myself I didn’t know existed. I’m stronger; kinder, more patient and merciful because of everything you’ve taught me, Ess’. I’m all of those things and more, when I’m standing by your side. You’ve taught me compassion and freedom and strength on a whole scale I never imagined. I never want to stop learning and growing with you; I never want to stop looking into those beautiful bright eyes and that warm smile, not for even a second. I can’t imagine an existence; cold and dark, after witnessing so much light that comes into the world when you’re in it.”

“I need you,” he crooned. “I need you more than air, or food, or water, or shelter. I need you; your persistence, your joy, your fearlessness, your heart, your drive and graciousness. You are everything to me. You mean everything to me. You and I Essätha; we can take on the world. We can do it, together. I look out for you, and you look out for me. You have nothing to fear; until the last fight is over we can stand side by side. I am not leaving you alone. Not… Not like this. Not until… Not until I’m sure you do not want me, that you…”

Heartbeat hammering in her chest, Essätha shushed him gently, wiping her filthy hands against her shirt. When she was certain they were clean, she reached to take hold of his face. He melted into her touch with such open want that she audibly exhaled unsteadily with shock.

“I am never going to forgive myself, if something happens to you.”

“It would not be your fault.”

“Amon-”

“Let me do this,” he insisted. “I can keep you safe. Forever, I swear.”

She hated the agony in his voice. The anguish. The desperation. He wanted her to believe; needed her to believe. And she knew his every word was true. She knew this; a fact, as the sky was blue, as the moon would rise even if there was overcast, as the grass was green and the days would continue on she knew.

It was what could happen that frightened her the most.

“You wouldn’t stop following me even if I told you not to, would you,” she mumbled. She knew the answer to this, too, even before he replied. Spoken as a statement, not a question.

“Not until I knew you were out of danger”

Another shudder racked down her spine, and she closed her eyes. When she opened them again, he was even closer; his breath now tangling with her own. Her thoughts scrambled dizzily; mind and heart buzzing with her pining.

Her nobleman licked his lips anxiously; eyes darting from her own to her lips and back again. “… What I would sacrifice to the Gods right now, just to kiss you, even once,” he whispered gruffly.

Her heart launched into the stratosphere.

Brushing her lips against his own, Essie whimpered faintly, “What did I ever do to deserve you?”

Groaning thickly, Amon pressed closer; barely restraining the temptation of her lips, but he didn’t have her consent. Not yet. He was holding back by the tiniest of margins, nesting her face in his hands.

“Essie… I love you.”

The sorceress’ breath hitched.

“Prove it to me, then, and kiss me.”

She should have known anything her nobleman committed himself to was going to be nothing less than perfect. His lips were light and soft; a stark contrast to the rugged feeling of his palms to her face. It was a kiss barely-restrained; chaste and longing but remarkably controlled. Gentle. Considerate. Giving. Something that lasted all of a few seconds, and it stole all oxygen from her lungs and left her there, eyes closed, reminiscing the moment over and over again. The pressure of his lips against hers. The tingles that it sent hurtling through her; humming in her veins like liquid fire. The taste of him on her lips as she tasted them.

Finally, she opened her gaze to meet Amon’s own, and his mouth hanging agape. He immediately looked between her eyes to her lips, and back again. His throat jumped.

“… I love you too, Amon.”

His years of patience must have snapped; the final thin hair-line fragment breaking. He did not wait for her approval for a second kiss, melding against her in a mess of sweetness and lingering want.

It was her weakness. It broke her. It was infuriating and exhilarating; she knew there would be no turning him away. She should have realized this would happen when she had been so careless and brainless to vanish on him as she had in the first place He was willing to chase her to the ends of this world, and beyond it if necessary. It made her heart swell, and it made her putty, and it felt like a blow to the chest all at once. Even after she’d left him; run away, his worst fear realized that once again he was alone, he came racing to her side anyway with a golden heart of amnesty and his endless yearning.

Essätha had been wanting this sense of completion for so long. She couldn’t believe she had wanted to deny him the very same satisfaction she so selfishly wanted of him just because it was the easier answer.

Caesar gave an exasperated ‘boof’ from his lack of attention as they fell into each other; gentle love-bites and muted gasps of ‘I love you’s between grabby hands latching on to each other. Desperate for something to hold; to cling and merge and fold into each other.

There was no separating Amon Thomas Illiad from Essätha Meduza, just as there was no breaking the cycles of the cosmos. In the end, they’d always seek out each other.

And that was more of a blanket of security than all the weapons she could ever own and all the years of isolation she’d ever have. The risk was worth it. He would always be worth it.