#rich goranski lisp

[can-a-tuna-fish]

I can and will write a multi page essay about the way people write and portray Richard Goranski’s lisp in fan content and why I don’t like it. this is sort of just one aspect of it, guys please actually consider how a lisp works before writing/playing him with one I’m begging you.

Rich has a tongue between teeth lisp (as opposed to the type of lisp that happens when air escapes from the sides of your teeth), meaning he makes the “sss” and “zzz” sounds with his tongue “out” (touching the top row of his teeth instead of resting behind them).

The way the tongue between teeth sort of lisp works, you only make the “th” sound on certain words. sun, spoil, and toss all require you to use the “sss” sound to pronounce them, meaning they would come out with a th lisp. The same goes for “zzz” sounding words like zebra, puzzle, and lazy. Plus some words with C like icing, voice, and circle, since in this context the C actually makes the same sound as an S.

Not all words that have an S or C in them make the speaker lisp though, which is where I think people get confused about it and write/play him with a silly sounding or inaccurate lisp. Words like share, show, and sheet make a “shh” or a shush sound, which usually wouldn’t have a th lisp attached to it :))

Something I recommend if you’re ever playing him or just generally any character who lisps, be conscious not to speak with your tongue out the entire time. I see a lot of the people who play him just keeping their tongue between their teeth throughout entire sentences while trying to recreate a lisp, and it changes the pronunciation of ALL their words which a lisp wouldn’t do.

Also, when writing a lisp, it’s really repetitive to read anything that constantly emphasizes it. You don’t have to write “thally thellth thea thellth by the thea thore” it’s difficult to read and makes the content less accessible overall, it’s okay to write the words normally and THEN emphasize how they’re spoken, one or two mentions of a lisp is enough to get the point across without constant repetition. Plus then it’s not crowding up your writing and taking all that effort to figure out.

Honestly all I’m saying is to think about how speech impediments work before trying to write/mimic them, genuinely though at most it mildly annoys me so there’s no anger or anything behind this post. It’s something I like talking about + I like rich so he gets to be part of this too.

[rad-rat-with-a-tophat]

have I mentioned how much I love Rich Goranski? Because I'm doing it right now.

[h0n3yk1tt3n]

richard goranski for the character ask

Favorite thing about them

Little Shit characters are fun to inflict on the other characters. Is this a Little Shit Duo that plays off of each other? (Jake/Jenna) Is this someone that has no patience for The Little Shit and sees red every time they're together? (Chloe) Do they just kinda Enable the Little Shit Behavior by not actively acknowledging or discouraging it? (Christine/Brooke) Does this character just kinda tolerate the Little Shitness until they reach a breaking point like "aight ima throw hands heY GET BACK HERE" (Michael/Jeremy)

Least favorite thing about them

The Little Shitness can get a bit one-note (which is more fanon's fault than anything else) but its like.. it's hard to Get Into The Meat Of The Character when writing for them when like, By Design the character doesn't Want you to know more about them. They'll just deny and deflect and hide everything with humor (I have the same problem with Jared, and I say *problem* to mean *challenge to write convincingly* not like,, this detracts from the character)

Favorite line

Basically the entire last verse of The Squip Song. I just think it's neat. And something about the "fuckin dads right?" when his and jer's squips link

BROTP

Rich and Jeremy. They've got their shared squip experience which sells that dynamic a lot. Plus I love the idea of them becoming frenemies, like Rich still has some Asshole Conditioning in his head from the squip but instead of being scared of him, Jeremy is just Over It. Like instead of cowering away like Pre-MTS Reprise he'll just throw a comeback or bizarre threat his way (ie "Richard I will pour cement in your ears.") because at this point Rich is just a harmless puppy to him instead of the snarling pit bull he once thought him to be.

OTP

RichJake ofc. I really do wanna do more with them but my brain is just So Full of Other Stuff

NOTP

I'm pretty selective about ships but I'm not like, vehemently against anything (You do you ya know?) so long as it's age-appropriate and, ya know, not a squip x kid ship. (Never mind the pseudo-age gap, why ship someone with their abuser?? Or their friend's abuser?? I dont wanna derail this post so im just gonna move on)

Random headcanon

Drummer Rich drummer rich drummer rich drummer rich drummer rich drummer rich, I saw it in a vision and I know it to be true

Unpopular opinion

(Im getting a little more meta with this but) I think writing in his lisp is fun. Like in comic books that's how you know a character has a Russian accent, because it's written in such a way that you Have To Read It With An Accent. I get that it can be difficult to look at (and I don't fault anyone for that) but idk I like the immersion.

Song I associate with them

I'm cheating a little because this song kind of goes with all the kids in which Popularity Destroyed Them (Rich, Chloe, Jenna, Jeremy, kiiinda jake to an extent but mostly the others) but Teen Idle by MARINA is a VIBE

Favorite picture of them

GODS where's that one Two River pic in the hospital where Rich is just staring at Michael and Jeremy from his hospital bed, like Michael's getting all excited about how all the squips were connected when they deactivated and Rich has this lost Doped Up On Painkillers look??? I may have to reblog this if I find it later. If someone else finds it first feel free to add it here <3

[badteavee]

Sit With Us

Tws / Cws : None

Genre : Fluff (?)

Word count : 1,063

Parings : Regina George and Rich Goranski / Veruca Salt and Mike Teavee , Vague Rich Goranski x Jake Dillinger

Ever since they started middle school , Veru and Mike never on the same social tier. Veru was typically treated how she always was at home , like the queen bee , she rose to popularity quick. Mike , on the other hand , wasn’t as easily accepted. Being home schooled all his life and his general not wanting to interact with anyone attitude meant that he was largely bullied or otherwise ignored.

That’s how it was up until their Sophomore year , Mike had stopped showing up at Veru’s house to bother her when their friends weren’t around a few weeks before the school year started , which she wouldn’t admit that she did anything but not care about that fact. It felt off but whatever , he still texted them at ungodly hours. He most likely got himself sick from being outside for more than a minute or something even more stupid. She wouldn’t put it past him. Unfortunately , he did show up at his usual time so they could drive them to school , but he looked a little different this year. Thankfully , he wasn’t wearing any of those ugly Underarmor shirts he owned , instead he wore a blue sleeveless shirt with an eye and his camo pants were actually normally colored this year. What a miracle. 

She gave him an unenthused stare while she grabbed their things , adjusting their outfit as she dragged him out of the house. “Why do you..” She couldn’t ask him why he looked cool , that’d be admitting that he was. “Why’s your hair pink.”

“Because I wanted it to be ?”

She slowed down their pace , turning and squinting at Mike. Where the hell is his lisp ? “.. It looks soo good.”

“Hey , the ladies will love it.”

They rolled their eyes , ‘the ladies’ haven’t loved anything he’s done since he was born. She threw her bag into the back of their car , “Get in the car.” and got in , Mike following suit. She took another glance at him before starting the car , he looked too weird like this. Not just the clothes , his posture was straighter , a green bandanna in place of the headphones he’s been wearing since they met , just weird. At least he didn’t look like a ten year old dressed him anymore.

They eventually pulled into Veru’s designated parking spot that she technically shouldn’t have yet , her stopping to adjust their makeup in the rear view mirror. Usually Mike would begrudgingly stay in the car with her and fuck around with his phone since there was no one to run off to and bother but this time he almost immediately go out , leaping over the car door to jog over to Jake. “Yo , Jakey D !” Veru almost stabbed themself in the eye with her mascara from how fast they turned their head to the boys direction. She watched , bewildered , as they dapped each other up like they’ve been friends forever. What the fuck happened over those weeks.

Whatever. Whatever , they were going to ditch him for Gretchen and Karen anyway. At least she wasn’t going to be bothered about every little thing she did. They put their makeup in her bag and got out to go meet up with her friends , now that they were finally pulling up , they tried to push how Mike was acting to the back of her head for now. This could be dealt with later.

Unfortunately , later meant Mike sitting with Jake at her lunch table. Damn. She inwardly huffed as they sat down next to Gretchen , who was way too excitedly questioning Mike and Jake. “Are you sure you’re not new ? I don’t remember you.”

“You just didn’t notice , nobody did.”

Karen butt in , “Are you a magician ?” She unfortunately sounded like she’d believe him if he said yes.

Veru cut him off before he could answer to ask her own question. “Mike , did you get rejected from your loser table ? Why are you here.”

“I hoped you wouldn’t mind , I wanted to invite my boy to eat with us.”

“I didn’t know you two were that.. close. Good for you.” She eyed the two , putting on that ‘ally !!’ Type smile.

“It’s not like that !” For whatever reason , Veru genuinely laughed at that , maybe she didn’t believe it or Mike was suddenly funny.

“Whatever you say , Michael.”

Actually , Veru found themself half stifling laughs at a lot of the things Mike said during lunch , everyone at the table seemed to agree he was funny. Mike was never this funny before. Not from what Veru remembers. But at least he was tolerable now.

At some point two geeks walked by , Veru never remembered their names , just the red hoodie and the awkward one always with the red hoodie. Mike suddenly turned , putting his leg out and tripping the awkward guy. She had to take a second to process what just happened , Mike just tripped a guy on purpose ? And he’s not getting his ass kicked ?? Either way , she couldn’t hold the snicker this time , joining her table in laughing at the poor guy , who’s already been hauled up and away by red hoodie.

The table spent the remaining time laughing the losers , watching the boys make competitions out of throwing trash and Karen occasionally asking Mike questions. Apparently , Mike now skateboarded and was best friends with Jake , who he only started talking to in those few weeks he was gone. So that’s who she was ditched for. Huh.

In the middle of their conversation , the lunch bell rang and the entire table sighed. Nobody wanted to go to their next class , almost all of them had the same math class with the worst teacher ever. They cleaned up and got their stuff together , Karen and Jake splitting off to go to their classes and leaving the rest to talk as they walked. Veru knew they didn’t have time but stopped Mike before they went into the classroom anyway , Ms. Smith can wait. “I don’t know what happened to you but you should totally sit with us. You actually qualify now.”

“You want me near y-“ Mike’s posture straightened a bit more as he cut himself off. “Yeah , cool.”

Veru took Mike’s hand , interlocking their index and pinky fingers in the handshake that they made when they were young. “You’re still weird.” They let go , both of them walking in to Mrs. Smith already yelling about lateness.

[lohstandfound]

rich goranski + 4 21 24

4. If you could put this character in any other media, be it a book, a movie, anything, what would you put them in?

I quite enjoy the idea of putting not only Rich but all the bmc characters in the situations of if we were villains.

But just Rich? Not sure

21. If you're a fic writer and have written for this character, what's your favorite thing to do when you're writing for this character? What's something you don't like?

I don't think I've written Rich very much in fics. Or he hasn't been a very prominent character in the earlier ones I've written. I like exploring him with the squip vs without the squip. I haven't done it very much- most fics I've written are either complete AUs or post canon so I haven't written a lot of squipped Rich.

I do like writing squipped Rich through the perspective of another character. They have no knowledge about the squips so when he does something and then immediately acts completely different like in the regicide au snippet, Rich agrees with Chloe which raises questions and he immediately covers it up by spinning it to 'well then that's one less person to keep you from being on top' rather than how he really feels about Jake.

This is getting all over the place lol does it make sense? I haven't noticed any trends in my writing for any of the characters.

Personally, I don't like writing out his lisp. Like, thpelling thingth like thith. I don't really think about writing it like that, I forget it's an option

24. What other character from another fandom of yours that reminds you of them?

Taylor Connery from the unwritten graphic novel series Recollections uh... John Tate in DNA, very similar ruthless leader who comes out of nowhere and uses intimidation and violence to establish dominance within the group. Yeah, I know I put him as Adam when I first started writing the fic but I was trying to fill up all the roles so adding in the squip meant changing things around.

[random-writer-23]

Happy Haunts (Rich Goranski x reader)

Warnings: just Rich being a kinky boy so.. be prepared for that... a lot of cursing... probably cringe but whatever it's fine just high schoolers being high schoolers. I'd prefer if minors didn't interact with this post however since there is no explicitly sexual content it should be fine

Requested: no I just wanted Horny boy Rich content so yeah

Sentence starter that inspired this: "oh please you love hearing me scream" "only when you're screaming my name"

Word count: 4102

I had been head over heels in love with my best friend for 3 years now. Rich Goranski. Rich and I grew up together since we've lived next door to each other for practically our entire lives. Our families became so close the two of us practically lived at each other's houses. In fact, I had spare clothes kept in Rich's closet. Daily movie nights were a frequent occurrence and a tradition we carried on to this day. We were always joined at the hip in elementary school, one of us almost never being seen without the other. But as we grew up, I became friends with the popular kids in middle school and Rich didn't. We were still best friends, of course, I just branched out and became friends with basically everyone and Rich didn't. He told me he didn't like branching out because he didn't want people to make fun of his lisp. Personally, I had always loved his lisp and thought it was adorable, but he hated it. I tried to get him to come sit with me when we got to freshman year but he pushed me away. I was a little hurt but couldn't dwell on it when Chloe and Brooke were constantly bugging me to hang out with them. So that's where I went for lunch, and with their help boys were soon practically crawling over each other trying to ask me out. I of course had no interest in any of them because my eyes were solely fixed on my lifelong best friend. But I pretended to flirt with every guy because it was nice feeling like I was wanted, and yet unattainable. It always made Chloe and Brooke so mad whenever I rejected a guy because they never knew who I actually liked since I flirted with everyone. At this point, Rich and I still hung out every day at home but he never wanted to talk to me at school. Something I never understood since he always wanted to be popular, and I essentially was popular. Our Sophomore year, however, Rich changed, over the course of the summer he became popular, I was happy for him of course but I was confused. He came over every day during summer as usual and one day his lisp just disappeared. I didn't mention it though in case it upset him in some way. It was that same day when I first noticed him hanging out with Jake Dillinger (who tried to ask me out 3 times). I had gone to the mall with Brooke and Chloe. Brooke had spotted Jake from a mile away and quickly pointed him out to Chloe (who had the biggest crush on him).  I looked as Chloe asked me who Jake was hanging out with since I knew everyone. I turned my attention to where Brooke had pointed and saw Rich walking with Jake joking and Laughing like they'd known each other their entire lives.

"Rich, Gorinski" I replied to Chloe's question, "he's my neighbor, and my best friend" I replied with a slight smile. Brooke turned to me incredulously

"I thought we were your best friends" She said putting her hand on her jutted hip.

"I can have more than two Best friends Brooke'' I replied and she laughed, Chloe shushed us and pushed me forward motioning for me to walk towards Jake and Rich. I walked up to the boys waving.

"Hey boys!" I said switching on the instinctual charm and throwing them both a flirtatious smile. I watch Rich pause for a second before smiling and flirting back.

"Looking good today (y/n)" He threw back with a wink, I smiled.

"Thanks Rich" I giggled, Brooke stood by awkwardly as Chloe so obviously flirted with Jake and he even more obviously flirted back. I looked at Brooke giving her a side eye before commenting. "Hey Jake why don't you just fuck her already" I laughed innocently.

"Yeah you're already doing it with your eyes" Brooke added, to which the whole group laughed and Jake replied.

"I'd like to take her on a date first" He winked grabbing Chloe's hand. Chloe giggled, and I jumped in again.

"She's free anytime, I just cleared her schedule" I gave Chloe a Smile, and she threw me a thank you over her shoulder. I nodded and pulled Brooke away with Rich following behind us.

"I'll bet you 20 they do it the minute their first date ends." Brooke giggled.

"And I'll bet you 20 she goes home with him today" I replied with a grin.

"Oh you're on (l/n)" Brooke shook my hand with a determined expression on her face.

"No backing out" I insisted, still shaking her hand.

"Wasn't planning on it" She giggled as my phone dinged signaling I got a text. I held my hand out to Brooke showing her the text.

MyMainHoe😘😘: you and Brooke go on ahead I'm gonna go home with Jake 😉 Me: Yesss get it queen!!! 😍😍😍 USE PROTECTION HOE!!!!!! 🤪🤪

"DAMNIT" Brooke yelled as she begrudgingly handed me a 20, and I laughed.

"Well my mom's gonna pick me up soon then" She said with a sigh.

"Awe two bad I was gonna treat you to lunch" I added holding up my brand new 20.

"Oh whatever" Brooke replied.

"You can treat me for lunch," Rich added with a sly smile.

"I'll take you out for some (f/restaurant) after Brooke leaves, K?" I gave him a smile and he nodded. For the next hour Brooke, Rich and I wandered around the mall laughing at all the jokes Rich told us. A second thing I noticed was new with Rich, he never used to be this funny. I mean sure he was funny to me but no one else ever really got his humor. After like another hour of the three of us walking through the mall, Brooke's mom picked her up.

"So (y/n)" he said wrapping an arm around my shoulder because somehow he was taller than me (if you're taller than him just pretend you're shorter) He pulled me into his side and I giggled.

"Yes gorinski? You ready to go to (f/restaurant)?" I replied looking up at him.

"Well that's not exactly what I had in mind for lunch" He mumbled into my ear with a sly grin. I looked at him and smacked his arm.

"Richard Gorinski! You kinky bastard" I whisper yelled at him to which he just pulled me closer and laughed.

"You want a ride home?" He asked looking down at me with a wide smile.

"That would be wonderful, Rich," I replied as he led me out to the mall parking lot.

-Time skip A month or so-

As time went on, Rich came to join our group, and very quickly got bolder in the way he outwardly flirted with me. He used to get so flustered whenever I tried flirting with him it made this new bold Rich kinda refreshing. But the bolder he got with his flirting the more flustered I ended up. And also with this new bold Rich came a new bully Rich that I didn't like as much. Whenever I saw Rich bullying someone, it was usually Jeremy Heere, who was actually very nice so I tried to stick up for him as much as possible. Rich also became very touchy and flirty during our movie nights, something deep down I didn't mind as much. It was one of our friday movie nights, my parents were both at work as usual and Rich and I were watching my favorite movie (f/m). I had changed out of the uncomfortable stylish clothes I had worn to school and changed into one of Rich's old shirts I had stolen a year ago, and some short pajama shorts, (and a bra obvi). I was... comfy which was the only thing that mattered. I smiled and was laying down on the one end of the couch with my blanket tucked under my arms and one of my legs thrown over it while Rich got the popcorn ready in my kitchen. I heard him mumbling to himself in the kitchen, I listened to his mumblings for another minute or so before I untangled myself from my blanket and walked into the kitchen.

"Rich you good?" I asked peeking around the corner into my kitchen.

"Oh uh yeah yeah I'm fine" He mumbled nervously twitching quickly then stopping.

"You sure" I asked, walking fully into the kitchen.

"Yeah" He said, looking at me and smiling confidently.

"Really?" I hopped up onto the kitchen counter "because the popcorn is burning" I pointed to the microwave and Rich's eyes widened.

He laughed "sorry I'll make some more" he replied rubbing the back of his neck. I covered my giggle with my hand. "Don't cover your laugh" he crossed the kitchen as he said this to lower my hand "it's cute" He winked, and turned around to make the popcorn. I waited till the popcorn was popped and then Rich handed me the bag. I shivered and he looked concerned. "You cold?" he asked, to which I nodded.

"Yeah but pass me a bowl" He got me a bowl from the cupboard, and I hopped off the counter turning to fill it with the popcorn when I felt Rich snake his hands around my waist. I stiffened up as they rested on my waist under his old shirt. "Rich..." I said hesitantly, slowly relaxing in his hold.

"Hmm?" He smiled, humming in response and resting head on my shoulder.

"Your hands are cold" I mumbled feeling the tips of my ears heating up.

"That's why I'm using you as a human heater," He laughed, fully wrapping his arms around my waist and lifting me up in the air. He carried me to the living room and flopped onto the couch still holding me. He nuzzled his head in the crook of my neck and mumbled "you look really pretty in my shirt" while tightening his hold around me. 

"Rich, the popcorn" I whined turning around in his arms to face the tv trying to get up. He sighed and let me go.

"Alright go get it" He replied tiredly sitting up to grab the tv remote while I grabbed the popcorn. I scurried to the kitchen to grab the popcorn taking a few deep breaths before going back to the living room. I put the popcorn on the coffee table. I pulled my blanket out from under Rich's body and sat on the other side of the couch. He sat up flabbergasted.

"Why are you sitting so far away" He whined.

"What do ya  mean? This is where I always sit" I looked at Rich confused.

"Yeah but it's too far" He whined again making grabby motions towards me with his hands.

"Oh fine you big baby" I laughed crawling towards him settling down in between his legs with my back against his chest, with my blanket covering both of. He smiled.

"Much better" He rested his hand under my shirt on my stomach, and the other on my thigh gently squeezing it. I smiled and relaxed against him.

--The next morning--

I don't even remember when I fell asleep but I woke up to mine and Rich's mom standing over me taking pictures of me and smiling.

"Good morning sunshine" My mom giggled.

"DID YOU SLEEP WELL" My dad said from the corner of the room angrily while my mom turned to glare at him.

"Wha?" I answered groggily, utterly confused as to why they were standing over me. I tried to get up but couldn't as I felt someone's arm tighten around my waist. I turned my head around to see who was holding me and saw Rich with his eyes scrunched up tight behind me. I smiled softly at him before turning back to our moms. Rich's mom smiled at me and touched my cheek gently rubbing it with her thumb. Before her and my mom wandered to the kitchen where my mom pulled my dad along behind them. I twisted around and straddled Rich's lap.

"Wakey wakey" I poked his face with a giggle.

"Stop" he mumbled groggily, god damn his morning voice was hot.

"C'mon my mom is making breakfast" I mumbled climbing off the couch with my face pink. Rich got up slowly and followed me to the kitchen. My mom put two plates of pancakes on the table before her and Rich's mom went to clean up our mess in the living room. My dad stayed in the kitchen with his arms crossed glaring at Rich. Rich just looked at my dad warily while he ate his pancakes while I gave my dad a pointed and threatening look.

--Time skip another month--

From that movie night on, Rich only got more touchy and flirty until the day our group went to a haunted house. Now at this point Chloe and Jake were dating, thanks to Brooke and I. But unfortunately for me Rich and I were not. I was being stubborn and waiting for him to stop flirting and gain the balls to ask me out, not even knowing if he ever planned on doing that. Brooke, Chloe and I had dressed up in one of those cute cliche group costumes except we were the Sanderson sisters from Hocus pocus... But 'sexy' as Chloe had put it. I was Sarah, and we wore the girls' dresses but we had bought altered versions that were shorter and more revealing. We looked pretty hot not gonna lie. Brooke and I carpooled to the haunted house. I don't know why I had agreed to go to the haunted house since I am a very skittish person and get scared very easily. But that's a problem for future me. Brooke and I arrived at the haunted house and Chloe and Jake were already making out. Rich stood off to the side looking down at his phone. I texted him I was here and his head shot up eyes zoning in on the car immediately. A wide smile stretched across his face and Brooke elbowed me suggestively. I laughed and got out of Brooke's mom's car. He ran up to me but stopped for a minute to admire my costume.

"Looking good" He complimented with a smile, "not leaving much to the imagination are you though" He continued with a laugh. I smacked his arm and started adjusting the corset I had worn as part of Sarah's costume trying to make my boobs look less defined. Rich swatted my hands away from my corset in protest to my adjustments. "No leave it the way it is its hot" He said his eyes lowering from my face ever so slightly.

"Oh shut up, and keep your eyes up here" I replied motioning to my face with a light laugh. Brooke hooked her arm through mine and we walked over to Chloe and Jake.

"Hey you two" Brooke said slyly and they looked at the rest of us sheepishly. Chloe smiled at our costumes.

"Ahh we look so hot!!" She laughed, moving away from Jake to stand next to us. Jake looked at us confused.

"Who are you supposed to be?" He asked

"The Sanderson Sisters" Chloe explained, giving a little twirl.

"Who?" He asked.

"Y'know I'd break up with him for that question, Clo" I said sideying Jake, who started apologizing to Chloe. We all laughed and Brooke slowly ushered us into the line for the haunted house. As we closed the door behind us we were enveloped in a thick darkness that was almost suffocating. I blindly reached out for the hand of the closest person, who happened to be Brooke. She gave me a wide smile and pulled me forward further into the haunted house with a loud laugh. A bloody butcher holding a giant rotting boar head jumped out from the darkness shoving the boar head in our faces as we turned the corner to walk into the next area of the haunted house... A giant meat locker.. I screamed and Brooke laughed at me. I pulled my hand away and ran back towards Jake, Chloe and Rich. Running into Rich's arms with a scream. He wrapped his arms around me and held me close until I stopped breathing heavily.

"You want to wait outside for the others" He asked, jerking his head to the doors. "We can leave if you want to" He smiled down at me softly, and I was really tempted to take him up on that offer. But if I did, Brooke would never let me hear the end of it.

"No I'm fine" I smiled nervously as Rich let me out of his hold, but I heard something move behind us. I squeaked and reached out to cling to his arm.

"I forgot how easily frightened you are," Rich laughed, putting the arm I was holding around my waist gently and pulling me to his side. I put my hand on his to keep it around me as we moved forward.  I heard Brooke scream from up ahead the four of us so we all hurried through the meat locker scene to get to her. Tons of fake dead animals hung from the ceiling, more than one of them twitching waiting till we walked past to move. I shut my eyes tightly trusting Rich to lead me through without bumping into anything. I heard Chloe and Jake scream from a few feet ahead of me and I risked a peek from my closed eyes. Re-shutting them when I saw a costumed person looming over the couple. I burrowed further into Rich's side as we left the meat locker scene, I opened my eyes to see where we were going next and it looked like a high school hallway with lockers lining the walls. A bathroom scene was off to the left and a bloodied crazed looking football jock stood over the corpse of a cheerleader, who had a puddle of fake blood leaking from her side. The jock ran towards us with a snarl, growling.

"Nothing to see here" He twirled his knife in his hand with a murderous smile and ushered us along.

"You'd never murder me would you Jakey" Chloe asked pulling Jake past the Bathroom quickly.

"Of course not" He smiled, giving a curt nod to the bloodied jock. We turned another corner and were met with a pitch black hallway, where Brooke was waiting for us. She trailed along, Chloe and her linking  arms happily, while Chloe reached for Jake's hand. We continued walking and at the end of the hallway a single red balloon stood illuminated.

"Awe Fuck no" I mumbled seeing the balloon. "Wherever there's a balloon a clown isn't too far behind" I squeezed my eyes shut but had to open them when I stumbled over my own feet. I looked at the ground when the loud pop of the balloon sounded throughout the hallway. I screamed loudly.

--time skip because I actually am a scaredy cat--

After a whole hour of my heart racing and beating wildly we finally came to the last 10 minutes of the haunted house. I had finally started calming down but Rich never let go of me. Which I was thankful for, we walked down another dark hallway, before Rich spoke to me.

"Y'know if I had remembered you were so skittish I wouldn't have suggested the haunted house" He mumbled with a chuckle glancing around to see if anything was going to pop out and scare me.

"Oh please you love hearing me scream"  I joked back laughing lightly, trying to look ahead and find Chloe, Jake and Brooke, but to no avail. I couldn't even hear Brooke's loud giggle screams anymore. So I froze when I felt Rich's breath on the back of my neck and both his arms wrap around my waist.

"Only when it's my name you're screaming" He whispered in my ear and I shivered turning around in his arms to face him.

"I-" I started to speak but soon stopped.

"Speechless for once are you" He laughed walking me backwards till my back was pressed against the hallway wall. I tensed up. I tried thinking of ways to tease him back, or force him to make a move, but Rich was really distracting right now.

"How would you even know what me screaming your name sounds like" I mumbled without really thinking, I was too caught up in the intense whatever it was we had going on.

"I hear it every night in my dreams. But I'd really like to hear it in real life." He murmured slowly inching his face closer to mine, his eyes darting to my lips and back to my eyes silently asking if he could kiss me. I smiled reaching up to pull his face closer and he pressed his lips against mine. We stayed like that for about a minute before separating. "God you're hot" He growled leaning down to kiss my jaw gently, his voice was music to my ears. I pulled his head away from my jaw and back to my lips by tugging on his hair gently. I kissed him softly before responding.

"I know" I smiled offhandedly, "you are too I guess" I smiled running my hands through his hair and he sighed.

"As much as I love how fuckin hot you look in that costume" He paused and I felt his fingers ghost over my curves (If you look like a cereal box like me, we're gonna pretend you're CuRvY) before he continued. "I think you'd look way better with it on my bedroom floor" He smiled, kissing me again.

"You do know how cliche that sounds right" I laughed after he had pulled away again.

"Eh, I've been waiting years to at least kiss you. I don't care how cliche I sound at this point" He smiled and was about to pull me in for another kiss when Brooke yelled.

"Found them!!!" She shrieked throwing me a devilish grin "You were totally right Jake they were making out!" She teased, I groaned trying to hide my face in Rich's chest. Brooke led us out the Haunted house, thankfully there were no more jump scares for the last 5 minutes to the exit. Chloe looked at me, saw my slightly disheveled appearance, and gave me a knowing look. Jake looked at Rich, saw his mussed up hair and raised his eyebrows with a smile. Brooke was giggling into her hand. "They were 100% making out," Brooke informed the others, who laughed.

"Well in that case, Jake can you give me and Brooke a ride to Pinkberry please? We want some ice cream" Chloe said, turning to Jake, faking a pout.

"How can I ever say no to you" Jake smiled, taking Chloe by the hand and leading her and Brooke to his car.

"Bye you two!" Brooke waved at us excitedly.

"Soo..." Rich said slyly, turning to face me and plant a quick kiss on my lips. "Wanna come over?" He asked with a wide grin.

"Uh huh" I murmured, before shaking my head. "Sorry what did you say? You kissing me is super distracting." I replied with a smile wrapping my arms around his neck and playing with the hair at the nape of his neck.

"Guess I'll have to do it more often then" He replied happily kissing me again. I laughed and moved out of his hold to walk to his car. "You were just agreeing to come home with me" He teased lightly, wrapping his arm around my waist again.

"Oh a little bit eager are you" I smiled.

"Between how hot you look in that costume right now, and how long I've been wanting to fuck you of course I'm fucking eager" He replied opening the passenger door for me.

"Oh wow, horny AND a gentleman" I laughed, trying to brush off his previous comment, as we both climbed into his car and got settled.

"Of course, I have to treat you like a lady now, cause I sure as hell won't be treating you like one later" He kissed me briefly, and laughed as his comment turned me into a blushing mess.

"God you're hot" I said quietly, looking down at my lap and playing with my fingers.

"I try to be, darling," He replied, starting the car and driving us home. 

-Fin-

QOTD: What is your favourite musical

A/N: can you tell how much I love Hocus pocus from this one shot... or do I need to spell it out for you because I  L O V E that movie man. It's great, I was told by a friend I'd totally be Sarah and I was like that's fair I do dance and sing a lot at random times and am DEFINITElY boy obsessed. On another note I really wanted to put the "are we about to kiss right now" meme in there because that's what I thought initially thought but I didn't because I didn't want to ruin the tone of this. Anyway hope you enjoyed!

[outlandish-dreamer]

Dark Regressor!Rich Goranski Headcanons

(These are also from my Ao3 account StarLite_StarBrite. They're under "My Darker Regression Headcanons" if you wanna check them out there! I just wanted to post them here because I feel like it fits better :3. This ties in with the Jeremy headcanons because I have a little story for the two of them that I'm working on. I ship these two heavily at the moment, so that's why they go together in this scenario.)

TW: for parental abuse/neglect, parent death, child abuse, and slurs (it's minor, but it's still there.)

Personally, I see him as a flip, mainly because I also hc Jeremy as a regressor & kind of put both of them together.

Being the youngest of two kids, he ate up whatever attention he got from his parents (mainly his mom) when he got the chance. 

His mom tried her best, but his brother mainly raised him until he left for college/got away from the family. She was barely an adult herself when she had both of them and since she and their dad were two kids in love, they got married at 18. 

His mother used to be an artist. She did pottery, painting, sculpting, but she mainly did still-lifes. She taught him most of the techniques she knew when he took an interest in drawing, showing him the right ways to shade and use precise motions. 

His dad wasn’t as heavy of a drinker then, but he didn’t appreciate how much time Rich spent on art. He pushed him to do more traditionally “manly” things because “he wasn’t raising some hippie fag.”

His mother grew more and more distant. Sometimes days would go by and she wouldn’t get out of bed. Things took a turn for the worst however, when she started having suicidal thoughts. She was in a loveless marriage, no one in her family talked to her anymore after she got pregnant as a teenager, and her husband started to spend less and less time at home. Usually off getting high or drunk with his friends from work. 

One day, she left. And Rich woke up with a note and a painting of the two of them on his dresser. When he got downstairs, the story of a mother of two who drove off of a cliff was all he needed to know. 

He was barely 14 when that happened. Going into freshman year, his dad started to drink more and more until he was coming into school almost every day with bruises and black eyes. 

The Squip provided a way out. An escape. And soon, he wasn’t the nerdy art-kid loser people saw him as, but an unsettling, douchey, almost-unstable bully. Or a “chill guy” as the Squip told him. 

Despite all of that though, so many nights were spent curled under his childhood blanket trying to recreate every memory of his mom until his heart hurt. 

After he leaves the hospital and makes amends with everyone, he feels so…lost. He feels lighter, his lisp is back, but his mind is elsewhere. What also weird him out about this was that he was getting closer with Jeremy. “Poor kid.” He thought. “I can’t even live with myself knowing I made him get that fucking Squip.”. He’d gotten him into this whole mess, but Jeremy surprisingly didn’t resent him for it.  “Hey, it was my decision to take it.” Jeremy shrugged before smiling. “Besides, who else am I gonna talk to about it? It’s not like the others would understand.” 

Rich smiled so wide that day. 

Those funny feelings haven’t gone away however, and he realizes through Jeremy that what he’s experiencing is just him regressing. The thing he had been punished for so many times by the robot-parasite that occupied his mind for the better half of high school. 

He honestly has no idea how to feel or what to do about it. He doesn’t know how it works, why it happens, when it happens, and so on. So, he tries to not think about it as much as he can. 

One day though, he’s sleeping over at the other boy’s house when he has a nightmare. Thoughts of his dad bursting into the room and dragging him back to the house he used to call home and his mother’s voice pleading with him “Rich? Honey, where are you? I can’t find you..where…where’d you go….” 

He’s woken up by the sound of his own cries and Jeremy kneeling down at his side. Soft whispers of “Shh, it’s okay.” and “I’ve got you” help subside his sobs. Hours pass, and the next morning he wakes up next to the slightly taller boy draping an arm around him. Not wanting to wake him up he settles into the touch and for the first time in months, he feels at peace with the war of his regression going on in his mind.

Since that day, he’s accepted that it’s a part of him and that’s okay. There’s no Squip there to condemn him, no dad to beat him out of rage and disappointment, no mom to haunt his dreams and echo in his brain (as much, but it still happens occasionally.), just Jeremy. Somehow it was the kid he used to bully stayed with him and embraced the side of him. Jeremy, someone who grew to be his best friend. Rich only hoped he didn’t break him when it was Jeremy’s moment to regress. 

[cad-av-er]

Just imagine: Our precious bean Rich Goranski giving a presentation about ethnicities post-squip

Bonus points for Jake being in the back of the classroom dying because Rich’s lisp is just so adorable

[ask-holidays-gone-wrong]

Hey rich, how're things with you and jake? After the... y'know.

((RICH winces the slightest bit.))

RICH: It's... still a bit rough. I mean- I DID burn down his house. The only place he had with everything he owned. His nessecities, his school supplies... y'know.

RICH: Even after everything, with me explaining the SQUIP... it's still a bit iffy.

[abracazabka]

Everyone: Michael and Jeremy are clearly the better ship I mean look at all our content Rich and Michael is dis cos tan the leprechaun is his former tormentor why do you ship that

Me:

[wtfgaylittlezooid]

Rich: *lisps*

Me:

[totally-bi-now]

title: “apples at play rehearsal”

word count: 1082

summary: rich is trying his best and christine is along for the ride

author’s note: this is so dumb i’m sorry? there’s absolutely no plot it’s just christine and rich being friends. 

alternative title: “christine is a tactile person and rich eats that shit up”

“How does one ask out a boy?”

Christine slowly looks up from her apple slices to find Rich staring at her earnestly. 

They’re on a, as Mr. Reyes likes to call them, ‘hot pocket break,’ and Rich had decided to sit by Christine to pester her about helping him with his lines because even though he’s still a pretty decent actor without his Squip, it’s a lot harder to memorize your lines when you actually have to memorize your lines. 

But Christine has faith in him even though he keeps pronouncing the name ‘Petruchio’ wrong. 

“Is this about a specific boy?” Christine asks because she really has no idea. Rich has talked about cute boys in the past and there was that huge crush he had on Michael during the second semester of junior year post-Squipcident (Jake’s coined term), but she hasn’t heard him talk about anyone in particular recently. 

But Christine and Rich had only just started becoming close friends the first semester of senior year and, for all she knows, Rich might still have it totally bad for Michael. 

Whoever it is, it makes Rich blush and stammer, “N-No. Nobody specific. Just like hypothetical.” 

“Okay,” Christine says, drawing out the word doubtfully. She hands him an apple slice, and Rich takes a bite out of it. “So, hypothetically, I’d just ask him out.”

Rich groans and falls down with his back on the ground. It’s really rather dramatic and even some of the other kids in rehearsal are giving him weird looks. Christine has to give him some credit when Rich doesn’t even seem to mind; he’s come a long way from the self-conscious freshman that Rich has sometimes told her about. 

“You’re the worst, Christine,” he grumbles. His half-eaten apple slice as fallen to the ground next to him, dirty and forgotten.

“Well, I mean, if you wanna tell me who this is really about….” she trails off, giving Rich an intentional raised-eyebrow-look. 

He sighs but scrambles back up, scooching close so that they’re pressed against each other. He glances around to make sure no one else is listening, and Christine has to ignore the urge to laugh at him. Eventually, he looks back at her and whispers, “You can’t tell anybody.”

“Rich,” she says, giving him another pointed look.

“I’m serious, Christine,” he mumbles, glancing back around again. “It’s embarrassing enough that Michael knows, so, like, this is big for me.”

Okay, so not Michael then. 

Christine holds up her hand, pinkie held out. “I promise.”

Rich frowns at her for only half a second before wrapping his own pinkie around hers. They shake on it, and Rich gets very quiet as he says, “It’s Jeremy.”

“Oh my god!” Christine exclaims. She’s bouncing up and down, jerking Rich’s arm where their pinkies are still connected. She drags him close and says, again, “Oh my god!”

Rich quickly shushes her, pulling his hand away. “Okay, okay! Stop! Chill!”

“But it’s just so great,” she says, but she does make sure her voice is a little quieter. “I mean, you and Jeremy! Rich!”

“I know, I know,” he says, reaching forward to grab her hands from where they’re flailing with excitement. He’s flushing a deep red now, blush traveling all the way from his cheeks and down to his throat. “But we gotta keep it a secret, remember?”

“No, I know, I know,” Christine says, nodding seriously. Then she’s grinning again. “But c’mon! You and Jeremy!”

“It’s not even a thing,” Rich says quickly. “Just, like, a crush. I don’t even know if he’d like me back. I mean, I know we’re friends and all now, but I still treated him like human garbage...like, all of the time.”

“Yeah,” Christine says softly. She readjusts Rich’s grip on her wrists so that she’s holding his hands. She squeezes them. “But you guys have talked all that out, right? I mean, we all know it wasn’t you doing all that stuff, Rich.”

“It wasn’t entirely me,” Rich corrects, just as softly. 

“Still,” she presses. “I mean, I forgave Jeremy, remember? Sure, we only dated for a month, but still. You guys are already killing it with the communication part.”

Rich bites back a grin. “We kind of are, aren’t we?”

“Totally!” Christine beams at him. 

Rich groans again, less dramatically, and leans forward until his forehead is resting on Christine’s shoulder. “He’s just so cute, Christine. Like a total fucking dork, but in a good way. Did you know that yesterday he just brought me a Mountain Dew Red to school? But only because he was having a bad day and they make him feel better, so he thought he’d bring me one too just in case. Do you know how expensive those old, gross ass sodas are?”

“Yeah, he’s really sweet,” Christine says, reaching up to play with Rich’s hair.

Before her hand is able to make it, Rich pulls back, eyes wide. “Oh god. It’s okay that I told you, right? Like I know you two dated, and like, it’s totally okay if you still have feelings for him o-or-.”

“Rich,” she interrupts softly, grinning at him. “I don’t have feelings for Jeremy anymore. At least, no more than platonic feelings.”

“Oh, okay,” he says and then smiles at her nervously. “So do you think he could, I dunno, like me back?”

In all honesty, Christine has no idea. Jeremy did only just recently come out as bi, and he and Rich do have a bit of an iffy past even though she’s pretty sure they’ve thoroughly worked it out. But also she knows how determined Jeremy was to be Rich’s friend after he got out of the hospital - almost nearly as determined as she was. And she also knows how much Jeremy genuinely enjoys spending time with Rich. 

But she also knows that Jeremy is one of the most complicated people on the face of the planet even though he constantly tries his best not to be. 

So she says, “Maybe.”

And adds a little nod for effort.

But apparently that’s enough because Rich gets a little, tiny grin on his face and says, “Cool.”

Then he’s leaning back against her and Christine forces him to wrap an arm around her shoulders so she can cuddle up next to him while she finishes up her apple slices before Mr. Reyes returns.

She’s almost fully comfortable when she realizes, “Wait, you told Michael before you told me?”

“Uh…”

[i-used-to-wear-the-fedora]

Be More Chill Spicy Bi's Headcanons

-Rich and Jeremy used to be friends back in middle school when they were both nerds and Rich was still called Dick

-after taking the SQUIP, the first thing it had Rich do was distance himself from his former loser friends and name

-it's why Rich goes out of his way to built Michael and Jeremy, other than the fact they're the two dorkiest kids in school

-it isn't until after talking to Rich in the hospital does Jeremy realize he's Dick from middle school

-Rich hates that name with a passion because of the SQUIP flinches when Jeremy accidentally calls him that

-Jeremy gets out of the hospital after two days but he still comes to visit Rich and check on how he's doing

-it's awkward at first, especially with Rich trying to figure out how to communicate without the SQUIP for the first time in years

-Jeremy actually thinks the lisp is kind of adorable

-Rich fire not care for that word being used to describe him but he lets Jeremy get away with it

-Jeremy's surprised he's the only person that's been visiting Rich on a regular basis

"But you got all this cool stuff, and acetone at school's taking about you."

"Yeah but nobody actually misses me."

"What about Jake?"

"You mean the guy who's house I burned to the ground? Yeah right, he hasn't talked to me since he got out."

"Oh..."

-Jeremy and Christine agree it's probably best that they don't date despite Jeremy's *slight* heartbreak

-Jeremy laments to Rich in the hospital because he knows Michael wouldn't want to listen to him

"Jesus Christ, Jeremy. Get over it. She's just some girl."

"Christine is not just some girl. She was THE girl...but I deserve this. After what I did, I don't deserve anyone."

"Would it make you feel better if I kissed you?"

"What?"

"What?"

-Rich's bi ass may or may not have fallen for Jeremy in the time they've been spending together and hearing him complain about Christine isn't exactly what he wants to hear

-despite the years of SQUIP Rich is still a nerd deep down and is more than willing to play Apocalypse of the Damned if offered

-Michael, who came with Jeremy on a Rich visit, immediately figured it out just from the way Rich looks at Jeremy

-as soon as Rich gets out of the hospital, Michael makes it his mission to get Jeremy and Rich together

Also: Their couple name came from Michael who told Rich not to touch Jeremy with his pee hands since he never washes his hands after using the bathroom

[arsontm]

IM SO SHOOK.

[queerwithfear]

you don’t remember me freshman year, do you? you didn’t go here freshman year- yes I did!

bonus:

[listentotheshityousay]

here’s a reminder that rich goranski has a lisp but you do not need to phonetically spell him lisping throughout his dialogue