#rh!step

[jillraggett]

Plant of the Day

Friday 3 May 2024

In this dry garden the Rhodanthemum hosmariense (Moroccan daisy) was covered in flowers early in the year. This plant creates a woody, spreading base covered with silvery leaves above which the white daisy flowers appear.

Jill Raggett

[lulue-xie]

What worst on Monday morning? a meeting or a job interview ? lol

[minitt-personal]

Had Flock Step from RH on my mind lately so presenting..... The Huebirds of Unhappiness and Indifference!

[beauzos]

I haven’t bought any RH dolls in a long time cause I ain’t got no room for more dolls at the moment but gahdamn those G2s are ugly 😭 they slashed the budget on them dolls. Ugly outfits and cheaper dolls with less articulation. I’m tired

[crystal-clear-crystalline]

[Image ID: The first image is a close up of Aidan Russell from Rainbow High's official box art. The second image is of Joon-gi Han from Yakuza 6 smiling. /. End ID]

I was trying to put my hand on who tf Aidan looked like in his artwork (since it's not himself) and I was like "omfg it's fucking Joon-gi"

[speckeltail]

idk meta about my interps of riddler and aaron and what it means for them and how they treat each other

spinning off in my own little world has yielded what I am absolutely sure to be an only slightly insane interpretation of tb!riddler; this is someone who's been dismissed, belittled, scapegoated, used countless times, whose inflated sense of ego is... yes, an inflated sense of ego, but also a cover for an insanely damaged self-esteem and general inability to connect with other people. he's defensive of his interests because they've always been mocked until they're useful, he's defensive and selfish with his skills because when he works for someone else and does as he's told he's accustomed to taking the fall. he doesn't trust when people are nice to him because he's been primed to see it as an attempt at manipulation... and he worked as an operator for a carnival game in what I see as his late teens + early twenties while he was getting his degree, so he knows full well what it's like to be manipulative. being an operator for a fun little carnival game where the fun of playing is the real prize is different from leading someone on and stealing their work, though. the biggest similarity is that the games are rigged from the start and only an idiot wouldn't see that (he didn't see that, what does that make him).

so it leaves him intensely distrusting, competitive, accustomed to relying on only himself (except for his little nerd armada, god I love the riddlemen they're perfect in every way) and letting himself be the only person to call the shots. at the same time... he is desperately reaching out for connection. he's lonely! he wants to be validated and treated like he has value for being just a person, not for his immense smarts, though he'd appreciate that too.

aaron coming into the picture doesn't necessarily change things so much as it puts a new coat of paint over it, because eddie finds himself in the same position his own father was in (and failed) but also... not at all. not in the slightest. he saw, in aaron, a kindred spirit who was used, who was abandoned, someone who wanted to get back at a system that was rigged from the start. and, I mean, it's not like Batgirl and Robin aren't on the scene. (and prank and scorn, which is its own thing.) the way I see it, eddie didn't intend for aaron to be more comfortable as sphinx. it just... happened. eddie sinks deeply into riddler as a protective layer against the world (prickly intellect and a mean streak that quite frankly dissolves the very second it's not of use?), aaron takes the thing he loved that became a horrible burden and a source of pain and turns it into the weapon he uses to get back at the world as sphinx.

to some degree, eddie is trying to protect and nurture the child in him that loved puzzles and was shot down at every turn. aaron is the opposite; he grew up fast, too fast, was on a global stage at fourteen and acting like an adult (without the adult privilege of making decisions for himself) and being treated like an adult with his area of expertise. eddie trips facefirst into love with someone who is only using him, and pays the price; aaron carefully portrays himself as someone unattainable and undesirable in his relationship with the other villain sidekicks, prank and scorn. (the context for that is sphinx went to them each separately, after their respective disasters, and went; hey. nobody's going to look out for us. people are going to try and use us. people won't take us seriously. we have to look out for each other. and they have a groupchat where aaron talks scorn down from doing dumb violent shit and donnie goes through cycles where he relapses into prank with joker. all very interesting. I should talk about it later. he's very much a mother hen because like eddie, he needs a sense of control and he cares deeply for people).

so... aaron acts like an adult, mainly. eddie helps him make a fake identity and aaron takes over from there. he's trying to be as convenient as possible, and it never comes out but he's afraid that he'll be discarded as soon as he's more trouble than he's worth-- which would distress eddie if he found out. sphinx is useful, and smart, and eager to please, and takes care of himself. sphinx is altogether more comfortable to be than aaron, who is anxious and doesn't know how to ask for help or care and feels ashamed that he wants it. eddie is his superior, not a father figure. neither of them know how to navigate this.

when aaron graduates high school, he goes to college-- this is when he stops being sphinx and starts being tyto, triggered by him investigating the disappearance of a classmate and friend and discovering a seedy underbelly to newark. it's where his and eddie's similarities come to an uncomfortable forefront. aaron, when given the opportunity, is obsessive. he's willing to wait, but only for so long. a few years ago I was pretty adamant about aaron not killing, but over the years I've honestly changed my mind... I think that he doesn't intentionally kill, but it's happened. and with the people he's targeting, he's not especially guilty about it.

anyway, eddie doesn't figure out about tyto for a while, he thinks that aaron's just retired aside from visiting gotham and doing sphinx stuff for him as a favor on long weekends and holidays, and when he does he's surprised at how much he does not like it. he did invite sphinx into the whole business with the promise of getting back at people who hurt them (and the world, in general, and the way things are rigged, and it's fine for them to break the rules because nothing is fair) but that was stealing money. blackmailing people, at most! silly bullshit like jello bombs. people in speeding cars they control so they're not really in any danger. distractions. you know. supervillainy? tyto is not a supervillain. tyto is not even necessarily a vigilante, though that's what he's treated as. tyto is indeed getting back at people with precise and violent intent, much as an unsupervised nineteen year old with extensive training and too much compassion for his own good might.

it's not going to end well! it's a hopeless crusade that leaves power vacuums and is endless work, and what's going to happen when aaron graduates? How the hell can Eddie respond to that? he can't tell aaron to stop because he's not in charge of him anymore. he doesn't disagree with what aaron is doing but it might get him killed, and in fact there is a high chance that it might get him killed.

anyway I think that's what makes eddie realize that he cares for aaron a lot more deeply than he ever expected he does, or should. and once again things are spiraling out of his control and the only thing he can do is watch and hope there's enough pieces left to pick up.

[makoandharu]

So, I never watched the two last movies. How true its that rinharu becames canon and haru leaves makoto behind??

I really hope its just internet lying to me :/

Lol PLEASE the Internet is lying to you but that doesn't mean that movies weren't a hot pile of garbage

[humangirlshelley]

Unfollowing a lot of blogs in an effort to keep my phone time down, I want to have a limited number of posts to read at any given time

[qwimblenorrisstan]

Dreamers | Rhysand & Daughter!Reader

Summary: After Madja is away in business for two months, he has to find a healer to replace her in her absence, which happens to be you, his bastard daughter, and unbeknownst to him, Azriel’s mate.

Word Count: ~ 2.3k

Warnings: Angst, bad family relationship, mentions of prostitution, implied sex, but it ends happy don’t worry (PLATONIC BETWEEN RHYS AND READER)

A/N: This request was like perfectly matching up with my daydreams so thanks !! hope you enjoy<3

Requests are open!

Throughout all your years of education and schooling, there was one truth you knew without having to be told.

You were unwanted. A mistake.

You’d always known that and hadn’t cared much for the first few years of your life. Your mother had been a prostitute, and your father had accidentally knocked her up. Whether it had been a mistake, or your mother had purposefully not used a contraceptive just to have a tie to the High Lord was still in debate, but you didn’t care much anymore.

He had tried to raise you, probably not wanting you to grow up a whore like your mother, but been trapped Under the Mountain, leaving you alone, your only real ties to him were through Cassian, who didn’t seem to care that you were a bastard child or your circumstances.

He felt like more of a father, sometimes.

You’d gotten your apartment in Velaris, working as an herbalist, and something of a medic, using the mingled magic of your mother and father to heal people. Some would say the job didn’t match your sometimes uncaring and blunt, even bitter demeanor. But you didn’t care what they said, and you never had. It paid the bills, and let you live relatively comfortably in your little shop when not in the apartment.

You had heard the rumors of Feyre, the Cursebreaker who’d freed your father, and by extension all the other High Lords from Under the Mountain. You’d seen the female and your father together, walking the streets happy as could be together, openly proclaiming their love, not to mention their baby.

After he’d been liberated, you hadn’t tried to seek him out, and he hadn’t with you. It was for the best, probably. You wanted nothing to do with his perfect little happy family and Inner Circle, you didn’t belong there, and you had no desire to. You hadn’t needed a father to grow up, and you didn’t need one now.

However, Madja was away on business, leaving you as the only other healer in Velaris capable of giving checkups to their child. It was for that reason, you suspected, that he invited you to a “family” dinner as if he’d ever treated you like family.

“It’ll be alright.”

Your mate, Azriel, spoke to you as he got ready to escort you into the House of Wind, where they wanted to have dinner that night. You hadn’t bothered to dress up nice or fancy, only donning some loose pants and a shirt, clothes you would usually work in.

Azriel had been your mate for nearly three years, having secretly accepted the bond, and decided to keep the relationship private for now, to let things settle down for now, and now had stretched into one year after another, until you were both content to live in the shadows.

“You know how I feel about them.”

You replied, sighing before quickly composing yourself at the clear mix of emotions on his face. His urge to defend his family and to empathize with you warring with each other in his mind.

You stepped forward, settling into his arms as you felt the shadows wrap around you, the environment shifting as your eyes remained open, and then you were there, the door to the House of Wind standing right in front of you. It felt wrong, to come back here after completely cutting off contact, only to be used for your healing abilities and medical knowledge for a half-sibling you’d never met.

Glancing over at Azriel, he gave a little nod, and you opened the door, setting foot inside the home and immediately confronted with the scents of multiple people. You could recognize some, Mor, Rhys, Cassian, maybe Amren? Only Feyre, Rhys, and Cassian were seated at the table, waiting for you. You’d heard news that Mor was visiting her private estate, and Amren off god knows where.

Expression as ticked off and blunt as you were feeling, you walked in, taking a seat as a plate of food magically appeared in front of you.

Rhys’ gaze ran up and down you, noting your clothes, simple cheap ones to get the job done, the herbs caked under your long nails, the calluses on your hands from handling your mortar and pestle so often, the way you didn’t smile at him or any of his family, or the same impassive and slightly annoyed look on your face. Something briefly appeared in his gaze, before being gone just as easily. Good. You had enough to deal with without any family problems.

“Hello, Y/N, I’d like you to meet -“

He spoke, voice sounding as confident as usual, but with a hint of a crack, as if testing the waters as he gestured towards Feyre.

“Your mate and son. I’m well aware.”

Your voice wasn’t like his, not with the silver tongue he had, tone blunt and straightforward. You didn’t refer to them by name on purpose, to make it seem like you hadn’t even cared to follow the news about him and his life. Like you were better. Feyre cast a sympathetic glance at Rhys, one that made your temper flare.

He shouldn’t get to be comforted for his past mistakes coming to bite him in the ass.

Cassian remained silent, exchanging glances with Azriel across the table. This was bound to happen eventually, and the General didn’t try any of his usual tactics to lighten the mood.

Rhys swallowed, opening his mouth to speak, probably to try and soothe you or make you less openly hostile, but you interrupted him.

“What do you want?”

You asked, tone blunt and cold, detached almost if it weren’t for the anger you held against him. He tried to hide his wince but failed to do it completely. That made you feel a bit better, at least. A sense of satisfaction and accomplishment. His expression sobered into one of resigned seriousness.

“Our healer, Madja, will be away on business for two months. You’re the most qualified to take her place if you would.”

He said. Feyre seemed a bit uncomfortable with the thought of you being the personal healer for their family for two months, and you didn’t blame her, considering your demeanor and history, but it still pissed you off.

“How much will you pay?”

You asked blandly, making it clear that the job meant nothing to you to get closer to them at all. All that mattered was the pay. Your mind was already calculating the costs, advantages, and disadvantages of taking the deal. He stiffened slightly, another small victory.

He stated a price, it was high, ridiculously so, in fact, but you weren’t complaining. Money was money. Even if you got it from your half-family.

“Sure.”

You said simply, still not touching your dinner. The food was tantalizing, but the thought of sending a message even more so. You wouldn’t dine at this table, not like how you had done so many years ago. Though your throat was parched, you didn’t touch the glass of water.

“Is that all?”

You asked, your mint green eyes, the same shade as your mother’s, meeting his violet gaze. Pure indifference was all you were determined to give him. After he’d forgotten about you, too obsessed with his mate and new child, the replacements, to bother with you.

“I was hoping you’d stay for dinner.”

He said quietly, a hint of pleading in his gaze. You felt a pang in your chest at that but shoved it down as you got up from your seat, not tucking it in. They could look at the seat pushed out after you left, and think about you. It would hopefully plague his mind like he plagued yours.

“Keep hoping. See where it gets you.”

You said dryly, walking out of the kitchen, out of that goddamned sentient House that remembered you even now, how it knew your favorite food, just the way you knew your mother had cooked it so long ago, or the way you’d loved the water from that river out back, one you still visited now.

You heard the harsh scratching of a chair against the wooden floor and footsteps, and before you could winnow away, you found that you couldn’t move.

Not metaphorically or rhetorically, you literally could not move your own body, and that’s when you became all too aware of the presence in your mind when your barriers had slipped because of your irritation. Your father finally released you as he stood behind you, you whirled to look at him, seething.

“Stay out of my head.”

You hissed, shoving him away from you even as he gave you a begging gaze.

“Please, I’m sorry, let me try, just give me one chance to be your father, one?”

He begged, voice cracking with desperation you’d never seen before, and it would’ve weirded you out a little if you weren’t frozen in place, throat even dryer now as you tried to think of something to say.

Despite how you denied it and wanted to be cold and vengeful towards him, deep down, that wasn’t what you wanted. Maybe a relationship with him wouldn’t be so bad. It wasn’t like he’d had a choice to leave you behind, he’d been kidnapped Under the Mountain, and been so busy putting his Court back together and handling a war that he hadn’t even been able to think about you.

You swallowed, sighing and giving a resigned nod.

“Just..meet me for breakfast tomorrow, I guess. At my apartment. It’s down the block to the right of Rita’s, you’ll know it when you see it.”

As soon as you said it, he pulled you into a gentle hug, feeling you stiffening under his touch. You weren’t the most touchy person with strangers, or people you didn’t know very well at that.

Breakfast tomorrow. Great.

*********************************************************

Az had already been late when he’d arrived at your apartment for the moment, his tedious little schedule for the recent mission already thrown off because of the extra time he’d taken bending you over a counter. Just as he gave you a little kiss on the cheek, opening the door to head out, he ran face-first into Rhys, the only thing stopping the two from kissing being the subtle height advantage Azriel had over his High Lord.

“What -“

Rhys began, and Azriel was gone quicker than you’d ever seen his shadows transport him. You dragged your father in, closing the door behind you.

“He’s my mate and has been for three years, but anyways, breakfast.”

You blurted in a rushed tone as you tried to ignore the obvious thing that had just happened. Rhys ran a hand through his dark hair and sighed, seeming exasperated but not surprised.

“I thought so, Cassian said he’s been coming home smelling like you lately.”

He muttered under his breath as you slipped an oven mitt on, pulling a muffin sheet out of the oven and hissing as the oven brushed against your arm, leaving an angry little red spot. Your father’s eyebrows raised at that, and he walked over and turned your sink to a lukewarm temperature, grabbing you and easily moving you over to it to run the burn under it. Protective instincts were probably already kicking in for him, albeit a bit dusty and not used for anyone other than his new son.

He grabbed a roll of bandaging that was on your counter, from the other night when you’d also accidentally burned yourself while trying to open the oven with your bare feet, hands too busy. The oven-related incidents were getting a bit too often, now. Especially since Azriel threatened to throw the oven out if you didn’t stop getting hurt.

“Thanks.”

You managed to mumble as his slender fingers skillfully wrapped some of it around you, securing it easily. He gave a little nod, slipping an oven mitt on and dumping the muffins out, just shoving them all onto one plate he set on the small table with two chairs, one for you and Az.

He sat down, you sitting across from him, grabbing a muffin and unwrapping it, before just awkwardly eating in silence.

“So..”

You said, swallowing as you tried to think about how weird this conversation would be. He sighed, running his hands through his hair again. It seemed to be a nervous habit of his.

“I’m sorry, for not being there. There was just so much going on, with the war, Amarantha, not to mention Koschei…”

His voice trailed off at the mention of them.

“I..get it. You were busy with all that.”

“I still should’ve been there. You’re my daughter, and you grew up without a father because of me.”

You swallowed, trying to bite back the emotions that rose because of this conversation. He seemed to notice, violet eyes softening as his chair scooted a bit closer to yours, wanting to comfort you but unsure how to do so without further upsetting you. You suddenly felt bad for all your remarks and attitude earlier. He’d been trying, you hadn’t.

“We can start over if you want. Just father and daughter?”

You nodded, sniffling slightly. At that tiny sniffle, he couldn’t resist anymore, getting up and pulling you into his arms. This time, you didn’t stiffen, didn’t struggle, or try to pull away, you just cried into his chest in a way you usually only could do with Az. He held you close, hand soothingly rubbing your back.

“I think I’d like that.”

You managed to choke out as the tears dried up, and you looked up into his violet eyes, now noticing the golden flecks in them, like stars you could wish on.

Stars promising hope and a future of warmth and acceptance.

Tags:

@judeduartewannbe

[jacobitajoe]

more… MORE

science diagrams that look like shitposts but Rhythm Heaven

[im-totally-not-an-alien-2]

Danny didn't know what to do with all these flowers. Sure, Amity had done a 180 after they stopped listening to his parents (its just a shame what had happened to them) and they now loved thier guardian and savior.

Which brought him back to the flowers. It was the day after Valentines and he had gotten gifts from what felt like everyone in the city (except Vlad who was in ghost jail via the Observants) leading him to having a massive pile of flowers, stuffed animals and candy to figure out what to do with.

Obviously most of the stuffing were going to be decorating his lair in the GZ but the flowers would rot eventually and he didn't even own a single vase anyway. He was not going to mention the chocolate.

Then Tucker gave him an idea. He can just give them away to other heros.

Cackling he set about plans to ambush the batfam who he had met once or twice when he was exploring through dimensions (and promptly chased out of the city)

He started with Red Robin the smartest and arguably the cutest of the brood. He had picked a good time too because birdy looked five steps away from falling asleep on the rooftop while running, so when Danny through a bouquet or roses at him the soft petals clocked him right in the face.

The look he gave was one of pure confusion as he stared at the plants. Then, all too soon it clicked and the vigilantes face turned a lovely shade of red as he looked around for whoever tossed them. Luckily Danny stayed off the visible spectrum that night.

The next victim was Spoiler who he clocked in the back of the head while she was distracted by talking to a civilian. The yelp she made was glorious and almost made Danny cackle and give away his position.

Red Hood Danny had to be the hardest one. Sneaking up on him was almost impossible. He could sense RH like he could a ghost but something was definitely off. He wondered if Hood could sense him too. Is that how he always seemed to know he was around. It didn't matter in the end because Danny had a lot of free time without the ghost attacks and a near endless supply of ammo. Still. Danny was getting irritated and just decided to chuck flowers at the guy until he landed a hit. He didn't know why hood was freaking out so much over flowers or why he was shooting at the flowers or even what "Pit" he was screaming about but the moment he got a hit in Danny decided to bounce.

Robin was funny. He threw a bouquet and the little bird caught it like a sword before inspecting it with a raised eyebrow.

Orphan was nice. She caught her bouquet gracefully in her arms almost as if she was expecting it and held it to her chest before looking right at him and waving.

While he was invisible.

He bolted.

Occasionally he liked to interfere with the bats rogue battles by throwing a single rose into the frey, startling the baddie of the hour and giving the bat or bats time to collect themselves. Yeah thats right. He Tuxedo Mask'd them. Something that infuriated some of the bats and got other giggling.

He at least knew better not to do this to Poison Ivy. For her he portaled in something special. The look on her face when one of those battery powered toddler jeeps came racing down the street with a full rose bush in a glass bubble and into the fight was something he'd cherish forever. Especially when she realized she couldn't control the thing thanks to the glass.

This leads to the last bird.

Nightwing was probably one of the best victims hes had. He took it like a champ and even played along, giving a little speech about being honored to receive such a gift, prompting Danny to throw individual flowers at the heros feet. Nightwing continued talking and Phantom kept giving him flowers, distracted by what the hero was saying and slowly drifting closer until-

The kick to the side of the head didn't really hurt, when you get used to being thrown through buildings not much could really hurt you anymore but it was enough to stun him and force him to drop his invisibility. Another kick and a few shocks from a pair of acrizma sticks for struggling and he was on his belly at Nightwings feet. He felt something fasten around his wrist and his core felt restricted but he didn't transform back into Fenton.

Crap. Power dampening cuffs.

He was so screwed.

Danny was later upset to discover there was a whole other bat he didn't know about or even get to target once due to him being on the daylight shift.

[stealingyourbones]

DPxDC Prompt Masterlist #1001-1050

1001. Ghosts Are Beyond Time 1002. Dash Runs Tests on Star Labs 1003. Jazz is Clark's Intern 1004. Supes Prime Punched Hole into DP 1005. Amity has Lead Poisoning 1006. Jason Avoids Ghost Fighting Sickfic 1007. Danny the Ectonaut 1008. Junior College Student Danny 1009. MotherBoxy 1010. Corpse AU 1011. GK calls JLDark Hotline 1012. GK RH Goon 1013. Damian Avoids Ghost Fighting Sickfic 1014. Ghost Wail Perfect Mimicry 1015. Ghosts are Radioactive 1016. John Jones meets Plasmius 1017. Dash works for Ferris Air 1018. Val works for Ferris Air 1019. Zatarra vs Box Ghost 1020. Clayface steps in Ectoplasm 1021. Constantine is Fentons' Ex 1022. Dash Central Cougars 1023. Ice Core 1024. Will o' Wisp! Ghost Core 1025. Casual Ghost Contract 1026. Soul Trading Card 1027. Flatland!Ghost Core 1028. Ghostly Bread 1029. Dani is a Talon 1030. MY CABBAGES! 1031. Nightengale Triplets 1032. Gun Store Owner Jazz 1033. Uncanny!Amity Parkers 1034. Unique Metagene Danny 1035. Mosquito!Ghost Blobs 1036. Danny goes to Meta Resource Centre 1037. Tim stuck in GZ 1038. Accidental Proposal AU 1039. Gordon is a Fenton 1040. Riddler vs. Ghost Writer 1041. Ghost!Batman 1042. Fae Rules 1043. Deep Sea Ghost!Danny 1044. Proto Core!Batman 1045. 99 Red Balloons but Blob Ghosts 1046. Formaldehyde Rat!Jason 1047. Tax Worker Danny 1048. Effervesence. 1049. Cartoon!Ghosts 1050. Not!GK AU

[invisible-lint]

Something Wrong

AzrielxReader

Summary: Azriel is late coming home and you worry

Warnings: MC death, major angst

Word Count: 1.3k

You pace in front of the fireplace, the warmth coming from it doing nothing to warm the chill in your bones. Something was wrong with Azriel, you were certain. He was supposed to be back  hours ago. Typically when either of you went on a mission, you would put walls up, silencing the mating bond, to keep from being distracted, but if either of you were delayed for any reason, you took down those walls just long enough to let the other know. But he hadn’t. When you had gone to Rhys worried, your mate hadn’t responded to the violet eyed male either. 

You were supposed to go with him, but right before the two of you were set to leave, you had gotten news that changed everything. You’re pregnant. You almost hadn’t told him, knowing that he’d make you stay behind, but had decided being left behind was better than what might happen if he noticed your changing scent while the two of you were away. 

So here you were, pacing in front of the fireplace in Rhys’ office, waiting for him to let you go track down your mate.

Rhys says your name, getting your attention. “I’m sure he’s fine. He’ll be back soon and tell us why he was late and why he didn’t answer. And then we can kick his ass for making us worry.”

You shake your head, you may not be able to feel your bond right now, but you can feel it in your soul. “Let me go after him.”

“Absolutely not. Azriel told me why you stayed behind. I am not sending his pregnant mate, my pregnant friend out into a potentially dangerous situation. If I did, he’d kick my ass and have every right to do so.” You stop your pacing and cross your arms, glaring at the High Lord. How is he so calm right now?

“Send me after him.”

“No.”

“Who are you more afraid of, Azriel or me?”

“Azriel, no question. You’re a very close second right now though if it makes you feel any better.” It doesn’t. You’re about to argue more when a bout of nausea sends you racing for the wastebasket next to the desk. Why it’s called morning sickness when it plagues you at all hours of the day, you’re not sure. 

“Sorry about the waste basket.” Rhys just shrugs and waves his hand, cleaning it. Thank the Mother for magic.

“Don’t worry about it. If he’s not back in an hour I’ll have Cassian go look for him, okay?”

You nod, giving up on arguing with him.

Feyre comes in with a glass of water and a cup of ginger tea. You stand slowly, and move to the couch near the window before taking the glass from her, sipping it slowly. She sits next to you, taking your free hand in hers. She squeezes your hand, trading the water for the tea once you’ve finished it. You sip the tea, appreciating the way it soothes your stomach. 

“It helped when I was pregnant with Nyx. I can have some sent to your house if you’d like?”

“I’d like that, thank you.” 

“Of course.” You sit like that with Feyre, sipping your tea for the next hour. Azriel doesn’t show up.

“Rhys somethings wrong. I know something is wrong.” He looks at you, starting to believe that you may be right.

“I’ll tell Cassian to go search.” You feel Feyre wipe tears away from your eyes. When did you start crying? 

“We put up walls when we’re on missions. Would… If he was… I’d know if he was…”

Feyre rubs your back, trying to comfort you, keep you from breaking down completely. “You’d know. That you would know. He’s still alive.” You nod, letting out a breath. 

“Cassian is heading there now. He’ll find him, don’t worry.”

And so you wait. Feyre continues to rub your back, and you lean against her, taking comfort in your friend. After a while, you find yourself rubbing the spot where your and Azriel’s child is growing. You chew your lip. When Cassian gets back with him, you’ll have to have a talk with him about stepping back, at least for a little while. You need him. And you want to make sure that your child gets to meet their father. 

You must have dozed off, waking suddenly when Rhys and Feyre both stand. You look between the two of them, knowing they’re communicating mind to mind. 

“What is it? Did Cassian find him?”

Rhys’ voice is calm and even. Too even. “Yes. I’m going to go get the two of them and Feyre is going to go get Madja.” It’s bad. It has to be bad if Azriel couldn’t even winnow himself home. If Rhys has to go and get them. In your growing state of panic, you don’t even notice them leaving. You stand, pacing by the fire again. What had happened?

 It’s the smell of the blood you notice first, running towards the source of the smell. When you take in the sight of your mate, you start crying again. You make your way to his side, taking his hand in yours. “Oh, Az… What happened?” 

He tries to reach up to wipe the tears away from your face, but doing so must aggravate his injuries, because he winces, letting his arm fall back down by his side. “You should see the other male.” You shift, pressing your forehead to his. You don’t like the raspy sound of his breathing. The way his shadows seem to be lying dormant, pooling with the blood underneath him. 

“Just hold on a little bit longer, Azzie. Feyre went to get Madja.”

“Promise me something?”

“Anything.”

“If I die-”

“No. I take it back. You are not dying. You can’t die. I won’t allow it.”

“I don’t think you have much of a choice in the matter, Love.”

You sit up, looking him in the eyes, ignoring how pale he is, how close to dying he is. Where is Feyre with Madja? 

“I don’t care. I need you. I can’t do this alone.” 

“Yes you can. You’re the strongest person I know. I love you. So much.”

“I love you too Azzie. You’re going to be okay.” He just smiles at you sadly. He’s not sure if it’s hope or sheer stubbornness or if you’re just refusing to see the reality of the situation in front of you. He wishes he wasn’t going to die. Wishes there wasn’t so much to live for. Wishes he would get to hold the child you’re growing. He takes a shallow breath, eyes getting heavy.

“No no no no, c’mon Azriel! You’ve gotta keep your eyes open! Keep your eyes open for me, Azzie baby.” He wishes he could listen to you.

Feyre was right. You would have known if he had been dead earlier. You feel it when he dies. Feel it as the mating bond disappears. It’s different from when you would block eachother out. Then, you could still feel it there, a warm presence in your chest, a golden thread connecting you. Now, your chest feels empty, hollow. The golden thread is gone. You cling to him, screaming.

Madja and Feyre appear then, too late. Not that anything could have been done if they had arrived earlier. You pull him into your arms, holding him to your chest as you scream and sob. Your friends watch on, their own eyes filled with tears. Eventually, your throat becomes too raw to scream, so you just hold him, sobbing, ignoring how his blood soaks your clothes. Then, you run out of tears, so you just hold him, not wanting to let go. 

Feyre tries first to get you to let go of Azriel, but you ignore her. Cassian tries next with no success. When Rhys tries, you don’t let go, but you do look up, your eyes meeting his violet ones. 

“I told you something was wrong.”

A/N: I'm a little bit sorry for this one and I don't even have Hozier to blame this time. Feel free to either send in requests!

[dollsahoy]

Got a secondhand Rainbow High body, missing one hand. I found that these Disney Star Darlings hands fit just about perfectly, then modified this LaLaLoopsy Girls head to fit the large RH neck.

Then I had to figure out what to do about the fact that the head was missing its plastic lace hair

Step One: insert heavy bamboo skewers into the places where the original plastic lace hair was attached. Secure with hot glue.

Step Two: wrap the bamboo skewers with acrylic yarn. Secure with hot glue.

Step Three: cover the acrylic yarn with finer-textured yarn. Secure with hot glue. (also: take a moment to paint over the blue button eyes)

Step Four: paint the yarn with a white base coat. No need for hot glue here.

Step Five: Paint all the 'hair' with the same pink acrylic.

Step Six: topcoat with pearl medium

Step Seven: Get the hot glue back out and attach all the flowers

Yeah, that seems to have worked

[justauthoring]

and i wonder... who? [7]

somehow, you find yourself torn between the two hottest guys at your school and you have no idea who to choose. loosely based off of operation: true love where geto is eunhyeuk and gojo is dohwa :)

a/n: this isn't my favourite chapter but i wanted to get it out before i lost the motivation to finish it

pairing: geto suguru x f!reader, gojo satoru x f!reader, satosugu x f!reader

tag list: @username23356-blog - @anxious-chick - @novacaneformybrain - @mandysfanfics - @rottmntrulesall - @voiceofnoreturn - @rh-tg1 - @ky0mybeloved - @black-swan-blog27 - @ladytamayolover - @the8ate - @maybe-a-bi-with - @dudalo100 - @reese-is-right - @6lonely-town6 - @its-a-damn-blue-brick - @kimi01985 - @dorusken - @siimp4youu - @catobsessedlady - @paper--angel - @animechick555 - @meshiinuma - @xxannyxx - @kaeyaviado - @kochochan-shinobulvrrs - @ichikanu - @valeriinee - @yourfavepookiebear let me know if you'd like to added! also i still don't know how to fix the tags - it works in editing but doesn't link some when i post it. if anyone knows how to fix this, please let me know!

Geto and Gojo don’t stay for long.

It’s an unexpected, odd but comfortable air that falls around the three of you and despite the events of the night and Sukuna’s actions, you find yourself crawling into bed with a huge smile. Your mother, when she comes home, is confused on why you’re so happy but you’re careful to keep the reason why limited.

You’re not exactly sure she’d be all that impressed with you inviting two boys over, alone, when it was dark. And you don’t even want to know what would happen if she had found out and told your father.

So, you just tell her it’s because you had a fun night out with Shoko at the amusement park before excusing yourself to bed. Which, speaking of Shoko, you figure you should probably tell her the truth—the last thing you wanted to do was leave her excluded and she was your best friend, so you feel she deserved to know the truth. 

Of course, she’s upset you didn’t tell her right away and she also professes that she’s “going to kill Sukuna”, but after you talk her down from that, she’s very understanding. The two of you ended up talking for way too long and you go to bed way too late, but nonetheless, the rest of the weekend is spent catching up on homework and relaxing.

Monday morning sneaks up way too fast, like it always does, but oddly you aren’t nervous. Actually, you wake up earlier than you normally do and get ready with a pep in your step, humming softly to yourself as you do. You eat breakfast with your mother who makes a comment on your happiness, to which you simply shrug and she gives you a weird look and then you meet up with Shoko, as you normally do, and walk to school together.

Morning classes go by smoothly. 

Geto winks at you when he catches your eye when you come into class, to which Shoko raises a brow at you and you simply shrug. You send him a wave in return, trying to fight the blush that threatens to grow on your cheeks, before taking a seat. Sukuna’s there, a black eye and a bandage on his cheek, but you promptly avoid his gaze and it seems like he does much of the same. 

Halfway through the lesson, Gojo texts you and when you don’t answer him right away, he sends you three more until you finally do reply and then promptly get caught with your phone by the teacher who promptly confiscates it.

You make the mental note to curse Gojo out.

But despite all that, everything’s good.

Lunch rolls around and Shoko says she’ll meet you at the cafe after you’re done getting reprimanded by the teacher with a laugh, to which you smile sarcastically at her but nonetheless agree.

And even though your teacher is harsh, like he always is, he gives you back your phone and you hurry to leave the class, feeling your belly growl at you in hunger.

You’re in the midst of sending Gojo one particularly long-winded text about bothering you during class when your name is called.

Blinking, you glance up, mid-text, only to instantly frown when you see Mei Mei.

Instantly, your mood drops – this was not good.

-

You’ve never gotten along with Mei Mei.

You still remember the first day you met her. It was fifth grade and you’d just moved. You’d been nervous all weekend about starting a new school and it was even worse because your parents had had you move in the middle of the school year, so while everyone else had had time to get to know each other and bond, you were coming in as the random ‘new’ girl.

Your mother had helped you with your hair, a brand-new backpack and school uniform had been bought for you over the weekend, and then she drove you to school instead of leaving you to walk or take the bus. You’d been a bundle of nerves all morning, feeling sick to your stomach, and when you’d finally arrived and your teacher had introduced you to the front of the class, you could’ve sworn you’d thrown up if you even faltered for a moment.

But you got through it, and you were placed at a desk, and that was that.

Then, lunch rolled around.

All the kids had jumped to their feet and raced outside, and you’d trailed slowly behind, not sure who to approach or if you even should.

You didn't have to, though. Because a minute after standing there aimlessly, a girl just slightly taller than you with the brightest white-hair you’d ever seen walked right up to you. Behind her had stood two girls you don’t remember, but nonetheless, she’d smiled at you and asked if you wanted to hang out with her and her friends.

Thinking that you’d lucked out and found a friend, you’d eagerly agreed.

Only to end up with her yogurt poured all over your head, ruining your hair and new uniform, and leaving you in tears. Her and her friends had laughed at you as she’d done it, and to top it all off she’d smiled cruelly as she asked; 

“Who would want to be friends with a loser like you?”

Her and her friends mocking laughter had been joined by the whole class until the teacher had run out, demanded to know what had happened and Mei Mei had then promptly blamed the whole thing on you. Your teacher, furious, had lectured you in front of everyone, before calling your mother, who had to leave work, to take you home for the day.

You’re still not sure what you did to Mei Mei to make her treat you that way.

And why it seems like she still hated you to this day.

-

“I’m gonna make you pay.”

Swallowing thickly, you shuffle on your feet, moving back to create some distance. “Mei Mei, I don’t know if you’re aware, but Sukuna is the one that—”

“Hit you?” Mei Mei cuts in, crossing her arms over her chest as she raises a brow at you. Your lips parted at her interruption, not really sure how to react given that it seemed she didn’t care that Sukuna was a complete and total asshole. Maybe, you guessed, it wasn’t even that but the fact she knew and still didn’t seem bothered by it “Yeah, I know,” she huffs, “and I’m glad he did it. You deserve it.”

Gaping at her, you shake your head; “I deserve it?”

She takes a menacing step forward and your body tenses, eyes carefully watching her movements. Mei Mei doesn’t seem bothered–the wicked smile on her face remains present and terrifying and there’s a certain manic edge to her eyes that has you swallowing thickly. You hate that you find yourself afraid of this girl, but the trauma roots deep from that fateful day in fifth grade when she’d played you like a fool and humiliated you in front of the whole class. You knew what this girl was capable of, and it was blatantly clear that she had some serious issues that allowed her to gain enjoyment from terrorizing others.

“You’ll see,” she growls. “You’ll regret the day you decided to ever try and be my friend.”

Your lips part and you’re stunned. Honestly, you’re not even sure what to say. Was she serious? She was angry at you… for what? You trying to be her friend when she was the one who offered in the first place? Or the fact that all along it had just been one big rouse to embarrass you? 

And somehow that was your fault?

Clearly this was far more than just Sukuna–maybe, for all you knew, he was just the cherry on top of her burning hatred for you.

Mei Mei is slamming into your shoulder before you can gather a coherent thought enough to speak, walking past you without another word and leaving you to watch her dissipating figure in absolute bafflement.

You stare at her for a moment longer, before there’s a buzz from your phone and you’re pulled from your thoughts.

Lunch.

That’s right. It was lunch. And if you weren’t quick, you’d miss it.

Not bothering to glance at your phone, figuring it was just Shoko wondering where you were or Gojo being annoying, you continue your way to the cafeteria. You make the mental note to talk to Shoko about Mei Mei, but push it from your mind nonetheless. Truthfully, you were just tired of having to deal with this whole Sukuna thing and it was easier to just push it from your mind and ignore it, then play into the reactions he and Mei Mei clearly wanted from you.

You’re turning the corner into the cafeteria, thinking about what you’d like to eat and keeping an eye peeled out for Shoko when you notice the stares. You don’t notice them right away, lost in your own thoughts, and then you catch the glare of a girl you’ve never even met staring at you from across the lunch way; with her, you notice the others.

It feels like everyone–it might as well be everyone–in that cafeteria is staring at you. And not just staring at you but glaring. Harshly. Their gazes burn with something nasty and there’s judgement clear on their faces as they stare back at you.

Just what was—

A hand latches around your wrist and instinctively, you gasp, body tensing in fear only to calm when you realize it’s Shoko.

You don’t notice the panicked look on her face right away, instead moving to ask; “hey, Shoko, is there something on my face? Because everyone—”

You notice it, however, when her grip on your wrist pinches.

“Y/N,” she breathes, panicked, “I—...”

-

Gojo has called you three times.

Three times.

And you still haven’t answered.

Pouting, Gojo glares at his phone – seriously, were you doing this on purpose?

Why were you ignoring him?

With one lasting glance at his screen, Gojo’s decision is made for him then. If you weren’t going to answer him, through text or call or otherwise, then Gojo would leave you with no other choice. 

He’d make you answer him.

-

“Shoko-san.”

Shoko isn’t quite sure what it is that Geto wants from him, but a single glance at the look in his eyes and she knows it can’t be anything good. 

Really, though, Shoko isn’t sure anything is good right now.

“Yeah?”

“Where’s Y/L/N?”

Ah. Straight to the point then.

Honestly, Shoko had figured that was what Geto was approaching her for anyways. She’d known Geto Suguru for years and while they had never had any animosity between each other, Shoko could hardly consider them friends. Acquaintances, maybe, and even that felt like it was stretching it a bit.

Truthfully, Geto had always just sort of been there and that was really it.

He’d known the guy since she was in pigtails and he was a snot-mouthed boy.

But Shoko wasn’t so oblivious to not have noticed that Geto had seemed to take a particular liking to you recently. It had started subtly and just kind of grown from there. You’d been particularly silent about it, but Shoko saw the way you sent Geto glances or the small smiles that Geto would send in return; she also knew that you’d gone to that amusement park with him and Gojo. 

And of course, considering recent events… well, Shoko would be just plain stupid to not have noticed.

“Home,” Shoko offers shortly.

The guy might be your friend, but he was still part of the reason why you were home — whether that was Geto’s fault or not Shoko still wasn’t sure.

“I need to talk to her,” Geto rushes, “she’s not answering my texts.”

There’s a certain odd sense of panic in Geto’s eyes that Shoko, despite knowing him for so long, is not sure she’s ever seen.

“You know why right?” Shoko decides to ask, quirking an accusatory brow at Geto. 

He sighs, shoulders slumping; “that’s why I need to talk to her.”

“Listen,” Shoko figures she’ll just cut straight to the point. She’s never been one to beat around the bush anyways. “If you know that, then you know why I can’t help you. If she wants to talk to you, she’ll answer. I’m not gonna give you anything. Especially because I don’t trust you had nothing to do with it.”

Geto huffs, “you really think I’d do that?” He asks, somewhat terse. “Besides, it’s my name that’s being dragged to the dirt too.”

“We both know nobody has anything negative to say about you or Gojo,” Shoko huffs, shaking her head. “But everyone certainly has plenty to say about Y/N. It’s fucked up. Sukuna’s the one that cheated on her, not the other way around.”

Just thinking about it is enough to get Shoko riled up all over again.

“Horrible things they’re calling her,” she continues, gauging Geto for his reaction. “Just because she’s been hanging out with you and Gojo. So don’t even try and pretend like you feel a shred of what she’s experiencing.”

Geto looks shocked and mildly impressed.

“Is she okay?” Is what he settles with.

Shoko scoffs, “what do you think?”

It looks like Geto wants to say more but doesn’t know what, or figures that it won’t get him any further. With a simple huff, he turns, but instead of heading to his desk like Shoko assumes he will, he turns and walks right out of the classroom.

-

He should’ve figured that Geto would come too.

“She’s not answering your texts either?” Gojo asks, coming to a stop in front of Geto, the both of them stood right by your front door.

“Nope,” Geto offers back shortly, offering a quick glance towards your door.

Gojo nods, slowly, “you know who started it?”

“Nope,” Geto repeats, but then; “figure it’s that Mei Mei girl.”

Gojo tsks, rolling his eyes as he slumps. “She’s awful. Nasty girl.”

“I don’t doubt that,” Geto agrees. Then, he gestures to your door. “Think she’ll answer?”

“I don’t plan on leaving until she does,” Gojo shrugs.

Geto smiles at that – it’s short and strained, but genuine nonetheless. With that, the two boys nod at each other and head up the steps to your front door.

Since Gojo’s in front, he knocks.

[gaysindistress]

Limits of a Fae Heart - four

Pairings: Azriel x Reader Summary: With war looming over their heads, the Inner Circle is desperate for a solution. The one they found comes in the form of a resurrected female who’s fated to not only their Shadowsinger but once to their enemy as well. Word count: 3.9k Warnings: mentions of past abuse (but no detailed descriptions), suggestive themes, things are heating upppp. One | two | three | five | six taglist: @dr4g0ngirl @isa1b2h3

Stern and tight voices make their way from downstairs to my room. I try to ignore them however the high pitches of their concern makes it hard to drown them out. Having finished bathing and scrubbing the blood from my skin some time ago, my hair is mostly dried so I leave it down as I dress. Clad in a pair of fitted high waisted black trousers and a simple black halter top, I make the awful decision to find out what the voices are talking about. 

Elain, Nesta, and Mor are sharing the sitting room couch while a red haired male stands by a window. Rhys and Feyre are against opposing doorways while Cassian and Azriel are between them. The sight of Rhys makes my skin crawl after my encounter earlier but I push down as I quietly descend the stairs barefoot. The shadows take notice of my entrance and start to grow restless causing a scene as Azriel hisses under his breath at them to behave. 

Feyre smiles at me and turns to face me while the rest of them simply watch me. While some are pleasant, they all view me with red tinted glasses and are guarded around me. I know the sight of me being so casual in their home makes them uncomfortable and even more so as my wings and scars catch the light. The red haired male peers at me through one russet colored eye and one golden mechanical eye. Nesta is stone faced and tight lipped as usual while Elain drifts from being a life sized doll to an unsettling wise woman. Mor lounges while Cassian watches his brother who is staring with a purpose at the wall. 

However none bother me more than Rhys at this moment.

With his Daemati talons, he’s trying to find a crack in my mental shields but to no avail. Add my earlier run in with the Ravens and to say I’m on edge is an understatement. The grating feeling of those talons against my mind is enough to make me forget my impulse control for half a second. I send him flashes of what happened on the rooftop as well as my time spent in between life and death. His violet eyes wide with what I think might be the closest thing to fear he’s let anyone see in years. If he wasn’t leaning against the doorway already, I’m sure the stumbling step back he takes would’ve sent him to the ground.

The entire room tenses and Feyre is at his side in the blink of an eye. She shoots me a fury filled look before her own caress touches my shields. The other three males have turned and are ready to attack if needed although it seems to pain Azriel to do so. 

I decide it’s better to not do the same to Feyre and simply shove her out. I take her place against the doorway, leaning against it with my arms crossed and wings drawn in tight. No one says anything and with how thick the air is, it appears that they’re all waiting for my explanation. 

“Next time I won’t be so gentle,” I inform Rhys with a saccharine smile while inspecting my nails.

“You were attacked and didn’t tell us,” he states, intentionally choosing to ignore my comment. Shadows dance nervously around the room and a few brave their way towards me. I let them come closer but my arms remain crossed over my chest and offer them no welcome to climb further. It concerns them more than anything and their chirping silence fills the room with unease.

I rolls my eyes at the way that everyone stands on even higher alert, “I handled it didn’t I?”

“That’s not the point.”

“So what is then?” I casually ask and the shadows curl around my legs, acting as a sort of armor. “You all knew already so why does it matter if I wasn’t the one to share that information?”

Rhys’ jaw tightens at my words and and so does the thread in my chest. My eyes dart to Azriel and there’s something sharp to his silence. He’s usually quiet and reserved but there’s an edge to the utter stillness and silence about him right now.

“We need to have trust between us. We can’t let…”

I cut Rhys off, “Trust? That’s an awfully big request considering our situation but the wrong one nonetheless. We don’t need to trust each other, we don’t even have to tolerate each other. All we need is an understanding; if you get what you want and I get what I want, then we’re all good. You brought me here to kill the King of Hybern and I’ll do that but only if you agree to leave me the fuck alone afterwards. I don’t think that’s too much to ask now is it?”

“You can’t…”

“I don’t think that’s too much to ask now is it? Or is this your way of telling me that you’re the one that can’t be trusted? I hope that you’re smarter than to try to pull one over me because the moment that I catch wind of anything untoward, I will make Velaris bleed.”

Cassian steps forward but Rhys holds his hand out and stops him. They share a look, more than likely speaking to each other via Rhys’ daemti abilities and stand down. Feyre steps up beside him, the perfect image of the High Lord and High Lady of the Night Court.

“Do not threaten my city or my family. You are not as irreplaceable as you’d like to think.”

“The same can be said for you.” I almost laughed as I said those words but Azriel kills the sound in my throat. The bastard tugs on the thread that connects us and sends a shiver through my body. The shadows around me hug closer as my wings flare out against my will and I hit my back hard against the doorway. 

He’s moved to stand in front of me as well as moved his shadows to do the same, effectively blocking us from everyone. 

“What are you doing?” I hiss at him although it sounds far more breathless than I intended. My body feels foreign; tingly and warm while fighting to remain frigid and distant. The heated memory of our kiss is still fresh on my lips while the image of his disbelief face flashes in my mind. 

“Stand down,” he whispers to me like I’m a cornered feral dog, “I don’t feel like cleaning up Cassian or Rhy’s blood.”

This infuriating male gazes down at me with all of the tenderness that I don’t deserve….i don’t… I don’t want it.

“Bold of you to assume you can command me,” I hiss at him and my wings twitch against the door frame. While he’s significantly taller than me, our wings stand at the same height. They’re almost perfect mirror images of each other, as if we were meant to be mates.

Shit.

Now staring at him, trying to be irate with him, the bond finds a way to make me want his tender heart and his sweet lips. It makes me want his coy smile and gentle touch. It forces me to want it all and it vibrates with joy. 

It’s rather quickly ruined by a wave of concern and subtle anger as Azriel’s eyes move from my face to my exposed skin. Raised red marks and indented brown ones litter my shoulders, arms, and back. His matching hands reach out for my arms. 

Our shadows fall away and reveal my room instead of the crowded one downstairs. The dark creatures find their place against the door, acting as a barrier between us and them. The male before me grasps my arms with such care and affection that it threatens to make my anger melt. He holds my elbows and turns my arms so they face up and he can actually look at the scars. A poignant sadness is etched into his features as he memorizes every little blemish. 

My wings quiver nervously when we make eye contact. I have to crane my head up to look at him with how tall he is. He’s taller than any other fae I’ve ever met and far more handsome as well. The beauty that lays effortlessly in his features makes even the world’s natural beauty look dull. His brothers are handsome but this male, Azriel, is ethereal and my soul is inexplicably tied to his. 

“Did he do this to you?” He finally asks with an intensity I wasn’t expecting. 

I can only nod, suddenly feeling the will to be stubborn and hardened fall away. He shakes his head and his grip grows firmer as he steps closer to me. I expected him to pull me into him but the fact that he was the one to close the distance feels too intimate. I make a half decent attempt to pull away and he loosens his grip, still keeping our eyes locked. There’s another lighter tug on our bond, this time it’s more of a question than a distraction. 

“Is this okay?” It seems to ask. 

Shaking my head, I pull away entirely but stay in my place. “No amount of kind gestures will convince me to accept the bond.”

“Reject it then.”

Confused hurt flashes across my face, “excuse me?”

“Reject the bond then. If that’s how you’ll accept my ‘kind gestures’ as you put it, then reject it.”

“You asked me not to only a few hours ago.”

“And I’m seeing now that I shouldn’t have. It wasn’t right of me to ask you to do something that’s already caused you so much pain,” his voice cracks slightly however he remains strong in his certainty. 

I can’t help the green envy that licks up my spine, “I suppose the youngest sister has nothing to do with your sudden change of heart.”

Azriel has the audacity to look offended. “Elain has nothing to do with this.”

“Elain,” I sneer at him and take that damning step towards him. He stays quiet and allows me to say whatever cruel thing I can think of to push him away. He takes my anger and makes it into light that spreads across our unaccepted bond. The fact that we can feel so much more than I did with the King spins webs of confusion in my heart. Nothing with Azriel feels the way it did with the King and I don’t know why. 

“I thought I might’ve felt something for her before I met you but I’ve realized that it was nothing more than platonic feelings. She knows that and she understands that nothing will ever happen between us.”

“Friends don’t rush to your side like that.”

His face breaks into a small smile, “maybe not but I didn’t notice. You were the only one I was looking at.”

That takes me by surprise. I find my resolve starting to crack even more as he continues to shock me. My mind races with a thousand thoughts and I can’t pick a single one to focus on. Instead what falls out is something I wish wouldn’t have, “Rejecting it could drive you into madness.”

Azriel steps closer, bridging our gap so we’re almost chest to chest now. He brushes my hair over my shoulders and cups my neck as he brings out foreheads together. My hands fly up to his chest, ready to shove him away if needed. 

“I’d rather live in madness than see you suffer like this.”

“You can’t mean that,” I breathe out as my eyes flutter closed to stop the tears from falling. 

“I already told you that I want only what you want. I will do anything you ask of me without any questions. If this is what you want, then it is what I want.”

The this feels like a double edged sword; this as in accepting him or this as in rejecting him. 

Our noses bump against each other and Azriel lets out a content sigh. I can feel his eyes close as his lashes brush against my cheek bone. The hand on my neck slides up until his thumb is under my jaw and is gently rubbing against my jaw bone. The sensation causes a tingling shiver to overcome me and my skin breaks out in goosebumps. I wasn’t aware of my hands sliding up his chest until they found their home playing with the hair at the nape of his neck. I didn’t feel his free hand on my hip until it digs into the soft skin there and urges us impossibly closer. 

“What do you want, sweet girl?” He whispers against my lips. They’re warm and soft and teasing and oh by the cauldron my brain ceases to work. I’m not even sure how my lungs are able to function either. All I know is that I can’t say the words so I push up on my toes and smash our lips together.

As if this male couldn’t get under my skin anymore, he moans into our kiss and drags me flush against his chest. The leather of his fighting gear is cold against my skin but it does nothing to soothe the feverish burn I’m starting to feel. 

Azriel lets me lead, keeping his kiss gentle but no less firm and passionate than mine. The hand on my waist drifts to my lower back and brushes past my wings in the process causing them to writhe in its wake. My own pathetic moan slips out and my hand grips at his hair, tugging it as I kiss him harder. His tongue finds its opportunity to slip in and I gladly welcome it by opening my lips to allow our tongues to mingle. 

Breathing feels more like a burden as it forces us to part and we reluctantly pull away. I let my hands fall from his hair and rest them on his chest. He softly guides me into his chest, letting the hand at my jaw slide back to my hair and the one at my back to wrap around my shoulders. I slide my own arms around his middle and cling to him as if we’ve been mated for years. He drops his head to rest on top of mine and I can feel his labored breaths against my hair. 

Our bond feels full and complete as we hold each other. 

Once, many years ago, I had dreamed of finding this and thought that I did in the King. I had been so full of hope and patience to make it work no matter how painful it was for me. For every token of affection I gave him, he returned it with insults, actions, and looks that were tenfold worse than before. I don’t know when I lost that part of me but I lost it so easily. It felt like it happened in a matter of days. One day that bright eyed and hopeful young Fae was there and then the next, gone. She slipped from my fingers like water does when you try to cup it. I hardly even noticed that she wasn’t there until it was too late and I couldn’t get her back but then I realized I didn’t want her back. She fell from me like a teacup that dropped onto an unforgiving kitchen floor. One day we were laughing and smiling at the sky and the next day, gone. It was like she was never even there to begin with. She walked right out and never turned back, leaving me to try and cope with the aftermath of her dreams. She left me when I needed her the most. I needed her to guide me through the years of abuse that I suffered at the hands of a male I thought I was Fated for. I needed her to stay and help me push through so that I could find a way to have the life she planned for me. 

I had resigned myself to a life of agony and caring for scars that would never truly heal. That was until the moment I saw Azriel. That was the moment I realized that everything I had believed for so long could’ve been wrong. When I saw this beautiful creature with twinkling eyes, soft lips, delicate cheeks, a perfect nose, and glowing skin emerge from the shadows, my reality shifted. When that bond snapped, I couldn’t imagine that this magnificently and terrifying beautiful male felt it too. I knew that I would never be satisfied with just being near him. I need him more than I would need myself. 

But when I so awfully told him that we were mates, I saw that look in his eye; it had snapped. There was a chance I could have him and he could have me. I could love him and watch the sunlight dances across his skin as he looks at me with the same adoration in his eyes. I could tell him about the admiration that runs so deeply that I don't know where it ends and I begin. The moment that that realization hit me, it shattered my reality and ran away to lick my wounds in isolation. 

Now as I hear his heartbeat and feel his breath in my hair, I can’t fathom why I would do such a thing. 

“It’s time to wake up.”

Blinding pain bursts through my body as I take my first breath of air after waking up. My lungs seize for a moment and I gasp for breath while I shoot forward on my bedroll. The calming scent of the forest and mist wrap itself around me as I slowly regain my senses. A small chuckle drifts from beside me and its owner makes a poor attempt to hide his smile as he pretends to dig around in his pack. 

“Say another word and I’ll slit your throat,” I mumble as I sit up and drag a cold hand over my face. 

“Wow you’ve just woken up and you’re already snapping at people. That’s a new record for you,” Cassian says with a sarcastic chuckle as he enters the pathetic excuse for a tent. 

I’m blinded by the sunlight that he lets in but I welcome its warmth after having slept on the freezing ground for the last couple of nights. Azriel moves to sit beside me and offers a thick sweater as well as some food to me as he tells his brother to kindly shut up. 

“Unless you want her to snap you, I’d suggest you leave her alone until she’s had time to…” he pauses for a second and glances down at me with a breathtaking smile, “to process that you’re real and not a figment of her imagination.” 

“You know, I thought when you found your mate that she would make you friendlier and generally a warmer person but this one has had the opposite effect on you.”

Azriel is still smiling at me and I can only handle his open affection for so long. Quickly, I pull the sweater that is absolutely his as it smells just like him and settle my bored gaze on Cassian. 

“Or you’ve just gotten more annoying and he’s fed up with it.”

Cassian gaps at me and looks at Azriel for help who just shrugs his shoulders. “I’m deeply wounded that you think I’m annoying. I’m a pleasure to be around. I am a delightful person once you get to know me.”

“As I am,” I throw back at him with my own small smile. Cassian doesn’t catch it as he leaves us but the male next to me does.

Azriel doesn’t say anything but his gentle actions towards me tell me that he saw it. He takes my hands, rolls up the sleeves of the sweater, and pulls my hair out of the collar. A shiver races down my spine as his fingers brush against my skin and his smile grows into a smirk. It falters as he catches a glimpse of the raised lines that trail across my shoulders and neck before disappearing under his sweater. I thought it would be better to hide my wings while we were on our little mission. I refused to let Rhys or Feyre near them, choosing to use an elixir that a healer made for me in Velaris. The effects would only last for a few days but having them visible and therefore vulnerable isn’t something I want. Besides that the only one I’d even let come within a ten foot radius of them would be Azriel; a fact I haven’t told him but one he knows to be true in his heart.

The mission that we are on is one that I reluctantly agreed to. Rhys was given permission to search my mind for any information that they could use against the King but as I’d already told them, he found nothing of use. The Ravens that attacked me had not been the only ones in the city and they had unintentionally left a trail of breadcrumbs back to a war camp about 20 miles outside of Velaris. Rhys thought it would be worthwhile to send Cassian, Azriel, and myself to investigate and gather what information we could. I knew that it would be pointless and I tried to tell Rhys that but he didn’t seem exactly interested in hearing what I had to say.

Although I agreed to his mission, I made it clear that I would be calling the shots and that included having authority over his brothers. Cassian had a fit while Azriel didn’t seem to have a problem with it. Of course that incited teasing and banter from both Cassian and Rhys but Azriel held strong in his approval. 

“She knows the King the best. I’d trust her judgment more than anyone else’s,” he told them and my chest swelled with pride. 

Cassian challenged him by asking what if he didn’t agree with it and Azriel repeated his statement. 

“If I didn’t think I could fully trust and rely on her to do this, then I wouldn’t have bothered even telling you she existed.”

A part of me wanted to believe his sweet words but the other side told me that it was all an act to manipulate me. The bond between us, however, preened with warmth unlike before.

I find myself smiling as he softly calls my name and brings me back to the present. 

“Are you ready?” 

“Yeah,” I sigh and pull on my boots that were waiting for me next to my bedroll. After I finish tying the last one, I turn to see him still watching me with those twinkling eyes. “Can I help you?”

“May I kiss you?” 

My brows shoot up and I stare at him skeptically. He repeats his question as if I hadn’t heard it. 

Shaking my head, I tell him, “No I heard you. I just wasn’t expecting that.”

Azriel dips his head down and tilts my chin up with his forefinger so he can look me in the eye. “It surprises you that I’d ask to kiss you?”

Words fail me as I search his face for a hint of something, anything at all that would tell him he’s being disingenuous. There’s nothing but those tempting plush lips and a hooded look to his eyes.

His smirk returns in full force and he draws me closer to whisper against my lips, “Why wouldn’t I want to kiss my sweet girl?”

“Because I’m not your sweet…” my thoughts trail off as my eyes flutter close and I take in a sharp breath at the feeling of his lips ghosting over mine. 

“You’re not what?” He pulls away just as I start to lean in and I nearly growl at him. 

“I’m not your sweet girl,” I growl as frustration grows inside of me.

The bond even sides with him and waves of several emotions flood me but the one that hits me the hardest is his desire. Flashes of white hot pleasure crash into me and I surge forward to capture his lips. He reciprocates eagerly and we both immediately get caught up in branding each other’s lips. I barely notice him leaning us backwards until my back hits my bedroll and he’s between my legs.

I become too preoccupied with the overwhelming feeling of him all around me and without thinking, I arch up into him drawing a heated moan from both of us. Azriel’s hands were firmly planted on either side of my head but after my moan slipped out, he dropped down to his forearm and is now holding my thigh against his hip in a bruising grp. He tentatively rolls his hips against mine, pressing his growing bulge against my core, and on instinct mine meets his and so begins the desperate dance of grinding hips. I feel a smirk tug on his lips at the wild movements of my hips. 

Arching my back and tightening my leg around his waist, I bit down on his bottom lip and as his hips stuttered with a drawn out moan, I smirk back at him. Before he can get his revenge, Cassian calls out for Azriel. He pulls away from me with a heavy sigh and drops his head into the croak of my neck. 

“Your dog is calling for you,” I say with a breathy chuckle and playful shove at his shoulders. The male above me groans but climbs to his feet and pulls me up with him. 

“He’s not a dog.”

“Fine your bat is calling for you.”

“Don’t let me hear you say that,” he chuckles while gazing down at me with desire. He presses a quick but powerful kiss to my lips with a promise “We’ll finish this later, sweet girl.”

“I’m not your sweet girl.”

“We’ll see about that.”