#rewatching at first made me pissed at nikki
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piperslovebot · 5 months ago
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Too Old To Trick-Or-Treat, Too Young To Die (T7S 3x04) || Hold My Hand (T9S 2x04)
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Shout at the Devil
A/N: Happy Halloween! I’m back! And if feels good to be writing again. I’ve been rewatching Supernatural and started working on this earlier this month. I hope y’all enjoy it! Nikki Sixx summons a demon.
Trigger Warnings: Mentions drugs, drug use, sex, language, the occult and death.
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Dec 30 1981
Dirt and rocks crunched under my boots with every step, carrying me further down the backroad as I mentally went over the list of things I’d need, according to the chick at the occult store.
Shovel, check.
Jar of grave yard dirt, check.
Bone of a black cat, check.
Photo of myself, check.
Full moon, check.
All things I’d need to summon a demon. Supposedly.
As I closed in on the crossroads, I began to sweat. I was rethinking my leather jacket. Or maybe it wasn’t the heat, El Niño weather, but fear. Either this would work, and I’d be facing a demon, or it wouldn’t and I’d be pissed.
I stopped right in the center of the gravel paths and looked up at the road sign.
“Error Way and Badd Road” I read aloud to no one. “Huh, wonder if that’s an omen.”
Shrugging off the slight unsettled feeling in my gut, I let the shovel hit ground with a loud ping.
“Time to dig” I mumbled begrudgingly.
I focused on the task at hand to keep the fear and doubt from tickling back into my thoughts. This shit had better be worth it.
Dig a hole just deep enough to bury the jar, and wait. How long would I wait? The chick at the metaphysical store hadn’t given me many details. She didn’t even want to tell me how it was done at first. Luckily I can be pretty persuasive.
I grew more impatient with every mound of dirt I piled next to the small opening in the earth I had created.
“Fuck it, that’s good enough” I sighed, taking the photo of myself from my pocket, I had to cut some chick out of the picture, hopefully that wouldn’t matter. The cat bone was already in the jar, along with the grave yard dirt. Quickly I shoved the photo in the jar, and screwed the lid back on. I knelt down, gently placing the jar in the hole. I stared at it for a moment before I grabbed a handful of dirt and slowly began to cover it. My own face staring back at me from the photo behind the glass. I sighed as I dusted my hands off.
“Now what?” I murmured as I looked around.
I fully took in my surroundings for the first time. The moon in the sky was bright enough to light up everything, but it wasn’t warm like the suns light, it was cold. Everything was tinted in hues of blue and grey. The darkness of the shadows seemed endless.
It wasn’t until I shifted to stand that I realized, there weren’t any typical night sounds. No crickets, no rustling of leaves, not even the hoot of an owl. In that moment I truly understood the meaning of, the silence was deafening. It caused a pit in my stomach. My fight or flight was kicking in.
“Screw it” I said, as I turned quickly on my heels only to be stopped before I could move further.
“Shit” I yelped, startled.
An stunning woman was standing before me. Her waist length brown hair, framed her pale face, with full dark lips. She was clad in leather that hugged every curve of her body. As alluring as she was, her eyes made my blood run cold. They were red. Glowing, fiery, red.
“Wow” I breathed.
“Thanks”. Her voice was like silk, it was as if the single word ran smoothly down my spine, causing me to shiver.
“I honestly didn’t know what to expect” I admitted, for some reason.
“I come in whatever form appeals to you. Now, you called, I answered, I’m assuming you want to make a deal.” She said, slowly moving towards me, her body swaying seductively.
“A deal? Right, yeah. I um...I want Motley Crue to be famous, world wide. I want fame, fortune, women, tours, multi platinum albums. I want it all.” I blurted.
I’d never said the words out loud before. I’d said it all without thinking. Just a brief pause, and I’d lost control of my own voice. My own thoughts. It was surprising to hear the words coming from my mouth. No matter how true they were.
A smile slowly spread across her lips. It wasn’t friendly, but also not pure evil. It was a knowing and ,somehow, condescending smile. Her red eyes flickered, with what I can only assume was the pleasure she was getting from this moment.
“Well, you don’t want much, do ya?” She cooed.
“I deserve it” the words flew from my mouth before a thought even formed in my mind.
Her brows peaked as a laugh bubbles from her mouth. It wasn’t a pleasant, happy sound, it was guttural. Evil. I froze in fear.
I swallowed thickly as she spoke.
“You do, huh? Well then, I’ll give you six years, Nikki Sixx, instead of the standard ten.”
“What...what do you mean? Like when you’ll take my soul?” I questioned, seems I wasn’t as prepared as I thought.
“Oh no, handsome, I already have that” she said, her hand flicking open. A small, bright orb shimmered in here palm. It seemed to be trying to escape her, it began darting around, held back by some invisible force.
Quickly, she curled her hand into a fist crushing the light. As she did I felt a sharp pain deep within my chest. It’s intensity causing me to gasp, and grab at my shirt. I doubled over, trying to catch my breath. Bright, star bursts clouding my vision.
As the pain subsided I looked back at her, a sinister expression played on her face.
“Six year to what?” I panted, standing to my full height again. My hand still planted firmly on my chest.
“Until you die” she replied, so matter of factly.
“Wha...” I huffed.
“Yeah, that’s all part of the deal. Didn’t anyone tell you that?” I asked, cocking her head. She was enjoying this. Her expression hid nothing.
“No” I said quietly.
“Well” she hummed “you’re welcome to turn back now...I’ll play nice.”
The look on her face told me otherwise.
“Six year...” I hummed. I’d live past 27, unlike Hendrix, Morrison. I could do a lot in six years. Have a lot of fun. Make a lot of money. Bag so many chicks. Do so many drugs.
“How it will happen?” I asked, the demons eyes trained on me as I began to paced.
“Oh I don’t know. I haven’t thought of the how yet. But my babies will find you” she shrugged.
“Babies?” I asked cluelessly.
I wasn’t clueless long. Soon there was a rustling in the tall grass, growls and barks followed. But there was nothing there as the sounds drew closer.
“What the hell!” I panicked. Moving backwards away from the unseen. The unknown. I was being cornered but nothing, or nothing visible.
“Ha! Yes!” She said, almost giddy. “Hellhounds. My babies!”
I spun around as I felt her hand on my shoulder, the growls and barking stopping.
“Do we have a deal?” She asked, her voice low, her eyes searing into mine. I was sure I’d see them in my nightmares for years to come. I could hear the echoes of screams in my mind as she stared me down. But they weren’t my own, they were other souls. Souls shed collected. As loudly as they screamed, they couldn’t stop what happened next.
The word slip passed my lips, quietly, little more than a breath, “yes.”
“Perfect!” She clapped her hands together like some demonic cheerleader, reveling in her conquest. Her smile growing larger and more sinister.
“So....now what? Do I sign your book or whatever?” I asked.
“Book? Do I look like Lucifer? Is it’s 1692? This isn’t some Hawthorne story, Goodman Brown.” She laughed, although I wasn’t sure if she was laughing at me or her own jokes.
“No no...you kiss me.” She said, her lips curved into a devious smirk.
“I kiss you...as in, sealed with a kiss?” I asked.
“Where do you think the term came from?” she laughed, moving closer to me.
My body responded on its own. Leaning towards her. But my mind told me to run. Scream. My body didn’t care if she was dangerous.
Here crimson eyes raked over my face, down my body, and back up. She licked her lips before a hiss passed over her clenched teeth.
“You’ll be so fun to play with” she whisper, her hand snaking up my chest, before she grabbed my chin roughly. In a blink her lips were on mine. The white hot heat of an electric current rocketed through my body, from my lips to my toes and back again.
As quickly as it happened, it was over.
“Ouch” I said through my fingers as I rubbed my lips.
“Ya got six years handsome, make em count. And...enjoy the fame.” She quipped before turned on her heels, and started walking away from me.
Flames began crawling up her legs as she moved, and swiftly made their way up her figure. As confusion and panic started spike, she was gone. Not even a cloud of smoke remained.
“Now what?” I asked out loud. Bewilderment over the past five minutes settled in. Did that really happen? Was the band going to become more famous then we could imagine? Did I really only have six years?
I picked up the shovel as I began to make my way back to my car. I guess we’d have to wait and see.
Dec 23, 1987
Usually I heard what sounded like people talking when I was high. Causing me to fire off my gun and shoot at unseen intruders. But today, and the past few days, it was dogs. I heard dogs barking and growling. Clawing at my doors. I knew the only answer was to shoot up again. It was always the only answer.
But I knew they were her dogs. Waiting for me. It was closing in on six years. She’d kept her end of the deal, we had it all. And I made sure to drink it, snort it, fuck it and shoot it all.
At the hotel I was too shaken and physically shaky to shoot myself up. The dogs were getting closer. Slash was there, but too fucked up to help, so I asked the dealer.
“Do it for me?” I mumbled, trying to tie off my arm. “The dogs won’t stop otherwise.”
“Dogs?” he huffed with a humorless laugh. “If the money weren’t so good, I might tell you you need to cut back.”
“Shut up, asshole” I said through clenched teeth as I held onto the belt as tightly as I could.
Soon I felt the comforting pinch of the needle as it sank into my skin. I watched as the plunger dropped and released the belt. My eyes slammed shut. The normal feeling of peace and pain relief didn’t hit me. And the dogs didn’t stop barking.
They got louder. Closer. I could feel their breath on my face. Feel them around me.
My eyes flew open, and I was shocked to find myself standing at the crossroads.
“What the hell?” I gasped.
“Oh this isn’t hell....not yet.” A familiar, silky voice spoke from behind me.
The same pit formed in my stomach as I gradually turned towards the sound of her voice.
When I faced her head on, she looked the same as she did the night I made a deal with her. She was sexy, but pure evil seeped out of her.
“Hello handsome” she cooed, soothingly. Her eyes glowing. They’d haunted me for years. I swore I felt them watching me, constantly.
“You made me OD?” I asked, I thought her dogs were going to rip me to shreds before that hit. “Not very creative.”
“No,” she admitted “you did that on your own. You’re reckless, which I like.”
She winked at me as I scoffed.
“But you really didn’t make this much fun for my babies or myself. Usually they have a good nibble at someone before we’re reunited. And I had everything planned out perfectly!” She plastered a faux pout on her lips.
“Sorry to disappoint.” I said, irritated.
“Oh, maybe I’ll still let them have a bit or two,” she replied, her vicious smile returning to her face.
“I’m dead then? The ride is over?” I asked. Not ready to truly believe it.
She nodded as she moved towards me, her body swaying side to side, like a snake. Her eyes burning brighter.
“Now it’s time to have some fun” she whispered, her arms wrapping around my neck, and her fingers crawling up my hair. Feeling like spiders.
“For who?” I spit.
“Oh” she chuckled “for me of course. You’ve had your time. Now...it’s my turn.”
She leaned closer, her lips brushing me ear as she whispered, “I’m gonna enjoy this.” Her tongue shot out, licking my cheek.
I shook her off as her evil laugh spilled from her mouth. Who knew someone so hot could make my skin crawl.
“Ready?” She asked, as she began to walk backwards, I felt a pull. Like a rope was tied around me, tugging at me. Drawing me towards her. With her.
But I wasn’t ready. I hadn’t ever expected demons to be real, or even the deal we made. She’d coerced me, pulled the thoughts and wishes from my mind before I even had a chance to reconsider. But that’s what you get when you mess with demons I guess.
I dug my heels in the ground.
“No” I said through gritted teeth. I wasn’t ready.
“Excuse me?” She hissed. Her face contorted, illuminated by the glow of her eyes.
“No!” I yelled.
Suddenly I sat up. Gasping. Sweating. With a sharp pain in my chest.
I quickly glanced around, I wasn’t at the crossroads any longer. I had never been more relieved to be in an ambulance. As I looked down towards the pain, I saw two syringes stuck in my chest.
I looked towards the man sitting by my side and said the only thing I could.
“Ouch!”
1988
After the withdrawals and a lot of therapy, I was feeling better. I was sleeping, eating, showering.
And writing.
When I was high, I was too focused on my next high. Now I was craving a new album, especially after the canceled tour.
I wasn’t sure if what I experienced that night, or even the whole ordeal with the demon has been real. Was it all the drugs? Has I lost my mind for years and no one noticed? Or maybe they did, but didn’t want to crash their gravy train. Whatever the case, I tried not to dwell on it, but during the withdrawals she haunted my fevered dreams. Her wicked laugh, her sinister eyes. They were nothing but nightmare fuel, no matter how pretty the package.
I had my nose in a notebook, as I plucked at my bass strings when there was a knock on my rehab room door.
“You have a visitor” said the young male nurse who popped in “they’re outside, on the lawn.”
“Thanks” I said, letting my pencil drop. I carefully laid my guitar on the bed, as I stood and stretched. I’d been sitting there for a few hours. I wasn’t expecting anyone, but I liked having visitors.
I grabbed a cup of coffee as I made my way out to the lawn. I shielded my eyes from the setting sun, as I looked around. There were people milling around, but all the tables were empty, except one. It was the furthest from the door. And the figure sitting there made my blood freeze in my veins.
It couldn’t be.
I slowly and cautiously walked towards her. Her long hair hanging over the back of the chair. Her leather clan legs crossed one over the other. I was glad her back was to me. I wasn’t ready to face her yet.
I stopped a few feet from the table, trying to gather my courage.
“Come, sit with me” she said, not bothering to turn around.
I exhauled loudly, I hadn’t even realized I was holding my breath. I steadied myself as I walked around the table and took the seat across from her.
I set my coffee on the table before I lowered myself into the chair. I hadn’t looked at her yet, I focused on the cup, the chair, my feet, anything but her. I could feel her gaze on me though. Burning a hole through my skin, which she could likely do.
I closed my eyes before raising my face towards her.
Slowly I forced my eye lids open, and looked at her. A smirk played on her lips, but her terrifying eyes were hidden behind large dark sunglasses, much to my relief.
“Hello again, handsome” she cooed, as I leaned back slightly in my chair.
“Come to take me back to hell?” I asked.
She chuckled before sighing dramatically.
“You never made it to hell, handsome, what a pity.” She replied, “no, I’m actually here to return this to you.”
She laid her hand on the table, palm up, as a small, dim light flickered in her hand.
“My soul” I whispered, staring at the light as it seemed to brighten when I spoke.
“Yeah” she sounded irritated, “seems you found a loop hole in our deal. You died, but you were brought back. So this no longer belongs to me.”
Without hesitation, I reached for the light, but she quickly pulled her hand away. Taunting me.
I looked back at her, the glasses now on the tip of her nose, revealing her demon eyes.
“Unless, of course” she hissed “you want to make another deal.” Her ruby lips curled into an evil grin.
“No” I mumbled.
“No? You don’t sound so sure” she pressed.
“No.” I bit back.
“Fine, you’re really no fun now” she groaned, her hand extending closer to me. I reached for it again, and just as my finger tip brushed the edge of the light, I felt a jolt shake my body. Warmth flooded every bone, every muscle, every cell in my body.
She continued to stare at me, rolling her blood red eyes as my body stop shaking. She’s lost at her own game, it seemed to be new for her, and not something she seemed to relish.
“Thank you” I said, even though I wasn’t sure why.
Her eyebrow peaked as she pushed the sunglasses back up her nose.
“Enjoy it, I guess” she shrugged before quickly getting to her feet, “you know how to find me when you need me.”
“I won’t need you” I said quickly.
“We’ll see, handsome” she said before blowing me a kiss “we’ll see.”
@niksixx @nikki-fucking-sixx @nikkisiexx @nikkisixxwiththebass @xxisxxisxxis
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finding-the-daylight · 4 years ago
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So, now that my finals are officially over, I am going to proceed to have a drink or two or three and rewatch Eclipse. Here’s (soberly) what I remembered from the film prior to starting this account (since starting this account, posts re:Eclipse have reminded me of things I’m not going to include in this introduction): 
1. Bella is basically playing tic-tac-toe with Edward and Jacob and her feelings for them. She can’t make up her mind. When I watched it the first time, my dad was in the living room half paying attention to it and said she was very selfish. 
2. Edward tries to control Bella, but it’s “out of genuine concern for her”.
3. Jacob tries to control Bella, but it’s “out of genuine concern for her”.
4. Both fight for her affection and even though she’s engaged to Edward, she won’t let go of Jacob.
5. When the newborn army shows up, Bella cuts her arm with a rock.
6. There’s awkward tension in the tent.
That’s literally all I remember of the movie while sober (aside from what I have relearned from posts about Eclipse on this blog). My drunken thoughts will be below the break:
Okay, so this dude I think his name is Riley is lowkey kinda dumb, no offense. Like he just stood there and screamed “WHAT DO YOU WANT?!?” This is how all horror movies end badly. You don’t talk back. You run or hide or esape.
THE MEADOW IS SO FUCKING PRETTY. IT’S THE PUREST THING WE HAVE IN THIS FANDOM OMG HE’S PLAYING WITH EHR HAIR AND I JUST WANT SOMEOEN TO PLAY WITH MY HAIR. DAMN BELLA, MY FINALS ARE OVER. SUCKS TO SUCK, DOESN’T IT?
I never noticed the CUllen cuff before, but now thanks to this blog it’s all I’m looking @ lmao. 
I FCKING LOVE CHARLIE TOO MUCH AND HE DESERVED BETTER THIS WHOLE TIME. HE IS SUCH A GOOD FATHER AND HE DESERVES THE BEST.
THERE’S A GLOWING RED LIGHT OUTSIDE MY WINDOW WTF I THINK IT’S THE REFLECTION OF A CAR LIGHT BUT I FUCKING SWEAR
NVM ITS GONE
WHAT THE FUCK EDWARD?? YOU MESSED WITH BELLA’S TRUCK SO SHE COULDN’T SEE HER FRIEND? FUCK. I WOULD’VE DUMPED YOU AND LEFT YOU IN THE WOODS BRO.
Edward sitting with Bella’s friends. We can’t help but stan. He’s still a bitch for the truck thing though. 
I love how Alice looks @ Edward and tells him the party will be fun because she knows nothing bad will happen. But then he reads her mind and looks conerned wtf is ognna happen?
Side note: I really like the lighting in this movie. Everyone has a healthly glow. They lokk happy.
The fucking Volturi always gotta ruin everything. Bitch ass hoes. Ol’ crusty asses acting like some outdated monarchy. Why don’t the vamprires start a democratic government?
Charlie really deserved better. Like I know they couldn’t tell him teh truth but they could’ve been slightly less untruthful prbabl.
I WANNA FIND SOMEONE WHERE MY MOM SAYS WE’RE LIKE MAGNETS WITH EACH OTHER. I WANT SOMEONE TO LOOK @ ME LIKE I’M THE CENTER OF THE UNIVERSE. DAMNIT EDWARD. DAMNIT STEPHENDW. 
Y’ALL ARE TELLING ME THE ENTIRE CULELN CLAM COMBINED COULDN’T TKAE OUT VICTORIA? THIS SHIT IS GETTING UNREALISTIC LMAO.
THE MUSIC THAT STARTS PLAYING WHEN JAKE TURNS AROUND IN THE PARKING LOT SENT ME LMAOOOOO. 
Leah is such a badass and I wnat to be best friends with ehr plase. 
ALSO FCK THIE IMPRINTING STORYLINE. 
SAM AND LEAH WERE HAPPY TOGETHER.
NO BELLA YOU DON’T FUCKING WANNA KNOW WHAT IMPRINTING IS. NONE OF US WANTD WTO KNWO. IT NEVER SHOULDVE BEEN WRITTEN.
Taylor and Kristen are such babies in this movie. They’re so young and precious. WHIH REMINDS ME WHY TF DID SPTHEJNFNWFNA MAKE THIS SEIRESO ABOUT CHIDLREN??!?! I STILL SAY IF THE CHARACTERS HAS BEWNNF MORE MATUEE AND IN LIKE THEIR MID OR LATE TWNETIEMS OR THIRTIS IT WOULD HAVE BEEN BETTER. FIUCKUNG FIGHT ME.
INITING BELLA TO HEAR THE TRIBE’S HISTORIES? THE CULTURAL APPROPRIATION FUCK STEPHEN0AWFJQ. BITCHJ.
SETH IS SO PRECIOUS. AGAIN. THEY’RE ALL SUCH BABIES. THESE POOR CHILDREN.
this hwoel shite is sof ukcing offensie. bitch. listen. why tf did stpehwb fafb have to appropriate cultues like this? BITCH>> you do realize if the legnds are actually like this they’rel ike that because it’s aout defeating yo white as sright? like your’e aware stpehebe ? 
omg bree is so scare d poor baby. literally why did stephenjdbawfbi do this? she just wnated to be ok not hurt anywaon.
exuce me vut CARLISLE IS HOT AS FUCK BITCH
edward is saying some real romantic shit and i sill hate him for the turck thing but like he loves her so much btu he’s stil an asshoel in this smovie
I’M ABOUT TO HATE JACOB I CAN FEEL IT IN MY BONES I’VE SEEN THE GIFS HOE WE GONNA GIGHT. BITCH SHE JUST TOLD YOU SHE DOESN’T LIKE YOU DON’T PUSH HER LIKE THIS. DUMBAS S HOE BITCH. YOU’RE GONNA FIGHT FOR HER? I’M GONNA FUCKIN FIGHT YOU BTCH. I WISH SHE WAS ALREAYD A VAMPIRE SO RTHAT PUNCH WOULDA HURT BITCH YOU DESERVED IT.
THESE FUCKWITS ARE FIGHTING OVER HER AND NOT LISTNEING TO HER THEY ARE BOTCH CANCELLED. BELLA NEEDS TO LEAVE BOTH THESE HOES AND GET A NEW MAN WHO ACTUALLY KNOWS HOW TO LISTNE. BITCHES.
I love Emmett so much. BELLA SHOULD FINA A MAN LIKE HIM. IT’S WHAT SHE DESERVES.
ROSALIE IS ABOUT TO POP TF OFF. SHE IS A QUEEN AND I LVOE AND SUPPORT HER. the saddest thing about this is that she thought her life was perfect and then some fucking asshoes ruiend it. she was so happy. wtf im gonna cry. fuck. i hate sptehej n so much. these gross ass hoes i’m gonna cik all theyre assses. this is so gross i’m so angry literaluy setthing beithc. BUT THEN SHE GETS HER REVENGE AND IT’S BEAUTIFUL. FUCK THOSE BASTARS. but she;s so sad it breaks my heart. she wants to be human so bad. this scene is so sad and it’s theonly good scene in twilight and nikki reed deserves an ocsa like if you agree.
jane and alec more childrne who should’ve been able to be children fck the volturie
why the hel is jessica the fucking valedinact ion? it should’ve been bella they made her seem so damn smart but now she’s not theo ne? i don’ beliee it. but anna kendrick is a gift and now i wanna watch ptiche perfect. CHARLIE is so pure he deserved better and i’m gona kep saying it.
i love those fucking rose colored lamps hanging at the cullens house int he window at hte party scene can anyone link them to me i need? 
why the hell is the wolfpack athe cullesn hosue? this doesnt make sense and it doesn’t seem real am i too drunk and imabginf this?
jno wait it’s real. jake’s appolgoizng.
how fucking conventinet the woflpakc is there hwen alice realizes there abotu to be attacked. this aint realistc. bitc.
why are these kids being forces to act like audls? “I wans;t asking for permission” hoe you’re like 16 go home and go tib ed and odnt go to war.
these woflies gonan kick yo ass edward get tf out
i’m laughign nrow but nothigng funy is happening lmaoooo
fck carlisle is really hot as fuck his jawline kills me
i hate jasper’s hair here i’m sorry i know we all lovehim bt heis hair is a dam nmess
belal is so fuckign negative all the time no one is gonan get killed exceptsvictoris
THE COWBOOIIIII WHY DOES HE LOOKS LIKE OWNE WILSON IN THIS DAMN LIGHTIN? ALICE AND JASPER LOVE EACH TOHER SO MUCH MY APLOGIZKE MAAM FCK IT UP.
why thfe fuck is hake comparing his situaton with leah and sam and emily? We are nto the same hoe wae are not the same. bella is choosing edward sit yo ass down. but i still thin kyall are both problemastic as fuck in thos movie and hse deserves better.
CHARLIES DESEVRS  BTETER THEY KEEP LYIGN EVEN WHEN THEY DUCKGN DONT NEED TO
reblog if you thought edward and bella wre gona fuc, when she went over to his house in eclipse when yo ufirst read the book or saw the movue
he really oes love her a lot though fkcn i’m so alone 
 he looks si sad wgen he mentind ices tea on the porch poor edward
EVERY DANM MOMENR OF FOREVER BITCG I WANT  LOVE LIK THST 
LITERALLY THIS IS THE SUTPEIDEST PLOT EVER. A WHOLE FUCKIN ARMY TOO ATTACK ONE IGRL? BITCH. THIS AINT EVEM A THING. 
im gettign ral tired yall dik if i waill mke it to the end of this movie but i will tru
i hate the enrgey from jae and efard in this tent. ya’ll are both dumb hoes and she could do better than either ofy ou. 
WRHAT THE FUCK FASTER IF YOUR TOOK YORU CLOTHS OFF BITCH WHAT THE FUCK NOW I AM GONNA FUCKIN PUNCH YOU IB HOEP BELLA OUBCHES YOU WHEN SHES A VMAPRIE STUPID HOE 16 YEAR OLD SHOULD BE AT HOME IN BED INSTEAD OF IN A TENT TRYING TO FIGH A FCUKCN WAR
edward is such an emo boi in the tent and he thinsk she doesn;t lve him any more. yo ua stipiud hoe edearf but she still loves you anwyab ithc.
wheb edward said i’m not gonna force her into naythign ever agin i realized he was hte better man good for you eddie you fickun manned up you win
MY REASON FOR ESXITNST HOE I JST WNAT TO BE LOVED
now edwards bene a fuckboi again trying to hurt jake b ymaking sure he knew they were getting maried edward what the fuck iw was just starting to be on your side agian and you let me down like this
jacob is beign an emo boi now jake go be a child @ home and stop this nonsense you’re not a man go be a chid and take a nap and eat some grilled cheese youkk feel better
now she told him she wants to kiss him wtf bella don’t kead this bitch on he’s already in pain let hom gp home and eat a grilled cheese
mow bella’ supsetti spaghetti because edwards know she kissed jake
this shit is so unenecasialr dramtic wht the fuck yall  like a whole army ofver one girl and then its like all everyboyd trying kill everybody this is bulshittheyre all children who should eb at home eating grileld chesses not at war
victoria is a real bitch lying to this boy telling hin she lvoes him hoe bitch
og shit efward ifs pissed now he’s tauntign ab ithc
i acutaly kinda fel bad for riley he wnet through so mcuh and was manipulated i wish the cullens could have adopted him and bree
oshit is the volutire 
SAM DONT FUCKUGN TALK TO LEAH LIKE THAT EVER AGIAN YOU HOE
CARLISE AND I REPEAT AGAIB IS HOT AS FUCK FUCK CARLISRL
I LITERALLY AHTE THE VOLTURIE FOR KILLIGN VREE THEY WILL NEVER BE FORGIVEN
JASPER KNOWS WHATS GOOD HE DOESN’T TURST THESE HOES
I’M SO PISEED THAT THE CULLENS NEVER FUCKING IFHT THE VOLTURIE LIKE CARLISLES IS SMART AS FUCK AND EHS TILL WONT START A DEMOCRAY LIKE YALL KNOW ROSLAIE WOULDVE FOGUHT FOR THAT SHIT TOO
 I LVOE YOUDADY CARLISLE
THIS 16 YEAR OLD LYING UP HERE BECAUSE OF TE DUMBASS WAR I TOLD YALL TO GO GOEN AND EA A GRILELD CHEDWE
poor jakie he knows hed better good for her but she reallys loves eward jake deserved better than what he got reblog is youf agree he jst said he’s even love her after she’s a vamprie bruh go eat a grilled chease and love yourself
WERE BACK IN THE FUCKING MEADOW ITS LIT AND ITS LOVELY I WANNA FALL IN LOVE IN A MEADOW WITH A HANDAOME MYSTERIOUS MAN WHO LOVES ME UNCODNITONATLY
KIRSTNE STEQARD IS THE WBEST AND SHE DESERVED AN OSCAR FOR THIS MOVIE HER AND NIKKI REED AND NODBOYD ELSE
fianlly this bitch is gonna beh onest with chalrie took you long enough
that was an anticlamtnc ending but i love love
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sunnydaleherald · 4 years ago
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The Sunnydale Herald Newsletter - Tuesday, September 29th
(Vamp) "What's that smell? Geez, slayer, is that you?" (Buffy) "I've been working." (Vamp) "Where? In a slaughter house?" (Buffy) "Doublemeat Palace." (Vamp) "Ooh. You know what? Let's just call it a night. If it's all the same to you, and you've been eatin' that stuff, I'm not so sure I wanna bite you." (Buffy) "You're dead. You smell like it. How do you get to say I'm the one who's stinky?"
~~As You Were~~
This issue's editor: lipsofspike
Submit a link to be included in the newsletter!
[Drabbles & Short Fiction]
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Sing it Out (Fuffy)  by RavenclawSlayer
[Chaptered Fiction]
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The Book of Averted Prophecy: Chapter 1 (Spike/Xander)  by madimpossibledreamer
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These Violent Delights, Chapter 26 (Souffy)  by Touchstoneaf
Safe, Chapter 40 (Spuffy)  by Dusty
Married at First Spuffy, Chapter 16 (Spuffy)  by Lavender Bixby
You, Me, and The Zombie (Spuffy)  by Sweetprincipale
[Reviews & Recaps]
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BLOG: Rewatching Angel - Episode 88 by PECKAPALOOZA
BLOG: Rewatching Buffy - Episode 142 by PECKAPALOOZA
PODCAST: Lies My Parents Told Me/Orpheus by mmpodcastnetwork
[Community Announcements]
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We Have a Promo Banner and a Facebook Event by thenewbuzwuzz (Seasonal Spuffy)
[Fandom Discussions]
My Tweets by dontkillspike
Discussion of 5.08 Shadow by Buffy Summers
Discussion of 2.07 "Darla" - Aired 11/14/2000 (WB-US) by VisionGirl
Top Tens #7 by Puppet
Made Some of My Buffy Outfits in AC! by MysteriousRain1
This Scene is Cinematic by TypicalPyschology6
Fun Fact: Michael Bacall, whoo played Eric in Season 2’s Some Assembly Required by djlaw919
Unmatched: Buffy the Vampire Slayer Game by carbonbasedmistake
As You Were Theory by purplemackem
Anyone Here Into Board Games? by QNilsson18
Any "Him" fans? It's one of my favorite standalone eps, Reminds me of the first two seasons by jdpm1991
That time Harmony tried to be a badass and ended up just giving Marcus Hamtilon a neck massage. Bless her by Willdon231
Most Badass Beat down of a Character from Angel? by Willdon231
Nikki Wood - Slaying While Pregnant? by chicklet3123
Sad fact that always pissed me off by Proud3GnAthst
Channel 4 was airing Buffy, so we’re rewatching it. by misiorella
Most Satisfying Badass Beatdown from Buffy by Willdon231
Who would win in a magical duo? Nancy from The Craft or Dark Willow from Buffy by jdpm1991
Why did Buffy never question how or why Ford knew she was the slayer? by sup3rnin10dochalm3frs
Most Underrated Comedic Moment by The810kid
Episodes to Watch With Friends for Nostalgia Reasons? by Laurelas
Spoilers for Season 4 by nerdcrazykid
Season 4 Finale/ S5E1 Spoilers Ahead by nerdcrazykid
Does anyone have a source for this? by obsidianamira
Where does the Watchers Council get their money? by mattwallace314
Intentionally unpopular Buffy opinion: all the supposedly great writing in Season 5-6 is a show that’s lost its plot. by adidoh
Give me some good Spike/Buffy Fanfictions to Read by ABhiMary00
Do I absolutely have to watch Angel? by Coal-Mine-Supervisor
Jonathan’s blood not opening the seal? by Wooden_Storm9102
Starts Beatboxing by ibarleyposthere
Buffy working at the Doublemeat Palace was a low by KevTravels
I knew Eve Looked Familiar!! by lemiller96
I kinda like how Oz and Cordy helped with the Scoobies when they cared and didn't when they were too busy by KevTravels
Crossover Buffy tshirt by PecanSama
Whoever writes the crossword must really Like Buffy! by APlacetooFarAway
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ettadunham · 5 years ago
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A Buffy rewatch 7x17 Lies My Parents Told Me
aka robin wood was done dirty
We did it, guys! We made it to the last season! Also, hello if you’re new, and stumbled upon this without context. As usual, these impromptu text posts are the product of my fevered mind as I rant about the episode I just watched for an hour (okay, sometimes perhaps two). Anything goes!
And today’s episode makes me mad. So you know what, this time we’re skipping all the character analysis and processing, and go straight to the rant.
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I feel like I start a lot of Spike-centric episode posts with disclaimers about my biases, and how I don’t connect to Spike, but have my own blind spots for characters with questionable life choices, etc… But with Lies My Parents Told Me, I’m just gonna get real with you guys here.
F#!* Spike.
That’s it. That’s the whole post. Bye.
Okay, fine. Let’s actually talk a bit about how Robin Wood is getting screwed by the narrative, that puts disproportionate focus on Spike’s perspective regarding the murder of Robin’s mom.
This is mainly what I’m talking about here of course:
SPIKE:  “I don't give a piss about your mum. She was a slayer. I was a vampire. That's the way the game is played.” ROBIN:  “Game?” SPIKE:  “She knew what she was signing up for.”
No, she didn’t??? Slayers are chosen. Yes, they do also make a choice by accepting that duty, but it’s a shitty situation either way. You either accept this whole destiny shtick and that you’re probably gonna die young… Or you ignore it, knowing full well that only you have the power in the world to save all those people… and probably still die young, because you’re a Slayer, and some f#!*boy vampire is gonna hunt you down anyway, even when you are actually trying to keep a low-ish profile.
Which is what we see in the first flashback of the episode?? Spike literally remarks upon how hard it was to find Nikki. She didn’t fully give up on her Slayer duties, sure, but he’s literally the one chasing her down. And then he has the f #!*ing gall to tell Robin that ‘oh yeah, it’s just part of the natural order of things that I murdered your mom, I’m not even sorry’.
F #!*ing Spike.
This isn’t some circle of life bullshit. Being a vampire isn’t the same as being an animal who’s just trying to survive. Vampires are predatory rape metaphors, and Slayers are protectors, trying to save us from them.
I get that this line of thinking is expected of Spike’s character, and self-reflection isn’t his thing, but I hate that we’re essentially just validating his point of view. The past is the past, even if someone is still being affected by your actions. If you decide it doesn’t matter, it just doesn’t. That’s the Spike way of looking at things, and no one is challenging him on it.
And I get Buffy’s perspective here, okay. I’ve already talked about this regarding Willow’s treatment (yes, again, I have biases, I know). Buffy isn’t about punishment. She doesn’t care for vengeance. She’s all about growth, and being better and the mission. So of course she isn’t gonna side with Robin on this.
But this line is going a bit too far:
BUFFY:  “You try anything again, he'll kill you. More importantly, I'll let him.”
Really, Buffy? Really? I’ve gotta believe that this line is mostly just there to scare Robin off of trying to kill Spike again, because otherwise… Oh boy. And even then... why? Why is this line there? Why would we ever led to believe that Buffy would let Spike kill Robin? That’s fucked up and extremely off brand for Buffy in particular.
And Spike’s whole speech to Robin at the end about how now he realizes that his mom loved him, and tearing into Robin about how his mom clearly didn’t love him enough, because she wouldn’t put Robin before her job? F #!* that. F#!* that so much.
F #!* you, Spike.
Have you ever thought about how maybe Nikki was trying to save and protect the rest of humanity from f #!*boy vampires like you, so her son would live in a better world? Or would that require too much self-reflection of you?
Ugh.
And the weird thing is, I still like this episode. A lot. But I’m also mad.
Robin Wood deserved better. And that is all.
(Please don’t @ me, just let me get this out of my system. Thanks for understanding.)
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MTVS Epic Rewatch #202
BTVS 7x17 Lies My Parents Told Me
Obligatory Soundtrack
Stray thoughts
1)  Tbh, instead of the Spike or the Ripper spin-off, THIS is the spin-off the Buffyverse needs and deserves…
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We don’t get to see much of Nikki Wood but the little we do, I love. She definitely has Buffy’s sass, spunk, and punning powers. And she can kick ass!! I just think it’s such a wonderful premise to have a black slayer fighting demons in the backdrop of 1970s New York.
It’s also neat to see the interactions between Nikki and Spike and how they mirror Spike’s relationship with Buffy in the early seasons – Spike chasing after her in what looks like foreplay to him while the Slayer only feels hatred and disgust towards him yet they’re still pitted against each other as worthy opponents.
2) I truly feel for Robin in this scene, though.
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I mean, getting his ass saved by his mother’s murderer must be very conflicting, to say the least.
3) This is such a sad yet truthful statement…
Hey, any apocalypse I avert without dying? Yeah, those are the easy ones.
4) Oh, Giles, don’t you ever go changing…
BUFFY Maybe you're right. Maybe everything is fine.
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BUFFY Giles, what's wrong?
GILES Have you seen the new library? There's nothing but computers. There's not a book to be seen. I—I don't know where to begin, Buffy. I mean, who do we speak to?
I just love that amidst all the chaos and end-of-the-world-ness, he’s worried about the school not having a library.
5) I think this scene was kind of meta, don’t you?
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6)
SPIKE Oh, bollocks. With all the rubbish people keep sticking in my head, it's a wonder that there's room for my brain.
GILES I don't think it takes up that much space, do you?
BURNNNNNN!!!
7) The CGI, though, it’s so cringey, looks like they did that with MSPaint.
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8) Oh, and the cringefest continues, yikes…
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I mean, where do I start? First, there’s the poem…
Yet her smell, it doth linger, painting pictures in my mind. Her eyes, balls of honey. Angel's harps her laugh. Oh, lark. Grant a sign if crook'd be Cupid's shaft. Hark, the lark, her name it hath spake. "Cecily" it discharges from twixt its wee beak.
I mean, it’s not necessarily bad, but it’s not… good. “Balls of honey”? Really, William? Really?
Then, there’s the fact that he’s obviously obsessed with Cecily and writing what apparently amounts to be a creepy amount of poems about her with HER ACTUAL NAME in them, and then he goes, “Hmmmm, Who is't is this cecily thee speaketh of? I knoweth not whom thee couldst possibly beest talking about. I has't nev'r hath heard such a name. Cecily, thee sayeth?”
And then there’s this, which is almost as cringey and disturbing as what comes later on between these two…
WOMAN She's lovely. You shouldn't be alone. You need a woman in your life.
WILLIAM I have a woman in my life.
WOMAN But you ne… Oh...
She’s like blushing? They’re flirting? I just…
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9) I get everyone freaking out about Spike’s trigger being activated, but the truth is, the trigger seemed to be dormant until they went messing with his head. What I don’t get is Spike wanting them to unchain him, though. It doesn’t make much sense when he had chained himself before and even asked Buffy to off him a couple of times. Why would he want to be free now that he knows he could still hurt people? I understand they were building up the conflict between Buffy/Spike vs Giles/Robin by having him ask to be released and having Buffy agree with him WHEN IT’S OBVIOUS HE SHOULD BE CHAINED UNTIL THEY FIGURE IT OUT AND IT’S COMPLETELY OOC FOR BOTH HIM AND BUFFY TO ARGUE OTHERWISE.
10) I fucking love Drusilla’s reaction here…
WILLIAM We'll ravage this city together, my pet. Lay waste to all of Europe. The three of us will teach those snobs and elitists with their falderal just what—
DRUSILLA Three?
WILLIAM You, me, and mother. 
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11) And then he goes and does the most sexual thing a vampire can do with a human BUT he’s surprised when that other thing happens? I’m sorry, but your relationship with your mom was weird way before she made a move on you…
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12) I truly don’t get why they can’t read into The First’s actions and realize that it was manipulating them into doing exactly what they were planning to do. It’s so obvious to me, and I expected more from Giles, tbh. I can understand Robin because he had a personal vendetta against Spike and that’s obviously more important to him than the grand scheme of things. But Giles?
ROBIN Mr. Giles... You got a moment?
GILES What's on your mind?
ROBIN The same thing that's on yours. We got ourselves a problem.
GILES Spike.
ROBIN Yeah, if that trigger is still working, then the First must be waiting for just the right time to use it against us.
GILES It does seem doubtful the First simply forgot it had such a powerful weapon.
ROBIN Yeah, a while back, it slipped up. It told Andrew it wasn't time yet for Spike. So, whatever the First's ultimate plan is, it's obvious that Spike must play an integral part in that. Something needs to be done.
GILES Buffy would never allow it
Robin conveniently leaves out the fact that The First contacted him personally and divulged the fact that Spike had killed his mother. It truly doesn’t get more obvious than that! And I understand why Robin wouldn’t care. It was selfish but totally understandable.
On the other hand, Giles’s stance is rather disappointing. Not only because he fails to read between the lines but also because he’s clearly underestimating Buffy’s ability to make the tough calls when push comes to shove. Buffy had always proven that she has what it takes to make sacrifices for the greater good, even if that means dying or killing someone she loves. And at the same time, we know that she finds strength in her emotions and her love for others. So it’s kind of bewildering that Giles doubts her at this point.
There’s also the hypocrisy of him washing his hands clean off her when she needed him the most and was actively asking for his help but trying to dictate her actions and decisions now by deceiving her. I think that’s what gets me angry, really. It’s not his trying to off Spike, as daft a move that was. It’s his lying to her and deceiving her in order to do something he knew she wouldn’t agree to.
13) So, this is for the greater good, Robin? Hmmm…. 
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It looks more like you’re trying to fulfill your revenge fantasy. Or maybe he had a weird crosses fetish?
14) I mean…
ROBIN No, I don't wanna kill you, Spike. I wanna kill the monster who took my mother away from me.
Technically, he could never kill the monster who killed his mother. To begin with, Spike has a soul now and by the show’s standards, he wasn’t the same person who’d killed Nikki. This is the reason why Robin chooses to use the trigger. But the monster that shows up when Spike’s trigger goes off is not the person who’d killed Nikki either. When Spike’s under the influence of the trigger he seems to be a much more primal, instinct-driven, lethal vampire, which is not the pre-soul Spike we’ve known.
15) I really like how the fight is juxtaposed with the scene between Spike and his mom. It’s a really nice way to show how he gets to accept and overcome the burden that makes the trigger work. You can see that he’s beaten not because of Robin’s punches but because of what he’s remembering.
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I mean, who wouldn’t be traumatized…?
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16) I kind of see some of the points both of them make during their final conversation. Spike, as usual, makes some very good observations as regards Robin and his vendetta against him in the sense that he’s trying to put the blame on Spike for getting robbed of his childhood when that’s not really the case. While it’s not true that Nikki “knew what she was signing up for” because being a Slayer is not a career choice or even a calling, she did choose to put her duties as a Slayer before her personal and family life, which is why she ended up getting killed. I think it would be interesting to see how she got that mentality. I can imagine her arriving at the conclusion that she had the chance to make the world a better place for her kid, which makes a lot of sense in my opinion. I can’t help but see her “the mission is what matters” statement as influenced by the Black Power movement, too. The thing is, the fact that Robin grew up without a mom was the result of a number of reasons. That doesn’t take away from the fact that Spike was, indeed, his mom’s murderer, but it feels like Robin was trying to channel his anger into Spike because he couldn’t deal with the fact that he resented his mother for not choosing him over her job. On some level, he must’ve blamed his mother, too. It’s just a very complex issue, and I don’t think Robin would’ve gotten over the whole thing just by killing Spike.
17) I’m not a fan of the resolution, though. The fact that Spike overcomes his trauma by pissing all over Robin’s in the most brutal way feels so wrong and unnecessary, and I don’t understand why the writers made that choice and expected the viewers to see Spike as the hero in that scenario. Of course, I didn’t want him to get killed and I do like how he got rid of the trigger – by being forced to confront what he probably deems his most horrible deed and understanding that what matters about his relationship with his mom is not its ending but everything that came before. But I don’t get why he had to be so brutal with Robin in order to do that? Telling him that his mom didn’t love him and all that? Like, these are all things Robin probably thought himself a million times before, but having someone else spit them out in your face – your mom’s murderer of all people – feels like the ultimate humiliation and I don’t appreciate the writers building up Spike as a “strong/badass” character again by trashing Robin in such a horrible way. I can’t imagine how anyone would cheer for Spike here? It feels wrong to do so.
18) This is the moment you choose to bring this up, Giles? Why wasn’t this an issue before? Why didn’t you question this before?
GILES You want Spike here even after what he's done to you in the past?
It’s such a douche move to bring this up when it suits your purposes instead of showing concern about this because, I don’t know, you’re worried about Buffy reconnecting with her attempted rapist?
19)
BUFFY I'm in the fight of my life.
VAMPIRE Really?
BUFFY Not you, Richard.
“Not you, Richard” is going to be my new “Take it easy, Joan.” I’m calling it. 
20) I just love how the second Buffy realizes that Giles has been stalling her, she slays the vamp without even looking. It probably was harder for her to not kill him.
21) This also rubs me the wrong way…
BUFFY You try anything again, he'll kill you. More importantly, I'll let him. I have a mission to win this war, to save the world. I don't have time for vendettas. The mission is what matters.
I get that she strongly believes Spike is a warrior they need in this fight, but that doesn’t mean that she shouldn’t stop him from killing Robin, someone who’s also an asset – vendetta or not - but more importantly, an innocent person. This is so unusually cold of Buffy, and I don’t like it at all.
22) I don’t know why Giles assumed that Robin would succeed in killing Spike? If he’d been smart and sneaky about it, of course, but Robin was more concerned about his vendetta and putting on a big show, he was probably the least qualified person to try and kill Spike because of how emotionally involved he was in the whole thing. It’s precisely because of his emotions that he didn’t succeed. And besides, fighter or not, he didn’t stand a chance against William the Bloody, which is the one he wanted to fight. Giles was kind of stupid, tbh. Like, he trusted this guy who he barely even knew with a very important task, one that would cost him his relationship with Buffy. And he didn’t even bother to make sure that Robin would do it in a foolproof way.
23) See the hypocrisy?
BUFFY He's alive. Spike's alive. Wood failed.
GILES Well, that doesn't change anything. What I told you is still true. You need to learn—
24) This is Buffy’s kiss of death, tbh, and I fucking love it, it’s so extra.
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25) I’m kind of torn when it comes to this episode. I feel like it’s a solid episode in the sense that it explores both Robin’s and Spike’s issues with their mothers and Buffy’s relationship with her mentor/father figure. On the other hand, this is an episode that centers around three of my favorite characters in the show – Buffy, Spike, and Giles – and I can’t say that I like any of them in it. I can handle not liking one of them at once, but shaking my head at all of them simultaneously is too much for my poor fangirl heart, you know? I don’t know. They come across as idiotic, brutal, and cold, and it makes me feel uncomfortable. I love these characters, and watching them act so unlike themselves for the sake of the plot… I just get this uncomfortable feeling I can’t shake off. I feel... like second-hand wrongness or something.
26) If you’ve got this far, thank you for reading! If you enjoy my recaps and my blog, please consider supporting it on ko-fi. Thanks!
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