#rewatched 6×20 month ago and it still haunts me

[microwavebeeep]

I know, what I'm doing

[feelingofcontent]

DNP Rewatch: Answering SPICY questions I would usually avoid!

Date video was published: 04/30/2021 (X)

DNP Main Channel Rewatch: 439

A sequel to the first one of these just a few months before...not complaining though, both of them are great videos. There was another month between videos on Phil’s channel, but it was still filled with Stereo content until they announced the end of that on April 15. But then weekly videos for 3 weeks starting with this! He had asked for questions in earlier April.

0:00 - his quiff was getting so long again at this point! also I love him going for “spicy” specifically in this

0:13 - I don’t want to read into that actually

0:22 - “from the juice” did not make that better

0:28 - I’m sure he just got this question as a joke a bunch after the last one

0:32 - another question I’m surprised he went for, even if he did start with a joke answer

0:42 - ten years is quite a long time

0:59 - this is very specific. and somehow very interesting even though there is really nothing we can tell from it. he doesn’t have DMs that often...the fifth one is from back in November 2020

1:22 - I agree with him on that

1:27 - “let me find a sharpie” struck fear into my heart...

1:31 - you can tell he did this at the end and then cut it in, because the lava lamp is fully bubbling during this clip when it wasn’t before or after

1:47 - I mean...it looks okay actually

1:56 - that car insurance commercial will haunt him forever

2:12 - “don’t sell your soul to the devil...unless he’s hot” 😂

2:17 - a “kind of” boyfriend. so, someone he just hooked up with, right. he just doesn’t want to say it like that

2:23 - his little laugh and side eye there. I wonder if his parents still watch all his videos, although at this point they must be immune to him saying just about anything

2:43 - Phil once again immediately in love with any hot guy that spoke to him during uni

3:03 - yikes. I’m sure Phil felt so bad when he realized 

3:20 - oh, sad 🙁

3:37 - bleeping himself out there!

3:44 - I feel this. my family is the same. I once accidentally dropped a “fuck” in front of my dad and I don’t know which of us was more shocked

3:56 - sure...let’s just ignore that a few questions ago he was talking about a hook-up asking him to write their name on his dick... 😂

3:59 - of course it did

4:04 - I didn’t know I needed Phil just shouting “tit” into the air until this moment, but I’m so glad we have it forever

4:13 - they were so excited about getting into the new house 🥺

4:30 - Phil clarifying in the text there that Martyn is his brother, in case people don’t know

4:43 - sibling fights getting violent there

4:51 - Phil coming up with a “cool” name to use is always interesting

5:11 - “we hung out a lot” alrighty then 👀

5:18 - awww, poor Phil

5:31 - I love this so much. those were good friends

5:59 - Phil thinking of something funny to do and then laughing at himself for it is great

6:14 - every time they mention the Japan trip I want to weep 😭 they are so soft about it

6:28 - good Phil annotation there

6:37 - that art is so cute!

6:51 - and something cursed, of course

7:04 - Phil really likes to reference that accidental “ASs” tweet

7:09 - this discussion on Stereo was hysterical

7:25 - getting very real there. DNP had to deal with a lot of that and people just using them for views

7:41 - he was proud of himself for that line! it’s a good one

8:02 - honest-Phil. he has a great face

8:14 - he had just made that photo (with Dan cropped out 😂) his icon in several places shortly before this. Dan apparently hated it though

8:26 - that clarification of who Martyn is earlier...no clarification at all of who Dan is

8:33 - the leather shirt in 2013...Dan didn’t like Phil’s look either, to be fair

8:44 - laughing at the idea of Phil just throwing it away at some point without telling Dan

8:47 - wonder if this gave him the idea for Viewers ROAST my outfits!

8:50 - a continuation of the joke from the end of the last questions video

More enjoyable and personal Phil content! So many great videos from early 2021.

For Easter, they were still in lockdown although Kath sent treats. Dan was also busy recording the audiobook for YWGTTN at the end of March and through April. The new house was also making more progress by mid-April, but was not “ready-for-move-in” yet (1, 2). I also wonder if Phil’s dizziness issue was starting around this time; he was already having scans for it by mid-May.

[lilydalexf]

Old School X is a project interviewing X-Files fanfic authors who were posting fic during the original run of the show. New interviews are posted every Tuesday.

Interview with Elizabeth Rowandale

Elizabeth Rowandale has 16 stories at Gossamer spanning from 1995 to 2012, plus she has more at AO3 (other fandoms too). She's been giftng the fandom with stories for a long time! I've talked about some of my favorites of her stories before, including Hallways and Water's Edge. Big thanks to Elizabeth for doing this interview.

Does it surprise you that people are still interested in reading your X-Files fanfics and others that were posted during the original run of the show (1993-2002)?

Yes and no.  When I find myself suddenly caught up in a fandom that has already lived its glory days (which happens a lot, I'm habitually late to the party), I am always ravenous for fic written during the original run - it always has a different perspective and voice and it's like a little bit of the experience captured in time -- so I can understand how others would be interested in my past.  That said, some of my early stuff is pretty awful. LOL.  I have left it online for two reasons: 1. Nostalgia, 2. I know there are some fics I've read in my life that may not have been the best written in a literary sense, but just had something magical about them that fed exactly what I needed.  And I would hate it if the author took down that work and I could never find it again (which has happened).  So I try to respect that same sentiment should it appear in one of my readers.  I'd say by about 6th or 7th season of the original run, my work became presentable. :)  My largest X-Files work ("Water's Edge") was begun during the original run and completed about a year after the show ended.  That one I definitely still claim as my work, even though there's certainly stuff I would fix if I were writing it now.

What do you think of when you think about your X-Files fandom experience? What did you take away from it?

So many things!  Let's start with my husband. :D  I met the love of my life on the X-Files newsgroup in spring of 1995.  We were married a year later, and we are still married 24 years later and have a 20 year old daughter.  One of the most important friendships of my life came from being part of this fandom - she began as an "Edgehead" during the original posting of "Water's Edge". The fandom brought me my family, friends, and made me believe in myself as a writer and, in some ways, as a person worth being friends with, for the first time in my life.  It's kind of crazy, really, how different my life would be without it.  The experience was not without its flaws.  There was a lot of judgementalism, a lot of cliquishness, a lot of snobbery.  I was condemned almost as much as I was welcomed.  But in the end it was all worth the life experience.

As far as the fic itself, X-Files was my first real experience with fanfic, and it thoroughly spoiled me for all other fandoms forever, because the sheer VOLUME of professional quality work being put out there was mind-boggling.  I expected all fandoms to be like this, and the fact is this is extremely rare and precious.  I think I could read X-Files fic for the rest of my life and never run out of pieces worth reading.

Social media didn't really exist during the show's original run. How were you most involved with the X-Files online (atxc, message board, email mailing list, etc.)?

I started out primarily on a.t.x.c..  Then progressed to mailing lists (especially Scullyfic/E-muse!), and later was very involved on The Haven.  The Haven was quite a magical experience.

What did you take away from your experience with X-Files fic or with the fandom in general?

I think I answered this by over-babbling on the question above. :D  But ultimately, I think I would have to say my belief in literature as a tool to connect people on an intimate level that almost nothing else can.  To give people a brief moment of sharing their precious internal worlds and inviting someone else to step into it with them.

What was it that got you hooked on the X-Files as a show?

Really, it was inevitable.  It has all the classic tropes that have always spoken to me - Supernatural horror, law enforcement partners, partner UST, misfits as heroes, haunting soundtrack.  But amusingly enough, my first impression of it was negative.  My mother and I had been religiously watching "Sightings", a FOX reality show (before "reality shows" were a thing) on the supernatural.  Then that got cancelled and they replaced it with some show that was about fictionalized encounters with and investigations of the paranormal.  And we were like WTF we don't want that, we want real investigations and evidence!  So I didn't watch it out of protest. :D  Then one night I stumbled upon it when I had nothing to do and watched "Lazarus".  I thought the show was okay, but that I could never really get invested in it because there was no real chemistry between Mulder and Scully (yes, you can laugh me out of the room now :D).  But the thing is, you can't FIND the significant moments in that episode unless you're already embroiled in their world.  Like when Mulder calls her "Dana" on the phone and we all know he's panicking big time -- this was my first episode, so I assumed he always called her Dana, no big.  Some time passed, then I saw Conduit.  And Tooms.  And I started to get really sucked in.  Then I saw Genderbender.  Now, if you know me at all, you know since I was about 6 years old, my life has revolved around my current muse.  I get obsessed with a certain actress/performer/character, and that becomes my lens for the whole world (yes, at 6 it was Lynda Carter as Diana Prince).  I have always moved from one Muse to the next, and the few times I've been without a focus person I'm very untethered and unproductive.  So, I'd been in one of my longest dry spells following my Madonna and Vivien Leigh obsessions, mostly focusing on reading Dean Koontz books, when X-Files came along.  And this obsession was unique in that I can actually pinpoint the moment I fell.  I was sitting in my bedroom watching Genderbender, and they were outside the general store and Scully had just been touched by Brother Andrew and was a little tripped out and staring after the horse and cart when Mulder stepped up to see if she was okay, and...I actually felt myself falling for Gillian Anderson.  And there was this moment of both elation and bittersweetness, because I knew how all-consuming my obsessions could be and the emotional rollercoaster they could entail (especially when I was younger, I'm a little better armored now :)).  But I have no control over when and where they hit.  But I knew by the end of that episode that I was off on another wild ride of the muse. :)

So, the short answer is -- Gillian Anderson. :D

What got you involved with X-Files fanfic?

Truthfully, I can't experience anything without writing fanfic in my head.  I've been doing it in one form or another my whole life, I just didn't know until the X-Files (and the internet) how many other people were like me!!  I started writing X-Files fic before I was even online.  In fact, The X-Files was the reason I got my first internet service - because the fandom was moving online and I didn't want to miss out.  I read my first fanfic in the Unofficial X-Files Fanclub monthly zine and it fascinated me.  I wrote my first X-Files fic, a first season story called "Silent Lines", before I had ever been on the internet, and I had it published in that same fanclub newsletter.  (I was already writing original fiction, hoping to make writing my career).  Later, after I had joined the internet XF community, I wrote a post-ep to "Irresistible" that I posted online.  That was my first online fic.  Some time after (and a few more fics down the road) when all the rights to "Silent Lines" had reverted to me, I posted that online as well.

What is your relationship like now to X-Files fandom?

I dabble now and then. :)  When the reboot came about, I came back to the old stomping grounds and reconnected with some of the Old Guard.  I still have a fair amount of pretty Mulder and Scully on my Twitter feed, and I continue to follow all Gillian Anderson's new projects.  But it's not my primary focus at the moment.  (My serial monogamist muse has another lover this year. :))

Were you involved with any fandoms after the X-Files? If so, what was it like compared to X-Files?

Several (Stargate, Sanctuary, Xena, Battlestar Galactica, Once Upon a Time, etc.).  As I mentioned before, almost none of them had anywhere NEAR the quality and quantity of fanfic The X-Files has to offer.  The closest I experienced was the Xena fandom.  There are some AMAZING Uber fics and Conqueror fics, many of which went on to be published as original novels.  Some fandoms were colder and more cruel than The X-Files.  Some were warmer and more generous.  I was most prolific during my years in the Stargate fandom.  I wrote something like 80 fics.  It was crazy.  I don't think I'll ever be that prolific again.

Who are some of your favorite fictional characters? Why?

Just from anything?  From television Dana Scully, Stella Gibson, Laura Roslin, Sharon Raydor, Regina Mills.  I love powerful women with scars.  Kind women at heart who will fight for what they believe in and whom they love.  Mothers - whether in actuality or at heart.  I love women who prove strength and power can be completely synonymous with femininity.

Do you ever still watch The X-Files or think about Mulder and Scully?

A couple of months ago my husband and daughter and I finished a complete X-Files rewatch (original series and movies), taking our daughter through it for the first time.  It was awesome to re-experience it all through her eyes.  She grew up hearing about it, but had never seen more than a handful of episodes (and, sadly, the reboot LOL).

Do you ever still read X-Files fic? Fic in another fandom?

Every now and then I indulge in X-Files fic, yes.  Sometimes new stuff, most often revisiting old favorites.

I definitely read in my current fandoms.  For a few years I didn't, but lately I've been at it again.  Right now my primary muse is Mary McDonnell, so I'm obsessing over her various roles through the years.  Been reading fic for "Major Crimes", "Dances with Wolves", "Battlstar Galactica", "Passion Fish", and "ER" (specifically pertaining to Eleanor Carter).

Do you have any favorite X-Files fanfic stories or authors?

Of course. :)  Mish's "No Quarter Given" will always own my soul. [Lilydale note: It’s a 3-part story: 1, 2, 3.] "Black Hole Season" by Penumbra, "Above Rubies" by Rachel Howard, "Blinded by White Light" by DashaK, "Sounds of Silence" by GirlGone, "Blood Oranges" by Syntax6, "Absolute Zero" and "Never Enough" by August.  So many more.

What is your favorite of your own fics, X-Files and/or otherwise?

From X-Files, I can't really choose between "Water's Edge" which took the most out of me) and "Bridges" (which I wrote just a couple of year ago).   I wrote them from very different places and I am proud of what I accomplished in each case. YMMV.

Do you think you'll ever write another X-Files story? Or dust off and post an oldie that for whatever reason never made it online?

Never say never? :D  I still feel badly that I left the sequel to "Water's Edge", "High Tide", hanging after posting just a few chapters. I never should have started it. My muse jumped ship to another fandom, and there was really nothing I could do.  And I'm such a different person now, I don't know if what I would write now is what people who loved the first book would actually want to hear.  I came back with the reboot and wrote "Bridges" and that largely said everything I needed to say about what happened to Mulder and Scully after "I Want to Believe".  So, realistically, that was probably my XF writing swan song.  But I would never say I won't ever post another fic.  As the saying goes, "It all comes back to the X-Files".  (And, yes, there's PLENTY of half-finished fic on my hard drive. LOL)

Do you still write fic now? Or other creative work?

I do.  Now that my kid is grown, I'm trying to seriously pursue a professional writing career from here forward.  And I do still dabble writing fic in my current fandoms.  Right now there is a Major Crimes fic sitting on my hard drive waiting for me to work up the nerve to post it.;)

Where do you get ideas for stories?

Once I'm inside my POV character's head, the narrative in my brain won't shut up.  I flesh out and what-if everything.  I fill in every moment that doesn't appear on screen.  I talk to myself a lot and live in my head and sometimes scare family members.  I get some sort of orgasmic high from things like seeing Laura Roslin grasp and tuck into her own hair when she's crying while my inner voice screams "OMG IT'S CANON SHE SELF-SOOTHES WITH HER HAIR!!!!!"  I maintain a surprisingly sane outer presentation for the crazy obsessed artist I am within.

What's the story behind your pen name?

When I began removing my real name from the internet (for you young folks, we all started out using our Real Names and building our virtual houses on Geocities, then got warned from everywhere of the scary scary place that is cyberspace and started NEVER EVER using our real names, then Facebook came along and now everyone and their dog is out there with their real names, and Gen X is still going WTF ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!?!??), I simply chose what I found to be a pretty last name (Rowandale).  Elizabeth is my real name.  Along the way, when I had started to feel confined by expectations for my writing based on my reputation, I challenged myself to be more honest in what I wanted to write by using the mental trick of a pen name no one knew was actually me, and invented "Rowan Darkstar" (the darker "edgier" side of Elizabeth Rowandale).  "Rowan" was taken from Rowan Mayfair in Anne Rice's "The Witching Hour", my favorite novel at the time.  Later, I went public with the fact I was Rowan Darkstar, and when I moved into my next fandom, I did so with that as my primary name.  I have written in most of my fandoms as either Rowan Darkstar or LadyRowan with the exception of anything else Gillian Anderson related wherein I carried over the Elizabeth Rowandale since there were many crossover readers from X-Files.

Do your friends and family know about your fic and, if so, what have been their reactions?

Many of them do, yes.  For many years my mother was my primary beta reader!!  Sadly, she now suffers from dementia and can no longer fill that role.  My best friend came into my life through my Stargate and Sanctuary fic, so there's no hiding from her, and she is now my beta.:)  My husband met me in the fandom.  So...yeah, most of my close friends know.:)  In my 'other life' as an Army wife (now retired) and suburban Mom not so much.

Is there a place online (tumblr, twitter, AO3, etc.) where people can find you and/or your stories now?

The most reliable place is probably AO3.  It doesn't have much of my older stuff, but I generally post anything new there.  I'm Rowan_D on Twitter.

Is there anything else you'd like to share with fans of X-Files?

No, you can't be red/green colorblind and be a field agent for the FBI.  No, soul groups don't work that way, Scully would have been his lover in some lifetimes, too.  Yes, someone with Scully's education and deliberate precision of language WOULD say "for whom?" and not "for who?", you are quite right to cringe.  No, you can't drive to Quantico and back to downtown DC and have it still be morning.  And lastly -- The Kansas town after which they modeled "The Rain King" is NOT brown, it is NOT flat, it HAS a regional airport, and the residents are educated and intelligent.  I lived there at the time -- There was a whole layout in the local paper about the crew visiting for "authenticity."  I still marvel at how that is even possible.

(Posted by Lilydale on August 25, 2020)

[thetidewillcome-blog]

I answered one of those things

1. You woke up naked next to the last person you texted, what would you say? I don't know what I'd say but I'd be seriously happy 2. What’s going on between you and the last person you kissed? Absolutely nothing. 3. If your boyfriend or girlfriend was into drugs, would you care? Only if it was problematic, recreational is all good with me 👍🏻 4. Is your last name longer than six letters? Yes 5. Was your last kiss drunk or sober? Hahahahahahahahaha I can't remember the last time I kissed someone sober 6. Have you ever wanted to have someone but you messed it up? Many many times 7. What does your last received text say? "Can’t wait to see this gorgeous girl next week. 💕" (My mum talking about seeing her niece next week) 8. How many times have you kissed the last person you kissed? Once 9. Where was your last kiss at? A shitty bar in Brisbane 10. When is the last time you saw your sister? Don't have a sister 11. What do you drink in the morning? Coffee, fuck loads of coffee 12. Where did you sleep last night? In my bed 13. Do you think relationships are hard? It really depends, they can be or they can be really easy 14. If you could go back and change something in the past 5 months, would you? No, probably not. Maybe would've made more of a move the other, but that's about it 15. You’re locked in a room with the last person you kissed, any problems? It'd probably be a little awkward 16. Would you rather it be sunny or rainy? Rainy, everytime 17. Do you know anyone with the same middle name as you? Nope 18. Are you wearing jeans,sweatpants,or pajama pants? None of the above 19. Do you think you will be in a relationship 3 years from now? I really hope so, I'm sick of this single shit 20. Does anyone like you? I'd like to think so, but most likely not 21. Have you ever kissed someone with a name that starts with an S? Yeah I think so 22. Is the last person you kissed gay? Doubt they would've kissed me if they were 23. Is there a person you CANNOT stand? Oohhh sooo many 24. Have you ever considered getting a tattoo? Already have a couple 25. In the past week have you cried? Nope 26. What breed was the last dog you saw? It was a Labrador and it was beautiful 27. Do you dry off in the shower or out of the shower? Out of the shower 28. Have you ever kissed a football player? I have not 29. Do you think you’re old? No, I don't think I am 30. Do you like text messaging? I do, but I can be really forgetful with replying 31. What type of day are you having? Pretty good day I guess 32. Have you ever thought about getting your nose pierced? So many times 33. Do you prefer warm or cold weather? Cold weather please 34. Is there a person of the opposite sex who means a lot to you? Yeah I have a lot of close female friends 35. Would you prefer a relationship or a fling? Much prefer a relationship thanks 36. Are you a simple or complicated person? I like to think I'm a pretty straight forward person 37. What song are you listening to? Nothing, rewatching episodes of The Office (U.S.) 38. When you say you’re sorry do you mean it? Always 39. Is there a girl that knows everything or almost everything about you? There definitely is 40. What made you start liking the person you like now? I don't we just sort of clicked, and she's such a fantastic person and easy to get along with 41. When did you last receive a text message? Earlier this afternoon 42. What is wrong with you right now? Lonely, always lonely 43. How well do you know the last female you texted? Starting to get to know each other pretty well 44. Does anyone disgust you? There are a few people 45. Would you date someone right now if they asked? If it was the right person 46. Are you in a good mood right now? Fairly good I guess 47. Who was the last person you talked to in person? My father 48. What color shirt are you wearing? Not wearing one, just being a comfortable, lazy shit 👌🏻 49. Has someone recently told you something you didn’t want to hear? Not recently, no 50. Anyone you’re giving up on? Definitely very close 51. Do you hate the person you fell hardest for? I do, with a very strong passion 52. Have you ever thought about giving up on someone but couldn’t? Yep, just one particular person 53. Do you like rain? Love it 54. Do you care if your boyfriend/girlfriend drinks? I'd prefer that they did 55. Have you ever liked somebody and never told them? Many times 56. Do you like to cuddle? Love to cuddle 👍🏻 57. Are you shy? I can be either very shy, or the complete opposite 58. Do you get along with girls? Yeah I have many close female friends 59. Have you dated the person you texted last? I wish 60. What do you carry with you at all times? My phone, wallet, cigarettes 61. If you were paid 1 million dollars to spend the night in a supposed haunted house, would you? Without hesitation 62. Do you think you can last in a relationship for five months? I most definitely can 63. Think back to October, were you in a relationship? I was not 64. The person you like kisses you on the forehead, do you find this cute? I would 100% 65. Did anything “cute” happen in the last week? Yeah there were a couple of moments the other night 66. How old are the last three people you kissed? I would love to be able to answer that, but who knows 67. Would you rather pay to get your nails done or do them yourself? Neither? 68. Which do you like better- Zebra print or leopard print? Zebra print I guess, but preferably neither 69. Do you have any stickers on your car? Yeah, just one for my footy club 70. Would you rather listen to Luke Bryan or Lil Wayne? I don't know who Luke Bryan is, but I definitely don't want to listen to Lil Wayne, so... 71. Blackberry, Anroid, or iPhone? iPhone 72. When’s the last time you had pizza from Pizza Hut? Maybe like 18 months ago 73. Do you like diet soda? Not really 74. What color are the walls in your room? Plain old white 75. Are you 16 or older? Indeed 76. Do you watch Pretty Little Liars? I don't 77. Do you have a job? I wish, but I study full time 78. What are your initials? J D P 79. Did you ever have braces? Never 80. Are you from the south? The south of where? I mean Australia is pretty south. 81. What does your last status on facebook say? "The earth is flat. The truth is out there." (Part of a drinking game haha) 82. Do you still talk to the first person you ever kissed? I do not, haven't spoken to them in ages 83. Are you closer to your mom or your dad? Ummm both about the same, but probably mum I guess 84. Have you ever done cheerleading or gymnastics? Nope 85. What’s the last movie you saw in theaters? Black Panther (fkn good movie) 86. Do you smoke? I do, kind of trying to quit though 87. Would you rather wear heels or flip flops? Flip flops pls (also they're called thongs not flip flops) 88. Is your phone touch screen? Yes it is 89. Do you normally wear your hair straight or curly? I don't get much of an option there 90. Have you ever snuck out of your house? On many occasions 91. Would you rather swim in a river, lake, or pool? Lakes are pretty cool 92. Have you ever made out in a car? Yep 93. …Had sex in a car? I have 94. Are you single or in a relationship? Unfortunately single 95. What were you doing last night at midnight? Sleeping 96. When’s the last time you saw fireworks? New Years Eve 97. Do you like the camera on your phone? Yeah it's pretty decent 98. Have you ever had a friend with benefits? I have 99. Have you ever passed out from drinking? A fair few times 100. Are you friends with people on facebook that you actually hate? One or two, yeah 101. Have you ever had a pregnancy scare? Nope 102. Name your favorite Kesha song: Don't have one 🙅🏻‍♂️ 103. Do you have any tan lines right now? Not really 104. Would you ever wear cowboy boots with shorts? Hahahahaha not seriously