#restore me discussion
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part of the process of learning to take responsibility for your actions is learning what things you can't take responsibility for. not just to protect you (e.g., from your own feelings of guilt; from people taking advantage of your willingness to take responsibility by attributing blame to you unfairly), but because to take responsibility is not just to say "it was my fault and i'm sorry" but to actually do things (to make amends and to mitigate and prevent future harm), and if you don't understand what to take responsibility for, you aren't going to understand how to take responsibility.
there is a lot that's outside of your control. people put a lot of emphasis on forgiveness in a way that i think is missing the point. being forgiven is not my priority. my priority is that i am doing what it is in my power to do. i can't control how that's received. i'd like it to be received well; i'm doing what i'm doing because i want to repair harm that i have caused to another person, so it matters to me if what i'm doing is actually achieving that goal or not. but there's only so much that i can do to achieve that goal, and if i'm doing it, and the harm is not repaired, that's okay. that's beyond my control. i have to make my peace with the fact that i've caused harm to another person that is not resolved, because i'm doing what i can and i have to continue living on this earth, and in continuing to live i'm going to be living with the fact of that unresolved harm. the most important thing at that point is for me to use my knowledge of the specific ways in which my actions harmed that person to change my behavior going forward to avoid causing that harm again, to the extent that that's within my power.
it doesn't do anyone - you or the people you have harmed - any good for you to assign responsibility to yourself for things that you can't control. if you're going to attempt the active work of repair and change you have to first identify what it's possible to repair and change. you can't actually repair a relationship all by yourself! you can only change your own behavior. you can only offer amends to the other person that they may or may not find sufficient. not to go all serenity prayer on you but guilt for the sake of guilt just makes you feel way more powerful than you actually are (because you think that everything happened because of you) and at the same time completely incapable of exercising your power (because you don't understand what your power actually is). to effect change you have to focus on the things you can actually change. focusing on the things you can't change is a problem not just because it's taking your focus away from the things you can change, but because it means you don't actually understand the sphere of your own influence. you're operating under what is essentially a self-centered worldview in which you could make everything better, you could prevent all harm, if only you were trying harder, if only you were a better person. who does that serve? it doesn't reflect reality. it makes you hate yourself and feel sorry for yourself at the same time, and it doesn't actually improve things for the people you harmed. it doesn't help keep you from harming people in the future, because you don't understand the territory and the limits of the causal relationship between your actions and other people's reactions to them.
you can only do what you can do. what you can't do, you can't do, and you can't take responsibility for doing, either in the past or present. after you realize that there is harm to repair the next step in the process of repair is to ask yourself what your responsibility is for the past and what your agency is going forward. everything else will follow from that. you simply cannot skip that step.
#this is so hard to think about and talk about because it's so nebulous. it's comforting to have some hard and fast rule instead#'take responsibility for the harm you have caused' sounds good but what does it actually mean?#you are responsible for your harmful actions. you can't be responsible for the actual feelings of other people#it obfuscates what you can actually do. which makes you think that you are both all-powerful and#powerless to make amends or change#but adding any nuance to the discussion just sounds like apologism. and could easily be used by bad actors (e.g. abusers)#to justify their completely insincere attempts to apologize and change#accountability#responsibility#restorative justice#guilt#learning and growing#apology#forgiveness#wow i have a lot of tags relevant to this haha#my posts#you can tell i gave up on sleeping and got out of bed because of the absence of typos which means i have my glasses on#fare thee well to my theoretical night of restful sleep. hello day before me that i have to navigate on three hours of sleep and#terrible head neck and shoulder pain :/
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i maintain that restoration did grif dirty by making his character so aggressively angry BUT i do think it makes somewhat more sense in the context of shisno, because we know grif wants to leave but shisno is where we really get to see how tired he is.
#like yeah you can retcon a whole trilogy but did you consider how it would haunt the narrative#i get its not mainline canon but there is so much character development (mixed bag imo but thats for another discussion) in 15-17 that#does/could inform restoration but if you dont watch it you dont get that#so its just weird to me to be like. well ignore that. but also remember it.#theta thoughts#rvb#rvb meta#reddin and bluein
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i've reached the point in my librarian career where patrons decide to give me gifts after helping them 😭💜
#one lady stopped me at the grocery store once and gave me chocolate T_T#this old man (who's met me only once) came to my library the other day and said that he'd love to gift me some of his books#our first meeting we discussed books and poetry and we have the same taste in literature and he was so excited to talk to someone about it😭#these types of people restore my faith in humanity istg :')#libraries#library things
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Which game armour do yall think fits certain characters best...
#reach fits caboose rlly well 2 me#infinite is alright too#grimmons and tex rock Halo 3 imo#sarge w H2#Donut in H5#Church looks awesome in Halo 4#(thinking specifically of the trophy room/restoration trailer scenes)#i rlly cant decide on tucker tbr#rvb#red vs blue#rooster teeth#discussion
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Pages 257-263 of Tahereh Mafi’s “Restore me” is exactly what the hell I signed up for when I got into the shatter me fandom!!! Warnette will be the death of me. I love this series so much I’m crying. 
#bookblr#shatter me series#restore me#good god the smut in this book is just as good as believe me#I absolutely love it!#i’m also a little obsessed with Warner#but we don’t need to discuss that *giggles*
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oohoh my god ok i went trick or treating with my buddies and my bestie surprised me with a costume that MATCHED MINE!!!!!! we were little european peasant boys together
#ramblies#THEY EVEN ADDED THE SOOT ON THEIR FACE LIKE I DID#WE DID NOT DISCUSS THIS BEFOREHAND#I WAS SO EXCITED#because a) i was secretly hoping i wouldnt be the only little peasant boy b) they werent telling me their costume and i was excited to see#c) i felt Seen and like my costume was Funny Enough To Go Along With#anyways i had a pretty good night. i wish it was warmer out though (hopefully next year it will be)#i never did matching costumes with anyone before....... it was quite sweet. childhood restored
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Ok this is so random but just a thought... how can "he's liying about letting you drink his blood" be an argument IF you can literally bite him in game (and I did it so much times just. for funsies!!) and he literally has NO reaction? no lines? nothing? he's just standing there and says nothing- just. stands????
#it's just funny to me#it's probably overthought though- or maybe not. maybe they just forgot to add something in game lmao#I'm not trying to start a discussion or anything it's just funny to me because you can quite literally. bite him#????#also from previous playthrough. everett and astarion were both bloodless and happy at the same time 😭😭 it was the funniest fucking thing??#I used lesser restoration on astarion though because HE CAN'T LOCKPICK. it's just. funny#nonsims#delete later#olya's rambles
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#life be giving me whiplash lately lmao#my banana boat is down again - an oil leak that shorted my starter 🙃#stressful time of year because we're coming up on both dads birthday and one year since his passing just a few weeks later#but I also finally bit the bullet and fessed up to the dude ive had feelings for for a while now#totally set myself up for disappointment because thats just been what lifes been handing me for the last year and a half or so#but it actually went really fuckin' well#he was essentially in the same boat as me#definitely FEELING something but valuing the friendship so much that it crippled us both#we've both helped one another grow so much over the last year or so and sort of restored a bit of one anothwrs' faith in humanity#didnt wanna risk fuckin' that up#plus he just assumed I wouldn't feel that way#but yeah it went really well and I'm REALLY proud of myself for taking that leap of faith 🥹#i told him I'm not expecting anything right out the gates#mostly just trying to open that dialog with him and to spend more time together#see where things go#met up in person to talk about it a bit today and be brought me a fuckin' bouquet 🥺😭#this is some straight up 'mutual pining but they're idiots' shit 😂#but its cute and im glad it ended up the way it did 💚#AND I've already had the asexuality discussion with him so he knows and is entirely cool with it 🥹💚#actually had that talk before feelings evem came into the equation
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#i'm not defending trump#i'm just saying#you can't talk about prison abolition and restorative justice and at the same time keep harking about him being 'a convicted felon!!!!'#he's bad because he's racist. sexist. authoritarian. fascist. a fraud. i'll even allow traitor#(even if 'treason' is going to be a fun new label to be attached to leftist activism under his presidency if it isn't already)#but you chose to go with 'convicted felon'?#that label is only relevant in the discussion that a convicted felon being able to be *elected* should mean felons also get to *vote*#anyway#doesn't concern me actually#there's just a very interesting dissonace on sone social justice blogs sometimes#to delete later
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ancient dragon man with the faith/arcane build is fun. I’m him but better
#dragonmaw ? cute#flame grant me strength + golden vow + greyoll’s roar + dragonmaw#you have much to learn young one#plum plays elden ring: faith restored - shadow missionary#ok writing that made me laugh. ‘hi do you have a minute to discuss our dragonlord and saviour placidusax’#and then leonnis is immediately struck down by bayle’s lightning
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so i saw that ask you responded to re: problematic kinks and i was wondering what your thoughts were regarding like. non offending pedophiles (dont think of that as a kink but its what the ask made me think of). i hear a lot about restorative justice and how that relates to sexual assault but i have no idea what the approach is to stop offenses from happening if someone is worried they will escalate. i don't think porn addiction or whatever is real or that certain porn always leads to certain behaviors/perceptions but i never really see escalation in general ever talked about. is it just a shame cycle that stops people from changing? or is it a hardwired thing?
the reason you're stuck is because you're treating child sexual abuse, asymmetrically, as though it is a function of individual attraction or desire. when we talk about other forms of child abuse, we don't invent a psychological state that inexorably compels the perpetrator to commit abuse, and we understand the abuse to arise in the context of children's social, legal, and economic disempowerment. furthermore, when we talk about sexual abuse of adults, we don't present it as the inevitable outcome of an irresistable desire, or really as having anything to do with desire in the first place; it is a form of violence that both arises from and perpetuates structures of misogyny, racism, ableism, &c. when you try to discuss csa by discoursing about The Pedophile, nefarious individual afflicted with an evil and uncontrollable desire, you treat csa as though it is ontologically distinct from both other forms of child abuse and other manifestations of sexual abuse. this is a myth that specifically justifies closer family control over children, despite the fact that most csa comes from people the child knows and is structurally disempowered in comparison to: parents, priests, doctors, &c. this framing is not just fruitless but harmful.
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#tbh this year has taught me that I really am a leader#like leadership is 100% where I really shine and I’m damn good at it#getting more involved with my community has been so amazing and really restored my confidence in myself and my joy for life#like being on the exec board of the psych grad student association has let me make so many cool little differences#I came up with the idea to have my friend come give a talk to our department bc she’s a post doc about to be on the job market#and her talks are kick ass!!! it’s about how to merge feminism with psychology and how to incorporate lesser known research methods#and so I just finished booking her today!!! I get to help a friend AND my community gets an amazing talk!! win win!#my work as a representative on the biological sciences council is going strong and I sent out an inquiry about finding a new rep to join us#and the open letter I sent to my department regarding a lot of drama didn’t just end there#I came up with reasonable changes to the department that could prevent the drama that was caused and brought them to dept leadership#to make things even better I personally reached out to the opposite side and asked to get coffee for us to discuss the recent drama#as a chance for us to mend bridges and align ourselves with concrete goals and making things better#rather than being in opposition to one another#like this year was supposed to be low key. I took on very low effort exec board positions and tried to center other students#but even with that being said I still just. Shine I feel like#like I step up to the plate and get shit done without stepping on toes and really making an impact#idk I’m sorry to ramble like this but I’m just so!!! proud!!!#I was so stuck and aimless for years due to mental health. and I kept fighting. and it feels like I’m really coming out the other side#and it first is being shown with my activism work which is SUCH A HUGE PART OF WHO I AM#and then it’ll bleed into research and academics!!!#which like my academics are actually good now but they’re not to the kick ass levels I’m used to yet so that’ll come#but idk. this quarter I feel really alive again. my med adjustment happened in early Jan and everything is going so much better#I really feel myself slowly coming alive again for the first time since I lived in Philly#I’m just#I’m very proud of me today. I can feel that love for myself coming back and it’s honestly so nice
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Everything
Summary: You're used to staying still whenever Astarion feeds on you. This time, he wants you to feel everything.
Pairing: Astarion x female!Tav
Warnings: 18+. Vampire bite. Blood drinking. Blood kink. Inappropriate use of tadpoles. Dry humping if you squint. Handjob. Innuendo. PiV. Creampie. Precum.
Word count: 3.2k
AUTHOR'S NOTE: At the time of posting this fic (Feb 11th), I was unaware of a fic by @bhaalism that had been posted on Feb 6th and that some similarities are present, even if totally unbeknownst to me. It was not consciously done, but I can understand how some people might see it differently. I've discussed the matters privately with Kita and, as such, here's the link to their fic so you can check them out and appreciate their work!
I also want to emphasise that no negative behaviour should come of this (in either direction) as we've both discussed matters privately, and no one else has to get involved!
You've done this so many times before that it feels as natural as second nature.
It feels right.
If the multiple scrolls of Lesser Restoration are anything to go by, this is meant to be a prolonged feeding session.
You don't mind.
And by the looks of it, neither does Astarion as he pulls you by the waist to sit more comfortably on his lap.
He has this ritual of sorts with you. It would be so easy to tilt your head to the side, exposing your neck to his bite and let him feed comfortably, but he takes his time.
And you know it's only a matter of time before you start feeling it.
“You can just feed, you know?” you purr, pressing your forehead against his.
As expected, he huffs in feigned annoyance.
“Gods, are you about to lecture me with the ‘don't play with your food’ nonsense, darling?” he bites out dramatically, but you do know he enjoys a good tease.
“Maybe I should,” you say, swirling the soft curls at the nape of his neck around your finger. “You need to feed, after all.”
A devious smile curves his lips and you pull back to slip from his lap.
But he immediately halts you halfway with a firm grip on your waist, fingertips digging into your skin and holding you in place.
Oh?
This is new.
And that's when you first feel it twitch for the first time.
It's no surprise that Astarion gets easily hard with you and for you. In fact, it doesn't take much effort at all. It's as if his body is set to react to yours in unfathomable ways.
But when you press down softly against him, and the motion earns a groan from him and yet another twitch from his cock, you know this is different.
Usually, he feeds on you as you lay flat on your bed, making use of the comfort a mattress can provide as he drinks your blood.
It is easy and quick and enough.
But tonight, it seems that Astarion has other plans and his lustful gaze paired with his hardening cock are proof enough.
He is evidently hungry for more than just your blood.
“As much as I adore you under me,” he begins, gaze dropping to your shirt, “I think I'd rather have you on top of me this time.”
Your hands come to grip his shoulders for balance, and your eyes widen slightly. “Why?”
A gentle tug at the laces of your nightdress nearly breaks your concentration, but you somehow manage to keep your composure as his crimson eyes find yours.
“Why not? Why shouldn't this delicacy be shared?” he asked with another tug and you felt the fabric at your chest begin to loosen. “You should enjoy it, too, darling. And I want you to feel everything.”
He emphasises his words with a final pull that brings your nightdress fully apart, unravelling your breasts to his hungry gaze. They heave in unison with your quickened breathing and it's enough to transfix him.
You can't necessarily feel it, but you are certain his cock just got harder just as blood rushes downwards, swelling your clit.
The shift in temperature causes your nipples to slowly harden and that is what makes him groan.
“Enjoying the view?”
He nods. “You can feel how much I do.”
You feigned ignorance. “I don't think I can.”
The grip on your waist tightens and he pulls you against his cock, the flimsy fabric of your undergarments allowing your clit to drag along his covered length.
Hard and needy.
“You were saying…?”
Smug and cheeky and infuriating.
Three adjectives that fall short to fully grasp how he is with you when it comes to intimacy, but it's a good place to start.
He's good and he knows it and he wants you to validate him every step of the way.
“Connect your tadpole with mine,” he says unexpectedly.
“What? Why?”
“You know why.”
You do and it baffles you that he even suggested it in the first place. Connecting tadpoles intimately is reserved for when privacy is a guarantee. And being inside one of the many rooms at the Elfsong Tavern offers everything but privacy.
“We're at a tavern, Astarion…”
He quirks an eyebrow, bucking his hips upwards ever so slightly. “Yes, I'm aware. Your point being…?”
“We'll be heard.”
“Do you not intend on being loud?”
Your mouth falls agape at the nerve. Silence is never an option with him. He takes pride in how he makes you feel, knowing fully well he's ruined you for anyone else.
“Would you have it any other way?”
His cock twitches in response, but it's the way his half-hooded eyes roam deliciously slow across your face that makes you clench.
“And miss the opportunity to inconvenience our next-door neighbours?” he tuts with a smirk that bares his fangs. “I don't think so.”
In the midst of all the lust-heavy words and slow hip rolls, you manage out a chuckle.
“You're vicious. Shadowheart and Lae'zel will definitely not appreciate the midnight ruckus.”
He bucks his hips so that your face gets close enough for your lips to brush.
“And what exactly are they going to do, hmm?” he says with a smirk. “Kill me?”
Before you can answer, he leans in and captures your bottom lip in between his teeth. The suddenness of it all, makes you flinch back and when a fang grazes the frail skin, it draws blood.
It stings enough for you to curse, and you see his hungry gaze admiring the droplet that pools on your lip.
“They could do much worse to you,” you tease with a giggle, proving your point by denying him the taste of your blood when he leans in again.
He lets out a low rumble of disapproval as he slumps against the headboard. “If by ‘worse’ you mean ‘whispering healing prays and hurling nonsensical curse words’, then I agree. A torment,” he feigned pain dramatically.
There is something oddly satisfying about teasing Astarion to the brink of frustration.
You almost feel inclined to satisfy his bloodlust, but decide against it, wiping the droplet with a swipe of your tongue.
That immediately earns a deep frown from him and an obnoxious click of his tongue. “Honestly, what a waste.”
“Then be nice,” you say, pressing a quick kiss to his lips.
Astarion's hips buck and you're sure your undergarments are soaked enough for the wetness to seep through the fabric of his trousers. If he feels it, he doesn't say.
When you pull away, there's a faint stain of blood on his lower lip, which he pulls in between his teeth to suckle on it gently.
The sight is enough to have you roll your hips twice.
Suddenly, he looks uncharacteristically serious. “Connect your tadpole with mine.”
There is urgency in his voice and you can only assume he is past warming up and ready to move on to the next step.
And you're not one to deny the offer of a good time if there is a promise that him feeding on you can be pleasurable to you as well.
You allow your mind to stir the dorment tadpole, urging it to find his.
It is rather simple and you've done it before with him during your sexual endeavours. But this is different. It already feels different. It's as if the worm knows this connection bears other purposes.
Astarion lets out a groan when his body meets yours through his mind.
The tug inside your head is enough to draw a breathy gasp as you are made aware of his intentions.
He wants your hand.
Your… hand?
Your eyebrows furrow together in confusion, but not for long enough as his hand pulls yours from his shoulder.
And what he does next makes you clench so hard, you feel a gush of wetness drip from you.
“I want you to feel it – everything – as I feast on your blood,” he purrs, placing your hand around his throat.
Oh.
The tadpole squirms in anticipation as you feel his cock throbbing in your mind and against your clothed clit.
His skin is cool to the touch but it quickly heats up under your palm and, with his other hand, he undoes the laces of his trousers with unmatched dexterity.
You gasp as his thoughts bleed into you, allowing you to know what he expects next.
This time, he doesn't need to utter aloud his intentions.
You can hear him inside your head and you find yourself utterly unable to look away from his piercing eyes.
Take it out and grip it, darling.
Your hips buck, driven by pure instinct as you comply with his request. A shaky hand reaching down and tugging at the fabric of his own undergarments, and in one swift motion, you free his cock.
As expected, he immediately welcomes your grip with a thrust, and you feel just how hard and wet he already is.
His cock is still cool to the touch, but you know that is about to change soon enough.
With a gentle squeeze, his eyes flutter shut, head tilting back slightly as he adjusts to your touch.
It doesn't take long for a thick bead of precum to roll down his length before reaching your knuckles.
Inside your head, your tadpole shudders and you're sure it's because he wants to feel how swollen your clit is for him.
It pulsates rhythmically and Astarion growls with a smirk.
He adores feeling your clit.
Just as you adore feeling how stiff his cock can get in your hand and in your mind.
“You're already quite hard already,” you say, doing a laughable poor job at keeping your voice steady.
“I can get harder,” he says and you feel his voice rumbling against your palm.
You clench in sheer reflex. Mostly because you know he can and will.
Instinctively, you let out a soft moan from the delicious friction.
And it's enough to have Astarion's ego soar high enough that it pulls the most devilishly alluring smirk from his lips.
After all, he never misses the chance to remind you that it is your blood that makes his cock thicker and warmer and harder.
Astarion finally opens his eyes again and brings his hand to your face, fingers tracing your jawline before he tips your head to the side, exposing your neck to him.
Hold on tight, darling.
He cranes his head and he plants a fleeting kiss below your ear, as he grazes his cool lips along the length of your neck. By now, he knows your pulse points by heart, so when he finds one, his fangs break skin and sink into your inviting flesh.
Out of reflex, you grip his cock tighter and he lets out a muffled groan.
No matter how many times you allow him to feed on you, the initial uncomfortable feeling is always there and it lingers until his lips wrap around the bleeding wounds.
And when he begins to suckle hungrily, downing mouthfuls of your blood, you nearly moan from the way you can feel it under your palm.
Your tadpole allows you to be aware of your blood rushing and coursing through his body at a steady pace and when it finally reaches his lower half, a faint pulse stirs his cock.
Immediately, you clench, frustrated that it's around nothing, but you quickly brush the disappointment aside as you finally understand why he wanted your hands around him.
He swallows your blood at a rhythm that matches the throb in his cock, and inside your head you can feel it beat in unison with the one in your clit.
It's your blood that brings him alive in more ways than one.
Warmth spreads across your palm and fingers and the veins that snake around his length begin to bulge as your blood fills them.
Tighter… tighter… tighter.
He repeats it like a prayer that he hopes you can answer.
He's so lost in you that his senses blur and he becomes one with you.
You try your best to comply, the back of your hand soaked with precum, as he hardens even more.
In between your legs, your clit swells up as if in response and you're so wet you're sure he'd be able to slide his cock inside with little to no effort.
How is it possible? How…
The connection allows him to hear your thoughts and he groans in response, rolling his hips at a clumsy and broken pace.
Astarion's concentration is hanging on by a thread. You can hear him curse in sheer frustration as he tries to hold on to some semblance of control.
But he gets too drunk in your blood and he is unable to keep his focus.
It doesn't help that your own arousal is spilling into his mind and mixing with his own.
A double-edged sword.
He wanted you to feel him as he feeds on you, and now he's stuck having to withstand double the arousal and the pleasure that your blood provides.
The first loud growl comes from him and you feel your grip around his cock loosen as he thickens.
Your walls flutter and he feels it, bringing one hand down to close around yours, ensuring you grip him firmly once again.
You keep clenching like that and I…
His next words aren' heard in your head and you feel your body begin the inevitable battle between overwhelming pleasure and the numbness that always comes whenever he feeds.
A faint growl slips past your lips and it quickly morphs into a strangled cry that echoes around the room.
You want to call out his name and warn him… warn him that your body can't take much more bloodloss and arousal.
But the tug inside your mind lets you know that he knows.
After all, your body is his now.
Just as his is yours.
He fucks your hand slowly with his atop yours, keeping the pace. The lump in his throat bobs rhythmically with each gulp.
Astarion… it's too much…
It takes him a couple of more seconds, two more mouthfuls and at least five more thrusts of his cock for him to finally unlatch from your neck with a guttural growl.
He drags his warm tongue across the puncture wounds, not wasting the rivulets of blood that dribble down.
The wet sound is nearly intoxicating and you nearly jump in his lap as his other hand finds your breast, fingers tugging at your hardened nipple.
Astarion is close and, by extension, so are you.
Your blood rushes throughout his entire body and you now understand how good it feels. How good you feel inside him. He's warm and flushed from feeding on you and his head tilts back against the headboard as loses himself in you.
Somehow, he's able to keep a steady pace as he fucks your hand, the most beautiful moans spilling from his mouth as he does so.
You caress his neck lovingly as he tugs on your nipple.
“Darling…”
It's a plea.
Under different circumstances, you'd have to ask him what he wanted. But you're inside his head and you know why he's begging you.
He doesn't want his cum to go to waste.
He doesn't think the tightness and warmth and wetness your hand and fingers can provide.
I need to be inside you.
The alarm in his voice stuns you momentarily and your eyes widen as a very urgent tug
He's about to come.
You let go of his cock and his hands are suddenly in between your legs.
Your body reacts to this instantly and your walls tighten in anticipation, eager to squeeze something else.
Stop. Clenching.
A loud moan is all you give him in return as your vision blurs from how his cock pulses and throbs and leaks precum.
Another clench.
“Gods above… I can't take it anymore.”
And neither can you.
You hear the sound of fabric being torn filling your ears and his hands claw at your waist to position himself at your entrance.
A languid snap of his hips and he sinks into you, stretching you in a way that has you slumping against his chest, hardened nipples grazing his skin as he bottoms out.
He's so thick from your blood that you're sure you'll be sore from it, but none of that matters now.
All that matters is that you're stuffed to the brim, his balls pressing against you and the best part is that you can feel how he feels.
You're not sure whose climax hits first as you're so entwined with him.
You reckon it's his as you feel his balls tighten and cum coarse through his length, spilling into you with hurried thrusts.
It feels too good to be true.
You can feel just how tight you are around him and you can feel each gush of cum leaving his bodu
He whines. “I… it feels – Gods…”
Astarion is a babbling mess under you and his words soon lose meaning as they become incomprehensible.
The sound of skin slapping against skin mixed with the creamy sounds of you milking his cock is enough to send you into overdrive.
The uncontrollable contractions hit you like a tidal wave and both you and Astarion groan in unison as you both get thrust into each other's climaxes.
Your head is buried in the crook of his neck and you vaguely think in the haze of your peak that you should use a scroll of Lesser Restoration. You're still bleeding from the wounds and the fear that you might faint looms on the horizon.
But pleasure overcomes numbness and you welcome it with no resistance.
Still, as Astarion gets warmer and warmer, you begin to fade to the coldness.
Your tadpole is writhing with his and you feel him push you from him so that he can latch his lips against your bleeding wounds, careful to keep his fangs to himself.
He suckles gently as you descend from your shared climax and it's as if the action could lull him into a trance.
Blindly, you try to feel for a scroll that is somewhere scattered across the bed.
He's still buried deep inside you when the connection is severed, showing no signs of slipping out.
You find what you're looking for and utter the right words to activate the scroll, battling against your laboured breaths.
Vigour blooms inside you almost instantly and you feel warmth spread throughout your body with each pump of your heart.
The wounds close and he has no choice but to unlatch one final time, lips dripping with blood.
“I think I understand now… why you wanted to try this…” you breathe out, collapsing against him again.
The sudden motion causes a few droplets of cum to drip from you.
His hand is splattered across your back, fingers caressing your flushed skin. “Why are you so surprised? You should know by now that I always deliver what I promise.”
You think it's impossible to love him even more, but the way he holds you surely tests your resolve.
“This was really good… really, really good,” you say.
“Keep on praising me like that, and we'll have to go for a second round.”
Two loud bangs on the wall are heard accompanied by a “Tsk'va!” and you chuckle.
“Well, do you think our neighbours enjoyed the show, darling?”
You doubt it, but this isn't about anyone but you and him.
Masterlist
#astarion#astarion bg3#astarion x tav#astarion x reader#astarion smut#astarion x you#astarion x female tav#astarion x female reader#astarion x f!tav#astarion x f!reader#astarion x oc
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Hi!! I love your homicipher fics! Have you thought about writing nsfw hcs? Specifically for Mr. Crawling and Silvair? I hope your night / day is going well! :)
⊱ Mr. Crawling and Mr. Silvair ⊰ || NSFW Alphabet (A-Z) Headcanons
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Character(s): Mr. Crawling, Mr. Silvair (Homicipher/文字化化, Separate) Reader Type: Human (Gender-Neutral Pronouns, No Sex-Specific Genitalia is Mentioned but it was Written with an AFAB Reader in Mind) Warning(s): 18+ Content, Virgin Asexual Author, Cum Eating, Facials, Minor Objectification, Cuckoldry, Mutual Masturbation, Face-fucking, Sexual Fantasies, Tickling, Praise/Degradation Kink, Breeding Kink/Creampies, BDSM, Overstimulation, Orgasm Control/Denial, Dumbification, Dacryphilia, Hair-pulling, Light Impact Play, Light Breathplay, Implied Cunnilingus/Blowjobs, Cock Warming, Mention/Discussion of Sex Toys… If I missed anything, please let me know! Genre: Headcanons, Smut (Minors Do Not Interact), Fluff Word Count: 7,200 words Request: “Hi!! I love your homicipher fics! Have you thought about writing nsfw hcs? Specifically for Mr. Crawling and Silvair? I hope your night / day is going well! :)” Author’s Note: I’m still very much working on getting better at writing spicier content, and I had no clue how to start writing these kinds of headcanons from scratch, so I went ahead and just filled out the NSFW Alphabet for both Mr. Crawling and Mr. Silvair as a jumping off point! It’s definitely interesting to think about how both of these characters would be in a sexually intimate setting, especially since – at least in my mind – they’d be quite different from each other in a variety of aspects even if they did have some overlap on a few of the points. I did my best to keep each of their headcanons at a similar word length (which was kind of hard to do with my Mr. Crawling bias, but I think I accomplished it haha). Anyway, I hope you enjoy these headcanons! ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
→ If you enjoyed my work, please reblog it if you can! Exposure on Tumblr is based on reblogging content rather than liking it, so your support would be much appreciated! ♡
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A: Aftercare (What they’re like after sex)
👣: Mr. Crawling is immensely clingy after having sex, holding onto you and pretty much refusing to let go as he nuzzles his face into the crook of your neck or your hair. While he doesn’t want to get up from the bed or leave after the two of you have been intimate, if you’re hungry or thirsty or if you want to go take a bath, he’s happy to go fetch you something to restore your energy or help you to the bathroom to clean up. He’s quite good at aftercare, even if he doesn’t realize what he’s doing counts as it. Mr. Crawling just likes making you feel good, and he wants to keep you safe and happy! His favorite thing to do is help you bathe; he enjoys the way the warm water feels on his skin while he washes your back for you.
💉: Mr. Silvair isn’t too affectionate after the two of you are intimate, but he’ll check up on you and ask if you need him to get you anything. If your wrists were rubbed raw from the restraints he had placed on you, he would make sure to carefully wrap gauze around your irritated skin. If you were thirsty or hungry, he would locate something safe for you to consume to get your strength back up. If you feel sticky or gross afterward, he’ll carefully wipe your body with a wet cloth to make sure you are clean and comfortable. He lets you sleep and typically goes about his own business. Sometimes, though, Mr. Silvair finds himself watching over you to make sure you’re breathing steadily, carefully combing his fingers through your hair.
B: Body Part (Their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)
👣: Mr. Crawling doesn’t have a favorite part of your body since he honestly enjoys every aspect of you but, if he had to choose, he loves your hands. He knows that they can hurt people and cause a lot of pain, but he loves the way they feel when you cup his face to softly caress it or whenever you thread your fingers through his hair. For himself, Mr. Crawling loves his hair the most (I know it’s not technically a body part, but I think it makes the most sense for him); he pretty much melts whenever you play with it, and his head is quite sensitive, so he blue screens whenever you pull at his hair or rake your nails across his scalp. I also feel like Mr. Crawling would be proud of his arms since they’re fairly toned considering they’re his primary means of getting around. Because of his impressive strength, despite what his thinner frame may portray, he’s able to hold you up and move you around with relative ease (he 100% can manhandle you, but only will if you’re cool with it).
💉: Mr. Silvair finds every aspect of your body fascinating, and he could probably explain why each part of you was interesting from a medical perspective or that everything was pleasant to look at in one way or another. If he had to pick a favorite part of your body, though, he would have to say it’s your head (I know, kind of weird, but he does appreciate your intelligence and, well… Ending 06 is my other piece of reasoning haha). Specifically, though, he likes your mouth. He enjoys being able to hold your head in place while your jaw hangs open, all while he just goes to town while you drool and choke around his cock. Don’t worry, though – he’ll find some remedy to lessen the soreness you feel in your throat afterward. For himself, he’s quite proud of his hands. Mr. Silvair is skilled at many things, and being able to make you come undone with his fingers alone makes him feel a sense of power (plus, you called them pretty once, and it made him feel good).
C: Cum (Anything to do with cum)
👣: Mr. Crawling gets extremely flustered whenever he sees his cum on any part of your body, from your hair to your face to your stomach. The sight of it alone on your skin makes his brain short-circuit and body flare up – it only makes him want to touch you even more. He likes being able to clean you up, too, leaning forward before he runs his tongue along your body or face, making sure there wasn’t a single drop of his cum left on you (even if now it meant you were covered in saliva…). He doesn’t mind tasting himself, but it most certainly doesn’t compare to your flavor.
💉: I probably need to ask you to stay with me on this one, but I think Mr. Silvair would probably keep your cum stored away in a sample tube or something along those lines, having a desire to run tests on it to see what he could create. Views your cum as a valuable resource in his research...yay? Maybe he could even use your release to invent some kind of lubricant since that’s not easily accessible in the other world and make having sex much more streamlined… or he just keeps it around to show you later and see your reaction to the fact he keeps your cum stored away in his laboratory to tease you.
D: Dirty Secret
👣: The thought of taking you in public, in a space where no one but you could see him, makes his mind race and his body feel like it was on fire – this man can act like a feral dog sometimes. I mean, even you sometimes forgot he was there, unable to see his form unless you concentrated hard enough, so imagine if the two of you went out somewhere in public and he (with your consent, of course), just started touching you? Groping your ass, his face between your legs as he runs his hands along your inner thighs… no one can see that it’s him making your face flush and not the excuse of a fever you told the concerned stranger in the hopes they would leave you alone. When you half-heartedly glare at him to try and get him to lay off for a bit, he just laughs at your expression… how rude!
💉: Mr. Silvar wouldn’t be opposed to having a threesome with another resident of the other world. After all, he would be curious to see how differently you acted when another person was there with the two of you, or if your body reacted in an unlikely way if another were to touch you. While I will not write NSFW for Mr. Chopped (the power dynamic there isn’t my favorite thing in the world), he would be the one Mr. Silvair would feel most at ease sharing you with; Mr. Crawling or Mr. Hood would be his second and third choices respectively since he knows how deeply you trust them. He might not even partake in sex either, just sitting off to the side while he lets another use you like a toy. As long as you know your his, though, he doesn’t mind watching you enjoy yourself with another (he has to be there, though).
E: Experience (How experienced are they? Do they know what they’re doing?)
👣: Mr. Crawling has absolutely zero experience with this kind of stuff, so he would need someone willing to walk him through the whole process, show him what you like, and teach him what and what not to do. What he lacks in experience, though, he makes up for in pure enthusiasm. It’s quite flattering how determined he is when it comes to making you feel good, even if it’s a bit sloppy and unpracticed. His thrusts are extremely unpredictable, never quite finding their rhythm… It’s alright, though; he’ll definitely get better with more time and the more he gets to understand what your body likes. You just have to give him the time to improve, and he’ll be certain to leave you breathless.
💉: Mr. Silvair also has no experience when it comes to sex, or at least not any while he’s resided in the other world. He is a life-long learner through and through, though, and there’s nothing in the universe he’s not willing to learn about, especially if it has to do with humans and their anatomy. His thrusts are frighteningly accurate, being able to hit your most sensitive inner spots with ease to have you begging him to give you a moment to breathe. He’s an almost terrifyingly fast learner, too, being able to apply whatever new information he’s observed and gathered within moments. He can do it perfectly, too, and he does it in a way that has you questioning whether he was telling the truth when he said this was his first time doing anything like this.
F: Favorite Position
👣: When it comes to favorite positions, Mr. Crawling loves being able to hold you close to him while also being able to see your face (he has to kiss you during sex – sorry, I don’t make the rules). He enjoys the rocking horse position since it allows him to be able to hold you close while still being able to maintain eye contact with you and easily have access to cover your face in kisses. While he prefers being the one making you feel good, Mr. Crawling would also enjoy the cowgirl position. He’s happy to let you use him to your heart's content while being able to look up and soak in the pleased look that’s plastered across your features while you slam your hips up and down on his cock.
💉: Mr. Silvair personally enjoys the butterfly position, having you lay on your back atop his operation table all while he can watch and take mental notes on every single facial expression you make and every single twitch of your muscles while he drives you absolutely insane. He would also enjoy missionary, but he would spice it up a little bit by having your hands or wrists tied to something. After all, he doesn’t want you to touch him unless he says you can – just lay there quietly while he completely wrecks you with that annoyingly calm expression on his face. It’s not that he doesn’t enjoy when you touch him, though. Mr. Silvair simply prefers being the one in charge and determining when and where you’re able to feel his skin beneath your hands.
G: Goofy (Are they more serious in the moment, or are they humorous, etc.)
👣: Acts goofy most of the time during sex, even if he doesn’t mean to. He likes being able to make you happy, and he finds your laughter to be music to his ears. Sometimes you two will be having sex, and he’ll suddenly start giggling completely unprovoked, just finding the experience with you so joyful. Being with you in any capacity makes his chest feel light and fluttery as a sense of giddiness flows through his veins. He’ll wrap his arms around you and nuzzle into your neck, causing your body to spasm and tighten around him while his long hair drapes over you and tickles your skin. Overall, Mr. Crawling enjoys being more playful when the two of you are intimate since it adds to the overall experience for him.
💉: Prefers to be serious while having sex. He treats the whole process of intercourse like one would treat a research project which, honestly, can make you feel a bit annoyed in some instances (Mr. Silvair still doesn’t quite understand why, though). He’s methodical in everything he does, and being light-hearted or purposefully humorous isn’t high on his list of things to do. He has no problem if you want to be silly, however. He finds it cute when you try to see if you can make him chuckle. It endears you to him more, and it makes him want to keep you around for even longer. The only goofy thing he does is gently run his fingers up and down your sides while thrusting into you, finding the way your body wriggles and writhes away from his touch to be adorable.
H: Hair (How well-groomed are they, does the carpet match the drapes, etc.)
👣: I think Mr. Crawling would have fairly long hair beneath the metaphorical belt. His pubic hair would be thick, curly, and a very dark shade of black. He doesn’t really keep himself groomed (kind of hard to do in his world, plus it was never a priority for him), but if you would prefer him to keep it trimmed, he’d be happy to! He doesn’t care one way or another.
💉: Mr. Silvair comes off to me as someone who would enjoy keeping themselves groomed and their appearance well-maintained, and I mean every inch of his body. I think he would have either no pubic hair or pubic hair that was trimmed to be the perfect length. If he did have any hair below the belt, it would be a gray color, one that was a shade darker than his regular hair and wavy in texture.
I: Intimacy (How are they during the moment, romantic aspect)
👣: One of the more human-like members of the cast when it comes to his affections; he’s as romantic as a non-human being can be. Mr. Crawling loves holding you close as he ruts into you like a wild dog, whispering praises against your skin. He even tries his best to learn phrases in your language so he can tell you how much you mean to him without you having to try and decipher it. He’s always so, so soft with you when you two are having sex. He’s honored that you’d let him have you in such a way, and finds your trust in him heartwarming – he trusts you, too, with his entire heart and soul.
💉: Mr. Silvair canonically doesn’t comprehend the concept of “liking” or loving someone, so that also translates into sex with him. All he knows is that he finds you entertaining to be around and that he’s somewhat endeared to you at this point. He’s not romantic but, in between teasing you and making you cry (whether it be in frustration or overstimulation), he’s checking in on you to make sure that you’re still comfortable. He knows sex can be invasive, and he’s aware of how much regard the act is held in by some people in your world, so he does his best to respect that... Even if he does need to check himself every now and again.
J: Jack Off (Masturbation headcanon)
👣 and 💉: Neither of them masturbates much because they simply don’t have a desire or time to do so. Mr. Crawling would rather wait for you to be there so you two can enjoy yourselves together, and Mr. Silvair simply has more important matters to attend to. That’s not to say they never masturbate, though, it’s just typically a rare occurrence.
👣: Mr. Crawling typically masturbates by rutting up against something, like a pillow, rather than taking himself in his hand. His thoughts before meeting you were just focusing on the physical sensation of his cock sliding against the fabric of his clothing, but now he finds himself thinking of you – the way your voice sounds when you coo sweet words in his ear, the warmth of your body. Imagining your hands gently touching his chest and hips makes him cum right then and there, almost embarrassingly quickly… Yeah, he’s down bad.
💉: Mr. Silvair treats masturbating as a chore. He’d much rather be doing something else than leaning against the wall of his operation room while his hand goes absolutely ham on his dick. He knows which areas on his body get the most reaction, so he purposefully presses all of his buttons just so he can be done with it quicker. This doesn’t change after meeting and getting to be intimate with you, though, he still sees it as a chore… Just now he imagines cumming on your face or inside you whenever he finally reaches his climax.
K: Kink (one or more of their kinks)
👣:
Mutual Masturbation: He likes spending time with you and doing things together, so why not spend some time watching each other explore yourselves? He likes observing you as you touch yourself, making mental notes of every spot on your body that have you biting your lip and furrowing your brows. While I wouldn’t say he’s into voyeurism since he does like being with you while you touch yourself instead of tucked away in the shadows just watching, he focuses more on the way your hands touch and caress your skin instead of focusing on the way he moves his hands across his body. Doesn’t last very long doing this, though, eventually pouncing on you and touching you himself.
Overstimulation (Giving): Mr. Crawling loves overstimulating you, even if he doesn’t realize he’s doing it half of the time. He just enjoys seeing you become a blabbering mess all because of him; he takes great pride in being able to make you feel good. However, the first time you started crying because he was simply giving you too much, he felt so guilty – the poor man was on the verge of tears thinking he made you feel bad.
Praise Kink: While praising you is a bit more difficult considering the language barrier and the limited amount of words and phrases he has to choose from, he still loves doing it. Muttering against your skin how you’re doing such a good job, how he loves you so much, how you make him so happy. Mr. Crawling definitely makes sure to reassure you both inside and outside of the bedroom.
Hair Pulling (Receiving): He loves, loves, loves it whenever you take his hair in your hand and give it a firm tug. Mr. Crawling enjoys it whenever he’s going down on you and you take his hair into your hands and push him even closer, making him become fully immersed in your scent and taste.
Sensation Play: While Mr. Crawling may not enjoy more painful experiences, he does like general sensation play quite a bit. He likes the feeling of your breath fanning against his skin while you pepper his flesh with gentle kisses and nips. He enjoys tickling you while his hips sensually thrust in and out, feeling the way you squeeze around him as breathless and airy giggles escape past your lips. He loves whispering into your ear while running his tongue along it before taking your lobe between his teeth and lightly tugging.
💉:
Breeding Kink/Creampie: Mr. Silvair, after learning more about human reproduction, has a deep-seated curiosity regarding whether or not the two of you would be able to have offspring. That’s kind of what starts this particular kink for him – he wants to know if you both are sexually compatible in that aspect, and he is curious what the resulting child would look and act like if they were born in the other world. If you’re unable to give birth or get pregnant, even if his initial interest in breeding is certainly from a more scientific aspect, he still finds the image of you full of his seed while it drips down the curve of your ass to be quite arousing.
Bondage/Shibari (Giving): He enjoys tying you up and pinning you down, being able to have full control over you in the bedroom. He’s perfectly content if you agree to light bondage, like having your hands restrained, and would never ask you to do anything more than that. However, if you trust him enough and feel comfortable doing some more intense bondage, he’s not going to complain. Would definitely be interested in the art of shibari, finding the way the rope looks pressing into your skin tantalizing.
Orgasm Control/Denial (Giving): Another kink that feeds into his desire for control. Mr. Silvair enjoys being the one in charge of your release, and he likes seeing how far he can push you until you finally break and plead for him to let you cum. He loves seeing how stupid and desperate he can make you, sometimes with just his fingers alone.
Overstimulation (Giving): Much like orgasm control/denial, he likes pushing you to your breaking point. However, unlike the previous bullet, he likes seeing how much stimulation you can take until you’re crying for him to stop. He thinks it’s fascinating, seeing how quickly your desire for his touch can change – one moment you’re begging for him to touch you, and the next you’re weakly pushing his hand away. He does eventually relent, of course, but only after letting you cry for a bit.
Dacryphilia: There’s something about seeing your tear-streaked face that makes it feel like he’s just been hit with an arrow in his chest. It’s endearing and oh-so cute the way you look while you sob all because he’s making you feel that good. It makes him feel proud, in a way, seeing you in such a pathetic state all because of him.
L: Location (Favorite places to do the do)
👣: He enjoys having sex with you on a bed (boring, I know), but he likes the softness of the mattress and the many pillows and blankets that can be used to bring even more comfort by keeping the heat from your bodies trapped. He also likes taking you in small, enclosed spaces, like an empty locker or cabinet (sorry folks with claustrophobia). Much like the reasoning with the bed, he likes how the smaller space forces you both to be immensely close to each other. Plus, these spaces bring him comfort, so why not mix the two things that make him feel safe together?
💉: Either in his laboratory/operation room or in one of the many different cages or prison cells that he has access to (bonus points if you allow him to chain you up hehe). Mr. Silvair doesn’t need a soft mattress or pillows to enjoy sex with you. He’s fine taking you on his operation table or the cold concrete floor of the small prison cell, even if your back moving up and down across the ground rubs your skin raw. He’ll patch you up after, no worries, but he doesn’t need a lot of bells and whistles to have an enjoyable time.
M: Motivation (What turns them on, gets them going)
👣: Sweet words and gentle touches. The other world is one full of violence and death, one where survival trumps all else. While there are entities like him who only resort to violence when either their safety or the safety of someone they’re fond of is in danger, it’s still not a happy or bright place to exist. Mr. Crawling does what he can to enjoy life, laughing in situations that probably aren’t even that funny just to try and make existing more enjoyable. Then you come along and make him feel cared for – loved – and safe, and he’s never been happier. Being able to lay with you, to feel you clench around his cock with your warmth while you pepper kisses across his face and let him know how good he is… Yeah, this is the life.
💉: Power and control. He enjoys being able to restrict your movement, being able to dictate when and where you’re allowed to cum and, if you disobey him, he’ll punish you with a sadistic smile on his face. However, he would be lying if he said that was all. Mr. Silvair thinks the fact you trust him with your safety – your life, your heart, your existence – gets him going, whether he realizes it or not. Trusting another in the other world showcases how much two people believe in the fact the other would not do anything to purposefully harm them, and you feel that way toward him (and he feels the same toward you). Whenever you call out his “name,” the one you had given him, he finds his hips unconsciously moving even faster at the sound...
N: No (Something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)
👣: Anything involving pain would be a hard no for Mr. Crawling, both giving and receiving. Even though his senses are dull and what would be extremely painful for a human wouldn’t be for him, he still doesn’t particularly enjoy being harmed. When it comes to hurting you in any way, that’s pretty much something he will never concede on. He doesn’t want to do a single thing to hurt you, even if it’s an enjoyable kind of pain.
💉: Pretty much nothing is off the table for him – Mr. Silvair enjoys experimenting, and that’s no different for him in the bedroom. The only extremely hard no would be coprophilia since he just doesn’t see the appeal nor does he want to test to see if he would like it or not. I also feel like he wouldn’t necessarily want a bratty partner or a partner who is constantly trying to take control back in the bedroom.
O: Oral (Preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)
👣: Loves giving oral 101%, and he will give it to you anywhere – in public, in private, while you’re sleeping (with your consent, of course). Mr. Crawling adores having his mouth on you, being able to taste every single part of you while his tongue forces its way inside you, feeling your release dripping past his lips or dribbling down his chin… You taste good, too, better than anything he’s ever had before; he might get addicted to it, to be honest. He eats you out/blows you like a man starving, wanting a chance to have a taste and make you cry out his name while you pull harshly on his black locks and encourage him to keep going. He’s very enthusiastic about it, too, putting in so much effort and energy to get you cumming on his face or in his mouth.
💉: Prefers giving oral over receiving it, but it’s not his favorite thing to do either way. It’s nothing personal, he just prefers using his hands, his cock, or a toy to get you off rather than his mouth. If he does allow you to give him a blowjob, he’ll place a collar around your neck and pull on the chain if you get cheeky – after all, he’s the one in charge here. Mr. Silvair enjoys making you kneel in front of him, watching you with a small smile as you take him into your hands and pump once or twice before taking him into your mouth. If the rare occurrence happens when he gives you head, you better thank the universe. He looks so hot, holding your thighs apart while he slowly runs his tongue along your length/slit and teases you until you’re asking him to touch you more.
P: Pace (Are they fast and rough? Slow and sensual?)
👣: Enjoys the slower and sensual side of things, but he typically can’t control himself as soon as he’s inside of you, so he ends up being somewhat fast and rough (not all the time, though... his thrusts remain immensely unpredictable no matter what, and he never seems to find a good rhythm to follow). Mr. Crawling enjoys the intimacy of sex, and he finds comfort in the closeness of your bodies while you two are connected at the hips. He loves being able to hold your hands and place kisses across your cheeks. Sometimes, he’s so caught up in the act of showering you with words of praise and sweet displays of affection that he forgets the fact he’s currently inside you and is supposed to be moving. He does see the appeal of rougher sex, though – it makes him feel almost animalistic whenever you two decide to set the pace for the night.
💉: Mr. Silvair can quickly switch between the two, sometimes almost at a break-neck speed, to the point it feels like you got whiplash from the sudden change of deep and slow thrusts to fast and somehow even deeper ones (he’s very precise when it comes to hitting those sweet spots inside of you – it’s actually kind of terrifying how quickly he can locate them). He pretty much does whatever he thinks will get the most reaction out of your body and acts accordingly – nothing more, nothing less. He tends to prefer rougher and faster sex, enjoying the noises the quick snap of his hips can draw out of your mouth. However, sometimes, he finds himself preferring a slower and softer pace. This way, he’s able to focus on and truly soak in the expression on your face and appreciate the way your body feels under his palms (this sometimes just leads to you cock warming him).
Q: Quickie (Their opinions on quickies rather than proper sex, how often, etc.)
👣: Mr. Crawling is down for anything at any time. Pretty much, if you ask him to have sex, he’ll happily do it for you. Need him to eat you out or give you a blowjob, he’ll gladly oblige! After all, he is always pretty much kneeling, so he’s not being made to go out of his way to do it (even if he would go out of his way to please you). Want something more than just his tongue? That’s perfectly fine, too! There’s a private room over there he’ll gladly take you in, or maybe you’d want to try doing it in the empty locker? He’ll try not to take too long, but it’s hard since he loves being able to enjoy you to the fullest. So, Mr. Crawling can do quickies for sure, but he likes being able to take his time with you.
💉: While he’s not opposed to quickies, he prefers being able to have proper sex with you to get the most out of it. After all, he can’t exactly see how long it takes for you to break or how much time it takes for you to start crying and babbling if you only have a few minutes to enjoy one another. However, he does make it a little challenge for himself to see how quickly he can get you to climax. Mr. Silvair will even make educated guesses on how fast you’ll finish just by making note of your current expression, body language, etc. He likes seeing how flustered you get if you think someone is going to enter the room the two of you are in, begging him to go faster which only makes him want to slow down – how mean!
R: Risk (Are they game to experiment, do they take risks, etc.)
👣: Mr. Crawling is down to experiment but, as stated before, he doesn’t want to try anything that causes him or you harm, even if pain is something you enjoy. He just has no desire to hurt you in any way, something which is quite different from other members of the cast who are definitely more sadistic (cough, Mr. Silvair and Mr. Machete, cough). I feel like he would be down to partake in certain aspects of BDSM, specifically B/D (bondage and discipline) and D/S (dominance and submission). He just wants to have a good time and be close to you, both physically and emotionally.
💉: 100% down to experiment with anything (except the previously mentioned coprophilia). If you wanted to try some breathplay or impact play or even blood play, he’d be down for it. I honestly think he would enjoy breathplay since it adds more to the differential in power that he enjoys so much (there’s also a stirring in his chest when he sees how much you trust him with your life, but shhh…). Mr. Silvair is a man hungry for information and new experiences, so yes, he’s willing to try a variety of different things even if they could potentially be dangerous – he’ll always make sure you return to your original form.
S: Stamina (How many rounds can they go for, how long do they last…)
👣 and 💉: Both of them are inhuman, which means that neither of them need any food, water, or rest to survive. Honestly, the two of them have unlimited amounts of stamina, and they can go for as long as you need them to (which could be two rounds or even eight – nothing is holding them back in the stamina department).
T: Toys (Do they own toys? Do they use them? On a partner or themselves?)
👣 and 💉: Neither of them owns any toys because, well… you can’t access them easily in the other world. If they do end up there, though, they’re probably dirty or damaged beyond repair (please do not use nasty sex toys, people – infections and diseases are no joke).
👣: Mr. Crawling would be down to use toys on you! After all, why not? It’ll just make the experience more fun, right? You’ll probably have to explain what he’s supposed to do with them, though, since he’s not quite sure what some of them are for. If you want to use toys on him, he’s completely fine with that! Want to wear a strap and give him backshots? Go right ahead! Want to tape vibrators to him until he’s whining and writhing? He’d be happy to oblige! Overall, he’s pretty chill about it and is somewhat enthusiastic about adding toys into your sex life.
💉: Mr. Silvair enjoys using sex toys on you, some of his favorites being cock rings/chastity belts, strangely-shaped dildos, and vibrators. He loves being able to secure the variety of different vibrators he owns to your body, making sure to cover every erogenous zone he’s noted. He doesn’t typically want toys used on him (but he’d probably try out a variety of different sex toys on himself after a while, though, curious about how each of them felt or what they did), however, and the only one he’d be willing to use consistently would be fleshlights. He’d make you watch him use it, never once allowing you to use them on him.
U: Unfair (How much they like to tease)
👣: Mr. Crawling is very fair, and he always makes sure to give you exactly what you want in the bedroom. However, that’s not to say he never teases you, he just doesn’t do it very frequently. Sometimes when he’s going down on you, he’ll pause his minstrations to nip at or kiss the fat of your thighs, keeping your hips held down so you can’t buck up against his mouth. When you start getting antsy, he just giggles at your expression before returning his attention to that oh-so-needy part of you.
💉: If the word unfair was personified, it would be Mr. Silvair. I’d argue teasing you and making you cry – either because you can’t cum or have cum ten times in a row – are the aspects of sex that he enjoys the most. Edging you is one of his favorite things, though, watching you whine and try to move your hips on your own when he stops moving… bad move, though, because now he’s just going to make you wait even longer for release.
V: Volume (How loud they are, what sounds they make)
👣: He’s not loud, per se, but he does make quite a variety of different noises whenever the two of you are intimate. He whimpers and whines frequently while you’re having sex – they’re barely audible, high-pitched, and come out sounding as though he’s completely out of breath. Sometimes you wonder if he’s in pain with the noises he makes, but he’s not. He just really enjoys being able to feel you like this as he pants like a dog in heat.
💉: Completely quiet most of the time. Really, the only noises you’ll probably get out of him are barely audible sighs or the sound of his breathing hitching when he feels you stretch/tighten around him. It’s not that Mr. Silvair doesn’t enjoy having sex with you, he just doesn’t express that feeling verbally. You can tell in the way his hand squeezes the fat of your thigh or the way his hips stutter when he moves in and out that he’s having a good time.
W: Wild Card (Random headcanon)
👣: Mr. Crawling loves taking showers or baths with you, though he leans more towards baths since it’s less painful on his joints (I headcanon that Mr. Crawling can stand, but walking for extended periods of time is painful for him – ambulatory wheelchair user Mr. Crawling when?). While yes, he can technically sit in the shower, having water spray his face isn’t exactly pleasant… He doesn’t view bathing with you as sexual, he just finds it relaxing as he helps you wash your back or you help him make sure all the soap is out of his hair. His favorite scent would have to be lavender – it’s very calming for him.
💉: He keeps a journal tucked away full of terms and gestures from your world. Mr. Silvair has a deep desire to understand humans and everything they have to offer, even if he believes it's from a stance of craving knowledge (really, he wants to be able to express his endearment of you in a manner you can understand). He has a page on kissing and different kinds of kisses, a page on gestures of endearment, another on hugging and cuddling… The fact that humans’ bodies release a hormone whenever they simply spend time to bond with another socially, a hormone that turns the dial on their brain for whatever emotion they’re currently experiencing, is fascinating to him.
X: X-Ray (Let’s see what’s going on in those pants)
👣: Mr. Crawling is tall – and I mean extremely tall whenever he stands up (my man has got to at least be seven feet), so I can assume that he’s probably relatively proportionate under the belt. I feel like he would be big, almost concerningly so, clocking in at around 8 inches in length. Even though his size is impressive, his dick doesn’t have much girth to it and is on the thinner side, but it is thicker towards the base compared to the head (not that you can take all of him – you can certainly give it a try, though). It’s on the veinier side, too, with a very distinct and present one on the underside of his cock.
💉: Much like pretty much the entire cast, Mr. Silvair is also on the taller half of the height spectrum. However, I feel as though he would have a more modest, yet of course still impressive dick size. I imagine him to be 6 ½ inches in length and relatively thick from the base to the head with very little change in girth. Whenever you see his cock, you’re kind of awestruck for a moment because how can a man have such a nice-looking dick?? It doesn’t make sense! There’s barely any hair, there’s no visible veins or bumps, and it’s long and thick enough to drive you wild… Plus, it’s just really nice to look at, honestly.
Y: Yearning (How high is their sex drive?)
👣 and 💉: Okay, so I know others probably will not agree with me here… but I honestly don’t think anyone in the cast has much of a sex drive, let alone a high one. I mean, they’re not human, so their cultural/social norms are different than ours, and I wouldn’t hold them to “typical” human desires on a biological/psychological level either. As I said before, I doubt any of them have been laid because sex just isn’t something the residents in the other world partake in – they’re too busy killing/fighting others, eating humans who find themselves lost in the other world, etc. Is this my asexual and world-building brain working? Probably haha.
👣: Mr. Crawling really only wants sex whenever you want it, but he’s always enthusiastic and does get aroused whenever you ask if he wants to be intimate. While he does love feeling the warmth around his dick whenever you’re clamping down on him, almost like you were hugging him and not wanting to let him go, he enjoys the emotional connection during the moment more than anything else. I headcanon him (and all of the cast, to some degree) as existing somewhere on the aroace-spectrum. For Mr. Crawling, I see him as being reciproromantic/sexual with an average libido – he gets riled up whenever you’re riled up, though there are times he does get horny without you needing to do or say anything.
💉: Much like Mr. Crawling, Mr. Silvair will have sex if you ask him to – he’ll make you beg for it, though, so he’s not as nice as the former. He prefers the control/power he gets from having sex rather than the sole act of intercourse (not to say he doesn’t enjoy the feeling, though). Plus, he finds the activity interesting since he knows it’s something most humans partake in with one another for a variety of reasons, from procreation to recreation. If you ask him to have sex and he isn’t in the mood, he’ll just use his hands or some toys and play around with you until you’re satisfied. I headcanon Mr. Silvair as being quoiromantic and eegosexual with a low libido.
Z: ZZZ (… how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)
👣: Mr. Crawling doesn’t need to sleep (you know… being non-human and all), but he’ll curl up next to you on the bed and hold your body close to his while pretending to sleep alongside you. It’s kind of adorable, the way his head is nuzzled under your neck while his legs and arms are wrapped around your body, holding you close to him like you were a bodypillow or large stuffed animal. While you sleep, though, he’ll eventually place his head against your chest, listening intently to the sound of your heartbeat and the feeling of your chest rising and falling with each breath. Moments like this, laying there with you in silence, make his mind wander to scenarios with you he’ll never be able to fully experience.
💉: Does not rest often, finding it a waste of time that could be spent doing something else. He understands you need your sleep, though, so he lets you do it in peace after you both have had sex. Mr. Silvair always manages to somehow make sure you have enough pillows to keep you comfortable or blankets to keep you from getting cold (you can’t help but wonder where he finds clean linens in such a grimy place…). Occasionally, however, he finds himself sitting next to you on the bed, fingers absentmindedly combing through your hair before he pulls his hand back as though you had burnt him – he doesn’t understand it, and he’s desperate to figure out an answer.
#🌸 . plum writes#🌺 . Plum Thirsts#💌 . anon#homicipher#文字化化#mr crawling#mr crawling x reader#mr crawling x you#mr silvair#mr silvair x reader#mr silvair x you#not sfw#not sfw alphabet#homicipher headcanons#headcanons#smut#cw smut
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the scar Valin has on his jaw from when Drone had a muscle tremour shaving his face... the jagged black line along Drone's left palm where her blade cut into her silicone flesh so deeply it bounced off her titanium metacarpus.
#oc: valin#oc: drone#if she holds his jaw just the same way she did then she can see how the scars fit together.#after the Traveler was restored she allowed her Ghost to heal the flesh.#but only enough to restore severed neural and connective tissue to allow full movement of the digits once more.#the scar itself... she asked that she keep it.#i have this concept that a Ghost would not be able to use its Light to heal when the Traveler was caged.#it is a gameplay component obviously but i think it has no place in lore things. raises the stakes in a logical manner.#and i think it would make a tragedy out of Guardians so reliant on their Ghosts that they have no innate pain tolerance#bar the few moments in which they grapple with being bisected or gutted.#a very long time ago there was a post on here discussing a similar fantasy concept. an overreliance on healing magic or potions.#effectively exploring a more unpleasantly addictive element to it. i found it interesting.#this is not what i am getting at here but i am just pointing out what it reminded me of.#i think a Ghost feeling well and truly helpless if they cannot even heal...#it is what brought Eos—quiet and reserved soft-spoken unseen Eos—to flit about in such terror that had she a heart it would surely fail.#transmatting a few meters at a time as much as her power would allow#letting out a near incomprehensible short-range hastily-encrypted transmission asking of her fellow Ghosts#that one might have a strong and able Guardian to help bring 200lbs of dying weight to a medic.#her chassis is stuck in place by blood dried so thickly it is like tar.#Eos has always been a very tactile companion to Valin.#there is no hesitancy to her actions. when she expands her shell momentarily#and closes so that she catches his skin between the pieces of her hull like two magnets pinching your fingertip.#in that moment she remembers the Dorylus.#strange medicine—to coax an ant into biting around a wound. sealing it shut with their mandibles. decapitating the ant. jaws unrelenting.#she wishes she had better perfected her movements. she has never held Valin in such a way.#she gets a true sense for the fragility of organic matter. from where she is clamped on his wrist she swivels her electric eye to witness#the half of the wound she cannot close with her body.#found this in my drafts...#ask to tag.#injury
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I feel like I have come to a point with Tumblr that I need to make a post about the way they have handled (or rather, not handled) moderation. At approximately 3am on Saturday, February 11, 2023, my wife was informed that her Tumblr account had been terminated. This came with no other information. She was not given details as to why her account was terminated and the only recourse she had was to use the "contact support" form to ask why her account was terminated and ask for how she could restore it. As of today, Feb 21, 2023, she has heard back nothing from the moderation team, just an acknowledgement that her emails have been received. We are looking at 10 days with zero communication.
My wife's account was used for fandom, for political commentary, and to discuss queer issues. She was active for years, and should not have been flagged as a bot based on her activity. If she was reported or has broken a rule, we do not know what it could have been. If this could happen to her, it could happen to you, to anyone. She used her account as a primary way of connecting with others and its loss has been a serious blow to her mental health. I have written to support myself and received a response but it was simply to tell me that she should contact them, which she has already done.
It's clear that they are not responding to her for reason or reasons unknown, given the fact that I got a response in 24 hrs but she has gotten nothing at all in 10 days. There seems to be no way to contact the moderation team outside of the support form, which has been ineffective. I feel I have no recourse but to make this issue public. Again, if this could happen to my wife, it could happen to anyone. I am half expecting to be terminated just for writing this post. I am going to try to blaze this, but I doubt they will allow it. If you see it, could you pass it on?
Thank you!
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