#restaurant jokes

[jellyjamheadobb]

our lord and savior garlic bread

[zorionbbq]

party chat #56: nanba's transformation

(transcript both in alt text and below)

[image description: five-page comic of a "party chat" conversation from yakuza 7.

beneath the scaffolding of a construction site, nanba holds a bottle of tea and asks "hey, you think i've changed at all since we met?"

the rest of the party, standing or crouching on the side of the path, turn to look at him.

"hm? have you?" ichiban tilts his head, hand on chin, and lets saeko pick from his chip bag. "i dunno, lemme think..."

adachi leaps to his feet, splashing his can of beer and surprising saeko. "got it!"

adachi snaps his fingers with a triumphant smile. "you changed how you part your hair!"

"huh?" nanba reaches toward the back of his own head. "nope, it's still the same..." adachi sheds a single tear.

hand raised high, saeko announces "right! your prescription changed!" ichiban taps a canned coffee on his palm in an "i get it!" motion. "what, are you trying to be funny now!? and that's wrong, too!" nanba retorts.

"okay!" han looks serious. "you changed the frames on your glasses!"

"you started wearing contacts instead of glasses!" zhao finger-guns with a grin.

"will you quit it with the glasses thing!?" nanba snaps at an unfazed, juicebox-sipping han. "and does it look like i'm wearing contacts!?" he gestures at himself. zhao smugly bites an onigiri, still squatting on the ground.

adachi frowns around a pocky. "huh? then what's changed?"

"never mind... sheesh." nanba turns his back on the group.

a view of the vending machine and soccer field across the way. "i just thought maybe i'd grown a bit cheerier since i met you guys."

"that's all." nanba doesn't see the party staring in shocked silence.

saeko, han, and zhao exchange fond looks.

nanba chugs his tea as ichiban approaches.

ichiban bumps his drink hand against nanba's.

"well, we already knew that, man." ichiban grins so wide his eyes shut.

"yeah, you smile a lot more than you did before, nan-chan." saeko concurs, offering him her chip bag.

nanba looks up, eyes wide. "ichiban... you guys..."

a hand lands on nanba's shoulder.

arm slung over his friend's back, ichiban cheerfully assures "and i noticed that you got some new lenses on your glasses, too." nanba's face falls.

the party loses it. saeko collapses on adachi, both doubled over in laughter, zhao cackles as his glasses fall off, and han clutches his head in despair.

"i didn't change anything about my glasses!" nanba roars. on the ground, a plastic bag of leftover snacks reads "#56 nanba's transformation".

end image description]

[yellowtrinity]

dinner date turnabout

[sorreltail]

I REQUEST

Brightheart and cinderpelt laughing over something silly thornclaw or brackenfur did/said

i think cinderpelt is the funny one of their litter

[moeblob]

...and they were coworkers. (an actual conversation from my last job)

[spooksier]

im glad everybody is seeing the comedy inherent in my american tma au and how many goddamn roadtrips those patriots would have to take. america is huge guys, i take your 3 hour roadtrip to great yarmouth and raise you this

they’d kill each other in that car

[brunosaderogatory]

I feel like I’m going insane. Does anyone remember Luca? Does anyone like Luca still? I feel like a single Guinea pig in a petco cage. I’m starting to understand why hamsters seek out their death. You can only run on that wheel for so long before you start feeling a little bit crazy. Please tell me does anyone still like Luca.

[baaad-omens]

doing some research on parapsychology as a field. in short, it's the study of how the supernatural relates to psychology, and is largely regarded as pseudoscience with only a handful of people studying it, and very very few universities will even offer a parapsych program.

so… martin, buddy, did you just google 'what degrees do people get for paranormal research' and go with the first one that popped up? you did didn't you. idiot.

[46hasu]

A modern-day RobinHill AU where Boothill loses his family ranch to the modern day equivalent of IPC and has to move to the city with his adoptive daughter, who is a big fan of the singer Robin. And despite his daughters obsessive streaming of her songs and music videos, Boothill has no idea what Robin looks like except objectively pretty. So he has no clue that the vaguely familiar young lady that he keeps running into with the large sunglasses and face mask is the famous idol and whoops he developed a crush on her

[hyohaehyuk]

gruntsandpoetry and pixielayer: Sam: "(trying to give the most PR-ish answear as possible about chemistry) "it's a team effort" Rolin: "JACOB AND SAM GO BOWLING TOGETHER" Assad: "And ice cream" Sam: "We eat a lot of ice cream and… we do a lot of sticker play…" Host: “care to elaborate on sticker play?” 🤯 Sam: "make it up" 💀

Source: Den of Geek - Will Claudia Have to Claw Her Way Back into 'Interview with the Vampire'? | SDCC

where are they sticking those stickers?

[cinamun]

Gotta pull up | Next

Lot Credit by the fabulous simkoos!

[phregnancy]

italy

captions under cut

phil: i actually, i like ants touching my food. i wish there was more.

pj: you wish there were more ants touching your food?

phil: mmmmm

pj: oh god, sounds awful

[lesbianfakir]

The ONLY romantic fakiru dynamic I will accept is fakir fighting for his life to bring a duck into a fancy restaurant so they can have a nice anniversary dinner

[abastardworthknowing]

‘“‘“I want Crowley to yell at Aziraphale!”’”’

‘“‘“I want Aziraphale to yell at Crowley!’”’’”

I want them to yell at each other then kiss sloppy style

[c00kietin]

as I said before, I am drawing me with the characters you shipped me with. . .

Starting with @bram-appreciation-blog's Chuck E. Cheese :D

[jadeestebanestrada]

I'm just here for the Chinese food, miss.