#respect nonbinary people

[fairyd0g]

All those words to say you're a woman?

what words have I said to indicate that I'm a woman. pretty sure it was none cause I'm not lol.

[uncanny-tranny]

You know, I'm not a cheerleader for cis people who get gender-affirming care (especially if it's "gender nonconforming," such as a cis guy who gets vaginoplasty) because I think cis people are superior or that they should be coddled, but rather, because I don't want people to respect my gender-related care simply because I'm trans. I want people to respect my bodily autonomy because... I'm a human person. It sometimes feels like people want you to prove that they should respect your bodily autonomy, and that's something I fundamentally despise.

I shouldn't need to be open about my transness in order to be respected because... that's not information you're inherently privileged to, nor are you entitled to somebody's transness/gender situation in general. I prefer that we start seeing gender care as something that isn't "for" one group of people when that's not how the world will work, y'know. There will always be people who seek specific care no matter what or who they are, because they're human people who can make decisions.

[ugly-anarchist]

I think there needs to be some kind of bridge between "do what you want forever, labels are made for you not the other way around" and "these labels mean something and the community around them might get hurt if you don't treat them with respect and also some specific experiences deserve their own specific labels"

Like, I get wanting to be accepting of everyone but at the same time treating queer labels like they actually mean nothing and anyone who tries to say "oh hey maybe don't do that" is just a cop who wants to exclude people isn't great.

Like obviously exclusionism is bad and people who just hate anyone who isn't like them shouldn't have their opinion respected but at the same time it's like... These words are important and the people being like "they're just words who cares" clearly don't respect the history and community effort put into them.

[popcornoncemore]

One of the things I just adore about the fannon portrayal of Jehan Prouvaire is how most people depict him as effeminate or nonbinary, somewhat introverted, shy, and disinclined to aggression, but they do so with nuance.

Jehan isn't shown to be defenseless or weak-willed, he fights for what he believes in and generally doesn't fall into that delicate twink stereotype. So often, I find the characters I relate to most cannot be shown as both the queer, eccentric, and introverted type as well as the assertive and strong character. Jehan stands out, however.

[lgbtqtext]

[annabelle--cane]

madam e, lying down in the tattoo chair as ink5oul holds her down and causes her unspeakable pain: I think I hauve covid

[lgbtq-userboxes]

[astralleywright]

and if i said that part of the reason a lot of ppl aren't as into C3 is because of the dearth of truly mass appeal M/M options.

[hiimcanadia]

Oh, I learned about a new thing at the summit this weekend and I'm curious about other trans people's opinions on it!

A therapist who spoke mentioned that some parts of the community & medical field are pushing to use the term "blending" as an alternative to "passing." The explanation given was that "passing" has the implication that there is one ideal way to be a certain gender and that trans people should/ are pressured to work towards that ideal, while "blending" acknowledges that there are multiple ways of presenting that will still allow you to blend in with the general population.

He'd apparently learned this term from practitioners in the West Coast area, but none of us in the Midwest had ever heard it and we had a very interesting conversation about it! So I'd love to know if anyone else from the community has heard this before and what your takes are!

[silliestcreature196]

Here's a reminder to love EVERY trans person in your life. Yes, even "those ones". ESPECIALLY "those ones".

Do not make "others" out of your peers.

Boys who don't bind deserve your love.

Girls who don't shave deserve your love.

Enbies who don't present perfect androgyny deserve your love.

Anyone who doesn't actually go on HRT deserves your love.

Folks that don't voice train deserve your love.

Love them, while they're still here. Don't lose them. Cherish them. And by God, if you compare any mildly-chubby trans girl with messy hair to Chris Chan I will fucking crucify you on the evening news.

[legalownerofufoemoji]

Hi your friendly neighborhood Satt/Tee/直斗 here, this is your yearly pride announcement that both "not all intersex people are queer inherently" and "an intersex person calling themselves queer means they are queer even if you don't understand" are both true statements at the same time! And if you don't respect ALL types of intersex people and include them in your fight for equal rights, get the fuck off my blog, thanks!

[uncanny-tranny]

With how dangerous binding and tucking can be, it's wild to me that in so many ways, the onus of having your basic humanity respected often hinges on ensuring that you do whatever you can to minimize your body. And it's extra wild when you're told how nobody will respect you, but I have had plenty of interactions with (just to name a couple of examples) men who don't bind and women who don't pack, and it's actually so easy to engage with them without laser-focusing on their body.

I was always told that respect hinges on earning it - a trans person earns respect (see: people almost begrudgingly seeing and/or affirming who they are) when we prove ourselves. As a kid, I didn't have the financial or familial support to bind, so I used bandages. Like, I remember leaving class to take them off because I was in so much pain, and it just makes me think that there is a whole lot of difference between the workloads of trans people and certain others. I don't think putting my body in physical risk like that is the same mental and physical workload as... using a name, using pronouns, seeing the person and who they are.

[proudfreakmetarusonikku]

sorry just every day i think about how people not only use “transmasc” and “transfem” as a new rigid gender identity but also a sex binary where if you’re a Vagina Haver and trans you’re automatically transmasc and if you’re a Penis Haver and trans you’re automatically transfem and if you don’t fit neatly into that I guess you just don’t exist or something bc people forget intersex people exist even more than nonbinary people yet steal their language 🙄

like, bro. male and female, or even “masculine” and “feminine” are not the only options. you can be both male and female. you can be a third gender. you can be neither. as long as you have very rigid sex and gender binaries like that you’re inherently explicitly excluding any nonbinary or intersex person who doesn’t fit into your extremely narrow view of what being trans is

[tethered-heartstrings]

to be honest, volunteering my preferred pronouns for the student roster/grading platform (it's attached to my name and face and supposedly all faculty look at it), having it nearly the size of my name on my required nametag, and at each new-group introduction (being brave when no one else volunteers their own) and still being misgendered multiple times a day every day at least 5 days a week, like it feels like I might as well just wear clown make-up at this point

[yuridovewing]

i understand the frustration with “i made this gay pairing cis x trans so they can still have biological babies” with no thought to other methods and how ppl assume thats the case when it comes to mothpool aus where mothwing is also the mother of the three, but also…. idk i kinda dont give a shit if someone wants to do that and i dont really think its inherently transphobic as long as its handled with care and respect.

what really concerns me about this debate is how some people are adamant that you cannot portray trans people having biological children in media or youre being disrespectful. and im gonna say as a nonbinary person who doesnt want children for themself- thats kinda fucking weird? like i understand that for some people, theyre trans themselves and theyre speaking from a place of dysphoria, and i absolutely get that, which is why i think the topic should be handled with nuance and diversity in trans characters, but like…. guys. pregnant trans men exist irl. trans women get people pregnant irl. trans ppl’s ability and right to parent and have biological children are being debated irl. we get denied the opportunity to adopt as well.

in a climate like this, are we SURE we want the stance on rewrites and headcanons in the silly cat books to be “if you portray trans characters having children, especially with a gay couple, youre a transphobic freak no matter what!” does it really matter? especially if its being done by a trans person handling the topic with nuance who has a lot of trans characters with varying perspectives?

obviously yes, remember that thats not the only way certain gay couples can have kids, remember that not every trans person is fully comfortable with it and keep that in mind, remember that surrogacy and adoption are also perfectly valid ways to give fan babies- but remember that there are OPTIONS. not that you need to condemn the idea of transgender parents in the first place unless they fit the very specific criteria of “proper transgender representation” and anything that dares deviate from that is proof the op is a transphobic monster (bonus points if theyre a trans creator bc i mostly see trans people getting shit for this and it kinda pisses me off. although idm if cis people do it either as long as theyre handling it with respect)

[salamander-crimes]

"look at this made-up nonbinary person's cringe special snowflake gender! I bet they identify as an attack helicopter lol. how embarrassing! ...and we have to respect that!" come on now.