#red sunglasses are magic and also look cool as hell A+ no notes

[haledamage]

I have been fighting a migraine for almost three weeks now, one that has been resistant to all of my meds

but this morning I decided to put on my red sunglasses instead of the normal black ones, and my headache??? went away?? IMMEDIATELY

the better part of a month in pain and it was fixed because I wanted to wear my spooky aesthetic sunglasses. what the fuck

[therainroguefanfiction]

☁ Drifting Away (Giotto) #01

📑 Table of Contents

Genre: Angst, Mystery, Comedy, AU, Fluff, Family

Word Count: 1,385

Pairing: Reader x Giotto/Vongola Primo

World: Katekyo Hitman Reborn!

Author’s Note: I don’t speak Italian, so I trusted google translate to help me out here. Hopefully it’s not too far off lol This is another series I started a long time ago that I don’t know if I will finish, but here ya go haha

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☁ Abyss ✗ Meeting ✗ Shock ☁

It was dark. Pitch black with no source of light. There was no sound, like the world had been put on mute. A black abyss of the mind and heart. You tried calling out only to find that you had lost your voice. Your eyes refused to adjust to the darkness surrounding you and your body felt as if it were floating inside a black hole. Had your eyes been blindfolded? Your ears plugged?

‘What the hell is happening?’, you wondered.

With a groan, your eyes slowly slid open, moving in and out of focus. The darkness began to fade and sound slowly reached your ears. Sitting up, your eyes blinked rapidly to adjust to the bright sun that was beaming down onto your body. The heat seeped through your hoodie and the scorching pavement your body sat on seeped through your jeans.

After your eyes finally adjusted, you stood up and took in your surroundings.

A cobblestone path was what lay beneath you. The street was alive with the chatter of passersby. You weren’t sure if it was you or just your mind on overdrive but you couldn’t understand a single word that left their mouths. It was a foreign language, one that seemed familiar yet you couldn’t give it a name.

Everything was laid out in a sepia tone, like in those old-timey movies, from the buildings to the sky, the ground and the trees and even the people. This made you blink rapidly and rub your eyes with the palm of your hand. Slowly, the sepia tone began to fade just as the darkness had and the color returned.

This was no Namimori.

Where were you? And more importantly, how the hell’d you get there?

You pulled yourself to your feet, feeling like a ghost. Not a single person looked in your direction. You expected some strange looks at the way you were dressed, so differently from them, but you didn’t even get that – it was like you weren’t even there. Did they ignore you because of the way you were dressed? Or could they really not see you?

Anxiety rushed over you, but you bit it back.

Shaking your head, you took off walking. You had no clue where you were going but anything was better than just standing there like a moron. The headache you had was finally beginning to fade, reduced from a stabbing pain to a lighter, numb pain. You let your feet guide you, pulling you away from the crowded street and into a dark and deserted alleyway.

You needed to gather your thoughts and figure out what was going on and in order to do that, you needed someplace quiet where you could be alone. The alley was the perfect place for that.

You didn’t know how long you had walked for but you were brought roughly from your swirling thoughts by a loud scream aimed toward you. “Hey! Voi!” A black-clad man appeared before you, grabbing tightly onto your arm.

“Dove lo pensate state andando?” Another black clad man appeared behind you, gripping your other arm.

“State venendo con noi.” They chorused.

So much for being alone. What the hell were they saying? You didn’t even know what language it was but it was making your headache worsen. You glared at the two men before reaching your foot up and kicking the first male in the side. He let out a grunt of pain, his hand releasing your arm. You then bent down, slamming your elbow into the second male’s stomach. He also released you and you turned around to run off.

Before you had the chance, the now recovered male number one re-grabbed your arm, twisting it behind your back and holding a gun to the side of your head. The second male grabbed your free arm and did the same as the first before binding your wrists tightly. If it didn’t bruise, you’d be thoroughly surprised. Not that you cared about that at that moment.

Your suspicions of the two men who dragged you roughly through several different alleyways were that they were Mafioso. Either that or they were men in black and thought you were an alien – which honestly wouldn’t surprise you, considering how out of place you felt. The latter seemed a lot less likely, though.

Your suspicions were proven correct when they dragged you into a large mansion-like building, whose halls were filled with black-clad men and women. Option three just made itself known inside your head. Maybe they were part of some cult and used magic to summon you, like England from Hetalia.

The two men roughly dragged you through the winding halls of the three-story home until you reached a set of large oak doors. Man number one knocked, waiting.

“Entra,” came a smooth, male voice.

The men opened the door and dragged you inside.

The man who sat behind the desk looked up as you entered the room, being pushed to stand a foot or so in front of said desk. Man number two didn’t miss the glare you sent him, causing his grip on your arm to tighten to a painful degree. The man behind the desk had golden blonde hair set in a spikey fashion, while his soft orbs were a mix of red and orange. His blonde locks fell into his face, but the strict expression wasn’t blocked by them.

“Boss, we found this suspicious-looking kid snooping around,” Man number one announced, his grip tightening to the same degree as his partner.

‘Asshole,’ you cursed. ‘Wait, these fucks can speak English?!’ “I was not snooping around, you prick!” you growled in response, glaring at the man on your left. “And I ain’t no kid.”

“Quiet,” he hissed, glaring at you through his black sunglasses.

“Che. Don’t tell me what to do, baldy. And who the fuck wears sunglasses indoors? You tryin’ to be cool or somethin’? ‘Cause it ain’t working, let me tell you.”

“Why you – !”

“I see,” the man behind the desk cut the bald man off, his elbows on the desk and his hands folded to cover his mouth. “You can both leave. I’d like to speak to our guest alone.” The blonde’s voice was soft, but the demand was easily detected. His deep voice flowed like honey and the deep accent was clear when he spoke.

‘He looks so familiar, I feel like I should know who this man is. Damn, Reborn was right. I really don’t pay enough attention to things,’ you scowled at the carpet below you. His accent was familiar as well, but you just couldn’t place it.

“But Boss – !” Man number two tried to protest, but quickly shut his mouth when his boss held his hand up, a clear sign that his mind would not change; it was not up for discussion.

With reluctance and a few dirty glares aimed at you, the two untied your wrists and left the office. Before the door closed, you caught the crest on their suit jackets. You hadn’t noticed it before. Your eyes widened in shock.

‘That’s the Vongola crest… They called this man the boss but… he’s not the ninth and he sure as hell ain’t Tsuna,’ your gaze returned to the blonde before you, narrowed in confusion and suspicion.

“My name is Giotto,” he introduced softly, watching your expression change from confusion to disbelief. As soon as you heard his name, an image of said blonde appeared in your mind. Things clicked into place and you finally remembered who he was.

“Giotto… Vongola Primo?!” ‘What in the hell is going on…?’

“You’ve heard of me?” he questioned, his eyes shining with traces of curiosity. He found himself feeling confused. You seemed like a normal young adult, so how did you know about him? Why did you know about the Vongola? Were you an enemy?

“This isn’t happening,” you muttered, backing away slowly. “There’s no fucking way…” you turned quickly, pulling the large doors open and stealthily dodging the guards before jumping out a nearby window. You stumbled slightly when your feet hit the ground from the strong impact, but quickly regained your balance and took off. ‘Who knew all that training with Reborn would help me successfully jump out of a three-story window mostly unscathed?’

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▸Next

📜 Read more by checking out my masterlist 📜

[jungshookz]

baby, you can drive my car |(mechanic!yoongi)

→ pairing: min yoongi x reader 

→ genre: mechanic!au, spoiltbrat!y/n (++ inexperienced y/n as hiGHLy requested hehe), 6 greasy bois, a taste of richboy!jin, a vintage mercedes benz named beeper, usual dose of crackheadiness, touch of angst, sprinkle of fluff, and bts (big time smut) ((i love recycling this joke don’t come for me)) (((thigh-riding)))

→ trigger warning: there is a brief mention of blood so tread lightly if you feel queaSy about that! 

→ wordcount: 24.6k magic in the air 

→ summary: welcome to min mechanics - what can i do for you today, doll?

→ note: ooh BOY this took me a while! i’m sorry it took me so long to publish this but i hope this bad boy (i’m talking about the fic itself anD mechanic!yoongi) makes up for it! mechanic!yoongi has been in the works for a while... thank you to every single one of you who contributed each of your own lil ideas and helped to create the chArming tattoo-sleeve man we all fuLLY fell in love with. seriously y’all i could not have done this without you!! i ain’t gon lie i was going to post this on the day of the comeback but i think i needed a day to just.,.,, SCREAM and listen to the album.,.,,.  (and also i was still editing it yikes) ((and also what do u guys think of the new albUM hELLO)) so here it is twO days after the comeback!!!!!!! i hope i gave you sufficient time to recover from the new album but if not oH well what can ya do!!! also i’m really friCkin nervous for some reason but nonetheless enjoy the ride! ( 灬♥ 3 ♥灬)

pst if u wanna talk to y/n or yoongi u know what to do ;-)

(gif isn’t mine!)

(((and the read more function iS there but most of the time it doesn’t work on mobile :// i am sorry don’t attack me by sending passive-aggressive anon messages)))

you know what

you could totally get used to this being an adult thing

you finally get to live in your own place

you finally get to eat whatever the heck you wanna eat

and most importantly

you finally get a car

yes, you’ll admit, you’re a little behind with the whole car thing

most of your friends already got their licenses befoRe becoming adults but so what if you were a little slow!!! you were just living life as a teenager!!!! there was no rush

let’s not beat around the bush here

you are: a spoilt brat

like unbelievably so

when you were younger all you’d have to do is point at something and your parents would immediately be like ….aight

now that you’re older it’s kinda the same except they’ve just given you a bunch of credit cards so now you don’t have to ask anyone you can just go out and get it yourself

but this car

this sweet sweet car that belongs to you

(to be moRe specific it’s a 1962 mercedes benz baby blue convertible that you’ve affectionately named beeper)

((you knoW that shit be fancy when it’s from the dang 60s))

this is the first BIG purchase you’ve made and you’re feeling pretty proud of yourself anD you’re feeling extra adult-y  

anyways you’re heading back to your penthouse now because it’s been a busy day!!

you had class in the morning and then you went and got your nails done to reward yourself for going to class (a manicure anD a pedicure because why would you not do your toes if you’re doing your fingers that just wouldn’t be fair to your toes) and then you went and got a venti coffee frappucino from starbucks

you reach over and adjust the front mirror a bit and take a second to admire your brand new YSL heart-shaped sunglasses (they’re SO cute n u have them in three different colours)

you’re already thinking about what you want for dinner

maybe you can order some sushi or something

you could go for a dynamite roll or something

maybe some gyoza dumplings too

oOh you should also get some seaweed salad because that-

prrt prruT prrt prRRrRRRRRrr

oh my god

no way

“oh my god, no way.” your heart drops to your stomach when beeper starts sputtering and coughing and slowing d o w n

oh god

oh god oh god oh god

okay

it’s fine

it’s fine don’t worry about it

thankfully beeper stopped riGht as the light turned red so you have some time to try and get him up and running again

okay

what can you do

what does this button do

click

oH okay those are the windshield wipers and you don’t need those

you twist a knob and curse to yourself when the radio turns on

ok what about thiS knob

“chRist-“ cold air starts blasting riGht into your face and you turn the knob back down

you step down on the gas pedal and nothing happens

what do you do whAT do you DO

you probably have like 20 seconds left before the light turns green and you have to get going

ooooOOOoOh you don’t want the people behind you to honk at you

that’s going to stress you out

you don’t want to be honked at!!!!!!!!!

usually when something bad happens you just.,. throw some money on it and it goes away

in this case you can technically throw money at it

let’s rephrase this

usually when something bad happens you just throw some money at a person and it goes away because they take care of the problem foR you

but the difference here is that you are all alone

in this big city

and your parents are miles away

and no one is here to help you

ooh!!!! ooh!!!!!! google a car repair shop!!!! goOGLE IT

you reach into your purse and pull your phone out quickly

“car repair shops near me…” you mutter to yourself as you type into the google search bar

you jump in surprise when the car behind you honks at you and you give them a sheepish smile and a shrug

“c’mon, c’mon.,.,,” you smack the steering wheel in frustration but quickly rub over the wheel apologetically  

beeper coughs before jerking and you feel a wave of relief wash over you when it starts moving again

okay

according to google maps the nearest repair shop is a minute drive away

okay okay okay

should be doable

it appears that the gods are somewhat on your side today because beeper breaks down officially right as you drive up to the front of the repair shop

luckily no one was on the sidewalk when you nyOomed up because half of your car is on the sidewalk and the other half is on the street and you’re not looking to run anyone over today

“stupid car.” you mutter as you slam the door shut “…sorry buddy.” you wince apologetically and pat the hood because you certainly wouldn’t want to be spoken to like that if you were a car

you look up at the rusting sign hanging above the large garage

‘min mechanics’

“min mechanics.” you stand in front of the large open garage and inspect the inside

is this place good enough for beeper

it seems like it’s doing pretty well

there are at least eight cars all parked on either sides of the place

in the very back in the left corner there’s an office kinda thing  

there’s a sign hanging on top of the door that says ‘front desk’

okay so that seems like a logical place to go to

you’re a little wary just leaving your car out here with nobody to watch it but it’s not like you have a choice

you walk in further and adjust your purse strap on your shoulder

what heCk

there’s like nobody here

there better be somebody here otherwise you’re going to get your dad to sue

just kidding

but not really

“uh, hellOOooOOo??” your boots clack against the concrete as you walk deeper into the garage

you push your sunglasses up onto the top of your head before placing a hand on your hip

“is anybody here??? someone needs to fix my car, please!!!” you approach the truck that’s just sitting in the middle of the garage and that’s when you notice a pair of legs under the truck

oh my god

someone’s been CRUSHED By a TRUCK

oh HELL no you are getting out of here you’re going to pretend like you weren’t even here in the first place

“sorry, gimme a sec!” the legs twitch and you let out a breath of relief

whoever this person is rolls out from under the truck smoothly and gets up onto their feet

oh

hello

he wipes his cheek with the back of his hand and gets grease smudged over his cheekbone with a scowl before wiping his grubby hands on his rag

soft icy-blue hair  

almost cat-like eyes

sharp jawline

very pretty hands

he tosses the dirty rag over his shoulder and you definitely don’t miss the way his bicep flexes

you glance down at the name embroidered in yellow thread into the chest pocket of his navy blue jumpsuit

𝓎𝑜𝑜𝓃𝑔𝒾

cute name for a cuter boy

he looks up at you and falters a bit

obviously he’s a liTTle taken aback because what’s a girl like you doing at a place like this??

you don’t miss the way his eyes scan over your figure

a cream coloured blouse tucked into a pair of skinny blue jeans

a pair of chunky leather boots that look like they cost more than his entire life

the little gucci purse

and of course

the heart shaped sunglasses

hm

“what can i help you with, doll?” he offers you a smirk and a tilt of the head and suddenly you think you’ve forgotten how to breathe

you don’t think that pet name should affect you as much as it does

holy shiT this is one pretty boy

he pushes his sleeves up and that’S when you notice that one of his arms is covered with tattoos

holy moly

“i… car’s broken. my car. my car’s broken.” you stumble over your words

“you… car’s broken, huh?” he teases before glancing over your shoulder “is that it outside?”

you nod quickly and look back at your car

aw

poor beeper

you didn’t even get to drive him that much and he already diED on you

you should’ve asked for a range rover instead

once again it’s from the 60s

you probably should’ve stopped right then and there

but it’s so cute!!!!!!!

“is that a 1962 mercerdes benz??” ‘yoongi’ gasps and moves past you towards beeper “holy shiT i’ve only seen those in pictures”

“it’s pretty cool, i guess.” you shrug casually and watch as he continues to marvel over your car “but yeah, do you think you can fix him?”

“him?”

“…his name is beeper.” you admit shyly and yoongi laughs lightly and nods understandably

“cute. and yes, i’ll take care of beeper for you, don’t worry. give me some time to poke around and see what the issue is.” he pats beeper’s hood before gesturing over to the back of the garage “you can chill out in the office if you want, or there’s a starbucks down the street. it’s pretty muggy in the garage and i wouldn’t want you to scuff up your gucci purse.”

his eyes flicker towards the little black bag nestled against your side

you clear your throat and tuck it behind you bashfully

“i’m yoongi, by the way.” he sticks his hand out and you look down at it

you can see some greASy residue from the truck that he was fixing earlier but you tell yourself to man up and you reach over and take his hand

oh my god his hand is s t i c k y

ew!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

“i’m y/n. thank you for helping me out.”

“of course, i’m happy to help.” yoongi offers you a boyish smile and you decide right then and there that you don’t mind his sticky hands at all

the bell tinkles lightly as you push the frosted glass door open and step into the air-conditioned office

hey the office is a lot bigger than you thought it’d be

and definitely a lot nicer than you thought it’d be (no offence)

there’s a front counter and an empty wheely chair behind it

oH and there’s another door that leads into a more ~private~ office but it’s closed so you can’t sneak a peek inside

on the counter there’s a little bell and next to it is a hEfty jar of lollipops

behind the counter is a cork board with a bunch of car keys hanging from pushpins all lined up in a neat row

a couple sticky notes pinned up

four plastic chairs sitting on the side (you’re assuming this is the waiting area)

in the corner there’s a little table with a stack of magazines

and in the other corner there’s a water dispenser

the ceiling fan whirs above you as you head over to the front desk

these lollipops look tempting

you wonder if they’re complimentary or if yoongi is just a sugar addict

you reach into the jar and grab one quickly and drop it into your purse

the chair squeaks underneath you as you take a seat and you shift to get comfortable

you reach up to push your sunglasses up because they start to slide down a little

a breath slips past your lips

you wonder how long yoongi’s going to take

and then you wonder if you’re going to have to get a new car

maybe you should go car shopping after this

hot tip: avoid cars from the 60s

“well i figured out what was wrong with your car” you jump when the door opens abruptly

you stand up from the seat and smooth your blouse down a little “what’s wrong with it?? what do i need to get fixed and how much is it all going to cost??”

“uh, not that much consider what was wrong was that the gas tank was empty.”

…

oh

my

god

you’re a moron

you are an idiot

a F O O L

you clear your throat and feel your cheeks starting to burn a lil

this is uh

this is kinda embarrassing

“are you… sure? that’s it? the gas tank was empty? there’s really nothing else wrong with him?”

“mhm.” yoongi nods and makes his way over behind the front desk “i did a full body check on beeper and everything else is working just fine! he just needed a tank of juice, so i filled up for you. he’s good to go!” he unwraps a lollipop and sticks it into his mouth  

“oh, okay. um-“ you unzip your purse and rifle through it for your wallet “how much do i owe you?”

“nothing”

“noth- gas is free???? holy shit. i did not know that.” you scoff in surprise and put your wallet away

yoongi’s brows furrow and he gives you a smile “no, gas isn’t free, doll. i’m giving you a get outta jail free card, so next time beeper ‘breaks down’ you’ll know he’s just out of gas.”

“oh… oH no no you don’t have to do that here lemme give you-“

“hey, seriously - it’s fine.” yoongi hands you your keys back before spinning you around and leading you out the door with a hand placed on the small of your back  

“but-“

“but nothing! i don’t wanna hear it.” he teases as he opens the door up for you and nudges you inside

he closes the door gently and bends down a little “it was nice doin’ business with you. take care of yourself now.”

“thanks for making me look like a fool in front of a cute boy today, beeper.” you sigh as you step out of the car and close the door

beep beep !

you drop your keys into your purse after locking beeper up and you make your way over to the elevator that goes up to the penthouse

as you wait for the elevator to take you up to your floor you shove your hand into your purse for your house keys and you end up pulling out

a yellow lollipop

you stare at it for a second and blink at it owlishly

no

y/n

he’s a mechanic

your dad’s a businessman!!!!!!!!!  

you need to go after a CEO boy not a CAR boy

you’re sure there are plenty of nice CEO boys in the city

you unwrap the lollipop and stick it into your mouth

hm

mango!

the elevator dings and the doors slide open

you step out into the hallway and twirl your keys around your finger

yeah

it’d be good for you

just forget about the silly car boy

three days later

ok so listen

uh

you know how you said it’d be good to just forget about the silly car boy

ya

that did not happen

you don’t usually do stupid things

but this?

this thing that you have just done??

now THIS was stupid

you might’ve maybe kinda sorta possibly clobbered one of your side mirrors with a baseball bat so that it’d break off because a teeny weeny (huge huGe) part of you wanted to see yoongi again

after the whole stare off with the lollipop in the elevator you just had this itching feeling all over your body

there’s just something about him and you can’t quite put your finger on it

maybe it’s because he’s so..,,.,,., cool? like that’s the only word you have to describe him right now lol

he’s just.,.,,.., he’s so different compared to all the other boys you’ve ever been interested in

god

he’s such a man that’s what he is

the bad boy of your wildest dreams

anyways uh

“….oh boy.” so now you have a baseball bat in one hand and a side mirror in the other

if someone were to walk into the garage right now it’d look like you just damaged someone else’s car

and it’s not like you can say ‘oh, don’t worry! it’s just my car, trust me!!!’ and wave the baseball at them because then they’d be like wtf why did u just fuck up ur own car

well

now it’s too late

you gosh darn wrecked your vintage car all because you want to see a cute mechanic

you couldn’t have just walked in there like a normal person to say hi!!!!!

you could’ve gone in there with an envelope of money and been like oh i just felt bad about not paying so i hAd to come and pay you back!!!

you did this on purpose because you wanted! to! see! yoongi! again!

and unsurprisingly

you always get what you want

“how did this happen again?”

“…i backed up into my garage all weird…?” you’re not being very convincing right now in case that wasn’t already super obvious  

“…huh.”

see

yoongi knows his cars

he’s been working with them for a long time (fun fact he picked up his first screwdriver and helped his dad in the shop when he was just three years old!!!!)

and this doesn’t look like you backed your car into the garage and accidentally knocked it into the side of a wall

it looks like it’s been battered

and he can’t help but think that you were the one who fucked your car up

because there’s a huge dent on the top part of it (he’s assuming this was your first hit) and a loT of mini dents around it (which was a result of you panicking when it didn’t fall off the first time so you continued whacking it everywhere) anD the way the mirror cracked suggests that something was hitting it straIGHt on

so you must’ve been parking your car really weirdly if you actually knocked it off while parking

this looks like it was done purposely

yoongi looks up from the mirror at you

“so… can you fix it?”

a little smirk twitches at the corner of his mouth

alright

he’ll bite

“i mean, it would’ve been easier if the mirror wasn’t completely destroyed-” yoongi holds it up and you wince a little at the sight of the wires dangling from where you riPPed it off “i’m going to have to order a new mirror - it’s probably going to cost a pretty penny considering this is a vintage car, but i’ll be sure to find the best deal for you.”

“you’re welcome to leave beeper here oR you can always just bring him back when the mirror comes in because everything else is working perfectly fine.”

“i’ll leave him here-!” you respond immediately “…if that’s okay with you, of course.”

“that’s perfectly fine with me.” he holds his hand out and your eyes flicker down to it

even his hand is pretty

you’re not..,. sure why he’s holding his hand out

is he trying to shake your hand??

you slowly raise your hand before gently placing it over his

yoongi blinks twice and looks back up at you

you look back at him

“…i need your keys.”

OH

oH MY GOD

oh my god

“i knew that!” you rIP your hand away before shoving it into your purse

your face is honestly probably on fire right now

love that for you

you drop your keys into yoongi’s palm with a jingle and yoongi smirks because now it seems like you’re avoiding eye contact with him

he smirks lightly as he tucks your keys into his back pocket

“at least buy me dinner first before touching me like that, doll.”

ok

you need to leave NOW

this is MORTIFyiNG

you are in the midst of an internal conflict

see, the thing is

you’re not quite sure if you’re crossing the line from charming to downright creepy

let’s unpack this

charming = treating someone to lunch

creepy = treating someone to lunch when you’ve only spoken to him for a total of like 3 minutes

charming = bringing lunch to someone at their workplace

creepy = bringing lunch to someone at their workplace and virtually giving them no choice but to sit down and eat lunch with you becausE you bROUGHt lunch to their woRKPLACE

charming = y/n y/l/n when she like someone

creepy = y/n y/l/n when she really really likes someone

charm-

oh!!!! a pair of legs under a truck!!!!!!!

you pick up the pace and head straIght for truck

“hey!” you knock twice against the side to get yoongi’s attention and you can’t help but bounce up on your toes a little in excitement

you look into the takeout bag to make sure nothing is leaking “i know the car isn’t ready yet but i just wanted to stop by and thank you for-“

“well hey to you too” you step back when you look down to see someone who definitely isn’t yoongi but is also juSt as pretty as yoongi

he takes his cap off and pushes his hair back before putting his hat on backwards

“you aren’t yoongi” you squeak out and wrinkle your nose “i’m so sorry, i thought you were someone else.”

“my name is jungkook bUT i’d be happy to be yoongi if you’d like” he gets up off the ground and wipes his hands on the back of his jumpsuit

he flashes you a charming smile and you feel a little overwheLmed

“get bACk to work you moron” you and the yoongi impoSter both look to the left and you smile excitedly when you see who it is “hello - again.” he teases “your car isn’t ready yet, if that’s what you’re here for.”

“i know, i’m not here for the car.” you blurt out and yoongi’s eyes widen slightly in surprise

he pokes his tongue into his cheek and raises a brow before smirking at you

“huh. i see. so what are you here for then?”

“i-“

“yoongi, aren’t you going to introduce us to the pretty lady?” you turn to look over your shoulder and you’re suddenly overwhelmed because there are one two three four five boys standing behind you like a floCK of pigeons

yoongi lets out a sigh

sometimes he wished he worked alone

you can’t help but think that this mechanics shop is just a cover up for some kind of cult

because uh

every single one of these boys are beautiful

taehyung is in charge of paint jobs and customisations

namjoon is in charge of office-related things like contracts and paperwork and finances and things along that line

hoseok takes care of washing cars

and jimin is an excellent polisher (he promised you you’d get beeper back nice and sparKly even though all you have to do is replace the side mirror)

and jungkook..,.,. kind of bounces everywhere (apparently he’s just working here for the summer so he doesn’t have a designated responsibility)

last you saw him he was under a truck and now he’s helping jimin with the buffing

“now that you know everybody- sorry about that, by the way - what brings you here today?”

“i brought you some lunch as a thank you for… giving me free gas.”  

huh

“oh! thank you so much, that’s very sweet of you.” yoongi smiles and rubs his hands together “i haven’t eaten lunch yet so you came at the riGht time!”

niCE

okay this is good

yoongi can’t help but wonder how much you spent on lunch because even the takeout bag itself looks hella fancy

le petit bistro

obviously it’s some french place

and most of the time french places are hella fancy

he suggested you guys eat in his office so that you’d have a liL more privacy (he knows for a fact that the moment you guys pull food out the others are going to swarm around you and ask to donate some bites to them) and also you probably don’t want to smell petrol while eating lunch lol

you went to go wash your hands so yoongi took the opportunity to sneak a glance at the receipt to confirm his suspicions

and needless to say

he is SHOOK

jesus christ

$45???? for a SANDWICH??? one single sandwich????

the water was $8????

what the hell

.,.,,.negative sides of capitalism

well now he can’t help but wonder how loaded you actually are

he’s not going to lie

it’s slightly intimidating to be around someone practically oozing with money

“-i wasn’t sure what kind of sandwiches you liked so i got a croque monsieur for you, i hope that’s okay!” yoongi drops the receipt back into the bag quickly and shifts in his seat as you step into the office

“oh no, that’s totally fine! i love..,. croc monsters.” he clears his throat “what did you get for yourself?”

“a pan bagnat.” you plop down next to him before reaching into the bag

a pain what now

a pain bandaid?????

what the hell kind of words are leaving your mouth right now lol

“remind me what a… ᶜʳᵒᶜ ᵐᵒⁿˢᵗᵉʳ is again?” yoongi takes the box from you and pops it open

it kinda just looks like a plain ol sandwich

.,.,is that a gold leaf on top of it

“it’s just a fanCy ham and cheese sandwich….also did u just call it a croc monster”

yoongi pauses

“….did u just call it a croc monster?” yoongi bites into the sandwich and-

oH mY GOD

if u weren’t in the room with him he’s positive he would’ve busted a nut

holy SHIT that is a good ham and cheese sandwich

his ham and cheese sandwiches neVer taste this good!!!!!!!

“you want a bite of mine?”

“what’s yours?”

“a pan bagnat.” yoongi contemplates this for a second before shrugging and leaning in for a bite but you quiCkly pull back

he raises a brow

did u change ur mind

“say it.”

say wat

“…thank you?”

“no, no. say it.”

“say what?”

“the name of the sandwich.” you smirk

oh NO

you are a sICk, twiSted individual

the thing is

he knows it’s pan bagnat

but he can’t saY pan bagnat

but he KNOWS it’s pAN BAGNAT OKAY

he knows that you pronounced it pahn ban-yay

so he too will pronounce it pahn ban-yay

he clears his throat

“…pain bandaid.”

o dear god

“okay, so you got that one because jungkook dared you to???” you giggle and trace your fingers over the oFFending tattoo

“yep. he kept saying i didn’t have the balls to do it and the next thing i know i’m sitting in a tattoo parlour getting an angry cookie tattooed on the inside of my bicep.” he snorts and jabs it “luckily i have a whole sLeeve of tattoos to distract from shooky.”

“you nAMed him??”

“jungkook did!!!”

you trail your eyes over the rest of his tattoos

your favourite so far (and it’s the biggest one) is of a cherry blossom tree

the way the branches and twigs wrap around his arms is just so beautiful and the baby pink of the cherry blossoms are just so!!! cute!!!!!!!

“how about your hair, then? unless you were born with a head of shockingly icy-blue hair.”

“well, i got drunk on my birthday. and then i woke up with bleached hair, which was traumatising, as you can probably imagine. i wasn’t a fan of completely whiTE hair so i just bought some dye from the drug store and it came out to be this soft blue-grey kinda colour.” yoongi crosses his eyes as he pinches a couple strands of hair in between his fingers

“i don’t know if i could ever do that to my hair.” you murmur and look at your own strands of hair “my scalp would probably die on me.”

“my scalp is already fuLLy dead, so i don’t really care anymore.”

“does that mean you’ll let me dye your hair neon green?”

“…we’ll have to talk about that one first.”

yoongi nearly shits himself when he realises he’s gone twO hours over his lunch break

omg

he has so much to do today he has to go back to work

even though he’s the boss and can take as many lunch breaks as he wants it doesn’t maTTer

“you got any plans for the rest of the day?” yoongi crumples his napkin up and shOots it into the bin

“not really!” you wipe your mouth and put the soiled napkin into the takeout box before putting thAt back into the takeout bag

“here, i’ll throw that out in the back for you.” yoongi picks the bag up and tucks his own box into it as well

“thank you- i dO have some work do to later but hey, you wouldn’t mind if i just hung out here, right?”

yoongi pauses on his way to the door and turns back to look at you

“you wanna hang out… here?” yoongi furrows his brows in confusion “like here-here?”

you shrug

“it just gets preTTy boring at the apartment when i’m all alone”

“well, uh, i guess i don’t see any problem with you hanging out here. i’m just going to be out there with the others, so let me know if you need anything”

??????

yoongi doesn’t usually have to play the role of a hOSt when his customers are around

“cool!!! i’ll trY not to burn anything down”

yoongi smiles to himself and shakes his head before leaving the office

hm

you are a very peculiar girl

and so it goes

you find yourself zipping straiGht to min mechanics as soon as you’re done with classes for the day (you don’t go everyday just because you feel like that’s kinDa creepy and very veRy clingy so you limit yourself to like three or four days a week)

luckily yoongi’s shop is only a 20 minute uber ride away (you were vEry tempted to buy a new car to take over beeper’s place for the time-being but you figured it’d be best to spend your money on things like… groceries??) so he’s not toO out of the way which is good!!!!!!

although you have a feeling that even if yoongi was 3 hours away you’d stiLL make the trip to see him

and although it seems like you’re just there to check up on beeper because yOu miSs hIm it’s fairly obvious you have a lil thing for yoongi

“hey, um, just outta curiosity - how old is yoongi?” you adjust on the stool and avoid jungkook’s gaze when he turns back to look at you

he glances over at yoongi “he just turned 26! he’s an old man” jungkook snorts and goes back to wiping down the windows

26

that’s.,.,.,. uh

that’s kinda hot

you cross your legs and prop an elbow up on your knee before propping your chin up on your palm and you let out a dreamy sigh

everyThing about yoongi is kinda hot

the way he rolls his sleeves up to expose his forearms when he’s about to get down and diRty gets your gears grinding

or when his tongue swipes over his bottom lip after he’s taken a swig of water

or how deep n rasPy is voice gets sometimes

not to mention his tattoo sleeve

you haven’t gotten a good look at it yet but you’re not complaining because it makes him fall into the bad boy category and you are a HOE for that

“i’m 22, by the way. much, much younger than yoongi.” jungkook points out and turns around to lean against the truck

“mm, that’s cool, kook.” you smile although your eyes are glued on a certain someone else  

jungkook snorts and rolls his eyes

maybe he should get a tattoo sleeve

“you know she’s staring at you again”

yoongi has to bite back a smile to keep himself from looking like a smitten schOOlgirl  “is she?” he asks casually and flips to the next page of the catalogue

he glances over his shoulder and sure enough you’re staring right at him

of course the moment you get caught you quickly look up and pretend like the ceiling fans whirring above are the most interesting things you’ve ever seen in your entire life

“she’s cute”

“i know” yoongi looks up and narrows his eyes at hoseok who is… stiLL staring at you

yoongi takes a step to the side so that he’s blocking hoseok’s line of sight “don’t you have a tire to change or something?”

hoseok immediately raises his hands in defense

“all i’m impLYing is that if you don’t do something soon i might have to hop on that and take her for a ride-” hoseok yelps when yoongi rolls up the catalogue and suddenly starts smacking him with it

“get baCK to work before i FIRE you”

“whatcha eating?” you glance up from your magazine when you become acutely aware that you are no longer alone due to the fact that there are three shadows blocking you from the sun

ah yes

the three amigos

jimin taehyung and lil ol jungkook

you know exactly what they want

you swallow your bite and use your chopsticks to gesture to the takeout box of sushi (it’s a dynamite roll (your fave!!!!) from this amazing sushi place called nori) sitting on the little table next to you “sushi.” you flip to the next page of the magazine

“what…. kind of sushi?”  

“dynamite roll.”

you hear them murmuring to each other and the only thing you manage to make out is a ‘u think she’ll let us try’

yeah

it is always a mistake to bring food here but for some reason you don’t listen to yourself and you always bring food here

and u know what maybe this is just because ur kind of selfish (especially when it comes to the dynamite rolls from nori) but u don’t really want to give them a bite but at the same time you know for sure they’re not going to leave you alone til you let them try

“cool, cool.” taehyung clears his throat

you give them all an unimpressed look before snorting in amusement and picking up the takeout box then holding it up for them

“one piece each.”

and the gates of hell swing open

he immEdiately opens his mouth and sucks it in like a vacuum cleaner

and then you offer a piece to jimin

and then you offer a piece to jungkook

and once they’re all satisfied they finally leave you alone

now you’re down 3 pieces of sushi but it’s finE

you don’t think of yourself as a person who puts effort into things unless you’re parTicularly passionate about something

and you just so happen to be vERY passionate about (1) min yoongi so you surprise yourself when you realise that instead of spending thursday evening watching netflix, you spend three hours doing research on the different parts of a car juSt so you can go into min mechanics and blow yoongi’s MIND

u want to impress him ok it’s not a big deal!!!!!!!!

anyways

you have a couple bullet points that you scribbled down on your palm jUSt in case

you are READY to impress the heck out of yoongi

“that radiator sure looks busted, huh?” you peek over yoongi’s shoulder and take a step back when he turns to look at you “you should probably check the coolant levels.”

yoongi furrows his brows in confusion

what is happening

it doesn’t make sense that you suddenly have a very vAst knowledge of cars considering the fact that you thought your car was broken when it was literally just out of gas

.,.,.,what is going on

“that is the radiator, you’re correct. and it is busted.” you smile proudly and give yourself a mental pat on the back and it is pretty busted. “there’s a blown fuse and a couple of wires are corroded.”

“have you checked the lower radiator tank?”

“uh- yes, i checked that. i don’t really need to check the lower tank if i’m looking at an electrical problem though.”

uh oh

we’re starting to go downhill

quICK say something else

you unfurl your fingers and glance down at the messy scribbles on your palm (the ink is starting to bleed because ur starting to get nErvous and your palms always get clammy)

“how about the coolant?”

“don’t need to check coolant levels either.” yoongi hums and reaches over to untwist the tank cap “and you already mentioned the coolant levels earlier-“

and then it hits him

it finally hits him

his fingers freeze on the cap momentarily

oh

bless your heart

he pressed his lips together to keep himself from smiling too widely “-but if it makes you feel any better i’ll check the coolant levels again?”

“no, no! if you don’t need to check it, then you don’t have to.” you clear your throat “the… the fan clutch is… you should check that too. the fan clutch is… it’s a vital part of the radiator.”

“say, i have a question for you.” yoongi spins around and leans back against the car

“mhm?”

“what exactly does the radiator do, y/n?” he raises a brow before crossing his arms

you know this

oh my god you KNOW this

you literally read a 12 page document talking specifically about radiators HOW the hell are you BLANKING right now

okay fine

just play it cool

if you act like you know what you’re talking about it’ll be more convincing

“it…” you kiss your teeth before glancing down at the radIatoR “it… radiates… um, it radiates energy so that the car is able to… move.” you explain as conFidently as you possibly

“and what’s a fan clutch?”

“oh! you know, it’s the part that just…” you shake your fist in the air “just… clutches the fan, y’know? keeps it in place.”

“huh. that’s right.” yoongi cocks his head

wait what

holy shit

you’re a genius

you are a GENIUS  

“i am???”

“no.” he deadpans and smirks when you scowl playfully “you’re cute, though.”

.,,.,.frick

“good morning, namjoon.” yoongi hums as he steps into the office with a biG bag of lollipops

“morning…?” this is vEry unfamiliar territory because the last time yoongi said good morning to namjoon it was on his birthday

well

it’s best not to question it

he should just enjOy sociable yoongi “you seem extra chipper this morning!” namjoon points out

“do i?” yoongi pulls the lid off the glass jar and sets it aside

click clack click clack

the lollipops hit the side of the jar as yoongi fills it aLL the way up

he turns to toss the bag away into the bin

namjoon pulls a lollipop out of the jar before furrowing his brows

he twists the treat in between his fingers and takes note of the little cartoon strawberries on the wrapper “i thought you were a raspberry man?”

“i am” yoongi plucks the lollipop from namjoon’s fingers and plunks it into the jar before covering it up

“but all of these are strawberry flavoured.”

“yes, and?”

namjoon raises his hands in defence “nothing! just saying.”

how very odd

yoongi despises strawberry

“hi namjoon!” the little bell tinkers as you step into the office

“y/n, hey! how was your day? yoongi’s in the middle of a call but he’ll be out soon.”

“it was okay! i got my essay back and i did pretty well- oOH strawberry” you gasp and iMMediately shoVe your hand into the jar

there it is

the final piece of the puzzle

it all makes sense now

“huh.” namjoon leans back against his chair and crosses his arms as he watches you unwrap the lollipop excitedly

“whaht?” you ask aroUnd the lollipop and namjoon shakes his head

“oh, nothing.”

interesting

vEry interesting

yoongi despises strawberry but it seems like he doesn’t despise you

it is univERsally known that sundays are meant to be day-offs

you’re supposed to sleep in on sundays

you go out for bRUnch on sundays

you most certainly don’t wake up at 8am and spend twO hours getting ready and then take an uber down to the mechanics shop to see the cute boy who works there

normal people don’t dO THAT

“what are you doing here? it’s sunday…” even yoongi is confused as to why you’re here

hE doesn’t even want to be here

“i know, i just… y’know, i was bored, so-“

“you came all the way here because you were bored?” yoongi’s brows knit together and you feel your cheeks flush

you reach up to scratch the back of your neck before pursing your lips “…yes?” you look around and realise that no one else is in sight “where is everyone?”

“…it’s sunday.” yoongi teases and brings his attention back to the faulty hose in his hands

god

what is wrong with the hose today yoongi slaps it against his palm a couple of times

his brows furrow in frustration before he gives it a good tWisT-

SCHKKKKKKKKKK

oH Okay there it is

“there we go!” yoongi twists it back to turn it off “i think i might need to invest in a new hose because i just wasted like 10 minutes trying to turn it on“ he looks up at you

OH MY GOD

you’re gawkinG like a fish and all the blood drains from yoongi’s face when he realizes what just happened  

oh mygOD

he’s going to have to work for the rest of his life to pay for your dry cleaning

he’s going to have to sell his shop and that won’t even be enough to cover the cost of cleaning your gucci purse

“y/n… shit… i am sO sorry….” yoongi swallows thickly because you still haven’t responded  

you drop your purse on the floor and yoongi presses his lips together

t-the gucci is soaking wet

ᵗʰᵉ ᵍᵘᶜᶜᶦ ᶦˢ ˢᵒᵃᵏᶦⁿᵍ ʷᵉᵗ

hooOooOOOLY SHit he wants to die

he wants to die!!!!!!!!!!!

he wants to guZZLe a gallon of petrol and just DIE

you’re going to sue him

no

you’re going to get your dad to sue him which is even worse

he drops the hose to the floor with a clatter before turning to grab the rag sitting on the hood of the truck  

“i’ll get you another towel but you can use this to dry off for no- WHAT-“ not even a seCOND goes by and all of a sudden there’s water being dumpED right on top of him  

and to make matters worse

this is soapy water used to wash the car

he’s dripping with dirty soapy water from head to toe

“there. now we’re even!” you let out a sigh and set the bucket down before wiping your hands on the back of your leggings even though that does absolutely NOTHING

“…you have three seconds.”

you’re still wiping your hands on your leggings “three seconds to- oH MY GOD WAIT-“ you begin sprinting as soon as yoongi moves into action and the next thing you know he’s chasing you around the garage with the hose

you two are acting like chiLDREN

“yOONGI NO” you shriek when you feel cold water blast against you once again

your guys laughter bounces off the walls of the garage along with the occasional screEch from you

“get away from me you freAK-“ yoongi cackles when he gets a good blast of water right against your butt causing you to scream even louDer than you already were

you can feel him gaining on you because the pressure of the water is starting to get stronger and stronger

you let out a shriek before bursting into laughter when yoongi wraps his arm around you from behind and you immediately start squirming in his grip

you manage to turn around and the two of you start baTTling for the hose

“giVE it to mE-“ you squeeze your eyes shut because you’re sure getting blasted in the eyeball with water won’t be nice

“over my dead body!!!!!!” yoongi laughs and starts tickling your sides with his free hand

“min yooNGI it’s my turn to-“

“get your grUbby hands off the-“

of course

the floor is now slippery as hell (and yoongi’s water bill is going to be hIGH this month if you two keep going at it lol)

so of course

“woAH-!“

“oh SHIt-“

the nExt thing you know you’re staring up at

well

you’re staring right up at yoongi

“i-“ you have no idea why but your fingers are wrapped around his soaKing wet bicep and you quickly let go and place your hands on either side of you like a damn corpse “hi.”

the hose has been completely abandoned next to you guys and it’s still spurting out water

“hey.” he pants from the exertion of chasing you around the garage and his eyes flicker down to your lips veRy briefly you’re not sure it even happened

he’s settled riGht in between your legs and once you realise this your cheeks flame up

oh my god

dO something

“call it a truce?” you offer meekly and yoongi raises a brow before nodding once

“…i suppose so.” you yeLp in surprise when he suddenly shakes his hair out like a dog and practically assaults you with droplets of water

you scowl playfully and wipe at your cheek

yoongi grins down at you and gets off of you

he stands up and looks down at his sopping wet jumpsuit before offering you a hand “c’mon.” he jerks his head towards the office “let’s dry you up, doll.”

you wring the water out of your blouse and yelp quietly when you feel cold droplets of water splatter onto your bare foot

also

this YSL mascara was noT worth the money because you look like a raccoon right now

“i have an extra shirt somewhere… ah, here we are!”

you look at yoongi in the mirror of your compact as he emerges from the office with a-

oh good god

what is that

you clap your compact shut and tuck it back into your purse before spinning around and letting your eyes trail down to the….

can u even call that a shirt

“i refuse to put that thing on my body.” you can’t even bring yourself to reach out and take the raggedy denim button-up from yoongi because it just looks so.,.,.,.,.,. grOSS

“aw, c’mon! it’s cute! denim is super trendy.”

“why is it so dirty??”

“they’re just grease stains!! i swear!” yoongi brings the shirt up to his nose and takes a fAT whiff “anD i washed it!”

“well you can either wear this oR you can wear your sopping wet clothes.” yoongi points to the garBage bag containing all your soaking wet belongings and you let out a groan before reaching out and taking the shirt from him

“if it’ll make you feel better i have a pen here and i can just write gucci on the label!”

“ha-ha, very funny.,,., i accept louis vuitton as well”

“i’m going to see if i have any clothes for myself” yoongi disappears into the office again and you work quickly to rip your soPping wet clothes off as quickly as possible

“you know, i can always hook you up with some better quality shirts!” you start buttoning yourself up and you bring your arm up to your nose to give the sleeve a little sniff

it smells like his cologne >:)

you tug the shirt down a little bit and look behind you to make sure your ass isn’t hanging out and saying peekaboo

it’s big enough to the point where it covers everything appropriately and also it reaches mid-thigh

but if you bent down you’d definitely be giving everyone a show lol

“we can stick your logo on the back and everything-“

“sorry, what’d you say? i didn’t catch that.”

you turn around to face yoongi “i was saying that i- oH“

o-OH My GO D

R E D  A L E R T

your heart literally stops at the sight of a very, very shirtless yoongi

he shakes his hair out before running a hand through it with a sigh “luckily i had some spare clothes here otherwise i’d have to drive you home completely naked…”

you are bAREly paying attention to a word he is saying right now

this is it

min yoongi is one of the seven wonders of the world

he has a pair of grey sweatpants hanging low on his hips and not to be nsfW but he might,..,,. not be wearing any briefs right now.,..,

you glance back up at his face and clear your throat when you realise he’s staring right back at you with the teeniest of smirks

“what’s the matter, doll? cat got your tongue?”

the cat don’t but that diCK dO

“your carriage awaits, madam” yoongi bows and gestures towards his pick up truck

“why, thank you, kind sir.” you gladly take his hand and he helps you into the truck

the car ride consists of you and yoongi continuing to get to know each other a lil more

the conversation flows very smoothly and easily between the two of you and that makes u happy :-))))

you tell him about that one time you thought there was a robber in your house but it turned out to be a squirrel which is moRE confusing because how the hell did the squirrel make it up so high

yoongi tells you about that one time he was staying late at the shop and hE thought there was a robber in the garage but it was just a drunk jungkook tripping over a stack of tires

you ask him about his family and he asks you about yours

you tell him you love ur mom and dad a lot but you’re suPer glad to be living on your own because it gets overwhelming sometimes

yoongi says he has a good relationship with his family too (but they weren’t pleased when he came home for new years and they discovered his tATTOO SLEEVE and his BLEACHED HAIR)

he tells you about his lil dog named holly (who he misses so much!!!!!) and you tell him about your pet turtle walter who lives at home with your parents

you find out that his favourite pizza toppings are pepperonis and pineapples and you fULLY roast him for that disgusting combination

and then he finds out that your favourite pizza toppings are spinach leaves, fire-grilled chicken, and caramelised red onions and he’s like okay miss bouGIe do u realise how much more expensive my pizza would be if i asked for fire-grilled chicken  

he listens to hip-hop most of the time but he does have a soft spot for ariana grande and halsey

he bEgs you not to say anything to the boys

he’s not insecure about his masculinity or anything

he just doesn’t want them to bLAST break up w ur boyfriend i’m bored in the shop all day even tho it’s a B O P

“okay, turn into the roundabout here…” you point towards the penthouse buildings once yoongi drives past the gates (u live in a gaTed community u r so bougie!!!!!!!!!)  

“this building? the one with the… marBle fountain?”

“mhm, you got it.” you unbuckle your seatbelt and turn to smile at him “thank you for the ride and the shower.”

“anytime, doll.” yoongi plays along and his right eye drops in a wink

he chews on the inside of his cheek nervously

should he go for it

,.,..,

yeah he’s going to go for it

“hey, by the way-“ he stops you before you can hop out of the truth “the guys and i are hanging out this friday at this club we usually go to... don’t feel pressured to say yes or anything but if you wanna tag along that’d be totally-“

“yEs i would love to!” you blurt out and yoongi pauses and chuckles lightly

omg

yES you definiTEly want to

“okay, i’ll text you the details as soon as i figure out what’s happening.”

“sounds good!!” you shut the door and yoongi rolls the window down

“i’ll see you later then?”

“mhm! by the way - i’m keeping the shirt.”

yoongi snorts and rolls his eyes playfully as he watches you make your way to the entrance

he bites back a smile and leans back against the seat before letting out a breath and turning the truck back on

you really are something

friday can’t come soon enough

oh boy

your bedroom looks like it’s just been hit by a tornado

because it is a mEss

“i have nothing to wear!” you whine to nobody in particular as you stand in the middle of your walk-in closet and look around at the racks and racKs of clothing surrounding you

first you tried a tank top tucked into a pair of jeans and a sensible cardigan but then you remembered riGHt i’m going to a club i’m not going to the LIBRARY

and then you tried this brand new dress from chanel but you decided it was too ~avant-garde~ (u don’t really know what that means but that’s how the lady described it to you when she was selling it to you) for the club

and theN you tried a jumpsuit kinda thing but you’re not going to want to completely strIP down and sit on the toilet butt-ass naked when you have to pee

but u know what

after 2 hours (yes, TWO hours) of going through your closet you think you’ve finally pieced a sensible outfit together

it’s a baby blue slip dress (you bought it to match with beeper and u will shamelessly admit that) and you pair it with these adorable strappy platform sandals and of course a brand new gucci clutch  

hm

you look so cuTe you love this outfit

you kinda look like an early 2000s bratz doll and you’re,.,.,. ObseSsed with that

also

if someone compliments you on your outfit you’re definitely going to hit them with a “oh, this old thing? i just threW it on!”

no one will ever know it took you 120 minutes to pick (1) blue dress

you’re taking this secret to the GRAVE

yoongi offered to pick you up but you told him you’d be fine getting there by yourself

plus you really wanted to go in fashionably late (not tOO late of course) and just knock the socks off of everyone

you fully accept that you are a tiny bit of an attention whore

>:-)

“i think i should’ve picked her up.” yoongi mutters as he takes the last sip of his beer

it’s 9:30 and you’re stiLL not here

he’s checked his phone literally ten times in twenty minutes to make sure that he hasn’t missed any texts or calls or

“i think you’re overthinking this. she’ll get here! maybe there’s traffic.” jimin pats yoongi’s shoulder before returning to his conversation with hoseok

“and even if she doesn’T come you can still have fun with us!” jungkook points out and yoongi frowns “what??? we’re just as fun as y/n!!”

“we might be just as fun as y/n but yoongi doesn’t wanna make out with you like he does y/n-“

“soRRY you guys my uber dropped me off like three blocks away from here for some reason and i didn’t realise how hard it was walking in platform sandals” yoongi jumps in surprise when you suddenly poP out of nowhere

“this is why i should’ve picked you u-“ yoongi turns his head and finally gets a good look at you

shit you look good

he’s.,,.,. never seen your bAre legs before but he most definitely wants to bury his face in between them!!!!!!

oops

“are you two done checking each other out yet?” taehyung raises a brow and you and yoongi break gazes immediately

yoongi looks up at the little lightbulb hanging from the ceiling and you look towards the bowl of pretzels sitting on the table

namjoon smacks tae’s arm scoldingly

quick change the subject

“have you guys just been sitting here this whole time?” you take a seat next to yoongi and you’re hAPPy to report that he doesn’t move when the side of your thigh presses up against him

you’re used to seeing yoongi in a jumpsuit (which is hot) or like a plain white tee tucked into a pair of jeans (which is aLso hot) but tonight he looks extra EXTRA hot

he’s wearing all bLAck tonight

black t-shirt

black ripped jeans

black bomber jacket

he even smells sexy

he smells like that denim shirt that’s hanging in ur closet

oH and he’s wearing a bandana and for some reason the sight of him in a bandana makes you s w e a t

yoongi leans back and drapes an arm over the back of the booth and you’re vEry tempted to snuggle right into him but unfortunately the two of you are noT at that stage yet

“this is our third bowl of pretzels and our second round of beers, so no, we haven’t just been sitting here this whole time.” jungkook points out smartly and you nod understanDably

he’s such a dweeb

you love it

alright well

apparently the party don’t start til you walk in

you give yoongi’s thigh a couple pats before pointing at the bar “i’m gonna go get us some shots!” you grin excitedly as you slide out of the booth

all of the boys sit in silence until they all decide you’re at a safe distance away from them

“…..she touched your thiGhHhHhhhH” taehyung wiggles his brows and yoongi scoffs and rolls his eyes

“so what?”

“…yo diCK is close to your thiGhHhHhhhH”

“so in a way she indirectly touched your dick” jungkook holds his hand out for a fist bump

yoongi looks at the two of them in an unimpressed manner

“hi, can i get a round of kamikazes please?” you smile politely at the bartender before handing him your card

you gon be honest

you don’t actually know what a kamikaze is

you googled a list of shots on your way here and kamikaze was on that list

there’s also a type of shot called a blowjob but you’re not sure how it’s going to go down if you ask the bartender for a round of blowjobs

“what’s a pretty little thing like you doing at a place like this?” you jump in surprise when someone suddenly appears next to you and you’re about to run away in fear but then you get a better look at this guy

there’s no other way to describe it

this binch looks just as Expensive as you

you recognise that limited edition gold rolex that wink at you under the shoddy lighting

“…i could say the same for you” you raise a brow before turning to face the bar again

whY is the bartender taking so long

the guy laughs and tilts his head back a little before leaning forward and offering you a smirk “i’m seokjin. and you are?”

“not interested.” you clap back immediately jin raises his hands in defence but doesn’t back off

“feisty, aren’t we?”

“only when we have to be.” you shrug casually

“fair enough.” he hums and drums his fingers against the counter

a beat of silence goes by and you’re surprised he hasn’t made anoTher move

this guy seems harmless enough so you figure that giving him your name won’t be the woRst decision you’ll ever make in your life

plus the bartender is really taking his sweet time with those drinks and you’re getting bored

“i’m y/n.” you stick your hand out and jin’s eyes flicker down to your hand before he takes it graciously and gives you a firm shake

“well, it’s very nice to meet you. are you here by yourself?”

you snort immediately and shake your head “i wouldn’t come here by myself.” the bartender pauses and raises a brow at you and you give him a sheepish smile “no offence.”

if you thought your drinks were taking a long time to be made they’re going to take even lonGer now

good job u goober

“can i at least buy you a drink? maybe you can come over to my booth and we can chit-chat, see where that takes us…”

“or you could just buy me a drink and we can go our separate ways from there.” you grin and jin tilts his head before letting out a small laugh

“is that how you’re going to play it, sweetheart?” the thin gold chain hanging around his neck shimmers slightly as he shifts and leans closer to you

“i pholhd yew i could fit more phretfulz into my mouf fhan yew” jungkook mumbles and a pretzel falls out of his mouth

jimin is crAcking up at the sight of taehyung practically drooling all over himself

namjoon looks disappointed and hoseok looks vEry amused

yoongi glances over at the bar and furrows his brows in confusion when he sees you talking to,.,.., someone you’re obviously very comfortable with if you’re letting him tuck your hair behind your ear like that

whoever this fella is

he’s wearing a crisp button-up tucked into a pair of slacks and he has his sleeves rolled up (and he knows how weak u r for rolled up sleeves because you always get really moon-eyed when hE rolls his sleeves up)

yoongi clears his throat and shifts in his seat

what was he thinking???  

christ

you guys are from two different worlds

what

was

he

thinking!!!

inviting you here?? and you’RE paying the shots omg he should’ve gone up there to pay for the shots

“miss, your round of kamikazes?”

“be a gentleman, kihyun. why don’t you deliver her shots to her friends for her?” jin points over at yoongi and the others and kihyun nods obediently

“oH oh you really don’t have to- okay never mind”

jin is a nice guy but also u want to go back to ur friends

“so, where were we?”

“you were about to buy me a drink and i was going to accept the drink and then leave” you joke and turn to look over your shoulder juSt in time to see kihyun setting the tray down on the table

okay you know what

one drink isn’t going to hurt

you’ll just enjoy onE drink and then you’ll leave

that way the boTh of you are satisfied..,,.ish

yoongi can’t help but glance over at the bar agaIN and he rolls his eyes when he catches the sight of you throwing your head back in laughter at something

who the hell does this guy think he is anyway

and what kinda guy who dresses like thAt would want to hang out here

no

he’s overthinking it

“hey, your friend told me to bring the shots here. seven kamikazes.”

“OoOohHH yeah lets gET IT” jungkook reaches for a shot as soon as the tray is set down and it goes down his hatch in 0.1 seconds

uh

okay wow

obviously you’re not interested in hanging out with them anymore because you’re stiLL with that guy at the var aND you got the bartender to deliver the shots over so you could kEEP talking to mr. perfect over there

“ooh, these are good!!”

“veRy citrusy”

“are we sure there’s even alcohol in this because it kinda just tastes like orange juice”

“you think we can order more?”

yoongi’s shot is the only one left untouched

jungkook reaches over to tap his shoulder

“hyung, you gonna take a shot?”

yoongi clenches his jaw and reaches over blindly for the shot glass

he tilts his head back and swallows it before setting the glass down firmly

“jEez it wasn’t like i was going to take it or anything” jungkook mutters under his breath

whAtever

yoongi wipes his mouth with the back of his hand

you’re allowed to flirt with whoever you’d like

it’s not like you guys have a thing or anything

you even told him you didn’t want him to come and pick you up so obviously you’ve established that this is a friendship and nothing more

it’s fine

yeah

you guys don’t have a thing

which means hE can flirt with whoever he’d like as well

“anywaYs you’re very nice, jin, but i don’t want you to get the wrong idea or anything…” you smile sheepishly and scratch the back of your neck

you don’t want to tell this complete stranGer about the ins and outs of your will-they-won’t-they relationship with yoongi but you are vEry much tipsy and tipsy y/n just does not have a filter whatsoever “i’m here with yoongi!!!!!!” you clear your throat and gesture towards where the boys are

that strawberry margarita was really good

you could probably drink like twelveteen more of those  

jin glances over your shoulder and raises a peRfect brow (you need to ask him where he gets his brows done because woW)

“which one is this yoongi?” he looks back at you

uh

you weren’t expecting to be quEstioned like this

“uh, he’s the one with the-“ you turn to glance over your shoulder

huh

yoongi isn’t at the table

“well he’s around here someWhere he’s wearing a bandana and he has a tattoo sleeve you know he’s reALLy not that hard to spot-“

“oh! i see him!” you perk up immediately and try to follow jin’s line of sight “you mean the one dancing with my friend?”

wait what

“your friend? where’s your friend-“ the moment your eyes land on yoongi and jin’s friend you feel every single droplet of blood draining from your face

oh boy

yep

that’s yoongi alright

she has a hand tangled up in his hair while the other is running down his chest

he leans down as she says something in his ear and you see him laugh

the two of them continue to sway to the beat and you feel sick to your stomach when you notice her push yoongi’s hand down from her waist to her bum

you immediately turn back to face jin and you feel your cheeks heat up in embarrassment

u just told this guY that you were here with another guY only to find out that the guy that you came with looks like he’s having a greAt time with someone else  

yikes

“for the record - i would never do that to you.” he asks “chivalry is hard to find nowadays, no?”

you swallow thickly and try to snap yourself out of it

it’s not a big deal

yoongi can do whatever he wants

it’s not like he’s showing romantic interest in you just because he invited you to hang out with him

you’re just one of the bros

“say- how about you and your friends join my friends and i in the vip room? the more, the merrier!” jin nods in acknowledgement as the bartender sets a tray of shots down on the counter for him

“uh, maybe! maybe. thank you for the drink, by the way.” you smile politely and watch as he heads towards the velvet door with a gold VIP label on it

how faNcy  

you weren’t going to mention anything to the guys but they asked you what took you so long and the moment the phrase ‘vip section’ slips out of your mouth all the boys immEdiately slide out of the booth and head to said section

you and jimin bumped into yoongi on the dance floor on the way there and you kinda just.,.., awkwardly trailed behind him and his new gal pal as aLL of you made your way over there

anyways

now you’re here

in this truly unfortunate situation

and you are praying to all the gods to just make a black hole appear in the ground and swallow you up

first of all

you didn’t know how Big this room was

and you didn’t know that one person (jin) could have so many frienDS

because you are sitting in a circle with probabLy like twenty-ish (or more) other people (including the boys of course)

the point is you want to be literaLLy anywhere else BUT here right now

“i’m assuming everybody knows the rules of the game-“ jin sets the empty bottle of beer in the centre of the circle and you feel your palms starting to sweat because heLLO you don’T know the rules of the game

also you don’t know haLF these people

a couple of the girls introduced themselves to you but you have horrible memory so their names went into one ear and riGht out the other in like 0.1 seconds

“maybe you should, like, go over the rules one more time to… y’know, to refresh our memories!” you clear your throat and feel your cheeks heat up when you catch jennie snickering

“okay, well… you spin the bottle, and whoever the bottle points at, you have to kiss them for ten seconds.”

“it’s pretty self-explanatory.” one of the other girls mutter

you take your bottom lip in between your teeth nervously “what happens if you don’T wanna kiss that person?”

“then you have to take off an article of clothing.”

wait what

t-that doesn’t sound like regular spin the bottle

thaT’s not how they do in the movies!!!!! everyone’s clothes stay ON in the movies!!!!!  

and then you realise

you oNLY have a dress on

you don’t have a cardigan or a jacket or anything

so if you don’t wanna kiss anybody you’re going to have to take your dress off

in front of all these people!!!!!!!!!!

can i get a thank u nEXT

“um, i have another question!” your hand shoots up into the air “what if instead of taking a piece of clothing off you take a shot instead?”

“ah, that’s a good idea! if you don’t want to kiss your person, then you take a shot aND you take a piece of clothing off!” jin claps his hands together “good thinking, y/n!”

WAIT WHAT

nO you would like to retrACT your statement omg

so

you can safely say that this is one of the WORST experiences in your life

it’s about twenty minutes into the game

they actually changed the rules again so now you take a shot regardless of if you want to kiss your person or not

needless to say everybody is pretty hammered right now

except you of course

you’re like KindA tipsy

like giggly tipsy!!!! jin just keeps ordering margaritas for you and it would be ruDE of you to reject them

but you haven’t taken any shots yet

because you are one of the only people who hasn’t gotten a chance to spin the bottle yet (thank god)

you also are one of the only people who the bottle hasn’t landed on yet (which is also a thank goD)

“hey”

you turn to look at jin and a smile twitches at your lips when he hiccups

his cheeks are rosy and he’s glowing a bit

loVe that for him

“what do yoU want” you tease

“is there a mirror in your pants?”

“i’m not wearing pants.” you point out and gesture to your dress

“yah- can you just play along??” jin scoffs and pinches your arm

“okAy okay fine go on”

“-because i can seE myself in them” he beams proudly

you snort and roll your eyes playfully before whacking his bicep as he bursts into squeaKy giggles

“you think you’re funny?” you tease and jin nudges his elbow against yours

“you don’t think i’m funny??”

“i absolutely don’t think you’re funny”

“oOOh i have another one”

“can’t be any worse that that mirror one”

“the word of the day is legs.”

“is it?”

“let’s say we head back to your place and spread the word.”  he purrs into your ear and you nEARly screech

“jiN!!!!” you gasp and turn to gawk at him “that’s hoRRIBle you FreAK”

yoongi clenches his jaw when he sees you smack jin’s arm as the two of you continue giGGling away at god knows what

whatever he said can’t possibly be thAt funny

“my turn!!!” jennie gets up onto her knees and shuffles towards the bottle

you suddenly stop laughing because oh no it’s jennie’s turn

with a quick fliCk of her wrist she sends the bottle spinning

okay

logically speaking there is a 1/28 chance of it landing on you

but more importantly

logically speaking there is a 1/28 chance of it landing on a certain someone else who shall not be named but it’s pretty obvious who you don’T want it to land on

your nails dig into the meat of your palm as you watch the bottle intently

you don’t get a chance to continue worrying about the logistics of the situation because jin taps your shoulder again

good

you need a distraction anyways

she spun it really violently so it seems like it’s going to take a while to get there lol

“hEy hey hey i’ll give u a nickel if u tickle my pickle”

you snort immediately and shake your head

“i’ll give you a nickel to shuT up” you reach over to flick his forehead “we met like forty minutes ago but i am confident in saying that you only think with your dick”

“in thAt case would you like to blow my mind?”

chRIST

it neVER ENDS

yoongi sets his beer down slowly when the he realises the bottle is pointing right at him

he swallows thickly

oh boy

his eyes flicker up and he sees jennie looking right at him with bEdroOm eyes

and then he hears you and jin craCking up and he turns his head to look at you guys

…..,.,,.,.

what if jin takes you home tonight

what if jin takes you home tonight

well

FINe

if jin takes you home tonight then he’s allowed to take jennie home tonight

yoongi’s eyes flicker back to jennie and he gestures towards himself before leaning back against one palm “get over here.”

“c’mon now, that one was really good!”

“if you ever approach someone with that line you’re going to get slapped-“ you immediately lose your train of thought when you turn your head to see jennie and yoongi fuLLy going at it

“and that’s 10 seconds!”

yoongi’s the first to pull away and he wipes his mouth with the back of his hand

he ain’t gon lie

that was kind of slobbery

her lip gloss is also sickLY sweet

“y/n, you’re the only one who hasn’t spun yet! why don’t you give it a try?” jin nudges your side and you snap out of it and look at the bottle “i know yoongi’s technically supposed to be spinning now but we should give you a shot at it before someone goes twice.”

“oh, i don’t- um, i don’t… i think i might just skip my turn.” you smile nervously

your heart is haMMering away in your chest

there are a million and one thoughts running through your mind right now and the amount of alcohol that’s flowing through your veins probably isn’t helping to calm you down

u just

u really liked yoongi :-(

you’ve had so much fun spending time with him for the past couple of weeks

but obviously you aren’t his type

which is okay! that’s fine

everything’s fine

also

you don’t want to play this game because you don’t want your first kiss to be because of spIN the bottle

“c’mon, y/n. we aren’t getting any younger here, girl!”

“o-okay! okay, i’m- i’ll spin.” you clear your throat before leaning over and grasping the bottle

you give it a good agGREssive spin and watch as it goes round and round and round and round

oh boy

this sucks

you thought he liked u back

like you really REALLy thought he liked you back

he’s just been so nice and sweet to you!!!!!!

well to be fair he kind of has to be nice and sweet to you because you are paying him to fix your verY expensive car

he probably just wanted a faT tip that’s why he’s been so kind

and maybe he only invited you here tonight because you bought lunch for him

also you literally have no experience with situations like this so you can’t assume that he likEs you just because you like him

whatever

you should go for someone like jungkook who’s closer to you in age

well thEre you go again assuming that someone who obviously doesn’t like you likes you

“hey, look at that! it’s your lucky day, y/n!”

you snap out of it aGAIN and look down at the bottle that’s pointing right at

jin

you turn your head to look at him and he immediately flashes you his oh-so-charming smile “get ready for the best 10 seconds of your life, darling”

you immEdiately start to panic when jin reaches up to cup the side of your jaw and your fingers wrap around his wrist tightly

okay

yeah

just go with it

kiss him

he’s a nice guy!!!!! he bought manY drinks for you, he invited you and your friends to his vip room, he’s nice!!!!!

you’re going to give this complete sTRanger your first kiss even though you would much rather give it to yoongi

jin has nice lips though so maybe you can just preTEnd it’s yoo-

“waIT WAIt waIT-“ jin jolts in surprise before his eyes pop open and he blinks at you “i- my lips are chapped.”  

his eyes flicker down to your lips and you feel your cheeks flush when his thumb brushes over your bottom lip “they feel awfully smooth to me.”

he starts leaning in again

and in the corner of your eye you see yoongi leaning in and whispering something into jennie’s ear

she places her hand on his knee and starts sliding it up his thigh

and you don’t know what happens

but you snAp

“what the hell is wrong with you??”

y i k e s

jin’s eyes pop open and he’s about to retaliate but he realises you’re not even looking at him

you’re looking at yoongi

yoongi furrows his brows before scoffing and look around the circle “is this part of the game?” he jokes and there’s like a scAtter of nervous laughter

“i’m-“ you look around the circle as well and swallow thickly

ok

maybe u just embarrassed urself a little bit by your outburst

a couple people are avoiding eye contact with you

namjoon presses his lips together and looks down when you look at him

hoseok is giving you a pity-infused smile

and jungkook

jungkook fell asleep on one of the girls

“i’m- uh, i should go.” you mutter and get up off the ground “soRRy about that, you guys!” you clear your throat and gesture to the bottle “someone else can take my turn!”

“i’ll spin!” jin claps his hands together when a beat of silence goes by “if ya can’t take the heat, get out of the kitchen!” he jokes

another round of scattered laughter

at least there’s less awKward tension

you can feel how hot your face is from under your makeup

at least it’s full coverage so no one will ever be able to tell that your face is on FIRE

the chilly air sobers you up a little more as you push the door open

you let out a breath and pull your phone out to call an uber

you just want to go home

wipe all this makeup off

wash your hair

maybe you’ll take a bubble bath

do a face mask

“y/n, wait-“ the momeNT you hear yoongi’s voice all hell breaks loose once again

you are AN G RY

“let gO of me-!” you shove yoongi’s hand off your wrist before whipping around and adjusting your purse on your shoulder with a huff

yoongi immediately raises his hands in defence before he furrows his brows at you “what the hell was that all about?? are you ok-“

“is this just a game to you??”

yoongi blinks at you before scratching the back of his neck

“is… is the game… just a game to me?”

“no i’m not talking about the stUpid game yoongi i’m talking about-“ you pause because you don’t really know hoW to word this without sounding like an obsessive maniac “i don’t understand you! i thought you- you’re just sO fruSTRATING”

yoongi scoffs immEdiately and crosses his arms

“i don’t think you’re allowed to say that when you were the one flirting with jin like craZy”

“i wasn’t- i wasn’t flirting with him!”

“you totALLy were! someone would have to be blind if they thought you weren’t flirting with him!”

“you were the one who literally mADE out with someone else!!!”

“y/n, it was a game-“

“i just don’t think it’s fair that yOU were the one who invited me to this hole in the wall and then yOU go off and start making out with someone else and dancing and-“

“well you know what i am so so sorry for taking you to this grubby hole in the wall!” yoongi snaps and you shut up immediately “you know what, you’re right, i think it’d be better if you just left.”

“i think it’d be better if we just nEver saw each other again!” you snap and cross your arms “we’re compLETE opposites-“

“sounds good to me!!! we’re from two diFFerent worlds so you should heAd back to the land of elitists because i- oh! should i hail a cab for you or is that too gross and poor for little miss spoilt brat??” yoongi’s tone is sO patronising and you’re (this) close to slapping him across the face “what’s the matter?? something doesn’t go your way so the firSt thing you do is sTorm out like a child????”

“excuse me?!” you hiss and shove at his chest “you’re an asshole. you’re an asshole!”

you already feel angry tears prickling at your eyes as you whip around

“fuck, y/n, wait-!”

all you know is that you don’t ever want to see min yoongi ever again and you’d be happy to get in your car and run him over and over and over and ovER agAIN

and suddenly you’re reminded that you don’t have a car to run him over with because your car is in hIS damn SHOP

“y/n, i didn’t mean-“

somehow you manage to cross the street without tripping over yourself and you pick up the pace to get as far away from yoongi as possible

god

what a night

you should’ve stayed home

the moment you step into the penthouse everything just seems to go wrong

your keys fall the ground with a clatter

you nearly trIp and fall flat on your face as you undo your sandals

you toss your clutch onto the couch but it bounces off the pillows and falls to the ground

you head straight to your bedroom and the second you throw yourself onto the bed you burst into tears

you hate everything

everything sucks

min yoongi espeCially sucks

you hate that he,.,.,. he patronised and belittled you like that

you haTe that he made all those comments about you being a spoilt brat because everyone who’s ever been mean to you have made those exact comments and you never thought yoongi would be one of those people

okay look

you don’t want to be one of those rich people but you can’t help it!!!! yes you’ve always had more of a comfortable lifestyle (which is completely out of your control like wtf you didn’t chOOSe to be born into a well-off family) but like.,., at the same time it’s isolated you

throughout elementary school and high school you know for a fact you were invited to all those parties and dinners only because people knew that you’d be the one who’d get them the most expensive presents (you got this one girl a purse from louis vuitton one year and the next year when you got her a bag of gummy bears ((because she liKED guMMY BEARs)) she literally threw them into the bin and you were like??? and then when you apologised and gave her a necklace from tiffany’s she immediately forgave you and you did noT like that vibe) or you’d be the one who was always like “i’ll get the bill!!!! no worries!!!!!!”

and now we’re back to square 1

completely alone

because you’ll never be anything more than little miss spoilt brat who maxes out daddy’s credit card and pouts when she doesn’t get what she wants  

oh my god

you’re going to be become one of those rich old ladies who don’t have anybody to share their huGe mansions with

“hyung? you alright?” jungkook asks meekly

as soon as yoongi ran out after you all of the boys did the same

of course they kept their distance but they heard evErything from your guys’ conversation

and now yoongi’s just standing by the truck

namjoon clears his throat before jingling the keys in his fingers (they fell out of yoongi’s pocket when he ran out) “i’ll drive because i only took that one shot and i’m pretty sure it’s worn off-“

all of a sudden yoongi swINgs his fist and drives it sTraight into the side mirror

hoseok yelps in surprise and jimin immediately slaps a hand over his mouth

the mirror immediately cracks and shatters into pieces before splintering onto the ground

yoongi’s panting slightly as he inspects the damage on boTh the mirror and his fist

droplets of blood splatter onto the floor among the pieces of glass

he clenches his fist and watches as crimson continues to ooze out of the fresh wound

yoongi opens the door and hops into the truck before slamming the door shut

everyone else kinda looks at each other

poor jungkook has gone has white as a sheet of paper because he gets vEry queasy over the sight of blood

“he bent the mirror.” tae squeaks out

he did noT know yoongi was capable of causing that much damage

“everyone get into the truck. now.” namjoon hisses lowly and everyone scuRries to get in

the shards of glass crunch underneath the tires as namjoon pulls out of the parking spot

yoongi stays silent the entire ride back

he doesn’t flinch when namjoon tends to his wounds and literally pulls a thin sliver of glass out from his knuckles

it sTings and burns like hell but it doesn’t show on his face

it’s fine

yoongi knows he deserves the pain.

it has officially been twelve days since the blowout

and yoongi thinks he’s losing his mind

he can’t stop thinking about you

he can’t stop thinking about how your eyes glazed over and your bottom lip trembled

how your voice wavered as you shoved at his chest and called him an asshole

it doesn’t matter

you two would’ve never worked out anyway so maybe this fight was for the best

he just won’T come in to work the day you come and pick your car up

yeah! it doesn’t matter at all

all you are is an entitled trust fund baby who whines when she doesn’t get what she wants and when you dO get what you want it’s simply not enough

but oh

yoongi knows he’s just lying through his teeth when he says that

you’re noT just this one-dimensional princess

there’s more to you than just that

there’s so much more to you

you’re so kindhearted and generous

hE was the one who fucked up

hE was the one who got weirdly insecure and completely lashed out on you

hE was the one who made out with that jennie girl in front of you knowIng that there was something between the two of you even though it had never been established

he knEW that you liked him yet he still pulled all that shit

why?????? WHY?????

anyways

he hasn’t made a move to text or call you because he knows you’re not going to respond to him

he did draft out this long long text message but he ended up deleting it

and he was going to leave a voicemail but it was just really awkward and also he ran out of time

it kept beeping on him before he could finish his speech

he knows he’s the last person you want to hear from right now

yoongi looks down at his wrapped up knuckles and slowly makes a fist

oW

why couldn’t he have punched a piLLOW

yoongi swivels around in his chair when he hears a gentle knock on the door

“what do you want?” he gets straIght to the point and jimin raises a brow before deciding it’s okay to let himself in

“uh, i just need you to sign off on this order.” he places the clipboard on the desk

yoongi’s pen glides over the dotted line quickly and he clicks it before shoving it back into the pen holder

“cool, thanks.” jimin nods and picks the clipboard back up

before he can make it to the door yoongi speaks up again

“can i ask you something?”

jimin turns to glance over his shoulder before he turns all the way so he can face yoongi

he has a feeling he knows where this is going

“you guys heard everything, didn’t you?”

“heard wha-“

“you know what i’m talking about.” yoongi says gently

jimin knows it’s best noT to beat around the bush

after all he doesn’t want to end up like that side mirror

lol

.,,.,too soon?

“um, yes. yes, we heard everything. we didn’t mean to, though, we just ran out because-“

“on a scale from 1 to 10 how badly did i fuck it up with y/n?”

god damnit

he should’ve gotten jungkook to come in here and ask yoongi to sign the sheet

jimin immediately presses his lips together and avoids yoongi’s gaze “with all due respect hyung i really don’t think it’s any of my business-“

“i just need you to be honest with me because i have no idea what to do and i-“

“like a 20. like a colossal 20.” jimin blurts out and offers him a shrug when yoongi stares at him in shoCK

twenty????? TWENTY OUT OF TEN

yoongi lets out a groan and leans back against his chair and he stares at the ceiling fan whirring around and around

he presses the heels of his hands into his eyes and curses to himself

“do you like her?”

“of course i like her, you moron.” yoongi scoffs and shoots him a dirty look

“hey you know what i don’t have to help you if i don’t want to.” jimin starts to get up and yoongi reaches out to grab onto his wrist

he lets out a sigh “i’m… i’m sorry. i know you’re just trying to help, i’m just kiNDa all over the place right now”

jimin plops back down on the seat

“so you like her?”

“as we’ve established already yeS i do like her”

“well why don’t you just tell her that?”

“i don’t… i can’t.” yoongi exasperates and tilts his head back before folding his hands on his stomach

“what do you mean?? it’s obvious she likes you back. or she at least likeD you back. i’m not sure about it with the present situation.”

yoongi gives him a warning look

“i’m not… i’m not for people like her, y’know?”

jimin snorts and leans back against the chair “what’s that supposed to mean? are you from mars? are you not human?”

“not like thAt! she’s supposed to be with like… i don’t know, a businessman or a manager or-“

“you’re a businessman aNd a manager-“

“of a car repair shop, jimin. not like some biG shot car repair shop either.”

“you’re overthinking this big time. i’m not going to sit here and deliver a whole speech about you need to follow your heart and all that bullshit - at the end of the day, y/n obviously likes you for you. so get your head out of your ass and talk to her before it’s too late.”

“what if it’s already too late?”

“trust me, it’s not. knowing y/n she probably would’ve broken into the shop in the middle of the night to get her car back if she never wanted to see you again.”

yoongi can’t help but laugh at the sight of you picking a lock with like a gucci hairpin or something

“…can i clock out early because i helped you?”

“absolutely not.”

you spoon a bite of coco puffs into your mouth and chew slowly

yuck

room temperature cereal is not pleasant

mushy cereal is not pleasant either

would not recommend

0/10

you toss the bowl into the sink carelessly and winCe at the loud clank

oops

you haven’t been up to a lot lately in the past twelve days

you go to class

you go home

you do work

you turn netflix on

you eat dinner

you take a shower

you go to bed

time seems to have meshed together nowadays

you just feel so

..,drained

your phone buzzes on the counter and your heart drops to your stomach when you see the contact name

‘min mechanics’

o no

you’re not ready

you don’t want to talk to him

your finger hovers over the decline button but it seems that your finger has a mind of its own because-

“oh shit-“ you pick the phone up as soon as you hit the accept button “hello?” you clear your throat

“y/n? hey! it’s namjoon.” you can’t help but let out a breath of relief because if it was yoongi who called you would not have known how to react

“joon, what’s up?”

“beeper is ready for you!! we polished him up and everything! you can come pick him up whenever you’d like.”

“…you can’t drive him to my place or anything?”

you hear namjoon let out a sigh from the other end of the phone

“i could do that for you… but i think you and yoongi have some things to talk about.”

“i don’t want to talk to him.” you murmur and namjoon hEars the pout in your voice

“i know you don’t, but you know you need to talk to him. it’s definitely going to be awkward but-”

“i don’t even think he wants me around, namjoon. he said it himself, we’re from two different worlds!” you huff and flop down on your bed

“obviously it’s none of my business but i just… yoongi’s happier when you’re around, y’know? and i know for a fact that he makes you just as happy - it’s pretty obvious you two are… into each other, and i just think it’d suck if you let this bump in the road ruin your relationship with him… he’s stubborn, i know…”

“he said a lot of hurtful things, joon.” you feel your eyes starting to water as you’re forCed to relive the memory “like, a lot of hurtful things.”

“i know he did. i- i don’t know what to say about that but you have to believe me when i say yoongi is not that kind of person. just… please come?”

well

it looks like you don’t have much of a choice because you do need your car back

“…i’ll swing by later, joon.”

you heard namjoon let out a breath of relief “that’s great, y/n, that’s so great. i’ll see you later!”

yes

you will noT regret this

plus you do want to clear the air with yoongi even though you hate confrontation

anD you want to apologise because it wasn’t right for you to freak out like that when he was with that other girl

you guys hadn’t established any kind of relationship so it simply didn’t make sense for you to be all bOO-hooey and-

ooH or you could just get a new car so you never have to see him again

maybe you’ll move to greece

live on a vineyard

start your own wine-making business

enjoy fresh pita and hummus and kalamata olives everyday

noPE

don’t do that

don’t throw money at your problems and expect them to go away (even though you can definitely afford to move to greece)

you are noT that cowardly person anymore

“miss? uh, we’re here.” you look out the window and feel your heart starting to race when you see that familiar sign

min mechanics

ok

it’ll be fine

just go in

find namjoon

find beeper

and get the heCk out of here

it was a mistake to wear your boots today because you are doing the complete OPPOSITE of avoiding attention

click clack click clack clickclackclickclackclickclackclickclack

“hey guys” you smile shyly when you pass by the boys

they’re all working together on a convertible and they all look shoCked that you actually came  

aLL the boys are here

which has to mean that yoongi’s around here somewhere

o god

you’re like three seconds away from getting a heart attack

okay nope

just focus

you push the door open and the bell tinkles

“joon,” you are sO relieved to see namjoon sitting behind the counter “sorry i took so long to get here.”

the door to yoongi’s office is closed

thank god

maybe he didn’t come in today

“it’s all good!” namjoon chirps and pulls out a couple sheets of paper from a file before getting up and placing them on the counter ”how have you been? uh, sign here, and here.”

“i’ve been good! a little busy with studying for finals and all that but either than that i’ve been good.” you nod and click the pen “how about you?”

“i’ve been doing well. i’ve been watching these nature documentaries on netflix-“

“-planet earth?” your hand pauses on the sheet and for the firSt time in twelve days you flash a genuine smile

“planet earth!” namjoon laughs lightly “it’s a great series, i love it.”

it’s a good thing you and namjoon have good small-talking skills otherwise it would just be compLETE silence right now

“okay, there you go.” you set the pen down and namjoon takes the sheets from you and double-checks that you signed everything

“i’ll go and get beeper ready for you! just wait here, i’ll be riGht back.”

“wait but-“ before you know it namjoon walks past you and leaves you aloNE in the office and you start chewing on your bottom lip nervously

maybe you can go hide in the washroom til namjoon comes back

yep

sounds like a good plan-

all of a sudden the office door opens and you feel your heart stop

frICK

“hey namjoon have you seen the- …oh, uh…“

“hi.”

“hey.”

a beat of awkward silence goes by

the tension is sO thick and you’ve never been so uncomfortable in your entire life

“i was just- sorry, i was looking for namjoon.”

“oh, he, um, he’s getting bee- my car, he’s getting my car for me.” you clear your throat and gesture towards the front door

“cool, cool.” yoongi slaps a hand against the frame of the door gently and nods

christ this is awkward

what happened to that small-talking skill girL

“alright, y/n! he’s all set and ready to go!” namjoon sticks his head in and he falters when he registers what’s going on

his eyes flicker in between you and yoongi “oh, sorry, was i interrupting-“

“nO no you weren’t! i’m comIng” you move at lightning speed to get as far away from yoongi as possible  

“y/n wait-“ there’s no way in hell yoongi’s going to let you get away agaIN

he’ll find another dang mirror to punch if he lets that happen

namjoon hands him the keys to beeper along with a notepad “you should probably do the final check on the car instead of me”

“yeah, thanks man.” yoongi tucks the notepad into his back pocket before jogging out

“heY jimin did a really good job with the polishing!” you smooth your hands over beeper’s hood “beeper’s blinDing me-“ you turn around and jump in surprise when you see that it’s yoongi standing behind you and not namjoon “….where’s nam-“

“please shut up for like one second.”

ooOOOKAY

noT the greatest opening line!!!!!!!!!!!!

oof

yikes

…,,.yooF

he’s nERVOUS OKAY

he wasn’t expecting to have to deal with this sO quickly

if he’d had known that you were coming today he would’ve prepared some flash cards or something but this is his chance to just be completely real with you and get everything off his chest

“y/n, i’m sorry. really, i am. i’m not very… good with apologies but this is me trying my best.” he clears his throat and he looks like he’s having a hard time collecting everything that he wants to say to you “all the things i said to you… god, i was a complete asshole and you didn’t deserve any of that. i-i didn’t even mean any of that shit i said, y’know? i think i just… i got all weird and insecure because i saw you with jin and i just… it reminded me that we… we’re… i’m… i mean, i’m a mechanic, for crying out loud. i fix cars for a living and he had a damn gold watch that probably costs more than my rent!! i understand if you don’t ever wanna talk to me again, i totally get it, i wouldn’t wanna see me again either after being spoken to like that but i just needed to say sorry to you to let you know that i really, really didn’t mean a word of what i said. you deserve so much better than me.” yoongi shrugs and scratches the back of his neck “i don’t know. it’s stupid. i’m stupid. i don’t-”

“the only difference between you and jin that i really care about is the fact that i don’t like jin, but i… i like you.” you admit shyly and if your face wasn’t red before it certainLy is now “and it doesn’t matter to me that you’re a mechanic, y’know? i’m sorry, too. i said some things that i didn’t mean either… i really appreciated you asking me to hang out with you and the guys and that place wasn’t even that grubby!! i was just being- i don’t know, i think i just mad at you because you.. dId all that with jennie-“

“-which was the worst kiss of my life if that makes you feel any better-“

“i’ll forgive you if you forgive me?” you suggest and yoongi nods enthusiastically

“i will find a way to make it up to you, i swear.”

“also, you’re a moron.”

“wha- well, yeah, i guess i deserve that but-“

“okay now it’s youR turn to shut up for like one second.” you stick your hand up and yoongi clams up immediately “you’re a moron for worrying that i was going to pick jin over you just because he’s a millionaire-“

“he’s a millionaire-!”

“because i could give leSS of a shit about that! you’re really sweet and kind and i think you’re awfully funny aNd not to mention you’re pretty easy on the eyes-“ okay y/n reel it back a bit lmao “a-anyways yeah that’s- look the point is you shouldn’t be insecure over something as silly as your job..,,. in faCt i think the whole mechanic thing is actually kinda sexy”

oKAY that’s noT reeling it back at ALL BUT GREAT GOD JO B you said what you wanted to say

“also…what the hell happened to your hand?”

oh right

yoongi glances down at his wrapped up hand

should he tell you that he punched a side mirror and had a shard of glass stuck in his knuckles

“eh, don’t worry about it. it was just an accident.” he waves it off

hm

you’ll find out soOner or later

“so-“ yoongi clears his throat “…you like me or you like-like me?” yoongi raises a brow and offers you a cocky smirk and you immediately scoff in response and cross your arms before looking in the other direction

“don’t flatter yourself i was just being nice”

“don’t lie to me now” yoongi steps closer to you and hooks a finger under your chin before turning your head so that you’re facing him “you got anything you wanna ask me?”

your eyes immediately widen

well

yes

you have a question for him of course you have a question for him

hoW do you even approach a situation like this do you just bluRt it out????

“do you, um, do you…” you puff your cheeks out in frustration and immediately divert your gaze to the ground

you start toeing at the ground nervously (which is something you haven’t done since you were like 12) while your fingers tug at the hem of your blouse

“like… i-i just… do you… do you like me? …back? do you like me back?” you finAlly get it out of your system and you feel like your entire face is on fire “it’s just… sometimes i get the feeling that you like me and other times i get the feeling that you’re just being friendly and i’ve never really, y’know, i don’t have a lot of experience with this kinda stuff so i just need you to tell me straight up if you like me back or if i’m just being delusional…”

“what do you mean by not having a lot of experience with ‘this kinda stuff’? you mean going out and getting something you want by yourself?” yoongi teases and your cheeks flush even further

wow

now that you two have forgiven each other it seems like he’s reverteD back to his usual self

yoongi likes this

this is a fun game

obviously you’re used to getting what you want with the snap of your fingers

and yoongi is a firm believer in the idea that in order to get what you want you gotta work hard

you gotta put in the effort!!!!

yeah suRe he knows that you like him just as much as he likes you (and thaT gets him super excited)

but he’s not going to give in to you that easy

no no

if you want him you better shoW him that you want him

“well yes buT also i meant like… boy-related experiences? i dunno” god this is humiliating

you hATE this

if you could turn back time you wouldn’t have brought this shit up in the first place you should’ve just hoPPEd into beeper and nyOOmed out of the garage “i haven’t even had my first kiss yet so like- look just teLL me if you like me back or not because i’m about to lose my-“  

“wait- you’ve never been kissed?” yoongi’s brows furrow in confusion and he tilts his head

how is that possible

how is it possible that you’ve never been kissed

ok well

now he feels a little bad for dragging this whole thing out

and also

he’s never seen you so… insecure? before

you can’t even look him in the eye

“are you kidding me?”

what the heck!!!!!!!!!!!

of course he likes you!!!!!

he’s liked you from day one!! when you walked in with your leather booties and your heart-shaped sunglasses and your little ‘hellooOOOoOo’

he liked you even more when you shoved your clobbered side mirror into his chest and insisted he fix your car right now immediately

and he liked you even even more when jungkook was straight up flexing in front of you but all you were paying attention to was him with your bottom lip tucked in between your teeth and your cheeks all pink and rosy

that was for him

all for him

“well you don’t have to say it like thAt” you grumble and reach up to scratch at the back of your neck “look thiS was stupid just forget i said anythi-“

“i like you back. i definitely like you back.” yoongi admits casually as he scribbles something on his little notepad

“you- oh. okay.”

ok

you didn’t think thiS far ahead

what’s your next move

uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

“so what are you gonna do about it?” yoongi tucks his notepad into his pocket and crosses his arms before looking at you expectantly

uHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

he pokes his tongue into his cheek and tilts his head when you continue to stand there and stare at him blankly like a deer in headlights “ah. so you’re not going to do anything about it. alright.” he sighs and turns to head back to the office “i’m just going to bring namjoon back out here and he’ll take care of-“

and before you know it you’re grabbing onto his wrist and yanking him back and-

yoongi feels like his heart is about to explode when you pull him down and press your lips against his

his eyes flutter shut and he places his hands on your hips and gives you a gentle squeeze

your arms are wrapped loosely around his neck and you pull away with flushed cheeks

oh god

u just kissed yoongi

thAt was your first kiss

mission success!!!!!!!!!

“…there, i did something about it” you grumble and puLL your arms back

and then it hits you

oh my god i just kissed yoongi and woW his lips are like supEr soft and he tastes like cherry which makes sense because he loves those lollipops-

“you’re so cute.” yoongi laughs and nudges you back til you’re sitting on beeper’s hood

you’re pretty sure you’re not supposed to be sitting on beeper

“what are you doing? i-“

you know what you could care leSS about beeper because yoongi’s kiSsing you!!!! again!!!

AGAIN!!!!!!!!!

:~)

you have your fingers curled up in yoongi’s jumpsuit as you kiss him back and you let out a little whimper

yoongi’s thumbs circle your kneecaps before they drag a cheEky trail up the inside of your thighs

he squeezes your thighs and encourages you to open them wide enough so that he can stand in between them

“you good?” he mutters against your lips and you nod quickly and pull him closer

goD you’re so CUTE

he’s so soft for you it’s insane

he pulls your hand away from his jumpsuit and brings it up so that you can wrap your fingers around the nape of his neck

you immediately slide your hand up and tangle your fingers into his soft locks “there you go”

yoongi pulls away from you and revels in the small whimper that you let out

god

aren’t you a vision

your lips are swollen and glossy and your eyes are all blown out and your cheeks are warm and rosy

all that just from a little bit of kissing

“why’d you stop?” you pout and tug at his wrist

“you’d pass out if i continued.” he smirks and tucks a strand of hair behind your ear “and it appears we have an audience, don’t we?” he gets a little louder towards the end of his question and you immediately twist around to look behind you

sure enouGH the boys are all crouched behind a truck staring at the two of you like a bunch of PERVS

they immediately break off and pretend like they weren’t just watching you guys maKe out with each other

jungkook and taehyung bump into each other in their rush to head back to their stations and you snort at the sight

you turn back to face yoongi

“it was probably a good thing we were interrupted” yoongi leans down and gives you another quick kiss before helping you off the hood of the car

“what makes you say that?”

“i was fully ready to go down on you on top of-“

“bEEPER??” you gasp in mock horror and slap your hands over the top of beeper’s hood “you were going to defile me on top of my own car??”

“i mean…” yoongi shrugs before nodding

take you over the hood of your car?

heck yeah he would

he’d take you over the hood of anY car

“don’t listen to him beeper,.,.,. i’d neVer do that to you…”

if yoongi didn’t know any better it’d probably be safe to say that you might be a little tOo in love with beeper

yoongi is a busy man

he has a lot of cars he has to patch up and a lot of parts he has to put together

but uh

making out with u in the driver’s seat of his truck is a much better way to pass the time

he’ll just get the others to take care of the parts for him later

“u know i’m supposed to be replacing a muffler right now…” yoongi lifts his face and brushes his lips against yours teasingly

you can’t help but grin when you pull away slightly and yoongi squeezes your waist in warning

“u know that sounds like a you problem” your nose nudges against his and yoongi tilts his head upwards to kiss you again

since the two of you made up and forgave each other you’ve been visiting the shop moRe than three to four times a week

you practically live at the shop now

and yoongi doesn’t know if that’s a good or a bad thing

on one hand he likes having you around and he likes getting to kiss u whenever he wants

but on the other hand

it’s vEry distracting having you around and getting to kiss u whenever he wants because he aLways wants to kiss you

another bAd thing

whenever he kisses you the others get all oOoOooohHHhHhhh and yoongi is always so tempted to hurl a wrench at all of them

anyways

yoongi’s on his lunch break (that ended twenty minutes ago) and he decided to sneak you into his truck that’s parked in the back alley

his lips move with yours slowly and he revels in the little whimper that leaves you when he nips at your bottom lip

you’re acting extra cute for somE reason

and you look extra cute too

you’re wearing a pretty floral romper paired with your faVourite boots and once again you will never admit to anybody that it took you an hour and a half (you’re getting better) to throw it on

you decide that you’re going to be bold today and you find your hands slowly sliding down yoongi’s chest til they reach the buckle of his belt

yoongi reaches down quickly and wraps his slim fingers around your wrist before offering you a smirk and a tilt of his head “someone’s a little eager, no?”

“don’t you want me?” you push your bottom lip out in a pout and yoongi leans in to give you a lil peck

“course i do.” he chuckles lowly before raising a brow “but how about we start off with something more mild, hm?” he tucks a strand of hair behind your ear before his fingers glide down your jaw and he hooks one under your chin

“like what?” you lean down a little and nip at his fingers playfully and yoongi has never felt more fuckiGn endeared in his life

“do you trust me?”

“course i do.” you drape your arms around his shoulders

“alright, let’s just get you settled right here…” he lifts you up off his lap and onto his right leg instead

his.,., thigh?

you separate your legs so each knee settles on the leather seat on either side of his clothed thigh

ur not..,,.s ure what’s going on right now

but it’s once you get comfortable that you begin to feel the friction

“now what do i- oH-“ you gasp noisily when yoongi’s leg presses upwards and suddenly you spaSm a bit of out of surprise  

tingles shoot up your spine and your fingers twitch slightly on yoongi’s chest

“that feel good?”

“i- i’m not sure yet.” you blink down at yoongi’s thigh and he can’t help but laugh

“need me to help?”

“that would be ideal, yes.”

“well, it’s pretty easy. you just-“ he places his hands on your waist and pushes you back and imMediately you feel another spark of pleasure “and then you come this way,” he pulls you back and flexes his thigh underneath you and you let out a little hiccup

how..,,.intriguing

eventually you get the hang of things

you’re kinda doing it on your own but yoongi’s still guiding you back and forth a little

“that’s it, doll, just like that,” yoongi breathes out, his grip tightening on your waist as he helps you ride his leg

he leans back against the seat and watches you with hooded eyes as you continue to get yourself off on his thigh

your romper and your panties are botH very thin so you can just feel the rough fabric of yoongi’s jeans rubbing up against you

you’re not going too hard but you’re not going too soft either

yoongi swallows thickly because now he has a pretty good picture of what you’d look like riding his c-

“christ-“ you gasp as yoongi raises his leg and pushes riGht up into you as he leans in and attaches his mouth to your neck

“now does it feel good?” he murmurs against you and you gasp and wrap your fingers around the nape of his neck

you can’t even describe how amazing this feels and all your thoughts are just white noise because holy shit this feels so good

you nod quickly and let out a whimper when you feel another wave of pleasure tremor through your body

god

you’re so soft n warm

and so submissive

“yoongi, please...” you don’t even know what you’re pleading for here but that’s all that’s able to come out of your mouth

he looks down and groans quietly when he notices the damp patch on his jeans

“oh,” yoongi coos mockingly, “you sweet thing, you... i wanna wreck you.”

you let out a whine and press your forehead against his shoulder as you continue grinding down on his thigh

your desperation pulls a low moan from yoongi’s throat and he shifts underneath you

“there you go, baby… such a good girl…”

look

you’re not entirely sure what happened here

but somehow you shifted from yoongi’s thigh to yoongi’s crotch

and yoongi just wanted to make this about you so he also doesn’t know how this happened but boY is he glad it happened

you’re literally going to make him cream his pants like a overly-hormonal 14 year old boy and he hasn’t done that in a long loNG TIME but you know what he does noT mind

“ah, fuck-“ yoongi growls and clenches his jaw as his calloused fingers dig into your supple flesh as you continue grinding down on him

you know how yoongi mentioned earlier he had a rough idea of what you’d look like riding him

well now he has a really reALLY clear idea of what you’d look like riding him

he can tell you’re close by the way your breathing has gotten heavier and your cheeks have become more flushed

and he is definitely going to keep this image of you tucked in his brain for safekeeping

you grow dizzy from pleasure and all of your senses are in ovErdrive and all you can think of is yoongi yoongi yoongi yooNGi

“yoonGi, i think i- nngh, yoongi-!“ yoongi’s hand slides up your thigh and curves your waist before he’s gripping at your ass to mould you to him

“look at you, you pretty little thing,” yoongi groans when your hips stutter

you’re driving him absolutely wild  

“lemme hear you, doll, nice n loud for me-“

yoongi is panting because goddamN you really seem like you want him to come before you  

he can bArely keep it together but there’s no way he’s going to come first

he pushes you down on him and lifts his hips up at the same time and you throw your head back with a breathless moan

“i-i- oh, t-that feels really- hAh-“ yoongi sucks a hickey into your skin and continues forcing you down on him

“you have no idea how badly i wanna be inside of you-“ he growls lowly and that does the trick

your toes curl as you’re finaLLY pushed over the edge and you swear you see black dots in your vision, whimpering through your release  

the sound of you gasping his name out and the sight of you trembling above him is what eventually gets to yoongi and he curses to himself as he reaches his high and gasps your own name in return

you feel a warm gush from underneath you and your eyes widen at the wet spot on yoongi’s crotch area

he gives you a few final thrusts before he slides his hands down from your waist so that they rest on the tops of your thighs  

you’re still breathing heavily as you lean down to press your forehead against his

“hi.” yoongi grins and gives u a little kiss and you immediately shy away from him and he feels his heart practically exploDe in his chest

“hi.” you murmur as you keep your gaze on the silver chain around his neck

you reach down to fiddle with it because you don’t know whaT to do now

yoongi reaches up and hooks a finger underneath your chin so that he can finally catch your gaze “you okay?”

you nod shyly and feel your cheeks flush again

“what’s gotten into you, hm?” yoongi teases and leans in to give you another quick kiss “ya can’t get all shy on me now when you were humping me like a rabbit in heat literally thirty seconds ago”

“yOoNgI”

“no but really!! what’s up?”

“i just like u a lot” you admit and your nose scrunches

yoongi grins and feels his heart skip a beat

he reaches up and pinches your nose and you immediately scowl and flick his hand away

“i like you too, doll.”

out of all the mechanic shops in the city

you are vEry happy that beeper decided to run out of gas a minute away from min mechanics

:-)

so

here’s the deal

you asked yoongi to teach you how to change a tire and he was understandably vEry confused because on a list of things that you would never want to do he thinks it’s pretty safe to assume that ‘change a tire’ is on that list

he told you that if you ever got a flat tire all you’d need to do is call him and he’d come to save the day

but you defended your decision saying that you thought it was good for you aND it was an important life skill

because it is!!!! kinda??

for someone who was very adamant on learning how to change a tire you don’t seem to be paying much attention to the actual changing of the tire

“remember? righty tighty, lefty loosie.” yoongi places his hands over yours and helps you turn the wrench

he has a hand placed on your waist as he hovers over you from behind and your mouth tugs up in a subtle smirk when you feel him push himself against your bum (it wasn’t on purpose though because he’s just trying to get that lug nut loose since it’s screwed in real tight)

“righty loosie lefty tighty i got it”

.,.,,.,.,he’s sure you’ll figure it out eventually

“i’ll be back in twenty minutes to check up on you!”

“wait but don’t you wanna stay here to watch-“

“twenty minutes!” you scowl as you watch yoongi head back to the office

what the heCK

your plan has been foiled

you didn’t actually want to have to change aLL the tires!!!!!!!

you nearly fall flat on your ass when you give give the next lug nut a firm yaNk

aLas nothing happens

you don’t know how you’re supposed to change four tires when you can barely handle four lug nuts

aH

maybe if you put some grease around them they’ll be easier to unscrew

wow

you’re a genius

“did you manage to change all the-“

oh

now yoongi knows why you like it when he has smudges of grease all over his hands and his face

you’re gloWing from the exertion of changing tires and your (his) shirt is riding up a bit because you tied it up into a little knot

and he didn’t notice this earlier but your butt looks reALLy good in those jeans

“i did it! i changed every single tire on my own!!!” you wipe your hands on the rag before giving one of the tires a firm kick “look at these bAd boys! c’mon c’mon give me another set of tires to change that was so FUN” you bounce up and down on excitedly

you reach up to wipe your cheek with the back of your hand

“you should take a break and join me in my office!” yoongi takes your hand and starts dragging you towards the office

ya he’s 110% going to go down on you in his office

“or-“ you pull back a little and make him stop walking “oR you can give me another set of tires to change and you can go back to your office?”

yoongi freezes

.,,.what?

“you… you want to change more tires?”

“mhm!!”

“but i just- you don’t wanna go into my office?”

“why would i want to go to your office? there are no tires for me to change there.”

“.,,.go talk to hoseok to see if he has any cars for you to-“

“okAY BYE”

o god

he’s created a monster

ah

finals season

a wonderful time where students are forced to coop themselves up and build fortresses out of their notes and textbooks

you’re not sure how you survived through your finals considering you had like fiVe of them

but the point is

you are DONE

you’re finally done!!!!! you’re FREE

a downside to finals (adding to the other many maNy downsides of finals) is that you forced yourself to stay away from yoongi (and u made him promise not to come see you even tho he really reaLLy wanted to come see you) because you didn’t want to be distracted and min yoongi is a big big distraction

which means you haven’t seen yoongi in nearly two weeks

you’ve texted him and you’ve called him but the phone calls are brief and the text messages are short because time is precious when it comes to exams!!!!

it might not seem like it but you are (surprisingly) vEry studious

yoongi called u a nerd when he face-timed you one night and you were wearing your thick reading glasses because your eyes were starting to give up on you from like 6 hours of staring at your laptop  

“heLLooOOoooo” yoongi perks up when he hears a very familiar voice

he pokes his head up over the raised hood of the car

ah

theRE you are

yoongi grins from ear to ear when he sees you bouncE excitedly into the shop like a little bunny

once you spot him your eyes liGHT UP

“yoongi!!!!!!!!! i missed u!!!!!”

“yeah, baby? you missed me?” yoongi tosses the rag over his shoulder “how much did you miss me?” he teases and wraps an arm around your waist before pulling you closer

“missed you a whole lot.” you breathe out and your eyes flicker down to the lollipop in his mouth

“how were your finals?”

“they were good…” you’re barely paying attention to what yoongi’s saying because all you can focus on is how slick n red yoongi’s lips are

and then

a lightbulb appears above your head

“that’s great! i’ll take you out for ice cream as soon as i-“

you yank the lollipop out of his mouth and yoongi squawks in surprise

and then you’re wrapping your lips around the bright red sweet in a manner that seems far from innocent “what flavour is this?” you hum around the lollipop

yoongi’s mouth goes dry and he swallows thickly “cherry, i-i think. cherry.”

you pull it out from your lips with a pop and stick it back into yoongi’s mouth “i like strawberry more.” you wiggle out of his grip before patting his cheek “alright, i’ll leave you alone now!”

“oh nO you don’t-“ yoongi’s hand darts out and he grabs onto your wrist before tugging you backwards “what makes you think you can get away with doing something like that so easily???”

“because you like me and ur not going to do anyThing about it” you giggle when his fingers dig into your sides playfully

yoongi pauses and raises a brow at you

“…is that a challenge?”

“you tell me” you shrug innocently

you know

you should really learn to keep your mouth shut sometimes

or maybe not

because you’re in a preTty nice situation right now

“you’ll stay nice n quiet for me, won’t you, doll?” yoongi hums against your neck

your skin burns with his touch as he slides his hand over the tops of your thighs before he’s nudging your knees apart so he can settle in comfortably

“no promises.” you giggle softly when you feel his hands sliding underneath your sundress

yoongi pauses all of a sudden and you’re abOUt to retract your statement but then-

“gimme a sec. i’ll be back.”

o

ok

you hear him leave the room and close the door behind him and you start swinging your legs back n forth

and then you stop

oh god

you hope he’s not like.,.,,. puniShing you or anything

he’s not mean enough to leave you high and dry like this right

.,,.,.,.right

yoongi shuts the door behind him as he comes back in

he’s hiding something behind his back

“whatcha got there?”

he takes your chin in between his pointer finger and his thumb and then he taps your bottom lip gently with his thumb “open.”

you part your lips slightly

yoongi slides a lollipop into your mouth and you immediately hum contently

peaches and cream!!!!!!!!

needless to say the lollipop actually does a pretty solid job at keeping you quiet

well

kinda

yoongi might have to pull out his spare bandana or something for extrA reinforcements but he’s kind of preoccupied right now

yoongi’s tattooed arm wraps around your middle and he has a hand gripping your hip as he presses you flush to him

“yoOngi- oh, god, yoongi-“ you gasp

he buries his face in your neck before starting to kiss and suck marks into your skin

“so fucking tight-“ yoongi grunts and you nEarly crunch down on the lollipop when he hits that golden spot

“mmpH-“ you suck exTra hard around the lollipop when yoongi picks up the pace

you can barely keep yourself up

you’re tempted to just floP down on the desk and let him have you like that

each snap of his hips against your lower back is more powerful than the next

ur literally going to break a tooth this lollipop thing was not a good idea

you yank it out of your mouth and it drops to the desk with a clatter

also it was making you drool big time and you don’t know if that’s a particularly sexy look or not

honestly you’re pretty sure yoongi doesn’t care whether you’re loud or not because yOU could care less about your volume

“f-fuck, yoongi,” your eyes roll to the back of your head when yoongi’s hand slithers in between your legs “oh, my god-“ your knuckles turn white as you grip the sides of his desk

“too loud, baby,” yoongi smirks as he nips at your shoulders gently

“s-sorry, ‘m sorry- nngh-“ you can feel his stomach muscles clenching against your back and that only spurs you on

“you gonna cum for me, hm?” you can hear the strain in his voice and you can’t help but feel a liTTle cocky now that you know you have just as much of an effect as he has on you

“c’mon, be a good girl n cum for me…” he rasps against the shell of your ear and that’s all it takes for you to completely loSe it

you immediately slump against the desk as your arms give out

you’re a whimpering mess as yoongi continues fucking you through your orgasm

his hand falls from in between your legs to grip your hip again and he presses soothing kisses along your back

“i wouldn’t suggest going in there if i were you.” namjoon warns as jimin approaches the door to the general office

“why not? and why.,.,. are you sitting out here instead of at the counter.,,.,.”  

“why do you think?”

“yoOngi- oh, god, yoongi-“

jimin gawks and yanks his hand away from the door handle as if it shOcked him “do- do they know we’re all still here???”

“yep.” namjoon hums nonchalantly and flips to the next page of his book “just give ‘em some time.”

“how muCH time??”

“i think half an hour will suffice.”

“by the sounds of it it seems like they’re going to want more than half an hour.” jimin mutters  

okay

you’re pretty sure jungkook was a serial killer in his past life

“sTOP IT yOU PSYCHOPATH” you shriek and make your fouRth round sprinting around the garage

jungkook cackles with glee behind you as he continues pointing the electric drill at you and pushing down on the trigger

you haven’t looked behind you but you can heAR the vRRRt vRt vRRRRTttTTT and you are scared out of your MIND

you made an offhand comment about how you feel like you should start working out and jungkook graciously offered to help you with some cardio

but you didn’t know what would mean him chasing you around the garage threatening to drill a hole into your head

and at first it was funny but now you genuinely think he wants to screw you (not like thAt)

“ooF-“ you stumble riGht into yoongi’s chest and you would’ve fallen flat on your ass had he not reached out and grabbed onto you

“what the hell are you doing??? that’s so dangerous!” yoongi snaps as jungkook finally catches up to you “if you’re going to waste your time by goofing off i’ll make you stay extra late to clean the washrooms - and that goes the same for you, miss ‘i need to finish my essay’.”

uM

why are you getting scolded??? you don’t even woRK here

maybe they’re all psychopaths and its just taken you a while to notice

“oh pLease like you weren’t goofing off earlier” jungkook grumbles and hands the drill over to yoongi

“what are you talking about?”

“don’t act like you weren’t fucking y/n into next week like two hours ago-“

yoongi gives him a warning look and-

vRT VRT

jungkook screeches

ok ya that was not enjoyable now he can see why you were so terrified

“yOoOooooonGGGGGiiiIiI-“

“y/n, i’m really, really busy right now” yoongi points out as he gestures to all the parts lying around him

“i know, but i need you to come here for a sec!!!!” he can SEE how big your pout is even though you’re halfway across the garage

“can’t you wait for like another 20 minutes-“

“pLeEEeEEeeeEEAAaaAaaASssSssEEEEe-“

yoongi lets out a huff and rolls his eyes playfully because he’s pretty sure you’re not going to cut it out if he doesn’t go over to you right now

hoseok snorts when he sees you pull out the puppy dog eyes

“you go take care of that, i’m sure we’ll survive without you for five minutes”

cLAnK

yoongi and hoseok both whIp their heads around to the source of the sound and jungkook’s standing there with a sheepish smile on his face

he just dropped a fuel filter it’s not a big deal

“alright, i’ll be right back.” yoongi tosses the rag over his shoulder before jogging over to you

“what’s up?”

you flip to the next page of the magazine without looking up at yoongi

“i’d like a lollipop please.”

//……r u kidding

yoongi’s eyes flicker to the office door “…you’re like 10 steps away from the office. i was halfway across the garage.”

you put the magazine down and pout up at him “please? strawberry, preferably.”

yoongi narrows his eyes at you and crosses his arms “why am i doing this for you again?”

“because you like me” you respond simply and shrug casually

“ah, i guess you got me there.” he leans down and you grin exciTedly because u always like kissing yoongi

you instinctively lean up and purse your lips

but you’re moRe than surprised when he doesn’t kiss you but hovers over your mouth instead

“you have feet. get one for yourself.” he murmurs lowly

he gives your top lip a gentle little kith before patting your cheek and heading back to the boys

wha-

okay noW you’re definitely getting your dad to sue min mechanics

[tss-grimmverse]

Chapter 1: Clematis

i walk a lonely road

the only one that i have ever known

Virgil stepped into the strange apartment.

It was quiet. Not a mere absence of sound, but a quiet that breathed deep and blanketed the senses like a nighttime pillow. It was a quiet that examined every scuff and rustle and soft exhalation with cool curiosity. It listened, with the hush of trees in the night.

It watched, with the perilous regard of faeries.

Virgil let out a breath he hadn’t realized he’d been holding; probably had been holding since leaving Ohio two days before. After multiple bus rides across multiple states and hours and hours of strangers and suitcases and stress…despite how it put his paranoid senses on edge, he was glad of the quiet, away from open spaces and curious eyes.

But the apartment was also dark, and a little cold, and its owner was painfully conspicuous by his absence.

The place belonged to a half-faery named Logan Ursae: who, according to the Youngstown Grimms, was a friend of the organization that they trusted to provide pursued changelings a place to run to and start over.

Changelings like Virgil.

Virgil, who would rather be with his Ren Faire troupe back in Ohio. The reappearance of his old faery master had brought his scarce two years of freedom to an abrupt end.

The Grimms were a loose organization of former faery thralls; humans kidnapped as children, who’d lived in Arcadia for so long that their bodies had absorbed faery magic and made them something not quite fae, but more than human. Blessed…or cursed, depending on who you asked…with strange and erratic and often dangerous powers. Those that joined the Grimms used those powers to help other humans escape and integrate, as best they could, back into the human world.

And, occasionally, they worked to protect said thralls when their former faery masters came looking for them.

Now here Virgil stood, in some ordinary human apartment, owned by an absent half-blood with a human name, in some middle-of-nowhere city in hot, muggy Florida, a thousand miles from everyone he knew.

Figures, the guy isn’t even here when I show up. He tugged his oversized black plaid hoodie tighter around himself. It’s not like I’m ever anyone’s top priority.

“Uh, hey?” he called, flipping a light switch. “Anyone home?”

Silence.

Virgil rolled his eyes.

Despite his relief at not having to answer questions or make small talk with a stranger, Logan’s absence unsettled him. What kind of person apparently regularly took in changelings on the run, but couldn’t be arsed to actually be around when they turned up on his doorstep? If Virgil’d had any other place to go, he’d have turned around and walked right back out the door on principle.

Instead he huffed out a sigh and let his ratty duffle bag slide to the floor. He’d meet this mysterious Logan eventually; assuming, of course, that his pursuer didn’t track him down in the night and finish what he’d begun years ago in Arcadia.

It would be no more than I deserve.  

Logan Ursae’s apartment was spacious and clean, making Virgil uncomfortably aware of his own travel-mussed, unwashed state. Hopefully the half-faery wouldn’t care if he used the shower…well, if he wanted to lay down rules, he should’ve been here to do it.

The foyer spilled into a modest living room, with a navy sectional couch and a low coffee table, several standing lamps, a hallway presumably leading to the bedrooms, and the dining space off in its own niche to the right. Practically every wall in the place housed a heavily-laden bookshelf or three; an inconceivable number of books to Virgil, who’d lived either on the road or on the run his whole life. He wandered to the oval dining table, trailing fingerpads across classy pale wood and a dark blue runner.

A half empty water dish with ‘Nic’ spelled out in neat cursive sat against the far wall…but there were no other signs of pets. If Logan did have a dog or something, it was as absent as its owner.

A low counter separated a small galley kitchen from the rest of the apartment, navy towels hanging evenly from the oven handle and blue, galaxy-themed pot holders hanging under the cabinets.

The guy clearly had a thing for the color blue.

Even the curious scent that hung in the air smelled blue to Virgil’s changeling-sensitive nose, tickling at his senses in an explosion of color. Dark teal skies and rich bronze bark against a background of earthy brown, a combination that made his mind hazy in a pleasant way. Subtle and masculine, but more middle-note than the patchouli oil Virgil himself liked to wear.

He inhaled slowly, unconsciously imagining that scent against a warm masculine neck, and wondered where the hell that thought came from.

Maybe you’re just gay, Virgil, he groused to himself.

In place of a television, Logan’s living room held a large, intricately carved wooden cabinet; the antique kind, waist-high, with drawers and two swinging doors. On top of this sat an old fashioned record player with a huge brass horn. The setup could have easily graced a 50s movie set; both cabinet and player were heavy and solid and gleamed with care.

Virgil idly pawed through the impressive vinyl collection on the shelf above, recognizing a few artists, and then knelt to see if there were any more inside the cabinet.

“I’ll thank ye not to touch that,” a voice said.

Virgil’s heart skittered up into his throat. He whirled.

A creature no more than two feet tall leaned against the coffee table, tiny brown arms folded over a sturdy brown chest, covered by a tunic that looked to be messily stitched from several colored hand towels. Their feet were bare and covered in brown wispy hair. Gender was impossible to determine.

Their face was framed by a mop of more wispy hair and a tall hat that, weirdly, looked like it had been made from burlap and a Starbucks cup. A pair of black sunglasses sat on a red, upturned nose, nearly obscuring a pair of black, beady, glaring eyes under expressive eyebrows.

Fae, Virgil’s mind whispered. Fae, Fae, there’s a Fae in the house they’ll tell Deceit where I am what do I do…?

No. He was overreacting. It was just a house brownie. A solitary. Generally harmless.

Virgil took a breath and relaxed his shoulders, which had tensed up at being startled.

“You always sneak up on people?” he asked, mirroring the small faery’s crossed-arm stance.

“You always go poking about in people’s houses?” the brownie countered in a high, sassy voice, the faintest hint of a baroque staining the syllables.

“I’m not poking; I have a key. S’not my fault Logan’s not here—”

“I meant what’s behind you,” the brownie nodded toward the cabinet, “ye daft changeling. I know the Bear is expecting company. Do what ye want in the rest of the apartment, but keep clear of my house.”

Oh.

Virgil shuffled away from the cabinet, trying to recall what little he knew about domestic Fae. Don’t insult them. Leave gifts; never leave them payment. Don’t watch them do chores. Don’t give them clothes.

Nothing about trying to make conversation with one; unfortunate, since Virgil sucked at making conversation in general.

“Sorry,” he grumbled. “Just…don’t like being surprised.”

The brownie peeked over their sunglasses…why would a Fae wear sunglasses?…and ran beady eyes over Virgil’s faded purple hair and messy eyeshadow, his ripped jeans and faded black hoodie, seemingly content to let him squirm under the scrutiny.

“Um, no offense,” Virgil muttered, rubbing his neck. “But your kind don’t usually show themselves to humans.”

The brownie plopped onto the coffee table.

“Well, I see no humans here,” they quipped, leaning forward. “Do you, changeling?”

Virgil instinctively ducked his head, letting his bangs obscure his eyes…eyes that, like all changelings, held a narrow ring of color around each pupil. Worse, Virgil’s changeling eyes were heterochromatic, setting him apart even from his own kind. Besides his natural dark brown, he bore a dark green ring around his left pupil, and a striking purple one around his right.

Wearing his hair long in the front helped, but they still drew attention.

He hated attention.

If there was one thing Fae were good at, it was needling at your insecurities. Brownies and hobgoblins and other solitaries, like all faeries, enjoyed their little games.

“Technically changelings are human,” Virgil grumbled. “We’re just kept in Arcadia for so long that the magic just kind of—”

“Bleeds into ye?” The brownie swung their legs, making their mop of hair sway. “Soaks into your teeth and sinew until ye can alter the Contracts same as they can?”

Virgil frowned. “If that means ‘do magic’, then yeah.”

“I live with a half-blood, lad,” the brownie pointed out, still in that sassy tone, licking their knobby teeth. “I know of your Grimms. I know you’re here for the Bear to keep safe, because your master tried to snatch ye back up. What’re you called, then, eh?”

“Um,” Virgil stalled, swallowing.

It was never a good idea to give a Fae one’s real name, but if Logan and the little Fae had a close relationship, Virgil didn’t dare insult the brownie by lying to them. He suspected if this one knew why he was here, they knew his name already.

“Virgil,” he admitted softly.

The brownie smiled, removing their sunglasses to bare their face properly.

“Mmm. Then you may call me Remy,” they said with a small nod, flourishing the glasses and parking them back on their nose. “He/him pronouns.”

Virgil nodded, guessing he’d passed some test.

Remy folded his arms again.

Neither spoke for a long, uncomfortable minute…long enough for Virgil’s skin to crawl. Logan’s brownie seemed friendly enough, but Virgil wasn’t too keen to start befriending every faery he happened across. He also despised awkward silences, and small talk, and making nice with a stranger when he was worn down and grimy from travel and ready to curl up somewhere and just sleep.

“Look, uh, Remy,” Virgil said at last, picking at his sleeves. “Did Logan know I was coming tonight?”

“You want to know why he’s not here to meet ye?” Remy shrugged. “I could explain, or,” and he gestured to a neatly folded sheet of paper on the coffee table, “you could hear it from the Bear himself.”

Virgil rolled his eyes and snatched up the note.

He could’ve have led with that, the little bastard. He ignored Remy’s knowing chuckle and unfolded the note with a little more force than necessary. Delicate, slanted script covered the paper, the lines so straight they looked like they’d been made with a ruler.

‘Salutations,’

Virgil raised an eyebrow. Really? We’re leading with that?

‘If you are reading this, Virgil, then I extend my sincerest apologies for my absence upon your arrival. An emergency has called me away. Though I advised your Grimm sponsors of this as soon as I could, you had already begun your journey, and, as you have no phone, there was no way to inform you.

Remy was right about this note being enlightening. Virgil hoped the guy didn’t actually talk like this.

‘(We must remedy this issue upon my return; due to the circumstances of your relocation, I insist upon having a reliable means to contact you.)’

Patronizing, too. Great.

‘The room on the left is yours. There are clean sheets on the bed and towels in the bathroom. I trust you have brought your own toiletries.’

Virgil frowned. Either Logan was one of those people who believed not brushing one’s teeth after every meal was barbaric, or he was afraid Virgil would steal his shampoo or something.

Whatever.

‘Also, please do not move the bowl on the counter, and if you find it empty, if you could fill it with the cream you’ll find in the fridge, I would much appreciate it. The house brownie may or may not choose to introduce himself to you; he tends to spend most of his time sleeping. If he does come out, please be polite.’

Virgil glanced up and was unsurprised to see that Remy had vanished. Brownies generally came and went as they pleased and stayed out of sight; he already knew he was fortunate Remy had shown himself at all.

‘I advise you to stay inside the apartment until my return. You will find both the fridge and the pantry stocked; please make yourself at home. I expect to return sometime the night of the 12th, and look forward to meeting you then.

Logan’

‘P.S. Do not touch the Crofters.’

Well, August 12th would be over in about an hour, so it didn’t look like he’d be meeting Logan that night. Virgil refolded and pocketed the note, sighing again. He found Remy’s bowl and refilled it as instructed, but figured he probably wouldn’t see the little brownie again until Logan returned…if then.

Meanwhile, he might as well get settled.

The room mentioned in the note held a twin bed, a nightstand with a lamp, and a small deck with a chair. Not much, but the bedspread looked new and he had his own closet. Virgil, having lived in a tent before this, was very much not complaining.

After unpacking his clothes (black, very dark gray, more black, a little purple…what, so he had a certain aesthetic), he carefully unearthed his two most valued possessions: a beat-up tackle box full of smushed, well-used acrylic paints, and a roll of brushes and palette knives. In his escape, he’d had to leave his all sketchbooks and paintings behind…but he knew he was lucky to have saved any of his art supplies at all.

Virgil sat heavily on his bed, the last seventy-two hours finally starting to catch up.

The sheer terror of seeing his former faery master strolling through that Renaissance Faire like he owned the place.

Him bolting to his tent and throwing everything he could into his duffle.

Running, with no real plan, nowhere in particular to go, just away.

He was lucky that a Grimm had stumbled upon him at that farmer’s market and taken him to a safe house, one of many, set up all over the country. He was lucky those Grimms were in contact with the Founders…the original Grimm team…and through them, Logan.

He was lucky.

He’d already escaped hell once. He wasn’t sure he’d survive under Deceit’s thumb again. Working until his fingers bled and his eyes burned with exhaustion, second guessing every word, every gesture, every silence, never knowing day to day if he’d be slapped or fed, coddled or tortured…

Virgil shuddered, wrapping arms around himself and exhaling carefully. He’d endured over twenty hours of traveling without having a panic attack. It would suck to fall into one now that he was, for the moment, safe.

At least, he hoped so.

For lack of anything else to do, Virgil showered in the guest bathroom (with his own shampoo, thank you very much, Mr. Bring-Your-Own-Toiletries), and dressed for bed. , It was barely midnight and his eyelids already felt heavy, and normally he considered 2am “early”. He read through Logan’s stilted, precise note again, frowning the odd post script before setting it on the nightstand and switching off the lamp.

What in the Arcadian hell is a ‘Crofters’?

Clematis: rest, safety

[shirtlesssammy]

9x05: Dog Dean Afternoon

Welcome to our last hellatus recap. This is one of our themed episodes and it’s not too late to guess what that is. You’ll win bragging rights forever! Anyway, our show is back tomorrow!

Then:

Obligatory Teddy Bear shot of how AbsUrD this show can be. Note to Show: Don’t highlight the absurdity of this show when you’re about to air a so-so episode. 

Now:

As a very dedicated taxidermist works on his Game of Thrones masterpieces, his very smart, very loyal German Shepherd, Colonel, alerts him to danger. They head through the halls of stuffed animals (but they’re all fake because who the fuck is stuffing these bears and shit? Also, a dog? Aren’t tigers endangered? WTF is all this?). Anyway, a man with a snake tongue attacks the taxidermist and Colonel sees it all. 

At the bunker, Sam’s got a case.

Once at the Taxidermy shop, they find it covered in red paint, and a little paw print symbol. Sam takes a picture.

Agents and Michaels and Deville enter the crime scene. And by crime, I mean all the dead animals. WTF? Like. WTF? Let’s assume all these animals died of natural causes, so we can pretend the victim was “a good egg.” Sam heads off to tour the place and Dean stops to interview Mr. Stevens. As Dean learns about “entrails” and such, Sam looks over the merch. 

Poor Dean Bean continues to have frightening reminders about why he’s a germaphobe. 

The boys are thinking witch, but decide to keep digging. 

At their motel, Sam discovers the “wiccan symbol” is really an animal right’s group symbol. (LOL, I totally don’t remember this episode and I’m totally NOT changing my caption from above.) 

Dean and Sam head to a vegan bakery where we learn that Dean knows the smell of Patchouli. Yeah, you might mask that with disdain for non-meat eaters, Dean, but we see you. They head to interrogate Olivia and Dylan, two founding members of S.N.A.R.T., the animal right’s group. They’re wearing sunglasses inside, so Dean thinks they’re douchebags. The brothers flash their badges. The couple sits down to talk about the victim. “You know how hunters are. They’re selfish dicks who define themselves by what they kill.” 

They explain that someone attacked them with pepper spray and that’s why they look like douchebags. 

Back at the motel, Sam further investigates the attack and the brothers surmise that they were attacked by venom.

At the local animal shelter, Brad gets a visit from Snake Man. Brad knows the guy and gets a $100 to let him walk into the kennel. The dude gathers ALL THE CATS and Brad wanders in to watch him EAT ONE. Yeah, we’re technically not on hate watch week anymore, BUT I STILL HATE THIS. 

Brad doesn’t last long. 

At the new crime scene, the brothers try to piece together the new information. Dean sees Colonel in a cage and ACCUSES HIM OF BEING A SUSPECT. GUH. Dean, just say you hate dogs and go home. Colonel doesn’t react to silver and Sam guesses they “can rule out killer.” Colonel starts barking. 

How would you like to come home with me and live in a nice big bunker and go for car rides all the time and eat liver sausages and help solve mysteries? 

Dean THE SMARTEST BEAN AROUND Winchester notices that Colonel is reacting to the local cop’s hat, so he tries it out. Bingo. Colonel was a witness to the crimes. 

Sam thinks there’s a way to communicate with the dog to find out what he’s seen. 

Kevin gets them a spell to talk with the dog. Dean agrees to drink the Mind Meld concoction because he doesn’t want Sam to take on more than healing from near death even if he doesn’t know if because he has an angel possessing him. Whew. 

The spell doesn’t seem to work (But it DID, so can I like get said spell? I’d really love to talk with my cat on the regular, lolz, I’m not crazy.) 

After eating lunch, Colonel sits up and asks for the channel to be changed. DUDE. It’s Foreigner. No one puts Foreigner in the corner. Dean’s on my side and has a nice argument with the dog while Sam watches confused. 

Dean gets to the point of the situation and asks about the cowboy hat. The killer wears a hat. WBK. As he throws away his food wrapping, Sam wants to know about the cats. Dean retrieves it like a good boy. (but seriously, German Shepherds ARE NOT RETRIEVERS. Good luck getting them to return anything!) 

Suddenly, there’s a noise outside and both Dean and Colonel head to the window to harass the mailman. Yep. 

Back at the motel, Sam tells Dean that side effects of mind melding with an animal can include developing animal urges. Suddenly I’m reminded of Dean’s fascination with the dog familiar from season eight and feel horribly uncomfortable. Dean angrily opens a chocolate bar, only for the dog to warn him off of it. No chocolate? This is an outrage!

Outside, a pigeon poops on Baby. “Hey, dick move, pigeon!” The bird returns anger with insult. “Screw you, asshat!” Apparently all animals have a universal language just sprinkled with insults! Dean shouts at the pigeon with all the subtlety of a very large human-shaped dog.

Sam manages to drag Dean into the car, but not before I make a diorama of this scene and place it on my Supernatural altar of Very Good Things. 

Dean and Sam argue over whether they should leave Colonel in the car. “You think we like that?” Dean asks, ROYALLY insulted. Hell, no. Colonel’s going in with them. In a moment where I curse my horrific prescience, Dean gives a lusty once-over to a nearby tied-up poodle. I…just…

Inside the shelter, Dean interrogates all the shelter animals. There’s only one dog who can give any good intel, and the dog only delivers in exchange for a belly rub. From Sam.

The dog gives them a tip: they’re looking for a cowboy hatted villain who works at a nearby restaurant. Dean lets all the animals free before they leave. “I didn’t peg you for a softy,” Colonel remarks. But WE all knew. Dean Bean <3

The Winchesters break into the restaurant that evening and discover a giant stash of prescription medications and…a cage of mice. The mice give Dean a tip: animal bits and pieces are stored neatly in the refrigerator. Sam finds a spell: with the right magic, ingesting a certain bit of animal helps the magician to temporarily gain that animal’s power. The guy’s mixing various animal parts to experiment on the effects and fun new powers he might develop. 

Dean and Sam encounter a chef and waiter preparing a private dinner (featuring shark fin) and shoo them out under the guise of health inspector. 

Chef Leo nibbled on a chameleon, which allows him to get the drop on Sam. 

He swipes at Sam’s throat. Gadreel flashes to life and heals Sam’s terrible throat slash. Leo witnesses this miraculous healing and decides that Sam’s the ultimate snak - I mean, meal. 

Leo sniffs out a dog, only to turn around and see…Dean. When the chef learns that Dog Dean and Angel Sam are brothers he is many levels of confused, but that doesn’t put him off his plans to chow down on Sam Fucking Winchester and his creamy angel filling. Dean, being a dog, immediately sniffs out some new information about Leo: he has cancer. Traditional treatments did nothing to help Leo, but his animal power worked. While his quest began sympathetically, murder is a side effect that Leo’s totally cool with as long as he can keep pushing the boundaries of man and beast. “Guess you eat enough predators, you start to become one.” 

The chef pulls out a wolf heart so he can tear Dean - a mere dog - into little kibble sized bits. Dean breaks free just in time and leads Leo on a merry chase outside. He looks oddly triumphant for being cornered by Leo in an alley, and whistles sharply. A pack of the stray dogs come running and tear Leo to bits. 

Dean races back to check on Sam and calls for Sam…or Zeke...to wake up. “Don’t make me lick your damn face,” he pleads dramatically. Sam snaps awake. Hooray! Happy ending!

We jump to the Colonel meeting the vegans from earlier. They wuv that cute widdle puppy wuppy! Dean regrets that they can’t take Colonel along with them but it’s no life for a dog! It’s vegan dog treats from here on out. 

The spell wears off just as Colonel tells Dean, “Dogs aren't really man's best friend. I know it sounds like a conspiracy theory, but the real reason we were put here was to…” He starts barking, and the spell’s done at last. I’m sure we’ll finally learn the truth about dogs in the final scene of season 15, right? RIGHT? 

At the car, Dean checks in with Sam. Sammy’s fine, but he’s a little weirded out by what Leo said about him - why did he want to know WHAT Sam was? Dean dissembles awkwardly and they take off for further adventures, played out to the credits by sad guilt violins.

These Quotes Have Fleas:

The slippery nipple shots at the Dolly Parton Dixie Stampede nearly killed the guy

Always knew I'd find the source of all evil at a vegan bakery

You know who wears sunglasses inside? Blind people. And douchebags

I need a Raquel Welch poster and a rock hammer

I’m getting extorted by a dog

Want to read more? Check out our Recap Archive! 

[whatawriterwields]

Fever

“She’s hot.” 

Crowley leaned against the doorframe. Aziraphale was crouched by a bed in the corner of the room, hand hovering over the forehead of a little girl; the girl had her blankets bunched in fists and flung over her head, and her eyes squeezed tightly shut. Crowley feigned distaste with all his might as he watched Aziraphale fret.

“What do you think?” he said, folding his arms. “Some bit of demonic nature acting up? If she’s about to spout hellfire, you might want to step away.”

Aziraphale missed the sarcasm in Crowley’s tone. “I don’t think it’s a demonic phenomenon.”

“What, think it’s angelic then?” Crowley watched Aziraphale gently pry the girl’s arms apart and stroke her sweaty hair back from her forehead. “Some sort of - of holy light she’s manifesting?”

“I rather think,” said Aziraphale, “she has the flu.”

Read on Ao3

This pronouncement took Crowley aback. Eden was an extraordinary child in many ways - half demon, half angel, something they were both pretty sure had never happened before - but in all the extraordinary things that had happened since she’d arrived on their door in that basket, there had been nothing so commonplace as a human sickness.

“Who’d have given her the flu?” Crowley said, as Aziraphale wrapped Eden’s blanket tighter around her. “We don’t carry germs, do we?”

“I’m sure I don’t,” said Aziraphale primly.

That got a laugh out of Crowley. Handling dusty hundred-year-old manuscripts all day, and the bastard had the nerve to imply Crowley was the dirty one. But he also drew away from the doorframe and closer. If it was really the flu, there was nothing to worry about.

“It’ll pass in a week,” he said. “That’s what happens with humans, isn’t it?”

“I suppose so.” Aziraphale bit his lip. “I hope so.” 

“Don’t go worrying about her now, angel.” Crowley looped his arm around Aziraphale’s waist, pulling him close, making him stop fretting over Eden for a moment. Aziraphale turned willingly to sink into his arms. Their foreheads leaned together for a moment, Crowley breathing in Aziraphale’s warm breath, before their lips met. 

“I do worry,” Aziraphale murmured. “You know, I’ve been responsible for every human being ever to walk the Earth, but it’s a bit different with her.”

“I wasn’t responsible for anyone until she came along,” Crowley laughed. Then he kissed Aziraphale’s cheek. “Except you.” 

_____

Aziraphale didn’t open the shop that day. He felt it was a somewhat momentous occasion, their daughter coming down with her first human ailment - though he didn’t necessarily require a momentous occasion to close his bookshop. He never had, but since Armageddon had failed to happen his time had been consumed by other things more than ever. Crowley moving in, and a hundred nights and mornings spent curled up next to him in bed; meals eaten out together as they scoured the city for fine dining; long walks in the park, warm evenings spent stargazing. And then, three years ago, the arrival of a baby at their door. Wrapped in a gold blanket and with a little note affixed to the handle, reading simply Good job stopping Armageddon. -G.

Somehow, they’d both had the feeling the baby hadn’t been sent by Gabriel. And when they’d discovered she was an angel-demon hybrid, well, there wasn’t a long list of suspects for who could create such a child. It had, however, taken a substantial period of time to cajole Crowley into admitting that, yes, in an idle moment, perhaps he’d sent his thoughts skyward and wished for a daughter.

Aziraphale put a pot of water on the stove for soup before starting to make tea. 

“Chicken noodle?” said Crowley idly, searching the pantry. 

“That does seem rather the thing.” Aziraphale winced as he heard her coughing from the bedroom. He could swear his hearing was better where Eden was concerned, though his angelic senses had always surpassed human ones. “I do hope she isn’t terribly cold.”

“Soup’ll warm her up.” Crowley passed Aziraphale a can. 

“Should we be giving her medicine?”

“Think it’s just rest she needs.”

Aziraphale’s hands moved distractedly around him. The water wasn’t hot enough yet, but he wanted to do something. “Maybe I should give her another blanket. We still have that golden one she was wrapped in when she came, and I think it had some angelic magic in it…”

Crowley regarded Aziraphale for a moment, seeming to be making a decision. Then he moved over toward the stove. “I’ll mind the soup. You go and fetch it.”

Aziraphale was grateful for something to do. He hurried out of the kitchen, making for the closet where the blanket had been stashed. Sure enough, when he pulled it out, it was still warm, still faintly glowing. Three years and the light within it hadn’t faded. Yes, Aziraphale knew of only one being with that kind of power. 

He bustled back into the bedroom. Eden had drawn her blanket tighter around her, but otherwise hadn’t moved. When Aziraphale approached, she started coughing again, and Aziraphale was careful as he wrapped the blanket gently around her. He ran a soft hand through her bright red curls. 

“Shh, darling,” he whispered. “You’re all right.”

Eden opened her eyes. They were bright blue, like his. It still made him smile every time he saw them. In six thousand years of being Heaven’s disappointment, he’d never imagined being so proud of seeing a child who looked like him. 

“Papa,” she said, her voice thin. 

“It’s me.”

“Where’s Daddy?” 

“He’s making you some soup. I just came to check on you, to see if you were warm enough.” Aziraphale kissed her on the forehead, one hand on her shoulder, and stilled as one arm came up to wrap around his. “I got out your old baby blanket for you.”

“Not a baby,” Eden said defiantly. She held his round hand with her smaller one. “I don’t need a baby blanket.”

Aziraphale smiled. “What would you like, then, to stay warm?”

Her other hand found his waistcoat, bunching the fabric into her fist to pull him closer. “I wanna cuddle.” 

Well. He was an angel of the Lord; who was he to refuse her? 

_____

Crowley brought up the soup when it was ready. He’d been prepared to find Aziraphale whirling around the room in a frenzy of nervous activity, changing the temperature, trying to keep her both warm and cool at once, possibly reading up on the history of influenza - dear Someone, he hoped Aziraphale wasn’t doing that - and doing his best to keep calm for Eden’s sake. What he saw instead made him have to pause in the doorway again, leaning against the frame.

Aziraphale was in the bed, with Eden snuggled up against his side. She’d curled around him so her head was resting on his belly. Her eyes were squeezed shut, but Crowley knew she wasn’t asleep. 

Aziraphale’s arm was draped loosely around her, and he was looking down at her with an expression that could have melted the heart of every demon in Hell.

“Soup’s on,” Crowley said weakly as he entered the room. “Hey, angel.”

Eden’s eyes opened. They lit up when she saw Crowley. “Daddy!”

“How’s my favorite little potted plant?” Crowley crossed the room in two strides and knelt next to her, holding up the steaming bowl of soup. “Ready to be watered?” 

“I’m not a plant!” Eden protested, but she was smiling, her cheeks gaining color as she giggled. “I don’t need to be watered!”

“Oh, you’re a stubborn plant. You know what I do to my stubborn plants?” Crowley poked Eden gently in the belly as she continued to giggle. “You want me to stick you down the garbage disposal?”

“You won’t!” 

“You don’t know what I’m capable of. I’m a big, nasty demon.” Crowley bared his teeth and showed off his yellow eyes. 

He’d only known two people, in his entire life, to not recoil at the sight of his eyes; the first had been Aziraphale, of course, who’d encouraged him to remove his sunglasses behind closed doors, who’d told him over and over again as they lay together late at night that all of him was beautiful. The second, whose eyes were normal and sea-blue like her angel father’s, was Eden. Eden loved the sight of Crowley and always had. Even with Aziraphale in his life, Crowley didn’t think he’d ever get used to that. 

“Dear, don’t get her excited,” Aziraphale said with a disapproving frown. “She needs rest.”

“Papa’s no fun,” Crowley confided to Eden as he fed her a spoonful of soup. “How’s it taste, potted plant?” 

“Good.” Eden shifted her position, nuzzling further against Aziraphale. “Papa, move over. I wanna cuddle Daddy too.”

Crowley swallowed, hard, in a half-successful attempt to mask the swell of emotions in his chest at the words. Aziraphale’s eyes twinkled as he shifted over, pulling Eden over next to him to give Crowley room to clamber in beside them. Crowley managed to keep the bowl of soup from spilling as Aziraphale drew the blanket over all three of them, keeping Eden’s golden blanket wrapped around her.

“Now you’re going to be warm for sure,” Crowley told her, settling the soup onto his lap. “Open up.”

Eden took another bite of soup and then snaked her arms around Crowley’s waist. Crowley had even greater difficulty quelling his desire to cry this time around. It wasn’t fair for her to be so adorable. It had to be some kind of crime. She was part-demon, after all - but that thought didn’t go far. Half of her was Aziraphale. There was no way she could be anything other than perfect. 

“Budge up,” Crowley managed. “You can’t eat your soup like that.” 

When he looked up, he noticed Aziraphale was looking at him. And - oh, this family was heaven-bent on killing him today - that look of infinite fondness, which had nearly cracked his heart open viewed from the doorway, was now directed entirely at him.

“You must know,” said Aziraphale softly, “that I’m not going to let you get away with being kind to me.”

Crowley went red and looked away. “Don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“You were watching me panic in the kitchen, and you told me to go and get the blanket while you watched the soup.” Aziraphale’s hand came to rest on Crowley’s arm. “You must have expected I’d pay you back for that.”

Crowley shut his eyes and growled. He knew what was coming. He knew he couldn’t object, because, bless it all, it had been years since the failed Armageddon and Aziraphale knew perfectly well that he liked it. 

“You’re such a kind person, Crowley.”

He groaned. “Yes. Great. Rub it in.”

“I certainly shall.” Aziraphale sounded smug.

“Bastard.”

“Crowley! Not in front of Eden.”

“Bastard,” said Eden proudly, and that was what did Crowley in. He shoved the soup into Aziraphale’s hands and wrapped his arms tight around Eden, cradling her close as she started up her giggling again.

“You’re my favorite daughter in the whole world,” he whispered.

“Am I your favorite plant?”

“The rest can’t compare.” 

It had taken a long time for Aziraphale to make him admit he’d wished for a child. But the very first night Eden had arrived - after the initial shock and confusion and unpleasant memories associated with finding a baby in a basket at his door - when Aziraphale had been away in another room and Crowley had found himself holding her, he’d whispered the truth into her ear. He hadn’t wanted a single day to go by in which she didn’t know it. And the baby Eden had smiled up at him, as if she understood him already. 

_____

Music was playing from some undefined location when Eden finished her soup. It was one of the songs Daddy loved, from the singer he called Freddie. Eden couldn’t hear the words, though, over the slow, deep sound of Papa’s voice reading. 

Daddy had fallen asleep, one arm still around her, sunglasses still on, but askew on his face. Eden nestled further into his side. Papa was close by on her other side, one large, warm hand on her hair. With her fathers around her she didn’t feel cold.

Eden didn’t know that she was half-angel half-demon. She didn’t know the secret of her creation, nor that she’d been a token of celebration for a world that had very nearly ended. She knew only in a vague way that Papa was an angel, and in a much vaguer way than that that Daddy was a creature of the bottomless Pit. These were things she’d need to be much older to truly comprehend.

What she knew, as she felt herself drift off to sleep, as she heard Papa stop his reading and lean his head against Daddy’s shoulder, was that she had the best family in the world. That was something it wasn’t hard to put together.

[chemicalmagecraft]

I Would Totally Kick Jiraiya’s Butt Chapter 16

A/N: Kind of a timeskippy chapter because there's like a year gap between important events. And I also ended up having a lot of fun with the secret base.

kukukuku~

"So," I said, sitting atop a sealed stone arch, "how does it look?" I took a bite from my chocolate bar.

"It looks really complicated," Naruto said, squinting. I smiled, though. It looked like he was at least following it somewhat, which was good.

"You really fucking want a space-time ninjutsu, don't you?" Kurama noted.

I huffed. "Excuse you. I'm sitting on a space-time ninjutsu. I want to know if it's a functional space-time ninjutsu." I looked at Ai and Tenten expectantly. "Well?"

Ai shrugged. "As far as I can tell, it'll work. You might want to check with your eyes first, though."

I nodded and pulled down my sunglasses. I saw only a few seconds into the future, so the drain was relatively minor; I lost maybe thirty minutes off my day at most. "Right, looks good. Wanna see it?"

"Don't you need to make a second one first?" Tenten asked me.

I grinned lightly. "Well of course I made another one already. I'm like a celebrity chef that way. Keep your arms and legs away from the portal until it's fully formed, unless you want to lose them." I took another bite from my chocolate and swung my legs up away from the portal and sent a command to the two demon sage cores embedded in each arch. I didn't see the safety illusion or portal form from my vantage point, but I did notice the shadow fall over Ai, Tenten, Naruto, and Kurama from how the sunlight was now somewhere miles away. I swung my legs back down once it was safe, using the momentum to swing myself through the portal and, with an application of chakra threads, onto the wall that was where I was sitting on the other side. It was pretty surreal, to be honest. Cool, though.

"Come on in, the water's fine!" I shouted from literal miles away. Or I guess I should maybe use kilometers...

"Why is it so dark?" Tenten asked.

I dropped to the ground. "It's a me-made cave. Wanna see?" I snapped my fingers and activated the light seal I'd placed above the arch.

"It's pretty empty," Naruto muttered. There was in fact literally nothing in the cave, except for a few strategically-placed holes for better air flow and pillars that hopefully would prevent cave-ins.

I shrugged and made a sort of picture frame with my hands, looking at the cave. "You try remotely making an artificial cave in a mountain several kilometers away. Now that I can physically go here I'll hopefully be able to refurbish this place better. Just gotta find a good place to put the gateway arch."

"How did you even find this place?" Ai asked.

"Remote-controlled body killed some bandits. Well, not remote-controlled but certainly not physically me. On the other side of the portal is an abandoned mine they were using as a hideout. It's secluded enough that nobody's gonna find it, hopefully. And once my base is more set up I'll just hide the front entrance." I walked back through the portal, then closed it behind me. I lifted my palm, and the core I was using in the keystone of the arch flew into it. The arch collapsed back into the earth. "I think maybe I'll use my closet for the gate, actually."

kukukuku~

Despite the absolute hell of boredom school was, the next few months passed by surprisingly fast. And even school wasn't really all that bad because I could telepathically communicate with Neji, Tenten, Kurama, Hinata through Kurama, Usagi, Gaara, and Karura. And even if they were all somehow busy, I could split myself without actually manifesting physically as Chikage and talk to myself without being crazy! Well, crazier...

Speaking of Chikage, we unfortunately couldn't figure out a way for her to physically take objects. There were a few ideas that almost came close, namely inscribing seals on her body to allow her to summon a sack or just seal stuff away in her, and then the simple idea of grabbing something from the shadows and trying to move it around, but unfortunately didn't cut it. The sack theoretically worked fine, but as it turns out, summoning makes a lot of chakra "noise" that a well-trained sensor can easily detect, and Danzō took full advantage of that fact. Storage was fine on the detection front, but Chikage had trouble melting into shadows with a physical object stored in her. She could still do it, but the part of her that had the object in it was always completely black and went either very slow outside of a shadow or kinda slow inside a shadow, especially compared to her usual near-light speed. Because we'd only have one shot, we were holding off on using it... And just grabbing stuff from the shadows was even worse, because it was exactly like sealing in terms of results except the object was outside of the shadow.

Moving on to brighter news, I used building the base to train my power. I wasn't two-tailed yet, but I was approaching Shukaku in terms of red chakra already. I also trained up my control of all the elements I had some kind of affinity for, letting me use more and even use two at a time. And yes, I remembered to practice taijutsu this time, meaning I could kick people kinda well. Even more fun, though, is the fact that I inspired other people to do some training. Namely, my friends. Except Kurama who, as he was locked in a small child, was naturally excused. Ino, Shikamaru, and Tenten joined the ranks of budding sagehood. Neji could manage a weak sage mode after a minute or so, and he managed to build up to first tail cloak without getting too bad of a fever. Naruto actually knew jutsu now. At least one of each type! With how I was giving Kurama back his yin chakra, Naruta was unknowingly getting better at using genjutsu, at least a bit. Hinata had gained some confidence and could control an entire one person's body and chakra, going so far as to somehow being able to make people use the jutsu that they knew, despite not knowing them herself. I guess there's some kind of chakra memory? That's probably what Sasori used with his puppets, actually. And Sakura... well technically she didn't do to much training, but she was super strong and I helped her learn how to not break things? I guess that counts as training...

Next topic, the secret base was awesome! It took me months to actually dig out all the rooms and stuff, then another month or so to find or make all the furniture and decorate it, but secret base! I also took to trying to do engineering after finding some broken up electronics. I probably wasn't the best at it, but with magnet release and Chikage's ability to possess objects essentially letting me scan things, I could do all kinds of cheating. So yeah, I modded a generator to be able to power it solely with magnet release, which was pretty simple, actually. Then, when I was finally able to fix up the minifridge I'd found, I got some snacks in my base. Well, I already had a pantry but I was able to have more stuff. I was hoping to actually make original stuff, though. Like maybe a magnet release-powered railgun. That would be fun. Or actually, if I could somehow make myself a 3-D printer or something like that knowing generally how that stuff works, that would also be useful. I didn't know what to do about plastic, but I at least knew how those things that you use to sand down stuff like metal or wood into particular shapes worked. Long-term goal, though...

In addition to the portal room, my base had some neat features. There was a sort of living room, which was where I put the snacks and some books. I was also trying to figure out how to hook up a TV in there, but that was probably a losing battle... There was also a theater that I was hoping I'd be able to use at some point, though I had yet to find any projector, much less one that was either usable or easy for me to repair. I mean I guess I could just genjutsu up visuals, but where's the fun in that? Okay nevermind that actually sounds really fun. I had my scrying room, which was just a fancy room I'd made with a really big crystal ball and some other stuff I could use for scrying. I made sure that that room in particular was visually impressive.

For the actually practical stuff, I had a mechanical workshop for mechanical projects, a fuinjutsu workshop near it for fuinjutsu projects, a poison/medical room for take a wild guess, and a gigantic storage room for materials. The mechanical workshop was really only just a table with scrap metal and reference books on it so far, but I was hopeful! The fuinjutsu room looked a little more impressive. It had shelves of scrolls on the walls, and a desk with a buttload of ink bottles on it. I ended up doing a lot of work there, because it turned out I could sell a bunch of basic paper bombs for a lot of money through my dad. Don't you just love it when your dad helps you sell a whole demolition team's worth of real-ass bombs? And then the storage room was just for storing the rest of the junk I had, plus the ores and stuff I managed to find and promised myself to mess around with someday.

The poison/medical room... was a work in progress. I mean, I kinda had some of the poison stuff going. The half of the room I had for poison was well-ventilated and separated from the other half with a glass barrier. Turns out Chikage just... had sand powers because I ate enough Shukaku. I knew I had magnet release, but I didn't actually expect that I'd have been able to generate pure silica sand. Seriously, how does earth jutsu work? And my scrying room was useful for figuring out exactly what to do with that to make nice, clear glass from that. Turns out you have to get sand surprisingly hot to make glass, but I made do by using a demon sage core for some extra chakra. I also used my glass magic to make all that mad sciencey glass paraphernalia you always see in mad science labs, using an Orochimaru base I could scry for reference.

Side note: I also ended up selling glass figurines and stuff because wouldn't you know it, the ability to make high-quality glass through supernatural powers makes for really pricey glass stuff, especially after I figured out how to alter the sand slightly to make colored glass. Seriously, that dragon was just... I was almost tempted to keep it because it was so beautiful, but I made so much from it. And then I realized I could make more. My base became so awesome a week or so of no sleep after that. I also jammed a bunch of glass in a scroll, because first off having a scroll that launches shards of glass at whoever you point it at like a literal glass cannon is a pretty good weapon and second off having shards of glass you can control with your mind with you at all times is a pretty good weapon.

Where was I? Oh, right. Deadly poison. I managed to work out a recipe for a decently good and fast-acting death poison with some help from Anko using the flora of the mountain range. It was a strangely convenient mountain range for poisoning. What a coincidence. I also made a bit of a garden for the ingredients that I could take from so I didn't have to go searching for more ingredients. I put that stuff in some Skyrim-looking potion bottles (made from glass, of course) so that I could just take a few of with me. I was hoping to use those with senbon for some sneaky kills. I also ingested tiiiiiiiiny amounts of the stuff (At large enough gaps, of course. I'm a mad scientist in training, not an idiot.) to try and build up my poison resistance, at least to my own stock. As for the medical side, well... I had a first aid kit and a few cruddy stone beds with stabilizing seals and chakra reservoirs attached to demon sage cores that would hopefully do more good than harm to anyone placed on the beds. I'm not Tsunade, that's good enough for me. The scalpels I put in there were really more for show and using my ferrokinetic powers on in the case of a home intruder. Seriously, why is Shukaku actually the most overpowered bijū aside from the Jūbi? Not that I'm complaining, of course.

I also had a bit of an exercise room made. Really, it was mostly just a track for jogging, a bunch of rocks with various weights to pick up and throw around, and a rock wall. And I found a secluded forest clearing far enough away from my base that I could hopefully use it to test bombs without worrying about the shockwaves damaging my base, at least if I kept them small enough. And it looked like it would be a pretty good training ground. I mean, I had another idea for the bomb range and training ground, but that'd do for now. I didn't exactly have enough demon sage cores to float a giant platform yet...

And of course, I wasn't the only one there. I mean, technically I was, but turns out Usagi can split themselves pretty much infinitely, so long as there are enough demon sage cores. I mean, there was still an "original" Usagi that was still carrying out their original mission and was more intelligent than the copies, but Usagi's intelligence had ended up filling all the demon sage cores that I wasn't directly using, making a bunch of hive-minded servants made of rock for me that populated my base. We were originally almost the same personality-wise, but it seemed like Usagi grew slightly... off from me. For one, the politeness wasn't an act anymore. To be honest, that was kind of disturbing, especially coupled with how I was ordering around these versions of me who were disturbingly polite. Still, they were useful because, as I said, a bunch of hive-minded servants. They fetched stuff for me.

kukukuku~

I admired a glass "gem" Chikage had just made. "Do we even need a 3-D printer?" I asked, tossing it up lightly. "This is some dang good glass, not to mention the fact that we can control it. Sure, we may want to also work on metal, but that shouldn't be too much of a step up from metal when we get more power, though we probably can't just conjure up more iron."

She stopped fiddling with the guitar she'd made from her chakra body. "Sounds legit," she agreed, then started making sounds like a cat coughing up a hairball. Her throat glowed and she spat up a ball of molten glass. "I am the 3-D printer." I still had no idea how magnet release could be used to control molten glass, but to be fair it could be used on regular sand, which isn't magnetic in the slightest.

"Hey, I have an idea," I said as I watched her mold the glass into the rough shape of a kunai, then let it start cooling so we could clean it up later. Glass blades, though a little fragile, are super sharp if you do 'em right. "You up for another blade?"

"Hit me with it." I sent my idea to her telepathically. What, you thought I was just going to tell you? She grinned and spat out another glob. I thought for a moment about how spitting molten glass would probably be a pretty good ninjutsu by itself, though that was a thought for later. Chikage waved her hands over the glob of molten glass, elongating it. The blade was longer than a kunai, but much thinner. It was intentionally weak, though not enough to fail to stab through someone. The blade didn't have a handle yet, that'd come later... "Let's hope this idea actually works, 'cause we're basically grasping at straws here."

kukukuku~

Chikage

Uchiha Shisui paused on his walk home. He surveyed the dark street and placed a hand on his blade. Something was following him. He noticed something in the shadows, and activated his Sharingan. "Who's there?" he asked. He saw an outline in the shadows.

"Uchiha Shisui," the shadow said. I bet you can tell by now just who that shadow is. "Your life is in danger."

He raised an eyebrow. "And I'm supposed to trust the shadow demon that's stalking me?"

I pushed a dagger out of my shadow, hilt first. "This is for you." I slowly moved toward him until he cautiously grabbed it.

"The blade is made of glass. What use is a glass dagger?"

"The Thorn of Spite. It was made to kill one man who is better off dead, and is sufficient for that purpose." The first of the enchantments I'd sealed onto the dagger activated, transcribing a storage seal onto his skin. The dagger automatically entered, and the seal hid itself. "It will show itself in the event your eyes fail you. You will know who you must kill then." Unencumbered of the dagger, I was able to move far away in an instant.

And then I came back. "Just to be clear, the dagger isn't for suicide."

He snorted. "Yeah, I figured." I disappeared again. He stared at his palm. "The hell was that?"

[ty-talks-comics]

Best of Marvel: Week of July 10th, 2019

Best of this Week: Wolverine Vs. Blade - Marc Guggenheim, Dave Wilkins and Travis Lanham

It is quite possible to just have TOO MUCH AWESOME in one book.

Wolverine Vs. Blade had been advertised for a while, but that didn’t stop it from hitting me like a train from out of nowhere. Hile the story is very one note, it still fits both of these characters and the art elevates it to a level that I haven’t been excited about from Marvel since Clayton Crain was doing Carnage USA and X-Force. It blended the line between almost 3D and photorealistic and the writing turned this into an awesome buddy-hero story with hilarity and badass banter.

Taking place in Wolverine’s X-Force days, prior to Avengers vs. X-Men and before Blade became a full time member of the Avengers, we open to Blade and Wolverine in the middle of taking down a Cult of vampires known as “The Creed.” The book wastes no time on the banter or the action as Wolverine makes a nod to one of their previous interactions where blade stuck him full of Vampire blood while slicing a vampire head into pieces. 

Wolverine shines in these opening pages in the always badass black and grey. His face is alive with burning vampire hating rage, showcasing his sharp canines and HEAVILY muscled body as he slashes and slices through vampires with the reckless abandon that he’s known for. The vampire LOOK scary, but Wolverine IS SCARY, especially covered in their blood and surrounded by the still burning remains of their bodies.

After thinking they’ve completely torn through the cult, Blade offers Wolverine a marshmallow from the fire that he’s about to set. Wolverine thinks he’s joking, but then, in a moment that I regret laughing heartily at, Blade shows off a single white marshmallow and gives us ONE of the best shit eating grin in this entire book.

Cutting to six months later, Wolverine is being attacked by very minor villain, Dragoness, who has been turned into a vampire. For no other reason, I think, than to flex his art skills and give me something to fawn over, Wilkins draws Wolverine standing with his back to a window and arms flexed so hard that I almost thought his veins were going to EXPLODE. He was Huge Jackedman levels of vascular and needed to rehydrate like hell, but I couldn’t look away from how ridiculous and magnificent he looked. However, he cuts through one of Dragoness’ wings and sends her spiraling into a conveniently placed piece of sharpened wood. Soon after, he finds the item that she was fighting him for; a mysterious box radiating with magic.

Elsewhere in Germany, Blade is taking down a Vampire Count who fires at him with eye beams that curiously look like Cyclops’. Blade allows the vampire to think he has him on the ropes before setting off explosive charges that trap the vampire under rubble. Blade is the undisputed king of banter in this issue as he offers to pick up a rock or two before the sun rises and kills the vampire for a little bit of information. When the vampire says he’d rather die, Blade gives another grin as the sun rises and burns the vamp to ash.

Both men are given information from their sources, Wolverine in Doctor Strange and Blade in some fellow he dangles off the side of a building. They learn about the prophecy of a Vampire Messiah named Varkis. Logan sees a pictogram that looks like him fighting Blade and Blade learns that Varkis may be a mutant. Armed with their information, the two make their ways separately to South America for a final confrontation. 

The fight is epic.

Both men ripple with brutal and blood energy and their musculature is a sight to behold. Blade impales Wolverine with his sword, but Wolverine, being the badass that he is, rips it out and slashes blade across the face, destroying his glasses. Wolverine pounces at him again, but Blade hits him with an anti-vampire glave and Wolverine stands confused. The two work out their equal confusion until Varkis appears, looking like Wolverine, but still with bone claws.

He tells the pair that he was created from a portion of Wolverine that was sliced off and grown using magic as Wolverine has left many parts all over the world, but none have spawned a whole person. Wolverine tries to take on Varkis while Blade cuts through more lesser vampires until Wolverine remembers the picture and suggests he and blade recreate the battle ON VARKIS. Wolvie aims low while Blade aims high and Varkis is thoroughly killed.

Blade gives his last shit eating grin as he says he forgot the marshmallows this time after they blow up another temple. It's a nice call back to earlier and the perfect cherry to top this wonderful book.

This book was a treasure. Wilkins art was amazingly dynamic, making every fight scene feel like it was brutal, bloody and horrifically violent. His colors straddle the line between very dark and amazingly bright when they need to be. The red from Wolverine’s eyes in the X-Force costume stand out alongside the red of Blade’s sunglasses as they glean with their movements and create little motion lines as they go. Most of the book takes place during the night and Wilkins makes great use of lighting to set the mood, giving a real goth or Castlevania-esque feel to things. 

Guggenheim is in top form for the characterization of Blade of Wolverine. Logan is no-nonsense and violent to a terrifying degree as he always should be. Blade is snarky and effortlessly cool like Wesley Snipes before him. If there were to be a mini-series between these two, I would love it if this team came together again, but for a One-Shot, this was absolutely fantastic.

If you want to see amazing art and basic story that still is a riot to enjoy, this book is definitely made for you. Dave Wilkins wows on every page and Guggenheim brings his skills back to the best of the mid-2000s Marvel style. If it did have any pitfalls, it would have to be that it should have been even longer. High recommend!

---------------------------------------------------

Something about black people and being experimented on makes me uncomfortable.

Runner Up: Miles Morales: Spider-Man #8 (Legacy #248) - Saladin Ahmed, Javier Garrón, David Curiel and Travis Lanham

In the last issue, Miles was captured by some sort of weird teleporting being after helping Bombshell fight off some ridiculously strong robots. This issue begins with him in some dark room, strapped to some kind of operating table with a heart beat monitor and only a creepy robot-thing to keep him company.

Miles looks absolutely terrified. Not only because he doesn't know where he is or who captured him, but the robot interacting with him says that its boss, The Assessor, will target Miles' family and friends if he doesn't comply. Miles agrees to the experiments and tests if only just to keep them safe.

The Assessor tests his combat, speed and climbing abilities and pushes Miles to his absolute llimits. He's run ragged in a way that is seldom seen except in cases where the threat is life or death. It goes on and on for an undetermined amount of time until Miles wakes up in an operating room where doctors discuss his DNA and maybe kidnapping his family for more subjects.

This angers and scares Miles into breaking free, beating up the doctors and defeating the teleporting enemy from before to make his grand escape.

Only… it turns out to be another test.

Saladin Ahmed absolutely nailed this issue with his focus on the bleakness and fear in Miles and the situation he's in. He made me genuinely terrified to turn the pages and see the next torture Miles would have to go through. Ahmed writes Miles like the scared teenage superhero that he is, he's hopeful, but frantic in the face of an enemy that knows who he is and how to hurt him.

Javier Garrón and David Curiel do their best to nail the unsettling feeling of the sanitized experimental environment that Miles finds himself in and utilize panel layouts to make the book even more terrifying. 

Every blank space around each panel is black compared to the normal white. Every panel is also small and feels claustrophobic, leaning heavily into the nature of the facility Miles finds himself in. In it's own way, it's clean and very structured to the point where it feels like you could be trapped reading the book.

I also feel like there's something here in the fact that it's the black Spider-Man being experimented on. Of course Pete has been poked and prodded every which way for years, but the way that the doctors and the robot were talking about Miles, made him seem less than human. He was never called a kid, just "the Subject."

Truly there are three absolutely horrifying pages in this issue. The first is where Miles has been ordered to sleep and he's shrouded in darkness aside from his face and the heartbeat monitor. The other is the double page spread of about 18 - 26 panels of Miles running, fighting, being scared, bleeding and all of the tortures he's put through while captured.

This issue is a high recommend because it's a well written and fantastically drawn chapter in this Miles Morales run. Saladin Ahmed draws heavily from his Black Bolt series in terms of storytelling and Garrón makes it all so real and visceral. As far as this run goes, this issue and the one prior are pretty good starting points if you've missed the rest!

[tiredlonelyghost]

I decided to do a timeline for the erasermic ship! Basically my headcannons on these guys lovely love life so if you wanna read it read below! for i have also included my crappy art c:

Friendship: so pretty much these guys were friends at UA I mean its cannon ffs. though I’d like to think they had a bumpy start because you know, angst and teenage emotions are always fun to think about! 

Shouta’s and Hizashi’s personalities couldn’t be anymore different, so when they first officially met  Shouta wanted nothing more than for this weird cockatoo looking person to somehow vanish or be expelled. He was loud, annoying, and for some reason he laughed at his own jokes more then what was necessary. Walking into class was pure hell for Shouta for this kid also thought it was mandatory to greet each person who walked in like a bird as well, teachers, students, a odd pet principal, anything. If anything could be worse Hizashi then made it his personal goal at some point during the school year to befriend Shouta; Needless to say, Shouta wasn’t having any of it. Their interactions mainly consisted of Hizashi trying to form anything conversation with our eraser hero in training and failing as Shouta would just sit there and never say a word to the other boy.

 All Hizashi wanted was to get to know Shouta better, the dude is really cool! Unlike Shouta, Hizashi had a weird obsession with him from the beginning. You could basically say he was the first ever eraserhead fanboy ( Eraserhead trash #1) and he would stop at nothing to be this dude’s friend. All the other students were confused at Hizashi’s interest in Shouta, to them he was just another loner who never talked and sat in the back of the class by themselves; but Hizashi saw more then that. He saw skill, determination, discipline, and one cool ass quirk yo! He tried his best to get a word or a reaction out of the other boy but his efforts never got him what he wanted, and it was really affecting our poor cockatoo. He couldn’t understand what he was doing wrong, he tried talking but he never got a response, he tried being nice sharing notes and even buying a random snack or two for the other boy but still nothing; you would think he would’ve gave up, but a yamada never gives up, he would keep trying even if it never got him no where. 

 One day though, he finally got a response; just not the one he wanted. Hizashi walking into the school’s entrance one day saw Shouta in front of him, and just like always he walked up behind him gave him a charming Hizashi greeting and began talking. Before walking into the school itself though Shouta stopped in his tracks, turned around, looked at Hizashi in the eyes (sunglasses) and said the three magic words 

“Please, fuck off.” 

Hizashi actually doesn’t remember clearly what happened after that. He did however, remember crying the entire day. He doesn’t even know why he had cried so much over a simple rejection but it had stung him so much, all he wanted was to be this dudes friend, why did he hate him so much? Hizashi is pretty much a zombie the entire week after that, no one but the students that had witnessed what had happened knew what was wrong with him. The classrooms atmosphere dropped with Hizashi’s mood, the room was to quiet and the tension in the air was almost unbearable and nothing made it better no matter what anyone tried. Until one day Hizashi was sitting at his desk looking down at his hands when he heard someone walk up and drop a snack on his desk. Confused, Hizashi looked up and saw Shouta standing there in front of him. His jaw tensed up as he braced himself for whatever the other teen was about to say. 

“I’m sorry, Yamada.” 

For once in his life Yamada Hizashi was speechless, another three magic words and it seemed that this depressive cursed that was laid upon him vanished. He smiled, rubbed the back of his head and accepted the apology. Shouta began to response to him after that, he didn’t talked a lot but just enough to keep Hizashi happy and smiling. They’re inseparable after that.

Confession: 

Throughout high school after befriending each other they’re best friends. They depend on each other for almost everything and Shouta honestly doesn’t know when he became so emotionally invested Hizashi. Though making him cry that day did seem to make something in him “snap” it was like he could feel any emotion the other boy was feeling at all times, and he didn’t like it at all. He could feel Hizashi’s happiness, his sadness (and among other things but lets blame that on hormones) after awhile of experiencing this though he began to get used to it. 

 They finally entered college and became roommates ( oh boy oh boy I wonder how that happened) while Shouta saw this as being one step closer to being a pro hero, Hizashi completely saw something else. 

PARTYING! DATING! SEX(ing?)! 

 Shouta really couldn’t stand it. Everyday Hizashi was begging him to go to some party with him, meet some people, be social. Shouta didn’t want any of it though, he didn’t need to party, he didn’t need to be social. If anything, all he needed was Hizashi by his side and he could get through anything, and it’s when he hit this realization shit went down hill. He soon realized that him feeling Hizashis “emotions” wasn’t really that at all. He was happy when Hizashi was happy, he was sad when Hizashi was sad,(and among other things, those damn hormones amirite?) that was all on his own and he hated it, because that meant he was in love with his best friend. 

 After he realized this, jealousy hit him like a rock. Hizashi was always bringing some date back to their room, or talking to Shouta about this chick or that dude. This caused things to go a little sour, Shouta began to distance himself from Hizashi. He couldn’t deal with the complicated feelings of a one sided love, he wouldn’t be able to get his studies done if all he was thinking about was how Hizashi was probably out doing god knows what with someone else right now. He drowned himself into his work, blocking out anything or anyone that tried to reach him. Blocking out Hizashi. 

 It obviously doesn’t take Hizashi to long to notice that Shouta is straight up ignoring him. He pulled this shit in high school before they were friends and hes pulling it again now. Like before Hizashi doesn’t know what he did wrong and it drives him crazy. He tries to chalk it up to Shouta just being really serious with his studies, which isn’t that far from the truth; but theres a difference to being busy and straight up ignoring someone. He doesn’t know if he should press Shouta about why he’s doing this, or just leave it be and hope for the best. He chooses the latter, It’s lonely and honestly kinda painful but he knows when Shouta is ready he’ll talk about why he’s doing what he’s doing. 

 One day though, Hizashi just has to talk to Shouta about something, a band that Hizashi is obsessed with is coming to the city they’re in and Hizashi is ecstatic. He had it all planned out, He’ll come back to the room tell Shouta about the concert, Shouta will be hella pumped and they’ll go together, and everything will be okay. Except that isn’t at all what ended up happening. 

 Hizashi does go back to the room and tells Shouta about the concert, but Shouta ignores him. Not a word out of him. So Hizashi repeats himself but louder this time, same response. He began to think, if this isn’t getting Shouta’s attention maybe something else will, so he does what he does best, be annoying as hell to Shouta. It isn’t till Hizashi is basically screaming the lyrics to Hit Me Baby by Brittney Spears Shouta finally looks at him. Their eyes lock and the room falls silent as Hizashi is muted by Shouta’s intense gaze. Shouta opens his mouth, and says three. magic. words.

“Please, fuck off.” 

Hizashi doesn’t know what happens again. All he knows is that he’s bawling his eyes out and had Shouta pinned underneath him. He finally catches his breath, and began to shout at Shouta. Screaming at him asking why, why was he acting like this, why did he hate him? Did he do something wrong? Is there something he can do to stop this behavior? The list goes on. Shouta is under him wide eyed and shocked. He didn’t realize that saying that would cause such a reaction from the other, he was uncomfortable. With the weight Hizashi was pressing down on him and the headache he was beginning to developed due to his screeching, Shouta began to feel extremely overwhelmed. The screeching came to a sudden halt though, and Shouta took this chance to try to sit back up. Hizashi stopped him with a hand on his shoulder, he used his other wipe to wipe away the tears that had started to dry on his face and took a deep breath. 

“Shouta, I’m so sorry for shouting. I just, I can’t stand it when you do that. You mean so much to me and I’m so scared something is going to take you away from me, that’s why when you do this I just feel so hopeless. I don’t ever want to lose you, if I ever did I don’t know what I’d do.” 

Hizashi reached for Shouta’s hand, Shouta’s breath stilling as his fingers wrapped around his own. He looks at their conjoint hands, and then back at Hizashi. His eyes are red and puffy from crying so hard, he looks tired, drained. Guilt washes over Shouta like the ocean over the shore. He has to say something to make Hizashi feel better, he can’t let him stay like this.

“Hizashi, I-”

His sentence was cut off as Hizashi moved the hand on his shoulder to cup his jaw, forcing his head up, and leaning in to kiss him lightly on the lips. It hadn’t lasted long at all, but for Shouta it felt like the entire world paused, only to be resumed when his friend pulled back and looked him in the eyes.

 “Shouta, you mean so much to me.” 

Marriage: 

If you’re thinking Hizashi is the one that proposed HA HA HA BITCH YOU’D BE WRONG

after that incident in college, our boys finally started dating, after graduating college and becoming our beloved heros Present Mic and Eraser Head. They  finally got settled down and moved into some semi-decent apartment. Their lives are hella busy, with Eraser being a pro hero and a teacher from Present Mic being  pro hero, a teacher, AND A FUCKING RADIO SHOW HOST, things can get kinda hectic needless to say. Though at the end of the day ( or like week) both of them are just happy to finally spend alone time together in the comfort of their apartment, watching crappy movies and eating food that will probably give them stomach cancer in the next 20 years. 

 One of these days though Hizashi can see that Shouta is anxious, yet he doesn’t know why. They had be cuddling on the couch watching some cheesy romance movie, Shouta tensing up every now and then. It got really bad though when a proposal scene came up, Hizashi had to pause the movie and ask Shouta if he was alright. 

He was quiet, looking anywhere but at Hizashi. Then suddenly he sighed, and nodded.

“It’s just that lately, I’ve been thinking about something a lot.” 

Hizashi raised a eyebrow up at him and Shouta sighed again. He suddenly shot up and walked into their bedroom. Hizashi extremely confused at this point, didn’t know if he should follow him or stay where he was. That didn’t matter though as Shouta came back into their living room, standing in front of their couch and hiding something behind his back. 

“When we first met, I honestly would’ve never thought that you would’ve had this much of a impact on my life, I was just some weird quiet kid trying to get through his school years and you were this loud, annoying, popular guy who wouldn’t leave me alone. At first I couldn’t stand you, but as we got closer I’ve found that I actually couldn’t stand being WITHOUT you. life is to quiet when you’re not around, it lacks warmth, security, and color. You make everything seem so bright and cartoon like it actually makes me wonder if your quirk is actually being a fucking cartoon or anime character. There’s been times where I’ve pushed you away and almost lost you, times where I would hide how I feel around you, but no more of that. Hizashi I’ve been thinking about this for awhile, And if you’ll have me.”

Shouta got on one knee, and pulled out a tiny box out from behind his back, opening it and revealing a ring.

“I’d like it if you would be my husband. Hizashi, will you marry me?”

Hizashi then almost deafens the entire city from screaming yes.

Family:

a couple years after getting married our boys finally adopt our lovely Hitoshi and then eventually Eri. Their life isn’t perfect, but they wouldn’t have it any other way. 

(theres more to say but I’ve been working on this non-stop for 8 hours now and i need to crash before I actually black out and die or something) 

[randomwordsandstormydays]

The One Where Livy Joins The Railroad

Welcome to another installment of the ‘Chronicals of Livy Larsen’. Enjoy.

The donut shop looks unsuspecting enough that Livy doubts the validity of the information she was given. Is it really possible that the Railroad is hidden inside such a small building, with little to no protection and a crumbling roof? The holotape that was left in her kitchen two weeks ago seems to imply just that.

After her father was recalled and she was beat all to hell by his captor, she spent the next few days mending her injuries and licking her wounds. It wasn’t just the snapped ribs and shattered nose, her heart was broke and her reality had disintegrated. Her whole life people had been terrified of synth, of family members being replaced, but she never expected it to happen to her. And if it did happen to her she never thought that she would prefer the replacement to her own family. Except, that’s exactly what happened. Her father was replaced, and the synth that filled his shoes was loving, kind, and a better man than her real dad had ever been. She loved him, no matter how he came into her life, what his goal was or his intentions, he made her feel like she belonged, finally.

So, she was going to fight tooth and nail to bring down the people that took him from her.

But Livy didn’t know where to start, she couldn’t go to her neighbors, they wouldn’t understand, and it’s not like she had any friends, at least none that were close enough to her for her to confide in. She was at an impass.

Then, one morning she came home from hunting, and found a single solitary holotape on her table. It was a woman, speaking about synths and how the Railroad seeks to help them. How the Railroad needs recruits, dedicated to the cause.

Which is how she winds up on the roof of a building, looking down through her scope into the broken shell of a pre-war donut shop. Which she still isn’t convinced is actually the Railroad HQ. It took her two weeks of listening to the tape over and over again, analyzing the clues written between the lines, to work up the nerve to hunt them down.

Livy shifts the rifle in her hands, using her position to scout the area again. No mines, no turrets, no guards, nothing that would imply that this building is used for anything except the occasional sleeping spot for a passing squatter. No one has entered or exited the building in the two hours that she’s been waiting, and she fears it’s a trap. She worries that the man who took her dad from her is waiting inside the shop, ready to finish the job. It’s not irrational, her thinking, and while it might have been easier to just return to her house and kill her, and it definitely would have been easier to take her out when she was collapsed in a pool of her own blood, she still worries that this is where she meets her end. This fear is what caused her to go to extreme lengths to implement protective measures around her house, inside and out, no one is getting in there without taking some heavy damage.

Except whoever left her that damn holotape.

Even if it is possible, she’s pretty sure that no one is waiting to kill her, and yet she finds herself filled with a nervous energy. When she walks inside, will the Railroad really be waiting for her, or is this all some pathetic, horrible prank? A couple of terrible people who know of her pain and want to use it for their own entertainment? She doesn’t know.

Her hands are sweaty and she wipes them on her jacket, she can’t keep waiting on this roof. They knew about her situation, which means they probably know she’s there. It’s obvious that they’re not going to come to her, she has to prove that this is what she wants, that this is where she wants to be. It’s more likely than not a test of not only her deduction and survival skills, but her loyalty to the cause.

She begins her walk off the roof.

As she approaches the shop she sees that it’s just as deserted on the inside as it looks on the outside. There’s no signs of a secret organization, although, she muses, that’s probably the point. She sweeps through each room, looking for another hint or clue that she’s in the right spot. Nothing sticks out to her in the main room, but she does pocket a few caps she finds kicked under the counter. The top floor is a mess of water and radiation damage, and even if there was a sign or note there at one point, she doesn’t see anything now. It’s not until she walks down the stairs, into what looks like an old kitchen area, that a light catches her eye.

Upon further inspection the small, red light is connected to a camera, which is pointed directly at the staircase leading down. The camera itself isn’t something she would normally look twice at, but the red light indicates that the camera actually works, and that is rare and unusual. It’s her best option.

She approaches the camera slowly and then squats down so she can look right into the lense. Nothing happens, so she pulls out the holotape and holds it up. “This was left on my kitchen table two weeks ago. I followed the clues left inside looking for the Railroad,” she pauses, hopes that the camera also has a microphone, otherwise she’s talking to herself, “my name is Olivia Larson and my father was a synth. He was taken, and I want to help fight the people who took him.” She knows she sounds a little pathetic, a little girl missing her dad, but without that pain there’s no reason for her to be there, talking into a camera, hoping against hope that there’s a secret organization watching her and sensing her genuine desires.

Minutes tick by and nothing happens, she tries not to let her disappointment show. The Railroad either isn’t here, or she failed their tests, either way all she has left is to go home. Her knee pops when she stands, a leftover symptom of her attack, but the pain hardly registers over the sadness that is slowly sweeping over her. She leaves the holotape next to the camera, they’re pretty rare and she figures that, even if they don’t want her, they might want their recruitment tape back. Right as she goes to head back up the stairs a noise makes her pause. As she looks over her shoulder she sees the wall behind her shift. Right before her eyes a door begins to form, sliding out from the wall like a magic trick.

A hidden door for a hidden organization. How clever.

Livy waits for someone to appear, but no one does, and she decides that she’s done waiting. The door opens easily once she gets a good grip on it, and cool air blows out from the cracks. The wall opens up into an elevator and she steps inside, no room for hesitation or fear. None of the buttons work when she presses them, but the elevator begins to go down anyways, taking her into the earth. It’s a long ride, and by the time she reaches the bottom her heart is pounding fast and her mouth feels dry. It’s the moment of truth.

The elevator doors open with a harsh grinding sound, exposing a metal catwalk and an open room with cinderblock walls. Just as she goes to exit a figure appears and instinctively she raises her pistol to aim at the man’s head.

He raises his hands in a defensive posture, eyes wide in shock. “Woah there! I’m not gonna hurt you.” Her eyes narrow as she scrutinizes him.

He’s an average looking guy, brown hair and eyes, blue jacket and dark red newsboy cap. He doesn’t have a weapon that she can see, and he looks genuinely nervous to have a gun in his face. Not exactly the secret agent type.

She lowers the gun, but keeps it ready. “Are you the Railroad?”

He smiles at her and something about the way he stands, open and vulnerable, relaxes her. “Not just me, but we’ll get into all that in a minute,” he holds out his hand and she grabs it for a handshake, “my name is Drummerboy, I’m here to escort you inside.”

When his grip falls she notices that he’s got a bandana in his other hand. “You’re going to blindfold me, aren’t you?”

Drummerboy shrugs. “Sorry about this, but you’re not an agent yet, and secrecy is what keeps us alive. You understand.”

She takes the material in her hands and winds it slowly around her face. “If you do anything weird or gross I will put a bullet in you.”

His laugh is low but sweet. “I honestly wouldn’t expect anything less.”

As Livy is led through the compound she’s not at all surprised when she’s walked forwards, backwards, in circles, and at one point she thinks she zigzags. They don’t want her to memorize the layout yet, and she gets it, doesn’t mean that she doesn’t feel a little sick when she gets spun around quickly. Before too long, however, she guided into a chair and her blindfold is removed.

When her eyes adjust she sees a group of people sitting across the table in front of her. There’s a man in a white shirt with his feet on the table, leaning back in a chair, wearing sunglasses. Next to him is another man, dressed in a doctor’s off-white lab coat and wearing what appears to be a permanent scowl. Seated next to him is a woman with red hair, a yellow scarf, and a curious look. She’s smoking a cigarette. Lastly, the man who met her at the elevator.

They all seem to be staring at her and it makes her nervous. Sunglasses man speaks first.

“So, Olivia-”

She interrupts him. “Livy, no one calls me Olivia.”

There’s no pause as he continues, “Livy then, we’re the Railroad, sorry about the not-so-warm-welcome, but hey, you seem like you made it just fine.”

The doctor rolls his eyes. “Deacon, be quiet. Your only role is to tell us if what she says it the truth, not provide commentary and an orientation.”

“Both of you, hush,” the red headed woman looks to Livy after sending the two men on her right a glare, “my name is Desdemona, you’ve already met Drummerboy, Doctor Carrington is next to me, and Deacon is on the end.”

“That’s a lot of D names. Was that planned?”

Right after the question leaves her mouth she finds herself mortified. Not exactly the best thing to say to the people who are in charge of her future with the Railroad. Desdemona looks shocked, Drummerboy seems to be amused, the doctor looks annoyed, but Deacon burst out into laughter, swings his legs down to the floor, and braces himself on the table.

“I like her,” he turns his head to the left, “can we keep her?”

The annoyed looks he gets don’t seem to affect Deacon, who simply wipes at fake laughter tears and goes back to leaning dangerously in his seat. Everyone looks back at her.

Carrington speaks. “No, that was not intentional. However, our names are not the concern right now. You are.” His eyes are judgemental, and his words are stiff. “You need to answer our questions, if you make it past that we will make you a temporary agent, if you prove yourself capable we will look into instating you full-time.”

She nods her understanding.

“Tell us why you want to join the Railroad.”

Starting with the hard questions first. Okay, she can do that. It’s clear they already know the answer, but she tells them anyways. As she speaks she can feel herself shaking, both anger and sadness mixing inside of her as she recounts the horrors she witnessed. When she goes to describe her father after the synth spoke a strange phrase she has to pause and collect herself. No need to talk through tears. By the end, the room is silent and Livy reaches up to swipe at her cheeks. The tears steak across her face and she wipes them on her pants.

“I’m sorry you had to go through that.” It’s Drummerboy who addresses her.

“Yeah,” she huffs a laugh out from her nose, “me too. Can we just keep going?”

Doctor Carrington nods and continues. All four of them ask her questions ranging from things that make sense like ‘would you risk your life for a synth’ - yes she would - to one’s with less than obvious reasoning like ‘what’s your favorite bar in the Commonwealth’ - The Dugout - and by the end she’s tired, ready for a nap, or maybe some lunch, and the four people across from her have agreed that she can stay.

Deacon and Carrington leave the room and she left with Desdemona and Drummerboy, he smiles at her as Des strikes up another conversation.

“You need a codename. They keep us safe and keeps your life with the Railroad separate from your life in the Commonwealth.”

“Do I have to come up with it now?”

The woman shakes her head. “No, but you need one before you can start running missions. When you think of it, tell Drummer.” With that she leaves.

Drummerboy turns to her and gestures towards the door. “Let’s get you some food and then I’ll show you to your bunk.” She follows him eagerly.

A few hours later as she digging through the Railroad resources she comes across a book of pre-war birds, it’s simple enough so she begins to read. There’s a passage about one of them that catches her eye.

“Birds in the Corvid family are known for their intelligence. In fact, many species have been known to remember human faces, especially the ones of those that have done them harm. They will pass on this information to other members of their flock and use their combined numbers to protect themselves.”

“Not only are Corvids known for their intelligence, they are also extremely loyal. They form bonds with their flock and most mate for life. They are aggressive supportive of their families, going so far as to put themselves in harm’s way in order to protect members of their flock.”

She’s reading when Drummerboy takes a seat next to her on her bunk.

“Have you thought of a codename yet?”

Livy thinks for a moment before closing the book and smirking. “Yeah, I have,” she’s sure her eyes are lit up with mischief, “you can call me Crow.”

He reaches up to squeeze her shoulder, a friendly gesture that makes her feel welcomed. “Welcome to the Railroad, Crow. We’re excited to have you.”

“Thanks Drummer, I’m excited to be here.”

- - -

Click here to go back to my OC writing master list.

[skeletonscribbles]

Wishes - Chapter 8

it’s been a minute, hasn’t it? sorry! Bill’s a toughie, and this chapter’s a lot, but it’s done, and it’s here!!

Title: “What’s This?” (Bill)

Rating: G, but like, an angsty G

Summary:  “Proposed new name for the group chat: Santa Tozier and his ho, ho, hoes!”

Warnings: unfavorable portrayal of Flynn Ryder, cryptid Stanley (although that’s less of a warning and more of a celebration of fact)

Read on Ao3!

Tag List:  @roobarrtrashmouth @jem-carstairs-is-perfection @tozier-club@aizeninlefox@stanheartsbill@latinxrichie@softeds@pretzelstoday@melancholypurple@wheezygreens@ayyyymichele @loser-marsh

BILL DENBROUGH - STILL GUEST RELATIONS, MAGIC KINGDOM

currently at the MAGIC KINGDOM CHRISTMAS PARTY AS A GUEST

DECEMBER 15th

7:15 P.M.

“Eds.”

“What.”

“I have a proposition for you.”

“If you make that joke about jingling your balls one more time, Richard –”

“I wasn’t going to do that again this time!” Richie protested, wearing an expression that indicated that he was totally going to do that again this time.

Bill winked, swung his backpack over his shoulder, and opened it, digging around through all of his various pairs of sunglasses and bottles of sunscreen until he found what he was looking for.

“Here.” He tossed Richie the tye-dyed Santa hat he’d picked up at a yard sale when he’d visited back home in early September. He’d grabbed it especially FOR Richie; his friend’s face had popped into his mind the instant he’d laid eyes on the cursed thing. “Some balls to jingle. Or, ball, as it were.”

Richie’s face lit up, and he immediately jammed the hat on to his head. His hair curled out and around it in a way that made him look a little bit like a bush that had been set on fire. “Proposed new name for the group chat: Santa Tozier and his ho, ho, hoes!”

“The group chat will be immediately deleted if you even think that phrase again,” Stan informed him flatly, eyeing the hat with an eyebrow raise that meant that he was either amused or disturbed. Bill couldn’t tell which.

Actually, Bill was having a bit of trouble reading a lot of Stan’s moods. He had way less of a handle on him than he’d imagined he had in the beginning. In retrospect, it was kind of funny how he’d thought they’d all known one another so well right out of the gate. The group dynamic was still good, for the most part, but they all still had a lot to learn about each other, and as such it was clear to everyone at this point that their convergence was hardly the freaky cosmic happenstance that at least Bev had taken it for.

That fact was on all of their minds, Bill was pretty sure - but they were nothing if not a stubborn and persistent bunch, and so they marched along, determined to have fun at this Christmas party.

“We’re getting cocoa and cookies first thing, right?” asked Bev excitedly, bouncing a little as one of the greeters fastened her wristband.

“Are we?” Ben was chewing anxiously on his lip. Bill pretended not to be affected by the nervous energy that was emanating off of his poor friend.

“It’s free,” Mike shrugged, “why not. First treat spot is at Casey’s Corner.”

“And after that? By the way, is everybody in?” Eddie stood up on his tiptoes, trying to see if everyone was accounted for. He looked to Richie, the tallest of their little group, for help, but Richie was still preoccupied with the hat, so he switched over to staring pleadingly at Bill.

“Uh.” Bill counted quickly in his head - he could see Stan with his wristband, Bev, Richie, Eddie, the greeter was finishing putting a band on Ben, and…where was Mike?

“We’re all set.” Mike was behind him. He spoke clearly and stepped forward, clapping a hand on Eddie’s shoulder. “I was wondering if you thought we should hit up Princess Fairytale Hall after Casey’s? I know that there’s rare characters out and about.”

Eddie stared up at Mike’s face, and then back down at the hand that was still down on his shoulder. Bill crossed his arms over his chest, willing back a snarl. This wasn’t the first time in the last couple of weeks that Mike had been a little extra distant, a little extra touchy with other people. Bill had taken a lot of flack from Beverly in the wake of their relationship about his possessiveness and penchant for jockeying himself into a more dominant position in his interactions with others, so he was trying to be cool, but it wouldn’t last much longer. He was going to snap and ask Mike what the fuck was going on, and it was probably going to happen sooner rather than later.

Bill’s only solace in the fact that Mike’s hand was now making its way down Eddie’s arm was the fact that Richie was blatantly unhappy about it, too. He was hovering behind Eddie in a way that would have been distinctly threatening, if he were anyone but Richie, and his eyes were locked on Mike’s hand with an unearthly sort of intensity.

“Um.” Eddie’s voice brought Bill back to Earth, kind of. His stomach was still kind of twisted up, but it would subside, probably, as long as Mike kept the weird interactions to a minimum. Richie’s gaze, on the other hand, only seemed to grow MORE intense, to the point where Bill was genuinely concerned that Mike was going to be able to feel it if Richie didn’t dial things back soon. “I think Flynn Ryder’s there, if I remember everyone’s schedule correctly. That of interest to anyone?”

“Yes,” Stan said, a little too quickly. Bill crossed his arms tighter and squeezed his eyes shut for a split second.

“Okay, so we can do that, and then maybe head to Ad-Lib?” Ben was still a little pale, but that was irrelevant in the face of the fact that he was also mercifully sane when the rest of them were so clearly not. “I want to hear Richie go through the Jingle Cruise spiel.”

Richie blinked and tore his eyes away from Mike’s hand, which had finally, FINALLY retracted from Eddie’s arm. “I’m flattered, Hanscom, but I’m not on the clock. We can do Jingle, and I’ll probably heckle the shit out of whoever our skip is, but if you want to catch one of my botes you gotta do it on your own time.”

“Still good with me.” Ben smiled weakly, obviously aware of the quiet, crackling tension in the air and wanting desperately to diffuse it. “After that, we can talk about mapping out the rest of our night? The Christmas Wishes show is at 9, and I’d like to try and catch the parade…”

“I love the parade!” Bev was right there with him. “What do you say, boys?”

“All good by me.” Mike was amiable as ever. “Y’all?”

“Y’all? You’re not even from the South, Mikey, what the hell. I’m good for whatever,” Richie said, although once again, his face suggested that he was still apprehensive.

“Same,” agreed Stan, giving Richie a quick, meaningful look. Beside him, Eddie was also nodding.

“Let’s go to PFH, you guys. I know people. We’ll cut the line. It’ll be great.”

“Casey’s first,” Bev insisted. “Sugar cookies. Need it. C’mon.”

She grabbed for Ben’s hand and tugged, and with almost no resistance, Ben stumbled along behind her. That left the rest of them no choice but to try and keep up, which made for a less romantic stroll down Main Street than Bill had been hoping for.

Why was he letting himself get so disappointed by the little things tonight?

“We’ll have time later for you to play tour guide, yaknow.” Richie had slowed down his walk to keep pace with Bill. He seemed to be the only person in tune with Bill’s feelings at the moment, which was absolutely bizarre, given that their relationship over the past three years had mostly been built on brief, comic interactions and a series of mostly work related favors. “Although as ideas go, that one’s not exactly stellar.”

“Why not?” Bill squinted over at Richie, who was looking at the back of Eddie’s neck in front of him with longing in his eyes. “I mean, if you’ve got info about the park, might as well dispense it, no?”

“It makes non-park folks a little antsy sometimes,” Richie responded neatly, looking away from Eddie and between Bill and Stan. Bill grimaced, and swallowed hard.

“Has he said–?”

“No, but I know him.” Richie sped up his walk a little bit, obviously hoping to keep up a little bit better with Eddie. “It’s just a suggestion.”

“Noted,” Bill muttered, watching with no small amount of envy as Richie sidled up to Eddie and slid his huge, clumsy hand into Eddie’s neat little one. Stan and Mike were way too far ahead for Bill to be able to catch up with at this point, and given how the night was going so far, he wasn’t really sure if he wanted to catch up at all.

Bev was already halfway through her serving of sugar cookies by the time Bill entered Casey’s Corner. Ben was beside her, holding a cup of hot cocoa that obviously didn’t belong to him, and he shrugged apologetically as Bill walked towards them.

“Good, Bev?” Bill smiled quietly at her as she worked to swallow the bite of cookie she had in her mouth. His relationship with Bev, at least, was consistent.

“Perfect.” Crumbs sprayed from her mouth as she talked, but Bill and Ben were unfazed. In fact, Ben’s gaze seemed to grow more fond, if that was even possible. (Bill was SO glad they’d found each other. He couldn’t have asked for a better situation for his friend.)

“Seconded!” Richie’s mouth was just straight up full of cookie. Apparently, he couldn’t be bothered to swallow before speaking. Bill wasn’t surprised, but he couldn’t help but be a little disappointed, if only because he’d just had cookie crumbs spit in his direction. “They got the good shit this year, not the cheap shit. Hallelujah. If the Snickerdoodles at Harbor House are even half this good, I’m gonna cum in my pants.”

“That all it takes?” Eddie was wearing a small little smile, and his ears were red in a way that suggested that even he couldn’t quite believe the question that had come out of his mouth. Richie turned his head slowly to stare over at him wondrously, like he was a Christmas present that Richie hadn’t expected to get.

“Eds, are you trying to seduce me in a hot dog restaurant?” To anyone else, that would sound like an incredulous joke, but Bill knew that Richie was excited and totally sincere. There was really no place more fitting for a Richie Tozier seduction than a restaurant that sold overpriced phallic foods.

“That depends,” Eddie said, blush spreading to his cheeks, “is it working?”

Bill was hit, suddenly and extremely, with a wave of jealousy that was relatively akin to nausea.

“No fucking way.” Bill pushed his way towards the exit of the restaurant. “You assholes. Gonna be gross and ruin everything.”

Richie yelled something indecipherable back at him (his mouth was obviously full of food again) but Bill was long gone. He exited the doors of the restaurant and stared down Main Street, trying to ignore whatever emotional ache had taken up residence in his bones.

He felt a familiar hand on his shoulder after about a minute and a half. “Bill. What’s up.”

“I’m okay, Stan.” Bill covered Stan’s hand with his own for a quick second, and then pulled away. “Just cranky.”

“Is this something we should talk about later?” Stan asked, obviously taking pains to keep his voice neutral.

Bill pressed his lips into a tight line, and then nodded curtly. “Later.”

“You wanna take a picture with me, Mike, and Flynn when we get to PFH?” Stan continued carefully. It was clear that he had noticed Bill’s behavior when they were making plans earlier.

Bill focused his eyes on Stan’s and took a deep breath. There were wrinkles of concern (or maybe amusement?) around his eyes, and Bill tried to let himself be comforted by Stan’s obvious emotional response, but it wasn’t taking. Sighing, he slid his hands over and across Stan’s shoulders, wondering why he couldn’t get his brain to settle down.

“Yeah,” he finally replied, looking back at Stan’s face. “We can do that.”

“Let Mike work this out,” Stan told him, eyebrows drawn and serious, “okay? He’s never dated white people before. It’s like…an identity crisis for him.”

“Has he been talking to you about this?” Bill asked, caught off guard.

“Let’s go, boys!” The remaining five members of their group were pushing their way out of Casey’s and collectively ignoring the fact that Richie’s hot chocolate was sloshing everywhere, including back on to Richie’s green Goofy Christmas sweater. Eddie was leading the pack, looking more confident than Bill had ever seen him. “Rapunzel awaits!”

Stan took one more long, lingering look at Bill, then turned to go join the group, pulling Bill along with him by the hand. Bill let himself be taken, and put a pin in his questions and feelings for later as they crossed through the castle and into Fantasyland.

Mike slowed his walk and joined Bill and Stan as Pinocchio’s Village Haus came into sight. “Doing okay, babes?”

“We’re good,” Bill responded mechanically, absently letting go of Stan and moving towards Mike so that he could brush cookie crumbs off of his chin. “Flynn Rider?”

“Yeah, Eddie’s really gung-ho about it,” Mike nodded, seemingly not noticing Bill’s robotic response. “I think he’s really proud to show us all where he works and who he works with.”

“He knows I see him there all the time, right?” Bill asked, looking questioningly from Stan to Mike.

Stan shot him a slightly exasperated glance. “Mike really means that he’s proud to show Richie where he works, I think.”

“And the rest of us,” Mike defended. “It’s the first time we’ve done something like this before, all seven. It’s kind of a big deal.”

“Are you guys coming or what?” Eddie called from the beginning of the Princess Fairytale line, bouncing eagerly on the tips of his toes. Beside him, Bev was mirroring his movements, and Ben and Richie were watching both of them with mild trepidation.

“Yes,” Stan said firmly, and the three of them walked single file down and through the doorway of Princess Fairytale Hall. Eddie led with aplomb, and when they reached the character attendant at the head of the line, they were let through without question or issue. They didn’t even have to tell her how many people were in their party. Bill was impressed in spite of himself at how much pull Eddie seemed to have with the entertainment (and entertainment adjacent) cast.

“Rapunzel’s one of my favorites,” Bev admitted, shooting Ben a toothy smile. “I’ve never met Flynn Ryder before.”

“I knew some people who were in charge of putting up the Rapunzel section of New Fantasyland a couple of years ago,” Ben said, smiling back. “They were so mad that their area didn’t have rides or meet and greets or anything. Felt like it was a waste to just make it a bathroom.”

“Best bathrooms in the park, though,” Richie jumped in, “I should know, I’ve tested every single one–”

The female character attendant leaned her head back in. “Rapunzel and Flynn are ready for you now!”

“Are they though,” Stan mused out loud, “are they really?”

“Thanks, Lauren,” Eddie said, touching her arm gratefully. She gave him a sweet, genuine smile, and then disappeared behind the door again. “She’s such a sweetheart, you guys.”

“Are you, like, your whole area’s GBF, or what?” Bill couldn’t help but ask.

“GBF?” Eddie turned towards him, confused.

“Gay best friend,” Bill explained, smiling a little bit at the thought that Eddie Kaspbrak, of all people, had not encountered that acronym before. Behind Eddie, Richie was making a face like Bill had grown an extra head, and Bev was eyeing him with concern as well.

Had he made a mistake…?

Eddie stiffened, and turned back towards the door. “I’m nobody’s GBF, or whatever. You should know better, Denbrough. Let’s go.”

“You’re such an idiot sometimes,” Stan muttered as they shuffled forward, and Bill felt his face grow hot. What had he done? There was really no predicting what Eddie would take offense to, so why was Stan asking him to?

Was he just paranoid…?

Rapunzel and Flynn were waiting for them with open arms when they walked into the elaborately decorated room. Rapunzel swept her eyes over all of them, beaming, but Flynn had locked on a target: Eddie Kaspbrak’s little freckled nose.

Bill shifted so that he was standing closer to Richie. Catastrophe was in the air on all fronts, and Bill didn’t want to take any chances.

“Well hello there, sweetheart,” Flynn grinned, eyes never leaving Eddie’s as he shifted into his trademark smolder. “I think I’ve seen you before, yeah? Wouldn’t forget a face like yours - I bet they even get your nose right on the posters–”

“Hey, dude,” Bill found himself saying, trying to cut things short before Richie could get a word in edgewise, “how’s it going? Hit by any frying pans recently?”

Flynn looked up at Bill, unimpressed. “We’ve moved past that point in our relationship, haven’t we dear?”

“Oh, I don’t know,” and Bill was almost surprised when it was Rapunzel that responded to ‘dear’ instead of Eddie, “I do love using my frying pan, and you’re no saint.” She was looking flintily at Flynn, too - apparently she was also cognizant of whatever situation was brewing.

“I bet he’s terrible, isn’t he?” Richie was done keeping his mouth shut. Bill shoved his hands in his pockets, looked down, and hoped for the best. “Not so much of a fan of the frying pan method myself - luckily, Eddie here is always a saint.” He grabbed Eddie’s hand to punctuate his point. “How do we feel about taking frying pans to people that flirt with other people’s boyfriends, though, because–”

“Let’s just get a picture,” Stan interrupted, moving to stand between Rapunzel and Flynn. “Please.”

The rest of the group acquiesced almost immediately, desperate to keep Richie from cutting in again. The picture was probably going to come out horribly. There was no way that anyone was smiling genuinely.

“You never said you had a boyfriend, Eddie,” Bill heard Flynn whisper lowly as the camera flash went off.

“I definitely did say that,” Eddie hissed back, and then it was over, and they were being waved out.

“Who the fuck was that guy?” Bev asked as soon as everyone was back out and under the warm, hazy lights of Fantasyland.

“His name is Jeremy,” Eddie said, bitter, “and he’s a real tool, but did you really have to go there, Richie? Really? I was handling it.”

Richie opened his arms and tilted his hands so that his palms were angled towards the sky. “Can you blame me? Did you see the way he was looking at you? Total fucking pervlord. How many of the princes are like that?”

“Enough,” Eddie admitted, “but you can’t fucking do that every time someone—I mean, you know that. You know how I feel about–” and he fell silent for a moment, obviously struggling to find the words that he wanted, “about–”

“Yeah.” Richie’s voice had dropped an octave, and for the first time in three years, Bill saw genuine embarrassment in his eyes. “I’m sorry, Eds.”

Eddie’s expression softened, too. “Let’s just go to Harbor House, okay? Snickerdoodles, and then Jungle?”

“I love snickerdoodles!” Mike, ever positive, was visibly desperate to get the outing back on the rails. He edged backwards, clearly ready to walk over to Liberty Square. Bill wanted to touch him; wanted to run his hand over his back assuringly, but felt like he couldn’t, for whatever bizarre reason. Mike was totally out of reach tonight. “I think that’s a great plan.”

“Liberty ho,” Ben called, walking over to the sword in the stone and making a show of trying to pull it out to underscore his command. Bev laughed and immediately went to join him, and soon all seven of them were around and on top of each other, lost in the complete chaos of having seven people trying to extract a single sword from a stone they knew wasn’t going to yield. It was the perfect tension diffuser, and even as he cursed Bev out for slipping and using his hair to catch herself, Bill was grateful. Ben always knew how to get things spinning again.

After a few minutes of their seven person excavation attempt, they piled off of the stone, laughing and stumbling towards Liberty Square (much to the relief of every single Fantasyland cast member).

“We should have taken a picture,” bemoaned Bev, fixing her hair in her phone camera.

“Yeah, that would have been good for Instagram,” Richie joked, “caption it: ‘writhing mass of limbs fails to pull plastic sword from plastic rock’.”

“We’re a cryptid,” Stan realized, expression comedically alight, and with that, Bill couldn’t help but spend the rest of the walk to Liberty Square insisting that they ride Mansion given their new cryptid status. He was shot down, 5-2. (Mike, for the first time all night, was on his side, but to no avail.) Harbor House was a momentary pitstop that was more ‘how many cookies can Richie stuff down his pants without getting kicked out of the restaurant’ than legitimate break, and then it was on through the Adventureland Veranda towards the Jungle.

Every single CP that was working (which was like…6 CPs, they really understaffed the park for parties) at Jungle recoiled when they saw Richie coming.

“What did we do to deserve this?” asked the gangly, gawky kid at Greeter as they approached, peering nervously up at Richie from under the brim of his safari hat. “Thought you were off today, Rich.”

“I can’t believe you’re infamous,” Stan complained, shaking his head vigorously at his roommate.

“I’m not good with kids, Stanny. Sorry,” Richie said, approaching Gangly Limbs. “Anyway, what’s it to you, Noodle? It’s not like I’m working a shift.”

“Yeah, but–” the kid started, stepping forward to try and get Richie to back off, but when Richie didn’t move, the poor kid immediately caved. “Okay. Whatever. Rosa will probably let you commandeer her bote if you ask.”

Richie winced. “Rosa’s spieling? Dude.”

“I know.” The kid shook his head, sighing. “Neil Patrick Harris came through two parties ago and rode Rosa’s bote. It was embarrassing all around.”

“How do I always miss celebrities?” Richie whined at the same time that Stan yelped, “You guys see guests like Neil Patrick Harris?!?”

Bill stepped in with an answer for Stan. “Yeah, MK’s pretty lucky that way. One of my coworkers was assigned to Chris Pratt a week or so ago, and another is going to be the VIP Guide for Chris Evans’ annual trip in like, three days.”

Stan rolled his eyes and tugged agitatedly at a curl. “Park privilege. Ugh.”

“Anyway,” the kid tried again, clearly anxious to have them gone, “go up the Fastpass line, Richie. No one will complain.”

Richie fixed him with a flat look. “I’ve been here for three years, kid. I know what I’m doing.”

“Let’s just go, okay?” Eddie tugged on Richie’s sleeve anxiously. Gawky Kid shot him a grateful smile.

“See you later, Noodle,” Richie waved, still obviously unimpressed. The kid was going to be on the receiving end of Richie roasts and pranks for weeks, Bill was sure.

When their bote came around the corner, Richie informed them unenthusiastically that their tour guide was indeed going to be Rosa, and proceeded to complain about how unfunny she was until Mike unceremoniously cut him off.

“Rich. Why don’t you just jack the mic?”

Richie shifted awkwardly and looked down into the greenish brown water. “Not my place, probably.”

“Why are you embarrassed of this?” Stan, as always, cut right to the chase. “I’ve ridden your bote. Bill’s been on your bote. I think Bev’s been on your bote. Is it Mike? Ben?”

They all knew what Stan was getting at, and most of them had the decency to look away while Richie processed what was actually going on up in his brain. Bill, however, had never been a decent man (not by his own reckoning, anyway), and so he kept his eyes glued to Richie, watching with interest as Richie fastidiously avoided looking at Eddie.

“You don’t have to be embarrassed in front of me, Richie,” Eddie said quietly. “I’m not gonna stop liking you. You know that, right?”

“Getting there,” Richie muttered. “You guys really want a Richie Tozier show?”

“Yes!” The response was instantaneous. All six of them snapped back around, staring at Richie expectantly.

“Well all right then.” Richie smiled softly. It was a small smile, but there was no doubt in Bill’s mind that it was genuine. “Let’s go, then. I’m not gonna give you my usual safetly spiel, but like…don’t slip when you get into the boat. The Richie Tozier express dumps dead weight, so if you fall and hit your head, you’re toast. Gator food.”

“If you truly dumped dead weight, you’d have tossed yourself over a long time ago,” Bev quipped, and the group was immediately back to that safe, happy sword-in-the-stone place. Good. Bill wasn’t sure how many more ups and downs he could stomach over the course of the night.

Rosa surrendered her vehicle immediately once she saw Richie on the dock (he seemed to be a source of great terror for the current crop of CPs), and Richie took up the Skipper mantle neatly and immediately, jumping on board and switching out his tye-dye Santa hat for Rosa’s Jungle Skipper Santa hat. He grabbed the mic with aplomb and started waving it around obnoxiously. “This thing on? Just kidding, it doesn’t have to be, I’m loud as fuck. Sorry, frick,” he apologized, eyeing the coordinator on the side of the dock. “Sit down and be amazed, Benjamin. You’re about to risk your life by being in a vehicle with me to see a bunch of shadowy show scenes because the lighting on this attraction is trash. It’s Christmas themed, though, so it’s at least like…jolly. Fun! Any last words?“

Bill had, of course, been on Richie’s bote probably hundreds of times, so the spiel wasn’t entirely new to him (even if it was Jingle rather than Jungle). That being the case, he chose to spend the bote ride watching his friends.

Ben was absolutely enraptured by Richie. It had obviously been a while since he’d ridden the Jungle Cruise, and to Richie’s delight, that meant that Ben laughed at even the more stale, scripted jokes. Beside him, Bev was giggling less at Richie’s jokes and more at Ben’s earnestness. The two of them were adorable, even if Ben was still looking a little pale and shaky.

Stan was…unreadable, again. He kept his eyes trained on Richie the whole ride, but in such a way that Bill could genuinely not tell whether he was annoyed by Richie’s tirade or proud of him for it. Bill wondered whether both of those options weren’t true. In contrast, Mike wasn’t looking at Richie at all. He was staring off of the side of the bote contemplatively, as if weighing two incredibly difficult decisions. The sight of him made Bill feel inexplicably wary, as if something bad was coming down the pipeline.

Okay, that was definitely just paranoia.

Finally, Eddie….God, the Eddie that had shown up for this party was not an Eddie that Bill had ever seen before. Eddie’s nervous exterior was still very much intact, but there was a really clear and distinct excitement and longing behind his jittery outer shell when he looked at Richie, and it made Bill wonder whether Eddie had ever really felt heckled by Richie in Adventureland at all. There were absolutely no signs of exasperation in Eddie’s face or body, which was absolutely astonishing. He was completely devoted to hearing, seeing, experiencing Richie.

When the ride ended, Bill was more than a little jealous. What was working with Richie and Eddie that wasn’t working with he, Stan, and Mike? What was working with Ben and Bev?

“And as we end our two week trip through however many rivers I just said we trekked through, I just wanted to say,” Richie was finishing, leaning carelessly back against the front of the bote and not breaking eye contact with Eddie, “that you’ve been the cutest group I’ve ever brought through here, and when I say that, I am of course only referring to Eddie. Anyways…I was thinking, nay, planning ahead earlier in the week, and so tell me, folks: if I say, made hotel reservations in Anaheim in July, whaddya say we make a trip, just the seven of us Losers?”

There was a quick, astonished silence as they all processed Richie’s words, and then:

“FUCK yeah!”

“I’ve never been to Disneyland!”

“I’ll see if I can get time off, that would be awesome–”

“You’re a genius, Rich!”

Eddie, for his part, did not respond. Instead, he calmly stood up (despite Richie’s earlier warnings against moving in the bote), pushed his way to the front, and attached his lips firmly to Richie’s.

Bill watched them for thirty whole seconds before it occurred to him to look away or do anything else. Fortunately, he was covered by the fact that Ben was clapping loudly and Bev was wolf-whistling. He joined in with the clapping, feeling strangely embarrassed…not that he had any reason to be. Well, no, he kind of had a reason to be. Now that Richie and Eddie had finally taken that particular plunge (Bill was like, 95% sure that they were witnessing their first official kiss), they didn’t seem to be stopping. People had to yell from the docks to get Richie to pull away and drive the bote back up to unload.

He looked back over at Stan, and found that Stan was looking at Mike with a sweet, tender expression. They were having a moment…and Bill wasn’t a part of it.

When it was time to disembark, Bill jockeyed to be the first one out of the bote, pushing hastily to get himself on to shore. He’d had enough of being jostled by waves he wasn’t prepared for.

If they were going to make it to July, some serious conversation was going to have to happen.

[kapsbrakclapsback]

Dreammaker, You Heartbreaker (1/?)

I’ve got chapter 1 of the Breakfast At Tiffany,s AU! It’s also on AO3. But here it is! Based on @takealottodragmeawayfromreddie‘s awesome idea. 

The lost man moves with a purpose, walking with a fashionable black evening coat paired with a coffee to-go and a Danish, the oil of the pastry leaving dark yellow-gray stains on the white paper bag. Sunglasses stand on the bridge of his nose, and no passerby can read his story from his eyes because of them. The city feels awfully tall as it surrounds him, but as big as the world around him is, he can still hear the soft taps that his slightly worn but high end shoes make on the pavement below him.

Maybe he’s been walking for hours, maybe minutes. We don’t know, and it’s not even clears if he knows. Nonetheless, he stops, sure in his halted step as he makes a sharp turn to face the large, shiny shop window. He takes a sip of the bitter coffee and just lets himself look.

Everything about it gleams. Tiffany's was like heaven as imagined through children's books, full of sparkle and shine. The shine itself takes on a new, indecipherable meaning in the kind light of the 7 am rising sun.

He takes a bite of his Danish and lets his head tilt in fascination, Let’s his concealed eyes scatter about the magic charm of it all. He wonders for a second if he should take the glasses off, but remembers that his hands are full and decides that he probably couldn’t comprehend Tiffany's if he got to view it in its unshaded glory.

This is god, he thinks. This is salvation, this is heaven. Nothing bad can happen here.

He gives himself a few more moments to heal, to let the power of Tiffany's and all of its glittering diamonds seep into his soul. Then, he pulls his eyes away from it, and begins the walk to his apartment building, falling into step with the collage of New Yorkers until he is more part of the pavement than he is an individual.

——

When Eddie got out of his impossibly bright yellow taxi and pulled out his suitcase (the rest of the boxes were to come later, he'd been told), he took a moment to stand on the sidewalk and just look.

He gazed at the way that the city popped and whirred to life around him, like some grey-brown toy store. Everything around him was tall, com the buildings to the pedestrians, but Eddie had been short for a long enough time to know that the feeling was to be expected in most new places. People of all types passed him as he let his gaze travel across every surface. Despite the circumstances, he felt freedom burn in his throat, felt it sear behind his eyes.

He heard the taxi drive away, but didn’t tear his eyes away from the cityscape. It was only when some gruff shoulder knocked against Eddie's, and he was pulled back to earth. After taking a moment to collect himself, Eddie walked out of the flowing sidewalk and onto the steps of the apartment building.

Before walking in, he reached into his pocket for the key that would let him into the set of hallways to get to his room. When it wasn’t in his right jacket pocket, he checked the left and then the right again. Panic grew, blossoming into a fire when there was no unchecked pocket and no key to the building, only to his apartment.

He took a breath in and another one out, but the effort was futile. He still felt like he was on the verge of combustion when he decided to just ring up a room to ask to be let in.

Eddie let himself into the lobby-of-sorts of the apartment building (it was a mostly blank room consisting of a board and a locked door), and tried to cool the panic stirring up in his lungs with a long breath. He took note of the inhaler in his back pocket to calm himself before settling himself before the board of his destiny, as his occasionally fantastical mind referred to it.

Sufficiently convinced that he could handle the next set of events, whatever the hell they were, Eddie stared at the grid of pearly white buttons. He let the pads of his fingers trail softly over them, the romantic streak in his mind looking at the possibilities hidden in it. His hand, of its own accord as far as Eddie's concern, drifted to the mid-left of the broad board. He took a look at the room number, just to be sure (it was E4, and the number/letter pair burned itself into his mind with a crisp harshness. He supposed it was a result of his heightened emotion). Finally, he put his index finger on the button and pushed firmly, leaving no room for hesitation.

The piercing, alarm like sound was unpleasant for him, but he persisted until whoever was on the other end answered back.

"Who is this?" asked a rough voice, raspy with sleep. Eddie smiled despite himself, glad that he actually got a response.

"Eddie, Eddie Kapsbrak. I just moved in, and I don’t have my building key. Could you let me in?"

"What time is it?" Based on the slow, fatigued rhythm of the voice on the other end, Eddie presumed that he had only heard about half of what he had said. A yawn could be heard through the rickety speaker, further solidifying the tiredness of the man in E4.

"10:30, if my watch is anything to go by," said Eddie, carefully stepping around his words, making sure they were slow and not too rambling. He still felt the panic itch beneath his skin, but began to put on the most calm, collected face he could.

"Shit! Do you have a bottle of water, by any chance? I have an appointment and I can't turn myself into a man worthy of New York this quickly without help."

The request was odd, but Eddie still peeked into his satchel to check, and smiled lightly when he found an unopened bottle.

"I’ve got water. Room E4, right?"

"Absolutely. Come on up."

Eddie heard a click, and strode towards the door, feeling optimism beneath his feet. He pushed the door to the building open with ease- it wasn’t not the grand, decorated door at the building's front, this one was thinner and had a weaker knob- and he held his case, letting it swing back and forth as he made his way down a hall and up a flight of stairs. He followed this pattern until he reached the fifth floor. He let his free hand trail on the painted white banister by his side, but quickly retracted it at the feeling of dust beneath his fingertips.

He stopped in place, holding his hand mid-air to figure out what to do about the dust. He could feel the tips of his fingers begin to itch, and he had read enough about dust to know its dangers. Before Eddie could take a second to think, he jerkily wiped it off on the front of his jacket, before realizing that he had basically just transferred the dangerous substance from his skin to another place on his body.

Idiot, idiot, idiot, he thought, berated himself with a venomous tongue. Eddie then used his palm to make brushing movements on the coat to get as much of the dust off of it as necessary before pulling out some hand sanitizer from a pocket inside his coat.

He put a copious amount of the aloe vera scented jelly on his hands, and scrubbed with veracity as he continued walking, stilted and distracted, his attention focused on purging the dust from his vicinity. His mind began cycling through the possibilities, but was interrupted as he gave a glance to the placard next to a door, and was shocked out of his illness infested reverie with the realization that he was a few rooms away from E4.

E1 may have looked the same as E2 which looked the same as E3, but E4 was an anomaly, a misfit among the uniform set of doors. First, there was a welcome mat, and a well used one at that. There were scrapes of dried mud, and the corner was stained with a faded crimson color, probably red wine. There were some words printed on it, but they were worn past readability. Eddie knocked three times, keeping a borderline musical pattern to them. He didn’t get a response for a long enough time that he moved his hand to knock again, but he was interrupted as the door was swung open, revealing the man who lived in E4.

Eddie found his breath taken away, but not in the way that he was used to. The man was dressed in a tuxedo shirt that was a few sizes too big (on second thought, it probably didn’t even belong to him) and a novelty sleeping mask pushed onto his forehead. The mask was rose pink with shiny gold eyelashes, and it must’ve been either a gag gift or a party favor. He was lanky, with wild, dark hair that curled around in effortless twirls. There was a smattering of freckles around his nose and cheeks, and he had cheekbones that made Eddie want to collapse in the middle of the hallway.

The amount of time it took for Eddie to find himself helplessly infatuated with him was about the same amount of time as it took for the man to collect himself from his slumber just enough to groggily open his mouth.

"D’ya have the water, Eds?" he asked, voice dragging and low.

"Don’t call me Eds," Eddie responded without thought, shaking himself a bit as he grabbed the water out of his satchel and handing it to the guy, who grabbed it with a heavy hand and casually beckoned Eddie inside.

"Hey, what’s your name?" Eddie asked, stepping in after him carefully, putting his satchel and suitcase next to the doorway.

"Richie Tozier's my name, and breaking hearts is my game," slurred Richie, smiling to himself at some hidden memory, before uncapping the water and taking a deep, long drink. Eddie felt his heart twinge in an odd, bitter way.

Richie continued to drink, and Eddie took a look around his apartment.

E4 was as unusual on the inside as it was on the outside, as it was simultaneously cluttered and empty. There was a nice couch which had just been slept on, if the blanket and pillows were anything to go by, but it was paired with the oddest side table Eddie had ever seen. It was misshapen and crooked, like a shop class project gone wrong. Curled at a leg of the side table was a tan-colored cat, who slept peacefully.

"You have a cat?" Eddie asked, eying the pet with wariness, remembering a specifically scarring testimonial he read about a claw scratching out an eye that had made him swear off pets when he first read it in college.

"Yep. His name's Cat," Richie answered, putting down the bottle and moving to the other side of the living room. There, he pulled off the eye mask and placed it on top of a stack of newspapers.

"Short for Catherine? Nice pun."

"No, he’s just Cat. As in the animal. He’s a free spirit, doesn’t need a name. We're kindred spirits, him and I. I barely have a name myself," explained Richie, his voice becoming floaty as he became a bit more alert. He grabbed a hairbrush from the seat of a wooden rocking chair, and began to casually run it through his hair as he rambled.

"How can you barely have a name? Everyone has a name, whether they like it or not," said Eddie, following Richie as he moved to get something from his bedroom. He leaned against the doorway, arms crossed, as he watched Richie fish around for something.

"What if someone is called by everything but their name? What if people just point at them and start talking? They don’t really have a name," said Richie, as he found what he was apparently looking for at the bottom of a small basket. He held up the glinting slip of metal victoriously, and on second sight, Eddie realized that it was a jeweled clip.

"Well then, I guess their name is just 'Hey you', or the name that they introduce themselves as. You can’t just not have a name."

"Maybe so," replied Richie, lackadaisical and gorgeous in the pink lampshaded lights of his room. He peered into a mirror and slipped it into his hair, before grabbing a wide brimmed hat on his bedside table. An easy silence followed, before curiosity stirred in Eddie once more.

"So, what’s with the rush? What big event warrants all of..." Eddie trailed off, trying to find the right word for the flurry of hair clips and clutter that was this whole event, before finally choosing to make a noncommittal hand gesture as he said "this".

"I’m seeing Sally Tomato, and visiting hours are tight. He’s in Sing Sing right now, and I’ve got to give him the weather report," said Richie as he finished his sentence by moving into the adjoining bathroom.

"Sing Sing? The jail?"

Richie stuck his head out of the bathroom doorway to answer, and it was so cartoonish and peculiar that Eddie felt the corners of his mouth turn up, almost against his will.

"You know, I always thought that Sing Sing should be the name of an opera house," said Richie, and he then left Eddie's sight again. Eddie, however, could hear strains of an impression of an opera singer through the distance. It wasn’t a refined mimic, as the voice drifting through the doorways was more Richie's than anyone else’s, but it held an odd charm.

Richie then darted out of the bathroom, arms outstretched as he searched for something on the floor. He paused to look up at Eddie, staring bemusedly down at him.

"I’m looking for shoes, nice black ones. Shiny. You’ll know it’s mine if there’s a white line on the sole, it’s how I keep track of them at parties," he then dived under his bed, and Eddie decided not to contemplate on parties that required an absence of shoes and instead went looking.

There another stretch of silence, now accompanied with the musical sounds of shuffling through a messy bedroom, before Eddie spoke up again.

"You mentioned a weather report. What’s the deal with that?"

"Well, my good old friend Sally passes along messages with another one of my jail visitor friends. They’re always weird things, but never funny enough, which is a real shame. I mean, if you’re just going to tell each other the weather, might as well make it fun, right? But my little Sun-Dried Tomato wants me to quote verbatim, like some kind of fuckin' Latin teacher. It’s ridiculous, but what can you do? I mean, one time I- Found it! Got one shoe out of two. Any luck, Eds?"

Eddie tried to will the cobweb off of his left hand while making a sad gesture with his right.

"No luck whatsoever."

Richie, in that moment, seemed to be hit with some divine inspiration, looking past Eddie at a rickety wardrobe.

"Can you reach deep, deep in the clothes part of the wardrobe? I think Bev may have pulled something. That’s her usual stash space."

"Is Bev in Sing Sing too?" asked Eddie as he followed the instructions, his palm touching the (dusty, so ridiculously dusty) back wall of the wardrobe  as he fanned it across to find the shoes. Richie was laughing softly at something Eddie couldn’t decipher when Eddie's hand hit the trademark stiff leather of a nice shoe, and he grabbed it with confidence, pulling them out victoriously.

Richie gave a cheer, and Eddie threw it across the room. Richie's catch was successful despite Eddie's inability to aim, and Richie disappeared back into the bathroom. Eddie, officially in the bedroom of a guy he had just met, took a deep breath and looked around.

This was an unknown feeling, the feeling of newness as it crashed its waves on him. He breathed it in, let himself soak in the unfamiliarity of it, until he was interrupted by the squeaking of door hinges. He looked to the door of the bathroom, and felt himself drown.

If Richie was beautiful in sleepwear and an eye mask, he was absolutely breathtaking in his streetwear.

His outfit, a semi-casual suit with a wide brimmed hat, was a fascinating sort of elevated normalcy. Richie himself, Eddie realized, was a sort of elevated normalcy. He had routines and schedules and everything that made Eddie dread daylight, but every movement was accompanied by a panache that was addicting.

"Do I look okay?" asked Richie, doing a goofy twirl.

"Yeah, I guess," replied Eddie, closing his dropped jaw and trying to play it cool. Richie rolled his eyes, smiling brightly as he pushed past the blushing Eddie, who followed his path as it led both of them into the hallway.

Finally, there Eddie stood, a changed man in the cramped quarters of the carpeted hallway in his new apartment building, the man of his dreams on his way out. Richie's back was turned as he flitted down the hall, swinging a bag with one hand and adjusting his hat with the other, and Eddie called out to him.

"Hey, Richie!"

Richie turned around, somehow looking both hopeful and afraid.

"See you around," said Eddie, and he smiled as Richie gave a soft wave.

Richie turned back, and Eddie swiveled to the direction of his room, feeling something warm and sunny grow in him.