#really weird with the values on this one; i did like 4 tone curves and a bunch of multiply/light layers throughout

[fudgecake-charlie]

And along with it comes a certain soft glow...

Gold star for those who remember the old version of this! I wanted to do some personal art, i've been thinking about holly warburton's art again and it's nearly been three years since I made the old one, so it all coalesced into a redraw lol

[worldwidemochiguy]

Sweets (Soft Yandere! Jungkook)

You keep being visited by the most peculiar thief…

➵ in which jungkook steals your lip balm and perfume instead of talking to you, you leave a post-it note with your number on it for the strange thief who only seems to take the most inexplicable items and has a strange sense of responsibility for your wellbeing, and the cute boy in your photography class with the fluffy hair and the oversized sweater keeps getting more and more endearing…

➵ Warnings: Soft Yandere Jungkook, Breaking & Entering but without the Breaking, Reader is a bit of a ditz (lol sorry guys) 

➵ Word Count: 4.2K

➵ Masterlist

“Hello, uh, I’d like to… report a crime?” 

Your statement, which had always sounded suitably firm and assertive when you practised it in front of the bathroom mirror, ended with an unplanned upturn, making it sound more like a question than you would like. 

“Please state your name and address, ma’am.”

You did so, listening anxiously to the tap of a keyboard as your information was filed away. The undoubtedly over-worked police officer on the other end of the line sounded like he was two seconds from falling asleep, and you questioned yourself for the millionth time over whether you really needed to report this or not.

“What is the nature of the crime you are reporting, ma’am?”

“Um… well…” 

You twisted your hand into the fabric of your shirt self-consciously, trying to decide the best way to explain the strange little occurrences that had been surrounding your apartment over the last few months. You had not yet found a way to put it without sounding ridiculous, but you supposed there was a first time for everything. 

“I, uh, I think someone’s breaking into my apartment and stealing things.”

“You have an intruder?”

“Uh huh,”

“…Are they currently in your residence?”

“No, I think… they come and take things when I’m not here and then they’re gone by the time I get back.” 

“What items have been stolen?”

You bit your lip. 

“I know it sounds silly, but…”

“No crime is too small to report, ma’am. We are committed to making the lives of everyday citizens safer.”

“Well… they’ve stolen my lip balm like… several times. I keep buying new ones and they keep being stolen after a week or so. And my perfume. And my hairbrush one time, and-”

“Ma’am,” The officer cut you off with the impatience you had been both anticipating and dreading ever since you decided to call the police, “Listen, we don’t have the capacity to deal with prank callers-”

“It’s not a prank call!” You blurted, a momentary burst of desperation overtaking you, “I- um, sorry for interrupting, officer, but this isn’t a prank call. Things have been going missing. I can’t afford to keep replacing my lip balm.” 

A sigh crackled across the line, and you pictured the officer maybe taking off his glasses, pinching the bridge of his nose like those people in movies always seemed to do when they got frustrated. Personally, you had never found that it helped. 

“Are you sure you aren’t just… misplacing them?”

You gasped, offended that even a stranger could think you so stupid. “No! I remember exactly where I leave things and then they just vanish! I swear!”

“Has anything of value ever been taken from your apartment?”

“Yes!” You exclaimed, excited to be able to prove the officer wrong, “My bunny plushy! Mr Snuggles is extremely valuable to me!”

“…Monetary value, I meant. Has anything expensive ever been taken from your apartment?” 

There was an embarrassing silence. The officer sighed again, with a little more exasperation colouring his tone. 

“If anything significant is stolen, call us back. For now, just… be a bit more careful with your possessions.” 

He hung up. You pressed your forehead against the wall and wished your strange thief had taken your phone in one of his little visits. Maybe then you would’ve avoided making that agonising call. 

The next morning as you were leaving to go to class, you noticed a pile of discarded post-it notes on your desk — the remnants of a redbull-fuelled late night study session. Your newly purchased lip balm lay next to it. Impulsively, you grabbed a pen and scrawled a message on one of the post-its, sticking it horizontally to the curved surface of the lip balm tube. 

it reads: 

pls don’t take this i just bought it and this brand is actually v expensive and i am only a struggling college student with loans and chapped lips (。•́︿•̀。)

It might have been a little too polite considering it’s intended recipient was someone who had stolen multiple items from your apartment, but you figured there was no point in being rude. They probably wouldn’t even read it anyway. 

You strolled out of your apartment, planning to pick up a smoothie on the way to your lecture, and promptly forgot all about it.

 When you returned home to find a pile of newly bought lip balms on your desk — all embossed with the logo of your favourite brand — you were slightly puzzled. But, once you remembered the note you had left- well, the confusion didn’t exactly vanish, but at least you were given some context. 

The note had disappeared, along with the lip balm you had used a scant few times. But, you didn’t understand what the thief’s aim was. Why on earth would they steal small things like lip balm and perfume? And why would they buy you new copies of the product? Wasn’t that counterproductive?

you’re very bad at your job

Your next note read, stuck to your fridge as you left to grab coffee with your study group. It remained there for a few days, and you couldn’t ignore the way your heart sank a little each time you saw it hadn’t been taken. 

After six days, when it finally vanished, you felt an odd sense of happiness bubble up within you. Yes, there was someone routinely breaking into your apartment, but at least now you had an open channel of communication with them. They had left a brand new bottle of your preferred perfume — which had been stolen at least twice before you stopped bothering to buy it because perfume is pricy — resting on your kitchen counter, beside a box of your favourite chocolates. 

As you dug into the box later, snuggled in a blanket and having a Studio Ghibli film marathon, you didn’t even consider the fact that the sweets might be tampered with. If they wanted to kill me, they would’ve killed me already, you reasoned to yourself, sucking the icing sugar off your fingers. Nor did you question how they knew your favourite chocolate. If they broke into your apartment as much as you assumed they did, they probably knew you better than your own parents by now. 

You were the very definition of a broke college student. As far as you were concerned, if this random stranger wanted to buy you things and sometimes clean up your apartment — you had definitely come back to a home tidier than you had left it more than once — then you certainly weren’t going to look a gift horse in the mouth. Maybe it was a little naïve of you, but… you had already called the police, and they hadn’t cared.

thank you for the perfume and chocolate <3

You wrote next morning, hesitating slightly before putting the heart. Before you could convince yourself not to, you scribbled another line underneath. 

i wish you’d write back someday…

As you walked to class, you scolded yourself for the butterflies swooping in your stomach. They’re literally a criminal, you told yourself, Stop getting crushes on anyone who shows you the slightest bit of attention. You don’t even know their name. 

Despite the small amount of common sense that you did have mocking you all day, you sat in classes and daydreamed about your mystery home intruder. Would they read the note? Would they be happy about your appreciation? Would they — you bit your lip — would they write back? 

You felt like a dumb schoolgirl, excited by the prospect of a badly written love note shoved in her locker. And, like a school girl, you trudged back home with your arms weighed down by class work, a billion essays and quizzes that had to be completed overnight. Did your professors not realise you had a life outside of college? Not that you did, of course, but like… in principle. 

You were so preoccupied with the coursework that you didn’t even notice the note stuck to your bedroom door. After an hour of studying, you rose wearily to start fixing yourself something to eat, and your eyes snagged on a flash of yellow. 

You squeaked, almost falling over yourself in your rush to get to the door and read the note. 

i’m glad you liked them. i’m sorry i took your things, that was mean of me. i tried to only take things you wouldn’t miss, but i guess that backfired… i just wanted to feel close to you. and these notes… are the closest i’ve ever been. i know that must sound weird, but… well. i’m a weird guy, i guess. i just liked hearing from you. that’s all. 

~ koo <3

You didn’t stop freaking out for a full five minutes. After that, you poured over every detail of the letter, eager to extricate any fragment of knowledge possible. You ended up with a list which you scribbled down in your diary, above which you pasted the note. 

The list went as follows:

They want to feel close to you

They have not talked to you before, since the notes are the closest they’ve ever been, but they must have seen you in person at least once 

They are a he 

(you adamantly did not get flustered about that)

and

     4. He calls himself Koo

When you left your apartment the next morning, you placed your note on the exact same spot he had left his. An indirect touch. 

hi koo !!!!!!!!

i was so excited to see you had written something!! you know, if you want to talk to me more often, there is an easier way…

Underneath you had scrawled your phone number, hastily and not allowing for regret before you flounced out of the apartment. The reason why you were in such a rush was because you were about to go to your favourite class: Photography 101. 

You had taken it as an extra credit, something that interested you but not enough that you wanted to pursue it as a career. You had expected it to be fun, something artistic to break up the monotony of classes. What you had not expected was the dreamy boy who sat in the first row and had full possession of your heart. 

You didn’t even know his name, but you were pretty sure you were half in love with him. With fluffy brown hair that fell over his forehead whenever he leaned over to scribble down notes, and cute bunny teeth that stuck out in a flustered smile whenever the professor praised his work in class, he was perhaps the cutest boy you had ever seen. 

Though you were sure he had many girls sighing after him, he seemed to be really shy, only ever speaking in class when called on, and even then it was in a quiet, soft voice. He was kind of like you in that respect. But that was where your similarities ended. 

Yes, you thought, sighing as you watched him pay avid attention to the professor’s lecture on the composition of frames, his cute doe eyes wide and twinkling like stars were embedded in the pupils, He is way out of my league. 

It took three days for you to lose hope. You hadn’t received a text, nor had you found any notes left for you. You tried not to be disappointed, even as your traitorous sub-conscience mocked you for being able to scare away the one person who arguably paid you the most attention. 

You didn’t really have many friends, and the ones you did have preferred each other over you, and often left you out of activities because of your shy nature. You guessed this whole thing had just been a way to feel like you actually mattered to someone, like, for once, someone cared about you, but-

You were pulled out of your musings as your phone chimed. 

From: Unknown Number

[6:48 PM]

hi

this is koo

The two of you texted every day, and soon enough you were hiding your phone underneath your desk in order to chat to him, keeping your phone on your person at all times in case koo wanted to talk. Of course, the only class you didn’t do this in was Photography, so you could spend a blissful forty-five minutes staring at the boy who played the role of your husband in all of your favourite daydreams. 

Koo still broke into your house occasionally, and he still left you sweet, considerate gifts. Often, you would receive texts like this:

From: koo ✨

[3:24 PM]

sweets i’ve been checking your groceries and your vegetables are not being eaten as often as they should be 

i know you have a sweet tooth and that’s cute but please try to stay healthy

To: koo ✨

[3:25 PM]

but i can’t cook all i know how to make is microwaveable mac n cheese :///////

You came back home that day to discover a bunch of Tupperwares full of pre-made healthy meals and a note stuck to the top of them. 

try microwaving these :)

To: koo ✨

[3:01 AM]

koo are you awake?

From: koo ✨

[3:01 AM]

i am now

what’s wrong?

To: koo ✨

[3:02 AM]

i can’t sleep :////////

From: koo ✨

[3:02 AM]

sweets you need to go to bed

you have an early morning class

To: koo ✨

[3:02 AM]

i knowwwwww

i just… i can’t sleep without mr snuggles :((

From: koo ✨

[3:03 AM]

Mr Snuggles??

???

To: koo ✨

[3:03 AM]

my cuddly bunny :((((

i think you took him a while ago

could i maybe have him back…?

From: koo ✨

[3:03 AM]

Shit

i didn’t know you couldn’t sleep without him 

[3:04 AM]

sweets im so sorry

To: koo ✨

[3:04 AM]

its okay koo

From: koo ✨

[3:04 AM]

no it isn’t

you’re loosing sleep because of me

fuck

i could… bring him to you?

To: koo ✨

[3:05 AM]

you’d do that?

…i could see you?

From: koo ✨

[3:05 AM]

no i’d leave him outside

you’d have to promise not to come out until i text you saying i’ve left

To: koo ✨

[3:06 AM]

but kooooo :(((((

From: koo ✨

[3:07 AM]

sweets 

To: koo ✨

[3:07 AM]

okay :((((((((((

but i expect you to leave a big box of chocolates on my pillow for me to come home to tomorrow evening!!

From: koo ✨

[3:08 AM]

of course sweets <3

im gonna get going now

don’t look outside your apartment

To: koo ✨

[3:08 AM]

okay

From: koo ✨

[3:34 AM]

im gone and mr snuggles is waiting outside for you

he might have a little gift with him

You trudged outside your apartment, rubbing your eyes blearily, and looked down to see your beloved plushie clutching a single rose in its paws. You gasped, leaning down to pick up the flower gently, and you noticed all the thorns had been taken off. Koo must’ve removed them so that you didn’t accidentally hurt yourself. 

You felt warmth flood you, drowning the butterflies in your stomach and replacing them with something much less fleeting, much less shallow. 

It sunk into your bones, into your heart, into your breath as you sighed, squeezing your long-lost Mr Snuggles close to your face. He carried the familiar scent of nostalgia, but also something different, something sharper. You realised with a jolt that you were smelling Koo’s cologne. 

You went back to bed, nuzzled your face into the plushy’s furry belly, and dreamed of fluffy brown hair and bunny smiles. 

Though with Mr Snuggles’ help you were able to sleep wonderfully, you were only able to do so for four hours before your alarm jolted you back into early reality. Honestly, you were sorely tempted to just ditch class, but it was Photography, and if you missed your regular dose of the cute boy in the front row then you thought you might just crumble into dust. 

You dragged yourself out of bed, pulling on your softest oversized hoodie — a gift from Koo which, now that you thought about it, smelled like the same cologne that Mr Snuggles did. You flushed at the thought of him giving you one of his hoodies to wear, though you couldn’t say exactly why that image charmed you. 

You stumbled into the lecture, arms full of textbooks because you knew you wouldn’t have the energy to return back to your apartment to retrieve the relevant materials for your next class later in the day. Your excellent plan was to crash in the library directly after this, have a two hour power-nap, and then make yourself get up in time for Calculus. 

You barely had the energy to listen to the professor droning on and on about… the perfect lense, or whatever. You allowed yourself the indulgence of tuning out, resting your chin on your palm and gazing dreamily at the boy in the front row. He was taking notes, as per usual. What a good student! You praised him in your head. I bet he has the best handwriting. 

Despite your best efforts, you fell asleep within ten minutes. You were woken as the class concluded by the clamour of students grabbing their materials and the scrape of chairs as your classmates stood up, leaving you behind — the only one half-splayed across the desk in front of you. 

You jerked upright, grabbing your stuff in one hand as you tried to tug on your bag, eventually succeeding with much struggle, only to drop it all again as soon as you stood up. You whimpered, watching helplessly as your textbooks fanned across the floor. You saw one of them split along the spine as it landed on an open page. 

That cost me two hundred dollars, you thought absently, and I just chucked it down like a bouncy ball.  

Suddenly, you glimpsed someone crouching down and gathering them all up into a sturdy pile. As he stood up, your vision was full of fluffy brown hair, errant strands falling into star-filled doe eyes. 

Oh. Oh no. 

“H-Here you are,” He murmured, passing you the pile gently, making sure you were able to take the weight before leaving them in your arms. When he leaned close to you, you breathed in a scent that was oddly familiar, and yet new at the same time. As his hands receded, his skin brushed against yours for a second and you swear your vision blanked out. 

“Thanks,” You whispered, your gaze so firmly focused on the floor that you didn’t notice his flushed cheeks. 

As soon as you got to the library, you whipped out your phone, all tiredness banished from your system by that momentous experience. You had talked to him. 

To: koo ✨

[8:47 AM]

koo i think im in love

From: koo ✨

[8:47 AM]

what

with who

To: koo ✨

[8:47 AM]

this boy in my photography class 

he’s just so- 

[8:48 AM]

i can’t even explain it

i dropped my textbooks and he picked them up for me and i stg i almost cried

From: koo ✨

[8:48 AM]

wait

seriously??

To: koo ✨

[8:49 AM]

yeah i cry at like the drop of a hat 

From: koo ✨

[8:49 AM]

no-

cute 

but i mean

that’s who you’re in love with?

To: koo ✨

[8:49 AM]

yeah?

From: koo ✨

[8:49 AM]

gray sweater

[8:50 AM]

big eyes

tall-ish

that’s him???

To: koo ✨

[8:50 AM]

OMG YOU’RE IN MY PHOTOGRAPHY CLASS AREN’T YOU

From: koo ✨

[8:50 AM]

WHAT

NO

IM NOT

To: koo ✨

[8:50 AM]

OMGGGGGGG

YOU SAW HIM HELP ME SO YOU MUST BE IN MY CLASSSS

[8:51]

okay!

are you the frat guy who always comes in hungover???

no judgement

From: koo ✨

[8:51 AM]

NO

To: koo ✨

[8:52 AM]

are you the guy who only ever wears knitwear???

From: koo ✨

[8:52 AM]

NO

To: koo ✨

[8:53 AM]

…are you the professor?

From: koo ✨

[8:53 AM]

NO!!!!!

oh my god lets just meet up or something before i explode

To: koo ✨

[8:53 AM]

WAIT

ARE YOU SERIOUS????

From: koo ✨

[8:54 AM]

…you’re that excited to meet me?

To: koo ✨

[8:54 AM]

OF COURSE I AM

OH MY GODDDD

WHEN?

From: koo ✨

[8:54 AM]

now?

i can meet you at the campus coffee shop in like five minutes?

To: koo ✨

[8:55 AM]

five minutes???

that’s not enough time koo i have to go home and pick out something pretty to wear !!

From: koo ✨

[8:55 AM]

it doesn’t matter what you wear, you’re always beautiful to me

To: koo ✨

[8:56 AM]

you

you think im

b-beautiful 

: ’ ))))))))))

From: koo ✨

[8:57 AM]

…

haha see you there!! 

To: koo ✨

[8:57 AM]

GET BACK HERE WE HAVE TO TALK ABOUT THIS-

You sat on an empty table, fiddling with the tea bag tag which hung over the side of your mug. You had bought Green Tea as an effort to calm yourself down so you weren’t too anxious to meet Koo, but it hadn’t worked because you were impatient and sipped it too soon so now you were sat there nursing a burnt tongue like an idiot. 

You knew it was irrational to be self-conscious. He already knew who you were, and seemed to like you, it was just you that was in the dark. You went over the possible people Koo could be, mentally cycling through the boys in your photography class. It was an annoyingly large class, which meant he would be anyone from the guy who smelled like Funyuns to-

Fluffy-haired boy strolled into the coffee shop and you let out an involuntary sigh. He seemed to be cheerful, a smile exposing his bunny teeth and making his cheeks bunch up adorably, with like,  five different sets of dimples poked into them. You had never agreed more with the saying that dimples were caused by an angel’s kiss. 

Well, at least I’ll have something nice to look at while I wait, you thought, just before all your thoughts suddenly tipped out of your head when you realised he was walking towards your table. 

“Is this seat taken?” He grinned, before sliding into the seat across from you. 

You whimpered, and his smile grew devastatingly wider.

“Hi,” He breathed, before his gaze flickered down to your mug of tea, clutched so tightly in your hands that you worried the ceramic might shatter. “You didn’t get hot chocolate? I thought you had a sweet tooth?”

“Uhm-” You choked, before forcing yourself to get a grip. How would Koo feel if he walked in here and saw you sitting with another guy? “I’m actually- I’m waiting for someone. Sorry.”

If it was possible — and it certainly seemed to be — the boy’s grin broadened even more, his eyes crinkling into adorable half-moons.

“Is that so? Is he your boyfriend?”

“No!” You blurted, before flushing profusely. The boy across from you seemed to be thoroughly enjoying the display. “I mean- uhm, I don’t know. Maybe? This is our- this is our first actual meeting.”

“Oh?” The boy tilted his head, “Really? How exciting.”

You hummed in agreement, eyes fixed on your slowly cooling beverage. You raised it to your mouth to take a hesitant sip and- nope,  still too hot. You whined quietly, rubbing your sore tongue against the inside of your cheek to try and soothe it. 

“Oh, sweets,” The boy murmured across from you, and you were too distracted to notice the nickname. He plucked the mug out of your hands and placed it on the other side of the table, as if he was trying to make sure it couldn’t hurt you anymore. “Are you okay? Do you want me to take you to the campus infirmary?”

“Wha- no, it’s okay,” You mumbled, lisping slightly on your burnt tongue and blushing when he cooed over you, “It’s- I’m waiting here for someone, and- I mean, I don’t even know your name-”

“It’s Jungkook,” He interrupted cheekily, deliberately ignoring the rest of your statement, “Some people call me Kookie, and really special people call me… Koo.” 

Oh. Oh.

Fuck.

“Really special people?” You asked, your voice small, and not because of the burn. 

“Well, people…” Jungkook- Koo paraphrased, tilting his head slightly, “I guess it would be more accurate to say… one really special person.”

“Really?” You breathed, and Jungkook leaned over the table, close enough that you could smell his cologne, the same scent embedded in the fabric of your hoodie- his hoodie. 

“The most special person.” He murmured, the fervent emotion packed in each word speaking louder than any increase of volume could.

You had never been anyone’s most special person before, but, as you looked into Jungkook’s chocolate eyes, you started to believe you could almost taste it, sticky sweet on your lips. And when Jungkook eventually, finally coaxed your lips in a gentle kiss, you let him in, and found out that happiness tastes reassuringly honey-sweet. 

[maziekeen]

maziekeen’s coloring tutorial (part 1, base)

part 2 for dark scenes here

before anything, here are some helpful resources for what i’m about to do cause i think you need to test everything to see what will work for you and will learn so damn much in the process:

how to use curves: curves tutorial by completeresources. and gif tutorial by barrysberkman. curves is the best and it’s what i use to “fix” the coloring before proceeding with the coloring

how to color yellow-ish/terrible scenes: coloring tutorial by jungshoseok. i’m always going back to this tutorial when i’m stuck with my coloring or need a reminder of a different way to color difficult scenes, and again, sami uses curves!

and there is more on my resources tag here

downloads/settings

download the psds

save for web settings

sharpen settings

text settings

crop sizes (new dimensions)

my ko-fi ♥

the tutorial, finally lol

tv show high fidelity. this gonna be simple scene before going to the annoying dark/yellow/green/blue scenes on the second part of the tutorial.

this is important: i don’t always get right the first time like i’m showing this tutorial. i do all this process and then go back to the layers and adjust a few to get what i want

before:

after:

1) curves. first i brighten the gif just a little with RGB so i can see how to color correct, and to do that i use the red, green, and blue there. instead of using them up, i decrease their values, trying to leave as natural/red/magenta as possible, sometimes i increase, like i did with blue, but it’s really just a bit

okay, what do i do? i decrease the color that’s bothering me. when you increase the RGB, the color that stand out is what you will use the others to fix. like this one, the gif got too yellow, so i decrease red. then it was too green, so that’s the next one to change. i get this “controlled” yellow, it’s good but i want more red-ish/magenta tone so i can work with the colors only later, so i increase the blue just a bit for that. then you get the result

i always try to "take off” the colors here so i have more control of them in the future and edit the way i want

result:

2) levels. i use for both darken and brighten, nothing too extreme

the white arrow to brighten, it depends on the gif, but since i'll use exposure to that later, i only use around 200 to 250

the gray one to darken, if you increase this one too much then you’ll be whitewashing the shit out of the gif, i only use this way or don’t use at all. exception if it’s a really dark gif

the dark one is to darken too, i use only around 0 to 10

result:

3) exposure. this one is the one i use to brighten, here the different is minimal, but in a dark gif this works really well as you’ll see on part 2. also, i know it looks like the levels was for nothing here, but most of the time you go back to previous layers and edit a bit more. or even after use exposure and need to darken, levels is there for it

exposure. i never use more than 1,00. and sometimes only +50 is enough in a dark gif

offset. nope, never, no

gamma correction. also, never use more than 1,10. sometimes 1,05 is more than enough

result: 

4) gradient map. i wasn’t a fan, but now that i see the difference i’m always using it. i like that controls the dark parts of the gif, i could use more levels for that, but it would get weird

always soft light, and the fill i only use around 20%. sometimes my standard is 15%. i got this from sami’s tutorial and it’s amazing even tho it doesn’t look like much here

result: 

5) color balance. i’m still in that thought of “taking off” the colors, because after this layer that i’ll edit them.but also here i fix the color if the gif is practically ready. i only used midtones, but sometimes i use highlights to make the gif as natural as possible. it doesn’t look like it changed much here, but you’ll probably get back here after finishing the psd to fix a thing or two

result:

6) selective color. the fun part! honestly, just mess around the colors. i can’t really say do this or that here because i change this a lot depending on the gif, so here are some tips:

reds and yellows. i use to fix whitewashing, make the person more vivid too, you know? usually i’ve been using magenta with yellow together, you have more control if the red will stay red or it will be pink-sh, and if the yellow will stay yellow or be around green

cyans and blues. if you come across a gif where the white is blue, you adjust this on cyans. decrease the cyan and mess around magenta and yellow

magentas and whites. sometimes the gif seems too red-ish, or something, so you decrease magenta and it will make a LOT of difference. the whites it’s helpful too when the white on the gif have another annoying color, you adjust here just like the cyans

neutrals and blacks. nothing hardcore, sometimes i don’t even use neutrals. and i used to use blacks on 10 and it’s just the worst on most of the gifs, so now i use top 5, depending on the gif

result: 

7) vibrance. i don’t overdo because it will ruin everything i edited previously, like, if add more vibrance the yellow would go crazy along with the background and ugh, this way is so clean and exactly what i want. so, i never use more than 50, some scenes are really with no color, so i use more

final result:

other examples using the same process are in the post previews since tumblr won’t let me add more gifs here ;)

PART 2 OF THE TUTORIAL HERE

there i’ll color dark/yellow-ish/blue scenes <3

[unfortunate17]

Oh, so much delicious angst... If you're up to it, 4 or 23 from the promt list for obikin. Thanks in advance.

I’m stupid because I didn’t know which prompt list you meant, did both, and then realized you most definitely meant the dialogue one LOL. 

So here is 23 from HERE (“I would’ve died for you.”) and 23 Angst from HERE (“When did you stop loving me?”) combined! 

Happy New Year! 

I re-wrote this like 6 times before I gave up, hopefully it’s still reasonably enjoyable to read 😩 

Anakin brings him home from a sub-surface level bar six weeks after Obi-Wan returns from Naboo. Obi-Wan has already had a few too many drinks, wallowing in his misery. Even the bartender-bot had started to look at him with pity.

It’s more than he can say for Anakin.

Anakin simply pulls him into a speeder without so much as a glance, deposits him into his refresher, and shoves him into bed once he’s sure Obi-Wan’s not going to retch or hurt himself. There’s a calculated coldness to his actions, all of Anakin’s usual playfulness has all but vanished. Much like his possessions from their quarters.

He still remembers that morning clearly. He’d leaned over to drop a hasty kiss on Anakin’s cheek, already late for his morning meeting, when Anakin had bristled uncomfortably. Obi-Wan had looked at him with an unspoken question spelled out on his tongue, but Anakin had only shrugged, mumbled something about how weird it was seeing Obi-Wan without his usual facial hair.

By the time he’d returned, Anakin had been gone. His tools and droid parts and clothes nowhere to be found. Ahsoka hadn’t been able to look him in the eyes when Obi-Wan had asked her about him.

Now, for a moment, the two of them regard each other. Anakin looks tired, the area under his eyes smeared dark, skin pallid like he hadn’t been sleeping. The sight sends a pang through Obi-Wan and without thought, he reaches out to draw Anakin close.

Anakin flinches away immediately. “I’ve brought you home like Master Windu asked,” he says stiffly, “I’ll be going now.”

Obi-Wan watches him shuffle, ice spreading steadily in his veins. The anger, he had been expecting, but never this stony silence. Truthfully, he’d take anything, any outburst, if it only meant Anakin would look at him again with something other than steely blankness.

He reaches out to catch one of Anakin’s hands. If Obi-Wan had been sober, he’d have probably lost his nerve by now, but alcohol has always made him far braver than he should be. He drags Anakin down until he’s kneeling between the V of his knees and presses a hand against the sharp cut of his jaw. They’re eye-level now, even if Anakin isn’t looking at him.

“Come by for breakfast tomorrow, my dear,” he murmurs gently. “I’ll make flatckaes.”

“I’m a better cook than you.”

“Perhaps after then,” Obi-Wan swallows. “I’ve missed spending time with you. We can do whatever you’d like,” he attempts a cracked smile, “I won’t even make you meditate.”

Anakin doesn’t raise his eyes from where he’s fixed them on the floor, but Obi-Wan feels his jaw work tightly under his fingers. “I’m training with Ahsoka tomorrow morning.”

“At night then,” Obi-Wan tries, biting back an unexpected sob, “maybe we could – catch a holodrama?”

“I can’t. I promised Padmé I’d see her.”

“Afterwards?”

Anakin lets out a long rush of air. “Obi-Wan – ”

The tone makes Obi-Wan flinch. He looks at Anakin, slides his hand upwards, past the smooth skin of his cheekbones, and up into his lovely tangle of golden hair. He tries to memories the curve of Anakin’s mouth, the furrow of his brow. Thinks of the way Anakin’s eyes used to light up at the very sight of him.

“The day after then,” Obi-Wan whispers. He leans in to kiss him, the motion nearly unconscious, but Anakin startles backwards once more.

Obi-Wan isn’t proud of the sound that escapes him. It’s a broken thing, punched out of his sternum, almost a whimper. He tightens his hold on Anakin when he tries to stand. “Anakin, please,” he begs. The whiskey makes his tongue thick, the words difficult to shape in his mouth.

Anakin allows his grip, sits back down. He squeezes his eyes shut, pained, and Obi-Wan’s heart hammers at the thought of causing it.

It was really only a few weeks ago that they were pressed together in this very bed, Anakin laughing into his neck, rubbing cold feet into his shins. The notion is unthinkable somehow, makes Obi-Wan ache.

Now, there is only silence.

Obi-Wan clears his throat, and the sound is loud, a cacophony in a moment in which even the force dares not to breathe. He’s not pleased with the words that fall out of him next, but Obi-Wan can’t quite hold them back.

“When did you stop loving me?” he asks, then immediately regrets it. Obi-Wan doesn’t want an answer, not truly.

At this, Anakin’s gaze snaps back up to him. He looks even more tired now, face drawn. But his eyes still widen in what Obi-Wan thinks is shock. Or maybe surprise.

Obi-Wan waits, but Anakin doesn’t speak, providing no justification or answers. He simply sits back on his haunches and looks miserable, put-out. His shoulders are bent under a weight that he should never have to carry. Obi-Wan grits his teeth against the knowledge that he’s somehow added to it.

Finally, Anakin sighs. “I should go.”

Obi-Wan settles his free hand over Anakin’s cheek, brushes a thumb over a lovely cheekbone. “Please don’t.”

Anakin allows the motion, but his brows furrow in what Obi-Wan knows is anger. “Why not?” he snaps. And finally, finally, there’s anger. A dark corner of Obi-Wan’s mind relishes having Anakin’s attention again. “I thought you were dead. I mourned you, Obi-Wan. You knew how I felt about you and you used it against me to sell your act. I would’ve done anything for you, Master. I would’ve died for you and you didn’t even care.”

“It was a poor decision,” Obi-Wan admits miserably. “I cannot tell you how much I regret it.”

“You’re only sorry because I’m upset,” Anakin snarls in response, “because I’m no longer in your bed. You came back and tried to pretend like nothing was wrong. Like what you did didn’t even matter.”

The sheer depths of his failures are difficult to consider for too long. Obi-Wan’s throat hurts. The force reveals nothing, empty and cold as it is, his connection whiskey-dulled.

And really, Anakin is right.

What does Obi-Wan’s apology even mean? Obi-Wan, who has always kept his emotions close to his chest, guarded, even when Anakin had expressed his desire for more, asked for something as simply given as verbal reassurance. He’d spent so long working through his own feelings, his own struggles, that Obi-Wan has never stopped to think that perhaps one day, Anakin might no longer be interested in waiting.

“That’s not true Anakin,” he insists, bringing Anakin close. “I never wanted to hurt you.”

Anakin resists. Obi-Wan watches him, desperation rising with every breath. He thinks of never really seeing Anakin again, of being alone in these wretched quarters. Thinks of watching Anakin with another, someone far more worthy, who would never dream of betraying or hurting him.

Even more horrifyingly, Obi-Wan thinks of someone in his own place. Of someone basking in the warmth of Anakin’s love, his fierce loyalty, enjoying the gentleness of his hands, the curve of his spine in bed.

Obi-Wan is going to be sick.

Tears glob in his throat, splinter at the corner of his eyes. The burn of alcohol in his veins is waning now, a chill settling in his bones. “Will you ever love me again?” he asks at last.

The ensuing silence is enough to make Obi-Wan’s vision go blurry with tears.

Anakin’s posture doesn’t soften, but emotion ripples across his face. Obi-Wan watches the line of his throat as he swallows, a muscle jumping in his jaw. “Obi-Wan,” his voice is tight, “gods, please don’t cry.”

“I’m sorry,” Obi-Wan offers again. He forces himself to let go of Anakin then, even if he can’t help but trace his shoulders one last time. Obi-Wan rakes his eyes over Anakin’s face, the softness of his features, the brightness of his eyes. “I love you,” he presses a fist to his mouth, trembling, “You will always be the single most important – “

“Stop,” Anakin says. His mouth twists unhappily and he leans forward, tucking his forehead into Obi-Wan’s chest. His voice is muffled now. “Please. I can’t bear to see you like this, Master.”

Obi-Wan heaves in response, shivering. He cups the back of Anakin’s head, rubs at the nape of his neck gently. Tries to pour what he can never express into what remains of their bond.

Anakin shakes his head once, the motion decisive, before he leans back and maneuvers Obi-Wan into bed. The world spins for a moment as Obi-Wan’s head settles into the pillow. He wants to say more, but he’s not sure if he has any words of value left.

But then Anakin is climbing into bed beside him, folding around him. He thumbs clumsily at the wetness on Obi-Wans cheeks even as Obi-Wan clings to him like he might vanish at any moment.

“I was angry,” Anakin admits quietly, words trembling on a shaky breath. He rubs Obi-Wan’s back, tucks his face into his neck. “But I didn’t want to hurt you like this. I’m sorry.”

“You have nothing to apologize for, my love.”

“No,” Anakin holds him tighter. He kisses Obi-Wan’s head. “You’ve always taught me not to seek revenge. What I’ve done is – this isn’t what I wanted.”

“Anakin – ”

Anakin shushes him, pulling the blanket up around the both of them. His chest trembles. “Sleep, Master. We’ll talk more about this in the morning.”

Obi-Wan curls an arm around him, tries to calm his racing heart. “You’ll stay?”

“Always.”

[judenightfell]

How do you do your artwork? I want to get into graphic design and I love your style

hi, love! first, thank you so much here’s an example of the graphic designing I’ve done for 7 years)

Illustrations are just drawings, and to get even more specific, there’s regular drawing and then there’s digital drawing, and I currently do everything digital (i could not draw well on a piece of paper to save my life, no clue why)

SO! here’s my process! and keep in mind that this might not be what works for you, or only one or two things will stick, but I think it’s great to give everything a try and see what you like!

NOTE: I use a Wacom Intuos Tablet (small) with the Wacom pen. The program I use is Photoshop CC 2019.

1) Find References        Do NOT be afraid or ashamed to use reference photos as you’re starting. I have a pintrest board that I save any and all photos that I will want to use as references for my drawings        For example, THIS photo is a reference I used for my Jemma sketch, and funny enough, Cassandra Jean also used this photo for reference in THIS illustration she did that I saw two days after I finished and posted my sketch. So if someone as talented as CJ can use reference photos, you can to!

2) Sketch       So now that I have my reference photo(s) I start to sketch. And sometimes you’ll have to sketch over your original sketch to make a hand look normal, or fix an eye, but you can keep working at a sketch until you’re happy!        Don’t be afraid to even sketch on top of your reference photos! If you’re just starting out, and have no clue why you can’t get this one damn foot to look right, just sketch it over the reference! It helps you learn how things are shaped, how to draw certain curves, etc, and eventually you’ll understand and have a natural eye for sketching a body!      And don’t think your sketch has to look absolutely polished! A sketch is meant to be rough, it’s just an outline of the basic shapes you need. Think of it like an book: the outline of the plot is the sketch, and the actual writing is the inking...which brings me to...

3) Inking     When you’re finally happy with your sketch, you can start to ink your lines. “inking” just refers to actually putting down concrete lines in your drawing. This is where you decide if you want that shoulder to be a little higher or a little lower.       How I ink my drawings: set my sketch layer to 30% opacity, set my brush size to 15 or 20, set Smoothing to 100. Next to Smoothing, there’s a little gear icon, and I select “Stroke Catch-Up” -- this means that when I start to draw my lines, the actual lines are delayed on screen. This helps A LOT to get those perfect lines in one swipe (of course, you might to do it 20 times before you get it perfect, but that just comes with the territory) and means you won’t have those weird sections you might get if you were drawing, picking up your pen, and going back in to finish the line. (I hope that made sense, here’s a Youtube video I watched when I was starting out that helps explain this concept!)     When you’re inking, you might have lines that intersect at corners, but I just erase those when I’m done with the entire inking process, instead of while I’m doing it!      ALSO, you do not have to ink every single line in your sketch (I’ll mention this later!) just the important/main ones!

4) Colouring      THE FUN PART! I move my sketch and inking layers on top of my layers that I will be using for colouring, so that when I colour, the inked lines cover  the edges of the colours (does that make sense???) ANYWAY       My style currently is what I call “block colouring.” it means that there really is not shading or “traditional” tonal values or realistic shadows to objects. It’s pretty “flat” except for basic shadows to give some dimension.         I start with the base of the skin tone, then base of the hair, the clothes/jewelry, etc. just put the colour down (and runes I just fill in Black). make sure it nice and tight, and the skin colour doesn’t run into the hair or clothes, ya know?  Then I go in with a colour just a bit darker than each of the colours in the drawing already. If you’re drawing a white person, shade the skin with a slightly darker pink/peach colour, if it’s a POC, choose shades darker than their tone. This goes for hair, eyes, clothes etc!          You might have to look back at your reference photos to know where the shadows are on your person!         I shade using my brush set on 100% smoothing, so that the edges are straight as well!

5) Sketching...Again      When i’ve finished with colouring, I reapply my sketch layer at full opacity on top of my colouring WITH my inking. you remember how I said you don’t have to ink every single line, just the main ones? Well that’s because you can go back with your sketch layer, erase the sketching of those main lines, so you have the sketching of the smaller lines left!         And what I mean by smaller lines is like the sketching on the folds in fabric, or lines in the throat that detail the Adam’s apple. It gives my drawings just a hint of the “rough” style of sketching that I really like! 

That’s pretty much my process! I’m sorry if some things didn’t make sense (it’s my first time trying to explain these things) so if you need clarification, don’t hesitate to ask! 

wow this was long!

[gaaradreamer]

Power Rangers Movie Positive Rant (mostly)

WARNING! MAJOR SPOILERS AND GUSHING! ALSO SOME CRITICISM! Okay for those of you who haven't seen it I'd suggest it. It's worth it as long as you expect what it which surprisingly most people don't seem to understand. It was a reboot. That means it's going to have just as corny silly stuff as the original but it's 2017 and it's time to add some depth. And MAN did it add depth! But I went to the movie expecting that kind of reboot. There are some problems and I'm going to post some spoilers. I know sometimes I need to know what's going to happen to give a movie a chance. So if you're like me about that or maybe just this movie here you go, problems you should be aware of: 1. The white guy leads. There are 5 characters with different genders and colors of skin but the 1 white guy becomes the leader. The only reason this isn't a deal breaker is because of what they do with the rest. I'll put that later though. 2. For all the proper diversity there really is only one black person. I'm not even sure there were extras. I would count his mom but we litterally only see a blip of her. 3. The tones are a struggle if you don't get the reason but basically suits are on it gets silly (but also cool! Especially if you loved the show!) suits are off and it gets serious. 4. Product placement. Completely shameless product placement. I used to work for Krispy Kreme and considering how low tech old fashioned a business they were and especially considering our usual customers were almost always over 50, I actually think it was a smart choice. And I'm impressed by not only the choice but how they made their selves so integral to the actual plot. But it is blatant annoying and distracting. I just understand why they did it. 5. Good writing but bad writing. OK everyone has an origin. Everyone is well explained. Everyone reacts to their origin realistically. Every origin is not only beautiful it actually made some skeptical viewers cry. BUT we don't exactly get to see these way more emotionally interesting stories. We see them keep secrets then reveal it later and we see again realistic reactions but we get seconds of them actually going through it. 6. If you're a hard core fan and you're just here for the suits I'd suggest sending in a friend who can come get you when they FINALLY get them on because almost the whole movie is about them learning how to get the damn things on. I wouldn't have minded but it did piss me off when there were plenty of opportunities. They have to be connected and care about each other or no suits. K fine but they show many instances of caring about each other where they should have put the suits on, but didn't. And you can't tell me it's because they weren't trying because one of them did it on accident first. Because he cared about the entire team. If that's the rules then they should have put the suits on right after the campfire scene! Alright those are the only real problems. Here are the reasons you should go see it anyway: 1. Damn with the shock value! These guys know how to make the "dead always come back and main characters never die" thing actually shocking! Even though you know they can't kill that guy off or the world's not really going to end somewhere in the back of your head, this movie knows how to make you doubt it. They ACTUALLY make you worry about the world and the good guys! 2. Damn the depth! I mean I know we said we don't get to see it but what we know and do see means this movie isn't afraid to hit everything​ it can. Not all the rangers are perfect people who are just misunderstood. These are teenagers who act like teenagers. They do stupid stuff. They lash out. They have attitude and good reason for it. They have moments of doubt. There is more to Rita than in the show (don't get too excited she's brushed over too). She's the villian if you haven't seen the show. There's more to Zordon.(sp?) He's the guide​ and if you haven't seen the show and you don't know what that means it means he's the Dumbledore or professor X of the story although he's not great at it because of his own depth. There's just so many emotional story points and there really is a good story here. 3. Damn the excellent diversity! This needs to be here as a general but I'm going to address each one because they all really deserve their own reasons. They were handled perfectly! I addressed the ONLY representation problems but imo they mad up with just how many problems people usually have with deversity in movies or TV they completely obliterate. I gaurentee you will feel represented and as an actual person if you are black, gay or have a mental disorder. The usual things you see just aren't there with sadly the exception of the 1st 2 things I mentioned. But dude you don't understand. 4. The black guy is THE MOST IMPORTANT CHARACTER! And is BLATANT my friend. He has the best lines, the most lines and is genuinely the best person in the group. He's really the only one who always has pure unselfish intentions and he is the most accepting person. He basically is the plot all by himself. He is the 1st to get his suit. He finds out where the important thing is, BIGGEST MAJOR SPOILER! LOOK FOR "END SPOILER" IF YOU DON'T WANT TO SEE!!! He's the one who dies but he doesn't stay dead so no not that trope either. END SPOILER. He is responsible for uniting them as a team oh! And did I mention he is a genious and if he doesn't have the most screen time he steals the show so much it feels like it. If there's anyone you're not going to forget it's him. 5. Ok this is the same character but Damn! Double whammy representation. This guy is also AUTISTIC! Don't get me wrong I don't know anyone who is autistic but I was almost diagnosed with autism as both my parents thought I might be and some doctors wondered but some basic questions proved that no I was just extremely ADD which is thought to be on the same scale and if that's true I definitely found myself relating to the guy. I THINK it was correct but I honestly don't know. Here's what I DO know they got right. It wasn't a joke. It wasn't "oh look this guys wrong in the head and it's funny just because of that" It also wasn't pure sympathy or a crutch that makes you feel like life is impossible. It wasn't "oh poor little autistic kid can't make friends or take care of himself or have a normal life" Yes he had some comic relief loosely based on his condition but mostly he was just funny. His condition was a TRAIT AND NOT A PERSONALITY! And that just made it amazing to watch! 6. The lesbian with no girlfriend. I have to say it most of the time of a lesbian is involved it means they can never be single and it's all about the sex or making out. It's pandering which I actually is a good thing but to the wrong people. This movie doesn't pretend being a lesbian means you're some sex driven goddess. You're not guaranteed to flirt with every girl. You're not guaranteed a girlfriend. You don't have a giant obvious sign saying "hey girls just so you know I'm lesbian if you're looking for one and guys back off!" And you don't necessarily have or ever get the courage to tell your over conforming family. and even if they probably wouldn't approve that doesn't mean they're awful or abusive they just aren't likely to understand. We see her parents and her mom definitely needs to take a chill pill but otherwise it's a normal kind family. 7. The other 2 aren't white and there's barely a comment on their diversity. There's literally one line and if you blink you'll miss it. They don't toot their own horn or talk about the importance or problems of diversity and honesty if you're not looking you won't notice. It's a story not a political move. 8. Alpha 5 kicks ass! He doesn't change much from the source material but I remember the 1 thing that bothered me about him was how pathetic he was. He was like the scare damsel in the show. He'd get scared and the rangers get defensive. Nope! The 1st thing he does is drag one of them like a ragdoll. They try to fight him and they get their collective asses kicked! I would actually love to see him fight Rita it might be a fairer fight than you 1st think. 9. Fanservice! Yes they do the group walk. Yes they fight the minions. Yes they get the zords (sp?). Yes they make a giant robot to fight a giant monster and yes the stake are high but it's still silly and it's still action packed 10. Learning curve. Weird new thing they don't automatically know what they're doing! 11. The playoff at the end. The knowing smiles when they listen to their families gush over all of the power rangers and know each color. 12. Nothing is magically better. The sick are still sick. The judgemental remain that way. And the hurt aren't magically forgiving. But everyone is on a "that was unbelievable and awesome" high.

[lins-fandom-hub]

weird asks thing

from this post

okay here we go

1. coffee mugs, teacups, wine glasses, water bottles, or soda cans?

Tea cups and coffee mugs! Not that I’m a firm collector. I just happen to have them is all.

2. chocolate bars or lollipops?

Chocolate bars.

3. bubblegum or cotton candy?

Cotton Candy!!

4. how did your elementary school teachers describe you?

Hyper, not very cooperative, loud

5. do you prefer to drink soda from soda cans, soda bottles, plastic cups or glass cups?

Soda bottles, though I wouldn’t mind glass cups.

6. pastel, boho, tomboy, preppy, goth, grunge, formal or sportswear?

Huh? I...tend to go casual, and the colour scheme doesn’t matter to me much. I’d say tomboy if I have to pick from this list though.

7. earbuds or headphones?

Headphones--if I could find a nice pair.

8. movies or tv shows?

Movies. I don’t know any TV shows.

9. favorite smell in the summer?

Freshly cut grass after mowing the lawn.

10. game you were best at in p.e.?

Don’t even talk to me about P.E. The only thing I remember from it was the stress that dodgeball brought around.

11. what you have for breakfast on an average day?

Eggs, bread, oatmeal. Nothing too fancy. Sometimes I actually make a breakfast sandwich with avocados and cheese, but if said items weren’t in the fridge...

12. name of your favorite playlist?

Windows Down 2k18. Has tracks from many different artists and eras that I actually like to listen to. No classical though, that’s another playlist.

13. lanyard or key ring?

Lanyard. Can’t get enough of them back in university.

14. favorite non-chocolate candy?

Fuzzy Peaches.

15. favorite book you read as a school assignment?

The Magician’s Nephew by C. S. Lewis.

16. most comfortable position to sit in?

Mermaid pose? On the floor, at least.

17. most frequently worn pair of shoes?

A pair of black Adidas shoes my mom recently bought this year for me and my sister. Turns out that my sister wears the white pair more while I wear the black. Not that I mind.

18. ideal weather?

Sunny with no chance of rain.

19. sleeping position?

Mostly on my right side all curled up.

20. preferred place to write (i.e., in a note book, on your laptop, sketchpad, post-it notes, etc.)?

Depends on my mood. Sometimes my computer for fanfic novels. Sometimes my notebook if I have secrets to spill.

21. obsession from childhood?

Does Disney count?

22. role model?

Idina Menzel.

23. strange habits?

Talking to myself (a lot), singing at my desk (or humming), twirling my pencil too much. 

24. favorite crystal?

White Calcite.

25. first song you remember hearing?

Ummm...the wheels on the bus? I can’t remember.

26. favorite activity to do in warm weather?

Walk around the park and catch Pokemon (in Pokemon GO).

27. favorite activity to do in cold weather?

Go ice skating!

28. five songs to describe you?

“Speechless” - Naomi Scott

“Blown Away” - Carrie Underwood

“I Dare You” - Bea Miller

“Bless Myself” - Lucy Hale

“Can’t Be Tamed” - Miley Cyrus

29. best way to bond with you?

Walk through the park with me. Or talk about stuff with me. Anything, really, so long as it doesn’t bore either of us.

30. places that you find sacred?

Any place that holds a tall temple.

31. what outfit do you wear to kick ass and take names?

a pair of denim shorts and a black t-shirt. or if it’s in the winter, a pair of jeans and a comfy hoodie.

32. top five favorite vines?

I don’t watch vines. Welp.

33. most used phrase in your phone?

Welp.

34. advertisements you have stuck in your head?

For a while it was this Liberty ad I remember watching while I was in the States, but that’s pretty much it...

35. average time you fall asleep?

On school nights, 12 am or so, maybe 2 am at latest. Right now, about 10 pm or so.

36. what is the first meme you remember ever seeing?

anything involving grumpy cat.

37. suitcase or duffel bag?

Suitcase! Makes things feel more official. 

38. lemonade or tea?

Lemonade.

39. lemon cake or lemon meringue pie?

Lemon meringue pie!

40. weirdest thing to ever happen at your school?

At least once a term it’s turned into the biggest Humans vs Zombies war zone ever.

41. last person you texted?

my mom

42. jacket pockets or pants pockets?

jacket pockets!

43. hoodie, leather jacket, cardigan, jean jacket or bomber jacket?

Hoodies!

44. favorite scent for soap?

Anything floral works.

45. which genre: sci-fi, fantasy or superhero?

Fantasy.

46. most comfortable outfit to sleep in?

my pyjamas!

47. favorite type of cheese?

Havarti. But that’s because I eat it so often.

48. if you were a fruit, what kind would you be?

Probably a grape. Or a bunch of grapes.

49. what saying or quote do you live by?

“When you reach the end of your rope, tie a knot in it and hang on.” ~Thomas Jefferson

50. what made you laugh the hardest you ever have?

Any GIF from Hamilton the Musical.

51. current stresses?

Job searching and updating stories on Wattpad.

52. favorite font?

Comic Sans--NOPE. Tahoma or Verdana, I guess.

53. what is the current state of your hands?

Fairy smooth, I guess? Though the nails are misshapen due to my horrendous attempts at cutting them, and my pinkies are curved due to genetics passed down from generations past. Whee.

54. what did you learn from your first job?

I learned that not everyone will treat you with the same respect, and that you have to look past that flaw to give them a chance.

55. favorite fairy tale?

The Goose Girl.

56. favorite tradition?

Anything Chinese New Year related.

57. the three biggest struggles you’ve overcome?

Depression in the wake of my grandfather’s death; lack of confidence after my parents’ condemning; lack of concentration following a head injury

58. four talents you’re proud of having?

Playing the piano, playing the violin, singing on pitch, and opening bottles with lids screwed on too tightly.

59. if you were a video game character, what would your catchphrase be?

“Don’t even try to mess with me.”

60. if you were a character in an anime, what kind of anime would you want it to be?

I don’t even know the first thing about Anime, so I don’t even know how to answer this.

61. favorite line you heard from a book/movie/tv show/etc.?

“That’s my girlfriend, you numpties!” ~Ron Weasley

62. seven characters you relate to?

Anna - Frozen

Rapunzel - Tangled

Katniss - The Hunger Games

Tris - Divergent

Rowan - HPHM

[insert 2 other characters here]

63. five songs that would play in your club?

“Turn Down for What” - DJ Snake ft Lil John

“High Hopes” - Panic! At the Disco

“Dance, Dance” - Fall Out Boy

“Victorious” - P!ATD

“Kill This Love” - BLACKPINK

64. favorite website from your childhood?

Webkinz.com or Poptropica.com

65. any permanent scars?

One on my right knee from an unfortunate slip on ice in the winter four years ago.

66. favorite flower(s)?

Daisies, lilies, or tulips.

67. good luck charms?

depends on whatever holds more sentimental value. For now, it’s a little Niffler that I crocheted off a YouTube tutorial (and its name is Nuggets.)

68. worst flavor of any food or drink you’ve ever tried?

I typically don’t like anything too spicy, but I really hate the taste of mushrooms. Not the Asian ones--Baby Bellas, specifically. Just...no.

69. a fun fact that you don’t know how you learned?

Currently not applicable.

70. left or right handed?

Right handed.

71. least favorite pattern?

Huh?

72. worst subject?

Gym.

73. favorite weird flavor combo?

I’ll get back to you on that.

74. at what pain level out of ten (1 through 10) do you have to be at before you take an advil or ibuprofen?

7 or 8.

75. when did you lose your first tooth?

I was...five or six? Still fairly young.

76. what’s your favorite potato food (i.e. tater tots, baked potatoes, fries, chips, etc.)?

Anything that’s a mix of fries or tater tots! Those are just--mm.

77. best plant to grow on a windowsill?

I’m not much of a plant-grower but any small plant works fine. 

78. coffee from a gas station or sushi from a grocery store?

Sushi from a grocery store, please.

79. which looks better, your school id photo or your driver’s license photo?

School ID photo.

80. earth tones or jewel tones?

Jewel tones.

81. fireflies or lightning bugs?

Fireflies. What are lightning bugs??

82. pc or console?

Console--and here I wish I still had one!

83. writing or drawing?

Writing. 

84. podcasts or talk radio?

Talk radio.

84. barbie or polly pocket?

Barbie--mostly because I didn’t know Polly Pocket existed until I was like 10 or 11.

85. fairy tales or mythology?

Fairy tales. 

86. cookies or cupcakes?

Cupcakes! Cookies! Can I say both???

87. your greatest fear?

People stabbing me to death with nothing but words of betrayal on their lips.

88. your greatest wish?

Hey, if I told you that, it wouldn’t come true.

89. who would you put before everyone else?

My little sister.

90. luckiest mistake?

Haven’t had any recently.

91. boxes or bags?

Boxes. 

92. lamps, overhead lights, sunlight or fairy lights?

Sunlight!

93. nicknames?

Never had any, though someone in an old English class I used to teach thought it’d be funny to call me Crayola. 

94. favorite season?

Spring!

95. favorite app on your phone?

Pokemon GO for now.

96. desktop background?

A picture I took last summer of a monarch butterfly landing on a pink flower.

97. how many phone numbers do you have memorized?

None? Okay, like, 3, but mostly because they’re really important numbers.

98. favorite historical era?

Music speaking, the Classical era. Otherwise, I don’t know, I haven’t studied that extensively into history.

[astraltraveller]

Learning after November 2016

  There have been 4 instances after November. In those times, I realized a few things. 

PK wanted to date and continued to message for a while and continues to, almost a year later. I’m not sure what he expects of me when I do. I will still be single at that time but I just don’t really get what he wants from this if I really don’t see myself dating him. The interesting thing is that he really did want to date, asap, even knowing that he was a rebound. And still does.

CJ has always been into me and has always made it clear, even when I wasn’t single. The narrative only became more intense after the breakup actually happened. Multiple hangouts, kissing the first time and more the second. Made it clear that if he wasn’t going to HK, that he would date. Someone he could envision spending you know, a long time together. Liking how I argue and knows how to do it. 

AF is someone that I was genuinely into enough when we first started talking. Enough that I started to look forward to seeing him at the gym and liking his invitation for “coffee”. Liking that he was moving things slowly at a gradual pace, not unlike G, who was much too blunt and fast. I liked that he was engaged, and had a different kind of maturity. No weird mocking or tone at that time. I liked that he was interested in what I did and was never over the top. Just all around polite, not cringe, and seemed seasoned. After the drinks, I was interested. The first was at Duke and Devon outside. . Said I left with a cold hug, but to be fair, I wasn’t sure if this was where things were going. the second was also at Mengrai, followed by a walk at the park, the same one with AP. It was fun and we talked about personal things, but somehow I didn’t like being so close to him physically. It started with some leg stroking very lightly. There was some handholding that was oh-so-awkward... clearly I wasn’t into it the way I think he was expecting. We weren’t even holding hands properly. It felt clinical. I was horny but not enough to want to actually engage... would have liked to take it slower, beer or not. Then he went in for the kiss which I admit was exciting and where I had been interested in seeing it go, but not sure if I actually wanted to be the one experiencing it. It was nice. But this guy was clearly all over me and standing over me all strange in public at the park bench. I’m not sure how I felt about it. The walk back to union was the first indication of his fetishes. not sure how I felt about it. Not good. was a bit turned off and confused that he was looking for something too soon. The next times at gym, it was talk of the fondling and what happened, but i didn’t feel sparks the way I had wanted to. There was slight mentioning of “his place” but I wasn’t quite sure about it. The next time we met, it was Gioranna’s with half a bottle of wine, the car fiasco, and as i was in my patch escapade, it was all above the waist downstairs. Then was that fight later that night, which to me, was more than anything an indication of me testing his limits and also preventing whatever what was happening from going too much further. It ended in the car with me saying that this whole situation was nothing like I had been through before. A passed wife, him being 18 years my senior, moving so quickly, a different kind of experience. A bit too much detail on his fetishes. Next was Kalyvia, where things happened. I liked it. I will admit that I was so, so satisifed and couldn’t stop thinking about it, was definitely rare for what it was and with who it was. There were other days of drinks after gym, but already at this point I realized it was just lust for what was fun. I will admit that I was still at least slightly uncertain about my feelings about him. The more time I spent, the more I realized it was purely physical. The emotioanl connection was dwindling fast - it was always talking about what we had done and what we would do next and what he liked, but I was uncomfrotable with PDA, kissing, holding hands in public, etc. I was not dating him. “I’m not in a position to date” is what I have been saying for the past while. That is not true. I am ready to date. Whether it’s getting back with my ex or committing to someone new, I am ready but whatever is next will likely not be my last relationship. I’m a baby. But what I truly meant is “I don’t want to date you, but i want to spare your feelings so I will tell you that I don’t want to date *anyone* because life is not right for it”. But how can that be? 1. If you care enough about someone and you don’t want to lose them to someone else, you will want to date them. 2. I’ve been told this recently and I know what a load of bullshit it is. It’s a cop-out. The more you insist, the less I believe that you are being “honest”. Regardless. After that experience, it got to the point where I would find a lot of our interactions cringey. I hated his mocking, childish chiding tone about “working out together”, “cinderella, call me cin”, and a bunch of other crap I uncovered when I took his offer to stay over at his place for what reason, I don’t know. I regretted the decision more and more as I got through the day. And by the time it was time for dinner and we started talking about sports, I was seriously dreading how much longer it was until it was time to go home. I couldn’t wait for an early morning because I could leave him sooner. It was the first time I felt, this is what it must feel like to be sleeping with someone or spending nights with someone you just absolutely abhor. It’s an awful feeling and one would always choose to be alone if they could. I hate how he argues. He does a terrible, terrible job at it and is way too defensive. Saying things like “I knew that” when I said I don’t like beaches, then saying “actually I didn’t”.... “I knew that” was his first jump to defensiveness when it’s time for him to face something he iddn’t know. and that discussion about the bell curve? not my first time either. and you know what else is cringe? when he goes on and on and on about the finance language. it’s classic, the ones who know the least and like the image of knowing about finance/their specialty (ie. crystal savin) and show it off as an accessory, are the ones who are the most vocal about certain acronyms because they don’t have the internal confidence in their own knowledge. I ihated him dropping those acronyms or, like that night I spent over, me saying “opportunity” or “intrinsic” suddenly meant “opportunity cost” or “intrinsic value”. I absolutely hate it when people have to go out of their way to flaunt some kind of feature and try to hard. If you are smart, it will speak for itself. As will wealth, which will come through in class and in how you carry yourself, not in what you carry or what you say. I absolutely hate every time he does that, and I cannot imagine who will not be able to see through it. Everyone will. It is so cringe and exactly what I dn’t like, and it’s so sad that it came out after we had a chance to talk more. The night over was one of the most uncomfortable nights of my life. The first round was alright, a mini version of the previous. But I was just not in the mood for more and I was absolutely revolted at his attitude during the dinner and while at his place. The part where he talked about his passed mother and brother were more scary than anything, which is why I sat up and listened in the dead of the night. The next morning, I was already uncomfortable enough and then it became something worse. I hate his poorly hemmed and tailored pants and shirt - this has shattered my perception of people working in the financial district as people who are all equally seasoned. Then his need to say that the coffee was greek and therefore that meant it was strong. And him making this freaking loud conversation on the train at 8:30 in the morning in the lower level where everyone is slseeping, saying vocally what I do when i’m sleeping, saying how many job opportunities he gets offered through linkedin that end up in his spam - you think you’re special? - and still using freaking hotmail! I felt so uncomfortable that night and honestly I didn’t want to even look at him the rest of the way. oh god, andh im bragging while we were waiting for the train at danforth go that he used to jump into the tracks for fun, using “being drunk” as an excuse, and then saying that he used to “Be a badass”. I just... that doesn’t make you a badass, and being drunk when doing shit like that is not something you should be proud off. I texted later because I felt bad knowing that he did let me stay over, paid for half the dinner, and did confide in me wiht some very personal things... but no more. no more dinners, no more drinks, and absolutely heck NO MORE NIGHTS STAYING OVER. sex? maybe. I don’t know. but it’s a mental turn off to an extent so sudden and so repulsing for me that i honestly don’t see myself getting drawn to this and paying the price of some time just for (honestly) the biggest I’ve had. and I like that it was very, very, very involved, experience, and pleasure-centered for me.

Also, “Bristol Board”? I can’t believe I didn’t remember how annoying that was before I really confirmed staying over.

VG: this one’s a weird one. im not sure how to describe how i feel about this iether becuase it was just a few days ago and it was jarring. as i said, every guy ive ever been intimate with has etiher full on dated me or had expressed interest in dating me (PK, AF) or has told me that if they weren’t moving halfway across the world (CJ), would date, that they have always wanted, and that they can imagine a future being a petty lil couple. im just gonna say what comes to mind becuase i dont have an analysis on exactly wher ethis is going or what exactly happened. i also think the entire sitaution is been very cryptic and that i am possibly at fault for trying to see what wasnt there. its not esperation because i dont need to be with someone. how i would describe it is that we had intriguigin conversations many times over the course of a few months. we exchanged stories about sex, relatoinships, and the parat that strikes me is when he was talking about this one girl (russian?) who thought that was into her but it wasn’t really that way. did i become taht person? the hard part, is do you really invite people for drinks twice that you aren’t intersted in knowing more about? it’s ok if we are just frinds, but is that really what we are? i would not accept drinks iwht someon iwasn’t into. i wouldn’t hug someone after drinks that iwasn’t into. i woudln’t ask for a second time. l wouldn’t message them regularly or try to talk to them everyday that i see them. andi most defintiely wouldnt talk about bringing them over for drinks if i didnt want to spend time with them one on one in my place. i used to be the pedantic googler who would check every site adn figure out “WHY DID HE DO THIS WHAT DOES IT MEAN?” but really it seems to be that this is all some kind of strange ruse. none of it is real. in hidnsight i should have googled “what does it mean when a guy invites you over to his place for drinks alone one-on-one”? is that really platonic? if it is, then why doesn’t it feel platonic? why am i not doing that with all my male friends, and why, when that has hapened, has there been some sort of interest (if only them towards me?) i felt trickd and hurt when that happened. i dont want to go over the top and dig out high school me, but things were not always completely non-indicative in the office. nor were they non-indicative the first time we did something outside, which was sin and redemption or some white bar. which i didnt let go to my head, because that was normal until the vanilla comment at which i regret making, and which was totally platonic anyway because he had some coffee thing after. the second time was the sangria at that sapnish place, where that was a very long chat. he could tell that lester liked me becuase we had talked for hours on end and clealry enjoyed each other’s company, but of cousre suddenly when VG does the same, what is it? you tell me. it was interesting that day aftewrads at the starbucks, and the short thing after saying something about hosting. (before that time, i asked to ramen). then the time after that was at the canaidan very very very whtie bar then impromptu pub crawl to c’est what, and that’s when things go interesting in terms of sex talk and talking deper about stuff that wasnt quite talked about. and that time in the dog park? bzcercy? wtf was that? it was so strange. that was the first indication to me that i might be on the right track, but im starting to feel like it was an undeserved mirage. then were hte messages aafter, which yes ufture me u can go back and read them in all hteir glory. then there was that banter about hosting, which ended up happening, and i was thrilled.

day of, 2pm,some bday thing, “just remembered”, “going till midnight” hahaohahahoahoahaohoa. at this pont, i was displeasured. i was expecting, on guard the whole time, knowing that this was a very certain possibility. and it happened, and i thought maybe this guy was differnet. maybe it’s not what i thought. but you know what all those sites say? when someone has plans after that are more important, it’s becuase you aren’t important. and you should be careful.

4:20pm, how funny now that i actually read that. maybe i should be wary and avoid events that involve 420. a bottle of wine later, i realize that things started taking a downturn the second that they moved to the coach. why the FUCK did you move close to me, and why were you so open to me in the positions i was in, if that was not the intention? a one-night stand? a fuckbuddy? why chase after someone just to let them go? fo rsome reason, which i forgot (alcohol really does do things to your memory)  -  the conversation got to a point where i moved over and things started. i dont know why. and then i offered to move to the room because, well, most people don’t do this stuff in full view? why did you agree to it? why let me do it? why be in that position? why so into it?

8pm, i realize this was a mistake. i realize he was like all the other guys. problem areas: “would never bring you up again” - not that i want to be up there again. but why? do you have foresight? in what world is  bringing up a girl that you have shown previous interest in (ASSUMED, MAY BE INCORRECT.!.!) is supposed to be a chill way to chat? did i read something wrong? you nei ther want to date nor be fuckbuddies, and after tha time i realized that i would never want to date this person in the near future. having a convesration about dating should not be pulling teeth. and there is no worse feeling than knowing that you are in a relationship because someone wnated it more than the other. and when they dont make a move to hide it.

was i emotional because i drank? i dont think so. i was actually gutted. i knew it in my heart of hearts. i knew it because i had just went through one of the most uncomfortable nights of my life with AF thati kn ew i would need afew days to recover from, and i was running confused in all these directions to and from my ex. i realized and showed my ex that i missed his company, misssed how he made me feel, how he was one person i felt fully comfortable with, missed how he didnt make me cringe, didnt make obnoxious music bopping moves with his hands, - no AF - i did not like “hanging out with you” because you had young tendenceis and nonstop talked about freaking “UNDERGROUND” rap artists and 70s rock people. I had just come off such a low that i didn’t disclose to anyone - feltl ike the first time i had a true walk of shame and true disgust at a person when i left AF - that i felt like i went throug something traumatic that i had sadly vountarily put myself through. and i wanted something to mend it, something to show me it was ok, like my ex. but that’s been happening for the past while. and i think maybe a part oaf me hoped that VG would be a solution, something mending for that. i think that contriuted to me being emotional. but i know that it wasnt completely uprooted jus because of AF. I was uprooted and just thrown for a loop because of the realization of what hapened. i dont remember what happened beween the bedroom and the couch and the leaving but i do remember vividly realizing what an awful mistake i had made. and i couldnt blame anyone, just like when i bite my tongue. 

“do what you think feels right to you” is the most powerful way you can see someone’strue colours. i had never ever ever cried after sex with someone or spending intimate time with someone for the first time. not with SN, definitey not with PK - iwas over the moon, CJ was a big aha moment and realization of what could have been but the parting felt right, AF was really quite incredible. i think it was his aloofness and actually feeling like crashing down after someone lets you on. dont get me wrong, im a changed person after PK because i raelize that it’s totally possible to be so physically staissfied by someone but so emotionally detached and uninteresed... which was the case for PK and AF, but especially so for AF because of the pseudo-intellectual nature - which is my biggest pet peeve. i dont need to be with someone just because i fuck them. i guarantee that to you. sexual and emotional attraction are two separate things. so that’s how i know deep down that this is not the old undergrad innocent me believing that anytime i engage in something clsoe-knit --- that that must mean im all over the person and need to stick with them. i think this was something different b ecause i really thought he was different. and body language doesn’t lie. but i dont trust body language anymore, not in its ability to say the truth, but in its ability to be the truth and the first line of offense for someone’s decisiosn and choices. i dont know what hte apology or uber serious message is supposed to mean or be about, and i think i spent about 30 seconds seriously thinking about it before just considering it as wiping up some dank mess. but what i learned from this guy, who somehow managed to hurt me more quickly than anyone else ive been with, but yet i could imagine being with, is nto to take people’s actions at face value. all the sites are wrong. do not open yourself up. be careful. look at the people who have been pining after you for a year, trying their damnest to get you back, people who don’t see your message and ignore, people who apologize for a late message, people who don’t bring up a joke that was ignored yesterday with  a tardy response, people who when its’ convenient, strike up a conversation and reply reliably over fb (or not). i was about to say that i dont doubt that he’s a good person, but im suddenly apprehensive. i think he is mature. but i dont think that the game that was played was ever in my favor if i had known this was the endgame.

i dont uuslaly write things like this. but a lot has happened over the past year, but particularly over the past 4 months ish, and i would also say over the past 4 weeks. and i want to forget a lot of it. but first i have to put it down, let it all out, trust in myself - the same way i really put a dream to rest once the key words are down - that once this is all said and done, literally, that i make peace with myself.

 i guess my body knew, so i downed all that wine. i want to forget a lot of it because it reminds me that i cnanot always be in control, and that everyone has their own hidden agenda. i played the game with AF and got played by VG. even if that wasn’t their intnetion, i felt like i got a taste of my own medicine somehow, even though -- as i type this -- it still doesn’t make total sense becasue i don’t do the invitingfor drinks. I get invited. I guess sometimes yo utake the plunge and are honest, and when you go for it, it’s not what you want. which, for some reason, losing whtaever as a friend or whatever this shit is really sad, but i also feel like iSHOULD have been sadder for what happened. if high school self read this, i’d be mortified at myself and i would cry buckets of tears on my behalf. but this hurt less than it should have. i think the first few hours really sucked. i was in my own world on the subway. and then i think somehow things just settled in once i had a chacne to talk with SN. and when i realized that guys are 27, still growing up, still learning. i ca’nt fault them. i’m learning myself too. i can just hope i dont cause the same mixed sense, mixed signal, shot in the dark, russian roulette kind of damage i dont think i deserve.

[babymyharry]

92 truths

i was tagged by @adashofniallandasprinkleoflunacy & @fairylightsstyles !! love u binches 💘✨

Rules: Once you have been tagged you are supposed to write 92 truths about yourself. At the end, you choose 25 people to tag! (lol yikes i’m a loser on here so idk abt that)

THE LAST… 
1. Drink: to be real with u i don’t drink much and when i do it’s at high school parties but i did try a lemon drop when i was in europe last summer and my cousin sneaked me in to a club & it was pretty above average 🤔 but ig the last “drink” was a coke w coconut (idk either??) vodka and that was a wild night lmao

2. Phone call: my (kinda) mans?

3. Text message: my friend chris

4. Song you listened to: wild thoughts 😛😛

5. Time you cried: uhm i think it was wednesday it was v dramatic

HAVE YOU EVER… 
6. Dated someone twice: this dude in middle school lmao we dated for like a hot minute in 6th grade and then rekindled our love on the class trip in eighth grade aw young love

7. Been cheated on: yeah:/

8. Kissed someone and regretted it: truth or dare games fuckin suck

9. Lost someone special: my grandma was my best friend and i didn’t talk to anyone for a solid month when she passed

10. Been depressed: when i had anorexia but that was a pretty long time ago so :)

11. Gotten drunk and thrown up: nah blackout drunk doesn’t sound appealing

LIST 3 FAVOURITE COLORS: 
12. lilac

13. forest green

14. gold

IN THE LAST YEAR HAVE YOU… 
15. Made new friends: yes lmao i dropped so many friends last year so i had to make more AND my groupchat homies that i luv dearly

16. Fallen out of love: yes

17. Laughed until you cried: i surround myself with good vibes so yes many times

18. Found out someone was talking about you: oh my god rumors spread faster than wildfire at my school yes

19. Met someone who changed you: changed me? i guess they made me a better person but idk about changing me

20. Found out who your true friends are: my friend group collapsed last year and i figured out who was still around after that

21. Kissed someone on your Facebook list: who uses facebook anymore

22. How many of your Facebook friends do you know in real life: i deleted my facebook like freshmen year so ?¿

23. Do you have any pets: oh my god 3 dogs and 2 cats it’s like a zoo of fluff at my house

24. Do you want to change your name: nah i’m cool

25. What did you do for your last birthday: my friend max threw me a surprise party and it got wayyyy too lit to be honest

26. What time did you wake up: today i woke up at 6 to see the sunrise bc my kinda mans has a balcony in his room with a good ass view for that

27. What were you doing at midnight last night: sleeping lmao i’m a grandma

28. Name something you cannot wait for: my shawn concert!!!

29. When was the last time you saw your mother: tonight when she exposed me so i’m currently not speaking w her lmao

30. What is one thing you wish you could change about your life: maybe if my parents could be home more, they’re not really around much sometimes and that kinda sucks

31. What are you listening to right now: this weird ass netflix movie that my little cousin is forcing me to watch bc nash grier is in it kill me now

32. Have you ever talked to a person named Tom: my friend abigail’s dad’s name is tom and lemme tell u he’s lowkey a dilf 🤔👀

33. Something that is getting on your nerves: this netflix movie it’s so cringe

34. Most visited website: snapchat i think??

35. Elementary: worst 8 years of my life

36. High School: finally almost done

37. College/university: im going lmao

38. Hair colour: blonde

39. Long or short hair: my hair was down to my butt and i just chopped it all off (yes, i pulled a harry styles) to my shoulders to donate and i honestly really like it short!!

40. Do you have a crush on someone: :-)

41. What do you like about yourself: i think i’m a pretty nice and chill person like i’m totally bragging here but i was voted funniest and nicest junior this year for the yearbook and like :D that’s just a nice feeling and it was validated !!

42. Piercings: technically two on both ears and when i was 15 i let my boyfriend’s (now ex boyfriend lol) older brother’s friend pierce my nose bc i wanted to piss my dad off but i don’t wear anything in it anymore so

43. Blood type: o negative actually!!

44. Nickname: a looootttt of my friends call me aj (like more than my actual name) and then some just call me manda but yeah aj is the most nickname outa those so

45. Relationship status: i’m a fuckboy man idk what’s going on

46. Zodiac sign: cancer

47. Pronouns: she/her

48. Favourite TV show: criminal minds omgggg how do you become a screen writer bc i have some dope ideas for that show lemme tell you

49. Tattoos: none but i wanna get some!!

50. Right or left hand: righty

FIRST… 
51. Surgery: spinal fusion man it succckkkeedd

52. Piercing: ears

54. Sport: i started ballet when i was 3 idk if that counts but

55. Vacation: my aunt and uncle’s lake house in montana

56. Pair of trainers: they were these cute little adidas there’s sooo many pics of me in those

57. Eating: that di… plz excuse me lmfao but nah i’m actually eating watermelon :-)

58. Drinking: water 💦

59. I’m about to: jump off a building bc i was exposed tonight by my very own parents 👍🏼

60. Listening to: now me and my little cousin are watching captain america (only bc i saw andrea’s post and decided to try it idk why i trust trash but im)

61. Waiting for: my trust issues to choke

62. Want: mozzarella sticks idk

63. Get married: yeah one day

64. Career: something in film so like cinematography or directing or just something creative like that 😋

YOUR TYPE… 
65. Hugs or kisses: depends on who it is ya feel

66. Lips or eyes: eyes definitely

67. Shorter or taller: well like.. boys fs taller but girls idc ?¿

68. Older or younger: older bc immaturity is a turn off

70. Nice arms or nice stomach: not to make everything about harold but he’s just got the perf body to me like toned arms and a soft tummy.. yes please

71. Sensitive or loud: i mean they gotta be both in certain situations but overall i guess loud

72. Hook up or relationship: i’m a fucking mess i have trust issues AND commitment issues so like.. both make death appealing

73. Troublemaker or hesitant: troublemaker fs

HAVE YOU EVER… 
74. Kissed a stranger? again, truth or dare games suck

75. Drank hard liquor? once but it was at this rich white boy’s house and i deadass felt like he snuck it from his grandpa’s stash to get it and i was like ?¿ 🌚

76. Lost glasses contact/lenses: i don’t wear them so

77. Turned someone down: i curve like 90% of the dudes hitting me up like boys are just annoying tbh

78. Sex on first date: i mean my virginal self would not kno but i have made out with a couple guys at parties or whatever so

79. Broken someone’s heart: yes and i’m not sorry lmao

80. Had your heart broken: it’s awful man yeah

81. Been arrested: totally came close one time bc ig someone called the cops on the party i was at and police showed up and my freshmen ass ran so fast bitch i was usain bolt deadass

82. Cried when someone died: oh yeah

83. Fallen for a friend: i mean it was mutual but unfortunately

DO YOU BELIEVE IN
84. Yourself: i do

85. Miracles: i think some crazy things can happen that make ppl value that particular thing a lot more but idk about miracles

86. Love at first sight: lust at first sight* bc u cant be in love with someone’s outer appearance without knowing what they’re like as a person

87. Santa Claus: a very small part of me

88. Kiss on the first date: why not

89. Angels: definitely

OTHER… 
90. Current best friend’s name: kelsey

91. Eye colour: blue

92. Favourite movie: the devil wears prada always 🗣

imma tag @ihearthemcallingxx @stylessemantics @honeyskins @moonchildstyles @hardliquorhaz @nips-and-tats @iloveyouhaz @inwhichitrytowritesomething @jadexthirlwalls @tiostyles (idk if any of u have already done this omg sry)