#reading your writing again is making me so fking happy | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

alkhale · 4 years ago

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change the channel (Ko-Fi Request) Kenma Kozume/Camgirl!Omega!Reader

hello! Id love a kenma x reader fic (maybe a/b/o) ?? Also, thank you so so much for writing so many amazing fanfics :) every time I read a new chapter from any of your stories, it makes my day <3

OFC COURSE YOU CAN!!!! And thank you so much for your support and for your donation! AND THANK YOU!! I know this one is long overdue, but I hope you enjoy!

I’m also killing two birds with this one, it’s substituting for Typetober Day 16: back and forth (using change the channel instead)

title: change the channel

pairing: Kenma Kozume/Omega!Reader

rating: T/very slight M

summary:

Kenma taps his phone again, right back at your picture. He stares at you with wide, piercing eyes, leaning across the table and quickly saying, reverent and eager—

“I want to buy your game from you.”

Today, sitting here beside you in your bag, are fully equipped items to try and protect you from the creepy, deranged, rich stranger you’d been about to meet. Today, you were fully expecting to unleash a fury building up inside of you over an injustice you can’t tackle on your own in your society on some poor, unsuspecting alpha—

Here, sitting in front of you, is a self-claimed internet game streamer, who wants to buy your… special edition… game?

“You want…” you say, slowly, making sure you don’t have this wrong, “...my game?”

He nods.

You open your mouth. It closes. You open it again, raise a finger, and then press your lips together, staring at him.

“I’m sorry,” you say finally. “What?”

link to AO3 for easier reading: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27446191

Omegachion has signed on!

The monitor screen flickers to life.

An empty room appears. A plush, pink cushioned desk chair is in view. Along the cream, soft colored walls are a series of posters that usual garner less attention. A bookshelf is tucked to the side, complete with a set of potted plants hanging in clean pots—clearly loved. Within the stack of books sits shelves stuffed full with what looks to be discs and an assortment of other items.

The website's main frame appears—SecondGlanceStreaming.com. The design is sleek and black—clean and unassuming. A password is prompted, followed by a series of typed keys and then a click.

On the side of the screen a chatroom appears, coupled with a monitored security system in place established by the website. A cherry icon pops to life. Once the chatroom opens, the entire website flickers with light.

Omegalovers has signed on.

Rockyroadncream has signed on.

Omegasarekings has signed on.

Cumqueen324 has signed on.

Mrknottt has signed on.

Msbyjackalboi23 has signed on.

Openwideandsmile has signed on.

Sunnydayandnight has signed on.

Marshmellowtime has signed on.

Thecoolestalpha has signed on.

Bettagetbeta has signed on.

KingKodzuken has signed on.

Kodzu00 has signed on.

The chatrooms explodes with messages. A series of greetings are quickly issued by long-time fans and watchers of the streams, asking how your day was and how you’re feeling. A few more perverse, slimy messages are mixed in-between, demanding for the crude and obscene. A few others snipe back, telling the users to get their hands out of their pants while a series of other users greet each other instead, talking about the excitement over tonight's stream.

You hang back a bit, one arm crossed under your chest, puffed up with the fleecy soft fabric of your jacket while the other hand holds a jelly drink, sipping it in silence. You watch the chatroom explode, quickly gaining more and more users as others signed on to your stream. You check the time on your phone, sighing before you finish off your drink and toss it into the trash can.

You place the fuzzy bunny mask over your eyes, checking how you look in the mirror. You swipe your mouth with your thumb, applying your lip gloss and then smiling cutely at your reflection.

“Alright,” you say. “The goal tonight is 7,000 cherries… you got this!”

You clap your hands over your face and beam. Showtime.

You slide into the monitor’s view, the webcam flickering to life. The chat comes back with more force, messages spamming into the box and a series of cherries already floating into the screen. You beam, laughing as you wave to your viewers and blow them all kisses. “Hello! Hello everyone! I love to see so many of you are so punctual… Needy omegas like me… we love reliable people, you know?”

You hold back a snicker as the chat increases with your words. People shooting messages back at you as you let out a cute giggle. Tonight’s outfit is nothing but a cotton candy pink fleece zip-up that falls to the top of your thighs, also exposing your bare, smooth collarbones. It’s a special occasion, so you’re going the extra mile.

“How are we all doing tonight?” you ask sweetly, holding your chin up with your hands as you watch the chatroom, skimming over the responses. “Aw, Bettagetbeta, I’m sorry to hear that! I hope things get better for you… do you need a hug?”

Cherry icons pop up over your screen. 50. 30. 10. You smile, opening your arms to the camera. “There! I’ll make all your problems go away, okay?”

You bat your eyes under the mask, showing them your bare wrists and giving them a little rub with your thumbs. “You can scent me if you’d like… would that make you feel better?”

Bettagetbeta has gifted you 30 cherries!

Bigboialpha has gifted you 350 cherries!

“Bigboialpha!” you squeak, covering your mouth with your hands. “That’s too sweet of you! Did you want to scent me that badly?”

Your chatroom shakes from the force of scrambled messages. You smile, shyly running a finger up and down the slightly swollen scent glands of your wrist. You’ve timed this just right—and just as you thought, your viewers notice too, instantly spamming the boxes with more fervent messages, begging to scent you, begging to be with you, wrap you up in their smells—

(God, you make me want to vomit.)

“If you’re extra good,” you say sweetly, “you could… maybe even…”

You tease show off more of your bare shoulder, showing a pink bra strap. You slightly expose the side of your neck, bringing your fingers up dangerously close to your most sensitive scent glands. Cherry icons flash across the screen and you hold back an excited grin, feet tapping anxiously underneath your desk.

There’s a new flurry of disgusting messages, of big, handsome alphas promising to do all kinds of things to you if you’d let them. You roll your eyes under your mask, holding back curling your lip in disgust as they prattle on about how they’d take care of you, make you feel so, so good and—

“All right, all right, that’s enough teasing, right?” you say. “Everyone, thank you so much for signing on again tonight! If you’re new to my streams, welcome! We’re so happy to have you. I’m lucky to have you. It’s a special night tonight, you know why?”

Gonna come for us on screen?

Face reveal! Face reveal!

Omegachion i would do anything for u

Pls let me touch u

Take off ur jacket

Stfu and let her talk u horn dogs

Fking disgusting dont ruin the stream

Open ur legs, baby girl

“Because!” you say, throwing your arms into the air. You spin once in your chair, showing off the room and stopping right in front of the screen again. “I just got it in the mail today…”

You bring up the sleek red box that’d been waiting to the side of your desk. You beam, showing it off to your viewers. “Tadah! Do you know what this is? It’s a gift from our generous website hosts—a gift for reaching the Gold Status on streaming! Everyone, thank you so much! I couldn’t have done this without you!”

The chatroom pops with congratulations. There’s some demanding comments, ordering for a consolation prize. You skim through them all, smiling a bit at the paragraphs of kind words and thanks. They’re the viewers you wish you could treat with a little more care, give them something a little more for all they do.

“Want to see what the gift was?” you ask. You pop open the lid and show off the gift—a dark red, leather collar coupled with a golden dog tag. It’s a stylish thing, slim fitted and clearly of great quality, there’s a thickened edge to the leather, coupled with a lock and key.

It’s an omega collar.

You smile through your teeth. The stench of the perfume from the box makes you want to wretch, but you hold it for the camera as your viewers beg you to put it on. “Oh, I don’t know… should I?”

You play with it, showing it off to them against the column of your neck. They’re feverish and desperate.

“I don’t deserve something this nice,” you say, shaking your head.

Tease

Don’t cover up that beautiful neck

Dont blueball us

I only want to see u in my collar

“That’s right,” you say innocently. “I don’t want to cover up what belongs to you guys…” you show off your neck to them again, touching with your fingertips your own bonding gland, unmarked and bare. The chatroom is almost unrecognizable, going off into a feeding frenzy.

You turn back to the screen, smiling.

(You’re like babies.)

You drop the box out of view of the camera into your trashcan, kicking it under the table with more force than necessary. You ought to burn the fucking thing but leather probably doesn’t burn well.

I can’t believe I’m already at 4,000 cherries. You feel excitement replace the disgust, toes curling against your hardwood floor. You got this, amp it up a little bit.

“Since I couldn’t have made it this far without all of you,” you say, touching a hand to your chest and playing with your zipper. “I wanted to do something special—not just this stream! But a nice little event, how does that sound?”

You click your mouse, opening up a new box and icon for your viewers. “Can everyone see the royalty program alright? Yeah? Perfect! If you look, you’ll see the cute little banner we had set up and everything.”

You hold up your phone, smiling beside it. “For these set prices, I’ll be doing a series of special events, just for all of you guys for all the support you’ve given me!”

You point.

“50 cherries and you get a sweet text with a picture from me,” you say. “Each picture will be different, and none of them alike! Keep it between us though, okay? Hehe, I mean it! For 100 cherries, I’ll do a one minute call and for 300 cherries, a three minute call, just with you! For 500, we’ll do a private web-chat session and finally, the big one…”

You smile, “For 1,500 cherries, I’ll be doing a special, in-person meet and greet! How does that sound?”

The reactions are instantaneous.

Cherries already start popping up all over your screen, users filling out the roles and eagerly thanking you for everything while others spit at the prices. You ignore those comments, secretly marking certain users to be blocked. You know the last one is outrageous, how could it not be? Did they think you’d want to meet with any of them? You’d discussed this with several other streamers and they’d all done similar things—this deterred creeps and kept you safe. Usually no one ended up doing the meet and greet. It was too expensive.

It was foolproof.

I can’t wait to hear your voice

Will it be nudes

I want nudes

Thank you so much for doing this!

“I should be the one thanking you guys!” you squeal. Your eyes dart to the corner of your screen, watching the cherries roll in. Your heartbeat accelerates and you do the quick math in your head. “Oh my goodness! Sitwhereveryoulike, thank you so much for the Cherries! And you too, theprettiestalpha! Thank you!”

As it should be. You grin at the screen, prattling on with sweet words and thanks. You teasingly unzip a little more of your jacket, greedily watching the cherries pop-up all over the screen, trying to make conversation where you can and—

A single chat bubble pops up in the corner. You almost miss the question, but you’re almost certain your eyes don’t betray you. If you hadn’t seen the title so many times, you would’ve blown right past it.

(But you’re a true fan, down to your core, you could never miss a mention of—)

Is your username based on Water Emblem?

“Hello, Kodzu00!” you say quickly, trying to stifle your surprise. “Yes, it is! You must be new to the streams.”

You gesture behind you, smiling shyly at the poster of Varth on the back of your wall. “I’m actually a bit of a fan! I know the series is old and everyone’s excited for the new reboots, but I grew up with the old one.”

Ah, stop right there, don’t keep talking about it. You’re going to lose viewers! Your fingers fly back to your zipper, teasingly dragging it down another inch. You could talk about Water Emblem for hours, but you can’t—this is a stream after all. “Bigboialpha! I guess we’ll be having that private webchat after all… mhm! I’m looking forward to it—huh? What I’ll be wearing? Well…”

You cutely run your fingers up and down the column of your neck, bringing their attention back to your scent glands. “Would you… pick for me?”

You almost gag at the comment suggestions. You watch more cherries roll in—shit, another 500? I might make my goal after all! No, you would make your goal. You have to. The sooner you rake in the dough from these streams, the sooner you could—

For the meet and greet, would it be in person?

You blink, startled by the question. You quickly glance back to the username. Kudzu00 again? “Uh, yes! Yes, it would be~ I’d pick a nice location for us and we’d meet. Wouldn’t that be nice everyone?”

For how long?

Who even is this lol

Damn big bucks

Show us the tits already

Pls sit on my face

Your outfit is so cute today!

You swallow nervously. Calm down. What are you even freaking out for? No one in their right mind was ever going to drop that much money to meet with some stranger from the internet—no one.

“Fifteen minutes,” you say cheerfully, keeping one eye on the chat. Have I seen this user before? “There’s a lot we could do—ah, I mean talk about in fifteen minutes, right?”

Kodzu00 is typing…

The chat bubble disappears. You eye it for a few more seconds before shrugging your shoulders. Shake it off. You needed to keep this celebration stream going. You slyly bring your bare knees up and watch the chat go a little more wild, quick questions being shot about whether or not you’re wearing anything under that jacket. You keep the conversations going, sweetly asking the users about what they’d like to do, what kind of pictures and if—

A bright icon flashes on your screen. You glance over.

Kodzu00 has gifted you 3,000 cherries!

You freeze.

On your monitor the chat continues to fire off. A few people notice the notification. You blink, once, twice, before taking a second glance at the numbers.

3,000.

3,000 cherries?

3,000….

The calculation is quick in your head. You’re terribly good with money, sadly. The final statement minus the small deduction for processing appears in your mind’s eye and you balk.

HOLY FUCK.

Lol i think u broke her

God damn

Congratulations, Omegachion!

“K-K-Kodzu00!” you say, head spinning. “Thank you so much! Oh—oh my goodness! Thank you so much for your donation!” What the fuck, what the fuck, what the fuck, what the fuck— “I can’t believe you’d be so generous! Thank you so much! I’m so excited to meet you! Our first meet and greet!”

WHAT THE FUCK?

You quickly try to hold your composure, continuing with the stream. Calm down. Calm down. Calm down. Finish the show! You laugh, trying not to look at the history of the notification and focusing on your show instead. You thank every piece of good sense inside you for using a mask, hiding the sweat rolling down your face as you teasingly stand up for your audience, bending down a bit.

“Now, how about we end the night with a little… cuddle, hmm?” you say shakily, unzipping your jacket the rest of the way to show off the lacy, soft pink color of your bra. The chat bubbles pop up by the dozens, but you never see even a lick of Kodzu00 again. What the hell? “C’mon, you know how badly I wish you were here to scent me… wrap me up in that smell of yours…”

(Give them what they all want.)

What feels like hours finally passes in a span of minutes and you quickly say goodbye to your watchers, blowing them a kiss and zipping your jacket backup as you finally sign off. You sit there, staring at the screen of your loading page, dumbfounded.

Limply, your finger finds its way to your mouse. You give it a click.

The final total for your earnings tonight appears in a tacky, almost shady colored box. You stare at it in silence.

9,750 Cherries.

Nine…. Nine thousand…

Almost 1,000,000 yen?

“Yes!” you screech, grabbing your head with your hands as you fly up from your chair. You kick the stupid, plush pink thing aside. “Yes! Yes! Yes!”

This is insane! You almost want to cry in disbelief. This is—this is it! This is what I needed! I’m so close! I’m so close! You know the other streams won’t rake in nearly as much, but this is the final push you needed—if you kept up this kind of participation for another few months, your fees would be nothing! You’d be able to even afford a little extra and get something nice, replace your bathtub and treat yourself to an expensive dinner and all thanks to this stupid job and—

The grand, generous donation of Kodzu00—

You freeze. Your pure, unrestrained elation plummets. Reality clocks you sideways in the face and you slap yourself for being so dumb—how could I even forget? Your eyes dart back to the screen and you pull up the donation history, staring in dark silence at the simple, blaring donation of cherries, already transferred to your account and not even pending and—

Your joy is quickly replaced with something much more dire. You gape at the amount. The award title beside it appears. You stare.

And stare.

A thirty minute meet and greet.

You’d be meeting in person with this person for at least half and hour and—

What the hell?

You power off your screens, flying to your room and kicking the streaming room door shut behind you. You lunge for your bed, scrambling for your laptop, covered in Water Emblem stickers. You pop it open, quickly pulling up your admin account for the streaming sight and accessing your private passwords. You pull up the user history for all your past streams, typing in the username Kodzu00—

Nothing?

You stare at the blank history. The only entry is tonight’s stream. The very first time this user has ever showed up.

Alarm bells start ringing in your head. You pull up your emergency tab, a self-made list of all your red-flag boxes to check in cases like this for your safety. You click on Kodzu00’s account, searching through their profile.

MADE THIS MORNING? You gape in disbelief, staring at the entirely blank profile. It’s even void of an icon for a profile pic. The account was literally made today, just for this stream, and this god damn stranger just gifted you basically 300,000 yen—

This is insane! All your alarm bells nearly fall off their stands. You search for any kind of information, scrambling and double-checking your banned users lists for any potential matches. Was it some creep trying to meet you from before? A stalker? Were they under a different name and made the separate account just to do this to you so they wouldn’t get caught? What’s their deal?

(What’s your selling point for this whole thing?)

You pause, fingers halting over your keyboard.

You’ve had rich donations before. Users with too much time and money on their hands—users you’re gladly willing to take from in the pursuit of a better life for yourself. Your crowd ranges anyway; from nervous, shy little dorks to kind, quiet people looking for company to disgusting, wretched lechers and stupid alphas who like nothing more than little, docile omegas to rub their garbage scent over—

You stare at Kodzu00’s user profile, feeling something bitter and dark and ugly bubble up in the pits of your stomach.

Any person, male or female, who’d be willing to drop that much money to meet with a streamer like you, notorious for what you do, for what you market—can’t be a good person by any means.

They only want one thing.

You grind your teeth, knowing you’ve got no choice but to reap what you sowed. This was the path to quick cash you chose, so you can’t back down now. You’ll just have to do everything in your power to make sure you remain successful.

You close your laptop screen, ripping your stupid mask off your face and tossing it to the side.

You weren’t backing down.

--- (change the channel) ----

You started streaming in high school.

The middle of your last year, to be exact.

It started off simple enough, to be honest. Nothing eventful, nothing worth writing biographies or harrowing documentaries off of. It was another story amidst the thousands in Tokyo’s Metropolitan streets.

By all legal health records and means, you are an omega.

(What does that mean?)

Within Tokyo’s urban and suburban streets, it means a collection of different ideals and social norms. It means nothing to plenty, it means everything to others—to your youthful eyes growing up, it’d just meant you were a little different from some of your other peers, but not isolated, no, never isolated—there were other omegas, after all, despite the smaller population.

You get along with people fine. You make friends fine, have a few crushes, get average enough grades and have a particular fondness for social media—you just live your life on top of having to deal with certain physiological functions others around you may not experience the same.

You think by all means until your last year of high school, that it really does mean nothing. Society is so modern now, people don’t even blink, right? There’s none of those second gender stereotypes or outrageous cult worships—you’re just another person trying to live their life to the fullest.

“A doctor? Are you sure that’s what you want to do?”

You smiled at your teacher in the faculty office. See? Normal—

You stopped.

“See, that’s a great dream,” the teacher said, pointing to your paper. He tapped it, scratching his rough stubble. “But it’s not very realistic with your current standing, you know?”

“You mean my grades? I can work extra hard. They’ve been more than above passing, and what really matters is the entrance exams and testing—”

“Not just that,” he said. He pulled up your student file. He gave you a second look, up and down, and he seemed to find pity in your hopefully confused expression. “Listen, (L/n), here’s the thing—a doctor… is a pretty important position, you know? Very important.”

You nodded like you didn’t already know that. Like you hadn’t been spending the last years of your educational life aspiring toward that goal, that dream.

“They need to be physically… available,” your teacher said. “They have to work outrageous shift hours, they have to work hard on top of that, and then they have to take special medication to regulate their pheromones if they need to, and then the schooling on top of all that is hard work.”

You waited for your teacher to explain why any of those things was supposed to get in the way of your one and only dream of saving lives.

“I’ll make this easy for you to understand, kid,” you teacher said. He taps his nametag, pointing to his little alpha symbol.

“Omegas just don’t become doctors.”

Your dainty, prettily crafted world of normalcy and mundane content shattered around you in one violent, screeching halt.

You smiled at your teacher, nails digging painfully into your thighs.

“I’m sorry?”

“It’s just not a typical job preference,” your teacher said. “Look, you’re not the only one, I promise. There are a few omega doctors, sure, we need them anyway to make things easier or make sense of stuff alpha based doctors or betas might not understand, but the demand isn’t high and the placement is extremely competitive. Trust me, kid. I know.”

You kind of wanted to spit at your teacher that no, this pot-bellied, alpha gym teacher couldn’t possibly know more than you do about trying to break into the medical industry as an omega. But the thing is—what are the statistics? You hardly see any. Every website you’d researched thus far has always been welcoming, nowhere on their platforms or pamphlets saying anything about omegas being doctors or not and—

You froze.

“Everyone is welcome!” the videos all said. “Everyone is encouraged to try!”

“This is the real truth,” your teacher said. “They’ll all tell you you can do it because they’re not allowed to discriminate or turn anyone away. They’ll let you do whatever you want, but when it really comes down to the acceptances or not? You’ll just get turned away and you’ll have wasted all that time for nothing.

“Omegas aren’t considered suitable candidates for doctors,” your teacher said. “That market tends to go to betas, believe it or not. A nice little mediator.”

Your teacher tossed your career planning forms onto a stack of dozens. You stared at it, smiling continuously with your fingers digging harder into your thighs. He sighed, waving a hand.

“You should shoot for a hospital receptionist,” your teacher said. “It’s the next best thing, right? Or you could teach biology at a school instead. You might even be able to get by as a school nurse—”

“I’m going to apply to medical school.”

Your teacher stopped, looking at you.

You smiled back at him.

(Being an omega was supposed to stop you?)

What a load of shit.

“I don’t really care about anything else,” you said. “I’ve wanted to become a doctor my whole life. If people say I can’t do it because of something they can’t even see, then I’m still going to do it. They can’t stop me.”

Your teacher stared at you for a few minutes. He leaned back in his chair, considering his next words before he finally said—

“You got the money?”

You stopped.

Your family is pitifully lower middle class. Your parents make enough to pay the bills, afford a vacation every now and then, and just get by fair enough without being too stressed—but small issues, like your own medical costs for heat suppressants or a flat tire can easily set your family back several paychecks.

No, you don’t have money for medical school. You’d already known that looking at all the pamphlets. But there were scholarships and stipends and loans—

“If you want to waste your time with this pipe dream, it’s not my job to stop you,” he said, pointing to your career form. “It’s not really ethical either, so don’t come back and file any lawsuits against me. But your medical schools don’t offer many scholarships, and the ones they do aren’t going to go to that one, average ranking omega they’d rather not even have to worry about.”

Your teacher shrugged.

“Go ahead and be a doctor, kid, but you’re going to need money to do it.”

(This is the reality. People are not equal. Being an omega means—)

Means what?

-- ---- (change the channel) ----

You remember laying in your bed that night, scrolling mindlessly through random social media outlets. You’d spent the last several hours searching extensively for any and all scholarships you might even remotely be able to apply for, but none of them seemed willing to help an omega into their waiting hospital wings—your best bet was going to be taking out a loan. Several. That’s on top of cram school costs, textbooks, entrance fees and whether or not I can pass the exam—

No, you would. You had too. You weren’t about to let some stupid, invisible consensus a group of people somewhere or another had decided on stop you.

“Thank you again for the generous donations! You guys are too good to me!”

You’d paused, staring at your bright screen. One of the streamers you followed from time to time—he was an omega, cute and docile and in all honesty, probably the picture perfect cookie cutter definition of one. He always posted great tips on fashion or about cute cafes he enjoyed, and always seemed to be proud of the fact that he was an omega despite how cringingly he played into the stereotypes—

You glanced at his caption, freezing in disbelief.

Designer bags littered his floor. He showed off his pretty watch, batting his lashes at the camera, talking about how the donations from last night’s stream helped him live a good, cushiony life, making him feel like he was being taken care of even without an alpha by his side.

You’d stalked his account almost religiously for the next few weeks, watching his streams, watching the way he… flaunted his nature as an omega. Your parents had always told you you were fine the way you were, but being an omega had never been something to be proud of—you’d just preferred to act like a beta more than anything else. What was the point? To some extent, your teacher was right, there were no benefits to being an omega except—

“Thank you again for all your donations!”

You pulled up your laptop, searching extensively for every little obscure article you could find on the nature of streaming services. You’d never taken social media outlets that seriously, always looked at influencers and vloggers with a grain of salt—you were aspiring to be a full-time heart surgeon after all, but if there was actually something...reasonable behind the way all these people would act, proudly showing off the fact that they were omegas in exchange for something monetary…

(Did people enjoy this?)

Yeah you can make money from it, lol.

You stared at the internet thread, blinking in disbelief.

One user amongst thousands in the thread had responded to your question.

Ppl always keep saying that omegas are this and that. Society likes to paint a pretty picture of what we call equality. Ads and those videos u watch in school and stuff, they all tell u you can be whatever u want to be if u try, but that’s not rlly the truth. The only thing they were honest about was that you’d have to work hard for what you want in life.

You scrolled down.

You have to do the research on ur own and find respectable sites. I can give u recommendations, but u have to kind of get yourself prepared for what you’re signing up for too. Everyone likes to go on television and talk about how all three genders are the same, but we’re not. It’s not even just whether ur female or male anymore, everyone always finds something to pick at, don’t they?

U might get hate for it but whatever, those people who sit on a nicer chair than you and don’t pay your bills don’t get to criticize you for what you want to do and how u do it.

They always tell us we can’t do things because we’re omegas. That we have to be a certain way because we’re omegas and we’re only good for one thing.

So just give them what they want.

And suck them dry.

You remember clearly, that night, pulling up the user’s account and shooting them the message that would change your life.

What sites do you recommend for beginners?

Youcanruletheworld is typing…

----- (change the channel) -----

You triple check all your items, rearranging them on your bed in front of you.

Your outfit is cute, matching your streamer personality but remaining modest enough to keep you protected from unwanted attention. You’ll be wearing a face mask on top of it, just for the extra mile too. You’d already reached out to this Kodzu00 and sent them the notification for where to meet and when, and what you’d look like so they’d be able to find you. Wisely, as always, you picked a neutral location—an extremely popular cafe two hours away from your house just to be safe.

Safety alarm—check. Pepper spray, check. Pheromone repellent, check. Emergency contact button, check. Location synced devices and emergency heat suppressant pills on top of—

You stare at the last item. It comes special with the standard emergency omega safety kit—you almost spit at the name—it’s a quick, easy attachable lock-on collar to protect your bonding glands in the case of an unruly and disgusting attack.

You want to call it ridiculous.

(Behind your eyes you see the comments scrolling over the glowing screen. You see the leering words and the lecherous promises and the disgusting sentences that rattle your brain and make you stand a minute longer in the shower, fingernails digging into your skin—)

You don’t say anything, zipping the bag closed and taking all your items with you.

---- (change the channel) -----

Thirty minutes, it’s just thirty minutes, you can do this. You aggressively slurp on your straw, furiously dogging the cafe patrons with your eyes, keeping them narrowed and peeled for anyone who ought to fit the bill over what you were expecting to meet today. Thirty minutes.

The black iced coffee with an added two shots isn’t doing anything to calm your nerves, but it’s doing everything you need to keep yourself pumped and ready to go at a moment’s notice. The cafe is busy, just as always, with people swarming left and right, in and out—this creep won’t be able to do any of their normal creep tendencies in a place like this.

You bite your straw, tapping your feet under the table.

Alright, Kodzu00, do your worst. I’m leaving here after the thirty and I’m taking the cash with me—

“Excuse me,” you stop, mouth hovering and open over your near chewed through straw, “are you… uh… Omegachion?”

Hearing your streamer username in real life makes you both want to gag and sigh in happiness. The username was arguably the only way for you to feel remotely sane logging into the streaming service every time for your scheduled program because Water Emblem got you through anything, including all the cram sessions to get into medical school.

Your eyes swing rapidly to your right, moving your head so fast you take your straw with you.

Ice coffee drips onto the table.

The young man standing in front of you is… is, truthfully, not what you expected. Okay, sure, weirdos on the internet come in all shapes and sizes, but to your own bias, you’ve crafted a bit of a face for the specific types of users who flood your streams. He narrowly passes even an inch of those ideas, with the slightly messy hair, the baggy clothes that look like all he does is stay in front of his computer all day and the dark lines under his eyes, but other than that—

He’s a lean young man, from what you can barely tell, underneath the baggy black sweatshirts and the sleek black joggers, lined in white with a logo you don’t recognize. There’s a dark cap on top of his head as well, and he’s sporting a simple black face mask, just like you—the most color the damn guy has is the bleached blonde tips still growing out past his roots, spilling a bit past his shoulders while the rest is gathered back into a bun.

In an instant you quickly size him up—the guy’s probably only a few inches taller than you and he can’t be that much older or younger, somewhere probably around your age.

You pluck out your straw. He squints faintly at you, holding his phone, glancing back at his screen and then back to you and shifting, albeit uncertainly. He looks like he’d rather be anywhere else but here right now.

“You’re,” you start, “uh, you’re Kodzu00?”

“Yes,” he says. “That’s… me.”

You stare.

He stares right back.

(His golden eyes are almost like slits, you realize, a bit stunned, they drip gold and heather.)

He has pretty eyes.

“It’s,” he says, awkward, not sounding friendly at all, “...nice to meet you…”

And then reality comes back, this time with a spinning roundhouse right to your face.

This is the guy who just dropped money to come and meet you here today.

This guy.

You stare at him in disbelief.

Kodzu00 stands there in front of you, looking as though he wished he could melt right through the floor and disappear. He slowly starts to make his way into the chair opposite of you, pulling it out and taking a seat, setting his phone down beside him like it’s a lifeline and—

Your eyes bulge at the sight of his watch. You know how much that watch costs.

Your alarm bells start firing off again. For a brief moment, unease colors your scent, lightly flooding the area until you instantly reel it back in. Kodzu00 glances up at you for a second but you keep your face calm and friendly, quickly slipping back into your streamer personality, your best mask and first line of defense against whatever the hell this weirdo wants with you and time is ticking—

Before you can even utter a single word, Kodzu00 pulls down his mask.

(He’s… well, he’s not bad looking either, in a… weird kind of way.)

“Look, I need to clear the air first and get this on the table,” he says it a bit quickly, despite the low, almost uncaring inclination to his tone. You blink at him. The tips of his ears are staining pink beneath the fading streaks of blonde and he continues, “I’m not here for your streams.”

You blink.

You stare at him, dumbfounded and hopelessly confused.

“I’ve never even seen them before until last night,” he says just as quickly, looking embarrassed to even utter those words. “Let’s get that straight, okay? So I’m not… here for… that.”

That.

“That?” you say like a robot.

He looks more and more uncomfortable, but he presses on, whispering quickly over the table, “Yeah. I’m not here for… that. So… you can… uh… just be normal, I guess.”

You stare at Kodzu00, the man who’s just payed off nearly the last of your student loans in debt, who’s only here in front of you today because he got in touch with you through one of those very streams which very much markets that, which is meant to appeal to all the what-nots who just want to see an omega bat her eyelashes and act like an omega, to feel comforted or have their egos stroked and—

“I don’t watch any streams like that,” he adds for good measure. “I don’t. One of my viewers reached out to me because… well… because they watched your streams and noticed something and mentioned it to me, so I wanted to check it out myself.”

Oh my god. You sit there in the middle of the bustling cafe. Am I about to die? This is it, isn’t it. Kodzu00 is actually some kind of crazy internet stalker or person and you’re about to get stabbed right across the cafe table and this will be the end, you’ll never even get to save anyone’s life or help anyone and their bad hearts or do anything beyond your stupid streams and that’s all you’ll be remembered for.

“Kodzu00 is just a name I made for that night,” he says quickly. “Online I run a gaming channel under the user Kodzuken—you can just call me Kenma though. Kenma Kozume.”

“Uh,” you say. “Kucina. You can call me Kucina.” You are not giving your real name out to this stranger who can potentially threaten your entire standing in your medical career and out you for the unethical nature of how you’ve been procuring money to pay your school fees—

Kenma briefly pauses, eyes flickering up to you. He looks a bit pleased with your choice of alias but quickly glances back to his phone. You feel, strangely, a little… a little happy too.

Wait, wait, wait. No, this guy is a weirdo and don’t forget that he’s a complete stranger online claiming to be a game streamer and—

“The only reason I’m here today is for this,” he says, pulling out his phone. You instantly grow wary, inching back a bit from the table. There’s a bit of excitement finally creeping into his otherwise mundane voice, and it’s giving you the spooks. Kenma taps, quickly navigating his screen before he pulls up one blurred, pixelated image and turns his screen to show it to you.

“Why is this a screenshot of my room?” you say roughly, narrowing your eyes at him. You point to the screen shot of your streaming room and your face caught mid-speech, making you look dumb. “What are you trying to—”

“It’s not that,” he says, sounding a bit stressed out by this whole ordeal. He looks visibly uncomfortable with the image of you, only in your bright pink bra and you raise an eyebrow at him, suspicious as he zooms in and quickly moves the screen to—

“This,” he says, fervent, almost reverent actually, “is what I wanted to talk to you about.”

Carefully, still suspicious, you lean over the table and look closer at his phone screen. You follow his finger, quickly recognizing your bookshelf, your posters, and then right beside Kenma’s fingertip is—

You blink.

You know exactly what he’s pointing to.

You also know exactly what it looks like in perfect detail despite the blurry picture. It’s a large box, big enough to hold against your chest, sleek white and blue, with silver lettering line in a kind of glowing, aqua teal—the cover art for the product had been top of the line, complete with an engraved metal clasp that opened up to reveal an entire, glossy artbook, coupled with a cd of the game’s soundtrack and also—

“Water Emblem’s Special Anniversary Edition?”

“Yes!” he almost shouts. You jump. Kenma quickly gestures to his screen, to your room and your game and points at it with fervor. His eyes are actually shiny, you stare at him, a little in awe. “Do you know what this is?”

“Of course I do!” you say, offended. “I own the game. It’s Water Emblem: Light Dragon! Personally my favorite game in the entire franchise and the game that really got the series into the world market—it’s part of what started its entire cult following. This is the special edition that came out years ago, wow, I can’t believe it’s been so long! I remember waiting in line for it and—”

“That’s exactly it!” Kenma says, throwing his hands up into hair, grabbing it beneath his cap. You blink at him, getting a little excited. “This game—this particular edition re-launched for one night of sales only in the creator’s hometown and here in Tokyo! It came with a companion edition and most people were only able to get one or the other because it was sold on opposite ends of Japan!”

“Yeah!” you say. “I know! I stayed with relatives in the summer and timed it out so I could grab it! They only sold so little copies… that was the best night of my life, I couldn’t believe it, even though the game didn’t seem to do that well at first until later…”

“Because no one respected the greatness of the game back then,” Kenma says bitterly. You nod. “Now everyone knows but the rest of the editions have all either been trashed or are kept by collectors somewhere else, I’ve been searching for years for a copy that was at least still playable, even without the extra goods—”

“But the goods are the best part!” you shout in disbelief. Kenma looks at you like your crazy. “The art book, the soundtrack, the interview with the creator—they all play their part in bringing the game to life!”

“This is what I wanted to discuss with you,” Kenma says seriously, lacing his fingers nervously together and staring you down across the table. You suddenly feel uneasy, unnerved by the piercing, golden gaze.

“You own what might very well be one of the last, in-tact, best kept qualities of this edition in Japan,” Kenma says. “When this edition and its counterpart launched, the second issue, the black one—it came with a playable DLC code that can only be activated when you have its partner code and it unlocks an entirely new, almost never played secret storyline that’s supposed to reveal another part of the story—”

“I heard about that,” you say in disbelief. “But I thought it was just an online rumour because no one ever proved it or could figure out the code…”

“Because no one could figure it out,” Kenma says, getting the loudest you’ve heard him since. You stare at him with wide, round eyes. “But recently because of the work I’ve been doing, I was able to meet with the creator—”

“YOU MET WITH THE CREATOR OF—”

Kenma furiously motions for you to shush. You clasp your hands over your mouth, watching him with round, adoring eyes, sparkling in disbelief. This guy right here in front of you got to meet your hero—the envy and awe collide altogether, rumbling up and—

(Your heart starts to do something a little funny in your chest.)

Who even is this guy?

“He gave me a hint and I was able to find the code in the other edition,” Kenma says, quickly pushing his phone to you to show a picture and you blink, eyes shiny. “Which I currently own because I was able to secure one when it came out in Tokyo. But your edition is the last part I need to unlock the unplayable path.”

This guy… you lean back in your chair, unable to stop the excited tap of your feet. This guy—he loves Water Emblem. He’s crazy for it! I don’t know anyone except people online who like it this much and he’s…

“That’s why,” Kenma coughs suddenly, becoming smaller in his seat. You stare at him with a raised brow. “I needed… to get in touch… with you.”

You blink, remembering the whole reason the two of you were even meeting in the first place.

Your cheeks grow hot, bright red in a flash of rare embarrassment. Kenma’s ears are just as red, but he pretends it’s not even happening, continuing on.

“Why didn’t you just… message me,” you squeak out, feeling more and more mortified that this man has literally paid you thousands just to be here and… it’s not even… a scam. It’s about your favorite thing ever. Water Emblem! “Instead of… my streams…”

“That was the only way I knew how to contact you,” Kenma says, looking a bit defensive. “I told you, I’ve never seen your streams before. One of my viewers told me and you keep everything private, so this felt like my only chance.”

You open your mouth, feeling more and more uncomfortable but Kenma sweeps in, “Keep the money. It… works out better this way anyway.”

You stare at him in confusion.

Kenma taps his phone again, right back at your picture. He stares at you with wide, piercing eyes, leaning across the table and quickly saying, reverent and eager—

“I want to buy your game from you.”

Here, sitting in front of you, is a self-claimed internet game streamer, who wants to buy your… special edition… game?

“You want…” you say, slowly, making sure you don’t have this wrong, “...my game?”

He nods.

You open your mouth. It closes. You open it again, raise a finger, and then press your lips together, staring at him.

“I’m sorry,” you say finally. “What?”

“This might be my only chance ever to play the game,” Kenma continues, pulling up another tab and clicking away at his phone. He tucks a strand of blonde behind his ear and the action is almost endearing to you until the reality of his words slowly starts to creep into the forefront. “I’ve never found another edition like yours, and it seems like it’s in perfect condition too. I’d be willing to buy it at complete full, current market price—”

“Market price?” you say in disbelief. “How much is my game going for?”

Kenma looks at you in blatant disbelief. You raise a critical brow at him.

Wordlessly he turns his phone back over to you and you glance down—

You almost fall out of your chair. Kenma doesn’t look impressed, hunkering back down and taking his phone as you spin, head swirling at the numbers and figures, math flying around in your head at the sudden realization that all that money could literally be yours, that the game you love so much is worth that much, that all that money, all that money you’ve been trying so desperately to scrape for could just—just fall into your lap—

You could pay off all your loans with that kind of money. You could… you could stop streaming with that kind of money, finally wash your hands of it and get back on track and hardly have to worry as you work toward the job of your dreams and…

“I want to buy your game.”

Your heart quiets. The fancy dreams stop. You sit there in the chair, head buzzing with the reality of what he’s asking of you.

He wants to buy your game.

Your game.

And you think then, about a moment far away from this one. About a time when the books and papers crowding around you made you feel like drowning, about lonely summers and arguments bouncing off the rooms around you, and a time where there was nothing else but that loading screen and that game to take you away from all of it…

(The game that you’ve kept all these years, loved all these years, because it…)

“I’d be willing to pay whatever works best for you,” Kenma continues, the excitement is low in his quiet voice and his eyes sparkle as he shows you his phone. “I can even pay upfront in cash, have a fund drawn up or—”

“I’m really sorry.”

It’s the first time in a long time you’ve ever felt the need to apologize to anyone. Not when the whole world has been treating you like the sorry sack for so long.

Kenma glances up. His expression is calm, unreadable, but you get the feeling he can see right through you so you stare at the tabletop instead.

“I don’t know…” you start. “I don’t know if I’ll be able to sell that game to you.”

(He doesn’t seem like a bad guy.)

Anyone that talks about Water Emblem with as much love in his voice as he does can’t be, not at all by your books. His methods of getting to you here today might’ve been outrageous and roundabout, but you’re not really doing things the normal way either, so who are you to judge?

But that game…

You risk a glance up. You stop, staring in surprise when Kenma doesn’t look the slightest bit outraged or tense or anything. He looks just a bit disappointed, but the only thing you really see is understanding and something like a bit of grudging envy, a warmth in his gaze you don’t think is particularly meant for you but still comes through regardless.

“I was,” Kenma admits, a bit quiet. “Worried that would be the case.”

“Do you want,” you start quickly. Kenma looks at you. “Do you want to, uh, see it, at least? Take a look… see if it’s even in the condition you want?”

(You just… you can’t sell it, but you don’t want this conversation to end. It’s been so long since you’ve talked with anyone about this game, it’s felt so long since you talked to anyone in general and…)

Maybe, just maybe.

(You feel a little desperate.)

“Uh,” Kenma says, awkward. “Is that… fine?”

“Well, sure!” you say, hoping you don’t sound too eager. “Of course it isn’t a problem! I mean, I know we just met, but you seem pretty legit and I can just check you out later—plus, I’m perfectly capable of handling myself, even against an—”

You stop, sniffing the air. Kenma doesn’t look bothered, but he rubs the back of his neck.

And you realize, suddenly, you haven’t smelled a single damn thing because Kenma Kozume is—

A beta.

(Oh.)

---- (change the channel) ----

The entire way back to your apartment, Kodzu00, or as you now know him, Kenma Kozume, complains.

He does it quietly, but he still complains.

“We could just take a taxi,” Kenma says, quiet and unhappy when you start making your way toward the train station. “I can pay for it…”

“It’s easy to remember an address but tough to remember a bunch of stations and stops,” you say, ignoring his offer. Kenma follows, unhappy but he still follows. It’s kind of cute.

He walks with a bit of a hunch, you notice. Like he’s doing everything he can to remain out of everyone’s vision, but he watches, careful and observant because he avoids people before they have the chance to bump into him, glancing this way and that and picking things out with particular ease.

Kenma doesn’t look very confident, but he’s comfortable. You stand there beside him on the train, calmly holding onto the railing while he taps away at his phone beside you, sighing every now and then. He’s different, you realize, very different, from what you’ve become accustomed to when it comes to the kinds of people you let surround you for the sake of money.

You almost want to say it’s because he’s a beta, but you feel that’s a disservice in all its entirety. Maybe Kenma will turn out to be a snob of some kind. The guy’s strangely loaded.

You sneak searches on your phone, paling at the articles about him that come up, about stocks and investments and companies and you realize in seconds, this guy is completely and utterly the real deal.

But despite everything, Kenma still does as you ask. He lets you lead as you navigate the string of trains to get back home, doesn’t ask any questions, only comments on the occasional thing, and the entire affair is two hours, but he doesn’t even blink.

Either he really, really wants this game, you think, or he’s just weird.

Quiet, weird, but fairly quaint, and you’re a little alarmed by how much you… like that.

(You’re a weird guy.)

A rude, burly man makes a pass at you on the last train home, breathing down your neck and letting his greasy fingers try to slide against yours on the same railing handle. Kenma makes a face, eyes narrowed into slits in disgust and he quickly looks at you, blinking at your unbothered, nonchalant expression.

His scent wafts over you, thick and uninviting. Alpha. You rub your nose, inhaling your own familiar scent. Kenma looks more and more uncomfortable, shifting from foot to foot, starting to lean your way and scanning for open seats when you calmly turn to the man directly behind you, meeting him dead in the eye.

“Get,” you say calmly, digging your fingernails into his skin, threatening to draw blood—the man stiffens, he pales, surprised, startled by your confrontation— “The fuck away from me before I scream.”

He scurries back, shouldering past people in seconds. A few people shoot him disgusted looks, glancing your way in pity—but you ignore all of them too. They didn’t care seconds ago when they knew what he was doing, if you hadn’t done anything, they wouldn’t have either.

That’s just how it goes.

“Sorry,” you say, even though you probably shouldn’t. You look at Kenma, lips curling a bit. “I was expecting to meet a guy like that today instead of you. I think all that pent up anger and anxiety needed to go somewhere.”

Kenma opens his mouth, closes it, stays quiet for what feels like minutes and then he starts up again.

“You don’t really act the same way you do on your streams, do you?”

“Of course not,” you say. “If I acted like that in real life—no offense to anyone who does though—I’d probably lose my shit.”

Kenma sniffs. He doesn’t say anything after that, and you quaintly let your shoulder brush against his ever other jostle of the train.

(It’s been awhile since you’ve been around anyone. It feels nice.)

---- (change the channel) -----

Kenma balks for a bit at the front door of your apartment, but you quickly usher him inside, kicking your shoes off into the entryway and flying inside. He toes off his own shoes, eyes scanning briefly around the entryway, around your home—it’s neat, he realizes, even if he wasn’t sure what to expect. You keep it clean enough, but there’s bits and pieces where your life slips through, making it feel lived in. You keep plants in the corner, healthy and well but you’ve got a few dishes still sitting in the sink.

He guesses he wasn’t really sure what he was expecting to begin with.

Kenma pauses for a second, rubbing his nose. He looks uncomfortable, eyes flickering around your apartment and back to you, but you’re already steps ahead of him, too excited to pass a chance like this up.

“It’s in my streaming room,” you say, “come on.”

Kenma follows warily behind you.

You almost kick the door to your room open in your haste, unable to stop the ecstatic beating of your heart as you scramble toward the back. Kenma pauses a minute, sniffing the air again. He glances behind him, back toward where your bedroom is left ajar and then to your streaming room. He looks a bit thoughtful for a moment, but quietly keeps it to himself, slipping inside and lightly closing the door politely after him.

(He’s not one to snoop, but he’s here, it’s not like he can’t look.)

Kenma tries very, very carefully not to consider the fact that he had seen you on that screen only a few nights before, and tries even harder not to remember what you’d been doing and how you’d look. He hyper focuses instead on the stand-out merch that becomes very, very clear to him.

He’s almost amazed your users haven’t said anything more about this—maybe it’s because of your camera angle.

Poster after poster of Water Emblem decorates the entire side of your wall. Kenma finds himself instantly drifting up to it, spotting your shelf in record time. He scans the collection of game titles, eyes growing brighter and brighter as he ghosts a finger over the well-kept discs and the old games…

“You play a lot,” Kenma says, quiet, glancing your way.

“I used to be a bit of a shut-in because I had to study,” you say, squatting down beside your other shelf and moving a few books aside. He finds himself watching the way you tuck your hair behind your ear and smile. “They were great breaks for me and helped keep me company. I’m not as social as people think, so it’s nice.”

Kenma considers your words. He looks at you, trying to reconcile the image he’d had of you from your stream with what he’d been witnessing all day today—how different it all was.

(If he’s honest, he’d been expecting to deal with someone different.)

“Do you do PC games too?” he asks. What are you doing?

“I’m not as familiar with them compared to console games,” you admit. “After exams I might try though. Got any to recommend?”

Kenma does. Plenty. He could go on but he doesn’t even know where to start, turning from your games to try to look at you again and think about how strange this entire meeting is, how different from what he’d been expecting. It reminds him of his meeting with Hinata, sudden and vibrant and impossible to categorize, left—

Pleasantly surprised.

“What happened to your chair?”

“What, the pink one?” you glance over your shoulder, noticing where Kenma’s looking toward your streaming station. “I shove it into the closet when I’m not using it. Sometimes the color hurts my eyes.”

Kenma looks at you like you’re crazy.

“...You keep two chairs?”

“Well, the chair’s mostly for looks anyway,” you say. “Some people like that kind of simple stuff. It’s a nice contrast, you know? Sweet and spicy, I guess? My boss said something like that. My ratings are good so I don’t complain.”

Kenma considers your words. He looks at your station, almost engulfed with stacks and stacks of what he can easily recognize as textbooks. Biology, medical tech, chemistry—all of it nearly crushing the fuzzy bunny mask you’d been wearing on the stream.

Kenma takes it all into his head and he looks again at your small back.

“...Do you even like your job?”

“It’s not my job,” you say. “My job is studying and working at the athletics complex to try to help figure out ways to help people stay in shape, take care of themselves and be better. This is just… part-time.”

You pause, staring at your shelves. It feels weird to be saying this outloud, but it’s nice too. It’s refreshing. You think you can take advantage of it anyway, what if you never even meet this guy again? You hardly know him, he probably doesn’t care.

“And I guess,” you say, a bit quieter. “Sometimes it’s kind of rewarding… sometimes people are nice, you know?”

Kenma says nothing, watching your back. You rub your neck and then finally beam, pulling free the reason for all of this.

You cradle the box in your hands. It’s weighty. You run your fingers over it and stand up, turning proudly to Kenma, beaming from ear to ear and—

You almost jump back in surprise, near squeaking. Your ears almost flash red in embarrassment at how close Kenma is all of a sudden, sneaking up right behind you with shiny, adoring eyes as he stares at the box in your hands, looking at it in awe and disbelief.

“Can I see it?” he asks reverently.

Your heart swells in happiness and you eagerly nod, handing it over to him.

Kenma receives the gift with care. He runs his fingers over it, carefully, as though afraid to even leave a single print behind before he pops the metal engraved latch and opens it up.

You and Kenma sigh together in unison, swooning at the sight.

“It’s amazing,” Kenma says.

“I know.”

“I can’t believe I’m seeing it in person.”

“I know!”

“You took great care of it.”

“I—” you flush at the praise, wilting a bit. “I-uh, thanks…”

“Can I see you play it?” Kenma says suddenly, looking almost desperate. You freeze. He looks up at you, expression completely different from his near lifeless one. His face is vibrant and full of excitement, thrumming just under the surface of his nonchalance. “The loading screen even? I—I have to see what it looks like logged in and—”

“I...actually can’t,” you say quietly, embarrassed. Kenma looks confused.

“I… I sold the console for it,” you say, feeling more and more guilty to finally have to admit one of your biggest regrets. Kenma pauses, expression quieting as he looks at you. You stare at the floor, trying not to look at the computer and web camera sitting in the corner. “I needed to buy some stuff… so I had to sell it in. I still kept a lot of the games, thinking I’d buy another one when I got the chance…”

You ruffle the back of your head, trying to quell the stifling scent of embarrassment that tries to escape you. You rub your wrists. Kenma’s eyes are briefly drawn to the action before he looks at you, still holding your game. You bow your head a little. “Um, if you want though, you can take it to your place and see—it absolutely will still work. I can just, take something to make sure you don’t run off or I can just—”

“Do you want to come over and use mine?”

You pause, looking at Kenma, dumbfounded.

Kenma stares right back at you. You can’t read a single inch of his face.

“We can use my place,” Kenma says, calm, unbothered. Your eyes grow round. “I really… really want to see the game in action… it’ll probably be more fun to see you play it anyway first.”

“Is that,” you start, uncharacteristically shy. “...okay?”

Kenma wordlessly nods.

(Your heart does something a little funny. You just write it off as an exaggeration. You’re such a sad sack.)

“Um!” Kenma looks up. You flush, hating how embarrassed you feel, hating how much of your bravado is missing, but you almost stutter out, “I-It’s (L/n) by the way… (L/n) (Y/n)...”

“... okay,” Kenma says. “It’s nice to meet you, (L/n).”

--- (change the chanel) ---

“You know, Kenma,” Kuroo said once, leaning back on the train ride home as Kenma tapped away at the buttons on his console. “For all you say and stuff, you’re pretty good at putting all the pieces together, aren’t you?”

--- (change the chanel) ---

One month.

Non-stop, several days a week, for hours on end—that’s how long the two of you play the game together.

You nearly miss streams, spend hours at Kenma’s house, laughing when you come to find him half-asleep in his sheets, barely rolling out to come greet you and instead just buzzing you in. You think it’s insane—how quickly this… this thing builds. You think you ought to be dreaming, but you don’t really want it to end.

(You’ve gone too long without anyone to laugh like this with.)

You pull late-nighters that are terrible for your complexion, eat take-out like you’re cramming for exams all over again, laughing while Kenma quietly watches and scrolling through Water Emblem merchandise and fan bases and—

You spend time with him. With Kenma. You spend hours and days and what feels like endless forever and fun. It’s so sickeningly amazing you almost don’t believe it’s real. Sometimes you two argue, getting into heated spats over calls on how to move your characters, critiquing each other’s moves and then laughing when the other fails, sometimes it’s outright cheers from you while Kenma nods in satisfaction when you clear another mission and proceed forward and—

You haven’t even been alive that long, but compared to everything else, it almost feels like the best moment of your life.

“I did an entire episode on why moving this character is better than the rest,” Kenma mutters one day beside you. “I’m telling you, we need to deploy them. They’re wasted as an adjutant.”

You pause beside Kenma, blinking at his massive screen. You stare at your hands, and then you look at Kenma, blinking again in realization.

And in all this sudden time you’ve spent with him, you realize you’ve never seen one of his streams.

--- (change the chanel) ---

“Uh, hey everyone, thanks for stopping by again.”

You snort. Kenma doesn’t look the slightest bit at ease, his small face-view camera appearing in the corner of your screen as the old stream starts. It’s only of his earliest ones, the one where he replayed Water Emblem for his channel.

“I like this game a lot… it’s the one I always wanted to do a stream for… so I hope you enjoy it too.”

Is that it, dude? You laugh, shaking your head and kicking your legs out as Kenma gets the loading screen started and adjusts his chair. His camera shakes a bit and everything about the video attests to its age and its novelty. It makes you smile. He must’ve come a long way from these videos to the freaking multi-millionaire he was now.

(He worked hard.)

At first the show starts off rather quiet, maybe a bit awkward. Kenma hardly talks, quietly playing through the beginning sequences of the game and only commenting once or twice on the music or graphics. It’s kind of nice, peaceful, just watching someone go through the familiar motions until the real first part of the game starts and then—

“I never get tired of this part.”

You pause at his voice, glancing to the corner of the screen. Kenma’s eyes glow. He smiles, low, small and quiet, and he leans so far forward, almost out of his seat as he starts to play, quietly talking, describing the things he’s doing, the parts of the game he’s in love with and—

You roll over onto your side, watching the stream. Everytime Kenma mutters something under his breath you laugh, when he flubs you grimace, when he succeeds—you cheer, kicking your heels into the air. It’s really like playing the game all over again—even if the comments say he hardly shows any emotion, you can see it.

Kenma Kozume loves this game.

He loves what he does.

The thought makes you pause, staring quietly at the screen.

The dark corner of your room looks a little bigger. The quietness is a little louder. You lay there in your bed, watching Kenma thank everyone for watching with a sigh, giving the game a second glance, like he’s thinking of playing more even though he said he’d stop and—

Your alarm nearly startles you out of bed. You quickly glance over, shooting up in realization.

“My stream,” you murmur, dropping your phone and hurrying to your video room. “Gotta do… my stream…”

Your eyes glance back to your phone. You stare at the dark screen.

“Do you even like what you do?”

You shake your head, closing the door behind you.

--- (change the chanel) ---

“Thanks again everyone for coming! Your favorite omega is going to be lonely without you~”

The screen clicks, turning off.

You sit there in your plush, bright pink chair. Your open jacket hangs on either side of you, revealing your bikini for the beach theme you were going with today. The video room is near silent, save for the soft, quiet hum of your computer running while your monitor blinks, turning to a save screen.

Your game sits in your lap, carefully cradled by your hands. Off to the side is a thorough stack of medical textbooks you still owe money on. You were planning on studying for your test tomorrow after the stream tonight.

You run your fingers over the amazing edges of the collector’s box. You thumb every part of it, retracing the familiar memories, even the small little dent in the corner when you dropped it the first night you got it and almost cried.

You hold it there in your hands. It feels so, so warm, even though you think that shouldn’t really be possible.

There, in the darkness of your video room you sit. Quiet in the near-silence, head lowered, gently running your fingers over it, again and again.

Kenma’s lulling voice is the only thing you hear, playing over his stream, and you shut your eyes, bringing your knees and the box up to your chest. It jabs your ribs, sits uncomfortable, but you don’t really care.

“Do you even like what you do?”

(What I’m doing now, at least… yeah, I do. I really do.)

--- (change the chanel) ---

(L/n) is typing...

Hey, can we talk?

It’s nothing important, let’s just meet up for dinner if you’re free!

Is that fine?

Kenma is typing...

Yes.

Location sent.

Let’s go here. I’ll make reservations.

Okay! :)

(Y/n) is typing…

(Y/n) stopped typing.

--- (change the chanel) ---

The place Kenma picks is some ridiculously nice looking Japanese Restaurant. It’s dimly lit and elegant and fancier than anything you’re used to, and you’re not really sure why he picks it until he orders for both of you and then the wagyu comes out and you know.

Seeing the steak, knowing you’ll get a good meal—it kind of makes this whole thing a lot easier.

Kenma sits comfortably on the floor right across from you. It’s a small, private room he’s rented out for the both of you. He’s dressed in the usual—baggy sweatshirts and athletic but comfortable joggers, and his hair is pulled back a little more neatly tonight as he pours tea for you and then for himself.

“This smells so good,” you say, mouth watering as you pick up the smooth, fancy wooden chopsticks. “Mind if I start?”

“Go ahead,” Kenma says. He leans back, picking up his spoon to dig into his own soup first. “What did you want to talk about?”

“The game,” you say around a mouthful of wagyu. It melts like butter on your tongue. “I’m going to give it to you.”

Kenma freezes, looking up at you in shock. His spoon clutters back into his bowl.

“What?” Kenma says.

“I’ve thought about it,” you say. “You were right. I don’t even have the console to play it anymore. It kinda just sits, collecting dust. It’s not fair when that game is literally everything.”

Your hands still a bit. You stare at the sizzling hot plate.

“I think you have a lot of fun with your streams,” you say, softer. “I think… I think Water Emblem would be well off in your hands. I think… I think it’s what it deserves, you know?”

Kenma is silent, frozen like a statue in front of you. You continue, lightly tracing a thumb over your other wrist, as though in comfort. Moments like this, you do wish for the chance to scent or be scented by someone again—just something familiar, something warm and nice. Your family is miles away and you just...

“I’ve had too much fun playing it again thanks to you,” you say, warm, full of happiness. Yeah, this is what feels right. “And you never once asked for the money from that night back, even though it should’ve just gone into paying for the game… that’s why I want to just give it to you. You’ve already done too much for me, and it’s more than paid for the game.”

“Hold on,” Kenma says. “I—hold on, one second.” He rushes for his phone, fumbling. You shake your head. “No, hold on—”

“I’ve still got my streams to do,” you say with an awkward laugh. “I can’t spend all my time playing video games again. Once exams come up and then—”

“No,” Kenma tries, looking a bit frustrated. He curses at his phone, “Give me a second to explain before you—”

“I’m doing this,” you say resolutely, standing up from your seat. Kenma balks. “There’s nothing you can do to stop me. Besides, I guess I got to meet you. That’s not so bad. Now stop making this weird and let me just do something cool for once in my life—”

“I want you to do a streaming series with me!”

You stop, staring at Kenma. He holds out his phone, showing the screen to you—but your eyes are on him, round and disbelieving and then—

Your entire face flushes bright red, cherry like a tomato.

“Y-Y-You w-w-w-want to d-d-do a s-stream with me—”

“Not one of yours!” Kenma blurts. You blink. He curses, ruffling his hair roughly before he gestures again with more vigor to his phone, “This—just look at this.”

You glance to Kenma’s phone.

“...you’re doing a new stream series,” you say, eyes widening in awe. “It’s going to be on the secret, never played route for Water Emblem—see! That’s perfect! If you’re going to do that, you need my half of the game and—”

“I want to do it with you.”

You freeze, mouth falling open.

“I’ve been thinking about it since you came over to play,” Kenma says, quietly setting his phone down on the table—he takes on the tone that means business, the calm, lulling one he your hear him use on the phone sometimes to make sure deals are delivered and he gets what he wants. “It’d be a great idea, and it’d be… fun. I’ve been letting you play because I wanted to see if the style would be compatible and I think it’ll be more than fine.”

Kenma taps his phone again.

“Of course, you’d be compensated,” he turns it to you, “we’d split the profits 50/50 from each streaming episode. Considering my normal projected view count and ad revenue, you can expect at least this much.”

You look at the numbers.

Your mouth stays open, knees sinking to the floor.

“If you’re willing,” Kenma says quietly, “to take a break from your streams to do this series with me… I think it would be mutually beneficial.”

Can things really, really work out, just like that?

“Besides,” Kenma says, even quieter. You close your mouth, looking at him in disbelief, in awe, in reverence, and he meets your gaze with his golden one.

“The secret route is meant for dual players,” Kenma says. “Water Emblem is known for being a single player, but what makes it special is it needs two for this route… it… it would be a disservice to the story to do it any other way.”

You can’t help it.

Your scent and pheromones you struggle and try so, so hard to always keep under lock and key explode forth, nearly flooding the entire room. Kenma stiffens, going ramrod straight and grabbing onto the top of his pants as your happiness engulfs the two of you. You’re sure it probably alarms everyone in the hall or anywhere near. Your happiness crashes and lulls and your entire face crumples in disbelief—

“Is it really…” you start, like a whisper, “really okay?”

Kenma shifts in his seat. He pulls at the hood of his sweater, opening his mouth before he quickly closes it. He mutely nods, resolute, and you stand up, lunging across the table to grab his hands. Kenma’s face flushes a bright red, his body stiffening in alarm.

“Kenma!” you say. “Kenma! Kenma, you’re a godsend! A guardian angel! My guardian angel! You don’t understand what this means for me—you don’t know what you’re doing for me—”

“(L/n),” Kenma says, he sounds strained. You pause, looking at him with round eyes. “I’m… excited… but I need you…”

Kenma lets out a slow, ragged breath. “Please… tone it down… just a little…”

You tilt your head in confusion. Your eyes drop down, noticing the sweat beading at the corner of Kenma’s temple, at the hard, rigid look in his hazy, warmly golden eyes and…

A soft scent teases your nose. You pause, blinking in disbelief. No way. You’re crazy, right?

“Um, Kenma,” you say, a little nervous. There’s no way, right? “You’re… you’re a… beta, right?”

Even betas could be sensitive to pheromones. You were being too careless right now, you must’ve just been too much and—

Kenma rigidly shakes his head.

You blink, feeling very, very, very small.

“Alpha,” Kenma exhales, holding his hand to his nose, scrunching in on himself while he peers up blearily at you, eyes swimming with something you’ve never seen once in his gaze before. He sticks his wrist out to you.

“Uh,” you say, hating how nervous you sound. “C-Can… I?”

Kenma wordlessly holds his hand out to you, keeping it in the air. You tentatively step closer for a moment, sniffing lightly. His smell.

Kenma’s scent is so quiet, it’s no wonder you… you never noticed. It’s become so familiar, always felt so calming and subtle and soothing, but if you look for it the way an omega would, pheromones in tune and acute—you do catch it, just the faint hint of something sharp, the familiar, light tang of alpha and—

You quickly pull back. You open your mouth, close it, open it again, and then close it.

“I’m so sorry—”

“You’re fine,” Kenma says, quick and quiet. You mutely nod, mortified. Kenma motions for you to relax as he stands, grabbing his wallet. “I’m going to take care of the bill. Get… fresh air. I’ll be back—”

“You should let me—”

“You can get the next one,” Kenma says. Something in his words makes you strangely complied to listen, ridiculously docile, and you blink in surprise when you sink back to your knees and Kenma’s eyes seem a little warm, a little—

(Pleased?)

“I’ll be right back.”

“Okay!” you say jovially. Kenma nods, leaving you. You can’t believe it. This is it—this is—

The start of something great.

You hold your head in your hands, unable to contain your happiness.

Oh my god.

You stop, blinking again in realization.

BUT I’VE BEEN SUCH AN IDIOT, HE’S BEEN A—THIS WHOLE TIME—HOW RUDE MUST I HAVE—

You fall back into the cushion, kicking your feet up in disbelief.

“Stupid, stupid, stupid—I better apologize over and over—”

--- (change the chanel) ---

Kenma quietly steps out of the private room, sliding the door shut behind him.

He stands there, silent, basking in the faint afterglow, of the leaking, intoxicating feel of your happiness wrapping thickly around him, clinging to his skin.

Kenma lifts his hand up to his nose. He sniffs, once.

Your scent floods him.

Kenma’s tongue lightly drags up the inside of his wrist. He closes his eyes, briefly catching it—the soft, sweet taste of you against his lips, on his tongue. Kenma waits there, inhaling softly before his eyes slide open, thin, golden slits.

This would be the start of a fairly interesting partnership.

Omegachion has signed off!

Thanks for watching!

#typetober #alktypetober #kofi request #ko-fi requests #kenma kozume #omega!reader #kenma x reader #haikyuu reader insert #kenma kozume x reader

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alice-in-wonderart · 4 years ago

Note

Your writing is wonderful! I’m so happy I found your blog 😊 Could I request some nsfw hc’s for lan xichen, jin guangyao and nie huaisang? Like would they rather take care of s/o or be taken care of, who initiates first, etc. Thank you!

I'm sorry for the long wait, sweetie! It really took a while to get to the spice, but worry not, it's here to make our lives a little more interesting. Let the degenerates in us run wild~ P.S. I GET TO WRITE ABOUT JGY AND NHS CJSJXJS YAY I LOVE 'EM BOTH SM. ❤️💕❤️💕❤️💕❤️💕

Lan Xichen

Lan Xichen seems to be the sweeter, more mellow of the Twin Jades, but don't let that fool you. He is a wolf in sheep's clothing through and through. Behind that sweet smile there is an absolute beast. Part of the Lan genes, ig.

While sex isn't exactly the first thing on his mind, he's had his moments of weakness. But when you came into his life, it was a whole other story. Suddenly, he'd feel MUCH too drawn to you, his mind would occasionally wander to you, or rather - what you'd look like, underneath him, spread out on the silks of his bed, moaning his name, as he -

Gosh, he shouldn't be thinking about this in public.

"Everyday is everyday" doesn't exactly describe the humble Zewu-jun's tendencies, but he isn't any less feral. Intimacy with Lan Xichen is like fine wine - the longer the wait, the better the taste. And with his duty as sect leader, said intimacy would less often than any of you would want.

The moment you two are alone and neither is dead tired, he'd make sure to at least hint at what he desires. He'd leave heated kisses along your skin, run his fingers along your thighs, gently sliding under the fabric of your clothes. It would be pretty obvious what message he'd try to get across.

He'd usually prefer to be on top, since pleasuring you would be his number one priority. Besides, having you completely unravel underneath him would give him a sense of completion, of victory. He wouldn't be opposed to tying you up too.

He'd let you take the reigns occsionally, because of one single reason - watching you ride him is a sight he absolutely adores. The idea of you chasing your own orgasm, trying your very best to keep your balance, nails digging into his chest. Just thinking about it makes him harder than a rock.

And gosh, wrap his headband around your neck, or bite down on it and he'd lose his mind. After all - this is the highest form of intimacy, a sight for his eyes alone. You belonged to him, the way he belonged to you. (fking sap)

He may not be the most experimental per se, but he compensates with a dick worth millions and the stamina of an ancient beast. And it wouldn't take much to rile him up for more. He could easily go a few rounds and then some. He'd tire you out to a point of nearly passing out, before breaking a sweat. So much training really pays off.

Don't fuck with a Lan. Actually....fuck a Lan. Totally worth it.

His aftercare would be so sweet. He'd run both of you a nice bath to enjoy, or if it's too late and you're both tired out, he'd snuggle with you, playing with your hair, whispering how much he utterly adores you, before gradually falling asleep.

Jin Guangyao

Jin Guangyao has a specific air of gentle nobility to him, which often leads people to think he's more on the vanilla side of love-making. But boy, oh boy are they all so terribly wrong.

The boy has lived in a brothel. He's seen the difference between love-making and fucking, and he's mastered both. Sex with him is always a game of guessing, an endless array of surprises. One moment he will be kissing along your neck, gently whispering in your ear, the next he will be pounding into you mercilessly, deep and hard, until your legs go numb and you won't be able to walk for days.

He loves to be dominant and absolutely loves the thought of having you at his mercy. No, you're neither a toy, nor a possession, but he'd absolutely want to mark you up as his territory. He'd just do it in places which aren't visible to the public eye. You have dignity after all.

He'd also lowkey enjoy causing you mild pain. He wouldn't go too far, but the occasional slap on the ass, a bitemark turning blue, roughing up your insides, choking, the occasional rope, or even knife. He never goes full blown dom, but say you need him more than anything, that you miss him stretching you out and you're getting addicted to the pleasure and the pain, and he'd be on you in 5 seconds flat.

Speaking of biting, that's a kink he's more than open to admit. He adores leaving marks on that soft skin of yours. He doesn't care if you hide them, as long as you're aware they're there.

The more he trusts you, the more he'd initiate. He has a reputation to keep up, so becoming part of his private life would be difficult. Keep in mind, you have a lot of walls to climb over to get to him, but once you do - my gosh. You two are in bed ready to sleep? One look and you aready know it's gonna be a rough night. You're taking a shower? He's totally going to join and would make sure you help him clean up very thoroughly. Walking down one of the many vacant corridors in Koi Tower? He'd push you against the wall, spread your legs and make you see stars.

His movements are always carefully calculated, too. With that big brain of his he'd memorize each and every sensitive part of your body and use it to his advantage. He'd tease you to a point of begging and then deny your release until you're seconds away from breaking.

The aftercare is utterly phenomenal. He cares about you deeply, so he'd make sure you're feeling your best after one of your many sleepless nights. He'd clean you up, gently caressing any bitemark he's left, whispering sweet nothings in your ears, then dress you up in the finest silk, and depending on the time - either snuggle up with you to fall asleep, or make you some tea and fetch the two of you some breakfast. Who cares he's psychotic when he's literal perfection.

Nie Huaisang

Nie Huaisang is totally demonic and we all know it. Sex is definitely not a new subject for him. After all he owns enough porn to cover half of the Unclean Realm's grounds. And believe me, he's learned quite a bit from it. Though all the porn in the world can't satisfy his needs, thankfully you're there to lend a helping hand.

He's a 100% switch and he owns it. Sometimes he wants to roll around in bed, bratty and needly like a total pillow prince, letting you take him however you like. Other times, he'd spend hours slowly peeling off your clothes, long fingers working wonders between your legs, teasing you and exploring your body, him permanently burning his name onto your heart.

He is pretty experimental, there isn't much he wouldn't be willing to try, but if he doesn't like something, he'll never do it again, periodt. Love-making to him is a form of art and he loves exploring it to its fullest.

Teasing you in public is one of his specialties. Hidden, risqué touches, heated stares behind intricate fans, dirty promises mumbled into the skin of your neck, robes riding up or slipping off, your or his alike. Likewise, doing it in public, or more so - in a close enough vicinity, wouldn't be uncommon either. Quickies are his specialty. He can get you off nearly everywhere and he takes great pride in that. He loves the effect he has on you and how both of you seem a little more disheveled afterwards.

His biggest turn on is oral. He could spend hours buried between your legs, drowning in your desire, making you come so many times you lose sense of reality. That mouth definitely ain't just for talking. And god, does he like it messy. He loves it when you pull on his hair, thrust into his mouth, or squirm from the over-sensitivity. He loves having to pin you down and pull you towards him. He loves feeling your legs on his shoulders, he loves it all so much, he could come from that alone.

And similarly, get on your knees to suck him off and he will turn into absolute putty in your arms. He'll start off all cocky, of course. We're talking about Nie Huaisang after all. "Oh? You want a taste of me that badly? Well who am I to refuse..." But that attitude of his would fade the moment your lips wrap around him. With fingers tangled in your hair and shaky moans escaping his lips, he'd be at your mercy. Deny his release a few times and he might even beg. Might.

Of course, it never just ends with oral, unless there is absolutely no time left for more. Though even then, he'd make some time. Why work, when you have a lover to please.

Nie Huaisang ALWAYS gets hungry afterwards. So, he'd often go and bring the two of you a third of a feast to munch on. You know the cliché, where you light a cigarette after a good lovemaking? He gets food. Any kind of food. And everybody knows, that if Sect Leader Nie barges in with half a ton of food in his arms, chances are, you won't appear until much, MUCH later, a rosy pink on your cheeks and that tell tale gloss in your eyes.

Thank you for reading~

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svtshine · 4 years ago

Text

Unconditionally

pairing: Wonwoo x reader

genre: Angst to fluff, High school!au

type: imagine

extras: Wonwoo edit made by @delicatecy do check their page out! Open to requests ^^

_____________________________________________

Agape

|a•ga•pe•| /n./

1. the highest form of love. Selfless, sacrificial and unconditional love; persists no matter the circumstances

_____________________________________________

Day 1

Wonwoo dragged himself to school and stuffed his hands inside his hoodie pockets, his nose burried under his scarf. He longed to return to his warm bed amidst this cold winter morning. School was restarting and this year he would be attending as a second year student.

He sighed out, watching the cold air turn into white mist around him. There was another thing he dreaded. Maybe not a thing, but a human.

Y/n L/n

You began following him around like a lost puppy sometimes during last march. He never understood why you were so persistent but it annoyed him to no end.

Wonwoo began to hate everything about you. Your irritating smile that greeted him every morning without fail. Your stupid little notes you would slide into his locker telling him to have a nice day. Your voice as you chattered about god knows what. He had never paid any attention to you.

He wanted to be alone. Eat alone, study alone, walk home alone. He just wanted you gone. You were like a pest, a leech that he just couldn’t seem to remove

Wonwoo has shot you down for what seems to be like the hundredth time. Whenever you greet him with a smile, he glared back at you and shoved his locker close making you jump at the loud sound. He would try to purposefully trip you or tease you hurt fully to make you stay away. He even talk bad about you infront of girls hoping you would leave

But you never did. You always greeted him with a smile and talked about homework and stuff. You also prepared or bought lunch for him. Even if he was paired with another girl, you would follow him around

Wonwoo so badly wanted to get rid of you

He closed his locker after getting out his things and was met with the sight of you looking up at him and giving him a big smile. “Hi won, how’s your morning? Have you eaten?”

Wonwoo grunted, picked up his bag and went into the classroom. Thanking the girls that flocked around him would prevent you from coming closer to him.

Forgetting the fact that the teacher assigned you to sit infront of him. He knew you persuaded the teacher to change seats with another classmate. God you were so annoying.

You sat down at your seat and opened up your bag to find the lunchbox you got up early to prepare wonwoo. You weren’t exactly a chef but you wanted to try cooking one whole meal for him. Here wonnie. I prepared all your favourites again” you said hoping he might glance at you once and at least give you an acknowledgment.

Wonwoo paid no attention to you and instead focused on the conversation with some other girls and guys. Your smiled dropped and your heart felt like it received some stabs.

but this was normal

Wonwoo saw your smile drop and turn to face the front. He looked at the lunchbox in front of him. You usually didn’t cook. It was mainly sandwiches or snacks.

He didn’t notice the numerous bandages on your hand.

Day 2

You greeted him again at the lockers. Wonwoo was particularly moody that morning.

“Hi won, did you eat breakfast?” you asked him

“You’re not in the position to ask. Stop being so extra. Seriously just get a life.” He spit out coldly.

You were taken aback. Of course you knew he didn’t like you but he never said anything verbally before.

Wonwoo saw you flinch slightly and for a second he felt guilty. You looked so scared. but to his surprise you smiled brightly at him and replied with an “Okay”

Day 3

“Yah wonwoo, why don’t we prank Y/n” one of the girls asked him

Wonwoo glanced away not liking the sound of it

“You can invite her to a movie and just stand her up. You know like sending a message? She likes you but after this she might just stay away finally” One of the other girls said

Now Wonwoo was interested.

“Just tell her to meet you tomorrow at the entrance of the movie theatre because you have a free ticket”

Wonwoo knew it was a shit move but it might actually make you stay away and stop bothering him

“Fine” shooeing away all the other people before tapping your shoulder.

“Y/n” You smiled excitedly since this was one of the few times he wanted to initiate a small conversation. Wonwoo on the other hand wanted to scrunch his face in disgust at how desperate you looked.

“i have two free tickets to a movie. So tomorrow at 5? outside the theatre?” You bobbed your head up and down.

Wonwoo almost felt bad at how much you were looking forwards to going out with him and even wanted to tell you the truth

But he clenched his fists and put on a small fake smile

This would be his chance to finally get rid of you

Day 4

You greeted Wonwoo per usual.

“So wonwoo, what are we going to watch later?” You waited for his answer as you stood beside his locker

“oh uh” Wonwoo hesitated for a while, “We can decide later”

Luckily for him, the bell rang and the both of you had to return to class.

After school, you rushed back home and found the perfect outfit for the movie.

You took about two hours to find the perfect outfit and reach the theatre on time.

You kept glancing at the watch on your wrist. It was nearly 30 minutes after five and there was no sign of Wonwoo anywhere. However, you never left and continued waiting in case he came late

About 8.10 pm, Wonwoo passed by the theatre towards the library to get some new books. That was when he saw you. The library was opposit the theatre thus it gave him a good view of you

and you wouldn’t be able to spot and follow him

You were blowing into your palms and dressed in an adorable flowery dress. It was getting closer with each hour.

Wonwoo’s glanced at his clock. she’s been waiting her for 5 hours?

He felt bad. He knew how bad of an idea this was but he had never meant to take it that far

But maybe after this she might really leave, won’t she?

He clenched his fists and bit his lip from walking over and telling her the truth

Day 5

As wonwoo took his first few steps into school he mentally thought to himself, in 5, 4, 3, 2,1 and the leech is back.

But he was taken aback when he didn’t hear your cheery voice greeting him good morning. Maybe at the lockers? He convinced himself.

Wonwoo got all of his stuff ready, and prepared himself for your cheery voice greeting him good morning. But as he closed his locker and turned around to where you usually stood, there was no sign of you.

Wonwoo hesitated. Why didn’t he feel happy that you weren’t there anymore?

Why did he feel so empty? like he missed seeing you beside him everyday.

He shook his head and walked to class. Maybe she forgot to catch the train?

Day 8

it’s been 3 days and there was absolutely no sign of you.

Wonwoo twirled his pen around in his hand and stared at the seat infront of him, chin on his hand. Usually he would be able to stare at your hair whenever he was bored, and sure sometimes he’d roll his eyes at how annoying you were.

But now, he sort of missed you.

Wonwoo missed how you would greet him at the lockers in the morning. How you would prepare or buy him lunch. How you always make sure to refill his bottle before and after physical class so that he has enough water to drink.

He couldn’t help but feel the intense guilt from standing you up that day

“Class before we end today’s lesson” the teacher said while packing up his books.

Wonwoo looked up, “Unfortunately, our classmate, Y/n met with a terrible car accident 4 days ago near the theatre. Thus, she’s isn’t going to be able to attend school for a while.”

Wonwoo’s breathing stopped

4 days ago. Near the theatre

He was right there. Watching her wait for him.

The guilt in his chest spread even more. He could’ve done something. Told her the truth. Not fking stand her up?

You’ve done so much for him, and even though he thought you were a nuisance, treated you badly your smile never faltered. You looked out for him unconditionally

Always made sure he was okay before you took care of yourself.

“Once she is allowed visitors” The teacher continued. “i would need a volunteer to pass her school materials and teach her some of the homework”

Wonwoo raised his hand immediately.

Day 11

Wonwoo heard the beeping of the machines wherever he walked in the hospital.

In his hands were your homework over the past one week that you haven’t attended school and a bouquet of flowers. The teacher had informed him your condition had improved greatly over the one week and that he was allowed to visit her.

Finally.

Wonwoo missed you. So damn much. He actually visited your hospital everyday hoping you would be walking downstairs and he would just wait there for a few hours before returning home.

He wasn’t able to catch one sight of you. This was probably how you felt when he stood you up.

Wonwoo finally found your room. He inhaled and exhaled to stop himself for being so nervous. Knocking twice, he heard your soft voice saying it was okay to come in.

He saw you lying on the bed. A book in your hands, your hair in a bun and wearing reading glasses.

You were shocked to the bones. Your parents informed you that the teacher had sent a volunteer to pass you the stuff you missed out in but never in the whole world would you have expected Wonwoo. With flowers as well.

He probably was forced into this.

“Wonwoo, you can just put those down here and leave. I’m sure you were forced into doing this. Thank you” you said gently.

Wonwoo shook his head and sat down on the chair beside you after closing the door

“No”

You tilted your head in confusion. Why wouldn’t he want to leave?

“you’ve always cared for me” Wonwoo spoke

“Greeting me, wishing me a good day, buying or making me lunch, refilling my bottle and even writing down my notes when i fall asleep in class” his voice got less steady with each sentence.

“I’ve never treated you nicely. Always brushed you away, thought you were a nuisance. When you’re the one person who cared for me like no one else.” He looked down. “You always smile at me even if i treat you badly”

You hesitantly took your hand and combed it through his hair, the whole time looking at Wonwoo if he was comfortable with it. But he only nuzzled closer to your palm

“That day, when i invited you to the movies. They asked me to prank you, and thinking selfishly that you would stop bothering me after that, i-i just stood you up”

He took your hands into his. Loving the way it fit perfectly in his palms.

“I’m so sorry Y/n. I’m sorry for not seeing how great you were. For judging your actions and for not caring for you sooner. i got you into this car accident. If i went to the theatre, maybe things would’ve been different. You wouldn’t have had to go through so much pain. All because of me” By now, Wonwoo’s eyes were filled with tears and they fell steadily.

You didn’t say anything, just shifted closer to him and brushed away his tears before smiling brightly at him. “Wonwoo, i forgive you. i’ll always look out for you, you know that. Unconditionally”

Wonwoo felt his heart rate pick up

Day 15

Over the days, you were significantly getting better. Wonwoo visited every single day and brought you snacks that you like. After getting closer this few days, Wonwoo was able to see how great of a person you are.

One day, he was coming into the hospital when he saw you with the children in the reading corner. You read them a book and made sure everyone was engaged. The way you smiled at them, made Wonwoo feel so proud of your kindness.

He would usually see you pushing older residents through the garden and talking to them.

He realised how much he missed of you. How you deserved that much kindness and humility back.

Wonwoo came into your hospital room that one time and you fell asleep waiting for him. You looked so peaceful, so beautiful that Wonwoo couldn’t help but raise his hand and brush away your stray hair before staring at you.

He left a peck on your forehead.

Day 18

You were finally being discharged. The doctors ran some tests and made sure you were completely healed but still had to avoid some physical activities in school.

The whole day the two of you ran to the children’s room and the older residents’s room, handing out snacks and flowers, wishing for their quick recovery.

Everyone hugged you before you left, thanking you for spending time with them.

With the promise that you would return and visit them, you left the hospital, hand in hand with Wonwoo.

Your parents were busy, thus they thanked Wonwoo for helping to see you home.

Wonwoo saw the big smile on your face and finally got up the courage, “So y/n”

you faced him and hummed.

“i was wondering, if, if you know we could come visit them together?” He said, hand in the nape of his neck.

You nodded quickly, happy that he wanted to spend more time with you. You couldn’t contain your excitement and wrapped your arms tightly around him.

Wonwoo carefully twirled you around and chuckled. “and, maybe afterwards, i could really bring you to the movies?”

You nodded, hands on his neck and his on your waist.

“I fell in love with you Y/n L/n, now it’s my turn to take care of you. Unconditionally”

Masterlist

#seventeen #svt #scenario #wonwoo #Jeon wonwoo #Wonwoo x reader #Wonwoo x reader angst #Wonwoo x reader fluff #angst to fluff #School!au #Non-idol!au

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timextoxhajima · 4 years ago

Text

death to 2020

cause fuck 2020 lmao

disclaimer: im usually a really brutally honest person with alot of vulgarities because that’s how strongly i feel about stuff im willing to talk about, so... brace yourself for alot of vulgarities and occasionally a word you wouldn’t understand cause it’s a singaporean vulgarity

now where the FUCK do i start?

i started 2020 really happy, though i was still reeling from the shit relationship i was in for most of 2019. he was a cunt and we broke up in september 2019. i got attached again in feb 2020 to a guy i was seeing from late 2019.

ANYWAY

my tumblr journey began in july (i don’t fkin remember what date it was anymore because it doesn’t matter) and long story short, tumblr has become my escape from reality. as most of you know i’ve been writing since 2014, just never touched this platform until 2016 because i was busy reading smuts WUPS but decided i wanted a more interactive platform with my readers so i ended up here.

ANYWAY X2

below is the list of people i wna thank for making my tumblr journey so much more worthwhile, though we might not be close. i also don’t take note of my moots so im so fucking sorry if i missed you out, seriously just drop me an angry ask and ill bow down at your feet.

ANYWAY X3 LET’S BEGIN

to qiu: @stealerz

for being the little sister but like, my sunbae? LMAO uk how when a younger idol debuts but they meet an older idol that debuts later lmao yeah that’s us. i always find it honorable that you come to me for advice, and while i am known among my friends for giving great advice, i never fucking agreed because more often than not, i don’t follow my OWN advice. so qiu acts like a reminder that hey, maybe i shd stfu and listen to myself. but i really wna thank qiu for keeping me in the circle because im not one to initiate conversations (EVER) and she’s always the one talking to me about sch stuff which actually grounds me? makes me believe that school and my virtual reality can still coincide. thank you for being such an amazing friend, for being a person i actually feel close to because...? proximity? HAHAH but anyways, happy death to 2020, love.

to yu: @lsangyeons

for trusting me so much with whatever you tell me about your life. i’m someone who doesn’t offer trust easily, and even if it does seem like i do, there are alot more things i tend to keep from people about my private life, so i know exactly how it feels to talk to someone you only know online about the things that bug us. your drawings are so fucking amazing and adorable, it’s just endearing to see that hardwork come out in something else besides writing (because that’s all ive been fkin doing lolz). i hope 2021 treats you alot better, because you deserve it. HAPPY DEATH TO 2020.

to bella: @fullsunsays

for also trusting me with your emotional breakdowns (i hope you are alright with me saying this here because you talk about it on your acc every now and then but if you’re uncomfortable just give me a sound out and i’ll get rid of it). i just get so fking flattered because it just feels like you feel safe around me? and that? you treat me like a safe space? ion know it’s just all pretty new to me, about being in this online community. thank you for screaming with me/at me about different things, thank you for being so endearing with my shit, and i hope nothing but a better year for you. happy death to 2020, my love.

to violet: @yunhoiseyecandy

for putting up with my nonsense every now and then and being so accepting to my feral side. i dont know if its because i know you’re an ateez stan and yknow ateez stans are usually more feral than tbz stans (idk i rlly dont) and like, i just find myself screaming to you every now and then and you’d do the same and it gives me ‘a pair of dumb feral bimbo’ vibes so, i dont know what i’d do without you, honestly. sometimes you’re the reminder that i have ateez stuff in my drafts or sitting in my laptop waiting to be published and youre a reminder that half my masterlist is also ateez content LOL. we don’t rlly talk about our private lives much but i definitely appreciate you way more than you think. happy death to 2020, vio.

to gina: @sunlightwoo

for closing the gap so quickly! i earnestly dont remember how we got to be moots and all i remember is you screaming to me about smth and i screamed back and we just clicked from there, ion know LMAO. i love it that you’re so endearing and so patient with my shit and the stuff you write! omg. not many things make my heart flutter and BEST BELIEVE i DIED when i read your eric fic for the 12 days of christmas collab. we don’t rlly know much about our private lives and that’s alright, but i just want you to know that you deserve everything. happy death to 2020, gina!

to daisy: @sangyeon-lee

for confusing the fuck outta me when you switched from a fluffy yunho (??) mydaintydaisy to sangyeon as ur dp and sangyeon lee as ur user i was like ???? who the fuc-- OH. BUT YOU ARE SO FUCKING SWEET like i swear on GOD you are that one friend in the grp of girls that bakes cookies and give hugs and offer sweets and... give more hugs i really can’t uwu. (but now that your dp has changed i might have second thoughts hm). anyhow, we haven’t really interacted much besides in the 12 days of christmas collab gc but i just want you to know that i appreciate you in my notifs SO MUCH and i just hope we have a chance to get closer. happy death to 2020, daisy.

to han @fleurseoul, april @tbzlvr and ri @sunwoowuvbot

for being such amazing readers, for constantly giving me encouragement, for always being my first notes or reblogs and i NEVER miss out on reading your tags like EVER because they are what keeps me going and keeps me motivated to keep writing. like, i really have no words to describe the gratitude i have.

ANYWAY X4

below are the moots in my awareness (because im a fucking idiot ngl) that i appreciate and hope we can get to know each other better uwu

@elcie-chxn @experimentalwrites @ddadadada @chaoticdeobi @atbzkingdom @micaronn (i feel like i have a fuckload more but my goldfish brain cannot handle it lmao)

please send me an angry ask if i’ve missed you out >:(

ANYWAY x5

here’s to a better 2021, here’s to a year that’s not so much of a shitshow. here’s to the death of 2020. PEACE OUT.

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amjustagirl · 4 years ago

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okay im willing to talk ur ear off on why it completely made sense that she took him back... BUT it never actually occurred to me while reading the fic that there’s a possibility she wouldn’t. she was always gonna take him back in my opinion, drawing from what constitutes acceptable mistakes that make up a person and how love can persevere through that. YES the mistakes are there. they’re big and large and red BUT the whole story was working towards forgiveness and growth (in atsumu especially) and him realizing his family is what matters. were his mistakes horrible and reason for divorce? yes. did he realize how much he fucked up? also yes. the decision of taking him back doesnt make reader weak. it actually makes her quite brave, being willing to fight for happiness AND stability (as opposed to stability only if they carried through with the divorce). reader’s character is so good, so complex, and just because she decided to make space for love doesnt mean she’s any less of a badass boss bitch.

hey bee please talk my ear off about it (its embarrassing how happy i am to talk about it, truly LOL ackkk)

I agree, actually. Storm Chaser is, at the heart of it, a story about love and forgiveness and growth - so I knew from the start that the reader was going to forgive Atsumu (fun fact in my other Storm Chaser universe fics - e.g. Broken Compass feat. Sakusa, she’s actually named Kaiyo, forgiveness in Japanese) because he’s changed.

In every scene that Atsumu has when he returns to Japan he’s trying (with varying degrees of success) to prove to her that he can be better, though of course he only truly wins her back when he recognises (a) he’s been so fking selfish, (b) he recognises her choice and say in the matter by signing the divorce papers and (c) he wants to give her her freedom back, as symbolised by the gift of the motorbike and most of all (d) when he’s truly, finally emotionally honest and vulnerable with her.

idk personally? i think the reader was kinda crazy for taking him back because he’s failed her so many times yet...that’s why i included the line - jump off a cliff with me twice - first in chapt 2 when he asks her to marry him, and the second time in chapt 7 when it’s her turn to ask him to take a leap of faith with her. and so in chapt 8 i had to write them slowly grow and learn and love (and i think esp for atsumu, once he knows what he almost lost, he just threw in all he had to prevent that fr ever happening again).

and yes! the reader is really a badass boss bitch and i truly, truly love her so so much. the knife maker’s daughter with a spine of steel who re-forges herself when she breaks :)

i loved hearing your thoughts so so much about it, and thank you again for reading it. if you ever wanna shout at me, feel free!

#amjustagirl #rambles #answers

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gautierprotectionsquad · 4 years ago

Text

Saint and the Sinner by Sam Burns review (contains spoilers)

Book 4 of the Wilde Love series.

I don’t know why i call these reviews. they’re more like reactions. I end up spending a large part of this post angry ranting about Brendan Quinn.

I thought this book might take place around the same time as book 2. At least chapter 1 is a scene that happened in book 2 in Owen’s pov. Also, great chapter title. “Owen Gets a Prologue, Sort Of.” I never mention them but the chapter titles for these books are pretty good. Not so much for book 3 bc book 3 was sad.

I headcanonned Owen as demiromantic and Mickey as demisexual before reading this book. I don’t really headcannon them as that anymore.

I’m glad there’s a barista showing concern for him. I love how this series gives it’s extras so much life within the story. They aren’t just bystanders, they’re people.

Oh wow. Mickey kissed him. Within the first chapter. How long has mickey been harboring those feelings? I do not mind a sex scene in chapter 1. Such a good sex scene.

“I have feelings.” He was terrified for a moment that Owen was saying he had feelings for him, and that would be the end of him. “And I show them all the time. Is that a problem?” Dude are you fking stupid? Owen’s had feelings for you since forever. You knows he’s been into you since he was 13.

wAIT. Mickey just assumed Key knew he was bi? OWEN had to be the one to tell him his brother had no clue? I honestly don’t know who’s stupider, mickey or key. When we first met mickey, liam said he was straight too. Are all his friends just assuming he’s straight bc he was dating Amy or is he just living life as he is but never explicitly saying he’s bi and just assuming his friends would figure it out? Like a part of me thinks he just doesn’t tell his friends stuff.

Also, damn owen. He definitely loves knowing he has that kinda power over mickey’s dick now.

I’m a bit worried that mickey is the guy brendan quinn has in mind as his replacement. Damn just confirmed right after i typed that. fuuuuck.

“You will be okay, O. No matter what, I’ll make sure you’re okay.”

So this is the first book where the conflicts do get in the way of the relationship. Both are dealing with an internalized and some external conflict (mostly mickey) at the prospect of actually being together and Mickey wants to back out. I mean, technically Jake also had the internal conflict of his grief and sexuality preventing him from asking Brian out but that’s not the same. Mickey and Owen have already slept together, but emotional feelings haven’t really been talked about and i don’t think either of them are going to talk about it honestly bc owen doesn’t want to scare mick away and mick doesn’t think he deserves nice things. Book 1 and 2, the lovers decide they like each other and that they want to keep them fairly quickly. Nothing gets in their way or convinces them they should “let them go” or whatever despite things trying to get in their way like an ex or the moral dilemma of dating someone while undercover. Mick, on the other hand, is trying to push Owen away. While trying not to be a dick.

So many romance novel protagonists, when trying to push their loved one away, DO try and succeed in being a dick.

“It had been the most amazing kiss, and the worst thing that had ever happened to Owen. After it, he’d been sure of two things. The first was that Mickey had feelings for him too. The second was that Mickey never intended to kiss him again.” Just like what I said. This type of angst wasn’t in the previous books. It’s like book 1 and 2 were almost identical and then Sam Burns decided to spice it up a bit.

“Or the fact that I hate writing research papers, even though I like doing research.” BITCH FUCKING SAME!

THE ANGST. Dammit Brenden Quinn. Why’d you have to say “you’re the boss.” In front of your son! “Mickey was pretty sure his leg wasn’t what was in danger of getting broken in this mess.” AAAHHH. BRENDEN FUCK YOU. he did it on purpose! HE KNEW. Asshole.

Maybe he just noticed Mick staring longingly, not that Owen loved him back or that they’ve kissed/slept together? He’s still a major asshole, crushing the heart of a guy who is family to him.

What’s the point of being supportive of them being gay if you hate every guy they choose for themselves and are the reason behind almost every breakup?

Mick’s chosen to talk to keegan about his problems. Good but also. God he’s so bad at-Couldn’t have softened the blow a little? Jesus. Key already knew he’s supposed to be the new boss and key’s the best person to talk to about that but the Owen situation. Thank you keegan for giving me a satisfying hilarious response. And telling him what he needed to hear. Love that Keegan is basically like “WOW good for Owen!”

So keegan’s vote is 1) you don’t want to be the boss anyway (so i guess he’s telling him to tell Brendan no?) 2) totally cool with you dating my brother. He’s an adult and can make his own choices. Don’t break it off bc you feel like he deserves better or whatever other stupid exuses you have. I love Keegan.

“For a fraction of a second, there was something that resembled real sadness in the old man’s eyes, but it disappeared almost as soon as he saw it.” So you feel bad now?

“Owen frowned. He wasn’t sure why, but he wanted to get a rise out of her. He wanted her to be angry. It didn’t make sense. Did he want her to be angry with him, or Mickey? “I slept with him.” God, Owen and Mick are so alike.

So Litty’s saying that Mick’s not like his father’s other thugs so Owen shouldn’t be treating him like one? That he shouldn’t be mad at him for working for his father. I think he’s allowed to be a little mad though bc Mick hates it. He’s only doing it bc he feels like he has to, that he has no choice. But i guess Owen has to learn to be ok with the idea that he might be the boss and choose to not care, to love him anyway. The way Joe doesn’t care that Keegan used to be a gangster or that he loves his dad despite the crime. The way Alex chose to love Liam even if he was in the mafia even though he didn’t really have to go through that moral dilemma bc Liam was actually a cop.

“Owen had always thought Mickey was working for his father because he didn’t think he had another choice. Surely, if he was going to be the man in charge, he had to know that he had all the choice. He did. Right?”

Is he going to invite Mick to hawaii with him?

They are both so fucking insecure jesus christ. Especially Mick which is what’s causing all this mess.

Hey mickey? Maybe don’t kiss a boy after you tried to break off any kind of relationship you could have had with him? Mickey should be more considerate of Owen’s emotions. He knows Owen has loved him since he was a teenager and he keeps breaking this poor kid’s heart because he keeps convincing himself he’s not good enough for him while still being too tempted to completely pull away. “You can’t jerk me around like this. Make up your mind, dammit.” YEAH funicking tell him!

“I like people who aren’t afraid of me. Who tell me when I’m being a jackass.”

“You’re being a jackass.”

HAHA! Mickey actually says what he wants!

Ah shit they’re interrupted by the boss. Owen’s going to be so fucking mad when he finds out his dad has been encouraging Mick’s self loathing. Fucker.

Owen’s turn to talk to keegan.

So basically this book’s main conflict is Mick and Brendan’s self hatred. Hey Dudes! GET OVER YOURSELVES!

“And as long as Mickey was around their father every single day, there wasn’t a damn thing Owen could do to shake that hold, he was sure. The old man would call, Mickey would answer, and any progress Owen made would be lost.” So Owen is going to take him to hawaii? Oh. it’s more evil than that. He’s not inviting him. He’s going to trick him into thinking he’s in danger. And Keegan’s going to help.

So despite trying to pull them apart from each other, he can see his son wants mick still. That makes him more of an ass. LET your children BE HAPPY goddammit. No you don’t know what’s best for them. Stop trying to ruin shit for them.

“Going to take him to Europe and lose his passport so he can’t come back to work?” Owen scowled. That was actually kind of clever. He wondered if it would have worked.” pfft.

No, i’m still mad at his dad though. He knew how his son felt about Mick and about the business and encouraged Mick to go deeper into it and acts like it’s ineffable just bc he thinks Mick and him are alike. You told Mick with your own words that you think Owen deserves better. You shut Mick down before he could even ask to date your son. Don’t you think you’re taking part in making him feel unworthy, in making him feel like he can’t be reformed? You knew your son was never going to want anyone else and you still pushed them apart bc you thought you knew better. It’s understandable for Owen to not hate him but I’m going to hate him.

So even though his dad kind of approved of Owen trying to take Mick away and win him over, they’re still going with their plan to trick Mick instead of simply having his dad not force Mick to his side and actually start telling him nice things and start -i don’t know- Stop trying to keep his son away from what he wants. What’s with the talk of him possibly never going to be able to come back home?

Pfft. so literally all he had to do was leave at an odd time and that was enough to freak Mick out? HAHAHAHAHA. I mean everything else is pretty standard and Keegan actually tried to ease his worry by telling him he was going on vacation (which he is). I thought the plan was keegan was going to call pretending to be worried about Owen on his trip, maybe lie and say some russians were there. Nope. What he did was completely normal, he just left at an odd time and took all his favorite stuff on his trip with him (which is...normal?). The only thing off is that he didn’t tell anyone about it. (except he did tell keegan. keegan just didn’t mention that.) Mickey’s such a mother hen for owen. He should have been hired as Owen’s bodyguard. Lord knew, he needed one in school. He did get bullied.

Now i’m thinking of an au where Mick was hired as owen’s bodyguard instead of hired to do errands.

“...Brendan...was watching him with something like curiosity.” so brendon is finally seeing it? The love and care and worry Mick has for his son?

For the first time in his life, Mickey’s patience with Brendan Quinn ran out. “With all due respect, sir, don’t you think Owen is more important than any of that?”

“I didn’t say he wasn’t,” Brendan countered. “Are you telling me that he is to you? More important than your job? Your future?”

Brendan’s testing him. He wants him to put his son before his work. He’s being difficult on purpose. I can understand the “being difficult and disapproving to force their child’s lover to have to prove themselves worthy of their kid” trope but this is different. Brendon’s known Mick for most of his life and encouraged him to go into a path that he knew would taint him when he could have gotten him legitimate work. I feel like it’s unfair. Yeah, Mick needed to learn to tell the old man to fuck off and choose Owen above Brendan but i feel like Brendan was playing unfair.

The classic run to the airport because you realized you’re in love and you’re scared you’re never going to see them again.

I feel like i’m missing the point/not meeting the book where it’s at. The book is leading me somewhere but I’m not following it. I’ve felt it since that “heart to heart” between Owen and his dad. When his dad finally conceded a bit and encouraged Owen to go after what he wants. I’m still holding it against Brendan bc I feel like this conflict is all his fault. I blame Brendan for breaking his son’s heart by giving the empire to someone he knew his son was in love with, knowing how much his son hated the business. But the story is treating it like the conflict is mostly Mick’s fault, which, some of it is, but Mick might not feel as undeserving if it wasn’t for Brendan. If Brendan weren’t so fucking difficult to deal with, there wouldn’t be so much less conflict.

I wish Owen and Mick got to communicate with each other more. I don’t know how close this book is to ending but I’m going to leave this book disappointed if it ends soon bc these idiots spent most of it away from each other and didn’t talk about what they wanted enough. I mean, they had sex, then Mick pushed him away, then owen found out mick was the new boss, then owen avoided him for a while, then mick kissed him and told him what he wanted but owen couldn’t say anything back bc brendan called, then owen went on his trip and mick is following bc he loves him. I didn’t really get to see them spend time with each other that much.

You don’t give something to a poor kid who has never asked for anything in his life and then ask him for 10x more and expect him to not say yes to everything and only agree to what he wants too. Brendan talks about mick’s criminality like it’s who he is and not something brendan forced him to do. Mick never felt like he had a choice in the matter. Brendan built his empire from the ground up bc he wanted it. MICK DOESN’T WANT THIS. He is NOT Brendan! he feels sick to his stomach doing this work and only says yes to you cause you never let him know he could say no. i wanted brendan to feel guilty. Instead he’s probably going to die and the book is going to treat it like it’s all sad and i’m going to be PISSED. Bc you dont get to mold a kid into a criminal than hold that against him when he finally says he WANTS something.

The book is not looking at the full picture it painted. It’s not judging brendan for the choices he’s made. It’s not examining them. It’s not blaming him. It’s a dick move to ask so much from mick and then shut him down before he could even ask to date your son when he has never asked you for anything. And then hold stuff YOU MADE HIM DO against his character. WTF. he only ever asked for something once and you told him to his face that he didn’t deserve it.

Brendan better not die before Mick gets to say to his face that he never wanted any of this. That he only ever worked for him bc he felt like he owed him. That the only thing mick and brendan have in common is a love for family and loyalty and a love for Owen and Keegan.

It’s kind of frustrating the way Owen and Mick talk about Mick continuing to work for Brendan. He doesn’t want to keep working the business bc he actually enjoys it; He just doesn’t think he’s qualified to do anything else. He never got a chance to figure out what he wants to do with his life. He doesn’t like his job. Owen has to keep saying that he’s fine with Mick still working for his dad if he wants-owen isn’t going to force him to quit-but it’s just so frustrating bc this is with the assumption that Mick wants that.

Okay. i just needed to let out my anger. Let’s pretend brendan doesn’t exist or matter or has ever had any affect on the decisions made by mick.

“This was the trip Mickey had talked about taking for years, since he was a kid. And Owen was taking him—had tricked him into it” this is actually really sweet.

God he should have pulled the prank on him pretending he forgot the condoms. I could just imagine the reaction; it would have been so funny!

Since they’ve already been in love with each other before the book started the last words aren’t going to be their first i love you’s in the story like the previous books.

“We could be married. If you wanted.” They both froze. “Mickey?” Owen whispered. “Did you just half-assed ask me to marry you in a swimsuit shop?” “May-be?”

I can’t believe he said marry me before he said i love you.

“Fuck, O, I love you so much.” 7 pages after.

They get to spend a lot of time together thanks to this trip. It’s very cute.

He DOESN’T. He’s just a pessimistic ass who doesn’t say out loud how much he hates it and doesn’t think himself capable of doing anything else. The book’s solution is to have Mick working for Brendan’s legitimate construction company but I don’t think that’s a real answer? The REAL answer would be to give Mick a chance to figure out what he’s passionate about; to finally accept that he’s worthy of getting the things he wants and to not think so lowly of himself. He’s not a poor kid desperate for money and food anymore and hasn’t been for a long time. Plus Keegan and Owen would totally be ok with supporting him financially while he gets the qualifications to do what he wants. He needs to learn that he can ask for and accept help without having to pay anyone back. He’s allowed to want things.

It just feels weird that book 1 was about Alex, who quit law school and got disowned so that he could crash on his friend’s couch with nothing but the clothes on his back and his philosophy textbooks bc he reached for what he was actually passionate about and here we are, the last book in the series, and the topic of Mick trying to find something he’s passionate about isn’t even discussed or explored at all. This book’s conflict is more than just Mick wanting to be with Owen but feeling like he owes Brendan and needs to do what Brendan wants. Wanting to be with Owen but working as a criminal. It’s about Mick not being able to accept any act of kindness without feeling like he has to pay them back tenfold. It’s about him feeling like he’s not allowed to want for anything because he’s already been given more than he thinks he deserves.

yeah he’s accepting a ceo position for brendan’s construction company but does he want that? Or does he just want to work a legal job and he would

have accepted it no matter what it was (except working at Wilde’s bc that would be too easy). Is he accepting it without argument bc he feels like he can ask for this or bc Brendan’s just handing it to him and it’s no different than continuing to say yes to whatever Brendan wants-it’s just now he’s saying no to illegal stuff.

“Plus, if he’s halfway out, it’s not crushing his soul the same way, right?” It’s this shit right here! Mick never says he doesn’t want to work for Brendan bc it’s crushing his soul, because he hates killing, because he doesn’t WANT to, out loud. He says it’s because he doesn’t want to hurt Owen. “I don’t want Owen to get a visit saying I’m not coming home. I don’t want him to see my face all over the news if I get busted and put away. I want him to be happy.” That’s what he says when he’s asked why he wants to quit the business. And it’s really frustrating??? At least Brendan finally acknowledged that Mick and he are not the same, that Brendan would kill his best friend to reach a goal but Mick wouldn’t kill his. Except Mick would rather not kill anyone if he can avoid it.

Anyway we’re close to the end. We’ve got a wedding scene.

“She snorted and rolled her eyes in disgust.“Yeah, but they thought you were straight. So now they just think everybody’s bisexual, especially if they want it to be true.” gross.

“Poor thing was so embarrassed when he started leering at your brother that he apologized to me.” dude

“Holy hell,” Keegan whispered. “You’re really in love with my brother.”\Mickey peered up at him. Was he kidding? In fact, Keegan

looked completely sincere. “Um, duh? I better love him. We’re getting married in, like, five minutes.” asdfghjklkjhgfds

We get a domestic shopping scene and christmas. Mick is happy with the office job he has. And Owen’s still trying to figure out what to do with his degree since no fbi agency would accept him bc of his crime family. Based no that domestic shopping scene and “He didn’t even know who’d done the decorating in the Quinn house. Wilkes, probably. Whoever it was, they’d done a magnificent job.” this, Owen might become an interior decorator? With a criminal justice degree.

Mick to key about jon “You’re dating Mister Rogers.”

“Heh. Mickey’s husband.” same energy as “heh. Wife” - vespa ilkay

“Jon was unreasonably pleased with the personalized monogrammed handkerchiefs that Mickey bought him, and he even had a smile for Brendan when the man told him that his gift was that he hadn’t bought the fed “a damned thing.”

“Owen gave Keegan a copy of the Kama Sutra as a joke, and was horrified when Keegan gave him a satisfied smile, handed it back to him, and told him he already had one.” hold on. “The Kama Sutra is an ancient Indian Sanskrit text on sexuality, eroticism and emotional fulfillment in life. Attributed to Vātsyāyana, the Kama Sutra is neither exclusively nor predominantly a sex manual on sex positions, but written as a guide to the art of living well, the nature of love, finding a life partner, maintaining one's love life, and other aspects pertaining to pleasure-oriented faculties of human life” ok.

Mick never killed jimmy. He mentioned at the beginning of the book that he lied to the old man a lot. This is what he meant. Brendan would order someone dead and he’d find a way to not do that while still making it look like he did what the boss wanted.

Brendan died not from sickness but he got shot on the job. Died trying to do the right thing. Penny, the asshole who kidnapped Alex in the first book, is out of jail and is the new boss of the mafia crime business.

The Quinn family house gets turned into “The Brendan Quinn Shelter for Homeless LGBT Teens.” COOL!

Last words are I love you.

THE END

#long post #romanticsap #sam burns #saint and the sinner #mlm books #lgbt books #romance books #reaction #reviews #reading

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shatteredcrimsondreams · 5 years ago

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Been such a trying 2 days of work my brain is so tired I can’t think anymore. Has anyone experienced office bullying whereby your colleagues are treating you as if you work FOR them and not WITH them? I’m so done with this one particular colleague who’s been throwing all his work at me as if I am his intern just because he feels my work isn’t as important as his 🙄 and I have more bandwidth than him since yea. My job apparently doesn’t solve the company’s problems but his does 😑 mother fking asshole (please overlook my use of profanities because I’m just so done with that dickhead urghhh) So basically he’s in business development/ marketing and I’m legal compliance and that idiot is making me do his marketing research like wtf bruh. I’m so done with all your bs when all you can do is just talk but not walk your damn talk 🤚🏻

So anyway, have been so tired I haven’t found time to play anything the last 2 days. Decided it’s high time I took a break so here I am visiting my boys from Scandal in the Spotlight. I rem there used to be a period whereby I was mad crazy over Revance and I literally bought EVERYTHING from their main stories to all the special stories but never found time to actually read them?

Decided to randomly re-read Kyohei’s story and I must say, I’m really jealous of the MC even though I know it’s fantasy and we should not be comparing. But like, the MC is striving so hard to pursue her dreams and be the best that she can be, so selfless in her love for Kyohei to the point she rather sacrifice herself than cause trouble for him, not to mention she’s so determined and such a hard worker. I really admire her tenacity and determination in life only because I cannot be like that.

I started tearing up (yet again) at the part when the MC was having dinner with the Revance guys and how she made up her mind to protect their peace and happiness in her own way. Okay sidetrack I find it so cute and endearing that Kyohei hates peas hahaha well me too.

I hate peas and put green peppers in my fried rice too p(^_^)q

Okay coming back, for some reason Kyohei’s main story really touched me to my core. The flashback part where the MC was thinking of how hard Kyohei is working towards his dreams was truly a sentimental moment for me. And when she decided to sleep with him so that she can write the best lyrics to convey her love, I truly feel that I cannot compare myself to the MC at all because in reality, there’s no way I will sacrifice so much for anyone or anything. And then Kyohei’s inability to sleep with the MC because he loves her too much and didn’t want their first time to be like this.

Okay my tear ducts cannot stop even just looking at the ss alone is making me so sad. Maybe because I had such a difficult last 2 days all these intense emotions really resonated with me.

Okay Kyohei I won’t go. I’ll stay here tonight with you. Please stay with me always too (//∇//)

Honestly, I really love the character profile of both the MC and Kyohei. The depth of their emotions and love really get to me. This may be fantasy but I personally feel there’s so much to learn from all these otome stories and I truly believe the source of all these stories are from someone’s real life experience, manifested into a world whereby many of us girls don’t have the courage to chase or pursue in reality.

Then again, that’s my personal opinion and it may not be true at all hahaha but maybe because I’m really so emotionally and mentally drained now, Kyohei’s main story is making me so sentimental and dejected. Dejected in the sense that I really want to be like the MC and Kyohei, doing all they can to pursue what they believe instead of forcing myself into a career I hate because this is reality right. A job is a means to an end and we have to do what we hate in order to fund the things that we love (like all our otome games and stories hahaha (=^▽^)σ)

Gawd I’m so miserable right now I hate my job, my boss and that idiot colleague urghhhh.

Okay little Yamada you’re making me cry even more now sigh (T ^ T)

Sorry for all my random rants but I’m serious when I say Kyohei’s story is really good and I’m so glad a 2D guy can actually cheer me up and inspire me so much （╹◡╹）♡

#voltage inc #voltage otome #100恋+#otome #otome romance #scandal in the spotlight #kyohei rikudoh #love 365 #sits kyohei #revance #personal #kukkiwrites

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twinkle-twinkle-not · 7 years ago

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Gakuen Alice: Orange Petal

So I finished reading Gakuen Alice roughly around 1 or 2 years ago and just suddenly wanted to come and read it again since it was really good well not so for the ending because it felt like a cliffhanger *_*

What I want to talk about was where the part they concluded that Mikan has already used up her alice [Nullification Alice] and will have to expel her (this sounds so harsh) and erase her memories.

//I was like, 'what the hell? She saved the school and in return she has no memory of it whatsoever. Well, at least she is still remembered. Heh.//

So what if Mikan still has at least a l i t t l e bit of her [Nullification Alice] and no one knows--even she doesn't know it--and when it was time to erase her memories...

She suppress it with the little remaining power that she has.

.........

......

...

•_•

Well, okay. Little use of her alice can't suppress all of it BUT it can still be effective, am I right? Like holy shit. What if she still remembers but her memory didn't cover up that fact that she was expelled and that Hotaru is still y e t to be found //maybe she won't even remember that Hotaru sacrificed so m u c h for her happiness and Mikan would just think that she will meet Hotaru in time// then Goshima Hijiri <alias Shi-chan//Mikan's "childhood friend"> will be surprised and would try to contact Gakuen Alice but the fucking problem would be is that you c a n ' t c o n t a c t the academy so Goshima will still hide his identity and be a friend.

Bear would be surprised too, of course but will be happy because he's remembered.

Then Mikan, before forgetting any of it once again, writes it on a journal //everything that she remembers// and would be a storyteller to the people in her hometown saying it was like "The Adventures of the Orange Petal!" and people there would say that it was a really good story (though unreal because she still used 'alice' as 'superpowers' which they don't know about and it sounded like Orange Petal was a 'superhero') and spread it to all then a kid (let's just name her Key) in her hometown really loved her story and is actually an alice user too and is about to enroll to Gakuen Alice.

Before going to the academy, Key goes to Mikan's House (Shi-chan is visiting) and asked to tell her the story again because Key was going away to this school for specially talented girls like her. Mikan became sad because it reminded her of Hotaru and asked what school is it then Key would say, 'Mom said I shouldn't tell because it's a secret! But she said that it was similar to the school where 'Orange Petal' has gone to!' (Shi-chan looks over to Mikan watching her reaction, because he's SHOOKT)

So Mikan felt time stopped and smiled at Key. She retells the story in her view (y'know, first person) and Key, thinking it was a new way of telling the story, (with Shi-chan having a shocked face) noticed the ending was a bit off than the feeling she gave off when telling it earlier.

Or at least, the ending was rather new. Which made Shi-chan realize the reason why Mikan remembers.

Key thought it was a sad ending.

Mikan explained that the ending just came in and it wasn't really still an ending so she'll have it fixed when Key 'comes back' again.

Key then goes and enrolls to Gakuen Alice after being told by Mikan that Key should be in good hands because there's a person named 'Narumi-sensei' (which was like Orange Petals' sensei//because it's fking real) in that school.

So there we have it, Key gets to be fast friends in her grade level and there was this one time when Gakuen Alice held a 'storytelling contest' in which when your group wins, all of you can get to live as a special star for a day which made almost everyone was fired up to enter the contest.

Key entered the contest in hope that everyone will hear Mikan's story about 'Orange Petal' and only 5 people including her were left to tell their story on-stage.

She asks her fellow classmates to help her do the visuals which they happily did (for the reward) and Key, thinking that Mikan was Orange Petal in a metaphorical thought because she's in gakuen alice and all, made Mikan's appearance as the one playing as Orange Petal (//using one of her friend's alice)

The judges were Narumi-sensei, Shiki, Kazumi, Noda, and surprisingly, Natsume or maybe Ruka or maybe both (idk. I just thought it would be kinda cool).

So Key breathes in and out and told her story.

Everyone at first thought it was funny and a bit ridiculous.

But the higher levels thought otherwise when Key continued on.

The judges had this seriously priceless face. Natsume and Ruca being the ones with the most shocked faces.

Key was reading on a journal that Mikan wrote when she just came back. Yes, Mikan entrusted it to her in hopes that Key will write in it too. Everyone went quiet and listened diligently.

They knew it too well that it was Mikan's life that Key was telling but they were also wondering who told her that? Even the other parts were something that they didn't know, so how?

Natsume was ready to take Key off the stage and interrogate her. E v e r y o n e was ready to ask her many things.

But the ending was the most surprising to them.

It went like this:

'The school I had gone to became peaceful and my life was full of love because my friends are all smiling happily but that wasn't the only thing. I think I have used up my powers to save many people. It became gone like I didn't have any of it in the first place. I know, there's actually a rule in which I have to go away and they'll erase my memories because I don't have my powers. I had no choice but accept it. My life here in this academy was filled with tears and joy. When I was about to go away, everyone said goodbye to me. I am still wondering why that fire-powered guy haven't recovered, I didn't get to say goodbye to him. He and my best friend Hotaru were the only ones I didn't get to say goodbye to. I am pretty sure that Hotaru was working on her invention so she doesn't have any time to say goodbye. Oh but actually she did sent her regards to me during my sleep. Other than that, I said goodbye to everyone. Surprisingly, everyone came to say goodbye which really touched me. They said that there's a person waiting outside the gate for me so that he can erase my memories of this wonderful school. It was a painful but I had to go. I smiled and said to goodbye to everyone. When I had gone out to the gate, the person was waiting. He had his hand on my forehead and for a moment, I fainted. I woke up and found myself in my home, where I really should be. My grandpa teared up and I thought everything I saw was a dream. But then, I almost forgot about Bear who was inside my luggage. I opened the luggage and he was really there. The tears came rushing in and I hugged my grandpa with Bear in my hand. I concluded that maybe I still had my memories intact? How though? Then I told myself, I think it was because I still had my powers left within me that time and I succeeded in making many of the memory erasing powers off. I know that some of my memories are still forgotten. But I still remember the warmth of my forever friends' smiles. And I won't ever forget that because we will still meet once again and I promised that we will watch the sea together.'

The ending came in with a scene of Mikan smiling happily while writing all of it.

Everyone was quiet after hearing and seeing this.

//you know the drill.

#gakuen alice #mikan sakura #sakura mikan #headcanon #fanfic #retelling #natsume hyuuga #ruka nogi #luca nogi #imsorryijustwantedtodothis #memoryerased

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emperor-lover · 7 years ago

Note

Hello could you please write a minhyun fanfic about him and Y/N being on we got married (and later on starts dating irl?) thank you (ps, i love your minhyun scenarios so much)

omg WGM :o hahaha ngl i was never a big fan of WGM even though two members of one of my favourite groups have been on it, but i tried my best! i’ll write anything fluffy for minhyun lmao Sorry about the wait!

A continuation of this will be up next which is from another anon’s request!!

Hwang Minhyun WGM!AU

ok so lets give you a bit of background to set the scene

you’re an idol, but originally you were going to be an actress except you really liked dancing and singing so your company was like ‘why not both?’ (think female version of Ong)

You became a fixed MC on a music show last year so you’ve been able to meet a lot of people

Popularity-wise, you’re pretty well liked, you’ve never had any scandals or issues

Plus because you’re bi/multilingual so you’ve been able to further expand Hallyu internationally, and yknow everyone loves a bit of patriotism

So this is why you were extremely uncertain about being on WGM

It’s a show that puts you in the spotlight

and kinda tries to brand you with this false image, and if you don’t fit that image the public tend to be like wtf is wrong with you

WGM could be a make or break for the virtual couples who participated on the show

You had heard from other celebrities who had been on WGM about how strange it was, like just the whole concept of a “virtual” relationship wasn’t something you’d ever been too keen on

So you were skeptical and it didnt help that your company hadn’t given you much warning about being on it

They just said to be prepared for the invitation over the next week or so

So when the red mailbox appeared outside your dorm along with a bunch of MBC camera staff you realised they hadn’t been kidding

You had read the letter outloud for the cameras;

“To my soon-to-be virtual wife, our first meeting place will be at the xxxxxx Building tomorrow. Before we meet, I’ll give you a big clue as to who I am, I wonder if you’ll be able to guess! I’m in an idol group, and I’ve debuted twice…I look forward to meeting you~

You read the letter again, absorbing all the information….

“EH? Tomorrow??”

no wonder your manager had been awfully quiet when you had asked her about your schedule

Oh well, guess you gotta prepare for this virtual blind date

Tbh…now that you had accepted the fact that you had to go on this show, you were kinda excited

It’s literally so rare for you to ever get the chance to go on a proper date, even if this counted as a fake/virtual one

——next day—–

You hadn’t slept well the night before, in both fear and anticipation

Hopefully the person you were going to ‘marry’ would be nice

Because your partner was fully in charge of organising this first date, you had decided to prepare a gift for him

Which you found to be super difficult, seeing as you weren’t sure who they were but tbh you had narrowed it down to a couple of possibilities

Like in the pre-meet interview that morning they had asked you if you had any idea who the person could be and you had listed a few names of idols you knew had debuted twice, like mino, or sungwoon or minhyunnnn

but seeing as you knew he’s an idol you decided on little things you knew you found helpful being an idol yourself

You packed a neck pillow, a heat pack, and this really big woollen scarf you had knitted yourself (imagine it’s winter time pls)

Your manager drops you off outside the building and you hop out of the car in this big fluffy sweater and black jeans, completed bundled up and warm

The staff ushered you over to the elevator and you’re left awkwardly and nervously rambling to yourself as they press the buttons to every 2nd floor

The doors open to the second floor and a hotel staff pops their head in and gives you a bouquet of flowers with a note

“You’re here! Today’s the day we finally meet~”

You smiled to yourself, seems like this guy is a bit of a hopeless romantic

The doors to the fourth floor open and sitting on the ground is a little fox plushie doll

You pick it up and attached is another note that says,

“I’ve heard that I resemble a desert fox~”

You froze, no freaking way could it be….

On the sixth floor it was a jar of honey - “My voice is sweet like honey wahhh this is embarrassing >

Your eyes widened. There was no denying who it was now.

WGM had never done something like this before, usually people who went on the show had never previously met or had many interactions, but in your case it would be different

You had met Minhyun before, multiple times in fact

You had been good friends with Aron from NU’EST as well as other English speaking idols and had naturally gotten to know the other boys from NU’EST as well

And although you wouldn’t consider yourself best friends with Minhyun or anything, you had always been able to joke round with him

plus he’s a super cute and super nice guy that was always easy to talk to

Now that you think about it, it’s kinda even more terrifying now that you know who’s waiting for you and the fact you already know him as well??? and he doesnt have a clue who you are???? what if he’s disappointed??? like how awkward would that be, you’d actually die from embarrassment

Finally the doors to the 10th floor open and lo and behold Minhyun is standing there, with his back facing you

When he heard the door open he had immediately tensed up

He was nervous as hell too, poor thing

Like kinda kicking himself for being so cheesy with the whole elevator thing, but y’know, gotta make a strong first impression

He can hear your footsteps approach him and he fights the urge to turn round

The staff signal to you to say something and you become a big stuttering mess, like what are you meant to say???

“uHHhhHH Minhyun, IT’S ME, Y/N”

And he whizzes round so fking fast with his eyes popping out of his head literally everyone is laughing so hard

And he’s bright red because in the pre-interview they had asked him who he’d choose if any idol was able to go on wgm as his partner, and he had said Y/N, and he just assumed that you wouldn’t be on this show and didnt have his hopes up

so the fact you’re actually standing in front of him about to become his virtual wife is so strange but surreal to both of you

so of course, the two of you hit it off right away, seeing as you already know each other

After migrating to a cafe, you thanked him for the gifts and the elevator surprises and gave him the present you prepared

and he loves it so much, and he puts on the scarf you made straight away and is super proud of it

and you kinda just catch up on life with him, and find out how he’s doing in Wanna One

and that night after the filming was over, he sent you a text telling you how he was happy that you were his partner

and you spent the whole night just messaging cute little shy texts back and forth

After a few more days of filming, the first episode was finally broadcasted

And you were anxiously sitting by the tv with your group members trying to gage their reactions

it was embarrassing to see yourself become such a blushing mess in front of Minhyun

It was embarrassing for your friends too though, because no one is used to seeing you all shy like this

Funnily enough, Minhyun was the same in his dorm, and all the W1 boys were teasing him relentlessly

like collectively cringing at the notes he had left for you, and commenting on everything he did

And after the episode finishes, you’re a bit anxious of what the viewers think of it all

but luckily it turns out lots of people tuned in and love it

It seems to be a realistic fantasy(?) of people’s to go from friends to lovers

so with each following episode, the public laps up all the cuteness the two of you just naturally exude

Like they love how both of you were supposedly motae solo (single since birth), and that for both of you this would be the first ‘proper’ relationship

And minhyun has always had Boyfriend goals vibe attached to him

and you were top notch wife material too

You guys become known as the “Royal” couple

every one is like “충성충성” (choongseongchoongseong) I pledge my loyalty to you

So the first time you guys had proper skinship was super natural but cheesy as well

It was a filming by the Han River and you hadn’t worn gloves and it was getting pretty chilly

You had been rubbing your hands together to warm them up and it hadn’t been particularly obvious but Minhyun just reaches over and gently clasps your hand in his and puts it in his pocket

literally at that part though, everyone watching it had squealed

even you had been like omg bf goals

And bit later on when you had moved into the honeymoon house, the two of you would often rest your heads on the other’s shoulder and read books together

One of the most heart pounding days had been the wedding day, because although you knew it wasn’t a legit thing, something about Minhyun wearing a tuxedo and standing there waiting for you to walk towards him had made you feel things

And clearly you had the same effect on him, because he was absolutely speechless when he saw you

That night before heading back to the dorm, it seemed that the something had changed between the two of you

The hug Minhyun had given you had been longer, and gentler, if that was even possible

and he’d brushed the hair away from your face and whispered a string of sweet nothings into your ear before giving you a cute little wave and scampering over to get into his manager’s van

and you weren’t too sure what to think of it, because it’s not like the two of you are properly dating or anything

although it definitely feels like it

You go on lots more dates every week and each one was full of memories

Like you’d gone to movies, but you’d actually fallen asleep and Minhyun had just giggled

“Minhyun, you should’ve woken me up!”

“But you looked cute! i think you drooled tho”

And you’d gone tandem biking, and wandered round different museums, and you went to karaoke together, and Minhyun ended up serenading you with cute af songs

and there was a day that the two of you went shopping to look for gifts for each other, and you ended up getting matching phone charms

There was also the time where there was a special guest episode, where both of you had invited friends round and cooked dinner for them

And everything goes smoothly for the following couple of months, with your relationship only getting closer each day

Until one day a letter arrives, and it’s different from the others so both of you immediately know what it is

A week before the final episode, you started to distance yourself from Minhyun

mainly because both of you have been so shy about your true feelings, despite talking lots and becoming closer, you still have no clue if minhyun actually considers you to be more than a friend

and because you knew it was coming to an end, you’d have to say goodbye anyways so you were trying to let go without having to have your feelings hurt more than they would be

it didn’t feel right though, and Minhyun could tell something was wrong

so he had come up to you and put a hand on your arm just before the crew started filming the final episode to talk to you

“Y/N…are we…okay?”

You glanced up at him and you could see his eyes trying to decipher the expression on your face and as much as it pained for you to say it, you decided it would be the best to break ties now

“Yeah, why wouldn’t we be, we’re friends aren’t we?”

And after you had said that, Minhyun’s face had fallen

Like he was upset that you appeared so nonchalant that the ‘marriage’ would be over and you’d revert back to being just friends

He dropped his hand that was on your arm and nodded, his face hardening and he turned to walk away

A few steps though, and he stopped turning back, eyes meeting yours

“I know this was a virtual marriage, but I was always sincere every moment I spent with you. I just thought I’d tell you that before we started filiming.”

And he walked off towards his waiting room, and left you standing there not too sure what to do anymore

During the filming, you struggled not to cry as Minhyun’s hand held yours

The movie theatre dimmed and started playing all the memories you’d made together

it was making you so emotional, and the sad piano BGM playing did not help at all

so you couldn’t stop the tears from falling when the video cut to a solo shot of Minhyun sending you a video message

“…This marriage may be coming to an end, but I will always treasure all the times and memories we made together…”

Covering a hand over your mouth, you tried not to sob out loud but it ended up sounding like you were having a coughing fit

Minhyun had been quite cold to you after the encounter earlier that day, and hadn’t been particularly affectionate at all, but when he looked over at you, his face went from expressionless to one of alarm when he noticed that your cheeks were stained with tears

he immediately reached over and gently dabbed the tears away with his sleeve and pulled you into his chest

“hey, hey, don’t cry Y/N, it’s alright, babe don’t cry, I’m here for you.”

and this only made you sniffle more

Minhyun’s hand was soothingly patting the back of your head and for a minute you both forgot about the cameras as he pulled back and gently pressed his lips to your forehead

and it was such a touching and emotional moment

until you hiccupped

and Minhyun broke out into laughter his own eyes shining back at you

and you couldn’t help but join in with him in the laughter

you left the set holding hands, still sad but not as emotional as before

and you realised that this would be the last chance for you to say something

“Minhyun?”

He glanced down at you his gaze softening at the sight of your puffy eyes

“This isn’t goodbye right? Just because we’re not on the show anymore doesn’t mean we can’t see each other right?”

Minhyun just kinda looks at you like you’re crazy

“Did you really think that I’d just go on this show with you, the girl that i actually truly like, just to never talk to you again now the show’s over?”

and you were like ?? blinking in confusion…because minhyun actually does like like you, and it’s not one sided like you assumed girl it was so obv tho

He kept talking, “I looked forward to the days when i’d get to see you to film, because spending time with you is like the most natural thing in the world to me. Look I even keep this photo we took in my wallet.”

He shows you a cute little photo of the two of you at the cafe you’d been to on the first date.

“So Y/N? Don’t worry, this won’t be goodbye, you can’t get rid of your virtual husband that easily,” he says shooting finger hearts and winks at you

So, legitimately dating Minhyun is obviously not as open and conspicuous as WGM, but it’s still super cute

and on your first anniversary the two of you go on a late night outing to the cafe where you had your first date

and you buy the same drinks you had on that day and just enjoy each others company, forever grateful that you have Minhyun in your life

I hit 100 followers the other day and I’m so so grateful, thank you to everyone who reads my random little writings, even though I’m definitely still lacking lots! I’m working on the current requests that were sent in, so please hold tight if you’re still waiting~ ❤️❤️

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