#read this month 2018
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sappsorrow · 2 years ago
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ENDLESS LIST OF FAVOURITE HORROR FILMS [1/∞] ANNIHILATION (2018) dir. Alex Garland
I was just looking at the moon. It’s always so weird seeing it like that in the daylight. Like God made a mistake. Left the hall lights on.
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doodoodinklefart · 7 months ago
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i'll turn it into a song
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crescentfool · 9 months ago
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so you want to use OBS
hello! i’ve decided to compile information on my OBS setup and some resources that have helped me along the way.  this is mostly for personal reference, but maybe others can make use of this information!
some notes before i get into it:
i use OBS for both offline recording and (twitch) streaming. any footage i record is edited using DaVinci Resolve 18, which is free.
most of my OBS captures are of video games (through a USB capture card, specifically elgato), and the occasional screen/application capture (like clip studio paint, and sometimes PC games).
as such, the information here is reflective of these experiences. this post is not comprehensive to all of OBS’s features- this is just an overview of the settings and configurations that are most relevant to me.
with that out of the way, all the information will be under the cut!
Basic Setup
file format:
how to change: settings -> output -> recording -> recording format -> press “apply” once finished!
I save most of my recordings as .mkv files- it supports multi-track audio! i prefer .mkv over .mp4 because if your power goes out, you still have a recording to work with. 
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.mkv files can be read by DaVinci Resolve without an issue- but for Adobe software, they'll need to be remuxed to .mp4 within OBS! (file -> remux recordings -> press the … to select a file -> press the “remux” button)
video resolution and framerate:
how to change: settings -> video -> output (scaled) resolution
my obs canvas is @ 1920 x 1080p (16:9)
i switch between 720p and 1080p as needed! if you're concerned about space, you can probably just go for 720p. i also record at 30 fps, simply because that’s what my capture card supports.
video bitrate:
how to change: settings -> output -> encoder settings (located in both the streaming and recording tab) -> press “apply” once finished!
bitrate is a bit of a doozy to explain, but the most important thing to know is that bitrate affects your video’s quality. lower numbers = lower quality, while higher numbers = higher quality. 
generally speaking, you'll want higher bitrate when you're recording things with high depth of information (e.g. you’d want a higher bitrate for something fast-paced like splatoon, compared to a slower-paced game like animal crossing).
my video bitrate is either set to 3000 or 4000 kbps! and here's some of my other (related) settings while i'm at it:
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you can put your bitrate at much higher values than me if you're a stickler for quality- but keep in mind that a higher bitrate means:
bigger file size
more information to upload (when streaming)
your computer will need to encode more
i’d recommend reading twitch’s guidelines on encoding, bitrate, resolution, and framerate to get an idea of what values to pick. for people who are doing offline recording or streaming on a different platform, i suggest googling the appropriate resources!
multi-track audio:
this is mostly applicable to anyone looking to do video editing!
multi-track audio basically allows you to separate your audio sources (e.g. discord, game audio, and your own microphone) into different tracks. 
this is an immensely helpful tool because it lets you adjust audio levels in post-production (editing). some examples of how this can be used:
increasing someones microphone volume if they speak too softly
increasing/decreasing game audio
muting swear words/sensitive information
completely muting voice call + microphone if you want to upload a no commentary video
and more!
to set this up, take a look at your audio mixer panel, and press the ⚙ icon. this will bring up advanced audio properties.
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by checkmarking a track box, it puts the audio on that track. to make the above screenshot easier to digest:
track 1 consists of ALL three audio sources- desktop, elgato, and microphone.
track 2 only has the microphone audio.
track 3 only has desktop audio (i use this for voice calls)
track 4 only has the elgato capture card audio (game audio). the volume has also been lowered so that any speaking voices can be heard clearly.
tracks 5 and 6 are unused.
you might be wondering, “why do all three of these have 1 checked off?” this is what i call the universal audio track. i recommend having a universal audio track for a few reasons:
when you stream from OBS onto twitch/youtube- you have to select ONE audio track.
it’s also a nice backup in case you didn’t separate your audio correctly.
if for whatever reason you need to move around your individual audio tracks in editing, the universal track acts as a nice reference point.
mark off your audio tracks for each audio source as you see fit! once you’re finished with the advanced audio properties, go to settings > output.
for the streaming tab, you’ll want to have the number of your universal audio track selected. in my case, that will be audio track 1.
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for the recording tab, checkmark all the audio tracks that are applicable to you (in my case, audio tracks 1, 2, 3, and 4). by default, only audio track 1 is selected.
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if you don’t check off the additional audio tracks in the output > recordings section, you will not have access to those audio tracks in editing, and you won’t be able to edit your audio tracks independently of each other. so don’t forget to do this! 👍
custom browser docks
custom browser docks are a great tool for when you’re streaming and want to have access to your twitch chat and/or activity feed! (or if you wanted to have some other web browser on OBS).
to create one, go to docks -> custom browser docks.
you’ll be given a table interface that asks you to put the dock name and URL. for streamers who want to have chat and alerts available, do the following:
on twitch’s homepage, go to the upper right and click your icon
then, click creator dashboard
once you’re on your dashboard, go to stream manager
click the vertical “...” on my chat OR activity feed.
press “pop-out chat” OR “pop-out activity feed”
copy and paste the link into the table back into OBS
press apply once you’re done
click and drag the docks around at your leisure to put them where you like!
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if you ever decide you don’t want to have something on your OBS dock (or want to bring something back), go to the toolbar, click “docks,” and click the appropriate dock!
third party things
a section of optional things that you may enjoy having.
streamlabs alerts
this is basically for anyone who streams and wants to have their chat and/or follower notifications visualized on screen!
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streamlab alerts can be added to OBS by adding a browser source into your scene, and the specifics can be customized on streamlabs itself. it’s pretty self-explanatory, so i’ll just leave a link to streamlabs website, where you can log in using the streaming platform of your choice: https://streamlabs.com/
discord overlay
this is a browser source that can be set up to show people who are in a server's voice chat and who speaks. i recommend this to people who make multiplayer content- it can help viewers distinguish who is who but also it can be helpful in editing.
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to set this up, go to https://streamkit.discord.com/overlay, click “install for OBS,” and after logging in with discord, go to “voice widget” and click the server and voice channel you want.
you are able to apply CSS if you'd like more control over the visuals, but the standard layout tends to work fine for me! a search of “discord overlay css” on youtube can help you get more information.
veadotube mini
this is a pngtuber software that a friend recommended to me! no webcam is required- mouth opening and closing is based on your microphone input!
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you can download it here (it’s pay what you want!): https://olmewe.itch.io/veadotube-mini
for a proper tutorial on how to use it, i recommend checking out the app's documentation, which you can read here: https://veado.tube/help/
source record
have you ever wanted to stream something with a chat overlay/layout, but wanted your recording to ONLY be the gameplay? or maybe you wanted to record BOTH your gameplay AND your webcam so that you can have a crisp zoom-in on your webcam!
source record is a third party plugin that can help you with that!
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the general gist of source record involves applying the “source record” filter on either a scene or source, and customizing the encoding settings accordingly. the exact details of how to set it up is beyond the scope of this post, so I'll just direct people to this video instead (it was very helpful to me):
youtube
⚠ a quick note about source record: this plugin can be intense for your computer. be sure to do test recordings and the like to see what your computer can handle (and see if the recordings come out the way you like). it took me a few tests before i settled onto something i liked!
you can download and install source record here: https://obsproject.com/forum/resources/source-record.1285/
vdo.ninja
have you ever wanted to do a collaborative video or stream where you feature someone else’s video on your stream? or maybe you’re doing a multi-person streaming event! vdo.ninja is the perfect tool for you!
vdo.ninja turns your OBS virtual camera into a browser source link- which your collaborator can add on their stream! this is a new tool that i’ve added to my arsenal recently- since my friend and i are planning to stream a side order challenge together! i’ve still got to iron it out a bit more, but i like what i’ve used of it so far.
try it out for yourself at their website here (with documentation and demos available on the homepage!): https://vdo.ninja/ (no downloads required!)
ok! i’m set up! what now?
and with that, that’s all of the settings and tools that i thought would be worth mentioning! while most of my setup was written with video games in mind, some of these plugins and setups may be applicable to other types of videos (e.g. tabletop gaming with a physical camera)!
now that i’ve outlined all these settings, i have one more thing i have to say: regardless of what you're using OBS for, do a test recording before doing anything “official” with it. this recording can be as short as 30 seconds. it’s a good habit to develop that can make sure your streams/recordings turn out the way you want them to!
here are the kinds of things i like to check! it’s not an exhaustive list, but this can be a starting point:
video:
does my video look the way i want it to (and can my computer handle that)?
can my computer handle the load of encoding? - OBS will note in the bottom if the encoding is overloaded. if it can’t handle it, turn down your bitrate or adjust other encoding settings (e.g. i had to toggle psycho visual tuning OFF because it was causing lag)
this is especially the case if you're recording PC games- you don’t want to have slowdown on either your game or the recording!
audio:
are my audio sources (e.g. desktop audio and microphone) correct? - if you plug/unplug devices a lot, be sure to check this (settings -> audio).
are any of my audio sources muted? - make sure you don’t have anything on 🔇 if you don’t want it to be muted! otherwise the audio will be lost forever… (i lost my friend’s VC audio once… it was sad)
are my audio tracks separated properly? - requires you to boot up your editing software, but it's worth doing! for the test recording, just have something from all your sources playing at once, and see if your editor has things separated into tracks.
can i hear the voices clearly? or does the music and/or game overpower them?
if for whatever reason your OBS crashes, or you want more information on anything “critical” or “warning” worthy in your set-up, you can go to help > log files > upload current log file > analyze. crash logs currently can’t be analyzed by the log analyzer- but they’re a valuable tool when asking for help on the OBS forums!
and that’s all! for real, this time. i hope that some of these tools and settings can help anyone wanting to get more out of OBS. there’s definitely other things i didn’t touch upon (e.g. audio filters for noise compression, suppression, etc.), so i suggest doing your own research and trying things out!
happy recording/streaming, and thanks for reading! ✨
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icewindandboringhorror · 7 months ago
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boy in silly sitting positions compilation
#cats#I especially like the last one where he just has one single paw poking out of that box for some reason lol#I still have costumes to post and like a billion other things.... grr... constantly failing at staying active on social media aughh#I think because currently my Main Focus is on trying to get my game done and stuff.. which basically just means sitting and writing all day#so there's not much to post about. Though I know the Good At Social Media thing to do would be to post about the#writing and share progress and talk about the game and characters or whatever to try to build interest or something but that is SOOO weird#to me.. I could maybe get it if it was like a tiny tiny discord groupchat of playtesters with like 5 people in#it.. But something about talking openly about things before they happen is weird to me?? Like presumptuous feeling or something#''oooo guess whats gonna happen LATER!!!'' like.. how do you know.. what if it doesnt. what if you dont finish it. what if its not the way#you think it's going to be. what if something changes. etc. Like I literally avoid movie trailers and game trailers for the same reason ghj#Even if it's not ME doing it it just feels... weird.. Maybe it has to do with my OCD and how I just don't like talking about ''future''#things in Certain Terms. Like if I was going to say ''Oh yeah sure. come over to my house in a few months''. I would have to follow it up#with like ''HOPEFULLY you can come over to my house in a few months'' or 'They'll come over in a few months MOST LIKELY''. Because just#stating that something will happen matter of factly takes for granted like.. what if somehting horrible happens and I DONT have a house#in a few months? or what if something bad happens to me. or to the person coming over? I can't ever DEFINITELY say with 100% certainty#that one could ACTUALLY come to my house in a few months. anything could change. So I have to allot for that in my phrasing. hbjjkn#There are a lot of situations where you're expected to just Assume Things but for some reason that bothers me. My brain literally does not#even Assume the most basic things.. like how do *I* know that just because it's someones birthday that they want to be wished a happy#birthday? what if they dont? everyone is different and has different preferences. I should check with them first. or wait until they public#ly announce that theyre accepting birthday wishes. I have to allot for all 5034859069 rare possibilities at any given time and never take#anything for certain. etc. ghjbjhbh.... ANYWAY.. I have been feeling a bit sick lately as usual.. but still slowly making progress on some#things. Moslty I need to edit costume photos. make sculptures. and work on the game. Going back reading some of the old writing from like#2018 and suprisingly I don't have to change that much of it? In fact I like it mostly. so that's good. I would be very interested if I were#playing the game myself. Though that doesnt mean much since my tastes are so niche lol..#Still really want to clear some of my million tumblr drafts as well... alas and aughh and ooughh and so on and so forth. Between all of my#evil appointments other such things...why cant I have one billion dollar to retire into relaxed hermit artist life of no stressors.. bleas
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wuxian-vs-wangji · 2 months ago
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Every time Prapai gives Sky medicine, he's narcoleptic inside 5 minutes.
#fun story: in 2018 we went to interview ex-president jimmy carter#and I had a bit of an odd feeling in my throat#august 24 2018 i remember that date well#because that was the first signs of an illness that annihilated me#i blacked out for most of the month of september- i only have very sparse memories#i had a strange kind of pneumonia the doctor hadn't seen before#and over those 6-7 months they threw every single anti-anything they could at me#IDK if I slept so well because of the knockout effects of all the antibiotics and antivirals#or because I had a recurring fever and a chronic brutal cough for 6-7 months and was terribly weak by the end#but i was sleeping so deeply the more pills they added#and now i know i can function with a 102 fever on and off for months on end#everyone- family and coworkers- also made fun of me for insisting on wearing a mask but guess what bitches#when the pandemic rolled around i still had 2 unopened boxes from being sick a year before and those were worth more than toilet paper#lita#love in the air#prapai#sky#prapaisky#true facts: I don't remember writing one of my own fics#it was during the blackout month and i refuse to read it because i think it's funnier that i don't know what it's about#i also had to work- it was one of our biggest events that we do every 4 years#two weeks straight of 14 hour days with no weekends#and i was there every single day#i have no memory whatsoever and when we did the event again in 2022 the organizers kept saying 'oh wow you're alive!'#i like to say i had the BEST time because it's a tedious af event and everyone is surly by the end#but from MY pov i was trapped in dense fog and couldn't breathe; trapped in that twilight feeling when you're neither awake nor unconscious#and then when it passed I had a nice paycheck in my account without any of the mental strain of working for it
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blizzardfluffykpop · 3 months ago
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alright~ a few updates about everything! so this weekend I'll be seeing changkyun in chicago- so I prolly won't be posting until after I'm alive again from that 😂😅 (I am vv excited about it- I just know I'll be vv tired when I return home). Anyways, I have a few fics in the works~ one of them that is a request 🤭 I'm vv excited to work on them! But I think I'm going to change my masterlist a bit when I come back. I'm going to retire a few groups from the main masterlist and I've been debating for the past year about it... But I think I'm going to add a yearly masterlist- So it would go from most recent to the beginning of this year~
I'm also thinking about changing my pfp- I haven't been really into stray kids for uh... years- But I will be sure to make an update about that if I go thru with that too- (It may be ji changmin next 🫣🤭)
Anyways those are my few updates 🥰💖
#in general my brain is so muddled outside of talking to my three closest and my mom i'm just... fogged- but god how i want to be#writing rn- i have 4 smuts and 1 fluff in the works (who would have guessed my fluff writer self has moved from not only plain fluff to#angst & smut this year? not me- but i'm happy about it) two are poly aus and the other two are about a certain 🌙~#kate rambles on from here#altho there is another vv big potential fic~ but i'm only counting ones i have lots of progress on-#and then the masterlist thing i've been thinking about forever- hwvr again i do not know if i'll have the energy bc i might be knocked#on my ass for another month after this trip (i'll be pretty much solely driving for 4 & 1/2 hrs there and another 4 & 1/2 back the next day#but the pfp thing has been on my mind for a while too- again idk when i'll get around to it but jinkoh has given me a vv good#idea esp for winter~ with mr. ji~ so i'm sure to have changed it by december~ (unless the change is too much for me- i haven't changed it#since 2018... so i'm kind of attached to it- even tho i don't even bias him or stan the group anymore...)#anyways this is full of me rambling- i could really go on tbh- bc i'm really trying to get my mind into gear- but these are my updates#let's see if i fulfill em- i'm bound to fill the fic ones- but the other two... yeah- we'll see-#kate rambles#blog updates#should i bring babydoll q & juyo to the concert bc if it wasn't for kyun getting me into dominic fike(and being into tbz during stealer era#i wouldn't have been a tbz ult... (outside of some other factors i haven't really disclosed) bc atp i'm vv close to packing them with me#i mean tbh a tbz pc was going- but now i'm 🫣: should i bring them to see the guy from my first ult group that caused the spiral-#that made me get into my newest ult group? (i love this butterfly effect more than i could ever express tbh- even tho i express it often)#anyways if someone actually reads these- i'm bound to bring babydoll q- legally that's my buddy- but juyo?? 👀
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ranseur · 2 months ago
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I- fucking.. i never realized i could download and organize fics
I feel stupid now
Never used any app cause ao3's website is amazing and i love it but I CAN DOWNLOAD AND ORGANIZE FICS?? WHAAAT
this is so stupid cause i already have a few downloaded fics i just haven't thought about doing it for more
noo don't feel stupid! but i hope you find that an app boosts your quality of life the app i use on android is called ReadEra. i haven't tested or compared other apps, but i like this one because the UI is so unobtrusive, customizable, and intuitive. tap right/left or top/bottom for page flip, tap middle to hide/show UI, swipe left side to decrease/increase brightness, tap top right to make a bookmark or edit one, top left to swap between two chosen visual themes (i use dark vs darker, but there is light theme and 'paper' offwhite too), if i browse my collection or author list it will keep me in the author and collection i'm 'in' until i back out myself, etc etc i really love how easy this app is to use. the only ad i get is the occasional prompt to go premium but it doesn't impede my reading experience but it could be true that any old app will do all this- find what works for you! enjoy!
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eggmeralda · 9 days ago
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that period of time between south park post covid being announced in 2021 to summer 2022 when everyone got obsessed with truffula flu was moderately heavenly
#i'm going through all my chronological memory hoarding playlists from late 2013 to now#taken all day but i'm currently on around june 2022 and it's so nostalgic#but like that entire time was unreal#never forget south park post covid announcement literally curing me of like 2 years worth of on and off depression#i was like still weakly crawling out of the abyss and then adult scientist philanthropist kenny jsut yanked me out of there so easily#no warning#and then i was fine. it was so funny to me like i was in the middle of my eateot induced existential crisis where i couldn't sleep and then#everything was just normal? literally whatever episode of my life i was in had ended and everything reset for the next episode#which was such a good episode as well. and then the tflu era??#reading every existing camp entre blog within a month#and then the swag and bitter archives. literally the summer of all time#not just for that i mean it was just a good summer anyway#the only logical direction for life to go in after that was down bc i'd literally peaked for about 8 months#but it was a good time while it lasted#this was meant to be a happy ''remember the good times'' post but how come i'm only allowed to be happy for like a year at most#but i'm allowed to be in the abyss for 2 years#hopefully not longer bc i'm only now just getting over the cursed half of 2022 that doesn't exist to me (sep-dec)#but like. 2015 and first part of 2016 good. 2016-2018 bad#end of 2018 and most of 2019 good. end of 2019-summer 2021 bad#end of 2021-summer 2022 good. end of 2022-now bad#the maths does not add up#anyway shoutout november 2021-july 2022 i love you soooooooo much you were so sexy <3#(apart from the agoraphobia but that was part of the fun)#(like i'd be out in public and i'd see a pic of entre on my phone and i guess too much serotonin would be released in my brain and i'd get#anxiety and have to go home and i couldn't eat in public and i basically couldn't leave the house)#(because i was too obsessed with tflu)#(that wasn't the main reason it was mostly a wild fear of food poisoning from anything. but tflu didn't help and that is so cool of it)#(truly an iconic time. okay stop talking)#ramble
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dramaticals · 10 months ago
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reading the caraval series is really bringing me back to my YA-obsessed days and i'm finding so much comfort in it 🥹
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ellies-enrichment · 1 year ago
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i can't believe i made so many text posts and my queue is still empty 2 days later does it not know i had a headache and needed it to keep going with new exciting posts that i haven't made because my head hurt
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bethanyeliseart · 1 year ago
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Matchstick 💫
Mixed media: watercolor, pen, craft paper from Michael's (constellation design) for the top half of the background, and a little bit of acrylic paint!
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icewindandboringhorror · 4 months ago
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Lineup of all of the characters that appear long enough to need a visual representation of them in the game lol
#I added a few people that you can randomly run into around town (like at the inn or in the forest or etc) and have very short conversations#with just to kind of flesh out the world a little more in a more natural-ish seeming way. Like nobody in the main cast would really#have much reason to talk about the actual city you're in or anything. Since most of them havent lived there that long anyway.#But if there's a ''city inspector'' that you can run into whilst he's writing up notes examining the local inn. then maybe there could be a#few dialogue options with him where you can ask about things like that. since he would know more about the area as an offical Government#Worker or etc. Optional of course. since I have to be so wary of my natural inclination to lore dump lol and am trying extra hard to make i#all stuff thats easily avoided/skipped. But for the people like ME who deliberately choose to exhaust every possible optional dialogue#option and explore every single inch of the world and try to collect as much information as possible - then there are a few extra places to#do that. Though obviously not all of them just give exposition for like 15 paragraphs blandly. Some you don't really learn anything from#and it's kind of just.. random flavor to make the non-shop map locations more ''lived in'' feeling. Like the random#little girl you can talk to in the park doesn't bizarrely start reading out the wikipedia description of some War that happened 10 years ag#or whatever. she's just complains about school a little and asks if you've tried the nearby ice cream cart treats and etc lol#ANYWAY..#some of the art is so so evil but I'm not going to spend 800 years trying to clean it up and update it. whatever the hell mess I sketched#out in 2018 or whatever is just what I'm keeping lol... it is what it is#One of the many trials of the whole 'briefly work a few months on something and then abandon it almost entirely only to pick up work#on it literally like 4 - 5 yrs later and now you must contend with trying to decipher whatever weird shit you did years ago' experience lol#Also given the population breakdowns of the world in general I think there's an unrealistic amount of jhevona in this lineup since#they're a much rarer species to just see out and about anywhere but.. it IS a global trading center type area. and the game#takes place in the north (the country of Asen. near the coast. for the maybe 2 or less people who actually keep up with my worldbuilding#enough to know where that is lol (the same continent as Navyete (where the avirre'thel live)) and there's a decent concentration#of nothern jhevona only a short ways away so... tee hee..I shall pretend it makes sense and not merely me just wanting#to represent more of that species because I think their lore is interesting lol#I MEAN also realistically there would NOT be a human here because humans are extremely isolated species that don't even know the rest#of the world exists really and human territories are extremely protected from the outside world but... of course it's like.. well we need#at least One of them to be there for the Optional Lore. Same with the Ythrili. But at least those are like.. PLAUSIBLE.. not nonsensically#outlandish. If I had a Verrucalt or something in there THEN that would be truly lore-breaking almost lol#ANYWAY.. rambling that only means anything to me because nobody else knows what I'm even referencing but hbjh#also I think my character designs are so funny in the sense that I really do just love to do the same thing over and over again ghbjh#wow... random asymmetry and belts and arm straps and high collars where the neck is completely covered?? you dont say..how novel
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britneyshakespeare · 1 year ago
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last night i started rereading david copperfield. i've read so much new literature this year, i wouldn't say im "burnt out" but i feel like im cycling through things so fast that i... i dont know. i dont feel like i get to have them melt into me as satisfyingly as they used to although that might also be a product of how i feel about my overall *life* right now, idk. deep stuff but anyway.
i havent read a novel in almost four years. i have been too ashamed to pick them back up and i left off in the middle of the professor by charlotte bronte, which i always felt ashamed for being unable to finish. someday ill reread the beginning and finish it, but yadda yadda yadda i hate that nagging feeling that i HAVE to do something. reading should not feel like a chore. which is also how ive felt about my reading plays at such a quick rate this year. not that its a CHORE, like im not enjoying it, but like it's a daily task im distracting myself with to get some temporary pleasure and im cycling from one to the next at an almost monotonous rate. i can't keep living in my imagination like this. hiding from the world and pouring myself into new ones.
i always figured id want to reread david copperfield someday, too. it's one of my three favorite novels ive ever read (not that ive read SO many novels, but still). i think of it often. and i dont think of it like it's a highly literary or intellectual novel. i think of it like an old sitcom or a newspaper strip. like a victorian peanuts or full house. i've never forgotten a bunch of the characters' catchphrases and i've continued to slip them into conversation with people who don't understand them just to overly-explain a joke that only i'm really going to find funny. because that IS the kind of person i am.
ive only read the first four chapters so far. i just cant wait to get to aunt betsey's place, to be honest. i didn't even think about this part... this is the first novel i'm reading since i became an aunt. i never had a character in the book i related to *too* much; i had certain things in common with dora and i loved her, but we weren't one and the same. but my niece is only two and a half months old and i already feel like oh yeah. oh yeah i'd take this little girl in after she ran away from her abusive boarding school. i'd provide for this girl. i'd raise her with my neurodivergent friend that i live with. i would do ANYTHING for her.
#tales from diana#diana rereads david copperfield#may as well make that a tag now#two reasons i thought to reread david copperfield now:#besides as i mentioned i wanted to re-enjoy an old favorite bc ive been cycling through new things so much im getting tired#1) i was going through my old tag from when i reread sense and sensibility like two months after i read it the first time#(after i already went through my tagged/david-copperfield and relived my posts i made from when i first read it)#and i was like gosh it's really been five years EXACTLY since i first read it#i started it in november 2018 and finished in january 2019#wow. like wow#and 2) ive mentioned it on here before but i keep thinking about mr. dick's affinity with king charles i#how i understand what he means now when he said all of king charles' sorrows were poured into his head#when charles was beheaded in 1649#yeah it really is one of my favorite little novels of all time. so much charm and so many ppl in it to love#i told dan when i read it the first time 'i laughed. i cried. i got thrown into debtors prison'#he liked that#also after i read david copperfield the first time i started calling him dan'el. like dan'el peggotty is called#i never stopped doing that lol.#dan doesn't understand that i contain all of mary queen of scots' sorrows but thats ok#i didnt even think about it before reading it but yeah i am absolutely going to be my niece's aunt betsey#your sister betsey trotwood who disappointed me on the night of your birth
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Uh-oh. This is bad
#For some reason I always end up predicting my life events through the fiction I write or read with scary accuracy#especially if everything I’m writing/consuming “feels right” and like I’m being pulled into it#I was just pulled into The Metamorphosis and woke up in the middle of the night to finish reading it#I think I know who that book applies to#And now this book… hm#Don’t like that#unreality#magical thinking#tagging as that just in case but it’s happened before multiple times#They’re not necessarily actual premonitions; they’re me subconsciously piecing together a puzzle of clues#that all lead to me figuring out the most likely series of events to follow#Maybe I’ve heard in-depth information about these books before; but only remember it in the back of my mind#so that the front of my mind cannot recall; and have only been guided by what I’ve heard whispered back there#a subconscious switch gets thrown at the critical point and I’m drawn to it#I knew what happened and what was going to happen in 2018 back in 2017 from my sketchbooks and story outlines#I read Crime and Punishment and like clockwork events very similar to what had happened in the book started happening to me#It worked backwards for awhile from 2019–2021 after I got caught#Every time I happened to glance at a clock; there was either a 4 or a 20 or a 24 on the display. Always. No exceptions.#This went on for months. Those numbers were part of a spell I wrote and recited over and over again; I won’t say the words#because I’m not sure if it’s so much a spell as it is a curse — it is a self-deprecating spell#I only started seeing this number pattern AFTER I had been caught as an apostate; not before#before I’d look at the clock and it would say 5:33 or 9:15 or 12:45; after it was 4:04 or 2:24 or 12:20 ON THE DOT#Call me crazy but if every time you looked at a clock for MONTHS it always read a specific set of numbers you’d go a little nutty too#THEN in 2021 I read 1984 and it described my life up until that point PERFECTLY (WITH the number 4 plastered all over it)#Something happened back then and it’s still fucking happening because I was caught at the end of 2019#Just a little over four years away from the year 2024 and I was driven to set my exit date at 4/24/2024 before reading 1984#1984 is set in April 4 1984; April 4 is 20 days away from 4/24… SEE WHAT I MEAN?! I’m a raving lunatic but I’m right
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spoonietimelordy · 1 year ago
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Who need algorithmic cruelty when people on tumblr can find a post from the most traumatising period of your life.
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pierregaslays · 1 year ago
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some people are soooooo fucking entitled when it comes to fic authors updating their fics 🙂
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