Weird ass Resident Evil head cannons because my brain is too silly
Wesker 100% got bullied by Chris and Jill when he was working with S. T. A. R. S. and cried at least once from it.
The moment Ashely got home she started crying to emo nightcore music while downing an entire pack of shredded cheddar cheese.
Luis definitely grabbed Leon's ass at least once whenever he bent down, then got the same treatment from Leon.
Leon purposefully coughs very dramatically in front of people who smoke to make them feel bad.
Chris has frequent nightmares about marrying Jill just for her to turn out to be Wesker in disguise. Every single time he has that nightmare he wakes up in a cold sweat with tears streaming down his face like he just saw the most horrifying thing know to man.
Rebecca has a penis straw some where in her house. It was a gift from Jill.
Wesker is horribly afraid of horses. Any time he sees a horse he starts running away as fast as he can. One time a horse smiled at him and he started screaming in terror.
The only reason Claire wears a ponytail is because one time when she was younger she went to a public pool with Chris and got her hair stuck in one of the drains and had to get a short hair cut. She was bullied about it for years by Chris.
Sherry is obsessed with Pokemon, especially when Leon first started working with the government since he got a bunch of money, and had a Pokemon themed bedroom. Her favourite Pokemon is Sylveon. Leon's is Pikachu because he's a dumb idiot who never saw the appeal and just wanted to make Sherry happy.
William was incredibly nerdy to the point where Annette would sometimes tape his mouth shut while they worked or else her infodump about each way to use a syringe/suture needle/any sort of medical shit they had to use. Albert didn't mind it when he rambled, though.
Chris once pranked Albert by switching his artificial sugars for his coffee with salt and hiding laxatives in it as well. Albert has never forgave him.
Jill once smacked Chris so hard he fell over and folded like an omelette. His spine has never recovered.
Leon was 100% a fan of Oingo Boingo and Weird Al. I will not explain any further.
Ada gets her nails done every other month by the same nail tech. Rebecca is secretly the nail tech.
Leon once accidentally sat on one of Sherry's Plush Charizards and got screamed at for an hour. Sherry said that she didn't want his "butt cooties" on her dragon.
Ashley loves cheese. Specifically brie.
Leon sometimes stares outside of the windows in his home while zoning out and standing completely straight. He also falls asleep like that with his eyes open. Chris will sometimes join him in watching the outside except he stands like a dad and does that thing where he has some sort of nut in his hands and shakes them around before eating them.
Chris wants to have kids, more specifically a daughter, so when Leon was on missions and Claire had to babysit her, he'd try to bond with Sherry. Sherry was horribly afraid of him and would cry if she was picked up by him.
Chris once smacked Wesker so hard his glasses went flying off. Wesker immediately got on the floor and started searching for them Velma style.
Leon unironicaly goes "YEOWCH!" whenever he gets hurt.
In the helicopter, Carlos slung his arm around Jill to try and be hot. It backfired once he realized Jill was both sleeping and drooling all over his arm. Ew.
Leon coughs like an old man on hospice.
Wesker sneezes like a kitten, especially during serious situations. He goes, "I'LL FUCKING END YOU-Achoo! (。>﹏<。)"
William once mistook Albert for Anette when he was incredibly tired and kissed Wesker on the lips. Neither were complaining.
This is so fucking dumb but please listen to my insane ramblings. PLEASE.
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