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porcellune · 4 years ago

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kamukomahina gender/body headcanons

a bit of a ramble about my body, gender, and general appearance headcanons for them bcuz someone sent me a curiouscat prompting this 3k words of hyperfixation nonsense

Komaeda:

- He has a naturally lithe body, with a thin waist, broad shoulders and hips, which give him an hourglass. and a rather andrognyous body, which is "lucky" for him, because I hc him as nonbinary and gender non-conforming

- Gender-wise, as I said, I think he's nonbinary. Usually I do view Nagito as AMAB but I indulge in transmasc Nagito from time to time depending on my preference and how much I wish to uh, well, project, lol. But either way I think he would use he/they pronouns in a western sense. In japanese, however, they don't use third person pronouns that other people refer to them with, and in canon he uses the first person pronoun "boku", which is a "soft" masculine pronoun, in comparison to the "hard" masculine pronoun, “ore” (which Hajime uses btw!) which fits quite nicely, in my opinion! Also, in Japanese, you can be 'fluid' with your first person pronouns depending on the situation, so I think he could use more neutral or feminine pronouns should he desire it, too, to play on his gender non-conformity.

- Komaeda is very secure in his gender, regardless of being AMAB or AFAB. He does not care about stigma, or discrimination, he does not care about being "accepted" by broader society. Broader society is sort of meaningless to him, the average person and their ideas about gender and presentation and effeminity mean NOTHING to him. Whether or not a random person the street genders him correctly or treats him with respect is sort of, pointless? Because to him, most ordinary people are pointless nobodies. Their thoughts do not matter to him. I think he is still prone to insecurity, however, when around his "betters" but I just struggle to think he would degrade himself in regards to gender. to him, it's the least of his problems. what he cares about is hope and talent. He could dress femininely or wear makeup or straight up crossdress and not mind it, really. He thinks people would find a problem with it are the problem, because why does it even matter? It speaks to the way Komaeda is detached from societal norms & "normal" people, he did not grow up in normal circumstances, so he doesn't interact with the world normally by any means. he can mask and act normally to the best of his ability, often unintentionally?, but he simply does not fit into broader society and doesn't seek to.

- Komaeda loses weight really easily, and doesn't gain weight that well. This is mainly due to his many illnesses but also the medications he's been put on. He has a low appetite and burns weight rather easily, even though I headcanon that he eats like garbage (mainly junk food & takeout, since he obviously cannot cook). This makes him overall, health wise, not very healthy, and stick thin because of it. A stiff breeze could knock him over, tbh.

- He has a lot of faded scars, self-inflicted or not.

- Pre-despair (in HPA) he is fairly healthy but still lithe, and progressively his body deteriorates through his 2 years of hopes peak before the Tragedy begins.

- During the Tragedy itself, his body is at it's worst. he is almost nothing but bone at times, barely kept together by a need to live so he can see hope triumph. His weight fluctuates but he's very unhealthy. He's not anorexic or on death's door, but he's not well off, either.

- After being put into the neo world program, right after waking up, he's very, very thin and gaunt. he was in a pod on feeding tubs for an indiscernible but at least probably a month's worth of time? So he's just very weak, like he could collapse if he moves too quickly.

- But a while after waking, he goes into remission, and starts to gain more healthy habits due to being rehabilitated and cared for by Hinata, and gains some weight, finally at a healthy, normal weight. I still think he would struggle with putting on too much weight, but I am slightly fond of the idea that he gets a bit of healthy pudge after a while. To him, it's so foreign being healthy, that he honestly think something's wrong with him at first.

Hinata:

- Hinata has a very... average body, true to form. His hips and waist aren't too pronounced but he has a loosely "hourglass" shape, too, just not as exaggerated as Komaeda's in comparison.

- Gender-wise, I am EXTREMELY fond of transmasc Hinata. While I think I portray AMAB Hinata more than transmasc Hinata (in art and writing), I still firmly prefer transmasc Hinata. The reason I think portray otherwise more is just out of comfortability, but I've been getting better at comfortably portraying FTM Hinata. I have some reasons I prefer it and think you can extrapolate it from canon, but let's get into that

- Hinata, in my eyes, has an arc and story that fits perfectly into him just. Being trans. His desire to be someone else, someone better, someone he can proud of, and the way he overcompensates for himself and has an extreme inferiority complex would easily lend to him having similar feelings about his gender. To me, Hinata is a trans man who overperforms his masculinity out of insecurity and a need to pass. I see him as someone who would strictly use "he/him" in a western sense, which is lended to by his use of the "ore" pronoun in canon, which is almost hypermasculine.

- Even if he were AMAB, I think it still works, I think he's still someone who's insecure and tries to assert himself more strongly and therefore performs masculinity in a way to appear more confident than he is.

(side note: I actually read a bit about queerness in Japan and how it relates to gender performance and the use of pronouns, and read a bit about how queer women in japan tend to use "boku" and "ore" to perform masculinity, which I find neat. “Ore” was also sometimes used exclusively to show anger and dominance, which is why it's categorized as a "rough" pronoun. I think Japanese language, gender, and expression, and how those all relate to one another, are extremely interesting and if you get the time you should read about it lol)

- Body-wise, pre-despair, I think Hinata would. not have top surgery, obviously. I think he has a fairly average but leaning a little on the hefty side chest (pre-op) and binds it, hence the '91 cm' (but also he still has 91 cm post-op because bazongas). I also just think he leans on the "twunk" side of things at this point, not buff but not stick thin or without muscle, just kind of average with average strength and all, though I think Hinata would've tried to do sports and stuff to find his talent so he's in shape :)

- My personal, kind of amusing, but also kind of... thematical? Headcanon, is that during the Kamukura project, he also underwent gender transition. to be honest, while it may not make sense in modern Japan, I think we can suspend our disbelief for fiction, and also make the argument that Hinata's "transition" into Kamukura CAN be read, in some part, as relatable or at least familiar to the trans experience. Iit is not out of the realm of possibility, either, to assume that because many bits of society in Danganronpa are advanced (specifically science, is extremely ahead of our understanding, almost sci-fi like at times) certain attitudes about gender and sexuality can be smoothed over more in a Japanese context.

(side note: I also think that science-wise, we can suspend our disbelief, and assume that top surgery and bottom surgery are much more advanced in this universe, given the almost unbelievable levels of science in Danganronpa, such as memory wipe, mind control, completely realistic virtual simulation, um literally everything about Kamukura which is body modification and brain modification to an extreme, etc. I think it's kind of fitting within these to assume that... Hinata/Kamukura could just, gain a functioning penis, lol)

Kamukura:

- Kamukura would have a. "Perfect" body. it's stated, I'm pretty sure, that they modified not only his brain but his body, because he needs to be able to perform every talent under their belt with ease, and his strength, instincts, technique, are all superhuman. So it's clear to me he'd have a buff body. toned muscles and all. He wouldn't really feel a need to keep it up, though, but I think since they're very... artificial (basically fucking steroids?) they wouldn't fade from a lack of keep-up.

- Kamukura also rarely ever is injured, but when he does, his body heals rather fast and can care for himself adequately, because again, his body is modified to a point of almost inhumanity.

- Gender wise, Kamukura genuinely does not care. however, I am not one to think that Kamukura is "a different person" from Hinata, rather, he is separate from Hinata, but an extension of Hinata as well, proven that he experiences some of his emotions even if subconsciously and without understanding them. he isn't a different personality or person developed in Hinata's body, but a very traumatizing, repressed, and manipulated version of Hinata given a new name, with memories repressed. He's like Theseus's ship in human form---if you get rid of everything that makes someone themselves and replace it, bit by bit, is it the same person? Technically, yes, but... truly? Who knows.

Because of this, I think Kamukura would have a leaning toward masculine gender performance (in canon, in fact, he uses the soft masculine pronoun "boku" in stead of "ore" like Hinata) BUT I think he is still very nonbinary. In a western sense, i think he would use he/they pronouns, but not really care if someone mistook him for a woman, I suppose.

- His appearance, unironically, is very nonbinary or "he/they" to me because he's wearing a suit, the archetypal form of masculinity, but has extremely long hair, which is considered feminine, and speaks softly (dully). Of course, the bishounen "pretty boy" appearance isn't uncommon or considered less masculine in japan, I think, but there is still a different between soft masculinity and rough masculinity in japan, which lends itself to being interpreted sort of gender non-conforming by western audiences :)

- Kamukura, due to his apathy, struggles with self-maintaining, but as we all probably know i am extremely attached to KamuKoma and thus headcanon that Servant helps him, sort of like a royal servant would royalty in the old days, take care of himself by bathing him, brushing his hair out, grooming him, etc. partially out of duty, partially out of appreciation for Kamukura's body, and partially out of maintaining his sort of "perfect" look since Kamukura, especially post-Junko death, is perceived widely by the public as the new leader of the ultimate despair, even if he is ambivalent to such a title.

Post-DR3 Hinata/Kamukura combined:

As I rambled on about previously, I don't think that Kamukura and Hinata are separate people or personality, I really dislike the interpretation that they are like a "split personality" or operate like DID, because they do not "form" like DID, but also in canon, are not portrayed as separate people.

In post-dr3, Hinata instead says that he is both of them, because he is. Kamukura is Hinata, always was, but had been given a new, false identity, had been stripped of his previous self, his memories, his personality, and crafted into something new. but that did not "split" his brain into two people. It simply repressed who he once was, and made him someone he now was. But when Kamukura regains his memories, his past self, through the means of the new world program by restoring his own memories after SDR2 concludes and he wakes up, as well as doing the same for everyone else, he decides to be "Hajime Hinata" who he always was, but carrying and shouldering the weight of what "Izuru Kamukura" had been, become, and done. Hinata *is* Kamukura, he answers for Kamukura's wrongdoings, his crimes, as something he had done as a different person who's mind operated differently, due to being artificially suppressed, modified, into an apathetic tool for the scientists who made him, and later and aimless, bored individual who simply sought meaning he did not have in the unknown of what despair would be at it's climax. And if hope could overcome it.

As such, I think, when Hinata's self is brought back into the mix, and he now deals with Kamukura's apathy and boredom in part, but much less consuming and much less often, I think hinata is less staunchly "masculine", does not overperform it anymore, and is trying to understand what his past means to him, what his present is, and what his future will be. I think that Hinata would still primarily use he/him (or still use "ore" in Japanese, as it's also a means of his personality, which is a bit rough around the edges and blunt), but be more ambivalent to rigid gender expression, still finding comfort and idealness in masculinity, but not be made dysphoric or feel frightened, uncomfortable, with non-comformity or anything like that. being boyish, masculine, is what he enjoys, but he's comfortable in it now, doesn't need to prove himself or overperform it. He can explore nonconformity without feeling like his gender or masculinity is at threat, even if it's not his preference outright.

Body-wise, I think it's safe to say he retains Kamukura's muscle and all, but Kamukura didn't put much effort into the everyday machinations of being a human being in general, and Hinata is much more fond of food than him now, eats more often, and I enjoy the idea that he gains a little pudge and has a kind of "dad bod" almost, post-DR3? lol.

Both for Hinata and Kamukura I don't see their bodies as “bara” or overly buff, masculine, but a kind of comfortable middle ground between twunk and hunk, lmao. I think they're also averagely hairy, not overly so, very lightly. kind of well groomed, and all. Hinata, pre-despair, put not so much effort into his appearance but still some, especially in trying to pass. (In fact I think his hair cut looks like a home job, all choppy and stuff, which fits him in my opinion, something done by his own hands even if messy and imperfect, he still prefers to be in control of it. also fits the trans headcanon tehe).

Izuru put very little if any effort into himself, only the bare minimum necessary to function, but servant helped him upkeep it to a perfect standard. Hinata, post-dr3 now, finds himself putting you know, an average amount of care into himself and his body, enough to be healthy, but not overly critical and conscious of himself.

Komaeda i have always seen as someone who takes a good deal of care about himself, merely if to alleviate the "disgust" of his appearance and body, by practically preening himself. He is someone who is good at cleaning and seems to appreciate clean and well kept spaces, so I think he would have a similar attitude toward himself. even if he is insecure, and of course, struggles with mental health and may slip at times in his routine in keeping himself well-kept, I think he still maintains an appearance for the most part, at least in his later years (teen to young adult). An argument can be made that he cared less in his adolescence because he had much more apathy about the world, but when he gave himself a purpose with hope and talent, I think he would care for himself a little better, even if his was spiralling mentally.

His hair is always washed, it is just very curly and prone to mess, so it often looks like perpetual bedhead, even when he combs and brushes it. His skin is soft even if a little worn by his tendency for accidents & injury, it's still soft and almost luckily so, and he takes pride in moisturizing and cleaning himself. His skin is a little sickly, still, and I think that despite having blemishes, scars, etc. Komaeda manages to look pretty in a strange way, not conventionally beautiful, but almost ethereal? He's just *pretty*, there's no way to explain it, he is nice to look at even with all his "flaws" and imperfections. Even when he's sickly and bony, even when his cheeks are gaunt or his hands shaky and weak, when his hair is a tangled mess or his clothes are dirty, he's nice to look at in a way that's nonconventional, and it's sort of mesmerizing.

Hinata I think is very average but also in a way that's nice to look at it. He's not ground-breaking hot or conventionally attractive, he has a good body, a nice face, and hair you could play with a little if you wanted. I think what's appealing about him is his normalcy, he's not trying too hard or "gifted" gene wise, but he's just kinda nice to look at, he's enjoyable to be around, an understanding person, or at least tries to be even when he fails, and despite having flaws, insecurities, blunt, he is someone you're drawn to because he's one of those people that's just, easy to talk to? An emotional anchor, almost. The kind of guy everyone kind of knows and has talked to at least once, even if you're not friends with him personally, not because he's cool or popular or anything, but because he's a normal dude who's easy to trust and talk to.

Kamukura, on the other hand, is intimidating, appearance wise and personality wise. he looks, strange, anything but normal, his eyes are red and his hair is this dark cloud that envelops him. His face may still be that plain one Hinata has but faces can be changed by the surrounding attributes as well as expression and such is true for him, with his apathetic and cold expression as well as otherwordly characteristics, he comes off as much more beautiful in a dark way, kind of? In a way that's intimidating or a little daunting, but he's still very beautiful. mesmerizing.

okay, thats my ramble. ty.

#nagito komaeda #hajime hinata #izuru kamukura #komahina #kamukoma #headcanons #my headcanons #kota.txt

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oingo233 · 4 years ago

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You Are Beautiful (1)

Summary: Sirius Black was entranced since the moment he saw you. He had to have you but you are convinced his feelings are fleeting, and will only hurt you. People inside and outside of your relationship meddle in the makings of something that could be beautiful... or disastrous. Will love and confidence win? Or will doubt and uncertainty tear you both down?

Young Sirius Black x Pus SizedFemReader

Warning: one inappropriate joke lol, fluff I suppose and nothing else really. All the real stuff comes later :0

Authors note: I mostly write my xreader fics as neutral but as this is a request, I wrote this as fem. But if anyone would like a male version or neutral version let me know and I will copy this but obviously change readers gender (and it's no burden to me I'd love to make more readers feel included and represented). Also reader is plus sized and she is confident and strong throughout the fic -because plus sized characters aren't represented like that in film/books alot (but if looking for amazing and empowering plus sized female characters Nina Zenik from Six of Crows owns my entire heart and changed how I saw myself personally and I would recommend that book for anyone really)- but as any human she has her insecurities because beauty standards are unattainable and have a way excluding so many people and making us feel less than beautiful. As a plus sized/overweight person myself, I understand how we have to fight to feel beautiful and fight this internalized bias we have when we look in the mirror. But WE ARE BEAUTIFUL. WE ARE WORTHY OF MAGAZINGE COVERS AND COMPLIMENTS AND ABOVE ALL SELF LOVE!! The self insert character in this has fought for her confidence, but it will shake and stumble throughout the series and Sirius and friends are there for her to help her realize for herself how beautiful she truly is, once again. So I hope I didn't stray too far from the request :) Enjoy....

Word Count: 1.8

Authors Note: About halfway through I decided to make it a series oops-

****Blabbering Idiot****

Sirius Black is a man of many, many words. In fact, I'm sure if he was writing this he could quickly turn it into one of the most entertaining novels ever written. He'd describe the laughter of his friends for a whole page. Tell a hilarious joke on the next. Then he'd describe the wind blowing through the open halls and courtyard and the spring sun. He could write about a great many things in great detail. (But he wouldn't because he doesn't quite enjoy writing as much as he does anything else, but that's above the point.)

As I said, Sirius Black is a man of many words. So it was such a curious thing when he first saw you. It was an astounding thing really, because for the first time he found something that rendered him completely speechless.

The sun was peeking through the open corridor and pooled onto you, caressing your skin and hair in an ethereal glow. Highlighting curves that brought both sinful and sweet thoughts running through him. It was as if the universe was telling him, look at what we've created, look at this beautiful creature. But he could hardly believe that this world could create something so lovely and kind. You threw your head back in laughter at something your friend said and suddenly the world is back to normal and all he can hear is your laughter and the sound of his friends curiosity at what could have possibly kept him from the conversation about muggle rock compared to Wizard bands. In fact, James was so passionate about it half the hall turned to listen to his rendition of The Chain by Fleetwood Mac.

But he didn't care, he took a feeble step towards you and suddenly felt so nervous his hands began to sweat. He stuttered and coughed up his words just for a simple "hello" in your direction only for the wind blowing through the halls to carry it away. And his friends laughed at him as he watched you walk too far from where he wanted you. Because, oh did he want you.

Sirus POV:

"I'm telling you, I won't be able to sleep tonight unless I know who she is," Sirius says for not the first time that evening. James started to laugh.

"Why? Because you'll be too busy thinking of her?" James said, laughing as he made a very suggestive hand motion. Peter cackled and Remus rolled his eyes, trying to find the cleaner side of his humor but instead he couldn't help but snort. Sirius pushed James's shoulder.

"Yeah, I'm sure Lily would love to know how familiar with that feeling you are," Sirius says and James stopped laughing immediately, his eyes narrowed.

"Please, you wouldn't dare. And I will deny all accusations, you'll be made out to be a liar. Then the mystery girl will never love you. Is that what you want, Pads?" James joked with a single arch of his brow. Sirius just rolled his eyes. He was only half paying attention, he has been scouring the hallways since he first saw that girl. He wanted to speak to her again, or maybe just stare for a bit. If things went well, he'd be able to do both those things on a date. But he hasn't seen her since that morning and his heart felt oddly shallow. He wanted those butterflies he had when looking at her to come back and overwhelm him again.

"What'll it matter if I don't even know who she is? Or- or if I can't talk to her? No one falls in love with a blabbering idiot," Sirius says. Remus shrugs.

"Lily fell in love with James," he says, Peter laughed again.

"Yeah, regardless of what he does at night," Peter added and now both James and Sirius were rolling their eyes. James and Lily just recently stopped denying their feelings for one another and gave into the sexual tension and mutual pining. Their relationship was still fairly new but they act as if they've been together for years. Sirius supposed that in a way, they have been.

Sirius would watch them giggling, hand and hand in the hall. He'd see them cuddling in the common room, or coming back after dates with rosy cheeks and beaming smiles. Sirius would never admit it out loud, but his heart cried out when he saw them like that. He rarely ever felt lonely. He could have any girl or boy he wanted if he really tried, but for what? One fun night? Only for one more morning where he wakes up alone? He wanted more than that whenever he saw Lily and James, their happiness was palpable. Their love was suffocating.

Sirius always thought he'd find the one after Hogwarts, if at all. But when he saw her... well that changed everything. In a flash he saw himself with her, their hands intertwined and her head thrown back in laughter. Rosy cheeks and bruised lips. Warm beds and making love... being in love. He nearly felt silly after and yet, he knew that even if he did sleep tonight, it would be her he'd dream of.

"Ello' guys!" Lily said, bouncing up to James who kissed her cheek. They walked with their arms looped and Sirius glared at the easy sign of affection. He thought of his parents, how they would be stiff with one another except for in quiet moments, when he'd pass through a hall and glance into their room. He'd spot a quick kiss on the cheek, and soft squeeze of the hand. It were those odd moments for him, that struck him so strongly with a sharp bitterness. They don't deserve softness and love, he'd think, how can such cruel creatures even feel such things? But even then, he'd walk away seeing them as still awful creatures born from the depths of hell, but more human.

"That's her," Sirius whispered so quietly Remus almost didn't hear it. In fact, Sirius didn’t think Remus heard it at all, but it was rather his look of longing towards the Great Hall entrance that gave him away. Because standing right there, was you.

Your hair was a little wind blown, messy around your face, bits of iit shaped your round cheeks and soft eyes. Sirius eyed you up and down and cursed clothes and cursed shyness and cursed his own head for thinking he could even talk to you. But most of all, he cursed a group of boys who walked past you.

Sirius was a confident boy, he knew how to spot someone who held their head up just as high as he did, and you were very much one of those people. You were giggling as you stole a biscuit from a friend and popped it into your mouth, you covered your mouth as you laughed when they complained with a little smile of their own.

"It's just so yummy, and I haven't eaten since breakfast." He heard you say, your friend just shook his head and handed you a plate as you sat down next to him. But right before you could get comfortable a sneering group of boys stole a piece of food from your hand and said something rather rude.

Sirius didn't even realize he had been walking towards you, this girl he has never even spoken too, yet thought of so endearingly, until he was standing right before the boys and had the pack leaders wrist firmly in his grip.

"Drop it boy, c'mon, drop it," he teased. It was humiliating for the boy and he knew it by the laughing and sneering others directed towards the group of boys, but Sirius did not care. The boy dropped the biscuit and looked as if his tail was tucked into his legs. "Good boy," he said, ruffling his hair until it was a knotted mess, the boy winced at just how hard Sirius dug his knuckles into his scalp, Sirius relented with a satisfied smirk.

Sirius’s voice took on a much harsher tone, "Now scram." The boys were out of their seats and in new ones within seconds.

Sirius felt his mood shift completely once they left, because now all eyes were on him, yours included. He looked up at you rather shyly, his hair falling in strands over his forehead. He tucked it behind his ear and found some confidence in the way your eyes followed the movement and how you blushed. He gave you his best smile, hoping his charm wasn't as weak as his legs felt at that moment.

"Hello, I'm Sirius... Sirius Black." Then, like an idiot he put his hand out for you to shake, what charmer just shakes the ladies hand? He stopped belittling himself the moment you softly placed your hand in his.

"It's nice to meet you, Sirius, and thanks for helping me. I know how to handle those filthy 'dogs'" you said, smiling as you remembered the way he spoke to them, he chuckled. "But I suppose it's nice not always having to," you finished with a bright smile on your face. He felt his own cheeks heat up and he nodded but could not think of anything better to say.

"Name," he said, you raised your brows. He cleared his throat, "your name?"

"Oh, how rude of me," you said and then you laughed, that same laugh that caught his attention and has yet to let go. "I'm (y/n) (y/l/n)."

"Nice to meet you," he said, it was as if he couldn't feel the appalled stares of your friends because all he could see was the blush on your cheeks and your head thrown back in laughter. He swallowed thickly before making his way back to his friends. They all wore raised brows and smirks, and he knew they were about to bite into him.

"Treating them like dogs, really? A bit ironic don't you think," Lily said, James shrugged

"That's why it was so good," he said, high fiving Sirius.

"But it admittedly went downhill from there," Peter was sure to add, just like Sirius knew one of them would. Sirius just laughed, too elated to finally know who you were.

"Don't start," he said, but it was too late.

All in union they sputtered out the lame word that will plague Sirius' memory of that moment forever, "Name?"

They cackled at him and ruffled his hair all the way to their seats, but Sirius knew they were pleased for him. And Sirius didn't mind, he could feel the pretty eyes of a pretty girl following him across the room. If only someone told him how important she would become to him, maybe he would have looked back at her and never looked away.

Taglist <3

@enchantedblackrose

#sirius black #sirius black fanfiction #sirius black angst #sirius black fluff #sirius black x y/n #sirius black x reader #young sirius x reader #young sirius black #young sirius imagine #harry potter fandom #the marauders #plus sized reader #sirius black x plus sized reader

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i-write-boop-spoops · 4 years ago

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Steven Stone Fluff Alphabet

To go along with my NSFW Alphabet, I decided to do some fluff for my favourite rock nerd. Hope you enjoy!

A = Activities (what do they like to do with their s/o? how do they spend their free time?)

He loves being outside with you, going for hikes, walks and sea swims. Likes to learn with you too, wandering around museums and discovering new things about science, history and culture.

He probably won’t take you mining unless you’re really into it, it can be quite tedious and dangerous, but he loves when you help him polish stones, or help make them into decorations or jewellery.

He has a soft spot for lazy days where you two are draped across his couch watching trashy reality TV shows and fun, animated films

B = Beauty (what do they admire about their s/o? what do they think is beautiful about them?)

Likes how kind and caring you are, not only to him, but to his Pokemon and almost everyone else.

He thinks you’re beautiful in every way, but he in particular thinks your eyes sparkle like the rarest, most precious gem he has ever seen.

C = Comfort (how do they help their s/o when they feel down? what makes them feel better?)

Steven is a little oblivious, so you might have to tell him that you’re down, but as soon as he knows, it’s his mission to cheer you up! Lots of kisses and cuddles, your favourite meals delivered, a shoulder to cry on, an ear to listen. If you’re sad due to an insecurity, he will wax poetic about how amazing that part of you is to him.

If you’re very stressed due to work or school, and you finally have time off, he’s going to whisk you away to a sun-drenched beach in Alola, the finest room in Hotel Richissime in Lumiouse, or his gorgeous villa by the Batte Zone in Sinnoh (provided he hasn’t given it to some ten-year-old yet lol) to help you unwind and enjoy yourself.

When he’s down, he needs reassurance, and lots of physical affection. He might also throw himself into his work/hobbies to an extreme degree, skipping meals and sleeping little, so you’ll have to ensure he gets fed and a good few hours of sleep until he starts feeling better.

D = Dreams (how do they picture their future with their s/o and in general?)

He would love a little family with you, a couple kids running around, maybe in Mossdeep, but he’s down with moving inland, or to your home region if you’re not from Hoenn, if you would prefer.

He definitely dreams about kissing you goodbye and ruffling his kiddos’ hair before he goes to work. Since his mother died when he was so young, he never really got to experience the classic nuclear family, so he longs to provide it to his own children.

He’d like to go back to college too, get his Masters and maybe PhD in Geology and work in that field. He really does not want to be involved with the Devon Corporation, so he hopes he can work with it as little as possible

E = Equal (are they the dominant one in the relationship or are they rather passive?)

I would say your relationship is equal for the most part, the only thing that tips the scales in Steven’s favour is his wealth and connections. He can get you things or into places that you, as a regular person, wouldn’t be able to at all otherwise.

He doesn’t hold this over your head, he finds people who do that rather gross, and he’s not your sugar daddy either. He does spoil you sometimes, but that’s just one way he expresses his fondness for you.

F = Fight (how quick are they to forgive their s/o? what are they like in an argument? who says sorry first?)

Steven is a reasonable man, so I think once he’s calmed down and thought about it more, he’s ready to forgive you if you’re sorry, Now, this all depends on the nature of why you were in the wrong, if that’s the case. He will let small things slide, and is willing to compromise on bigger things, but if you do something like cheat on him, he will never forgive you.

When he is in the wrong though, he will own up to it, your relationship is more important than his pride.

He doesn’t go for cheap shots or low blows, and he only raises his voice if he is really pissed. If this is before you live together, and the fight occurs at his house, he will get you to leave, but makes sure you get home safe.

G = Gifts (what kind of things do they gift to their s/o? are they spontaneous or do they stick to special events like anniversaries?)

So. Many. Rocks.

Seriously, your shelves will be filled with amethyst clusters and pretty pebbles. Some of this rocks will be jewels encrusted in some stellar accessories.

Beyond that, he’ll get you things he thinks you might need. Complaining about your coffee maker? He’s just gotten you a top of the line model with a prepaid subscription to receive new pods full of expensive Kalosian coffee every month for the next five years. Need a new bag? He’ll have one that costs double your rent shipped to you by the end of the day.

His gifts are expensive and high quality, but he does not buy you them for the sake of flaunting wealth. He just thinks you’d like them.

H = Heart Eyes (what are they like in love? is it obvious to others? how do they express their love? do they brag about their s/o to others?)

Steven feels like nothing can bother him. His smile is wider and his eyes sparkle whenever he thinks of you. He compliments you all the time and gives you lots of tender kisses and touches, spoils you a bit too. He doesn’t really brag, he thinks your amazingness stands for itself.

I = Impression (what first attracted them to their s/o? how accurate was their first impression to how their s/o actually is?)

He just thought you were very pretty when you first met, very sweet and cute. Evidently he was correct :)

J = Jealousy (do they get jealous easily? how do they deal with it?)

Steven rarely gets jealous. He’s not an arrogant guy in any way really, but he is confident in himself and in your relationship.

Things like money, power or status don’t threaten him, but appearance, particularity musculature, does. Steven’s quite the lean, slim guy, and sometimes he thinks he might not be strong or masculine enough for you, no matter how much you disagree. It honestly made him hurt a little when you jokingly called Leon, the Galar champion, a himbo.

When he is jealous, he gets a little stiff, he frowns, he holds onto you a little tighter if you’re around the person who makes him jealous. When he’s alone, he laments about it.

K = Kiss (are they a good kisser? what was their first kiss like? where do they kiss the most?)

Steven is a suave, smooth kisser, each kiss makes you feel like you’re the most precious thing in the world.

Your first kiss with him felt right, he gently cupped your cheeks and kissed you slowly in a manner that portrayed exactly how he felt about you.

He likes to kiss your cheek and forehead, and sometimes your knuckles if he’s holding your hand.

L = Little Things (what are the little things they love about their s/o? are they attentive?)

He loves how kind you are, loves how you treat his Pokémon like each one is the cutest ever, even if they are decidedly not cute. He likes how you look after him, making sure he sleeps and eats, showing up to his house randomly with treats or just to visit him. He really appreciates it.

M = Marriage (do they want to get married? how do they propose? what would the wedding be like?)

Making you his spouse would make him so happy!

His proposal would be very intimate, a night time picnic, either stargazing, watching fireworks or a meteor shower. He’d turn to you, with a soft smile, and tell you exactly how much you mean to him, and how much he loves you. Then, he would take out a small velvet box and ask you to marry him. The ring would be jaw-droppingly ornate, with your favourite gem in the middle.

The wedding would be intimate too, very swanky, with geode centrepieces and formal attire. He’d ultimately like to hold it in somewhere like Reflection Cave, but he’s down to hold it in a castle or hotel otherwise, with nice gardens of course.

N = Nicknames (what do they call their s/o? what do they get called?)

He calls you sweetheart, darling, love, my gem.

You call him Stevie, babe and dreamboat. Sometimes rock nerd or dork if he’s going on about geology.

O = Open (do they have secrets they hide from their s/o? is it easy for them to share?)

He’s pretty open, once you two have been together for a good while. He trusts you enough to tell you his insecurities and darkest thoughts, like how he feels burdened by the weight of his responsibilities, how his strained relationship with his father affects him, or how he still has trauma regarding the loss of his mother.

Just make sure to give him a big hug after he tells you, ok?

P = Pancakes (are they a good cook? how often do they cook for their s/o? breakfast in bed or fancy dinner dates?)

Steven cannot cook to save his life. He never needed to learn, they had a personal chef at home when he was growing up, and when he was older he would go out for food or get it delivered all the time. This continues when you get together, he always insists on paying.

That being said, he’s definitely up to learn, especially if you teach him, or if you can’t cook either, he’d love to learn with you.

Q = Quirk (a random quality/ability that is beneficial to their relationship.)

Steven has a super gentle, super careful touch, which means he gives the most amazing scalp massages. You have no choice but to melt when his fingers are caressing your head.

R = Romance (how romantic are they? are they cliché or creative?)

Extremely romantic, more elegant than corny. He wants you to know how beautiful and amazing you are, and he wants to put in effort to prove that point.

S = Sleep (who falls asleep first? do they need their s/o close to them? do they have any bad habits?)

You do usually, he likes to watch you snooze before he falls asleep. He likes to have you close to him, but he can sleep without you just fine, not waking up next to you is really more of a pain to him.

For bad habits? Steven has a tendency to lose track of time and go to bed very late. It can be frustrating when you need a good cuddle before bed, and when you have to deal with a barely-conscious, sometimes grouchy Steven in the morning.

T = Thrill (do they need to spice up their relationship with new things or do they stick to a routine? how often do they do new things?)

If Steven wants to go somewhere or do something, he does because he has the luxury to. So when it comes to new experiences, like visiting somewhere new, trying a new activity, and you both want to go there or try it, he will have it organised straight away.

He only really has a routine when league business is in full swing, and when he is no longer champion, anything goes. Though if you have a routine, he will work around it.

U = Unity (did their s/o change them somehow, or the other way around? what traits do they share?)

Steven, due to his wealth and connections, had a habit of dropping everything to go on trips or rock-hunting whenever he felt like, which was detrimental to many of his relationships, mainly because he wouldn’t notify people before he left.

You, however, have taught him the importance of taking other people’s feelings and opinions into account. You’re so attentive with him, and in turn, he learns how to do just that with all the important people in his life.

You’re both kind people, who care deeply about each other and Pokemon

V = Value (how important is their relationship to them? what is it worth compared to other things in their life?)

At the beginning, the relationship is just a luxury for him, something he enjoys, but not something he needs in his life. But the longer you two are together, the more important you and your needs become to him.

You definitely become his point of focus, your happiness is his goal. He doesn’t stop engaging in his hobbies and interests, but he does do so in a manner that disrupts your relationship the least.

You are his rock, the love of his life, and he puts you before everything.

W = Wild Card (a random fluff headcanon.)

Cried while drunk at his Bachelor Party because he just really wanted to be married to you already and he could not understand why he had to wait to do so.

X = XOXO (do they like to kiss and cuddle? are they upfront about their relationship or rather shy when in public?)

Steven is quite affectionate at home, lots of soft kisses, hugs and long cuddles.

In public, his displays of affection are very elegant and appropriate. He wants you to know he loves you and finds you beautiful, even when in public. He likes to hold your hand, or rest his on your hip or the small of your back.

Will kiss your lips as a greeting or to say goodbye, but will mostly stick to occasionally kissing your cheek or forehead when you’re out.

Y = Yearning (how do they cope when they spend time away from their s/o? do they miss their s/o?)

Steven really starts missing you when there’s no way you can be together, like when he’s abroad and/or working. Usually during these times, he texts frequently and calls you at least once a day, provided he’s not stuck in some cave. He likes to gaze fondly at pictures of you, planning how he’ll make it up to you when you reunite

Z = Zoo (do they have pets? do they want some in the future?)-

Of course! He is/was a champion after all, so he has his pokemon team, plus some random beldum floating around. You treat his like your own, and vice versa, so it’s a very happy household.

#steven stone #steven stone x reader #steven stone fluff #champion steven #champion steven x reader #tsuwabuki daigo x reader #tsuwabuki daigo #oras #silver haired dreamboat

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kirishwima · 4 years ago

Note

Hello lovely! Hope you're doing well. 💖 If you're taking Mysme requests still, I was wondering if you could do headcannons for the RFA+V (and Saeran if you want) with a female MC who has depression and struggles with being overweight and the insecurity that that brings, but instinctively hides her stress and prioritizes the others over herself?

anon are you Me. Are You. this is too specific and i relate 100%, i'm sorry you feel this way, know i love & appreciate you <33

I'll use she/her pronouns for MC since you specified them!

RFA + Saeran with an insecure, depressed, overweight MC:

Yoosung:

* Listen, I love him, but boy would take a while to realise that MC's insecure, especially if she keeps hiding her own anxiety to help him when he's upset

* He will tell her he loves her CONSTANTLY, and when you don't love yourself, hearing that can...hurt sometimes, makes you doubt yourself. If she doesn't voice this concern, he won't take much note of it-he'll understand when she's upset, of course, and do his best to help, but he's not the best at reading between the lines, so she'll need to be a little bit more upfront about it

* The one scenario I can picture, is him coming home one day, perhaps finding MC getting dressed or after a shower-standing in front of a mirror, gaze averted, shoulders tense.

* He's happy to see her, but notices her stiff smile, how she flinches away when he goes to hug her, and when he asks what's wrong, if she says 'nothing' he'll insist until she talks to him, tells him her insecurities, how she doesn't get what he sees in her, how she'll be happy when they're together but then feel so empty the next moment.

* He'll feel SO guilty for not recognising the signs, but he won't beat himself up over it-what's most important is helping her, not wallowing in self-pity.

* He'll sit with MC for as long as it takes that day, will hold her close and list all the things he loves about her even if she doesn't believe a single one of them. He can't relate to the insecurities about her body, though he'll try to convince her he loves her as is-because it's the truth! He can however, relate to what it's like to feel empty, to force yourself through the motions of daily life while shrivelling up inside.

* So he vows to help, in anyway possible.

Zen:

* Listen, I refuse to believe that behind all that narcissism there aren't insecurities stemming from all the shit he's been through in his childhood. Boy's developed narcissism to cope with what he thought of himself as a kid, and I stand by that.

* So he's more observant than you might think-when he sees MC checking herself in the mirror, poking at her stomach, how she'll sigh and put a big hoodie over her t-shirt, how she shies away from physical affection, how seeing him shirtless oftentimes makes her feel bad about herself, that he 'has to be seen with her'-he notices it all, and hates it, hates that her brain made her think she's anything less than gorgeous.

* He tried asking her about it but she insists she's fine and she's no more or less insecure than the average person-ever the one to try and keep his worry at bay.

* So instead he'll let her know he loves her every single day, will tell her he loves her body, will post online about how proud he is to be with her-for all the world to know, so no one will ever dare question her worth.

* It's an uphill battle, and it's not one Zen can win for her, but he'll do his best to help, so she can realise her own self-worth.

Jaehee:

* Baehee would be one of the most observant people in the RFA-though she doesn't share the same insecurities, she can understand them, and will often prod MC, asking her to talk about anything that might be bothering her.

* If MC says 'it's nothing, please don't worry', she won't push much; she doesn't want her to completely clam up. But she'll always be gentle, holding MC's hands as she says she'll always be here if MC wants to talk, that she helped her so much she wants to be MC's support too.

* I know how weird it feels lending clothes to others when you're chubby-so I feel like sharing clothes with Jaehee would be...an ordeal. Being unable to wear Jaehee's skinny jeans, whilst she can fit into MC's, would sting, and it'd only add onto MC's guilt-she doesn't want to feel this way about her girlfriend! She loves her, appreciates her, doesn't ever want her to know about these thoughts.

* But again, Jaehee knows. She understands it, so-she takes MC shopping, and together they buy matching pairs of pyjamas and t-shirts, things that, whilst they don't need to share, can wear and be reminded of one another.

* "I love you as you are-you accepted me for who I am, so let me do the same for you" she'll say, will hug MC and hold her close until she lets her feelings out, talks about her worries.

* Jaehee would be eager to help search for a good psychologist, to get MC professional help-she knows what she can do as MC's girlfriend isn't much, so she wants MC to get the best help she can.

*And of course, she'll be there for MC every step of the way

Jumin:

* oof...listen. He loves MC SO much, will buy her the moon if she asks, but this man..he's only recently discovered his own emotions. He's emotionally dense, and when MC says she's fine, he tends to take it at face value. Why would MC lie to him, after all? She trusts him enough to let him know if something's bothering her, doesn't she?

* Not to say he doesn't realise there's something wrong-he's a businessman, reading his clients is a part of his job description, emotions included. So when MC's smile stretches thin, when she's overwhelmed but swallows it down in favour of acting like everything's okay, he knows-maybe not to the extent that others might've, but he can tell something's wrong, and he'll honestly be upset MC doesn't talk to him about it.

* So he'll just...sit down and talk to her about it. Ask her to be upfront with him, tell her he wants her to be happy, that he wants to be there for her and help her any way he can, but can't do that if she doesn't talk with him and let him know what's wrong.

* If MC breaks down-if she cries, hides her face in her hands, he'll be shell-shocked. He's so used to her smiling, even at the face of adversity, that seeing her like this...he has no idea what to do at first, not one used to emotional outbursts.

* Insticts soon kick in though, and he gathers her in his arms, rubs his hands on her back, letting her cry until she calms down, no matter how long that takes.

* When she tells him about her depression, her insecurities, he'll nod, quietly listening to her worries, formulating a plan of attack.

* He quite bluntly doesn't understand why she's insceure. She's beautiful?? He loves her exactly as she is?? If she wants to change something about her appearance she's more than welcome to, but to want to do that because she feels she must is...absurd. He simply won't allow it.

* I know it's a cliche in a lot of these headcanons, that he'd buy perfectly tailored clothes for MC, that he'd purchase the finest, most flattering clothes for her to feel as beautiful as she is in his eyes, but it's true-he would, hell, he'd probably read up on fashion himself so he'd be able to help her pick out outfits. He'd do anything for MC, and that's NOT an exaggeration.

* Plus he'd insist on her going to therapy-I headcanon that after realising his own emotions he'd probably start attending therapy sessions himself, to try and get a better read on his emotions, so he'll be a pretty strong advocate for therapy, and he wants the very best for MC.

Seven:

* HAHAHAHAHAH.

* This man...not only can he absoloutely relate, it's honestly a big reason why their relationship is rocky, to say the least.

* Having two depressed, self-sarificing people who'd rather bury their emotions in the depths of their gut rather than admit emotional vulnerability in a relationship? Yeah, not a good idea.

* He'll be using humour to cope with his depression, trying to get MC to open up instead, whilst MC's just pretending she's Never Had a Negative Thought in her life, trying to get Seven to open up instead. You see the issue, yeah?

* Honestly it'll take a lot of walking on eggshells and dancing around the issue until either one of them breaks down, admitting defeat, or they share an honest, adult conversation about their emotions and about how they both need help-which, realistically speaking, I find quite unlikely to happen.

* Not to say the relationship won't work out-God, Seven wants it to work out so, so much. He'll tell MC he loves her constantly, he'll make it so in order to enter the apartment, she'll need to say one thing she loves about herself each day at the security door before it can be unlocked, he'll do everything in his power to help her with her body issues because he loves her, worships her as is.

* The ideal solution honestly would be someone else from the RFA-Jaehee probably, lol, coming to boink them both over the head and drag them to therapy, both individual and couple's sessions, so they can finally start expressing their emotions to one another in a way that ISN'T memes or self-deprecating humour.

* It'll take a while but-they'll make it work. They love one another too much not to.

V/Jihyun:

* This man. This sweet, sweet man.

* He knows what it's like to be insecure, to feel uncomfortable in your own skin, knows what depression is like, how it takes a hold of you and leaves you a shell of who you once were, or worse-who you could've been.

* He's so attuned to his own emotions, he's learnt to recognise the signs in himself-and ergo can tell when someone else is also suffering, although to what extent, it's not always easy to tell.

* He hates MC feeling this way about herself. He loves her so much, she's the one that pulled him out of his own self-depracating, self-sacrifising depressed state, has helped him seek help and become a better man-he wants to be able to support her too, wants to do everything in his power to help.

* But helping someone who won't even admit there's something wrong...isn't easy. He's so gentle and patient though, and slowly helps tear MC's walls down. He'll never prod too much, will simply..be there for her. Will hug her, run his fingers down her sides. If she squirms away, afraid of him feeling her love handles, he'll simply smile and say he loves her, finds every single thing about her beautiful-he'll purposely trail his hands to said love handles, if she's comfortable with it, looking her straight in the eye when he says "Every part of you, I'm in love with. Please don't take my words lightly."

* If she's up for it, he'd love to photograph her-but it's not easy, when you're so awkward in your own skin, to accept to be viewed through a camera lens. So instead he'll draw her, his sketchbook filled with doodles of her face when she's happy, when she's concentrating, her body as she sleeps, head smooshed into the pillow.

* He'll never push her, letting her take things at her own pace-but he'll be there to aid in every single step

Saeran:

* I know I said it for Seven and V to but...out of everyone, I feel like he'd understand MC's predicament the most. Insecure about his frail body, dealing with the trauma Mint Eye has left him with, trying to combat his demons and anxieties whilst trying to return to being a member of society-he's going through...a lot, to say the least.

* So it's honestly understandable how MC will swallow down her own issues, do her best to support Saeran instead. Will she break in the process? Perhaps. She doesn't care. Not if she can help him in the process.

* Saeran might not notice it initially, too focused on his own issues which-honestly, understandable. It's not everyday you leave a cult after all. But the more he talks with MC, the more he realises she's hiding so much from him, slowly notices how often she forces a smile on her face, how she'll nervously cover her mid-riff with her arms whilst sitting down, how she shies away from attention-

*He's almost never the one to initiate physical affection with her, and she doesn't initiate it much either-but when he does, when he leans in to kiss her and feels her tense he panics, pulls away because-is she reacting this way because she doesn't want him?

* When she explains it's not that, that she loves him and wants to be with him, he'll press the issue, ask her why she'll shy away from him then-not in a mean way, he'll just honestly be so worried, wondering what's wrong and how he could help.

* And when/if MC does tell him about her issues...there's not honestly much he could do. He'll tell her he loves her, that she's beautiful, that her body's a vessel to carry her soul around, and that soul is so wonderful it radiates joy to everyone around her, but he knows how hard it is to believe such words when in this mindset.

* So instead, he suggests they go to therapy together. He knows it's not the easiest thing in the world-but he wants her to get the help she deserves. He'll hold her hand on the way to her first session, will wait outside for her, smiling up at her when she's done.

* Things will slowly get better for the both of them.

-masterpost-

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mercurytrinemoon · 5 years ago

Text

Natal Saturn in the houses

Note: Saturn has a tendency to overcompensate so some of the traits can be flipped (just like I mentioned in Saturn in the 2nd) and the result can be the opposite. Also just like with every aspect, these are extracted depictions of a single planet energy so look if your Saturn receives any aspects, are they flowing or challenging. Also, look if there's other planets in the house that can ease or aggravate Saturn's influence. For example, Saturn in the 12th house is big sceptic energy but not if you also have Neptune there.

fire houses: lack of spontaneity, vitality, issues with self-expression and purpose in life.

earth houses: issues with physical and material comfort. Matters of work, authority and competence.

air houses: challenges linked to intellect, communication and relations with other people.

water houses: Feelings of isolation, loneliness, being unaccepted, emotional suffering. Underlying psychological issues and fears.

1st house: connects to personality, physical body, presentation of one's self, experiences. Stiffness of character, troubles with expression. Passive, cold, shy, closed personality. Lack of confidence, hiding from the world. Issues with the body. Being hard on oneself and others as an overcompensation. Willpower, stubborness. Personality or physical attributes of a Capricornian nature.

2nd house: connects to one's belongings, material security. Living in a poor environment & with no money in early life that can lead to insecurities. Fear of poverty. Feeling of security obtained through money and posessions. Can lead to hoarding, greediness, avarice. Or the opposite: a belief that money is dirty; being repelled by greed.

3rd house: connects to communication, education and movement. Blockages in communication. Issues with early education and among peers during school years. Lack of "fresh" thinking. Can lead o psychosomatic health issues, including speech problems (stutter etc). Playfulness of 3rd house energy is very much supressed by mature and serious Saturn. Feeling of isolation from the close environment. Full of tact, diplomatic, serious mind. Interested in serious topics. Dogmatic. Belief that life is the best teacher. Prone to accidents.

4th house: connects to childhood and family matters. Need for a strong feeling of security. Difficult childhood. Strong attachment to family, especially to the father figure and if he's not present - feeling of responsibility to take care of the family. Issues in the family. Feeling of being unwanted. Inner security achieved through understanding and setting one's own roots; through accepting emotional sensitivity.

5th house: connects to expression, romance, fun and children. Blocked creative energy. Feeling of not getting enough recognition. Lack of belief in oneself. Lack of confidence despite talents. Strong need for appreciation and being in the spotlight. Working in the entertainment business to seek applause. Being hard on oneself in terms of creativity. Messy love life. Need for faithfulness and commitment in romantic relationships. Being "bad at love" (lol cause Halsey has this aspect). Not being able to have children; not wanting to have them; children as a source of burden; Capricornian children.

6th house: connects to everyday life, sickness, work & service. Disrupted routine that leads to low self-esteem and fears. Need for a discipline. Health issues. Hypochondria. Obsession with staying fit & healthy. Working on one's body and well-being. Service to others as an obligation; doing the dirty work for others. Falling into routine/sticking to the same job (despite, for example, hating it), because it's an easy thing to do or because they lack motivation. Well organized (Saturn is into structures).

7th house: connects to one-to-one relationships and partnerships. Issues with close relationships. Isolation and loneliness. Lessons from relationships. Older or Saturnian partners. In lookout for serious relationships. Running away from partnerships. Serious and conventional matters as the root of relationship issues - relationships are too formal. With Saturn in the 7th it is helpful to balance relationships, to make the connection even.

8th house: connects to emotional exchange. Issues concerning financial matters that in reality have emotional roots. Issues with joined resources. Issues and fears around sexual and emotional expression. Sex seen as something very serious. Seeing 8th house matters as a taboo or being fascinated by them. Hidden traumas. Search for unity, rather than security (like in the 4th) that could bring transformation.

9th house: connects to higher education, spirituality, journeys of the body and mind. Lack of belief in anything. Dogmatic upbringing that leads to disappointment and rebelling against religion and spirituality as an adult. Need for justice, sensitivity to other people's lives. Feelings of depression and hopelesness when it comes to one's life path and future. Strong intuitive perception. Turning to philosophy. Trying to understand the deeper meaning. Need for ideals.

10th house: connects to work, public image, ambition. Fear of public failure. Big workaholic energy. Delays in achieving goals and getting "out there", but that can lead to ambition and determination and these are the things that Saturn likes and rewards. Being an authority and a role model. Inner motivation. Slow climbing to success despite obstacles.

11th house: connects to groups, social issues. Lone wolf. Issues with making social connections. Shy, lonely & awkward. Sees social groups as superficial; is for the lookout for people that are serious and deep. Avoidance of frenships in fear of being rejected. Feeling of having to be better than everyone else. Quality over quantity when it comes to friends.

12th house: connects to endings but also beginnings (the next house is the 1st); succlusion, self-undoing, karma. Feeling of separation or separating from others. Sometimes physical separation through hospitalisation or being locked down. Hopelesness. Depression. Fears. Victim mentality. Issues kept hidden because of a belief that no one's gonna understand them. Isolation through having to take care of an ill parent. Feeling of guilt. Mental issues or issues with drugs. Scepticism toward spirituality. Father figure who is not present. Mother struggling while pregnant; being born in a heavy atmosphere.

#astrology #natal planets #natal chart #natal placements #birth chart #saturn #saturn in the houses #astrological houses #astro notes #astrology notes #saturn return #mercurytrinemoon

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missskzbiased · 4 years ago

Text

Forget me not

Genre: Fluff, Romance, Oneshot, Drabble, Established Relationship! au

Pairing: Kim Seungmin x Fem! Reader

Word Count: ~2,3K

Notes: The seventh fanfic for the Valentine’s request [That you can find here]

I don’t know anything about flowers language! So if it’s wrong, please blame google SUHAHUSAHUSHUAHUSA

Chan || Minho || Changbin || Hyunjin || Han || Felix || Seungmin || Jeongin

Masterlist

Requested: Yes, by 💎anon [I hope you like it! I don’t think I’d ever think of something like scavenger hunt for a plot lol, so it was kinda challenging. I did like to write it, and I hope it meets your expectations! <3]

General Tag List: @channiewoo @aliceu @bythesunnotbythemoon

[If you wish to be tagged to the other Valentine’s requests, please send me an ask <3]

///

You pouted at your empty bed.

You and Seungmin had planned to spend the day with each other, celebrating your fifth Valentine’s day together, and yet he was nowhere to be seen. You missed his warmth as soon as you woke up, a soft pillow under your arm instead of his body. You frowned, still kinda drowsy as you get up from bed, wandering around the house to look for him.

“Come one, Seungmin! This isn’t funny” You whined in the middle of your living room, swiveling your head to get a clue but meeting nothing else than a pile of waffles on your table. You approached them, poking the warm and soft pieces twice, humming as you tasted the syrup… He wasn’t long gone.

Maybe you should wait for him? Did he go out to buy some milk or something? Maybe he was trying to make you a romantic breakfast? You sat down, staring at the food before noticing a pink note attached to the plate. You would finally get some answers!

I made you some waffles… This time I didn’t burn them! Haha. Please, eat well. I love you. Yours, one (first) and only Seungmin.

You arched your brow, confused as to why Seungmin would scratch a correct phrasing to place a “first” there, but too tired to really care. You took a bite from the waffles, humming in appreciation. He did really get much better at this!

You chuckled as the memory came back to you.

The burnt smell spread all over the place, waking you up and alarming you. The panicked squeak that you heard from the kitchen didn’t help much to placate your fears, so you rushed there, stumbling all around the place. You would have expected anything but Seungmin standing in your kitchen ─ ashamed eyes snapping at you in a silent apology ─ with a plate of black pancakes, surrounded by a thin smoke.

The first time he slept over and wanted to do you a surprise.

You got better at this, hm? Didn’t even burn down my house this time! You messaged him, chuckling as you munched another piece, eyes fixed on your phone to not miss his answer.

There is a first for everything! He answered, making you roll your eyes playfully. What a silly guy. Ready to come and meet me?

I missed you here with me… You typed, pursing your lips as you sent him the message. Was it too cheesy? Are we going on a date today?

First, you have to meet me! He said, and you almost could hear him giggling excitedly wherever he was. It’s Scavenger time, kitten! I promised you this Valentine’s would be really special, didn’t I?

Scavenger as in a scavenger hunt? You chuckled, shaking your head in disbelief. And you’re my prize? How conceited… You mocked him, getting up from the table to go to your room and get changed.

He didn’t answer your messages after that.

////

You crossed your arms over your chest.

Were you being too naïve? You stared at the door unsurely, rubbing your chin in wonder. Seungmin was witty and he liked to drop subtle hints around… Were you being too conspirational or were you on spot? He wouldn’t keep repeating “first” all around if it didn’t mean anything, right? The “casual” choice of words was quite suspicious as well… He never called you a kitten before.

Coincidence or not, the first time you met each other was here.

A cat adoption center.

The first time you met Seungmin, you were going to adopt a cat to gift your best friend. They just loved cats and you couldn’t help but think it was the perfect gift. You were right indeed, but up to this date, your friend joked around saying that Seungmin was the best gift they could have given to you.

You gathered your courage to get in the place, looking around to see if you could see him anywhere. He was nowhere to be seen. Unsurprisingly, though, Minho came right in your way, an amused smirk playing on his lips. You crossed your arms, narrowing your eyes at him.

“Do you know what is this all about?” You asked suspicious of him.

“No, Seungmin knew he couldn’t trust me with a secret” He chortled “The only thing I know is that he’s being cheesy and asked me to hand you this” He said, extending a small envelope to you.

The first time we ever met… Do you still remember it? Although you can never let him know, I’m forever grateful to Minho for dragging me with him there. Even if his whole point was for me to see that cats were better than dogs. They’re not. You can tell it to him now if you want. Still, it is thanks to him that I ever landed my eyes on you. It’s also thanks to him that we got our first date… You know where you should be going now, right? No need to worry, no one will spill their soda on you!

P.S.: If it does happen for some reason, I didn’t plan it. Please don’t hit me.

You chuckled, lifting your eyes to Minho playfully.

“Sorry, but cats suck” He scoffed at you, rolling his eyes.

“He’s brainwashing you, Y/N!” He jokingly complained, poking your forehead, “Go away!” He whined, pushing you to the door “And if he asks, I didn’t tell anything about Hyunjin”

“But you didn’t tell me anything about Hyunjin” You frowned, getting an unimpressed look from him “Oh!” You chortled “Thank you, Minho! It’ll help me a lot” You waved at him, getting out of the store.

////

This time you just walked confidently into the store.

You looked around to find Hyunjin, already aware that Seungmin wouldn’t be waiting for you there. You peeked at the clothes displayed, chuckling as you remember your first date with Seungmin.

Although both of you were nervous back then, Seungmin was a whole new kind of a mess. The way he got startled when his fingers brushed yours over the shared French fries would forever be carved in your mind as his most hilarious reaction to anything ever. Unfortunately, the soda he spilled over you would also be forever there on your favorite blouse… One could not only win, right?

“Oh, you’re here!” Hyunjin smiled at you, walking your way “How is it going? Are you liking to play detective?” He chortled, looking for something through his pockets.

“He’s being too cute for a simple Valentine’s Day” You pointed out to see if Hyunjin would give anything away but he just shrugged “Seungmin was always the hopeless romantic, though” You acknowledged, getting a humming from him.

“I won’t tell you anything, I’m not Minho” He snorted.

“Come one! I want to know what’s going on!” You whined.

“Then solve everything and meet him!” He retorted playfully, handing you the next letter before walking away.

I hope no one had spilled anything on your clothes today… If someone did, though, I have a surprise for you. Hyunjin should be back with it in no time. Even though that first date was a mess, I’m happy we had so many others after that so I could redeem myself. I had never been so nervous in my whole life, and I think deep down I already knew you were special. I know I’m the one who’s doing this to me, but I wish I could be there to kiss you right now. For me, every single kiss we shared was as tender and full of love as the first one… But the first was what brought us together, and I hope it will bring you back to me once more.

You smiled softly as the warmth spread over your chest.

You didn’t even need to try and get this out of Hyunjin… You knew exactly where to go now. You raised your eyes to meet a goofy Hyunjin showing you an outfit too similar to the one you wore on your first date with Seungmin.

“Put this on before you go!” He chirped.

////

The bus stop was empty.

You made your way to the bench, a sigh leaving your lips as you looked fondly at the place, a nostalgic Feeling engulfing you. The first kiss you shared was rushed and unsure, a bold way to make up for the words you couldn’t speak up. The insecurities were offset by the overflowing feelings that were enough to reassure both of your hearts.

You still remembered how you got on the bus, upset by the lack of attitude from Seungmin. Didn’t he like you? Because you sure as hell liked him! Couldn’t he just make a move? Anything? You sighed when you turned away, stepping inside the vehicle with nothing but disappointment in your heart. Maybe he didn’t like you as much as you liked him…

Then it hit you.

What if he felt just the same way as you?

When you snapped your body to turn away and get back to him, he was already there to catch you. Apparently, the same thought had occurred to him, and his arms wrapped you up as your lips met half-way. The initially rushed kiss turned into a loving and tender one rather quickly as soon as you realized that both of you weren’t going anywhere.

Well, except that the bus driver kinda needed you to go or stay.

The ride home was filled with a cozy feeling as you nuzzled each other.

You sauntered there mindlessly, sitting on the bench before looking around curiously, noticing a poster hanging on the wall. You narrowed your eyes in suspicion, noticing how familiar the couple on the picture looked like. It was you two. Seungmin held your hand, and it was painfully obvious how he was stiff and anxious there while you had no clue of what was going on, smiling brightly at the picture.

The restaurant where he confessed his feeling for you.

The place where both of you finally got together.

You chuckled, knowing exactly what bus you should be riding right now.

////

Seungmin was waiting for you with a small flower.

“You’re here” He stated quite awkwardly, and you couldn’t help but tilt your head in confusion. It sounded like he wasn’t happy to see you “You’re… You look amazing” He said emotionally, and you burst out laughing.

“You don’t look bad as well” You teased, checking him out “I’d even say you’re the most handsome boyfriend I have ever met” You chuckled, getting closer to him to place a kiss on his lips.

He didn’t let you.

Seungmin extended his hand to you, shoving the flower in your hands.

“What is it? Another clue?” You asked confused, looking at the small plant. You didn’t know much about flowers, but you recognized it as a forget-me-not. Only Lord knows why you would know it, though.

“Y/N…” He cleared his throat, loosening up his collar “I brought you here today because…” He took a deep breath “Because here was the place I finally confessed my feelings for you” He finished, kinda proud of himself for managing to say that much.

He took one step ahead, holding your hands on his.

“I know you’re a big fan of Scavenger Hunts… But it wasn’t the only reason why I made this” He continued, a little bit more at ease as you smiled at him encouragingly “First, in this entire world… Meeting you was the best thing that could ever happen to me. Finding you? It was the right place and right time… And you’re the right person for me… On this scavenger hunt of life, you’re the only one I’d ever want” He pursed his lips.

What did you do to deserve him?

“I-I’m giving this flower to you…” He gulped down, eyes wavering as he tried to focus on yours “Because it means true love…” You cooed at him, expression softening as you felt your heart swelling “It’s to remember all those memories we shared… And how we’re here now, how our love grew with time… It’s to say that this isn’t a spark” He squeezed your hands, eyes finally fixing on yours.

“Seungmin… This is beautif—“ You teared up, but he didn’t let you finish.

“We had many first times together… And I treasure and remember every single one of them… They’re memories that I never want to let go” He continued, and you could feel his hands shaking “But more important than having first times… I want you to be all of my firsts and last times for everything… I want to have two, three, four… A hundred of experiences with you”

He let go of your hand, wiping his hands on his pants.

“I truly love you, Y/N” He choked, getting on one knee. You widened your eyes, startled by the slow yet too sudden motion, the tears immediately making their way to your eyes “There is no one else I want to share my life with… This was the place where I first asked you to be mine… And this is the place where I want to ask you to be mine till the end”

You tried to wipe your tears away, face twisting in a crying frown that would look awful on the photos people were taking of you. It didn’t matter though. Nothing else mattered because Seungmin was on his knee, showing you a small box that contained the symbol of all your love and connection.

“Y/N… Will you marry me?” He asked, tears rolling down his face.

You would never even dare to say no.

#skz fanfic #skz fluff #skz x reader #skz scenarios #skz imagines #stray kids fanfic #stray kids fluff #stray kids x reader #stray kids scenarios #stray kids imagines #kim seungmin fanfic #kim seungmin fluff #kim seungmin x reader #seungmin fanfic #seungmin fluff #seungmin x reader #seungmin scenarios #seungmin imagines #💎anon

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hollyxqx · 5 years ago

Text

LOVER, LEAVER // JIMIN // 05

↪ PAIRING: Reader/Park Jimin (initially reader/Jungkook) ↪ SUMMARY: There’s only so much cheating you can take from your boyfriend when he’s on tour before you take matters in to your own hands. ↪ WORD COUNT: 8.3k

↪ WARNINGS: mentions of addiction/drugs, alcohol abuse, there’s FLUFF people can you believe it, jimin is a slight rich bitch in this lol, a baby is born, slight smut

01 | 02 | 03 | 04 | 05 | FINAL

Jimin very kindly and patiently lets you vent your concerns about Jungkook to him. You know you're rambling, you know it's not Jimin's duty to listen to fret over your ex-boyfriend but he does anyway, and without complaint. Jimin merely holds you tightly, nodding and offering encouraging agreement when needed. He cares about Jungkook too and you know your worries are shared.

Your eyes spill with tears and he wipes them away without question. How are you so lucky to have someone as understanding as him? Jimin doesn't protest or tell you to stop; instead he tells you he appreciates how compassionate you are. When you're finished with your tirade you thank him over and over again until he shushes you with a kiss.

The sofa you're curled up on with him creaks as he stands, reluctantly pulling away from you. He returns after a few moments with some tea for you both and it's so kind it makes your heart ache. You accept it from him with a mumbled thank you.

Taehyung, a former stranger turned roommate of three days, enters your apartment as you set your cup back down. Jimin peers over his shoulder as Taehyung removes his outdoor clothing and shoes. He stiffens beside you. The arrangement is still new and you can sense there is something going on inside Jimin's head. Taehyung waves and shouts hello to you both upon seeing on the sofa before disappearing inside the kitchen.

Taehyung is a video editor for a local news station and works absurd hours, you've noticed. In the short time you've lived together your paths have only crossed a handful of times.

You return his greeting with feigned cheerfulness and look back to Jimin, his lips press together in a stern line. "What?" You ask, sensing his hesitancy. To your confusion, he looks uncomfortable.

"Nothing." He shakes his head dismissively and looks away. His own tea is still untouched.

"Wanna stay over tonight?" You ask after another sip of tea. Jimin nods, eyes anywhere but you.

Jimin heads straight for your bedroom after that, obviously expecting you to follow. It's late and he wants to retire to bed you assume. However you head in to the kitchen to catch up with your new house mate. Taehyung is nice, thoughtful and so far, a good person to share a living space with. Although the only other boy you've ever lived with was Jungkook so you don't have much room for comparison.

"How was work?" You ask casually, leaning against the doorframe. Taehyung eats like a horse and he's already biting into a cereal bar whilst stacking a mountain of ingredients atop the counter.

"Good!" He mumbles, catching some of the food that spills out of his mouth as he tries to smile. He swallows. "How are you?"

"Fine. Jimin's here by the way. Do you mind if he stays overnight?" You ask. Jimin has never stayed over while Taehyung has been home and you don't want to be disrespectful.

"He's your boyfriend of course not." Taehyung shrugs, kicking the fridge shut with his foot. You eye his potential meal and wonder how he remains so slim. He must work out a ton. "I've got noise cancelling headphones." He flashes you a boxy grin over his shoulder as he begins to prep his food.

"He's not my - He's not..." You stammer quietly, blushing at the comment. Jimin and you have made nothing official. If Taehyung senses your awkwardness he says nothing. "We're not animals Taehyung, we'll be quiet. I just wanted to give you a heads up."

"Appreciate it, roomie. You guys heading to bed? Can I watch the big TV?" He asks.

"It's all yours roomie." You laugh a little. "Goodnight."

Taehyung bids you goodnight and you head to your own bedroom, where Jimin is waiting. When you enter inside he's standing with his back to you, shirtless as he undoes his belt. The sound of the door opening he doesn't even turn to face you, merely continues getting ready for bed.

"Just wanted to let Tae know you're spending the night." You murmur as you pace over, ghosting a gentle hand against his skin.

"Oh, ok." He responds quietly.

"I'm working tomorrow, so we're going to have to get up early." You sigh.

"That's fine."

"Can I wear this to bed?" You ask hopefully, picking up Jimin's discarded tee. It smells like his cologne, it's comforting. He nods. You notice he's still acting rather stiff and unusual but you're not sure why. "Thanks Jiminie."

He slips under the duvet first, while you crawl in behind him, wearing nothing but his shirt and a thong. He lies on his back, one arm behind his head. You reach across him to flick the bedside lamp off. Even in the moonlight you can see a worried expression twisting his beautiful features.

"There's something on your mind." You state, just above a whisper. You rest your head against his warm chest and loosely throw and arm across his waist. Normally he'd nuzzle into you but his position remains unchanged.

"It's nothing." You're not sure if he even convinces himself, voice thick and quiet, something heavy underlying his words.

"You can talk to me, about anything." You assure. There's a palpable tension weighing in the room as Jimin hesitates. You can feel the tension in his body, muscles constricting slightly underneath you. He inhales as if he's about to speak but lets out a long breath instead. "Is it Jungkook? Have I been going on too much about him?"

"No." Jimin is quick to firmly interject. "No." He repeats, softer. "It's Taehyung."

Surely you hear him incorrectly. "Taehyung?" You repeat incredulously, propping yourself up to see his face, hoping this is some kind of joke. It's so absurd you almost want to laugh.

He looks at you with a frown. "Yes. It's stupid. It's nothing. Nevermind."

You soften at his words. "Your feelings are not nothing to me, Jimin."

He runs a distressed hand through his long locks. "I'm being jealous and irrational. I hate it."

"Of Taehyung? Why does Tae of all people make you jealous? I just sat and cried about my ex boyfriend to you!" You tease, hoping to at least coax a little smile from him. It doesn't work.

"Well, look how me and you got started..." He trails off, almost if he knows how awful that thought is to voice aloud.

"Jimin," You're wounded, a visceral sting within your ribcage. "Don't throw that in my face. That's not fair."

“I’m sorry! That came out weird.” He groans, frustrated at the sight of your hurt expression.

“You don’t trust me.” You point out.

He shakes his head. “I do. I told you I’m being irrational.”

“Then what’s the big deal with Taehyung?! Tell me and I can make you feel better. There is literally zero reason to feel jealousy towards my roommate.”

He seems reluctant to explain, dragging his bottom lip between his teeth, eyes locked with yours. “I know how this story ends.” He sighs. You raise a brow at him. “He’s a nice guy, you’re a nice girl. You’ll get really close, you’ll hang out all the time since you live together, then one day you and I will have a big argument, and who will be around to pick up the pieces? Taehyung.”

“- Jimin,”

“ - Who are you going to bitch about me to when you’re mad? Taehyung. He’s single right? What will stop him from making a move on you? And if you’re mad at me you might let him. Look what happened with -” He cuts himself short but you both know the word ‘Jungkook’ was about to slip out.

He looks away guiltily.

You nod quietly absorbing the information. It’s understandable, albeit borderline crazy, that Jimin feels this way. He’s not perfect, he has insecurities like everyone else but there’s two things you have gathered from this conversation. One; Jimin is a lot more sensitive than you first thought and two; he isn’t as easy going about Jungkook as he appears.

“I understand why you would think that.” You want to be assuring but your voice sounds so small. You know there is no real defence for your infidelity. Jimin looks worried, anticipating what you’ll say next. “I do think you’re getting a little ahead of yourself, I’ll be honest.”

“I know. I’m just scared.” He admits.

That takes you by surprise. “Scared of what?”

“Of losing you. Again.”

“Again?”

“This is so embarrassing,” He laughs a little but it’s humourless. “All I do is make myself look more pathetic huh? It’s no secret I’ve liked you since the day we met.”

“That doesn’t make you pathetic, jiminie.” You squeeze his hand affectionately. “It’s sweet.”

“But I’d lost you to Kook, and then when I finally had you, even though it wasn’t how I imagined, you told me you didn’t want me.”

“That’s not strictly true.” You chastise.

“You know what I mean.” He reaches out to cup your face, a delicate thumb rests on the apples of your cheek. “Things are going well now. I don’t want a repeat of history.”

“I would never do anything behind your back. You’re not Jungkook, and I’m not that person anymore.” Your words are firm, because they’re true and you mean them wholeheartedly.

“If you’re not happy. Ever, about anything, tell me.” Jimin murmurs as he pulls you close for a kiss.

“I promise I will. It’s different this time,” You whisper against his lips.

***

From: Kim Namjoon Hoseok found Jungkook. He’s fine, unhurt, just drunk and kind of emotional. He’s holing up @ Hoseok’s place until the trial date.

No news is definitely not good news when it comes to Jungkook, so even though this information is hard to hear you’re glad he is at least safe. Hoseok has always been the most responsible one out of Jungkook’s circle of friends. You know he’s likely there against his will but maybe thats for the best.

From: Y/N Thank you for letting me know. Namjoon be really careful, he’s probably going to be having withdrawal. He’s been shooting up. I don’t know what but keep his phone away from him and make sure Hoseok has his doctor’s number.

From: Kim Namjoon I know. I noticed the track marks too. Ill tell hoeseok and keep you updated.

Your head is pounding as you flop back against the pillow, tossing your phone somewhere on the bed. Jimin is sleeping soundly beside you and you wish to join him again but you know your alarm is going to ring in thirty minutes anyway. You doubt you’d get much rest in that time.

The early hours of the morning are always where you do your best overthinking. You wonder if Jungkook would have ended up on this path if it wasn’t for you. It’s likely. Maybe you just accelerated it. Maybe his lifestyle is the real culprit here. Maybe it was his fate all along.

As you stare blankly into the blue early morning hue of the room all you can hope is that this will be a turning point for everyone, especially Jungkook.

***

It’s on what you anticipate to be a regular boring Thursday when you receive two shocking pieces of news, almost within a few minutes of one another.

Firstly, the most recent job interview you had attended (for a role that seemed too good to be true, but Jimin convinced you to go anyway and on shaky, unprepared legs you went.) had left a very eager voicemail for you while you’d been waiting tables. Your hands shook as you played and replayed the message. You almost thought you were imagining the praise they were giving you.

They wanted you. Not for the role you initially applied for but as an assistant to one of their mid level designers. It was probably better for you anyway and you returned the call to accept the offer immediately.

The second call comes from Namjoon of all people and it’s with your heart thundering in your chest you answer, fearing the worst.

His voice is equal parts breathless and terrified, as if he’s walking very quickly somewhere. After getting him to slow down eventually you’re able to understand the message he’s trying to convey. Hyerin is in labour. It’s still a week and a half before her due date so the news definitely comes as a surprise.

You let out a long sigh of relief. It’s happy news.

He informs you that it’s still early stages, they’re at the hospital however so you know the baby is going to be here soon. It feels surreal and you’re not even the person who is going to be a parent in a few hours. Namjoon promises to call you as soon as he can (Hyerin’s request) and you shoo him off the phone so you can call Jimin.

“It’s been a wild day and it’s not even lunchtime yet.” Jimin laughs once you relay the news. “I’m so happy for you butterfly. You’ve worked so hard.”

You can’t stop the smile that spreads across your face at his sincerity. “Wouldn’t have been able to do it without you.” And that’s the truth.

***

Jimin arranges a celebratory dinner in your honour later that evening. He implores you to wear something nice and you can hear the glint of mischief in his voice. “Promise me nothing too upmarket or expensive Jimin.” You warn but he just laughs and assures you be ready for him to pick you up later.

You slip on a nice dress that’s slit dangerously high up on your thigh and some heels, a lot more chic than you normally would wear for a date with Jimin. His initial reaction when you swing open the front door makes you feel beautiful.

He looks dapper himself, dressed in an extremely well tailored suit, the top few buttons exposing the jewellery around his neck. He looks every bit the successful artist he is.

Several times in the car you ask him where he’s taking you but Jimin remains coy and cryptic, shushing you with a knowing smile. You’re paying attention to the route he’s taking but you’re unfamiliar with the area you’re in. Eventually the car comes to a stop in front of a high end japanese restaurant.

“Huh.” You hum, eyes raking the building as he opens the car door for you. “I love Japanese food.”

“I know, I remembered.” Jimin grins tapping the side of his temple while extending an arm for you. You grip on to the crook of his elbow. “This place is the next best thing to actually going to Japan.”

After being seated on the upper level of the restaurant, a private table in the corner with an incredible view of the city you can’t help but feel out of your depth. “Can you tell I don’t normally come to places like this?” You joke.

“Of course not.” He smiles.

“I would have been happy wherever we went, y’know. Even if it was Subway”

“I know,” He playfully rolls his eyes. “I recently sold one of my paintings at auction and made more money than I ever have in my career. Let me treat my favorite lady Next time you can treat me to a meatball sub.”

“Deal.”

“Any word from Namjoon or Hyerin?” He asks, taking a sip of the crimson liquid in his glass.

“No,” You sigh. “I’m excited for them! They don’t even know what sex the baby is.”

“I bet it’s a girl.” Jimin smiles.

“No, it’s a boy. I can feel it. You can tell by the shape of the bump.”

Jimin quirks a questioning brow at you. “Sorry, Doctor Y/N. I forgot about your expertise for a moment.” He says sarcastically.

“Apology accepted.” You play along.

“Let’s make a bet. If it’s a girl, I win. If it’s a boy, you win.”

“What’s at stake?” You question.

“If I win…” He pauses for a moment in thought. “You have to model for me.”

“For a painting?”

“Or a drawing.” He shrugs.

“And if I’m right?” You pry.

“You can say I told you so as much as you want.” He replies and you roll your eyes. It’s hardly a fair bet.

“No, if i'm correct you have to watch whatever movie I want for the next month.”

“Fine. Cruel but fair.”

“Deal!”

As expected the meal is wonderful, and you feel spoiled beyond belief, especially when Jimin toasts to you with a glass of probably the most expensive wine you’ve ever had. After dinner, instead of returning to the car he links your fingers together and pulls you in the opposite direction, citing he needs to walk off the glass of wine he had before he drives anywhere.

Jimin guides you to a nearby river that you can’t remember the name of. At night it’s lit up beautifully, the twinkling lights of the cityscape behind it only adding to the view. The weather is almost perfect and you feel utterly content.

He cages your body with his as he stands behind you, arms looping around your waist, hugging your body tightly to his. “I had such a nice time with you, butterfly.” He murmurs against your neck, before placing a few open mouthed kisses against your skin. A dreamy sigh escapes your parted lips. “Mmm, you smell so good.”

“Thank you for tonight Jimin. It was perfect.” You twist in his arms until you’re chest to chest. His eyes sparkle, reflecting the scenery behind you. His eyes lock with yours as if you’re the only thing in the universe.

Soft lips brush against yours as you cling tightly to him. Jimin’s hands slide underneath your jacket touching the bare skin of your back. He moans quietly into the kiss. “Fuck, I want to take you home.”

“Want you to take me home.” You smirk, raking your hands down his chest. He bites his lip.

“I have a gift for you first though.”

“Jimin,” You whine. “You’ve done more than enough for me.”

“Never.” He teases, stealing a few more kisses from you.

By the time you’re back at the car, Jimin is sober enough to drive and grinning like a cheshire cat. You eye him with a quirked brow. He unlocks the car with a chirp before striding to the trunk and popping it open. “Why do you look like you’re up to something?”

“Me?” He feigns innocence, clutching dramatically at his chest as if you’ve hurt him deeply. “Get in the car.” He instructs, sensing your hesitation.

You hold his playful stare for a moment before giving in and climbing into the passenger side.

The car obstructs most of the view, so you can’t see what he’s up to, although it doesn’t stop you from trying. Only a moment later he’s sliding into the driver’s side, a large pastel pink, flat rectangle box in one hand. You don’t miss the black lace bow holding the gift together. You know exactly what it’s contents are.

“Jimin…”

“For you.” He gives you a sly smile as he hands over the box.

Carefully you unwrap the packaging, revealing some of the most beautiful lingerie you’ve ever seen. “Oh my god.” You gasp. “This is…wow. Oh my god! It’s Agent Provocateur for crying out loud! It’s stunning. You must be broke after tonight.”

He laughs while you ramble on about how stunning the lacy garment is. “I’m glad you like it.”

“Thank you, thank you, thank you.” You lean across the console pecking Jimin enthusiastically several times on the cheek.

“You’re welcome, sweetheart.” He says gently. “I love seeing you happy.”

“I’m assuming the intention is for me to wear this...for you?” You suggest with a smirk.

“I said no such thing.”

“So, essentially. This is a gift for Jimin. I haven’t forgotten about your little lingerie kink.”

His blush is noticeable even in the dim streetlight. “Lingerie on you.” He corrects. “You don’t have to wear it for me. I just know you like that sort of thing.”

“How did you even know what size I am?” You query.

“Um,” Jimin, scratches the back of his neck and laughs at himself. “I may have checked the tags on your underwear.”

“Ah. sneaky.” You tease, kissing him once more. “Take me to your place before I beg you to fuck me right here, right now.”

Jimin’s eyes widen in surprise, wondering whether you're being serious or not, no doubt. But he listens anyway and does as you ask, turning the key in the ignition before peeling out of the parking space.

***

Several hours later, as you’re both about to turn in for the night, you receive the text you have eagerly been anticipating the entire day. Hyerin has given birth to a healthy, baby girl.

You nudge Jimin who is on the verge of sleep beside you, spent from the evening, heavy eyelids blinking slowly as he struggles to stay awake. “Hmm?” He mumbles

“It’s a baby girl. Look.”

It takes a minute to register in his mind exactly what you’re talking about before his eyes shoot open, mouth formed in a perfect ‘o’. You thrust your phone screen towards him, a picture of the newborn on display. “Cute.” He yawns.

“Isn’t she?” You hum in agreement, smiling down at the image. “She looks like Hyerin.”

“She’s only a few hours old, she doesn’t look like anyone yet.” Jimin laughs.

“Look at her eyes and tell me that’s not Hyerin!” You defend.

“Are we just going to pretend I didn’t win the bet?” He reminds you, pulling you close to him as soon as you put your phone away. “You owe me, butterfly.”

You nuzzle into the crook of his neck, feeling safe and secure. You can’t help but smile into his skin. “Just let me know when and where you want me.”

“How about this weekend?” He suggests, stroking your hair. “At my studio?”

“Sounds perfect.”

***

It’s only a few days later you find yourself, along with Jimin, at Namjoon and Hyerin’s apartment. Excitement bubbles in your chest at the prospect of meeting their new arrival. You’ve never really been crazy about children, however something about having witnessed the growth of this infant since day one has created a special connection with her.

“Here she is,” Hyerin gives you an exhausted smile, handing the bundle of yellow blankets over to you. The tiny face of a newborn peeking out from underneath, dark hair poking out at the top of the blankets. She seems impossibly tiny. Gently you cradle her, carefully because she looks so fragile and new you can’t quite believe it.

“Nice to meet you beautiful girl.” You coo, unable to stop a wide smile from forming on your face. Jimin sits next to you, an arm slung over the back of the couch, leaning forward so he can see her too. “It’s Auntie y/n.”

She blinks up at you owlishly and it’s amazing to you how intently she’s focusing on your face. You don’t even know if someone her age can register a face yet but it still feels magical.

“I think she recognises your voice.” Hyerin points out, smiling at the pair of you. “She’s heard it enough over the past few months.”

“Is that even possible?” You blink in surprise.

“According to some of the stuff I’ve read, yeah.” Hyerin nods.

“Does she have a name yet?” Jimin asks, eyes never leaving the baby.

“We’re still not sure,” Namjoon answers. “We were thinking Yeona, maybe.”

“It means beautiful baby. Or heart of gold.” Hyerin laughs. “It fits, no?”

“Definitely.” You breathe. “Hello Yeona.” You sing-song to see if she reacts, but she merely yawns earning a laugh from the room. “Message received, pretty girl.”

Her eyes start to flutter shut and you place the pacifier Hyerin hands to you into her small mouth. It doesn’t take long for her to fall asleep in your arms while you rock her gently.

“You’re stuck with her now, y/n.” Namjoon laughs. “It’s not good to wake a sleeping baby, you know. Sit tight so Hyerin and I can go nap for four hours.”

“Joonie!” Hyerin scolds with a laugh. He was only joking of course.

“No offense, but both of you look like you could use it.” Jimin quips.

“You’re telling me,” Namjoon groans. “She sleeps a lot at the moment, but honestly, i’m just in a constant state of worry for her wellbeing. 24/7. I haven’t relaxed even for a second in days”

“Me too.” Hyerin agrees. “Top that off with my recovery from the birth and I feel like a zombie.”

“It’ll be worth it.” You say sincerely. Namjoon and Hyerin share a look, the kind of secret exchange two people in love would have. It brings you so much happiness to see them thriving together. Silence falls between the four of you but it isn’t awkward or uncomfortable. Everyone is at ease.

A vibrating sound buzzes, followed by a shrill ring, interrupting the peace. Your phone is ringing from your handbag that sits at your feet. “Ah, I can’t get that. Jimin can you see who it is? It might be work, I don’t want to miss another call from them.”

Jimin reaches for your cellphone and his face falls at the caller id. He says nothing, merely showing you the screen that reads ‘Jeon Jungkook incoming call’. He hasn’t contacted you directly once since the breakup. A knot forms in the pit of your stomach. This can’t be good.

“I’ll call them back later.” You tell Jimin with a shake of your head. You don’t want to be the person that ruins this evening. Tactfully picking up on your tone, he silences the call before slipping his phone back into your bag.

***

Hyerin is putting the baby down for the night whilst Namjoon, you and Jimin have some coffee. Finally having your arms back to yourself you check your phone, only to feel horrified at the sheer amount of notifications. All from Jungkook.

“I need to go make a call,” You announce standing up. Jimin looks at you, worry flashing in his eyes. “I’ll be right back.”

You don’t wait for a response, choosing to instead quickly slip out the front door and into the hallway of their complex, shutting it quietly behind you. You press Jungkook’s name on your call list and wait.

It rings out, before going to voicemail. You try again.

And again.

And again until he answers on the seventh call. “Baaabyy.” He’s drunk and barely coherent. “I’m outside your apartment. Let me in.”

Fuck.

“Jungkook, I’m not home right now.” You say firmly, praying that Taehyung isn’t home either. He shouldn’t have to deal with this, it’s not what he signed up for when he agreed to be your roommate.

“Where are you? Are you at Jimin’s place?” He spits.

“No I’m with Namjoon and Hyerin.” You sigh. “I’m on my way home though. Where is Hoseok?”

“Hoseok tried to lock me up like a fucking prisoner. I don’t give a fuck where he is.”

Exasperated, you pinch the bridge of your nose between your thumb and forefinger, inhaling a deep breath. It’s frustrating to remain calm with someone who is so clearly self sabotaging. “Kook, I’m gonna come get you okay. Will you wait for me?”

“Of course baby. I’ll be - “ He hiccups. “Right here.”

“Don’t go anywhere.” You warn. “I won’t be long.”

You hurry back inside to find Jimin and Namjoon laughing about something, but as soon as their eyes land on you it dies away. “Is everything okay?” Jimin is quick to ask.

“We have to go.” You reply bluntly, cutting straight to the chase. “Jungkook is wasted, hanging outside my apartment, begging to be let in.”

“Christ.” Namjoon groans. “Where was Hoseok? He was keeping an eye on him. Apparently he was completely sober the last few days!”

“I don’t know but I can’t leave Jungkook wandering around shit-faced like that.” You share his frustration. “I’m sorry Namjoon. Tell Hyerin I’m sorry and I’ll call her later.”

Namjoon can only nod as you and Jimin scramble your things together and rush out the door.

***

Taehyung texts you on the drive over. You breathe a sigh of small relief when you realise he’s at work and won’t be home until the small hours of the morning. Still, you don’t intend to risk your living situation so Jimin agrees that the best course of action is to take Jungkook to his place. Jimin lives alone, it’s the easiest option.

“Should I come with you? Or do you want me to wait here?” Jimin asks as he parks the car.

“Stay here for now. I think he might get angry if he sees you.” You head hurts already at the prospect of dealing with that drama. Jimin gives you a solemn look before giving you the okay.

Walking up the stairs and down the hallway to your apartment, your stomach twists with dread, anticipating the condition you might find Jungkook in. You take a deep breath as you round the final corner. Thankfully, it’s not as bad as you had expected.

Jungkook, adorned in his trademark all black outfit, sits on the floor. His back is pressed flush against the wall opposite your front door. A hood covers most of his face and his arms are crossed on his chest, legs sprawled out in front of him. He almost looks like he’s sleeping.

“Jungkook?” You ask gently, crouching down beside him. He stirs slightly. You push the hood off his face and brush some of his long hair away from his eyes. “Kookie.” You repeat.

His eyes slowly flutter open and it takes a few seconds for him to focus on you. “Baby.” He grins lopsidedly, fumbling to hold you. It’s an awkward embrace given that you're not in the right position for a hug right now.

“Do you want to stand up for me?” You’re unsure how to approach telling him he’s going to Jimin’s, so for right now trepidation and caution is key. Jungkook nods. He slings an arm around your shoulder, while you slide one around his waist, letting him lean on your for support.

“Are we going inside now?” He mumbles. “...m’tired.”

“We can’t, My roommate is home.” You lie.

“Roommate?” Jungkook frowns. “Jimin?”

“Taehyung.” You correct.

“Who the fuck is that?”

“Come on, my car is downstairs, we’re going somewhere else.” You avoid his question, and he seems momentarily satisfied with your answer. “Let’s walk to the elevator.”

He doesn’t remove his arm from your shoulders as you make your way out of the building. “Are you mad at me baby?” He asks, slumping against you in the elevator.

“No. I’m not.” It’s the truth, you’re not angry. Above anything and everything you’re concerned for him.

Jimin spots you walking out the building and immediately springs up and out of the driver's seat to help you. He appears at the side of the car, opening the door to the backseat. “I’m not going anywhere with him.” Jungkook snarls, pointing obnoxiously at Jimin.

“Kookie, kookie, please - “ You beg.

“NO! You’ll take me to Hoseok’s or rehab. No.” He yells.

“I promise we won’t, Jungkook.” Jimin assures him quietly. “You can just crash at my apartment. We won’t tell Hoseok if you don’t want us to.”

Jungkook looks down cautiously at you, as if he can gauge whether Jimin is serious or not by your expression. He sways a little as he stands. “Baby girl,” he sighs dramatically. “I don’t want to go.”

“Please,” You say quietly. “I don’t want to leave you by yourself right now.”

“You want me?” He asks, his intoxicated brain clearly misinterpreting your words. That’s not exactly what you meant but if it will get him in the car and on the way to safety you’ll agree to almost anything.

“Of course. Come get in.”

He hesitates for a minute, but lets you bundle him in the car anyway. As you go to close the door, he grabs your wrist. “Noooo,” He whines. “Sit in the back with me.”

“Jungk - “

“Sit with me or I’m not going.”

You exchange a glance with Jimin who looks unhappy but nods, encouraging you to just continue playing along. When you slip into your side, Jungkook hastily and roughly pulls you into the middle of the backseat, then wraps his arms around you.

“Jungkook,” You warn, attempting to push his arms away.

“You said you’d sit with me.” He pouts, burying his face into your neck. You sigh, accepting defeat, mouthing ‘I’m sorry’ to Jimin when your eyes meet in the rear view mirror. He shakes his head ‘don’t worry’ he mouths back.

Jungkook soon falls asleep on your shoulder. His grip on you slackens a little. Using this as an opportunity you slowly roll one sleeve up his arm. In the light of the passing street lamps it’s hard to tell but there doesn’t appear to be any track marks. From his behaviour tonight he didn’t seem high; only inebriated. A threadbare silver lining, you suppose.

By the time all three of you have made it inside of Jimin’s apartment, Jungkook is just about completely blacked out. Together you and Jimin place him on the sofa. Jimin has a luxury corner couch so it’s basically like a small bed anyway. You help him out of his shoes while Jimin fetches some water and a bucket, knowing Jungkook’s tendendancy for vomiting after alcohol.

“I’m sorry,” Jungkook sounds emotional, but you know it’s the liquor talking. You perch on the side of the couch beside him.

“It’s alright.” You say kindly. “Why did you drink so much tonight?”

“I’m not allowed to do drugs, so may as well get drunk.” He grumbles, rubbing at his eyes.

You shake your head at his ridiculous logic. It’s quiet as you wait for Jimin to return, and by the time he has Jungkook is once again unconscious. As if by muscle memory from having done it so many times before, you make sure he’s laying on his side, so he doesn’t die if he vomits in his sleep.

Jimin sets down the bucket and water next to Jungkook. “Thank you.” Your voice is hoarse.

It’s silent as you head to Jimin’s bedroom together. Emotionally you feel drained. How long does this pattern with Jungkook have to repeat before something changes? Inevitably it will take its toll. Not just on Jungkook himself, not just your relationship, but every one in your social group. It hurts to see Jungkook so out of control. He always used to be so outgoing. So free. So happy.

Robotically you go through the motions of your bedtime routine, as does Jimin. Without asking, you grab his shirt to wear to bed. You finish changing before him and watch as he rakes through a drawer, pulling on a pair of pyjama pants.

You’re so lucky to have him. After everything you’ve put him through, he’s been nothing but supportive. It’s so different to how you felt about Jungkook. That all consuming passion you and Jungkook had burns bright but fades quickly. How you feel about Jimin has been a slow, steady burn. It feels authentic. Stable. Real.

“Jimin.” You begin quietly.

“Hm?” He climbs into bed next to you. “Are you okay?”

“I just wanted you to know, you’re an amazing person for doing this tonight. I don’t know many people who would go to the lengths you have for Jungkook, or for me.” You breathe, suddenly feeling very nervous. He squeezes you a little tighter. “I love you Jimin.”

“Uh - “ He pulls away, looking flustered and immediately your stomach drops. Maybe he has changed his mind.

“Oh god! I’m sorry, I stupidly just assumed you’d still be in the same place as before, and I know i’ve kept you waiting for so long. Fuck, Jimin, I’m sorry, really - “

He silences your overthinking with a press of his lips against yours. “I love you too.”

Jimin is smiling now, his big eyes almost closed with how hard he’s grinning.

“It’s a weird time to say it huh?” You laugh, kissing him again. “I don’t think I’ve ever loved you as much as I do at this moment.” You hide your face against his chest, feeling shy from your admission. His chest vibrates as he chuckles.

“I love you, I love you so much butterfly.”

“I love you. We took a long route to get here, but I’m glad we did.”

“Does this mean we’re together now? Officially? I overheard you panic when Taehyung referred to me as your boyfriend.” Jimin teases. You were not aware he heard that.

“Yes. I’m all yours.” You smile into his shirt.

He kisses the top of your head. You fall asleep in his embrace not long afterwards.

***

The digital bedside clock reads 5:03am when you jolt awake. Unsure of what startled you, you listen carefully for a noise but all that can be heard is your own heartbeat thrumming in your ears with Jimin’s soft breathing in the background.

You roll over as best you can because he’s still clinging to you (although your positions have changed) even in slumber. You press a kiss to his cheek, watching him fondly for a few moments. His perfect mouth is parted slightly and his hair is adorably messy.

Suddenly you recall Jungkook passed out in the living room. Not that you forgot about him per say, you were just distracted by Jimin for a moment. Quietly you tip toe out of the bedroom and down the hall.

Jungkook is still in almost exactly the same position as he was when you left him several hours ago. As silently as you can you sit down next to him, just to make sure he’s okay. Evidently he’s not as deep asleep as you’d presumed because his eyes flutter open at the weight of your body sinking down on to the couch.

“y/n.” He croaks at the sight of you. “Where am I? Is this your place?” He coughs a few times, his voice hoarse from lack of use.

You forgot he had never been to Jimin’s new apartment. Jimin had moved after everything went down. No wonder the surroundings were unfamiliar. He probably didn’t remember much from the previous night either.

“This is Jimin’s apartment.” For some reason you feel guilty admitting that. “Are you thirsty? Can I get you anything?”

“What?” He sits up on his elbows, looking around the room. “Did he move?” You nod. “Oh…”

“Do you remember much from last night?” You ask nervously.

“Ahhh, kind of,” He looks embarrassed, eyes darting away. “I remember wanting to see you. Going to your house. Vaguely remember hugging you in the car. That’s about it.”

“Where was Hoseok? Last I heard you were staying with him. Namjoon said you were sober.”

“Hobi’s girlfriend broke her ankle so he took her to hospital. I snuck out, even though I promised Hobi I wouldn’t.” Jungkook has the decency to look ashamed. “I am sober….I was at least. I haven’t done drugs in a long time. I guess I just got cabin fever.”

“That’s understandable,” You sigh. “You shouldn’t drink if you get in such a state. What if you had driven again!? How did you even make it to my apartment last night?”

“Walked.” He shrugs.

“Jungkook.” You hide your face behind your palms when you feel the tears begin to burn in your eyes. He doesn’t say anything. You feel him shuffle a little and then wrap his arms around you in a hug.

“Don’t cry.” He whispers.

“I can’t keep doing this. You need to get help.” You choke back a sob. “Why won’t you?”

His hold on you tightens. “I’m scared. I’m ashamed. I’m supposed to be a fun, party guy. Not an addict.”

Gently you push him away. “There is nothing wrong with needing help Jungkook. From the outside, it appears as if you desperately need it. What can I say to convince you?”

“I…”

“I’ll do anything. I’ll drive you anywhere, Jimin will drive you anywhere. God knows Hoseok, Namjoon and Yoongi will do anything for you. Take you to AA meetings, therapy, anything. Just tell me what, Jungkook, and I’ll do it.”

“Will everyone think less of me? Will you think less of me?” He asks quietly, taking you aback. “You hate me now. I was awful to you when we were together.”

“No. If anything I’d think more highly of you. It’s infinitely more difficult to take control than it is to lose it.” A lone tear escapes. “In regards to us? We weren’t compatible Kookie, but I loved you very much.”

“I still love you. I think I always will. I’m sorry I fucked up.”

“It’s done. There’s nothing we can do about the past. I’m sorry too. Obviously I care about you, which is why I’m trying my best to help.”

Jungkook nods slowly, processing everything you’ve just explained.

“I’ll do it.” He says with certainty.

“Jungkook,” You desperately want to get your hopes up, he sounds so sure.

“If you help me.”

“Of course.”

“Jimin won’t mind? I know you’re together now.” He asks. Jungkook doesn’t look angry, or even hurt. It’s worse. He looks sad.

“Jimin loves you Jungkook, regardless of everything that’s transpired. I know he won’t mind.”

“Okay.” He replies quietly.

“Stay here for the rest of the day. I’ll make you food, and we can figure out what is the right help for you. I know you felt pressured before but we’ll find what is best for you. You don’t have to do anything against your will. Sound good?” You ask.

“Thank you.” He mumbles meekly.

“It’s still early. Get some sleep.” You give him a small smile before you stand up and leave.

***

Once you return to the privacy of Jimin’s room, you get back into bed. Your boyfriend rouses at the sound of the door clicking shut, which you’re thankful for because you would feel guilty waking him. “Hey beautiful.” He says sleepily. “Where’d you go?”

“I was checking on Jungkook.” You explain. “We need to help him Jimin.”

“I know.” He sits up a little in bed, yawning.

“He promised he would take this seriously. Only if I help him.” You pause, waiting for a negative reaction but Jimin is merely patient, waiting for you to continue. “I told him we all would as long as he stays here today. He might be more receptive to help if we do it more...casually? I think he felt like a hostage at Hoseoks.”

“That’s fine. He can stay here as long as he wants. I hate seeing him like he was last night. He acts like a completely different person when he’s drinking.”

You’re instantly reminded of the physical fight the two men had had, knowing there was no way it would have occurred if Jungkook had been sober. Maybe that’s why Jimin seemed to have forgiven him so quickly.

Lacing your hands with Jimin, you squeeze his hand in reassurance. “Thank you.”

***

Jimin has the tact to remain elusive around the apartment in the following hours. It’s a smart idea to alleviate any tension that his presence may create. You shower first, throwing a hoodie of his and some shorts on before going to see Jungkook. Having spent many nights with Jimin you’re familiar with his morning routine, which is why you’re able to deduce that he’s deliberately taking a long time.

“Can I borrow your phone charger?” Is the first thing Jungkook asks you as you stride into the living room. “My phone died.”

You give him your charger, along with a cup of coffee and sit yourself down beside him. As his phone turns on you can hear the many notifications go off, god knows who he had been calling and texting last night. “How are you feeling?”

“Fuckin’ hungover.” He grimaces. “Where’s Jimin?”

“Shower.”

“Is he pissed off?” Jungkook peers at you over the rim of his coffee mug. His hands are trembling from the after affects of the alcohol.

“No. He’s worried. Everyone is.” You answer truthfully. A few moments of slightly stiff silence pass. You have no idea what is going through Jungkook’s mind at the moment. He’s frowning. “You know, when you attend your trial, if you’re in AA or anything similar it will make you look genuinely remorseful in front of the judge.”

“I am genuinely remorseful.” He mutters. “It’s not as easy as people think just to stop drinking. It’s been my lifestyle for so long now. How am I supposed to tour if I’m sober?!”

The question is rhetorical but you answer anyway. “Lots of rockstars do, you know. If you get treatment you’ll develop coping mechanisms to deal with all of that.”

He makes an agreeable sound but still appears rather skeptical.

After a lengthy discussion (which Jimin awkwardly interrupts to offer food), you manage to convince Jungkook to at least look at AA meetings with you. You promise someone will go with him to everyone one, not to babysit but to be supportive. He’s not allowed to drive at the moment so you surmise having a friend with him would be better than taking a taxi.

Jimin joins you both a little bit later with said promised food, Jungkook calls Hobi to let him know he’s safe. Even though the phone is not on speaker you can hear Hoseok yell. Jungkook simply rolls his eyes.

After he’s eaten Jungkook announces he’s going to leave and head back to Hoseoks. You want him to text you when he’s there (you’re not sure if you even believe him) but you know any amount of pressure right now when he’s this fragile could ruin everything.

The goodbye is awkward, it’s to be expected. He thanks you both, lingers for a moment and then he’s gone. He assured you both that he would text when he is going to go for his first meeting. You really hope he does.

***

Jimin makes sure not to let you forget your promise to model for him. Although the situation with Jungkook left the two of you feeling slightly off kilter for the rest of Saturday, by lunch time Sunday his lingering touches and innuendos leave little to the imagination. He kisses your neck as you’re making food, whispering: “Want to go to my studio? I believe you owe me.”

“Now?” You smile dreamily, leaning into his touch.

“We can eat first, if you want.” He nips the skin at the junction of your neck before running his tongue over the flesh and beginning to suckle. It’s going to leave a bruise, which you absolutely cannot have the day before starting a new job.

“Jimin,” You complain, pushing him off you. “I’ve got work tomorrow, I can’t go in there looking like some horny teenager who let her boyfriend play vampire on their neck.”

“Sorry.” He snickers. “I was thinking some hickeys might look pretty when I paint you. You know most live models are nude...”

“I knew this was a ploy to get me naked.” You smirk, wiping the knife you were using to cut fruit on a dishtowel. It gets tossed in the sink, leaving you hands free to spin in his arms and face him.

“Kind of,” He grins. “But I also really want my muse to model for me.”

“Naked?”

“If you’re comfortable.” His fingers begin to unbutton the oversize plaid shirt of his you’re wearing (stolen of course), until you’re exposed all the way to your navel. Plush lips travel down from your neck, leaving a trail of goosebumps in their wake. You shiver feeling his saliva meet the cool air. “You don’t have to do anything you don’t want. I think your body is art, y/n. Every inch of it.”

You gasp when he yanks down the cups of your bra, taking a nipple in his mouth. He repeats this on your other breast before gently sucking a bruise on the skin next to it. After a minute or two he pulls away to assess his work with a smirk.

“Jimin,” You pant as your hands fly to grip the counter behind you. He’s barely done anything and you’re already weak for him. “You can’t leave a mark anywhere someone might see.”

“Unless you’re going to work without clothes on, these are just for my eyes only sweetheart.” More buttons are undone as Jimin kneels on the floor before you, grasping your hips in his hands. His mouth trails to the flesh right above your hip bone where he works on forming another lovebite. “Is this turning you on, butterfly?” He asks breathlessly.

Jimin’s big eyes meet yours as he looks up to confirm what he already knows is true. When you don’t answer immediately, he strokes a thumb over your quickly dampening panties, right where your swollen clit would be underneath. “Y-yeah.” You manage to choke out.

“Mhm,” Jimin carries on rubbing you as he resumes sucking a hickey slightly above the mark he just made. After one particular harsh suck and a nip with his teeth you jolt with pleasure. “I can feel how wet you are through your panties.”

“It feels so good.” You almost whimper. “I want more. Take my underwear off.”

“No.” He bites his lip, holding back a devilish look.

“Jimin, please.” You whine. It’s not like him to tease you. “Please.”

“Nuh uh.” He shakes his head. “You’re going to be a good girl for me first.” He punctuates his words by increasing the pressure.

“I am being good.” You breath hitches when he stops. “Jimin.”

“I meant, be good and model for me.” He stands up, kissing you teasingly on the lips. “Get dressed, we are going to my studio.”

a/n: if anyone is curious, THIS is what I imagined Jimin’s apartment to be like. THIS is what i imagined the lingerie gift as. (i’m a really visual person & always love it when other writers include stuff like this). p.s the next chapter is one of the smuttiest things ive ever written oh lawd. prepare yourselves.

p.p.s the next chapter is the end :(

MASTERLIST

63 notes · View notes

miyaniacs · 5 years ago

Note

hello! i just wanted to say that i'm really proud of you for making it so far and it's honestly really inspiring to me. i've struggled with my appearence so much and i saw your requests are open, could you possibly do kuroo, kenma, and bokuto with a s/o who's insecure about being thin hc? thank you sm im advance and i hope things ease up soon 💖

Thank you baby 🥺❤️

And ok so first of all - I think people forget that in today’s society everyone feels insecure about their body even thin people- especially now I feel like thin women feel insecure about not having this ig curvy body - women are pressured so badly for having to have the perfect body - but the perfect body for women is on that is most likely not achievable without getting surgery. Also I feel like every week there is another unrealistic trend that media creates for us to have. And also men are pressured for having to be muscular if not they are not really considered manly.

Ok to the request :

Warnings : me ranting about fashion in bokutos lol

Masterlist

HC s/o who’s insecure about being thin

Kuroo

Soo when he realized how insecure you are for being thin he was confused

Like isn’t this what everyone wants to be rn?

So he asked you about it

When you’re female : you explain that you feel extremely uncomfortable for not having those curves and that you probably also don’t feel like a “women” since - “real women have curves” all those pictures you see on social media make you feel insecure for not having those ‘thick thighs’ and amazing boobs

When you’re male : you explain that you feel insecure that you’re not strong enough, that you look like a stick ( I do know more than one males that are really insecure about not having much muscle )

For both ways : you explain that you feel bad for not having anything for him to grab on while cuddling or having sex, that all your clothes don’t seem to properly fit and when you’re wearing shorts or a bikini people would think your anorexic ( actually what a girl I known struggles with - she’s just thin but people assume she has an eating disorder)

He will listen not saying anything until you’re finished

He will hold your hands and tell you that he never thought any of those things. He loves your body - you make him feel more buff haha

He also asked if there’s a reason why you don’t gain weight - like some medical condition

Also he would ask you if you want to work out with him. Since you’re thin you will easily see results soon - and you will feel more comfortable when you’re able to see those abs or the definition on your legs - and even doing sports will make you feel better because you do something

He will also help you set up a meal plan - so you will get the right amount of proteins, fats, carbs etc.

He will also make sure to show you how much he loves your body using words as : god your so beautiful / hot / jaw dropping etc.

Buys you cute lingerie too

AND right after you first talked about this he asks you to give him your phone - he goes straight on social media and unfollows all those accounts and follows ones that have a body type similar to yours.

Kenma

He loves the fact that you’re thin

He’s not the tallest and buffets gut himself so he likes the fact that he still feels able to protect you ( not that you need this but just for his ego )

You two were playing video games when the comment : god I wish I’d had this body - left your mouth while looking at one of those characters

He immediately stoppes the game and looks at you

“That’s what bothers you?” You blinks still not believing what he just heard you say

You nod and tell him sincerely that you think that you are too thin

“I love your body - and i don’t mind the fact that you’re thin? You know how much I love yo run my fingers over your rib cage ( you know this dum,dumm dummm - you say in your head when you run your fingers over some bumbs? If so that’s what he always does )

He will switch your gaming plans to cuddle time and makes sure to tell you all those little things he loves about your body - He lets you tell what you hate about it and then tells you his opinion about it

He loves the fact that HE can easily gives you piggyback rides or spins you around when you run to him and jump in his arms

The next day he will ask kuroo for some advice tho and gets some more games where the characters aren’t that unrealistically built

Bokuto

After some time even our baby owl realizes that you wear clothes that hide your BEAUTIFUL BODY??

“Babe, isn’t this shirt a bit too big?”

He finally asks and you tell him that you don’t like how you look in tight clothing

He doesn’t get why so you have to explain it to him

Female : you don’t like that you’re not curvy and that you have rather small breast - so you try to hide it in clothes that you drown in

Male : you don’t like how you your bones stick out, that your legs look like sticks and have no shape in it

So this beautiful baby - right after pulling you in his arms and kissing you - walks to your closet and gets trough you clothes

“ babe. OBVIOUSLY you don’t like your body when you don’t have anything that makes your beautiful features POP !! Get dressed we’ll go shopping now.”

Sooo at the mall he chooses all of the outfits for you and makes you put them on ( yes I belive that he has a nice and modern sense in fashion)

female :

Highwaisted dress pants, bralett and a blazer - CHECK

Oversized T-shirt dress and some combat boots / chunky sneakers to make your LEGS LOOK like they are 2m long - CHECK

Wide leg pants and some oversized T-shirt tugged in to give you some shape - CHECK

Those cute slip dresses - HELL YES

baby t-shirts & tennis skirks with HIS windbreaker- YES

Those cute square neck shirts with puffy sleeves YES !!!

He loves you in his hoodies too

With some tights OR with some wide jeans too

If you’re also on the shorter side - PLATFORM shoes. Yes there aren’t too chunky for you ( for example the puma ones with the Rihanna collab - they are like tennis shoes and actually soo comfy)

Those cute cardigans as a shirt - YES

Hny you need to live out the advantages of not needing to wear a bra !!

Obviously accessories to the MAX

Male

Oversize and layering is the KEY

Also those sweatshirts with a more stiff fabrics

Those wide light blue jeans and a simple slightly oversized t-shirt tugged in with a nice belt - YES

Wide trousers and a tighter shirt AND a loose Oversized shirt

Soo After coming home with a whole new wardrobe you look like a model.

And HE SHOWS YOU OFF SO BADLY & HYPES YOU THE FUCK UP

Calls akaashi over to make you model all your new clothes

You don’t have a choice but your ego goes up a little

Also like kuroo will but you cute lingerie

Bonus for female: will ask you non stop if you want to pierce your nippels because it looks so hot on smaller breast ( on all sizes but in my opinion esp on smaller ones )

#haikyuu headcanons #haikyuu imagines #haikyuu x y/n #haikyuu!!#haikyuu x reader #haikyuu hc #haikyuu kuroo #haikyuu scenarios #kenma headcanons #kuroo headcanons #haikyuu reactions #haikyuu requests #bokuto imagine #bokuto headcanons

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elliethesuperfruitlover · 4 years ago

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Costume Party

A/N: This is the third of the prompts that @badsext gave me, and I am very thrilled to get them out there, and see what people think. It’s going to be a Nathan x reader one, and it’ll be very spooky, I’m very happy to be writing this. I’ll also be posting two fics a week, starting with Feather Boas, so be prepared. Hope yous all enjoy!

Warnings: suggestive behavior, (nothing steamy, just nathan being himself, i have a friendship to maintain lol), mention of alcohol, cursing, insecurities

“Nathan, what the hell am I supposed to wear to Alisha’s costume party?” you yell from across your apartment, shared as of September.

“You know, you could just wear nothin’, that’d be a show, wouldn’t it?” he said, walking behind you.

“I’d like to actually have fun at the party, not be cold, thank you very much.” you said, kissing his cheek, and turning back around to your closet, trying to wrack your brain with anything. You were seriously thinking of just wearing a sheet and being a ghost, but Nathan offered to take you to Spirit Halloween. You obliged, and he drove you two over to the store, slightly baffled by the front decorations.

“Alrighty, here I go. Watch me come out 3 hours later with just candy.” you thought to yourself, putting your hands in your pockets and walking through the automatic doors, Nathan in tow.

Everything in the store was typical Halloween style. Fake spiders, fake cobwebs, skeletons, ghosts, the whole shabang. However you’d gotten your Halloween decor sorted way earlier in the month. You made sure that everything was in place, and that the candles were all facing in the correct direction (something you were particularly persnickety about). The two of you floated towards the back of the store, occasionally picking up something here and there. You had to drag Nathan away from the candy aisle, as he was just a hair away from starting to steal the full size Three Musketeers they stacked on top of each other. You were presented with a sexy ghost, a sexy nurse, and honestly just stereotypical female wear, and you were fed up. After looking at a whip that adorned one of the costumes, you walked straight to the other side of the store, where Nathan was looking at over-muscled costumes.

“It makes me feel like I’m too little to get into this shit. I know I’m a little muscly, but not like this. It makes me feel insecure.” Nathan said, folding his arms and looking towards you, eyes getting a bit teary. You’d never experienced him like this before. He was trying to be the funny, quirky person people expected him to be all the time.

“It’s alright to feel like that. Society puts pressure on all of us to fit into this box. You do have quite a lot of slack on said pressure, but you still do suffer. I like that you’re tiny. You’re also tall, it adds character to you, and I love it. I love you Nathan, that’s never going to change. No matter what you look like. Even if you cut your curls.” you say, hugging him, and kissing his shoulder. He smiled at the gesture, and offered something to you.

“You know what. How about you pick a costume from over here, and I pick a costume from over there in the lady’s section. We’ll look badass.” Nathan says, his eyes gleaming with mischief.

You giggle, and send him off to the other side of the store, where you vision him doing little voices and holding up different colored dresses to his form. You have bigger fish to fry though. The giant muscled superhero uniforms and stiff wigs were giving you nothing but anxiety. Your hands flipped through costume after costume, trying to find an appropriate one for your stature and size, finding it a bit hard as you were between a rock and a hard place trying to find what suited you best. Nothing as to where the inseam was too much, or if the shoulder pads were too intense. You were even thinking of trying to fit into some of the kids’ costumes just for the fun of it. Soon enough, though, you found out that Spirit Halloween was not going to cut it, and you knew just the place to hit up.

“Alright love, what’ve you found in this hellscape of a clothing section?” Nathan asked you, walking over while holding a bag with a costume, and from what you could see, a lot of shiny candy wrappers.

“I won’t be buying from here, but I know what I’m gonna do for the costume. Don’t worry, I’m still sticking with the “opposite gender thing” even though there’s waaayyy more than two genders.” you state, walking out of the store with a pep in your step, excited to finally do something you’d like to do, rather than what’s expected.

Nathan followed after you like a lost puppy, thrilled at what you were planning, but also because he had to go for a wee, and his bladder wasn’t treating him too well. As soon as the two of you got home, Nathan of course threw his bag on the bed, and bolted to the restroom, and you once more opened your closet, with a plan this time, throwing different artifacts onto the bed, and turning on some rock tunes. You two had 7 hours tops until the party started, and that gave you just enough time to get everything together. Nathan, poor soul, wasn’t allowed to see it, you even were having Simon pick him up from your house so that you could surprise him.

“Alright babe, I’m heading off with Simon, you sure you don’t want me to see you before I go?” he yelled through the door, and you yelled back a no, and finished up the final stitches.

“Now this is what I call a job well done.” you say, looking back at your work, and you quickly shower and do your hair, putting your outfit on, and almost forgetting your keys in your excited nature.

When you got to the Community Center, who allowed Alisha to rent for the Halloween night, was already filled to the brim with people. Cars were parked all over the place, and toilet paper was hanging from the trees in the area. You looked in the car mirror once more, right before you stepped out onto the concrete walkway, and opened the door wide for yourself, as you were one of the last people to arrive. The music was blaringly loud, and you went directly to Nathan, and you were quite surprised at his costume choice for the night as well. He decorated himself in an almost skin tight shirt, his chest very visible to your eyes. He wore a cute pleated skirt, floor-length, and of course, as it was Nathan, he put on random cat ears, and he was waiting with Simon, presumably for you. As soon as you came into view, he almost dropped his drink, most likely alcohol. He stood up, and you gave a little spin, the lapels of the suit flashing in the colored lights.

“My god, I didn’t know that my girlfriend had this much sexy potential in her. Where did you find this getup, love?” Nathan asked you, taking your hand in his arm around your waist. Even though he towered over you, you enjoyed having that slight switch of power in the relationship.

“My closet has a lot of wonders, it’s hidden so many skeletons, it had to be interesting.” you joked, sitting down, not caring to cross your legs.

Your outfit screamed “Yes, I wear the pants, but never a bra”. A beautiful plum suit, cinched at the waist, and the pants were boyfriend fit, beautifully framing your shape. You wore a white satin camisole, skinny black tie crossed on your neck, the ends dangling over your chest. In classic fashion, you wore your black Chuck Taylors, for foot support. Nathan fawned over you, just baffled at the fact that you threw all of this together in such short notice. He took you over to the punch bowl, and was staring at you in absolute love and wonder. You laughed at him under your cup, and he was left confused, and asked why you were chuckling.

“You are whipped for me, and I can prove that, as you just can’t take your eyes off of me Nathan. It’s hilarious, as it’s rough to think someone could love me sometimes.” you reply, taking a sip of the liquid in the Solo cup.

You laughed at his shocked face, and a blush coated his pale cheeks. He stayed a bit quiet for the rest of the night, except when you offered to go out for ice cream, even go for a little late night trick or treating. He perked up, and the two of you grabbed your respective pillowcases, and went out until at least 3 in the morning, until the two of you collapsed on the floor of your bedroom, Twizzlers in hand.

Masterlist

#nathan young fluff #nathan young x reader #halloween fic #spooky

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jadekitty777 · 4 years ago

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Snapshot Aesthetics

OKAY BUT FG WEEKEND? WHO’S CRAZY IDEA WAS THAT.

You better know I want to participate though xD I didn’t plan to have an entry for today but, well, things change lol

Day 1: Outfits

Rating: K

Words: 2.2k

Summary: Clover's job was simple: Get the model to pose properly, smile, and take the shot. But the new hire, Qrow, was about to throw a wrench into that simplicity... in more ways than one. [Fashion Model AU]

Ao3 Link: Snapshot Aesthetics

Snap!

The sound of his camera shutter going off was almost inaudible under the early morning hustle that had overtaken the studio. Clover inspected the shot of Elm displaying back on his LCD screen. He shook his head, calling to the stagehand, “Lower the forelights! There’s too much washout!”

“You got it boss.” She saluted, stepping off the scene to go tinker with the fluorescents.

Th telltale sound of stilettos had his head turning, seeing Willow striding over, lips pursed with annoyance. “Are we ready yet?”

“Almost.” He assured, showing her the picture. “Just a bit more tweaking on the lights and we’ll be good to go.”

She placed a hand on her hip, scanning the team critically. “Good.”

“Everything alright? You look…” He mulled over all his safe adjective options, “Unhappy.”

She sighed exasperatedly. “Qrow is causing a bit of a ruckus back in dress. Won’t let Kali even do his makeup.” She pinched the bridge of her nose. “I don’t know what I was thinking, listening to Taiyang.”

“It’s probably because the new guy’s pretty.” And related to Raven, he thought but didn’t dare utter the runway model’s name aloud. If he did, then it would make his manager think of her ex-husband and Raven’s agent, Jacques Schnee. That was a nasty pandora’s box he’d rather keep closed.

Nevertheless, it certainly wouldn’t be the first time she hired someone simply based on an affiliation they had to someone in Jacques’ team, thinking it as some retroactive way of getting back at him. Taiyang himself was one such decision, also ironically due his connection with Raven. Though, he’d heard the two’s relationship had been more… carnal in nature.

The plus was, Taiyang had worked out great. He was handsome and jovial and easy to direct on set. Clover’s only hope when he learned of the new hire was that the same could be said for Qrow; but, it was sounding like he had his twin sister’s notorious diva-like personality, if Willow’s frustration was anything to go by. Which meant he was in for a long day.

“Light check!” Elm called, flexing both arms proudly like a muscle builder.

He snapped the shot, then nodded at the quality. “Perfect!”

Willow swiveled, heading for the door. “Let’s get started then.”

Over the course of the seven years Clover had worked for Trendy magazine, he’d discovered that each fashion designer had a specific ‘taste’ they were going for when it came to showing off their line-up and he’d learned to pose the models accordingly to keep their clients happy and coming back for each issue. So, he kept certain things in mind with each designer’s desires, like how Sienna preferred her poses to be as dynamic and wild as possible and Camilla wanted proper posture and a bit of elegance.

Unfortunately, today’s clothing line was from Roman and Neo. Which meant balancing the two designers’ conflicting requirements of flamboyance and subtlety into one picture. It tended to lead to a lot of small changes for limb placement and expression before he ever even rose his camera.

So, it tended to be a relief when the snap sounded off and he said, “Alright, you’re done!”

“Oh, thank god!” Tai slumped over immediately, rolling out his shoulders. “I think my neck has a crick in it.”

Clover snorted. “Alright drama king. Go take a break.” He turned towards the doorway, calling, “Who’s next up?”

He heard Kali’s faint, “Get in there. And stop messing with your hair!”

A gruff voice he didn’t recognize replied, “Yeah, yeah, yeah.” Before Qrow Branwen walked into the room and stole his breath away.

Though he’d joked before, Clover hadn’t actually known what the man had looked like. He rarely did see new models before their first shoot. But now that he was, it had to be said that maybe Willow had indeed hired Qrow simply for his beauty. In almost every way, he was like a softer version of his sister. Where her skin was striking alabaster white, his had more of a welcoming ivory tone. Where her eyes were bright scarlet, his were a gentle vermillion. And where her hair was an ink black, his held streaks of dusty grey that somehow was just enough to make him appear refined, but not old.

Combine that with Roman and Neo’s classy “modern early-1900’s” style, and he looked absolutely dazzling. It was one of their simpler pieces, but dress had made sure he wore it well, especially with the plain, long-sleeved, white dress shirt that someone had decided to undo the top few buttons off to frame a cross necklace hanging sideways. Pulled over that and adding some muted color was a double-layered vest that buttoned from the bottom of the ribs down. The inner layer was a slate grey while the outer layer was a deep charcoal and had a tasteful embroidery design flowing down the sides. The matching dark grey slacks were fairly standard but nicely fitting to the man’s ridiculously long legs. Completing the picture were some shiny cap-toed black dress shoes.

“So uh, how do you want me?” Qrow asked, fidgeting with the cross-shaped cufflinks of his shirt.

Splayed across my bed. Clover shook himself of any indecent thoughts, nodding towards the set that mimicked an old parlor room. “Center stage, leaning back on the table.”

He nodded, crossing the room.

As they passed each other, Tai offered a thumb’s up and a cheery, “Good luck!”

The little half-grin Qrow offered his friend left Clover floating.

Not that the other man was going to need any well wishes, as he’d decided on something fairly simplistic. As Qrow took position, he directed, “Alright, I want you to rest your hands on the table, in view. Keep your fingers spread out.”

“Like this?” He settled them by his hips.

“Mm no. Spread your arms further apart. Position your hands the other way, pointing opposite directions. Yeah – like that! A little more for the right hand. Relax your shoulders more. No, no not that much.” And on and on it went, as Clover altered each little angle and body part until he had the exact position in mind. Yet, despite the ease of what he was asking for, Qrow’s inexperience meant he had to spend twice as long getting things just right.

It quickly became clear by his 60th order that the older man was growing a bit exasperated.

Clover eyed him up and down. Hummed thoughtfully at the position of where his ankles crossed, the toe of one dress shoe pointed down. “Okay, tilt your left heel just a bit more.”

“Is all this really necessary?” Qrow grumbled, trying not to move anything else but his foot.

“When the client is picky, yeah. And stop clawing your fingers. Keep them flat.”

The other man breathed in and out slowly, carefully resting down his hands.

He gave him another once over. Frowned.

The tension he could easily see doubled as Qrow demanded, “What now?”

“Maybe we should try something different.” He considered.

The words were met with Qrow groaning out, “You got to be kidding me.”

And Willow cutting in, “Go with it. We got to get this shoot done before noon!”

He glanced at his wristwatch. Shit, was it really almost eleven? He still had four other designs to go. “Yeah, alright. Qrow, just try to relax your muscles a bit.” He rose his camera. “Alright, now smile.”

He did, stretching it as big as he could.

Clover looked at him over the lens, raising a brow. “I said smile, not look like you’re trying to imitate clown make-up.” Ignoring the other’s sarcastic laughter, he mulled it over, then snapped his fingers. “Ah, I know! Give me the same one you gave to Tai when you first walked in.”

He could tell it wasn’t quite right when it didn’t have the same cloud nine effect on him as before, but with the clock ticking in his head, he took the shot.

“Alright, that’ll do.” Clover said.

“We’re done?” Qrow asked, not moving an inch, as if worried he’d change his mind.

“Yep. You’re free as a bird.”

That earned him a real laugh. “That was awful!”

For the hell of it, he took another shot.

There was always such a sense of relief when Clover submitted the photos to processing. From there the team would do whatever touch ups were necessary before it went in for print. Normally, the rest of his day was done, but he had another engagement at a rally across town that would keep him busy well into the evening. So, he found himself stepping into the break room, intent on grabbing a cup of coffee and heading on his way.

He was surprised to find Qrow there, huddled in one of the corner tables. He was dressed down, back in his casuals, but still managed to make a t-shirt and some slacks look like runway material. They met gazes briefly, before the elder man’s eyes dropped back to his phone, not saying a word.

Already short on time, Clover was content to leave it like that, but as he finished mixing his coffee together, guilt seeped in. If they were going to be working together, then one of them had to take the first step and it was much harder for the new guy to take it.

“You did good today.” He spoke.

Qrow scoffed. “You kidding? I was a disaster.” He groaned, running a hand through his hair. “I’ll be lucky if they ask me to come back.”

Ah. So, he wasn’t a snob - he was insecure. Clover could work with that.

“Ah come on. It wasn’t that bad.” He crossed the room, turning the opposite chair sideways and falling into it. “You’re just a little stiff. A few more of these and you’ll relax.” He paused, then added, “Oh, and take it a little easy on the people in dress.”

“They were trying to poke my eye out! Whoever invented eyeliner is a demon.”

He guffawed heartily. “It’s not that bad.”

Qrow sighed, ruffling a hand through his hair. “Still, I don’t know what I was thinking, letting Tai convince me to take this job.”

Seemed Tai was doing a lot of that lately.

“I’m not a model. That’s my sister’s gig. And…” Qrow gestured to himself. “I mean, look at me.”

“Oh yeah, I’m sure it must get tiring getting all those calls from Mr. Universe asking you to come reclaim your crown.” He countered.

“Tch, if anyone’s got a crown to go reclaim, it’s probably you.” A second later, he seemed to realize what he said and hid his face in his hand. “Oh my god, I didn’t just- I’m sorry, that was inappropriate.”

Clover couldn’t stop grinning. “Relax gorgeous. You’re in the right business to be making comments like that.” He took a sip of his coffee. “Don’t feel so bad, either. You’re not the only one self-conscious around here. Winter? Breaks out before every shoot. James? Has a scar right here.” He ran a finger above the line of his right eyebrow. “And by now, we’ve got to be giving Tai a complex with how much gets altered in processing.”

“He certainly had a lot to say about last month’s issue.”

“Well, you know, we gotta follow those trends and freckles are in.” He was sure there was a lot of talk on the questionable ethics of digitally changing people’s appearances to portray an unobtainable beauty, but it was a topic he wasn’t too interested in engaging with. In the end, it all just came down to the paycheck and keeping people’s jobs. Because if a model couldn’t sell the clothes they were wearing, then they weren’t going to get to keep modeling them.

Qrow leant back, crossing his arms. “Wonder how much they’ll change about me.”

“Well, they’ll definitely take out those cute wrinkles you get around your eyes when you laugh.”

“I wasn’t laughing?”

“Not in the first shot. But I may have…” He shrugged sheepishly. “Taken another one, right at the end? You looked more natural.”

Qrow blinked. “Well. Alright then. Guess that’s why you’re the expert.” His gaze drifted past Clover’s shoulder at about the same time he heard the footsteps. “Hey Tai. All done?”

“Yeah.” The blond replied as he stopped at their table, eyeing him suspiciously. “Hopefully the company flirt wasn’t giving you trouble.”

“Oh sunshine,” Clover drawled, playing it up as he bat his eyelashes at the other man. “I hope you know you’re my one and only.”

He snorted, rolling his eyes. “Save it for the guys actually swinging your way.” He nodded to his friend. “Come on, we better get moving if we want to get the girls on time.”

“Yeah, yeah.” Qrow stood. “It was nice meeting you Clover.”

“Same here. Looking forward to working with you.” He replied sincerely. A pleasant little warmth tingled through him when the sentiment earned him an adorable smile.

As he watched him go, Clover cast his earlier worries aside and decided that this truly was the beginning of a beautiful relationship.

#clover ebi #qrow branwen #fair game #fairgameweekend2020 #rwby #fanfiction #Chase Firekitten's Tale

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fallingin-like · 5 years ago

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november 30

one way or the other (or maybe neither) by @nakasomethingkun [requested by @foxsoulcourt and @sig66]

see which other fics i’m reviewing this month! / my review request post!

this is an absolutely amazing exploration of neil’s sexuality and what it means within the context of his and andrew’s relationship. with the best description of demisexuality i have found in a fic, everybody needs to read this immediately.

i loved this so much, not just because i’m a fan of everything you write, but because how you portrayed neil in this. so much of what you wrote is something that i can relate to and i think that’s so significant because there is so little acespec representation out there.

parts that really stuck with me:

”neil had kept mum, and when he had been asked about his opinions, he had shrugged and said, ‘they’re both pretty good-looking, i guess.’” oh, this is a big mood

”the thing is, being called gay doesn’t bother him at all, it’s just - he doesn’t think it’s something that fits him correctly” !!!

”but his sexuality hasn’t been a concern for him” i think this is interesting, mostly because i wonder if it’s like this for a lot of people who identify as acespec. i definitely felt this way, always assuming that i would understand ‘when i get older’ and then just continuing to believe that eventually i would feel like that.

”the blow of his mother’s hands and the sting of her words had pummeled any sense of curiosity out of him, but he doesn’t think she extinguished his sexual desire. he thinks that he never had any in the first place” YES! YES! EVERYBODY NEEDS TO READ THIS SENTENCES. this is so wonderful for so many reasons. it shows that his demisexuality isn’t one of the ways that his mother ‘broke him’. it demonstrates that sexuality is something intrinsic to somebody, not something that can be shaped and changed if someone tries hard enough. yes, you can ignore it or act against it, but it doesn’t change how you feel.

”the thing is, even with andrew, neil hadn’t initially thought about it in a sexual way” yeah

”and then he had realized how beautiful andrew is” this is so soft!!!

”the thing is, he can objectively tell who is pretty and who is good looking… he had a good long look at matt and nicky and a few other boys, just to see if he felt any semblance of attraction to them. he didn’t, and he still doesn’t. girls, too, he supposes, are nice to look at, but he doesn’t ever think about doing anything romantic or sexual with any of them” okay, sorry for copying basically the whole paragraph, but this is so perfect. to me, it feels like you’re really validating neil’s sexuality

”a metal tab bounces off his cheek” LOL I LOVE IT WHEN ANDREW DEMANDS NEIL’S ATTENTION

”he’s had enough of assuming a different identity and playing a fictional character, thank you very much” ohmygoodness NEIL

”andrew burrows his feet further under neil’s thighs, trying to leech off more warmth” THIS IS THE CUTEST SENTENCE THAT HAS EVER BEEN WRITTEN (also this is me in the winter anytime i sit next to someone)

”he’s still watching neil, slurping on his beer loudly, probably on purpose, because it gets neil to meet his gaze and arch an eyebrow in question” andrew likes to pretend he doesn’t care about things, but in reality, he’s so so curious and i love that neil is able to see past that haha

”neil counts it as a win; andrew can usually hold out in silence for much, much longer” andrew really cares about neil and it shows! he’s not as hesitant to hold back and expresses his opinion more often with him

”neil would have been able to keep calm if not for how andrew presses neil’s hand flat against his chest and lets go; a sign of trust. neil’s mind goes into overdrive” neil, straddling andrew: super calm, neil, being shown a sign of trust: spontaneously combusts from all the feelings

”this has become slower, much gentler - gentler than two people with so many jagged edges are supposed to be capable of” oh, this is so wonderful. i love the wording that you used

”but andrew’s heart beats steadily beneath neil’s palm, thud thud thud, and neil understands this, even if he doesn’t quite understand labels and sexual orientations and the concept of being attracted to other people” YES THIS IS WONDERFUL

”neil must have been quiet for too long, because he sees the bob of andrew’s throat as he swallows, hard, his jaw stiff” oh

”this, too, is something neil thinks about, how andrew lets him see these little shifts in his expressions, rare and almost undetectable as they are” aghhh seeing the growth in these boys? i feel like a proud mother

”suddenly curious and anxious” neil ;-;

“andrew admits, voice sedate” something about the words that you choose really guides me in how i read this sentence, i can better understand what is saying through his tone

”andrew himself isn’t unaffected; while his face remains unmoved, his hands are clenching and unclenching at neil’s sides” i don’t know, i just love it when we see andrew outwardly react to things. it’s so rare

“it’s one thing for neil to acknowledge how attuned he is to andrew and another for andrew to point it out” i love this sentence, and really the whole content of this conversation. neil is bringing up his insecurities and andrew is affirming him. saying that he believes him when so many people have denied him that. it means so much and i’m grateful for a fic that really takes the time to fully flush this out. i think that a lot of other fics ignore or only mention demiseuality in passing and that’s understandable (sometimes it’s not relevant to the plot to do more than acknowledge it and sometimes people just don’t know about the ace spectrum) but it’s so important to have this representation because there is a canonically demi character in the series!! that’s so huge

”andrew’s hand returns to his cheek, and he meets andrew’s eyes, moored” i love the word moored (or unmoored).

”the thing is, even though he likes the physical aspect of their relationship, there are times when he doesn’t like the heat tugging at the bottom of his belly, the manifestation of desire” this isn’t what my own experience is like, but it’s so interesting to see how other people feel, what kinds of experiences they have and i think this kind of knowledge is really valuable in understanding how people work and what motivates them

”if there is one thing about his mouth that he appreciates, aside from granting him the ability to verbally eviscerate his enemies” NEIL OH MY GOODNESS

”on the days that andrew can’t stand to be touched, neil is content to simply sit next to him” i feel like i’ve read things like this before, but i’ve never appreciated fully how neil’s sexuality complements andrew’s touch aversion in a way that shifts the dynamics of their relationship. andrew is allowed to be the one to initiate everything and that’s so so important to him

”i don’t understand how somebody could look at another person and say they’re hot, or that they would like to sleep with them if given the chance. it just doesn’t work that way for me” i do not think that i have ever fully related to a paragraph more than i relate to this one.

”there is a flicker in andrew’s expression, a water ripple” this is a beautiful sentence

”andrew empties out a shuddering breath. ‘it is the same for me,’ he says, so very quietly, like he is afraid… ‘i would not have done this with anybody else.’” I LOVE THIS. love the wording you used and the lack of contractions for andrew’s dialogue, it feels more impactful and changes the way that i read it. and i am so so invested in the idea of andrew being on the aro/ace spectrum, thank you for bringing this up!! (i personally think he might be demi-romantic, i can’t imagine him being able to easily form a relationship with anyone else given his intensity and his reluctance/difficulties trusting)... what are your thoughts?

having this fic review as my last one for this month feels really fitting to me. you’re definitely one of my favourite authors and i really enjoy everything that you write. in addition, you’re so so lovely and kind and sweet that i am so glad to have the chance to appreciate your writing.

this fic is intensely personal, for the characters, for you, and for me as a reader. there is so much still for me to learn, but to read this and see myself in the text, to realise that there are other people who feel the same way as i do about this topic? i can’t come close to describing how important it is, how it makes me feel. the book series is really close to my heart for many reasons, but a big one is because it introduced me to asexuality, and based on the interactions i’ve had, it has attracted many others like me. this fic is so special for me because it really articulates and clarifies neil’s sexuality in a way that the series didn’t. the insight that you provide is something i think everyone should be exposed to. it might make people more understanding and compassionate. there was a part that reminded me of something i read on aven that says “[demisexuality] is often mistaken as an admirable choice rather than an innate orientation” and i think you did such a good job explaining this in this fic.

as with all of your writing, i love your characterization, the way that you have the characters move, speak, and interact. the descriptions that you use are beautiful. i think one of my favourite things about the way that you write is that every sentence has purpose. it’s all there to do something, whether it be describing the environment, setting the tone and atmosphere, displaying characters attitudes, personalities, and behaviours, or moving the plot along. i am definitely guilty of skim-reading a lot and come across a lot of content that contains what i consider to be superfluous sentences/words. but with your writing, i am always careful that i don’t miss a thing. there are so many little details that you include that add to the overall feeling that i experience while reading, but they’re not noticeable if you aren’t looking for them. i think that takes a lot of talent, but more importantly, a lot of skill. when you are able to produce writing that comes across as effortless, but you can’t quite pinpoint why? that’s something that i think is really special. anyway, thank you so much for writing this fic!!!

#one way or the other (or maybe neither)#aftg fic review #raelle writes

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