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redroseinsanity · 6 years ago

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Late Night Fever Dream

Pairing: Iwaizumi Hajime/Oikawa Tooru

Tags: Ramen Shop AU/Ramen chef! Iwa/Astrophysicist! Oiks/Fluff/mild angst/copious mentions of ramen

Summary:

A love story charted by the stars and ramen receipts.

Iwaizumi makes Oikawa fall in love and ramen in pretty much the same breath.

Hajime peered up at the trails of muddled pink curling around rapidly darkening clouds, fingers absentmindedly peeling beansprouts in preparation for the next day. It was probably going to rain and while the little awning covering the seats in front of the ramen stand were sufficient to shelter anyone sitting there, he highly doubted anyone would brave the rain just to eat at the cheerfully lit stall.

A blessing in disguise, he concluded, because now he had time to prep ingredients for the next day so that his father would have less to do. A small grin quirked up at the corner of his mouth as he deftly flicked beansprouts into their containers.

People commented that he inherited his stubbornness from his father and he could see why, for the moment the doctors had deemed the old man semi-recovered and doing well, his father had insisted on coming back for the afternoon shift at his ramen stall.

The smirk edged into a grin as Hajime recalled his father waving his arms around with more vigour than he had shown in the past six months and declaring brashly that he would make a comeback to the stall. Not that Hajime objected, of course, the long working hours were definitely taking their toll and rubbing another knot of muscles at the base of his neck, Hajime could admit that he was grateful for the chance for a break.

“Yahoo~,” Hajime startled and was instantly grateful he’d been holding only beansprouts and not a knife because he’d mostly likely have had cut off a finger given his jumpy response to the greeting that broke through his thoughts.

Turning to the seats facing his little kitchen area, he was faced with a ridiculously handsome man. A ridiculously handsome man who was waving at him and smiling very charmingly. Hajime scrambled for a greeting as his gaze took in something like a Greek statue brought to life.

The customer was all high cheekbones and perfectly tousled hair, his neck and shoulders carved in clean lines and set in the sunset’s shadows that shifted behind him.

Oh my God, Hajime, don’t go gaga over a good looking customer. Be professional! Wiping his hands on a damp cloth, he regained his composure.

“Welcome! Sorry, I didn’t think anyone would come because of the rain,” Hajime nodded at the chestnut haired man, silently noting the work of a few odd raindrops on the customer’s light blue shirt. The customer laughed, a light, tinkly kind of laugh that both cut Hajime’s air supply and yet, made him furrow his brow because it sounded so… Rehearsed.

“Psh, rain won’t stand in the way of me getting to some good food! I’m starving, Ramen-kun! I’d like a shio ramen, please!!!”

Hajime blinked twice, processing.

“What.”

The Unfortunately Attractive Weirdo (as Hajime had begun calling him in his head) widened his eyes, looking unfairly adorable and propped his head on his hands. Again, Hajime was struck by how cute this guy was and yet, how underneath it all lay a hint of pretence.

“What, Ramen-kun?” And then he, oh god, he fluttered his stupidly long eyelashes and Hajime nearly forgot what he was miffed about for a few seconds. But it was too glaring for Hajime to ignore and letting some annoyance seep into his tone, he assumed a neutral face.

“What did you call me?” He narrowed his eyes because this guy was almost agitating enough for him to forget how handsome he was. Almost. And there it was again, the tinkly laugh that Hajime was sure to be engineered specifically to enamour the listener (definitely not because it was doing an admirable job at enamouring Hajime).

Hajime never had much patience with insincere people and the time spent manning his father’s ramen stand had forced him to grow more tolerant, or at least better at handling them. But he sniffed out bullshit a mile away and as painfully attractive as this man was, Hajime refused to stand for or be made a fool of by his showy insincerity.

“Ramen-kun!!!” the Unfortunately Attractive Weirdo clasped his hands together and smiled prettily, “I didn’t know how to address you so I just picked something! I didn’t want to be rude after all.” His voice lilted with mischief and Hajime caught a glimmer in the other man’s dark brown eyes. I’m not going to be caught up in your games.

“Iwaizumi,” He caught and held those dark eyes steadily, keeping his voice on an even keel, “Please call me Iwaizumi.” For a second, that brilliant façade flickered and Hajime witnessed something human, something like genuine delight run down his face like a water droplet sliding down a glass window.

Then the perfect smile and lowered lashes were back in place again and Hajime practically heard the ‘bang’ of shutters as he lost sight of the Unfortunately Attractive Weirdo behind this sleek, glamorous exterior. Sighing, Hajime turned to prepare the dish and then paused.

“Um,” he mentally debated with himself for a split second before throwing caution to the wind and facing the slightly surprised looking customer, “If you’re starving, why not order the tonkotsu ramen? It’s rich and filling which would be more suited to your current appetite…” He trailed off, taking in the other man’s slightly stunned look. Pink lips just parted and his eyes were no longer gleaming and playful but mildly surprised with just a dash of vulnerability.

It was gone in a second as he recovered quickly, waving an elegant hand flippantly as another bright smile was flung at Hajime.

“Ah! It’s only because my stomach is very delicate when I’m stressed, and I tend to get gastric very easily so I have to eat light things, for the sake of my fragile health!” Overly dramatic near the end, the Unfortunately Attractive Weirdo smote his brow and partially collapsed on the countertop, peeking up at Hajime with cheeky brown eyes.

Suppressing a chuckle, Hajime raised an eyebrow and managed a cool “I see” before heading back to prepare the ramen. Working in relative silence as he sliced the chashu and ladled the broth onto freshly cooked noodles, he decided to file this away under “Strange Customer Encounters” to tell his sister about some time.

But it seemed that while Hajime was ready to move past this strange encounter, the universe was not. As he sprinkled chopped spring onions over the piping hot bowl of ramen he heard in a crystalline voice behind him, slowly and deliberately:

“Eeewahyeezooomeeee.”

Read the rest on AO3

#haikyuu!!#haikyuu fanfiction #iwaoi #iwaoi fanfiction #iwaizumi hajime #oikawa tooru #ramen shop au #ramen chef! iwa #astrophysicist! oiks #redwrites #haikyuufanfics

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plunnies-n-shit · 4 years ago

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It Takes A Village

So. I think it happens something like this:

During the Second Shinobi War, Uzushiogakure falls.

Kiri and Iwa band together, and Danzo interferes so that by the time Konoha realizes that the Village Hidden in Whirlpools is under attack they have already fallen.

The Yondaime Uzukage is Uzumaki Arashi, a young man of eighteen, close cousin of Uzumaki Kushina. He gathers as many of his people he can grab, some hundred and fifty or so civilians, genin, chunin, and jonin, in the center of Uzushio and pours what remains of his chakra into the transportation seal uzumaki mito had carved for this very purpose.

but one man, even an uzumaki, isn't enough to send so many people such a long distance. Instead, the survivors of Uzushio end up in Rice Country. They walk for days to reach the borders of Fire Country, where they think they'll be safe--

--only for Danzo's men to turn them away.

Most of them scatter to the winds. only a handful try again to reach konoha, when the word finally reaches them that the Yondaime Hokage is looking for any survivors of uzushio. At that point, most of the survivors are disillusioned with their sister village. there was no help in their greatest time of need, why is there suddenly help now?

But a few remember Kushina with great fondness, and they know whoever she married must be a good man, and so they pack up their new lives and turn their feet towards konoha.

Years pass. People forget, when it's not brought to their attention all the time, that some of the people who live among them once belong to a different village. They are strange rituals, maybe. strange gods. strange habits. but when you live in a shinobi village, you kinda learn to take strange things in stride. maybe their hair is a strange color. Maybe they wear their spirals with a bit more pride. But they're Konoha nin now. Konoha civilians.

(Konoha Anbu. Konoha merchants. Konoha.... ramen stand owners.....)

And then Madara unleashes the Kyubi. Minato dies. Kushina dies. And Naruto, little, precious naruto, prince of leaves, prince of deep water--

goes to the orphanage.

because of politics. because of fear.

because the sandaime is a coward.

and the once-people of uzushio remember how no help came when Iwa and Kiri stood in their village. How they were turned away at the borders of Fire Country. How Konoha forgot what should have been their greatest shame.

Snake elbows and extorts her way onto Naruto's Anbu guard rotation. Anko doesn't even like kids, and she likes babies even less, but she knows that the leak came from Danzo in the hopes of pushing Naruto into his hands by building animosity among the civilians and she's not going to let that happen, even if she can do nothing for the way most civilians seem determined to treat naruto like a little monster instead of like a child.

(Konoha's orphanage goes through three overseers in as many months. The fourth may be harsh and withholding at times, but she does not raise a single hand to a single child, much less naruto.)

Teuchi and Ayame make the first bowl of ramen free for any child, coax Naruto in with promises of a hot shower and hot food and lessons on how to make noodles, how to make broth, how read and write and do math and manage money and balance books.

Growing up, Naruto's parents are fishermen and women who teach him how to shape suiton chakra to push and coax fish into baskets. They're farmers who use doton to turn the soil and encourage healthy roots, chefs who use katon to expertly heat ovens and stoves to perfect temperatures, blacksmiths who use futon to stoke their smelters and fires. They’re jonin who disguise training as fun games, and Anbu who appear only when no one else is around to teach Naruto how to form hand signs and control and contort his chakra into a needle-fine point.

His parents are dozens, civilians and shinobi and anbu, once-people of uzushio who remember that it takes a village to raise a single child.

And, somehow, out of a graduating class of civilians and clan heirs and Sasuke, naruto ends up being the most well-adjusted child of the bunch.

#q's plunnies #It Takes A Village #naruto #uzumaki naruto #konoha #konohagakure #uzushio #uzushiogakure #worldbuilding

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muwur · 4 years ago

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snapchat headcanons

✧ hc’s ✧ for using snapchat w ur boi toi ft. the pretty setter squad

❧ gn reader

✎ 3.1k words

a/n: kinda a combo of how they use sc and the kinds of snaps they send you! along w wat u send them, and uh... dating stuf n shenanigans? texting/snapping habits? my fantasies? IDEK ANYMORE EOFHEFJ

this was born from the recesses of my mind , which desired nothing mor than snapchats from suga , us sending cute selfies , others bein dumb n chaotic , no context videos , n him snapping me photos of some mangoes on sale he said he’ll buy for me DXX it’s too late for me now

doing research on hq bois and surfing thru sc features (im just now realizing theres quite a bit?? im hoping i address most of them at some point lolol) instead of real life tings aHHhhhHAHA

requests: open! will be working on a suga one i got, dw, requester!

sugawara

✧ sends good morning and good night snaps

✧ so he’s rlly good at keeping streaks, probs has the longest ones (one of them being y’alls streak)

✧ posts tidbits of volleyball practice on his story every once in a while

✧ snaps you pics of his sleeping teammates when they’re coming back to school after a long day of matches , adding a single ‘❤️’ as a caption

✧ he will also create colorful masterpieces on all of them

✧ gives daichi a santa beard, tanaka a squiggly stache (i imagine it to look like spongebob n patrick’s seaweed ones now that were mEN), n kageyama sum angry brows,,, wait he already has them lolol u good der kags

✧ posts a picture of you when you’re hanging out, captioning it: “🥰“

✧ has conversations with you purely via snaps

✧ ranges from casual chats and checking up on u to crackwhoring ( ** indicates the photo, while the “” quotes indicate the caption, all snaps are italicized, otherwise its regular dialogue)

✧ suga: *peace sign* “hey sweetheart, how r u?”

✧ you: *pics of homework* “ahh, drowning in school ;-; i cant wait for this week to be over fghjkl”

✧ suga: *close up with :o on his face* “let’s study together tmrw!”

✧ or

✧ suga: *complete darkness* “its 3 am n i cant sleep”

✧ you: *the top half of your head, laying on a pillow* “ ;( aw babe. do u want me to send something to help u sleep?”

✧ suga: *still in darkness* “y u still up?? go sleep. n 🥺 yes pls”

✧ you: *snaps pics of feet* “that’ll be 50 bucks, pay up”

✧ suga: *darkness remains* “can we make a trade instead? i promise to make it worth ;)”

✧ ok now u BOTH cant sleep (im sry my crackheading be acting up around 2am eeryday, i stan a mischievous suga--)

✧ video chats (in the darkness lol) instead until you both pass out (im not in luv u r 😭)

✧ super down to take filtered selfies w you

✧ does all the silly ones with you (things like ’angry face’ or the frog one)

✧ but also rlly digs lookin cute with you using some heart crowns, y’all an aesthetic (n crakhead) duo fosho

✧ def subscribes to life hacks and tries them out himself, has a 50% success rate

kageyama

✧ doesn’t rlly use snapchat too much

✧ but when he does

✧ will either send you a picture to indicate he’s at volleyball practice (wow wat a sexi lookin gym floor)

✧ or some random picture of whatever he’s doing at the moment (*drinking milk*)

✧ this is mostly in order to save streaks

✧ he’s so bad at streaks

✧ “why does it matter?? what’s the point of sending just black screens or whatever’s in front of you at the moment??”

✧ can’t keep a consistent streak for more than 3 days and also doesn’t care (until hinata challenges him to see who can have the longer one)

✧ when you send him videos of him playing, he really focuses on them to try to improve his technique. asks you to send those vids to him (assuming u saved them, which u did)

✧ but when you look over his shoulder when he’s watching a video and give him some compliment (“i recorded at the perfect moment! that was a really good set, kageyama!”), he gets a bit flustered

✧ gets even more flustered but pretty happy whenever you post videos on your story showing karasuno winning some points with captions like:

✧ “footage of the legendary quick >.>” or “karasuno crows flyin high!” or “these bois make my heart 😭 im so proud”

✧ you WILL catch him off guard in photos, using filters that surrounds his head w/ emojis like 🥺💖🥰💘

✧ you also put these on your story (to his dismay)

✧ ppl comment on these mor than anything else (n for those who dont rlly kno kageyama, theyre kinda surprised to him like this)

✧ hinata snickers “hey kageyama you look pretty good here--”

✧ takes some selfies with you, mostly cuz you want them

✧ saves them after u send them over (n secretly cherishes them)

✧ occasionally watches his subscriptions, they’ll usually involve sports, mostly volleyball (who woulda guessed)

✧ you use his bitmoji to test out random facial expressions you would never see him wear

✧ you: “can you smile and wink like this? act like you’re the obnoxious charming guy in a shojo.”

✧ will actually attempt, but it looks so bad that you die inside and he never wants to try again cuz of ur laughing outburst (you: “😭😭 bb im sorry i couldnt help it”)

oikawa

✧ literally sends you anything and everything

✧ morning bathroom selfie to show off how good his hair came out that day, saying:

✧ “he has risen”

✧ or “i woke up like this”

✧ and my favorite, “you’re lucky you get this content for frEE”

✧ selfies with iwa, who just looks annoyed and exasperated at the camera

✧ sends you pics of his lunch and snacks (“bet u wish u had milk bread too”)

✧ always packs extra milk bread so he could convince you to stay at his practice after school--

✧ FILTERSS

✧ I CANNOT STRESS THIS ENUF

✧ will either use the filters that make him kayooottt (cute)

✧ loves the ones named ‘hearts,’ ‘soft,’ ‘peach,’ ‘butterfly cheeks,’ vsco filters LOL, etc

✧ uses ‘big mouth’ when he feelin a bit sASSY; also loves to use this one when he rants, it channels his inner valley girl

✧ sometimes he’ll be snacking or drinking something while he does so (“hey guys today im gonna eat these milk buns from my favorite bakery and this bomb orange juice and complain about this little kid who talked smack to me earlier and almost made me cry--”)

✧ takes cute selfies with you, is an aesthetic selfie king, puts them on his story to show off he’s hangin with you

✧ but on your story you only post the ones he looks bad in LOL

✧ has separate stories for his every need, some r private (and lucky you, ur included in all of them)

✧ titles them ‘mean things iwa said to me today,’ ‘ranting hotbox + mukbangs,’ ‘a day in the life of oikawa,’ ‘volleyball 🏐,’ ‘unpopular opinions,’ etc.

✧ fitting room photoshoots lol

✧ “y/n, what do you think of this??” “and this?” “oOH WHAT ABOUT THIS??”

✧ ends up calling you through video chat so you can live critique his choices

✧ “oikawa, please no, i can’t be seen with you in public if you wear those--”

✧ also changes his bitmoji’s outfits from time to time, hopes you’ll notice, but you don’t LOL (oikawa: ;((((((( )

kenma

✧ uses sc usually just to reply to messages ppl send him

✧ indifferent about streaks, but keeps a few with ppl he’s closer to

✧ mindlessly plays the snapchat games with you, finds some of them kinda cute

✧ you both made his bitmoji for him, dressing his up in the orange cat suit

✧ you also helped make kuroo’s and put his in the black cat suit to match--

✧ snaps you every time he gets a new game, starts playing it, and once he finishes

✧ started to post some gameplays and reviews on his sc story (might as well add them to sc since he was already on other social platforms), and ended up amassing a large following

✧ follows the tech and gaming stories on sc

✧ as well as the ones with cute animals--

✧ open to selfies with you, usually wears a calm expression and holds up a peace sign

✧ even occasionally sticks his tongue out

✧ his story is occasionally heavily bombarded with candids of him w/ pretty sc filters, all taken by you

✧ but of all the filters, you love using the clout glasses on him

✧ especially when he’s just minding his own business

✧ “kenma, in his tru habitat” when hes cocooned in a blanket

✧ “kenma, on his way to steal yo manz” while on his way to the bathroom

✧ “kenma, next iron chef. watch out gordon” as he’s cooking instant ramen

✧ “kenma” n das it

✧ but he thinks it meme-y so he lets you do whatever you want, kinda digs it

✧ you end up dedicating your snap story to memes of kenma and the nekoma volleyball team. ppl are in it for the shits n giggles n hot bois

✧ you later discover someone else did the same thing with their volleyball team filled with hot bois from shiratorizawa, and you befriend tendou and share funni internet tings

akaashi

✧ 99% of his photos include either you or bokuto or both

✧ bokuto spams akaashi’s story and contact list with selfies and videos of himself using weird filters, often gets you to join him

✧ has several streaks, but will send something with more substance than a black screen or his bedroom window

✧ will usually involve smthng that just happened to him or smthing he saw, like:

✧ “a kind older lady offered me some apples in return for helping her”

-or:

✧ “how do i break the news to bokuto that the yaikniku place he’s been wanting to go to for the past week ,,, is closed today”

✧ o n let’s not leave out:

✧ “is it possible to conjure a ghost using a wooden spatula, ketchup, and a chalk drawn hexagram? bokuto’s been paranoid ever since he tried last night and i dont know what to tell him. seriously, help”

✧ looks through stories occasionally, comments whenever bokuto makes questionable decisions

✧ also comments on whatever you’ve posted. his words range from “you’re cute” to “why,” depending on the content

✧ ppl know when y’all are hanging out cuz he’ll post smthing to indicate he’s with you, usually it’s some candid and you’re not paying attention

✧ appreciation posts for you as well! esp if you got him something, like onigiri or his fav, Nanohana no Karashiae , for lunch! (akaashi: *snaps a pic of his food* “thank you y/n for feeding me”)

✧ prefers video calling over texting/snapping whenever possible tho

✧ occasionally reminisces thru his sc memories

✧ enjoys the flashback feature and will send them to you and bokuto (cuz they’re about y’all anyway lolol)

✧ also has secretly saved a bunch of selfies of himself, consists of him trying out a lot of the filters (he feelin himself)

✧ you, one day, looking thru his phone and discovering them: “akaashi, you’re so pretty wtf”

✧ akaashi: “...”

koganegawa

✧ sends you selfies of him before practice

✧ during breaks

✧ and after practice, usually makes a comment about how it went for him that day like:

✧ “i hit a decent toss today and futakuchi actually complimented me!”

✧ that, or:

✧ “i got yelled at 17 times today 😢😩”

✧ has quite a few streaks, his longest ones being with you and hinata

✧ def uses filters

✧ tries out every funny one he finds and sends you videos

✧ “look y/n im an aaaaAALlliiEEENnnNNN oo oo hoo hhhooOOh”

✧ “now im a chicky nuggy!!” (chicken nugget)

✧ also enjoys the doodle feature

✧ but he uses the filter with the clout glasses unironically--

✧ usually when smth good happens to him and he feels happy and/or cool about it

✧ “just beat the boss in this game on my 69th try B)”

✧ “kogane, that’s--”

✧ plays sc games with you and thinks bitmojis r cool

✧ kinda sad he cant find a hair option that matches him tho lolol rip

✧ you: “you hair’s just,,, unique,,,”

✧ subscribed to anything sports and fitness, as well as pop culture so he can stay in the loop

✧ also watches everyone else’s stories, pointing out whenever he sees smthing cool and/or interesting

✧ “woahh, karasuno’s at nationals right now! i wish we could’ve won, but next year for sure!!”

✧ you encourage him at all his games, hyping him up irl and online

✧ “koganegawa: best setter 😍!!”

✧ luckily you didnt record the parts he completely messed up LOL

semi

✧ before going out with you, snaps you a pic of his casual outfit like:

✧ semi: “does this look ok”

✧ you: “babe you look great, tendou was just messing with you”

✧ will make unwanted appearances on tendou’s snap and complains to you about them

✧ “i didnt consent to being part of his meme page” and

✧ “okay, but he didn’t only have to share all the moments i messed up--”

✧ also indifferent about streaks but will do them

✧ sometimes sends snaps/streaks indicating he’s practicing his music

✧ when you see these you usually ask him to send you vids or if you can come over n watch

✧ initially is a bit shy about it but he loves what he does and you and knows you’re genuinely interested and supportive so he agrees

✧ secretly rlly enjoys having you as his personal audience

✧ lowkey into asmr, like the soap cutting shit as well as chewing crunchy things

✧ also watches food porn and clips of mukbangs, then can’t resist going on youtube and watching the whole thing

✧ “y/n, can we try this, it looks so good--”

✧ will also often watch oikawa’s stories, especially his ‘ranting hotbox + mukbangs,’ and makes comments about him being an idiot

✧ “this kid he’s talking about is a savage”

✧ but admits they’re quite entertaining

✧ just looks serious in all the selfies you take with him

✧ you: “can you look like you’re enjoying yourself?”

✧ semi: “i look cooler like this tho”

✧ sc memories filled with shenanigans from you and the volleyball team, doodles, and mirror selfies with him experimenting diff looks (you: “tendou, you got him way too concerned about this”)

✧ also enjoys showing off he’s with you, taking a short video of you when you hang out

✧ you: “semi, i look bad right now”

✧ semi: “but you can never look bad”

✧ you: “🥺 bb”

✧ viewers: “aw”

✧ shiratorizawa: “can he be this nice with us LOL”

shirabu

✧ his main mode of communication with you is mostly through the regular messaging app, so he doesn’t use sc too much

✧ also doesn’t care for streaks and is bad at keeping them

✧ will answer to you or his senpais rather soon tho

✧ but lets all his other notifications pile up a bit before finally going thru them

✧ goes through the snaps he receives really fast, spending like 2 seconds each to look at them cuz aint nobody got time for dat

✧ doesn’t even rlly open goshiki’s LOL

✧ you have fun using filters on him and taking videos while he’s just doing his own thing peacefully like studying

✧ it takes him a second to notice and when he finally looks up, he just gives you an exasperated look

✧ cue you cracking up with laughter bc the filter finally shows up on his face

✧ his eyes and mouth are now on mike wazowski

✧ that, or his face becomes so disturbingly moRPhed like an alien

✧ caption: “ken-chan, my future medical man 😍”

✧ “y/n, please, this is like the 7th time in the last 20 minutes--”

✧ finally convinced him to take a study break and hang out with you

✧ which usually consists of snacking and light banter while you lay your head on his lap

✧ and scrolling through snapchat stories and showing him what everyone else is up to and cool things you’re subscribed to

✧ “loooook, dr. miami’s doing another butt job! is this the line of work you’re studying so hard for?”

✧ “no, it’s really not”

✧ is actually very soft with you and likes having the photos and vids for memories

atsumu

✧ sends you snaps where his brother looks bad, captioning it:

✧ “this is evidence that im the hotter twin”

✧ likewise, osamu sends you snaps where atsumu looks even worse

✧ like, the mans passed out, looking rekt and open mouthed, drool seeping into his pillow

✧ osamu: “u still have time to break up with him”

✧ also lucky for you, atsumu also loves to take unflattering photos of you and send them to you randomly at like 2 am

✧ you: “nani tf when did you even take this??”

✧ usually posts a snap while he’s out somewhere like at a match, the gym, outside on a run, a party, or just hanging out with you or his frens

✧ however, makes sure you look good if you show up on his story cuz he wants to show you off

✧ doesn’t really care for streaks, but has a lott

✧ but also has a tON of unopened snaps

✧ is the type to send just a black screen n call it a day, or maybe spice it up by sending a pic of the sexi gym floor (a comeback) w his shoe in the corner

✧ will, however, consistently respond to you and kinda looks forward to ur snaps (secretly hopes you show ur face)

✧ but when you dont:

*in class*

✧ atsumu: *a smirk on his face* “your content’s kinda dry today”

✧ you: *your sexi desk* “my nudez ain’t free, i demand compensation”

✧ atsumu: *grasped his chin in thought, but angled the cam up bc he needa hide his phone in class lolol* “what if i... take you out on a romantic excursion”

✧ you: * your face but with ‘sausage’ filter* “🥵🥵🥵🥵 yessir, what u want”

✧ rlly only wants to have pics of your face wat a closeted sOFTIE

✧ likes to have content on his flashbacks

✧ usually has other social media sources to keep up to date with things

✧ actually rlly digs using sc filters, mostly ones that’ll make him look like a queen

✧ captions a selfie of you two like: “me >>>>>>> y/n”

✧ but nearly everyone who comments on it is like: “i think you flipped the sign, bro 🤥”

✧ judges ppl who are into soap cutting asmr (you will never hear the end of it if you also like it)

a/n: sc kinda dying for me, my use went from suga to an atsumu to like nearly nonexistent LOL

also o gawd i already have ideas here n there for a pt 2 so stay tuned fjxnwfesd hope it takes me less long cuz this one took me fkin foreva LOL

idk y i made semi like mukbangs but i feel like he’d be rlly into them--

#haikyuu x reader #haikyuu imagines #haikyuu reader insert #sugawara x reader #kageyama x reader #oikawa x reader #kenma x reader #akaashi x reader #koganegawa x reader #semi x reader #shirabu x reader #atsumu x reader #haikyuu headcanons

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quirklessidiot · 4 years ago

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aoba johsai’s sport’s journalist (h/c’s)

just crack+ fluff + platonic-ish relationship (gn!y/n) (w: language!) a/n: this has been bugging me for awhile now since i havent seen headcanons of this yet (if their are do send them on my ask box) and since im on a slump, i decided to write this down. this is completely fun, easy-going, and self-indulgent, really perfect for someone stuck on a slump ksks. idk if i should make some for the other schools but oh welp enjoy! happy 900 btw werkwerk uwu so weird to reach this when im not even very active.

Now let’s be honest here, it’s no surprise that the volleyball team of aoba johsai has their own sports journalist. Like, c’mon, they’re one of the best in the prefecture.

But let’s start with the basics here, shall we? Let’s start with you, how this all goes through, and how you got into this heaping pile of mess.

Yep, you.

There you were in high hopes to get into journalism for college so what better way was it than to apply for the school paper? It would definitely look good and pretty in those college applications *chef’s kiss* you’re a second year btw idk if that matters but yeah..

Much to your surprise no one was applying for the news section which was kind of sad since you wanted a buddy there.

but-but it turns out though everyone was applying for the sports section completely understandable, next to feature, it was the most exciting thing to write because there was going to be a special section and writer for the volleyball team.

You knew that volleyball was kind of a big thing around your school?? you just didn’t expect it to amass like that much people.

The editor in chief is obviously surprised, you were the first person on that day to come in there and actually apply for something else.

and guess where that led you to?

Yep, the sport’s section, specifically the volleyball team’s personal sports journalist. Your brain goes brrt brrt because you were not a sports writer at all and you were, ironically, scared of ball games.

VOLLEYBALL WAS COMPLETELY NEW TERRITORY FOR YOU.

Your editor in chief laughs it off and says, “you’ll do fine… its like news bUT SPORTS! IT’LL DEFINITELY LOOK GOOD IN YOUR APPLICATIONS!”

You’re not sure if you should be terrified or terrified?

It doesn’t help that on the first day when you enter the gym you look terribly constipated and panicking a lot because of all the stray balls being spiked and tossed around.

It also didn’t help that you crash course the terminologies and the member’s name a night before and you were just running on iced coffee that day.

Yeah, way to make a first impression, huh?

When you approach the coach, you’re not exactly sure what to say and you were this close to chickening out until you saw one of the players come up to you and ask if you were alright and if you wanted to talk to oikawa.

you’re loading for a second there.

and the poor guy who asks you if you were alright, starts looking actually worried because you weren’t responding at all.

“OH, oH IS THAT THE CAPTAIN?”

the guy literally looks very confused?? because what kind of rock were you living under that you didn’t know Oikawa???

so you go ahead and introduce yourself and say that your name was Y/N and you were the new sports journalist for the team.

“....soooo you write?”

“...”

at this point on, you’re also confused too

and idk man, first impressions do indeed last because you ended up (unknowingly) sharing the same brain cell with Matsukawa Issei.

you both were just confused there, straight up looking like two kids who got left behind by their mom in the grocery check-out line.

anyways...

He tells you the team’s pretty chill and you should stop looking like they spiked a ball on your puppy or something.

Basically introduces you to the whole team after,

no questions asked, just go with the flow.

You basically just click and vibe???

Not only because you crash coursed and related to whatever they said,

you literally all shared the same brain cell together.

Kentaro was another story though, kid basically hated your guts at first, it felt like if you were to say one sentence to him that day, he’d literally spike a ball at your direction.

“we’re basically the same year tho :(” -Y/N

“lmao well do i’ve got news for you, y/n-chan.” - Oikawa and basically everyone on the team.

you gradually start to understand the coolness of the sport since you had to incorporate visiting them once or twice a week during practice.

but suddenly it becomes almost a daily routine after a month because they’re just really friendly people??

like wow, they’re all friendly giants.

You’re literally just there to write about them but they’re really patient and kind, they even invite you to practice games so that you could practice out your skills in writing since you mentioned that you’ve never written for sports yet.

they even give you some added key terms that aren’t found in books and online.

you’re def closest to iwaizumi and matsukawa.

iwaizumi because he makes really funny fish jokes about oikawa (yes you arent supposed to be laughing but man theyre funny af, oikawa would usually call you and iwa corny because the jokes aren’t even that funny) and yes its canon that whenever iwaizumi sees an oikawa fish in textbooks, he starts laughing and joking about it.

no explanation needed why you ended up being close to matsukawa.

its obvious after that first meeting ya both would be besties.

same brain cell bros go brrt brrt.

incredibly!! supportive!! I CANNOT STRESS THAT ENOUGH

like when you release a new write up about them, Oikawa would usually go, “It’s such an honor to be apart of your first steps, can you sign this?”

dramatic but hella supportive, we stan the gr8 king

“oh, wow, i thought you said you didn’t write before? how come you sound like a professional already?” - Hanamaki

another dramatic best boi.

akira + kindaichi getting shy because they’ve never experienced this yet. So whenever you try to interview them about stats or something for a special issue, they usually end up a stuttering mess

“w-well, L/N-san...”

kentaro slowly warming up to you but still looks like he wants to spike a volleyball at your face 90% of the time but unlike before you’re used to his whole thing already.

“Move, extra.”

“You were great, by the way. That was a powerful spike!”

you may or may not be included in random ramen nights with the team

yes, oikawa buys you your own bowl of ramen

itadakimasu.

he doesn’t mind tho, he really loves how you write them.

so its sort of a thank you for giving the team justice when you write about them.

team says you’re technically part of the team so they make you your own jersey. Now when you watch your games people ask if you’re like the manager or smthng.

“ no :’) “

When they lost against shiratorizawa and karasuno, you were bawling too like you were apart of the team.

this pretty much cheered everyone up despite the loss because your crying face was apparently very funny and memable.

oh right, your article was passed on to the town’s newspaper

it was literally like 7 am on a saturday and your notifs went zoop.

they added you to their group chat and spammed you with pictures of the articles that you wrote.

“...wOW I CAN’T BELIEVE IT?? YOU GOT FRONT PAGE FOR SPORTS???” -Oikawa

“we didn’t even win the tournament but we still get a feature?? thats so cool?? holy shit?? CONGRATS KSKSKS” -matsukawa

lmao idk matsukawa looks like a keyboard smasher tbh idk why

pretty much its normal for you to even start hanging out already outside of the court and after practice to get steam buns.

more chaotic mess and clumsy you running around.

your volleyball sports writing experience wouldn’t be complete until someone accidentally spikes a ball at the back of your head amaright?

ironically, it’s yahaba who does that to you. poor smoll bean.

“wow, you’re dumb.” -kentaro says to you

“ :’)” -you.

“y/N-SAN I SWEAR IT WAS AN ACCIDENT.” -yahaba

overall, you found yourself in a safe haven with the volleyball team and yes, you also cried when the third years graduated.

the third years have a picture with everyone on the team + you with a very red face from all the crying?? once again, you’ve proven yourself to be a meme.

continued to write for them up until graduation.

and its def obvious you kept in touch with all of them after, duh.

#haikyuu!!#haikyū!!#haikyuu imagines #haikyuu headcanons #haikyuu fluff #haikyuu aoba johsai #haikyuu scenarios #aoba johsai x reader #haikyu headcanons #haikyu scenarios

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really-freaking-clever · 4 years ago

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Aoba Johsai Food Headcanons:

3rd Years:

Oikawa:

• likes sweet things!

• can cook some things

• if he's in class and hungry he just chews gum

• goes to iwa's house for dinner

• fav food that iwa makes is his agedashi tofu

• not a very picky eater

Iwaizumi:

• cooks in his free time

• makes food and brings it over to Oiks' house sometimes

• he's a picky eater

• would marry the owner of the local bakery but has to settle for Oikawa instead 😔

• listens to music while he cooks!

• if a team member asks for a recipe he'll gladly give it to them

Hanamaki:

• really only eats sugary stuff

• makes candy for himself

• sells his homemade candy at school

• eats whatever mattsun eats at school

• always has gum or candy in his mouth

• doesn't cook for himself

Mattsukawa:

• very good cook

• prefers salty food as opposed to makki

• brings an extra portion of food for makki

• him and makki are the "snack lords" at school

• he brings in chips and sodas and sells them

• fav drink is,,, a mint chocolate chip milkshake

2nd Years:

Yahaba:

• more of a meal prepper

• counts his calories

• salads and rice for lunch

• no one has ever seen him drink soda

• has juice and milkshakes as a treat

• fav fruit is grapes

Kyoutani:

• he doesn't care what he eats

• never cooked in his life. maybe that's a good thing.

• runs on red bull and bang

• eats ramen straight outta the packet

• swallowed his gum multiple times on purpose

• challenged kamisaki to an eating competition and lost by 15 cupcakes

1st Years:

Kindaichi:

• he thinks he's slick for not buying from mattsun & makki but he's really just stupid

• sometimes trades lunches with ppl (it's not very successful)

• offered a bologna sandwich to kunimi to trade and got slapped across the face

• brings coffee to lunch

• one time he was in sadboyhours™ and salted a grilled cheese with his tears

• wayyy too picky

Kunimi:

• (i have a hc that he's rich) has his chefs make his lunch everyday

• gourmet bento boxes baybee

• felt bad for kindaichi once and gave him his lunch

• in middle school him and kags would play lunchbox roulette and compare their lunches each day

• touched a stove once and almost burned his fingerprints off

• has ramune with his lunch everyday

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ao3feed-iwachanoikawa · 6 years ago

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Late Night Fever Dream

read it on the AO3 at https://ift.tt/2KCHwRY

by redroseinsanity

A love story charted by the stars and ramen receipts.

Iwaizumi makes Oikawa fall in love and ramen in pretty much the same breath.

Words: 7052, Chapters: 1/1, Language: English

Fandoms: Haikyuu!!

Rating: General Audiences

Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply

Categories: M/M

Characters: Iwaizumi Hajime, Oikawa Tooru, Sugawara Koushi, Sawamura Daichi

Relationships: Iwaizumi Hajime/Oikawa Tooru, Sawamura Daichi/Sugawara Koushi

Additional Tags: Ramen chef!Iwa, Astrophysicist! Oikawa, ramen shop au, mainly fluff, slight angst, But a happy ending nonetheless, of course, BFF Oikawa and Suga, iwaoi - Freeform, side daisuga, i hope this makes you hungry for ramen, cause I am now

read it on the AO3 at https://ift.tt/2KCHwRY

#ao3feed #fanfic #Iwaizumi Hajime/Oikawa Tooru #Iwaizumi x Oikawa #iwaoi #iwa chan #haikyuu #hq

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baeshijima · 4 years ago

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your honour, i am once again in love with the man that is iwaizumi hajime

pLS DEXII THIS

THIS WAS AMAZING???? IT WAS SO ADORABLE AND THE INTERACTION BETWEEN THE TWO OF US IS JUST !!!!! it’s so beautifully written and the whole style is just *tearful chef’s kiss* mWAH

i want an iwa so i can get an oversized godzilla hoodie pls 🥺

“More than you want ramen?”

“That’s- that’s an unfair comparison!”

plS WHY IS THIS ME DSKJHKLHG but to be fair, iwa, comparing a car with ramen is a very close call and either is just as useful—

Maybe that’s why whenever he looked at you, he felt like he was at home.

thIS

THIS LINE

SOBS

THAT’S IT, THAT’S THE COMMENTARY HDKJGFHKLD

in conclusion, your honour, i am telling you once again i have fallen in love and i dont wanna get back up—

24/7 ramen.

description: you are iwaizumi’s home; even if he is forced to take you to a ramen place at 2 in the morning.

pairing: iwaizumi x gen!reader

genre/warning: banter, fluff, literally just filler dialogue with an overarching plot, light mentions of violence

word count: 1.8k

a/n: this was inspired by some headcanons im going to post. oh and this is for @hajiimes... hehe <3

“I got into a fight.”

Iwaizumi paused, his phone hovering near his ear. He resisted the urge to let out a sharp laugh—of all the things, why did you have to get into a fight?—and slung his arm over his face. “And you lost?”

Iwaizumi could almost hear you pouting. “To be fair, they were-”

“But you lost.”

A pause. “Yeah.”

Iwaizumi dragged his hand across his face with a heavy sigh. “Why are you fighting people at,” he paused to squint at the digital clock on the dresser, “Two in the morning?”

“Ramen.”

“What?”

“Hot and spicy shrimp,” you said solemnly. “There was only one pack-”

“You’re aware we have finals tomorrow, right?”

“Exactly the reason why I wanted ramen.”

Iwaizumi sighed again. “Are you hurt?”

“Well, someone elbowed me in the eye-”

“The eye?”

“Yes the eye. I’m pretty sure it’s swollen, but other than that I’m perfectly fine.”

“Why do you sound so happy?” Iwaizumi asked, getting up to scour his closet for a hoodie. “You lost a fight over a pack of ramen.”

“Well technically, no one won the fight. We all got kicked out of the store. Poor guy didn’t even keep his ramen.”

“Which store?”

“Walmart.”

“You couldn’t have gone to a convenience store or something?” Iwaizumi pulled on the hoodie Oikawa sent him from Argentina and grabbed an old Godzilla hoodie from his closet.

“Haji, this is Socal, not Japan,” you condescended. Iwaizumi scoffed at how haughty you sounded. “I’m sure Socal has convenience stores,” he muttered.

“Well, Walmart was the closest.”

“You could’ve woken me up,” Iwaizumi grumbled, moving on to grab the keys off the drawer, “I would’ve taken you to a convenience store.”

“But you were sleeping.”

“So? You know how dangerous that was? I’d feel a little better if I was there.”

“Yeah, but I wanted ramen,” you sighed. “Anyway, can you pick me up, Haji? It’s getting cold.”

Iwaizumi shut the apartment door with a quiet click. “I’m leaving the apartment now.”

“That was fast.”

“Yeah, I had a feeling that you’d want me to pick you up.”

“Okay. Oh, and remember to drive on the right side of the road.”

“I know.”

“Are you sure? You almost drove into a tree last time.”

“Because I was tired.” Iwaizumi opened the door to the car, dropping the hoodie into the passenger’s seat. “Tired people don’t think straight.”

“Aren’t you tired right now?”

“No, I’ve been awake since you told me you got into a fight. You need to tell me what the hell actually happened there.”

“I told you, it was ramen,” you huffed. “There was one pack of spicy shrimp and three desperate college students in need of ramen.”

“So you fought for it.”

“I lunged for it, some other dude shoved me, I crashed into the third person, and then he was pushing them and I was on the floor and then someone’s elbow was in my eye and then the employee grabbed us and tossed us out.”

Iwaizumi took a moment to process your words. “You sound proud of yourself.”

“I’m not. I didn’t get the ramen.”

“No one got the ramen,” Iwaizumi deadpanned. “Isn’t that what you said?”

“I mean yeah, but now I can tell people I’ve been in a fight.”

“Why would you want to tell someone you’ve been in a fight?”

“I dunno,” you sighed. “I’m tired and hungry. Tired and hungry people say weird things.”

“Damn right.”

“That was an insult.”

“It was.”

“Ouch.”

Iwaizumi didn’t respond, lightly drumming his fingers against the steering wheel as he waited for the red light to turn green.

“My eye hurts,” you said suddenly, your voice crackling from the phone’s speaker.

Iwaizumi furrowed his eyebrows. “Does it hurt a lot?”

“No,” you decide. “Ramen would make it better.”

“So now I’m buying you ramen?”

“Yeah.”

“At 2 AM?”

“It’s 2:28 now.”

Iwaizumi scoffed.

“I found this ramen place that’s open,” you said. “24/7 Ramen. It’s 25 minutes from here.”

“Why is there a ramen place open for 24 hours?” he muttered, half to himself.

“It’s probably run by college students. That’s why the name is catchy too.”

“Catchy?”

“It sounds like a song. You know, 24 Karat Magic by Bruno Mars.”

“Never heard of it.”

“What?” Iwaizumi found himself flinching, despite the fact it was simply your voice coming from his phone’s speaker. “How have you been living in America for two years without ever hearing 24 Karat Magic? That song is a classic.”

“I think you’re forgetting you’re speaking to a guy born and raised in Japan.”

“Haji, you’ve been here for two years. That’s 24 months. 48 weeks. And a certain amount of days I’m too tired to calculate.”

Iwaizumi thought for a moment. “730.”

“730-” you paused. “How the hell did you calculate that so fast?”

“Dealing with stupid people makes you smarter, I guess.”

“No, ramen makes you smarter.” You sighed. “I really want ramen.”

“I heard.” Iwaizumi turned the steering wheel, bringing the car into the Walmart parking lot. “And I’m here now, so you can stop whining.”

“Oh, I see you. Do you see me?”

There was a figure sitting on the front curb, waving erratically in Iwaizumi’s direction. “I see an idiot waving at me like their life depends on it, so yes, I see you.”

“I think being around stupid people makes you grumpy,” you grumbled.

“No, having to pick my significant other up from Walmart at 2 in the morning makes me grumpy.”

You responded by scoffing and hanging up the phone. Seconds later, you were sliding into the passenger seat of the car. “Aw, did you bring a hoodie for me?” you asked, glancing down at the Godzilla hoodie that you almost sat down on.

Iwaizumi glanced over to you, raising an eyebrow. “Hello to you too.”

You rolled your eyes and leaned forward to press a quick kiss to Iwaizumi’s cheek. “Hi, I love you, thank you for picking me up. Happy now?”

“I’m ecstatic. Yes, that hoodie is for you.”

You smiled, pulling the hoodie on over your shirt and relaxing into the seat. Iwaizumi carefully looked over your face. The only noticeable injury was the ring of darkness around your eye—did they really elbow you that hard?—and a slight cut on your upper lip, but those would heal soon. He let out a quiet sigh of relief.

“What, is there something on my face?” you asked, reaching up to brush your fingers over your cheek.

“You have a black eye.”

Your eyebrows furrowed. “Damn. Is it bad?”

“No, not really.” He checked the dashboard for the time and slightly frowned. “Where’s the ramen place?”

24/7 Ramen was a small convenience store in between an optometrist and a cigarette shop. On the outside, it wasn’t much. The name of the store was illuminated in large flickering neon letters. The exterior brick walls of the store were dusty and crumbling with age and wore. The windows were covered with assorted posters and papers, some for missing children, upcoming movies, and advertisements for Japanese snacks.

“Oh, so this is like a Japanese convenience store then?” you asked, looking at one of the Japanese ads. “I guess you were right.”

“Told you.”

“Just come on and buy me my ramen.”

The door opened with a familiar chime that reminded Iwaizumi of warm yakisoba buns, tangled with the sight of preppy school uniforms, and of course, Oikawa Tooru. The layout of the store was straight out of Japan, overwhelming him with countless reels of tender highschool memories. If he closed his eyes he could see himself standing right there, bag under his arm, Oikawa at his shoulder.

“Feeling a little nostalgic, huh?”

His head whipped toward you standing behind him with an amused smile on your face. “This place does have a Japanese feel to it.” You raised your eyebrow in that insufferably adorable way of yours, and Iwaizumi found it hard to breathe.

He stuffed his hands in his pockets as a flush began to form on his cheeks. “Be quiet.”

You hummed but made no other comment, instead choosing to shoot him another knowing look that made his blood roar in his ears. You started moving through the store, picking cups of ramen off the shelves. He hovered behind you, still embarrassed about his nostalgic moment—was he that homesick?—occasionally picking up cups of ramen and examining them before placing them back onto the shelf.

After what seemed like ages, you presented your armful of ramen cups with a proud smile. “I’m done.”

Iwaizumi raised an eyebrow. “I’m not buying you 15 cups of ramen.”

“But you promised-“

“Each one is like, 65 cents? I’ll buy you 5, max.”

“Why not more?”

“I’m just as broke as you are.”

You sighed in defeat. “Being broke in college sucks.”

“I told you we should’ve held off on getting a car.”

“But I wanted a car!”

“More than you want ramen?”

“That’s- that’s an unfair comparison!”

Iwaizumi continued to go back and forth with you, even as you paid for the ramen at the cash register. You were in the middle of a frantic explanation of why investing in a car was important in California when you finally made it outside.

The air was still and cool, save for the slight breeze that occasionally tangled in Iwaizumi’s spiky locks. The only sounds were the distant cars speeding across the road and the faint sound of crickets chirping, for you had both fallen silent after leaving the convenience store. Iwaizumi turned to look at you: one eye swollen, upper lip bleeding, a plastic bag full of convenience store ramen clutched tightly in your hand. He could see the fire in your eyes, that odd determination to make your own dreams a reality, no matter how fickle or ridiculous they were. It was similar to the drive he saw in Oikawa’s eyes, he realized. The reckless, worthless one that seemed to be a double-edged sword.

Maybe that’s why whenever he looked at you, he felt like he was at home.

“I love you, you know that?”

You cocked your head to the side and smiled slightly. “Where did that come from?”

He shrugged and stuffed his hands into his pockets again, turning away from your curious gaze. The corners of your mouth pulled up into a faint smile. Without warning, you turned Iwaizumi toward you with your finger and pressed a chaste kiss to his lips. And then you were bounding off toward the car, the plastic bag jostling in your hand.

“Hey,” Iwaizumi called, starting after you. “Come back here so I can kiss you properly.”

“I want my ramen!” came your response from the car. “No kisses until I get my ramen!”

Iwaizumi chuckled softly. You were annoying and feisty, but you still managed to make him feel right at home.

taglist in reblog; please comment/reblog with comments in the tags or in the post if you enjoyed!! i love hearing your feedback :)

#royal recs #nobles #PLS DEXII THIS IS AMAZING DHFKSJHGLKHSDKHG;D #cries in 9pm ;-;#pspsps someone gib godzilla hoodie pls #or at least watch godzilla w me so i can cry abt it to someone bc yes i love godzilla too #but iwa u not hearing 24 karat magic broke me a little so uh ;-;#i hope it's at least one of those songs uve heard of but dont know the name of 🤡#if not then im (not) sorry but all ur godzilla hoodies are coming with me and never returning even after u listen bc oversized hoodies are #warm and it being godzilla just takes the cake for me so a h A

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isolavirtuosa · 5 years ago

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Starting Over (For Real?) 17-18

[fanfiction] NaruSasu

Read the previous parts here.

- 17 -

“You seem really cheerful,” Sai commented as we moved through the desert.

“Do I?” Naruto asked cheerfully.

“Well, of course, that’s the reason I said it,” Sai said. “You seem like a man who is getting laid.”

I dug my fingers into Naruto’s shoulder.

He grimaced. “Uh, well, uh. What?”

Sai just smiled.

“Be less happy,” I growled into Naruto’s ear.

He turned back to give me an incredulous look. “You are like the most horrible person I have ever met.”

My smile got nasty. “You want to see horrible?”

“No!” he said, facing forward again, not that it mattered. There was nothing in front of us for miles, just endless expanses of sand.

We’d left Iwa behind without much to show for it. Now we were almost to Suna, running low on food and motivation, and for some inexplicable reason still travelling with my would-be-assassin.

Apparently no ninjas seemed to see the value in trying to take over the desert in the middle of a famine, leaving the Land of Wind fairly intact compared to Iwa.

When we reached Suna, we were greeted by two of the three Sand siblings at the gate.

“Wouldn’t believe it if I wasn’t seeing it with my own eyes,” Temari commented, looking the three of us up and down.

“What’s not to believe?” Naruto asked cheerfully.

“Well, we can start with the Uchiha attached to your back like a koala,” Kankurou said, pointing at me.

I raised my chin a little higher and exuded haughtiness.

“I’m his horse,” Naruto explained.

Temari half-smiled. “I can see that. We weren’t really expecting a diplomatic party so soon, especially not one consisting of a missing nin, a spy, and… you.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Naruto asked, scratching his nose.

Temari rolled her eyes. “Gaara will be thrilled to see you.” She motioned for the guards to open the gates.

“He’s doing okay?” Naruto asked.

“He’s doing great,” Kankurou lied.

We started to enter the village, and I felt my body twitching to call up Susanoo. I hated presenting myself as so vulnerable and helpless. I wasn’t either of those things.

“Neigh,” Naruto said.

I pinched his cheek and he laughed. I thumbed over the red skin before letting my hand drop to his shoulder, holding on.

“You can park in the kage residence for the night,” Kankurou said, leading us there.

Suna seemed to be thriving. There was some damage from the God Tree, but teams of ninjas were working on repairing them. The shops on the main street were all open, and though I had very little interest in food beyond its necessity to keep my body functioning, the aromas wafting out of the stalls were surprisingly tantalizing.

“Sasuke, ohmigod, buy me ramen,” Naruto panted, standing in front of the stand and salivating.

“Later,” I said.

He looked at me over his shoulder, and it was so pathetic that we somehow found ourselves sitting down and eating ramen.

“Why do you have so much food?” I asked Temari as we waited for our order.

“This is the desert,” she said, like it was obvious.

I stared at her.

She stared back.

“Shouldn’t that mean you have less food than the rest of us?” Naruto asked helpfully.

“No, it means that we’re smarter and better at farming than the rest of you,” she replied, accepting her bowl from the chef.

“But who was doing the farming for the last two years?” Naruto asked, which was probably his last participation in the conversation as he broke apart his chopsticks and immediately started slurping up his noodles.

“Our smarter and better-trained villagers who weren’t taken into the tree,” she said.

“I’m sure a lot of other villages would be very interested in your smarter and better farming techniques,” Sai observed before loading his mouth with ramen.

Temari sniffed. “I’m sure they’d be more interested in stealing our surplus, which is why we have Suna on lockdown.”

“You let us in,” I commented.

“You’re with Naruto,” she said, like that was the only explanation that was needed.

Being with Naruto wasn’t enough to get an audience with the kazekage, though.

“I think the kazekage hasn’t recovered from being in the tree, yet,” Sai whispered to me as we were settling into our room.

“What do you mean?” I asked in a normal tone of voice because we were alone.

“I mean,” he said, still whispering, “that he was taken to Konoha to recover, kept under lock and key, and moved to Suna a week later in the dead of night.”

“Why wouldn’t they keep a kage separated from the rest of the rabble?” I asked with a shrug.

Sai smiled at me.

“Don’t do that,” I said.

He stopped.

“Just say it clearly.”

“The ANBU think that the kazekage started to turn into a white zetsu.”

“...what?”

Sai shrugged. “It’s only a rumor.”

“Why would the kazekage be the only ninja to be turned into a white zetsu?”

“Who says he’s the only one?”

“I don’t know, maybe you could just straightforwardly share all of your information.”

“I could.”

I looked at him.

“Oh, by the way,” he said suddenly. “All of the high-ranking officials in Iwa have seen your missing arm, and Temari and Kankurou have seen it, so people will probably start putting two and two together.”

“Now Hyuuga and his merry band of followers are going to want me even more dead?”

“Yep.”

“Great.”

“Are you being sarcastic?” Sai asked.

“Yes.”

“Ah. So it is not great.”

“Honestly, I don’t give a fuck. It’s nothing new.”

“It’s a little new, and I think you give a few fucks.”

I looked at him.

He looked back at me.

I ‘accidentally’ ran over his foot as I rolled past him.

“That’s fine,” he said. “I understand.”

My head whipped around to face him. “What do you understand?”

“You,” he said.

I was back to seeing why Sai was so irritating. “What are you still doing here, anyway? If you’re not going to kill me, then go crawling back to Konoha.”

Sai faltered at that. “Yes, that’s probably the best course of action.”

We stared at each other before I pushed my chair to the windowsill and used it to help me stand, feeling my legs wobble underneath me. I struggled through a few steps. “This is probably your only chance to kill me.”

“I wouldn’t do that to Naruto,” he said with an easy shrug.

“Even to save him from me?”

“He’s so in love he can’t see straight. If you were dead, he would be even more consumed by you.”

I almost fell on my face, forcing as much chakra into my legs as I could spare to keep me upright.

Sai noticed. “You love him, too, you know.”

I rolled my eyes.

“And that’s why the world is in the mess that it’s in.”

“...how so?”

“You know exactly how so. If Naruto had been able to kill you, we wouldn’t have lost the last year and a half to an illusion.”

“I think that’s more on Naruto than it is on me.”

“And if you had been able to kill him, I don’t think we would have lost that time, either.”

“I would have killed the kages.”

Sai shrugged.

“I’m starting to suspect that you’re not the good little Konoha ninja that you purport yourself to be,” I said, lowering myself back into my chair. My attempts at standing were making me look stupider than the chair did.

“I don’t know what I am,” he said, and it was completely straightforward and honest.

The room fell quiet and we both regarded one another seriously.

Then Naruto came bursting into the room. “You know, they’ve got like every kind of ramen, they’ve got miso and shouyu and shio and tonko-” he paused, looking between us. “Were you two… talking?”

“No,” we both said.

“Oh, uh, well, anyway, let’s stay here forever,” he said, flopping down on one of the futons that Sai had just carefully laid out.

“I tried to kill the kazekage,” I pointed out.

“More than once,” Sai added.

“More than once.”

“Gaara doesn’t care about that,” Naruto said, waving it off. Then his face went serious.

“How is the kazekage?” Sai asked.

Naruto was silent.

We both looked at him.

“I can’t talk about it,” he finally said, getting up.

Sai and I exchanged a look.

Naruto caught us and frowned.

When we were all lying in our futons, ready to sleep, he finally brought it up again. “Gaara’s still… recovering from everything.”

“I think there will be an attempted coup soon,” Sai commented.

“What?” Naruto said.

“It’s the same in Konoha and Iwa,” I agreed. “The entire ninja power structure is under attack. Suna will probably get a brief respite internally because the people are fed, but they’ll face external threats coming for their surplus.”

“That’s… dumb,” Naruto said.

“Insightful,” I murmured.

He growled and flopped his arm at me, smacking me in the chest.

I guffawed.

“Jerk,” he muttered, leaving his arm there for some reason. “Man, what are we gonna do?”

“Move on?” I suggested.

He smacked me again.

“Sasuke has a point,” Sai put in.

“What happened to the ninja alliance?” Naruto growled. “We all need to be helping each other out.”

“Oh, yeah, I should be helping out all these people who want me dead,” I said.

“The only one who wants you dead is Hyuuga,” Naruto protested.

“Ha.”

“Whaddya mean, ‘ha’?!”

“I think it was an ironic laugh,” Sai said. “To show his contempt for what you said.”

Naruto’s fingers tightened on my shirt.

I sighed, resting my hand over his briefly before removing it from my proximity. “We need to look out for ourselves, Naruto.”

“Do you even know me at all?” he muttered.

“Yes, which is why I’m telling you this.”

He wasn’t convinced, but we headed out east the next day.

- 18 -

When Naruto came back from his watch, I could feel him looming outside of my tent.

“Idiot,” I grumbled, which he took as permission to come in. “It’s Sai’s watch, isn’t it?”

He nodded, his blue eyes all wide and puppy-like.

I stared at him.

“I just…”

I stared harder.

“I wanna talk,” he said, and it wasn’t believable at all, but I beckoned him over.

“What do you want to talk about?” was about all I could say before his lips were pressed very insistently to mine.

“Hi,” he said, sliding into my sleeping bag and zipping it back up.

“Hi,” I replied, unzipping the bag. “It’s hot,” I added, nudging him away.

Naruto whined, keeping one leg intertwined with mine while the other flopped out of the sleeping bag. “I missed you.”

“We’re together almost every minute of every day.”

“Yeah, but we’re not like… together.”

I sighed, trying not to drown in his eyes. “If you want to make out, then just say so.”

“I want to make out,” he said sincerely. “But I was serious before, I want to talk to you.”

“About?”

He kissed me and it was an automatic reaction to kiss him back. He pulled back and I found myself pulling him back in. This went on for some time before he pulled enough away to rest his chin on my chest. “Um, so,” he started, “I’m gonna stop in Konoha before we go to Water.”

“No you’re not,” I said, frowning.

“I want to see Baa-chan,” he said, letting his finger run along my cheek. “I need to… have some closure.”

“Closure to what?” I asked. He wasn’t going to say what I thought he was going to say.

He knew I knew. “Sasuke. It’ll be the last time.”

“Don’t start with that.”

“I’m leaving the village. With you. Permanently.”

“That’s stupid.”

“Probably, but it’s what’s happening,” he said, his voice taking on a more authoritative tone that simultaneously annoyed and turned me on.

“Okay, ruin your life,” I said, trying to sound as disinterested as possible.

“Good, I will,” he agreed.

Our lips gravitated together. A few times.

“Are you leaving Sai there?” I asked, mouth still close enough to touch.

Naruto eliminated the distance for a moment. “Mm, no, he’s gonna stay with you.”

“Why would he do that? If he doesn’t assassinate me, then the ANBU will know he’s a traitor…” Then I knew. “He’s not going back to Konoha, either, is he?”

“I can’t ask him to play the spy anymore,” Naruto said seriously. “That’s not who he is now, ya know?”

“You don’t get to decide that.”

“No, I don’t, but I can tell he doesn’t want to go back to Konoha, so I’m going to talk to him after I finish arguing with you about going back by myself.”

“Oh, were we arguing?”

“Well, you’re about to go off on how I can’t travel by myself because I can’t do jutsu, blah blah blah.”

“If you already know why you can’t, then why are you bothering to bring it up?”

“Because I’m going to Konoha alone.”

“No, you’re not.”

“Sasuke.”

“Moron.”

“Rude,” he said, pinching my cheek.

“What if you’re attacked?” I growled, swatting him away.

“Who’s going to attack me in Konoha?”

“Rogue ninjas. Bandits. People who blame you for the Infinite Tsukuyomi. Ninjas who want to make a name for themselves.”

“Yeah, yeah, fine, whatever. I’m not completely defenseless.”

“You are absolutely, positively, completely defenseless.”

“I can do Sage Mode. I can… run away…”

“Idiot.”

He leaned up and kissed my forehead. “Don’t make that face. It’s adorable how much you worry about me, but it’s really not necessary.”

My eyes narrowed.

“Sasuke. Love. Come on.”

“That’s a new one,” I complained.

“Huh?” Naruto said, then smiled slowly. “Yeah, I’m testing it out. It’s how I feel about you, so it’s the perfect nickname.”

“Dumbass.”

“No,” he said firmly. “You don’t get to call me that anymore.”

“Then what should I call you?” I asked, genuinely perplexed.

“Just call me by my name, jeez,” he complained.

I looked him straight in his eyes. “Naruto.”

His smile was easy. “See? Was that so hard?”

“It’s a stupid name.”

“Ughhhh,” he groaned. “Enough, already. We all get it.”

I didn’t dare say ‘get what?’ because I knew he’d have an answer that would see right through me. So I tried not to hide behind the insults for a moment, settling my hand on the back of his neck and pulling him closer again. “Naruto,” I repeated.

“Sasuke,” he agreed as we gravitated together again.

It was definitely too hot in this damn sleeping bag.

Naruto laughed when I threw it off of us.

“We’re supposed to be sleeping, you know,” I informed him as his lips chased after mine.

“I know, love,” he hummed apologetically against my mouth. “I just wanted to… talk.”

“Talk.”

“Mm,” he hummed, shifting to kiss along my jaw. “You want me to let you sleep?”

“Well, you seem kind of up,” I said, dragging my hand up his thigh and brushing lightly over the bulge there.

Naruto gasped and turned red.

I liked that. “Sit up.”

He obediently scampered into a sitting position.

I liked that more. “Good boy,” I said, pushing myself up to meet him.

If he had a tail, it would have been wagging. He buried his face in my neck, nuzzling and rubbing.

It was adorable, and I momentarily lost focus. I took a breath and nudged him back into an upright position. I held him there with a hand in his hair, looking into his eyes. “I’m going to touch you,” I informed him.

“I am going to be touched,” he agreed.

I looked at him. He definitely did not get it. “I’m going to touch you,” I repeated, letting go of his hair and letting my hand drop to his lap.

Naruto’s eyes suddenly went full-bedroom.

I felt the heat creep up my neck as he covered my hand with his, rubbing it up and down. My lips parted involuntarily.

He leaned in, breathing into me more than kissing, his chest rising and falling rapidly.

I pulled out his waistband and slid my hand inside, gripping loosely.

His head dropped back and I almost thought he was going to fall over. His arm scrambled around my waist, holding me for dear life. “Sasuke,” he groaned.

I answered him by focusing on the task at hand, tightening my grip and flicking my wrist.

Naruto clearly had no shame, moaning and rocking his hips.

I tried not to get distracted. He was very responsive, and it was easy to figure out what he liked, so I focused on his reactions.

“Sas’... Sas’... Sasuke, I’m gonna…” he whimpered, seeming helpless.

“It’s okay, Naruto,” I soothed him. “I want you to.”

“Sasuke… Sasuke… I love you, Sasuke.”

I rolled my eyes. Of course Uzumaki Naruto had to try and make a handjob romantic. “Just shut up and come already.”

His dick twitched in my hand, because of course insults turned him on no matter how much he tried to tell me they didn’t.

“Naruto,” I said, soothing him with kisses until he’d made a mess of my hand.

His body leaned heavily against mine as he finally fell quiet and just tried to catch his breath.

I kissed the top of his head. “This is disgusting,” I informed him.

“Huh…?” he said, sluggish and dream-like.

I pulled my hand out of his pants and waved it in his face.

His smile got very goofy.

“That took forever,” I complained. “Get me a towel or something,” I added, shoving at his shoulder to get him to sit up.

“Can’t I bask for a minute?”

“No.”

He kissed my collarbone, humming into my skin.

I felt warm and contented, too. But the dry semen on my hand needed to be removed. “Move,” I ordered, and he did.

He came back a moment later with some water and his dick still hanging out of his pants.

I shook my head.

He looked down, confused, then let out an embarrassed laugh and put himself away.

“You need to change,” I informed him.

“Later,” he said, taking my hand like it was the most precious thing in the world and cleaning his nasty jizz off of it. He proceeded to kiss my palm, staring into my eyes adoringly.

“Go to hell,” I mumbled, shoving him away and getting back into my sleeping bag.

“If you keep pushing me away, I might disappear,” he said, laughing like it was a joke.

It wasn’t a joke, and I let him put his sleeping bag next to mine while we slept.

#narusasu #isola starting over

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