#rambling fyo

[fy0lin]

hey so im sobbing??

[kyouka-supremacy]

(˶ᵔ ᵕ ᵔ˶)

[aureatchi]

IF FYORIE LORE WAS AA MOVIE.. WHAT AM I PACING MYSELF TOOO!! 🙏🙏

this is my fav ask ever, btw. think enemies to lovers w/ a heavy past (except it’s blatantly obvious they never hated each other; they are madly infatuated w/ one another & js deny it to have everyone losing their minds :’) over a slowburn), the most breathtaking sceneries (from the dead of winter in moscow to the cherubic summer in italy), looots of lines tht could b quoted like poetry (LMAO), more than a few rly romantic scenes, a promise tht would lead to almost seeming like it got broken but in the end was kept, and a supa sentimental, happy ending. in general it’s rly DRAMATIC lol, but in the best & most emotional way <3

OR a quote to sum the theme up: “a cathedral, him pressing against me, his lips at my neck, and yes, i do believe his mouth is heaven, his kisses falling over me like stars.” (richard siken; crush)

[sskk-manifesto]

٩(๑･ิᴗ･ิ)۶

[irritablepoe]

okay but what if i told you he's just like me fr

[imsosocold]

NIKOLAI I’M WAITING

[daz4i]

i agree that ppl woobify poe too much. but also. making him a crazy murder guy needs to have a certain flavor to it or it misses the point as well. you gotta make him autistic abt it or it won't work.

[saintsgrrl]

fyo !!

hope you meant fyodor from bsd wlskwoks

tbh im not really active in the bsd fandom so my view on the characters are much different from before. but i think for fyo it didn't really change wjskwj i don't care as much as i did before but i still think that he is a really cool character and well written :))

[aroacesigma]

thoughts on fyodors trick in chapter 108 quick rant

i really do think it was a trick. i know a lot of ppl think it wasnt but honestly i think it is for a couple of reasons

first off, fyodor is a manipulative little shit . thats their thing . and theyve done it to sigma over and over again because they KNOW hes naive , they KNOW he doesnt have the experience necessary to tell that hes being manipulated. to be honest , its quite likely that fyodor thinks that dazai really is manipulating sigma, and that they could easily pull off the same thing because sigmas too damn trusting towards anyone who offers him even the slightest way out of whatever current mess he's in .

secondly, the whole 'evil alter' thing and all similar approximations is extremely overdone, and to be honest i dont think bsd is going to go that route . at least, i hope not, cause we dont need more of that crap. but i reckon asagiri is more creative than that, and idk there might be things to criticise but i think his portrayal of mental health hasnt been half bad so hopefully he has the sense not to Do That.

thirdly, back in dead apple, its pretty obvious that when fyodors ability is split from them, they work together . which obviously we need to know a lot more about their ability to find out for sure, but from all evidence we've seen, their ability is not working against them .

[probablysimpledreams]

Scary? My God You're Divine

(Fyodor x reader: NSFW)

a/n: omg Fyodor has been taking up too much space in my brain lately so I finally had to write for him <3 he's so pretty but in like a way pls hurt me way LOL

cw: toxic relationship dynamic (it's Fyo idk what yall expected lol), afab reader but otherwise gender neutral, lingerie, uhhh smut, oh mix of degrading and praise from Fyo, refers to reader as "milaya" for petname (I've seen multiple translations as darling, cute/cutie, & sweetheart)

wc: 1k

You hum happily as you spin around the dressing room, loving the way the expensive clothing fit your frame. It had been ages since your last shopping trip, and honestly you couldn't remember the last time you left your house. Ever since you and Fyodor had become serious, you have been living in the private manor he had built to suit your needs. Sometimes he would visit for a while, but often times he had other business to attend to. Despite not always being around, Fyodor always ensured your needs, wants, and safety were granted. The manor was filled with everything you asked for from private chefs who cooked whatever you wished, as many pets as you wanted to keep you company, and everything else you asked for. Not many people can understand your lifestyle, viewing your off grid manor as a cage, but this didn't matter to you. You were happy and in love and that's all that mattered to you.

A soft smile on your face as you imagine the sweet words your boyfriend will utter to you later tonight when you both are home and you get to show him everything from your shopping trip. Fyodor had been away on an extra long "work trip" these past few months, and you have been anxiously been awaiting his return. The excitement you felt this morning waking up to a letter detailing his return later tonight alongside a large sum of cash to spend before his return home continued to run through your veins as you tried on more clothes. You grab all the pieces that frame your figure perfectly, happily walking to the cashier before handing the bags over to the body guards accompanying you.

After hours of walking around the upscale mall, you were ready to head back home. You begin calling for one of the body guards to pull the car around until a certain store's display catches your eye. A wide smirk paints your face as your eyes scan over the angelic lingerie set the mannequin was dressed in, calling for the bodyguards to wait a little longer before leaving.

///////////////////////

"You look beautiful milaya," your boyfriend offers a small smile with his praise as you twirl around the bedroom in your new outfits. Though he did not like when you left the security of his control by going out in public, his love for your little "fashion shows" after a day out shopping was much stronger. These moments belonged to only him, you belonged to only him. He hummed thinking about that fact as you raced off to grab your next outfit, your eyes sparkling as you ramble on about a movie you had recently watched. His eyes watched your every movement, eyebrow raised as you grab a bag and head off into the bathroom. "Where are you going off to?"

"This outfit is a surprise baby! You'll see in a moment," you call out from behind the closed door. He chuckled at your actions, attention returning to his laptop as he waits for your return.

His eyes widen as you reenter the bedroom, posing in your white lacey lingerie set. You climb onto the bed, closing his laptop and placing it on the nightstand before sitting on his lap.

"Surprise!" you chuckle, already feeling aroused watching his purple eyes scan your body. His hands grip your waist, fingers toying with the lacey strings of the lingerie set.

"My my, I don't recall instructing you to buy something like this in my note, milaya," he hums, hands trailing up and down your sides.

"That's the point of a surprise," you smile innocently. You wrap your arms around his neck, pulling your face closer to his to plant a soft kiss on his lips.

"Whatever am I going to do with you," he sighs, hands returning to their tight grip on your waist. He pulls you in for a deeper, more passionate kiss. You whine against his lips, trying desperately to break free of his grasp and grind against him. "Patience darling."

"Fyo pleaseeee," you whine. "I've been patient for months!! I've missed you!! I need you!!" You exactly what he wanted to hear, how to get exactly what you wanted. You prided yourself on being Fyodor's one weakness in this world.

"Mmm," he happily hums, mentally noting how you said all the right answers. He loved playing these games with you, and he especially loved how you always were able to keep up with him. You were his precious darling, his angel. "I'm not fully convinced," he teased, evil smirk growing across his face. Anyone else would be attempting to run away from him after seeing this expression, however you only became more turned on. He took quick note of this too. "Look at you ______," one of his hands left your waist and traveled down to your clothed core. You gasp as he pushes the lace away from your skin, fingers running up and down your wet folds. "Making a mess of my lovely surprise. That needy? How pathetic." You cry out as his fingers begin rubbing circles against your clit.

"F-Fyodor!" you throw your head back, crying out his name. Your legs begin to shake as his movements grow faster, pushing you to your climax. "Fyo-Fyo I-I'm gonna," you cry and squirm as he kisses up and down your neck.

"Cum for me _______," he hums as you cry out his name again and again as you ride out your high. Your body shakes as you try to catch your breathe. It had been months since you've felt this good, your own fingers and toys not comparing in the slightest to what Fyodor can do. However, you don't get much time to recover before you're thrown onto your back, Fyodor now hovering you. "We're only beginning," that evil grin returning to his face before he kisses your cheek softly. "This is what you wanted, right milaya? You've been so good, let me indulge you tonight."

[zweetpea]

Please don’t leave me alone!

(happy birthday my sweet angel)

Summary:

Fyodor my Baby 😭. This whole thing is very Tangled inspired. Tangled is art though so it’s all good 😌. Content warning: Self deprecating thoughts, Fyodor nearly dies. Some spicy implications at the end.

“Fyodor! I made you some tea!” You cheered from the doorway of his office. “Fyo… Fyodor… Fedya~” you whispered that last one seductively into his ear. 

“Is my wife being needy?” He turns around and pulls you into his lap. 

“No! I’m just going to miss you. Do you have to go on this stupid work trip and leave me alone?” You pouted.

“It’s for the greater good. You want the world to be free of sin don’t you?”

(A/N: greater good? I am your wife! I’m the greatest good you are ever gonna get!)

“I do. I know that by doing this peace will be brought to the world and we’ll be one step closer to bringing about a paradise for all mankind to cherish. Just please be careful love.”

“I will be, little mouse.” He smiled as he kissed your cheek.

The day he left he gave you a long passionate kiss on the lips.

“I love you Fyodor. I always will.”

“I love you too, little mouse. I will be back in a week’s time.”

That “one week” turned into two months. During which you cried yourself to sleep every night worrying to death about if he’d be okay. Some night you’d wake up in a cold sweat, have nightmares about him leaving you, him dying, him having an affair, him dying, him laughing to his friends about how stupid and pathetic and selfish you were, him dying! You had that one a lot. Various different ways popped into your head. Drowning, stabbing, beating, being shot, mauling, heart attack, an ability killing him.

On one fateful night though, you heard rustling coming from your basement. You went into the kitchen, grabbed a frying pan and crept into the basement. You heard a voice coming from your husband’s office down their.

“Where’s the first ad? No no no! Don’t you go dying on me!” 

You slowly slinked in, the lights off and the room only slightly illuminated by the many screens and monitors that adorned your husband’s desk. You tiptoed to the assailant and smacked him on the back of the head with your frying pan. You quickly ran to the light switch and flipped it on to see who had dared to enter your house.

“Fyodor? And a… clown? Wait… FYODOR! Your home! Oh no you’re bleeding!” You ran over to him, and chanted the incantation to unlock your special ability. 

“Moonlight bright and pure, lend me powers divine.  Give us second chance, let us have more time.  Just a minute more, a second too would be fine.  Please don’t leave me alone, give me back what’s mine.  You once were mine.”

“Did you miss me that much?” He smirked.

You buried your head in his chest crying, “I hate you.”

“No you don’t.” You could hear the smile in his voice.

“You’re right. You always are.”

“So since you have a new arm, can I keep the old one?” The other man said.

 You both turned to him. “I’m sorry, who are you?” You ask.

“Little mouse, this is my work colleague, Nikolai.”

“So this is your wife. She’s very pretty. He talks about you so often, whenever he’s not talking about his plans he rambles about you. Honestly though, his descriptions of you don’t do you justice.”

“Nikolai, get out of my house.”

“What about the arm?”

“If it gets you to leave me alone with my wife then you can keep it.”

“Alrighty then. I’ll see you around.” Nikolai disappeared into his cape.

Fyodor stood up and pulled you with him. “Love be careful. You nearly died.”

He shushed your concerns with a kiss, it was passionate and you couldn’t help kissing back. “Come on. For two months I’ve failed to fulfill you. I plan to make up for it tonight.”

“Fedya!” You blush.

He chuckled. “I love you, mouse.”

“I love you, too.”

[fy0lin]

obey mes just not being updated anymore, right? the way people r talking is making me worry the games are like being deleted or smth 😭

[kyouka-supremacy]

()

[aureatchi]

uni!au exchange student!fyodor who transfers all the way from russia to your uni !! you’re taking a new course for your major & it’s RIGOROUS, but the one thing you notice during attendance is the way “fyodor dostoevsky” rolls off of his tongue when he says it…you can’t help but turn to the side to steal a glance at the pretty ravenette beside you…

worst decision you’ve ever made tho. there’s no assigned seats ofc, yet you’re drawn to sit beside him every single time throughout the year. maybe it’s the way he chuckles w/ a smug smile every time you express a frustration on an assignment, or when he scores js a few points higher than you on an exam, or when you watch in awe as he flips through his notes, so neatly written out & organized…you always happen to catch him in the library too even though the rest of your classes are different — it’s like ur forever tied to him !! sometimes if he’s feeling nice he’ll inertly help you study…you can’t help but become flustered when he looks over your shoulder to see your textbooks or how close his face gets to yours when you’re sitting beside him…meanwhile he keeps the straightest face ever >:/ why is he playing w/ your feelings ??

little did you know tht he purposely got ahold of your schedule to figure out when you’d b studying in the library…tht he secretly found it cute whenever your brows furrowed in confusion & your little academic competition you had w/ him…how he placed his bookbag on the seat beside him to save your spot bcz you were the only exception to him not preferring others sitting by him…how he loved seeing your reactions whenever he got a bit too close to you (he would never do tht w/ anyone else on the campus). it’s not long before ppl start to notice you’re closer w/ the russian than most 🙂‍↕️

hello guys i js had to say miss lia gave me the topic of the week…uni au EXCHANGE STUDENT!FEDYA ?? ugh i fear i’m going to b distracted by him even more, when i come back i shall further elucidate on this 🙂‍↕️

[lnkedmyheart]

This is rambly but my thoughts so far:

Someone said this is Sigma's entrance exam and that could be it. Dazai leaving the rest of the mission to Sigma, Sigma's whole arc.

Dazai falling to his death in an elevator is funny cause that guy is unkillable. He aint dying and anyone saying otherwise is being deliberately obtuse.

We have good reason to believe Chuuya has broken free from the vampirism/mind control situation and it would be a stupid decision to not have him play any role here. So far Chuuya has done the bare minimum. Him working with Fyodor parallels Sigma switching sides. Except we know Chuuya would never betray his people, be it the PM or Dazai whereas Sigma had good reason to turn on Fyodor.

Fyodor seems a bit too cocky rn. A little TOO cocky if you ask me.

Chuuya is still behind Fyodor. Fyodor underestimates Sigma, doesnt know about Chuuya's anti mind control hat, appears to believe Dazai is about to die.

Fyodor has made the biggest mistake he could have made by calling skk's connection shallow, which is a set up for future pay off cause that was so out of left field and ridiculous and would be bad writing without said pay off.

Chuuya can control gravity/control the cables to slow down the descent of the elevator without his ability being nullified.

We didnt see Chuuya in the shot which showed the elevator with Dazai in it free falling, Fyodor losing his shit and Sigma being terrified. No Chuuya. It makes no sense to not have him in the shot. Where are you gravity boy? Off to rescue the damn fish again?

Sigma rescuing Dazai takes are actually quite interesting but I highly doubt Sigma would be able to rescue Dazai in any way. He also would have no reason to believe Dazai survived that fall. So honestly unless we get a character comeback it has got to be Chuuya. The latter also makes sense in regard to the skk bond slander from before.

I doubt we will see the Meursault girlies next chapter or anytime soon. Dazai is falling to his death, its a good time to take a year long break to switch POVs.

Anyway Chuuya, Fyodor abd Sigma are the major players left on the scene and if Dazai doesnt return soon for a "haha I lived bitch" reveal we have Sigma who has to now single handedly take on Fyoya, Fyodor who thinks Dazai is dead and Chuuya who is still a wild card that hasnt been used yet.

Also sigmazai moments for my bizai agenda. Yes Dazai, go around and kiss as many boys as you like. Live your boy kisser fantasies before mounting an elevator and falling to your almost death.

Yes I do be bullshitting about the sigmazai smooch but its close enough to looking like one. Imma be delulu and believe my brain farts cause bizai is more important to me than acting sane.

Fyodor brought in Chuuya because he knew it would get under Dazai's skin, which it did, Dazai proceeded to *drown* Chuuya (as if he didnt know Chuuya is an excellent swimmer since sb) while giving a gay ass speech and actually reminiscing all their moments (it meant something to him cause we were shown the moments as an audience, it wasnt just for show on his part), fyoya escaped and Fyo gave a whole "he's my tool now" speech and mocked skk's bond, something Dazai prides himself about) thereby confirming that Fyodor was convinced Dazai did not value Chuuya at all, meanwhile Chuuya is silent and hidden in the shadows this whole time clearly not a vampire, wearing his anti mind control hat, dazai proceeded to enter an elevator and fall to his death in a machine that has several parts not in direct contact with him. Fyodor lost it thinking Dazai died and Chuuya, the gravity manipulator is not in frame.

[spacexseven]

Inspired by the wonderful work of Tuna, and prince fyo and the numerous contributions of 🌺 with this ask and this ask + 🩹 ask

Links bc tumblr nerfted this once:

For prince fyo: https://www.tumblr.com/spacexseven/716304129101905920/ik-the-royal-au-is-my-ida-but-i-wanna-hear-more-of

🌺 1: https://www.tumblr.com/spacexseven/715673822625513472/im-the-possibilities-are-endlessss-like-at-first

🌺 2: https://www.tumblr.com/spacexseven/715545715174146048/this-is-not-a-request-but-like-im-rambling-my

dazai 🩹: https://www.tumblr.com/spacexseven/716312685221920768/tuna-tuna-princes-and-knights-you-are

Excellent Pieces and excerpts from the first fic:

“the maids that giggle about how weak he looks. even the other nobles don't hide their insults, spreading rumours that tarnish his reputation and drag his name through the mud though they knew nothing about him.”

“ as far as you're concerned, his highness prefers working from the shadows. he isn't as popular as the other princes, nor does he have any offensive skills to show—his influence is weak and his demeanor mild.”

“ He liked watching you leap up and put your life before his, even if the slightest scratch you received in return would lead to the complete annihilation of the person who planned the attack.”

“ He liked knowing that you had already dedicated your life to serving him. and if letting you believe he was weak would mean you coddled him even a little more, he didn't mind keeping up the appearances for a little longer.

“ but the charade had to end someday, and as he observed the look of admiration and surprise from you, who was witnessing him for his true nature,”

🦄: Okay! so this was a major inspiration for the rumors section of royal au. I liked the idea of rumors both by the public and more fabrication for power. I took some of the ideas presented in this concept fic and Used them for the au, especially with the Dazai and Fyodor section. Most of the princes have some drama in their lives and are considered black sheeps by the royal court of the kingdom. Fyodor was and still is one of the most ominous and dangerous of the princes, but he isn’t omniscient. The plan for “this” Fyodor is vague because I wanted to make space for any future installments or ideas expanding by anyone who wishes to add more thoughts to this au (feel free anybody!). However, something that was previously done in the drafts of the aus was him not being completely human (as the rumours say). The finished piece i sent you was running with idea that Fyodor might’ve be a homunculus of some kind, similar to Albedo (Genshin Impact) or a clone situation like Chuuya (underrated aspect of his lore) — or the fact that Fyodor might be a regressor or a transmigrator like Sigma. I also thought briefly in older drafts that Fyodor was a demon king who died and reincarnated every hundred years to attempt and restore his glory but fails as he get thwarted by a holy knight, but I didn’t want to put the Knight Darling into the ringer (Dazai does that for me).

on the princes:

🐟: chuuya my beloved :( cannot believe darling killed him bfr!! and the fact that he was genuinely trying to warn them about dazai </3 chuuya feels a lot more human than the others (ironic bcs of the 'imposter' rumors lol) but i cant help but wonder how different things would have been if darling followed chuuya instead of dazai…

okay so first: “ chuuya feels a lot more human than the others ” — YES! Thank you, this was on purpose and I'm glad I was able to properly showcase it. Chuuya is the most human and down to earth out of all the unhinged princes, but he still has red flags that don’t get shown because he dies early on in most timelines for being a slightly better human.

however, In some early drafts: “Chuuya is pretty to look at, and you wouldn’t have minded waking up next him if you didn’t know about the rotting lookalikes that lay chained to the chamber’s of his manor.” Uncanny valley “Chuuya.” my beloved + Draft! Dazai: “It’s a nightmare that you live between both reality and delusion. You lead each fair maiden and gentleman — sacrifices — into the maze and watchas Dazai lets the chain go off Akutagawa. The screams that follow always haunt you as you close your eyes”. The og drafts had awful royalty dazai that hunted people for sport since some of those “rumors” held some truth + plus cursed! aku. As you know by the previous answer, Fyodor has also gone through multiple different ideas, but frankly just thinking about an ambitious, always wanting and scheming human Fyodor is already enough nightmare fuel as it is.

Okay, So if darling followed Chuuya, Darling would end up dying. Chuuya is cursed by “something” that actually consumes anybody that takes the place of a “lover” by chuuya sides. As long as Chuuya doesn’t think about anybody as a “lover” the curse won’t affect them, but the moment Chuuya falls in love and starts fantasizing about Darling it always ends up with them dead. Rip Darling. Because of this, Darling never really gets to be a personal knight to Chuuya via Sigma intercepting and making sure Darling at least gets to live for a couple of more years.

Sigma is always working around this, and at the knight pledge event chuuya was out because his winery had been spiked and burglarized. Sigma is a good prince who’s acting like a guardian angel for Darling. So Darling would probably go for it (50 - a no for guilt of the past, but 50 - for yes for redemption) but it’s unlikely since Sigma will do anything to ensure darling’s survival. Sigma is always in bcakground, stressing and gathering more trauma with each loop he fails.

And yes, this the curse is somewhat of an open secret, and Dazai did have Chuuya Killed off partially because of this. He noticed Chuuya Attraction towards what is “his” and didn’t need the danger attached to it to possibly harm darling so chuuya had to go. (and if that information came from a certain jester attached to the hip of the fourth prince — well, he merely heard it from someone who told someone else about the rumours)

Chuuya was also aware of the possibility of a fellow “imposter” but didn’t know which prince it came from. All the princes have suspicious and secretive origins. Chuuya was searching for a fellow “outsider” as he saw himself be. rip chuuya. however, he is pretty unhinged later on when he gets to live longer.

🐟 : I love prince dazai :((( even if hes a little bit scummy i adore him and his terrible ways <3 love the idea of him picking out a weapon for darling and engraving his name onto it before giving it to them like a constant reminder of whose grace they're under ahh the thought of him avenging everyone who hurt darling even after their death is soo yummy loosing his mind bc the guilt and the way he failed to save you is eating him up. (also the line; a different monster will lead you astray is soo mmmm)

Thank you! I genuinely had a lot fun writing for the Dazai part, lowkey got converted to the Dazai base via 🩹 and their dazai asks. They really fueled a lot of Dazai’s character when I went to look back to see how Dazai would act and behave. You mentioned how Dazai would feel about breaking his darling, and even if in this au Dazai is slightly Yan (more scummy and unhinged than full yan (for now)) that did inspire me to make him the “first love that betrayed” trope in typical manhwa otome isekai. Chuuya would contrast him by being the “green flag” of the duo. The collar asks also came into play because I was super duper close to writing Dazai collaring the Knight as a sign of ownership before backpedaling into a dagger. I’m a coward Tuna. I love it when in media Lovers use or push away their beloveds and lose their mind when said beloved dies by their accidental plans backfiring or going the wrong way than what they expected. its so good watching them lose their minds be it self destructing or destroying everyone else.

And yeah: a different monster will lead you astray - I loved that line and i had to rewrite some aspects of the au to fit it! im glad it stood out of you too!!

🐟: i love the comparison of fyodor and dazai, how darling 'chooses' fyodor this time bc they see dazai in him...also very curious that his death was overwritten in their memory hmm i wonder why. i think maybe the fact that fyodor was weak and seemingly defenseless except for his words and his charm, unlike dazai who always seemed to be dangerous to everyone, was what ultimately attracted darling this time? maybe they want to believe he would need them more than dazai did, and wouldn't betray them after all?

Yes! Darling likes feeling needed. They also were looking for someone they deemed as good natured (🫠 yeah…) and they found it within Fyodor. However Darling is very unreliable and actually went with Fyodor because he’s filled with rumors to brim like Dazai and is unconsciously searching for pieces of Dazai in anothers and immediately ignores the red flags and pledges their loyalty and support to Fyodor. They know deep down that it’s their past going to repeat itself but it feels familiar and so much like dazai. They need to feel like they won’t be thrown away and Fyodor doesn’t have as many allies or any true allies that have enough political or physical power, so maybe Fyodor will hesitate with throwing them away unlike Dazai.

(Darling is really going through it. They have abandonment and trust issues.)

Fyodor and Darling are using each other and exploiting their weakness but it's also depressing because they’re getting closer to each other than anyone else before (rip sigma). Fyodor likes the fact that Darling needs him and depends on him. He starts leaving some blindspots open because he knows Darling will cover them. There was a situation in which darling got poisoned and all hell broke loose. Darling doesn’t recall this as they were astral proejecting via poison, but they remember a “weird dream” where fyodor was nursing them back to health before an odd jester would come at night and babble about a life in “Yokohama?” 👀

Fyodor killed the og “sigma” because he was useless and cruel, someone who was unnecessary and incompetent in every manner. In return by sacrificing the soul of the crown prince, he would get “an all powerful and amazing ally that would bring anybody to their knees.”

and… he got sigma.

anyway to mister sad isekai himself!

🐟: i love love love prince sigma. seriously he'd be pretty good at it, with his dedication to his post, if not because of his general insecurities. i wonder who's really pulling the strings here, fyodor, nikolai or someone else? im really curious about nikolai's part in all this...sigma realizing he and darling are connected by fate and death and all else is insane!! makes for a great development. because now not only does his life (and return to life) depend on them, it's in his best interest to keep them by his side. seeing them work for fyodor hardly eases his mind, however, because he knows the fourth prince has something else planned, and maybe he already is aware of sigma's connection to darling...?

Crown prince sigma is one of my faves in this au. He’s very dedicated and attempts to be somewhat of a neutral party as the crown prince and avoiding conflict with his rival princes.

THEY ARE (somewhat unfortunate) SOULMATES!!! Sigma is doing his best while navigating his whole isekai life experience and is going through it x100 because the one person he loves can’t stay alive. It doesn’t help in some timelines darling manages to get hitched be it the princes or some randoms (see: ex-prince candidate and former archduke turned scholar fukuzawa, scholar apprentice ranpo, rival scholar and poet poe, investing nobleman fitzgerald, ex-prince candidate and wandering plague doctor yosano, royal detective and ex-consort candidate ayatsuji, consort candidate tsujimura, Poet and court lady Kouyou, commoner turned errand boy atsushi, that one weirdo novelist conman who disappears and makes really weird face (sigma got conned by oguri in a timeline and keeps a grudge and it grows worse when you and oguri get together), and the list keeps going on and on. darling is a popular suitor who pulls people in by their whimsical and depressing hopeful desperation for a place to belong and feel needed in.)

Sigma does keep knight darling close and he struggles with reputation since his memory grows fuzzy with each timeline that keeps happening. Is he the hated crown prince or the glorious king? Sigma doesn’t know.

Darling did ran away only once with Sigma. It was the quickest death for both because all that sigma remembers was a coat and booming laughter turned into anguish sobbing.

and now, drumming sound: about our dear jester and favorite clown man, Nikolai knows more about the time shenanigans than Fyodor. and from all the little bits and pieces i have been throwing around in here, you can already tell that Nikolai isn’t a good person in this cursed au.

He isn’t happy about it, but Nikolai personally kills knight darling in all the timelines. He won’t allow it to be done by any other hand, it has to be his own hands that take their life. so why does he kill darling? because darling is his sk darling and can’t stand a life where they’re “confined” to another.

yeah, buckle up because its gonna get weird. my brain likes making everything complicated and nonsensical.

Nikolai recalls a life where he fell in love with a serial killer. In this life, their relationship in a city, yokohama, and culture and jobs are different. He is happy and free with his beloved. He even has a dos-kun! Happy, happy, happy! He can’t recall how it happend, but sk darling dies, and then Nikolai dies. his memories blur after that. he can’t remember anything after sk reader’s death.

He’s reborn in a world where only the powerful get chosen and rule.

The original crown prince candidate that stepped down to become a mere royal jester. oh the drama! His name is forgotten, only to be linked back to a jester and few nobles who share bare minimum of similarities. The suprise he feels is all to real when he meets a baby version of prince fyodor. It hit it off like always and it all comes coming down when that prophet comes into his life.

A prophet, who only appeared in the original and first timeline because Nikolai is always careful with making sure in snapping his neck before he can arrive to the palace and utter those cursed words.

“A knight born on the day of origin of the kingdom with the past of hunter will lead the kingdom and the future king to prosperity as long they blossom by the side of their true king. the world will wither and break if the tyrant king takes the throne.”

Among the hundreds of people and millions of citizens, only one person who was found to have signed up to be knight. Among the thousands of people it could’ve been it had to be his beloved.

The look that Fyodor gave him when Nikolai fell to knees and laughed like madman is one that Nikolai will never forget — especially the confused and scared look that darling had which contrasted and rivaled the annoyed, confused, and slight murderous look that all the other princes had.

It was a bloodbath and the worst timeline. His darling was treated more like a prize than a person and watching them wither away, killed something inside him. It was awful to watch darling lose their freedom and be confined to a place to ensure they keep the prophecy into the “proper road.” lest it becomes a tragedy. They take darling’s freedom away and with it, something breaks inside their mind and something else stirs inside. something awfully familiar. However this Nikolai is kinder and even has a far better sense of “morals” as this Dos-kun comments. So, naturally he does his best to save his beloved even if it always end in futile death. People grow desprate when they’re cornered and neither darling, nor Nikolai are any different than them.

It ends with Nikolai holding you each night as you weep miserably for him to end it all. Eventually, the treatment of being seen as a prize and tool for the princes and members of the court take their toll on you, and you simply stop talking.

In another world, Nikolai committed many, many awful crimes, and who would ever say that Nikolai can’t simply do it again? nobody. And so nikolai drowns himself in red and magic that resembles his old ability.

(what nobody else but Nikolai knows in the distant future: Every time darling wakes up from their dreams, they feel less hopeful for something. they notice the way people move, speak, and sometimes they feel so vex for magic users who are simply so.. so, so, so boring! they have abilities why do aren’t being creative with them?)

It didn’t matter how hard he tried but his plans always seemed to fail even with outside help.

In the original timeline that his darling lived: the world ends with a familiar grin painted on their face, even the kindest and most patient of people grow tired and apathetic into brutality after facing so much. they dance together as the world gets destroy and Nikolai wakes up once again.

and again. again. again. againagain-

it’s rather easy for someone already toeing the line between delusions and reality to lose their minds when they’re stuck in a bizarre time loop.

Nikolai isn’t sure what is causing the time loop, but he is aware that only he is able to properly recall it. until he arrives of course.

The he bumbling, buffoon, arrogant, and downright idiotic crown prince sigma is trying his best. an anomaly is occuring and Nikolai is losing it. He tried everything. he’s killed the princes. destroyed the kingdom. cursed the kingdom. saved the kingdom. acted as the king. married his darling, and yet everyone still dies no matter what he does.

Sigma remembers too. His darling is remembering as well, but it’s different. Instead of standing by Nikolai side… darling always seems to be pulled by sigma, and that is perhaps the final straw that breaks the camel’s back.

This Sigma who almost broke and brought back some sort of relief to darling, but it wasn’t him. it wasn’t nikolai who was next you.

(why can’t they see that he’s saving from the awful imprisonment that has been placed on them? they’re so caged into a loop that doesn’t change no matter what they do. and even if does change if darling gets with sigma, Nikolai can’t and won’t accept that. it wasnt love at first sight the first life and neither in the second one, but they eventually got there, didn’t they? So in this 100000th life Nikolai will make sure the two you get the proper life you both deserve)

I’m sorry if this all confusing.

and to explain the whole drafting idea, ahhhhhh here: okay to explain just how unhinged and confusing this au became i give you the backstory that came into existence via your birthday in 2 hours and 34 minutes.

This is an unhinged au because it’s actually an sk au in disguised, and i throw you the utter nonsense this au started off with: originally an ability user got the dropped on sk reader and some of their suitors and they woke up in a hazy like dream world where they played out the storyline. This idea then spinned out of control into an isekai au with sigma dying via getting murdered by sk reader and nikolai (they were on a date) and sigma waking up in a parallel universe. It got more derailed into a sigma isekai horror plot with an omniscient nikolai who remembers all the timeline and is attempting to bring back his “darling” (see: sk reader) via terrible time loops and mind breaking them. Something about soul swaps and sacrificed people with a literal devil! Nikolai and an uncanny valley, not human, creature being reborn into prince! fyodor. It was meant for more horror and yan centric, but I also wanted more mushy and fluffy vibes (wow wasn’t fluffy through the angst??/joking) so i decided to give more redemption and background to the characters instead of having a purely outsider horror pov.

so does draft! nikolai kill darling for them to “turn” into sk darling?? yeah kinda but nikolai also loves this kinder aspect of darling so he conflicted and mourning it. and then it went into the world end and darling having to meet their proper soulmate to save the world, but nikolai doesn’t believe in soulmates but im freedom and choice.

this au spiral from the first idea into multiple different aus in a matter of minutes since i wanted to give you something fresh and new instead of any of my backlog stories or unfinished wips for your birthday. It literally got out of control and I had to revise and rewrite until I found it worthy enough to get sent out as a present for you.

None of my ideas are though out. i think about i once and write before putting it in my notes and never checking about it in months. I think you’re far better about this than me. most of my things are wips. we’re both doing our best and wishing you luck and happy days to come!

my brain is a little hamster ball that spins and ends up everywhere and anywhere.

I’m so so sorry Tuna about me rambling in the ask box. I just had a really wacky and fun time writing this concept for you - 🦄 (Tumblr pls don’t nerf this)

you know the first time i tried answering this my laptop crashed and because of that i will be trying to keep this reply concise TT i think it may be the size that it couldn't handle </3

quickly before we start. i need to take a moment and say Wow because this is 3k words in an askbox and if that number isn't surreal i think the fact that you took almost 3 hours for the original ask is?!?! absolutely insane. that is an astounding amount of dedication and i suddenly feel a little shy and i wish words could encapsulate how much joy this brought me. (after all, i am a reader before a writer, and who doesn't enjoy getting to see such wonderful ideas?) so much respect to you and thank you so so much, really. it's amazing to see what you have and i'm really so honored to be able to see and respond to it like this :)

fyodor lore...i think regressor fyodor may work, in which case i believe he will be the first to realize that he's not the only one who remembers his past lives. maybe this could work into why he's so involved with sigma and darling, despite them not having any reason to be connected w each other. it must be irritating to know that both sigma and darling play a role in his plans, because they become an unpredictable variable now. sigma, at least, remembers a lot of his deaths and lives, so the only way fyodor can rein him in is by keeping a close eye on him.

darling is an anomaly, though, since they don't appear to remember more than the first life with dazai. based on sigma's Many deaths, I'd suppose there are more where darling has experienced, but can't remember, for some reason or another. i'm inclined to believe a certain prince with an affinity for magic may have something to do with that, or perhaps it's the new court jester whose gaze doesn't seem to leave darling...except, that's not even their first life, is it? they've probably lived a hundred more without knowing. which is crazy...

i like to think there was a life where darling stayed by fyodor's side forever, but even as he achieved his plans and became king, there's nothing that changes. he just wakes up to see darling in their ordinary uniform with their ordinary weapon, and no sign of the sword he gave them, but the hope that he could win them over again is all he needs to try again. maybe the memories linger, and sometimes darling walks past fyodor's room only to suddenly remember a time when they were knelt by fyodor's bedside and huh? when did that happen?

the cursed aku thing reminded me of the minotaur story </3 poor aku i'll save you </3 (adds him to the list of Characters I Will Save)

chuuya's curse is...interesting. i doubt he'd be able to live long with a curse like his, because how does he know it only kills a lover he has? what if he believed it may kill anyone by his side? so, if there's any one who doesn't die, he might begin to believe that they aren't entirely loyal to him, hence why they weren't dead yet. eventually the loneliness and paranoia gets to him and he's just destined for a tragic end either way. the greatest mercy for him is a death before he learns the true extent of his curse. but chuuya is really clever, so i guess it's inevitable that he does realize what his curse is. either way, it's a miserable existence. :(

because fyodor easily views everyone else as pawns, i don't think he'll be so upset at the idea of darling using him to satisfy whatever feelings they have. maybe they hope to learn why dazai betrayed them by working with fyodor, if only to satiate their own curiosity. it doesn't matter, anyway, because fyodor ensures that once darling takes the pledge to put fyodor's life before theirs, they would only have eyes for him.

(and… he got sigma. i'm crying about this line. come on fyodor, it doesn't get better than sigma :>)

omg...sigma...all his lives are angst-coded. him having to watch his literal soulmate fall in love with some less than favorable people (but it's worse when darling falls for the actual good ones, the ones he knows will keep darling happy. it hurts because he knows he can never give darling that content lifetime with no worries about crazy jesters and cunning princes). at the very least, he hopes to break the curse so at least one of you could be happy.

ultimately his role has always been for another; a replacement for the previous crown prince, a pawn for fyodor, and now, he exists as darling's counterpart in this strange revival/death thing, but he doesn't really mind when it concerns them. for once, he plays the role of the protector, of the one in charge, and they aren't privy to his plans. and he knows his intentions are pure, his role in their life will always be of their own benefactor. he's the one who makes sure they don't go hungry in the lives they're imprisoned or banished, and he's the one who ensures darling and their partner live well in the lives they leave the palace. he's the one who stops them from getting too close to chuuya, and tries to ward off fyodor's watchful gaze (unaware of his knowledge), and desperately attempts to keep nikolai away. but after all this, he cannot ask them to pledge their life to him, not after knowing the cruel end darling will face by doing so.

this nikolai twist is Insane. Like woahhh where do i go from here?!

i think nikolai carries a lot of resentment at himself (and the world) because of how his life w sk darling ended. why didn't he save them? why did he end up here? how did things turn out this way? and he's more infuriated that the once free and unreadable soul, bloodstained and calculating, that lured him in and trapped him all those years ago became...this other person, this foolish, compassionate knight of all things. it's quite ironic. darling still kills now, but not because they can, not because they want to, only because they have to for whichever pathetic prince they've decided to serve.

and it's horrible because here, darling has never done anything to warrant such a cruel fate, but they've been subjected to a painful life as long as the stupid prophecy exists. he wonders, bitterly, if this is their past catching up with them, punishment for a crime they don't even remember committing.

but as the lives turn by and everyone takes notice of darling, nikolai finds himself starting to learn more about them, too. he learns that their eyes burn with the same silent fury when anything irritates them, that their lips curl in the same way when they notice something amusing, and that they're still just as dedicated to their work, whether it be murder or serving a prince. and i think. nikolai feels some guilt for starting to like knight darling, who's more compassionate/warm than the original sk reader. maybe he feels like he's betraying them by doing so, because he may have 'reverted' back to his 'original' state, but darling is entirely different where it matters. this darling doesn't understand his ideas and thoughts, they would never approve of his crimes, and worst of all, they don't even care for him.

not once in their many lives did they spare him more than a single glance, except when he killed them to reset the timeline. and each time, they looked at him like they didn't understand, like they couldn't recognize him. but when sigma came in and started helping, darling recalled those moments. even when serving fyodor, they seemed to remember their past. but not with nikolai.

he's not sure what's worse; falling for someone who will never understand him, or having someone not even remember a single moment after spending thousands of lives together.