#rambles from discord

[alfredojesta]

hc stuff ... or au rewrite stuff ?!

nathan's powers are temporary ghost magic. same things crystal could do but limited. he can phase through stuff. just disappear and reappear, and hes good at sensing spirits around him. he can also communicate with ghosts hence why hes a medium

i think when his powers activate, his eyes have a purple glow bc i Always liked that idea HAHA (and i associate crystal with the colour purple)

candy pop gave nathan his powers—indirectly. basically, crystal requested that candy pop fuse her soul with nathan's, so that she could finally rest, no longer be a roaming spirit. and nathan could learn how to fend for himself.

crystal died when they were both 11. she was always stuck as an 11 yr old following nathan around as he grew up, being a protector for him. nathan was dependent on her, and also couldn't get over the fact she was dead in the first place. having her as a spirit only deteriorated his health, as he kept believing she was still alive.

the fact nathan got to grow up and crystal lost her life so soon is tragic bc theyre IDENTICAL TWINS and nathan looks at himself in the mirror sometimes and he just sees crystal. or... what COULD have been crystal. if only she had the opportunity to grow up.

candy pop and nathan are bestfriends, but also, candy pop watched him grow up to be the person he is today. their bond is as familial as it is friendly. i imagine nathan has a difficult time, at first, coming to terms with candy pop helping him. nathan wants to be independent, not rely on the help of a stupid fairy. but he js can't deny the fact candy pop has gotten him through so much.

nathan's emotions sometimes get the better of him, and he regrets it later on. he thinks he can just take it out on candy pop sometimes since candy pop is sort of a doormat, and really just wants to be there for nathan.

ive been imagining the nathan and candy pop argument scene to go like this but im too lazy to write it at the moment, so here's a skeleton of it:

candy pop comes to his Really Shitty Abandoned Home and nathan's mad or smth and candy pop's like "hi ^_^ here's some food" But then nathan verbally attacks him asking him "why do you keep coming back???" "why do you treat me as if i'm weak???" "i don't need your fucking help jester" and then candy pop's like "wha! wait... calm down :o" and nathan laughs at him (he RARELY ever smiles or laughs)

hes like "yeah. okay. okay fine i'm calm then i'm calm" and then he punches candy pop and candy pop reacts by taking a step back and then nathan tries to choke him out, going on about how he wants candy pop to LEAVE and never fucking come back but candy pop kicks him off and pulls out his hammer

candy pops reaction is out of instinct . but as he looks out, nathans on the floor and hes just breaking down, yelling at candy pop and telling him to just fucking kill him already because theres no point to living anymore. But Candy Pop can't do it. so he just Lowers the hammer and tells nathan that there IS a point to living. he reminds nathan of his sister. he reminds nathan of how far he's come, and how things will get better, if only he puts in the effort. and then he's like "I will never come back here ever again." <- leaving on his own terms

he thanks nathan for being his friend... gives him some more words of encouragement... but when candy pop leaves and nathan is getting his shit tgthr hes constantly muttering to himself about how candy pop wasnt a friend and how he actually hated his dumbass fairy guts... (he's lying to himself) (he's coping)

afterwards, nathan grows up on his own. he's living in scotland at this point and he meets ciara :) they're together only for... three years? they train together, talk together, and they fall deeply in love hehe... that's until nathan has to relocate because he got a job as an assassin and couldn't stay in one place for too long. they're still keeping in contact with each other. long distance style relationship, although ciara is super bitter about it... so's nathan but at that moment it's for the better.

when candy pop and nathan reunite it's when nathan moved to london. nathan spots candy pop first, initiates an interaction. apologises. updates him on his life and just thanks candy pop. hes like "sorry i wouldnt have been alive without your help ;-; i missed you—" "YOU MISSED MEEEE?!?!?!" "WHAT" and then candy pop hugs him and all is forgiven because that's his child Right there. ALSO NATHAN TELLS HIM ABT CIARA HES LIKE "yeah theres this really hot girl who was talking about a blue jester tha killed her brother pretty sure thats u" "OH!"

(I FORGOT TO MENTION CANDY POP ACCIDENTALLY KILLED KIRAN IN MY AU LOL) (more on that in another post)

[greenbirdtrash]

I present to you.....Mary Goore's Mayhem tramp stamp. Do you agree

[fumifooms]

What if we were both magic prodigies and it otherized us in different ways and we devoted ourselves to protecting a family member who has general other goals & priorities. What if we both did self-sacrifical devotion in opposite ways.

What if we were dark mirrors of each other and where I've grown overcontrolling you've grown complacent. What if, bought as a servant into a pretty loving home, ownership and control is what love looks like to me, and to you neglected and lonely growing up, love is gratefully taking any scraps of it you’re lent.

By belonging to someone, even if she comes back injured or fails at finding Delgal, she feels like she belongs and is cherished, by owning someone he feels safe in them not leaving him.

She’s what’s tethering him do you see… And he’s the only thing giving her direction and purpose in her state. She needs a compass and he needs a support.

They’re both so out of it 😭 It’s the weirdly intense and unearned mutual trust and reliance on each other?? They’re each other’s weird little comfort codependent teddy bear. Or at least they were headed towards that before SHE DIED THEN HE DIED THEN THEY BOTH FORGOT ABOUT EACH OTHER AND NEVER MET EVER AGAIN. Though she’s also the guard attack hound keeping him safe… And vice versa he heals her and can rewrite her very being with just one wave of his hand. They’re both so so mentally and physically vulnerable both but they cling onto each other. They can’t perceive things accurately but despite it all someway somehow they stumble into something closer to resembling companionship just before they both die. Falin is just that kind and Thistle is just that lonely. Overworked.

We both haven’t lived for ourselves in a very long time, haven’t we.

They both have a similar devotion to the people they love but again the difference is that Thistle starts overtsepping while Falin is self-effacing. The other difference between them is that people care about Falin <3 People have given up on Thistle long ago, and he has given people reasons to, while people refuse to give up on Falin. Yaad has a mini arc about it dw about it it’s ok he’s not all alone in the end 😭😭 He reached out for Marcille’s hand but they already all wanted to help him, they just had to be given the chance to, Yaad just had to be given the chance to, it’s okay I’m okay

Hey what if we learned to get in touch with our own identity and the world around us and living in the present again through being in the worst codependent situationship ever.

Falin and Thistle sitting in a tree, sucking on flowers together because they’re h-u-n-g-r-y 💕💕💕

I bet he’s only ever thought of flowers as useless ornaments. Weak weeds. But she shows him they’re tasty and useful and good and pretty in their own right too and deserve existing without proving their worth and waaa <33 Thistles…... Did you know thistles taste sweet if you remove the thorns and eat them?

"Even as a chimera, her kind nature remains" you can’t suppress her in the way that matters. You can’t soothe him in the way that matters. It’s doomed. You’re doomed. It’s all doomed. Save me.

[lonelyoleander]

i'm front row at their wedding sobbing violently and shaking like a frightened animal

[skybristle]

dm: i need an enemy to put in this dungeon so my newbie players don't get sweeped

the pitiful goblin:

[charli3emily]

A deep dive into the character of Ralph🐚

It is directly stated in chapter 4 that Ralph was one of the most comfortable about being on the island and his earlier actions shows thisThe only time he was show to feel worried was when he was forced to face reality(mulberry boys death,the war,getting rescued,ect). We also know that his life before the island had likley been falling apart. His mother was gone for some reason(as yk i hc her as dead which is the most common theory) and the war had gotten to a point where he needed to return to the Navy leaving him alone. He was in a new school(the boarding school which is all brought up in chapter 7) and likely shortly after the war has gotten to a point where they needed to be sent of to saftey. Those itself would be incredibly stressful for any kid of his age but adding in all of the previous changes it would be too much for anyone to deal with. So when he survived a crash and ended up in this paradise like place(which he likely had already dreamed of or loved in some way due to his original intrest of coral island which was brought back in that graphic novel) this would almost feel like an escape from the harsh reality he has been living in for atleast a few months. This would explaine why is reaction why his initial reaction came off as so odd. He was exited because he finally got an escapeHe also then gained a position of leadership(similar to his father who he is show to look up to) and a friend(Jack) taht he was finally able to get close too(Ralph is highly implied to move around as a child which would make making and keeping friends very difficult). Ralph loved the island so much because it was the first real escape he had. And having to accept reality took this feeling of stability away and forced him to accept that things where it good. We also know that this wild nature was somthing he had previously loved. In chapter 10 he brings up his last home again and how he loved the wild nature(which at that point he no longer loved) so the island would be even more enjoyable. When piggy once again mentioned rescue in chapter 4 and immediately after Ralph saw the boat he was still in the ehad space of dealing wirh reality which explains why he reacted so strongly. And of course the fact that he wa sthe cheif and it felt like his responsibility .This also makes the island falling apart even sadder because it was the only good thing he had left and it was stolen in 6 days with a weight that fell directly on his shoulder. And in the end he is confront with reality for the last time when the naval officer reprimand him for not doing enough to keep things in order despite him doing all taht he good in teh situation he was put in. And we know that war was still clearly going on(chapter 6 with the dead parachutes) so he was also forced to go back to that grim reality after the book concluded. Thsi would be 100 times worse if the original cannon of the nuclear bomb destroying London was still cannon.

If anyone chose to fully read this thank you

[mapicccc]

kit was changed from netherrite to make fights shorter and less grindy. kit was changed from prot 4 to remove need for so much exp, thus making fights. shorter and less grindy. kit was changed to allow restocks to???? make fights???? longer???? and a 1000 times more grindy?????????

[eastgaysian]

returning from unplanned semi-unofficial hiatus. sincerest apologies to anyone who was trying to contact me while i was away.

my wrists are doing a lot better, but i'm still erring on the side of caution to avoid any more damage that will take a month+ to recover from. having to take a break made it clear it's unsustainable for me as one person to be consistently online/respond to everyone/offer donation commissions all at the same time.

at the moment the plan is to keep more of an eye on my mentions (mentioning me to rb something is always fine) and pick up spotlighting mohammed and farah haboub's campaign again. i cannot promise being online consistently or directly responding to everything, but i will try to at least share any campaigns that are sent my way and donate what i can.

[jaynovz]

I'm watching 1.7 and the break in Flint's voice when Gates is questioning him in the stable and he's like "I'm trying to answer the question" is devastating. The facial acting that Toby is doing here is like, he does great body language here and the trembling voice and nervous swallowing and darting eyes, you can see him trying to stave off some kind of extreme anxiety attack. Because. Like. God the flashbacks he must be having to London and Hennessey and Alfred Hamilton. Anyway, what he is saying just gets more and more desperate throughout the exchange, but legit he is trying to level with Gates the only way that he can in this moment. There is no version of Flint right now who could tell the whole truth, bc of his background, bc of the trauma, bc of what happened last time he trusted someone like that. So when we see what appears to be a mental BREAK, and he tells Gates his vision of sequestering a portion of the Urca gold for the future of Nassau and their men, that's him trying to explain his motivation the best way he can.

And the worst part is, he just sounds crazy and meglomaniacal and Machiavellian and DERANGED. It's exactly the wrong thing to say to Gates at that moment, they have already broken apart, it's too little too late, it's ten years too late!! Gates is hearing a lying maniac being conniving and cold and awful about Billy. But tbh, when I hear Flint say "He fell. Why? What do you think happened?" I just hear someone that WE KNOW doesn't know in his heart of hearts WHAT HE DID, WHAT HAPPENED, and he just... it would be easier if someone just told him.

I know we joke about Flint being full of SHIT, and he is in MUCH of the show, he does SO MUCH LYING. But this entire exchange doesn't feel like that. It feels like he's cracking and reaching and grasping and trying. And he has no earthly idea what path he would even take to get Gates back on side.

Gates says, "This is what we do. You orate and you dissemble and I look the other way..."

And the saddest fucking part, the most tragic of the tragedy is that HE'S NOT WRONG. That is what they do!! and it's. It's over! It's too much!

But poor fucking Captain, he just... He doesn't know how else to be.

And with regard to SilverFlint, and their arc... I've been thinking this go round about why it's different from Flint's relationship with Miranda or with Gates or with anyone...

And, well... It really is just a case of finding deep understanding from a person you never expected, isn't it?

At first it is extremely begrudging, because he doesn't have another choice, unwilling allies due to strife. But eventually it does becomes voluntary.

At its core, I think the reason that relationship is different, is because that becomes clear to Flint over time, and then he is able to offer up all the sides of himself to be further collated and understood.

And then faster than the speed of fucking light we get to 3.10 and 4.9: "You asked me where I began, and I felt that you were entitled to an answer. To the truth." and "I cannot do it without you." Silver says, "We might be friends by then" and by fuckin god they ARE. "As my partner as my friend" and "You know of me all I can bear to be known. All that is relevant to be known. That is to say, you know my genuine friendship and loyalty." So, what I've been circling is... sitting down in the woods and just telling Silver everything that happened in London is exactly what he can't do with Gates in 1.7 :////

[solomiracle]

i wanna be able to thumbs down lucifer's texts in a gc just to see how he would react

[aroaceleovaldez]

Something something Jason feeling like he doesn't quite fit as "Greek" or "Roman" as a metaphor for bisexuality, particularly the semi-canonical bi-coding in his half of experiences during the Cupid scene and how Favonius and Cupid speak to him in parallel to the scenes confirming Nico is gay.

Something something the camps as metaphors for traditionally acceptable forms of relationships and Nico living as a rogue outside of them, rejecting expectation (ergo in himself representing a metaphor of queer identity and living outside of boxes and defined/usually hetero-allonormative/binary ideas of what love/relationships should look like) versus Jason struggling with the expectation to conform to a label and even discussing with Nico both of them remaining at CHB together.

Something something the inverse of Jason shifting away from the camps after he breaks up with Piper, feeling lost and unable to find a place between the camps as he begins to explore his queer identity properly for the first time versus Nico only remaining at CHB because he has entered a relationship. In this essay I will-

[akuma-tenshi]

did i ever actually post this

og

[morhido]

Anyway who wants to hear about my extremely self-indulgent crack spiderman!jimmy au

[fumifooms]

The ultimate dogboy in Dunmeshi to me isn’t Laios, Lycion or even Kuro. It’s Mickbell.

Little dog man’s never had enough. Little dog man has someone in his hands already but it’s not all that he’s wanted and craved. He’s hungered for so long and now he doesn’t know what can quench it. When you’ve been hungry, once you have something it’s hard to not binge eat it because you never know when you’ll lose it. He wants more from them, more of them, more to chew, more safely locked within his teeth, more to taste on his tongue. Hungry greedy unkempt misbehaved. I think he loves like a dog I think he slobbers and digs his teeth in because he doesn’t want to let his bone go and he’s hungry and starved.

And he’s not like Laios he’s not like Kuro he’s not like Lycion, calling him a dog in any way would be the greatest offense to him but also it’s true. Sorry. Dogboy against your consent. You better be ready to unpack a lot of stuff you don’t like hearing about yourself!!!! The unwilling dogboy analogies are the most interesting ones get out Laios and Lycion. Mick doesn’t want to be a dog, it’s dehumanizing, demeaning, but he is, he loves like a dog.

Feeling dehumanized and demeaned by loving so much, by being walked on a leash by your feelings until your body acts on instinct like it’s primal and animalistic, for feelings you cannot control, and you’re drooling you’re drooling you’re clawing teeth snapping but you’re on hands and knees begging for scraps and treats. Just a dog picking up crumbs of a fine meal from where it’s dropped on the floor, affection from coerced hands, peanuts of self-esteem from judging others, anything to soothe while surviving.

It will come back by Hozier save me. "I love like a dog" and everyone is unhappy about this, it’s too much for everyone involved, 10/10. Dunmeshi animalistic metaphors you never miss. Stray dog mick. If I don’t use a dog motif in my mick fics it’s not me someone is impersonating me

This was my train of thought for the mickbell & kuro web weaving i made a while ago I guess. Dog imagery mickbell you will always get to me…

Little dog man wants a white picket fence family and house, somewhere someone to belong to :( Okay that’s more Kuro actually, happy to just have his little kennel day after day just following his owner, shackling yourself for the love. Ough.

Mickbell, my ultimate dogboy... He plays the part so well (derogatory)

Coughing blood

[ahalliance]

antoine in chat god bless 🙏🙏🙏

[diegogtratty]

Been seeing a specific type of post popping up about this community more lately. Specifically, talking about how some things are overdone to death.

So I have to ask. Not why these things are overdone, no. But why some feel the need to ruin other people's parties, purely for sticking to what they like.

If the problem is that you hate that stuff, maybe consider, I dunno, letting them be? They make that stuff because they like it? Who would've thought?

If the problem is that they're not making stuff you like, recognize that people have different preferences, and consider making or commissioning it yourself?

I wholeheartedly mean that last point incredibly hard. Being in a niche community, with niche preferences, does make it plenty difficult to find stuff you'll enjoy, I get that all too well. But that doesn't mean I'll complain until stuff magically spawns upon my screen.

Often times for niche stuff, someone has to be the first person to make something happen, because otherwise, who knows if someone else will.

And not just making it once, no. Rather, make multiple things, big or small in scope. Write the concept or story down. Draw or edit it out briefly. Get the idea out there.

But above all, be persistent. Outlive. Survive. Just because it isn't popular on your first post, it doesn't mean that you should give up trying. Especially if it's something you're genuinely passionate about.