#if you have the energy to yap. you have the energy to contribute to a solution by your own will.

[filurig]

ok vague kind of thing i have pondered for a bit and might bring somre more Fantasticalness to pareidolia but yes. Weird shroom. more attempt at... clarification under the cut maybe cuz i feel this is kind of... wishy wooshy LOL

many nonhumans in pareidolia have adapted to use anda to fuel certain abilities. anda is a form of energy which usually drives sapience and perception/visual interpratation, but can also do more if paired with other forms of energy etc. for example lindwurms can communicate telepathically using certain low frequency vibrations paired with anda resonance. yes its a bit whimsy in how that works but yea.

so i imagine actually the glow is both a regular real glow, but the nature of that glow is amplified in these shrooms because of the fact that they produce anda with that heat/light.

But essentially ill pull an example here. so crakam have this visual illusion ability that naturally and unconsciously befalls upon a certain radius of a crakam settlement, because all crakam (like all sentient animals) radiate some anda. they just radiate a bit more of it than many other animals, and when they are all together this contributes to an illusion which shrouds them to a certain radius for anyone who isnt "read" by the anda as part of the "flock".

a drawback here is that the radius of the illusion risks shrinking if one individual/a few go too far away, because the strength of the illusion depends on how many are present. and also like just generally the area of the illusion would remain pretty small around the settlement.

with wisplight however, crakam have created a type of "vessels" which hold concentrated wisplight "blooms", which they connect to a central large wisplight vessel in the middle of the settlement. these vessels exude large amounts of anda, and because they are fed with feathers from the flock, they "read" to the collective illusion as "flock members", and extend the radius that way.

this has also been done with haeggir (tomte) area illusions, which can obscure large areas by confusing any people who have not been "allowed" into that particular illusion by fucking with their perception and tricking them into walking somewhere else (basically, if there is a straight forest path youre walking, it makes you visually see things as if you are walking that path, when its actually making you walk around it)

idk if any of this yapping makes any sense this is very weird and esoteric. the magic in this world is very weird and esoteric. but essentially this is a kind of energy system that the tomtar pioneered into forms of tech...

[diegogtratty]

Been seeing a specific type of post popping up about this community more lately. Specifically, talking about how some things are overdone to death.

So I have to ask. Not why these things are overdone, no. But why some feel the need to ruin other people's parties, purely for sticking to what they like.

If the problem is that you hate that stuff, maybe consider, I dunno, letting them be? They make that stuff because they like it? Who would've thought?

If the problem is that they're not making stuff you like, recognize that people have different preferences, and consider making or commissioning it yourself?

I wholeheartedly mean that last point incredibly hard. Being in a niche community, with niche preferences, does make it plenty difficult to find stuff you'll enjoy, I get that all too well. But that doesn't mean I'll complain until stuff magically spawns upon my screen.

Often times for niche stuff, someone has to be the first person to make something happen, because otherwise, who knows if someone else will.

And not just making it once, no. Rather, make multiple things, big or small in scope. Write the concept or story down. Draw or edit it out briefly. Get the idea out there.

But above all, be persistent. Outlive. Survive. Just because it isn't popular on your first post, it doesn't mean that you should give up trying. Especially if it's something you're genuinely passionate about.

[ovokthen]

Megaman 9 yapping

The story of the 9th Rockman game was short and simple, but the idea behind it was always so peculiar to me. To recap, there is now a 4th law of robotic which gives them expiration date - this encourages scientists to create newer and more efficient model while saving energy and resources from maintaining old and outdated ones. However, it proves to be a problem because the robots in Rockman have "souls" akin to that of a human, which causes them to rebel and bring destruction humanity.

This is a story that touches on ethnics and certain area of philosophy, but particularly, I'm interested in how those elements affects the robots' psychology. In the game, after defeating 8 robot masters, you would get a cutscene showing how Wily manipulated them into joining his side and how he eventually reprogram them to be destructive. However, the robots still wanted to be of use to the humans until the end:

Dr. Wily: "Just because you reached some arbitrary expiration date doesn't mean you should be scrapped! You're all still quite useful! You have a right to live! I'm going to help you. Together we'll show the world how useful you all still can be!" Robot: "Hmm… perhaps you're right. We still want to be of use to people. Can you repair us?"

All in all, their usefulness dictates whether they deserved to live or not. Before I made this post, I thought Dr Wily was going to talk about how they shouldn't be scrapped because they have souls, but after rereading the script, I realized he just reverted back to talking about their usefulness. The robots don't seem to mind at all. It is as if they were programmed to think of way, or at least were conditioned to think that way due to their environment. If I, a human, were to be born along side my peers then before I even reach old age, I was suddenly told "The new is generation is better than you at art, so you need to be executed", then I would most likely lose all of my reasons and start going berserk as well. This is what happened in Hitoshi Ariga's manga: The 4th law get administered as usual, Dr Wily said the same thing, but he didn't reprogram them or manipulate them, he only offered to get rid of their expiration date. In the end, it was up to the robot themselves to decide whether they would revolt or not (and all of them did).

Hitoshi Ariga's interpretation is more believable than it is in the game, but it's hard for me to believe that all 100% of them would turn from obedient robots to war machines just like that. Once again, If I was suddenly told that my life was cut short because someone was better, I would be mad, but that is with the assumption that I am a human. The 9th numbers and robots, even though they have emotion and "souls" similar to that of a human, they are not human; It is similar to comparing the life of a dog and a cat. Of course, we haven't discovered any species that have a level of intelligence and emotional capability similar to human, so it is impossible to tell, but I think there would be a noticeable amount of conflict that comes from being a robot (a species that is meant to die and be improved upon) that has a human mind (a species that wants a fulfilling life).

Assuming there was a robot who wanted to live (as in Hitoshi Ariga's interpretation), but also believe that their life was taken for granted (as in the game version), there would a difficult character arc whether they were mind controlled by Dr Wily or not. Let's say it is Hitoshi Ariga's version where the robots act on their own, this character would follow the other 9th numbers in the revolution to get rid of the 4th law, but I doubt they would contribute that much because they feel indebted to the humans. They are incapable of helping those around them in the revolution, but at the same time they aren't willing to turn themselves in and end their life quickly. This also leads to another problem. Let's say they couldn't care less whether they die or not, but if they are close to the other 9th numbers, it would be a problem if they just gave in because that would mean their friend/sibling could potential die because of their listlessness. If there was a dilemma like that, it's either you lose yourself and join your siblings in exterminating human, or you run away from both the 9th numbers and the human and delay the inevitable.

[youremyheaven]

Omg rahu-ketu post😳

I was actually discussing my struggles around having prominent swati in my chart and staying grounded in my own reality on a forum fairly recently.

I have a very rich inner world which I essentially live in most of the time, and sometimes I feel like I miss out of my own life because I’m so detached. Limerence is also a big struggle for me, I find it much easier to centre myself in the energy of someone else than to be responsible for my own reality, which I guess comes from the things you talked about like rahu being a shadow planet and the mythology of rahu and obsession.

I also spend a large amount of time on social media and playing games 😶‍🌫️ I’ve tried to make uses of the positives by channeling my imagination into something tangible like art, but I have a hard time actually putting in the work to develop skills since I’m so distracted all the time. I think I’ve spent too much time in my head and now I’ve forgotten how to be in my body lol (my ADHD isn’t helping either💀)

Swati I think is especially a difficult nak because the libra/venus influence is only enabling rahu’s indulgence, unlike saturn or to a lesser extent mercury.

Aside from my personal whinings- the thing you said about occult/astro kind of intrigued me. All of my close family (incl. grandparents, uncles, etc) have atleast one rahu or ketu nak in their big 3, usually being ardra, mula or swati.

My mother’s side has lots of psychics and we have a dream interpretation system that gets passed down the family, whilst my father’s side has many tarot readers. My dad himself is an occultist who is interested in Thelema, astral projection, etc. There’s some interest in astrology on both sides but not particularly in depth and my parents usually end asking me about the transits. Oh yeah and I guess I had that one psychic dream last November that came true the morning after.

In general, my family has a history of very eccentric characters who occasionally got exiled or imprisoned or some crazy shit 😭 I feel like that’s just average Eastern European family lore though. Do you think such isolation is nodal? I think it is but there might be other planetary influence.

That’s enough yapping for today though. Interested to see your post on the positives❤️

Your observation about Swati is spot on

I do think Nodal influence+ well placed/strong Rahu & Ketu are necessary for learning and immersing yourself in the occult. Someone who cannot channel it well will remain ignorant of it no matter how much they read or study it. In some ways the Nodes can be understood as layers of the subconscious and the unconscious. The nodes represent karma (Ketu does) and our unconscious mind is our accumulated karma, if we remain ignorant of it, we will let it guide all our actions and lead us to self destruction. Therefore to have strong/well placed Nodes means you're aware of the different layers of your mind as a result of which you can understand the different layers of reality. Nodal influence creates a fog/veil that cannot be lifted until we gain true gnosis. This is why Nodal people get lost in addictive substances/pass times/people/ interests because their own reality feels foggy/veiled to them so they can only access it from other things. Obviously this is another form of Maya or illusion and that's why even these natives struggle with it. You hate the thing even as you indulge in it because on some level you realise that you're losing yourself to it.

Immersing yourself in the occult requires a certain discipline and consistency that can be hard for Nodal natives (malefic influenced, badly placed etc) to master unless it's well aspected but those who do master it are able to perceive reality and understand the esoteric realm in a truly sublime way. It's rare and magnetic.

I do think Nodal influence can contribute to being exiled/imprisoned/being isolated. There is a reason why 5/6 Nodal nakshatras all belong to the Shudra caste which is the lowest. These natives live lives that are "unusual" or different from the norm. They are "detached" because their life experiences already set them apart from others. They don't belong to the mainstream because they've been put in circumstances where they've been deprived of what is "normal".

Like I said in my post, what is "unusual" can vary a lot and can mean sooo many different things. Majority of the "child star gone wild" type celebrities have heavy Nodal influence. Why? because it's "unusual" for a child to be working or attaining fame and wealth or for their family to use them for the same. When you're deprived of anything ordinary or real, you depend on substances/unhealthy relationships/habits etc to feel centred. This is why after a point these stars "go rogue or wild". They amass a lot of wealth/fame but ultimately they're unable to benefit from it or enjoy it. This is also unusual as these are things typically understood as blessings. Being in a position where you can't connect to or relate to others is a very Nodal experience. That's why a lot of people with these placements are so introverted and withdrawn. If you're a famous child actor, you can't quite go to school and connect to the experiences of other people your age so you feel "isolated". Being imprisoned/exiled is another such experience. It permanently alters you and you don't know how to connect to others who haven't been through it.

I do think isolation is a big theme in the lives of Nodal people. It can be literal or emotional. But it's also obviously influenced by the rest of the chart. Heavy 12h placements also make a native experience the same themes to some extent.

[crushingcasanova]

Pros and Cons of being with me! >_<

Pros

Cute fashion sense

nerdy

can contribute in intellectual conversation

can act and do other performative arts

sweet lover + romantic at heart

will brag about you a lot

can write + somewhat paint, you will be a muse

Very devoted and loyal

silly and is on tumblr

can and will make you jewelry

loves to send physical love letters and such

likes to give gifts

can sing semi decently

knows a lot of fandoms and stuffs so common interests are likely

Loves to listen to yapping but can also yap

Also okay with just existing in the same space with no obligation for talking (parallel play)

good relationship with family + friends

can articulate emotions and thoughts and introspect

emotionally and self aware

sweet friend (according to sol)

very supportive and cares deeply about close people

Has a plan for the future + goals

Motivated academically

doesn't mind deep convos or revealing personal lore

Communicative + open about issues

Loves taking notes and learning about darlings, usually in a shrine format (which you can see)

Will allow you to make choices about outfits, what to do, daily life, etc and values your opinion a lot

Possessive but not overbearingly so

Can adapt to any and all love types

Ambiamorous + willing to let you explore other partners within reason / with boundaries

Cons

shy

chronically online

swaps from formal to cute to chill to low energy to high energy a lot

Not good at leading conversation

Recovering people pleaser but doing okay at it

Follower, not as much of a leader (unless out of necessity) 

Sometimes a bit reserved + closed off, would rather listen than overshare sometimes

Very careful about the perception of self in the eyes of others

Physically needs to know everything + every thought you have

Keeps busy a lot with games / painting / other media 

Spontaneous plans irl tend to spring out of nowhere

Keeps self small + is afraid in pressuring social settings if not irl

Not great at directly befriending people, awkward

Gets distracted easily

Indecisive at times

Can be clingy

Not great at comforting at all

Possible adhd / untested but def has some issues 

[amostimprobabledream]

This is going to sound kind of well-duh, but here it is...

So...I have a habit of occasionally hyperfixating on blogs I find, usually when I've found a new fandom and want to immerse myself in it. And then I get attached to it and I'll start sending anons sharing ideas and stuff, especially if the person running the blog seems chill and I lowkey want to be friends.

EXCEPT I'M KIND OF SHY SOMETIMES so I always do it with anon turned on. So that way it seems like it's a lot of different people and not just me bothering them over and over...

And it's so crazy because actually, there are a couple of blogs out there who have had thoughts/prompts/etc I sent in and made really awesome content - based off something I sent in! My friend will confirm this, I've literally sent her perhaps hundreds of asks, mostly anonymously, to her blog, but she knows it's me because she knows the way I type/phrase things too well.

So why don't I just write them myself?!

I guess it's lowkey me trying to contribute and if I'm new to the fandom, I don't always feel confident about taking on the ideas I come up with. But when it comes to writing short headcanons or whatever, I rarely do it because for some reason I got it into my head that people won't want to read something so short?

EVEN THOUGH I LOVE READING SHORT LITTLE PIECES IN RESPONSE TO MY PROMPTS.

So I guess from now on, when I have an idea, I should just write it myself instead of constantly outsourcing my ideas to other people because I think they'll do them better then me, and maybe that way more people will interact with me/my blog, which I'd very much like! I love yapping about fandoms with people (so long as they aren't being rude to me lol), and I have no idea why it's taken me this long to figure this out. My tumblr is like ten years old and I've been active on it since like 2017. I feel so stupid. I don't know why I decided the only way people would consume any content by me MUST be in a fully fleshed-out fanfic idea and not just a small post or drabble. I almost want to tag some of the people I've been sending anons to all this time and confessing that they were actually me, but some of the people I don't really talk to anymore (we didn't have a fight or anything, I just realised I was putting way more energy into the friendship than they were), or they don't know who I am and probably think I'm just an overeager weirdo (which I am, tbf) , or it's my friends who DO know it's me. Idk, maybe with some of them I should still be like, "Hey, remember X/Y/Z post? I'm the anon who sent that!" Like, this is YEARS worth of content in some cases. When I find a blog I like I stick to them unless they start posting/reblogging some shit I don't want to see.

So yeah, I guess this post is to say, from now on you can expect to see a lot more fandom-related content from me, but in a smaller scale instead of churning out fanfics every two months or so.

Thoughts? Opinions? I hope you guys reading this are excited about this extremely overdo moment of clarity!

[cingulata]

I have a silly headcanon that zoot is supposed to taking amphetamines (adhd meds that are specifically stimulants) to make him a bit less spacey and more involved in everyday life but he either forgot to take them/get them refilled, or made the decision that he preferred being off them! I do think he has a handful of reasons that contribute to his lackadaisical energy and general forgetfulness / lack of awareness and I think untreated conditions are for sure a part of that.

I think if anything, the mayhem are probably not a fan of the pharmaceutical industry (janice preferring non traditional medicine, floyd yapping about big pharma putting chips in people, teeth generally being weary of the practice, animal being.. animal and lips probably knowing a private practitioner he prefers going to) but if they did have random bottles of meds laying around for various ailments they experience, the pill bottle that at one point had zoots adhd stuff is just full of pocket lint and buttons or something LOL.

Thanks for sharing your hc!! I also like to think that there's a combination of factors for Zoot's, well, Zoot-ness (is it surrealism/magic? Drugs? Something neurodivergent or mental health related? All of the above?) and while I tend to leave it open-ended in my mind, this totally makes sense. And I love how you thought through all the different mindsets each band member would have. Thank you for the ask!!

[tjemegames]

HSR: 2.5.1 AS, 2.5.1 PF, & 2.5.2 MoC Recaps

Hello there, the time for yapping is here once again! Since only the same eight or so people tend to read these, I don't think we need a wall of disclaimers this time around. Going forward you should really only expect to see them when I’ve implemented formatting changes or have something important to mention that pertains to the entirety of the recap post.

2.4 turned me into a slightly casual gamer: dedicated subsections for my casual gaming activities have been added to minimize some of the reintroduction redundancy that was happening in the last recap.

As always, apologies for the image distortion: long photos and Tumblr do not mix well.

You know the drill, lengthy rambling about my endgame experience is under the cut!

2.5.1 Apocalyptic Shadow

Gamer's Instigation is probably my favorite endgame title out of all the ones we've had so far (let's go, gamers!) I'm a big fan of AS, as we know, and this cycle's challenge did not disappoint. I got my twelve stars within a total of four challenge waves!

I tried my hardest to avoid resetting in my first run of stage IV, but even after doing stage III and rereading the enemy details I still needed to feel out Phantylia's mechanics to get a better grasp on the best way to defeat her efficiently. Aventurine's battle was rather cut and dry, so his side only took one attempt.

Aventurines battle was also quite fun. Imagine if his normal boss mechanics allowed for a cumulative dice score across your teammates (the energy buff would probably have to be RNG-based or default to the teammate that contributed the most points in order to counterbalance that), but it would make for a much more enjoyable time when fighting him. It’s been months and I'm still salty about the White Night Chronicles MoC XII—there simply was no reason for that to have been as difficult as it was for me back then. I just…

Anyway, here are the builds I used for IV-I:

Phantylia's battle wasn’t hard, it just required a bit more focus and planning to complete. I did my run with a sustain because I misunderstood the HP situation for defeating the flowers; I interpreted it as the flowers would restore Phantylia’s HP after popping, rather than restoring my team’s HP. In hindsight I shouldn’t have understood it that way because that’s not how the flowers work in her Echo of War, but for some reason that didn’t click at the time. Either way, I got it done with relative ease which is all I’m really asking for these days.

These are the builds I used in IV-II:

Pretend you didn't see Aventurine's sphere—there simply was no better choice. It is what it is, and I will not be addressing it further.

The first 800 jades down (whoop whoop!) I desperately needed them because Feixiao bankrupted me on her way to my roster. It’s my penance for betraying Danny boy.

AS Casual Gaming

AS is way too fun for me not to drop back into it over the course of the patch. I tend to get inspired by runs that I’ve seen on Discord and end up motivated enough to try for better clears and/or test out different teams. This is where I’ll be dropping my ramblings about those attempts. Unfortunately, due to image limitations, I won’t be able to include any build showcases in this section. I did consider making a secondary post specifically for this reason but ultimately decided that it wasn’t a big enough deal to be necessary (if I’m wrong about that, please do let me know. I’m down to yap for as long as y’all are down to listen.)

Chasing a better clear with my original team lineup:

Popped back into the game about four hours after my first round of attempts to start the process of trying for a better clear. The last time I was score chasing in AS I kept a close track of my reset count since it was over the course of a few days, and I kept switching back and forth between my phone and pc. This time I stuck to one day and one device so the detailing is a bit less extensive.

Even though I’ve used DHIL in basically every endgame cycle, I still manage to fumble his gameplay from time to time, my first round of tries being a prime example of that. With that in mind, I figured that taking on Phantylia’s side would be my best shot at increasing my overall score. I set my sights on a 100 point increase and went to town.

First three resets: +66 points, bringing me up to 7260

Next two resets: +4 more points, bringing me up to 7264

Final five resets: no points, DHIL managed to die twice—don’t ask me how that happened because I genuinely do not know

70 points of improvement on the second side. I don’t know if 100 overall points is within reach, but I’ll refocus my efforts on Aventurine’s battle and see what, if anything, can be done there.

First and only three resets: no points, I was hoping that there was a work around with the weakness-locked dice but there wasn’t

Barring making my entire team even faster to get more turns, which I don’t have the relics to do at the moment, this appears to be the end of the line for this clear.

Not a bad set of attempts overall. I was able to get my score up to a grand total of 7264 points within thirteen resets. That’s 138 more points than last AS—didn’t see that happening if I’m being completely honest, some of my builds have actually gotten worse since then. Either way, I’m happy enough with this score to forgo attempting a sustainless clear. Let’s be so for real, my account is not currently in the place to even humor sustainless clears. I’ll file that thought away for later down the line.

Getting Jingliu's Revenge:

Remember a little earlier when I said I was still salty about my experience with White Night Chronicles? Well, since I wasn't having the best of days, I decided to head back into AS so I could feel vindication in the form of beating up Aventurine.

Now, you may be thinking, "TJ, you've already gotten your revenge on Aventurine with Boothill like three times since then." To which I would say yes. However, pew-pew gaming him to death just isn't enough to quell the insatiable beast that is my pettiness for this situation. That being said, I called upon my slightly benched, 35% crit rate having Jingliu to finally enact my revenge; the fact that it's been over five months and I still haven't been able to get Jingliu to 50% crate is actually so painful. I had a whole arc where I was farming wind set Pela and did not manage to get a single replacement piece for Jingliu that entire time. I hate that I love this game.

Anyway, back to the topic at hand. I regeared Jingliu, rallied the troops (Bronya, RM, & Natasha), and set out for battle:

Victory is MINE! 3608 points is pretty damn solid—my Boothill team only managed to get 73 more points during their run. I feel like I can finally move on from this without any lingering resentment or regrets (yippee!)

Closing Thoughts

That just about wraps up AS for this patch. I was wrong with my guess of having to beat up Yanqing this cycle (a well-deserved break after the 2.5 continuance) but I do hope to see him in this mode sometime in the future. I’m looking forward to seeing what all they manage to incorporate into AS after this patch because the new boss mechanics were both refreshing and interesting. I’m someone who actively likes this mode, so I can only imagine how much of an impact the new features had on those who don’t typically care for it. I hope that they continue to mix up more battles like this in the future.

2.5.1 Pure Fiction

No video for Volubility since I couldn't get past eleven stars: I recorded one but it's not worth posting since I didn't even come close to a full clear. I don't want to waste my time editing and making a thumbnail for content I'm not proud of. Additionally, since I wasn't able to finish and I've since done MoC in between my myriad of PF attempts, I lost the ability to save my build showcases for the aforementioned recording, meaning that I would've been missing an entire section of my video. Truly unfortunate, but it is what it is.

I genuinely had such a bad time trying to do this. I spent far more time than I would've liked trying to twelve star and it sucked just about every bit of enjoyment that it could've out of me. I thought I would have a better chance at beating it after a couple weeks away and doing some character upgrades but apparently it just wasn't in the cards this patch. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Closing Thoughts

720/800 jades is painful but I have no choice other than to accept it and move on. If I somehow manage a miracle before the 2.6.1 reset, I'll be sure to pop in here to provide an update. Otherwise, that's all from me on PF.

2.5.2 Memory of Chaos

No video for Scalegorge Tidalflow either. I did manage to get all twelve stars, but my mental health is currently kicking my ass, so I just don't have it in me to bother with it (or this post really) before the patch ends.

Quick summary off the dome since I didn't write any notes when I did my run; Boothill continues to pay his dues. Feixiao is fun to play with—I might need to pull Robin or build Moze though because I don’t have a proper third slot for her team. I thought I could clear floor XII quicker than seven cycles, but a few rounds of casual gaming did not yield better results. No showcases because I forgot to make them before giving PF another try and I'm drained.

Closing Thoughts

MoC was fine. The exo-toughness mechanic is interesting, and I hope I get a chance to explore it more when I'm feeling better. All 800 jades have been added to the savings for DHIL's cone.

Alrighty friends, that's it for this post. Sorry about the quality drop; my brain is being a nuisance and I'd prefer to put this out now while I have some motivation left to do it—there’s no guarantee that I would've finished it at all if I decided to delay it further. Not my best yap but it’ll do for archiving purposes.

I hope everyone enjoyed the 2.5 endgame cycle (to the best of their ability)! I'll be back in about six weeks when it's time for the next one of these.

[yennas-stuff]

The fandom is so lucky to have you! We appreciate having you here and all that you contribute to it ❤️❤️

1. What brought you into the fandom?

2. What character(s) do you feel the most connected to and why?

3. Out of all of SJM’s books, which one means the most to you and why?

4. Out of all of the SJM couples (fanon, canon, endgame, etc) which one means the most to you and why?

Keep doing you ❤️

Hi anon!

Thank you, that's so sweet to hear, especially considering most that I do here is post silliness.

1) I got the first acotar book for my birthday from @froggywizzard . So yall can blame her, lol. As soon as I finished the series, I created this account to see more theories and fanarts. I came here because it was difficult to find other eluciens/gwynriels on tiktok.

I also have this overwhelming need to yap about my fixations, and I didn't want to torture people in my real life. I can be a bit annoying once I get obsessed with a topic, lol.

2) Surprisingly or not, it would probably be Elain. I know we don't know much about her personality and thoughts as of now, but from what we know... she's just like me fr. As a people pleaser, someone who has a hard time taking the reins in my own life sometimes, as someone who likes living their simple life, and who always tries to see the positive in every situation... At the same time, I hate when someone takes away my choice and freedom. So, yeah, Elain is my girl.

3) Probably acosf. I haven't read tog or cc yet buuuut, acosf was probably the only acotar book that made me cry multiple times. The Valkyries made this book for me.

4) Elucien!!!! I just love Lucien as an mmc so much. I love their aesthetic, energy, compatibility, and potential for their story. The angst and slowburn is going to be crazy.

And Gwynriel ofc. The healing arc is going to be so good.

I also love the possibility of any gay Eris ship. Azris, Eris x Balthazar. I just can't see Eris as a straight man.

I also love Tamsand, lol. For the drama of it all.

Thank you, Anon! You are a cutie patootie for sending such a nice ask!

[bigsoftmarshmallow]

Now Im just thinking about yapper lover talking nonstop about stuff that interest them- that paired with the Ganondorfs and Demise would be interesting-

Ganondorf would have no idea what was going on, but his love is passionate about it, so he will listen and ask questions when necessary. Demise, in all honesty, does not give a singular fuck and just pretends to listen and occasionally does fully listen, which, is better than any other alternative.

I yap when I get overexcited about things. I can ramble on and on about my favorites if the mood hits me. I'll admit, I dont yap much anymore, due to the experiences of those not listening and my work being just talking all day.

************************************************************************

Wind Waker Ganondorf

Reaction: Wind Waker Ganondorf would find a yapper lover endearing. He would genuinely listen, appreciating the passion his lover shows in their interests. He might not always understand the fascination but would respect it.

Internal Monologue: "She speaks with such enthusiasm. It's... refreshing. Though I don't always grasp her interest, I enjoy hearing her speak."

Response: He would occasionally nod, give thoughtful responses, and ask questions to show he is engaged. He might offer insights or anecdotes from his own experiences, adding to the conversation.

Example: When she talks about her latest hobby, he might say, "Your dedication reminds me of my own pursuits. Tell me more about what drives your interest."

Ocarina of Time Ganondorf

Reaction: Ocarina of Time Ganondorf would be a patient listener, finding a yapper lover's enthusiasm intriguing. He would listen attentively, seeing it as a way to understand her better.

Internal Monologue: "Her excitement is palpable. There's much to learn from her passion."

Response: He would actively contribute to the conversation, asking probing questions and offering his own thoughts. He might challenge her ideas to provoke deeper discussion, enjoying the intellectual engagement.

Example: When she shares her thoughts on a new book she's reading, he might respond, "And what do you think the author is truly trying to convey? Have you considered the underlying themes?"

Twilight Princess Ganondorf

Reaction: Twilight Princess Ganondorf would initially be taken aback by a yapper lover but would soon find it charming. He would listen with a mix of amusement and genuine interest.

Internal Monologue: "She never stops talking... But there's something captivating about her energy."

Response: He would listen quietly, occasionally contributing with short but meaningful comments. He would enjoy watching her animated expressions and the way she lights up when talking about her interests.

Example: When she excitedly talks about her day, he might say, "Your enthusiasm is contagious. It sounds like you had quite an eventful day."

Hyrule Warriors Ganondorf

Reaction: Hyrule Warriors Ganondorf would appreciate a yapper lover's passion and energy. He would listen with a smile, finding her constant chatter entertaining.

Internal Monologue: "She talks so much... But I enjoy her spirit."

Response: He would actively engage in the conversation, offering supportive and encouraging comments. He would enjoy teasing her lightly about her endless talking but in a loving manner.

Example: When she talks about a new project she's excited about, he might say, "You have so much energy for this. Tell me more about how you plan to accomplish it."

Tears of the Kingdom Ganondorf

Reaction: Tears of the Kingdom Ganondorf would be both amused and fascinated by a yapper lover. He would listen attentively, appreciating the insight into her thoughts and feelings.

Internal Monologue: "She has so much to say... It's intriguing to see what captivates her."

Response: He would listen actively, contributing thoughtful comments and questions. He would enjoy the lively conversation and the connection it fosters between them.

Example: When she talks about her favorite topic, he might respond, "You speak of it with such passion. It's clear it means a great deal to you. What inspired this interest?"

Demise (Skyward Sword)

Reaction: Demise would initially be perplexed by a yapper lover but would come to appreciate her enthusiasm. He would listen with a mix of curiosity and amusement.

Internal Monologue: "She talks endlessly... But her passion is undeniable."

Response: He would listen more than he talks, occasionally interjecting with questions or comments. He would find her energy infectious and enjoy the liveliness she brings to their interactions.

Example: When she excitedly describes her latest adventure, he might say, "You seem to have a knack for finding excitement. What drives you to seek out these experiences?"

Overall, the Ganondorfs and Demise each have their unique ways of reacting to a yapper lover. They all find her enthusiasm charming and endearing, each engaging in conversation in their own way, whether through active listening, thoughtful contributions, or playful teasing. This dynamic adds a lively and engaging element to their relationships, deepening their connection and understanding of each other.

[gontagokuhara]

OKAY I FORGOR💀 TO MENTION THIS actually idk if I already said this but I LOVE the way you write kokichi? Like kokichi's jesterism clowncore energy is not talked about enough in this fandom, he's not just a lying troll, he can also be a corny little canned-bit filled jokester! He can be your angle! Or yuor devil! But he and Kaede give off such an "annoying little brother"/"exhausted oldest sister" vibe in pointy objects it never fails to make me laugh and also feel feelings!

Also ngl writing my lil (literally >2k) review gave me the energy to do my writing assignment so thank you for indirectly but also directly contributing to me not failing my class LMFAO

hi hello!! first of all thank u again for ur very sweet comments i keep rereading them . actively working on the next chapter and i reread them like an hour ago <3 also you are so me re: the writing thing literally i am writing this long ass response out as a warm up to getting started on the chapter again I SEE U. solidarity u got this class

as always below the cut because i like to yap (no spoilers butttttttt call it a small hint of what's to come next chapter)

ANYWAY !!! im glad people like that choice <3 his general silliness tends to get lost in canon in the midst of such a heavy fraught situation (where his dumbass is instigating fights constantly......) and so i feel it more natural to have it bleed into him in pointy objects you know? his backpack also offers just unreal opportunities for clownery and i can't help myself. i have issues with a lot of canon/fanon portrayals of kokichi so with him (as i do miu, and kiyo, and kaito, etc) i like to do the classic mogul move yoink & twist. i take character that needs fixer-uppering, mash 'em around like playdoh, and make them mostly the same but......better in my humble opinion. i feel like i do that pretty well with kokichi, and hearing those choices are appreciated makes me very happy <3

in that vein the kaede/kokichi dynamic is SOOOO important its one of my favorites ive worked into pointy objects i think. justice for my real protag kaede BUT her biting the dust so early both robbed canon content of what a friendship between them could look like. but it also gives me LOTS of room to pick up their barbie dolls and make them have good moments together. speaking of pointy objects canon, they arrived at camp within about a year of each other, before a lot of the other mainstay demigods began living there full time. gonta, miu, kaede, maki, and kokichi spent a lot of time as the only ones at camp; kids like kirumi/tenko/himiko/angie/kiyo are all summer-only, and full-timers ryoma, kaito, and kiibo came later (ages 14, 16, and within a few months of sonia giving them a soul [roughly the same stretch of time as ryoma's arrival], respectively).

all that lore TO say: kaede and kokichi grew up together in a lot of really important ways, and the dynamic that developed over the years very much is that exhausted older sister/exhausting little brother who are fiercely and kind of unexpectedly protective over one another. i could go on about all of the early full-time campers' dynamics because there's a lot within those five especially that i've like. developed in my brain? but havent fit into the 170k words 💀 the mind palace of spiderwebbing character relationships is very vast for how much has actually made it into the fic.....but wink wonk we WILL see a taste of it this next chapter

and finally, re edits: i did my one BIG edit fest back in may, and since then there haven't been any major changes. that said, i do reread the prior chapters quite often (checking details to make sure new writing doesn't have any discrepancies, getting myself back in the headspace to write shuuichi's voice, etc) and do occasionally find typos or phrasing or sentence flow i like changed, so i do fix those as i see them. that said, i DO know what you're talking about with chapter 3; that was a chapter i did pretty majorly redo in may, and there was definitely some redundant word use and odd sentence structure i went back and corrected. but i haven't made any changes that drastically alter the contents of the story; not more so than i did back in may, at least!

ok this as always got very long but it was as always very fun to answer!!!! thank you again for all your support MWAH MWAH and im sure we'll make contact again soon enough!!

[im-probably-crying-rn-ngl]

Hiiiiii. I have a question. Do you ship George with anyone else other than Max and Alex?

hii anon!! sorry but this is kind of a long post since i have been on a social media hiatus (mutuals, i am going to spend the next 2 days spamming the shit out of your posts, that's a threat AND a promise) and feel like yapping.

first off we have sir lewis hamilton himself. okay so britcedes were my first f1 ship, i am a mercedes fan first, after all. i believe they fulfil a very specific niche in the f1 rpf eco system. their relationship is extremely unique in my opinion.

the age difference, the hero worship, the fact that in terms of career lewis has lived whole lives and more before george and george has so much time ahead of him to live without lewis. it's so sad and beautiful.

britcedes content creators are amazing which def contributed to the brain rot. like gax enjoyers (apparently there are more of us now?? omg so much to catch up on), they are so skilled and work well with whatever crumbs the merc admin, lewis and george toss us. ig i have also been inspired and have a few britcedes wips.

then there is fernando alonso, intially i didn't really get it. i saw glimpses here and there during the 2023 season, of course the new years eve celebrations yeah. but the recent video of them on the private jet?? excuse me?? i am trying to feel normal about it but i can't and i won't. they looked so giddy, pretty and evil and i can't help but say 'he fucked that old man' (alleged). also it gives sugar daddy energy even if the sugar baby is a millionaire himself, hilarious.

of course daniel ricciardo, who is mine and george's favourite guy. george himself ships them together so...like what do you mean he just wears danny's merch when he's going to his parent's house or a merc party?? the most recent danorge fic on ao3 is brilliant btw, read it this morning and it was just perfect characterisation all around (is the author on tumblr?)

um toto wolff, oh no who said that? look it's just a slight fascination rather than actual interest. wait please-

special mention to lando norris (even if i am a landoscar merchant since the beginning) because it would be funny.

i think gax and galex are probs my main george ships tho.

[ruleofheart]

HAIIIEE same anon here who said i love the way u write ellie n her persona,, i’m gonna leave a tag so you know

‘i cling to aus cuz i neeeed to see and write her as a girl just navigating life/crushes/young adulthood being a total dweeb and soooo unbelievably easy to talk to. like. she, in my eyes, is the definition of friend crush turned into crush crush!!!’ i couldn’t agree more like (yap sesh my bad) ellie is genuinely so complex and we can see the way the energy inside her nearly withers throughout the game. like yes , as she grows from a teenager into an adult she will change and she will have hardened more, grown out of that ‘childlike wonder’ or the same excitement one would have in their adolescence but that, alone, isn’t the primary factor contributing to why she changed and how much so. it was everything she’d been through, that trauma and all the loss she’s suffered has ‘drained’ or ‘worn out’ the life out of her. tlou2 is a journey through grief, we never get to see ellie live life as an adult without it, all we have of her authenticity or her most natural, undisturbed element, is when she was 14-17.

grief and revenge completely alter someone’s brain and persona, they’ll mechanise differently. ellie is still herself, but because of the emotional hits she took, a part of her died and remained dead throughout the game, so we can’t see HER, we just see her process of grief. she went on a spree and we can see she wasn’t herself due to her impulsivity, lack of feeling of control, depression, etcetera.

people regain themselves through recovery and we don't see ellie recover, the game ended at her acceptance

so, that being said, i do feel like because trauma and grief overshadowed ellie's personality through adulthood. people took her struggling character and assigned it to her core as her being ‘dominant, cold, authoritative’, because she acts in a kindred way during her journey of revenge, and we don’t see much of the ‘old ellie’ shine through. grief and anger eliminated her softer aspects, and therefore when she’s written in fics and all, they mischaracterise her :((((. but grief is a process !!! a process that ends , and it will inevitably change someone , but she’s still herself at the end of the day !!!!

ellie is still very much so that soft, sweet, sassy, funny, sarcastic, stubborn, dorky and goofy girl we all know n love!!!! just very wounded so we don’t see it as much !!!

so in AUs where joel is alive and ellie isn’t living that same, horrible, post-apocalyptic life, i realllyyyyy wanna see her being HERSELFFFF,,, not all rough and hard and daddy dom etc stawwwwp shes so sweeeeet… i neeeed to see her happy and dorky and i neeeed to see her living a normal life and get that fluff and stuff like she is SSSOOO classroom crush . she is ssooo ‘that pretty girl that sits across from you’ !! shes so friend crush, best friend, etc,,,, like Yes she’s gonna be more mature, reclusive, seductive even, dom whatever, cuz she’s grown, but people take that and run too far with it sometimes @_@ i just wanna see my girl happy and living how she would without all the stress and pain. shes strong and tough but also a little nerd

thats why i LOOOVEOEO your fic so much cuz we can still see her personality morphing as she grows, but she still has that essence that is just sssoo ‘her’

my thoughts were soo disorganised writing tjis but YOU GET WHAT I MEEEAAANNNNN (i hope)

- 🪷

SORRY. adding a read more, had to let this just sit with me

anyway. totally agree about the dom thing. its ok if u wanna envision ellie as a dom/top/whatever but. ugh. so many thoughts here but... masculinity =/= dark daddy dom who is void of emotion. Dont even get me started bru....

but yes my little lotus flower i get what you mean ;*

[artistgem]

Love

Soft old queer pandas

1,760 words.

Cho was somewhat glad to be back in the temperate climate of the Jade Forest. Standing around in the heat whilst covered in fur – even with finer, loose fur adapted to handle humid temperatures – was not the definition of ideal, especially when it hit noon and yet Cho could not find it within himself to complain about it in the slightest. He was enjoying himself greatly. How could he not? He was given a free pass to yap his head off about history to willing ears who wanted to listen and learn and who participated with full gusto.

Seeing the enthusiasm of the crowd. The active listeners and the people who asked questions and contributed to discussions and asked to know more was truly what Cho loved about being a Lorewalker.

Teaching the people, both old and young, would always feel his heart with joy and warmth. It truly felt good to be useful.

He found himself excited for the next day, it was almost impossible for him to calm himself as he went about his nighttime routine. He had returned to his home in Pandaria for the evening and currently sat at his vanity dresser, a cup of soothing tea off to the side as he applied hair curlers carefully. A large grin on his face to match the giddy energy that he knew was radiating off him.

In spite of being off in his own world, his ear twitched at the sound of rustling by the open door to the bedroom. Looking in the mirror it showed no one behind him. With a hum, Cho applied another roller to his hair.

“How was your day, darling?”

There was a notable pause. Cho continued to hum and prepare himself for bed.

“It was…well”.

“Oh? Just ‘well’?” Cho further inquired as Taran properly appeared in the mirror. Standing over him with a huff. “You know you cannot sneak up on me anymore, Taran. I have learnt all your ways by now”.

“How did you know it was me? What if it was a home intruder”.

Cho took a bottle of hairspray and applied a bit to the curls, Taran sneezed and coughed. “Because I would find it really interesting if a home intruder smelt like you for some reason”.

Setting the can down, Cho quickly took a sip of his tea before grabbing a cleansing tissue and wiping at his eyes.

“Face it, Teddy Bear. You cannot surprise me anymore”.

“Hmpth”. Taran tapped one of the rollers in Cho’s hair, to which Cho batted at his finger gently. “I will need to change my tactics”.

Cho smiled with a soft chuckle, fully turning around in his chair to acknowledge his husband. “Good luck on th-“.

He gasped as Taran surged forward and captured his lips in a full kiss. The moment of shock passed and he melted against Taran instantly with a sigh. Wrapping his arms around Taran’s shoulders, a large paw came up to cup his fluffy cheek to which he leaned into gleefully. Taran was the one to pull away, with the smuggest grin Cho had ever seen, and Cho did not need to look in the mirror to see the red spreading across his cheeks under the white of his fur.

“Okay-…okay you got me there”.

Taran wagged his eyebrows. “It seems that old dogs can learn new tricks”.

Cho scoffed and rolled his eyes dramatically, chirping in surprise when Taran pressed a fast kiss to the side of his neck, cornering him in the chair.

“So, how was your day?” Taran had the nerve to ask innocently.

Cho grinned and softly punched Taran in the shoulder.

“If you give me some space, I will tell you”.

“Aw but I’ve missed you all day!”

“You are a grown man, Taran! You- TARAN!”

Cho shrieked as he was hauled over Taran’s shoulder. He barked out a laugh and slapped Taran’s back over and over to no avail. “Put me down you brute!”

“How was your day?”

“It was good! It was amazing, put me down!”

“Did you miss me?”

“Of course I did, you big goof! Put me down!”

“How much do you love me?”

“Taran!” Cho could feel the tears of mirth prickling at his eyes. He kicked his legs half-heartedly only for Taran to easily wrap an arm around them, pinning them down. “A lot, I love you a lot! Please put me down!”

There was a low, drawn-out sigh. “As you wish”.

With a gasp, Cho was tossed onto the bed and laughed harder as he bounced briefly on the soft mattress. Scootching away from his husband with a mock glare. “You are out of control tonight!”

Grinning, Taran followed him onto the bed. “I am just a simple man, happy to see his lovely, gorgeous husband after a long, hard day, can you blame me for that?”

Cho pursed his lips and continued to level Taran with a glare, to which Taran did not flinch against and instead merely smirked and wagged his eyebrows once more. With such a stupid face, Cho could not hold the charade much longer and grabbed Taran by the chin, pressing a kiss of his own to his lips. Preening internally at the happy chuff he heard.

Even as he pulled back, Taran followed him and nuzzled his snout against his fuzzy cheek. Chuffing more.

“In all seriousness, how was your day? Are they treating you well at the event?”

Cho smiled softly. “Of course they are. Everyone has been delightful and respectful, so you do not need to fret about any threats to my dignity”.

There was a huff.

“Good, I would be having words with the event coordinators if anyone was treating you poorly”.

“No you will not because your idea of ‘having words’ is intimidating people”.

“No I do not”.

“Teddy Bear you do anyways I have greatly enjoyed seeing all the enthusiasm towards my stories and seeing all the benches fill out within the minute that some have started sitting in the sand, honestly I might ask for more benches because surely that cannot be comfortable. Cho clapped his paws together. “Everyone is so responsive and their excitement is infectious! Oh how I love my job sometimes”.

Taran flopped down. Resting his head in Cho’s lap. “And how are you handling the desert? Are you drinking enough water and resting enough?”

“Yes darling, I am. I am taking my breaks to rest in the shade and if I feel like something is wrong, the medics are not to far nor the frost mages”. Cho shrugged with a smirk of his own. “Besides, your Shado-pan would not let anything bad happen to me, I could turn around for a second only to turn back around to find that my water pouch has been refilled with freezing cold water”.

 He looked down pointedly at Taran who flushed at the accusation.

“They are…acting on their own accord. They…You do know how adored you are amongst the ranks, it’s how they show they care”.

“Of course”.

“I love you”.

“I love you too, Teddy Bear…You know, you should come by sometime. I am sure a lot of the champions and celebrators would love to see you well and getting some much-needed relaxation”.

Taran frowned. “Pandaria needs me, I cannot abandon my post here”.

“You could always take at least one day off and have either Yalia, Wan or Nurong cover you”.

“Besides…I would not last a second in Tanaris, I would need a frost mage by my side constantly which would just be a hassle”.

Cho pouted. “You can just say you do not want to spend time with me”.

“Well hang on now that is not what I am saying”.

He was quickly silenced by a quick kiss from Cho, who chuckled and shook his head.

“It’s alright, Taran. I know you do not like large events like this. I will not force you to do something you are uncomfortable with”.

Seeing Taran relax visibly signalled to Cho he had hit the nail on the head. He ran a paw through Taran’s tuft of hair soothingly, gently scratching his scalp with short, blunt claws. Taran purring at the attention.

“For you…” Taran reached up and held his paw. “I would do it for you…maybe just pop in every now and again to check in…maybe stay a bit to listen to one of your stories”.

“That would mean a lot to me, Taran but don’t feel like you have to for my sake”.

“Nono, I want to do this and besides, when was the last time we had a date?”

“Last week but that was besides the point I am guessing- Oh! I saw Taoshi on a date with her little girlfriend, Miss Sungwu. It seems she finally got Taoshi to relax”.

Taran grinned and chuckled to himself. “Atta girl”.

Smiling along, Cho stifled back a yawn. He wordlessly nudged Taran up and shuffled around on the bed. “Well, I do not know about you but I am exhausted and I want to set up my area early before the heat sets in tomorrow. You know, make me useful and all”.

“Cho-“

“I am joking, Taran”, Cho calmly tutted as he settled beneath the covers.

It did little to comfort Taran, who levelled Cho with a concerned frown. “I do not like it when you talk about yourself in that way even if you are joking…you are useful, you are important”. He shucked his shirt off before following Cho under the covers.

He leaned down and pressed a soft kiss to the bridge of Cho’s nose.

Settling down, Cho smiled tiredly up at his husband. Cupping his furry cheek and tracing his eye markings with his thumb. “I know, Teddy Bear…you remind me just about every day”.

“Well if you still think of yourself like this I need to say it more to you”.

“How about we go to bed instead?”

“Starting tomorrow then”.

Taran settled down on top of him to which Cho snorted in amusement. He flopped around to rest on his front, allowing Taran to drape an arm around his waist and rested his head on the countless pillows (and Taran’s beefy arm) they had. Any underlying tension in his body melting away instantly by the welcome, familiar presence of his husband behind him. Practically a living weighted blanket.

He shuttered his eyes and sighed, exhaling out the rest of his tension and drifting off into a peaceful rest as his mind quieted down at last.

[saintgeniushero]

I am sick and tired of my husband. And it is pretty obvious he feels the same, but he always hides behind the "I'm autistic" thing, and I tell him "well then, in that case, all I need you to do is to learn/remember this one thing..." and he always says, often laughing, "I can't!". He plays dumb, and he knows it. He thinks it's cute or something. Maybe it's a defense mechanism. Maybe it's laziness to avoid putting in work into improving himself as a person or improving the relationship, but whatever it is, it goes too far. His words and his supposed feelings don't match his actions. Due to the American immigration system, I can't divorce him (an idea I've never thought seriously about because of my beliefs in the concept of marriage, but which he has thrown around before) without jeopardizing everything that I worked all my life to achieve, not to mention defeating the point of marriage. I would have stayed on the fucking work visa, which I EARNED with my literal blood (from my hands, from work) and sweat, instead of switching over to the green card, but obviously one doesn't get married planning that the marriage will end up wrong. I did the common sense thing: A green card guaranteed that I would stay with my love, but it's conditional for 2 years because despite proving to the government that our love was sincere, we still have to prove it again at the end of those 2 years; that the marriage wasn't a sham. And it wasn't. It's not. But it has deteriorated. It's a bad marriage, but it's a real marriage. Here we are still trying to love each other. Today was his birthday and I celebrated it big time. I work as a barista making $16/hr (he gets a salary x3 that, but has thousands of dollars in debt that affect my previously Excellent credit score) but I still said yes to his every whim and spent $250 in gifts, food, cake, etc. I wanted to make the day perfect but he liked nothing, though he said he saw I was trying and appreciated it. We had sex. The marriage is terrible but it's salvageable, but only if he tries! He is not trying. I am. I really am. I'm a barista and not an engineer because I got married to him and got locked out of the job market for 2 years, but instead of looking for a job in my field 24/7, I work 50 hrs a week to contribute to rent and look for jobs instead of resting in my free time. He will say he is trying but I know it's his ego speaking. He would rather distract himself with familiar activities than try new solutions to our usual problems. I don't know how to help him. He has usurped the apartment with his mess and noise. I'm losing it. I need therapy. I've lost focus and intellectual energy, but I am still an extremely motivated hard worker. I just need physical space and silence (or background noise that isn't YouTube videos of dumb people yapping about some nonsense). A STEM job would give me those two things, but my husband demands without helping. I say what I need and I'm told I put up excuses. Where am I supposed to use my laptop? On the floor??? It's not an excuse if your mess taking up all the physical space in the apartment is a real problem! It's 11:16PM right, where am I supposed to go to do work? To a bar? To the stairs in our apartment? In the toilet with my laptop on my lap? My life is like that "Pursuit of Happiness" movie, but I still haven't reached Happiness.

[maplegyu]

SADDLE UP FOLKS!!! MAPLE IS GONNA DO WHAT SHE DOES BEST: YAP

let me start by saying... kae is the sweetest letting me yap about my fiyero!mingyu agenda and just how much i loved the wicked movie... but kae is also superhuman???? LIKE HOW DID YOU COME UP WITH RIGHT AWAY UR ACTUALLY MAGIC!!!!

ALSO THIS DEDICATION WHAT IF #MAPLECRIES!!!!!!

okay (lmm voice in non-stop) LET'S GO!

disclaimer: these were all immediate reactions i copy-pasted from my notes app HAHAHAHA

🪄

FIRST OFF LISTENING TO THEE SONG WHILE READING!!!! WHAT IS THIS FEELING IS MY ULT ENEMIES TO LOVERS SONG!!!

Ok so right off the bat!!!!!!

I LAUGHED SO HARD ALREADY GOD I LOVE MINGYU HIMBO MOMENTS

This convo gOD!! this is peak!!!!!!!!!!!!! Fiyero energy 😭 this was both so funny and what is this feeling (pun intended) bUTTERFLIES???? gOD kicking my feet and squealing at the flirty banter

You shoot him a glare. He flashes you a winning smile.

SO BANE OF MY EXISTENCE CODED ughhh ik this is bridgerton but this is the jbailey cinematic universe and we're all just living in it

His hand darts out until his fingers are wrapped around your wrist. Not to bruise or control, just to draw your attention to all your exaggerated movements.

OH U BET THE SPARKS WENT OFF FOR ME

"You still can't cast a half-decent Alarte Ascendare charm—"

"And your voice cracks whenever you try to hit the high note in Dear Old Shiz—"

THE HP SHOUT OUT 😂 NOT MINGYU COMING FOR THE VOCALS 😭😂

You loathe Mingyu, and Mingyu loathes you.

OR DO YOU????

As you pull the plug on your short-lived brainstorming session, marching off towards your dormitory with a dramatic flourish, Mingyu can't help but revel in the feeling. He feels like he just ran a damn marathon, all from spending twenty minutes of bickering with you.

Odd as it may seem, Mingyu has never felt so alive.

THIS IS AS MR. DARCY/ANTHONY BRIDGERTON AS IT GETS

KAE I HOPE U NEVER GET TIRED OF ME SAYING I LOVE U MOST ARDENTLY!!! COS HOLY SHIT THIS PART IS WHERE I AM BEWITCHED BODY AND SOUL!!!!!!!!!! (i'll never stop quoting these when appropriate)

okay but me as reader: *saves all his pics*

UM ALSO THE "ITS ONLY HALFTIME" PLS TELL ME THAT WAS A HADES REFERENCE

“It was your idea,” you point out. “So you start us off.”

Ah. Mingyu knows you’ll tear him a new one if he tells you the truth, which is that he didn’t really think he’d get this far.

He was fully prepared for the two of you to disagree until the deadline, or to perhaps start groveling at Madame Morrible’s feet for a new partner.

With this half-baked idea, though, the two of you are more likely to have to see this affair to completion.

“Right.” Mingyu squares his shoulders, eyeing the flowers atop the table. “I suppose we could, er, start with some basic curses.”

There’s a Cheshire cat-like grin on your face that Mingyu doesn’t like one bit. He steels himself for the blow, which inevitably lands in you saying, “You have no idea what we’re supposed to do.”

JUST SOMETHING ABOUT THIS WHOLE SCENE WAS SO YUMMY TO READ???? IDK IF ITS WEIRD TO DESCRIBE IT THAT WAY???? BUT IT WAS SO SATISFYING FOR ME FOR BOTH PARTIES!!!!

"Blah, blah, blah,” you drawl. “Ethics, insight, got it. But application? What about that, Kim?”

Mingyu has to bite back a curse from slipping past his lips. You’re so infuriating. He wants to wipe that smug look off of your face, though he isn’t exactly sure how he might go about that just yet.

“Maybe you want to contribute something,” he grumbles, his lower lip jutting out in an almost-pout. “I already came up with the idea of the project, sweets.”

CAN YALL KISS ALREADY DAMN!!!!!!!!!

There's nothing Mingyu hates more, really, than the reminder of just how good you are. The two of you were academic monsters to begin with, though you had your respective strengths and weaknesses. Mingyu excelled in theories; you dominated practice.

— but Mingyu is only half-listening.

I loved reading this part!!! Something about it made me so proud of them? like that is my power couple your ozness!!!!!

His eyes keep flitting to your quivering fingertips. His own hands twitch in his lap.

It’s a sudden feeling. It’s a new feeling.

Mingyu never thought he’d care for you, and yet here he is with his aborted attempt to reach out, to soothe, to comfort.

OH GOD HERE WE GO ITS HAPPENING

[REDACTED REACTION ONLY KAE CAN SEE]

I FFUCIKMG SCREAMEEDDDDDD

I WOULDVE BEEN LIKE I LOVE U TOO

HELLO??????????? TA[redacted] IS INSANE 😭😭😭

Someplace else— with someone else— the electricity crackling between the two of you might have been sexual tension.

- that someplace: maplegyu and xinganhao's discussions HAHAHAHA

At the last moment, he clenches his hand into a fist and draws back.

I hope u know this is what i imagined!!!!!!!!!!

Everything from "It's because it's you." until "Right. That adds up." was a rollercoaster of emotions. THIS IS ALR ANGST FOR MAPLE

“Thank you,” you say.

Plain, simple, unadorned. No explanation. It could be grace for the water. Grace for the break. Grace for the partnership. Mingyu doesn’t know, doesn’t care. He’ll take what you have to give.

His mind tries to conjure the perfect response, one that might have you feeling the same way that he is. No problem or you’re welcome or it’s just me, sunshine.

What he eventually settles on is an exhale of “Always.”

IM NOT OKAY I WAS NOT BREATHING GOD THIS WAS TOO GOOD I LOVE HIM I LOVE THEM

Mingyu loathed you in theory, but in practice? Well.

IM GONNA PULL MY FUCKING HAIR OUT

WHY THE FUCK DID I GASP OUT LOUD THIS WAS IN THE SUMMARY FUCKIN HELL

edit: it was not in the summary! MY GASP IS VALID!!!!!!

OKAY WELL CAN I EXPECT PART 2 NEXT YEAR???????? AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

unadulterated loathing! 🪄 mingyu x reader.

madame moribble's sorcery seminar has space for only two students this semester. you're forced to make a case for yourself with the one person you despise the most: kim mingyu.

★ shiz university students!mingyu x reader. ★ smau with some fic work. word count for the fic: 2,800~ ★ genre/warnings: alternate universe: modern shiz university, inspired by wicked, academic rivals, forced proximity, use of pet names, feelings realization/denial. cussing/name-calling in the spirit of bickering. this only draws from the setting of the wicked, so the given plot (i.e. wicked witch) doesn't exist here; prior knowledge of wicked is not necessary to understand the story. title is from what is this feeling. ★ footnotes: wrote this in one deranged sitting, but this is an early christmas gift for my favorite gyuldaengie, @maplegyu! 🎁 not quite the fiyero!mingyu agenda we have, but still in the same verse. ilysb. ♡

Mingyu has spent the better half of his years in Shiz going toe to toe with you.

It's to be expected, really. The two of you are the brightest of your age, tearing through your academics with ruthless precision. He always raises his hand in class. You can recite book passages word for word.

Both of you are hard to ignore, and neither of you are about to back down.

This application for the coveted Sorcery Seminar is yet another curveball that you two must navigate. You would think that after the disastrous Life Science group work in freshman year— or the Runes incident in sophomore year— that the higher-ups would know better than to force you and Mingyu into any sort of proximity.

But Madame Morrible seems intent on getting the last laugh, and Mingyu will go down swinging, if he must.

That doesn't mean he can't have a little fun, though. He shows up at the Quad at exactly five in the afternoon, making his leisurely way towards you. Everything about him is seemingly perfect. His pressed, navy blazer. His coifed dark hair.

Even the way he carries himself— practically swaggering to where you're waiting, less-than-amused— has people making way for him.

"Why the long face?" Mingyu asks sweetly in lieu of a greeting.

Your answer is curt, bordering cold. "Nothing."

Youch. "Ice queen," Mingyu mumbles under his breath as he settles onto the bench next to you.

You shoot him a glare. He flashes you a winning smile.

This was the nature of your 'relationship', or admitted lack thereof. It was a push-and-pull of Mingyu getting on your nerves every so often, of him testing how far he can draw it out before you crack.

You had your moments, though, where you could also drive him up the metaphorical wall. Like this afternoon, for instance.

You talk over him more than once. You shoot down every single idea he proposes. And you keep shifting restlessly— prompting your knee to bump into his, your elbow to hit his ribs.

When you accidentally step on the tips of his shoes in your animated, passionate denial of his nth concept, Mingyu has had just about enough.

His hand darts out until his fingers are wrapped around your wrist. Not to bruise or control, just to draw your attention to all your exaggerated movements.

"Could you stop that?" he hisses, his eyes flashing with annoyance. "I swear to the Wizard, I'm going to come out of this meeting battered and bruised."

You coo at him in retaliation, your voice sickly sweet. "Aw, what is it? Gyu-Gyu of Gillkins can't handle a little roughhousing?"

Oh, it's like that? Mingyu lets out a derisive huff before dropping your hand. You give him the small concession of scooting a bit further down the bench, putting some much-needed distance between the two of you.

Mingyu's not about to let your little jab slide, though. "You talk big game for someone who goes running in the other direction whenever there's a spider around," he says wryly.

Your response is defensive, sending the two of you shuttling down your typical back-and-forth. "That was one time! Might I remind you that you once thought river fairies were mayflies?"

"Bringing up stuff from freshman year, huh? I vaguely recall you mixing up Bunbury and Bunnybury for years—"

"You still can't cast a half-decent Alarte Ascendare charm—"

"And your voice cracks whenever you try to hit the high note in Dear Old Shiz—"

"Okay, enough!"

Mingyu presses his lips tight in a poor attempt to hide his smirk. Your expression is positively murderous, contorted in one of sheer annoyance.

No, annoyance is too light of a word, too generous of a feeling. Your flushed face and Mingyu's jackhammer pulse are not mere products of some petty vexation, some harmless flirtation.

It's unadulterated loathing. True, deep loathing; total detestation.

You loathe Mingyu, and Mingyu loathes you.

As you pull the plug on your short-lived brainstorming session, marching off towards your dormitory with a dramatic flourish, Mingyu can't help but revel in the feeling. He feels like he just ran a damn marathon, all from spending twenty minutes of bickering with you.

Odd as it may seem, Mingyu has never felt so alive.

Even though you don't say it, Mingyu knows you think his idea is good.

He can see it in your acquiescence, in the way you let him run his mouth just a little more. He wants to preen over getting this little upper-hand, no matter how insignificant it may be. The two of you are working on something he suggested.

You can call him all the nasty names in the book, but your begrudging acceptance is like a trophy to him.

It's why he's so cheery as the two of you reconvene to flesh out the project. You're benevolent enough to let Mingyu wax poetics about cursed objects being integral to Oz's landscape, though you keep him from rambling when he tries to position himself as the more brilliant one between the two of you.

"Don't get cocky," you warn as you lay out the material you'll be working on for the day.

"Methinks the lady doth protest too much," Mingyu shoots back, though he does give in and shut up for once. He's not about to push his luck. It's only half-time, after all, and he has a whole lot more of winning to do.

The two of you had agreed on flowers. For a moment, neither of you do anything about the assortment of blooms laid out on the desk in front of you. It takes Mingyu a beat too long to realize that you're looking up at him.

"What?" His free hand— the one not holding his practice wand— reaches up to his cheek. "Is there something on my face?"

The unamused glare you give him almost makes him chuckle.

"It was your idea," you point out. "So you start us off."

Ah. Mingyu knows you'll tear him a new one if he tells you the truth, which is that he didn't really think he'd get this far.

He was fully prepared for the two of you to disagree until the deadline, or to perhaps start groveling at Madame Morrible's feet for a new partner.

With this half-baked idea, though, the two of you are more likely to have to see this affair to completion.

"Right." Mingyu squares his shoulders, eyeing the flowers atop the table. "I suppose we could, er, start with some basic curses."

There's a Cheshire cat-like grin on your face that Mingyu doesn't like one bit. He steels himself for the blow, which inevitably lands in you saying, "You have no idea what we're supposed to do."

He scrunches up his nose in an expression of mock displeasure. "We're going to show off practical knowledge of enchantments," he rattles off. "Provide insight into the ethical implications of magical creations. Equip sorcerers with problem-solving skills necessitated by—"

You cut into Mingyu's tirade with a dismissive wave of your own wand.

"Blah, blah, blah," you drawl. "Ethics, insight, got it. But application? What about that, Kim?"

Mingyu has to bite back a curse from slipping past his lips. You're so infuriating. He wants to wipe that smug look off of your face, though he isn't exactly sure how he might go about that just yet.

"Maybe you want to contribute something," he grumbles, his lower lip jutting out in an almost-pout. "I already came up with the idea of the project, sweets."

Anyone else who might've been on the receiving end of Mingyu's pet names might have swooned. You always bristled, acting like he had uttered something vile.

Today, you remain perfectly unperturbed, content to have Mingyu squirm as you roll up the sleeves of your school blouse.

"Watch and weep," you say, your wand poised over the flowers.

There's nothing Mingyu hates more, really, than the reminder of just how good you are. The two of you were academic monsters to begin with, though you had your respective strengths and weaknesses. Mingyu excelled in theories; you dominated practice.

In some alternate universe, the two of you might have been an unstoppable duo. As it is, though, Mingyu can only hope that your fragile truce will hold long enough to secure you both that class slot.

He tries his darndest to keep his awe at bay as you mumble incantations. The curses you leave on the flowers seem to be mostly minor.

The daisy's leaves begin to flutter like propellers. The carnation starts to rapidly change colors. The rose goes through a constant process of wilting and rebirth, the dried petals pooling on the table with each cycle.

When Mingyu steals a glance at you, he notices the sweat beading your temples. Magic took a lot out of a person, and to cast three spells in a row was no joke.

"First, we should do a magical construction analysis." Your voice is a little tighter, a little more strained. Probably from the exhaustion. "And then a de-cursing process. Strategies and techniques for reversing or neutralizing the curse."

You go on to talk about how your demonstration for Madame Morrible should go— something about a live reversal or containment of a curse, and a detailed explanation of their findings— but Mingyu is only half-listening.

His eyes keep flitting to your quivering fingertips. His own hands twitch in his lap.

It's a sudden feeling. It's a new feeling.

Mingyu never thought he'd care for you, and yet here he is with his aborted attempt to reach out, to soothe, to comfort.

In between piles of schoolwork and preparations for the demonstration, Mingyu hardly has any time to notice the shifts in your relationship. You don't seem any the wiser, either, which is saying something. You tended to have a better emotional quotient than his overdramatic self, anyhow.

But there are shifts. Small changes in the day to day that are imperceptible to the less-discerning eye.

The two of you remain cutthroat in the classroom, drawing your peers' ire with your relentless rivalry. Behind closed doors, though, there's something more akin to… civility?

Mingyu wouldn't dare call it friendship. He's not that naive. He just knows there's an ounce of kindness, now. Some self-imposed restraint, some begrudging respect.

As the two of you move on to executing more complicated curses, the changing dynamic bears down in the most glaring ways.

"Enough."

The word comes out as a wheeze, but Mingyu injects it with just enough authority to have you pause. You don't look any better than he does. You're folded in half, your hands resting on your knees as you try to catch your breath.

The spell that neither of you could conjure just yet involved a hand mirror and an ancient curse. So far, all the two of you have managed is to make the mirror sing.

"Let's— take a break," Mingyu offers.

Your response is to be expected. "I don't need a break. I need to get this stupid curse right."

A muscle in Mingyu's jaw jumps. He stares down at you with a look of sheer incredulity, and you only return his glare with a defiant one of your own. Someplace else— with someone else— the electricity crackling between the two of you might have been sexual tension.

Alas, Mingyu knows it's nothing more than your shared animosity.

… Right?

He breaks the silence with a mumble of, "I need a break. Give me five minutes."

Honestly, Mingyu could keep going. He thinks he has it in him to try and cast the spell a couple more times, but he's willing to look weak if it means getting you to pause.

You don't even have a snappy retort or a smartass insult to his declaration. All you give is a jerky nod of your head before you lumber off towards the nearest chair in the otherwise-empty classroom. A peculiar expression flashes across Mingyu's face as he watches you walk, almost like every step that you take is an effort. You miss the look in favor of practically collapsing on to one of the desks.

"Wizard Almighty," Mingyu cusses lowly. He reaches your side in a couple of strides, though he pauses with his hand hovering over your shoulder.

At the last moment, he clenches his hand into a fist and draws back.

"Is this seminar class really worth dying for?" he muses, shoving his hands into the pockets of his slacks.

"I'm not— dying," you choke out. "I just need— a—"

There's an edge of exasperation in Mingyu's tone. "You need a break. It's just me. You can admit that."

Before you can shoot back, Mingyu wanders off to his backpack. He digs through it for a moment before he can procure his water bottle, which he wordlessly places onto the desk you're on.

You give a quiet sound of appreciation before uncorking the bottle and taking a long swig. The rehydration seems to invigorate you in the slightest, enough for you to straighten to your full height. Mingyu holds back on teasing you over the way you've emptied his drink.

The first words you say after you've caught your breath are "It's because it's you."

Mingyu's eyebrows knit together in confusion. He tilts his head to one side, looking every bit like the confused puppy he's often likened to. "Pardon?"

"You said— I can admit that I need a break, because it's just you." You place Mingyu's water bottle down, your hands bracing the edge of the desk as you speak. You're looking up at Mingyu, but you're not quite looking at him. It's like your gaze is fixed on something just beyond his line of sight, and it hits him that you're avoiding his gaze.

You clarify, "I didn't want to admit that I needed a break to you."

His immediate reaction is to protest. To laugh and call you stupid, to question your faulty logic. But when Mingyu's lips part, the insult at the very tip of his tongue—

He finds that his words are just out of reach.

Because, for better or for worse, he understands where you're coming from. The two of you have exploited each other's weaknesses, have poked and prodded holes into each other's defenses. Why should this be any different?

There's an inexplicable twinge in Mingyu's chest. A tangible, physical tightening, over the spot where his heart is.

He had wanted it to be different. He doesn't know why, but he thought that this might make things different.

Instead, he manages to push out a heatless, "Right. That adds up."

Neither of you say anything for a while. The five-minute break stretches into seven, then ten. Right before the fifteen-minute mark, you say, "I think we should call it a day."

Mingyu— who has spent the past quarter of an hour trying to untangle his thoughts— jumps at the suggestion.

"Definitely," he says a little too enthusiastically. "Yeah, yeah. Let's… tomorrow?"

"Tomorrow. Same time?"

"Got it."

You gather your things and begin to make your way out of the classroom. Mingyu moves a little slower, not wanting to have to prolong any conversation if the two of you were to leave together.

He thinks he'll never have an answer to the question clanging in his mind until you pause halfway out of the door.

"Kim Mingyu."

He freezes in the middle of adjusting his bag strap over his shoulder. "Hm?" he hums, trying his best to act noncommittal even though his entire posture is already defensive in nature.

The sight of it seems to amuse you, because the ghost of a smile tugs at your lips. It's not a smile that you've ever given him. He's seen it in the corner of his eye, witnessed you dole it out to underclassmen and friends. And maybe he's always been a bit envious, a bit desperate to be on the receiving end of it.

Now that he is, he feels like he just got punched in the gut.

"Thank you," you say.

Plain, simple, unadorned. No explanation. It could be grace for the water. Grace for the break. Grace for the partnership. Mingyu doesn't know, doesn't care. He'll take what you have to give.

His mind tries to conjure the perfect response, one that might have you feeling the same way that he is. No problem or you're welcome or it's just me, sunshine.

What he eventually settles on is an exhale of "Always."

He wants to kick himself for it. Who the hell says 'always' to 'thank you'? a chiding voice screams in the back of his head. What does that even mean?!

He winces outwardly. Your smile widens slightly, just enough to throw him off balance once again.

And then you're gone, your footsteps echoing down Shiz' hall, leaving Mingyu with the answer.

Mingyu loathed you in theory, but in practice? Well.

He's so caught up in trying to unpack his realization that he nearly misses the quiet ping of his phone in his pocket.