#rain?? being so blissed out?? the whimpering?? the softness?? i’m not okay

[aylinaliens]

admittedly, the first time i watched love in the air i wasn’t a fan. the characters, plot, and romance were enjoyable but something wasn’t clicking. the second time, however? i don’t know what changed between that time and now but i’m absolutely going feral over prapaisky and phayurain they make me kwjfjqjdjwjfjej you know??

[all-about-kyu]

Summary: You damn well knew your heat was coming… it’s nothing your boyfriends can’t handle, though. Pairing: Chinchilla!Wooyoung x fem Bat Eared Fox!reader x Fennec Fox!Yeosang x Several!San Tropes: hybrid au, poly au, established relationship au Genre: fluff, smut Rating: R18+ Warnings: language Smut Warnings: mxm, biting, predator-prey play, pet names, dry humping, implied heat sex Word Count: 1,044 Note: Merry Christmas @atiny-piratequeen!! I hope you enjoy <3 (and thank you to @kwanisms and @wooahaeproductions for beta reading!!)

“You feeling okay, Kit?” San asks quietly.

You nod, “I’m okay, just feeling a bit clingy.” you reassure as you nuzzle closer to his scent gland.

The ends of San’s blonde mullet tickle against your skin, but it doesn’t bother you one bit. Unknown to you, San gives a glance to Yeosang. The Fennec Fox’s pale tan ears shift toward him before his eyes do. When he does make eye contact with San, he’s immediately aware of what’s about to smack you all in the face. You stay clung to your kitty boyfriend, peacefully buried in his neck and inhaling his scent as much as possible. Yeosang quietly leaves the living room in search of your third boyfriend. Wooyoung, being the only prey hybrid, always made for an interesting dynamic. Despite his status as a prey, he’s absolutely the fiery, playful one in the relationship.

It doesn’t take Yeosang long to find the bubbly Chinchilla. Wooyoung is happily munching on his lunch at the breakfast bar. He immediately knows something is off, though, when Yeosang approaches him.

“What’s wrong?” Wooyoung asks, voice laced with concern.

“It’s just that-” Yeosang is cut off by a whimper coming from the living room.

The two share a look before making their way toward the sound. They hadn’t expected to see you pinned down to the couch with San barring his canines at you. He’s definitely not mad at you. If anything, he’s holding himself back. You have a blissed-out expression on your face. That’s all the other two need to know what’s happening.

“Kit,” San practically purrs out, “You smell so fucking good.”

“San,” Yeosang says with a warning air, “Off. Now.”

San’s eyes flit to the other fox for a moment before returning to you. Your eyebrows furrow in pure desperation. Your fox ears fall horizontally, almost fully lost in your hair. 

“Do you want this, Kit?” San questions, putting just enough space between you so that you can breathe easily.

“Sannie,” you practically whine.

“Use your words properly, Kit.” The kitty purrs again.

Despite San still hovering over you, Wooyoung’s fresh rain scent completely surrounds you. San’s sweet strawberry scent still floods directly into your nose. But, for some reason the scent of Wooyoung’s fresh rain is overpowering both the kitty’s strawberry and the other fox’s pear blossom. Even your own scent is overpowering. Normally, you can’t smell yourself, though, right now, you’re hyperaware of your amber scent. 

“I need you.” 

You let out a low whistle sound that only exemplifies your need. Normally, Yeosang is the only one who can really hear it. With him being another fox, he knows exactly what each one of your sounds means without needing an explanation. He steps closer and squats down to be at your eye level.

“What do you need?” His voice is tender and soft, unlike San’s.

“I need you. Need all three of you. Woo’s scent is so strong, that I know his rut is probably triggered by my heat. Please, I need you all so desperately.” 

A stray tear escapes your eye, and Yeosang wipes it away. Before you can even process the tender gesture, San’s lips are against the scent gland at the base of your neck. You moan at the sensation. His teeth are gently scraping along your throat a moment later, his sharp canines leaving small red marks behind.

Wooyoung joined at some point. His hands are gently brushing through the fur of your tail. His fluffy chinchilla ears are twitching, a habit you’ve noticed happens when he’s focused. Once in a while, he tugs at your tail, making you shudder with need. Yeosang methodically massages your ears and hair, knowing each time he touches your furry ears, you grow just a tad more desperate for them.

“Shall we take you to bed, pretty?” Yeosang whispers lowly in your ear.

“I think she’s just fine right here, no?” Wooyoung adds, hearing Yeosang’s whisper clearly.

You throw your legs around San’s waist before flipping him over and pinning him to the couch. You smirk, displaying your pearly white, sharp canines. Your eyes are dilated, and all you can think about is how desperately you want to use your pretty boyfriend’s cocks.

“I think I’m just fine right here.” You chuckle.

“K-kit?” San stutters out, his strawberry scent spiking sweeter.

“Let me use your cock, pretty kitty.” 

You start grinding against your kitty boyfriend’s clothed member. Small moans and whines escape his lips each time you roll your hips against his tip. You hear a small whine come from your chinchilla boyfriend. First, your ear turns toward him, then the rest of your head.

“Don’t worry,” you smirk, “I’ll use all of you. Use you until I’m satisfied, and you’re all crying, begging me to give you a break.”

“Kit,” Yeosang says with a low warning whistle, “Watch who you’re talking to.”

You climb off of San’s lap and into Yeosang’s. He’s not going down without a fight it seems. His eyes are burning with desire, but he’s trying not to let you get the upper hand. You pepper kisses along his jaw and neck. His pear blossom scent engulfs you so much that you almost forget your other two boyfriends are there. That is, until, you hear a small chitter from Wooyoung. You glance for a moment and see the youngest alpha pressed against the area rug while San nips at his skin and grinds against him. You know they’re both content taking care of each other while you slowly break down Yeosang’s reserve.

After a few wet kisses to his scent gland, you bite it. Not enough to draw blood, but enough to get a rise out of him. Rolling your hips against his, you let out a few whiney sounds, knowing it would get to him quicker. You overhear San chirp lightly, followed by another chitter from Wooyoung. You don’t even look what they’re up to.

“You know you want to let me use you. Don’t you, Sangie?” You tease.

“Kit,” he tries to warn, though, his voice is far more submissive than it was a moment ago.

“Yes?” You nearly purr.

“You gonna use me?” He nearly whines in response.

You chuckle, “You don’t have to tell me twice.”

COPYRIGHT STARLITMARK 2023© ALL RIGHTS RESERVED — reposting/modifying any fic or piece of original writing posted on this blog is not allowed. Translations are not permitted. 

Networks: @cultofdionysusnet @kwritersworld @k-vanity @monsterfvckersunited

Tag List: @sanjoongie @jaehunnyy @ericssmile @anyamaris @almondmilkeu @shinestarhwaa @northerngalaxy

[maaaaaatryoshka0325]

Kiss Me, Idiot - Hwang Hyunjin Enemies to Lovers au

Requested <3 

I mixed two requests together, and I hope it’s okay/ you guys like it! :)

Warnings: Smut ( a lot of it), Angst, fluff

Hwang Hyunjin, a name you detested. He was your typical bad boy; leather jacket, tight ripped jeans with a chain attached to two belt loops, a dangly earring, a tight necklace dangling from his neck, and unruly messy black hair. He had a smile that could turn any girl's legs to jelly, and an obnoxious laugh that would echo throughout the whole school. If he���s so perfect, why do you dislike him? Well, he loved to mess with you any chance he got. You were both complete opposites, natural enemies at its best. He was an extrovert that naturally drew people to him, and you were a shy introvert who spent most of her time studying and working. He always walked around with his clique, a group of guys who dressed the same, all extremely attractive and heart throbs. They always had girls approaching and following them around, almost every girl confessing to one of them. Hyunjin was the most popular, along with Chan and Minho. You had a few classes with Felix, who was, oddly enough, incredibly sweet. None of the others liked to torture you. In fact, they were almost pretty normal. But leave it to Hwang Hyunjin to ruin your day. His little teasing sessions were psychically harmless, but man did they piss you off. Not because what he said was offensive, but because they made your cheeks turn red and your stomach start to turn with butterflies and self consciousness.“You’re so easily flustered, it’s almost pathetic.” He said as he leaned in close to your desk in your second class, where he, unfortunately, sat beside you. “Shut it.” You muttered, looking down at the paper you were writing.

“Watcha writin’?” He asked, leaning over to peek at your paper.

“None of your business.” You said flatly, moving the paper from his eyes.

He gave you a small pout and sat back in his seat, his lip between his teeth. The rings on his fingers glistened in the room's light, and he smirked as he aimed the glare directly at you. You groaned and looked over at him, heavily irritated.

“Seriously? Don’t you have somewhere else to be annoying?” You asked.

“Not until 12, after this class.” He said with a smirk.

You rolled your eyes and continued writing your paper, eagerly waiting for the class to be over. A whiff of his cologne hit your nose and you turned your head, your noses brushing, making you jump back. He let out a loud laugh, his eyes scrunching up as they always did.

“Do I make you nervous babygirl?” He asked.

“Don’t call me that.” You mumbled.

“Why not?” He asked.

“I’m not your babygirl.” You growled.

His eyes sparkled with amusement at your words, and he finally fell silent as your professor began to explain the notes he had left on the board. You hated sitting next to him in class, you hated how he always tried to distract you. He had chosen that seat specifically to torture you. You felt eyes on you and they wandered to where another boy was sitting a few rows away from you. He smirked at you and winked before turning around back to the board. His little gesture didn’t go unnoticed.

Xxxx

You put your books in your locker, excited for the weekend. You finally had a weekend off of both school and work, and you could finally just vegetate in bed. You stepped out of the school’s doors, sighing loudly as rain began to plop you on the head. You lived about fifteen minutes off of campus, but at least it wasn’t pouring. You began to regret not bringing your hoodie, not realizing it was supposed to rain. You could see your puffs of breath in the air, your hands clutching the long sleeves of your sweater tightly as you made your way through the dreary streets, your hair starting to fluff up and stick to the sides of your face. Your teeth chattering was the only thing you could hear over the sound of the drizzling rain over the city, your clothes starting to dampen and the chill of the early spring began to bite at your skin. You saw a small awning hanging off of a shop and stepped under it, quickly checking your phone to see if the rain was supposed to let up any time soon. The rain still managed to get you, dripping down from rips in the awning. It was better than being out in the open, but you still let out an irritated sigh. You quickly checked your phone to see if the rain would let up soon, when you heard something behind you. You turned around, your face plastering straight into someone’s chest. The familiar cologne filled your nose, and you quickly looked up to see Hyunjin looking down at you, quirking a brow.

“I knew you were into me, but I didn’t expect for you to throw yourself at me, Y/N.” He said, letting out a small chuckle.

You backed away from him as soon as you realized who it was, your cheeks a bright shade of red.

“As if.” You mumbled, turning away from him and stepping out from under the awning. It had started to pour, the rain instantly soaking through your clothing.

“Getting a little wet there?” Hyunjin asked, following you from under the awning. The leather jacket he wore had a hood attached to it, his hair lightly framing his face as he looked down at you.

“A little bit.” You huffed out, your teeth chattering as you went to ignore him. You heard him following you so you went to turn around and tell him to fuck off, when he plopped his jacket over you, the hood attaching to your head. His body heat was still on the hoodie, warming your body almost instantly. “What’s this for?”

“You’re cold, aren’t you?” He asked.

“You’re gonna get soaked-“ You started, but he instantly cut you off.

“I’ll be fine,” He said. “Do you live close by?”

You nodded and told him where you lived, and he turned in that direction.

“What are you doing?” You asked, knowing his dorm was the opposite direction.

“Walking you home. My dorm is too far to walk without my jacket.” He said, his eyes sparkling with amusement.

You knew he was teasing you, and he was most likely gonna tease you about knowing where your apartment was, but he was doing you a kindness, oddly enough. You slid your arms and body fully into his jacket, his warmth and scent all over you. Your body warmed up instantly, and you kept glancing over at him to see if he was cold, but his teeth didn’t chatter and his lips didn’t turn red or blue from the chill. When you got to your apartment, you led him up the stairs and in front of your door, going to open it.

“Aren’t you going to give me my jacket back? Or do you plan on sleeping with it?” Hyunjin asked, amused.

“Well I was gonna invite you in, but now I’m having second thoughts.” You shot at him.

“Oooh, trying to get me alone are you? You’re cute and all, but I don’t screw around with little virgins.” He teased.

Your blood boiled at his words. So what if you were a virgin? At least you weren’t a desperate player like him.

“As if.” You growled at him, turning and looking him directly in the eye. “You think so highly of yourself Hwang, but you’re just a pretty face, and probably a bad kisser. Your ego is bigger than your dick anyways.”

For some reason, Hyunjin’s eyes darkened and he backed you up into your door, his large frame hovering over you as he slammed his hand onto the door beside your head. He lowered his face to level with yours, anger in his eyes. “Just a pretty face? A bad kisser? My ego is bigger than my dick?” He asked, his voice asking.

You went to say something, when his lips met yours. They were soft and tasted of honey, molding into yours. Your eyes closed as you leaned into the kiss, making him smirk into your lips as he deepened the kiss, his tongue coming out and swiping your bottom lip. You whimpered into his mouth as he grabbed your key, which was already in the door, and turned it; the both of you half stumbling into your apartment. You were grateful your roommate, Yeji, was a party animal and decided to leave early to get ready at another friend's house. His body was over yours, your back against the wall to your small living room as his hands went down to your waist, digging into the flesh as his lips parted from yours, a small trail of saliva attaching the two of you. He smirked at your hazy expression and attached his lips to your neck, nibbling your soft skin. Your fingers clutches his shirt tightly, small whimpers leaving your lips.

“You’re so sensitive baby girl.” He rasped.

“Well,” You sighed, closing your eyes as he sucked on your sweet spot. “I’ve never…”

Hyunjin froze as he pulled away, his eyes wide in shock as he pulled away from you. “I-I’m sorry, I shouldn’t of-“

You grabbed his shirt, your cheeks a light shade of pink.

“Please don’t stop.” You said in a small voice, your cheeks darkening. “I-I liked it..”

You noticed his cheeks turned a light shade of pink as he gently grabbed your hip, his finger gently lifting your chin up as he looked down at you.

Do you want this?” He asked. “Like, you’re sure you want this?”

“Yes, please Hyunjin.” You whispered, your large eyes innocently looking up at him.

He smirked and then buried his face back into your neck, sucking harshly on the skin, making you whimper. He carried you to your room, kicking the door shut with his foot as he dropped you on the bed, lifting his shirt over his head. Your cheeks turned red when you saw his toned body, possibly the best body you’ve ever laid eyes on. He kicked his shoes off and then hovered over you, connecting his lips to your neck again. He nipped along your throat as his hands roamed your body, finally getting a good grasp on your boobs. You moaned as he began to rub them, grinding his hips down against yours. Your fingers locked in his soft, dark hair, your eyes closed in bliss at his soft nips and his hands rubbing your boobs. His hands gently went down to your waist, slipping your leggings off and pressing his covered bulge against your clothed heat. He gently grabbed the hem of your shirt and lifted it over your head, his eyes raking down your almost fully exposed figure. You covered yourself and he chuckled, moving your hands from over your body.

 “You have a cute body, Y/N.” He purred.

You blushed at his words, your cheeks turning red as he wrapped his arms around you, his fingers popping the hooks of your bra. His eyes ate your bare boobs as he leaned forward, sucking one into his mouth. Your back arched, your clothed heat pressing harder against him. He smirked as his lips stayed wrapped around your nipple, his fingers on his other hand rolling your other nipple. Your fingers lightly tugged in his hair, and he let out a soft groan as you did so.

“You’re so sensitive, I love it.” He rasped, his fingers trailing down your body.

His hands gently slid your panties down, his eyes eating your glistening core. You went to close your legs, but he grabbed them and pressed them down, giving you a look that said “don’t even think about it.’ He lowered his face and blew on your dripping heat, making you whimper as he smirked.

“Just relax babygirl, I’ll take care of you.” He purred, licking a long, bold strip up your pussy.

Your back arched into his face as he sucked your clit into his mouth, his hands gripping your thighs tightly. Soft moans left your lips as you kept your fingers tangled in his hair. His tongue rolled your clit expertly, his plump lips wrapped around your aching nub.

“Fuck- Hyunjin.” You moaned, making him smirk..

“I’m gonna put a finger in, okay?” He asked, looking up at you.

You nodded, admiring his wet, swollen lips, and half lidded eyes full of desire. He pressed a soft kiss to your stomach before he gently slid his pointer finger into you, making you whimper. He brought himself up and kissed your lips, your essence coating your own lips as he deepened the kiss, his tongue dancing with yours. His finger worked you open as he pumped it in and out of you, his thumb rubbing your clit as he curled his finger up into your gspot. You gasped into his mouth, your fingers tugging on his hair as he smirked against your lips and continued to curl his finger into the same spot.

“Oh god, Hyunjin.” You moaned, making him chuckle.

“Yes babygirl? Do you want more?” He cooed.

“Yes- please, please give me more.” You whined.

He swiftly pushed his joggers and boxers down in one swift motion, your eyes widening at his length. It was long, and had about average size in girth. He brought his lips to yours, his eyes surprisingly soft.

“Fuck, do you have condoms? I don’t carry any.” He sighed.

“I-I’m on the pill.” You blushed.

He quirked a brow at you, a small smirk on his lips. “Oh? Did you plan this? Is little Y/N not so innocent?”

“No!” You squealed with a blush. “I take it for other feminine things!”

He chuckled and kissed your forehead, making you blush harder. He pressed himself to your entrance, his hands intertwining with yours as he pressed another kiss to your lips. “Tell me if it hurts, I’ll go slow.”

You nodded as he gently pushed forward, his length pushing into your walls. You grit your teeth as he began to stretch you, and you let out a tiny whimper. He stopped his hips and brought his lips to yours, his hand squeezing yours. He slowly pushed in another inch and you whined, his one hand detaching from yours so he could push your hair out if your face and stroke it.

“Just a little more, kitten.” He whispered reassuringly.

You closed your eyes tight as he slid the last few inches in, and you let out a soft whine as he bottomed out. He left soft kisses on your face as he let you adjust.

“You did so well, Kitten.” He praised you softly, making your heart flutter.

You shifted your hips to let him know you were ready, and he slowly drew his hips back and pushed back into you. Your fingernails dug into his biceps as he thrusted into you, his lips parted as he let out a low groan.

“So damn tight.” He rasped.

You let out a loud whine as he shifted his hips, starting to fluidly thrust his hips into yours. His length was long, and it was hitting your sweet spot with every thrust and roll of his hips. His dark eyes went up and met yours, his length hitting deeper into you, making you throw your head back deeper into the pillows. Hyunjin leaned forward and started to kiss and nip at your neck, a small smirk on his face as his pace picked up. Your nails dug into his bare, broad shoulders, making him groan into the skin on your throat, his warm breath fanning your soft skin.

“Fuck, I’m gonna cum.” He groaned, dropping his long, elegant fingers down to your clit and rubbing fast circles.

Your whole body tensed as you came around him, a loud moan ripping from your throat. Hyunjin groaned and quickly pulled out of you, cumming on your thighs.

“Fuck.” He groaned, rubbing himself and milking his length dry, his eyes hooded and plump lips parted.

His eyes slowly made their way to yours, a small smirk on his lips. You rolled your eyes, and before you could say anything, he had gotten up, putting his boxers on. You weren’t surprised he was leaving right after he got what he wanted. You slowly sat up, wincing at the pain and the sticky feeling on your thighs from his cum and your blood lightly staining your inner thighs. You stopped when he appeared back into your vision, one of your shirts from your laundry basket in his hands. You were beyond shocked when he pushed you back down and cleaned the mess between your thighs, your cheeks red.

“Y-You didn’t have to do that.” You stuttered, not being able to make eye contact with him.

“Well, it wouldn’t have been nice of me to leave you here like this, right?” He asked, a small smile on his face.

“When are you nice?” You joked.

He threw your shirt, that was covered in his cum, at your face, the wet part sticking directly to your cheeks.

“Hwang Hyunjin!!!” You screamed at him, making him cackle. He went to run when you jumped on him, knocking him over as you landed on him. He laughed as you straddled him, trying to whack him. His hands grabbed you wrists, holding them tightly as he giggled at the pout that was playing on your lips.

“Ya know, you’re kinda cute when you pout.” He chuckled.

“Yeah? And you’re kinda cute when you don’t talk.” You said with a huff. He smirked at you and grabbed your ass, his fingers digging into the soft flesh as he lifted himself up and pressed his lips to yours. And this is where it all began, the unspoken agreement to keep seeing each other this way.

Xxxx

Yeji spit out her drink, her eyes going straight to your marked up neck. You and Hyunjin have been seeing each other a little more recently, always when Yeji wasn’t around. Her hand moved your hair out of the way, her eyes popping out of her head when you swatted her hand away and covered the marks with your hand.

“And where did you get those from Y/N?” She asked in disbelief.

“No one.” You said quickly, your cheeks heating up with embarrassment.

“Mhmmmm!” She said with a big smile. “So who is it? Hm? Hm? Tell me!”

You covered your face and she giggled and hugged you.

“My little Y/N isn’t a virgin anymore!” She squealed. “You have to tell me who it was!”

“You’re gonna judge me!” You groaned.

“No I won’t!” She said, putting her hand over her heart. “I promise!”

“It-It was… Hyunjin…” You said quietly.

Her eyes popped out of her head, her jaw dropping as she stared at you. She gripped her chest and dramatically backed into the wall.

“My little Y/N lost her virginity to Hwang Hyunjin!” She gasped.

“Shhhh!” You snickered, your cheeks red.

“How did that happen?! I thought you hated him!” She squealed.

“He walked me home after letting me use his jacket when it was raining a couple weeks ago, and when we got here I taunted him and next thing I knew, I lost my virginity.” You laughed.

“I can’t believe you lost your virginity to that guy!” She laughed, shaking her head in disbelief. “I can’t believe people believe he and I are related.”

“I mean, you two do look alike.” You said, looking at her facial features.

Yeji arched a brow, a mischievous grin on her face. “Are you saying you’d bang me too, Y/N?”

She squealed as you whacked her arm, her laugh echoing in your small apartment.

Xxxxx

“You’re so annoying!” You huffed, glaring at Hyunjin.

He had come into your job, where you worked at a bubble tea/smoothie bar, and he had been annoying you for the past half hour. His intense, cat like eyes were bright with amusement as he sucked the straw of his taro bubble tea into the side of his mouth. He was lucky it was dead in the shop, or you’d kill him for annoying you.

“C’mon kitten, don’t act like that.” He purred, his eyes eating you up.

“Don’t call me that.” You snapped.

“You shouldn’t be back talking to me that way.” He cooed.

“I’ll talk to you anyway I want too, Hwang.” You growled, finishing the cleaning in the small lounge area.

“I would stop if I were you.” He said lowly.

“Or what?” You asked, arching a brow. “What are you gonna do?”

In an instant, his hand was around your throat, your eyes popping out of your head as he stared intently in your eyes.

“You just messed up, babygirl.” He growled, backing you into the bathroom.

He pushed you down onto your knees, his eyes holding yours as his hand remained around your throat. He raised his other hand and brushed the few strands of hair that were in your face, his eyes hard as he stared down at you.

“I think I need to shut that pretty little mouth of yours, don’t you agree, Kitten?” He asked.

You went to open your mouth to say something, when his thumb slid up and slipped into your mouth, your lips wrapping around it.

“That’s it, Kitten.” He purred.

His free hand slid down to his belt, unbuckling it and pushing his tight, dark jeans down to his thighs. His length was forming a large tent in his boxers, making your mouth water around his thumb, saliva dripping down to his knuckle. He smirked down at you as he withdrew his thumb from your mouth, spreading your saliva around your lips.

“Now be a good girl.” He growled, taking his hardened length out and rubbing it along your saliva covered lips.

You wrapped your lips around his tip, your tongue poking out and running along his slit. His hand went to your cheek, gently rubbing it with his thumb as you looked up at him, making him release a small groan.

“So cute with your lips around my dick.” He groaned.

You pushed your head down, taking as much of him as you could. Your hand went down to his balls, gently cupping them as you pulled your head back and took him back down your throat, earning a guttural groan from his lips. You looked back up at him, his pretty lips parted, his eyes closed in bliss. His hand wrapped itself in your hair as he began to guide your mouth up and down, slurping and choking sounds filling the bathroom. Your fingers gently massaged his balls as you kept taking him down your throat, and you noticed his thighs starting to shake.

 “I’m gonna cum Kitten, can I cum down that cute little throat of yours?” He asked through gritted teeth, trying his hardest not to grip your head and violently face fuck you.

 You hummed around his length as you swirled your tongue around, taking him to the base. His eyes closed tight as he rocked his hips foreword, a deep groan leaving his lips as his cum shot down your throat, and you eagerly swallowed around him, your hands gripping his thighs tightly. His hand gripped your hair hard as his cum leaked down your throat, his breathing ragged. “That’s it, Kitten.” He rasped. “Drink it all.”

His hand loosened in your hair, his hand gently stroking the side of your head. He slowly pulled out of your mouth, a string of saliva attaching to the tip of his length. He pulled you up and attached his lips to yours, his hands grabbing your waist. “Now finish up here Kitten, I’d love to give you your reward for being so good.”

Xxxx

Hyunjin panted as his hips snapped into yours, his hand in your hair as he slammed into you from behind. His hand had your face pinned into the bed, your loud moans muffled by your pillow.

“Fuck.” Hyunjin groaned. “You’re so tight.”

“Y-You’re so- fuck- so deep.” You moaned loudly.

“Is that right?” Hyunjin cooed, bending forward and going deeper, his hands planted on either side of your head. “You like when my big dick is deep in that pretty little pussy?”

“I love it.” You moaned loudly, fingers digging into your comforter. “I love it so much.”

“Good girl.” He grunted, slamming his hips into yours.

You saw stars as you came, your clenching heat tightening around him. He pulled out with a loud grunt, cumming on your ass. The two of you panted as he grabbed the roll of paper towels beside your bed (which you had gotten because of him), and he gently wiped his cum off of your ass. He plopped down beside you after, and you were quite shocked when he threw his arm over your waist, pressing a soft kiss to the back of your bare shoulder. His hand gently massaged your hip, a small laugh leaving his lips.

“I’m hungry.” He whined into your skin.

“Yeji and I haven’t gone food shopping yet.” You sighed. “I don’t get paid till Friday.”

“I can always order us some take out.” He suggested.

“Don’t worry about me, get whatever you want.” You laughed.

Hyunjin frowned at you, arching a brow. “What do you want?”

“Hyunjin-“

“What do you want?” He asked again, more sternly.

“Well, what are you in the mood for?” You asked.

Hyunjin laid there for a minute, puzzling over what he was in the mood for. “I think I want some sushi.”

“Sushi sounds so good right now.” You agreed.

Hyunjin called and ordered the sushi, adding two bubble teas and some dumplings with them. You grabbed your blankets and set up the couch, putting a movie on for the both of you. Hyunjin had made a habit of staying around after your little hookup sessions, not that you minded too much. He kept you company, and despite you thinking he was obnoxious, it was kind of nice having him around. He’d make you laugh a lot, showed you a bunch of movies and dramas, and would either buy you dinner or help you cook (not that he was all that good at cooking, except for cooking his own fingers). 

Hyunjin had wandered into your room to grab his favorite pair of joggers that he had left at your place when the delivery man knocked on your door. You waddled over to the door, thighs still hurting from your little session with Hyunjin, and opened it. You were quite surprised to see your classmate, the one who had winked at you, standing in front of your door with your take out order.

“Y/N?” He asked.

“Oh, hi.” You greeted him with a friendly smile, not knowing how he knew your name.

“I didn’t know you lived in these apartments, they’re nice!” He said with a smile.

“Do I look too poor to live in such nice apartments?” You teased.

“Wha- no! No, that’s not what I meant!” He gasped.

You chuckled and shook your head.

“I’m only teasing.” You giggled.

He smiled at you for a moment, and you realized how pretty he was. He was quite tall, his dark hair framing his face nicely.

“I’m Chani by the way.” He said with a bigger smile, his deep voice rumbling.

Before you could say anything, Hyunjin appeared beside you, nudging you aside and handing Chani a bill and taking the food, muttering a “keep the change” as he beckoned you away from the door.

“Well, it was nice seeing you, Chani.” You said with a smile.

“Likewise, see you in class.” He said, smiling back and walking away.

You closed the door, the smile still on your face as you turned back to Hyunjin, who was eyeing you.

“You think he’s cute or something?” He asked.

“Why? You jealous or something?” You asked, arching a brow.

Hyunjin scoffed and sat down, pulling his chopsticks out of the bag and shoving a roll in his mouth, a pout on his lips.

“Awe, Jinnie.” You giggled. “Are you jealou-”

You were cut off by Hyunjin shoving one of the rolls in your mouth, your cheeks filling with rice and spicy mayo.

“Shut up and eat.” Hyunjin mumbled. “As if I’d be jealous.”

You giggled and took out your rolls and the dumplings, pressing play on the remote as the movie began to play. The only sounds heard in the were the voices from the movie, and the occasional slurping sound of one of you drinking your bubble tea. Your eyes were glued to the TV screen when you felt Hyunjin’s arm snake around you, pulling you into his side. You gave him a confused look and he chuckled.

“I can fuck you senseless, but not cuddle with you?” He asked, arching a brow.

“Whatever.” You laughed, laying your head on his chest.

As the movie played, you could hear his heart gently thumping in his chest, the sound sending waves of comfort through you. It was weird, you thought. He used to cause you so much anxiety and annoyance; and now, when you were with him, you felt as though the whole world was in place.

Xxxxx

The beats to the music blared over your head as you made your way through the crowd. It was Yeji’s birthday, and she had begged you to come and party with her. The crowded room was musky, and your skin was sticky with sweat as you pushed past multiple bodies, your drink firmly in your hand. The fact that it was late May didn’t help with the temperature in the room, and you could only sip your spiked lemonade to keep yourself cool.

Yeji knew how to party- no matter what the occasion, but she was exceptionally good at making sure someone’s birthday was a hit, including her own. She rented out the empty room you were all in, making sure to add a bunch of props. She also hired one of Hyunjin’s friends, Changbin, as the DJ.

“This party is great!” She yelled to you over the music, your body swaying to the beat.

“I think this is one of the biggest ones you’ve thrown so far!” You yelled back, giving her a bright smile.

You hadn’t partied in awhile, since you had almost gotten alcohol poisoning the last time you had partied with Yeji. You learned not to do 16 shots of vodka that night (I’ve done 16 shots of vodka in a night HAHAHAHA). And Yeji was stuck taking care of you for two days after.

You made your way to the dance floor, where the party goers were circling someone. You pushed your way to the front, your heart almost stopping. Hyunjin was in the center, dancing beautifully with a woman. Her slender form fit perfectly with him, their eyes locked as they danced together, a small smirk on his face. You never knew you’d feel the way you did that moment, your heart sitting in the bottom of your stomach. You were jealous.

Your eyes couldn’t leave the two of them, the way their bodies matched perfectly to the beat of the song, the way his long fingers went to her hip and held it. It made you feel almost sick, and the room started to spin a little. You brought your drink to your lips, trying to distract yourself with the taste of the alcohol, when you felt a light tap on your shoulder. You turned and saw Chani standing there, his dark eyes catching the little bit of light in the room, making them sparkle beautifully.

“Hey Y/N, wanna dance?” He asked.

You gave him a light smile and nodded, finishing your drink and allowing him to lead you to the center, where other couples were dancing. His larger hands found your waist, his eyes locking with yours as he moved to the beat with you. His cologne filled your nose as he smiled at you and spun you around, bringing you close to him after. You were smiling at him too, the thought of Hyunjin clear out of your mind. Chani could dance, and he could dance just as well as Hyunjin. His moves were elegant and sharp, his hands and body pressing against yours to show you how to move along with him.

After the party, he led you and Yeji to a taxi, gently kissing the back of your hand as you got into the back seat.

“I had fun tonight, you two really know how to party.” He said with a wink. “I’ll see you in school, Y/N.”

You gave him a small smile and wave and scooted into the seat beside Yeji, who had her head leaning against the window. She had drank a lot, and you had been pushing water into her mouth for the past hour. You knew you’d have to take care of her tomorrow.

Chani stepped away from the car, turning with a small smirk as Hyunjin appeared in his view.

“Problem?” Chani asked.

“What are your intentions with her, Chanhee?” Hyunjin asked.

“I don’t know why you’re so concerned, Hwang.” Chani said, walking by him and knocking his shoulder against Hyunjin’s. “Maybe is just like to have some fun with her.”

“Leave her alone.” Hyunjin growled, turning around and glaring at Chani as he walked away.

“Or what?” Chani asked, glancing behind him. “Don’t try and threaten me, it won’t turn out well for you.”

Xxxx

Your eyes scanned your exam paper, the giant 95% beautifully written in bright red ink. You had only gotten two questions wrong, so the anxiety you had been feeling since you’d taken the test was all for nothing. You sighed in relief as you slipped it into a folder and placed it in your bag, your eyes landing on Hyunjin’s empty seat. You hadn’t talked to Hyunjin since before the party, and it was your first day back since the party had happened. He didn’t try messaging you at all, which was pretty odd, because the boy had a sex drive higher than a prostitutes.

“Hey Y/N.” A voice greeted you, legs blocking your view of Hyunjin’s desk.

You looked up and saw Chani standing there, a smile on his face.

“Hi Chani.” You greeted him back.

“I had a lot of fun at the party, we should hang out again sometime.” He said, his smile remaining on his handsome features.

“Oh, sure, definitely.” You agreed, smiling back at him.

“Excuse me, you’re blocking my seat.” An irritated voice spoke from behind Chani.

You glanced up and saw Hyunjin standing there, his eyes narrowed as he stared Chani dead in his eye. You didn’t miss the smirk that stretched across Chani’s face as he slowly stepped aside, then turned to you. “I’ll talk to you after class then.”

Hyunjin hid his clenching jaw from you as he sat down, slouching in his seat as he flipped his test paper over to reveal his score. A massive 90% was at the top, but he didn’t even crack a smile at the outstanding grade. He put it in a folder and slipped it into his bag, his eyes not meeting yours.

“What’s wrong?” You asked, seeing how he was clearly pissed off.

“Nothing, Y/N.” He said flatly.

“I can clearly tell somethings wrong, Hyunjin.” You pointed out.

“Mind your business.” He growled.

“Jeez, I was just asking.” You snapped back. “Don’t need to act all bent out of shape.”

His jaw clenched again at your back talk, his fingers tapping his desk. All throughout the lecture he kept his eyes away from you, he didn’t even bother you once. You began to wonder if you caught him at a bad time, when the bell rang, and Chani began to approach you as you headed out the door. Just when he opened his mouth to greet you, Hyunjin grabbed your hand and dragged you out of the classroom, dragging you down the hall.

“Hyunjin? What the Hell are you doing?!” You asked, ripping your arm out of his grasp.

He turned to you, his eyes narrowed and jaw tight. “Chani isn’t a good person, don’t talk to him.”

“I’ll talk to whoever I want too, now let me go!” You hissed, pulling your arm away.

His hand slid up and grabbed the side of your throat, making your thighs feel weak. His thumb came up and rubbed your bottom lip, his eyes dark. “I think you need to know your place.”

He backed you into the janitors closet, shutting and locking the door. He turned around and crashed his lips against yours, forcing a whimper from your throat. He smirked as he backed you against the closet wall, his large body towering over yours as he lifted one of your legs and pressing his growing length against your warm center.

“You’ve been bad.” He growled.

He turned you around and pressed your face into the wall, ripping your leggings down your legs. He softly rubbed your ass, giving it a harsh spank that made you jolt. You could feel your arousal beginning to soak your panties as another slap was landed to your ass, harder this time. You felt him move your panties to the slide, one of his slender fingers running along your slit. “Does pissing me off turn you on?” He asked, landing a harder spank to your ass. “Or is it me punishing you? You don’t fucking deserve foreplay.”

You felt the tip of his length run along your slit, before he pushed into you, your pussy screaming as he shoved himself up to the hilt inside of you. You bit down on your hand as he began to slam his hips into yours, not giving you even a second to adjust. You could tell Hyunjin was pissed; as he viewed oral as an art and could spend HOURS on end getting you off on just his tongue and fingers. But now, he was pounding into you so harshly, his fingers bruising your hips as you bit your hand to keep yourself from screaming. It hurt, but felt so amazing at the same time, the way his length was brushing your gspot and stretching your walls with every furious thrust of his hips. Your eyes were shut tight, euphoria making your body shake as he pounded into you harshly.

“Hy-Hyunjin-” You whimpered, earning a hard slap to your ass.

“Don’t fucking talk.” He growled.

Loud slapping sounds began to fill the closet, and you prayed now one could hear. He lifted one of your legs up, slamming deeping into you, making choked whimpers leave your lips as his tip was slamming into your cervix. His length was sliding in and out of your battered pussy with ease as your arousal and his precum soaked your insides, and you felt him begin to lose rhythm. Hyunjin grunted as you clenched around him, your nails digging into the wall as you felt him twitch inside of you, his warmth beginning to fill you. Your eyes were rolled back, thighs twitching as he thrusted deeply into you, rough pants leaving his lips as he slowly his hips down. He pulled out and pushed your panties over your abused pussy, his lips grazing your ear. 

“Don’t make a mess.” He growled, situating himself before stepping out of the closet.

You slowly followed him out, making eye contact with someone you didn’t want too; Chani. He eyed you and Hyunjin and then smirked, walking right past you both. You bit your lip and walked away from Hyunjin quickly, hearing him beginning to catch up to you.

“Seriously?” He asked in a hiss. “You're upset because he saw that?”

“So what if I am?! No one needs to know that kind of stuff!” You yelled.

Hyunjin scoffed, rolling his eyes. “He’s not a good person, Y/N.”

“And you’re much better?” You asked, your voice cracking. “You don’t even treat me like a person, you treat me like an object!”

Hyunjin’s expression fell, shock in his eyes.m”Y/N !-”

“Don’t!” You yelled, tears slipping from your eyes. “You just treat me like a fuck toy, and I’m sick of it! Don’t talk to me anymore Hwang Hyunjin, I hate you!” You hurried down the hallway, running out of the doors and towards your apartment. Your heart felt like it was shattering in your chest, your breathing rough and ragged as you began to feel the urge to throw up from crying so hard. When you got home, you sat in the bathtub to wash all of Hyunjin off of you and out of you. Your knees were to your chest, your face buried into your arms as you sobbed into them. Why did you have to fall for him? Why did he have to treat you like that? You shouldn’t have said you hated him- because you didn’t. You just hated how you believed he viewed you, you hated the way you felt about him… But- you couldn’t hate him.

Xxxx

“That’ll be $5.50 please.” You said to your last customer after handing him his bubble tea.

He gave you the money and a soft smile before leaving, and you knew it was because you looked terrible. You had skipped school the past two days, telling your professors you weren’t feeling well, and they felt bad enough to just send you everything online. In all reality- you were heartbroken. Hyunjin didn’t check up on you, and you began to feel guilty for yelling at him and telling him that you hated him, especially when your mind stopped reeling and you thought of his facial expression. He had looked so broken when you said it, his eyes full of disbelief and sadness. But could you truly blame yourself? He acted as if he owned you, and you weren’t even dating!

“Long time no see.” A deep voice rumbled.

Your eyes shot up and you saw Chani, his dark eyes full of amusement as he looked down at you.

“Oh, hi Chani.” You greeted him with a weak smile.

“You haven’t been to school, are you okay?” He asked.

“Yeah, I just needed time to myself.” You said. “Do you need anything?”

“A mango boba please.” He said with a smile.

You rang him up and cleaned up around him as he drank his drink, and you realized he smelt like alcohol- badly. His eyes were glassy and the way he eyed you made you feel weird. After you finished, he walked out with you, his eyes constantly on you as he walked with you. Was he walking you home?

“You shouldn’t be walking all alone this late at night.” He said.

You looked at him in confusion, then your heart sank as he backed you into the wall. His dark eyes were on yours, a smirk on his face.

“Chani-”

His lips pressed into yours, and you squealed, pushing against his chest and pushing him away. His eyes narrowed as he tried again, but your hand landed on his face, shoving his jaw away.

“So you’re a little fucking whore for him but not for me?” He asked, grabbing your arm.

You shoved him off and ran past him, tears streaming down your cheeks. He went to go after you, when a large hand grabbed his shoulder and spun him around, a fist connecting with his cheek.

“I told you to back off, don’t fucking talk to her like that.” Hyunjin growled.

Chani scoffed, wiping his lips and smirking as he looked at Hyunjin. “You made a big mistake Hwang.” And then, all Hell broke loose.

XXX

You caught your breath, finally, while sitting on your couch, hugging your knees. You were quite traumatized from the whole experience. Chani was always such a good guy, how the fuck was he like that? Hyunjin was right, you were sad to think. Maybe he was really just trying to protect you, and you yelled at him. A sudden knock made you lift your head, and you wiped your eyes on your long sleeve sweater as you stood up to open the door, thinking it was Yeji, and that she had just forgotten her keys, as usual.

You opened the door and your breath was caught in your throat at the sight. Hyunjin was leaning against the door frame, his clothes ripped up and tattered, his lips busted and bleeding. His eye was black and blew, a deep gash through his eyebrow and along his cheek bone.

“Hyunjin!” You gasped as he stepped forward, his head dropping on your shoulder, weight fully against your body.

You helped him to your couch, sitting him down and cupping his cheeks. His hand came up to yours, his dull eyes meeting yours.

“What happened?” You asked, tears pricking your eyes.

“I saw what he did to you.” He whispered, his voice hoarse.

Tears began to slip down from your eyes, your arms pulling him into you as you held him. His head rested on your shoulder, his hands gently wrapped around you. Small sobs left your lips as you buried your face into his dark locks, his familiar smell comforting you.

“Why would you do that? You’re hurt!” You sobbed.

He pulled away from you and cupped your cheeks, clearing his throat.

“Because, Y/N, you’re not an object to me. I-I care about you a lot, and I wasn’t going to let him talk to you like that.” He said, his eyes gentle. “I’m so sorry for how I acted, I’m so sorry for making you cry. Please, please forgive me.”

His thumbs gently wiped your tears, your hands clutching his ripped up leather jacket tightly. He pulled you into his lap, his hands gently running up and down your back as you sat in his arms. The beating of his heart began to calm your nerves, your shaky hands still clutching his jacket. Your eyes were closed, your face buried into his chest as he gently rocked you. When you began to calm down, he pulled away, his hand gently touching your cheek.

“I don’t expect you to forgive me, and I know you probably don’t feel the same but… I love you. And I have for a while.” He confessed.

Your heart began to pound wildly at his confession, at the words you had been dying to hear. Hyunjin really loved you? He was being serious?

“I-It’s okay if you don’t feel the same.” He said softly, noticing your expression hadn’t changed. “I understand I was a jerk and I suck but-” He was cut off by a small giggle, your eyes brimming with happy tears.

“Just kiss me, idiot.” You said with a smile.

He smiled big, pulling you in by the collar of your shirt and pressing his plump lips to yours. You slightly cringed at the taste of blood from the cut on his lip, but kissed him back anyways. The kiss felt different, his touch felt different- everything felt different. It was all full of passion, full of love.

“I love you.” He whispered when he pulled away.

“I love you too, Hwang Hyunjin.” You whispered back.

He smiled then went to kiss you again, but you put your finger to his mouth. “Let’s get you cleaned up first.”

Your hands were gentle as they gently glided through Hyunjin’s dark hair, his eyes closed as he laid on your chest. You had patched him up, and he was now laying in your bed on top of you as he rested. His thumb gently rubbed your arm as he began to drift off to sleep, a small smile on his face as he basked in your warmth and scent. It was crazy, really. You never thought you’d fall in love with the man you couldn’t stand from the day you met him. But life was full of surprises, and you couldn’t wait to experience them with the man who was your first, and hopefully your last, love. 

[laurensprentiss]

Jouska [Hotch x Reader]

Chapter 17:

Warnings: None, really. Mentions of painkillers, more fluff. Emily Easter egg. HUGE plot twist at the end... this is the beginning of the end for these two. Sorry!

———

Virginian weather is notoriously unpredictable.

It’s why you get stuck in a downpour by the time you get back to your apartment. Hotch opens the car door for you and as you attempt to run inside, he pulls you in close by your arms, huddling close to you as the rain hits your skin.

You shriek over the sound of the thunder. “What are you doing?! It’s pouring down, let’s go!” You tell him, fighting to keep your eyes open.

“Do you remember the day we moved you back into your apartment?” He asks over the sound of rain. You pull away, attempting to go inside but he holds you close. “Do you remember?”

“Yeah, why?”

“It was raining like this on that day, too. Do you remember?”

You laugh. “Yes! Can we go inside now?”

His eyes soften. “I remember looking down at you from that window,” he points upstairs. “And thinking you were so beautiful. I knew even then that you were going to be a massive part of my life.”

You blink at him through the rain, heart warming at his sincere words.

He wipes the water from your cheeks and pulls you in for a kiss, and as soon as his lips touch yours, you forget all about the way your clothes stick to your skin and how uncomfortably cold you are. He ignites more than enough warmth within you. His kisses are slow, deliberate, and you can’t help but reach for his shoulders to keep you steady.

His forehead touches yours when he breaks the kiss.

“What was that for?” You ask.

Because I love you.

He shrugs. “What? I can’t kiss my girl?”

Your breath hitches.

His girl?

The tone in his voice makes your heart flutter. Makes it easy to see yourself falling even deeper for him, to see something worth having with him. You know in your soul that this moment, here and now, is one you’ll carry for the rest of your life.

———

He promises he’ll call you from work as he leaves, finding it impossible to tear himself away from you.

His forehead rests against yours and he holds you flush to him, arms around your waist when he mumbles, “I wish I didn’t have to work. But Barnes says he needs to discuss something with me.”

He’s still reeling from his earlier realisation, the prospect of telling you just how much he feels for you is terrifying and exhilarating in equal measures.

Because maybe, just maybe, you feel the same.

You interrupt his thoughts. “It’s okay, really! I have to go see Em anyway, she got discharged today so I thought I’d bring her some lunch.”

“Sure?”

“I’m sure.” You reply.

He hums, snaking his arms around your waist. “Tomorrow night,” He begins, kissing your neck. “I am going to take you on a real date.”

“Oh yeah?” You reply, wrapping your arms around his neck, carding your fingers through the hair on the back of his head.

“Mhm. 8pm.” He continues, travelling up towards your earlobe. “Flowers, nice restaurant, dinner, drinks. The works.”

“And why would you do that?” You chuckle.

Because he’s fast coming to realize that he can’t not tell you how he feels anymore.

He allows himself the grace of knowing that maybe you’ll need more time to reciprocate the extent of his feelings, but he’s okay with that. As long as he gets to say the words that have been heavy on his chest for a long time.

“Because you deserve nothing but the best. This feels special.” It feels like the beginning of the rest of his life, he thinks. “I wanna do this right.”

Your heart flutters. “Then let’s do this right.” You reply with a small smile.

You tilt his head to capture his lips between yours, his lips soft and warm, the two of you seemingly falling into a quick rhythm. His hands travel down your back to grab a handful of your ass as he deepens the kiss, his tongue licking into your mouth.

You already know where this is going with the telltale pool of warmth in your belly. He swallows your whimpers as you push him off you gently, the both of you panting a little for breath.

He chuckles breathlessly against your lips, eyes still closed. “I’m gonna go before-”

“-Yeah.”

The door is almost closed behind him before he pulls you back to him, planting another tender kiss against your lips before taking off.

You’re left bewildered, the ghost touch of his lips on yours still lingering. You giggle to yourself, hating the noise you just made but you can’t even find it in you to care.

You pack up lunch into a Tupperware, stop off at a french bakery to pick up some fresh bread and Emily’s favourite macarons before making the drive to Ambassador Prentiss’ estate.

You enter through the North entrance, bidding a quick hello to Tom, the on duty guard. You knock on Emily’s door, entering anyway when there’s no reply. There’s wincing coming from her bathroom so you drop the bags on the ottoman beside her bed and rush in to where she’s trying to adjust her sling.

“Here, let me help.” You pull the strap taught against her.

She sighs in relief. “Thanks. I just couldn’t reach it.”

“How do you feel?” You ask, leading her to sit on her bed. Her bruises are still angry and blue, but the split lip seems to be healing and her eye’s opening a little better now.

“Been better. The painkillers are wearing off though, stuff’s good.” She laments.

“Yeah, tell me about it.” You mutter, handing her a sandwich and some soup once she’s situated. Her face lights up when she sees the macarons you put on her vanity. “You take your other meds?”

“No.”

You look around her bedroom for the bottles when she motions over to her nightstand. “How about you? How do you feel?” She asks, taking the pills and some water from you.

“Still sore, I guess.” You take a seat opposite her on her bed, crossing your legs on her comforter. “These bruises aren’t going away though.” You peer at yourself through the mirror, tracing the handprints on your neck.

She watches you expectantly.

“...What? Why are you looking at me like that?”

She takes a bite of her sandwich with her good hand, and mumbles through her food, “I’m sorry, I guess I just don’t know why you’re traipsing through here acting like you didn't just sleep with your bodyguard.”

You flinch. “Lower your voice! If your mother hears, I swear to God…”

“She’s in the South wing - in her office. Spill.”

“Spill what? Where do I start?”

“Oh shut up, I can tell you’re dying to tell me! How did it happen?”

You concede and shuffle in closer, “Well. He dropped me off home and I guess we were both just waiting for the other to say something - but neither of us did.”

“So how did you end up-”

“Don’t interrupt.” She holds her hands up defensively. “He hugged me goodbye and left but I caught him as he was leaving in the hallway. I told him I didn’t want him to leave.”

She clutches her chest. “Then what?”

“I don’t know... next thing I know he’s kissing me and… well, you know the rest.” You tell her coyly.

She narrows her eyes. “How was he?”

“Honestly?” She nods excitedly. “Amazing.” You breathe. “Literally the best I’ve ever had, you don’t understand Em, his hands?”

Her eyes widen in glee. “Stop it!”

You continue talking while you eat lunch together, realising it’s the first time you’ve talked without a looming threat since she returned from Rome. You feel the lightest you’ve felt in a long time, hopeful even.

Your mind wanders to Hotch.

Being in his arms feels safe, it always has. From the day you met, he’s been by your side, been the person who had your back through the worst year of your life.

And now you had him.

You actually had him.

Emily notices the faraway, blissful look on your face. Thinks she hasn’t ever seen you like this. You were kidnapped almost a week ago and she almost died but you still look the happiest she’s seen you in years.

Her room telephone rings then, and when she sees the number, she rolls her eyes. “Yes Mother?” She asks bluntly. “No, Mother, I haven’t. We’re having lunch... Yes she’s here.” Your ears perk up. “... No, I haven’t asked her yet… Yes! Okay fine, I will. Goodbye.”

Your ears perk up, “What do you need to ask me?”

She sighs. “Well… Mother has an assignment in Rome. She’s flying out tomorrow morning - and I’m going with her.”

Your heart sinks. “Do you have to go? It’s so nice having you back, I thought maybe you’d stick around for a while.”

“I don’t have to go. But I want to.” She winces as she climbs on top of her bed again. “Since the accident, she’s been a lot less ‘Ambassador Prentiss’ and a lot more ‘Mom.’ I think she may want to make up for the last time and maybe it’ll be different now.”

“Hey.” You grab her hand to stop her picking her cuticles raw. “What happened in Rome? I was busy with school and everything but I remember things were never really the same after that.”

She sighs. “Another day. I promise. But I think I’d like to recuperate there, maybe travel for a couple of months before I figure out my next steps.” You see the hope in her eyes. “Mother and I would love it if you joined us - that’s what I needed to ask.”

“Wow.” You breathe. “That’s a lot to take in. I’m happy for you and your mom, I mean I’m sorry it took a near-death accident, but I’m happy for you.” She scoffs as you squeeze her hand. “And I’d love to come with you, I really would. I loved Italy as a child but - I think I have some things to work out here.”

She grins. “Yeah? Like what?”

“Like a date tomorrow night.”

“That’s amazing, love. I’m happy for you, you know? You deserve this.” She cradles your face. “But if you do change your mind, we’re flying out of this airfield at 9am.” She scribbles some details on a notepad and tucks the paper into your pocket. “Just in case.”

———

“Hey, sweetheart, sorry I didn’t call. Can you meet me at my place in an hour? I have some great news.” You peer at your phone, the screen obscured by the fast emerging sunlight after the earlier thunderstorm.

You place a hand over the screen to block some light out when a hand taps you on the shoulder.

It’s base instinct at this point, a year-long stalker will do that to you, but you gasp and drop your phone behind you. Before you’ve had a chance to retrieve it, a woman outstretches her hand with your phone in it.

“Sorry! I didn’t mean to scare you,” the blonde explains defensively. You get a better look at her. She looks wide-eyed and a little skittish, but she seems nice enough.

“That’s alright - thanks.” You reply, taking your phone from her. “Do I know you?”

She wrings her hands nervously. “No, I don’t think so. But I know you, I saw you on the news and in the papers. I was wondering if we could talk.”

You pull your bag further up your shoulders. “What are you? A reporter or something?”

“No! No, no. I’m actually - you know Aaron right?”

You frown. “Yeah?”

She stumbles over her words like she’s unsure of what to say. She takes a moment and you can see the gears turning in her head as she formulates the words in her head.

“I’m Haley.”

———

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[hpalways]

Yaksha’s Destiny || Xiao

DARKNESS was the biggest fear held by fellow Yakshas. This power bestowed upon you and many alike gave an opening to the pitting shadows that raged within your chambers. Some days, it wasn't as bad -- other days... it felt like you were getting ripped apart into shreds, taking in all your willpower to battle against it. It was tempting, to give in and call it quits. Life for a Yaksha wasn't all sunshine and rainbows. There were always too many demons and not enough heroes. Especially for a weaker one like you, anger and frustration would stem from these battles, only to eat at you later on. 

Today was one of those days. The sky was a stormy sea of clouds, with the Gods crying from the heaven above. Droplets prickled down your bare skin, cold to the touch. While in the mountainside, you had stumbled upon demonic energy, so there was no choice but to finish them off. 

Dodging the monster that lunged at you, you took out your polearm. The hydro vision on your hip gleamed brightly in the setting. Taking a turn, you could feel power surge to your arms. As you were about to jab your weapon into the demon's abdomen, they had ducked in time. Shit. You had underestimated this one.

Its body rammed into you, knocking you off your feet. Air left your system, causing you to groan in pain. Just as it was about to sink its teeth into your arm, you rolled over on one side and jumped back to your feet. Fingers clenching tightly around the metal stick, you pushed your hind legs and tried to stab at it another time. Your speed and reaction time was too slow. Too damn slow. Too damn weak. Gritting your teeth, you began to use up more of Yaksha's power, drinking the exhilarating taste of freedom. It was so addicting... often times, you'd wished it'd never stop. 

A burst of water shrouded from the weapon, circling the demon until it was surrounded. With one, clean fell swoop, you sliced the demon and the energy faded away. The deed was done. 

Falling to your knees, your entire body was shaking. Face contorted and in pain, nails dug into the earth to feel wet mud. Your body would not move -- it could not. Stilling there as if you had just been paralyzed, hungering thoughts plagued your mind... Thoughts you wished weren't yours. Letting out a disgusting whimper, similar to that of a wounded animal, you bit down on your lip, hard. Blood dribbled down your chin, painting the grass in crimson. Tugging at your mask, you stared at it for a moment. A sigh let out. 

That was a close one. Crashing to the ground, your chest heaved up and down in exhaustion. 

A figure suddenly entered your peripheral vision. Climbing up to the ridge of the mountain was Xiao, his dark teal locks blowing along with the harsh winds. Donned in his usual robes, he was as attractive as ever. The first time you stumbled upon him -- one of the famous five -- you nearly forgot to breathe. You had referred to him as Alatus then, starstrucked by such a powerful being. 

You would never not awed by him. The way he held himself would always come to remind you of the big gap in strength between the two of you. Maybe you did establish a relationship with this all-mighty Yaksha, but this inferiority complex was tugging your strings more than you'd like to admit. 

At the same time, he provided you the distraction needed. He kept you grounded, which prevented you from going mad. He was the only one who made you feel human, if that was even possible. 

Golden amber hues landed on you, withholding an unreadable expression. He walked up to your beaten up form and sat down, unbothered by the rain. Struggling to get yourself into a sitting position, you looked out at the view in front. 

"You used up too much of your power again," he murmured. 

"Do you think I don't know that? I had no choice," you sighed. 

His sharp eyes narrowed further. "You were being careless."

"It happened. There's nothing I can do to change it." His anger barely dwindled and the scowl only deepened. "Come on, Xiao. I don't want to talk about my mistakes when I'm with you. Busy as we are, I barely get to see you as of late. Can't we just enjoy our brief time together?"

That got him. His eyes softened at your words and he reluctantly nodded in agreement. Seizing the victory, you laid your head on his shoulder, feeling warmth even upon this cold weather. The rain was starting to let down too -- perhaps Xiao was the lucky charm.

"What have you been up to?" you inquired. 

"Demons. Monsters. The usual," he responded. His cheeks tinged with a soft pink all of a sudden. "I... I also got you something."

Your ears perked up at the sound of this. Lifting your head, you watched him in curiosity. He took something out from his robe pockets and slowly opened his palm. Laying there was a blue, glowing object. Shaped as a butterfly, it was gorgeous. You had never seen this kind of butterfly around these parts. He must have traveled far to have found it. 

"It's a crystalfly," he mumbled, averting his eyes in embarrassment. Your heart raced at his actions. He was too cute. Before meeting him, you could have never imagined the Vigilant Yaksha to possess such qualities. "I saw it and... thought it would look good in your hair."

"Oh, I love it. Thank you," you whispered breathlessly, touched beyond words. This was exactly what you meant with how Xiao could easily brush your problems away with a smile.

Before you could stop yourself, you leaned in and kissed his lips. They were soft as petal leaves. He returned the gesture immediately, arms wrapped around you in a warm embrace. Digging your fingers into his hair, you kissed with a ferocity that was never present in your fights. This was to release the pain you dealt with today. As long Xiao was here, you were going to be okay. As long as he was by your side, you were going to be okay. This era of demons and gods will end someday, leaving you a happy future with him. 

You tasted him. His lips. His mouth. His entire self. He tasted of mint. He tasted of life. He tasted of iron. The kind of metal tang found in blood. Sighs were exchanged upon each kiss, breathless but the two of you would not let the other go. Your lips trailed down to his jaw, peppering his baby-soft skin with a few nibbles here and there. He let out a gasp. 

Finally you pulled away, giggling at his flustered state for your bold moves. 

The end was nearing. He picked up the crystal fly and reached up to your [h/c] hair. While he gently pinned it down, you could only focus on his swollen lips. He was beautiful... and you loved him so. 

"[Y/N]," he said, interrupting the honey silence of the mountains. "If you are ever in trouble, just call my name and I will come to you. In any circumstance, avoid overusing your power."

This bliss that left you giddy disappeared as quick as it came. All that remained was the harsh, cruel reality. Brows knitted together in offense and you quickly shook your head. "Why would I do that? I'm a Yaksha. What kind of Yaksha seeks help from another? This wounds my pride, Xiao. Is your faith in my skill and strength that low?"

"No. That's not it," he argued, features twisted in desperation. "Why won't you let me protect you?"

"Unbelievable," you merely scoffed, staggering up to stand. "I have to go. I'm sure you do too."

Ignoring his blubbering protests, you jumped down upon ledges until you reached ground level safely. He didn't understand what you had to go through. He never had to face judgement from those who didn't believe in you. Strong enough to battle the demons both externally and internally, Xiao was different from you. But even so... even if his words meant that he only cared for you, it hurt like you had been just stabbed. 

You were willing to prove to him that you could stand on your own feet. He was going to eat his own words. So would the other Yakshas who looked down on you your entire life. If you trained hard enough, surely improvement could be gained. Right? It wasn't as if destiny could determine what you could accomplish already. 

Approaching the forest that was said to contain many strong demons and monsters, you surged ahead, with eyes filled of challenge. 

There, sitting in a nook was a cave, Sensing a suffocating presence, you knew you had hit a jackpot. Sneaking across the grassy lands, you stayed silent. The tall, towering trees were beginning to look a lot more ominous. Tiptoeing to the edge of the cave, you peered in to find the energy unbearably strong. One staggering breath later and you went forward. A roar let out, signaling that it knew of its intruder. Shoulders tensed up and sweat beaded your forehead, but you couldn't stop now. No matter what, you were going to go through with it. 

It was a beast. Fangs gleamed in the darkness, nearly the size of your weapon. Having woken from its slumber, its terrifying eyes landed on you. Claws swiped the air, which you barely avoided in time. Fear had seized you with a hand, choking you until you could barely move. This was a terrible, foolish move. There was no way you could beat such a demon. 

Calling in more power, it filled you up at the core. To waste no time, you delved right into battle, slashing at the monster. It had little to none effect on it. With a lazy swipe of its arm, it slammed you right into the cave's walls, causing you to spit out blood. Pushing yourself up, you tried again, putting in more power to your weapon. Adding hydro to the mix, the weapon hit its arms. It caused the monster to roar in pain, but that only made it more angry. Barreling straight to you, similar but much more frightening than the last demon, it pounced on you, pinning you down to the ground. 

Drool left its mouth, splattering all over on your face. Its claws dug into your side and you let out a piercing scream. You were so fucking sick of this shit. Why was it destined that you had to stay weak? It was so unfair you wished to cry your heart out. 

The last of the powers was used. Pushing the demon's hold on you, you stumbled up and felt thrill run through. It was delicious, but your mind was also beginning to grow hazy. "X-Xiao..." you uttered out. 

The Conqueror of Demons arrived as soon as you called, anxious to apologize for his insensitivity. What he didn't expect to see was a battlefield. A large and strong demon was torn apart to pieces, the iron smell of it so strong, it was gagworthy. Sitting on the pile of bones was you, dark, gruesome scratches decorating your arms and legs. A deep gash was bleeding from your torso and your [e/c] eyes were dimmed; at the same time, they held a crazed look in them. 

His face paled and his body grew cold at the sight. You did the thing he last wanted to happen. Already too far in and consumed by the darkness surrounding your whole life, you were looking at him not with love, but with bloodlust. "I'll kill you, Xiao!" you screamed at the top of your lungs. 

Climbing down, you tried to run to him. But your footsteps halted and you crashed to the ground. Spazzing out as if you had just been electrocuted by lightning, the Vigilant Yaksha slowly approached you, tears streaming down the side of his face. He kneeled down, cradling your head in his lap. "Don't leave me..." He hit the ground in fury. "Dammit! Why didn't you listen to me!?"

Consciousness returned but you were on the brink of death. The wound was deep, but so were the demons. It was raining again, so you forced a small smile out. "I'm weak. It's my fate," you whispered. "At least I won't have to suffer through this darkness any longer. It's over. I quit. You won, my demons. I am yours to keep."

"Shut your mouth," he snarled. The rain had turned into a storm, adding fury into the mix. "Please. You can make it through this. Don't leave me yet. It was going to get better. An era with no more demons to haunt us. You said so yourself." 

"That was just a stupid dream."

"Don't fucking say that," he growled, flinching as if he'd just been slapped. You were supposed to be the optimist here. It meant that this death was real... and that you would accept it with open arms. "It's going to happen. So hold on. Let me find someone to save you."

Your head shook and you winced. "We all learned this since young. We'll die if we let our power consume us. It's impossible and you know it."

"Stop," he choked out, lowering his head until his hair covered his broken expression. "Then don't talk. Save your breath."

You ignored his words. "Thank you... for the crystalfly. Does it look pretty on me?" you murmured.

He heaved out a sob and slowly nodded. "I've never seen anyone more beautiful."

"I love you."

"I love you too."

"And I'm sorry."

"I am too."

"Protect... the people... like you always do, my sweet, Vigilant Yaksha." Your voice grew more raspy by the second, for the pain was getting unbearable. 

You fluttered your eyes shut and the pain faded. On the other hand, Xiao's pain grew, the scars and trauma there to haunt him, for a life and infinity.

[seanfalco]

Next Time, Lock the Door | Vincent Rhodes x Reader

Word Count: 1.6k a/n: I ended up combining three different prompts. Takes place directly after Get Warm. Prompts: To make one muse watch the other masturbate + Vincent smut in general but also mayhaps getting caught + I wish you would write a fic where Vincent and reader/oc take things to the next level. Requested by: @badsext & Anonymous

It had only been a couple days since Vincent had spent the night with you, warming up after getting caught in the rain and ending up in your bed.

Your cheeks warmed as you found yourself thinking about it again, unable to get the event from your mind no matter how you tried. Even during your therapy session that morning Dr. Rose had noticed how distracted you were. It seemed the only way to get Vincent out of your head was to see him.

Having the rest of the afternoon free, you decided to surprise him.

When you got to his and Alex’s room, you could hear the faint sound of Bach playing within and you tapped softly on the door. When there was no response you tried the handle, finding it unlocked.

Shutting the door quietly behind you, you slipped your shoes off, per Alex’s rules, when another sound, half masked by the classical music caught your ears. Making your way further, into the room you soon found the source of the sound.

Laid back on his bed, one arm draped over his face, you found Vincent, pants undone and cock in hand, your name on his lips and you felt your face flood with heat. Watching for a moment, the way his hand pumped over his length and the way he squirmed atop the bed, you bit your lip, arousal swiftly pooling between your legs at the sight of him pleasuring himself, clearly thinking of you as he did so.

“Oh, [y/n]...”

“Would you like some help with that?”

With a startled cry at your words, Vincent’s eyes flew open and he hastily yanked the sheets up in an attempt to cover himself as he swore loudly, ticcing in his surprise.

“[y/n]?” he asked once he realized it was only you standing there and he collapsed back with a sigh, still twitching slightly.

“I’m sorry V, I didn’t mean to startle you,” you exclaimed ruefully, lowering yourself to the edge of his bed. “I wanted to surprise you, and the door was unlocked…”

“I knew I was forgetting something…” Vincent muttered, shaking his head before peering sheepishly up at you through the springy curls that had fallen into his eyes. “I’m sorry you had to see that.”

“I’m not,” you admitted, your gaze traveling down his body. “I couldn’t stop thinking about the other night, and it looks like you couldn’t either.”

The unmistakable flush suffusing his face was your answer. Slowly pulling the sheet back, you wet your lips as you reached down to stroke him. Gently gripping his length, his cock twitched eagerly at your touch and a choked moan left Vincent’s lips.

“Does that feel good?” you asked, your own lips curling at each desperate sound you pulled from him.

“Yes!” Vincent gasped, forcing his eyes open to look up at you. “Fuck me faster! FUCK!  FUCKING CUNT!” he ticced abruptly, his body tensing and jerking.

Not giving him enough time for embarrassment to take hold, you leaned in to kiss him, capturing his lips. “My cunt, is that what you want?” you whispered with a smirk, relishing the way his green eyes widened, his mouth falling open with a silent groan.

Clearing his throat, he nodded and you stood, unbuttoning your jeans to let them fall to the floor with your panties before you straddled him, pulling the sheet up around you to cover your bodies somewhat.

“Are you ready?” you breathed, rolling your hips to grind against him.

“Mhmm,” Vincent hummed, slowly running his hands up your thighs and over your hips.

“Feel good?” you asked, watching his expression.

“Yes!” he gasped, his chest heaving.

Smiling, you reached between you, gently guiding him to your folds, slowly easing onto him, letting him fill you inch by inch til you’d sheathed him completely. “Oh, [y/n],” Vincent moaned, his mouth falling open as you moved, slowly rolling your hips with him inside you, grinding lazily against his pelvis.

“You’re so-you’re so beautiful,” he whispered and you grinned, pulling your shirt over your head so he could see more of you, guiding his hands to your breasts. You loved that you never felt the need to hide when he looked at you.

“So are you,” you murmured, a soft moan escaping your lips. “Are you nervous?” you asked, noticing the way he tensed every so often, a focused look crossing his face.

“A little…” Vincent admitted sheepishly.

“We just did this the other night,” you gently pointed out.

“I know,” he said, glancing down, his hands tightening on your waist.

“V, talk to me,” you murmured, pausing to lay down atop him, pushing a stray curl from his forehead. “I don’t wanna… mess this up,” he admitted quietly, swallowing, his eyes darting away.

“What do you mean?” you asked, tracing the slope of his nose with the tip of your finger.

“I don’t wanna ruin th’moment if I tic,” he answered with a sigh.

“One, even if you were to tic, you wouldn’t ruin anything,” you assured him, kissing his neck in between words. “And two, you didn’t have any trouble the other night. The more you tense up and worry about it, the more likely you are to tic,” you soothed. “So, just relax and focus on me.”

Vincent’s eyes roamed your face as he took a deep breath. “I can do that.”

“Good,” you purred, kissing him deeply as you began to move again and soon he was lost in you, guiding your hips eagerly as he writhed beneath you, his anxiety falling away with each desperate moan.

“I’m close, V,” you gasped. “I want you on top,” you admitted and you rolled off him to switch places, Vincent sliding between your legs almost confidently, surprising you with the power behind his thrusts.

He didn’t speak much, but his eyes never left your face, those emerald pools you could get lost in, each soft moan and whimper, soothing. It had never been so easy to lose yourself in something.

Though he’d seemed to gain more confidence, he was gentle, kissing you tenderly in between deep groans of bliss, your own pleasure rolling through you with each movement. “V, I’m close, please don’t stop,” you begged with a gasp, your climax hovering just out of reach.

The focused look on Vincent’s face made it obvious he was desperately holding on so you could finish before him. “Oh God, yes, right there!” you cried, your voice more of a whine, but Vincent obeyed, and soon your body was tensing, warm pleasure sweeping over you, everything else falling away.

Before you could encourage him to come, Vincent gave one last shuddering thrust before his face dropped to your shoulder, pressing into the crook of your neck as he emptied himself inside you. Breathing together, you wrapped your arms around him, playing with the curls at the nape of his neck and he fully relaxed atop you.

“Oh my God! Oh my God!” The high pitched sound of Alex’s frantic voice in the doorway pulled you to your senses and Vincent’s head jerked up, yanking the sheet up higher. “Did you just--? Are you still--? Oh God!” he cried disgustedly, grabbing the door handle to wrench the door open behind him, compulsively opening and closing it several times before pulling it open all the way and stepping back outside.

“Alex--!”

“Next time, lock the bloody door!” Alex cried before Vincent could apologize. “Ugh, the secretions! You’re gunna hafta clean everything!” you heard him exclaim through the door.

By the time you were alone again the pair of you dissolved into laughter at being caught in such a compromising position, the entire situation absurd, shaking against each other with mirth until you were laughed out, Vincent stilling atop you before sitting up.

“Can I tell you something?” he asked, sobering, his eyes not quite meeting yours as you sat up as well, worry tickling your gut.

“Of course, anything,” you murmured, resting your hand on Vincent’s arm.

“The first time I… slept with someone, I… I told her I loved her… and she didn’t… feel the same way,” he explained with a sigh. “And the first time we… you know… it was such a spur of the moment thing, I didn’t have time to be nervous, but this time…” he trailed off, shaking his head.

“That’s why you were afraid of ruining the moment,” you finished for him and he nodded. “Oh, V,” you sighed, wrapping your arms around him. “You don’t have to say anything until you’re ready.”

“But I want to,” he insisted quietly. “I like you, [y/n]. I like spending time with you. I like how you make me feel…” he huffed a heavy sigh. “I’m terrified of saying what I wanna say and scaring you off--”

“I love you too, Vincent,” you cut in, taking him by surprise and his head snapped up, his eyes seeking yours. “I feel the same way,” you assured him, threading your fingers with his and bringing his hand to your lips.

Before you knew it, his mouth was on yours, his free hand slipping behind your head as he kissed you hesitantly. “I love you so much,” he repeated, and you let go of his hand to slip your arms around him, holding him tightly.

A sharp rapping in threes came at the door, followed by Alex’s impatient voice. “Are you two almost done in there? I have to use the loo and I am not using the public toilets!”

“We better get dressed,” Vincent mumbled, though he couldn’t seem to wipe the dazed smile from his face.

“Yeah, probably,” you agreed, your own cheeks burning from grinning so widely. Sliding off the bed, you reached for your discarded clothes and quickly dressed. “Come find me later, okay?” you murmured, stealing a kiss as Vincent stood to pull up his pants.

You could feel his eyes on you as you stepped into your shoes and opened the door. “Hi Alex,” you greeted, still grinning giddily as you slipped past him.

“What was that about?” he exclaimed, turning to Vincent who was busy making his bed.

“Nothing,” he answered still smiling himself.

Rolling his eyes in exasperation, Alex shut himself in the bathroom, grumbling under his breath.

-------------------

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[shreddedparchment]

A Wife for Thor Pt.13

12/12/2020

The Honeymoon’s Not Over

Pairing: King!Thor x Reader          Word Count: 5,309

Warnings: jealousy, slight angst, light smut, language, talks of pregnancy

A/N: I’m sorry these are taking longer. My grandparents are living with me for a few months and these are going to get a little slower now that they’re here. I hope you enjoy it! If you have a favorite part, let me know what it is! I’d love to hear. If you happen to reblog, thanks so much for helping me spread my work! xoxo

Please DO NOT repost my stories on any other blogs or sites.

REBLOGS are always welcome!

Not knowing what to expect from a marriage to a veritable stranger is predictable. Of course, you’re not going to know what’s to come when you don’t know the man you’ve agreed to marry.

Apart from the responsibilities of the throne you’ve chosen to sit upon, and the obligations you have to provide the kingdom with an heir, the marriage you have chosen for yourself was entered into blindly.

You knew absolutely nothing about Thor when you agreed to marry him. You knew a little bit more by the time you stood directly opposite him and said your vows.

Now, after spending time with him in the company of his comrades, his friends, you know what Thor sounds like when he busts a gut. You see the twinkle in his one eye when they all sit around the living room reminiscing about battles won.

You see sadness over their losses, and the loyalty of his friendship. You see the weight they all carry on their shoulders to give this world its best chance against all forms of threat.

Most of all, you know how proud Thor is to have you by his side. At every moment possible, he’s pulled you into their games and conversations. He’s invited Tony to give you a tour of the compound and Bruce had tagged along and whispered to you smaller things that Tony conveniently left out because they weren’t things for him to boast about.

As the night went on, the Avengers told you their farewells and those that lived outside of the compound took their leave. They told you it was so nice to meet you, shook your hand—or hugged you as was the case with Wanda, Nat, and Steve—and then made you promise to stop by again and stay for longer than a day.

“We’ll make a real vacation of it, I assure you,” Thor promises Bucky who has taken a shine to you more enthusiastically than you thought he would.

Since you made your opinions on Loki clear, he’s been much more eager to speak with you and exchange ideas on more than just overlooking the troubled pasts of people desperate to make a change.

By one o’clock in the morning, Tony and Bruce are the only two left in the living room.

Bruce sits at the edge of the sofa, his glasses balanced at the end of his nose as he scrolls through large amounts of text and numbers on a sleek black tablet.

Tony has taken over the corner of the sectional, his phone pressed to his ear again as he yawns but resists sleep.

You hear him say Pepper’s name and a quick acknowledgement that he misses her when you decide that maybe it’s time to give them their privacy.

You rise slowly, Thor back in the main common room where you’d all eaten dinner, talking to Loki or Hilde on his own phone to keep up with what’s happening back home.

Bruce notices, not as invested in his reading as you’d thought.

“I think I’m gonna head to bed.” You admit, gesturing over your shoulder towards the other room.

“Oh, okay. Have a good night. I think Tony has breakfast set up for eight o’clock tomorrow morning so, the others will be back by then. I think?”

Bruce turns towards Tony who has his legs folded up on the seat, his hand combing through the back of his head as a sappy grin overtakes his face.

“Hey, breakfast at eight, right? Tomorrow morning?” Bruce asks, reaching over to place his hand on the seat of the sofa to attempt and get his attention.

“Hold on, Pep, there’s some weird old man trying to ask me something. I think if I ignore him long enough, he’ll leave me alone.” Tony mutters, loud enough for everyone to hear but muffled enough to make it clear that you’re not supposed to.

From the other end of the phone, you hear a clearly amused female voice speak back, “Be nice. He’s trying to be accommodating for Thor’s wife.”

He throws his hand back towards Bruce and waves his hand at him in clear dismissal.

Bruce sighs and gives you an apologetic smile, but you’re smiling from ear to ear.

“Sorry. Just to be safe, we’ll say eight o’clock.”

“Thanks, Bruce. For the tour and everything.”

“Yeah, no problem.” Bruce nods.

“Good night. Good night, Tony.” You call at him pointedly.

Tony makes a point to look back at you, fixing you with a buttery smile, “Goodnight, Cherub.”

You scoff, laughing a little, but give them a wave and move into the common room.

Thor’s back is tense, and it makes you worry.

Despite the conversation you’d overheard in the kitchen, you’re more confident now than before that Thor is devoted to you.

Because it’s in his touch. It’s in his gaze. It’s in the way he pulls you into his side when the others teased you about now being obligated to be an Avenger and the consequent terror that filled your eyes.

“A jest, my sweet.” Thor had whispered, then chuckled with the others.

He’d promised to tell you about this threat when the two of you were alone, but you’re so exhausted and as much as you want to go over and demand he fill you in now, you turn down the long hallway and pass two or three doorways before you reach the bedrooms.

The first door on the left is Thor’s and you slip in quietly, hoping not to interrupt Thor’s phone call.

It’s toasty warm inside. You peel off your clothes and despite wanting to just snuggle into bed, you make your way into the bathroom and the deep tub is long and wide enough for two people.

You flip on the shower instead, the water burning hot and as it glides down along your skin it summons goosebumps as the cold is chased away.

You hadn’t realized how chilly the compound is until now, and wonder if the Avengers are just hot natured. It would be weird for all of them to be like that, but if the ones with powers are like Thor, then maybe they all run a little hotter?

A tickle around your arms, just above your elbows, coaxes your eyes back open.

You hadn’t even realized you were falling asleep. Looking down you see two sets of large familiar fingers.

The hands they’re attached to turn you around and pull you close until Thor’s lips press down against yours, pushing you even further into peaceful bliss.

He opens his mouth wide, coaxing your own to respond as his tongue delves hungrily into your mouth.

You’re slow to respond, so tired but eager and pleased with the affection.

Thor’s knee nudges against the inner part of your thigh and you take a step, but he catches it as you do, and he lifts it up against his hip.

Water rains down along your naked bodies and Thor slides into you slowly.

You moan, low and sweet. Quiet and pleased but lazy.

“Thor…” You whimper, wrapping your arms around his shoulders as he dips down to nibble at your throat.

He pumps in and out so deliciously slow that the stretch of him pulls an orgasm from you quickly.

You’re so sensitive at the moment. You go limp in his arms, and he adjusts to support your body as you relax while he continues to push into you.

He rests your back against the shower wall, hips pulled against his as he fucks you slow. Watching him thrust into you, hips rolling slow, is perfection.

You caress the side of his face and he pulls back to look at you before he kisses you sweetly.

It all feels like a dream, and as he speeds up, you shut your eyes and you’re sent off with another wave of pleasure.

~~~~~~~~~~

The morning is toasty. Large warmth wrapped around you.

You twist where he holds you, straining to look at his face which you know like the back of your hand by now. No eyepatch, you reach up to trace the edges of his missing eye.

He croons and curls into your touch, the space gets red and itchy sometimes from wearing the patch all day.

This feeling, this soft glow in your chest, the way it aches and makes you feel like you could fly is something you didn’t know to expect from your marriage.

This iridescence, this shine that grows from your very center to entangle itself around you and Thor.

“Sleep longer,” Thor whispers, his voice deep and gravelly with sleep.

He pulls you closer, large hands splayed against your back as he rubs it several times up and down.

It almost does lure you back to sleep but you force your eyes open.

“We have to go down for breakfast. Everyone will be waiting.”

“Mmmmmm,” Thor protests.

No, he’s straight up whining. Tightening his hold, you groan as he squeezes. Any harder and he’ll crack your back.

“Thor,” You insist, and after a bit he opens his eye and peeks at your face before shutting it again.

“I do not appreciate early mornings when I am supposed to be enjoying uninterrupted time with my new wife.”

“You’re the one that brought us here!” The chuckle that slips through your lips is unintentional, but he’s so cute all pouty.

“It doesn’t matter,” He frowns, “I am King. Things should go my way.”

“Well, excuse me Your Majesty. Should I go tell the Avengers that they need to reschedule breakfast until you’re ready to wake up?”

“Yes,” When you start to move, he shoots up, tackling you to the bed and pinning your arms over your head as you laugh. “Wait, I don’t want you to leave the bed.”

“How the hell else am I supposed to go tell them then?”

“I suppose we can’t make them wait. I am so glad that we’ve still got a few days left to spend at your home. I want to make sure we go back to the palace with my child firmly planted in your womb.” He gushes and even though the words aren’t exactly dirty, it’s got your core throbbing and aching for more of what you think happened last night.

“Did we make love last night?” You really don’t know if it was just a dream or not.

It was all so sleepy, the memory like smoke. It could very well have been a wet dream.

“Don’t you remember?”

“Kinda. I was so tired.”

The amused curve of Thor’s lips give you the confirmation you need, “Yes, you were very tired. I had to catch you after your second climax. You fell asleep just as I also reached mine.”

“I don’t remember,” You confess, trying hard to remember what happened after your eyes shut.

You vaguely remember feeling supportive hands on the back of your head and back.

The soft mattress of his bed supporting you as he placed you on it?

“I’m not allowed to get drunk or to get really tired around you anymore. I hate not remembering my nights with you.”

He settles down on top of you, keeping his weight light and balanced on his side. His hands he brings down along your arms until he has his right cupping the left side of your head while his left hand finds its usual spot on your hip.

“I quite enjoy it when you can’t keep your eyes open. You sang for me on our wedding night.”

His reminder makes you groan and you turn away from him but he catches your lips in a kiss before you can turn away fully.

Thor gives you a good morning. A very good morning.

You both shuffle out into the common room where you’d had dinner last night with wide smiles, playful chuckling, and completely satisfied.

Both of you are so into what the other is saying or doing with their hands that you don’t really hear the murmur of conversation by the long table.

“When we get back, we should break in that bench in your backyard.” Thor whispers.

“Are you joking? That thing is gonna leave so many marks on my body. No way.”

“Come on, I’ll put a blanket, and you can be on top.” He presses his lips right up against your ear as he seduces you, but you’re stronger than that...maybe.

“Mmm, that’s really tempting there, Your Majesty,” you tease, reaching up to tug on his ear until he meets your lips in a quick peck.

It’s noisy and it smacks. So loud in fact, that you two finally notice the way the murmur of voices has disappeared and turned into silence.

Both of you stop, searching ahead for what might have caused the sudden death of conversation and at first don’t see anything.

Well, you don’t see anything.

“Good morning, everyone. What’s-is everything okay?” You ask, finding Steve’s face as he stands with his arms crossed across his chest, looking at you and Thor with his chin tucked in a bit.

He looks pensive and worried.

A quick look at Natasha and Wanda tells you that they’re worried for you for some reason. Both of them sitting at the edge of their seats.

Beside you, Thor has gone stiff.

“Thor?” You look at him, not sure why and search his face to see if there might be a clue but his eye is lasered in across the room and you follow his gaze.

You’re still not quite certain what he sees until movement on the furthest seat of the table draws your attention to a small brunette, with peachy skin, rosy cheeks, and bright brown eyes.

She’s so nervous that she’s almost clumsy, pushing her long hair over her shoulder, her lips quivering into a smile and then back into a straight line several times before they settle into a teeny uncertain curve of her lips.

Pink lips. Not chapped. Perfectly proportioned so that both lips are the exact same thickness.

“Jane…” Thor says, almost like it’s a realization.

“Oh,” Your voice is more timid than you expected it to come out if you ever came face to face with this woman. “That’s Jane.”

You’re suddenly really sad you never Googled her so that you’d at least have been prepared for the absolute petite beauty that she is.

Thor’s head whips towards you and he blinks, mouth opening as he searches for the words.

“I-we-er-I mean...This-this is my wife,” He introduces you breathlessly.

Clearly seeing her has caught him by as much surprise as you. Maybe more.

“Queen of Asgard,” he gives her your full name.

In Asgardian tradition, since Thor doesn’t technically have a last name in the traditional sense like humans do, you’ve kept your own.

“Right,” Jane shuts her eyes, claps her hands gently then nods slowly. “Right, of course. You’re King now! RIght. Your Majesties.”

Her greeting is simple and she even gives a quick somewhat off balance curtsy, probably from her nerves.

“Oh, that’s-”

Thor takes your hand, pulling you just a smidge more into his side, cutting off your protest to her curtsy.

“Thank you for that,” Thor tells her, nodding once. “None of these rascals bothered to bow to my new Queen.”

There’s something odd about Thor’s voice that you’ve never heard before. An anger. Subdued rage. Surprise too. His own sprinkle of nerves thrown in there as well.

You steal a glance up at his face and find a tightness around his eyes as he then drops your hand to slip it around your shoulders.

“What are you doing here?” He asks her, and the Avengers take this as their cue to rise from their spots and move into the living room or the kitchen.

Jane comes around the table, stopping a few feet away from the two of you.

Their eyes are locked on each other, her pretty browns and Thor’s one electric blue.

The silence, though it lasts only a quick three seconds, is endless. Instantly you’re an intruder and you spot Bruce peeking from the kitchen. He makes eye contact with you and there’s a beckoning from him, a promise of safety and sanctuary in this super fucked situation you find yourself in and you pull out from Thor’s arm and nearly scamper into the kitchen but a large hand wraps around your wrist gently, pulling to stop you from moving.

“Where are you going?” Thor’s face has softened, all tension leaving his beautiful face as he steps towards you to close the distance between your bodies.

It’s still respectful, a good two feet between you as opposed to the narrow six inches he’s kept you in all week.

Something tells you that he’s also keeping you at arms’ length because Jane is right there and it’s only been at most, two weeks since he ended things with her.

“I was going to give you two some space.” You whisper, though Jane is literally right there, so she can hear you.

“Oh, you don’t have to-” She starts, but Thor cuts her off, almost as if he can’t hear her.

“You do not have to give us space, cherub. You are right where you should be, at my side.” Thor doesn’t bother to whisper, but it’s clear in the volume of his voice that his words are meant only for you.

“It feels weird…” You whisper more quietly that it makes Thor move closer and lean his head down.

“It shouldn’t,” He reaches up to stroke your cheek, and you can’t help but peek at Jane.

She’s watching the two of you, her eyes darting away and back and away again, a fleeting look of confusion on her pretty face.

You reach around Thor’s side and give his side a little pinch to bring his attention back to Jane.

“She’s waiting,” you inform him, and flick your head in her direction before turning to face her again, planting yourself beside Thor just as he wants.

“Right,” Thor agrees, then wraps his arm right back around your shoulders. “What brings you to the compound, Jane? I can’t imagine anything would get you out of the desert with what you showed me last time I was there.”

Your heart gives an upsetting lurch at the reminder to Thor’s and Tony’s conversation last night, but you simply lean into Thor’s side some more, pushing down your insecurities for now.

“Yeah, um...I was in the lab when a weird energy spike completely threw off my sensors. It fried my stabilizer. So, I checked with NASA and UNOOSA, CNSA, SUPARCO, and a whole bunch of other contacts at various space agencies around the world and all of them also had similar readings. Not as strong, but they all swear that they don’t have anything in orbit or out in that quadrant. Given the strength of the surge, I contacted Tony to let him know so that he could get word to you but then he told me that you’d be here this week for a day, so I...I decided to stop by and tell you myself.”

She smiles, just a quick awkward little thing, at you and then at Thor.

Thor’s mind processes what she just told him as quickly as it can while you steal a glance at the kitchen again where Tony is peeking out this time.

“To be fair, I didn’t know you were going to be so nice.” He tells you, unapologetic that his words will reach all ears in all three rooms.

He quickly ducks out when you frown at him, leaving Bruce peeking out behind him who then panics and also pulls himself back out of sight.

What you can infer from his words is that he’d invited her to come when he’d known that you and Thor would be on your honeymoon in an attempt to get them back together?

As you look back to Jane who stands there staring at Thor with those stupid big brown eyes, you wonder if she knew Tony’s plans and that’s why she’s here.

“What’s the trajectory of the energy you found? What’s it heading towards?” Thor wonders, taking a half step forward, dropping his arm from your shoulders.

Your mind goes into a sudden frenzy as you, like him, put two and two together quickly.

“The threat?” You guess, stepping away from him but also moving around so that you can look at him and speak a little more face-to-face with him and Jane too.

You’d completely forgotten about the damn threat! You’d been so seduced and tired last night that you passed out. Then Thor woke you up so sweetly with more seduction that you’ve put the secret threat Thor has been trying to hide from you out of your mind.

His furrowed brow, large biceps bulging as he crosses his arms across his chest, betray his guilt at having kept it from you. But the two of you know that you have no time to dwell on petty arguments, so you table the argument you’d planned on having last night for another time.

“Could that be it?” You push, looking to Jane who looks a little confused by the tension in both your and Thor’s bodies.

“It might be.”

“What threat?” Jane wonders.

“What’s the matter, Cherub? What’s got you all worried?” Tony shuffles over, probably having heard the bit about the threat.

You give him a quick glance before you look at Jane, “What kind of energy reading was it? Cosmic? Solar? Celestial?”

All of the Avengers who had begun to make their way back into the common room for breakfast along with Thor, Tony, and Jane stop to look at you, several of them with mouths open and in complete surprise.

The silence is deafening, pressing in on you from every direction. Thor takes a step towards you and seems to be the only one unphased by your question.

“I don’t know that Jane would be able to determine the type of energy at this distance.” And yet, he turns to look at her once he’s spoken. “Jane?”

She blinks, still completely in shock by your knowledge, “Uh, I might be able to find a way to determine...how do you know about-?”

“As soon as Thor formally asked me to marry him I started to make a list of things that would probably be good to know in my position. Loki helped me um…” Wait, shoot...maybe you shouldn’t be so open with them?

“The weird sister helped you what?” Tony asks, casual disdain in his voice for the younger Asgardian prince.

You frown at him.

“Nevermind.” You cross your arms across your chest and sit down on the seat right behind you.

“He didn’t mean that, cherub.” Thor cuts in, moving towards you he pulls the seat beside you out to sit down, facing you. “Isn’t that right, Stark?”

“No.” You frown, really not liking the way some of them seem to really hate Loki.

Part of you knows that you can’t blame them. Loki did a lot of bad the last time he was here for an extended period of time.

He killed a lot of people and wreaked havoc on New York. They have every right to be angry at him. Even though you know this, you can’t find yourself letting them get away with their open hatred for him in front of you.

Thor looks at Tony with a pleading, his large hands on your knees as he strokes your legs softly to try and soothe you.

You see Tony roll his eyes from the corner of your own and with a silent exasperated sigh, he throws his hands out in front of him to physically push away his words.

“Alright, you’re right. I’m sorry. He’s made amends, right? He’s spent the time since he came back doing right by those people that he hurt. You’re right.” The longer Tony speaks, the more it looks like it physically hurts him to say sorry.

“Wait, you actually like Loki?” Jane asks, her smile in slight disbelief.

“Didn’t he save your life before?” You throw at her, having heard all about her infection by the Aether and how she’d helped Thor save many worlds.

It’s intimidating and not a story you’d easily forget.

At the time, you’d wondered how you’re ever going to compare to that. She’s helped Thor save Earth twice. What can you do?

Your words have the desired effect, and she quickly deflates as you meet Thor’s eye and sigh slowly.

“They don’t mean anything by it, cherub,” Thor promises, his voice soft and gentle and soothing.

You see the way Jane’s head twists in your direction at his pet name for you but he reaches up to take hold of your chin and turn your face towards his.

“Loki is lucky to have your loyalty.” He praises, looking genuinely happy about it too, but the smile leaves quickly in favor of his curiosity. “But how did you learn about different types of energy?”

“Loki hacked into the S.H.I.E.L.D. mainframe when I told him that I wasn’t sure that I was up for the task of being Queen and wife of an Avenger since I knew almost nothing about anything. I-I did a lot of reading.” You admit, heart in arrest as you gauge everyone’s reaction to Loki’s deceit. “But he only did it because I was crying and really worried and I was almost having a straight up panic attack, and he wanted to help so he offered me a place to learn and I couldn’t-I didn’t have it in me to say no even when he told me how he was going to get me the info so if you’re going to blame anyone, blame me because I was feeling so inadequate and he was just trying to make me feel better.”

Once again, the room is left in silence, save for Thor who smiles at you and reaches around to grab the back of your neck and give it a gentle squeeze.

“It’s alright. We’re not angry. Any of us, right?” As he looks around at everyone, they all nod quickly, giving you reassuring smiles save for Tony who has his arms crossed over his chest now, hand covering his mouth as he shakes with silent laughter.

“You’re angry?” You ask him, and he startles slightly when he realizes you’re talking to him.

“Me? Oh, no. No, I’m not. I just can’t wait to tell Fury that Loki hacked into his servers.” Tony bursts into laughter and has to turn away from all of you and move back into the kitchen to get a hold of himself.

“I’m sorry.” You repeat, reaching down to take hold of Thor’s hand, “I didn’t want to disappoint you.”

“You could never disappoint me, love. Never.” He smiles at you, then pulls you down to kiss your forehead before rising and moving to stand behind you. “Can you get to work on detecting the type of energy it was that destroyed your instruments?”

Jane straightens up out of her slouched pouting as she realizes that he’s talking to her, “Yes. I can. That’s kind of why I came here, to get some help from Bruce. It could also be gamma, so I wanted to consult with him before I made any decisions.”

Bruce lumbers forward between Nat and Bucky, waving Jane over, “We can go now? I don’t exactly have an appetite at the moment. If you don’t mind?”

“Not at all,” Jane shakes her head and moves for him as he turns to lead the way.

Before she can get too far, she stops and turns to look at you and Thor as he moves back to take his seat next to you, your hands pulled up to his lips.

“Uh, congrats again, both of you,” With a firm nod, she turns and leaves you all to your breakfast.

~~~~~~~~~~

“We don’t have to cut our honeymoon short?”

“Definitely not.” Thor frowns, “I would quit my job as King of Asgard if we had to end our private time.”

You smile, despite the pit in your stomach, “You can’t quit, silly.”

“I can. Loki would be more than happy to take over.”

“Well, I won’t let you quit. You’re an amazing King.”

“You’re my wife. You are clearly biased in my favor. I can’t believe a word you say.”

You chuckle at his playful banter, but after a few seconds, your worry for the people of your kingdom takes over.

“But really, Thor. If the threat coming is the same thing that destroyed Jane’s equipment, shouldn’t we go home and, I don’t know, deal with it?”

Thor breathes in deep, considering your words as he finishes pulling off his armor, tossing the last piece onto his red cape leaving him in a plain dark shirt and pants.

In a clear attempt to distract you, he rolls up the sleeves to his elbows, you’d be lying if you said it wasn’t a distraction.

Mmmph!

“I already have Sif and Hilde working on it. Loki is managing things with the palace, beefing up security for when we get there and until Tony and Bruce can come and make their own modifications.”

“Then we can enjoy our last four days?”

“Enjoy them?!” Thor moves to you, slipping his hand down around the waist of your skirt where it intertwines with the lower piece and with a firm tug, he rips through the fabric leaving only the bodice.

You gasp, hand pressed to your chest as you laugh in surprise.

“I’m going to impregnate you in the next four days if it’s the last thing I do.”

Oh my.

“No, turn around for me cherub, so I can finish ripping this dress off of you.” He coaxes you around and leans down to press a kiss to your back, then rips down the back of your bodice with more firm tugs that shake your body.

His lips trail open mouthed kisses down the side of your neck, hands gripping the flesh of your thighs with a possessive squeeze.

Despite your worries, it doesn’t seem like seeing Jane has affected his desire for you in any way. Somehow you’d never believed his devotion to you, until now.

With meeting Jane now that you’re married out of the way, and Thor’s cock still solid as he rutts into you from behind as he strips you, you feel a lot more secure in the emotions and passion you’re able to summon from him.

Almost like he knows you need it, “Tell me you love me, cherub.”

How can he doubt it?

“I love you, puppy.” It just slips out and Thor freezes.

You panic, turning to look at him because you hadn’t meant to say it, and it was something you’d just been calling him in your head in secret because of that look he gives you when he’s begging you to give in for whatever he wants in the moment.

“I’m-” He cuts you off, smashing his mouth down onto you, open wide as he delves into you, tasting you, tongue searching and coaxing.

“Mmmph,” You whimper, wrapping your arms around him to grip the back of his shirt tight.

He suddenly tosses you back onto your bed, pulling his shirt over his head and then shoving his pants down before he grabs your ankles and pulls you towards the edge. With wide splayed out hands he pushes your thighs open and settles between them, two fingers run up along your slick slit making you quiver.

“Tell me again,” he orders, voice so deep you feel it in your toes.

“I love you, pu-AH!”

[dcbutinamrev]

Heyyy! I love ur writing!!!!

can u do a historical lams story where Hamilton gets freaked out by a storm and Laurens has to comfort him🥺

Thank you!! Ha! Yes! The storm chapter tm! Or, in this case, the strom shot? The storm oneshot? This one's pretty long...Anyways, ask and ya shall recieve!

***

It's late in the evening once more in the aide-de-camp office. It's perhaps around seven in the evening. The sky not so dark yet not so light either. The fireplace roars and crackles in the parlor of the house General Washington and his staff are staying, to make the room a bit warmer than before. Lieutenant Colonel John Laurens and Alexander Hamilton sit side by side as always, working on translating letters and writing out corrospondences for tomorrrow's morning dispatch while the other aides around them such as Richard Kidder Meade, Tench Tilghman, Robert Hanson Harrison, John Fitzgerald and General Washington's Head of Intelligence: Benjamin Tallmadge, sits at the table around them with a map in front of them, placing markers as to wear the British could be and discusses plans of attack and whatnot. General Washington himself has retreated to his office to work privately with the Marquis de Lafayette to assist him in any matter.

Hamilton would often sneak in glances at Laurens beside him when the other aides aren't paying attention, they're too caught up in their heated argument. Hamilton smirks when he sees how deep in concentration Laurens is, his quill scratching agaisnt the parchment, his soft yet rough pink lips pressed together tightly as he clenches his jaw. His honey blonde hair pulled back into the traditional braid, secured with the usual dark blue ribbon. His brows are furrowed together, eyes narrowing down at the parchement before him and an already drafted letter beside him. Hamilton sees a fallen strand of hair in front of Laurens's ear and he so desperately wants to tuck it back behind his ear where it belongs. He curls his fingers to keep himself from doing so.

Hamilton grins as he knocks his knee agaisnt Laurens underneath the table. Laurens scoffs as he pauses his work for a moment to knock his knee against Hamilton's. Hamilton smiles sheepishly and he feels his freckled cheeks starting to warm up as he quickly glances away. Laurens notices this and smirks with triumph as he returns his focus to the letter before him.

"Major Tallmadge, mon ami?" says a very familiar French accented voice from nearby.

Hamilton and Laurens, along with Tallmadge and the rest of the aides look up sharply to see the Marquis de Lafayette standing at the end of the hallway with a kind smile on his face.

Major Tallmadge raises his eyebrow and walks around the table towards Lafayette. Hamilton keeps his eye on him. Tallmadge looks so similiar to Laurens with what his height, his blonde hair--though his blonde is more of a dirty blonde than honey--sky-blue eyes like Laurens, a handsome, muscular frame, broad shoulders squared and leveled, arms stiff behind his back, his gait is gracefull, smooth as he walks towards the Marquis, that Hamilton would often mistake him for Laurens himself.

"Yes, Marquis?" Tallmadge asks.

That's the only way Hamilton could tell the difference between Tallmadge and Laurens: their accents. Tallmadge, raised from Setaucket, a true New Yorker, will often say "Alright" as "Awright" with an W replacing the L while Laurens, raised from South Carolina, is a true southerner. His voice more country-like.

"The General would like to speak with you," Lafayette says. "He's right down that hall."

Tallmadge nods before disappearing around the corner.

"Ah, Marquis!" Meade says, standing up from his chair to embrace his old friend. "Welcome back to the world of living!"

The Marquis chuckles as he rolls his eyes fondly. "The General had me cooped up in there all day. I must confess, I am glad to be back among my family once more."

"Family?" Hamilton says, his heart stopping.

The Marquis raises his eyebrows and grins, patting Hamilton's shoulder and squeezes it. "Why yes, petit lion. We're all family here."

"Oh," is all Hamilton was able to say.

Hamilton couldn't help but smile as the Marquis's words rings through his head.

Family...

~~~

A short while later when the sky has truly darken, do the aides finally finish their work for the day and can finally retire. Hamilton gathers up the dispatches and letters that need to be sent while Laurens straightens the quills and inkpots and while Meade rolls up the map and Tallmadge finishes a last little assignment from General Washington. The others had already gone up the second floor to bed.

"Looks like it's about to rain," Lafayette says from the living room, glancing out the window, peelng the curtain back.

Hamilton freezes insantly, his eyes widening, face paling.

"W-What?" Hamilton stutters as he slowly turns to face Lafyaette.

"Rain," Lafayette says with a shrug. "I said it looked like it's about to rain."

"Just...just rain?" Hamilton says shakily. Laurens frowns at the hesitancy in Hamilton's voice. "Right?"

Lafayette nods, confused. "Mhm. Just rain, I believe..."

Hamilton lets out a breath. "Okay. Okay. That's okay. That's okay."

Laurens rests a hand on Hamilton's arm. "Hey, you alright, Hamilton?"

Hamilton swallows and nods, flashing Laurens a reassuring yet not convincing smile. "Yes, Laurens, I'm fine. I thank you for your co...concern..."

Laurens frowns as he glances over at the Marquis who shrugs before returning his gaze back to Hamilton.

A half hour later, when Hamilton and Laurens are finally alone together in their shared room was the Marquis actually right.

Hamilton lays with only his night shirt on and the blankets draped over his propped up knees. He leans agaisnt the pillows with his flaming red hair pulled out of its ponytail, surrounding his face in a sea of red. Hamilton has a book propped up agaisnt his knees, licking his finger before flipping the page. Laurens stands by the bed, shrugging off his blue Continental coat and draping it over the chair at the desk before untying his cravat to pull his white hunting shirt off. Hamilton glances up at him with small smile on his face as he watches Laurens climb inside the bed beside him, flipping the covers on his side and scoots closer to his Hamilton.

Hamilton chuckles as he rests his head on Laurens's bare chest, just below his chin, still reading the book. Laurens smiles softly as he wraps an arm around Hamilton, squeezing his shoulder as he presses a kiss to his brow. Hamilton then turns to press his lips agaisnt Laurens, once, twice, three times before settling back down onto his chest. The two stay like that together for quite some time, reading together and enjoying this domestic blissful peace they have with each other. This, Laurens thinks, has got to be the best part of his day.

"Whatcha readin' there, dear boy?" Laurens asks, breaking the silence.

"Plutarch Lives," Hamilton yawns as he flips the page.

Laurens chuckles. "Again?"

"Well, what can I say--"

Hamilton stops when he hears something clinking agaisnt the window. Hamilton tenses as he glances up at Laurens before sitting himself up.

"Jack...what's...what's that?" Hamilton says.

Laurens flips the bedsheets off as he climbs out of the bed and shirtless yet still wearing his breeches and bare foot, Laurens peels back the curtain slightly to see the window streaking with rain. Laurens curses.

"Ah, shit," Laurens grumbles. He releases the curtain and climbs back in the bed.

"What? What is it, my dear?" Hamilton asks shakily.

"It's rainin' darlin'," Laurens says, pulling Hamilton close to him and presses a kiss to his lips. "Nothin' to worry 'bout. Let's just get some rest. We both need it."

Hamilton chuckles and nods. "Yes, you're right, my dear."

Laurens presses a kiss to Hamilton's brow before blowing out the candle beside him as Hamilton closes the book.

"Night, Ginger," Laurens says with a smirk.

"Night, Jackass," Hamilton teases, closing his eyes as he rests his head on Laurens's chest.

~~~

Hamilton awakes with a sharp gasp when he hears a thunderous boom. He shoots upright in the bed, breathing hard and instantly begins to shake. He blinks the sleep out of eyes and winces when he sees the lighting--a bright white--flash. He clamps a hand over his mouth to stifle the scream as to not wake Laurens who sleeps peacefully on his side, his back facing Hamilton.

Hamilton bites his lip hard when he hears the sharp wind whistle outside, the branches dancing through the gusty wind. Hamilton squeezes his eyes shut and flinches when he sees another flash of lightning flash outside. He whimpers when he hears the boom again, clearly remembering the hurricane back in Nevis. He remembers his home being destroyed, being completely eaten up by the raging storm. Hamilton remembers, clearly, the shrilled screams of the civilians being swallowed by the waves of the flood as he runs to find shelter, to find safety. Hamilton could still hear the distant wails of infants. Hamilton hears another boom and yelps, his body trembling. His heart beating faster, his breathing sharp and labored. He squeezes his eyes harder.

Hamilton could see his younger self crouched, hidden somewhere in an abondened home, knees up to his chest as he watches with horror as his home gets destroyed, burned to ashes with the houses nearby on fire due to the lightning strikes. Hamilton yelps when he sees a lightning flash, thinking it would burn the house they're currently staying. He shakes, as if the Earth itself were shaking as well.

Hamilton tries to focus on his breathing, trying to calm himself, trying to focus on the now and on the present. Trying to remember who is and where he is.

"Alex...?" Laurens grumbles, stirring awake as he could feel Hamilton's trembles beside him and hear his whimpers.

Hamilton whimpers again when he hears the thunder, burying his face into his knees, as he squeezes his eyes shut in hopes it would keep the tears at bay.

Laurens frowns, his heart cracking when he sits up. He frowns when he sees Hamilton trembling beside him. Laurens presses his lips together as he tries to figure out what to do. He's never seen Hamilton in so much distress as this before.

"Alexander...?" Laurens says.

Hamilton yelps again and flinches when he sees the lightning flash. Hamilton presses the heel of his plam to his mouth, to stifle the whimper that escapes him. Laurens's heart cracks even more at the sight. Laurens sighs through his nose as he wraps an arm around Hamilton, pulling him closer and rubbing his shoulder up and down comfortingly.

A fear of storms, Laurens thinks. Who would have guessed?

"J-J-John...?" Hamilton whimpers, wincing at the lightning again.

Laurens nods. "Yes. It's me my dear boy. I'm here." A pause. "I'm here. You're okay...you're okay..."

Hamiltons swallows. "H-Hurricane..."

Laurens shakes his head. "There's no hurricane, love. You're with me."

"With you..." Hamilton murmurs, his head on Laurens's shoulder as he sniffs.

Laurens nods, a small smile on his face as he presses a kiss to his forehead. "With me."

Silence.

"You fear storms?" Laurens asks. "Why didn't you tell me?"

Hamilton sniffs and whimpers, gripping Laurens's arm. "I don't fear them. It's just...I...they bring me back to the Caribbean, where I was raised. When I was fourteen...a...a hurricane came and it...it..."

"Alex, you don't have to tell me--"

"No..." Hamilton sniffs and sits up. "You desrve to know..." He clears his throat. "When I was fourteen...a...a hurricane came...and it...it destroyed my home, Nevis in the British West Indies in the Caribbean. I...I...I was a clerk at the time in the countinghouse of two New York merchants...and by then...I had already lost my father."

Laurens doesn't say anything.

"He abandoned me when I was ten...and...when I was twleve...my mother fell ill and so did I. I recuperated but my mother..."

"She died," Laurens finishes.

Hamilton nods, tears in his eyes. Laurens pulls him close as Hamilton continue.

"Then...my brother and I moved in with our cousin who not long after we moved in, committed suicide..."

"Alex..."

"And then the hurricane came," Hamilton explains. "It...James, my brother, and I were...were seperated because of it. Never saw him agian..."

"Alex..."

"It destroyed everything," Hamilton mumbling. "It ate everything up. Destroyed homes, killed people. It killed chlldren. I don't understand...why...out of all people...did I survive?"

"Alex...I'm so sorry," Laurens soothes. "I--"

"Just hold me, Jack," Hamilton whispers, choking out a quiet sob. "Please..."

Laurens nods and presses a kiss to Hamilton's forehead before pulling him even closer. "Shh...of course, love. I'm right here. You're safe, Alexander. You're not back there. You're home."

Hamilton swallows as he looks up at Laurens, cradling Laurens's jaw.

"Jack?" Hamilton asks, sniffling.

Laurens smiles softly as he wipes the stray tears off of Hamilton's freckled cheeks.

"Yes?" Laurens asks, eyebrow raised.

"Promise me...just promise me, Jack...you'll...you'll never leave me...you'll stay here...with me...forever..." A pause. “Please...I love you...and I lost everyone...I can’t lose you too...just...just promise me...Jack...

Laurens inhales sharply, holding his breath as he pinches lips together. He rests his chin on Hamilton's head, wrapping both arms around him, pressing a soft kiss into Hamilton's russet curls.

"I promise."

What a lie...

[johnkrrasinski]

dwindling, mercurial high

full masterlist

Pairings: Andy Barber x female!reader 

Word count: 2,733

Warning: SMUT!!! infidelity/cheating, age gap, unprotected sex, dirty talk, angst, lots of angst. (MUST BE 18+) 

Summary: based on the song ‘illicit affairs’ by taylor swift. things changed between you and andy, the man you’d been crushing on for the longest time, after you returned home from college. what was born from a single glance & stolen stares turned into a secret addiction, something neither of you could get sober from. 

a/n: the idea piqued my imagination after watching taylor’s folklore long pond studio session and i wondered what it’d be like to be the third person instead of the cheated one, thus this angsty fic was born. reblog & feedback are always appreciated. 

⭒☆━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━☆⭒

You closed your eyes as your back hit the wall repeatedly, you held onto him as tight as possible as you moaned in his ear. The bristle of his beard tickled your neck as he nipped your sensitive spot, causing your head to spin. The coil in your abdomen tightened, so did your legs around his waist, and you clenched around him, pushing him to thrust harder into you, chasing your orgasms. Your wailings grew louder and you cried out his name like prayer as his pace become sloppier.

Time became hazy as you plummeted into bliss while he continued to impale you, prolonging your release as well. You wanted the moment to last as long as possible as you presented your body as a vessel for him to obtain pleasure, the kind that he couldn’t get at home from his lovely wife. You didn’t mind that it took him longer to reach his peak, the comforting feeling of him being inside you was like cozying up to your favourite knit sweater and a cup of hot chocolate whilst it was raining outside.

But rains don’t last forever, and the sun was always around the corner, lurking to appear and scorch the planet once more, waking everyone up out of their comfortable place. And that’s what it was like being with Andy.

He groaned as he released deep inside you, resting his face on your shoulder while trying to catch his breath. He kissed you on the lips, claiming your mouth as you ran your fingers through his hair until he needed air. But you didn’t, because he was the air that you needed. Then he set you on your feet gently and he began putting on his clothes. “It’s stopped coming down, I should head back now, Laurie’s going to come home soon and I told her that I’d be working from home today. It’d be suspicious if I left the house without telling her.”

You nodded, “…okay.” But it wasn’t okay, how much longer were you going to have these clandestine meetings? How could you tell him that you wanted him to stay and hold you close just for once?

He slipped his feet into his shoes and untied the lace. You leaned on your hands against your study desk and watched his flushed state longingly as if you were trying to speak with your gaze and you wanted him to get the message because words would hurt both of you. He put on his coat and swung the hood over his head then stood before you, “are you okay, kid?”

No, how could you even ask me that? “Yeah.” He always asked the same question after every time you both made love but never once did you tell him the truth and he believed you. He kissed you on the forehead and there he goes, leaving you with your tears and fury once more without a single weight in his heart.

How did you end up here? It began last summer after you came back home from college. You were going to work in your father’s law firm once you finished law school and obtained your degree. Your father was a lawyer and had a good friendship with the Barbers since you were little. You even watched Jacob being born when Laurie went into labour. Besides living across from each other and worked in the same field, you were like a big sister to Jacob too. He was always a shy, introverted kid who didn’t make friends easily so Andy truly cherished your companion for his son.

You were always happy being a big sister figure to Jacob, you were both the only children so it was easy to bond over that. But what you’d never admit out loud, was also the fact that yous secretly had a crush on Jacob’s dad. What’s not to swoon over? Andy was extremely good looking, a good father and a loving husband. He was a top lawyer, courteous, soft-spoken and always treated you kindly whenever you came over.

It affected your dating life in high school because, despite all the boys asking you out, you never said yes to them. Because there was only one man that you wanted and you couldn’t have him. Even in college, you tried to forget him and seek for someone else, but even college boys couldn’t live up to Andy.

Three years went by and you finally returned home and were ready to start your career as a lawyer. Law and crimes always fascinated you because you believed that justice wasn’t as simple as black or white, or the good guy versus the bad guy so it came naturally for you to follow your father’s footsteps.

Your father invited the Barbers over for dinner to celebrate your homecoming. Laurie asked you about the college life and teased if you might’ve had dated a few boys and you nervously refuted the question by telling her that you were too busy with studying. Andy sat across you and you tried so hard not to make eye contact with him but you couldn’t fight the urge and you swore you saw him glance at you once or twice and he’d quickly look away once you caught him.

One afternoon, a couple of days after the dinner, when your father was at the court, and your mother was at her boutique, you decided to come over to the Barbers’ house. Jacob texted you earlier about his Physics homework and asked for your help on doing it. You were going to start working at the firm on Monday so you had plenty of spare time at home, doing whatever you wished for. You were bored, you had been reading books and watching Netflix all day so you decided to spend time helping Jacob with his homework.

You knocked on the door and texted him, “I’m outside.” You were a little early than the agreed time so Andy opened the door instead of the person you expected.

“Mr. Barber, hi! Is Jacob home yet?” You tried your best to keep your composure.

“No, he said he was staying for Math. He didn’t tell you?”

“Uh, he must’ve forgotten. He asked me earlier to help him with his homework and I thought I could come by early to hang out, but it’s fine, I’ll just come back later. Thanks, Mr. Barber.”

“You could come inside and wait for Jacob here if you want?” He offered.

“Um, are you sure, Mr. Barber? I don’t wanna be a bother.”

“No, please, Laurie hasn’t come home yet, and I’d appreciate the company. And just call me Andy.”

“Okay, yeah, sure. I’ve got no one to talk to at home yet, anyway. Except for my cat who only comes to me when she’s hungry.”

He chuckled at the joke as he closed the door behind you. “You want anything to drink?”

“Coffee would be nice, thank you Mr. Barber.”

He gave you a look at the nickname. “Sorry, I meant, Andy.”

“You’ve really grown since the last time I saw you, ____. You’ve even gotten good-looking.” He nonchalantly said whilst he was making your coffee. “Milk?”

“Huh?” your heart was beating fast at his flattering words. “Do you want some milk in your coffee?”

“Yes, please.” You gulped, mentally screaming at yourself to keep it together. “Are you saying that I was an ugly duckling, Andy?”

He chuckled, “no, what I meant was, your appearance definitely changed and I like it.” He served the coffee on the dining table where he laid a bunch of papers and a laptop and you tried to maintain your distance despite every cell in your body was begging for you to sit closer to him.

You hoped he couldn’t hear the way your breath hitched so you drank your coffee with shaky hands. He asked you about college or shared some advice in becoming a young lawyer. He also caught you up with stories that you missed while you were away. How he found out Jacob was bullied by this kid in his school and how he and Laurie had been arguing a lot lately.

“I’m sorry about that, Andy. But you two will work it out, what marriage doesn’t have its disputes, right? If you both had made it this far, I’m sure you can make it for many more years.”

“Thanks, ____. Be sure to keep that in mind if a guy starts a quarrel with you, okay?” He sipped his own coffee.

“I’ll have to find a guy first, I guess.”

“Are you not seeing anyone?” He gave you a quizzical look.

“No, just haven’t found the time, I guess.”

“Oh, c’mon. You’re an intelligent and attractive young woman. You should go out and explore.”

“And what if I couldn’t find one that I want, Andy?” You stirred your coffee, unable to look him in the eye.

“What do you want, ____?” He inched his face closer to you, making it hard to breathe. His ocean blue eyes bored into yours, with the kind of look that you never saw before. In this proximity, you could see how his pupils had dilated, filling the rim with darkness lust. And you didn’t question his intentions or what he was thinking but at that moment, you had never wanted him more. And you needed him. You needed him to grant your heart’s greatest desire. Him.

“You,” you voice was barely a whisper. “I want… You.”

“Say it, say it louder.”

“I want you, Andy. I’ve wanted you forever.”

Then as if the time had frozen, he slammed his lips onto yours, nearly causing your chair to fall back if only he didn’t catch you. Andy grabbed your face and kissed you with a burning passion. You shut your eyes, reeling from the swirling emotions in your stomach. It wasn’t butterflies but the whole damn zoo. Andy licked your bottom lip and you parted your mouth for him, allowing his tongue to enter and tangle itself with yours.

You whimpered and you felt Andy smirked at the way your body reacted to him. Andy then stood up and lifted you onto the table, and he slightly pulled your hair back, exposing your neck to him. He began trailing kisses there and his right hand roamed around your body until it reached the hem of your off-the-shoulder top and it travelled to your breast and he toyed with it, pinching the nipple and fondle with the globe.

“Andy…” taking your whimpers as a green light, he moved his hand down to the zipper of your jeans, fumbled with the buttons and he pulled them down just enough for his hand to caress your womanhood. Blood rushed to your cheeks when he felt your arousal. He shoved the G-string aside, allowing his fingers to stroke you.

“If I knew how much you wanted me, I would’ve made a move sooner, baby.”

The coalescence of his voice, his plump lips and his hands touching you all over nearly made you forgot where you were until the act was interrupted by Jacob’s voice from the door, “Dad, I’m home!” Andy quickly stopped his assault on you and let you go. You stood on shaky legs as you tried to smooth over your rumpled top and zip up your jeans.

Luckily, when Jacob found you both in the kitchen, he didn’t suspect anything and you followed him to his room, walking away from Andy as if nothing even happened. And that was the beginning of your doomed affair.

His infidelity carried on for months and none of you had found the strength to break it off. You knew it was wrong in so many ways. You always considered The Barbers as your second family despite your latent feelings for Andy. You’d be letting down so many people if they found out about this affair. Each time you both ran off to find escapism in a secluded place, you were consumed by guilt. Every time you told yourself that you can always stop, that he can always stop, you were choked with words. The desire has rooted itself way too deep and none of you could go back now.

It started in your room and once he’d grown weary of the atmosphere, he’d take you to a motel a little outside of town where nobody really knew who you were and it has now taken you to an empty parking lot. Andy laid on the reclined shotgun seat with his clothes off and his pants around his ankles. You leaned your hand on the window as his cock stretched you open from under.

He loved the way your breasts jiggled with each thrust. You had your shirt lifted just enough to display your breasts for him while your shorts and underwear were thrown off to the backseat. His cock was hitting your G-spot repeatedly, creating tantalizing friction. You writhed above him, screaming his name as loud as you possibly could with your mind disarrayed from his thrusts. He had both of his hands gripping your hips solidly, controlling your move as you rode him.

“After all the time I’ve fucked you, you’re still so tight,” He groaned. He moved one of his hands to breast, pinching the nipple and you mewled from the pleasurable sting. He slid his hand up to your throat, cutting off your airway, suffocating you. Your whimpers your muted but it didn’t stop you from moving up and down on him. His other hand slid under your body, he toyed with your wetness and rubbed your clit, causing you to clench around him. “You gonna cum all over my fat cock, baby?”

His filthy words never failed to arouse you. If anyone had told fifteen years old you that the man you had such admired and respect, though from afar, had a foul mouth during sex, you would’ve told them to piss off because they had no idea what the hell were they talking about, but now you had an explicit, front-row seat view of it, you couldn’t look at him any other way.

The way his cock rutted into you and the way his digits worked you over and over again, while his massive hand made you struggle for air, sent your body into overdrive and you cried out his name as if it was your salvation. Your brain was clouded with ecstasy as he continued to ram into you, chasing his own release.

You lost the power to straddle him and collapsed on top of him. Andy’s hands travelled back into your hips, locking you in place as you were pliable with your prolonged orgasm. “Fuck, I’m gonna cum too, baby.”

Then Andy emptied his seed into you, filling you up with his load, and he groaned out loud in your ear. You both tried to abate your breathing while he was still sheathed inside you. The closeness felt intimate and comforting and somehow it felt like you were committing treachery. Your limbs were intertwined and you didn’t wanna untangle yourself from him because you knew if you did, he’d drive you home and take the less travelled by road and that would be it.

There was no post-sex cuddling or aftercare. There was no murmuring soft words under a duvet and exchanging tender kisses while basking in the afterglow with him. Because that’s all this was, an illicit affair. All there was after a steamy rendezvous were quick showers to wash off traces of each other as if you didn’t even exist and a spontaneously fabricated tale so the other person wouldn’t know where the other one had truly been.

You wanted to throw things at him and scream, don’t you fucking call me kid or baby, I’m neither of those things. You wanted to hate him for the godforsaken mess he’d turned you into, but you couldn’t. Because he had shown you colours you couldn’t see with anyone else and you couldn’t erase the secret language he taught you from your mind despite the idiotic fool that he made you.

And no matter how many times you witnessed him kissing his wife like a loving spouse would and how long he made you wait for a call, you knew damn well that you’d do it all over again for him in a heartbeat.

[a-dorin]

worth

pairing: commander fox x senator!reader

word count: 709

warnings: angst, mentions of death, mentions of violence, fluff at the end, crying, dealing with grief, teasing 

a/n: helllloooo! it’s been a while since i wrote for fox. you can find the full list of prompts here, and let me know if you’d like to be added to the taglist! i hope you guys enjoy :))

prompt: “you are more than you think of yourself. you’re everything to me.”

“how could they?”

his voice is to utterly small, twisted grief as you pace about, a hand on your chin. rain falls from flint grey clouds as they linger in the sky, the patter against the viewport unrelenting and unforgiving. your eyes sting, the threat of tears prominent as your gaze flickers over to the viewport, watching as the rain streams down the transparisteel. 

“you know politics, fox,” your voice is shaky, “the chancellor is going to stop at nothing to get what he wants. the rest of them just want to capitalize off the war. there is a good portion of senators who would rather send battalions of clones off to fight rather than their own--” 

“so sending thousands of my brothers off to die is worth the price of victory?” 

swiveling on your heel, your heart nearly splits into two. 

he’s perched on your desk, arms folded across his chest. his head is hung low, the glisten of tears falling from his cheeks, splattering onto his armor. droplets of rain hang loosely in his curls, as it was a trek to reach your office from his station. there’s a quiet hiccup from his throat, gloved hands shielding his face seconds later. 

crossing over to him, you wrap your arms around his frame, resting your chin on his head. under your touch, he comes completely undone, the sobs erupting. it’s a shattered wail, the sound of mourning. almost as if his bottled up grief was spilling out of him, flowing from his tattered heart. 

“fox,” you choke back your own tears, “fox, it’s okay.”

“it’s not though,” he whimpers, burying his head into your chest, “it only proves what they all think of us. we’re all so disposable. we’re worthless.” 

“don’t even--”

“we are though,” resentment floods his tone, “we were created in a lab on kamino to be these worthless beings who only lived to fight in a war. all of the senators live these luxe and lavish lives, drinking wine and laughing and clinking glasses over beautiful dinners. meanwhile, my brothers are out on distant planets, fighting tooth and nail, desperate to live another minute. my brothers will come back, haunted by the terrors of what they encountered, only to be reminded that we’re at the mercy of republic. that we’re only worth a few minutes of a fight.”

“fox,” you murmur, fingers brushing his heated cheeks as you tilt his head upward, “listen to me, please.”

mocha depths, filled to the brim with distress, soften when they meet your own eyes, his muscles relaxing as the pad of your thumb wipes away a stray tear. your statement seemed to have pulled him from his despair, for just a moment. he clears his throat, the words raspy, yet clear. 

“your voice alone is worth listening to, cyar’ika.”

leaning in, you press your forehead against his, “you are more than you think of yourself. you’re everything to me.”

a hand wraps around the nape of your neck, tenderly squeezing the flesh, “you are everything to me too, my love. i am aware you may have some associates who do support the--”

“anyone who believes that your brothers are disposable are no friends of mine,” you shake your head, “you, and all of your brothers, deserve rights, fox. senator amidala and i will keep going with everything in us to make that happen.”

“i have no doubt that you won’t stop either,” a soft chuckle rumbles in his throat, “you know, i do like spectating when you have the floor. it’s very sexy.”

“it is not--” you protest. 

“don’t worry,” his lips twitch into an amused smirk as you begin to pout, “i’ll make sure to come to the next senate meeting. i’ll make sure you know i’m there too.”

“please don’t, i’ll probably be a flustered mess-”

“you don’t want me to watch you verbally assault the other senators?” bliss bubbles within you as you watch a broad grin envelop his features, his aura brightening. 

“no,” you mumble, rolling your eyes playfully.

“hey cyar’ika,” leather grazes your cheek, heart skipping a beat. 

“hmm?” you hum, lashes fluttering as warmth radiates from the material. 

“let me give you a kiss to show you how much you’re worth to me.”

☆ ☆ ☆ ☆ ☆

taglist: @fandom-gal44 @dexthtoyounglings @xcertaindarkthingsx @idiotonanadventure @pinkwhorecrux @letitrainathousandflames @maiaofmischief​ @laorme34 @vinciwolf​ @catsnkooks​ @starflyer-104​

[widowsofchaos]

Here With You

summary: The weight of drugs can break any relationships, but your love for him is greater.

pairing: Mike Weiss x black!reader

10. “Do you know how it feels to wish for death every day?”

12. “Because I couldn’t bear the idea of you choosing to stay with me out of pity or guilt.”

Beta by @avintagekiss24 A big thanks to my good sis! Thank for being such a great friend on taking the time to help edit!🤍

warnings: fluff and angst.

a/n: this is 1/2 of my submissions for @angrybirdcr ‘s 200 follower challenge! I choose to write for Chris Evan’s character Mike Weiss. Great underrated film! Thanks for hosting, babe! <3 thank you for being so understanding on my lateness on my submissions! <3 sorry again for being late!

do not repost my works!

This wasn’t new -- this feeling of dread --- awaiting for the shit-storm of pain, and the rainfall of tears. A slow, and yet tender feeling like a blossoming bruise. The inside of your cavity feels shattered by every inhale of a strained wheeze.

Cloudiness floats around your skull like a haze, but you move on auto-pilot --- your feet move by the surge of determination, and commitment; a bitter-sweet twinge weighs on your tongue to witness someone you love fall apart at the seams.

It’s 3 in the morning now, the moon beams high in the inky sky. The apartment is blanketed by darkness, cautiously all lights are off. Chaos ensues, your heart lurches at the muffled vomiting, and whimpers from the bedroom down the hall. Your fingers tighten around the bucket, clutching as the plastic digs into your palm.

Two chilled soaked rags hang limply over your forearm. Breathless as your footfalls dash against the carpeting, bolting through the room to see Mike slumped-over the edge of the bed, his legs tangled in wrinkled sheets.

Drenched sweat soaks through two thick pillows --- now a bit flat, and wet --- blankets strewn around by fits of rage or Mike crying that his skin is too boiling hot. A lone lit lamp illuminates the room into a dim dewy yellow flourish --- an excess of light hurts Mike’s eyes, and gives him a migraine.

The bulb emitting makes his entire body shine by the sheen of sweat, shivering, and groans of your name slips from his quivering pink lips.

Half of his body leaning over the mattress, his trembling fingers shakingly gripping the carpeted flooring, as if he was trying to crawl his way out of bed. “I’m here, Mikey. I’m here.” A broken sob escapes your lips, as you gently fall on your knees beside him. Tears break its watery shield, and collide down your cheeks to see Mike crumble.

Drool pooling from his mouth, and puke residue sits at the corner of his lips. His eyes pinching shut-tight, crying at the pain, you shushing him as you caress his cheek.

With all your strength, with gentle hands, you push Mike over on his back, guilt coiling in the pit of your belly at him moaning. Your hands sliding underneath his armpits, you maneuver him -- twisting his torso, and legs so his body can lay horizontally on the bed.

“I’m sorry, baby.” Mike croaks, his voice was hoarse, and raw. You bundle a bit of your nightie in your hand, to wipe his mouth --- it didn’t matter, you’ll wash it later. “It’s okay. No need to apologize.” You stroke your knuckles sweetly against his cheek, reassuring him by touch and voice that you want to be here; to remind him you’re here for the long haul.

You kiss the crease between his furrowing brows, then your lips featherly trail upward, and kiss his forehead, with no hesitation to sweat sticking to your mouth. “You’re still a bit warm, but the fever is going down.” You spoke breathlessly against his skin, your lips tickling his skin.

Gingerly laying the rag on his forehead, Mike sighs in relief, his lashes fluttering closed at the cooling sensation surging through his buzzing head.

It’s been four days of Mike going raw cold-turkey. Four days of pure hell for Mike, and four days of pure grief for yourself.

In the beginning of this trial, when the drugs began flushing out of his system Mike wasn’t himself --- it was as if he’s a frothing beast scouting for substance. Screaming matches spewing from his irritation, itching between these four walls; Mike resembling a caged animal.

Pure rage masking self-hatred; anger at the aches deep in his muscles, pity at that maybe he can’t do this.

To accomplish sobriety.

Vomiting with his head limp, and deep in the toilet, hours of crying, and pleas for that one last hit --- Mike screaming for God to end him, and that he doesn’t deserve you. Cradling him in your arms, rocking him like an infant, as he sputters incoherent cries; speaking in hushed tones in his ear that you love him --- all his flaws, and scars.

What provoked his final decision to get clean, and start a new slate for one’s health, life longevity, and to keep your love --- was a discovery he dreamt to have long ago but felt he wasn’t deserving to earn.

“I’m sorry --- a-about the ca--r-rpet.” Mike whispers in choppy puffs, whining low. Jesus, this man is in pain, and he’s worried about you being mad at the carpet? You shook your head slightly, gesturing to him that you weren’t mad.

“Don’t apologize for that, it’s nothing. I’ll clean it later.” You spoke in a calm hush, as you placed the bucket on the floor, next to his bedside.

Your hand delicately pad against the clammy biceps with one rag, testing his bodily temperature, taking the remaining rag off of your slightly cold-numbing skin.

You kiss the corner of his brow, as you rub down his chest with the crisp rag, his lips part as an airy breath laced with deep relief escapes; as the refreshing fabric graces his flesh. His chest hair swirled a bit under the comforting circular motions.

Admiring his body, your eyes trace over every ink stroke of his tattoos adorning him. Sheen of water linger as you soothe Mike, silently reciting the Buddhist quote on his chest. Through the rag, you trace the designs of his tattoos by the tips of your fingers --- soft as petals.

Your hand travels the rag downward his torso to dull the slight overheating. Mike hums lowly with his eyes laxly closed shut, his breathing now ceasing into an easy rhythm. Memories begin flooding Mike’s head, as his breathing relaxes steadily. Recollections of how Mike and yourself met years prior --- four years to be exact --- at the hospital you work at.

It was a dark cloudy day, the outside world drenched with heavy pouring rain; the atmosphere was thick with dread, and scented with antiseptic. Sniveling, and irritated with a forthcoming migraine, the flickering lightening tube hovering above him was like a menacing tick, making him twitch internally; as he laid in the hospital bed.

Balling the white blue-polka dotted hospital gown into his fists, the fabric bundling between his fingers. Mike was silent, as he scanned his environment motionlessly.

Accidental overdose is the verdict. Sunken eyes with lavender hues, as the mulling cadence of ringing phones, bustling chatter of nurses, and squeaking footfalls of passing doctors flood the hallways.

A click of the door opening, and in all your glory, your hair tied in a bun with a few curls straying, wearing a purple nurse uniform, a clipboard clutched in your palm, Nike sneakers for comfort --- being on your feet all day --- and a name tag boldly showcasing your printed name.

In your palm, are clear bags of his folded clothing, and shoes. Nicely you place the bags at the edge of the bed near Mike’s feet.

“Hello Mr. Weiss. How are you feeling right now?” A melodic timbre that soothed Mike, lulling his weary mind to a blissful state. The concern didn’t go unnoticed, how you worded your question in the namesake of professionalism, and humane authenticity.

‘Right now?’ Usually people would ask how he’s feeling as if he wasn’t struggling prior with the question, ‘How are you today?’ and his usual response would be, ‘Shitty.’ sealed with a somber shit-eating grin, but you asked how he’s feeling right now, so you can help him, not analyze him.

You didn’t sound fake, nor condescending. Usually a lot of medical staff didn’t have much regard for addicts, nor at least a speck of pity or sympathy. Mike’s tongue was heavy, struggling a little to speak up.

Gaping his mouth open and closed, like a mindless goldfish. You peeked over your clipboard, with a sweet arched brow, giggling lowly to yourself --- your brown hues sparkling in amusement. It was a tiring day, so to see this man stammering over his words was beyond cute, and the highlight of your day.

“Are you okay?” You asked with a small curling smile, hiding your snickering behind the clipboard, with only musing eyes squinting in giggles appearing.

“Yeah, I’m fine. I’m actually better now.” Mike perked up, coughing a bit as his voice was hoarse, bashful, and his pale cheeks dusting pink. Jesus, what’s wrong with me? Why in the fuck am I floundering? Get a grip, Mike! Mike never stuttered around women, always flirtatious. This was new for him.

“That’s good. How is your body feeling after the sedatives? Any discomfort right now?” Your soft voice interrupted his rampant thoughts.

“Just a bit groggy, but what else is new?” Mike humorlessly chuckles, as he shamelessly eyes your body. You notice him checking you out, but you elect to ignore him with a warm smile — but you couldn’t deny, you’re silently enjoying his wordless flirtation; despite your fatigued stature, this man still saw attraction to you.

“I promise it’ll pass. Just get some rest, and stay hydrated.” With a flick of your carmine painted nails, you smoothly perked the clipboard on your waist as you unlatched the metal clip, retrieving a few handbills.

“Here I have chosen a few pamphlets for rehab centers, and a few numbers for therapy agencies.”

“I don’t need those.” Mike pushed your out-stretched hand gently away.

You arched your brow at him, clicking your tongue at his ignorance, “And why don’t you need them?” You inquire kindly, a cautious tone; not wanting to release this man from the hospital’s care, just to snort and shoot up into an early grave.

“Listen, I can tell you’re sweet. Too sweet for someone like me to be concerned with. I’ve tried to get clean, and it never works. It’s just not for me.” Mike hastily sits up, slinging his legs over the bed, flinging the thin blanket off of him, “It’s not worth it.” He mutters under his breath.

You were entirely taken back, wincing at how low he talks of himself. Intently watching this man hastily open the bags to get his clothes, the edge of his jaw pinched pink --- like ripe warm peaches. Was it due to embarrassment?

You place the papers on the bed, as you walk more closely to him.

“You are worth it.” You place his cold hands into yours, cupping as if you’re cradling. Trying to get to his eye-level, make him see that you were serious.

He doesn’t dare to glance your way, “Doesn’t matter.” Mike insists, slowly seizing his hands from your grasp, “Why bother trying only to fail? And then disappoint everyone all over again?” His nose was flaring, not wanting to lash his tongue at you, just at the idea of his addictions being the topic of discussion irks him.

It’s not that he doesn’t want help … it’s that hopeless sinking feeling, that he’s just incurable. A burden. A problem, masking pain with sarcasm and substance to numb it all. A demon clawing at his shoulder, spitting self-hate in his ear.

You’re just not worth the trouble, Mike.

As he stood up from the bed, stretching out his shirt, he noticed from the corner of his eye that you were staring at him worriedly. On instinct, pulling the mask down to cover his anguish once more.

“Wanna help me get dressed, sweetheart?” A curling faux self-confident smirk that was forced, you sniff out like a bloodhound. You immediately caught on the familiar behavior, a usual route for patients to cope out with defense mechanisms. You saw this tactic day in and day out.

But more importantly, it’s one you use too well.

“It may not feel like it now, but it’s not impossible. You’re not the first patient I had who felt this way.” You spoke with conviction, ignoring the insistent words ushered by doctors from the past that were ringing at the back of your head, you can't help someone if they don’t want to get help.

It’s not a martyr shtick, nor a God complex --- but how Mike looked so distressed and sickly as he was pulled in the hospital on the stretcher pained you straight in the heart, parallel to many others before.

“You never know if you don’t try.” You perk your hands on your hips, with an insisting stance. It wasn’t pushy, but Mike could tell you weren’t going to back down.

How you stood firmly with the hands perched on your curvous hips that strained subtly against the cotton uniform --- it was hot, how you stood your ground to him, yet no insulting persistence. Your bubble cheeks scrunching up so cutely. Mike just couldn’t help but be turned on, maybe it's your caring nature mixing into it.

Mike breathed through his nose, his head hung low, his hands sinking into the mattress. A sign of defeat, not entirely submitting, but how your words were honeyed with sterling sweetness got him to halt, and process how his life led up to here.

He glimpses through his long pretty lashes, “Alright --” He cheekily scans your name-tag, pretending he didn’t already memorized it from the moment you walked in.“Y/n. I’ll go. You’re pretty convincing. Maybe you should have been a lawyer too.”

“Oh --- you’re a lawyer, huh?”

“An unlikable one to be exact.”

You suck your teeth teasingly, “I highly doubt that. You seem likeable to me.” You pucker your bee-stung lips with jovial tease, as you tug on the curtain surrounding his bed to offer privacy, his eyes zero on your soft lips that glisten with chapstick sheen, his arms mid-frozen holding onto his articles of clothing.

“Now get dressed, and we’ll get you out of here.” You chuckle, only the shadow of your stihollute appears. Mike chuckles to himself, a little shake of his head, he liked you from the very start.

You knew the circumstances of dating an addict, from day one you knew the weight of his demons Mike carried on his back. He laid all his cards on the table, and you leaped into this life with him head-first.

But how could you not fall for him? His charm, his blunt wit, his intelligence, his kindness and that beautiful face? Only a fool would be blind not to be swooned off their feet for the one and only Mike Weiss. After the first -- rather intense --- first meeting, it was definitely not the last encounter for Mike and yourself.

After agreeing to go to a rehab program, Mike flirted with you immensely; along with requesting for you to accompany him on his first day. “For moral support.” he shrugged, a flirtatious smile tugging at the corners of his mouth.

His first day was stoic, but with hushed side-commentary, and sly remarks. Muffling your laughter, you would poke his ribs, silently telling him to knock it off. It didn’t take long for an unusual friendship to develop. You really didn’t see it coming, and if Mike was to be honest, he didn’t either.

The realization of deep love was agnated to a love-drunk punch to the heart.

Days blurring into weeks into months with good morning and goodnight calls, late night conversations - those were the heart-shattering times. It was difficult for Mike to open up his layers, bottling his hurt inside to the point of shaking sobs at 3 am, clutching the phone.

Choppy incoherent words, spurts of feeling worthless. It began with you two having brunch which then led into dinner dates. Soon trust was earned, and you began hanging out at his house or your apartment.

A nurturing nurse and a sardonic lawyer becoming friends--his dry humor doesn’t rub you the wrong way, or how you don’t see it as obnoxious.

“Later when you take a shower, I’ll get you fresh sheets.” You murmur sweetly, as you finished massaging him. Mike slowly peels his eyes open, hooded and squinting. Your voice is silvery to his ears, it always appeases his darkest times --- like that hopeful light at the end of the tunnel.

Silently his eyes raked over your body, your hushed voice brought him back to reality. As he soaked in your appearance, Mike couldn’t stomach how tired you were, your eyes were droopy, your curls sloppily disrayed. As his eyes traveled from your exhausted face to your breasts that swelled over the past weeks to the ample bump protruding against your nightie.

Now entering into your second trimester.

Mike began silently crying, pinching his eyes shut as lone tears spilled down his cheeks. “Don’t cry, baby. We’re getting through this, I’m so proud of you.” You kiss his wet cheeks, not minding the salty tears that kiss his eyes. Nimble sweet kisses, and cooing. You knew how hard he was working to get sober.

“You don’t need this shit.” Mike croaked, not daring to open his eyes, and see the pity in yours.

“Stop that. I love you, I’m not going anywhere. I’m staying right here with you.” You caress his cheeks by the gentle graze of your knuckles, shushing him. Lulling him to calm down from a pending panic attack.

You soft humming quills him, with only a sniffle here and there. You kiss the tip of his nose. “I love you.” Mike mutters under his breath. You giggle under your breath, feeling a bit bashful --- how can he make you so shy even after three years together?

You snivel a bit, biting back a sheen of tears, “And I love you too.” You’ll never get tired of saying that.

It’s been a long road, filled with bumps and turbulence. Many women would have left a long time ago, abandoning Mike at his lowest, but you just couldn’t. You’re too addicted to Mike, from the taste of him, to his scent, to the feel of his skin. His sharp tongue, and his humanity.

There was a moment in this journey that almost halted this life together, where you both had to address every bleeding crevice. It was a toxic mixture of your denial, and Mike’s instinct to push anyone close to him away.

It’s not that you didn’t want to help Mike, or face reality --- you were afraid. Scared that Mike was hurting himself, and all the progress you both built together was deteriorating at the seams, but then his honeyed words of promises of getting better would wrap your head in a rose-tinted daze.

Mike wasn’t trying to convince you, but himself. Just to chip off on the drugs, to keep himself afloat --- that this time it’ll be okay. He can balance his sanity, and his urges of substance that makes him feel ‘whole’. But that was just a temporary moment of brief delusion.

It was about three months ago, your shift at work was a tiresome blur, bustling on auto-pilot. The soles of your feet were aching, the nape of your back was droning in a dull pinch, and your eyes were slightly burning. Your worn body was screaming, and yearning for the comfort of your soft bed, and just to cuddle in Mike’s arms.

But there was a sense of … queasiness yet gleeful.

For days on end, you were puking in the early hours of the morning, your head hanging in the toilet. Waves of nausea, and finally, the nail in the coffin, you realized that your period was five weeks late. A hunch was hovering over your head, like a burning bright bulb. Finally, biting the bullet, and putting on your big girl pants, during a lunch break, you took a blood-test, and sent a cup of your urine to the labs for testing.

Once the results came back to you a few days later, you were speechless for the remainder of the day.

You were deary with worry, unable to conjure the words to form the discovery of yours. As you parked the car in-front of the house, cutting the engine off with the flick of your wrist, snatching the keys. Living with Mike has become a better part of your life, coming home to a person who loves you, and who would hold you, holding them. Grounding yourself back to earth in warmth, blending into one, melting your worldly problems away.

Reminding that you’re not alone.

With a groan, you weaved out of the car, locking it, and trekked up the walkway to the porch. Arching your arm, as your open-palm was rubbing your tail-bone as you waltzed to the front-door, thanking God and his angels that you were able to leave work early.

Dunking your hand in your bag, fumbling for your house-keys, mumbling under your breath as you blearily tried to conduct the proper way to tell Mike the truth, ansty and yet giddy at the toes --- to tell him you’re pregnant.

You always wanted a family, but over the years, the desired fantasy was slowly being strangled with dwindling hope, never really connecting to any soul --- until now, with Mike. Yawning mindlessly, you inserted a key into the lock, twisting, and opening the door.

“Mike, I’m home. I have something to tell you—” A cheery tone falters into silence.

Your foggy haze of exhaustion was smacked off your face, as you almost nearly stumbled off your own feet. Prejuticle vomit bubbling at the back of your throat, as startled eyes all look into you, you felt like a trespasser in your own home.

Witnessing a mass of people seated in your living room, snorting lines off the now stained and scratched coffee glass table, startled as they drink heavily and sloppily gulps liquor, as fogs of nicotine floods the air — staring at you with wide eyes.

Rooted in the middle sector of the couch, eyes bulging with fear, hot under the collar, was Mike himself, sniffling back remnants of coke deep into his nostrils, bare-chested in his red suspenders, and dress pants.

“That’s just great.” You mutter under your breath, a cracked sigh of breath; your jaw clicking to the side, Mike knows that tic very well. Your arms fall limply to your waist, as a gesture of defeat.

You walk away, exhaustion setting and resting in your bones, as your feet guide you upstairs. Begrudgingly so, an unbearable itch at the back of your throat, dying to just scream on the top of your lungs.

Scream and cry.

You can faintly hear Mike alert his friends to pack up and go, scuffling of footfalls and inebriated murmuring begin to flow out of the house. A few chuckles and finally …. it was silent, with the slam of the front door the only indicator that it’s just you and Mike — finally alone.

Fidgety fingers nearly tear the fabric off of you, tugging it off your body button by button with an edge of boiling rage, and a sheen of tears burning at the brim of your eyes. All the joy slowly zaps slowly out of your pores, now a dreary sadness now weighs on your shoulders.

Have I not done enough? To help Mike? Maybe my help wasn’t enough? Maybe his pain is too deep-rooted in him, maybe he has to push himself first to make the first move for recovery? Has he been lying all this time? Maybe he’s never been sober during the entire duration of the relationship?

You suspected it, felt the energy was off for quite some time, and yet you decided to play the love-sick fool dance the dance of denial.

A watery huff of a sigh. A dulling pain begins to throb and engulf your skull, an impending migraine just beyond the horizon. Clenching your jaw, nearly on the brink of grinding your teeth. A somber treading up the stairs looms near the bedroom, as you strip.

Dreading on what’s to come next, Mike was slowly walking to the bedroom, fearing a fight breaking out, worried that you’re going to leave him once and for all. But isn’t that what you wanted? For her to realize that you’re not good enough? Mike belittles and berates himself, as he is ever so delaying his steps.

Counting his steps like the sheeps to lull him at night, as he tries to collect his thoughts, already his tongue heavy with ale, ready to slur an apology. Trepidation beams at his brow, fearing the worse to come, that you’ll finally leave him.

His open-palm collides silently against the bedroom door, right on cue when he’s ready to push, he hears sniffles. Internally wincing at your pain, but like a bandage, he’s gotta rip it off.

Grovel on his knees, if he has to, kiss your feet like a goddess worshipped at an alter — anything for you not to hate him. Bringing strangers - swirly acquaintances - into your shared home, breaking your trust.

A creak of the hinges alerts you. Quickly wiping away your teary cheeks, you stand at your night-stand in nothing but your panties, straightening your hunched over form as you were sobbing into your folded clothes.

With a firm shove of the drawer, you close it, gripping your nightie in one hand, and the other clenching into a fist that hovers over your heart. Trying to level your breathing, not wanting to scare off Mike, you know that he’s hurting too.

You can feel his stare burning holes in the back of your skull.

“Mike, I’m just going to take a shower and head off to bed.” You turn your body around, now facing his mopey face, wanting desperately to just kiss him, and hug him. “I suggest putting a bottle of water at the night-stand to keep hydrated throughout the night, and a bucket to be precautious.” You force a forlorn smile, as you place the nightie on the bed.

Uncertain feet tap against the flooring, you walk hesitatingly at first, towards Mike, placing your palm on his shoulder, your thumb rubbing against his skin. A kiss on his lips, ever so featherly soft. “I’m not mad. We’ll get through this.” You rub the tip of your nose against his sweetly.

Mike knows you’re not mad, it’s beyond that. Mad is just scratching the surface, his heart aches to see your eyes watery, and nearly splotchy pink at the rims. “I hate it when you do that.” Mike’s hoarse voice makes you flinch, as if it grated against your ears.

“Excuse me?” Your nose scrunches up, as your cheeks puff out. “Hate what exactly, Mike? Me supporting you bothers you?” You move away from him, sniffing back your tears, shaking a little at the hands, the back of your knees collide against the bed, softly thudding yourself against the mattress.

“No. You pretending you’re not mad. Pretending that everything is okay.” His nose flares, his chest heaving. Wanting to scream, for you to scream. Just let it all go. Too much is bottling like a ticking time bomb.

“But I’m not mad.” You hiss through your teeth.

“Yes the fuck you are! Admit it! Stop acting like a martyr for one moment, and just say it! Say how you really feel! Say I’m a junkie!”

“Stop it, Mike! You’re just a little …” You trail off, biting your tongue, before anything stupid or insensitive spills out. Forbidding any word to spew out, and hurt him. No matter how infuriated you are, you just couldn’t lash out at him.

“Like what? Fucked up? News flash, Y/n, I’m fucked up. Stop acting as if you can fix me! You act like I can just pick up my mistakes and move along.” Mike shouts, now pacing, practically burning a hole in the carpeting.

“Shut up! I was going to say high!” You hastily stand up to your feet, “And I’m so fucking sorry, that me loving you is a fucking problem. That I see you as you are, a fucking human being, not some addict. Because that’s not what defines you, but you want it to be. You can’t stand to see yourself as anything but.” You cry, your hands not knowing where to put them at, just shaking in mid-air.

“That’s fucking bullshit!” Mike barks in your face, tears ready to fall down his stubbled cheeks.

“No it’s not!” You stomp your foot, your toes curling into the carpet. “You refuse to let me in! Instead you seek comfort in strangers, come together to get high, and fuck it all!” Your hand weaves in the air, angrily gesturing; harshly slamming against your thigh.

“You don’t even fucking know me!” By now, his nose is connected to yours. He doesn’t know why he’s screaming at you, lashing you with his insecurities, but how you just won’t admit that this isn’t helping you either. You’re hurting too.

Jesus, his brain is muddled. Fried. He wants to cry, and beg your forgiveness for what he has said, fall to his knees and just hold you, but instead, here he is, shouting at you. He doesn’t feel like a man, he feels lower than dirt.

“Then let me get to know you! You only feed me scraps, thinking that can subdue me, I want you to open up to me!”

“Why? So you can get some self-satisfaction by helping a charity case?” Mike growled, it was a watery one. “I told you from day one, I’m not worth it!” Mike thrashes trinkets off the drawer with his hand, products and little figurines collide on the floor with a thud, “You don’t need this shit! You don’t need me!” Mike screams on the top of his lungs, now hunching over, falling on his knees, as you sink into yourself; covering your mouth from sobbing too loud.

Have you been coming off as pretentious? Pushing him to keep positive, kind affirmations every-day, reminding him to eat healthy, telling him he’s great no matter what, hovering over him to keep sober? Hovering too much? Pushing too hard?

But you couldn’t help it … you love him too much.

“But I need you.” It was a pitiful sob, his arched spine quivering, his shoulders tense, his fingers digging into the cotton fibers. Slowly, you kneel down, your fingers tentatively rub between his shoulder blades; Mike savoring the touch of your finger tips against his clammy skin.

Seconds felt like minutes, biting your lip as you kept rubbing and soothing him, it always helped him calm down. Finally he spoke up, and what he will say will break your heart, “Do you know how it feels to wish for death every day?” Mike choked on a sob, his head bobs a bit to sniffle.

Your breath hitches in your throat.

“Baby …” You cry, finally a heavy waterfall crashes down. Holding him, your chest against his sculpted back, “Please talk to me. I don’t want to lose you.” Wet little kisses on him, mumbling, “Please tell me.” Fresh tears water his back.

“I love you too much to pull you down. To my own hell. It’s not right. You’re too pure.” Mike picks his head up, your hands cup his cheeks. Your brows furrowing, shaking your head at him.

“I need you.” You whispered. “I will go to bat in Hell, for you. Sock Satan in the mouth if I have too.” You chuckle, and luckily, he chuckles too with that cute signature Weiss smirk.

“I’m sorry for what I said. I didn’t mean it. I just …” Mike hung his head, sighing. Hating that he lied for months, he was doing good, he was clean for a period of time. But he got hit with a big case, and the stress got too much.

Drugs were easier than asking for help.

“Then why did you keep pushing me away?” You tilted your head, to manage eye contact. You never wanted to push him too hard just to open up to you. Knowing that it only could make him crawl deep inside himself.

“Because I couldn’t bear the idea of you choosing to stay with me out of pity or guilt.” Mike rubs his cheek against yours, “I never had anyone love me, never held anything good.” Mike blubbered.

“I love you for you. Flaws and all. I’m here for the long haul.” Blinking back wet lashes, you lean in more against his face, with a gentle squeeze of his cheeks in the cusp of your hands.

“I love you too.” It was simply sweet. Shy, even. Mike nudges his face against yours, his lips trailing down your pulse point. Your ultimate weakness.

Mike hedges himself at the knees, as he engulfs your nude body in his arms; as you wrap your arms around his neck. You kiss the joint of his jaw, and with ease, Mike lifts you by his palms on your ass, standing upward with you in his grasp.

“Let me take care of you.” You whisper in his ear, “Come take a shower with me.” Caressing your face against his, Mike nodded silently. With quiet steps, and two hearts beating against one, Mike waltzes into the bathroom.

With his fore-arm holding you by the bum, his free hand unzipped himself, the click of his zipper made you quiver underneath your skin. His enchanting warmth shoved your secret in the back burner of your mind, but the journey of it twisting and morphing made you worried — slowly your concern of the possibility of losing the father of your unborn baby was temporarily replaced with touch starvation.

Like a balm to a gashing wound.

It was there but subtle, and quiet. Awaiting it’s time to arise at an unexpecting time, to snatch your heart and squeeze.

The shower was warm and inviting, it helped a little clear Mike’s stuffy sinuses. Your fingers twirling and massaging in Mike’s chest hair, as you both cling onto each other as a life-line. Mike kissed the middle of your brows, as his hands were unwavering from your body.

Silence --- the type that doesn’t need to be filled with unnecessary chatter --- comfortable --- speaking louder than words. His tears blending into the spraying water, and his small tremors were the signs that he was genuinely sorry; and with open arms, you forgive him.

Bathing each other has always been a favorite of yours, so intimate, the soapy sensation of wet skin, the intense eye contact — how perfectly his forehead connects with yours. How soft your touch is against his sex, coddling and cleaning him with care and precision.

Mike rubs the soapy sponge against the terrain of your shoulder blades, trailing down the arch of your spine leaving electric kisses down your spine. A breathy gasp at this welcoming intrusion of Mike seeping the sponge between your asscheeks.

Small lathery cadence intermixing with your wanton moans, as your fingernails scratch slightly against Mike’s back. Mike groaned, it felt so good — the smooth and slippery scratches made him hiss, it was a good pinch of pain.

Cheeky as ever, you slipped your hands to cup his his toned ass; Mike chuckled, mumurming under his breath, his pink lips against your soaked dome, “Greedy brat.” This wasn’t an escape from your issues, clearly both of you need to open the air to discuss your emotions --- a needed shower for two was a nice reprieve from the emotional turmoil.

To clear your heads.

After the shower, and moisturizing, helping Mike into bed, you were braiding your hair, but you were unusually silent. It was time to tell him … now or never. His finger curls against your bare back, fiddling with the thin silk straps against his tips.

You turn your face, your palm holding his fingers. “Tell me what’s on your mind.” Mike spoke quietly, as he laid his back against the headboard. His twirling fingers put you a little ease, but it’s not enough, you have to speak up.

“I have to tell you something …” You trail off, your tone puts him at unease. Your gaze is lowered, Mike shifts his hand away, and perks it underneath your chin.

Making you look at him, with a calm poker-face, Mike insists you, with the soft whisper of your name. Biting your lower lip, his thumb quickly tugging it down. “I’m — I’m pregnant.” Wide eyes gawk into Mike’s own widen orbs, wide as dinner plates.

His breathing got heavy, and soon choppy. You quickly put your hand over his heart, shushing him. “It’s going to be okay. Baby, it’s going to be okay.” A lone tear trails down your cheek, thinking of the worst, you believe Mike is going to bolt out of your life out of fear.

“Is that … ” Mike swallows, “Is that what you wanted to tell me earlier?” His chin wobbles, as you nod, unable to speak. His eyes lower to your flat tummy, hesitantly he cups your belly. His fingers caressing the silk clad skin, he began to cry. Just unraveling in your hold.

That night, you held him tight, and he clung to you tightly; his head laid on your stomach, his tears shedding against your nightie. Mike felt …. scared. Throughout the night, he would mumble that he wasn’t good dad material, but you always tell him, “You’re going to be great.”

That was four months ago, and throughout those four months, Mike was up and down, on and off of drugs, but finally … he stopped. He cried when he first heard your baby’s heartbeat, that’s when he began his rocky path back to sobriety.

Four months of self-hate, sometimes he would leave his journals open for you to read, he couldn’t properly express himself verbally, but in writing, he said it all. He was afraid of the rehab campus’, he preferred your expertise and comfort to nurse him back.

But he couldn’t do this to you, your pregnancy shouldn’t be a stressful one. He knows what he must do.

Mike opened his eyes once more, coming back to reality. Four months and he’s still here. “I’m ready.” His voice was small, yet confident. As if a surge of power consumed his body. His eyes shine with determination.

You were taken back, “Ready for what?” You ask nervously. You bite down on your bottom lip, a little habit you have yet to kick, you would bite your lip till it cracked and bleed.

“To go back to rehab. I gotta do this right.” You hold back a sob, kissing his forehead. “I want to do right for our baby.” Mike weakly smiles, you smile back. You can already envision your shared future, how Mike will protect and love your child. Happy and healthy, no longer fearing the shadow of death lingering near him.

“This baby is so lucky to have you as their daddy.” With the tips of your fingers, grazing his jaw, you lean down for a kiss. It’s a wispy yet passionate kiss. Sending electric waves down Mike’s spine.

“God, I love you.” Mike mumbles against your lips.

Mike Weiss, lawyer, ex-addict, a lover and a father. Oh, how lucky you are to have him, and how blessed he feels to have you.

[amelialincoln]

Notion

“Hey.” Link was breathless as he brought the final bits of outdoor furniture into the kitchen. It was supposed to rain tomorrow and Seattle had become covered in a thick layer of fog that seemed to cling to him as he closed the door to the backyard.

“Everyone headed out?” Amelia asked, scraping the last of the kid’s leftovers into the compost. Link nodded, placing a lingering, cold kiss on her forehead that made her shiver.

“Seemed kinda awkward between Jackson and Winston.”

“Well, it’s not Maggie’s fault that Jackson’s dated every person in a fifty mile radius,” she responded bitterly.

“This is true,” Link nodded.

“What’s going to make things worse is that she’s going to have to explain that all of us are mourning her other ex’s death,” she added grimly.

“No,” Link’s voice was soft. “I thought he pulled through.” 

“Richard just called me to see if I wanted to join a meeting on zoom tonight, everything fell apart and Teddy and Owen couldn’t save him.” Tears were starting to fill her eyes. Deluca hadn’t spent much time on her service recently but he and Sam were pivotal when she was working on Kimmie’s tumor. When it came to her own tumor, she was surprised how much Deluca had shown his support.

“So, he’s just gone?” Unlike Amelia, Link hadn’t experienced a whole lot of death.

“Yeah.” He pulled her into his chest and rocked gently. It almost hurt how nice it was to see the few people that had come over today. Despite the house they were living in being chaos, the couple had never felt more isolated and alone. “I had to tell Zola that Mer might possibly not wake up.” Amelia whimpered. “She was so strong. She doesn’t want to worry Bailey and Ellis so she told Maggie and I not to tell them. If anything happens to Mer, Derek made Kathleen their godmother, I can’t watch these kids get shipped off to New York, they’ve had it hard enough.” 

“I know, babe,” Link sighed, pulling her in closer.

“I have to go feed Scout, my boobs are gonna explode,” Amelia finally shed herself of Link’s arms after a couple of blissful moments. “Can you read to Zola and Bailey? I can handle Ellis because she’ll get like five stories out of you if I let you go in there.” Link chuckled.

“You’re probably right.”

 [][][]

“Auntie Amelia.” Amelia was relieved to be greeted with a sleepy voice as she stepped into the pink monstrosity that was Ellis’ room.

“Hi Elle belle.” She smiled in response to the little girl’s arms reaching towards her. “Come on sweetheart, let's pick some pjs.”

“Can you make it a surprise?” Ellis asked in a way that made Amelia’s ovaries explode and she found herself wondering what Link would think about trying for a girl. Hormones, Amelia, focus. “What about these?” She suggested, holding up a pair of pastel blue Moana pajamas. Ellie nodded happily, squealing as Amelia tugged them over her pudgy arms.

“Can we read the cookie mouse story?”

“Of course,” Amelia grinned. “It’s not like we haven’t read it every day this week.” She lowered herself gently down onto Ellis’ bed. Recovery hadn’t been the easiest when chasing three children around the house and caring for a newborn. Link had pulled out Amelia’s stitches the night before, using his phone’s flashlight, since neither of them wanted to go to the hospital and then go through the trouble of getting tested. She had tried to hide the pain for Link’s sake, tired of him expecting her to be constantly resting, but she hadn’t expected the pain. Link was an incredible ortho surgeon but when it came to the little details, he was sometimes a bit careless.

Amelia closed the door to Ellis’ bedroom as quietly as possible, trying not to chuckle at the little figure sprawled out across her twin bed. For such a small girl Ellis was notoriously known as the most impossible person to sleep with, taking up spaces three times her size. She walked past Zola and Bailey’s room, hearing Link’s animated voice through fits of giggles. He definitely outdid her in the storytelling department, and really in every department, which she tried to not think too much about. Scout was babbling as Amelia entered the familiar room.

“You hungry, big guy?” To Amelia’s relief, Scout had progressed past his grumpy and problematic eating phase. She hugged him into her chest, breathing in his sweet and comforting soft lavender smell from the bubble bath they’d used this afternoon. “My beautiful boy.” She was still in disbelief, even staring down at him in her arms, that he truly existed. As he’d gotten bigger, he’d started to become a perfect combination of his parents. With Link’s strong features, like his nose, and what Amelia could tell would be his jaw, along with her dimple and piercing blue eyes.

“Hey mommy,” Link’s amused voice came from the doorway. “You feeling better?” Amelia wasn’t sure whether he was referring to the soreness in her lower half or the news about Deluca.

“He makes everything better,” she sighed, fumbling with one of the buttons on Scout’s onesie.

“You going to go to that meeting?” Link asked, she could tell he knew something was bothering her. “I already missed it.” She shrugged, glancing at their bedside alarm clock. “I’ll probably just feed him and then pass out.”

“Do you want me to grab the baby wrap, you were lifting lots today already with the furniture.”

“Sure,” she nodded, not feeling like having a conversation about how perfectly fine her arms were. Link nodded, placing a soft hand on her back before rummaging through their closet for the wrap. She was happy to find that Scout latched on easily and without protest, feeling a little guilty about the lack of attention that he’d received today. She knew that people were suffering way more during this time and she couldn’t help but feel guilty for wishing that she, Scout and Link could be spending quality time in their apartment for their maternity leave like planned.

“Lift your arm a bit.” Link ran a soft hand along the side of her forearm as he tied the piece of fabric around her shoulder and managed to wiggle Scout into it, without removing him from her chest.

“Thank you,” she smiled tiredly.

“No problem,” he yawned, practically collapsing into bed beside her. “Fuck, Amelia I’m exhasuted.”

“Me too.” She ran a gentle hand through his hair, tugging out some of the frequent knots that had begun to form since his hair had begun to grow out.

“Is your incision site healing okay,” he groaned into the pillow, melting a bit as she massaged the root of his neck.

“I haven’t checked,” she admitted with a yawn.

“Want me to grab some polysporin?”

“It’s okay, babe, it feels fine.” She sighed slightly, playing with the idea of bringing up a topic that has been bugging her but not wanting to cause an argument that neither of them were up for. “You started drinking pretty early today.”

“Amelia,” Link groaned tiredly. “It’s not a big deal.”

“It was just unnecessary, no one wanted...I’m just worried.” She shifted Scout to the other side uncomfortably.

“It’s not my fault you see addiction everywhere. I had like two beers.” Silence hung thickly in the air and after a couple of minutes Link turned to face her. “I’m sorry. I know it makes you uncomfortable.” 

“You don’t really seem to care,” she answered honestly.

“What’s that supposed to mean?” He replied defensively, tiredness had seemed to leave his body momentarily. “I don’t--”

“The fridge is stocked, Link. It’s like a reminder every time I go to make food. There’s a cooler in the garage for a reason.”

“How am I supposed to know,” he sputtered. “Meredith downs tequila in front of you like this is a frat house. You hang out with our friends when they drink all the time.” 

“It’s different when you're surrounded by people. When I’m alone and just staring at a fridge filled with booze it’s hard to not want to take one.”

“Amelia, you haven’t relapsed in years, why would you even--”

“Because I’m an addict, Link!” The increase in volume of her voice caused Scout to shriek in protest. “Don’t you understand that? It doesn’t get easier. It’s a fight every fucking day. And when my boyfriend starts drinking every day at three o’clock in the afternoon, it makes that fight ten times harder.”

“Well, I’m sorry you feel that way,” he grumbled. 

“Are you serious right now?”

“About what,” he shot back.

“Well, I’m sorry you feel that way. I thought you’d be considerate enough to validate my feelings instead of acting like I’m being dramatic but instead you’re being a child.”

“Mia,” Link groaned, slamming his head back into the pillow, looking as childish as ever. “You’re--”

“What? Overreacting? The fact that you don’t see this as an issue is concerning.” Scout’s shrieking turned into a full on meltdown as their “perfect” son burst into tears. “Oh, baby, no. It’s okay.” Amelia sighed, finding tears of frustration begin to build at the sides of her own eyes and let out a tiny whimper as she held back any sobs that attempted to be heard. Of course Link noticed, as always, and rolled over to witness the upset state that both his girlfriend and baby were in.

“I am sorry,”

“Show me then,” Amelia hissed through a clenched jaw, wiping away some stubborn fallen tears. “Cause right now I don’t believe you.”

“I’ll put the packs in the cooler tomorrow,” he promised, with a hint of resentment. Amelia shrugged, finally giving up on feeding Scout and bringing him tightly into her chest.

“Hey, it’s okay, mommy and daddy fight sometimes, but everything’s going to be okay. Don’t cry Scout. We love you so much,” she murmured into the crown of his head, causing Link to melt a little inside.

“Are we going to be okay?” Link asked, receiving a teary glance from his girlfriend. 

“Not if you can’t get this sorted because I cannot be his mother and also be passed out in a ditch somewhere on opioids.” Link nodded, moving to tug her shirt back into place and took Scout into his own hands, marvelling slightly at the little miracle they had created. “I don’t want to screw him up.” 

“You won’t,” he promised her, pressing a kiss to her forehead before grazing her slightly chapped lips. “You’ve been a mother for a month and have already proved that. That’s the last thing we need to worry about right now.” He patted his chest. “Now come to sleep because if we stay up any longer I feel like I might end up on the couch,” he chuckled. 

“Don’t give me any ideas,” she replied with a yawn. 

“I love you,” he sighed.

“I love you too.” 

what did u guys think of 17x07? i did find the beers at like 12 a bit weird and with the upcoming episode’s synopsis “Jo, Jackson and Link play a drinking game” I wonder if Amelia and him will have a conversation about her addiction bc I feel like they haven't really talked about it. lmk what u think!

[sanghyukstattoos]

Under the covers

Characters: Kim Youngbin x Reader

Genre: Fluff, smut (unprotected sex, fingering, cockwarming)

Words: 1656

Summary: It’s raining and pouring like crazy outside but the two of you are inside and with the weather long forgotten, you began to share stories, your boyfriend delivering each one with a sense of affection and tenderness to his love for you.

A/N: To Blue~~ who requested this, its finally here!!! I’m happy with the way this fic turned out and I hope you feel the same way, so I can’t wait to hear your response! 

Youngbin in this gif with his red hair- Personally, I think he looks good with black- coloured hair but he said that he loves red and he can also pull it off so this gif has me tattered~~~

A small "oo" left your mouth as your eyes widened and eyebrows raised at the sound of distant thunder. Youngbin, to your right found your reaction adorable, his eyes crinkling as he covered his mouth, laughter escaping his shaking body anyways. You were both lying under the covers, resting on your backs trying to get some sleep for tomorrow's day but the weather made it impossible to do so. 

The moment you closed your eyes, the sky would rumble and flashes of lightning would strike, its reflection casting a momentary glare inside your room. Neither of you were terrified of the almost accurate predictions that Alexa would give of 'Tonight's forecast' because it gave you a good chance to share stories. A fair share of workload was placed upon you two, the words flowing easily from your mouth, into the warm comfort of the room. 

During one of your stories, he placed a hand on the small of your back and pulled you closer to him so that you were now face to face with him. In the background, the leaves rustled as the wind picked up its pace, a stark contrast to the calm speed it had trotted at earlier. Staring into his eyes, you asked,

"When is it going to stop, you think?"

"It should probably end in about half an hour but I don't know, I'm not the weather reporter", he replied causing a fit of giggles to erupt from you.

"I'm not that tired though, are you?"

"No, but we can do something"

"What?"

"Let's make love" he said, a hand snaking up to your jaw, gently connecting your lips while the other caught the back of your leg, pulling it over his. Your body was pressed against him and you felt yourself clench, the wetness beginning to pool around your panties making you wonder why you wore them in the first place. No bra caused your perky nipples to poke against his clothed chest, his cock now semi- erect. Moving against your lips, he pulled back waiting for your confirmation, knowing that even if he was already half hard, it wouldn't matter if you didn't want to do it. 

Nodding your head in agreement, you snaked a hand into the waistband of his joggers, grabbing his cock and stroking it in slow, languid motions eliciting a strangled moan from him. Taking that as your agreement, he maneuvered your joggers off your legs and shirt of your chest leaving you naked while he was still completely dressed. A part of you wanted his clothes off of him but it was hot being naked while he was still fully dressed. Despite this thought, you pulled his joggers down and lifted his shirt up which he took off, letting his now erect cock spring free, bouncing against his stomach. 

Pressing a soft kiss to your lips, he shifted your positions so that his torso now covered your frame, hands on either side of your chest. You jolted as his warm hands touched your stomach, moving upwards till he grasped your breasts in his palm, gently tracing the swells and squeezing the flesh in his grasp. Gasping against his mouth, you giggled, watching him watch as your back arched off the bed, shimmying the material over your head to reveal your breasts and clothed pussy. 

HIs eyes lingered on your torso, fingers dancing as they entered your panty, rubbing your folds as the juices coated his fingers. He could also feel the wet stain your wetness had created against his hand, as he rubbed your clit in circles, teasing your entrance with the tip of his fingers. Staring back at you, he penetrated your entrance with his fingers causing you to let out a choked moan into his mouth. Shuddering as his digits plunged into your heat knuckles-deep, his thumb caressed circles into your clit. 

His eyes were soft as he stared at your frame writhing in pleasure under his, letting out moans that resonated against the muffled sounds of the storm outside. You whined as his pace slowed down, leaving your aching pussy and grabbing your thigh, he bought it over your waist and slipped into you causing you to wrap your arms around him and hide in the crook of his neck. 

He placed fluttering kisses along the nape of your neck and back, drawing each one out slowly till he started to thrust inside of you. You could feel his length throb causing you to clench, the tip of his cock touching your womb and filling you whole. Bottoming out, he kneaded your flesh, using it as leverage to quicken his pace, drawing out moans from the both of you. Snapping his hips against yours, the sound of his balls slapping against your pussy filled the room, choked moans leaving your lips.

You looked at him and met his eyes, shaking under the intensity of his thrusts. Your breasts shook, feeling his hands on your ass rubbing the flesh to soothe it from his grip earlier. His hips consistently thrusted into you, filling your wet hole with his cock that leaked and lubed the inside of your pussy. He loved you and there was nothing more beautiful than tracing the swells of your body, admiring the lines of the curves every time you were naked in front of him. You aroused, was possibly one of the hottest happenings he ever knew, ramping up his desire to feel you and pleasure you, to watch you moan and cry out at his touch. Broken moans left your mouth and he knew that you were closer, stroking your cheek as he held you in his arms, ready to come.

A beautiful sight, he slowed down his pace as he came into you, watching your expression turn to desperation, chasing your high. Curling your toes as you felt warm fluids enter your pussy, you clenched around him and gripped his shoulders, pressing a kiss to his neck as his hand shifted from your cheek to the back or your head as you neared your orgasm. Biting your lip, he sped up his thrusts causing you to come at the snap of his hips against yours, your cum flowing around his cock and onto your inner thighs as he slipped out of you.

Leaning over you, he pulled out a pack of wet wipes, bringing your leg over his hips so that he could easily access the mess on your thighs. Running your hands through his hair, he wiped your cum- stained legs, throwing the used wipe in the bin. Caressing the back of your thighs, he gently patted your butt, pulling you over him so that you were now rested on top of him. Legs on either side of his hips, you encircled his neck whispering a little, "Love you" in his ear to which he replied, "I love you too baby". A blush rising to your cheeks, you could see the pinkish tint to his as well, chucking as a smile lit his face, content that his baby was happy.

You were both under the blankets, feeling warm and so you threw them off with a kick, breathing as you felt the cold air hit your legs. Surprised, Youngbin took a peek confused at the sudden chill and seeing his reaction made you smile. He wrapped his legs around yours as the two of you laid there, closing your eyes at the blissful feeling that overcame you. He softly played with the strands of your hair, running his fingers through the ends and gently ghosting his fingers on your back. ‘’I have an idea’’ he spoke, catching your attention making you raise an eyebrow, motioning for him to continue. ‘’It requires us to go to the bathroom’’ he followed as his eyes rested on the bathroom door and you looked over replying, ‘’That’s a really long way from where we are right now’’. 

You rested your head on his chest as he let out a laugh, tiredness overcoming you and noticing this, asked, "Feeling tired?" and you nodded, hearing him say, "But we have to clean up". This made you pout but you knew that you couldn't go to sleep like this so you slowly got up and took his hand in yours saying, "Okay, let's go but if I fall asleep, you have to carry me!" which made the two of you laugh knowing that another round was on the rise, this time even more softer and gentler- if that was possible. Entering the bathroom you held his hand as you checked the temperature of the water, waiting for it to warm up. When it did, you filled the tub making sure that the surface was warm enough to lay on and got in, settling in the middle. 

Holding the sides of the tub, he got in, sitting comfortably as you turned to face him and straddle his legs, hands immediately moving to hold your waist and steady you. This time, he stroked his cock while you rubbed your clit, skimming over your folds as you stared at one other. Swiping a bead of precum that dripped out of his slit, he licked your nipple, his warm breath fanning your breast causing his arousal to heighten and his cock to stand upright. Positioning your entrance over his cock, he entered as you went to grip his shoulders feeling your arousal leaking from your pussy. He held you as the bathtub filled with water, leaning over to switch it off but his cock shifted inside of you and held back a moan, only releasing a whimper into his ear. He chuckled at your reaction and sat back, holding you in his arms and closing his eyes as your heat caused his cock to twitch inside of you. Neither of you knew if you could keep this up for very long but you would definitely try.

[captain-yeet]

Seeking Sanctuary (Demetri Volturi x Reader One-Shot)

Request by @like-rain-or-confetti

Summary: Life had been going right down the gutter for Y/N - even more so now that a crazed vampire had taken an interest in her. Her home is no longer safe. So she turned to the one she knew she could trust with her life.

Prompt: “I didn't know where else to go.”

Word Count: 1.36k

Warnings: Mentions of being stalked, anxiety, angst.

Author Notes: THIS WAS FUN AS HECK and the prompt request made my day! I don’t get those often so I’m hyped for this one in particular. Bless you for requesting this prompt because I’m a sucker for this exact thing.

When life gives you lemons they say you can make lemonade from it. You doubted that you could make any light of the situation you were in or something of use that could bring you joy when life threw an insane vampire who thought you were a reincarnation of their long lost mate at you.

In fact, life had been very hectic for you lately. Work life wasn’t going so great, and you found yourself feeling demotivated and losing interest in things you typically enjoyed.

You had become rather depressed, and the insane vampire stalker was your tipping point.

With red puffy eyes from crying your heart out, you packed what you could into a large suitcase and backpack; clothes, things you used daily, things you didn’t want to dare part with. Looking around your home, you held back a sob as you gingerly closed and locked the door, and proceeded to leave the place you once thought was your safe haven.

With dumb luck and a one-way flight to Italy booked, you hoped that he wouldn’t turn you away. If anyone was capable of helping you, it was him. 

After all, it was either this or let yourself get killed or turned into an immortal being against your will. And you didn’t want to die. Not yet. And certainly not by some crazy asshole’s hand.

Once you arrived in Italy, you made way for Volterra, armed with a cell phone and a teeny little Italian translation book at your disposal. You called ahead to the Volturi’s receptionist line that Demetri had once given you, in case you needed to contact him, to alert them of your impending arrival.

Ah, Demetri. The man in question. Your relationship with him was strictly platonic but you felt some underlying tension between the two of you. No anger or negative feelings... just, something else. You could feel the two of you had chemistry together but you chalked it up to you being wooed by the supernatural good looks.

You’d met him through a mutual friend of a friend who happened to be a doctor at some hospital in Forks, Washington and from the first moment you saw him you found him captivating. He was kind to you, he spoke to you like you were on equal footing, and there was something about him that you just couldn’t put your finger on that made you feel connected to him.

You hoped he would be able to help you. 

You were out of options at this point.

The stalking had escalated to a frightening point to where you realized that no cop - no human - could help you. You’d wake up in the night and windows would be open that you swore you shut. At first, you thought you were simply forgetful and forgot to shut them yourself... until one night where once again, they were open only instead this time, you found a bouquet of roses and a lengthy love letter going into explicit detail of your stalker’s intentions.

How he planned to “court you”, how you reminded him so much of his long lost love from so long ago, and most importantly, how he planned to “whisk you away to live in bliss for eternity.”

Fuck. That.

You checked into a hotel nearby and dropped off your belongings there before setting out to find Demetri. It was the dead of night and you found yourself in some kind of plaza, looking around you trying to get your bearings. A slight drizzle of rain gently falling on your head. “Okay, I need to think. Tower in the Palazzo dei Priori. Is this it?”

You came to a stop in front of said tower, hand hovering over the old wooden doors. Were you supposed to knock? What was the protocol for visiting the literal vampire government?

While you dilly-dallied on what to do the door opened, and the face you came to see was before you. “Y/N, what are you doing here?” Demetri asked with a mix of concern and surprise on his face.

 “I um,” you paused to swallow back the emotions bubbling to the surface in your throat, “I need your help. I - I’m sorry for appearing like this.”

Concern won over his surprise, and Demetri took off his jacket and wrapped it around your wet frame. “You’re alright,” he soothed you, ushering you indoors and out of the rain. 

If not for his arm firmly around you, you felt as if you would completely disassociate from reality. His presence was what you needed and it grounded you enough to be able to move your legs forward as Demetri lead you somewhere in the castle.

 “It really is like a castle in here,” you murmured quietly to yourself, taking in your surroundings as the two of you walked, missing him shoot you a frightened look as you continued to stare blankly ahead.

Finally coming to a stop, Demetri opened a door and brought you into a large, spacious bedroom that could pass for a condo. Leading you to a couch, he sat you down and then sat next to you, taking your hands in his gloved ones. “Tell me what’s happened, love.”

It all came out in a rush. “Just - everything has gone wrong,” you whimpered, feeling pathetic. “Things at my workplace have been chaotic and causing me a lot of stress, more so than usual. Now there’s some vampire who’s been stalking me and won’t leave me alone -”

 “Hold on, you’re being stalked by a vampire?” Demetri’s eyes narrowed dangerously, and you swore his eye color darkened.

You weakly nodded. “He thinks I’m some reincarnation of his dead ex or something. I knew you would probably be the only one able to help me... you’re a vampire too, so I thought...” Trailing off, you closed your heavy lids and sighed as your worn out emotions and the travel caught up to you. God I am so tired.

 “You did the right thing coming here. Your human police aren’t equipped to stop someone like us - especially a mad vampire. Here’s what we’re going to do; I’m going to ask a friend of mine to collect your things from whichever hotel you’ve checked into and have them brought here to my room. You will stay here until this menace has been dealt with.”

Your eyes fluttered open, anxiety filling your mind and your stomach. “But your - the leaders of this place, they’d be upset if a human -”

Demetri shushed you, reaching out to stroke your hair gently. “I’ll deal with that. Do not worry about it.”

 “I’m sorry if I cause you any trouble, Dem,” you sighed, letting slip the nickname you’d affectionately bestowed on the centuries-old vampire, eyes closing once more as the exhaustion began to take hold of you, “I just wanted to feel even a little bit safe. My own home wasn’t safe anymore and honestly? I didn’t know where else to go.”

No response from Demetri. Instead, you felt the couch you were sitting on disappear from beneath you briefly as sturdy arms wrapped themselves around your body, before being laid out carefully onto something soft and comfortable. As you nestled in more you clicked Demetri had probably put you into his bed.

And boy was it the comfiest bed you’d ever laid down in. It was what you imagined a cloud to feel like.

 “No one is going to lay a hand on you Y/N,” you heard Demetri say to you with conviction, his fingers finding their way into your hair once more to tuck a stray strand behind your ear. “Not on my watch.”

You hummed in reply, a small tiny smile on your face. “You’re a good man, Demetri,” you breathed, “I’m very lucky.”

His quiet laughter was the last thing you heard as your consciousness faded, along with what you swore was, “It’s me that’s the lucky one, cara mia.”

And as your consciousness left you, you felt a little safer knowing that you had someone in your life who would protect you from this insane vampire no matter what. A little piece of sanctuary in this scary time of your life.

[ranposlittle]

hey sweetie I noticed I haven’t requested chuuya🥺please maybe some fluff nsfw imagine with daddy chuuya calming down his s/o bc she is scared of storm 🥺

!! NSFW !!

A/N: One serving of Mr. Fancy Hat coming right up! Here you go! (ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*.✧ I had fun writing this as gender neutral as I can and honestly, I think this is really cute uwu~ Also kinda inspired from the scene in the Onsen Drama CD where Chuuya counted to ten with Akutagawa while he dipped in the water. I hope this is to your liking! 💕

***

Chuuya had tried everything.

He already made you hot coco, a blanket fort, read you a story, counted unicorns with you, promised you a hundred times that the lightning won’t struck you because his “magic” will stop it, and he even sang you that song with silly dance steps, but nothing seems to work. The storm just keep on getting stronger by the minute and your fear growing along with it. Everything that helped you calm down before isn’t working anymore.

Another loud cracking of the thunder made you yelped and jumped from where you are laying inside the blanket fortress he made for you.

“Come here, baby,” Chuuya said, extending his arm and wrapping them around you. “There. You’re safe,” He pulled up a thick blanket to your shoulder and stroked your hair while he thinks.

He’s got to come up with something else to help you. It’s got to be something that will calm you from the sound of the harsh rain and the thunders, something that can put you to sleep in an instant so you can rest your weary little head.

Thinking about it, he only have one option left that he knows could work.

“Hey, baby,” his voice low and soothing. You looked up at him. “Why don’t we count down again, hmm? Once you reach ten, you won’t hear the scary sounds anymore.”

“But we already tried-”

“I know, baby, but this one is going to be different. I promise.”

You wrinkle your forehead and casted him a doubtful look. Chuuya gave you a confident smile and wiggled his eyebrows, making you giggle. You closed your eyes and started counting, trying to focus despite of the rain starting to roar again.

“One~” Your singsong voice blending in with Chuuya. “Two~ Three~”

“Four~” Chuuya’s voice disappeared and you frowned.

“Five…” when you didn’t hear his voice again, you slowly peeped your eyes open only to see his face closing in on yours.

Six.

Chuuya’s hands ran down your sides and rested on your waist as his lips weaved into yours. He pulled you closer, his body heat warming you up even more. He slowly grind against you and you reciprocated his action, moaning softly on his lips.

Seven.

You wrapped your arms around his neck, pressing your chest against his to further deepen the kiss. The grumbling of the thunder drowned out of your consciousness as Chuuya swirl his tongue on yours.

Eight.

Chuuya’s hand traveled underneath your clothes and you shiver as his cold fingers trailed on your skin, leaving goosebumps on its wake.

Nine.

Wind gusted outside the bedroom window as you tangled your fingers in his hair. You lightly bit on his lower lip emitting a moan of approval from Chuuya.

Ten.

The kiss lingered on a swelling suction before the both of you pulled yourselves off from each other. You opened your eyes and gazed at the calm blue of Chuuya’s.

“See? No more scary sounds. You didn’t even flinched from the thunder just now,” Chuuya said, smiling at you and stroking your head.

He’s right. You can still feel the air around you still charged from the shockwaves.

“Wow! Daddy’s magic really does work,” you sweetly praised him. The rain continues to pitter-patter on the roof but your bright smile warmed Chuuya’s heart like a sunshine.

“Yeah,” Chuuya said in an unimpressed tone. “But I wasn’t able to make the storm disappear just yet. So why don’t you sleep now and I’ll make sure it’s gone before you wake up.”

“But…” Your lower lip protruded.

“But what, baby?”

“But I’m too excited to sleep now,” you mumbled, your eyes refusing to meet his as you play with his shirt. “Besides, if the thunder comes back, I’ll just get scared again. So, maybe we’ll just have to kiss until I fall asleep.” Your voice trailed off as you get more embarrassed while voicing out your request.

Chuuya laughed and you buried your face on his chest to hide your blushing face. He squeezed you tightly for a moment and expressed how adorable you are. He cupped your face and kissed your forehead. “I have something better in mind, though. Turn around for me, baby.”

You did as what you are told and leaned your back against his chest. He scoot closer to you and adjusted himself so that one of his arms is underneath your armpit and the other slithered around your waist. You laughed as he placed tickling kisses on your neck while pressing you closer to his body. But it wasn’t long until your giggles turned into soft moans as Chuuya slid his hand in between your legs and started rubbing you. You threw your head back as he touch you over your shorts, giving him more access to your neck and his kisses turning into a more lustful ones. Your hand reflexively held on his forearm as his hands moved faster.

“Daddy… That’s good…” Your low whisper almost inaudible over the sound of raindrops rapping outside.

“This will relax you really good, baby. I know how fast you fall asleep after you come,” Chuuya answered, his hot breath fanning on the nape of your neck and he licked the shell of your ear before resuming his business on your neck. “Let daddy make you come, okay?”

You bit your lower lip and nodded. Chuuya grabbed your shorts, pulling it down just enough to slide his hand inside your underwear. His dainty fingers already working on your downfall. A thunder cracked somewhere but you pay it no mind as a storm of some sort also started to brew within you.

As Chuuya continues to play with your genital like an instrument, his other hand made its way to your chest. Brushing your nipples with his thumb and rolling it with his index finger ever so often. The sound of the storm outside is now being replaced with your sweet mewls and Chuuya’s inviting moans. The movements of his fingers underneath you, the small but incredible waves of pleasure from your buds and his relentless attacks on your neck clouded your mind, just like how the gray clouds occupied the sky earlier before it began pouring. In your case too, the bliss being carried by the clouds in your head began to feel heavy as it threaten to pour down.

Your closed eyes squeezed as Chuuya lightly pinched on your most sensitive nipple and a cry of satisfaction escaped your mouth. You feel your fluids flow out of you as his fingers continue to work diligently for your pleasure. It’s starting to get too much as Chuuya’s hand beneath you picked up its pace and deepen the pressure on your aroused muscles.

“Da–ddy! Ah~!” Your nails digged on his skin as your grip on his forearm tightened.

“Are you close, baby? That’s it, just feel good,” he said softly, his words vibrating on your neck.

You felt Chuuya’s toned arms tensed and relax respectively as he switched his speed on your sex from fast, slow and torturously slow. Your pleasure spiking higher every time he’ll go fast after the snail-like pace. You squirm beside him as you feel your body getting charged with electricity like a lightning ready to strike any time. Your lips quiver as you struggle to speak, wanting to let Chuuya know that your head is spinning around in absolute pleasure and the storm inside you is about to unleash.

“It’s okay, baby. You can come,” Chuuya said, perfectly knowing what your unintelligible whimpers mean. “You’d like that, don’t you? Go ahead and come.”

Chuuya craned his head as he watched your face contort in lustful expressions he had always loved. He smirked as he admire your disheveled form, squirming and whining helplessly against him. He held you tightly in place as his hand below you went even faster and slower alternately.

“Da– ah!” You cried out as another shock of pleasure jolted on your body, pushing you further to the end.

Your ecstatic whimpers and moans resounding all throughout the makeshift walls of your blanket fort. The pleasure building up with every stroke of Chuuya’s fingers until your body can’t deny itself anymore.

“Chuuya,” you absentmindedly mumbled. Your fingers gripping on his arm pressed further in a bruising pressure as you say his name like a prayer. “Chuuya. Chuu– ya– ah! Ah! Chuuya!”

And as if a lightning flashed behind your eyelids, your whole vision turned white as your orgasm struck you down. Your back arched and your senses numbed, completely taken over by the breathtaking explosion of your satisfaction. Your body spasmed from the shock of the strike, your shivering cries resembling the cracks of thunder as you steadily come down from your climax. Your vision cleared and so is your senses, Chuuya’s hand still slowly caressing you as he listens to your quiet pants like a distant roll of thunder moving away to another site.

“That’s it,” he chuckled lightly. “Good girl. That’s a good girl.” Chuuya peppered your face with kisses as he waits for your body to settle down. Your fingers loosened on his arm, leaving red marks on its place on his skin. Chuuya nuzzled his face on your neck as he whisper words of appraisal for your excellent job in orgasming. He pulled out his hand out of your underwear, his fingers still wet from your discharge. You closed your heavy eyes as Chuuya fix your shorts back to its position on your hips and adjusted himself once again to wrap you in a cuddle.

“Daddy, I’m…” you mumbled, almost half-asleep. “So. Tired.”

Chuuya stroked your hair and kissed your head. “Alright, baby. Go to sleep. I’m here to take care of you.”

“Thanks,” you exhaled as your whole body relaxed on his embrace, the rain almost muted as it falls as gently as it can, as if respecting your need for rest.

Your consciousness continued to dip into slumber and as you drift off, you can hear the faint humming of Chuuya along with the gentle stroke of his hand on your hair. You smiled on your sleep as the skies began to calm and the moon shined again.

[ugly-crying-over-bucky-barnes]

Promises Not Kept Part 21

Summary: Tommy Shelby made a promise to Jonah Ward while in the war. A promise he didn't keep. But it comes to haunt him when he tries to drown out his sorrows with a young woman.

Part 21: Everything seems alright if only just for a moment. 

  It was so easy to block out all the noise from the reception below. Once the door of the bedroom was closed, Tommy and Leah cast aside the outside world. In that space and in that moment, they were the only things remaining.

           Leah hastily worked at undoing the buttons of his suit. Her worries about keeping their guests waiting weren’t even in the back of her mind. She simply wanted to express her physical love for her husband.

           But Tommy set the pace. His fingers wrapped around her wrist to slow her down. Kissing her languidly, he murmured affectionate words against her lips. “So beautiful. So fucking beautiful.”

           “Please…” Leah gasped softly.

           He didn’t relent and kept his steady pace. Taking his time, making her wait. “Turn around.”

           She did so without hesitation. A soft sigh slipped off her lips when she felt his hands carefully undoing the ties of her dress. Every touch was lasting, burning through the fabric and just kissing her skin. Her toes curled when she felt Tommy’s breath on her bare shoulder. His lips grazing over the skin. He paused beside her ear. Playfully tugging at her lobe with his teeth before whispering to her.

           “You’re mine, Leah.” His deep voice had her reeling with lust. “No other man will ever touch you this way again. Only I’ll get to see you like this. Undone.”

           “Tom,” She whimpered. “Please don’t tease me any longer, please.”

           “Say it.”

           Leah knew what he wanted her to say. “I’m yours, Tommy. Forever.”

           In a flash, he grabbed her by the waist and turned her so she was facing him again. But this time, she stopped him before he could kiss her.

           “Now you say it.” She wrapped her arms around his neck. “Say it, Tommy.” His lips parted, small pants of want all he could muster. “Say it.”

           He groaned with desire and pulled her flush against him. “I’m yours.”

           “No other woman will touch you the way I touch you. Make you feel the way I do.” She ghosted her lips over his jaw causing a sharp jolt of electricity to travel down his spine.

           “Yes.” He responded. It was difficult to hide the breathiness in his voice. He was too far gone to even attempt it.

           “Then take what’s yours.”

           Tommy didn’t need to be asked twice. He picked her up and brought her to the bed they shared. He pressed into her, letting her feel his weight. One hand hitched her thigh up to his hip, simply rocking together as they kissed.

           Leah was dizzy with desire. For as many times as he’d kissed her before, somehow the feeling still overwhelmed her.

           Tommy pushed himself up so he could get rid of the rest of his clothing. After he tugged his undershirt over his head, Leah saw the fresh bandages that still covered his side. Though it had been some time since his confrontation with Alfie on the beach, he was still healing.

           Wordlessly, his wife grazed her fingers down his abdomen. Just barely touching the edges of the white gauze. She traced back up, dipping between the planes of his ribs and flattening her hand over his chest. Her palm resting over his tattoo. “This is the end of this, Tom.” She whispered. “No more. I can’t take you getting hurt again.”

           He didn’t look away from her even if he couldn’t outright promise her he would never get harmed again. There were far too many people who would love to get a crack at him. “I’ve got more important things to focus on.” He responded, hoping it was enough to keep her satisfied on their wedding day.

           A soft smile spread across her face. “Like?” She prompted.

           “Like raising a family with you.” He lowered down, leaning on his elbows. “How’s that sound, aye?” His nose brushed over her jaw, his hair tickling her cheek.

           She squirmed with want and looped her arms around his neck. “That sounds nice.”

           He drew back to give her a devilish smirk. “Then I’ve got to get you pregnant, Mrs. Shelby.” He replied coyly.

           His wife giggled and chewed on her lip. “Cheeky boy.” She accused before attacking him with kisses.

~~~~~~

           As they attempted to reassume their put-together look of wedded bliss, Leah and Tommy lingered in the bedroom.

           “So I was thinking about things we could do while you’re taking a break.” She said from her spot at the vanity, trying to fix her hair as best she could.

           Tommy was sat on the bed putting on his cufflinks and arm garter. “Yeah, any ideas?”

           “Well, I know how much Charlie would love to take the horses out. Find somewhere to picnic. I think you ought to take him out riding at least every other day. It would make him so happy.”

           “Yeah, alright, I will.” He nodded in agreement. Spending time with the horses and his son sounded relaxing enough.

           “And of course you can go hunting. Maybe even try to golf? Sort of posh but…” She laughed softly and shrugged. “You owe it to yourself to relax.”

           The idea made Tommy absolutely sick to his stomach. But he faked a complacent look as he stood up. “Be nice to try new things.” Of course, he wanted to try new things. Wanted to try his hand in politics. Wanted to show those rich bastards that a workingman could speak just as eloquently as they could. Wanted to see changes he pushed for put into action.

           But he wasn’t meant to be doing anything while on his holiday.

           Tommy stood behind Leah at the vanity, resting his hands on her shoulders. She glanced up at him in the mirror. “I can’t tell you how happy I am right now.” She touched his hand. “Not only being married but…but being able to see you relax for the first time well…ever.”

           The smile on his face was detached. Still, he bent down to kiss her cheek. “Take your time getting ready, I’ll stall for you.” He murmured and went to leave the bedroom. He was surely going to be sick if he had to keep talking about the holiday he was dreading.

~~~~~~~~~

           And things were okay for about a month. Tommy and Leah bickered a little bit about the duration of his holiday. Eventually, she convinced him to wait out the summer. Three months of doing nothing but relaxing. No work. No business. No politics. Nothing.

           Tommy was grateful for the memories he’d made in that first month. Charlie and Leah kept him busy enough that he didn’t feel like he was sitting around and twiddling his thumbs.

           Together they took long rides out into the pastures. Charlie’s little pony tied up alongside Tommy’s gelding. Sometimes they went out to the stream that fed into a crystal clear pond or up to the glens to find the perfect meadow.

           On shorter trips, they took Cyril along who liked to romp around the tall grass, chasing butterflies and rabbits in the thicket.

           On a particularly sunny afternoon, the three, plus Cyril, went out to the pond. It was a warm day so they decided to take Charlie so he could swim. For a brief moment, Tommy was serene.

           He lounged in the grass by the pond, legs outstretched, resting on his elbows. Cyril was sat near him, the mastiff paying close attention to Leah and Charlie. Leah had hitched up her skirt so she could wade into the water with Charlie who was swimming around like a little frog. He kept chirping at her to watch as he practiced ducking his head underwater. Leah praising the little guppy every time he resurfaced with a triumphant grin.

           The hazy summer day felt like a romantic dream. The opening of a novel or a play. When everything was just perfect and airy. The mesmerizing blues and greens of the lush forest sparkling with mystique. The sun reflecting off the water and shining a façade. The laughter of his son and wife sounded too melodious. They appeared to glow in the summer shine.

           Something in Tommy’s gut twitched. His forehead creased and he looked down at his hand resting in the dewy grass. It was shaking.

~~~~~~~~~

          “Frances?” Leah called into the other room.

           “Yes, Mrs. Shelby?” The maid entered the doorway.

           “Is Tommy still out fishing?” She checked the clock a second time. Her husband had been due to be home half an hour ago. He’d promised that they would all have lunch together on the lawn. When he left, he seemed to be in a daze but Leah assumed he would keep his promise and arrive home at the time they agreed on.

           “No, Mrs. Shelby. I haven’t seen him arrive home. Should I ask one of the stable boys to go and fetch him?” Frances asked politely.

           “No need.” Leah stood and set aside the letter she was writing. “I’ll go get some fresh air, it’s not too long of a walk.”

           “It’s a bit chilly out, let me fetch your coat.”

           “Oh,” Leah stopped her before she left. “fetch one of Tommy’s riding coats, I don’t want to get any of mine dirty. It’s awfully damp out there.”

           “Yes, ma’am.”

~~~~~~~~

           The walk to the pond took Leah around the back of Arrow House’s property and into the trails. She often took walks on them with Charlie, so she was familiar with the route. Although it wasn’t raining out, there was a heavy damp feeling to the air. The sun had barely made an appearance all day but Tommy still insisted on going out. After all, he was meant to be relaxing.

           But Leah could tell he was on edge. Strangely, even more so than when they were all under threat from Luca Changretta. It obviously seemed backward, but Polly mentioned the possibility of a change in Tommy’s demeanor. So Leah did her best to watch for the signs and act accordingly. He was entering his third month of holiday. But Leah couldn’t see how that would contribute to his uneasy behavior. How could anyone on a break get so anxious?

           Leah arrived at the pond and found Tommy still there. He noticed her coming but didn’t stand to greet her. His eyes stared out across the marshy pond, glazed over in deep thought.

           “Caught anything?” She asked softly.

           His head barely shook to the side to answer.

           Leah touched his shoulder and cleared her throat. There was tension radiating from him but she couldn’t understand why. He was simply sitting there, sitting by a peaceful pond, no enemies holding guns at his head. No danger in sight. “You’ve gone quiet the last few days. I’ve been worried.”

           The muscles in his jaw flexed but he still didn’t say anything.

           “Tommy, if there’s something bothering you…”

           He heard it before she did. And he heard it differently than she did.

           Planes.

           German planes.

           German bombers.

           Tommy reacted quickly. He grabbed Leah by the waist and dropped them both to the ground. Tucking his head under his arm, he braced for the impact.

           Leah hardly could react in time. “Tommy!” She pushed him off. “Tommy, they’re just hunters!”

           His ears stopped ringing when he heard another gunshot. Then another accompanied by the cheerful rejoicing of hunters and a bark of hounds. Slowly, he released his hold on Leah.

           She stood up in disbelief. “What the hell was that all about?” She demanded and took in her now mud-covered dress.

           Dazed, Tommy looked around and then up at her. He tilted onto his side and remained there for a second. “I heard planes.” He whispered.

           Leah looked up at the gray sky. “Well, I hardly think there are any planes flying that low.”

           He shook his head. “Bombers. I heard bombers.” The soldier stood up and held out his hand. “I’ve got the shakes now.” He’d known for weeks now. Couldn’t seem to get control of it even when he dug his fingernails into his palm or sat on his hands. Still, he had yet to tell Leah about it.

           His wife took his hand, resting it gently over her palm. Indeed, his hand was trembling violently beyond the man’s own control. “I’ll call the doctor.” Her irritated tone softened. “He’ll be able to see you on Monday. Maybe sooner if you need it.”

           “Don’t need a doctor.” He muttered and began to pack up his fishing gear.

           “I’ve heard about this, men who came back from the war suffer…”

           Tommy cut her off. “Don’t need a doctor.” He repeated in an icy tone and turned his back to her.

           Leah wrinkled her nose and crossed her arms over her chest. “So now you’re not going to listen to me at all?” She kept at him even when he gathered everything and started walking down the trail. “Even though I’m your wife and I’ve got every right to be worried about you?”

           His strides were much longer than hers and he didn’t slow his pace. Instead, she had to jog a few steps to keep up with him. “Leah, I’m not having this conversation. Forget about it.”

           “Forget about it? I’ve heard you up all hours of the night. You drink all day and all night. You’re always angry!” She snapped and slogged her way through the muddy path to catch up. “Charlie’s terrified you’ll be upset with him. He asks after you because he has no clue what’s gotten into you. Neither have I!”

           “Leah…” Tommy spoke her name in a warning tone but didn’t stop or slow down.

           “I’ve been dreaming about this for weeks, being able to relax and live without the worry of being killed. But now you’ve changed so much and you won’t even talk to me!” She wouldn’t relent. Too many times she’d sat back and stayed quiet. No more. Polly had given her more than enough wisdom on how to deal with a Shelby man at his worst.

           So she stopped in the middle of the path. “Thomas Michael Shelby you fucking stop and speak to me this instant!” She shouted.

           Tommy’s gait stuttered. It was so seldom that Leah raised her voice that it caught him off guard. But it didn’t relieve the building tension inside. So he kept walking and left her there.

~~~~~~~~

           It was a good thing Arrow House had so many rooms. Because Leah did not want to be in the same room as Tommy for at least the rest of the day. She was already deciding which room to sleep in because damned if she wanted to sleep in the same bed after what he’d done that morning.

           To spare Charlie, she did her best to conceal her anger. There was no need for the little boy to worry about both of his parents.

           But when Charlie asked where Tommy was, Leah instructed him to go find him. She stayed behind, tidying up his room so she wouldn’t have to see her husband.

           Not much time passed before Leah heard glass shattering. She got up and hurried into the hall, worried Charlie might’ve fallen and hurt himself. Instead, the little boy was rushing upstairs in tears.

           “Something’s wrong with daddy.” He whimpered.

           “Oh dear.” Leah mumbled under her breath and scooped Charlie up. “He’s alright, poppet, he’s just…sad.” She walked downstairs to find Mary so she could watch after the trembling child.

           Another loud noise came from the big room and when Leah stormed in, she was met with a disaster. Self-Destructive chaos that Tommy inflicted on himself. Several glasses had shattered on the ground. Some books and papers were knocked off the desk that Tommy was using to try and stay upright.

           No matter how much he drank, he did have a limit. And it appeared he had reached that limit about three glasses of whiskey ago.

           Not noticing Leah’s entrance, Tommy fell to his knees, gripping his hand. He let out a sob and hunched over. Such a powerful man with such an air of confidence had resulted in nothing but a drunken mess on the floor.

           It stabbed Leah right in the heart to see him in such a state. She didn’t think he was stupid or being silly. He was hurting.

           “Tommy, what’ve you done?” She sighed and picked her way over the broken glass to get to him. She knelt down and reached for his hand.

           “Lee…” He groaned and lurched forward a little.

           She let him lean on her shoulder and grabbed his injured hand. The broken glass had sliced open his palm and blood was beginning to trickle down his pale skin. “Goodness.”

           “Doesn’t hurt.” He slurred and slumped against her shoulder. “Can’t feel it. Can’t feel anything.”

           Leah pinched his arm making him yelp. “You feel that? That’s your bloody wife about to take care of you.” She said firmly. “Now sit still and wait. Don’t be touching anything else.”

           With some help, Tommy leaned against the back of his desk, legs outstretched and slouching like a petulant child. But he obeyed and stayed put while Leah grabbed a cloth to apply to the cut.

           The two of them sat surrounded by glass in the rich carpet. The sunlight was starting to fade and they were left in darkness soon enough.

           “M’sorry, Lee,” Tommy whispered after his wife grabbed a bit of gauze to wrap around his hand.

           “Don’t apologize. You can apologize to your son in the morning when you’re sober.” She replied tersely.

           He nodded sloppily and let his eyes slide shut, his head resting against his desk. “D’you still love me?”

           Leah scoffed. “That’s a ridiculous thing to ask, Thomas. And now’s not the time.”

           “Do you?” He didn’t seem to hear how peeved off she was.

           “Of course I still fucking love you.” She huffed. “If I didn’t love you then I wouldn’t be here putting your pieces back together, now would I? If I didn’t love you then I’d’ve taken your Bentley and disappeared. But I’m still here, aren’t I?”

           “Yeah.”

           Finishing with a knot in the gauze, she let Tommy’s hand go limp in his lap. “I don’t know what goes through that big brain of yours.” Her eyes were steady on him. “But I know that you’re hurting. And you can’t continue to live this way. Maybe I’m not the person who can help but I need you to know that I’m always here for you.”

           He grumbled in response and leaned forward, burying his face in the crook of her neck. She wrapped her arms around him and cradled him close.

           “It’s okay to be hurt, Tommy.” She soothed. “It’s okay to cry, it’s okay to have emotions. It’s okay not to be okay.”

           He shuddered against her, the substances in his blood causing him to lose the calm demeanor he was so proud to keep even in the worst of situations. Years of suppressing emotions had finally caught up to him. He was able to ignore them in the fast-paced life he kept. The life or death situations keeping the dark thoughts at bay.

           But after three months of living quietly, he couldn’t continue pushing them away. The things that haunted him, creeping over his shoulder and whispering in his ear, were now standing in front of him and screaming in his face. The men he watched die, the earth burying him, the song they all sang together, the sound of the enemies approaching. The men he had killed. Grace’s death. The moment he realized Leah and Charlie had been taken.

           Tommy’s fingers curled around Leah’s shoulders, gripping onto her. “It’s too much.”

           “Sh, let me take it then. Let me handle it. For a moment.” She whispered and pressed her lips to his hair. “Give all the thoughts, all the burdens to me.

~~~~~~~~~~~~

           After reassuring Charlie that everything was okay, Leah got Tommy to bed. She practically had to undress him; he was still thoroughly fucked up by the whiskey. But eventually she got him under the covers and he passed out seconds after hitting the pillow. Before long, he was snoring away.

           Leah stayed up reading, her hand gently rubbing Tommy’s back as he slept. She was emotionally exhausted after the day. It scared her seeing him so out of control. But there was little she could do to put him back together. That was up to him. All she could was be there for him and try to support him.

           With a sigh, she realized she wasn’t really absorbing any of the words on the page. Instead, she had been reading the same paragraph over and over again while her mind ran amok. She put the book aside and reached over to turn off the lamp. With the room swathed in darkness, she was left alone with her thoughts.

           She knew she was pregnant. Had known for almost a month. There were suspicions when her period was late and then Polly confirmed it for her. Leah was ecstatic to tell Tommy, but couldn’t bring herself to. Not when she noticed the decline in his health and behavior. What would another child do to him? Scare him? Anger him? Cause him more stress? Anxiety?

           He seemed so unstable; there was no way of knowing. And yet, Leah knew that she needed to tell him soon. Before she began to show and he accused her of lying.

           She also needed to go to the doctor. But Polly warned that the second she did, Tommy would know. He knew all the doctors in Birmingham and they all answered to him whether they liked it or not.

           Leah rolled over and wrapped her arms around Tommy, pressing her forehead against his back. “Tommy, I’m pregnant.” She whispered. She wanted to hear the words, test them out on her tongue. Even though she knew he was out cold, panic bubbled inside. What if he suddenly waked and demanded to know what she was talking about?

           She waited for a beat, but Tommy’s breathing didn’t stutter and he didn’t stir.

           “I’m pregnant.”

           Nothing. The whiskey had done its job of knocking him out for at least another few hours.

           Leah lifted her head and pressed a kiss to the bullet wound on his shoulder blade. “I’m pregnant with our child, Tom.” She whispered. Once she said it, she couldn’t stop. “Polly thinks it’s a girl. I want to go to the doctor and hear the heartbeat. Think about it. A sister for Charlie. A beautiful little girl with your eyes. She’ll be here soon. Soon enough.” She swallowed and rested her head back onto the pillow, her arms withdrawing from Tommy’s waist. “I’m pregnant.” She said aloud one more time before pressing a palm to her abdomen.

~~~~~~~~~~~

           Tommy woke up the next morning with an unbearable headache. He could hardly see for a moment and his body groaned with protest as he sat up. The bed beside him was empty and bright sunlight shone through the curtains. So he naturally assumed it was late in the morning and Leah was already up and out.

           “Fuck…” He swung his legs around to press his feet to the floor. The pounding in his head was merciless as he rubbed his eyes. But he was slowly starting to remember a few things about the night before. The gauze on his hand reminded him of the glass cutting his palm. The careful application of the bandage reminding him that Leah was there to take care of him. Her gentle hand escorting him to bed. And he’d dreamed something. Something odd. Leah sitting up in bed beside him, holding a baby girl in her arms.

           Strange.

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