#quite A Lot this weekend in particular lmao

[boba-beom]

*:･ﾟ❅･ﾟskate to my heart | KANG TAEHYUN

pairing: taehyun x fem!reader

genre: oneshot; fluff, bsf2l

summary: after watching taehyun at practice several times, he eventually asked you to watch his last, big game for the season in exchange for a date later the same night. with an uncertified label and known feelings between the both of you, would taehyun end the day with two wins?

wc: 4.1k

warnings: not proofread :< bestfriends 2 lovers, taehyun courting reader, a sprinkle of jealousy, taehyun almost fought someone eep, very little hockey terminology+knowledge (inaccurate representation most likely), physical affection, littlesttt bit suggestive, reader admires taehyun a lot but she gets shy sometimes, lil emotional, minor misunderstangin, taehyun has a super soft spot for reader and ADORES her, confession, a little cheesy, a kiss :>

a/n: requested by anonie! thank you anonie for sending this through <3 I enjoyed writing this and I hope you enjoy reading! also 'courting' is when one person typically spends time and puts in effort with the person they are wanting to pursue! a little better than the talking stage lmao. I would also like to thank @gyupremacy @junniieesbby and @amoryeonjun for helping me come up with title options for this fic, ily guys (I may use one for a short sequel to this but that's for another day lmao)

a few days ago you had promised taehyun that you would come with him to his final hockey game for the season. in exchange, he made a promise to take you out on a date after, regardless if he wins or not.

and that led you to this very moment.

the sports venue was quite big, just the right size for the local games, with the building accommodating two rinks for figure skaters on the other side and ice hockey on the side you're on, in which you're seated by the acrylic panels so you were one of the closest to the rink.

just for taehyun.

he's the sole reason you've bought new outerwear and accessories to keep you warm within the rink, you even bought a jersey jumper with the colours of the team he is in. perhaps you went the extra mile and personalised it with his surname and birth date number.

"I hope you'll come to my hockey game this weekend. it's the last one for the season and it would mean a lot to me if you came along. and then afterwards I'll promise to take you on a date, please?"

his words echoed in your head as if he had told you just before you arrived at the sports venue. a smile had started creeping up on your face as you remembered the way he almost begged you to go on a date with him; his eyes gentle and his hand enveloped yours.

taehyun's team, rockets, had plenty of fans. some being seated a few rows behind you on your far left. it wasn't hard to miss them from the way you could hear high pitched squeals as soon as the players for rockets stepped their hockey skates onto the ice, watching the team skate past you one by one.

as each player glided past you, the cheers for the team were non-stop, whistles, screams and chants behind you. yet you managed to block them out a little — as if the lack of sounds would help you see better — and your eyes were darting around to look out for one player in particular.

then the crowd started to cheer significantly louder than before. that's when your eyes locked with a pair of large, round ones that had a familiar hold on yours. he sent you a subtle wave paired with a quick wink, and you thank god that you were sat at the front to catch that.

you waved your blue and red striped scarf, that you had bought just for him, as you called out for him and his team name as an attempt to hide the fact you could feel your cheeks heating up.

but taehyun noticed. you couldn't hide that from him.

the game wasn't going to start for another thirty minutes since the players were gliding around for their on-ice warm ups. you observed the way players would get comfortable on the ice, taking in long strides, others in smaller groups to do their crossover drills from one end of the rink to the other.

you noticed some of the crowd coming closer around you, to the acrylic panels since they were able to stand there within the duration of practice up until the puck drop. luckily you remained in your seat and was still able to have some space around you.

a call of your name caught your attention, but you knew it wasn't taehyun's voice from the sounds of it. a player from the opposing team, wearing the black and white kit, had slowed down skating in front of you, and attempted to spark your attention but you remained neutral and kept a tight lipped smile.

"yah! penguin. shouldn't you be on the other side of the rink?" your ears focus on taehyun's voice, muffling the sounds around you.

knowing taehyun, he was just being protective over you but you still had to make sure he didn't get into any fights. the game hadn't even started yet. he made his way past the opposing player, gliding past him as he slowed down right against the acrylic and knocked on it.

you okay? he mouthed at you with a little nod of assurance.

you gave him a soft smile with two thumbs up to give back the reassurance, but taehyun still felt compelled to stay a few seconds longer. he gave you a knowing look with a head tilt and brows raised slightly, but you couldn't help but laugh a little at his determination to make sure you were okay. again, you noded and smiled as you moved your wrists flicking outwards in a 'shoo' motion so he could get back into warming up with no distractions.

it was amusing that that was the first time taehyun behaved assertively in front of another player outside of the game. he usually had good sportsmanship with all players, however, this time around it seemed as thought he was more bothered than you were.

watching taehyun was nothing out of the norm for you since you always offered to come with him during his practices, admiring the way his skin glowed and reflected the light from the ice below him. watching the way he moved from one side of the rink to the other with steady and swift movements while in control of passing the puck was something you were always amazed about.

there had been a few cases when taehyun was free on the ice, face turning to look straight at you since he always knew where you would sit, and once he had your attention he'd quickly wave at you. you knew if you were on the ice yourself you would melt right through.

*:･ﾟ❅･ﾟ

after a good twenty minutes of the game, the first intermission had started. the teams made their way to their designated sides off the rink, rehydrating and even getting something to nibble on within the fifteen minutes they had.

some players came back onto the rink five minutes before the game resumed, skating to their assigned places. meanwhile you kept your eyes out for your best friend, but the same player from the opposing team made a return towards you.

you noticed but you paid him no attention, keeping that same tight lipped smile while your eyes were darting everywhere but in front of you.

he knocked on the clear barrier, and mouthed 'can I get your number?' and gestured his hand to a phone sign in which you slowly shook your head and mouthed a 'sorry'. he didn't seem to take it and asked again, begging at this point. you were about to shake your head again until a player in blue and red skimmed behind him and backed him up against the clear panel.

you stood up to get a better look and it was no other than taehyun. he was about to grab the other player by the collar of their kit until you had your hand flat on the surface and banging it against the acrylic three times to grasp his attention. taehyun's fist didn't reach the collar, thankfully, catching the worry in your eyes and he retracted his unravelling fist.

a sigh left you as you saw him back up from his opponent, your head shaking slowly at him while you mouth 'it's okay'. he was lucky he hadn't gone ahead with it otherwise it'd led to a five-minute major penalty towards him. he still had two thirds of the game left.

once you sat back down in your seat, you readied yourself for the next twenty minutes of the game. the teams were back in their designated sides of the rink, and taehyun was set in his position as center.

you focused on him, knees slightly bent, hands holding the hockey stick and his concentration on the center before the referee dropped the puck. he hits the puck as soon as it collided with the ice, and his movements remained swift and sharp as he and his teammates led the puck to the other side of the rink.

it was clear seeing the puck passed from taehyun, center, to the left winger then right winger, but so many players blocked your vision. it had you thinking the puck had been taken by the opposing team, though in a fraction of a second your ears were filled with the crowd cheering. from the sounds of it rockets had scored a goal, and you looked up at the screen above the rink to watch a quick replay of who scored the goal.

it was no other than the star player who has your heart.

you stood up, cheering and clapping, waving your scarf as you try and find him in your field of vision. almost as if you were in a movie, the hockey players skated aside and taehyun's skating towards his original position, facing you. you could see his teethy smile as he pointed out at you, hearing a few 'ooh's and whistles from the audience.

the pounding in your chest felt like it was about to burst and the heat crawling up to your cheeks were starting to burn you up. you shook your head at him again, this time sheepishly, as you bit the inside of your cheek, refraining your grin but you couldn't hold out and let out an endearing laugh.

*:･ﾟ❅･ﾟ

it was the second and last intermission of the overall game. the game time period had just finished up nicely, rockets' scores in the lead with nine and the opposing team with five. you had a good feeling about rockets winning the final twenty minutes of the game.

there were about eight minutes left of the intermission before they resumed the game, so you made your way through the row to the restroom.

as you walked down the corridor to find the toilets you felt a loose grasp on your wrist, making your gasp hitch in your throat and turn your head to see just the person you couldn't wait to see until the end of the game.

"tae, what are you doing here?" you whispered at him, the confusion on your face clear as day.

"I was too excited, I wanted to see you."

you noticed the way his slightly damp and dishevelled hair was grazing just by his brows, his face glowing from the sheer layer of sweat. and his eyes steady on yours.

"well," you slid your wrist out of his hold and played with his fingers. "we still have that date later tonight, remember?"

you looked up at him and you see a proud smirk on his lips, nodding his head slowly in attempt to keep in his excitement. but the rose hue on his cheeks were a big giveaway.

"I'll see you later then. I'll do my best for you, keep your eyes on me."

taehyun lifted your hand and lightly pressed his lips against the back of your fingers. the familiar feeling of your heart about to burst in your chest returned, and you caught the way the tips of his ears blushed the same pink tinge you saw earlier.

"do your best, my star player." you smiled at him, and he let out a soft scoff intertwined with his laugh. watching him walk away to get back onto the rink and finally letting you go to the restroom.

walking into the restroom you slammed your hands flat on the countertop beside the sink, looking at your reflection in disbelief.

"my star player?! really?" your expression changed when you repeated it again, smiling at yourself and shaking your head. "I must be out of my mind."

you can't believe how fast your feelings were brewing for your best friend. there's always been this unspoken dynamic between you, indirect words that mean something a little more, looks that only has your heart fluttering in your chest — and his. gestures that tended to linger and only either one of you would notice that it was a second longer than what would be considered 'platonic'.

snapping out of your reverie you went to use the toilet before making your way back to your seat. you had the final twenty minutes left and then the evening to talk to taehyun properly.

*:･ﾟ

there were five minutes left until the game was over, and during this game the opposing team had scored three times, bringing the current score for rockets with nine, still, and the opposing team with eight.

you hoped the game wouldn't end in a tie. it would be a shame to end the final game of the season in a tie. rockets were doing so well throughout the past two game, but this third game seemed to be the opposite of what they call 'the charm'.

"come on, come on. just one more point." you whispered to yourself, chanting nervously. your hands gripped onto your jacket, taking it off and revealing your customised jersey jumper reading 'KANG' with '05' underneath in bold.

as soon as you were sat comfortably, you checked the time once more; just under four minutes until the end of the game.

one last point and you'd be celebrating later in the evening.

you watched the puck passed around by the opposing team, almost accepting defeat until the players started skating towards the other end of the rink. rockets had the puck by their sticks and from all you could see, it was being passed repeatedly between the left winger and left defence. losing sight of it again it seems like the right winger had it until you saw taehyun receiving it.

with an extremely quick knock of his hockey stick against the puck, it flew into the goal for the final time this season and the speakers let out the horn indicating the end of the game. the screen above showed the final scores, rockets - 10 / guests - 8.

just in time, and your star player was surrounded by his teammates, each of them skating up to him and knocking the front of their helmets together. watching him being congratulated by his team was so endearing to watch — especially knowing just how much work he's put into this sport, knowing how much he loves it.

the crowd behind you was still full of cheers, whistles and chanting. but your eyes were fixed on taehyun as he took his helmet off, his hair a little more damp and dishevelled compared to when you saw him during the second intermission. that didn't stop him from looking incredible with his face literally glowing from his sweat and the ice reflecting off of the droplets.

he made a beeline towards you for the last time on the ice, a huge grin adorned on his face along with his asymmetrical dimple making an appearance.

was it because his team won? perhaps. was it because you were wearing the jersey with his name and birth date? most likely.

his smile was too contagious you didn't realise when you started smiling so hard, you were laughing a little too. the continuous cheers had you joining in, clapping towards taehyun, all while he mouthed a 'meet me by the foyer'.

after the crowd started moving, you made your way straight to the foyer, watching the audience walk past you as they exited the venue.

you're leaning against a pillar, watching the last strand of the light in the sky disappear through the floor to ceiling glass panels as your stomach was filled up with butterflies from the thought of going on a date with your best friend and making it a joint celebratory dinner.

a pair of hands abruptly weighed your shoulders down, having your heart leap out of your chest as you turn around to a giggly and cheerful taehyun.

"tyun! you were amazing out there!" you exclaimed, jumping up to hug him with your arms over his shoulders and his bag sliding down his arm, only hugging you with one arm around your waist.

"yeah well, I had to put on my best. you were watching." you playfully nudged his arm, biting back your grin but his was too contagious to hold back. "no but seriously, the team did so well tonight. they're going out to celebrate, actually."

your smile faltered in the littlest bit, thinking carefully before you asked him.

"do you want to go too? we can always rain check the date... if you want? I don't mind, seriously." you felt the guilt appear inside you, not wanting to hold him back. you saw how happy he was out there and it wasn't all the time you saw taehyun like that.

"hey, no." taehyun shrugged his bag strap to hang from his shoulder, and wrapped an arm around your shoulder, slowly walking out the exit together to toward the car park. "I have a date to go to and I wouldn't want to miss that for the world. I see those blokes almost every week anyway, I'll live."

taehyuns words brought the flutter back in your chest and you raised your hand to hold onto his that's hanging over your shoulder. the evening air was cool and taehyun's freshly washed hair was finally out of his face. from the angle you could see, he was literally the definition of perfection in your books.

letting his words process in your head, all you managed to say was, "ah, you're so cheesy." you let go of his hand to open the car door, sitting inside as you waited for him to put his stuff in the trunk and sit in the driver's seat.

"yeah, but you like it though." his voice had a playful tone, probably with a smile on his face, it was dark in the car. he wasn't even looking at you, buckling his seatbelt and inserting the key to start the car.

yeah. I do.

*:･ﾟ❅･ﾟ

it's almost been an hour since taehyun dropped you home to get ready and he did the same. you texted him saying that you were done and just waiting for him to pick you up, which didn't take too long because he fortunately didn't live too far away from you.

your phone's notification sound went off as he sent you a simple I'm outside text, but that was the norm with him. you grabbed your purse and shrugged on your coat over your dress, examining your final look through the body-length mirror in the hallway before unlocking the door.

a taehyun in a black button down, top button left undone and sleeves folded to a three quarters length up his forearm that matched nicely with his dark slacks was standing in front of you. and how could you look past the bouquet of red roses arranged with baby's breath, elegantly wrapped in decorative cellophane.

"for my beautiful date."

your lips formed a subtle pout as you retrieved the flowers from him, noticing the sheer bow wrapped around the stems.

"taehyun," your voice was meek, just audible enough until you cleared your throat. "these are stunning, thank you, handsome."

you walked back into the hallway to place them in an empty vase in which you emptied out a couple of days ago after you'd turned the old arrangement into dried flowers.

returning to the entrance, you released a heavy sigh while walking through the door, controlling yourself to not gawk at the gorgeous man stood on your porch.

"why?" taehyun stepped aside for you to shut and lock the door.

you could feel him hovering behind you, and you noticed his shadow casted over your shoulder and could be seen against the wooden door.

"because..." your voice trailed.

once you were done checking you had locked the door properly, you turned around, paying no attention that you were incredibly close to taehyun's face, his eyes darting to your lips before looking back up at your eyes. you lost your balance as your back almost crashed into the door if it wasn't for his hand resting on your lower back.

"because?" he parroted.

your chest was slightly heaving, knowing that he could potentially hear your heart drumming in your chest for the nth time that evening.

"um, because... we're gonna be late for our reservation." you hastily slid aside and walked towards his car as he trailed behind you, his hands in his pockets and letting out an amused scoff with an endeared smile on his face.

*:･ﾟ

to your relief, you had arrived just in time for your private reservation and you had nothing to worry about. the restaurant was beautiful — it was elegant. the high ceiling with dark grey marble pillars in each corner of the room to withhold the structure. a contrast from the ligher shade of grey for the tiled flooring.

"how long until the next season?" you asked taehyun, curious as you fiddled with the corner of the napkin on the table.

despite being with taehyun almost on a daily basis, this was something you weren't used to. the atmosphere was a little different, a little thicker and laced with something that hasn't been spoken about, but it's there.

you were nervous. you knew that, taehyun knew that and he could definitely see that. he reached his hand over to scoop up your fingers gently into his, and the motion of his thumb skimming over your knuckles somewhat helped with those nerves.

"this season only finished a few hours ago, ___." the continuous movement of his calloused fingers against yours had calmed you down enough, but you couldn't manage to look him in the eye until he tugged on your hand lightly. "but probably not for another couple of months or so, we'll see."

you both held eye contact, the longest you managed ever since he picked you up from your house. he opened his mouth to say something but you had already beat him to it, starting to speak before you realised.

"I meant it when I said this, but you genuinely looked so happy out there on the rink." he listened and nodded as he let you continue. "just seeing you so passionate about what you love on the ice rink at first hand was amazing, honestly." you let out a half hearted chuckle.

"well, part of it's because you're there to support me. throughout my practices, trainings and today's game." it was your turn to caress the inside of his palm, letting him know that you'd always be there for him. "and I have something to say."

you nod, listening intently.

"if it wasn't for you supporting me throughout, I don't know if I would've even continued up until now. I got this far because of you. and I know you can sense... whatever this attraction is between us too. you're my best friend and always will be," he paused, noticing the way you bit the inside of your cheek. "but I also want to be your lover."

taehyun didn't know if it was the reflection from the hanging lights above you, but he swore your eyes lit up. you didn't know if you were going to cry because you almost thought you were getting friendzoned, or it was because taehyun had cleared the air and asked to be your lover.

worry washes over taehyun's face, setting aside his utensils as he picked up his napkin to lightly dab on the stray tear that fell without your knowledge. he cooed at you, and you weakly laughed at yourself.

"I was afraid you were going to friendzone me for a second." you had taehyun lightly scoff and slowly shook his head at you, but his gaze softened, brows relaxed and eyes twinkling. "I'd love you to be my lover, tyun. and I'll love you twice as much."

your tears brimmed at your eyes, threatening to fall one after the other until taehyun decided to get out of his chair and walk over to you, a knee on the ground while he cupped your cheek and cooed you with sweet, reassuring words.

"I'd be a fool if I friendzoned you," he dabbed away the tears towards the outer corner of your eyes, "you okay?"

you nodded your head in certainty, cupping his cheek and you noticed the way his eyes are so focused on you, holding the galaxy within. the eyes of your best friend filled with nothing but love and adoration for you.

"tyun?" he hums at you whispering his name. "can I kiss you?"

he huffed an exhale paired with a hopeful nod, and his eyes are focused on your lips.

"please do."

you both let out relieved sighs once your lips collided. his hand gently slid from your cheek to the back of your neck as he deepened the kiss, melting into one another's touch. his moan got caught in the back of his throat the moment he felt your teeth gingerly tugging on his bottom lip before parting the kiss.

"you're just full of surprises, aren't you?" he chuckled at your expression once you realised what you did.

"well, there's a first for everything, isn't there?" your tone smug with a hint of confidence, taehyun attempted to keep a stoic expression.

"that's so cheesy." he stood up, stroking the top of your head and tucking a few loose strands behind your ear.

"but you liked it though." you replied, and he returned to his seat, facing you with a defeated but pleased look on his face.

"yeah, I do"

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[mod2amaryllis]

I'm waiting for this migraine to die so I'm gonna tell you guys about Marshall, the dog who made me quit. read on if you wanna learn about extended quarantine and why this job sucks sometimes and other times is the most rewarding thing on the planet, often for the same reasons lmao.

in 2021, the weight of covid was kinda crashing down. i heard this was the case for a lot of health workers. we switched into emergency mode throughout 2020 and powered through, then the rest of the world decided to try and "get back to normal" a year later, giving no regard to the people who'd been working like a speeding train with the brakes off all that time. i was losing it!!! add a few more hay bales to my back when we hired a new doc who was the most demanding dude I'd ever met (still is, but we've come to some understanding lol) and who decided to run me as ragged as possible the first day he was left to his own devices.

that was the day Marshall came in.

i didn't talk about this back then because the outcome of the case was uncertain and the details so specific, but here's the run down knowing that 2 years later, Marshall is living his best life. when he was a baby, too young to have received a rabies vaccine, his owners found a rabies positive bat in the house. the state vet will always recommend euthanasia in these situations, OR, if you can somehow find and afford the option, a 6 month quarantine. this was such a tragic situation the owners were willing to try to save him. my clinic happens to have a decent isolation ward that's rarely in use; we use it for infectious patients like parvo puppies, uri's that have to be hospitalized, etc. so my boss agreed to take him for those 6 months. but the owners' caveat was that if he wasn't mentally adjusting to isolation after a couple weeks, they would euthanize so as not to put him through it and leave him with lifelong behavior issues.

that day, when animal control brought Marshall in the middle of an insane rush, we were short staffed and already at the end of our ropes with this new doc. i was the only qualified person who could talk to the officer. i was the only person who could take him back to isolation. the act of putting a 12 week old puppy in a 4 x 4 run where i knew he would either spend 6 months untouched, or never see the outside again, broke me. last straw.

i was a mess, for the rest of that day and the rest of that weekend having to go in and take care of him, when it was too early for him to adjust so i was sure he wouldn't make it. I'd come home sobbing. eventually jose was just like, "this isn't worth it any more," and i sent in a two weeks notice. i'd come close to doing so many times in the previous 6 years but never pulled the trigger. it took a total meltdown. my managers responded with regret, but understanding.

i wish i could've just felt free and done with it but for those two weeks i was just uncertain. this job is so complicated. the benefits for my pets are enormous; it's my main social network; it's income; I'm good at it and it gives me purpose. it's just also hell on earth! with no pressure from anyone else one way or the other, by the end of two weeks I'd decided to instead try going part time. that's where I'm at 2 years later so guess it worked lol.

but! there was still Marshall. shortly after we took him, we also happened to get a call for the same situation on 2 cats, and decided to take them as well. 3 animals on a 6 month quarantine. very new and daunting for all of us.

that first weekend was hard, but slowly, Marshall figured things out. it was the least ideal situation imaginable and i was at rock bottom and so was he, but i had this moment of like.....ok. if he wants to make this work, I'm gonna do as right by him as possible. and of course all us techs were helping him (one of my road dog coworkers always opened so i referred to her as his "morning mom") but i in particular took a special interest in training and enrichment. it became a passion. i was working less, but i volunteered extra weekends so i could see him more.

he was so young he hadn't even done much basic command training, and the fact that i couldn't touch him at all was a challenge. i started with a clicker to signal I'd rolled a treat into his run, since i couldn't give it to him directly. over those months we went through the basics: sit, down, paw, touch, using a back scratcher for a hand. part of the worry was him getting enough exercise; we noticed that when he'd get agitated, he'd jump on the bars non stop. i was like hmm that might be our only option, so i made "up" a command. i'd basically run burpies for exercise, up-sit-down-sit-up. he was a fast learner, very attentive. seeing him keep his wits about him like that was straight up thrilling. he even "potty trained" himself, barking like crazy whenever he'd go to the bathroom so we'd know right away he needed the run cleaned.

in the ward, there are 2 runs and 3 kennels. i trained Marshall to go back and forth between runs so we could clean. we'd have his food waiting for him in the next run over so he could eat while we'd clean; at the midday switch, he'd have a doggie popsicle. he was such a smart dog i knew toys and treats alone weren't cutting it for enrichment, and i couldn't constantly train him when i still had to be doing the rest of my job.

i started having everyone save every single box and paper-packaging that came in. i'd unfold some boxes for "bedding," so he'd at least have something between him and the concrete (he'd chew and eat any blanket we tried giving him). the rest, i turned into puzzles. i put treats inside and closed them up. put big boxes on their side in his run so he could go in and out. crumpled up paper-packaging with treats mixed in for him to dig through. every day i'd turn one run into a box-toy paradise, let him in, clean the other, and by the time i was checking back in on him he was snoozing in a pile of destruction. success. when other techs wouldn't go to the same lengths, i'd stay late pre-making his boxes and telling people to just throw them in dammit. i also queued several ambient sound playlists, birdsong cityscapes etc, to play on the weekend days when he was alone for long periods.

the months went by like this. i learned more about training, enrichment, and most specifically quarantine than i ever had outside of my experiences with my own puppies. we fell into a routine. we straight up loved each other, he was part of my life. he'd been this horrible trigger and pretty much doubled my workload, but he got to live.

then there were the cats! they were a little easier than Marsh just because they were already adults so didn't have all this energy to wrangle. for them, daily cleaning of course, taking turns going into the 1 empty kennel where i'd have treats, catnip, and other "new" smells waiting for them. for enrichment i focused on reconfiguration. every 2-3 days i'd rearrange things in their kennels, with the big pieces being a litter box, a bed, and an upright sturdy box (so they could either be in it or on top of it, giving them one upper level). it was habitat tetris. we'd play with strings and use the back scratcher for pets. then about every week, i'd switch their kennels to slightly change their view AND traded beds to mingle scents. they were from the same household and we were worried there'd be difficulty re-bonding after not being in direct contact for so long. they also did very well by the end of 6 months aside from gaining a lot of weight (oops). i learned just as much from them, and would love to help anyone else who might struggle with needing to quarantine pets.

i've seen people posting for help about similar situations and just wanna scream from the rooftops: the beginning is very daunting and hopeless, but animals aren't like us!!!!!! they do the best with what they got!!!!! if you work hard and keep them clean and develop a routine it'll all work out!!!!! Marshall walked out of there at 6 months a normal happy puppy in desperate need of a haircut.

it's interesting because i've never interacted much with his owners. i don't think they know i'm the one who kept him from losing his mind in there, even though everyone else at the clinic does, and i'm weirdly ok with that. the other day he came in cuz the dummy ate a bunch of meds he wasn't supposed to; the doc brought him to the back and instantly, Marshall rushed right for me. he still remembers me in a good way. there's still love. it's like...one of the few patient relationships i've had that feels truly deeply personal. in retrospect i think he had a bigger hand in healing my relationship with this career and animals in general than i realized at the time.

so thanks for making me quit Marshall. i feel a lot better now.

(i don't have any pics of him from that time (tragic ssd card accident) but he was an overgrown doodle puppy so he looked like this.)

[angiiepaniic]

hiii giving you an excuse to talk about your bill because i also like him a lot and know your pain about never being able to talk about him. so heres your divine excuse to ^-^ i wanna hear

AAAA YOU DONT KNOW WHAT YOU’VE DONE this will be VERY LONG and VERY RAMBLY so like u asked for this (thank u btw ur my first ask)

man idek where to like start :,D

(should note that this is mainly a modern rendition but sometimes i picture us in his world too so it goes either way, really :3)

if you want me to elaborate on anything then just lmk! (that goes for anyone who wants to)

OH OH ok so i’ve been REALLY getting into the band sleep token and there’s like 4 songs that remind me of him and as a result CANNOT stop listening to them (namely rain, give, mine, and telomeres - i highly recommend them!)

bill will listen to just about anything music wise but has a particular soft spot for things like blues, country, and some older rock like billy joel (also really likes soul and r&b like h.e.r. and muni long but will never admit it) — but generally, in his eyes, if it’s a good song it’s a good song, regardless of genre or artist.

he’s even more open with food, like, he will eat anything in front of him even if he doesn’t like it - just how he was raised. he doesn’t have any set favourites besides some southern classics (he will eat 25 servings of mac n cheese in one sitting if u let him)

i on the other hand am VERY iffy with food and find it hard to eat a lot of things, but we know each other so well now that bill will just eat off my plate sometimes (with consent ofc)

he’s not the best cook but is an absolute GRILL MASTER. all gang cookouts are held at his place (and pearson can’t decide if that’s insulting or not)

we spend like 90% of our time just relaxing together, but he does boxing on the weekends to (and i quote) ‘’stay strong for his lady’’

very protective, ABSOLUTELY the jealous type - not in a toxic way, just a bit grumpy sometimes (as always, this is bill we’re talking about)

he’s SO pleasant to be around. we have the same awful humour, the same love languages (we’re both so touch starved that we cling to each other like a curse)

he can be a bit a of a bastard with all the playful teasing but i do the same so it’s an even battleground. i can call him stupid and it’s fine, anyone else does and im THROWING HANDS (and so will he, probably) — and in turn, he’s the only one who can call ME stupid or HE will throw hands while i cry in the corner LMAO

the modern stuff doesn’t have very specific lore, just some cross-dimensional shenanigans. most of it is just based around my actual day-to-day and how i think we’d be living together — but i have a bunch of little aus! got a goth one, got a biker one (one of my personal faves), got a gender bend one because i’ll be damned if bill can’t ALSO be my girlfriend

when i imagine us in the red dead universe i refuse to let him have the bad ending he gets canonically - my funky little brain says that everyone’s healthy and happy in a little ranch or settlement somewhere because that’s what EVERYONE deserves (except micah)

i know most people view him as gay, but i personally headcanon him as pansexual and into everyone regardless of gender because I feel like that fits him quite well

he really is quite loveable, just sometimes he has trouble showing it - but he’s getting better. his ‘i love you’s come out as random hugs, random compliments, and endearing nicknames (as embarrassing as it is i imagine his go-to is calling me bunny :3)

we’re both kinda insecure so sometimes we have a back-and-forth but it’s compliments. i’ve been telling him every day that he’s wonderful and amazing and the best and that his belly’s one of my favourite things and i will DIE on that hill idc how much he complains.

ik that if he was reading the above paragraph he’d look at me and go ‘’BUT YOU COMPLAIN LIKE THAT TOO’’ and yk what he’s right - but that’s why we have each other

our relationship is very healing for the both of us. we both get the love we need and deserve after being deprived of it for so long, and genuinely we’re happier for it. i got out of a lot really bad habits thanks to him, and i’ve been doing my best to help him too <3

[viarayy01-blog]

heres some au stuff while i work on a longer story. mainly just for me so ik who everyone is but thought it would be good to post as well.

goldenrock au stuff below the cut bc its a tad long.

Characters:

THESE ARE NOT THE PERSONALITY TRAITS, JUST THE ROLE IN THE STORY

Cassie: Cassidy’s counterpart

Gregory: CC’s counterpart

Cassidy: Cassie's Counterpart

Evan: Gregory’s counterpart

Vanessa: Mikes counter but also Williams?

Mike: Ness’s counter but also Gregory's?

William: Still a serial killer but matches/mirrors Vanny from SB. so also a ness counterpart

Everyone else is the same mostly, don't really change the roles besides the fact that instead of CC (Greg in og) getting possessed by my mimic/glitch trap, it's mike (for GGYthing. Name would be MCL.) And William is still evil. He just follows a similar role to Vanny in sb but isn't a reluctant follower. He welcomes vanni as a parasite. He also is still partners with henry (business) but now they just own fredbears megaplex. Henry is basically the same. Charlie and Mike are close in age and Sammy is here too. And Jeremey. Bc gays. everyones a bit older here so like 16-17. They all work (illegitimately) at the plex as security guards on weekends and afterschool. Cheaper to pay and it keeps them out of trouble (looking at mike specifically). Vanessa is a corpse bc uhh… michael counterpart. She still works at the company as a repairman, but is not seen till later. all 5 missing kids (susie, gabriel, ect) are here as well, and they do indeed end up missing (more on that later)

Now animatronics. 

Goes up to the toys bc i like them best. So the mini music men are the main toys, with mangle as the actual music man. There's only 3 mini’s obviously lmao. Toy Freddy, Toy Bonnie, Toy Chica. But they are very fast and perform with mangle in the arcade. Puppet is a map bot but also sun and moon?. she floats from the celling like moon does with his cord but thats where the similarities end. She gives guests glowing green wristbands that serve as the fazwatch in this universe. its for parents to keep track of their kid, using an app?? But here it is used to track kids to isolate them from each other, and make them go “missing”. Like circus baby if ykwim. Speaking of which, circus baby. I like her. So she's here as well. Remember peepaw afton. Yeah well that's circus baby now. Used to get vanni (parasite little bitch) what she needs to survive, a body of her own. 

And uh funny story. Elizabeth finds out that her dad is possessed by a parasite from the 80’s and her brother is controlled by something similar, so William takes action ig. But wait. I'm not letting her go just yet. Afterall, Evan and Cassidy need a buddy to travel with as well, right? Their 2 extra friends aren't quite enough… So more on that later for spoiler reasons. also no mimic bc i dont even want to delve into that can of worms... closest u get is circus baby. be happy its JUST circus baby lmao

Ok main animatronics. Roxy, Glam Freddy, Spring Bonnie, and Golden Freddy. All the glamrocks are present in the 1980's original diner, but Ness got a bit angry and uhhh... oops Vanni made her kill people haha. so they are. gone. for now. Roxy and Freddy are completely robotic and have no sentience. Not in the traditional sense anyway. But… Spring Bonnie and Golden Freddy are. Got all that fun AI jazz. They don't match up with any of the glamrocks in particular? Just kind of their own character. So obviously spring bonnie gets the glitch thing from MCL William and is trying to kill Cassidy and Evan. Same with mangle and the toys. But GoldF is like glamrock freddy, AS A ROLE. completely diff personality. So he helps the kids. And that's when stuff really goes down.

Yeah. just explanation stuff hehe. left out greg, ness and cassie bc ive already talked about them a lot.

[kaydenverse]

kinds of music call of duty character listen to but it's based off of my music taste

genre: fluff!

word count: just under 900

content warnings: none i think? just my very wild music taste projected onto my boys

a/n: i got bored and way too invested in making this to not post it so enjoy! i used my music taste as well as a little bit of my boyfriends for a little more range. also so sorry i keep just disappearing college is kicking my fucking ass.

kyle “gaz” garrick

he always has a pair of headphones on him when he can, has a mini speaker he frequently uses in his office on base, definitely listens to music the most out of the group, can't sing but he’ll sing anyways, often jams out with soap and share new songs with each other, listens to a bit of everything but tends to listen to rap, r&b, and indie (also a little bit of bedroom pop he’s got a lot of favorites okay) the most, he can do several tiktok dances pretty well but he gets embarrassed doing them in front of others, he’s very me coded

favorite artists (in no particular order):

flo millie

bruno mars

sza

the weekend

lil uzi vert

the notorious b.i.g.

some songs on his playlists:

pay day - flo milli ft rico nasty

hypnotize - the notorious b.i.g.

low - sza (he thinks this song is so underrated and so do i)

after last night - silk sonic

redbone - childish gambino

everlong - foo fighters

john "soap" mctavish

a close second on who listens to music the most, listens most when he works out and likes to have background noise while he does just about anything, loves movie soundtracks, god awful singer and proud, him and gaz singing together is torture in the funniest way possible, very wide music range but nu metal and rock are his top categories, soap loves when the whole team sits decides to sit in a conference room and wordlessly work on their paperwork together while music fills the silence between them

favorite artists (in no particular order):

beyoncé 

deftones

slipknot 

coraline soundtrack 

the smashing pumpkins 

poppy (hear him and me out okay)

some songs on his playlists:

bloodmoney - poppy

me, myself, and i - beyoncé 

bullet with butterfly wings - the smashing pumpkins 

cha cha - freddie dredd 

other father song - they might be giants (yes the coraline song. it’s good okay.)

clay - the garden

simon "ghost" riley

does like music quite a bit but doesn’t listen as often as gaz or soap, sometimes silence is overwhelming for him so he uses it as background noise to stay relaxed, won’t sing (he can just barely sing well like not a bad singer but he’s not getting a record deal even if he tried), has no particular favorite genre but has a decent range, he describes his music taste kinda weird but in a good way (just like me fr)

favorite artists (in no particular order):

insane clown posse 

michael jackson

pierce the veil (they’re a guilty pleasure of his)

amy winehouse (i once made a cod characters as tweets on tiktok and ghosts tweet was “amy winehouse was right, what kind of fuckery is this” and now i just hc he listens to amy)

nirvana 

type o’negative 

some songs on his playlist:

hold on till may - pierce the veil 

chicago - michael jackson 

you know i’m no good - amy winehouse 

southern nights - glen campbell (so good for what)

21 guns - green day

sugar we’re going down - fall out boy

captain john price

doesn’t often go out of his way to listen to music but still listens enough that he has favorites and keeps playlists, HAS to have his own music playing in the car if he’s driving though (which he usually is and this is a well known rule), quite the singer if he actually tries tbh but he doesn’t often try lmao, primarily like’s songs from ‘his time’ as he calls it (john you are 37 not 60), he doesn’t really have a favorite genre but will say rock if asked (doesn’t like pop much tho) 

favorite artists (in no particular order):

queen 

fleetwood mac

metallica 

black sabbath 

aerosmith (play dream on when he’s drunk and he’ll give you a full performance)

prince

some songs on his playlists: 

chain - fleetwood mac 

war pigs - black sabbath

let’s go crazy - prince

cherry bomb - the runaways

rooster - alice in chains

even flow - pearl jam

rodolfo "rudy" parra

 listens mostly when he does chores or to calm himself when he’s anxious (which is sometimes just before missions), he’s always open to new music suggestions, his singing voice is absolutely beautiful and he’ll sing and hum along as he does chores, guilty pleasure is bedroom pop and indie 

favorite artists: 

laufey

the marías  

whitney houston (he misses her so much cause me too) 

tame impala

pink panthers (because i said so)

tv girl 

some songs on his playlist: 

slow down - laufey

little by little - the marías

the blonde - tv girl

show me how - men i trust 

take a picture - filter

heart to heart - mac demarco

alejandro vargas

when he listens to music he listens to it LOUDLY, loves to have music playing at home while he cooks, he’s not sure if he’s going deaf because his profession requires him to constantly be around guns or because of how loud he listens to his music in his headphones, karaoke enjoyer, decent singer if he tries (price is a little better than him, just by a little), he’s an “anything but country” kinda guy 

favorite artists:

bad bunny

doja cat (i’m not elaborating)

kali uchis

rihanna (he can’t resist)

arctic monkeys

elton john 

songs in his playlist:

i’m still standing - elton john 

shut up and drive - rihanna 

tití me preguntó - bad bunny

bills, bills, bills - destiny’s child 

promiscuous - nelly furtado ft timbaland (yes he knows all of timbalands parts) 

poison - bell biv devoe

[vanmarkus]

Weekend Wip Game ✨

I was tagged by the lovely @daffi-990 thank you mwuah 😘

Rules: List your WIPs below (if you only write one fic at a time, feel free to include future WIPs/ideas!) then answer the following questions. Then, tag as many people as you have WIPs (or more)

(I cut it off halfway cuz I went long like always...)

1. WIP List:

so as you know my wip list is pretty long, but the active ones right now are:

• the mudslide fic

• the jealous eddie fic

• the breeding kink fic

• the accident fic

• the donation smut

2. Which of your WIPs is currently the longest?

the mudslide fic is currently standing at 38.6k and I expect at the very least 20k more... which wouldn't just make it my longest current wip, but also the longest fic I've ever written

3. Which WIP do you expect will end up the longest?

the mudslide fic hands down, unless something drastic happens and one of my wips gets away from me (though from the inactive wips I expect two of them to be around the same length, possibly)

4. Which WIP is your favourite to write/the most enjoyable to write? Why?

I enjoy all of them, but the mudslide fic is surprisingly joyous to write, even though it's mostly just me putting the boys through the emotional and physical wringer lmao

5. Which WIP do you find the most intimidating to write? Why?

listen. I love writing the mudslide fic, but I kinda wrote myself into a hole with it, in the sense that I included a couple of real life locations (though only vaguely) that I just had to make shit up for, which is fine cuz the show does the same, but... idk it's long and the boys spend quite a large chunk of the story separate and it makes me worry that people will find it boring or just idk will be nitpicky about it... like, I have confidence in my writing, but I'm also forever insecure about it??? ugh

6. Which WIP do you experience the most self-doubt about. Why?

uhhh I guess the accident fic?? because it's short and it's kind of written in the way I usually write ficlets, which means I don't spiral about the details that much and now I'm worried that it's gonna seem rushed or way too out of sorts 😓

7. Which of your WIPs will you seek out a beta/sensitivity reader for? Why?

none of them, I'm very much a fuck it we ball type of writer

8. Have any of your WIPs been struck by the curse of writer’s block?

yeppppp. that's why I have so many active wips atm cuz I got stuck on both of my main ones 🥲

9. Which WIP has your favourite OC? Tell us about them?

the mudslide fic – and she's barely even in it, but she grew on me anyway 💛

10. Which WIP is the sexiest?

I have to say the donation smut... or the breeding kink fic, whichever floats your boat I guess

11. Which WIP is the angstiest?

the mudslide fic, definitely

12. Which WIP has the best characterisation (in your humble opinion)?

I'm not sure??? like, I try my best in all of them, but I can't necessarily say if I succeeded idk

13. Which WIP has the best scene setting (in your humble opinion)?

again, I'm probably gonna have to go with the mudslide fic

14. Which WIP have you worked the hardest on?

👆 I've been doing quite a lot of research going into legal procedures, sixth grade curriculum and body decomposition in water, just to name a few (and most of these barely feature btw 🥲), not to mention looking at the map of LA constantly to gauge distances, but it's still kinda fun though

15. Which WIP do you have the highest expectations for? Why?

uhmmm I don't have high expectations for any of them, if we're talking about like, comments and kudos and stuff... usually the fics I just write in a moment of inspiration and just throw online get more attention than the ones I try to finetune for hours/days/weeks, so you know... I try to write fics for myself and hope that there are people they resonate with 🫶

16. Do you dream about any of your WIPs?

listen, I have really hectic and weird dreams, but I don't think I ever dreamed about any of my wips

17. Do any of your WIPs have particular complexities that your other fics don’t?

well, if nothing else, operating with this many characters is something I'm not exactly used to, so the mudslide fic and the jealous eddie fic are kinda unique in that regard, I suppose

18. Which WIP is the funniest or has the most humour?

I'm not... exactly big on writing goofy stuff, which is unfortunate because I love reading it, but I mean it a 100% when I say angst and smut is my bread and butter

19. Do any of your WIPs contain outside POVs or a deep dive on a character other than the main ship? How are you finding that process?

not a very deep dive, but I do touch on a side character's background in the mudslide fic, no outside povs though

20. Tell us one thing we don’t know about one or more of your WIPs

idk?? uhh it's not an active wip, but all I could think about is that Homesick For Your Skin isn't my first parallel universe fic, but it's the first one I had to work out without magic 🪄

I'm sure most of you have already done this, but here are five no pressure tags anyway:

@forthewolves @jesuisici33 @callaplums @ladydorian05 @disasterbuckdiaz

[berryunho]

hii a longg while back I had sent a long ask about how much I enjoyed the answer and had asked about what other cults/writing/media had inspired you when developing the storyline and its characters. In your response you had recommended a list of books that you enjoy/inspire you and I just wanted to share that I bought two of the books you recommended:) The Secret History by Donna Tartt and The Long Walk by Stephen King. It was so exciting and I thought of you as soon as I saw them at Barnes and Noble lol. It meant so much that you replied and recommended some great books because I really do enjoy your work and reading about how you come up with stuff when you write. This is so silly but I got so excited and wanted to tell you haha. You inspired me to start my book collection!! If you have any more recommendations please feel free to share if you would like🫶 I hope you have a great weekend!

OMG!!!!!!! im literally honored seriously this is so awesome !!! i really hope you enjoy the books and pls lmk what you think after you read them :] im actually touched for real thinking about you thinking about me hehehe <33 putting a read more before more recs !!! hehe

im gonna be so real with you i REMEMBER answering your ask and i remember giving some recs but i have scoured my blog (as well as i can w tumblrs shitty search mechanism) and i cannot find it to save my LIFEEEE so ill give some more recommendations but pls forgive me if i repeat a couple bc i cannot remember ... what i said ... LOLLL

so in no particular order here are some more books !! hehe

a canticle for liebowitz by walter miller jr (this book is from 1959 but its actually so funny and the vibes are immaculate)

the langoliers by stephen king (technically a novella but tell me why i have an urge to write an au like this LMAO)

giovanni's room by james baldwin (not like other books i recommend but very good)

chaos by tom o'neill (if you feel like learning about charles manson and the corruptness of the us government)

people who eat darkness by richard parry (if you feel like learning about a japanese serial rapist)

(this one is controversial but. we're adults.) a mother's reckoning by sue klebold (if you feel like learning about the columbine school shooting from one of the shooters' mothers' perspectives)

i probably recommended this BUT if you find yourself really liking stephen king (or even moderately liking him lol) i would. H I G H L Y highly recommend the dark tower series. it is amazing and incredible and i loved every second i spent reading it.

im gonna be so honest rn. i read the entire acotar series. do i think they're good books. no. but did i enjoy reading them and laughing at sarah j maas's writing style. yes. so [shrug].

and to finish i am currently reading dune (like everyone else) and its quite good along with a clash of kings which is. game of thrones. so. hard to read but fun.

but yeah !!!! thank you so much for thinking of me and taking my recommendations hehe it really means a lot !! like i said pls lmk what you think of the two that you got bc those are truly some of my favorite books ever :] <3

[dulcewrites]

I thinking about modern finding common au ideas. myrah being a struggling artist (with her painting) OR an aspiring broadway singer. Aemond is of course the cynical trust fund kid she meets

The broadway one in particular. they bump into each other, like quite literally. Aemond waste coffee on himself, myrah is talking a mile a minute trying to apologize. He just waves it off bc he’s late, also this girl is… a lot. Fast forward an hour, he’s auditioning singers for his dad’s (viserys is a big broadway producer) new musical, and BOOM the annoying coffee shop girl walks in. He is ready to also write no bc he could not fathom working with her. But then she opens her mouth…. Aemond begrudgingly agrees that she is the best they have seen all day. But there’s a big thing about myrah being green compared to them just getting an establish actress.

OR

Helaena drags Aemond (and aegon. Sorry daeron youre too young) out for his birthday. They go bar hopping and end up in this burlesque club. He’s kind of miserable bc it’s so not his scene and Helaena is making him wear a birthday crown lmao. Hel, without Aemond knowing, slipped the door lady an 100 dollar bill asking for someone to give her brother something special. Out walks Myrah in something cute, sparky (and skimpy of course). She gives him a fun performance. Aemond is blushing the whole time. In the end, Aegon tell Aemond to either ask for her number or he will. He’s a bit embarrassed bc he’s sure creeps have came up to her asking for something. He finds out this is Myrah’s side gig as she puts herself through school and auditions for shows. Im just imagining a dinner scene where Alicent asks myrah what she does for work and her, Aemond, hel, and Aegon all exchange a look

The struggling artist one is Aemond decides to get a painting commissioned of all the targtower kids for Alicent’s birthday. Helaena brings up knowing a girl who did a mural at the university she went to. Myrah walks into their multi million dollar home in paint covered overalls and honestly slightly hungover (her bestie passed the bar the day before sue her 🤷🏽‍♀️). Aemond finds her unprofessional, she finds him uptight. Anyway, fast forward, Alicent loves the portrait. Cries and everything. She asks for the painter’s information so she can thank them. Alicent then asks Myrah if she does private lessons. Myrah wants to say no but Alicent keeps adding zeros to the price she will pay, and a girls got to pay the bills. Myrah sort feels for Alicent, a newly divorced now empty nester as her youngest is doing a semester abroad. Aemond comes over one weekend to find his mother finger painting.. yes finger painting. It goes from there

[taegularities]

hi Rid, this is the mafia anon hehe 🥹 i had a busy weekend, but i’ve finally had time to catch up with CMI and i- 😔 let’s just say i trust the process, every story should have a bit of good ol’ angst, so i am here for it! i understand JK’s pov, but i feel like he’s kinda forcing himself to do what (in his opinion) is right, like, it’s his head, not heart. i’m rooting for them so much 🥺

about what anon said, i personally love your style of writing ❤️ and i feel like it actually says a lot about being a great writer, to have your own style. i’ve always enjoyed long chapters, because - in case you’re not focusing on a particular part of someone’s life, like smut for example - it’s impossible to deliver a wholesome story and for me it’s hard to become invested in the story as well. your scenarios are always so well told, every background, every character description, they make your stories complete ❤️ and about the CMI/royal au votes, i might be not objective because they are both about JK hehe, but! sometimes when i work too long on something, even if it’s something i like, it becomes tiring and i do it just for the sake of finishing it. it’s good to take a break to put your energy into smth different ❤️

and yes, i read hell is empty! JK is another level hot in it 🥵🥵 but now that you’ve mentioned late night devil… 👀 looking forward to it, angry and mean male lead is what i live for 🫠

UUH, i’m so sorry for this long ass message 😅 to end it on a lighter note, i found the perfect visualisation of me being bias wrecked by Jungkook 🥵 enjoy! and have a great week Rid 🫶🏼 https://vm.tiktok.com/ZMY1XFTp7/

MAFIA ANON HI !!! i think i'm gonna go with this name 🥺

ah babe, you're 100% right. he's absolutely forcing himself to do smth that he thinks is right, though it might be even more damaging. he just doesn't realise it. but i still understand where he's coming from.. it's the overthinking :((

and yes, yes, i agree, i do also think every writer has their own writing style. i enjoy oneshots a lot, and there are quite a few that are some of my favourite fics, but i know what you mean – it's easier to feel attached to a character when the story's long. and i overthink my writing a lot, so it means the world to me that you like my writing style and everything that a scenario contains <3 about your vote – yeeeppp, i actually am still so damn excited for cmi7, but so am i for royal jk... and since cmi6 was so emotionally loaded, it'd be definitely a great alternative to work on the e2l. but i'll see !! whatever calls for me louder. thank you for saying that, love 🤍

hehehe late night devil is a very old wip and i've no clue when i'll drop it. but pissed jk really does it for me.. the jaw clench and all ugh. never apologise for long messages btw, my god, i LOVE reading through them so much 😭 what i don't love is hOW MUCH THIS TIKTOK RUINED ME LMAO I'M SERIOUS WHEN I SAY IT LITERALLY MADE ME GASP AND TOOK MY BREATH AWAY. smhhh, mafia, why. but yes, i hope you're having a great week, too 😭🤍

[captainknell]

*random story that does not relate to Napoleon other than a resemblance to this particular depiction of him*

So idk if that's a weird little mustache or just supposed to be shadows on his upper lip, but my husband was teasing me that the real reason I like Napoleon is that he looks like a guy who had a crush on me who happened to have a weird little mustache. If you're bored, feel free to read my silly story. I should be sleeping or doing something useful I suppose but here we are...

Way back in the year 2012, I was 18, about to turn 19 👵 (I feel old now). My mom and I were in Florida for a concert and had met up with some of her internet friends. We went out for dinner at a restaurant on the beach. One friend of hers had a son, about my age. We had met them one other time and I was friends on FB with them so we weren't total strangers or anything. Anyways, the adults were talking after dinner and the boy asked if I would like to go for a walk along the beach. Sure, why not. I thought I was grown now and it sounded exciting to go somewhere without a parent! So we walked quite a ways and sat down to rest. He was getting increasingly weird and I was texting another guy that I was talking to at the time and saying how weird he was being. The boy started teasing me, asking if that was my boyfriend. It was not but I think I told him it was in hopes that he would leave me alone. He sat behind me and wrapped his arms around me and asked if he could kiss me on the cheek. I said no and stood up. I was not worried at all, as he was scrawny and I used to work out back then and I knew he was no match for me, if it came to it. I decided it was time to get back to the restaurant and find our mom's. I started walking back and he came running after me. It was now getting dark and I realized how far away we were. There had been a volleyball court with black lights near where we had started and I could not see it at all. It ends up that we had actually walked several miles! Eventually he tried again, by grabbing onto my hand. So we're walking along, awkwardly holding hands. I break into a run (former track runner) and he can barely keep up. I think he said something that annoyed me, but up ahead I saw some big sand dunes and pits that we had passed earlier. I'm not a beach geologist or anything so idk if they were man made or caused naturally by the waves or whatever but I saw the deepest one and ran for it. At the last minute I flung this poor boy into the hole and kept running. Finally I saw the black lights right as they were turned off for the night! It was almost pitch black at this point but I managed to find the restaurant and our angry mom's waiting in the parking lot. Apparently they had been calling us but we hadn't heard or felt our phones while we were running. We still had to spend the rest of the weekend awkwardly in each other's company. And then the next month, I was randomly in Chicago with my dad and they happened to be there too. It was a hot summer day but it got cold at night and we were riding the El and he offered to "be my blanket" and laid on my legs to keep me warm. My dad and I made it back to my Aunt and Uncle's and that's when I met my future husband lmao. He still teases me about it.

[harri-etvane]

Fanfic Ask Game (super late to the party but hope I can still send something in 👀): 💖👻📥🖊🌈[fic of your choice]🧠💭🍰 and: ✨

💖 What do you like most about your own writing?

I'd like to think that even if what I write is short, it's still impactful? Even if just for one reader. I feel like I'm decent at really getting to the heart of something fairly quickly, in about 1k words haha.

👻 What is one WIP you think you may never pick back up?

I just had to trawl through my google docs bin lmao. There was a WIP that was sort of seasonal / Christmas themed, there was a snowstorm, everyone ended up cosy and warm etc. It ended up in the bin mostly because I kinda got fed up of it and it felt a bit same-y to some of the other stuff I've posted.

📥 What is your fave fic to receive comments/messages on?

Any of them! I do kinda enjoy seeing what people think about Fidelis et Verax tbh.

🖊 Post a snippet from a current WIP.

I did a massive WIP clear-out over the weekend, but-

He knows how cold his hands are, his fingers linked together, his whole weight pressing down until he’s sure something is about to give  - but it is not Volodymyr in the end - the sky instead lets loose her grief, the rain pouring down on them. He knows how cold Vova’s skin is, unearthly white on the cold, grey ground - the smell of autumn somewhere in his nostrils, decaying leaves, damp, sour earth.

He doesn’t know how to stop the beads of sweat on Volodymyr's forehead, at odds with all this, the frozen rain, his quivering, faint breathing. He is slipping through Maksym’s fingers like the rain pooling on the ground - the sudden rush of time fleeing past them both.

🌈 What inspired you to write [insert fic here]?

I can't pick any particular fic, but I get a lot of my inspiration from quotes from interviews, photographs from OOTP etc. Most of what I've written comes from specific things; even if it's just a conversation on here with someone, or a comment might have sparked an idea.

🧠 What’s an idea you have that you can’t quite call a WIP yet?

I keep wanting to write Something about Vovan and his terrifyingly alarming trip where he went and got Borsh on the very edge of Kyiv Oblast at the beginning of the war; but I can't make it work for the life of me, so it's just a Concept as of now.

💭 What is a headcanon you have about your own work?

After chapter one of this fic, Maks always makes sure Vova has a cosy sweatshirt.

🍰 Name one of your fave comfort fics (doesn’t have to be your all time fave).

I don't really talk about my other fandoms, but I love this Endeavour Morse fic.

✨ Choose three adjectives to complement your own writing

Subtle, sweet, gentle.

thanks for asking xx

[apaulagize]

28.

... You might be wondering why you’re here. You may be wondering why the fuck I’m here, as I star to write this in December 2022.

On my Tumblr, no less.

a life update

I’ve been meaning to write up something as a way to reflect on my year and create/update my resolutions for every birthday, but life has been quite eventful. To get you up to speed (both my Tumblr followers and... my irl colleagues?):

Took a gap year from uni and worked at a preschool as an Admin Assistant

Eventually did finish my degree at the local state uni (while still working)

The pandemic lol

Actually moved out of my parents’ house during the pandemic... good shit.

Started playing on a private server on a certain mushroom game

Met a handful of good people, but mostly met a lot of bad apples :)

Found out that my now ex-best friend is an abuser and manipulator

Got my heart broken, got fed up with people on the mushroom game, and entered my Hoe Phase™ with dating apps

Met with... a lot of guys during this time :^)

10/10 would do it again because I ended up meeting my now partner through Bumble

Jumped the gun and moved to Washington state with him and his dog

Confirmed that I am not a dog person

Got a kitten!!!!! 

Worked as a contract worker for a biotech company in the city

Also worked at home as a transcriptionist

Lost another best friend for... honestly, I don’t know what the fuck.

And 1.5 years strong with my partner :)))

─── ─── ─── ─── ─── ─── ─── ─── ─── ─── ─── ─── ───

reflections after turning 28

(holy shit i’m old.)

That being said, I’ve been reflecting a lot since moving out of California, and now that I actually feel like an—gasp!—adult, there’s so much to think about. These past two years, I’ve been developing a set list of resolutions that I’ll continue to hone and refine for (hopefully) the rest of my life; however, first, I wanted to reflect on certain topics that’s you’d commonly see in New Year’s resolutions.

Family

I wholeheartedly agree with the statement that distance makes the heart grow fonder because I think I have a better relationship with my parents, now that I’m two states away from them.

I believe that my relationship with my mom, in particular, is less strained than before. I realize that there’s really nothing I can really do to help her and her issues aside from recommending her to go therapy (which she’ll probably not go to, but one can dream).

I still talk to my cousins (on my mom’s side) pretty regularly, which is nice to have since I’m so far from them.

Friends

Oh, this one’s a doozy.

I have practically zero friends in Washington, but I’m not complaining lmao.

Ever since Chai-gate and me leaving Virus, the amount of friends I’ve made on ML have dwindled LOL. While I miss the camraderie that I had with Virus folks, I think it’s better that I’m not with them any more. I do have a handful of people (from ML in general) who I talk to occasionally. :)

Sometimes I do think of CY, but then I’m reminded that he’s a fucking sociopath, and then I don’t miss my memories with him as much.

I don’t miss KZ as much because I genuinely can’t wrap my head around what happened. I’ll live with the good memories I have of her and move on.

I sorely miss hanging out and talking with AL all the time. I feel like we’re growing apart, and I really don’t want to happen. The past two times I’ve been back to California, we’ve hung out briefly. I wanna plan like a monthly hang out session on Discord where we just watch Netflix or play games together.

Health

So, so much better than previous years, for sure.

Ever since I got diagnosed with nonalcoholic shitty fatty liver disease, I’ve been exercising so much more than ever before. More running than swimming, but I can’t complain because I never wake up early enough to go swimming. :)

I also got over my fear of using the machines and weights, and even use an app to create a workout plan. I now look forward to the weekends where I use the machines/weights after five weekdays of intense HIIT running.

Food is about the same, although I will say I don’t drink as often as I used to (probably because I don’t associate with ML people any more). I try to incorporate more veggies now, whether it be eating a salad or pickled veggies.

Speaking of veggies, we try to do Meatless Monday, or at the very least, be pescetarian for a day. (It’s easier for me because I don’t like eating cooked fish :P)

I also have been limiting only one sweet drink per week, including boba, Dutch Bros, Starbucks, etc.

Alcohol is only once per week as well, but honestly, I haven’t drank any for a couple of months now lol.

Career

Working at the biotech company was really nice! I got to commute to and from the city every weekday and tried the public transportation. I got to meet a bunch of people who were friendly with me, despite me being under contract.

After my contract was over, I ended up working a freelance job as a transcriptionist. I’d like to think of it of me getting paid to listen to interviews and typing what they say. Most of it was really interesting content.

In February 2023, I finally started working full-time and in-person at a speech therapy clinic in a local town within the county. The distance is far, and I kind of feel like I’ve walked into a dumpster fire, I’m excited to work there since my major is closely related to it.

Money

As seen in the previous section, the income was better in the beginning of the year.

Working as a transcriptionist was more like like a lil pocket money, to be honest. Maybe if I did them faster, I’d get more monies. B)

The most important thing for me was trying to not spend and save money as best as possible. Buying the necessities like groceries was of course important, but treating myself was also important to keep in mind.

As mentioned in the health section, my sweet drink spending reduced by a lot since I only allow myself to get it once a week. I also only buy something from my wishlist if I get at least 75% completion on my weekly habit tracker (which, (un)fortunately for me, wasn’t a lot of times).

Independence

It’s been getting so much better, and I’m really proud of myself.

Again, working as a transcriptionist gave me some money so I don’t have to completely depend on my savings or my partner.

I try to do Saturday Errands by myself to get easy stuff out of the way, especially things that I can achieve locally. On the other hand, I don’t enjoy going out to the city without my partner because it can be a little sketchy sometimes.

However, I actually did meet a friend I met from ML in the city! By myself (and, well, my partner’s dog as emotional support)! And driving! Past me would be so proud.

I honestly don’t foresee myself ever having to go to the city without my partner because we like to go out on dates in the city if we are there to run errands, but who knows.

Education

I’m sad to say that I haven’t really read much, both for leisure and for educational purposes. I don’t know how I’m going to fit it in my schedule, but I really want it to happen.

Whether it be having study dates at a cafe with my partner as he brushes up on stuff for his job, or carving out some time to learn at home, I still want to keep learning.

Hobbies

I unfortunately haven’t really done anything fun for myself either.

While I have been consolidating my playlists on Spotify, I’m still not caught up with my K-pop favorites, and I’m... six years behind :^)

For film photography, I still don’t have a working camera. Getting one has always been on my mind, but after meeting up with my film photography professor from uni when I visited Santa Cruz, that sort of ignited a desire to get a new camera ASAP. I also have a bunch of unopened film that I need to start using before they go bad.

It’s crazy to think that I thoroughly enjoy going to the gym now. I don’t know if it’s because my younger cousins are gym fanatics, if it’s because I’m dating someone who also likes going to the gym and encourages me to improve, but I really do enjoy working out, much more than I have in the past, even when I was at my beloved VillaSport back at home. :’)

I’ve also got a Switch in 2022 (or 2021, I don’t really remember)! I mainly play AC:NH, and sometimes I’ll play Pokémon Violet if I have some more time.

Cooking’s something that I’m having more fun with now. I don’t think I did a lot of cooking when I was living in Milpitas, but now that I live with and date someone who really likes to cook, I started cooking a lot more too! Now that we have a stand mixer, I can attempt baking >:)

Finally, I’m starting to get around writing “reviews” for series and movies that I watch. I feel like it’s hard to really enjoy watching things any more just from the sheer amount of D-list films that my dad put up on TV and I’m jaded because of that, but I’m hoping to see some gems.

─── ─── ─── ─── ─── ─── ─── ─── ─── ─── ─── ─── ───

I suppose that’s all from me that I can share. I wanna start doing these every year to reflect and to look back. If you made it this far, thank you so much for reading. I hope to grow better during this new year. :)

[a-iya]

hiii omg sorry things got super hectic towards the end of the work week and then i spent the weekend recouping and now it's literally been almost a week since you wrote this 😭

i'm surprised you weren't a movie person until you got into anime! i've always loved going to the theaters and it sucks how expensive tickets have gotten in recent years... especially with "special types" of showings like anime! even though i live in a place where anime is actually quite popular. it's so funny, i actually got super into anime because i took a chance on watching an anime movie in theaters (demon slayer mugen train back in 2021). i was hanging out with a friend; there was a movie she wanted to watch that i already watched and vice versa, so we decided to watch demon slayer since neither of us had seen it but we'd both heard good things about it (were not anime fans at the time). i ended up getting so emotionally attached to rengoku that i went back and PAID to watch it in theaters another 3 times after. movies are such an experience and they're so fun to go to! i guess it also depends on what genres you enjoy but i would definitely go more often if i had more free time (and it also wasn't so expensive nowadays ugh)

so you and your sister also have an age gap! my sister and i are 5 years apart so i think i understand the struggle, especially if you don't see your sister around that much because you've always been in different phases in your lives. it's great that you discovered interests on your own though. now that i'm thinking about it, i've come to realize that i've only ever developed interests in things that other people have introduced me to first; i don't really go out of my way to find out about new things. character flaw i suppose 😭 thank you i'm actually going to write this down, this could be a topic of interest once i decide to start going to therapy again lmao

you've watched so much anime! not me thinking i've watched a lot when i literally could not hold a candle to your list (i have 22, 1 of which i'm still trying to find the will to keep watching) 🤡 it's so cute that you have your list in a notebook too. you have no idea how many attempts i've made at being a journal/planner girl. try as i may, i'm just not built like that 😔 i'm also a lame anime-only type because i don't have the attention span/patience and i cannot be bothered to read words or manga 🥲 i somehow always run into spoilers online though (and/or look them up myself cause it makes me anxious to not know what happens 💀) so i've given up on trying to be spoiler-free as an anime only lmao

also i know the main point of your anime list was obviously which anime you've watched but i couldn't help but notice on your profile that your birthday is actually before mine! i thought we might've been birthday neighbors kinda (since i was somewhat stalking your blog to see if i really did miss it or if you just didn't make it a whole big thing lol), but it's right after my fav character, cinnamoroll's <3

anyway, now i'm wondering if the anime list site is better than my personal spreadsheet and if i should make a profile of my own. on one hand, it's nice to see everything neatly compiled into different categories and view all your stats and fav characters and VAs in one place. but on the other hand, i'm really strict about what i consider to be "watched" and what i don't, and i care a lot about logging things correctly (e.g. i don't want something to be marked as completed on jun 10, 2024 when i finished it in may of 2022 💀). but i don't really care for rating animes and i also don't like if they separate different parts of one show because of their release type (e.g. the haikyuu is part of the haikyuu show, it's not a separate thing just because it came out as a movie 😭)

yikes okay clearly i am very anal and particular so i will just stop here but back to haikyuu: i am hoping i have the opportunity to sloth this week and binge watch the 4 seasons + movies + other but honestly i'm not sure if i'll be able to before the theaters stop showing the movie ;-; i've been trying to start but my timing up till now hasn't been right. i guess we will see! i'll definitely be in your inbox once i start to get familiar with the show! <3

Hiii ＼(ﾟ∀ﾟ)／

Sooo what do you think about the Haikyuu! Movie without knowing anime? 😀

(I'm sending this ask to discuss our impressions in the comments (and recommend this series a bit haha)

Have a nice day ♡

hiiii!! i didn't realize this was going to become a full-on essay so 💀 apologies in advance for the long-windedness. i don't blame you if you don't feel like reading all the way through lmao (there is a tl;dr at the end if that's the case)

my sister actually got into haikyuu after S1 (pretty much a decade ago at this point 😭) so i've at least known about it and understood the gist of it for a while now. i myself didn't get into anime until a few years ago though! so i've been slowly building up my watch catalog. normally i like funny animes so haikyuu definitely fits the criteria, but due to the fact that 1) it's a sports anime 2) i have very little interest in sports and 3) there would be a LOT of episodes to catch up on, it's just been sitting in my to-watch list for years lmaooo

as i started to follow more people on tumblr, i also started to see more haikyuu content, so i recognized some characters just by their appearance (hinata [obviously], but also kenma, kageyama, and atsumu miya [the guy with the undercut, who i don't remember seeing in the movie]). but anyway, my sister had been saying she wanted to watch the movie once it came out. and over the weekend, i happened to see a lot of people posting about going to watch the movie so i told her we should go! and so we did!

the movie was so hilarious and i thoroughly enjoyed watching!! the rivalry between the 2 teams was sooo funny. i knew i was going to like the movie, but it did end up being a little bit fast-paced for me cause i basically dived in with like. 0.4 background,,,, like ya girl was strUGgLinG trying to keep up. but that's no one's fault but my own 😔 i was kind of hoping it'd be like the demon slayer mugen train movie (which is actually what got me into anime! but that's besides the point). where the premise would be simple enough that you wouldn't need that much context before watching. i knew the movie would basically be just one really long volleyball game so i figured it would be fine. alas, i was wrong 😭 i don't know the rules of the game or any of the characters/their positions so it was all i could do to just watch and try to understand everything as it was happening ;-;

another thing i wanna mention is that now that i've long since graduated from my "beginner weeb" phase and become a full-on weeb, i'm familiar with a lot of voices and voice actors so it's difficult for me to see new characters and their voice actors (that i already know from somewhere else) as one entity 🤔 i'm not sure if that makes a lot of sense ><

for example: the whole time we were watching the movie, i felt like kenma sounded a lot like yuki kaji (who voices shoto [mha] and eren [aot])?? but also didn't at the same time. it was bothering me the whole 2 hours but i looked it up after it was over and i was right 😩

i also immediately recognized kuro as gojo [jjk]/hawks [mha]/greed [fma]; so kuro wasn't even kuro to me, he was just a volleyball au gojo with a completely different look 😭 i feel like that kind of gets in the way of my viewing experience personally, because i couldn't pause and think about where i know this voice from (like i usually do when i start a new anime). but it bOThERs mE because it's like on the tip of my tongue and my mind caNnOT rEST until i confirm my suspicions 😩

anyway, going in, the only people i knew about were like. hinata and kageyama... and it was surface-level knowledge at best. but i've seen kenma around enough where i recognized his character design so i thought i might like him. and he ended up being super cute!! i loved him, but i also really loved kuro (he is very handsome 🥰) and the tall glasses guy from karasuno. he was funny as fuck. but i'm definitely interested in watching the show to see what other lovable goofs the story has to offer. i'm always on the hunt for more blorbos

tl;dr basically i loved the movie, i thought it was really funny; now i have to actually watch the show so i can really enjoy the experience the movie had to offer. the production was honestly great. my sister wants me to get caught up so we can watch it again while it's still in theaters lmao. we'll have to see about that... the first 2 seasons are 25 eps each and then there are at least a few more seasons (even if they are less eps) after that 💀 when i got into mha last year, i was able to blast through 6 seasons within a week,,, but that costed me 3 full days worth of binge-watching and several work nights to catch up 😩 idk if i can do that again

thank you for the ask and interacting with me 🥺🫶 i know your day just started so i hope it goes well!! have a nice rest of the week also <3

[irabelaswriting]

a small incentive update!!

chapter 16 is in the works! it’s still happening. Just not This week.

which is Not what i said would happen in the little A/N in my last update buuuuut

i’ve handed in my thesis! a couple of grueling days are ahead of me where i’ll just wait and see if my peers find it good enough to present :^)))

might as well write something angsty then riiiiight

or maybe even post what that snippet a couple of days ago was from👀

thank u all for ur patience. y’all are angels mwah!!💖

[hesokuri-wars]

Are you guys alright? Like, personally? I'm worried about you :[

✨I can only speak for myself, but I’m alright! Sorry to have just vanished without a word. I honestly didn’t intend to and always hoped I’d get back into the swing of this

Last year I started a new job that is really physically and sometimes emotionally exhausting. I’m very happy there!! But I also have 2 part time jobs on top of that, so I’m just a wee bit burnt out and tired lmao

I've been Chronically Offline for a while, not just here; working 5-7 days a week without weekends or holidays means my free time is quite limited. And yeah, that free time has not included Heso at all, so I really can’t answer any questions about the game from the last year even when I am rarely around :/

So like... when will I come back? Will I come back? Big shrug. I do love the game and this community, I just don’t have the energy for it like I used to. So don't get your hopes up, I guess. Sorry

(And yes, I literally can't figure out how to format my mod icon into this post ✌😎✨)

💙Mod Kara

(Actually, it's great that you don't have a mod icon, because I can't be bothered myself to recover my own batch of icons for this post. This is good.)

Heeey, anon. It's super sweet of you to have sent in this ask, so I thank you for your concern. To answer your question, I'm doing fine, too. Like Mod Kara, I've got a job as well, but unlike her, I'm as online as ever, so what's my excuse?

Well, I haven't exactly touched anything Heso-related in... since the last time I posted actual Heso news, whenever that was. At one point, I sort of just stopped opening up the game and mostly left things up to Mod Kara. Truth be told, it's been a long time since I've actively been interested in Heso for a variety of reasons, ranging from my issues with the game itself, my current dedication to other interests, and the admittedly less-than-ideal way that I perceive this blog that I've owned for the past 5 years.

I'm aware that my explanation isn't as... justified as Mod Kara's. She's not active because she genuinely has too much on her plate at the moment, while I'm not active for reasons that can essentially be boiled down to I Don't Want To. Because of that, I do feel some degree of guilt for not being around for people who follow this blog, so I'm not going to bother defending myself. All I can really say without going full-blown TMI is that there are a handful of different factors that contribute to my lack of motivation, and I simply can't take responsibility for a long-term help blog when I'm like this.

Does that mean I'm quitting, or does that mean I'll be back one day? I'll just repeat what Mod Kara said above: Big shrug. I've learned a long time ago that I'm wildly inconsistent, so I'd feel like I'm lying if I committed to one particular resolution right now. And thus... I guess you could say this is a really belated hiatus announcement?

(inb4 anyone asks if we can just get new mods on board: that would be the obvious solution, but those things have only led to mods being cyberstalked. out of the question.)

~Mod Ichi (I’m sorry if I’m late!) As for me... it’s really been a mixture of things! I’ve made a lot of big steps in my life and I’ve gotten a lot more busy at work now that I’ve taken on more roles. I also recently got married so that’s awesome! (Planning the reception party has been so stressful aaa...) My wife and I are also looking to move into a new place soon, so that has also been taxing.

But to be honest, it’s also because on my end, like Mod Ichi, I’ve also been interested in other things. Between work, my social obligations and my other hobbies, my attention has been pulled in a million different directions. I feel really bad and I’m sorry to all of the folks who still follow the blog and look for news / updates.

But all the same, thank you always to everyone for all of your support. It means a great deal and it’s very sweet of you to check on us. ~ 💚 Mod Choro

[enjennie]

Our Little Secret [Jaemin x Reader]

summary: How you ended up dating Na Jaemin and the struggles in hiding it from your brother Jeno.

genre: smut! fluff. secret relationship! au. brother's bestfriend au lmao

warnings: contains smut and profanity

a/n: hello! I've taken a really long break in writing and ALSO this is my first try in writing smut. Please excuse my inexperienced and beginner level in writing! enjoy ♡

On a normal day, you’d wake up at 8am nice and early to attend classes. But today was a weekend, and you hadn’t gotten much sleep thanks to your brother and his friends doing God knows in your backyard. Thus, explaining the hour in which you'd just woken up in being later than usual. You were just about to go down to get your first meal of the day at quarter to 12 in the afternoon.

“Hey, idiots! Call it a night, why don’t you?” You remember yelling through the window last night, scolding the boys.

You don’t know why you weren’t used to it yet. Every end of the month there would be boys night. Their favourite place to goof around in just so happened to be yours. Your parents were away on most nights, leaving their son in charge of the house more than not.

“Ya, Y/N! Go to bed,” yells Jeno, your brother who was the host of the night. You scowled and he does the same back at you. With heavy hands, you shut the window and wished it would block the noise out.

It was around 4 when you finally fell into a deep sleep, your earphones finally drowning out their screaming. No other reason as to why it took you that long to fall asleep at all. None at all. It wasn’t like you were waiting for a particular someone to slip into your room to give you some goodnight kisses.

Totally. Yeah, totally untrue. The truth is that you were waiting for Na Jaemin. You’ve been fooling around with him for a month now and you may or may not have asked him to come up for a bit.

You and Jaemin have been friends since your brother brought him home after school one day when you were little. Since then he’d become a familiar face around the house, always hanging about.

Unlike the other friends of your brother, Jaemin was different. Aside from being your brother’s closest friend, he wasn’t as wild and rowdy but rather calm and dare I say… maternal? He had the same vibe of a Kindergarten teacher. The other boys relied on him for advice and if they needed help with anything that had to do with adulting. You even caught Jaemin separating Jeno’s white and coloured clothes once and giving your brother an earful of why he should be doing them himself.

It all started when you came home one day, face strained with tears and mascara running down your cheeks. You’ve gotten dumped. The shittiest feeling ever. Jaemin just so happened to be passing by the house to drop over some video games he borrowed from Jeno when he saw you running towards the door. Before he could ask you what was wrong, you were already sobbing into his arms.

He's always been someone you found comfort in. You knew your feeling would just never be reciprocated so you did everything in your will to forget about it. But at that moment it just felt right, and Jaemin just so happened to be there at a time you needed someone the most.

You took him inside for some water and maybe a new change of shirt since you’d stained his with mascara. You didn’t expect to kiss him. You didn’t expect the kiss to lead into sex either. But soon enough your clothes travelled to the ground and you were pushing Jaemin into the pantry, too impatient to go up to your room but at the same time wanting a little privacy.

“Is this okay?” he breathed, hands roaming around your body in the dark. “I mean- your brother-“ he stutters.

“-isn’t here. Now make me feel good, Jaemin. Please,” you cut his sentence off. The last thing you wanted to think about before hooking up was your brother.

Your plea was the only push Jaemin needed. He was just helping you feel better after a breakup. Right? It’s not like he had underlying feelings for you since the first time Jeno introduced him to you. Right? Wrong again.

Jaemin knew things wouldn’t be the same for him after this, and he didn’t know if it was good or bad. Fuck, could I have at least told her I like her first? Jaemin was having an inner conflict all the while you were getting rid of his clothes bit by bit and touching him in places that felt so heavenly.

“Y/N, I like you,” he spat out.

You giggled, but you’d be lying if you said your heart didn’t jump with joy. “Woah, I know we’re about to have sex but you don’t have to confess to me, y’know. It’s fine,” He really didn't have to make your heart flutter like that. You'd accepted it was just sex and you'd pretend nothing ever happened after this.

He took you by the shoulders and stood in front of him. He was glad the lights were off, so you wouldn’t see him all flustered. “No, Y/N. I actually like you. I like you a lot,”

The silence in the pantry was deafening and Jaemin swears he could hear his heart beating through his own ears waiting for your response. Instead, he feels your warm lips on his. Nothing could have been a better response.

“Why didn’t you tell me sooner? I had to date so many jerks to try and get over you,” you whisper. Jaemin was grinning. He wanted the lights on now. He wanted to see you and hear what you just said to him. But he couldn’t find the switches so he just leaned in for another kiss.

The house is a mess and when you get to the living room you catch a glimpse of your brother and some of his friends laying on the couch and on the floor. Red cups and the TV playing on mute. You shake your head and sigh, knowing he’d get you to help him clean it up after. You don’t notice that the 7 boys in the living room was missing one.

When you get to the kitchen, you found the one missing boy from the group. Jaemin was up, flipping cooking up a breakfast. Compared to the living room, the kitchen was relatively clean. Only bowls, measuring cups and plates surrounded him for the pancakes he was cooking up.

He notices your presence and turns his head to face you, his smile instantly appearing on his pretty face.

“Morning, baby,” he greets, a sweet smile plastered on his face.

“Good morning,” you travel across the kitchen to get closer to him and take a peep of what he was cooking. His eyes follow you and he gets back to flipping the pancakes he had on the pan. He has to tear his eyes away from you.

You were clearly wearing his shirt. Getting braver, I see. You and him haven’t told anyone about the relationship yet. Not even Jeno. Jaemin’s been feeling horrible about it, but he wasn’t telling him only because you weren’t ready yet.

“You hungry? I made just enough for everyone,” he offers, directing his focus to the stove. The plate already had 10 steaming pancakes on it. It could probably fit 7 hungover boys and one starving you, right?

"Go set the table,” he doesn’t wait for your response because he knew without having to get one.

To your left were the plates and utensils already stacked and ready to go so you take them to set the table. The boys were still asleep so you tiptoe your way past them and quietly prepare the table. Jaemin follows suit, letting the smell of pancakes alone do the waking up for his friends. Although he wishes they take their time.

You take a seat, ready to dig in and he takes the seat beside you.

🔞 smut starts here

“Y/N, what would you say if I were to take you right now?” Jaemin’s question came out cool and easy, but it caused you to choke on the orange juice you were drinking.

You look to your right, where not too far away was your brother and his other friends in their slumber. Jaemin’s lips tug into a smirk at your reaction as he takes a bite of pancake.

“Pardon?” you ask, not quite believing what you’d just heard.

Jaemin leans closer to your ear this time before whispering, “I was asking what you’d do if I took you right now in the pantry,” his hand was reaching for the maple syrup beside you at the same time.

He sits back and uncaps it before pouring it slowly over his pancake. You watch him pour the smooth and sticky liquid and he watches as you bite down on your lip. He knew you were upset with him for not coming up to your room last night. But he simply couldn’t without being seen. He wanted to make it up to you for that.

“Your call,” he gets up and makes his way to the pantry room. You notice that the lights don’t go on from the small crack on the floor. After one last look at the living room, you take quick steps to follow him.

The moment you get through the door, Jaemin has you against the cabinet, his lips hungry and wanting.

“I’m really sorry I couldn’t do this last night,” he apologizes, biting your lips and earning a whimper from you.“They didn’t pass out until 4:30 and I figured you were asleep,” He was explaining but you were already way passed it.

You didn’t care anymore. Nothing else mattered, you just wanted him. “I don’t care,” you whisper.

Jaemin pushed through your shorts and felt you through your lace panties. You’d worn it just in case he came last night. "That’s what you missed out on,” you tell him and he chuckles.

Not wasting another second, Jaemin pushes the lace out of the way and inserts one finger. You gasp, holding onto him for support as your knees weakened at his touch.

“Let me make it up to you,” he bites on your earlobe before adding a second finger.

He starts pumping, setting his own pace and removing any tiredness you felt from having to wait for him all night. When he curls his fingers you’re sent into nirvana, and when he starts sucking on your neck on the spot he knows you like, you couldn’t help but let a moan slip.

Jaemin’s hand clamps over your mouth. His eyes had had adjusted to the dark and he could see your expression. You stare at him with wanting eyes and it’s enough for him to keep going, fastening the pace.

When the knot in your stomach tightens, you claw on Jaemin’s back and he picks up on the signal and hoists you onto the counter before lowering himself and pulling the lace down all the way. You spread yourself, awaiting him and when he presses his mouth to your heat. You're immediately thrown into a whole other world, tangling your fingers in his hair and gasping for air with each time you feel his tongue trace your folds. Soon enough, you were releasing onto him and Jaemin was lapping it up clean.

As you came down from your high he’d gotten up and was watching you with a satisfied smile on his face.

“Fuck,” you manage to say, too dumbed out to make out any other words to explain what you felt.

You feel him kiss your forehead before he whispers to you again, “We gotta go,”

You nod, gulping and try to compose yourself. You grab a box of cereal blindly in case Jeno and his friends were already awake and would be suspicious of them before following Jaemin to the door. He gives you another kiss before pulling the door open.

Just as you’d suspected, your brother had just gotten up from the couch and was walking in at the same time you’d gotten out. He looked at you both skeptically, but his hangover probably made it hard for him to process anything. He takes a seat and yawns. The rest of the boys enter the room after him.

“That’s my cereal,” Jeno points out at the Frosty Flakes you were carrying. Jaemin had taken his seat and continued eating the pancake he left like he wasn’t just eating something else a minute ago.

“Jaemin said he wanted some. So I showed him where it was,” you shrug before placing it on the table and grabbing your plate of half-eaten pancake. “Seeya,” you tell them, but it was directed to Jaemin.

“Seriously, do you take your brother for such an idiot to think he doesn’t suspect anything between us?” Jaemin sighs.

You could hear his heart beating steadily, finally calming down after the strenuous activity you’d just done. You have your head resting on his chest and you’ve been observing it, the pace and how it seemed to doubled when you traced lines along his arm.

You laugh, “I don’t think he’s an idiot. I find it a little fun to be hiding something from him,”

Jaemin didn’t find it fun at all. To him it felt like he was betraying Jeno. You knew how guilty Jaemin feels which is why you’d conjured a little plan. Some would probably say it’s going too far, but you called it a test of love. You knew Jeno had probably figured it out anyway.

“Don’t worry, he’s a big boy. Besides, he always says you’re like a brother to him. So why don’t I make you his brother-in law?”

You sit up to look at the boy in the dim lighting of his room. He looked glorious, basking in the only light source that came through his window from the moon. He brings up a hand to caress your cheek and you felt safe. It felt like home.

“Na Jaemin, what are you doing?”

The voice made Jaemin jump. It wasn’t yours, it was low and thunderous. It was someone he knew all too well, and he knew better than to make up an excuse. He’s been caught, this is it. This day was bound to come anyway.

Jaemin pulls his face away from yours, freezing in his place on your bed and turning his head to the door where sure enough, Jeno was standing. His hands were folded and pissed would be an understatement. Jaemin could see all the veins on his best friend’s arm and neck.

“Now… Jeno-“ Jaemin begins to explain. You watch as he tries to figure out the words to say. He’s calmly walking closer to his friend and has left your side on the bed where not moments ago he was just kissing you in. Jeno looks at him expectedly, waiting for a reason.

“Can we talk outside?” Jaemin quietly asks, but Jeno doesn’t move from his place in the doorway.

“I’d like to talk here,” your brother firmly states.

Jaemin sighs, looking back at you before preparing what he was about to say.

“Jeno I really like Y/N. Screw it, call it love. I'm in love with her and I’m a horrible friend for not telling you but we were going to tell you sooner or later anyway. I’m sorry you had to find out like this,” he sincerely apologizes.

Your lips part, listening to his words. He was taking the blame completely.

“You probably hate the shit out of me but I really like your sister, man. And I want nothing but to treat her with utmost care and give her everything she deserves,” he rambles.

Jeno was staring down at his friend and his eyes look over to you. When you told Jeno that you were dating Jaemin, he flicked your forehead harshly and said “I know. I’m not stupid,”

When you told him about how you wanted to see how Jaemin would react to getting caught, you didn’t need to ask twice. Jeno was onboard and wanted to do it as soon as possible. It was a good thing you went ahead and told him beforehand because if you hadn’t, Jaemin might have gotten something more than a flick on the forehead.

“And cut,” you say from behind the two boys. Jaemin’s eyebrows furrow together as he steps back and watches Jeno’s expression shift from anger to his regular smile. The boy looked between you siblings in pure confusion and you walk to clasp your fingers together. “You just got pranked, dude,”

“Wait, huh?” exclaims Jaemin. Jeno’s already laughing at this point and you’re cupping Jaemin’s face in your hands lovingly. “I told Jeno last night. I just wanted to see how you’d react,”

“You menaces!” Jaemin yells, pointing his finger between you and your brother.

“God, since we were young. Always pulling the pranks on me,” he huffs with a frustrated look on his face. You replace that with a smile by giving him a quick peck.

“Alright, I’m gonna leave ‘cus that’s gross to watch,” Jeno backs away, patting Jaemin on the shoulder and gesturing to his room down the hall. “Also,” he adds, catching both you and Jaemin’s attention.

“Stop hooking up in the pantry. Jesus Christ, are you guys exhibitionists?”