#questioning my gender

[yeahimatransman]

Signs from being younger that probably are signs of being trans:

Making a sock penis and wearing it in my room. Never admitting it, but wanting a penis.

Fantasizing that I was turned into a boy and choosing to stay that way.

Taking quizzes that claim to "guess your gender" and wanting to have the results say I was a boy.

This one makes me laugh, but pretending to be a boy when I would play on Club Penguin.

Really liking how I looked in our jazz band uniform which includes a men's dress shirt, dress pants, a tie, and a vest.

Signs in adulthood and right now that probably are signs of me being trans:

Buying a packer and really enjoying wearing it in public.

Loving the bulge my packer gives me and wanting to look at it all day long/wear it everyday.

Wanting a real penis.

I want a beard so bad.

Buying a binder and being frustrated that it didn't make me completely flat because I have a large chest. Kind of liking how it looked anyway when I was able to get over that and see that it did make my chest smaller.

Still fantasizing of being turned into a man and choosing to stay that way.

Going by he/him pronouns on here.

Changing my pronouns on Facebook to see it say "changed HIS profile picture" and seeing that I was listed as "brother" and "son" on my siblings and parents pages. (Changed it back out of fear of getting caught).

Changing my gender on Facebook to Male even though it's hidden.

Picturing myself in the future presenting as male with short hair, a beard, and having gotten top surgery.

I want to be a man.

AND YET I am still struggling with believing I am actually trans or that I should move forward with transitioning. There is so much that goes into this. Internalized transphobia. Inability to let go of my religion even if I don't necessarily believe because it's what I have known my whole life and all my friends are there. Religious trauma and being told that my being a woman is eternal and divine. Fear of disappointing my family and friends or confusing them/ruining our relationships. Messing with the status quo at almost 28 years old. Not being taken seriously. I probably should see a gender therapist.

I just really needed to get that all out. If anyone has any advice or ideas or maybe even just validation, I would really appreciate it.

[my-daughter-thunt]

…I think I might be a girl

[demigod-jack-hearth]

My gender isn't gendering

[thehouseofkitten]

Happy pride from my family to you! 💘 This is my first pride since coming out as questioning my gender and this is my I don't know how many prides has a pansexual person! I just want to say if anyone is feeling lost or alone just know you're not on this month you have a family with me and my partner and our little hammie and my partners doggie!

We love and respect you! FREE HAMMIE MOM HUGS FOR ALL!

PLUR 💟

[entity56]

Maybe... bigender??

[3d-th3-d3d]

Submitting my thoughts for peer review because I’m confused by my own mind so maybe other people’s experiences could help me understand mine

So I’ve identified as a trans man and demiguy for quite a while now. Went thru many many MANY different labels before settling on that one. But I really don’t know what gender I feel like if any. Could very well be the alexithymia and autism making it hard for me to know but I digress.

I would prefer to be read as male. I typically dress masculine but I do enjoy dressing feminine from time to time. The problem with that is that I don’t feel pretty even in outfits that I think are beautiful by themselves. I look like a man in a dress and not in a good way. Whether it’s internalized transphobia or something I have no idea but when I wear something particularly femme I wanna look pretty like a girl. I wanna have a little more curve and I wanna have a little thicker thighs and fuller breasts and that kinda stuff. But I’m too skinny which is a problem on it’s own and I don’t even have a face that’s pretty for a girl. I know that presentation doesn’t equal gender but still yknow.

So if anyone has any input I’d greatly appreciate it. Maybe I’m right that I’m a demiguy, maybe I’m bi-gender or agender or gender-fluid or something. I just know I’m not cis.

[banethebloodgoat]

Questioning my gender again, who knows, I might be a boy, a girl, or a creature from hell

Anyways, back to pondering things

[sunnylittlebisexual]

Had a 🎊Gender Crisis🎊 at 2am and You All get to Witness it!!!!! 🤪🤪🤪

but anyway i realized I never feel male??????....EVER. like it's been months and months and I haven't felt male once???? Have I felt masculine? Definitely. Have I bound my chest to be flatter? Sure. Have i been a Little Guy but not a Man?? YES!! Have I felt genderless? Yeah. Have I felt female and also less female? Yep. Have my pronouns been he/him at least once in the last while too? Absolutely!! I'm so confused!!! I don't feel totally non-binary though...Am I a demigirl? CAN i be a demigirl and use he/him pronouns on occasion??! Am I just some Cis who likes to wear baggy/comfy clothes???? Wtf!!! Have i been lying to myself (or others) about feeling male??? Am I an imposter?? Would it be bad or wrong if I'm unlabeled for a time??? Fuck!!! 😰😰😰

TL;DR: I don't identify as genderflux anymore because I don't ever feel male

[umbramus]

WHAT AM I?!!

Am I girl? Am I boy? Neither?! Both?!!

[stars-on-my-bedroom-ceiling]

i've recently been thinking i'm pangender/something close to that

idk why i'm shouting this to the whole world but yeah

because sometimes i wanna be a girl

and sometimes i wanna be more agender leaning

and--yeah you get it i want to be a lot of things

maybe bigender girl and nonbinary?

[kikothedragoncat]

My gender? 1970-89 rock guitar.

[crimsoncorpse03]

Unrelated / personal life post

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I'm questioning my gender ansjsbdjdh um I think I might be ftm or demiboy or atleast more masc presenting djdhsjdhdhr. He/they pronouns still plz but uhhhh I prefer he/him currently. Also I still go by basil but I'm thinking abt experimenting with the name max !! °\(^o^)/°

[georgiesblurredbones]

there’s nothing wrong with detransition or with feeling like your identity or labels may have changed!! if you’re a lesbian that’s awesome! being gay is cool as hell <3 it’s not uncommon for transmascs to realize we resonate with wlw dynamics

This Is Actually Rlly Sweet 2 Be Seeing In My Inbox, Especially From Someone I(Probably) Don’t Know :3 Thank U Whoever U R For Sending This In 2 Me. I’ve Been Struggling With My Identity For As Long As I Can Remember And This Just Gave Me All of The Verbal Validation I’ve Needed For So Long. I Know I’ve Never Been Completely Male, Yeah I Relate To Male Characters Half The Time But I End Up Headcanoning/Designing Nearly All of Them As Transfem/Non-Binary. I’ve Never Been Fully Male Even Though I Wear a Binder Almost Every Day, I’ve Never Been Fully Non-Binary Even Though I Like Being Called ‘They/Them’, I’ve Never Been Fully Female Even Though I Like Stereotypically Female Things, But I Know I Will Only Ever Be Able To Like Women, Regardless of My Gender, Like Yeah Men Are Alright Ig But Women R Lowkey My Thing. I Don’t Know What I Am But I Hope I Figure Out Soon, But There’s Always Time 2 Figure That Stuff Out. Thank U Again Anon, Ur The Nicer Person Ever :3

Me 2 This Specific Anon /Pos:

[bookwyrminspiration]

every time I think about my gender I get confused so I simply stopped thinking about it. it is not my problem

[macabreroni]

boygirl kinda fire..

holy crap?!?!?!? gay people?!?!

[sm0gg9]

kissed a man, first kiss, i think i need to work something out within myself.

i don't know how to just say "no"

He asked me to be his "girlfriend" I said "Yes"

now i regret it so much, i don't know what to do.

i hate that we work in the same buliding.

I don't think i'm attracted to him at all, I feel bad.