#putting her upside down was kind of funny to me. i think she looks pretty decent tho

[prettycottonmouthlamia]

>Good post! Really well-put together analysis of the branch.

Thank you! Like genuinely, it's actually a good feeling.

>But i find it difficult to even look at Wiš'adel as a Flinger. She just ignores the identity of the branch so much by dealing incredibly high damage to high defense enemies all by herself, hitting flying enemies (I didn't know Rosmontis could bypass that limitation with a future Branch, but even then she needs another operator helping her to do it) and I agree that flyers aren't an issue, especially not when you're not in IS and have access to your entire roster, but it is still part of the branch's identity. Even her attack animations don't sell her as a Flinger to me. Going by the module short, the original name of the branch is probably something like "Bombardment Sniper", but both Greyylter and TRC throw something in the traditional way and Rosmontis throws something non-traditionally with her big invisible hands. If I didn't know what Wiš'adel was and you showed me a clip of her without revealing her attack range, I'd think she was still an Artilleryman Sniper. Because of this, I don't consider her a win for Flingers. They made her a Flinger to let her abuse the upsides they have while letting her ignore the drawbacks that come with the branch. Which yes, could be described as her being a look at what the branch could be, as you said, but blowing past the limitations just isn't it for me.

So there's a few things I want to bring up here because I think they're important. I do consider Wis'adel to be a Flinger at heart. Her kit would be noticeably worse if she wasn't one. It wouldn't just be in terms of raw damage either, it would also be in consistency. Wis'adel is ultimately designed to make the most use of her class's quirks, and you can see that if you look at her S1 and S2.

Wis'adel's S1 and S2 are also quite good skills, and they actually follow the design perspectives that you would expect them to. They get overshadowed a lot by her S3, but S1 and S2 are good, honest, Flinger skills at their core, and their helped by Wis'adel having good numbers.

Ultimately, I think this is more a result of how just how barebones the class is, so the result you get is the class having these long stints between releases of operators.

Rosmontis: 11/1/2020-11/15/2020 || 4/30/2021-5/14/2021 Greyy: 7/5/2022-7/19/2022 || 3/14/2023-3/28/2023 Wis'adel: 5/1/2024-5/15/2024 || 8/31/2024-9/14/2024

I've also included CN dates because when we're talking about Greyy, that means Dorothy's Vision, an infamously delayed event lol. The difference between Rosmontis and Wis'adel was three and a half years, which is kind of absurd. There are other classes with pretty big gulfs between 6-star releases and they honestly have that same sort of feeling too: look at Pozemka versus Schwarz, Typhon vs Rosa, Mountain vs Chongyue, Hellagur vs Zuo Le...you know.

If we had gotten a solid intermediate between Rosmontis and Wis'adel, one that wasn't dealing with the insane numbers Wis'adel is but wasn't necessarily hampered as badly by her kit as Rosmontis, I think Wis'adel would have been a lot more understandable, especially in terms of kit design. As it is now though, yeah it's pretty massive whiplash. I'm not gonna sit here and be like "You need to agree with my opinion or else" though because this ultimately is just personal opinion and taste.

>The branch on a surface level is designed to clear crowds of weak enemies, not to nuke down elites or bosses. Similar to Splash Casters (who are also quite disliked in an overblown manner).

So I'm not disagreeing here per se, I just think it is a little funny that Rosmontis's one CC clear is...nuking down elites and bosses lol. I'm going to link the Risk 31 clear that uses her (alongside Bagpipe) to take out the Bladehelm Recruit and the Risk 30 clear that uses her for that same Recruit but also to kill the Withered Knight. They're neat clears! Definitely a window in the possibility of what Rosmontis might have done in a CC like CC6 if it wasn't for the release of Chen the Holungday.

>Also about Dusk: She was considered pretty bad until her ModY came out. She wasn't that bad, her S2 in particular was/is quite powerful, but ModY really elevated her and helped her fulfill the phantasy of using her S3 to put up a mass of summons to hold back groups of enemies.

Yeah I didn't touch on Dusk much because I couldn't exactly remember what the hype level was around her release. I think it was initially positive but less positive than I remember Mostima being lol.

>On release, people were disappointed by how "bad she is at levitating enemies" when that isn't even really the point. The levitation is just a means to an end, that being activating her silence and damage boost, as well as disrupting attack windups. Her S2 deals really good damage (450% atk per attack), S1 is way more consistent in actually levitating enemies than you'd think, because enemies tend to enter her range one by one and S3 is alright. It has good use-cases and excels against large bosses, cause she can hit them with three tornados at once.

Yeah Ho'ol is the one that's the "wife" in that sentence. I think even calling Silence the Paradigmatic bad is a little mean, even though her kit is very strangely designed.

Ho'olheyak suffered a lot from aesthetic complaints, my least favorite kind. People wanted the tornadoes from her S3 to levitate entire groups of enemies instead of just one, and this bugged them enough to call her bad by extension.

I have rather poor views of the wider community's ability to discern whether Operators are good or not, if this isn't clear lol. I actually really like Ho'ol, she's well designed in that all three of her skills have uses but she definitely suffers from not being the most consistent of the Core Casters. When you're competing with Eyja and Ceobe, it is ultimately a little rough. Her S2 is secretly her goat skill I'm pretty sure tho

How the Arknights Community was Wrong on One of Arknight's Most Powerful Classes

Or, alternatively, you all need to apologize to Rosmontis right now.

Flingers are experiencing a modern Renaissance right now. Thanks to the release of Wis'adel and the introduction of Rosmontis's absolutely busted IS module, it seems like things are on the up and up for Flingers. Even Greyy the Lightningbearer is a common sight in high level IS runs, and he doesn't even have a broken module.

How on Earth did this happen, when it wasn't very long ago that Flingers were the butt and punchline of their own joke?

The Original Let's start with how the archetype was introduced into the game: Rosmontis. Rosmontis was released alongside Mudrock for the Chapter 8 release event, and the reception was pretty mixed. Rosmontis was a limited operator, and to this point, limited operators in Arknights had been pretty middling. Nian wasn't really conclusively better than Hoshiguma, and W was good but nothing special. We were not at the point yet where Dusk or Skadi the Corrupting Heart had been released, so the running joke was typically to roll on the other operator on a limited banner. Mudrock was a really strong laneholder that still sees a lot of use today, and Weedy is by far the strongest shifter operator ever released.

It's also worth noting that Rosmontis was released during a general downturn of opinions on AoE ranged operators. Leonhardt and Meteorite were considered actually quite strong in the early days of Arknights, and I know this must sound crazy, but Mostima and W were actually super hyped for their release. People thought Mostima, base-ass Mostima with no modules, was good. But after CC Blade, and a general stint of CCs where AoE operators made relatively poor performances, the tide had shifted. Operators like Eyjafjalla and Angelina (god remember when Angelina was considered really good. Well I guess she is now. Regardless) had AoE capabilities but were much cheaper in DP and had solid secondary skills for dealing with single enemies. So people were generally pretty down on AoE operators, which wasn't helped later on by the release of Passenger, an operator considered so bad it resulted in several attempts by Hypergryph to make him better (the retrospective view is that while Passenger was bad, he was made out to be a lot worse than he was, a view I agree with).

These two factors did not help the views of Rosmontis as an operator, but it was also further not helped by what content was available to use Rosmontis in: Contingency Contract. Rosmontis, tragically, released after the first theme of Integrated Strategies came and went, and so the only high level content available to use her in was CC. CC is particularly harsh to Flingers as we'll discuss, but this is also something that Wis'adel has managed to avoid as there hasn't been a CC since her release. The only difficult content since Wis'adel's release has been IS and RA, two game modes that honestly favor Flingers as we'll discuss later on. There was just nowhere to use Rosmontis in more difficult content where she didn't feel bad.

Flingers are a pretty interesting subclass, and Arknights has really not designed any subclasses to be like them, ultimately. They have a very impressive attack range, higher bulk than other ranged operators, and a unique gimmick to their attacks: they will deal an additional hit of damage, but one that only has 50% of their ATK. In addition to this, Flingers are the only Sniper subclass that cannot hit aerial enemies without certain conditions being met (Wis'adel's S3, Rosmontis S3 with an aerial blocker).

In general, this results in a class that is very good at dealing with large groups of enemies with only modest DEF stats. This is because DEF ends up having an increased effect on Rosmontis' damage, because it will apply to both of her hits. An enemy with 375 DEF will, after the 175 Def ignore from her talent, reduce her attack damage by a total of 400.

This for a lot of people was sort of the final straw that broke the Rosmontis back. Her vulnerability to enemies having DEF was a problem, and it was generally stated to be in a way that other DPS checks would avoid. In addition, if we take a look at ideal DPS scenarios with the introductory 6-star for each Sniper class:

Ray: 1,346.22 Narantuya: 1,062 Schwarz: 880.28 Exusiai: 815.99 Chen the Holungday: 647.17 Rosmontis: 601.71 Fartooth: 583.88 Rosa: 539 W: 373.93

Rosmontis is very middle of the pack, losing in particular to Exusiai. Now, Exusiai also had the problem of being very soft to enemy DEF stats. Honestly, it should be noted that Rosmontis was always hitting higher DPH than Exusiai would for her normal attack damage.

(I've been getting really into Desmos lately)

Now this is all just auto-attack stuff and I don't want this to be exclusively a Rosmontis analysis by any means (although it's coming). The point here is that there was a pretty common conception that Rosmontis didn't really have a place in the meta, because Exusiai was so dominant in that spot. It's not hard to understand why. If we look at their S3 DPS really quickly...

At low DEF values, Exusiai is overdominant. This isn't super surprising, as she has a lot of factors working in her favor: a busted 5 hit S3, an attack interval reduction as well as a sizable ASPD buff from her talent. But it doesn't take a huge amount of defense for Rosmontis to come out on top. The specific DEF number is 580, roughly. Then, the perks of Rosmontis's S3 come to light: it's larger DEF ignore, it's halved attack interval, and it's much larger ATK buff.

This being said, there are still things working against Rosmontis, like her skill cycle being very long, and her own ATK buff resulting in Warfarin's buff being diluted compared to Exusiai. If you take a look at CC results, it is true that Rosmontis only has one top to her name: CC Spectrum, where she is part of a Risk 31 clear alongside Exusiai, which is pretty cool. But CCs, which often increase enemy DEF while reducing friendly ATK, are just very harsh to Flingers. Given that it is a class so sensitive to DEF and ATK changes to hit breakpoints, most CCs just hit Rosmontis in a double bind.

Funnily enough, Exusiai also doesn't have any top clears in CC past this point too, which is interesting to point out.

(For those counting: Rosmontis: CC5 Exusiai: CC1, CC5)

Rosmontis' position probably wasn't helped past this point by the release of Chen the Holungday either, and the rest is history. Rosmontis goes down as one of the weaker 6-stars in the game. People feel bad when they roll her. People on this website nurse weird ass grudges against her.

The Blip

It would be remiss of me to not remind people about Greyy the Lightningbearer. Greyy was a 5-star, which means that 99% of players ignored his existence, Gamepress made a dogshit summary about him that was made by people who don't play the game, and life moved on. We're going to talk about Greyy in more detail later on because he is important to talk about...

Oh well right now

Lone Trail: The Update That Should Have Changed Everything

Lone Trail was a super massive event, releasing three 6-stars that can be kindly regarded as "good but nothing amazing, bad, and my wife". It also introduced to the game the Flinger Modules, and I'm going to tell you all a secret. You and me, real close now.

It's fucked up these modules didn't receive more hype.

These modules gave Flingers a second shockwave hit. Now that doesn't seem all that impressive. After all, you might think to yourself, that shockwave still deals 50% damage. But the addition of an extra shockwave really changed the numbers of the game, because it meant a huge chunk more damage.

At minimum (673 DEF roughly) this module improves her damage by about 45%. That's pretty crazy for a module as it stands, but if you want to see the full chart, here you go. Arknights Youtubers hire me.

The extremely high peak there, where Rosmontis is doing more than triple the damage she was originally is actually getting to the exact point where Rosmontis without a module moves towards dealing scratch damage. This is pretty common with modules involving physical DPS operators, such as Blaze, to have very unique high points.

But this is 45% just off of, what is essentially

An extra shockwave

60 more points of DEF Ignore

+75 ATK attribute

This is a remarkably tame talent upgrade. The base effect, the second shockwave, is pulling so much work here. These numbers will be a bit more tame when you compare with S2 (already comes with +2 shockwaves) or S3 (already has some DEF shred) but this is still a very impactful module.

It also impacts the stun chance on her S2. Without her module, and having 4 total hits per attack, this puts her stun chance at roughly 59.04% per attack. The additional hit raises those chances to 67.232%. Not a massive increase, but it does help to patch up her odds.

This is also why Greyy's module was so important. Greyy's slow is tied to his talent, and hence the jump from 2 hits to 3 hits is very notable. Without his module, Greyy has a 64% chance to slow the enemy with every attack. With his module, those chances go up to 78.4%! That's pretty significant! He also deals 15% more damage to Slowed enemies too, which is a pretty strong mod on top of the extra shockwave. I haven't actually done Greyy's numbers, but it really does make him a lot more consistent at slowing enemies.

So now we're here, with Flinger's getting a surprisingly good module. They now deal 3 hits per attack, with Rosmontis dealing 5 hits per attack with her S2, which is actually relevant for Lone Trail (Rosmontis can remove a clean 250 DEF with every one of her attacks during her S2 against Arc Screenguards). So what happened?

Well...Flingers weren't popular, were widely regarded as a flawed class, and mostly passed over. It just wasn't worth it to people to raise Rosmontis or Greyy the Lightningbringer even if you had some inkling their module was good.

The Return of Integrated Strategies and Reclamation Algorithm

A miracle the likes of which Hypergryph may never do again...well okay maybe they will, they do be kind of nailing it on the alternate gamemodes, we have the return of Integrated Strategies and Reclamation Algorithm. These modes are actually uniquely situated in comparison to CC to benefit Flingers over other classes. This is largely because of how these modes chose to scale difficulty and the tools they give you to combat this.

In IS, enemy difficulty typically results in scaling HP and ATK buffs, and that's it. It's rare to see enemy DEF buffs in IS. In addition, many relics in IS focus on increasing ATK or ASPD or improving damage dealt. Flingers get much and much better when they deal damage with their shockwaves, and it is pretty easy to do that in IS. Rosmontis's S2 is of special note here: with her module, it deals 5 hits of damage, which means it benefits from ATK buffs to the same degree as Exusiai does, but with a lot of added perks. DEF ignore, a moderate AoE radius, and a chance to stun. This skill is way more dangerous with additional ASPD.

Greyy also benefits a ton here. Extra ASPD allows him to basically permanently lock down entire groups of enemies with slow. This is something that can also sort of be done with Chain Casters, but notably, Chain Casters can only slow down a certain number of enemies at a time with each of their attacks. Since slowed enemies tend to create clusters, Greyy can slow down entire waves of enemies with his attacks, while still dealing pretty impressive damage.

The only issue is the aerial enemies. I haven't mentioned this up until now, because in my opinion, it is the single most overhyped drawback in the entire game. There are tons of events and chapter releases where this basically doesn't matter. Aerial enemies are, for all intents and purposes, rather rare in Arknights. But in IS this is important. Flingers need some degree of map knowledge to use well. But your Sniper ticket is not necessarily the only solution to aerial enemies in any IS, and chances are you'll find more than one. For IS3, you can pick up Kroos Alter and Rosmontis and in the grand majority of situations be completely fine.

Of course, if you play IS5, this basically isn't an issue and Rosmontis is the second stronger Flinger in the game, and I think arguably the second strongest Sniper pick?

I almost forgot RA by the time I went to post this, so it's a good thing I went back because, yes, Flingers and Rosmontis are also good there too. It's literally designed for Flingers to be good, it's huge mobs of enemies all clustered closely around each other. You can use Provisions to give Rosmontis a ton of ATK or ASPD and watch her go ham on like 115 exploding spiders. They also have amazing range for vision on resource maps and have multi-hit mechanics for those stupid locks.

It's like, impressive how nicely Flingers slot in here. I'm really curious how Greyy feels when you give him one of the ASPD provisions so he has +60 ASPD.

Rosmontis CRAVES your Coagulate Supplements!!!!

The End-Times: Wis'adel and Rosmontis's Busted Module

If you've ever wanted to know how we got to this renaissance, it was Wis'adel being released, having absolutely busted numbers on her kit that basically ensured that her shockwaves would always do damage, and then going and soloing IS3 A15 like it was fucking nothing.

Wis'adel proved Flingers could be fucking fantastic.

Rosmontis has actual problems in her kit, she's ultimately a pretty early Limited operator with all the design choices that carries. Wis'adel is what you get when you ask "how far can a Flinger go?" The shockwave mechanic works well with her huge numbers and her shadow status effect. Her summons work to keep as many enemies as possible attached with a shadow. Her blast radius is massive. Honestly the fact she can blow up the UFOs in IS3 barely matters.

Soon after that, Rosmontis got her specialized Module. I've seen people complain about this. You're wrong. There's no fucking way this module should be allowed to be used in general content. It is, in fact, maybe the most busted specialized module they've released. It completely changes Rosmontis as an operator. Benefitting from Caster relics is insane for themes like IS3 which has a ton of genuinely broken ones, her new and improved equipment are insanely powerful, and the fact that she allows every Sniper and Caster to create a free rather tanky blocker with a crazy debuff effect is like

You understand this module is nuts? Surely?

The trait wouldn't really make Rosmontis meta anyhow. It would improve her damage by a lot but puts her, rather frustratingly, into the camp of mixed offensive operators who now have to worry about enemy RES values coming into play. Plenty of the enemies with decent DEF stats that Rosmontis struggles with now also come with sizable RES stats. As I've mentioned in my brief thoughts on Dagda, there are a ton of enemies Dagda hits harder by brute force than Indra does by trying to side-step the bigger stat.

It's also okay that the module is IS only, because IS is where Flingers are just at their best. Nothing is stopping you from using Rosmontis in general content, especially with her still really good BOM-X module!

Flingers, ultimately, are just a well-designed class. They have great range, AoE, and having extra instances of damage is always incredibly powerful. I do think Rosmontis has some kit issues, but I also think that a lot of people immediately dismissed her as bad based on community consensus. You want to know a cool thing about Rosmontis I haven't brought up yet? She can attack invisible enemies with her S3. Invisible enemies feel a lot more common than aerial enemies do, hell Lappland the Decadenza's event is literally a bunch of invisible enemies.

But like, that's never seen as a positive to Rosmontis unless you're a Sniperknights player and then you might just say Totter is better (and I get that, he is a bit more consistent). Rosmontis can hit an entire enemy type with her S3 that Wis'adel can't, but it's seemingly never mentioned. It's just...this community is very strange, you know?

Try Rosmontis out, hell try her out with Shamare or Warfarin. If you use Exusiai a bunch (godspeed soldier it's been rough since the Chen days), you probably already have those operators. Try Greyy out too. Then, if you really want the challenge, E0 Level 1 Wis'adel. Come on. You know that's better than like half the cas-

[sharkiethedork]

Wheeeee Art Fright! I used the "Tarot" prompt to put Thaddeus and Rory in tarot cards that I think fit them well.

As usual, Thaddeus is having the better time between the two.

(Link to Art Fright 2024 post)

[loveinhawkins]

Robin’s always had a soft spot for Eddie Munson, but up until recently it had been in a distant kind of way; she appreciated his class clown act, the way it had a domino effect of keeping the heat off the band kids, how he hogged the spotlight for any passing douchebag’s attention.

But then they both literally dive into The Upside Down, and her appreciation reaches a whole new level.

They’re in the Wheeler’s garage, thanking their lucky stars that four bikes exist in 1983 (and yeah, Robin’s sure that if she thinks about the whole time thing for half a second more her brain will promptly melt, so she doesn’t).

Each of them are pushing their chosen bike down the driveway, in a dazed sort of silence—the high of the Lite-Brite worn off in the face of another grim journey through The Upside Down.

Steve is flagging, Robin can hear it: his breathing’s growing laboured as he walks, an occasional unsteadiness to him that’s setting her anxiety off all over again, because what if they were wrong, what if it’s really rabies, and it’s too late, it’s coursing through his veins, and he’s—they’re gonna lose him—

“Hey, Harrington,” Eddie says, swinging a leg over his saddle, “wanna race?”

“… Hmm? Sorry, what?” Steve says.

There’s not even that long of a delay in him speaking, but the pause still has Robin’s heart in her throat.

Eddie’s got one foot on a pedal now, ready to set off. He looks back at them with a shaky grin—like he’s terrified, but he’s still gonna have some fun anyway.

“I’m throwing down the gauntlet, King Steve. Bet I’ll be faster than you.”

Steve scoffs, stands up a little straighter before he mirrors Eddie, balancing on the bike with one foot on the pedal.

“How much are we betting?”

Eddie huffs. “Oh, no money involved,” he says nonchalantly. He raises an eyebrow in challenge. “This is just for the glory.”

And God, there’s that spark back in Steve’s eyes; it’s like Robin can physically see his competitive streak giving him strength.

Eddie Munson, you beautiful soul, she thinks, I could kiss you.

“Faster than me? Yeah, maybe in your dreams, Munson,” Steve says.

But Eddie’s already speeding off with a comical whoop; Steve curses as he hurriedly tries to catch up, yelling, “You dick, that’s cheating!”

“Not in my rulebook!” Eddie says with a cackle.

And for a little while, that’s enough to put Robin’s mind at ease: watching the pair of them taunt each other like kids—hearing Nancy laugh at the spectacle as she bikes alongside her.

But then she falls through the Gate, Eddie close behind her, and they freeze when Steve screams Nancy’s name with such fear.

Robin’s plunged back into a mind-numbing panic; she’s sure that her heart doesn’t even begin to slow until they’ve left the trailer park, until Steve’s control of the RV switches from ‘holy shit, we’re on the run, what have our lives become?’ to something more normal—the reliable, measured driving she’s familiar with, taking her to and from school or work.

Finally, she has time to, um… take stock. Of… things.

She wobbles her way over to Eddie, grabbing onto his elbow as Steve takes a turning.

Eddie instantly holds her up, a steadying hand around her waist. “Oh, hi. I’ve gotcha—” “Your music isn’t actually shit,” Robin says in one breath. “I know, um, on balance, it’s probably not the worst thing I could’ve said, but the delivery was—but, you know, considering I thought Nance was literally about to die, I’d say it was, like, kinda calm all things considered, but—”

Eddie’s chuckling. “Yeah, on balance,” he echoes teasingly, “you were pretty damn funny, actually. Uh, sorry for. Um. Screaming at you? Basically?”

“Basically,” Robin agrees. “Yeah, you were like impressively loud. Not quite eardrum-rupturing level, but y’know, I don’t actually know anyone who’s really had that happen to them; Amanda Wallis said she ruptured hers at the pep rally ‘cause she was standing too close to us—the band, I mean, but—”

Eddie rolls his eyes. “Oh, that’s bull, there’s no way that’d be loud enough to—”

“—I think she just had a grudge ‘cause David C on mellophone got literally the tiniest bit of spit on her, and he was only—”

“Yeah, well, everyone knows you sit in the splash zone at your own risk.”

“Exactly! She’s had plenty of time to learn marching band protocol.”

“Uh-huh, protocol,” Eddie echoes again, with a giggle.

He’s got a nice kind of laugh, Robin thinks: one where she’s never in doubt that he’s laughing with her rather than at her.

“That stuff you do’s pretty cool,” he says; with his free hand, he actually imitates her mime of playing a trumpet. “You must have good, uh…” She can see the exact moment that he’s having second thoughts about saying it, but he forges ahead anyway, with a hilariously uncertain, “Good… lungs?”

“Fascinating attempt at a compliment,” Robin says. “Luckily for you, I accept insults as, like, equal tokens of friendship.”

Eddie does a double take. He doesn’t go so far as letting out a questioning, “We’re friends?”, but he might as well have said it anyway: his eyes widen for a moment, like someone who’s just been unexpectedly asked out to prom.

Steve takes another turning; he does it smoothly enough, but even he can’t stop the RV from moving with it, and Robin stumbles again, very nearly ends up repeating how she toppled right onto Eddie in The Upside Down.

“Woah there, you’re good,” Eddie says, “just gotta find your, uh, what’s it called? Your equilibrium.”

“I don’t have any,” Robin says, all theatrical devastation, and Eddie snorts.

“Sure you do, Buckley. Look, just take my—yeah, that’s it, then just kinda straighten up… yeah, you’ve got it.”

And yes, after a minute or so, Robin’s footing does feel more certain, but she still keeps a stubborn grip on Eddie’s elbow, just in case.

“God, d’you know what I’m gonna do when all this is over?” Eddie says.

“Pray tell.”

“I’m gonna make a list. What was it you said, Madonna, Blondie…? Whatever, I’m getting all of them, m’never getting caught out like that again.”

“I’m hoping that needing music to evade the clutches of a serial killer from an alternate dimension is, um, strictly a one-time thing.”

“Don’t care,” Eddie says. “Still buying those tapes. Just in case.”

And yeah, it’s said partly in jest, but Robin can hear that he means it. Still, it’s the most optimistic that she’s heard him be so far: making plans for after, like he can really see a way through this. Like maybe he finally knows that they’ll help him get there.

“Need a list of tapes from you too, Buckley. You and Harrington.”

Robin smiles. Her first thought is of singing Total Eclipse of the Heart from the dirt-ridden floor of a mall bathroom, but then she thinks of every car ride with Steve, every time they’ve turned up the radio to belt along, and she knows that there are way too many songs to count.

“Forget a list,” Robin says, “I could fill a book. Same for big boy over there.”

Eddie blinks, like he’s suddenly taking stock, too. “Oh yeah,” he says, laughing lightly, “I did say that, huh?”

“Sure did. I was doubting my ears, too.”

Robin had been hoping they’d long since reached the point of being able to joke around with one another. But while Eddie does laugh again, he also starts biting at his thumbnail, glancing over at Steve in the driver’s seat.

“Um, hey.” Robin manages to keep her balance, briefly pressing her knee against his leg. “I didn’t mean anything by it, Eddie.”

“No, I know.” Eddie huffs self-effacingly. “I’ve kinda got permanent foot-in-mouth disease, my report cards would tell you that.”

Well, if he wants to pass it off as sometimes I just say the darnedest things, Robin would be a hypocrite to deny him.

It fascinates her in a sad sort of way though, how he veers between joking and nervousness—like he’s worried he’s intruding on their group, of overstepping somehow.

She wants to tell him: Look, we all got dragged into this, but we chose to stick around, and you’re no different.

But she no longer has the aftermath of Russian drugs to help bypass her own nerves, to kickstart her sincerity.

“Hey, you’re awfully quiet back there,” Steve calls, and Eddie startles.

Robin shakes her head. “Not us, that’s his—”

“Hello? Henderson, I’m talking to you.”

“We’re not even doing anything!” Dustin shouts back in exaggerated affront.

He’s sat on the backseat of the RV, peering out the window along with Lucas, Erica and Max. Robin stifles a chuckle at the sight; they look like they’re on a field trip—the cool kids at the back of the bus.

“Yeah, well, just checking,” Steve says, amused. “For all I know, you coulda been building a gigantic radio again on, like, the roof of this thing.”

“Cerebro,” Dustin says, just as Eddie lets out a baffled, “Uh, again?”

But then they’re pulling into The War Zone’s parking lot, and any chatter abruptly dies.

Afterwards, Steve gets off the road to park in a reassuringly deserted field. They don’t head outside right away (Robin’s not exactly looking forward to prepping Molotov cocktails), instead staying in the RV to eat junk food they’d grabbed beforehand.

Robin discovers that Dustin’s somehow bought five more cans of Pringles and snorts, declaring, “You’ve got a problem.”

At some point, Steve tries to sneak off to the bathroom so he can change his dressings—“And use actual proper bandages!” Robin calls to him; no offence to Nancy’s resourcefulness, but the torn shirt strips only do so much good.

It becomes a more comical than horrifying event, although she’s sure that’s down to Steve deliberately making it so, like a sleight of hand trick: playing it down as he keeps talking to the kids throughout, never wincing even once.

He ends up having to keep the bathroom door open to continue an argument with Erica over which Scoops Ahoy sundae was the best of all time—then figures that he might as well just step out into the open anyway.

At least the wounds have stopped bleeding—although the sight of Steve cleaning around them with bottled water is one that Robin could personally do without.

The kids are entirely unfazed. They flock to Steve, peering at the glimpses he lets them see like he’s just got a cool tattoo. Robin supposes that after El and whatever nightmare wormy thing was in her leg, they’ve seen everything.

Eddie, however, is another matter. He keeps quiet about it, not obvious at all, but Robin watches his face grow paler and paler before Steve wraps the new bandages around his stomach.

Dustin, bless his precocious little heart, must also notice, because he quickly starts up a seemingly impromptu game of charades, meaning that Eddie is soon distracted by his ridiculously over the top gestures.

“No, Steve, how are you not getting this?”

“I thought the whole appeal of this game was that you’re not meant to talk, Henderson. Dude, watch it, you nearly took Max’s eye out with… whatever the hell that was.”

“Oh my god, it’s Back to the Future, obviously! Ow, Max, I didn’t mean to—uh, yeah, the mime needs to be that big, how else am I gonna project what—”

“Dustin, I swear to god, I’m about to project you out the window,” Steve drawls.

Eddie laughs, hides it behind his hand.

But Steve must catch it, because he glances over at Eddie and winks before he’s dragged back into guessing another movie title.

And Robin’s obviously seen Steve wink before—he does it all the time, so much so that she’s become quite adept at reading when it’s a friendly one for her, or if he’s sharing some kind of in-joke with one of the kids.

She’s also seen his attempts at a ‘smooth’ wink towards some girls at work—and look, he’s Steve Harrington, it’s not like he’s going to be bad at it.

But if you ask Robin, it’s never looked quite right, like he’s always performing to an audience he’s unsure of.

But this wink doesn’t look like it belongs to either of those categories. Well, it’s got something in common with the first: that it looks entirely natural, as if he’s doing it almost without thinking. Like it just feels right.

They go through some more rounds of charades—Dustin’s gestures, if possible, getting even more dramatic—and Eddie gradually goes from contributing a few guesses to none at all, curling up on the backseat. He looks utterly wiped out.

Robin tries to catch Nancy’s eye, and after a few attempts, she gets the message, stands up with a nod.

“Okay, let’s take this outside, guys.”

“Spoken like a true camp counsellor,” Max says.

Nancy acts like she’s offended, but her lips keep twitching into a smile. “Max, never say that to me again.”

“There’s more space outside,” Erica says, “so we can duck out the way of Dustin’s windmilling arms.”

“Hey!”

“I’m bored of charades,” Lucas says. “We could do another competition? Like, I dunno, cartwheels or handstands or something?”

“Oh sure, so I can show you up?” Max returns, grinning.

Steve scoffs. “Uh, if you’re doing a cartwheel competition, I would win.”

“Since when?” Dustin says, an obvious taunt that Steve predictably rises to, flipping him off.

“Save your athletics for Vecna, please,” Nancy cuts in dryly.

“It wouldn’t be a fair fight.” Lucas gestures to Steve’s stomach, a little uncertainly. “You know, considering…”

Steve rolls his eyes. “Whatever. Under normal circumstances, I would kick all your asses.”

“Sure,” Robin says brightly, “but Steve, if you do literally anything more strenuous than sitting down right now, I’m gonna—”

“Uh, Steve would kick your asses, actually,” Eddie says slowly. His voice is muffled from the way his hand’s holding up his chin, partly covering his mouth. “He did gymnastics.”

Robin, surprised, looks to Steve; he’s doing that thing where he scratches at his cheek unconsciously, seems to be a mixture of embarrassed and pleased.

“How’d you know that?” he asks.

Eddie shrugs. “We didn’t have a cover for gym one time, remember? There was a whole group of us slacking off but you just kept doing, y’know,” he twirls his fingers, “tricks on that box thingy.”

“Vaulting box,” Steve corrects like he can’t stop himself. He’s sporting an almost abashed little smile that Robin’s never seen before.

Eddie shrugs again. “S’all Greek to me,” he says, interrupts himself halfway through with a deep yawn.

Steve’s eyes soften. And then he’s ushering the kids outside, “C’mon, you can do whatever competition you want for thirty minutes before we get to work.”

“Got it, coach.”

“Shut up, Mayfield.”

“I’ll be your stopwatch if you’re doing handstands,” Nancy chips in, bringing up the rear—she catches Robin’s eye again, subtly tilts her head in Eddie’s direction and mouths Stay?

Robin nods.

“Uh, that won’t be accurate at all,” comes Dustin’s rebuttal—he’s outside now, but his voice still carries. “Unless you can like accurately keep time in your head down to the second—”

“Oh my god, Dustin, you’re such a shithead.”

“Nancy Wheeler, I’m heartbroken.”

Steve’s chuckle floats through the open door. “She said it, dude, not me.”

“You say it all the goddamn time!”

And then the voices fade away until all Robin can hear is distant laughs and joyful screams. It’s relaxing, in its own way.

“No gymnastics for you, Buckley?” Eddie says.

“Nope, not since 7th grade. Managed two cartwheels before I broke my wrist.”

Eddie winces in sympathy. He’s slumping a bit more; Robin makes herself comfy in the opposite corner of the backseat, gives him the most space.

She feels a weird lump at her back, behind one of the cushions. A quick investigation reveals an issue of TV Guide Magazine.

“Ooh, we can find out what we missed while on the run,” she says, waggling it in front of Eddie.

He smiles with a small huff. “Doubt it. Says 1981 on the front.”

“What’s a little more time travel?”

Robin flicks through to the crossword. She’s all too aware that Eddie’s still sat more stiffly than anything else. With Steve, it would be so easy; she could prod him in the thigh with her toe, light touches until he took the hint and relaxed.

But even before they’d really become friends, they were tactile: a tap on the shoulder to grab attention, bumping hips to move each other out of the way whenever they were scooping ice-cream at the same time. It’d been done so unconsciously, like they were already learning to read each other’s minds.

With Eddie, it’s clear that a different approach is needed.

Robin had caught onto that after her misstep at the boathouse, a pit in her stomach at the sight of Eddie’s hands shaking.

But her instinct to reach out, to soothe, made her unthinkingly try again; as they walked in the woods, she’d heard his breathing quicken, and her hand lightly brushed his back. She drew back as he instantly flinched at her touch.

“Sorry, sorry,” she said hurriedly. “Just—just checking you were okay. Sorry.”

Eddie just stared at her before nodding hesitantly.

And Robin wanted to tell him that it wasn’t by chance, that he had people who cared about him; that she did, and it wasn’t a fluke or an accident—she was choosing it.

She keeps her eyes on the magazine, jots down a few crossword answers. It reminds her of summer days spent reading on her grandparents’ porch, not wanting to startle a cat her grandpa had rescued as it approached her. It was always so spooked.

“You’ve just gotta let him come to you, sweet pea,” her grandma would say.

After a couple minutes, she hears Eddie breathe out, the creak of the seat as he lies down. He rests his head right next to her thigh.

“S’good?” he asks, pointing at the magazine.

“It’s pretty easy.” One of the crossword clues is ‘The Lion, the Witch, and the?’ which isn’t exactly taxing. “I’m used to doing the cryptic ones.”

Eddie laughs. He kinda sounds fond. “Of course you are.”

“They’re not that hard, once you know how to read ‘em.”

“Hmm, I doubt that. Lay one on me, Buckley.”

She purses her lips in thought. “Oh, I got this one last week. Condition of Wyoming, five letters.”

Eddie lifts his head ever so slightly to give her a blank look. “Not a fucking clue.”

“State. Get it? ‘Cause ‘condition’ is the definition, and Wyoming is literally—”

“God, I’m surrounded by geniuses.”

“Well, I’ve got the advantage of a summer of code-breaking.”

Robin slowly raises her hand as she speaks—makes sure to do it in Eddie’s line of vision, spots that he doesn’t pull back, that he even gives the tiniest half-nod. She pats his head twice.

Eddie scrunches up his nose. “Sorry, my hair’s gross.”

“It’s not that bad,” Robin says honestly. “Y’know for being on the run, it’s holding up pretty well. I’m getting whatever shampoo you use.”

Eddie smiles. “Sure.”

“Yours is looking way better than mine did after, like, one day getting wrapped up in all this.” Again, without really thinking, Robin adds, “I had all this sweat and blood and puke in it.”

Eddie’s eyes are closed now. He makes an unhappy sound, prods gently at her knee. “You’ve all gotta work on telling me horrific shit. That should not be casual for you, Buckley.”

He sounds emphatic—protective, even. Robin feels unexpectedly emotional.

“Yeah, sorry. Bad habit.”

Silence falls, and by the time Steve enters the RV, Robin has filled in the whole crossword, Eddie dozing by her side.

Steve’s getting another bottle of water—actually drinking it this time. He’s got grass stains on his knees, and he’s sweating slightly, like the ‘stay still’ advice hasn’t once been taken.

His eyes soften again when he sees Eddie sleeping—he doesn’t need to linger, but he does.

Robin watches.

We need more time, Steve, she thinks suddenly. For you to keep looking at him like that—for him to be awake to see it.

Steve tears his eyes away. Lands on her.

She smiles, mouthing What?

Steve rolls his eyes. He imitates her ‘what?’ mockingly, but then he smiles back and taps at his wrist, mimes winding a watch on. It’s what they do whenever they’re slammed at work, wanting to talk, but only able to briefly catch each other’s eyes in the rush. Later.

She taps her wrist. Later, she promises.

He gives her a double thumbs up—what a dork—before heading back outside.

Robin quietly puts the magazine away. Ever so carefully, she lightly strokes Eddie’s hair, feels her heart swell and break at the same time when he sighs contentedly in his sleep.

You’d better look after yourself, Eddie Munson, she thinks. You’ve got people here. People who really want you to stick around.

[loveshotzz]

My name’s Elvira, but you can call me tonight

steve harrington x eddie’sbestfriend!reader

Melt With You

summary: A cancelled movie night, Steve’s first high, and a realization you weren’t expecting.

wc: 2.7k

warnings: my blog is 18+ but this will be pretty safe for work. takes place in 1988 when Elvira Mistress of the Dark came out. post season four but no mention of the upside down, fem!reader, mentions of weed smoking, mentions of being stoned and being high for the first time, mutual pining, cuddling.

A/N: first I want to dedicate this to @bewilderedbunny for pointing out that Steve Harrington is Bob coded which made me fall even more in love with him. You can also thank @dr-aculaaa for putting this brain worm in my head where it spiraled and then she entertained it again and it spiraled some more. p.s. I know her movie macabre was cancelled in 86 but brought back in the 90’s but let’s pretend.

mini series masterlist -> chapter two 🎃

Steve was close. Too close.

His thigh is warm pressed against yours, long legs spread wide taking up most of the room on the couch. The cedar that clings to the threads of his maroon sweater mix with the old spice that he’s almost sprayed too much of, and you’re surprised at how much you actually like it. You blame it on the joint you both shared, and you do it again when his socked foot touches yours from under the blanket draped across your laps and your heart rate kicks up a few beats. This was just Steve, your new friend. Eddie’s new unlikely friend.

The living room in your apartment is dimly lit in a mess of Halloween colored string lights strung up along your walls that Eddie helped you hang up last week on the first official day of fall. They fill the small space in bursts of warm orange pumpkins and tiny purple bats while Elvira Mistress of The Dark glows from the screen of your TV in front of your couch. The couch where Steve is still sitting too close. 

The flicker of your candles dances across your walls and you’re tempted to blow them all out when they keep catching the corner of your eye. Maybe that's why you can't focus on the movie you were so excited about. The movie you raised a big fuss over when the group canceled your weekly night in favor of dates and work. The movie Steve still offered to watch with you saying he had no plans anyway. You really contemplate it when you realize it’s filling your living room with the kind of smell that’s eerily similar to the one embedded in the leather of the BMW you recently started getting more rides in.

When Steve laughs you can smell the berry on his breath from the Red Vines he can’t stop eating, his fingertips glisten from the half finished tub of popcorn on the coffee table. His arm brushes the length of yours when he leans forward to toss the almost empty pack of candy with the rest of the snacks and your stare immediately finds the sliver of tan skin revealed to you when the maroon hem rides up. Stomach flipping when you spot more freckles than the ones that seem to dot the endless expanses of his perpetually sun kissed skin. 

“Wow, she’s funny!” He snickers like he just got a good surprise, leaning back into the cushions. “I didn’t know she was so funny.”

The shift in his weight makes the couch dip, bringing you closer to him. Shoulder to shoulder, thigh to thigh. Why is your chest tight?

Turning your head, you meet his blood shot, heavy lidded gaze and lazy smile that pushes up his pink cheeks. You don’t think you’ve ever seen Steve Harrington so content. So relaxed. It might have something to do with the fact that the joint you both shared was his first.

“Beauty, humor and brains? How could you go wrong?” You grin and it makes the amber in his eyes light up.

“Yeah,” He stares at you for a second longer than he’d have the guts to on a normal day before adding with a sigh “tell me about it.”

There was something different about the way he was looking at you tonight, and it makes your palms sweat. The fly away honey strands that stick out wildly by his ears look softer than normal too. Why do you want to find out? Clearing your throat, he raises his eyebrows up at you in an unphased offering of his attention.

“How are you doing big boy? You coughed quite a bit earlier.” His gaze narrows at the nickname letting you know that Steve was still very much in there.

“I think it’s perfectly normal for someone who hasn’t smoked before to cough when they take an accidental big hit,” he challenges, his sock covered toes finding yours again seemingly on their own, “and to answer your rudely asked question, I’m having a very nice time.”

He tries to keep his face straight but the smile that stretches a mile wide across yours makes him snort, the whites of his perfect teeth blinding in the dark when you wiggle your feet with his. 

“Good, I wouldn’t want Robin to come hunt me down or something.” You giggle leaning back letting your own high relax you into the couch.

Your eyes find Elvira’s generous cleavage on the screen as you try to ignore the feeling of Steve’s hand touching yours when he scratches his thigh and again when he leaves it there. 

“Robin won’t care, it’s Nance you gotta worry about. Worry wart Wheeler.” The nickname rolls off his tongue too easily and makes you both stop, letting the sounds of the towns committee trying to get Elvira out fill the silence before you both fall into a fit of laughter.

It was the kind of laughter that left hot tears streaming down your faces as you leaned even further into each other trying to catch your breath, only for one of you to mutter ‘worry wart wheeler’ when the other would finally be holding it together just to start all over again. By the time it was done, and the last few chuckles subsided, his head had found a new home on your shoulder with his forehead buried in the crook of your neck. 

The smell of his hairspray, and the soft flyaways you’d wondered about tickle your nose with his hair pressed to your cheek. Your socked feet stay tangled together as you try not to think about the size difference and that stupid saying you’d heard in middle school, and you definitely try not to think about how the tip of his pinky bumps into the side of your hand and how you don’t hesitate to hook it with yours.

Cozy. Too Cozy.

There’s a comfortable silence that falls between you both when your attention is finally brought back to the movie and you wonder if he’s having the same existential crisis as you at how good this feels. Eddie would never let you live it down. You and the hair?! Steve’s amused hum breaks you out of your train of thought and you already know you’ll have to watch this again when you aren’t so…distracted. 

Elvira and Bob are fighting with a monster she accidentally concocted inside of a pot instead of the casserole she was trying to make, and his finger tightens around yours when Bob almost loses the fight before he shakes against you with a chuckle. The longer the movie goes on, the more you start noticing Steve’s similarities to the hunk who stole the Mistress of the Dark’s affections, mumbling an ‘oh my god’.

God dammit, you have a crush on Steve Harrington.

The weed makes the realization floor you more than it probably would on a normal day, because you aren’t blind, anyone could tell you how handsome the former king of Hawkins is. But no one could have warned you about how soft he is, especially right now with sleepy eyes and messy hair that smells like pine and too much hair product. They wouldn’t be able to tell you how big of a dweeb he is, or as Robin affectionately calls him a ‘dingus’. They also don’t know how good of a friend he is to anyone who’s lucky to have him, like refusing to let you spend the night alone and watching a movie he knew you were excited about just because he’d actually listened when you talked about it for weeks, even saving you the first copy in Keith’s possession. 

Too bad you’ve barely retained any of it. 

As if he could hear your thoughts, you feel the slight turn of his head and the heavy weight of his stare on the side of your face. You try not to give yourself away and keep your gaze locked on the TV where the town has Elvira ready to be burned at the stake, and Bob has to rescue her. You have to resist the urge to roll your eyes, the universe just rubbing it in now. 

The side of your body he’s been leaning against starts to go numb, and no matter how much you want to stay exactly like this for whatever is left of the night, the need for circulation becomes too much. Your eyes flick down to his that haven’t haven’t wavered and that slow happy smile spreads across his pink lips when they meet. 

“You doing okay, honey.” The nickname he’s called you sarcastically in arguments sounds different when it’s wrapped in affection like this. 

“Not that I’m not enjoying -,” nerves make your throat close up and you have to clear them out before you finish, “not that I’m not enjoying this. My arm is just kind of going numb.”

Heat rises to your cheeks with embarrassment that you know is misplaced, and his eyes go wide when your words click. His reaction is fast despite the smoked joint that's snuffed out in an empty coke can on the table when he pulls away. The warmth of his body that’s invaded what feels like every inch of yours for the last hour is gone and the tightness in your chest worsens now that you miss it. Stupid crush. Stupid blood flow. 

“Oh my god, sorry, sorry, I was just so comfortable I wasn’t even thinking.” There’s stress in his tone that you haven’t heard all night and you decide that you hate it, he’s always stressed.

“Hey,” Your fingers curl around his bicep, and it flexes under the thick material of his sweater when his eyes meet yours, making you forget how to speak for a moment, “if we lay down on our sides we’ll - we’ll be more comfortable?” 

Your heart beats loud in your ears after you throw out your suggestion fully knowing there’s gotta be less than twenty minutes left of the movie at most. 

“Yeah, we can do that, like, big spoon?” He points to himself, with eyes as red as his cheeks before pointing to you with a small grin, “little spoon?”

You bite your bottom lip to contain the smile that threatens to break across your face, and it only makes his grow. 

“Yeah, just like that Harrington.” You giggle and you don’t miss the kind of glint in his eyes that sparkles because of it.

“Harrington? I thought I was big boy?” He mocks with fake offense, clumsily clambering back onto the couch letting himself fully extend.

His socked feet almost hang off the armrest but the problem is quickly solved when he turns onto his side leaving just enough room for you. One of his big hands patting the cushions in an invitation that makes you both laugh. 

“I thought you hated that nickname?” you tease, butterflies that never existed before erupting when he watches you with soft eyes climb into the spot next to him.

Your head lands in the crook of his elbow, amber and spice enveloping you while one of his long fingers curl around your hip not hesitating to pull you flush against his chest like he missed you. Maybe you weren’t the only one with a wandering mind tonight. 

“I don’t,” he agrees, lips coming up right next to your ear and you wonder if he can feel the shiver that runs down your spine, “but I kinda like it when you say it.”

Your body curls into him when you giggle with a throb in your core that makes your thighs press together. Steve chuckles, hooking his chin over your shoulder and his feet find yours at the end of the couch like they did under the blanket. Grabbing the throw off the floor, you drape it back over the two of you when you both finally get situated. 

He feels like he’s everywhere and it’s even harder to concentrate like this, especially when all his fingers are laced with yours now. The pad of his thumb rubs circles on the top of your hand, and you can feel the way his cheeks push up into a grin every time something makes him laugh. You spend the last bit of what’s left of the movie tangled up with him like this, and neither one of you try to move when the credits roll or when the screen goes black. 

The air buzzes with the kind of tension that’s laid dormant until there’s nothing to distract you from it anymore in the new silence. His breath fans hot across your neck while the strokes of his thumb get slower, adding a little more pressure to the muscle there, and feels good enough to have your eyes flutter closed. 

Maybe it’s the darkness of your living room, or the way the tip of his nose starts to trace the shell of your ear but you get the surge of confidence you need to turn around and face him. Steve doesn’t protest at all, letting you move with the kind of ease that makes you wonder if he was waiting for it all along. The small smile on his face tells you he absolutely was.

The new angle has you looking up at him from under your lashes, while his hand that held yours all night covers the middle of your back bringing you to his chest, getting you just as close as before. Your legs slot together while warm lights flicker across his face, they bounce and reflect off the lingering glaze that coats his eyes. Embers burning in a mossy ground. 

It starts to feel like Steve Harrington wants to kiss you, and you’d be lying if your said you didn’t want him too.

“Hi” You whisper, the corners of your lips pulling up because they can’t help it when he looks at you like this.

“Hi” the rich honey of his voice comes out low as he dips his head down to rest on his forearm right above yours.

The tips of your noses are dangerously close to touching, and you swear you hear his breath hitch when your feet find his again. Holding his gaze, you silently dare him to read your mind so you don’t have to say it out loud. You do it first.

“I had a lot of fun tonight.” You try not to think about how it sounds like something you’d say at the end of a date.

“Me too, I’m uh -“ a puff of hot air fans across your face when he laughs, and you notice his first sign of nerves all night, “I’m glad I didn’t make a fool of myself or anything.” 

“I have to say I’m impressed, you handled your first joint like a pro.” Your hands dare to run up his chest, plucking a piece of lint from the threads of his sweater. You feel the way the muscles in his stomach flex for you, and you have to bite back your smirk.

“I had good company is all.” He hums, the blunt ends of his nails scratching along the dip of your back, before whispering “Is this okay?”

Your eyes flutter shut with contentment you haven’t felt in a while, your whole body melting into his with a mumbled ‘mmmhm’

“Does Elvira have any other movies we could watch sometime?” His question makes your eyes pop open, and he tries to look as nonchalant as possible before adding, “you know just me and you.”

“Not a movie, per say but she has a show I like to watch where she does funny commentary on B rated horror films.” Your two feet trap one of his between them playfully to try and ease the nerves he shouldn’t have, earning you that megawatt smile that’s made half the ladies in Hawkins swoon. 

So, Steve Harrington wasn’t a mind reader.

“That sounds like fun,” He lets out a relieved sigh that you didn’t know he was holding, close enough now for your noses to touch.

“Yeah? You wanna come have fun with me?” You tease, but it comes out sounding like a double entendre that makes your skin heat up, especially when Steve closes his eyes and groans. The nails that scratch your back freeze as he tries regaining some semblance of self control. Licking his lips, he exhales a breath out of his nose before he speaks,

“Abso-“

His answer gets cut off by the sound of your front door slamming open, followed by the bellowing voice of the only other person who has keys to your apartment.

“I’ve come for boobies and I brought beer! Better late than never am I ri- Whoa, whoa, WHOA, what is going on here?” Eddie’s shock is quickly replaced by amusement, dimples poking deep holes in his cheeks when he grins wildly as he takes in the two of you on the couch.

What was going on here?

[tteokdoroki]

*ੈ🌩️‧₊˚— happy home day + eijirou kirishima.

૮˶ᵕ ༝ᵕ˶ა synopsis — exactly one a year after adopting from the pound, kirishima plans a special surprise for you, his special little puppy hybrid, on their birthday.

⭑ warnings — please read + mdni ! characters aged up, smut, fluff, hybrids, lingerie, collars, creampies, dumbification, possessiveness, pet-names, body-worship, orgasm-denial, dom-sub, unprotected sex, praise!kink, daddy!kink, breeding!kink, afab!reader, puppy hybrid!reader, pro hero + owner!kirishima.

⭑ words — 4.3K.

⭑ notes — hi !!! i wanted to post something so had you guys vote on what you wanted to see next. the winner ended up being kirishima <3! this was a birthday fic commissioned by my baby @eijirhoe ( who has given me permission to post ) and was beta read by the lovely @vagabondings!! i hope you enjoy !! kiss kiss - m.list ✩

“for fucks sake, kirishima, that is not a fuckin’ guard dog.” 

only katsuki bakugou could be this miserable in an adoption centre for adorable hybrids— kittens, bunnies, mice and puppies alike. the redhead gives the employee standing nearby an apologetic mix between a smile and a grimace, the poor thing shaking in their boots at the proximity of the dynamight.

“katsuki, don’t yell. you’ll scare the ‘lil thing,” he pouts, sticking his fingers through the wire bars on the cage— coaxing the little hybrid inside closer. “and i thought you said german shepherds made great guards!” kirishima wiggles his digits again, pursing his lips to make those kissy sounds that are usually used to call to cats and crouches down to the height of the enclosure. 

bakugou smacks him upside the head but takes a stance beside his rioting hero friend before signing dejectedly. “wrong sound idiot, you’re meant to whistle,” the two strong, and surely intimidating men spare a glance at the cowering hybrid as katsuki whistles in an attempt to gain some trust. “and they usually do, but this one looks like they might shit themselves if someone looks at them funny. not a guard dog.”  

“but bakugou—“ 

“i hate to interrupt, mister riot. mister dynamight.” the employee from earlier steps in, steeling her nerves as she gestures to the cage the puppy hybrid is in. “but if this one doesn’t get adopted soon, i’m afraid they’re going to be put down. we don’t have the space for slightly quieter and apprehensive hybrids like them, no one really wants them if they’re not overly friendly or energetic and…if they do it’s usually for the like…” 

“hybrid farms,” bakugou finishes for the kid, his voice thick with disgust. “just shut one of those down the other day. awful fuckin’ places.” 

kirishima pouts again, peering into your cage— noting the gloss in your big pretty eyes and how you shrink in on yourself, tail pinned to the ground without the happy swish to it that other puppy hybrids in the centre have. “so…” he can’t imagine what you’ve been through, what you’ve seen to have ended up here. “if they don’t get adopted today, they’ll be put down? isn’t there any other way? that hardly seems fair.”

“to us it’s a little more humane than ending up at a hybrid farm or those indecent love hotels exclusively for sex with hybrids…” the employee trails off again, nervously fidgeting with their fingers. in the distance, a bell chimes with the notification of more customers— a mother and her child, probably looking to adopt one of the younger, nosier hybrids for their family. “if you’ll excuse me…” 

“i’ll take ‘em!” red riot blurts without even thinking, the employee not having taken two steps away from him and his angry blonde friend who looks at him like he’s gone bat-shit crazy. “this is their only chance, right? i have to do something, they don’t deserve to go out like this.” the blonde closes his mouth, holding his protests thoughtfully. 

he’s right. kirishima is right, his kind soul always is. “ai’ght, fine. but don’t expect me to train that thing, they ain’t nowhere near close t’bein’ a guard dog.” bakugou grunts, folding his arms across his broad chest with a faux look of dismay— not admitting how impressed he is with eijirou. 

eijirou kirishima has a heart of gold, he’s always been like that— putting others before himself because he believes in them. he takes in strays, builds up their strength and their confidence, letting them know that he’ll always be the sturdy figure they can fall back on in times of need. katsuki was one of those strays, an unwanted dog just like you. he’d bared his fangs to the sweet redhead in fear of letting in someone that would hurt him, but as it turns out, becoming friends with someone as selfless as kirishima was just what katsuki needed.

the employee sighs, shoulders sagging with relief as they glance between the two pro heroes. “should i be getting the adoption papers then?”

with an enthusiastic nod, red riot peers back at you with affectionate eyes and a smile you can trust— one that only widens when you bump your head against his fingers over the bars of your pen and let the tips of them just brush your lush puppy dog ears. “yes please,” he says warmly, his gaze never leaving you. “don’t you worry about a thing little one, it’s you and me now, got it?” 

and for the first time in forever, your tail wags happily, and you don’t feel worried at all.

being adopted by eijirou kirishima most probably saved your life. 

he’d been eager to get you out of that shelter, with the promise of a better life written against his lips and lost under his tongue as he babbled about your new home and how excited he was to have a puppy hybrid of his own. a timid, sweet faced and jumpy german-shepherd hybrid nothing like their breed— with big eyes, a set of pointed and twitchy puppy dog ears and a tail that stays pinned to the ground with nervousness. there’s a lot for him to undo, a lot of trust to build up.

kirishima was patient when introducing you to his home that only big time pro hero money could buy— he let you sniff out the place, scenting areas that made you feel safe even having his comforting, large presence right beside you was enough to make your ears perk up and heightened senses go wild. he let you pick out the biggest spare room in the house and had even felt sad for you when you stated that you’d never had your own before. 

“with me, i’ll make sure you have everything you want ‘n more, kay pup? things will never go back to the way they were for you.” the red head swore to you, crossing his heart — that was the first time you’d ever felt love like that. 

the two of you quickly fall into an easy routine; kirishima would leave for work in the mornings after making sure he’d set out the perfect meal a growing pup, like you, would need— using all sorts of kibble that his explosive friend katsuki had recommended. occasionally he’d spoil you with pieces of turkey bacon that he knew you weren’t allowed to have, but what was the harm in spoiling someone who hadn’t experienced luxury before? plus he liked the way your German shepherd tail would wag and your pupils would dilate at the sight of the meaty meal. 

eijirou made sure you had all the toys possible to play with while he was away for work— you didn’t like sitters and nearly chewed out the last one katsuki had recommended for a nervous puppy such as yourself. you didn’t like her scent and how it had gotten all over your owner. you preferred to be alone, surrounded by the pinewood and musky husk the redhead would leave behind. and, by the time he came home from being red riot, you’d be sitting right by the door with big bambi eyes to welcome him home, the little bell on your store-bought collar jingling as you rush to meet kirishima at eight pm sharp each day.

though you’re pampered with treats and pretty things and ear scratches 24/7– kirishima does have you trained by that awful bakugou. you’re by no means a guard dog, despite what your hybrid breed might indicate— but you’re disciplined with house rules and how to sit and act properly. bakugou is mean and he snarls at you from time to time, but the praise and kisses you get from your darling and sweet red haired owner make the training completely worth it. 

nowadays, katsuki doesn’t even question when you scamper onto the couch or perch yourself on eijirou’s lap whenever they have their boys nights to watch the hero rankings live. “pampered fuckin’ pooch,” is all he grunts from over his can of beer. 

“hey,” eijirou will huff, his hands on the fat of your waist or twirling through your fluffy brown and black tail. “don’t be mean, katsuki. they don’t know any better.” 

even with all that house training— you still sneak into his bed when being on your own gets too much. his warmth calms you, and eijirou doesn’t seem to mind the brush of your thick and soft tail against his thighs in the morning. “pup, you’re not s’pposed to be on the bed,” he’d tried to scold you the first time it happened, he really did, but your ears lay flat against your skull and you gave him those eyes and kirishima was quick to dive in next to you— asking you what was wrong. “nightmares huh? of the pound? well, those can’t be very nice. maybe you should share a bed with me tonight. one night won’t hurt, will it?” 

except one night, becomes every single night.

repeatedly, each night, eijirou scoops you up into his flexing, toned arms and carries you to his room instead of your own— tucks you under his weighted duvets not yours, and swamps you with his body heat. he runs like a furnace during the later hours, not that you mind, it’s nice to be close to him. to feel adored like that.

yourself and kirishima are touchier than most hybrid-owner pairs, you’ve noticed. bakugou thinks it’s because you have a clingy-attachment style, the red head because you’ve been deprived of the affection that most pups deserve. he goes beyond headpats and chin scratches, and the ones that itch right behind your floppy fluffy ears. kirishima keeps a hand on the slope of your waist when he takes you for walks on sunny days, he holds your hand instead of your leash most of the time and his lips linger against your forehead a little longer than normal for a hybrid that’s just a housepet. 

you think it’s normal at least, you’ve never been cared for like this and having eijirou’s attention some, if not all, of the time feels like a dream come true. you know that he loves you when actions of endearment become more passionate— when innocent cheek kisses become sloppier lip-locks and when hugs turn into desperate attempts to grab at your flesh, also when your heat cycles become less about finding a mate and more about begging kirishima to ravage  you against the nearest surface, soothing the instinctual ache in your bones and lower tummy. 

he loved you, and you loved him— and you knew that you owed it all to kirishima for the better life he gave you. taking a chance on a shy little puppy hybrid at risk of being put down.

taking a chance on you.

“angel, ‘m home!”

the rustling of brown paper bags, heavy foot-steps and keys jingling in the front door make your puppy dog ears twitch and you perk up from your place deeper in the house at the sound of kirishima coming home from a long day’s work. you scramble up to meet him half-way into the kitchen, tail swishing a mile a minute behind you, nose wriggling in anticipation. “e-eji!” you breathe, fingers itching to reach out and touch him. “you’re back!”

you’re so cute, so loyal that it warms the pro hero right down to his core. kirishima nods once, giving you the go ahead to latch onto him since you’d waited so patiently and lets out a small chuckle as you tuck yourself into his side. “i always come back, don’t i?” setting the bags on the marble island, he frees up a hand to brush over your head softly, using a knuckle to rub behind your ear. “have you been good, baby?” moving to cup your cheeks next, he presses a gentle smooch to the tip of your nose. “‘course you have, you’re always good f’me…but, i gotta know— did ya miss me?”

“i always miss you,” you say a little too quickly, nuzzling into the palm of red riot’s large hand, tail wagging even faster. “can i…can i have a kiss, eiji? please.”

for a moment, a primal look flashes through the hero’s eyes before being replaced with something softer, something that mirrors the smile he gives you. “only ‘cause you asked so nicely, baby,” he says playfully, sliding his hands from your face down to your waist and tugging you nice and close, your hips flush against one another. “c’mere puppy, gimme some sugar, hm?” your body can’t help but bristle, keening into kirishima’s touch as he subtly lowers his voice and guides you into following his command.

you stand on your tiptoes without even realising it, tilting your head upwards as kirishima coaxes your mouth open with his mellow moving tongue—sighing sweetly against your lips until he’s captured them properly in a slow kiss, not giving you too much but pouring enough words into it to let you know how much he cares for you. he pulls away so things don’t too heated, but still keeps his hands on you before you can whine in protest. 

“what’s that?” you ask softly, cocking your head to the side when you notice the bags behind him.

“oh those? well,” kirishima swoops down to your height, nipping your nose with pointed teeth— only serving to make it scrunch up adorably. “i heard it was a certain pup’s birthday today…and it also happens to be the one year anniversary of their adoption. so i got ‘em a lil’ somethin’ to celebrate.”

he lives for the way you smile, almost dies at how your eyes sparkle. “c-can i open it eji?”

“not all of it, pumpkin,” eijirou briefly lets you go and you really do whimper this time, knowing better than to claw at him to stay when you know he’ll be right back. the burly redhead turns to grab a perfectly wrapped package from within the brown paper bag and passes it to you with an eager grin. “go put this on f’me, will you baby? then meet me in the living room once you’re done, for the rest of your present, kay?”

“okay! i’ll be quick!” you practically squeal, vibrating in your place.

“good pup, i’ll be waitin’,” he turns you around with a grip that's barely there, handling you as if you’ll break with too much force and patting you on the bum softly as you go. 

by the time you return to the living room, it’s been completely transformed. 

the lighting is dimmed, a ruby glow filtering through and the soft hum of your favourite song reverberates against the walls and high ceilings. kirishima seems to be fixing a box on the coffee table by the couch before he notices you, a slick and sexy grin tugging at the corners of his lips as you approach him. “there’s my pretty puppy,” he rasps lowly, sending a shiver from the tips of your ears right down to your toes. “god, i think i made the right choice pickin’ that cute lil’ number out for ya, looks so good on you, hun.”

heat pulses under your skin like buzzing kinetic energy, making you tuck the swell of your cheek into your shoulder bashfully, fluffy ears flattening against your skull. “you think so?” said number is a darling little babydoll dress, made of black silk and red lace lace accents that tickle the backs of your thighs with hearts embroidered at the chest.

“it looks perfect on you baby, you’re breathtakin’,” kirishima tells you earnestly, holding his hand out for you to hold— which you take shyly. “c’mere, twirl f’me? wanna see all of you. show off for me, cutie.” every single one of his compliments has your tail swaying from side to side and blood rushing to your brain, making you dizzier than the cute little spins you do for him while the pro hero sinks into the couch to watch you.

he leans back, thighs spreading wide— and you have to fight the urge to drop your gaze between them. “that’s it pretty thing, my puppy’s such a fuckin’ stunner.” kirishima swallows thickly, ruby glossed eyes darkening with desire. “come t’daddy pup, wanna give you your other gift.” 

you quickly shift to stand between his spread legs, quivering like you’re cold has large and rough hands swallow your waist and bunch your night dress up at your hips. he presses sloppy kisses to the softness of your tummy over the material. 

“sit.” he commands simply, tugging on your hips to pull you down with him

“yes daddy,” your breathing is ragged as you sink into kirishima’s lap, thighs apart so that you can straddle him properly.  you wonder if he can hear your heart racing from its place in your chest— your heightened hybrid senses can already pick up on his, kirishima’s pulse sky-rocketing now that you’re on top of him. “c-can i have my gift now?”

his calloused hand pushes the black silk up and over the curve of your ass, red riot digging into the fat of it to rock you back and forth over is hardening girth. “r’member your manners, puppy. yer s’pposed to ask daddy nicely.” nonetheless, he relents and snatches up the box on the coffee table— handing it to you to unravel. “open it up, baby.”

excitedly, you tear through the daintily wrapped package, revealing a red patent leather collar—decorated with red and black bows, and a heart shaped tag with the letters ‘EK’ inscribed into it. collaring was a big deal in the hybrid community, it meant a permanent mark, belonging to someone, being in love.

“let me put it on you,” eijirou simpers, readily slipping the leather around your neck and sliding two fingers underneath it to tug your lips up to his. “i love you, pup.” he confesses, licking into your mouth hungrily and grinding up into your dripping heat.

it’s embarrassing how wet you’ve gotten and so fast, dumbly following him to the forest fire of lust, sucking on his tongue like a parched puppy lapping at the first drink it can get. hybrids slick up faster when aroused and kirishima turns you on like no other— somehow finding your panty covered clit between your salacious bump and grind. 

slumping against his beefy chest, your nails dig deep into his shoulders and whistle tone dog squeaks bubble up on the swell of your lips each time eijirou swipes the pad of his thumb over your swelling pleasures nub, encouraging your juices to gush over his hard on—glueing you both together by strings your arousal.

“i love you too…p-please e-eiji!” the air in the room feels heavier, tainted with the lust that clouds your logical thought. in fact, you can’t even think right with the way your owner toys with you.  he drools against your puppy tongue, curses into your heated mouth all while you’re riding his fingers like your life depends on it, kirishima pinching at your sticky clit just to hear more of your needy whines. “p-please daddy,”

the hand that once sat lightly against your neck now trails over each dip and curve of your body, barely brushing over your nipples or digging into the meat of your ass and thighs. “you look so fuckin’ good in the things i buy you, hun, drive me fuckin’ insane,” kirishima fights back a moan, cock twitching against your ass, desperate to be inside of you. “so beautiful in that lil’ dress, with my name around your neck. fuck… ‘m so lucky. my pup, daddy’s sexy fuckin’ puppy.” he rambles and praises you all at once, giving you whiplash, making you clench and ooze sweetly around nothing.

you’re sure that the redhead is almost as brainless and as fucked out as you are just from dry humping his darling little pup… but through his own grunts and groans, hips wildly bucking up to meet yours— kirishima still manages to dominate you, make you feel like you don’t even have to think around him. “you want me, pup, is that it? want me to fuck you?” he hums huskily against the shell of your ear, pinging your collar against your neck when you nod your head yes wordlessly. “gotta—fuck— gotta use your words f’daddy, c’mon now, you know that.”

“y-yes daddy, want you. badly.” you slur, and suddenly, your world tilts on its axis. your back hits the sofa with a bounce and you're pinned against it by the weight of your owner above you, your knees being pushed into your shoulders.

“a-always such a good…obedient lil thing f’me,” eijirou groans at the sight of you beneath him. “so perfect, ‘m so lucky t’have such a beautiful puppy all to myself, shit!” your silk baby doll gathers at your hips, soaked panties tucked to the side and your glistening, pulsing mound on display like an attraction made just for him. he wastes no time in yanking down his sweats and boxers in one go— revealing his bright red and angry dick, covered in a thick layer of gooey white precum. all for you. kirishima slaps the length of himself against your slit once, twice before his forehead falls against yours. 

“p-put it in eiji, c-can’t wait daddy…”

even though your cute little sex makes him a wreck, eijirou still manages to hold control over you— teasing you as he forces his fat tip past your tiny, creamy entrance. “so impatient, cutie, i should make you say please… but fuck, i need you so bad right now. might not last long…”

the pair of you let out strained moans as kirishima pushes in and he reaches the hilt—your sweaty bodies flush against one another, both of you covered in layers of each other’s arousal. your pussy flutters at being filled up so fast, clinging onto the pretty blue veins that spiral around his chubby, swollen cock— a low whine rumbles in your chest as the redhead sets a rough stream to his thrusts, milky cockhead brushing against each pulse point on your sensitive walls. 

it’s almost like you’re being knotted, squelching as kirishima tries to pull out of your snug sex that grips him selfishly. all the while, he pounds you to hell and back. you're so full, you’re a slobbering mess already teetering on the edge of insanity. red riot leans over you, washboard abs pressed against the backs of your thighs to force you down into the creaky couch— each time he withdraws from your messy and wet walls, your ears fall back and your tail thumps hard against the cushions, coated in your viscous nectar.

“fuck, this puppycunt sounds so dirty, gorgeous…feels like fuckin’ heaven,” he whispers to you, words damp on your cupid’s bow. “my perfect puppy, a dumb lil’doggy on my cock…s’such a fuckin’ dream.” your brain empties, becomes a void that’s filled with only eijirou kirishima and the way he fucks you deep, hits every spot, touches your body like a man worshipping a higher power. “‘m so lucky baby, really am.”

your collar jingles, the pendant with his name on it bouncing every time kirishima’s cock bullies its way into your gooey insides until they give into him. you’re the lucky one, you think— lucky to be loved like this, to have been rescued from the pound and pinned down on a dick that aches to be inside you, wrapping around his pulsing length to the point where you’re practically milking him already.

“d-daddy!” you hiccup, big fat tears clumping in your lashes, your face a beautiful mess to the man above you. “i can’t…”

the pro hero reaches down between your bodies, close to cumming just from listening to you howl over the sounds of skin slapping on skin, and tugs at your soft slick tail—stroking it until your pussy quivers and gushes around him, painting your babydoll dress and his half rolled down sweats with a fresh wave of your essence. every time he pets the fluffy appendage, you get wetter and wetter, tighter and tighter and your moans loud enough to wake the neighbours. 

heavy hips rock into you, even heavier balls clap creamily against your fleshy ass and kirishima lets his head drop to your neck—biting and sucking possessively at exposed skin just above where your collar lies. “yes you fuckin’ can, your daddy’s good pup right?” he slurs hungrily, writing his claim against your throat. “when you get close, hold it f’daddy, be obedient ‘n you’ll get your reward.”

you feel like everything’s on fire, every nerve ending in your body buzzing with anticipation— the knot in your stomach seconds away from unwinding. “b-but daddy—!”

“hold it.” eijirou warns sternly, though his breath stutters— every instinct that he has threatening to breed you up full with a load of his hot cum. “h-hold it, hon,” you sob at the pain and pleasure of holding off, thighs twitching, tail hitting the couch hard and puppy ears flopping over your face. you’re so adorable like this, jolting up the piece of furniture as the redhead languidly canters into you. he finally breaks when you let out a weak cry of his name, his first spurts of cum pouring into you. “f-fuck, let go for me puppy, make a mess on daddy’s cock—shit, thats it. so good, all over me, wanna see you cummin’ with me…”

white hot ropes of seed paint your insides just as your eyes roll back into your skull. he feels so warm, coating your insides with a layer of his cum as if to claim you from the inside out. there’s so much of it that oozes out of your entrance thickly, like a running tap of honey  that ruins your pussy lips with opaque white—triggering your own orgasm. kirishima holds you close, whispers sweet nothings into your ear as your release crashes over you, rocking your world while your juices splatter out against his pelvis and all over your cute little gown in clear streams.

“happy birthday, beautiful,” the redhead mumbles to you sweetly, kissing his initials on your pendant and right up to your lips. “i love you.”

“t-thank you eiji,” you whisper back— a sleepy, full and content puppy. “i love you too.”

[blizzardfluffykpop]

Under the Glow of Candlelight

Summary: At your usual best friend sleepovers, you started talking about your unsatisfying exes, one thing leads to another. And soon you’re on top of your best friend, under the glow of candle lights. 

Oneshot

Smut, PW?P, Fluff?, Best friends to *official* lovers

If you are a minor, please do not read/engage with this post. This is an 18+ work. 

Warnings: Unprotected Sex (pls practice safe sex), Soft dom! Juyeon, Cowgirl position, Body Worship, Marking (m! & f! receiving), Slight Possessiveness, Tit-sucking & fondling (f! receiving), Praise, One (1) ass smack (f! receiving), Creampie, Candles lit and glowing (no candle/temperature/wax play), Talking about previous partners & positions, Mentions of prev. talks about masturbation, *Aftercare*, Use of pet names: Princess, Baby, and Sweetheart *And if I missed any pls lmk!*

Word Count: 2,739

Juyeon X Fem!Reader 

Again, if you are a minor, please do not read/engage with this post. This is an 18+ work. 

------

Juyeon, above all, was your best friend, so telling him exactly how you liked to be fucked didn’t seem out of the blue. After all, the two of you had talked about how you masturbated before. Why would this be any different? “Yeah, remember my last boyfriend?” He hums, “Yeah, he was kind of boring.” You groan, sitting upside down and looking up at the ceiling, “And god, he was boring in bed too.” He lets out a soft laugh, as you tell him, finally looking over at him, “I just like it when someone’s rougher and can take me like they own me y’know?” He nods, “Yeah, rougher is more fun. But you? Of all people- Want someone to act like they own you?” You laugh, “It’s kind of funny when you put it that way. But I just want them to be in charge.” His mouth is ajar as he nods, “That makes more sense.” You hum, and he asks, “Then what’s your favorite position?” You grin, “Guess.” And you watch as he thinks before he answers, “I don’t know, cowgirl?” You gasp, “How’d you know?” He shrugs, “I’ve known you since we were little. You always like to look like you’re in charge… And well, with you saying you want someone to actually be in charge… It just made sense.” You laugh, “Well, what about you?” He shrugs, “I think you already know…” You gasp, “No way…” His smile turns into a smirk as he does, “You know I’m a sucker for being underneath. You get so much more access that way… I can control the pace and suck on some pretty tits? Princess, that’s the dream…” You laugh, “I can’t believe we like the same position for different reasons.” He tilts his head at you, “You can’t?” 

You shrug, finally flipping to be right-side up on his couch, “I don’t know, I always pictured you as an ass guy so-” He shakes his head as he shoves your shoulder, and you fall over teasingly before getting back up, “I am. But that’s why it’s one of the best positions. I get to have a handful of it as I take control.” You let out an ‘ahh’ as it makes sense to you. And you ask, “What was your last girlfriend like… What was her name? Jen? Jennet?” “You mean Jeanie?” You nod, and he groans, “Ugh, she only liked me to hit it from the back, and it had to be in total darkness… And as much as that’s nice… I love seeing someone come undone for me.” You tilt your head, “You like to fuck with the overhead lights on, or?” He shrugs, “At least candles…” You push his shoulder, “Ohh, so romantic.” He rolls his eyes, “What? A little romance is boring for you?” And you shrug, fiddling with your pajama shorts, “Never had the opportunity to fuck with them lit.” He shakes his head, “You don’t fuck with candles on-” “Don’t you dare-” “You make love with them lit.” You groan, “Ugh… you had to say that.” He looks at you confused, “Have you never made love either?” You shrug, “I guess I’ve come close to it?” He looks at you weirdly, “What do you mean you’ve come close? I thought you loved that one girl.” You sigh, “I did- but like- I don’t know? I don’t think I’ve ever genuinely had sex to make love. It’s always been with the goal of getting off- nothing else.” Juyeon shakes his head, “Now who’s the boring one, baby?” You roll your eyes, “I was shedding my heart to you, and here you are-” He cuts you off, “Well, have you ever wanted to?” You think back to all your exes, “Well, yeah, I guess? I don’t know, I never really thought about it...” 

He squints at you, “Really?” You shrug and ask him, “Well, have you ever made love?” He hums, running his hand through his hair, “Most of the time. You know I’m a bit slower, and it takes me some time to catch on, right?” You nod, and he continues, “I take my time figuring out what makes them tick and it’s just a lot more intimate feeling than fucking just to get off, you know?” You sigh, “I wish I did…” And he hums, “Well, what if you could?” You look over at him, “How so?” He shrugs, “We could.” You give him an odd look, “I don’t know if we should. It’s one thing to fuck your friends. But to make love with them?” He looks into your eyes as you continue, “Isn’t that drawing the line? Aren’t you supposed to only do that with people you love?” He shrugs, “I love you a lot, doesn’t that count?” You look at him, “I mean... I love you too, but I don’t know if we should make love. Because wouldn’t that make us more than we are?” He shrugs, “I don’t know, only one way to find out though… Of course, if you want to, it's on the table. If not, we can forget it and just continue talking about our unsatisfying exes.” You hum and think about it. On one hand, you could be ruining a friendship you’ve cherished for years. On the other hand, you could be starting a new forever with him. And you kind of like that thought. 

So, you shrug, “Why not?” He smiles as he goes, “Let’s go to my room.” You nod, and he leads you down the hall to his room. He opens the door, lets you in, and gestures for you to sit on his bed. “One second.” You get comfy laying there watching him find his lighter and arrange the candles in his room before lighting them one at a time. He puts the lighter down before turning off the overhead light, and the candles cast a soft amber glow over the room, “Woah…” He smiles, “Beautiful, right?” You hum in agreement and whisper as he walks towards you, “I don’t know how anyone would pass this up.” He shrugs, unsure as to why, either. As he crawls over you, he asks, “Can I kiss you?” You nod, and he leans over you and gives you a second to back away and back out before he kisses you. 

You sigh when he pulls away. It finally feels like the pieces are coming together. His hand slowly moves up your shirt, and you ask, “Are we really going to do this?” He looks into your eyes, “Not if you don’t want to.” You shake your head, “No, that’s not what I meant. I just- I love you, and I don’t know if that will change.” He kisses your forehead, “If it helps you any, it won’t make me love you any less.” You look into his eyes, “It does.” “Will you love me any less?” You shake your head, and he smiles, “Then the only thing that could change is?” You hum, wondering what he’s about to say, “We find we like having sex together, and we fall deeper for each other.” You shrug as you agree, “Yeah, I guess so.” He asks, “Will you love me any less if I don’t fuck you good?” You laugh, “Nah, I just won’t ever have sex with you again. Will you feel the same?” He smiles, “Yeah.” You nod, “Okay.” “Then it’s settled.” He pulls you in for another kiss, and you let yourself fully enjoy it. 

He pushes your shirt to the side to leave kisses along your collarbone before slowly dragging your shirt up and over your head. He smiles as he takes a moment to appreciate your chest. You blush before he sinks down and drags slow kisses along your chest, worshiping your body like it was a temple. He sucks on one of your nipples as he wraps his hand around the other, gently kneading before pulling back to suck on the other. You let out soft moans as he continues playing with your breasts. After a couple of minutes, he finally pulls away to capture your lips in his, slowly making out with you. When he pulls away this time, he gives you a quick peck before trailing his kisses down your torso. 

He lets out soft hums of appreciation as he kisses along your stomach, finally reaching the top of your pajama bottoms. He moves up, peeling them off before dragging your panties down. He lets out a content hum as he looks you fully over. “You look good like this, princess…” He gets up from the bed and takes off his clothes slowly, and you drink it in. Maybe you shouldn’t be doing this with your best friend. But it felt so right. You smile as he sits down beside you. He gently grabs your sides, lifting you up before placing you on his lap. He smiles as he tells you, “Hmm, yeah, you look like you belong here.” You blush as you look at his eyes and see them filled with adoration. It made you feel a sense of pride as you smiled, “I think I’ll look better with you in me.” He chuckles, “We’ll at least feel better.” You laugh as he lines you up, and you slowly sink down onto his cock. 

You both let out a breath when you fully sink down, making you both laugh a little. Juyeon hums, admiring you from a new angle, “God, you look so beautiful.” You blush and bury your head into his neck, littering kisses along his collar as you bounce on his lap a little bit. When you feel his hands move around your hips, before he starts bouncing you up and down, taking control over your movements, he lets out soft little groans as he works you both into a pace. You mumble against his collarbone, “You feel so good, Ju…” And he hums as you feel his hands move down along you as he changes his grip to get a better hold of you. When suddenly, he smacks your ass, and you let out a shocked moan as you look back at him. He grins as he soothes his hand over the mark he left and lets out a groan, “You have such a good ass, baby…” He picks the pace back up as you suck a hickey onto his collarbone, marking him as yours. You didn’t want him making love to anyone but you. 

He kisses your neck gently, not leaving hickeys, just kissing you like you always wished to be. He mumbles against your chest, “Fuck, I love you.” You kiss the top of his head and murmur, “I love you too.” He holds you close to him, burying his face into your chest as he thrusts up into you. You’ve never felt so close to someone before as you wrap your arms around his shoulders, resting your head on his as you both take in the moment. You pull back as he finally finds the spot that makes you moan loudly. He asks, “Right there, baby?” You let out a little noise as you try to tell him, ‘Yes’. And you see his smile grow as you let your head fall back, as he starts hitting the same spot over and over. He wraps his lips around your nipple, sucking on it as he continues his motions. With the energy you have left to talk, you ask, “Can.. can you… can you hold my hand?” He hums as he looks up at you with his mouth full before moving a hand from underneath you. He holds it out to you, and you interlock your fingers, holding his hand tightly. 

His other hand moves up, taking hold of your hip to hold you better as you hold his hand. He continues alternating between both of your breasts as he sucks and nibbles on them, littering them with marks as he does. He pulls away to capture your lips in his, and you both groan into the kiss. When he pulls away, you gasp and hold his hand together before shoving your face into his neck, “Ju… Juyeon.” He groans, “Are you close, sweetheart?” You whine and feel him smile into your collarbone, “I’ll take that as a yes.” You feel his fingers finally circle your clit, and you gasp as your legs start to shake. He whispers, “Come on, you can do it... Cum all over my cock, princess.” You cry out, and he encourages you one last time before you do. And he groans at the sight, mumbling, “You look divine…” As his hips start to stutter underneath you as he reaches his own end, squeezing your hand. 

You look down, huffing out little breaths as you both regulate your breathing. When you look back up at him, you find he’s already looking at you with a dazed smile. And he asks, “So, how was that?” You sigh heavily, “I hope we make love many more times.” His lips curl, and his eyes squint as he grins, “I hope so too, princess.” He kisses you gently. And you smile as you kiss back, finally feeling content. After a couple more minutes, when you’re both fully calm down, he pulls out, and you whine at the loss of sensation, which makes you both giggle. He kisses your nose, “That was cute…” You blush, and he pulls you into his arms to hold you close to him again. You sigh contently if this is what making love felt like. You didn’t want to have it with anyone else. After a while of listening to each other’s heartbeats, he finally speaks up, “So, what do you say we get you cleaned up?” You sigh, “I guess.” He nods and adjusts you in his grip, “Okay, let’s go.” He gently picks you up and takes you to his bathroom before setting you on the counter. 

“You look good sitting there.” You blush, mumble a ‘thanks,’ and watch as he wets a rag. He spreads your legs and cleans up the mess you both made between them. When he moves the rag away, he smiles and kisses you on the forehead. And wipes his mess off before asking, “Do you need to use the restroom?” You laugh as you smile, “Yeah, I should… Can I kiss you?” He smiles before agreeing, “Of course.” You place your hand underneath his jaw and pull him in for a kiss, savoring the taste of his lips. He helps you off the counter before heading towards the open door, “I’ll wait for you.” You nod, “Okay.” He shuts the door behind him, goes to the bedroom, and changes the blanket out. When you return, he says, “I got you some clothes out.” You smile, “Thanks, Ju.” He shrugs, “It’s no problem.” You shimmy into them as he starts going around the room, snuffing out the candles. You smile, feeling comfortable in the outfit, and turn around, finding him still closing candle lids, and ask, “Want help?” He smiles, “Yeah.”

You join him, crawling under the bedsheets when you finish snuffing out the candles. You scoot closer before wearily putting your head on his bare chest, “Is this okay?” He grins as he laughs, “I just finished inside of you less than twenty minutes ago. Of course it is.” You laugh as you snuggle into his chest, feeling safe beside him. He moves his arm, wrapping around your side, and asks, “So?” You look up at him, “I liked it.” “Me too.” You speak without thinking, “What does that make us?” And he hums, “I don’t know what were we before?” You shrug, “I think a whole lot more than best friends. All my past lovers thought I was with you so…” He laughs, “Yours too? What do you say we make it official?” You smile, “I’d like that.” He grins, “Me too.” You settle in further into his chest as he whispers, “Do you wanna go to bed? Or do you wanna watch a movie?” You hum, giving it some thought, and he waits, reaching over to his nightstand, already knowing your answer, “Movie, please.” He smiles, grabbing the remote and turning on your guy’s favorite movie. You snuggle into him closer as you enjoy it together for the hundredth time but as lovers for the first time.

[futurecorps3]

Hi!! I would like to request Kaz x f!reader

I’m so sorry that this is so long and if this isn’t making any sense I can’t explain things for the life of me😭 If you do write this, thank you so much, ily :)

Anyway picture this, a reader who is quite sneaky decides that it would be very funny if she snuck a little note with something like „I live for the way you smile so brightly” into Kaz’s coat when he’s not looking. She manages and when Kaz doesn’t bring it up at all, she sneaks another note in. This continues bcs the reader just thinks Kaz is ignoring it and automatically throwing out the notes without reading them or smth. Over the time the notes get a little bit more brave like „you looked very pretty today, Brekker” and become genuine copmliments. Now i have two ideas how could the ending go. Kaz just casually mentions in a conversations with reader the sweet notes which reader is completely shocked by Or reader finds themselfs curiosly looking around Kaz’s office and stumbles upon a little box on his table. Thinking it’s gonna be some kind of jewelry she opens it and sees ALL the notes she snuck into his coat. But uhoh Kaz steps into the office and his eyes widen when he sees reader standing over the box. Reader gets flustered trying to explain what the fuck was she even doing there but is greeted by Kaz’s silence. He’s embarrased about her now knowing that he has been keeping the little notes since the very beginning ijsksjdks istg I’m going insane

𝐒𝐧𝐞𝐚𝐤𝐲

Masterlist<3

Summary: The one where Y/N thinks she's being sneaky. Pairing: Kaz Brekker x fem!reader Warnings: None I think!! Word Count: 2.3K Requested: Yes

A/N: YES YES YES YES I LOVE THIS!!!! I wanted to use the one where he mentions it casually in a conversation but it all led to reader finding out by accident. Tysm nonnie, enjoy, I'm sorry about the huge delay. Tough couple of months, hope u understand and that I did justice to this beautiful prompt, ily2 <3

˚ · • . ° .

It all started as some stupid game. One only Y/N knew about. Everything about it was very silly, the sneaking around, coming up with what the note would say and when to put it inside his coat's pocket. The first time, the girl snuck the neatly folded paper when he excused himself to go to the restroom and left his jacket behind. Easy.

It read 'Your smile lights up the room, Brekker'. Cheesy, untrue and quite simple. She'd bet all her kruge on it, though. That bastard had a wickedly expressive smirk, so his full smile must be as sentimental as his smirk, right? Maybe her note would make him giggle in the confines of his office, maybe Kaz would burn the paper or toss it in the trashcan he so neatly kept under his desk. Truth is, Y/N didn't have an explanation or reason as to why she started all this nonsense.

The prospect of making Kaz angry or laugh even when she wouldn't witness it was probably it. The girl happened to be a sucker for the adrenaline rush of delivering her teasingly sweet notes, too. She got bolder and more creative, even getting the chance to sneak one during a job where she and Kaz had to pair up.

None of the crows knew except for Jesper, and surprisingly, he didn't tease her about it. When he caught her tucking a little pink piece of paper into the inner pocket of his boss' coat, he scoffed with a little smile and downed his whiskey glass.

"What on earth does it say and... why?" Jes smirked as Y/N returned to her seat next to him. "Not relevant, my friend. Don't snitch," "I could never, love." He laughed at his friend's eccentricities and let it slide. Another little secret shared between them wouldn't hurt nobody. Plus, her favorite sharpshooter had plenty to say when he was there to see Kaz discover the notes.

"I'm telling you, he smiled!" "Jesper, I don't care if he did," the girl giggled. She did. She cared a lot. "Kaz Brekker doesn't smile" "He did that weird upside down frown, not quite a smile, but he wasn't exactly displeased." Y/N had to hide the blush creeping up her cheeks by turning around, downing her glass of scotch. Had she really made Kaz smile? Or, somewhat, change that angry expression he seemed to keep, like it was carved carefully and perpetually on the sharp features of his face? There has to be an award to that, she thinks.

That note she remembered; there was a playful banter happening like many times before at the slat between the crows. They were all sitting down at one of the tables after a long day of kicking out pigeons upset because they lost all their money, drinks and giggles shared in a tired, dazed stupor.

"There is no way we could've made it without him. I mean, imagine me trying to carry Nina's dead-weight down two flights of stairs and out of that house." Y/N laughed as they recalled how useful Matthias turned out to be. "He's my favorite" Nina smiled, kissing the Fjerdan's cheek as he smiled proudly with a light red tint on his face (could be from the alcohol but they all knew his girlfriend made him nervous).

"And Inej, dear, I know I'm yours" the grisha teased her friend, pulling her close as the Suli girl smiled, not confirming or denying the allegations. Then Wylan, a bit tipsy and, for some reason defensive, hugged his boyfriend and declared: "Well, Jesper's my favorite," downing his glass. Jesper pulled it aside, pecking his head lovingly. "Inej's mine".

Wylan perked up from his place in Jes' arms with his mouth agape, making everyone break in laughter as the couple argued, their demo-man leaving the table with his boyfriend chasing after him trying not to laugh "Wait, dear I-I'm joking!" "No you were not! Take the couch". After they all calmed down, Matthias finally spoke. "Demjin, tell us, who's your favorite?".

Theatrical silence fell over the group. Kaz's heart sped up a little and Nina could tell, but said nothing. Then, as he scanned the group with a light smirk and his eyes lingered on Y/N for a minute longer, it sped up even more to then recede. "Oh, I know," the heartrender laughed, grabbing her glass to pour more alcohol on it. "You don't, Nina. I don't have favorites. You're all pretty solid assets," he said, voice deep and Y/N wondered how it would sound whispered in her ear.

"That's the closest we're getting to an 'I love you', guys. Hate to break it to you" Inej joked as everyone agreed. After a few more minutes, too tired to keep going, they all went to bed. Kaz woke up the next day to a note on his doorstep that said 'you're my favorite'. It was a bit different from the others he kept in his office. The letter was cursive, written in a rush on a slightly yellow piece of paper. Black ink.

"You plan on ever telling her?" A voice came from his side. Jesper stood, still in his white sleep shirt and trousers. "No one makes you smile. You should tell her, you know, at least." He was greeted by his boss's silence and the sound of his door closing.

Now, of course he knew. In fact, he figured it out after the fourth note or so, but Y/N didn't need to know that. Selfishly, he had been keeping that weird aching in his chest the girl brought all to himself for almost a year and it was getting tiring. Until he figured it out. He just hoped, to anyone who was willing to listen, that the notes weren't some joke for her.

He hoped that all those nights they spent enjoying the silence, the conversations where he'd let the wounded boy talk instead of the bastard of the barrel and she would listen attentively, almost lovingly, meant something to her. And that the notes were her way of saying 'I'm here and I'm not planning on leaving anytime soon'.

Y/N knew the game she came up with ended up being a breath of fresh air for all the compressed feelings she had for the boy. She had no problem with it. In the end, she was telling him every single thought that crossed her mind when those icy blue eyes turned into warmth when they were alone and he let his guard down. The things she knew she'd never say to Kaz's face.

Or so she thought.

It was a big coincidence, like a butterfly effect. Y/N came back from one of her many investigations (a trip to the Geldstraat to gather some information) and was walking up the stairs to Kaz's office to tell him what he found out. "Turns out you were right, he has two kids" she began, entering to an empty room. She should've left, see if he was in his room or downstairs watching the tables. Yet she didn't leave. Instead, with a heavy sigh, she sat in one of the chairs in front of his desk.

It gave off more of the energy from a studio rather than an office. He seemed to appreciate neatness, from the bookshelves with books arranged alphabetically to the candles placed in the appropriate places so the room could be lit perfectly at night. So, of course, she was going to notice the rectangular red box sitting messily on top of a stack of papers right in front of her.

Again, would've, could've, should've stayed in the chair. She got up and peeked. A shock ran through her body, suddenly feeling so very cold she almost turned to see if the window was open. There sat all of her notes, some a bit more used, probably from him folding and unfolding them several times. At the top was the one she sneaked just that morning; "I sometimes wonder if you think about me just as much as I do. Probably not. Have a good day, though".

A million questions running through her head. Why was he keeping them? Did he know she sent them? And most importantly, why was she so stupid!? Y/N could've just... not! Just not write those stupid notes like she had some stupid teenage crush on stupid Kaz and keep her stupid feelings to her stupid self. But no. She always had to be too much, huh? Her words and emotions spilled out of her like a river. The thing was so big it showed over her wrist.

The creek of the door. She was so inside her head she didn't hear Kaz's steps. Shit. Shit. Shit. Hoping it was her imagination playing tricks on her, she turned around. Hope died and there stood Kaz Brekker, wide-eyed and pale as a corpse. She felt like she had to say something and saints she tried, but the knot on her throat only let a choked, unintelligible sound.

It could've been hours, really. Both of them just stared at each other. Kaz was so unbelievably embarrassed he wanted to ask Jesper to just shoot him in the head to end his suffering, begging on his knees for someone to come and help him. He was never this careless, not with things like the notes. He left them out, going through them for the fourth time that week, to get a drink downstairs. How did he miss Y/N walking through the door?

"Kaz I was just here t-to uhm tell you what I found out on G-Garson. I promise I didn't mean to snoop around l-like I wasn't looking through your stuff. A-anyway who a-are these from? They're very swe-" "You don't have to pretend, Y/N."

He knew. A new dread consumed her, and she dropped her eyes to the floor as quick as humanely possible. So stupid. So stupid. "So stupid" "What?" said Kaz, letting out a breath he didn't realize he was keeping in "I'm so stupid, I'm sorry, Kaz. I-I don't know why I wrote those". Was she truly apologising to him, her head bowed in shame? For what? He looked forward to discovering one of those sweet little notes every day, wondering what kind of message she had left him this time.

Hope. He remembered the hope. Maybe he was this upset because the notes would stop now that she knew he knew? His eyes widened even more when he realized Y/N was standing right in front of him, waiting for Kaz to step out of the way so she could escape this torture. "You're right. You shouldn't have. Y-you should've just told me"

"Tell you what, Kaz?" the girl asked, taking a step back and looking straight into his eyes like he was doing. Kaz Rietveld spoke before Brekker could. "Tell me I am your favorite, that I'm on your thoughts nonstop every single fucking day, and that you consider I look lovely even with my hair in my face. If it is true, tell me right up front. I don't think I could stomach it being some crazy game, so please tell me it is real." Perplexed, she stared.

Kaz wanted it to be real, and she knew damn well it was. "You know I don't like games, Brekker. I mean it. All of it. Every single word is just me trying to catch my name in a whisper in your reactions... counting on making you smile, or at least, to temporarily jolt your thoughts from the generally dreary state they seem to be in."

He led a leather hand to grab hers, tangling their fingers with his. The boy couldn't help but notice how beautiful her eyes looked under the candlelight, warm y/e/c welcoming him home. Making him feel at ease in that saint forsaken land, knowing that with her by his side, everything seemed to be just fine.

"Y/N, since you entered my life, I have been acquainted with a new kind of light. Your presence has brought a certain innocence and laughter that I have not known before. Your character is resilient, as if it has been shaped by the hardships of this city. In my eyes, you are the embodiment of light, and I cannot help but find you lovely at all times, too"

It was a love that defied all logic and reasoning, a love that transcended the boundaries of time and space. They had each found in the other a place of serenity, a sanctuary where they could be themselves and forget the chaos of the world outside. With every passing day, their bond grew stronger, until a little piece of heaven was crafted, right there in their midst.

It was their own personal heaven, a place where they could bask in the warmth of knowing glances and brief touches, and where the mere presence of the other was enough to soothe their souls. They had found a love that whispered "I'm here" in the moments when it was necessary, a love that made a home for a broken boy and a shelter for a scarred girl who would go to the ends of the earth for him.

And as they stood there, hand in hand, they knew that they had found something special. They had found a love that was strong enough to weather any storm, a love that would see them through the trials and tribulations of life.

Together with time, they had created a world that was perfect in its imperfection, a world that was full of love, laughter, and joy. And as they gazed into each other's eyes, they knew that they had found their own personal piece of heaven on earth.

˚ · • . ° .

Hi! Thank you so much for reading, hope you enjoyed:)

Remember, the best way to support writer’s works on here is by REBLOGGING WITH TAGS. I’d very much appreciate it if you did!

Thanks again, stranger. Hope you have a nice day<3

[prettyhandsomeakwardtffiykyk]

Ghosted

A Slade x Lex story I know it's mid but I tried and I got the idea from @ev-arrested for that funny post you'll understand once you read it enjoy

It was a week after joining task force x and Alex or lex as he asked Amanda to call him was doing ok he was working in a lab he was allowed to do whatever Experiments he wanted having an overall good time he took Jimmy advice and chased after his dreams and it was pretty good deal he got along with Amanda and everyone else,lex thought everyone was ok it's had it's upsides

But there was a downside ( kind of) and it's name was agent wilson ever since he joined it's felt like wilson was trying to antagonizing him on Purpose he didn't know what the guys deal was but one popular theory was that Alex was stealing all the attention from Waller that's must be it what else could be and while lex is in his office making the blue print for his next big project and thinking he hear the door open and he turns to see who it is "speak of the devil" lex said in his head and puts his pen down

"Agent wilson what a surprise" lex said sarcastically

"Hello Alex what's are you doing" slade said grabbing the paper and looking over the blue prints and lex immediately tries to get them back but slade was taller and put the prints above his head just out if reach

"Are you always this childish wilson and it's my blue prints that's I've been working on for like a day now so give them back!" Lex jumps up to tries And grab them but slade just extends his hand up more

"No just with you now come on put a little more effort into getting those prints Alex it's not that hard just grab them" slade says in a mocking tone extending his hand more and bring them back down to taunt him more

"Or I could go to Amanda and tell her how you're not letting me work and trust me I'm not the one who going to get in trouble ninja" lex said in a warning tone when in reality he wasn't actually going to say anything not wanting probablys in the place that's going to help him achieve his dream but slade didn't know that

Slade gave him a look that's said whatever and then drops the papers and now their scattered around the floor "oops my bad lex my hand slipped and go ahead tell Mrs. Waller she definitely not going to believe you seeing as I'm her second in command"

"Of course that what this is about" lex say while picking up the papers

"what was that" slade says kneeling down "I didn't quite catch that Alex why do you speak up"

Lex's gets up and is completely down "what is your problem with me! I have done nothing to you wilson, if this is about mrs.waller attention it's not my fault you have issues especially if she likes me more"

After a few moments of silence and Wilson's Wilson's faces basically saying are you fucking serious right now " you really don't remember me huh"

"Not a fucking clue why don't you spell it out" Alex said upset and walking up to wilson to show how fed up he was

"Well you know me by a different name Alex you know that and it's a shame you remember was I really that forgetting" slade say Sitting on the desk to face Alex at eye level

"Just spit it out asshole I don't have all day" lex said staring at him getting more upset

Slade pulls out his phone and is on it for a minute and then looks at it and reads aloud "Alexander luthor, 25 not looking for anything serious sound familiar lex" slade said with a smirk

Lex did indeed know what he was reading it was Lex's grinder account profile while he was embarrassed it was just a dating profile everyone has one "ok and? You're bothering me cause I have a grinder profile I'm confused are you being homophobic rights now?"

"No you stupid ginger I have a profile and my name is slade if that rings any bell I thought you were smart but apparently you need better glasses" slade said flicking lex in the forehead and caused Alex to squeak out a small ow and covers his forehead

And after like 20 minutes of thinking he finally realized what was going "ohhhh fuck your the guy I ghosted" and slade say "no shit I remembered you the minute I saw you but apparently you couldn't even remember the guy who offered to take you to the movie"

" I know I know I'm sorry" Lex's said embarrassed and confused

And finally a big thanks to @rk886 for inspiring me to make this fic

[aita-blorbos]

"AITA for caring way too much about the cleanliness of my friend?" Okay, maybe asshole might be putting it too harshly, nor am I the hole of a donkey, though I will go with the format since that’s what prior posts have done…

I (13F) am involved in this very fun friend group consisting of AR(16F), AM(13F) and AY(16?F). We each have our own wacky misadventures, and when we’re not off running into friends, weirdos, weirdo-friends or resolving incidents, we hang out with each other! My house is pretty big despite doubling as a greengrocer store, and for some reason the family’s okay with it.

Though my main reason for posting this is in regards to some things I feel about AR. She… doesn’t have very hygienic parameters, saying that it’s overrated, despite the fact that this has been the catalyst for several battles of the not-lethal, mostly silly kind. I, on the other hand…take this very personally because the irrational variables that AR’s stench has to my olfactory senses IS UNACCEPTABLE!!! IT’S LIKE 20 UNWASHED GYM KIDS IN THE SAME ROOM BUT IN ONE PERSON! Worst of all, she thinks once a week every month is going to cut it! More like cut the cheese, phee-yewwww! @_@

(I mean blue cheese, by the way. Don’t even think about having it. Just. Don’t.)

So! I’ve taken it upon myself to remind AR to take care of herself in the physical sense! Every day! Every week! Every… well, anything! Now everyone’s just taking issue with it for some reason! AM’s staring at me like I am some weirdo, even going so far as to say that I’m getting additionally bizarre on this topic! Saying over and over again that while AR does smell funny, she doesn’t like how hung up I am about this!

For obvious reasons AR’s acting is kind of annoyed towards me… come on, I’m just trying to look out for your health! People have made jokes about you regarding this, why are you surprised?! Being spick and span is an important fundamental when it comes to your appearance, how dare you gawk at meee!!!

What concerns me the most however is that AY, who holds the top candle and top spot for being the most unintentionally quirky of the group is telling me with entire sincerity and forwardness to “please stop these kooky tangents about AR’s odor”. Like, huh???? I’m just trying to explain to AR and the rest of her friends that being a slob is a no-good move! All it does is enforce negative parameters of self-care, and taking a shower or a bath could help! Why is everyone here treating me like I’m somehow walking upside-down? (Though considering what happens from time to time, I don’t think that’s out of the question…)

I don’t think I am TA (the…you know), because I’m trying to make sure AR is cleaner instead of having the stench of 10 durians on a hot summer day and everyone else is acting like their noses are broken when it comes to this! At the same time, AM and AY are growing somewhat uncomfortable, maybe by the truth that AR really needs to try cleaning herself up more, or as they keep saying, because I’m bringing this up way too much?! This is important! AR needs to be presentable and fresh! Not looking like she just walked out of a dingy dungeon…

With everything in mind, I shall reiterate the main point. Am I the…ahem, asshole? Or… if we’re going with the more suitable explanation according to the problem explained here…

Am I the weirdo?! Please say no, please say noooo!

[i-promise-i-am-not-on-drugs]

Alright, rewatching episode 05×02 of stranger things, let's go!

I'm going to write what I thought/saw in each scenes, so it's probably going to be long.

1) Joyce

Wow, that house is really looking ominous as hell.

2) Will and Mike

Okay first of all THE FAMOUS WILL VOICE OMGJDKKKDKFKSKSJJCJXISKWJXJJWH!!! TuT💕

Sorry.

Anyway, I really like that Mike is trying to help Will by giving him some sort of reason as to why all this is happening.

Also,

Will, stuttering: You really think so?

Mike, softly: Yeah. Yeah, I really do.

This is just so sweet.

3) Hopper

Damn, I forgot about that.

This underground place is so full of toxic spores, I'm surprised he even walked this far!

Also, he was kinda dumb about it. I mean, these spores are pretty huge, I wouldn't go in there without covering my mouth and nose honestly.

Rip Hopper, I know you'll survive that but I feel for you man 🫡

4) Nancy and Jonathan

"you want a single. (side eye) Or a double." LMAO--

Anyway.

(The hand/scar thing is so adorable I love them. )

Damn, amazing communication skills guys. 🙂

5) Mike, Will and Joyce

Love how Mike is staying next to Will, even if he knows that it's probably dangerous. :)

Also,

Will: I think he's in trouble. I think he's going to die.

Woah, that's actually pretty cool. Also creepy, but still pretty cool. :D

6) Hopper

Guess Will has someone to relate with now. (Puking weird and disgustingly slimly Upside Down stuff)

Nice, he finally though about protecting his mouth and nose.

A cigarette really? ._.

I mean, at least he left something.

7) The Sinclairs

(I love Erica she's so sassy)

Miss and Mr Sinclair are such cool parents! :)

They're my favorite adult couple if I'm being honest.

I love how Lucas asked his dad what he does when his mom's angry, it really shows that he has a big crush on Max. And it's pretty cute too! :3

(The Sinclair mens really are a perfect example of "my girl is mad at me I hope I die" lol)

8) the Handersons

Oh noo, Mewsyyyyy..!! :(

Dustin, you smart manipulative little shit. (This is both so sad and so funny help)

That plan to catch Dart was actually really smart!! Amazing job Dustin!! :)

Also, "I'm sorry. You ate my cat." that made me laugh for like two minutes straight lol--

9) Eleven

That random man in the truck was so nice, I hope he'll succeed in whatever he's doing in his life.

Alright, go find your mom El. I don't remember how that went, but hopefully not too bad.

ELEVEN MY GIRL YOU CAN'T JUST USE YOUR POWERS TO ENTER SOMEONE'S HOUSE DEAR---

Alright, that went.... Alright I guess... Hhh...

10) Nancy, Jonathan and Murray

Murray is such an interesting character, I really liked this part.

Also, completely destroying his evidences was such a Nancy thing to do lol--

11) Max and Lucas

(Hell yeah, fuck Billy. Anyway.)

Alright, I really love lumax, and I know that it wouldn't have happened if this scene didn't, but I still think it was a bad decision to tell Max what happened.

I know she "accepted the risk", but she wasn't taking it seriously and that was pretty dumb (but completely understandable) of her.

Now, let's go Lucas. Put your future girlfriend in the secret!

12) Will, Mike, Joyce, and Bob

Wow, Bob is actually really, really smart. I forgot about that too.

(Also, I really love how Mike and Will are always next to each other. That's cute. ^^)

13) Hopper

Okay, first of all, ew.

And then, good job Jim!! You found an exit! :D

14) Dustin (+Erica)

I mean, at least the cat got a proper grave.

Ooohhhh,, right. He cleaned the blood. Must be slightly traumatic.

Like I said before, I love Erica and her sassy attitude, but right now it's not playing for her side. Not cool Erica.

15) Eleven and Becky (+Mama) (forgot her name)

I really love how understanding Becky is there. She's trying to stay calm and find aweser, without pushing El to get them. It's nice.

And I forgot that her mom also had some kind of powers, that's pretty cool!

16) Will, Mike, Joyce, and Bob

He's really, really smart. That's cool.

Poor dude must be so confused thought--

17) Dustin and Steve at the Wheeler's

Damn, two hours is fucking long--

Anyway.

Ted is pretty fucking useless, you're right Dustin. I like how it's really clear that Dustin has no respect at all for Ted, I mean he's swearing without even thinking twice about it! Really shows how passive Ted is in everyone's lives.

Steve coming to give Nancy flowers and "apologize"... My boy stop lying to yourself, you know this relationship is already fucked.

Anyway.

It's funny how Dustin orders him around and he doesn't even blinks lol

18) Hopper

Yep, the spores are getting to him again.

And the vines, apparently. Rest in pieces my dude. (Sorry)

19) Lucas and Max (+Billy)

I mean, of course she's not going to immediately believe you, who would! I mean, at least she has some doubts.

Alright, fuck Billy again, in a non sexy way, can't wait to see him die. (/hj)

20) Nancy, Jonathan, and Murray

Murray thinking with alcohol and music is so funny to me.

Also, he's so right about the counter thing.

Anyway.

That scene is so badass. ✨

21) The Lab

Welp, that's weird as fuck.

22) Eleven, Becky, and Mama

Well, that for sure was intense. Also made me really uneasy, but it was pretty interesting.

Guess we know why "rainbows" now.

Also, tinny eight (I forgot the name she chose), if it is actually her, is so adorable. :)

23) Will, Mike, Joyce, Bob, Hopper, and Hawkins Lab

Poor Bob is confused as hell.

The way Joyce is immediately clinging to Hopper to make sure he's okay makes me kinda sad for Bob, but I guess we know why.

(Also, Jim almost forgetting his hat and going back to take it was so funny to me lol)

Alright now, Will.

Nothing much to say here, but HOLY HELL WHAT THE FUCK MY POOR BOY IS HAVING A SEIZURE!!!! DO SOMETHING PEOPLE??

— End note

Welp, that episode was something! I'll watch the next one in a bit.

[punkslovepoints]

THE A IS FOR ALLY: A STRANGER THINGS FIC (STEDDIE) PT 2

After his friends come out one by one, Steve settles comfortably into his new role as an ally. He moves to the city with Robin, joins groups, attends protests, even takes a gender studies class. 

Then in 1991 Eddie comes crashing back into his life.

If you'd have asked seventeen year old Eddie Munson who he imagined he'd name as his best friend when he grew up, prissy Nancy Wheeler wouldn't have appeared on the longlist, let alone at the number one spot.

But living with her they had developed a friendship unlike any he had before.

It had taken a while. She wasn't the most forthcoming person, she was hard around the edges, something built up from years of grief, loss and having to be the smartest, most capable person in the room, but he kinda loved that about her. She suffered no fools. Yet she respected him, Eddie, who grew up feeling like an idiot, repeating senior year three times, Nancy Wheeler liked him for his intelligence, for his conversation.

They had started hanging out almost by necessity. Robin and Steve still committed to going on dates once a week, leaving the loft and heading off on adventures together. Sometimes it was as simple as a coffee, but often they'd come back covered in paint after attending a protest of some kind, or return with tales of how Robin had attempted and failed to steal a monkey from Indianapolis zoo, a story he never really got to the bottom of.

Their weekly adventures left Nancy and Eddie at a bit of a loss without their natural buffers. Nancy, being the more organized of the two had come to him with an offer. They'd try out their own dates. One to begin with to see what they actually had in common, beyond the obvious, then more in the future if the first one worked out.

They agreed to start small with a coffee date.

Nancy met him there from work, sat down opposite him, spine straight, hands clasped in front of her, her purse to her side. “I thought we could play twenty questions.”

Eddie laughed, "Jesus, Wheeler. Is this a date or an interview?"

She smiled a sly smile at him, "There's a difference?"

He laughed again. “So what are the rules of this date-slash-interview?”

“We ask twenty questions between us, ten each. You can’t ask what you’ve been asked and no follow-up questions.” She paused, then pointed at him, ”And we get increasingly personal the longer we go on.” Eddie grinned. This could be fun.

Nancy started. “What’s your favorite color?”

“Yellow?”

“Not black?”

“No. No follow-up questions. Favorite musician?”

“Blondie. What book have you read that stayed with you?”

“March 3rd 86 edition of Newsweek,” he joked. Nancy threw him a look. He put on a voice and quoted, “The Devil has come to America, ” then laughed, "I mean, obviously it's Lord of The Rings. Favorite contemporary musician”

“You.”

“Funny.”

“I dunno, Guns N Roses” Eddie raised an eyebrow and she shrugged. “What did you want to be when you grew up?”

“A firetruck.”

“Like a fireman?”

“No, just a firetruck. Spent weeks on end running around wailing at the top of my voice. No wonder my parents got rid of me.” Nancy winced, but no follow-ups.

“What did you want to be?”

“No repeats. You’re breaking the rules of the game already.”

“What can I tell you, I’m not a fan of authority. Answer the question.”

“A journalist. Unsurprisingly, I’m pretty single minded. Do you think your life would have been different if you'd graduated the first time round?"

"Yes. I'd never have met Chrissy."

"Shit."

"Yeah. What did you like the most about Barb?"

"That's a nice one.” Nancy took her time to answer. “She was always watching out for me even when I wasn't watching out for myself. Do you still dream about it"

"The Upside Down? Of course. Do you wish it had never happened?"

"Of course," she responded immediately and then thought for a little longer, "Some parts of it. Maybe not others."

"Which parts?"

"No follow up questions," she smirked. "Would you have done anything differently if you could do it again?"

"No. I don't think so. Running back to fend off the bats bought you more time. Sad I missed out on the finale though. Do you think your mum had an affair with Billy Hargrove?"

"Low blow, Munson. I know there were rumors. No, I don't think she did. I do think she wanted to. What happened with your parents?"

Eddie shrugged. "They didn't want me, Wayne did. How old were you when you lost your virginity?"

"Sixteen. Steve Harrington."

"Cute."

"Shut up. When did you realize you were gay?"

"Probably about fourteen, Magnum PI."

"Tom Sellek?"

"No follow up questions."

"That's not a question, I'm just surprised."

"What made you fall in love with Robin?"

"No one thing. She's just Robin."

"Cop out answer, but accepted."

"Next question. Tom Sellek?"

Eddie laughed, "It was the chest hair. I'm a sucker for overt masculinity. Question eighteen. When did you stop loving Steve?"

She smiled, "Romantically, probably a few months before we broke up my junior year. But I'll never stop loving him, not properly. We weren't right together, and what I have with Robin now is obviously so much better in every way. But he'll always be my first love. That means something."

Eddie smiled at her, stirred his coffee, "Your question now."

"When did you?"

"When did I what?" He knew what she was asking but he wanted to buy himself a bit of time.

"When did you stop loving Steve?"

“I thought repeating questions was against the rules.”

She smiled, “I think we've both broken that one."

He considered lying, considered asking surprised, asking what she meant. Despite how many questions he'd answered already, this one was different, this one wasn't in the past. Then he realized he'd left the silence to hang for too long. That was an answer in itself. He looked at her.

"Even now?" She asked. She didn't sound all that surprised.

He shrugged, "Even now."

"That sucks. I'm sorry."

Eddie laughed, "It's fine. It really is. You said, right. You're never going to really stop loving him? Maybe nobody does? Maybe once Steve Harrington finds his way under your skin he just stays there."

"Like a parasite."

"God, the hottest parasite I've ever seen." Nancy's laugh was a little snort. Cute. They watched each other for a beat.

"Final question. The most personal question in the world. What would win in a fight, a badger or a baboon."

Nancy laughed again. "Are we talking European badger or Honey Badger here?" She asked.

It was Eddie's turn to laugh this time. ”There’s a difference?”

They continued their dates. Any time Robin and Steve set off on their adventures, Nancy and Eddie would head for coffee, or something a little stronger. Their conversations would mostly revolve around asking each other increasingly perplexing questions about life, the universe and everything, but every once in a while, Nancy would ask about Steve. Check how Eddie was doing. He appreciated having somebody to talk to.

[READ THE REST OF THE CHAPTER ON A03]

Badges in the image credits:Buffalo State Activist Pin & Button Exhibit [c. 1970-2018] and The ArQuives Artifacts Collection

[thefamilyeldritchabomination]

Chapter Ten: Thank You For The Venom Pt. 2

“Dorian, what exactly are you drawing now? Tell me it's not more brutal deaths of Freddy again this time around.” Lust asked, becoming both annoyed and concerned at the level of hatred Dorian was displaying.

 “No..though that would’ve been perfect for Freddy..” Dorian eerily responded as he finished the crayon drawing of Greed getting his top half being obliterated by a plasma beam of some kind.

 “Wait…is that supposed to be Greed? You should’ve added in his dumbass smirk in there for good measure.” Lust said, impressed with Dorian being able to draw Greed’s shoe pants relatively well. Giving the thumbs up, Dorian went to draw the smirk with his crayon. Lust just watched on as she sipped her afternoon tea when Envy and Dolly returned from their outing at the museum. It had taken them a while to pick out the right blackberry mead. It turned out trying to find the exact blend from nearly four hundred years ago was a challenge to say the least. Ultimately though, through sheer hardheadedness and intense craving, Envy managed to get that blend. That mead was held proudly in Envy’s grip like a war trophy as they shifted back to their preferred form after being out of the apartment for a good chunk of the day. Dolly, on the other hand, was absolutely surprised that Envy wasn’t feeling drunk after tasting so many different samples of blackberry mead. Lust gave Dolly a smirk as she saw the confused look on Dolly’s face, placing her tea down. “You realize that appearances aren't the only thing Envy can change, right?” Lust said in her smooth tone as Dolly took her seat.

 “What exactly do you mean?” Dolly asked, now wanting a bit more answers as Envy jumped in.

 “I like being in control of myself, so with alcohol, I simply just enlarge my liver or speed up my metabolism to avoid getting drunk.” Envy explained, putting the blackberry mead away into the fridge to chill for a while before it gets served.

 “That’s fair enough, drunkenness isn’t very pleasant for a lot of folk from what I understand.” Dolly said, accepting the fact Envy does commit unseen body horror to themself to maintain self control.

 Envy was relieved that the reason was accepted straight up and not being forced to explain why they hated being drunk. The upside of being with the younger homunculi was very much the fact they had never seen Envy drunk before, unlike Greed who saw it as a ‘whimsically funny’ story to recount or heaven forbid Danta spoke about it. It's almost amusing to think that most people believe that drunkenness is simply saying silly things or doing something trivial for laughs that a factor is often forgotten, the loss of muscle control. Envy hid chuckle at the little overseen fact, best to let the others think it's just the former rather than the gruesome latter. The drawing Dorian made caught Envy’s eyes as an eyebrow raised a bit. “Is that supposed to be Greed?” Envy asked, impressed that the shoe pants legs were done pretty well in crayon. “Yes, he even has the shit eating smirk too..” Dorian replied, proud of his rather violent piece of art.

 “If I give you some photos of some certain people, think you can make drawings of them with the dumbest possible faces possible? I’ve been needing some things to throw darts at.” Envy asked when the apartment started to shake.

 Without having to think much, everyone, Dolly having to pick up Dorian, ducked under the table to let the tremor pass by. Envy and Lust looked at each other with widened eyes as they both knew where that tremor came from. It simply had to be the underground city, their home, there was no other explanation for it. It lasted about a minute or two when the tremor from down below ceased and Envy made a dash for the phone to call up Sloth to figure out what the hell just happened. Lust was checking over Gluttony as Dolly slowly got up from under the table with Dorian. The line picked up with Sloth on the other end, still having that lifeless zombie like tone. “I see you’ve noticed the tremor too.” Sloth stated, expecting this call to happen the moment Dante set off on her quest to reinforce the city down below. “You could say that, now, what exactly happened to the underground city?” Envy asked, trying their damndest to keep their temper down.

 “I suppose you didn’t know, there was an explosion in Dublith and Dante made a rash decision to reinforce the underground. I’m not exactly sure what she reinforced the underground with just yet though.” Sloth plainly said, not once getting worried about what the living conditions will be like just yet for the underground. “So you’re telling me to go see it for myself? Thanks for being so useful there Sloth.” Envy snarled as they slammed the phone on the receiver.

 “Envy, what the hell happened?” Lust asked, now that she was done checking over Gluttony and ready to focus on the bigger picture. “Well Lust, Pride’s little ego hunt has caused Dante to panic and transmute the entire underground. We're going to have to check on it right now.” Envy said with anger in their tone. “That’s not going to work, one of us has to be here to do the afternoon check in on the target and ready him for pick up tomorrow.” Lust explained, becoming fazed and annoyed with the rollercoaster this job has been. “I need backup in case the underground is unstable seeing as she went out of her way to transmute an entire underground city.” Envy defended their plan, especially since they’ll all have to go back down there eventually.

 “If it's really that big of a deal, maybe I could go with you and let Lust take care of Freddy.” Dolly said, mainly because she was curious what this underground hellcity looks like.

 “Dolly, really, it’s alright, it can wait.” Lust said, hoping Envy won’t be stupid enough to let the eldritch being get close to a death fearing monster. “That sounds like a deal, Lust, we’ll be back later.” Envy said, not really thinking at this point. “But what about Dante!?” Lust responded, now having to put her foot down. “Shit…I’m going to call Sloth again to check.” Envy said as they went right back to the phone to call up Sloth again. “I almost forgot about the wretched creature, thanks for the reminder Lust.” Dolly hummed, having forgotten her brief encounter with the human hermit crab after witnessing the massive mead tasting Envy did.

 Envy held a finger up to silence everyone in the room as they waited for Sloth to pick up. As per usual with Sloth, she took her time forcing Envy to wait until the line was picked up. Flustered from being placed on the wait, Envy tried to stay calm with the use of rather violent mental images.

 “Is everything alright? You’ve called back a whole lot sooner than I’d thought.” Sloth asked, failing miserably in sounding concerned.

 “Yes, I just needed to know if Dante is still down there.” Envy explained, not thrilled with having to speak again with a humanoid doll.

 “I see you’re still avoiding your mother, but no, she’s still down there. I do, however, think you should see her, Dante is afterall preparing to make a new Pride.” Sloth unemotionally chidded before dropping the news of a new Pride. “Wait, you’re lying, right? Dante wouldn’t do something that brash, it’s way too soon to consider making a new Pride and does she even have a candidate?!” Envy yelled in shock before asking in a fast manner.

 “Sad to say, but our current Pride has rubbed Dante the wrong way today. So his termination notice will be arriving any time during the following two to three months. I am also surprised that you don’t know who the candidate is considering you were the one to kill him not too long ago.” Sloth said, feeling no amount of pity or worry for her other employer, figuring Dante will just make her work under the new Pride instead.

 “Dante and I had a deal that she wouldn’t make a homunculus based after targets I had to terminate. She knows damn well that’s going to cause fights, what is Dante even thinking at this point!?” Envy snarled over the phone, hating how conceited Sloth was turning out to be.

 “I truly don’t care either way, I am afterall not paid enough to give any sort of concerns at this point. So long as Dante fulfills her promise to make me human, then I have nothing really to argue about.” Sloth simply said as the sound of the elevator could be heard in the background, likely Dante returning from her homemade hell down below.

 Having to bite their tongue on telling Sloth the truth, Envy slammed the phone back on the receiver, Lust looking rather concerned at the aftermath of the interaction. Likewise, Dolly was just as concerned about the latest development along with the juicy nugget of information about how homunculus are made. Dorian, on the other hand, went to draw an appallingly hideous portrait of Sloth, handing it to Envy. With a sigh, Envy accepted the disaster portrait of Sloth to throw darts at later on. “You’re the only good thing that Freddy has made.” Envy commented as Dorian blank faced patted Envy on the back.

 “Is Dante seriously considering making a new Pride on such short notice?” Lust asked, not liking where this trainwreck was going.

 “She is and she’s using Hughe Maes for it. The asshole wouldn’t even have the normal ten year training time either, Dante is determined to execute that stupid humanoid doll within a month or two.” Envy groaned as they face planted into the table.

 “That is going to cause a mess for all of us….what exactly did Pride do to get that reaction!?” Lust was ready to leave the apartment to confront Dante herself, before her attention turned to Gluttony. “Oh, that’s because we just lost Lior.” Gluttony spoke up innocently after listening into the conversation. “Gluttony…what do you mean we lost Lior?” Lust was now panicked seeing as Lior was their key location. “The radio said so, Pride’s wife is pulling troops out and trials are being held soon.” Gluttony explained, pointing to the radio, Lust nearly dropping her cup of tea. “That’ll do, that would certainly do the trick in getting Pride executed so soon.” Envy admitted, getting up from the table and motioning for Dolly to follow.  

 Picking up Dorian and getting him into her backpack, Dolly got ready to follow Envy out of the apartment to see the underground horror show. Lust did feel a little relieved that she didn’t have to watch over Dorian once again, but at the same time was considering just leaving Dante seeing as this whole plan is going up in smoke. On the other hand, Dolly was mentally debating with herself over the implications that were spoken over on the phone. Were the homunculi really based on dead people or were they like some sort of weird, rock eating vampires from being resurrected by alchemy? There was one thought alone that stung the most when it first appeared, was Envy someone she once knew. Clearly, Envy couldn’t be William, right? Deep in the back of Dolly’s mind, however, there was the chance that Envy could be William, they can, afterall, shapeshift. “Hey, earth to the Parfait Haired Pipsqueak! CAN YOU HEAR ME!?” Envy raised their voice, snapping Dolly back into reality and right in front of the stairway to the sewers. 

 “Yep, sorry, I must have been thinking a bit too hard.” Dolly said, a bit embarrassed she zoned out like that again. “Whatever, look, you’re going to have to focus while we travel for the elevator. The elevator is a bit well hidden, so it’s very easy to miss if you’re an absolute disaster of a homunculus.” Envy explained as they led Dolly back down into the sewer.

 The rats of the sewers clearly were glad to see the odd duo with their horrid clay monster as they scurried once again past their feet. Running a hand along the sludge like sewer wall, Envy felt along to find the button to open up the elevator. Dolly couldn’t help but wince at Envy as they had to touch the disgusting interior with a plethora of diseases marinating from the collected wastes. For Envy, however, they would likely just cut that hand off after this check up on the underground. An audible click-like sound could be heard as the wall of the sewer started to split apart and revealed the elevator to the underground city. Wasting no time, Envy motioned for Dolly to get into the elevator before following her in as the doors closed to the descent. The creaks and moans of the elevator were concerning to say the very least as Dolly, Envy, and Dorian stood. Carefully, Dolly looked over to Envy, deciding to break the silence in hopes of drowning out the unnerving sound.

 “Are there any rules in regards to the underground city?” Dolly asked rather than ask the real question that was on her mind.

 “Not really other than no fighting in the living quarters unless we’ve been breached. Though, I can’t guarantee that one will remain as the only rule until I can get a good look at the underground.” Envy said, eyes narrowing a bit at the idea of possible more rules to be added underground.

 “Look, you made a face earlier while I was on the phone. Just understand that killing off certain humans is simply just part of the job, sometimes our fellow homunculi if enough rules are broken.” Envy added, feeling now was a good time to have this chat. “It wasn’t that, even though that part about killing being a requirement is concerning. How exactly do you feel about that policy?” Dolly responded, already having the idea they were on the murder happy side of things with Gluttony being a convenient body disposal method. 

 “Would you ask a farmer how they felt after having to kill a chicken for meat?” Envy asked in return, figuring using Dolly’s own terminology skills to get the point through. “Okay, that’s fair enough, but are you honoring the kill?” Dolly the flesh-eating eldritch being responded.

 “I’ll need to explain that a bit more.” Envy raised an eyebrow once again, Dolly at this point proving to be a little curve ball when it came to conversations. “Well, are you using everything from the body like eating the meat or using the bones for weapons?” Dolly said, hoping that would explain things better. “Congratulations, I’m now going to try my hand at human bone weapons. Now, what exactly was on your mind?” Envy proceeded to ask, their reptile eyes right on Dolly. “Well..you said that the homunculi were based on people who have passed. Did I know you beforehand? You knew a line that someone had once said in a conversation from a long time ago.” Dolly finally spilled, a bit anxious about what the answer would be. “I don’t know, I do like to play a bit, especially if I’m bored.” Envy danced around the question, feeling a bit in the mood for a mind game. “Bored you say? Well, I suppose I can tell you a story in exchange for an answer.” Dolly said, making eye contact with Envy. “Not another ghost story, that one lost my interest.” Envy stated, though they did enjoy seeing Lust being unnerved by it. “No, not a ghost story, a story from my past. Perhaps you might like to hear it.” Dolly explained, having a bit of an idea in her mind.

 “Interesting, now why exactly would you propose that?” Envy asked, an eyebrow raised as they watched for a response. “Well, you did share a bit of your past with me earlier in the museum, it’s only polite if I did the same. Perhaps this could be something to trade as a way to relieve some boredom as you’ve put it.” Dolly explained, hoping this would work and get her some answers.

 “Interesting, I’ll take you up on it, but, if you mention anything of my past to anyone, I’ll unleash a horrible plague in your hometown.” Envy shrugged as if it was really nothing.

 “And let me guess, you’ll name it after me too for good measures?” Dolly casually snarked a bit.

 “Well of course! I simply have to make sure it’ll be something to haunt you for a long time. Now, enough stalling, share the story.” Envy had quipped right back, clearly they were the most relaxed in this hellevator.

 Dolly smiled a bit as she pieced together a story that’ll likely get Envy’s attention and sure enough, there was one from recent times that would be of use to her at that moment. It was quiet for the time being, mainly Dolly wanting to tug Envy’s chains a bit. Dolly waited a bit for Envy to get impatient before smiling and starting the story finally.

[terrifictoonman]

[WP] "Ha, you stepped right into my trap!" the young witch cheered. "Now I'm going to ... to ... ... I actually have to clue what, you are my first ever human catch..." [Reddit - u/WernerderChamp] (12/12/23)

{Headache}

"Well, and I'm just spitballing here," says Ian, "you could just let me go?" The man hangs upside down over an open bonfire. A shadowy figure lurks just outside the fire's light, in the forest's dark, glaring at Ian with their bright green eyes.

"...No," says the witch.

"Heh, can't blame a guy for trying, right?" says Ian. The witch groans as a green rag flies out from the darkness, wrapping itself around Ian's mouth.

"You talk too much," says the witch. She paces around the edge of light, Ian catching the occasional glimpses of brown leather boots darting in and out of sight. "OK, what do humans do? They don't fly, no magical attunement one way or the other, they can't breathe underwater...for long at least." The witch's eyes look at Ian once again as an inhumanly long shadowy hand reaches out from the darkness, grabbing Ian and pulling him away from the fire. "You wouldn't happen to be hiding any horns or a second brain, perhaps?"

Ian spoke but remained incoherent due to the rag. With a quick flash from the witch's eyes, the rag suddenly turned to ash, causing Ian to cough.

"I mean," Ian chuckles, "depending on who you ask, my second brain's better than the one you're talking to." An animalistic growl hums from the forest. A pale human hand reaches out, its fingers stained in black, grabbing Ian by the mouth.

"Maybe I should take your tongue first," says the witch. "At the very least, it'll shut you up long enough for me to think!"

"Hey, you're the one who disintegrated the gag, not me," Ian mocked. "By the way, you have really soft hands." The shadow hand lets go of Ian, letting him swing over the roaring flame. "Oh, come on! You're about to kill me anyway. The least you can do is let me prattle on a bit until you figure out what to do with me."

"And why would I put myself through that?" the witch asks.

"Well, seeing as you live in the middle of nowhere," Ian says, "I'd probably make pretty entertaining company. Unless you're expecting someone else to stumble their way here?" The witch stares at Ian as a sudden gust of wind sends an intense shiver down the man's spine. The witch walks into the light, revealing herself as a short, lanky woman dressed in a stained brown hoodie over a torn purple dress. Her witch hat shielded her pale skin from the light, save for her long, crooked nose.

The witch traced a glowing ring into the air with her finger, flinging it at Ian. The ring went around Ian's neck before erupting in a blinding light. After regaining his senses, Ian quickly surveys his surroundings, finding himself under the witch's arm as the two move deeper into the forest. The witch notices Ian looking at her and holds his head up before her, putting the two at eye level.

Ian tries to free himself from the witch to no avail, unable to do little more than tilt his head slightly.

"Careful," the witch says, "you've been through a lot tonight. You might be feeling a little...lightheaded." The witch cackles maniacally into the air as Ian's face fills with dread, realizing what she has done to him. Ian's terrified screams pair with the witch's horrid laughter, the two echoing throughout the forest.

Before coming to a sudden stop as another gust of wind sends an intense chill through them both. The witch tucks Ian's head under her arm as she races through the forest back to her warm and cozy hut, Ian urging her to hurry every step of the way.

----------

Thanks for reading, and I hope you enjoyed the story!

If you have any comments, critiques, or corrections, please let me know down below (as long as they're constructive (or funny)).

Stay safe, keep warm, and be kind to yourself and others.

ToonMan, AWAY!

[garfieldsladybird]

I lost interest in S.H.I.E.L.D when season six started and when I started watching season 6 I was just so done with it. Not understanding anything that was going on.

But now that I’m older and I’m watching it again, I’m actually paying attention every single episode, as much as I possibly can and I’m also not allowing myself to just play the show as background noise.

notes ;)))) also spoilers if you haven’t watched shield 🤨

season six actually starting pretty good. idk man. pass me was. Like usual.

I’m on s6 e6, I just started episode six. but from what I know right now— idk I kind of just go in rants about things. Enjoy :)

so Daisy and Simmons and two other people (that I actually feel like are best friends, that really don’t want to admit it and i feel like one of them is gay) but that’s beside the point. they all went to space. deep space. they become the guardians of the Galaxy man. now how? Because they had the spaceship from season five, that spaceship was the spaceship at the general took over. Well, I think they took the little thingy that if you just put coordinates in it and flip a switch you get teleported to that spot. but still use the Zephyr so they most likely had to add the space thingys it can do from the spaceship. They went to go find fitz. dont get me started on that.

Wait, so fitz is alive and so is Simmons. and so is their grandchild. That was from the future. Deke yes ? 🤨 but yeah he’s alive as well. But fits died at the end of season five. But didn’t really die. He was in a coma, was supposed to be in a coma for fucking 75 years. Poor dude, he’s had to be in a coma for 75 years twice. But he didn’t really make the full 75 years because some weird sharp ass fidget spinner ran through their ship in space. so yeah.

so does mean that the world of where deke came from is still going to happen? That’s the only thing I’m focused on. I love deke ngl. He’s hot ;)

but while they’re doing that. The team on the mainland is chasing down a duplicate of Colson from a different world that’s been alive for like fucking years. And I mean hundreds of years. They’re chasing him down because Colson’s actually dead. Also, I feel like we should’ve gotten more of Colson and may, I really would’ve loved to see them together and seen them happy. Though I’m getting only some glimpses now (e5) and I’m not fully through the season yet so yeah there might be more. Still, I love Colson and may!

Mack and yo-yo broke up. like what?????? and then yo-yo also got with this other dude which ended up going horribly wrong she killed him well just really put them out of his misery. He swallowed a bat but he didn’t want to. it kind of just flew into him so yeah. but I did kind of like them together, but there was just a weird vibe because she kept calling him noble and then he would act a certain way… idk. He had it coming. (iykyk)

Mack being director is really cool, i want more!!! I like that he has a really close bond with Daisy. tremors <3 like Daisy was calling back into the lighthouse to land, and when they finally fully connected it, you could just kind of see it when he heard her voice. The relief, knowing that she’s back, hearing her voice. They’re very close and connected and I really like that. They got each other’s back, upside down, side to side, left, right, front too man. Maybe he kind of looks at her like a sibling.. idk. I would like to know, but I don’t know. If anything, it’s a best friend for sure. Kind of what he had with Bobby but better fs like wayyyyyyyyy better.

Bobby and Hunter man are so bad for each other. though I do love them together. I just I don’t know. Somethings up with them. I love them in general. Bobby’s hot and so cool. Hunter is hilarious but also a jack ass in a way and fairly attractive, him being funny, kind of helps it.

Deke is so fucking weird for having a girlfriend but then going to ‘work’ which is going into a simulation VR type of thing, it was like the framework but way better, and inside of it when he beats the bad guy, a door slides up and daisy appears but looking way sexier then usual like she does look sexy, but not in the way of having a lot more cleavage out, pressing up all against him, the leg 🦵…. yeah so it was weird. he also has a screen that shows what he’s saying and going through, how did the girlfriend not see this and know bro? She’s like a social media star, and so we get to see all of her story that she made. just uha. she ends up with the best friend that wasn’t actually deke’s best friend well he didn’t really know know him bc he is actually a undercover shield agent.

but mack saw the screen of what was happening in the framework and she’s slowly turned to deke and is was hilarious and horrible at the same time. His face was like in a grimace of ‘what the fuck and I’m about to punch you’ so deke said, I’ll give you 2% of the company if you don’t tell anyone. I feel like that 2% went higher fs but I don’t remember if it was actually 2% or not. Either way it should’ve been like a lot more. but Mack is protective of her, I really like that.

The acting in the show was really good. It’s phenomenal.

okay bye ✌️ love you <3

[the-firebird69]

KHAAAAAAN! - YouTube

And yes the max are kind of after our son but not to do stuff to him right now controlling the situation they say this is hilarious cuz you're not in control and everyone's messing up their plan and their money and a code and all sorts of stuff is messed up and he is a certain race they don't like and a certain giant race they don't like and they're called the nephilim although he's not the clan they still call him that and he is a certain kind and he's our kind it's like a few strikes there. In certain races they don't like and he's a mixed race of all of them and it's very sharp and they don't like that. Here's in a nutshell there after him silently and they try and bother him all the time it's very annoying and we have to stop them. We're gaining power soon we will be extremely powerful. And apparently Jen is going to train him. This is huge it's not saying this funny stuff to her so it's two mutants together and she never answers them. Till later it's completely clueless so just wait a minute someone always helps me with the answers that's you because I'm simply not going to tell you you stupid idiot. She had a good laugh today when he said that to her we heard of laughing in a room it's kind of loud. It's a nice healthy laugh and everyone said what was that and said he's asking her to check up on her. There's a few more things happening and John Riva Lord has had it he's going to get fired but my son says hiring him to do it to take one ship and everybody will try and compete without orders and stuff and they're going to try it, but using Starfleet command and that's the gig and the trick and Mike is going ahead with it and he gets it. It did a bunch of work today and our son didn't see it it's looking around since I don't see anything and see his idiots bothering me the other people are off doing jobs and monitoring them and picking them up it's a bunch of them picking them up there's a huge amount of work going on today and it's preliminary stuff and it's going to start everything off and it's going to be nice because it's so damn boring here watch something happen and they're going to get a stuff to him and the missing stuff and it's going to be better it's got a contract today and he's got the whole thing good he says and it is good now there's other stuff for doing and we're going to notify everybody now.

-we have 10 gigantic companies coming down here of ours that are newly ours and their construction companies Morrison condition is one of them floor Daniel no not Bechtel Turner construction and no not perini, and a few others that you might recognize and bar and bar is not one of them there's a few companies that are big and we have them there are others that are big that we don't truthfully but we have about 65% of the industry and we're trying to acquire the rest and we do own 95% of the equipment companies and factories and more. There are a couple more companies out west people might recognize but he can't think of it right now he went up against him a lot and bidding. They're coming down in the to do work and they're coming down to do a lot of work huge projects okay giant apartments and they won't let us do the upside down stuff and so nuts and they said we're nuts and they wouldn't let us do it with it right side up either and it's a stupid idea to form up the building so forms in the dirt and cast the roof it's like a solid very thick roof and then raise the building up using the concrete for the footers and the wall really for the wall I'm not sure if that would save time or take more time and you leave the you leave the forms in and you can attach stuff to him and somehow get the dirt out which should be able to suck out pretty quick there's two ways to do it and you can put forms on the inside and you could use a structure to hold them and we just reuse them an oil filter and using the forms on the inside as fast but not that fast use the dirt and just put forms in the dirt is extremely fast and the building would rise so we have to test it and the stupid idea works and it doesn't break the building because it forces the building up at the same time you just want your pressure it's almost effortless and it looks so damn weird you would not believe how stupid it looks with this building coming up out of the ground solid walls you just cut windows in I guess this is all you can put the pump house and it works another block outs, it pops up and some of the concrete springs out and you lock it up there on the form and it sits on the concrete for a couple days and then you fit the whole thing out the only problem is they said it's sitting on concrete that's not cured at least said no you lock it out and it's resting on a structural form and they said why the hell would you do that and it became obvious that they don't get it you're for me the building and you're raising the building using one set of forms that you don't have to move relocate or do anything else with and we got it up to eight stories and it's got eight stories below for a parking garage and we're going to use it and you can block out and have these big beans you just reuse the beans and it takes to take some part in a day while you're doing the finishes on the upstairs oil is curing even now he can't wait yeah you can you can take out most of the forms and it takes really half a day to cure so we did it and we tested it and it takes 1/3 of the time of a regular building and you have to put some bracing in and some steel in the building but it doesn't take long it comes out really well cuz it's like one piece even the foundation is kind of melded to the building and you have to put stuff in it so it comes together but that's another story so we figured out how to do it and there is nothing wrong with our son okay these things are crazy but if you make the system and you make the forms modular everything is the same size you can add and track the track to it easy enough just add another panel but really make it in 10 ft sections and you don't stress about it and somebody said they want one right now and it was actually Jason he said I could make apartments like crazy and you think it's a crappy technique when it's like very high tech.

Jason said the meeting he wants five city blocks as her son was showing him and he wants to have a viewing position and everything so they showed him where and he said here yes and we gave him the price tell him how many inhabitants it says can you have more than 80 stories but you're going to have that many below in there our son says it's not really necessary you can just add to it and we said okay you just keep pumping it up like Plato wait a minute does that make sense yes the way to get those in there so we decided something there's a way to do it you pump it up and you put the locks in but then the windows would have to be in already so you'd have to block a section structurally and how did you do that well I figured out how to do it and you just keep pumping it and putting a section in pumping it there's a way to do it and you're right so we know how to do that and it's a technique and he said no way so they go up to like 80 stories and if you wider like about half mile wide and then they go up 80 more and they go to 80 storey lifts and the wall will get thinner no and then you go to about a maximum of 300 stories which is about 4,000 ft high it's almost a mile and he liked it and we said we can build about 10 cities in about 3 days all at the same time they go up and they come out of nowhere and even considered to be like a God. They're all about maybe about a mile almost a mile and he said no s*** and he said now so over there and we're getting ready to build and we're doing it with one of our sons favorite building construction companies floor Daniel cuz they wouldn't let him in and this is going to be a huge achievement for him and us and me and Hera and Freya and several others are helping design silently it's spring Castle hardcastle obviously and Duke Nukem Blockbuster and I'm not telling him how he did the lift after the lift but he will have to find out and we know what to do with the cold joint too

Thor Freya

They're arresting tons of these people here for tons of crimes, it's the real one for tonight

Wow this is awesome we're getting a lot of movement we're getting a lot of help and we're building a lot of stuff and we're doing a lot of things and we're also getting their weirdos out of our hair and we're getting to the meat and potatoes and we're doing lots of work and I love it it's awesome I got Mac on the line so I'm going to take it

Duke Nukem Blockbuster

I know what his role is he started saying when I just keep going with it and you're thinking in it anyways but he knows how to do and be our technique and it's different this is awesome it's a new way of doing up down and it's really down up if you want to think of something you can do that and you can dig down and drop it down in now because you can dig the dirt out in the middle of a huge bunker and just build the walls and the Indian Castle floor in and the roof he said why don't we do that and you can do that without doing the funky design sort of because you have the forms on the outside edge and you just drop the forms down as it drops in the same why the hell do that cast it and then drop it cast It drop It cast it drop it then they said this why would you do that in the first place so I don't know if people would see where it is I said yeah that's one problem but you could you can make a tunnel and suck it up suck the dirt out they said okay you have to have openings in somewhere like you can do it in the top so then started to say something you just keep dropping it down and what you're doing now is they support it and they build under it and when you say is you just suck it all out at the same time and it slides down so the last thing I'm thinking it comes up with one piece it can go down with one piece

There's a number of people who think he's nuts it is like building bunkers there's a way to keep the foundations normal sized and it's a way to keep the buildings going up but really we're going to say what's going on here

Frank Castle hardcastle

I said the last part but we're going to get back to it Thor Freya

[hotluncheddie]

steve and robin are drunk. it’s about 6pm, they started at 3 and they’re having a blast! upside down shit is over! they’re best friends! young, dumb and having fun baby!!

'this was a great idea, its great, i love being drunk' steve's listening to robin's rambling, nodding and smiling. she's so funny and cool, god he loves her so much!

there's a knock at the door and steve rolls off of the couch, stumbling to his feet, very very elegantly thank you. 'steve steeeeeve no this is the best part, watch steve. watch look how hot she is!' robin is pointing at the screen but steve has no idea what film is on... the actress does look kind of hot tho. 'you're so right.' he tells her and she just nods over and over, eyes not leaving the screen.

steve rips the door open, ‘eddie!! hey robin eddies here how cool is that?’ god this is great! eddies here! steve loves eddie! well you know not like that... not yet...

‘let’s goooooo’ robin shouts from the lounge.

‘party time is it stevie?’ eddie smiles rocking back and forward a little on his heels, steve can't stop staring at him. wow. eddie!

'...can i come in or.. or is it steve and robin only time?' gasping steve processes what eddie is saying. reaching to grip him by the wrist, pulling him inside 'of course you can come in eddie! robin put some weird movie on i don't understand so you have to come save me'

steve doesn't spot the surprised smile that brightens eddies face at the contact. or the way his heart is squeezing at the free sort of happiness emanating from definitely wasted steve harrington. 'of course your highness'

steve giggles at that, dragging eddie to where robin is now sprawled over the recliner, her glass of wine back in hand. steve picks up his own glass and offers it to eddie. 'were drinking wine to be classy and because robin likes vampires now.'

'interview with a vampire read very gay steve' robin has her eyes on the movie still, lips staines red.

'i'm good, angel, i gotta drive back in a bit' eddie pushes the glass back towards steve who blushes and drops on the sofa. 'and i couldn't agree more buckley. now, not judging, but is there a reason you've gone on this very classy bender on a thursday?' eddie takes in the couple wine bottles on the table, sitting next to steve, close enough for their knees to brush.

'we work retail. this is basically saturday. we don't get weekends. time isn't real.' robin states pointing an accusing finger at eddie, her hair totally flat on one side and cheeks rosy.

they go on but steve has lost track of the conversation, he only knows it's happening because he can see eddies lips moving. they're nice lips, eddie likes to say nice things to steve. steve likes that. he likes eddie. he drains his glass, leaning forward to refill it and slumping back to look at eddie again. he's a little closer now, his brain points out. nice.

'you gonna be okay stevie? i gotta go have dinner with wayne, i only came by to drop you this.' eddie pulls a tape from inside his jacket and holds it up, tapping steve in the nose with it. steve giggles again.

'mmm yeah we'll be okay, off tomorrow, couch is comfy to sleep on.' steve wiggles his eyebrows and snuggles down more into the sofa, as if to prove his point. he beams as eddie laughs at him.

'metal?' steve asks, drinking more and holding the tape up close to his face. why are the words blurry? ah! wine! that's why. yes.

'some, not all. mostly just songs i think you'll like' eddie is looking at him and if steve was more sober he might see how nervous eddie is.

mostly steve just sees how pink his lips are as his tongue swipes over them and how big and sparkly his eyes are. always so sparkly, how does he do that?!

'you’re so pretty eddie' steve can't help it. eddie has to know, its, its important. so important that eddie munson knows just how pretty he is. how pretty steve thinks he is.

'pretty eddie. pretty hair, pretty eyes.' steve looks all over eddies face, trying to take it all in.

eddies eyes widen and his cheeks dust pink. there he goes again, steve thinks, being pretty! he can't take it!

'god, harrington you can't just say that' eddie looks at him incredulous, but smiling.

'ugh don't call me that, and i can say whatever i want. its my house and my wine party, thank you very much.' steve sips his drink, going for huffy but he's too drunk to really care, quickly going back to looking at eddie from his slumped position in the couch.

'apologies princess. how about this? call me tomorrow and if you still think I'm pretty we can talk about it then, kay?' eddie eyes are soft, if a little guarded not quite as sparkly.

'mkay, dunno why i'd stop just because it's tomorrow tho.' steve frowns a little, looking into his glass. eddies always been pretty.

'i see. well, i gotta go now stevie but i'll see you soon yeah? you'll look after robin and get some sleep?' eddie tucks some hair behind steves ear and oh. oh. that's nice. sleeve preens, blinking slowly, nodding.

he twists on the sofa, watching as eddie leaves with a little wave. listens as the rev of his engine grows faint into the distance. leaving the room quiet apart from robin's soft snores.

'tomorrow' steve whispers, before he goes to get glasses of water ready for them both and promptly passes out onto the sofa. face smushed into the pillow that smells most like eddie.

...

woken abruptly by the shrill ring of the phone, eddie stumbles into the living room, noting that the clock reads 9am. who the fuck would ring at 9 in the fucking morning?

he rips the phone away from the receiver. 'yes?'

'hey pretty boy.'

‘oh.’