#put the toy in the fridge not freezer!!!

[littlecutiexox]

Pro tip for this heatwave, put your glass toy in the fridge then place it under your boobs

[thesaintelectric]

eskew is a good podcast because ive never seen david drawn with the intention of him looking anything other than pathetic & miserable

[dabisbratz]

been fantasizin! — izuku midoriya x male reader

w.c: 2.1k

WARNING: heat cycles, bunny quirk, ear-pulling, creampie (x2), toy use, overstimulation, manhandling, dacryphilia, soft dom!izuku, praise, kissing, drool/spit, body worship, dirty talk, breeding mention, use of the word “pussy” as a synonym for (ass)hole, amab reader

“Honey?” There’s a soft click of the front door as it unlocks, a tall pro-hero setting foot inside with a few grocery bags in hand. The penthouse is homely, not at all too large for it’s two inhabitants, with a nicely decorated living room and fully applianced kitchen. The kitchen island outlooks the living-room, and the living-room outlooks the balcony, with a pretty, twinkling view of Musutafu’s bustling city. Izuku couldn’t have asked for a better home, a better boyfriend, a better life. He fought hard for it, anyway. “I’m back!”

The home is draped in domesticity, well lived in with a few misplaced remotes and a blanket scattered across the pleather couch.

He can’t find you anywhere, not in the kitchen making a snack, not hiding behind the couch, with floppy ears that match your hair and give you away. Not on the balcony, where you like to lean too far out for your viewing pleasure and his dismay. He frowns, freckled cheeks puffed out in a pout and eyes dimly lit. It’s unusual for his bunny to stay where he is, typically he waits by the door for his boyfriend's return, ears bouncing excitedly the second the door is unlocked. There’s only really one place you could be, but he has a few things to put away first.

The groceries end up where they shouldn’t be, apples in the freezer and thinly cut beef stacked inside the fridge, but Midoriya just can’t focus when his day has been knocked off its path like this. He slams the fridge door much harder than intended, the stainless steel shaking in his grasp and nearly threatening to fall. It doesn’t, but the display almost has Izuku panicking again, sights set on two things at one.

So he makes his way to the bedroom.

It’s shared between the two of you, a large, soft, and warm mattress with even softer blankets (you picked them out), and some nice blackout curtains when city lights ended up too overwhelming. The door creaks quietly, nothing compared to the sound that doesn’t seem to be quieting down any time soon.

You’re grinding your cock down against the midsized plushie Izuku had won you on one of your first dates back in highschool, ruining the soft fur with your precum. It must be because it smells just like him, having previously been wearing one of his hoodies, and you’d referred to the bear as Izuku Jr. It’s wet and sticky, almost like the air in the room, which fills with desperate moans as your hips rock back and forth against the plush. Izuku can see the bounce of your ass as you rock it back against a silicone toy, slippery with lube and dribbling onto the bed. He frowns.

Your heat cycle must have started while he was away. His poor boy, his poor baby, was left alone to fend for himself, fucking himself against nothing but a fake for the last few hours. Your pretty thighs must be aching and tired by now, on fire and sore, wrapped around a teddy bear when it could’ve been him. Izuku sighs, shedding himself of his jacket before rolling up his sleeves, and slowly padding over to the bed.

He’s careful not to tear you away, you get very territorial of your ‘nest’, instead tracing his fingertips up your calves, the back of your thighs, the swell of your ass. It’s only when he gives a sharp squeeze to your backside do you notice his presence. Your big ears twitch, swaying along as your head whips back to finally register the man beside you. You can’t say much, throat hoarse and tired from cries that fell on deaf ears, but the look on your face is enough for Izuku to scoop you up and cup your face.

“Don’t stop ‘cause of me,” He whispers against your lips, gently scraping his nails behind your ears. You keen against his touch, chasing his palm until his freckled thumb is slipped into your mouth. You can feel a scar that runs across his thumb, similar to the veins in his dick. “Cockdumb bunny, you’re so pretty like this. How’d this happen, sweetpea?”

You moan around his thumb, suckling and rutting your hips against his clothed thigh, which is already starting to collect sticky stains of pre. There’s a small tug on your ear, hard enough to get your lips to pop off his finger until you’re looking up at him, eyes sparkly and wet. Izuku wipes your drying tears with his big hands, then tugs harder. “I know, too much thinking gets you riled up. Just need an answer, honey, then we can take care of your needy hole.”

‘Zuku’s hands are always better. When your brain isn’t fully online he’s there, all smiles and big hands to touch you just right. He slides his hands up your torso, actively avoiding your cock as he smears the cum on your bellybutton up to your chest, massages it into your hard nipples while you tremble in his hands. You fist the sleeves of his shirt, right where the neckline meets shoulder, pulling him in closer until his breath ghosts i’ve your nipples. You can’t take the lingering touches, you need something constant. Something intense.

But instead you whine, too needy to form any actual complete sentences or thoughts.

“Thought of— wanna be good. Need— M’a good boy. ‘Zuku. Need you.” It’s more jumbled than anything, a pathetic noise leaving your body as he pushes you back down against your plush, dildo discarded somewhere by the headboard. Such a silly thing, you got too far in your head and really thought some silicone was good enough to satiate your needs.

“Just stayed sweet for me? Thought about the stretch of my cock inside you— your mouth, your ass?” Midoriya responds absentmindedly, strong jaw clenched as he lifts you up by the hips, keeping you bent over until your face is smashed into the sheets, bunny ears alert and twitching as he rubs them soothingly. He tuts, sliding his hands down to your ass and spreading the thick cheeks apart wide. He’s met with your overstimulated hole, sloppy and needy as it winks up at him. “Or is this a cunt, honey? Made for breeding? It already looks like you’re gushing.”

He’s partly grateful you’re not positioned to face him, a sharp shade of red dusting his matured cheeks as you nod and press your ass down into his palms. Your thighs are sticky and soaked with lube, must’ve been leaking out of you since you’d gotten up to greet him. Your voice sounds whiny and high, ears bouncing with each downward thrust you make, bouncing against his hands like you’re trying to fuck yourself on his cock, despite it not being out yet.

“ ‘Zuku, ‘Zuku, ‘Zuku,” It’s a mantra of sorts, loud and rushing blood straight down south to Izuku’s stiff cock. You can’t think of anything but him, the stretch of your entrance as he pushes himself impossibly deep into your guts, the feeling of his hand supporting your tummy so he can feel himself sliding in and out of you, the praise that leaves his lips when he’s shooting a load into you, keeping you still on his dick until it finally stops spurting. “Ohh.”

“I think it is, baby,” Izuku purrs, letting you grind against his cock for contact when he removes the warmth of his hands, undoing his fly to free himself from his boxers. He’ll start off quick for now, just to get you coherent again, then fuck you nice and slow, how you deserve it, once you’ve had a load to nurse. He lines himself up quickly, tracing your entrance with the fat head of his dick. “All mine, right? Barely fits, even after all that training you’ve been doing. C’mere, honey. Feel.”

His other hand takes yours to trail it down your hips and past your ass, dipping into the crevice of your ass until your fingertips are pressed against your hole, dipping into the entrance as his cock is slapped against it. He’s right, it barely fits, fat and curved perfectly, you shed a few tears when he slips inside, your hole stretching around his length and swallowing him up despite the intrusion.

“Just gotta fuck it right, don’t I, pretty? Gotta use it nice and sweet, get you all pliant and dizzy just how you like it,” You’re nodding, lips parted and panting loudly against the sheets, drooling onto them and ultimately getting it all over your cheek, but you don’t care. Izuku’s cock is right there, inches away from being inside you, from breeding you and using you like you deserve.

“Did you know you have a really pretty hole, baby? Just as cute as your face!”

He sounds lewd, but it’s genuine. His dimpled smile is enough to tell you that, you can hear it in his voice, even if it’s a little ragged and breathless. He’s rambling again, something about pumping you full until you can’t do anything but twitch against the mattress, but it doesn’t matter. Not when his cock is pushing inside you, not when your own is starting to spurt out rope after rope of cum once he’s inside.

Your hole convulses around him, sucking him in deeper and deeper until it’s clenching around the base of his cock, his curly, dark pubes peeking out from his pants and resting against your ass. He uses you like a toy, rocks you up and down while you ride the wave of your millionth orgasm tonight, tongue rolled out of your mouth and ears droopy against your cheeks. Your pants rival the sound of his balls against your ass, a harsh smacking sound as he increases the speed of his strokes, groaning when you claw at the sheets for support.

“Fuck, you’ll take all my cum, won't you? Yeah, think it'll catch? All this hot, sticky cum inside you?”

Your ass crashes against him, shining under the dimly lit bedside lamp. Bunnies do what they do best, bouncing on and off his cock until you’re delirious, tears streaming down your handsome face. Izuku barely needs to touch your cock, instead meeting your bounces half way while he grabs your wrists, bending them behind your back for leverage. You sob, a pathetic, loud noise that has Izuku groaning soon after, and he knows you’re crying now.

Midoriya shoots deep inside you, thick, creamy ropes of cum pooling inside you just to seep out your puffy, abused hole. It spills over the sides of his cock, dropping down your thighs and your toes curl, a happy sound leaving your throat since you’re finally full.

But Izuku wants one more, just for safekeeping.

He spoons up the cum with his fingers, pushing it back into your hole alongside his sensitive cock, his head falling forward as he melts into you. He gets it now, the neediness, he wants to fuck you full, feel you tighten and squeeze down on his cock because you can’t take it, praise you for being such a good, warm hole for him and his big dick. He’s just as desperate as you, fucking the cum deeper against that sensitive bundle of nerves that makes you lose your voice.

“Say thank you, bunny. Aren’t you grateful for my cock? My cum inside you like you’ve always wanted? Fuck, I love this hole. Don’t forget your manners, baby.”

You’re responding before you can process the question, letting him manhandle you up and down on his cock, your overstimulated hole struggling to keep up with his pace. You'd fall flat on your face if it weren’t for his supportive hand, spread on your tummy and pressing into that delicious bump of his cock every time it fucks up into you.

“Th—ank you, thank you, ‘Zuku, love your cum n’my bunnyboy pussy.” And— oh, he never gets used to it, your sweet voice repeating his words with the promise of a few pats to the head, a scratch behind the ear, a kiss to the forehead. Izuku’s emerald eyes roll back in his head, his thrusts sloppy and unsteady as his balls tighten.

He’s cumming again before he knows it, the familiar clamp of your hole making his hips stutter as you cum too, collecting glob after glob of his cum inside you, feeling it stick to your gooey walls.

“Stay— stay ‘nside.” Your words are slurred, alert bunny ears now limp and tired as you lick your lips, shimmying down on Izuku’s spent cock. There’s a slight bias behind you, but the man doesn’t protest, instead grabbing you by the hips to resettle into a comfortable, spooning position, his hot skin already cooling by the second.

He’ll change later, maybe fuck you against the shower door if you can get up, but for now he’s content with holding you, even if his clothes are sticky and damp. His arm is behind your head, earning a small nuzzle as you sigh into his forearm.

If there’s one thing he’s sure of, it’s his love for you.

[tddyhyck]

ice cream thief [ l.dh ]

pairing ⇢ perv roommate!hyuck x afab!reader (mentioned other nct members + karina)

word count ⇢ 12.8k

synopsis ⇢ someone has been eating haechan's favorite ice cream so he decides to put a hidden camera in the kitchen and living room thinking it's a shared space it shouldn't invade anyone's privacy... right?

warnings ⇢ 18+, dubcon, invasion of privacy, filming with and without consent, voyeurism (hyuck is a peeping tom), exhibitionism, panty stealing, toys, multiple orgasms, nipple play (m & f receiving) , cum eating, oral (f receiving), switch but mainly sub!hyuck, reader has a bdsm relationship with johnny, yuta, and jaehyun, switch but mainly dom!reader, handcuffs, unprotected sex, cream pie, hyuck is a little bi icon, lots of masturbation (m & f), excessive talk of legend of zelda (SORRY), anal (not super detailed), use of good boy & pervert, slapping, overstimulation, mentioned (bdsm, bondage, whips, rope/shibari, threesomes, mxm, scissoring, spit roasting, getting high, double penetration, marking) pls let me know if i missed anything

playlist ⇢ creep_radiohead / obsession_sky ferreira / nothings going to hurt you baby_cigarettes after sex / wet nightmare_bibi / i wanna be your slave_måneskin / use me_bill withers / sweet_cigarettes after sex / guys my age_hey violet / sexy silk_cumkitten / pussy is god_king princess

a/n ⇢ i'm trying to get better at making the reader as general as possible please let me know any ways i can improve!

masterlist

“no one is stealing your goddamn ice cream,” you groan, rolling your eyes. you’re currently having a “house meeting” in the kitchen, more like you and your roommates get yelled at by your other roommate haechan for 30 minutes. you’re sitting at the end of the island beside jaemin and karina who is leaning next to the wall while haechan stands across from the counter in front of the fridge waving an empty box around. 

“well, where the fuck are my double vanilla yogurt bars going?” he says waving the box around for dramatics. 

“who the fuck wants double vanilla ass yogurt ice cream bars,” jaemin argues. 

“literally we have chocolate, strawberry,” jaemin gags, “even cones, why would we want double vanilla,” karina quips while you roll your eyes. 

“because it’s the best ice cream in the world,” he groans, running his hands through his hair. 

“yeah maybe to old white dudes,” karina says, making you and jaemin giggle. 

“listen i get it, no one wants to fess up. you’re embarrassed, feeling guilty even,” you scoff at his dramatics. “but just tell me between friends, i will forgive you if you buy me a new box.” no one says anything, just stares across the counter at haechan. “god i hate all of you. i swear i’m moving out.”

“finally, let me know if you need help packing,” you smile as he storms off middle finger raised in your direction. 

“so which one of you ate the ice cream?” karina whispers, you and jaemin shake your heads hearing haechan's door slam. 

“swear i didn't, i would probably have the strawberry before double vanilla,” he grimaces. 

“same, i would just go without, who wants double vanilla anyways? i bet he just doesn’t remember eating them.” you laugh. 

haechan sat in his room sulking and determined to figure out who was eating his precious ice cream. this wasn’t the first time it happened and it had only gotten worse. he pondered which one of his housemates would eat his ice cream. 

karina was in her green juice phase and probably wasn’t eating ice cream but if she was she would want the "healthiest" option which were the double vanilla yogurt bars. she couldn’t be marked off the list. 

jaemin would definitely eat the double vanilla bars. especially when he would just open the freezer and grab anything that didn’t have a strawberry pink label. haechan grumbled to himself pulling his fingers through his hair. 

and you, you would totally eat his ice cream just to spite him. you would probably throw away an uneaten bar just to annoy him, give them out to delivery men, or offer them to your annoying friends. 

he furiously typed into his search bar. “how to stop roommates from stealing food.”

he scrolls reading over the bulleted list. 

write your name on everything 

that wouldn’t work, jaemin would just read it and ignore it.

hide the food in an unlikely place

where can he hide ice cream unless he got a mini freezer and that just seemed like too much work. 

douse the food in hot sauce, chili powder, etc. 

wouldn’t that just ruin the food for him?

install cameras to present evidence of the theft

bingo

haechan had plenty of access to cameras, the tech, and the knowledge to install nanny cams. his it major finally came to his aid during his time of woe. 

he made a plan, go to the tech lab and talk to kun about security cameras. he can play it off that it’s for a friend, his mom, or maybe his roommates wanted to feel safer. then he could install them on thursday morning when everyone was in class. then he would wait for someone to eat his ice cream and catch them in the act. foolproof right?

“so wait, why do you need cameras again?” kun asked, rummaging through a box of wires. 

“it’s for a friend they asked me since they knew i was majoring in it,” haechan says nonchalantly, pushing his hands in his pockets. 

“oh cool, you said home security right?” haechan nodded, moving to the side after kun got up with various wires in his hands. he followed kun to another part of the tech lab. 

“just don’t set them up in locker rooms. some dude did that a few years ago and i helped him pick them out. god, i felt sick after.” 

“god no, just home security, said he has some weird roommates or something,” haechan shook his head. watching over kun’s shoulder as he scrolled through some tech website. 

“okay, i would go with one of these if it’s just basic home security. they have an app for easy access and pretty good quality cameras,” kun says, clicking on one of the images before scrolling through. haechan nodded, eyes dancing over the webpage. 

“sounds good to me, can you order them?” kun nodded, adding the items to the cart. 

“does he need any wifi extenders?” haechan shook his head looking over the total price. still cheaper than a mini freezer. “i’ll let you know when they come in.”

“thanks, dude, i’ll venmo you,” haechan says walking away. 

“do you need help setting them up?”

“nope.”

the cameras came in faster than haechan even expected, he hadn’t even gotten the chance to restock his ice cream bars to set up the trap. he waited for the perfect time when everyone was out of the apartment in class, studying, or doing whatever haechan didn’t care enough to ask. 

he took to unboxing the set of five cameras, one for the kitchen right above the fridge, one diagonal from the fridge to get the full angle of the theft, one in the living room facing the couch and the hall, and one for a wide angle of the living room. he had one to spare so he decided to put it in the corner of his room to see if anyone was snooping around. 

it took him about an hour to set up the two in the kitchen, fiddling back and forth on his phone and with the cameras to perfect the angle. walking back and forth to make sure the entire walk from the hall would be caught and no denying could happen. 

one camera was hidden between some old cereal boxes he and jaemin had used for a project that they never threw away. the other was between the bread maker karina had stopped using two weeks after getting it and was just collecting dust and the protein powder. 

it took him about an hour more for the two in the living room, making sure the camera was facing the couch fully because that would definitely be where the culprit would enjoy the sweet treat. 

the camera was tilted slightly to hide nicely on the corner of the dvd shelf. the other was squeezed snuggly between some half-dead plants on the window sill, viewing the full kitchen, part of the dining table, living room, and the hall. 

haechan was lucky his room was on one side of the house and his three roommates were down the opposite hall. so it was unlikely one of them would come down his hall unless it was for a shower or to piss. 

he finally fiddled with the one in his room more for fun but he thought of the possibilities of “accidentally” filming while fucking some hot chick he brought home or even the occasional big bulky dude he would find on some field or court who wanted to experiment when he needed to get fucked. 

he didn’t want to be a creep and it wouldn’t be like he’d share the footage if it happened but it would be a nice bonus. getting to relive a good fucking on some shitty camera like a perv. 

he wouldn’t openly admit to being a pervert, but he was. he often got off on being watched and watching other people, that’s why he liked going to the gym, not for the workout or health benefits, but the view of some hot girl sweating while doing squats or the best part seeing hot guys in the locker rooms and if he was lucky getting to shower beside them peaking at their cocks hanging heavily between their legs next to him. 

he loved the thrill of jerking off in the corner of the showers waiting for some muscled beefcake to come in and embarrass him before cursing and manhandling him. his fantasies never quite came true but that didn’t stop him from releasing onto the tile below him while he tweaked his nipples and the water hit his chest. 

haechan often found himself in these “compromising” positions. like the time he hid in the closet of some frat dude's room while he watched his friends, jeno and jaemin, fuck some sorority girl. 

he didn’t mean to get high and roam the house ending up in some closet, but what was he gonna do when they came in and spit-roasted her right through the slits in the door. so he shut up as best he could and jerked off while peaking out. he hated to admit being jealous of his friends and the girl but he couldn’t help it. 

he also didn’t mean to listen in when his housemates brought someone around and didn’t realize he was there. he would stand in the hall watching jaemin fuck some cheerleader until she was brainless or karina bringing over some girl to “study” but he watched them scissor for like 20 minutes and they never noticed. you however never brought anyone home at least that he knew of. 

he’d heard stories from his friends about how you were apparently into being dominated by older men, but haechan didn’t fully believe it. at least not the stories his older friends johnny, yuta, and jaehyun would tell of you. how you liked to be whipped and cuffed to the bed while johnny edged you, or how yuta would tie intricate ropes around you bending you into pretzel-like positions before making you cry, and jaehyun boasted about making you cum some insane amount until you passed out on his cock. you were too annoying and mean to be submissive, and far too uptight to be into adventurous casual sex. 

the stories did get him off though just like viewing his other roommates in secret, the thought of his little prude roommate being into nasty sex had gotten him hard. after hearing all about it he excused himself to the bathroom and came in his fist embarrassingly fast. 

it didn't take long to start getting notifications of motion most of the time being someone arriving home or leaving. he gets strangely excited at the prospect of catching someone at the fridge but every time it has been for something lame like eggs or soda. he had started to worry about the house eating habits when everyone was only eating eggs, popcorn, and frozen food. 

by the third day he’s grown accustomed to the notifications on his phone of detected movement. it's not as exciting when it’s the fifth time of the day and he knows it will probably just be jaemin making toast. but he opens it quickly waiting for the app to load. 

before he sees you sitting on the couch, knees to your chest twirling something in your mouth. he grins convinced he had caught the ice cream thief. he started his car ready to rush home and catch you in the act, that is until you pull it out of your mouth. squinting bringing his phone closer to make sure it is his ice cream his eyes widen when he realizes it’s not his ice cream but a dildo of some sort. 

you wouldn't, there's no way you would in the living room. his mouth hung open watching you bring the toy back to your lips. he was surprised by the camera quality when he could see your spit dribbling down the toy and collecting at the corners of your mouth. 

he should have closed his phone and put it on silent never to be thought of again, but he can’t look away, he knows it’s wrong but he can’t stop staring. 

he gaped when you opened your knees and moved one hand between your legs flipping your skirt up revealing some light blue panties. he’s sure he’s seen them in your hamper or when you accidentally left them in the wash that one time. he watched as your hand slithered between your legs pressing against your heat, squinting in surprise seeing a dark spot growing under your hand. 

his eyes were scanning quickly trying to take in the entire scene watching you with one hand over your panties and the other swirling what he assumed to be silicone between your lips. he can’t believe you of all people would be getting off in the living room knowing any of your roommates could walk in. little miss goody two shoes had a thing for exhibitionism he smirked. 

you moved the toy from your lips, a line of spit still connected until the toy slid over your panties. he gasped when you moved your other hand from between your legs to pull your shirt up tits falling out. 

he had seen you naked a few times completely accidentally of course, not that he didn’t keep the image in his head permanently. one time when he walked into the bathroom while you were changing before turning around swiftly and attempting to avert his eyes while you cursed him out. it was your fault for not locking the door. 

or when johnny’s frat had a pool party and your swimsuit came untied during a game of chicken. nipples hard and perked from the cool water and right in front of his face. he recalls the embarrassment that flooded your face when you realized before your hands covered up quickly. he had jerked off later to the thought of fucking your tits. 

he remembers how he couldn’t get your cute nipples off his brain for like a week after. it pissed him off how you walked around the house braless, nipples pointed right in his face. you were also the bane of his existence you were so annoying and difficult, but so fucking hot but you pissed him off with your bratty attitude. 

but he loved the way you scolded him and grabbed and pulled his hair when he went too far, or when you yelled at him and called him names with an angry tone in your voice and pout on your lips all because he had spoiled the new season of stranger things. 

he shook his head before pressing his palm to his face and moving his glasses to rub his eyes. he should turn it off. there's no going back if he keeps watching, but he just couldn’t look away. he had to make a decision and he did, taping the full-screen icon in the corner, turning off his car, and sitting back to watch. 

he wished it was his hand pinching your nipples, making you sigh and bite your lip. he was too busy staring at them to notice you press a button on your toy before pressing it to your clit and grinding against it. his eyes trailed down when he noticed the movement. he felt his mouth water when the darkness grew in your panties.

you had to stop yourself from letting the feeling take over, wanting to be filled up before you came. you pulled your toy away and moved your hand from your nipples to pull your panties to the side. you could feel how sticky and wet you were. you wished it was someone else between your legs a warm body fucking you open. 

haechan’s mouth fell open with your pussy on display. he watched your hole flutter just begging to be filled up. he could feel his cock pressing against his jeans as you slid the toy between your folds leaning your head back against the couch. it was smaller than him from what he could tell. why was he even comparing his dick to his least favorite roommate's dildo? 

his mind was just playing horny tricks on him while you were using one hand to pull your panties aside and the other to slip your blue toy into your cunt. haechan watched your mouth open and eyes close. somewhere in the back of his perverted mind, he wished the camera had sound.

he watched in delight when he saw your toes curling against the cushions and your hand speeding up between your thighs. you took it so well spreading your legs wider and mouth hanging open. he knew you sounded good and he could practically hear you whining. he jumped when your eyes met his through the screen he could swear you could see him watching. 

he needed to shut his phone off and throw it out his car window but he also wanted you to know he was watching like a nasty peeping tom. he kept watching the way your eyes glazed over, your hips rutting up to meet your flicking wrist. 

he didn’t realize but he had started grinding against his hand pressed between his legs. he felt so fucking pathetic in the library parking lot unzipping his jeans and pulling his cock out. and anyone walking by could see his windows weren’t nicely tinted but cheaply tinted and that just made it more exhilarating. 

he continued staring at his phone jerking his terribly hard cock in his fist whining wantonly in the quiet car. he tried to match his fist with yours, bringing his hand to the tip when you pulled out before pressing back into your cunt and he would fuck up into his own fist. he felt his forehead growing sweaty and he watched you slide deeper into the couch, knees bending harshly and pressing into your chest. 

you looked so desperate thrusting your hips up and your brow furrowed concentrating on your incoming orgasm. haechan was wondering if you were close because god he already was briefly removing his hand to spit in his palm and coat his aching cock.

he looked up for a second sensing movement to his right, watching some group of guys walk by his car not noticing the movement right under their noses. it only made him harder if that was possible reaching down grabbing his balls squeezing tightly making him hold his breath. 

his eyes focused back on you but you were slowing down and he was hoping you weren’t stopping. were you into edging like johnny had told him? he watched intently massaging his balls breathing in through his nose and out through his mouth waiting for your next move. 

you pulled the toy out of your cunt and he whined when a wet glob of slick dripped out not to mention the wetness coating the toy that you were bringing back to your lips. he brought his hand back to grip his dick, holding the base and pressing it down between his legs before letting it slap up against his stomach with a hiss, while you cleaned off your toy. 

he watched you stand up and slip your panties off your legs,  what he wouldn’t do to steal those and shove them down his throat? maybe he could sneak them from your dirty laundry. 

you turned around bending over the back of the couch making him whine, a perfect view of your ass bent at the best angle, cunt still glistening below your tight asshole. his glasses were slipping down his nose from sweat but he didn’t care especially when you brought your toy to rub over your pussy. smearing your slick over your holes making a wet sticky mess that he would die to clean up. 

he’d started thrusting into his fist again trying to be patient and slow like you were. bringing the toy to press against your rim while your head turned hoping to catch a glimpse of your taut hole being teased. he watched you push the limit seeing the way your toes curled when you tried pushing in dry, your cunt clenching at the pressure above. 

you whimpered but he wouldn’t know that just watched the way you bit your lip before bringing the toy to your cunt and pressing in fully arching your back when you had buried it fully between your legs. he stared at the way your thighs flexed and met the base of your toy as it filled you up. 

he could even see drool starting to fall from your open mouth. he wanted to hold back and wait to cum but you just looked so delicious he couldn’t help his hand speeding up. his whines raised in pitch as he pumped his girth it definitely was not as good as your pussy probably felt. 

his own pleasure was distracting him, making his eyes close and he had to practically pry them open to watch you again. he didn’t know how close you were, only you did. 

if he had noticed the way your head fell forward on the cushions and legs tried to squeeze together and wrist flicking lazier. he would have known but he didn’t. he didn’t see it coming when you came with a silent cry, legs tightening, ass shivering. he didn’t realize until you were cumming. hadn’t heard you whimper “i’m gonna cum.” into your palm. 

he came with you completely accidentally, pulling his hand away too late, cum already spurting out before he could stop it, hips twitching along with his dick. he whimpered bringing his hand back to milk his cock, thick cum leaking onto his sweatshirt sleeve, and steering wheel. an embarrassing amount pooled on his stomach as his breathing evened out. 

bringing his attention back to his phone he watched you pull the toy from your cunt another thick gush of slick dripped down hitting the couch below you. he hoped you didn’t do the considerate thing and clean it up but he knew you would. 

you laid the toy beside you bringing your fingers between your legs and toes curling when you made contact with your swollen cunt. his mouth watered when you dipped your fingers in to collect the juices and lifted it to your mouth to suck them clean. 

once you both had caught your breath he dug around in his glove box for napkins swiping at the drying cum on his sweatshirt and steering wheel. you were cleaning up your own mess and he left his phone open catching a glimpse of your wobbly legs when you got up. 

eventually he closed his phone, guilt taking over him, he just watched his roommate get off. it definitely wasn’t the first time or the last so the feeling drifted away quickly. the idea of installing a camera in your room even crossed his sick and twisted mind but he knew that was too far. 

he was tucking his softening length into his pants when a banging at his window startled him looking up to see shotaro and yangyang banging on the glass. he clutched his chest after swiftly zipping his jeans before unlocking the doors and they got in. 

“what are you doing bombarding me during my meditation?”

“you said you were leaving like 30 minutes ago, the fuck are you still doing here?” yangyang questioned from the back seat. 

“didn’t you have some meeting or something?” shotaro questioned with a smile.

“shit,” he did have a meeting at the caf about a group project that he was now almost 20 minutes late for. 

“did you get distracted or something your car smells like you fucked?” yangyang said laughing as he leaned forward between the two front seats. 

“and if i did you’d be jealous so i can’t talk about it.” 

despite having watched you cum in the living room via camera nothing about your dynamic changed. that was something haechan was good at distancing his peeping adventures and the people he actually peeped on. he didn’t find it awkward to be around them later even after seeing their most intimate moments. he did steal a pair of your dirty panties though but you didn’t seem to notice yet, at least that he was aware. 

and just as expected he did watch you again not even a week later a notification lighting up his phone hoping again to find the ice cream culprit but to see you swinging your legs open bringing some type of purple wand vibrator between your legs in the most erotic way. head dropping back as you upped the vibrations, stomach tensing when you pulled the toy away, hips canting up to chase the feeling.  

he snuck off to the bathroom of his job and came while he set his phone up on the sink and watched himself in the mirror. 

it seemed to be almost like clockwork. you waited until you were sure everyone was out and you’d slip into the living room spreading out with some toy or your fingers and going to town. and like clockwork, haechan would open his phone as if on cue to see you putting on a show for him and he’d grip his cock and jerk off. able to cum when he started recognizing when you were close. 

he did save all the videos using them later in his room late at night humping his pillow, or early in the morning in the shower even getting bold enough to leave his door open hoping you would hear his whimpers and come stare at him while he came to his stockpile of footage. 

he had even started carrying his ipad around with him so he could watch both cameras he had set up in the living room. using the larger screen to view the camera on the dvd shelf directly in front of where you would usually sit and his phone for the wide angle in case you decided to change positions. 

he looked like some crazy hacker sneaking off to the back seat of his car setting up his devices. somewhere along the lines he bought another flesh light to keep in his car. he may or may not have searched for a pocket pussy that resembled yours at least from what he could tell. 

he would try to mimic the positions you were in, leaning back when you would ride a toy, fantasizing about you riding him, or rising to his knees leaning over to hump into the sticky silicone hole when you would bend over the couch. 

he sadly still hadn’t caught his ice cream thief even though the ice cream was still being eaten by someone he just either didn’t see the notification or they were way too quick with their hands. 

he’d also visited kun again. this time asking about the sound for the cameras. giving some story about his friends’ roommates talking shit about them and wanted to know what about. 

he felt like a kid on christmas when thee mics came in, installing them quickly and testing their quality. hoping to all the gods, that he knew wouldn’t let him into heaven at this point, that you would be desperate and needing to get off that very day so he could verify the sound quality. he wrote it off as trying to figure out if he could hear a wrapper when someone was at the fridge, not that he wanted to hear your whining and moaning. 

and by some stroke of luck you did get desperate and by a double stroke of luck you had plans that night. plans that included two large cocks filling you up so you needed to prep of course and haechan didn’t even know the show that was accidentally in store for him. 

he watched on, intently as you slowly with slick fingers dipped past your tight rim. he gawked at the way you whimpered when you curled your fingers inside of you. his airpods weren’t enough somehow and he hurriedly dug through his bag for his noise canceling headphones. 

when they connected he swore he could cum from the surround sound of your cries. he paid extra attention to each movement the way your voice changed or cracked when you added a finger. scissoring inside of your opening your warm walls, what he wouldn’t give to be inside of them himself. 

“just a little more,” you slurred before pressing a third finger inside of you, back arching into the fullness. you were talking yourself through it whimpering and moaning, biting your lip in concentration. 

he was starting to regret not exiting the library and at least hiding in a bathroom stall, now he was stuck in the back corner of the british history section on the third floor with a hard on and live porn on his phone. 

but he didn’t stop or even make a move, continuing to watch you stretch yourself the audio proving to be the best investment since the cameras. each little sigh was picked up on the mic he had cleverly placed next to the couch. 

it was getting hard both literally and figuratively to not whip out his cock and jerk off behind some dusty textbooks. so he pressed his hand against his crotch hissing at the contact and grinding slightly into his palm. 

he tilted his head back against the wall, eyes widening and bringing his phone closer when you started pulling your fingers from your hole. your empty rim clenched, almost begging to be filled again. 

“fuck,” you choked, reaching around beside you to grip your large plug pushing yourself up to grab your lube. haechan watched curiously seeing you squeeze a large amount onto the glass toy. 

you wondered if the boys you were going to see would call you pretty when they bent you over and saw the pretty flower pressed into your hole stretching you out. you shivered in anticipation, fingers moving to grip the base bringing it to your rim and sinking it slowly inside. you tried to go slow but the bulb felt so good stretching you out so you thrust backwards groaning at the stretch. 

haechan can hear you loud and clear and it’s going straight to his cock before he realizes he’s rutting his hips rubbing himself against his hand. watching desperately as you fuck yourself with the pretty plug. 

he had gotten used to your toy collection finding you far more experimental than he ever imagined, from dildos to vibrators and wands and now plugs. he wondered what all you had in your little treasure chest hidden in your room somewhere. he began to believe all the stories he had heard considering you surprised him each time he caught you. 

his brows tilt up in confusion when you slow your movements letting the plug settle between your cheeks. you're breathing slowly resting your head on the arm of the couch before you get up, grabbing the lube and going down the hall. he waits for a few seconds then a minute before you return to clean up the spot you occupied before. 

you weren’t stopping right? you hadn’t even cum you always came at least once. he recalled the time you had continued holding a vibrator to your clit until you were shaking and crying unsure of how many times you had actually released but the slick puddle glistening underneath you told him enough. 

he waits patiently watching his phone but you don’t reappear and his cock is hard and needy, twitching in his pants. he groans head hitting the wall behind him dropping his phone against his leg next to the outline of his dick. he tries to think of turn offs but truly he didn’t have many and whatever he thought of led him back to something that turned him on. 

now he was left in the british history section with blue balls and flushed cheeks trying to decide what to do. he wondered what you were doing walking around the house still naked with a plug stretching your ass. so he did what he knew to do. text you. 

evil roommate

what are you doing tonight?

he stared at his phone waiting for something, seeing your phone light up where it set on the coffee table. he watched you pick it up rolling your eyes and for some reason it made him more interested in you. 

y/n

why does it matter?

he smirked at your response still peeking at the mini screen in the corner of his phone watching you sit back on the couch position oddly reminiscent of the first time he watched you. knees bent and legs spread just enough for him to view your glistening cunt and the glass base peeking out between your cheeks. 

evil roommate

just wondering? maybe i have plans or something?

he waited for you to see the notification not ignoring the way your fingers danced between your legs to collect the cream spilling from your cunt. 

y/n

well i won’t be home if that’s what you mean?

his eyebrow raised. if you were going to study or out with your friends you would just say that not beat around the bush. he got distracted though when your fingers circled your clit lazily. it felt more intimate for some reason. the fact that he was talking to you and watching you. 

evil roommate

:( not staying cooped up in your room all night?

your fingers sped up wetness being spread around your soft pussy. you rolled your eyes wishing haechan would just shut up. you knew you couldn’t cum yet johnny had already made explicit rules but he didn’t say you couldn’t edge yourself. 

y/n

i don’t want to be witness to whatever weird ��plans” you have

he grinned, if only you knew. his plans consisted of watching videos of you and busting as many nuts as possible. if you weren’t home he would be able to sneak in and steal another pair of panties. he breathed deeply thinking of your smell that was so close but so far away. recalling how hard he had cum when he had stolen them before. fabric shoved in his mouth, your taste lingering on his tongue. the panties between his teeth silenced his loud whine when his eyes rolled back and legs started shaking. god he needed to stop his mind from wandering; he was just getting harder. 

evil roommate

how do you know i have weird plans? when have i ever done anything weird at our house?

you stopped, lifting your sticky fingers to your mouth as you read your phone. he watched you furrow your brows and type back quickly. 

y/n

when have you done anything normal? just don’t do your plans in my room i like cleanliness. 

evil roommate

seriously what are you doing though

y/n

it’s none of your beeswax

evil roommate

going to meet up with johnny or yuta? or both?

his lips twitch when he sees your eyes widen when you read the message. he could read you like a book, confirming his suspicions. not only were the guys' stories most likely true but you were going to meet up with both of them to get your back blown out. haechan wanted to be a fly on whatever wall got to witness that scene. he watches you squirm and shuffle around typing and deleting and typing and deleting a response. 

evil roommate

what embarrassed? cat got your tongue?

you rolled your eyes, biting your lip while you thought of a response. he was right but he didn’t need to know that. you didn’t want you sex crazed roommate having any intimate information about your sex life let alone what you did with johnny or yuta. 

y/n

it’s literally none of your business if i’m seeing anyone or no one. but fyi johnny invited me over to see the movie he’s been working on for his final

that was technically true. johnny was working on a film for a final, he had been talking about it for a while. and you were going to view some sort of media he had filmed before. whether you were in it or not was none of haechan’s business. yuta also happened to be invited, johnny had been teasing the final cut of a tape he had made with you. sadly jaehyun was out of town for some away game. you were half happy and sad, happy you wouldn’t have a dick in every hole but sad you wouldn’t have a dick in every hole by the end of the night. 

haechan knew what you were talking about. johnny had been filming a documentary since the beginning of the semester. he didn’t fully believe you unless you were going to do that and then get dicked down during or after. 

evil roommate

okay fine just wondering what if i wanted to spend the evening with my most favorite housemate :)

you breathed out a laugh as if you were his favorite roommate. he knew he was your least favorite. you much preferred his friends being over eating your food and being loud to him just staying in his room. 

y/n

yeah… you have the whole house to yourself to fuck whatever and whoever you should be happy just make sure the clean up after :)

he grinned to himself thinking of sitting in the very spot you were sitting completely naked on the couch. and he would take you up in that and fuck whatever and whoever while he was home alone. and he would watch videos of you while he did. maybe even connect his hdmi to the living room tv get your pretty pussy on the big screen. 

you closed your phone, dropping it on the cushion beside you before getting up, mood ruined by haechan’s pestering. haechan watched the way your ass bounced as you walked down the hall to your room. 

he closed his phone too. finally getting up grabbing his bag and stalking to the bathrooms locking the stall and finally getting the release you unknowingly withheld from him. 

he paid extra attention to wake up earlier the next day despite his tiresome late night activities, and watch you come home. taking care to see any signs of hard sex, bruises, hickies, or even a limp. 

but when you came home and he was sitting on the couch eating cereal he didn’t particularly notice which made him question all his conclusions from the day before. maybe you had just gone to johnny’s to watch his film and maybe u just liked wearing a butt plug around. 

you didn’t talk to him when you got home heading straight for your room not even sparing him a glance as he stared at you searching for something. 

he stayed on the couch for most of the day and into the evening playing tears of the kingdom to no end. not even noticing jaemin coming and going or karina complaining about some project she hasn’t started and needing to camp out at the library. 

you eventually joined him in the living room giving in to his pestering to show you the new game you had been waiting to play. he talked way too much about all the new features that didn’t completely make sense but you listened anyway and watched him die by bokoblin’s. 

his eyes caught sight of your neck when your shirt collar shifted seeing a bite mark hidden on your left breast. maybe his theories were correct, but his suspicions were distracting him, causing him to die once again. 

his lack of skill in the new game had you laughing but also frustrated you, eventually grabbing the controllers and trying your hand but dying just as fast as he did. blaming it on his shitty weapons or lack of hearts. 

“told you,” he said, smirking as he leaned back in his chair when you died once more, eyes drifting to your wrist noticing raised skin reminiscent of rope burn. thoughts wandering to what you looked like tied up. 

“is this harder than breath of the wild or am i just rusty?”

“definitely both but you suck at breath of the wild too.”

“shut up!” you squealed faux throwing the controller at his head making him duck. 

“wait let me show you this video.” he pulled out his phone, pushing his glasses up on the bridge of his nose. “some dude used the building materials and built this walking stick man with a flamethrower for his dick.” he laughed, scrolling through his camera roll to find the video. he held the phone to your face and you watched on, laughter filling the room. 

you grabbed the phone from his hand replaying the video watching the awkward wooden creation blast across the screen with a flame shooting from its lower half. your laughter faded turning into a face of confusion when you tapped the screen to rewind seeing the video thumbnails surrounding that one. 

“what the fuck is this lee donghyuck!?” tapping the arrow in the corner, the screen filled with various thumbnails and many of you sitting in the very room you occupied now. 

“oh not the government name,” he chuckled as he leaned forward to see what you were talking about the color draining from his face when you began playing a video, the static sound coming from his phone. 

“what the actual fuck is this.” you shrieked, shoving the phone in his face and he looked like he was about to be sick. the video clip he had saved, one of you sitting in the exact chair he was sitting on, fingers drilling into yourself as you came with a cry. 

“you’ve been filming me?” you were oddly calm in his opinion but his mind was racing trying to come up with something to say while his mouth was suddenly dry. 

he had always fantasized about being caught during one of his escapades but that had never actually happened. and now that you were glaring at him asking him questions and his stomach was dropping to his ass. 

“i asked you a question you fucking freak.”

“let me explain.”

“explain what? that you’re a fucking pervert who secretly films his roommate?” you shrill standing up and staring daggers down at him. 

“i was trying to figure out who was stealing my ice cream.” he said shyly realizing how fucking stupid he sounded bringing his fingers to fiddle with the hem of his shorts. 

“oh my god you fucking idiot. no one wants your fucking ice cream. you set up cameras and didn’t tell us? you know that’s illegal? are you fucking stupid or just dumb or both?” haechan peered up at you avoiding eye contact but trying to pay attention. his face felt hot and embarrassment flooded him with each passing second. 

“i didn’t.” he paused, looking up at you through his lashes. “didn’t think it was a big deal since it’s like a common area. i didn’t mean to watch you but-“ he paused looking down between his legs. you laughed down at him tossing his phone on the table between the couch and chair where he sat. 

“but what?” you questioned bringing your fingers to push his forehead back so he would meet your eyes. haechan was trying his hardest not to get hard knowing you could literally call the cops on him but you looked so hot glaring at him from above. he didn’t know that you were just as perverted as him, planning out how to punish him. 

“i- it was an accident. the first time. really i swear.” he stared up at you, his hands raised in defense trying to make you believe him. 

“then why did you save it? you were getting off to me weren’t you? fucking freak.” your words stung but went straight to his growing cock. he didn’t want to answer hoping his silence was enough. 

“were you?”

“yes,” he whispered, before bringing his lips between his teeth. 

“how many times?” 

“i- i dunno.” he was being honest he lost track of the amount of times he had watched you. he knew it was more than 10 and probably less than 30 but he wasn’t totally sure. 

“how long have you been doing it?” he tried to look away again, searching for an answer like it would appear in front of him. but you grabbed his face squeezing his cheeks in your hand making him look at you. 

“maybe more than a month i - i can’t - don’t remember.” he stumbled over his words before you released his face but only to bring your hand back slapping his cheek. and he whined he fucking whined, raising his hand to rub at the reddening flesh. 

“remember better then.”

“okay it was the day yang and taro came over and we ate all that pizza and you got mad at us because we spilled garlic sauce on your lit book. but we blamed taro so you wouldn’t be as mad since you like him but it was really yangyang that spilled it.” the confession came bubbling out like he was a volcano ready to erupt. 

“haechan, that was over 2 months ago.” you sigh almost mocking him. “so you have been watching me everytime?” he nodded slightly. 

“everytime?” you repeated. 

“if i couldn’t watch it live i would save it and watch it when i could,” he confessed. something about the thought of him being so into it he would save it for later made you clench around nothing. 

“did you cum too?” you could practically hear him gulp when you leaned down coming face to face with him. he didn’t answer, just attempted to avoid eye contact. “i fucking asked if you came while you watched me?”

“i couldn’t help it,” he stuttered. 

“you know you’re fucking disgusting right?” you questioned bringing your hand to his face again rubbing over the red cheek before slapping it again. he hissed this time hips jumping up. 

“a disgusting little pervert and you're getting off now aren’t you?” you brought your other hand to hover over his crotch before firmly gripping his length making him curse under his breath. 

“you know i should call the police, the dean, file a report, get you kicked out of school at the least.” he nodded below you as you grazed his cheek with one hand and squeezed your other around his length. 

“that wouldn’t be as fun though.” you smiled when you lifted a leg to straddle him. his breathing sped up when he felt you rest your warmth fully on his lap. he wanted to buck his hips into you, rut into your fist for some relief. 

“i’m going to watch you now, and your little cameras in here are going to record it. then you’re going to save it and send it to me. got it?”

he nodded, his hair bouncing on his forehead before you leaned back, removing your hands from his face and clothed cock. he quickly moved his hands from his side, fiddling with his waistband to pull his cock out. 

“nuhuh,” you stopped him. “i didn’t say i was gonna watch you get yourself off, did i?” he shook his head. “you think you deserve to touch yourself after that’s all you’ve been doing when you watch me?”

“i’m not going to let you have the joy of picking a toy, obviously.” you grinned, head tilting. “but what is your favorite? if you’ve been watching me i’m sure you’re familiar with them.” his eyes widen and scan the content in his mind focusing in on certain toys he’s seen you use. 

“the purple one.” he says, picturing the small purple wand he had seen you many times and it always left you gushing. you raised an eyebrow, immediately knowing what toy he was talking about. you lifted yourself off of him walking around his chair and down the hall without a word. 

he tried to steady his breathing and prepare himself for whatever you had in store. he was also insanely relieved you hadn’t immediately called the police to report him. he heard your door open and shut and your feet pat down the hall and behind him. 

he gasped when he felt a cool medal on his right wrist, he turned quickly eyes shaking just as you closed a cuff around his wrist. he just stared as you yanked his other arm over his head and tightened the other cuff around it, securing his hands together before letting his arms fall in front of him and land on his lap. 

he’d been cuffed before usually at his own volition or with this guy from his biochem class but that fizzled out a year or more ago. never by a hot girl like you who was about to punish him. you finally stood in front of him, light purple wand in one hand. 

“your perverted little mind is probably running a mile a minute.” you were right he wanted to know what you were going to do to him, if his camera was getting all of this. 

“stand up.” he tried to as quick as he could but his legs wobbled but he did it. you faced him and grabbed the chain that connected his hands pulling him to the couch where you had been sitting before releasing him and tugging his shorts down in one swift movement. he hissed when his cock made contact with the cool air and slapped the chain that connected his wrists. 

“aww aren’t you cute,” you lilted, kneeling in front of him staring at his leaking cock before flicking the head with your finger making him jerk forward. he didn’t have a chance to regain balance before you pushed him back on the couch with a thud. he squirmed on the leather seat cock bobbing between his legs precum beading at the slit. 

“you really are a freak,” you smiled, lifting the toy admiring the familiar ridges that left you quivering. you held it beside his own cock admiring aching member. haechan’s cock was what you would call pretty, plush red tip, subtle veining, not too long and just slightly thicker than average. it seemed to hang heavy between his supple thighs. 

“why do you like this one?” you ask, tilting your head curiously looking at him from between his legs. he’d dreamt of you between his legs but not while he was handcuffed and you were scolding him, more of you between his legs choking on his cock. 

“uh, i, you,” he paused, leaning his head back and closing his eyes, taking a deep breath. “you, i watched you use it.”

“oh really? of course you have. what haven’t you seen at this point.” you roll your eyes flicking your wrist to tap against his lower stomach with the tip of the toy to bring his attention back to you. 

“you, you looked so hot. you always look hot, but you use this one so much,” he whispered. his words made heat pool between your legs. the idea of him watching you cum over and over, none the wiser to his viewing. if you had known you might have been more deliberate with your actions. 

“did you like that? did watching me get you all hard?” you cooed bringing your fingers to circle the head of his cock collecting the precum spreading it around. he hummed staring down at the movement between his legs. “i bet you came in your pants like a stupid bitch.” your words were shooting to his cock, twitching when before you flicked the head again making his legs shake. 

“i loved it. i love it.” he whimpered. 

“how’d you touch yourself?” you cocked a brow at him waiting for his response. you’d never gotten off on dominating someone always preferring to be the one getting dominated, but you could feel your panties dampening with each reaction, sound, and bob of his cock. 

“i was at work.” he started licking his lips. “i uh, it wasn’t busy. i went to the employee bathrooms. you were still, you weren’t using it yet. you were sitting here and fingering yourself. your pussy was so wet, i wanted to taste you so bad.” he paused again taking a breath. “put my phone on the sink so i could watch you but then i kept seeing myself in the mirror. watched you and watched myself when i came. came so hard watching you. fucking pussy was so wet you were fucking dripping. wanted to be in you. came so hard and so much, made a mess. got in trouble for being gone for so long but it was worth it.” he finished finally making eye contact with you. 

you hoped he didn’t notice how turned on he was making you. the way he spoke about you in such a filthy way. you didn’t see haechan, your obnoxious annoying roommate in front of you, but donghyuck, the loser you met your first year who was awkward and shy and not so secretly harboring a perverted feelings for you. 

“you are fucking pathetic.” you raised your voice using the toy that was still in your hand to tap along his clothed stomach and up his chest. he keened when the toy brushed his nipples through the fabric of his sweatshirt.

he knew you knew about how sensitive his nipples were. it was just common knowledge in your circle everyone picked on haechan for it, pinching and tweaking his nipples to make him scream. no one knew that it made his cock hard though, of course now you would know. 

“i am,” he confirmed, biting his lip when you laughed at his squirming. 

“at least you’re aware.” you paused, dropping the toy in the his lap and bringing your fingers to unzip his sweatshirt. he was glad he didn’t wear anything beneath offering you easy access to his nipples. he whined when your skin finally met his, the teasing touches felt like electricity sparking on his chest. 

“i’m so fucking pathetic,” he groaned when you tweaked his nipples, pinching the buds between your soft fingers, nails pressing into the pebbled skin. you laughed tauntingly at him, something about the way he called himself pathetic was so hot. 

“i bet you’re glad i caught you, right? you were waiting and hoping for it. this is all your perverted little fantasies coming true. you should be thanking me.” there was spit pooling in his mouth, he felt dumb already, with how you were looking up at him an evil glint in your eyes and a teasing lilt in your tone. 

“thank you, fuck.” he paused when you let your hand roam lower, one staying on his left nipple the other tickling lightly over his stomach. “thank you so much.”

you grabbed the toy again pressing the well worn button the sound of vibrations filled the space between you and haechan’s eyes widened. you moved the toy to tap against his nipple making him keen and fold into himself whines sliding up his throat. 

“you’re so sensitive,” you coo at his reaction. switching the toy swiftly to the neglected nipple, making him squirm. you could help but laugh at how pathetic he looked squirming in front of you begging to stop but also asking for more his cock was throbbing precum slipping out with each pulse. 

“it’s - fuck- ‘s too much,” he mewled pitifully, legs quivering. 

“aww sorry, is it too much for you,” you teased lifting the toy from his nipple as he nodded. 

“maybe this will help,” you offered, upping the vibrations before bringing the buzzing device between his legs touching the head of his cock. his eyes flew open as he groaned and writhed. 

“please, y/n, oh god,” he strained the veins in his neck and lower stomach appearing under his skin. 

“please what?” his hands were trying to separate but the chain didn’t let them so he opened and closed his fists tightly fully overwhelmed. 

“i’m gonna cum oh god,” he cried, jerking his hips to rub against the buzzing toy. 

“we can’t have that, can we,” you teased, pulling the toy away swiftly, making him whimper. 

“please.” he sounded like he was sobbing now as his head hung down. 

“do you really think it would be that easy?” you asked bringing the still buzzing toy back to his nipples his stomach tensed warm pleasure flooding him again. 

“i’m sorry, fuck, so sorry,” he cried, bucking his hips up off the couch. you smirked at him turning up the toy again with a simple click. “please don’t i’ll cum.”

“you’ll cum just from your nipples?” your curiosity might just get the best of you when he nodded weakly. 

“no way,” you teased excitedly, eager to see if he was telling the truth. you used your other hand to squeeze and pinch the untouched bud. 

“can’t take it,” he whimpered, giving up to the tightening in his stomach so close to letting go. 

“cum then, little pervert,” that was all he needed, the degrading name going straight to unravel the knot in his stomach. his hips jerked hot cum spurting out of his cock as you looked on in awe. his body was hot and buzzing, cum painting his chest. 

“good boy.” you smiled, pulling the toy away and turning it off dropping it somewhere beside him. you dipped your fingers over his stomach collecting his cum before smearing it on his cheeks. he stuck his tongue out chasing your fingers. you scoffed slapping your sticky hand across his messy cheek. 

“fuck,” he whimpered as you stood up in front of him, reaching to pat his head and brush the hair from his face. you didn’t realize how sweaty he had gotten, strands of hair sticking to his skin and his glasses were slightly foggy as he was catching his breath.

“i’m still not done with you. wouldn’t it be so much fun to just leave you sitting here cock out, cum on your chest, and handcuffed. your little camera, wherever it is, to record you.” his eyes went wide, shaking his head furiously. 

“no no no what if jaemin or karina come home. no please,” he begged, whimpering up at you. 

“then they would point and laugh at you, but you would like that too fucking perv.” you lifted your hands to pull your own shirt over your head seeing the boys’ adam’s apple bob as he made eye contact with your tits. 

“fuck me,” he murmured, eyeing the bite marks that littered your chest. 

“isn’t it better to see the real thing, in person? not through your shitty camera.” you told him as your own fingers now touched your nipples pulling and tugging at the buds. you felt more excited watching his reaction the way his eyes scanned as you toyed with your tits. 

“so much fucking better.” he confirmed but you didn’t really need him to. his hands opened and closed almost trying to reach out for you. 

“where is your little camera anyways?” you said turning around looking around the room. 

“on the dvd shelf,” he says, hanging his head. you walked over to the shelf looking between dusty cd and dvd cases. “it’s with the old psp games.” he looked back up, gawking at the site of your bare back, marks from someone or multiple someone’s teeth littered your shoulders and neck along with a mark he again assumed was rope burn that went around your shoulders and disappeared at your back. 

“aha,” you sounded, finally finding the small camera in the corner of the dark shelf. “as if you weren’t trying to be sneaky.” you laughed waving at the camera. you turned back around to face him but you didn’t move back towards him. 

“i’m sorry,” he offered again. 

“oh you will be. this camera is going to get the best view of me ruining you,” he groaned in response leaning back against the couch. you stalked back over to him and he looked back up at you. 

“i think i’ve decided what else to do with you and you can tell me your color. i know you’re into this but i’m not as much of a perv as you and i value consent.” you brought your hands to your hips as he nodded up at you. “got it?”

“yes. i’m so green right now.” 

“umhuh.” you slipped your hands beneath your waistband slipping your shorts down and letting them pool at your ankles. haechan wanted to cry not from anything other than how hot you were like your body was sculpted by michelangelo. the real thing was so much better than the cameras. 

“eyes up here hyuck,” the endearing nickname slipping for your mouth and settling somewhere in haechan’s tummy filling him with warmth as he looked back up into your eyes. 

“sorry you’re just so pretty,” he gulped. 

“i know.” you laughed, stepping forward between his legs. “i don’t think you really deserve any of this for how disgusting you are. but at the same time i think you should stop fantasizing and get the real thing once right?” he nodded harshly, hair bobbing around his face. you brought one leg up, resting a foot on the arm of the couch fully trapping him with your cunt on display. his mouth was watering, your wetness glistening right in front of him he could practically taste you. 

“you’re not even listening.” you tutted, bringing your hand between your legs a site he was all too familiar with. you dipped your fingers between your lips collecting an obscene amount of slick with your fingers before pulling them away. you leaned in front of haechan bringing your soaked fingers to shove between his lips. he moaned around your fingers not breaking eye contact as his tongue swirled around your creamy digits. 

“this will help you focus, right?” you questioned, he nodded humming around your fingers. you moved your leg again this time bending to settle on his thighs again you could feel the heat radiating off of him as your skin pressed to his. his cock was just a few centimeters from being pressed against your own stomach. 

“i’m going to ride you, and you’re going to like it, right?" he nodded, moaning again in response as your fingers fucked into his mouth. “and you’re going to make me cum. but you don’t cum until i say so.” he whimpered but bobbed his head anyway. 

“good boy,” you praised, pulling your fingers from his mouth, spit spilling from his lips. you didn’t clean your hand bringing the slippery digits to caress his cheek mixing with his cum. 

you leaned over grabbing the toy you had teased him with earlier before slipping off his lap and settling beside him. he watched intently the way you laid back against the opposite arm of the couch and spread your legs just for him. he turned his body fully peering between your legs, cunt glistening and fluttering. 

“i didn’t say to move,” you said sternly, bringing a foot to press against his shoulder and push him back into his place before letting your leg drape over his. he neck craned to get the best view of your pussy. 

you brought the toy between your legs sliding it over your clit circling the raised nub. you relaxed into the feeling staring at haechan who was staring between your legs, finally getting a front row seat to his favorite show. 

“you’re drooling.” you taunt, and he brings his connected hands to wipe at the skin around his mouth just rubbing the spit around rather than removing it.

you turned on the toy, the vibrations immediately overtaking you, the buzz spreading in your lower stomach. you whined pulling your lip between your teeth flicking your wrist pleasure washing over you. you swirled the toy as pressure built in your stomach. 

“you’re so fucking hot,” haechan mumbled, glancing up to see your face twist in pleasure. you watched him swipe his tongue over his lips and visibly gulp seeing the cream already dripping from between your legs. 

you reached up grabbing his hair and pulled him to you kissing him harshly, it didn’t take him long to collect himself moving his lips against yours. his hands fumbled trying to rest them around you but just tugging against each other. you continued pressing the toy between your legs whimpering against his mouth.

he moaned into you when you slipped your tongue into his mouth. he tasted like those stupid double vanilla yogurt bars he loved so much. 

you pulled him away spit connecting your mouths as his tongue lapped up as if reaching for you. you turned off the toy tossing it beside you, gripping his hair tighter and tugging him between your legs. 

“use your tongue,” you whispered and he didn’t need another word, tongue sliding over your clit. kitten licking at your most sensitive spot, you tasted better than he could have imagined, still reminiscent of the taste of your panties but double or tripled or whatever. 

he leaned in deeper feeling the tug on his scalp as he lapped at your hole feeling it flutter against his wet muscle. his tongue explored every spot it could touch sucking and drinking you up. he couldn’t hear you whining from the wet smacking his mouth was making as he ate you like his final meal. 

he felt your hand pull his hair harder and your thighs shiver around his head, squeezing his glasses frame into his cheeks. he recognized the shiver as an indicator you were close so he went harder, suctioning his mouth around your clit and flicking his tongue over the bud. he was grinding down against the couch awkwardly cock already hard again grunting into your cunt. 

your eyes rolled back as you came against his face, hips bucking, riding out your orgasm. he didn’t stop until you physically pulled him away, chin shiny and lips pulled in a shy smile. 

“you taste so fucking good,” he looked up at you, leaning in again to lick one more long strip collecting as much slick as he could. you let go of his hair laying back to catch your breath and he stayed between your legs. 

suddenly realizing how badly his wrists hurt pressed into the couch awkwardly beneath him. he sat up, eyes not leaving you, wanting so desperately to grab your hips and fuck his cock into your cunt. 

finally opening your eyes looking up at him, heat in your cheeks and his hair was disheveled, glasses slipping down his nose. he was licking over his lips swiping his sleeve over his chin. 

you sat back up and straddled him again before lifting up to your knees bringing a hand between the both of you grabbing his length and pressing it to your slippery entrance. 

“holy fuck,” haechan groaned, staring down watching his cock slide between your folds. he could cum again just from this but he was determined to feel you wrapped around him. he felt dizzy with each swirl of your hips, your clit was swollen and puffy against his plush head.

“i’ve barely done anything,” you laughed, hearing him let out a strangled gasp when you sat down in one fluid motion. you sighed feeling so full all at once and his cock was so perfect filling you up completely. 

“you’re fucking, holy shit, y/n.” he whined, hands grabbing for you but the chain stopping him from being able to hold your skin. he was squirming beneath you head shaking back and forth eyes closed, lashes fluttering on his cheeks. “fucking tight.” 

“i know, hyuck,” you said, squeezing around him using it as punctuation. you lifted your hips finally moving, letting his cock slide inside of you perfectly. he looked a mess in front of you sweat trailing down his exposed chest and hair scruffy.

your hands slide under his sleeves pushing them down before gripping his shoulders using him for leverage bringing your hips up before slamming back down. his breath was hot and heavy as he leaned up and nuzzled into your chest. his tongue hung out of his mouth like a puppy panting and begging. 

releasing one of his shoulders you reached between you both, yanking the chain that connected his hands pulling on it to lift his hands above his head and push them against the wall pressing into his chest. he looked up at you needy and desperate fists clenching in the air. 

“keep them up,” you commanded, and he could only nod up at you, keeping his arms in place over his hand. this gave you more room to swivel your hips above him. 

“good boy, you feel so good, hyuckie,” you mewled, grinding down on him, clit pressing into his hips. he whimpered at the nickname head lulling back into your chest with a cry. his tongue stuck out again leaving wet strips against your skin he was murmuring against you but you couldn’t tell what he was saying. 

his hips were thrusting upwards, meeting your every move. his hands felt heavy above his head and he urged, to bring them around you trapping you against him but he wasn’t going to break another rule. 

“feel so good. wanna fuck you,” he mouthed against your breast tongue searching for your nipple. 

“you are fucking me,” you breathed, threading a hand through his hair, the head of his cock pressing perfectly deep inside of you. 

“no i- i know,” he paused, slurping lewdly sucking your nipple into his mouth making you gasp. “i want to fuck you.” he repeated his words came out garbled as his tongue swirled around the bud. he looked up at you mischievously batting his lashes. 

“i’m not uncuffing you if that's what you think.” you said sternly gripping his locks and pulling his head from your chest to look down at him while your hips were bucking erratically on top of him. 

“hurts.” 

“good,” you replied with a smile that was quickly replaced with an open mouthed gasp and a tighter grip on his hair. he thrusted up into you, filling you to the brim, your walls squeezing his cock. 

“can i please? been fucking dreaming of your cunt.” he leaned back resting his arms on his head for some relief. “i mean literally,” he paused with a groan eyes moving down from your sticky chest to his cock disappearing into your cunt. “having wet fucking dreams like a loser.”

“you are a loser and a filthy pervert. dreaming about your roommate who you’ve been peeping on it’s fucking disgusting.” he reeled at your words shooting to his cock, squeezing his eyes together fending off the urge to release hot cum inside your tight hole like he had dreamed. 

“tell me your dream.” his eyes opened glazed over with lust and desire looking at you, cheeks red and glasses fully fogged hiding the dilation of his pupils. 

“had you, in my bed.” he paused when you rocked particularly hard against him. “laid down all pretty. fucking sexy, was fucking you so good. you kept crying and crying and wanting more. shit- fucked my cum into your cunt.” his words went straight between your legs stomach tightening as you clenched around his cock before you brought your fingers from his hair to his chest and already to his abused nipples. 

“fuck oh my god you’re gonna make me cum,” he cried hands falling from his head to push against your stomach trying to stop you. 

“you gonna fuck your cum into my cunt?” you teased feeling your own orgasm rushing towards you. he nodded squirming at the feeling doing everything he could to stop himself. but your warm tight heat was sucking him in like a vice, he wanted so badly to bend you over ass up and fuck his cum deep into your cunt until you were full and dripping.

“then do it,” you demanded. he stared at you as if asking for permission eyes glinting up at you with need when you nodded back at him. he wasted no time, his arms moved up and over you trapping you against his sweaty chest, hands splaying over your back and moving down to try and grip at your ass, as his hips sped up beneath you. the new angle allowing him to fill you up deeper, cock hitting you perfectly. skin smacking together moaning in unison as he pounded into you.

“i’m gonna cum, hyuck,” you whined, eyes closed as he stared up at you with determination.

“cum on my cock, fuck. gonna fill you up,” he groaned, his tongue licked against your chest again driving you over the edge with a cry and shaking legs.

“holy shit,” you mewled, letting the pleasure overtake you, grinding down on his hips in return.

“fuck you’re so fucking tight,” he whined, suddenly you not only wanted him to cum but you needed him to. bringing your fingers from his shoulders to tap your fingers down his chest and pinch at his nipples.

“fuck, y/n,” hot breath hitting your neck as he groaned. you were dancing on the edge of over sensitivity.

“cum for me, fill my cunt up, please hyuckie,” you whined, he responded with a moan and jerk of his hips letting his hot cum shoot deep inside of you.

he continued thrusting into you looking down at the white ring forming around the base of his cock as you tried to push at his hips to stop him but he had you pressed against himself. 

“don’t wanna fucking stop, shit,” he groaned as his hips finally slowed the overstimulation spreading down his own body making his toes curl and legs shake. 

you fell against him, head tucking into his neck as you caught your breath. his hands smoothed over your back relaxing you. 

“gimme your hands,” you finally said breaking the silence and he lifted his arms from around you bringing them between you both.

“you take the cameras down tomorrow,” you said sternly and he nodded. you grabbed his hands pressing a button on one cuff to unlock it before doing the other. once his hands were free he brought them back around you, grabbing your ass like he had been wishing to do before lifting you up. 

“shh, let me,” he answered before you could protest. he laid you back against the couch before pulling out staring between your legs watching his cum slide out. he leaned down face to face with your cunt again. his fingers spreading your pussy as he leaned in to lap his own cum from your cunt. you gawked at him watching him lewdly slurp your pussy collecting every drop of your combined juices. 

“you really are disgusting,” he just smirked up at you from between your legs. not moving as he let his tongue roam your cunt again.

“nope,” you said pushing a hand against his head already feeling overstimulated. but he didn’t really care you tasted so good and looked so good from where he sat.

“hyuck, ‘m sensitive,” you whimpered, protests going unnoticed as you squirmed and pulled on his hair.

“just taste so good,” he mumbled, hands reaching to grab your thighs he so desperately wanted to grip earlier. he felt unrestricted this time hands kneading your skin feeling the goosebumps rise.

“too much,” you whined when he suckled your clit into his mouth. he tried to hold back a smile peaking up at you through his frames, eyes shut tight, lip pulled between your teeth, pretty face twisted in pleasure.

he couldn’t get enough lapping at your hole still tasting himself mixing with you. just reaffirming that he had really fucked you it wasn’t some fever dream. he fucked you and made you cum twice and came in your pretty pussy.

“so fucking good. just stay still,” he groaned into you vibrating against your cunt making your legs shake around him.

“so hard, ‘s too much, hyuck,” you whimpered, your other hand had moved up to grip your breast while the other stayed pulling at his locks.

“just one more, baby,” he smiled, leaning back to admire the way your cunt was gushing all over again before settling back placing kisses over your lips and clit. he moved one of the hands holding you down rest just above the action where he was fucking his tongue into you. his fingers swirled over your clit making you whine.

“sound so pretty. even better in person,” he chuckled, the pleasure was bubbling in your stomach all over again.

he watched you shiver knowing you were close he moved his fingers and suctioned his mouth around your clit flicking his tongue over the swollen bud listening to your whine and whimper was music to his ears.

“cum,” he said releasing for a moment before diving back between your legs slurping at your cunt. you couldn’t hold it back legs shivering around his face again, crying into your palm as you came.

“good girl,” he said between licks, he finally pulled away when the tugging on his hair got to be too much. you laid there catching your breath staring up at the ceiling.

“you’re pussy is like the most perfect creation, swear to god,” he said rather seriously taking you from your empty day dream to look over at him admiring the space between your legs. he glanced up at you making quick eye contact before watching your still fluttering hole. your head felt full and foggy but also empty and numb.

“would you sit on my face.”

“no more,” you said sitting up to push him off.

“maybe like tomorrow,” he asked with a smirk.

“shut up,” you groaned moving your legs from around him and rolling off the couch. wobbling on your feet he lifted a hand to slap your ass playfully, you whined cuffs in one hand and toy in the other before walking down the hall. he watched you patter to your room listening for the door. 

“wanna play more zelda,” he called when he got off the couch, legs equally as shaky. 

“yeah in like thirty minutes,” you called back making him smile. 

before long you were both back together on the couch, cleaned up and somewhat put together sitting beside each other sharing his double vanilla yogurt ice cream and bickering back and forth about the gameplay. 

“can i put one in your room?” haechan asked when the conversation had lulled. you sat up staring daggers into him. 

“have you learned nothing?” 

“if i say no will you do that again?” he smirked over at you. 

“god you really are sick in the head.”

“i love it when you’re mean to me,” he said, tilting his head to tease you. 

“probably a little too much don’t you think?” you asked, rolling your eyes and leaning back. 

“a normal amount for a perverted fuck like me,” you laughed at him eyes drifting back to the screen when he unpaused and started to play again. the room was somewhat quiet until he offered you tips and tried to tell you what he was doing in the game. 

your mind was drifting similarly to the way his did earlier. the idea of having him watch you but knowing this time was arousing all over again. you thought to the camera that was still in the room that had recorded the two of you fucking not even an hour earlier. you wondered what it would be like if there was a camera in his room that you could watch. catching him jerking off at his desk or humping his pillow or having a wet dream about god knows what. 

“you can put one in my room but only if i get to put one in your room,” his jaw dropped, not expecting you to agree and add delicious stipulations. 

“are you fucking serious,” he said, as link fell from a sky island to his death. 

“yes, but don’t be weird about it. we’re not making this weird,” you said gesturing between the two of you and whatever this relationship was. “also no watching if there’s someone else involved.”

“deal,” he raised his hand for a shake of agreement, he tried to seem casual but his mind was running a marathon at all the prospects. 

“since you’re being so generous, will you tell me who’s been eating my ice cream?” he said tipping the popsicle stick to you, you laughed over at him. 

“shotaro.” you responded with a glint in your eyes.

© tddyhyck

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[xyrill]

i ate an edible

so i made one piece admirals costco headcanons

have some doodles i made beforehand lolzies

bors

i feel like borsalino would obliberate a costco hot dog! they are literally $1.50 in the US! like wtf he would totally buy 5 or more, eat a few, and put some in the fridge.

he'd also buy a ton of snacks. maybe even $100 worth of dried nuts, fruits, and chips.... a junkie since i'd call him a stoner

he'd also buy ramen packs to stock; damn i feel like he would just eat ramen everyday-- restaurant ramen, home made ramen, and mf instant ramen

go to the optometrist section, try out sunglasses, but never buy them because he's attached to his yellow ass sunglasses

buy alcohol on sale

frequents costco with another admiral-- he goes by himself if he has to buy groceries

sak

sakazuki would totally fucking demolish a chicken bake. but honestly, like buy one to eat for lunch and buy a frozen pack from the freezer section of costco and reheat them for the next following lunches.

he would also sometimes buy the $5 rotisserie chicken. they have the best seasoning MMM

the karen of the admirals. complain to the manager if his rotisserie chicken is taking more than 15 MINUTES to cook

buys a pack of beer every week

he goes by himself and gets annoyed when someone asks to tag along

kuzan

kuzan? he would absolutely love to prepare dinners and buy bulk.

he'd eat up an entire potato salad.

buy fruit and fresh produce

even hit up the bakery

stock up on gift cards like a smart man

he stocks up on vitamins, probably even buys fish oil pills

fujitora

frequents the clothes section

he would dress up like a dad/uncle, buying the best flip flops/sandals

he'd always buy the 24 pack eggs or more

the very opposite of sakazuki, he'd be the most patient person with busy employees

self checkout but with the help of an employee

try out the occasional massage chairs

buy packs of melatonin gummies :)

aramaki

this fucker doesn't even have a costco card

he would sneak in with another admiral or pair up with some random person with a card to get in

he buys all the toys and cool looking comic books at the book section

he would only try samples and buy snacks

he gets a cart, not just to put his stuff in, but to have the right of way and be fast.

sengoku

would buy gift cards to restaurants -- he would definitely love olive garden

always asks an employee where stuff is

a bit impatient, especially if he's behind a slow person walking

looks at all the books

goes to the produce section just to find food for his goat :)

he buys ugly/cute stuffed animals

he'd be a fucking squishmallow collector omg...

garp

buys sweaters and clothes for koby from the clothes section

fuck, he probably loves koby more than asl >_> (probably not true)

would go to the headphones section and listen to the random songs that it plays

ACTUALLY, he would bring koby around in costco and be an absolute dad, embarrassing him with whatever chance he gets

frequents coscto with sengoku

he would go to costco with sengoku if he loses his costco card-- which is almost all the time maybe

edit: there are so many grammar mistakes oh my god HAHAHA

[sorrowsdespair]

Rapunzel, Rapunzel, Let Us In!

Warning: kidnapping, manipulation, isolation, probably ooc Taskforce 141, can be read as Yandere taskforce, not proofread

Prompt: Taskforce find You, a sheltered bunny, who saves and provides a place for them to stay. Can they convince you that they aren't as bad as your family makes the world out to be?

Taken at birth, you had lived with a twisted form of family. A mother that dresses you in pretty clothing to show off, a father would spoils you with items to distract you, a brother who babies you claiming that should always rely on him. Of course, you are never allowed to leave the house deep within the woods sometimes you can play outside in the garden with your brother if you're on your best behavior. Society is dangerous full of mean people who will take advantage of you especially when you become of age.

One day Mother, Father, and Big Brother left. They never came back you’re not sure how long it had been but they did tell you in case this happened there was money hidden away for you to use when food was low.

This is how you spent your next years, alone, only leaving your house to for food and ignoring people who try to talk with you. That was until on the way back, you come across a man slumped on the porch of your house.

Fear and curiosity consumed you as you drew closer to man. He’s eyes were closed and his chest was rising up and down. He was dressed in odd bulky vest and clothing with things strapped to it, and wearing a cap.

Father had told you to never get close to someone especially an unknown man due to the dangers they present. But from where you stand you can see blood seeping through his odd outfit and you remember a show where a little girl playing doctor helping toys who are hurt, you are rarely allowed to watch TV but it would be a secret for you to keep, since it’s the right thing to do besides Mother taught you how to bandages.

So with all your courage and lack of strength, you drag the man in by his armpits carefully placing him in front of the couch. You had left to place the groceries in the kitchen, quickly putting any freezer and fridge stuff away, and left to grab a medical box before returning to the man patching him up after struggling to remove the vest and shirt.

Price was stressed not only did their missing go awry, couldn’t get a heli to pick them up due to a storm rolling in an hour or so, but they all had gotten separate, additional Gaz gone radio silent a moment ago. Thankfully, He managed to regroup with Ghost and Soap.

When Gaz came around he was not expecting to see you over him and neither you did expect him to wake up. Gaz watches you let out a yelp and jump away from him your eyes widen in fear staring back at him.

It takes a lot of coaxing you into talking with him, even when you barely give him much other than your name, this was their parent's house, and you wanted to help him just like the Little girl playing doctor. Just as Gaz’s radio go off with the voice of Ghost call for him to which Gaz response being bombarded with question that he tries his best to answer.

All it was for Gaz to try and convince you to help guide his mates here from the raging storm, and I mean a lot of convincing because you kept cowarding away from him and shaking your head. Gaz didn't feel comfortable do this but he had mentioned how you to help him just like the doc and a doctor helps everyone.

That seemed to work and you told him how there were switches for spotlights outside to the right of the house. You had told him you were never allowed to touch them so he has to do so you don't get in trouble.

You watch as the man who introduced himself as Gaz leaves through the front door, and from the window you watch the lights shine through the night while Gaz moves to stand under the porch. Minutes go by as three figures make their way out from the trees.

Oh, what have you gotten yourself into?

[orthopunkfox]

My great gran made this quilt for me when I was small. The front is a patchwork of heavy cotton cloth while the back is light canvas. It was designed "for little people and their big messes" as my gran used to say, designed to be durable and easy to clean. It was also designed to be put in the fridge or freezer to make it cold. The cool weight often brought much needed relief to a sickly kiddo who battled frequent ear and lung infections with raging fever. I wrapped myself in it in cold nights, held it tight when I was sad, been sick on it when I had stomach flu. It's served as cape, picnic blanket, and camp sleeping bag. It has never once torn nor frayed. I wrapped my oldest child in it when he was sick with croup. Just today, my youngest wiped his jelly-covered face on it. My gran definitely knew what she was doing and made this quilt to last as long as her legacy.

My gran was not a wealthy woman. She grew up very poor, lived fairly poor, and died only slightly less poor. But she took care of the people in her sphere of influence. There was a home for orphaned and troubled boys near her house on Morris Street. Every Christmas she would invite the boys who had no home to her house for a home cooked meal (complete with pie), and a stocking for each which included chocolate, a small toy or game and a piece of citrus fruit they didn't normally get. Her favourite saying was "there's always room for one more at the table, we can add one more potato to the soup, the gravy can be watered down a little more."

I don't think she ever knew the great many lives she touched, not how great an affect she had on people. I think she would've been embarrassed to know. She was a modest woman and just as soon forget her good deeds. But the people she blessed never forgot.

At her funeral dozens and dozens of men came to pay their respects. None of my family knew their names or had ever seen them before. One by one they began to introduce themselves and a story began to piece together. The home had closed decades ago and the boys had grown up, some had left the state. But when one of them found out about my gran's death, they mustered themselves and came from all over. They were her Christmas Boys and they had come to see her one last time.

[maculategiraffe]

so y'all know that with the help of psychotropic medication and marie kondo I have healed a lot of damage and destructive thinking around cleaning / tidying. to the point that now I actively enjoy tidying and organizing. but I'm still figuring stuff out obviously

well I'm out of town again this weekend and staying in the same place as my sister and steve and the baby and my parents. but my parents didn't arrive until like 24 hours after the rest of us. and the afternoon right before my parents were to arrive my sister took the baby for a car nap ride and I was like "while the hurricane is napping I will tidy up!" and put away all his toys from all over the floor in nicely organized bins and did the dishes and cleaned the kitchen and organized the countertops and emptied the cooler bag of snacks and refrigerated the refrigerated stuff and wiped out the bag and hung it upside down to dry. again, I actually enjoy this now. so it wasn't like I was doing it with the express purpose of avoiding my mom's censure but I did think "oh and won't it be nice when my parents get here and everything is all nice and they don't have to worry about stepping on a lego"

and then when they got here I unpacked all the cooler bags they had brought and organized everything nicely in the fridge and put the cold packs in the freezer. because again. I enjoy it. but also I know my mom finds traveling stressful and I did think it was a nice thing to do for her and might ease her stress

and my mom immediately started complaining about other stuff that we hadn't done. and didn't seem to notice anything I HAD done or say anything nice

and weirdly this is also a healing thing for me? because my whole life I felt like my mom's moods and criticism were kind of my fault because I was so bad at this stuff. and now that I'm not so bad at it I'm like okay so this lady is just fucking MOODY

[finchyyy]

Things Stray Kids do/say which makes you fall in love with them again (hyung line)

Reader x Skz Fluff warnings- mentions of scars and injuries

Chan is really observant, if you mention you liking something, that same thing will be within your hands the next day. Whenever, you feel sad Chan will come up to you with the things you have said that you've liked in the past and make your day better. He puts a lot a thought into have he gives to you and overthinks whether you like it or not. He would do anything to see your face bright up. One day you mentioned how you were craving ice cream, you opened the freezer the next day, and guess what? it was filled with tubes of ice cream.

"-Chan why is the fridge filled with tons of ice cream??

-Oh while you were talking with your mother yesterday, I heard that you liked red velvet ice cream, so I got it for you."

Lee Minho is a understanding person, he will try his best to understand you and your insecurities and help you embrace them as well. He will often kiss your scars or past injury spots, he knows how it feels to be insecure over simple imperfections. This man will do anything to make you believe that you are beautiful and that your scars are little checkpoints which highlight the incidents which play a role in the building of your personality. He will notice when you look at yourself for a longer time in the mirror. He is not that good with giving others affection however, in this case, he will make it his goal to make you feel more confident with the help of his actions and words.

Changbin is one of the most competitive people you're ever came across. So whenever, he notices you looking at hung stuff toys in those game stalls, he does anything to win them. By anything, I mean ANYTHING. Whenever he won those games you always stood beside him with your excited figure. You were like his cheerleader, he loved seeing you happy and if you were happy from the toys he won, he will always play those games and waste a lot of money by playing so many times.

Hyunjin is an artist so its does not surprise you when you come across his opened sketchbook laying on the kitchen counter. Curiosity got the best of you, and the next thing you know is that you started looking through his sketchbook. Most of the pages contained little wips of you and him. You flipped the next page only to find a portrait of you smiling. You were so caught up in the moment that you did not realise the artist standing beside you.

"- Snooping I see.

-Ugh, I couldn't help it, you know how much I admire your sketches especially this one.

-Its the minimum I could do,love."

[katsukiizmoon]

Desc: Talkin’ bout Katsuki while you’re pregnant & when you have a daughter

No cause now all I can think about is katsuki with a daughter :( everyone Shutup I’m usually more immune to baby fever but oh god…. >:( katsuki needs to give me a baby girl

I can go into details and I will

Buys a giant wardrobe for her before she’s even born. Has custom made dynamight baby clothes made just for her.

Reads every parenting book known to man and has a binder of development notes!! This man has written down everything from how to cure baby gas to the best learning tools and methods for little ones

Makes freezer prep meals for when you’re post-partum and struggling ! Soup cubes, one pan sheet meals, instant pot dinners, the works. He makes frozen mandu (Korean dumplings) for an easy snack.

SLATHERS you in Shea butter and bio oil throughout your pregnancy, giving you rubs up and down all the time

Begins impulse buying childrens books and toys any time he steps into a store

Your home now has an entire room dedicated to the items he had either BUILT or BOUGHT for your child. Shelves are secured to the wall, filled with every book and pack of flash cards he’s purchased

Lays her down on his chest for quick naps with dragon tales on, humming to soothe her to avoid hics and sniffs from his beloved baby

Calls her “angel” for the longest time but here’s a list of other nicknames he uses: “squirt” , “shithead” , “princess” , “little spark”

Has the baby’s footprints stamped on thick cardstock for every two months she grows, until she hits a year. At a year he begins doing it every 6 months.

Starts teaching her to bake early on, all their favorite treats. They sit afterwards and eat to their hearts content until she inevitably knocks out on his chest watching Disney movies

Let’s her paint his nails as soon as she’s old enough. When she hits an age where it’s appropriate, they begin getting matching pedicures with you every month

Also post partum he spends time fixing you warm baths to soak in and love yourself in, while he holds the little one and makes dinner

Also also when you’re pregnant he literally has a brand new toilet installed to help you so you won’t need a peri bottle as much when you go to the bathroom :(((

Bathroom? Stocked with everything you can imagine. Tiny fridge for your padsicles? Check. Adult diapers? Check. Stool softener? Check. Baby wipes? Check! Anything you need, is stocked to the brim

Makes it mandatory that for the first 7 days of your little one’s life, only you and him will be around the baby. No visitors pressuring you, none of that. He plans the entire week in advance and tries to account for how tired you’ll be. The first thing he tells you to do when you get home is to get some sleep, and you do.

Calls his mom for help when you’re both a little too stressed and has her watch the baby in the play room so the two of you can have an hour nap

Takes you out to different attractions every week and/or has a “mommy day” planned each week to help lessen the chance of post partum depression

I just truly think he’d worship the ground yoj walked on and pave the way for her. He’d tell her how much he loves her every day. I bet he even puts a mild lavender lotion on her before she sleeps to help her rest and relax.

When she’s a newborn and going through the phase of refusing sleep, he gets you in bed and rocks her in the rocking chair until she’s asleep. He also demands the baby SHARE a room with you until she gets to at least 7-8 months. Baby cameras everywhere. Everything is baby proof. If you think it isn’t, it is.

When I die, The first thing I’m doing is having katsuki knock me up so we can live a happy life with a little one.

[callistoscollection]

ICE PLAY

Ice play is a form of temperature play typically involving running ice over the body but can also include insertion, ice baths and more.

Never hold ice against parts of the body that have thinner skin, like genitalia for more than a few seconds.

If you’re a beginner try sucking on an ice cube before kissing or going down on your partner. Running an ice cube over the chest, torso, nipples and thighs. Or sex toys cooled with cold water. Incorporating bondage and/or blindfolds can be fun too.

If you want to use ice as an insertable, the safest thing you can do is not, try using a glass or metal sex toy cooled with cold water or in the fridge, you can also use lube that's been in the fridge too.

Whatever you do, do not put metal toys in the freezer. Frozen metal will freeze together with moist surfaces and can rip your skin.

If you still want to insert ice, make sure you only use a small amount for a short time and dip the ice in a glass of water first or wait for it to melt enough it doesn't stick to your fingers then put it in a condom & use plenty of lube.

No matter how simple you practise ice play make sure you monitor your partner very closely and be ready to warm them up at the slightest sign something is wrong.

Before you practise you should know:

- How to prevent and treat cold burns.

- What hypothermia, frostbite and cold shock look like.

- What to do if someone faints.

- What to do if something goes numb.

A good general rule is to have the ability on hand to reverse whatever you’re doing.

And I feel like I shouldn’t have to say this but never use dry ice on any part of the body.

[samkiszkasfacialhair]

Just You and Me

Just You and Me

Pairing: Sam Kiszka and Female Reader

Summary: Sam discovers the secret to making his infant daughter happy.

Warnings: Girl Dad Sam

Word Count: 2.7k

At around 4 AM you were woken up to the sounds of screaming and crying. It was a combination of the sound of distant cries coming from down the hall and the static sounds of it coming from the baby monitor next to you. 

Before you even opened your eyes, you felt the bed move and heard the sound of your bedroom door opening, followed by the sound of four paws hitting the floor and trotting out the room before the door shut again softly.

The crying continued through the speaker on the monitor but was soon mixed with the sound of Sam’s soft voice. You picked up the monitor and squinted as you looked at the bright light of the screen, giving you a look into your daughter’s nursery. The time on the monitor showed 4:27 AM. 

“Well good morning to you too,” Sam said sweetly to her in a tired voice as he scooped her up from her crib and into his arms. 

He bounced her around for a few minutes, thinking she just needed a little love and some cuddles to go back to sleep. Her crying continued for a bit but faded into whines as Sam comforted her.

“Shhh, come on, sh sh sh. Daddy’s gotcha,” he said softly.

He kissed the top of her head and continued bouncing her around gently in his arms. 

It was becoming clear to Sam that she needed more than just a little rocking back to sleep. 

This wasn’t something Sam was used to. He had only gotten her at night a few times before. And in his defense- he didn’t ever need to. She was a good at sleeping through the night in her own room. For the past few weeks, she had been waking up, however with a little love from either of you, she would fall back asleep quickly. But not this time.

He held her in his left arm, unzipped her sleep sack with his right hand, and gave her diaper a pat.

“Woah, that's a lot of piss,” he laughed. “Let’s get you all fresh. Maybe that’ll make you feel better, hmm? What do you think?” he continued as he walked over to her changing table.

You loved the way he talked to her. He talked to her as if she could understand everything and answer back. 

He laid her down to change her and as he put her down and out of his arms- instantly her crying started up again. He gave her a tube of diaper cream in an attempt to distract her and keep her occupied but she threw it to the ground. Rosie walked over to it and sniffed it out for a few moments before returning to her spot at Sam’s feet.

“I know, I know. I’ll pick you up again in a second,” he said as he held her still with his hand over her stomach as he reached for wipes and a fresh diaper. 

She cried through the entire diaper change and continued crying even when Sam was done changing her and held her again. He gave up on cradling her, figuring she wasn’t going back to sleep any time soon, so he let her sit up.

“We gotta get out of here or you’re gonna wake Mom up,” he groaned as he shifted her from one side of his body to the other and walked out of her bedroom with her. Little did he know, you were already very much awake.

He brought her downstairs into the living area and a second camera picked up his movements and showed the two of them on the screen. 

He took her into the kitchen and opened the freezer. He looked around, pulled out a teething ring, and handed it to her, hoping she’d bite down on it. 

She took it from him, looked at it for a second, let it fall to the ground as she smushed her face into his shoulder and rubbed her tired face on his shirt.

��Okay, we have to learn the phrase ‘No thank you, Dad,’” he said to himself in annoyance as he looked at the frozen toy on the floor and kicked it out of his path. 

Rosie followed the toy as Sam kicked it away and pushed it around on the floor a bit. 

He opened the fridge for another attempt at something that may please her. 

“You wanna eat, Baby? Hm? Are ya hungry?” 

Sam took out all the fixings for a bottle and got to work.

It took him twice as long as normal because he knew if he put her down, the crying would only get worse again. Plus, the baby had a grip on his hair which prevented him from moving his head all the way. He balanced the baby in his left arm while his right hand did everything else. 

Rosie stood at his feet and followed his every move, causing him to trip over her and have to gently nudge her away with his foot so he could get what he needed and move around the kitchen.

“Ugh, Rose, come on,” he groaned as he struggled to twist the cap of the bottle on while Rosie circled around him.

To say he was struggling would be an understatement.

It took everything in you to just watch and not get up and help him. If it was you, you’d scoop her up and feed her without having to make a bottle. Then she’d fall asleep while eating and you'd just place her back into her crib until morning.

But Sam figured you were asleep and he wouldn’t want to wake you up. Besides, you knew he felt bad about himself when you would swoop in with your “mom touch” and make everything okay instantly where it would take him a couple tries at anything before it worked.

It made him feel like he wasn’t good enough. Like he was a bad parent. Like this whole “dad” thing wasn’t for him and he wasn’t cut out for the next 18 years. Like everyone who told him that he wasn’t ready for this at his age was right. And like he was letting down the one little person who matters the most in this world to him, and he didn’t know what to do to fix it.

He wanted to be the one to bring her comfort and happiness for once. And even though it killed you to see her so upset and see him struggle and get frustrated, you figured whether he knew it or not, Sam may have needed to do this on his own more than he needed you to help him right now.

He sat down on the couch with your daughter and laid her in his arms. He held the bottle to her mouth. Instantly, she turned her head away, put her arms in front of her face, and wouldn’t take it. She fought him a few times, turning her head and closing her mouth so that he couldn't even get the bottle near her mouth. She continued crying but it was like a gargle. He didn’t want to force her but after a fresh diaper and a cold toy didn’t soothe her, this was his next best idea.

“I know I’m not Mom, I know. But come on, try for me please. I wish I was sucking on Mom’s tits too, trust me,” he joked, trying to make some fun during a stressful situation. 

She opened her mouth again to cry and Sam shoved the bottle in. Her head shook from the left to the right in an attempt to get it away but once she realized there was milk coming out of it, she took to it.

Now holding a quiet baby, Sam sat back with her in his arms and rested his head on the back of the couch. He closed his eyes and enjoyed the silence. You could see him starting to doze off. 

Any relaxation he felt was over the second she finished the bottle. The empty bottle fell out of her mouth and onto the floor and Sam snapped back awake when her cries started up again.

“Shit,” he said to himself, both surprised and a little mad at himself that he fell asleep with his own child in his arms. 

He sat up and rubbed his eyes with his free hand before moving her over his shoulder to burp her. 

“Come on, be a good girl for me,” he said as he patted and rubbed her back gently.

You couldn’t hear it but she must have burped because Sam pulled her off his shoulder, looked at her, and said, “That was a big one!”

After a while, he wasn’t getting any more out of her and she started to rub her eyes with her hands and rub her face on his shoulder again.

“Are you finally tired, Little One? Yeah? You want to lay down in your swing?” he asked as he walked her over to the swing which was placed right next to an armchair. 

And of course, the second he let her go and put her in the swing to buckle her in, she started crying again. 

He clicked a few buttons on the top of the swing and instantly, it started moving back and forth and playing baby lullaby music. It was piano music that typically sounded nice. But the batteries were fading so the music came out sounding warped.

Sam sat on the floor next to the swing for a few minutes until he had had enough. 

Her cries on top of the terrible sounds of the music finally got to Sam. He slammed his hand on the speaker and hit the button to turn the music off. He had been at this for over an hour with no progress and no end in sight.

A golden hue began lighting up the house from the sunrise outside.

He leaned his back against the chair.

“I changed you, I gave you toys, I fed you, I burped you. I did everything,” he sighed, “What do you want?” he pleaded as he sat next to the swing with her crying and squirming as she glided back and forth in it. 

He put his elbows on his knees and ran his hands through his hair. He tilted his head back and closed his eyes. Now he looked like he was going to cry.

He ran his hands down his face and pulled down on his cheeks so his eyes were now forced open. He kept his hands like that for a second, pulling the skin on his face down. 

The sunlight coming through the living room windows lit up the corner of the room where Sam had a single guitar propped up against the wall. 

It was as if a lightbulb went off in his head.

He got up off the floor, grabbed the guitar, and sat down in the chair next to the swing, resting the guitar in his lap. He pulled his hair up into a bun before picking up the guitar to play it.

“You know,” he began, “Grandma said that when I was a baby, I always fell asleep with your Great Grandpa Frank’s music. So maybe that’ll work for you. Let’s try, hmm?”

He took a deep breath in and let it out slowly before he began.

He started softly plucking at the strings, allowing the house to fill with a beautiful, light song. 

You recognized it right away.

Here Comes the Sun by The Beatles.

Sam played it soft and slowed it down. He started humming the melody as he played.

Little by little, as Sam played, the crying faded once again. But unlike every other time, it faded and didn’t come back. It faded into whines, which faded into sighs, which faded into deep breaths. For the first time since your daughter woke up, everything was at peace.

Sam kept playing, getting a little lost in the music, until he realized what happened. 

He stopped and looked down at the baby sleeping peacefully in the swing next to him. 

He smiled at her and then smiled to himself, looking down at the guitar. You could tell he was proud of himself but even more proud of where his idea came from. 

He placed the guitar on the floor and pressed a button on the swing to slow it down.

“Goodnight, My Angel,” he whispered.

He sat back down on the couch across from her and pulled his feet onto the cushion. He leaned his head on the pillows and pulled a blanket down from the back of the couch and closed his eyes. Rosie jumped up on the couch and rested her head on Sam’s legs. 

At that point, the time on the monitor read 6:15 AM.

You got out of bed and went downstairs to see Sam, Rosie, and your daughter all sound asleep.

Slowly and quietly, you pulled your daughter out of the swing, took her upstairs, and placed her in her crib to sleep safely without waking her up. When you set her down in her crib, as she laid down comfortably for the first time since she woke up, you watched the tiniest smile creep onto her face. It was Sam’s. She had Sam’s smile. 

You waited a few minutes in the room to make sure she was still asleep and then, you went back downstairs to see a snoring Sam curled up on the couch. 

You picked up the guitar, placed it back in the corner of the room, and sat on the couch next to Sam. You brushed your hand over his head and brushed the little hairs at his hairline back with the rest of his hair. 

He took a deep breath in and blinked a few times. He let out a breathy groan as he woke back up again. 

He furrowed his eyebrows in confusion for a second and then sat up to look over at the swing. He gasped and his eyes opened fully when he saw that it was empty but relaxed when you brushed the top of your hand over his cheek and whispered to him.

“Relax,” you said, “She’s still sleeping. I put her upstairs.”

Sam looked at you with half open eyes. They were tired and just a bit swollen. He looked like he was still dreaming. 

“You wanna come back to bed, Daddy?” you asked softly.

He nodded and rubbed his face. 

“Come on,” you whispered.

You got up from the couch and Sam followed behind you. Rosie jumped off the couch and headed for her dog bed by the chair as the two of you lazily walked back upstairs and into bed.

Upon entering your bedroom, Sam threw himself down in bed and cuddled himself up next to you. He pulled you in close and rested his chin right next to your shoulder.

You could feel the warmth of his exhales from his nose and his scratchy beard on your skin.

You reached behind yourself, grabbed the back of his legs, and pushed them in closer to you so his body was completely pressed up against yours.

His hand reached for yours and he placed it in front of your stomach, rubbing little circles on the top of it with his thumb. The movements of his thumb slowed down as he fell into sleep again.

“You’re a good dad, Sam,” you whispered.

“Mm, you think so?” he mumbled into your shoulder.

“I know so,” you assured him. 

He was quiet for a second before he spoke again.

“You were watching on the monitor, weren’t you?” he asked.

“Maybe,” you giggled.

Sam didn’t reply but you felt his mouth form a smile on your shoulder before he gave it a gentle kiss. 

“Love you,” he whispered lazily.

You turned your head over at him to give him a kiss on the lips but when you did, he was already fast asleep. 

His eyes were closed, he was breathing deeply, and his mouth was slightly open. 

You kissed him anyway- just the tiniest, most gentle kiss. 

When you pulled back, you watched the outer corners of his lips tug to form a small smile. It was that same little smile you saw on your daughter when you put her back to sleep. Except, now you were looking at who it came from, her dad, who you both loved more than anyone in the world. 

Songs:

Matt Harke- London’s Song

Author’s Note: With all due respect, Samuel, babe, let me make you a daddy.

Also, the cover art I made from this is based off of edited pictures of Sam I saw on twitter a while ago. They edited the colors and the grain on the original Sam pics. I simply added the baby and the text. If you know who edited the pics of Sam, let me know so I can credit them! 

[sassypotatoe1]

Survival guide for the adhd/depressed/autistic newly established office worker:

Brought to you by a depressed adhd autistic who took 10 months to adjust to office life after starting to work their first full time job.

Food:

We all have trouble with food, no denying it, so how do you manage it? Well there's a couple of ways depending on your individual needs.

If you're like me and you will end up just not eating if you don't have food immediately accessible, keep a snack drawer. Empty an entire drawer in your desk, buy a combination of healthy and less nutritious snack food that's shelf stable in bulk. I typically get a bunch of packets of like two types of potato chips/crisps, a bunch of single serving packets of salted peanuts, single serving packets of dried fruit flakes because the solid dried fruit are a sensory nightmare, and a bag of lollipops. By 10ish when I need my first snack I pop a lollipop, and if I didn't pack lunch I have access to fiber, protein, fat and carbs.

I also sniffed around for a couple of months to find the best deal on safe food takeout, ie a meal that's filling, relatively balanced, cheap and fits my texture and taste sensitivities. When it gets too expensive I find another one. Once a week I allow myself to get that if I didn't pack lunch so I don't end up spending all my money on takeout but still get to eat well enough.

If you're concerned about overeating or eating less nutritious food, get nutritious safe food options. They're typically a bit more expensive and a bit less shelf stable, I keep instant soup with freeze dried veggies in my drawer in the winter, and I have a tub of ensure to make shakes if I feel I'm missing out on some nutrients. Focus more on dried fruits, pretzels, nuts, instant food with veggies and nutrient loaded fruit juice. Get ensure if you can afford it. In a limited way it can act as a nutritious meal replacement, but I mean limited as in once or twice a week. Do not replace all your meals with a nutrition shake.

When you buy fresh produce, process it immediately before it goes into the fridge/freezer. Don't let that head of lettuce wilt and rot. Pull it apart, wash it off, put what you're not using immediately in a ziploc in the freezer if it freezes, and put the rest open in the produce section of your fridge. Not only will it already be ready to use when you use it, if it's not in a bag or container where the moisture is trapped it remains fresh for longer. That or if you can afford it buy pre-processed produce, divide it into serving portions, freeze what can be frozen.

Buy. Ready. Made. Meals. I know microwave dinners are the butt of the depression joke but they're literally life-saving, because when I was really struggling with my depression and ARFID microwave dinners were my only source of nutrition for a while and it literally kept me from actually dying. Do not be ashamed to meet your needs.

Stimming:

Keep some of your fidget toys or stimming items at your desk. I keep my tangle and fidget cube there so I don't pick my eyebrows to hell and back. It doesn't always work but it's better than nothing. Keep chewing gum in your car. Chewing tricks your brain into thinking you're eating, which tells your sympathetic nervous system that you're safe. It helps you focus better on driving and keeps you a bit calmer making your reaction times faster and less impulsive.

Reminders:

Keep a pad of sticky notes on your desk, preferably a neon color, and all the pens you own that you don't care about losing. Set a reminder on your phone calendar, your computer calendar, your email calendar, on a sticky note on your wall, and in your physical diary. No chance of forgetting something if you do that, because you can't miss all of them.

Take some time to figure out your grocery list. What do you typically need in a month? Make a printout of that grocery list and keep it on your fridge and your phone, along with a monthly or weekly calendar reminder to go grocery shopping. Before you head out check what you still have plenty of and preemptively check it off on your phone list so you don't accidentally buy too much of something.

Keep a "what's in my fridge" log on your fridge. It makes you more aware of what's in there, how long it's been in there, and whether you should throw it out or eat it or leave it. Keep a chart of how long foods hold in the fridge beside that log. The log lists what is in the fridge, when it went into the fridge, when the product seal was broken, and the expiry date of the product. No more moldy fridge food.

Miscellaneous:

Assign care tasks to another task that's already a regular habit. Keep your morning meds by the kettle, and make taking out a dose part of the process of making your morning coffee. Pick a task you do daily at work, usually in the morning, and assign wearing your glasses to that task. I need my glasses to proofread the print dummies because the font isn't very friendly, so I accidentally got into the habit of making putting on my glasses part of the proofreading process. Brushing teeth is part of makeup. Showering is part of getting dressed. It's easier to complete these tasks if I don't view them as seperate tasks, but rather as steps in a different task that comes more naturally to me.

I keep sticky notes and pens in my car, as well as in my purse when I use it, so I can make notes of things when I need to. Car care notes go on stickies when I notice the need, then I'm reminded of it every time I'm in the car. I typically don't even have to read the note, I see that there is one and usually remember what it was about. This helps me remember what I need to do to maintain my car, because I have gotten in an accident and forgotten about it and drove around with a warped front fender for a month. I currently have a sticky note to get my tire pressure checked when I go home from work tonight on my dash.

That's all I have but TL:DR allow yourself to meet your needs without shame, no matter how strange or childish they seem, and find loopholes to your behavior for the best outcome for your health, safety and productivity. Like I said in the intro it took me 10 months to figure out these, so don't be afraid to take the time to figure out what works for you. It'll be absolutely worth it.

[4veslil]

Headcanons | Paul Lahote | You're Paul's SO and Neurodivergent

A/N: Hello! I thought this would be a great way to introduce myself to tumblr! I am currently writing a slow burn Paul Lahote Fic but to engage with the Twilight Fandom more I decided to do this! If you are interested in my VolturiOC/Paul Lahote Fic though here's the link! This is my first time doing Headcanons but please bare with me! Also if you have any requests I am willing to write for every Twilight character for preferences, imagines (<1.5k words), blurbs, drabbles etc. I will NOT write smut, not comfy with it and even if I did put an dni, children aren't stupid, we all faked our ages online once upon a time. All I ask is dni if you are underage! This blog 18+ only! Thank you for clicking on this and hopefully, I will hear some requests soon! Without further ado, ENJOY! ★ MASTER LIST HERE ★ P.S. Bullet points with a * is based off my own ND. Hope you don't mind!

This is new territory for Paul so he does what he does best- panics, gets irritated that he's panicking; get's angry when he can't calm down; goes for a run before finally, finding himself sitting at a library computer (in that order).

He sits at the library for hours researching before he's got a notebook of information on neurodivergence and enough questions for you to find it endearing.

He also takes out a few books written by people with ASD and ADHD and reads them front to back before skimming through them again to take notes.

When you get back home he's ready and puts you in the hot seat.

By the end he knows the normal stuff like favourite foods, animal and colours but also the textures you avoid, your quirks, your favourite fidget toys, what makes you overstimulated; everything that makes you tick.

You woke up the next morning to Paul ripping the tags off all your clothes, letting you know he's ordered new pillows for the living room to replace the velvet ones; he also got reusable cotton pads for the bathroom.

He keeps a hairband on his wrist for when your hair tickles your neck and causes your tick*

Paul also ordered some special ear plugs. He gets multiple- one for your backpack, one for his car's glove compartment and one pair to have on his person.

Paul also asked what your favourite fidget toys are and did the same as the earplugs.

Paul got you matching keyrings with the same fidget toy attached. His is black and yours is your favourite colour.

Paul knows a diary, schedule or to-do list doesn't work with you. He makes household tasks sound like a secret Pack mission, he makes chores fun.

Paul makes sure to put post-its about the house, sets your reminders on his own phone and reminds you gently. He knows you getting annoyed at the reminders isn't personal.

He double (more like triple) checks his notebook before he gets you something.

All his gifts have something to do with your special interest

Any clothes he gets you have tags removed and washed with your favourite detergent before he gift wraps them.

Paul is more than prepared for a break down, he doesn't try to touch you during those.

He knows not to feel rejected when you flinch away or say no to a hug. He just smiles and makes sure not to be too loud or make sudden movements around you.

Paul asked about masking and he could tell you were lying when you said you don't mask around him.

Paul takes you hiking to a secluded place in the forest and phases into a wolf if you've had a bad week. He lets you lay on him and read, just so you can unmask and relax. You find it easier to unmask when he isn't human.

You can go quiet and Paul learns to get comfortable in the silence, silence used to be the calm before the storm, now he sees it as the storm passing by at a distance.

Paul knows you hate touching carboard that's been in the fridge or freezer, after food shopping you find he's opened everything and repackaged it.*

Paul speaks straightforwardly, his communication is clear, especially when it's important or knows you're already overstimulated/overwhelmed.*

When you meet the Pack Paul hates how confused you look when some of the banter goes after your head- he tells you not to force yourself to laugh, says he finds it funny when you don't humour the boys.

The Pack started taking advantage of things going over your head, when Paul pointed it out you shrugged it off because it was only a bit of banter.

Paul pretended to leave it but roughed up the Pack (more than usual) when they were sparring, or would accidentally ram into them while running.

The Pack say he's whipped when they see memories of Paul letting you pet him in wolf form.

At Christmas Jared gets you a pink collar with studs for him, teasing you of course. While you're confused (and distracted) Paul yeets it at Jared's head.

When he gives a gift- of course it's something from your latest hyper fixation.

You get overwhelmed at the Pack's beach hang outs. You are not familiar with everyone's imprints and you get anxious.

You both sit a little away from the Pack and their imprints, silently laying together or drawing in the sand.

Paul always makes sure you're included in the conversation when someone approaches.

He holds you tight in his arms when you're feeling agitated because he knows you like to be squeezed, it grounds you.

Of course, when he found this out he ordered you a weighted blanket.

Paul wants to know everything, all your likes and dislikes- what's safe and what's not.

Paul smiles ear to ear when you tell him he's listed in the "safe" category, he notes it down with a smug expression.

But his face (half-)teasingly drops when you joke he's a close second to your all-time, favourite movie character.

He loves how your mind works, sometimes out of the blue you'll say something so off topic and he'll make you explain where you got that- he's fascinated by it and how easily one thing links to the other.

When the bad days happen he makes sure to just be there, knowing not to touch you- that you just want him by your side.

On those days he makes all your safe foods and separates them on the plate based on your specific eating criteria. He doesn't entirely understand but doesn't tease you for it either.*

He shares your safe food list with Emily because he knows you get embarrassed about eating in public- you used to get teased about how plain and boring it was.*

He goes back to the public library to look up the quiet shopping hours at your favourite stores and what restaurants have your safe foods.

Paul wants to understand everything about you and where it comes from, he fills up one notebook after the after and doesn't let you peek inside.

You try to reason they're all about you so you should get to read them, he still refuses.

The day you finally manage to get a hold of his notebook, you close it after reading the first page. On it is written: "Notebook #3 - everything I know about future Mrs Lahote"

[gamerwoman3d]

Dear Gamer Woman 3d.

Can I please know if it's inadvisable to put any popsicle up my butthole or just one with caffeine, and why?

Thank you

Butthole in Bchicago

Well I'm glad you asked.

You see, Popsicles of any kind are made by dropping the temperature of a liquid until the molecules kinda crystalize into a solid. The temperature inside a human butthole is generally between 97.5 F (36.4 C) and 97.9 F (36.6 C), whereas Ice can be anywhere below 32 F (0 C).

The skin inside the butthole is different from the skin on, say, your hand; it is thinner, permeable, and its job is to absorb as much liquid from the waste products in your colon as possible to prevent dehydration.

Not only can an ice object stick to these walls, similar to how an idiot child's tongue might stick to a frozen lamp post, once stuck, the thin flesh has a much higher chance of tearing.

Now while the popsicle might begin to melt inside you, and you might think "oh now it will be slick and wet and that'll lubricate it!" you could be ... pun intended ... sorely mistaken. Remember, the stuck flesh in question has one job: To suck water out of your poopies to stop you from dehydrating while expelling waste from the body.

So the more good ol' H20 in the popsicle, the more it will just be absorbed as it melts, which will leave it stuck. In fact, as your body absorbed the liquids but not the abrasive solid crystals, it could get even MORE stuck, and cause MORE micro-abrasions. Abrasions and cuts in the colorectal tract are bad news because of the bacteria in the tract- any cut can get infected or end in sepsis. So while it melts, it isn't guaranteed to lubricate you if it's made of anything aside from pure frozen anal lubricant. And even if it were made of pure anal lube, it's still probably a bad idea becaaaauuuse -

It's still a weak, brittle solid, with a crystalline structure. If you've ever dropped an ice cube into a warm liquid, you notice it cracks. Those cracks have sharp edges, that can cut or pinch the flesh inside you. And because the inside of the body stays over 90f/35c, it isn't impossible for those cracks to happen.

All that said, I know for a fact that there are plenty of kinksters who might disagree with me. Yes, people have survived putting all sorts of weird stuff inside them. People have also survived climbing to the top of mount Everest! I'm just saying it's a bad idea to ignore all the frozen bodies around the precipice. The ones who made it to the top AND BACK DOWN had help AND luck on their side.

Likewise, the kinksters that I know that DO fuck around with weird butt stuff and weird ice stuff and whatnot, are usually doing so in kink communities with one or more doctor in the community, and are surrounded with multiple EMTs around them during such activities. So if you INSIST on doing the inadvisable thing, at least try to find a trustworthy medic in your kink community to accompany you on your misadventure in case it causes an actual medical emergency.

But another rule of thumb, is if it feels rough to the touch (as many Popsicles would after you suck on them a bit) then it will not feel good in your butthole.

The TL:DR is Yes. It is inadvisable to put any popsicles in your butthole. If it's just the cold sensation you're looking for, I might recommend at best putting a body-safe toy or body-safe lubricant in a ziplock bag in the fridge for a bit.

NOT the freezer.

I wish you the best of luck, Butthole in Bchicago! Stay safe and keep asking questions. Such questions can safe a butt life.

~gamerwoman3d

[katsukiizmoon]

Katsuki BKG + Neurodivergent Reader

(random rambles and hcs)

Buys CLEAR glass containers to put leftovers in the fridge and puts a cute sticky pad on the fridge to remind you that they’re there !

Helps you label everything to avoid doom boxes

Biweekly clean outs to get rid of any clutter you’re getting anxious over !! Yea !!

Keeps big beautiful display cabinets for your favorite items (toys, figures, fossils, bugs, etc!)

Sees sensory overload from a mile away and offers to take over to let you cool down. Reminds you where the earphones/headphones are !! Also keeps weighted blankets, etc in the house

Speaking of sensory he memorizes your favorite sensory toys and remembers to buy a few here and there! Moon sand ! Slime ! Orbz! Whatever ! Yea!

Is not afraid to watch the same movie/shows over and over with you. He still gets time to watch his own shows with you, of course, you’re more than happy to but he doesn’t mind watching your favorites!

Reminds you to eat when he knows you’ve been fixated on something. Whether it be one of your favorite things or something new you’re obsessed with, he’s already prepared with easy to make, little prep meals in the fridge/freezer.

Keeps safe foods in the house at all times. Not negotiable, they stay in the house and if you run low he stocks back up immediately !!

Takes you on nature walks/zoos/aquariums/whatever your favorite thing is to do/ dates ! If he knows you’ve been struggling lately with motivation, it’s a no brainer to take you somewhere you’ll feel the happiest. Let’s you pick stuff from the gift shop easy!

GIVES U THE MENU BEFORE U GO ANYWHEREEEEEE!!! He’s literally got menus printed to hand you before you go so you’re not anxious!!

Always asks you if you’d like a booth or table !! Does the talking so you don’t feel awkward!! Ya!

Remembers what textures you like/dislike! Microfiber/microfleece he never makes u touch!! Cause what the fuck is with that texture making my teeth itch

Let’s you help make weekly meal plans so neither of you get too caught up and forget to eat ! Yup yup!

CARRIES FIDGET TOYS IN HIS POCKET!! I said what I SAID! In the center console of his car he keeps a spare of noise cancelling headphones, teethers for when you need to chew, fidget spinners/cubes/pop it’s/ etc!