#pumpkin cracker bread

[blackirishweab]

Pumpkin Cracker Bread

[wanderer-chronicles]

Pumpkin cracker bread:

[stevviefox]

It’s our Dylan!

This recipe sounds pretty good.

[voidingintotheshout]

A three ingredient spiced pumpkin bread.

[coffee-mouse]

[accidentally missed lunch yesterday]

[ask-ciaphas-cain]

As a professional AuHD haver, I think that before any recipe can call itself "quick and easy" it needs to be made by at least one neurodivergent person and one person with an illness or disability that limits the amount of work they can do in a kitchen.

Caramelizing onions is NOT quick and easy. Having to chop and prepare more than one kind of vegetable (some days even ONE vegetable) is NOT quick and easy. Having to make sure there's no bad textured fats and tendons in the chicken thighs is NOT easy. I'm just going to name and shame the New York fucking Times for calling matar paneer a quick weeknight dish ok.

To me, quick and easy is a bunch of things I can throw in a pot or pan and leave alone with minimal oversight and minimal cleaning up afterwards. I can count on one hand how many recipes I've found that are actually quick and easy.

Never mind the grocery shopping, which can be its own separate post.

[celestial-sadgirl]

Happy Canadian Thanksgiving!

I just cried from how good my food was. And yes I made most of it myself 😌.

[exactlystickytrash]

 Buy Premium Breads Online Delhi NCR Pumpkin Seed Cracker & Garlic Bread Online Delhi & India - Frugivore

Buy Premium Breads Online India - The freshest fruits, vegetables, juices & dairy straight from our trusted farms direct to your door. Our unique fulfilment process ensures our incredibly fresh products arrive at our customers doorstep in perfect condition, ready to savour and enjoy.

READ MORE...Grocery Online | Online Grocery Shopping in Delhi NCR | Frugivore

[literaryvein-reblogs]

Writing Reference: Food History

B.C.

10,000 - almonds, cherries, bread, flour, soup

8,000 - wheat ⚜ 7,000 - wine, beer, pistachios, pig, goat, sheep, lard

6,500 - cattle domestication, apples ⚜ 6,000 - tortilla, dates, maize

5,000 - honey, ginger, quinoa, avocados, potatoes, milk, yogurt

4,000 - focaccia, watermelons, grapes, pomegranates

3,200 - chicken domestication ⚜ 3,000 - butter, onion, garlic, apricots

2,737 - tea ⚜ 2,500 - olive oil, seaweed, duck ⚜ 2,300 - saffron

2,000 - peaches, liquorice, marshmallow, pasta, ham, sesame seeds

1,500 - chocolate, vanilla ⚜ 1,200 - sugar ⚜ 1,000 - mangoes, oats, pickles

900 - pears, tomatoes ⚜ 700 - cinnamon ⚜ 600 - bananas, poppy seeds

500 - artichokes ⚜ 400 - pastries, appetizers, vinegar

300 - parsley ⚜ 200 - turkeys, asparagus, rhubarb ⚜ 65 - quince

1st—13th Century

1st Century - chestnuts, lobster, crab, shrimp, truffles, blueberries, raspberries, capers, kale, blood (as food), fried chicken, foie gras, French toast, omelettes, rice pudding, flan, cheesecake, pears in syrup

3rd Century - lemons ⚜ 5th - pretzels ⚜ 6th - eggplant

7th Century - spinach, kimchi ⚜ 9th - coffee, nutmeg

10th Century - flower waters, Peking duck, shark's fin soup

11th Century - baklava, corned beef, cider, lychees, seitan

12th Century - breadfruit, artichokes, gooseberries

13th Century - ravioli, lasagne, mozzarella, pancakes, waffles, couscous

14th—19th Century

14th Century - kebabs, moon cakes, guacamole, pie, apple pie, crumpets, gingerbread

15th Century - coconuts, Japanese sushi and sashimi, pineapples, marmalade, risotto, marzipan, doughnuts, hot dogs

16th Century - pecans, cashews (in India), Japanese tempura, vanilla (in Europe), fruit leather, skim milk, sweetbreads, salsa, quiche, teriyaki chicken, English trifle, potato salad

17th Century - treacle, pralines, coffee cake, modern ice cream, maple sugar, rum, French onion soup, cream puffs, bagels, pumpkin pie, lemonade, croissants, lemon meringue pie

18th Century - root beer, tapioca, French fries, ketchup, casseroles, mayonnaise, eggnog, soda water, lollipops, sangria, muffins, crackers, chowder, croquettes, cupcakes, sandwiches, apple butter, souffle, deviled eggs

19th Century - toffee, butterscotch, cocoa, Turkish delight, iodized salt, vanilla extract, modern marshmallows, potato chips, fish and chips, breakfast cereal, Tabasco sauce, Kobe beef, margarine, unsalted butter, Graham crackers, fondant, passionfruit, saltwater taffy, milkshakes, pizza, peanut butter, tea bags, cotton candy, jelly beans, candy corn, elbow macaroni, fondue, wedding cake, canapes, gumbo, ginger ale, carrot cake, bouillabaisse, cobbler, peanut brittle, pesto, baked Alaska, iced tea, fruit salad, fudge, eggs Benedict, Waldorf salad

20th Century

1901 - peanut butter and jelly ⚜ 1904 - banana splits ⚜ 1905 - NY pizza

1906 - brownies, onion rings ⚜ 1907 - aioli

1908 - Steak Diane, buttercream frosting ⚜ 1909 - shrimp cocktail

1910 - Jell-O (America's most famous dessert)

1910s - orange juice ⚜ 1912 - Oreos, maraschino cherries, fortune cookies

1912 - Chicken a la King, Thousand Island dressing

1914 - Fettuccine Alfredo ⚜ 1915 - hush puppies

1917 - marshmallow fluff ⚜ 1921 - Wonder Bread, zucchini

1919 - chocolate truffles ⚜ 1922 - Vegemite, Girl Scout cookies

1923 - popsicles ⚜ 1924 - frozen foods, pineapple upside-down cake, Caesar salad, chocolate-covered potato chips

1927 - Kool-Aid, s'mores, mayonnaise cake ⚜ 1929 - Twizzlers

1930s - Pavlova cakes, Philly cheese steak, Pigs in blankets, margaritas, banana bread, Cajun fried turkey ⚜ 1931 - souffle, refrigerator pie

1933 - chocolate covered pretzels ⚜ 1936 - no-bake cookies

1937 - Reubens, chicken Kiev, SPAM, Krispy Kreme

1938 - chicken and waffles ⚜ 1939 - seedless watermelon

1941 - Rice Krispies treats, Monte Cristo sandwiches ⚜ 1943 - nachos

1946 - chicken burgers, tuna melts, Nutella ⚜ 1947- chiffon cake

1950s - chicken parm, Irish coffee, cappuccino, smoothies, frozen pizza, diet soda, TV Dinners, ranch dressing ⚜ 1951 - bananas foster

1953 - coronation chicken ⚜ 1956 - German chocolate cake, panini

1957 - Quebec Poutine ⚜ 1958 - Instant ramen noodles, crab rangoon, lemon bars ⚜ 1960s - beef Wellington, green eggs and ham, red velvet cake

1963 - black forest cake ⚜ 1964 - Belgian waffles, Pop Tarts, Buffalo wings, ants on a log, pita bread ⚜ 1965 - Gatorade, Slurpees

1966 - chocolate fondue ⚜ 1967 - high fructose corn syrup

1970s - California rolls, pasta primavera, tiramisu ⚜ 1971 - fajitas

1975 - hicken tikka masala ⚜ 1980 - turducken

1980s - Panko, portobello mushrooms, bubble tea, chicken nuggets, Sriracha, Red Bull energy drink, everything bagels

1990s - artisan breads, Jamaican jerk ⚜ 1991 - turkey bacon, chocolate molten lava cake, earthquake cake ⚜ 1993 - broccolini

1995 - Tofurkey ⚜ 1997 - grape tomatoes

21st Century

2002 - flat iron steak, tear-free onions ⚜ 2007 - Kool-Aid pickles, cake pops

2008 - Mexican funnel cake ⚜ 2013 - cronuts, test tube burgers

Source ⚜ Writing Notes & References

[dunmeshistash]

Dungeon Meshi - "Dungeon Meals" from volumes 1 to 4

More info under the cut

Decided to compile the dungeon meals anyway. These are from chapter 1 to 28 (Volumes 1 to 4)

There were a total of 24 "meals" (counting the special panels) in the 28 chapters. Meal is anything that gets the named panel, so kelpie soap giant frog suit and Falin skeleton count (cause that's funny). I'm using EHScans pages because they have a better resolution usually (and for consistency)

Anyway here's the meals of each chapter and who made them.

Chapter 1 - Hot pot Meal: Huge Scorpion and Walking Mushroom Hot Pot Cooked by: Mostly Senshi but Laios started it.

Chapter 2 - Tart Meal: Man-Eating Plant Tart Cooked by: Senshi

Chapter 3 - Roast Basilisk Meal: Roast Basilisk Cooked by: Senshi

Chapter 4 - Omelet Meal: Mandrake & Basilisk Omelet Cooked by: Senshi

Chapter 5 - Kakiage Meal: Mandrake Kakiage & Giant Bat Tempura Cooked by: Senshi and Chilchuck

Chapter 7 - Living Armor II Meal: Living Armor Full Course Meal, consisting of: Dwarf-Style Stir Fry, Steamed Living Armor, Living Armor Soup and Grilled Living Armor Cooked by: Senshi (Others helped with prepping)

Chapter 8 - Simmered Cabbage Meal: Vegetable Lunch, Fresh off the Golem Fields, consisting of: Simmered Whole Cabbage and Turnip Salad. Cooked by: Senshi (Others helped with prepping)

Chapter 9 - Orcs Meal: Stolen Vegetables, Simmed Cabbage & Chicken with a side of Plundered Bread Cooked by: Senshi, Marcille, Laios, Chilchuck, Zon and other Orc Ladies

Chapter 10 - Snacks Meal: All Natural♡Delicious Treasure Bug Snacks, consisting of: Treasure Bug Nest Jam, Coin Bug Crackers and Pearl Centipede Skewers Cooked by: Senshi (Laios helped by.. watching)

Chapter 11 - Sorbet Meal 1: Deluxe♪Multicultural Holy Water Cooked by: Senshi Meal 2: Protective Ward! Spirit Dispelling Sorbet Cooked by: Senshi and Laios

Chapter 12 - Palace Cuisine Meal: Palace Cuisine Full Course Meal, consisting of: Sautéed Fish with Soybeans, Pumpkin Soup, Fruit, Golden Wheat Bread, Golden cow Cheese and Roast Duck Cooked by: Palace Cooks? Painter? Magic?

Chapter 13 - Boiled in Salt Water Meal: Boiled Mimic Cooked by: Senshi

Chapter 14 - Kelpie "Meal": Kelpie Tallow Soap Cooked by: Marcille

Chapter 15 - Porridge Meal: Zosui Made from Dropped Barley Cooked by: Laios

Chapter 16 - Broiled with Sauce Meal: Giant Parasite from Giant Kraken: Grilled Plain and Kabayaki Style Cooked by: Senshi (Laios Helped with prepping the skewers and ate one raw and suffered)

Chapter 18 - Grilled Meat Meal: Grilled Kelpie Cooked by: Senshi

Chapter 19 - Tentacles "Meal": Tentacles With Vinegar Dressing Cooked by: Namari (with Laios instructions)

Chapter 20 - Stew Meal: Tentacle & Kelpie Stewed in an Undine Cooked by: Marcille (With Senshi's help)

Chapter 21 - Giant Frogs Meal 1: Tentacle Gnocchi Cooked by: Senshi Meal 2: Frog Suit Cooked by: Laios and Chilchuck

Chapter 23 - Red Dragon I Meal: Let's Cutlet the Dragon to Pieces! Cooked by: Senshi

Chapter 27 - Red Dragon V "Meal": Falin & Warg Skelletons Cooked by: Laios & Marcille (Red Dragon helped clean up the bones really well)

Chapter 28 - Red Dragon VI Meals: Roast Red Dragon, Pizza Bread with Onions and Dragontail Soup Cooked by: Senshi

The chapters that had no "meal is done" panel were chapters

6 - Living Armor I

17 - Raspberries

22 - Above Ground

24 - Red Dragon II

25 - Red Dragon III

26 - Red Dragon IV

Mostly the multipart chapters, there was food eaten in 17 and 22 but no special panel for them, 17 is the titular raspberries and 22 the barmaids serve them a meal they eat right at the end

The chapter with more than one "meal" panels (not more than one meal prepared just more than one special panel for the meals) were:

11 - Sorbet with Holy Water and Sorbet

21 - Giant Frog with Gnocchi and Frog Suit

And the party stats are:

Senshi: 17 meals cooked, all of them food

Chilchuck: 3 "meals" cooked, 2 of them were food, 1 of them was a Frog Suit

Marcille: 4 "meals" cooked, 2 of them were food, 1 of them was soap and 1 of them was Falin skeleton reconstruction. She made the soap by herself and the stew mostly by herself

Laios: 5 "meals" cooked , 3 of them were food, 1 of them was a frog suit and 1 was Falin skeleton reconstruction. He also helped with 4 other meals (kinda) and 1 of them he made by himself (The zosui)

Out of the 24 meals in these 4 volumes, 21 were food and 3 were "other"

Out the 21 food meals Senshi made 17 of them, Laios made 1 Marcille made 1 and the other 2 was Namari and Living Painting Cooks.

I often get confused with numbers so if I said anything wrong feel free to correct me! Might do less volumes for the next post we'll see

[iliveinprocrasti-nationn]

hello fellow jews of tumblr. poll time

[coldxxwinter]

Starter for: anyone ( @cardinalstart ) Event: Pumpkin Palooza

Having grown up in Cardinal Hill, Winter was well-accustomed to Pumpkin Palooza, and he loved it. Every year he went, with his family when they were around and alone or with friends when they weren't, and the only year he'd missed it was when he'd had mono during the festival when he was...well, Winter couldn't remember how old, just knew it was sometime in his early teens. And that had only been because his family had forced him to, once even catching him sneaking out of his bedroom window. Otherwise, Winter spent as much time at the festival as he could every year, with Pumpkin Palooza being one of the happiest things in his life right now. And honestly...Winter felt like he could use as many happy things as possible right now.

Ever since he'd begun beekeeping when he was 12, Winter had spent at least some of the time at the festival markets. He had stocked up on honey, some of it even from last year because it hadn't quite been ready for the market then, and now he had a variety. After setting up his stall, Winter sat down behind it and waited, proud of what he had to sell. And it didn't take long for someone to approach. "Hey!" Winter greeted the potential customer, smiling at them. "Are you looking for anything specific? If not, let me suggest the pumpkin honey or the pumpkin spice honey, which sound the same but actually aren't. And yes, I do free samples." As he said that last part, Winter gestured to the small bowls of honey with labels in front of them, along with a variety of dipping options such as bread, naan, crackers, and the like.

[livebloggingmydescentintomadness]

i was just reading a fic where someone said they needed to set aside their pasta dough "to rise", and that made my eye twitch badly enough that i would like to give you all a quick lesson about dough for all your writing needs.

without getting into fussy details, there are four basic types of dough/batter. yeasted doughs, quick breads, laminated/pastry doughs, and unleavened doughs.

the only one of those that ever needs to rise is yeasted dough.

yeasted doughs are, as the name suggests, leavened with yeast. yeast is a microorganism that, when activated in water, feeds on sugars to produce gas. that gas, when trapped in dough, creates bubbles. most breads are yeasted, as are things like bagels, rolls, pizza crust, soft pretzels, english muffins, etc. yeasted doughs are also typically made by kneading, a process that develops the sticky gluten in wheat and makes the dough strong enough to hold onto itself and gives a pleasantly chewy result. (sourdough is also yeasted, but it's made by capturing wild yeast from the air rather than using prepackaged yeast.)

quick breads are leavened with baking soda and/or baking powder. these agents do not need rise time, as the chemical reaction happens when they are introduced to water/acid and heat. muffins, pancakes, cake, and sweet breads like banana, pumpkin, and zucchini are quick breads, and not only are they not kneaded, they shouldn't be overworked. overworking activates the gluten in the wheat, which isn't desired in these soft, tender breads. cookies and brownies would go under this umbrella as well.

laminated/pastry dough is leavened by thin layers of cold butter reaching a quick boiling point and releasing a steam that separates the layers of dough. this effect can be most clearly seen in something like a croissant, though croissants are also yeasted. pie crusts, most biscuits (the american kind), scones, and many other types of pastries are made this way. any time a recipes instructs you to "cut" butter into flour, this is what you're doing. phyllo, the type of dough used to make baklava, uses a similar process where oil or melted butter is brushed between paper-thin sheets of dough.

unleavened dough is exactly that, unleavened. there is nothing in this dough that makes it rise. pasta, many crackers, some flatbreads like tortillas - they don't rise at all. you do, on the other hand, typically have to let it rest for at least fifteen minutes, as the mixing of the dough creates elastic gluten strands that will resist attempts to roll it out.

special mention: whipped egg whites. when eggs are whipped into stiff peaks, they become filled with air, and some recipes use whipped egg whites folded carefully into batter as a leavener. angel food cake, for example, is leavened with nothing but egg whites. many cake recipes use this technique, as it creates a very light and delicate result.

SO. please take this knowledge and incorporate it in your writing as you will. thank you. <3

ps: things that are gluten free never require kneading, as there is no gluten to develop. gluten free baking is an alchemy which i do not pretend to understand.

[finniestoncrane]

💜🍴 Finnie's 1.5k Follower Event 🍴💚

CLOSED by health inspector

even though it felt like this took forever it really didn't because i've only been on here and writing for just over a year, and i'm so grateful that people still follow me despite my personality as a whole lmao, i wanted to do something silly and goofy so here's my prompt list for my milestone ;-; hello and welcome to the vill-inn, gotham's newest restaurant (and definitely 100% not a money-laundering front for nefarious rogue activity no sirree u-u) please come on in and peruse the menu and let us know what you want to eat!! send in your order + reader/insert gender/pronouns/genitals too! the restaurant is now closed as well as writing headcanons and drabbles, i'm also doing a little give away! so anyone who asks off anon (or not, check the specials menu below) i'll enter into a little silly draw for a 1k commission and pick 3 winners u-u 🔞minors dni🔞 • masterlist • kofi link • tag: finnie1500 (to follow or to block)

Hello, welcome to Vill-Inn, how will you be DIE-ning with us today?

Sit-In [drabbles/short fic]

Takeout [bullet-point/free form story/headcanon style]

Delivery [surprise me]

Great! Wonderful! What can I get you to drink? And don't say fear toxin! (I'm this close to quitting...) (pick 1)

Water [hurt/comfort]

Soda [angst]

Milkshake [fluff]

Signature Cocktail [smut/pwp]

Black Coffee [doesn't matter/surprise me]

And what will you be having for your MAIM course? (pick 1, feel free to specify the version)

Question Mark Shaped Nuggies [riddler]

Sushi Platter [penguin]

Pumpkin Ravioli [scarecrow]

Surf and Turf [two face]

Arroz con Pollo [bane]

Steak [victor zsasz]

Cucumber Sandwiches [mad hatter]

Garden Salad [poison ivy]

Gut Buster Burger [harley quinn]

Gazpacho [mr freeze]

Plain Noodles with Butter [john doe]

Gumbo [killer croc]

BBQ Platter [captain boomerang]

And what loyal side(kick)s are you having with that? (pick up to 4)

🍟 Regular Fries [waking up with them]

🧇 Waffle Fries [sex in a public place]

🍠 Sweet potato Fries [visiting them in Arkham/Blackgate]

➰ Curly Fries [only one bed]

🍁 Poutine [slow dancing]

🥔 Potato Skins [at a party]

🍕 Pizza Bites [tending to wounds]

🍗 Chicken Wings [confession/confessing feelings]

🍔 Sliders [exacting revenge]

🌭 Mini Dogs [hate/angry sex]

🍤 Popcorn Shrimp [hugs from behind]

🐔 Chicken Strips [oral sex/how they give and receive]

🍿 Cheese Popcorn [bite marks/marking kink]

🥒 Deep Fried Pickles [sloppy kisses]

🧅 Blooming Onion [being rejected]

🍘 Rice Crackers [choking]

🍞 Bread Rolls [blood play]

🧄 Garlic Bread [straddling]

🥖 Breadsticks [neck/wrist kisses]

🥪 Half Sandwich [giving/receiving praise]

🥣 Soup [argument]

🍜 Noodles [cuddles]

🍚 Steamed Rice [denial]

🦪 Oysters [rough sex]

🍣 Sushi Sampler [edging/orgasm denial]

🌽 Corn on the Cob [instructional masturbation]

🥕 Honey Glazed Carrots ["open your mouth"]

🥗 Green Salad ["do you need a hand?"]

🍅 Tomato Salad ["i have to go"]

🍏 Fruit Salad ["i shouldn't have to ask"]

🍆 Roasted Veg ["i've never done this before"]

🥦 Seared Broccoli ["i hate you"]

🧀 Cheese Platter ["it's too late"]

🍖 Meat Plate ["i've never wanted anything more"]

🍄 Sauteed Mushrooms ["do you want it rough or gentle?"]

🥑 Guacamole ["please don't leave"]

🥜 Toasted Peanuts ["i want to hear you"]

🥓 Bacon Bits ["i didn't say stop"]

💚 Specials Menu 💚

I'm Here For A Blind Date [tell me a bit about yourself and i'll do a character pairing for who you're having lunch with]

Can I Get A Seat At the Buffet? [i don't have an idea/want to ask off anon, but i want to be included in the draw - this message won't be answered]

thanks for visiting, and please feel free to tip your wait staff 💜

[hana-bobo-finch]

woah!!!!! it’s pdbc characters lore dump time (can’t call em OCs when half of the ones listed are technically not……….whatever)

tis but a brief summary of a few characters bc I can’t get into them fully, or we’d be here all day. but nonetheless, quick overviews and quick doodles. just because.

uurghghghg first of all Gourdie. I think I’ve mentioned her before? I love her heehee. I would get into the whole fish daughter more but she doesn’t have a set design yet soooo. anyway yeah Gourdie. she is great. she somehow survives by the end but at what cost!!! did not mention it here but one other thing is that she’s accidentally killed someone!!! Whoops!!! It was in self defense, kinda, but even with the almost nonexistent morals most of my characters have that’s still a universal no no, so she never told anyone and blamed it on a bear attack (why a bear would choose to kill someone by throwing a rock at them instead of, yknow, mauling them, is something that was somehow never questioned). anyway I love her

mmmm next up is less of a fleshed out character and more so just…whatever it is. Couldn’t really get into the details of it all here but maybe I will in the future cause I think the illusions are cool………mostly just mentioning this fella bc he’s important to The Lore. Also noooo I can’t believe I forgot to mention it here, but like I said before, Turtlemeister was (maybe) the one who summoned this thing in the first place!!

my beloved……uuuuuuuuuuuuuuu love her SO much. hey guys look it’s one of those ocs that aren’t technically original. Don’t even ask how I managed to twist a character who was in the source material for 7 panels into one of my favorite characters, I don’t know either and I don’t want to think about it too hard bc it makes me feel like a very bizarre person. I wish I could get into her more she is SO awesome and funny. I feel like she comes across as really depressing in the description but she really isn’t lmao she might be a Little traumatized but no more than everyone else….she’s just chillin half the time. UUUURRGHH love her so much……………unfortunately she is, as I said, dead. anyway who’s up next

OH GREAT HEAVENS.

NOT EVEN GONNA TRY TO FIT EVERYTHING ABOUT THIS FREAK IN ONE IMAGE. WHAT THE HELL. TOP 10 PUMPKIN DADDY OF ALL TIME. ERM. UH. WGHERE DO I STAFT. HUH. UHHHHHHH so he is objectively the best and if you disagree you’re wrong. favorite character ever he is the only reason PDBC exists. genuinely will not be able to list even half the things about this pumpkin bastard but I will rapid fire go over whatever pops into my head first

Has a citrus fruit addiction. Allergic to horses. License plate is NOVFD. once ate part of his own leg by mistake because it was in a roast beef sandwich at a concert. is scared of gloves (except for one (allegedly) magical glove named Lucretius). Is scared of King Arthur and the knights of the round table. was once a professional wrestler but had to quit because his opponent Tried To Fucking Kill Him. That’s kinda an important aspect I should go into more but I won’t because this is long enough already. Anyway. hates saltine crackers. technically has hundreds of children depending on what you count as children. they’re not biological children they’re…….ehhh that’s not worth getting into. sorta like the whole fish daughter thing but way more complicated. Has some weird biyearly peach scavenger hunt tradition??? learned to break the laws of physics and all he did was make a beach on the ceiling. is a pyromaniac and has set so much stuff on fire. Including himself but that was by accident. Has a complete monopoly on almost every business down to the smallest of industries like umbrellas. Has a band that makes…songs of debatable quality, on topics such as leprechauns. Somehow has never killed anyone. There are hundreds of thousands of people who want him dead. He likes banana bread and will break into your house to give you some.

As I’m typing this out it sounds like his entire purpose is to be random but I can assure you this all has explanations and he’s surprisingly rather normal. just wanted to clear that up back to what I was saying

He has a grudge against a family of woodpeckers (they wronged him). He has Many Mushroom Memorabilia. He has a bunch of pet mice, his favorite of which was tragically killed by some sicko working at a home improvement company. His dead mice are laid to rest in a mausoleum (GET IT???? MAUSOLEUM??? MAUS!??? GERMAN FOR MOUSE! ! ). he has a medical condition in which your brain physically operates too quickly which can lead to adverse side effects. the second the first snowflake falls he decorates for Christmas (including a living deer with LED lights tied around it). He’s friends with a little alien named Blarg. He has an abnormally low body temperature. He hates Mickey Mouse, and a moth named Michael moth (I think that’s its name?) because it eats his ties. Oh yeah he’s an ungulate, don’t remember why. Has pet llamas whose hair he uses to knit sweaters. Once got hit by a plane. Has had hundreds of thousands of strokes. Has fallen off a mountain (the incident was filmed and used in a commercial). Has the bizarre curse to constantly injure his heel. Once gave out baby pigs that he rescued from a slaughterhouse. Worked in the mines. O’chunks from super paper Mario crashed his wedding. He likes the letter M. He’s scared of snoopy. He’s allergic to turkey. Has little gopher versions of himself. Gets attacked by bugs often. Has high serotonin levels. Absolutely despise mystical creatures called Dinkies and would exterminate them all if it was allowed. I have no idea if he’s dead or not he just disappeared with only a cryptic email left in his wake. A skeleton once threw chemicals at him. Has a cat named shart. Can play guitar and piano. weird….cat….thing….I don’t even know man I can’t explain any of this in a way that makes sense. Maybe someday I will go into further detail but for now you just get an incomplete list of random things I remembered. he has a cohesive narrative I proooomise. if yall want a complete deep dive into him I will provide you with such, but unless there is demand I will spare you guys from having to deal with all of that stuff because it is A Lot.

anyway. face burning in embarrassment. here are my silly little guys thx for reading (coughs up blood)