#proposals in bl will never not make me cry

[pharawee]

"Stay together for a long time!"

—I SAW YOU IN MY DREAM: You & I in Our Dream (Special)

[bengiyo]

Our Skyy 2 x Bad Buddy X A Tale of Thousand Stars Ep 4 (Finale) Stray Thoughts

Yesterday, we transitioned into the A Tale of Thousand Stars portion of this crossover, and the mood shifted to match. There’s been a lot of consternation about the episode, and whether it represents a weak outing from Aof and friends. I have decided that it doesn’t matter for me, because it mostly worked for me. I understood the intention of having these characters get lost in the woods repeatedly no matter who they were with. I’ll have more to say this weekend, I’m sure.

Not these two coming for my man Phupha’s back during their roleplay!

I’m glad Pat and Pran got to have a cute montage before they left.

We will finally be free of the Our Skyy 2 theme.

I like that Pran made a friend out of Tian on this trip. Pran has so few friends, and I’m glad he was able to make one on his own.

Pat, please never stop terrorizing Phupha.

Unsurprised that Tian broke first on the apology, but glad to see Phupha getting flirty.

You just knew he was going to sign. I’m not even worried about the conditions. He wouldn’t be himself if he didn’t force you to meet him where he is.

I really hope tourists don’t tarnish this waterfall.

It’s not time for Only Friends yet, so we can’t have someone fondling tiddies yet on GMMTV. Mark, Neo, and Book, you are to be our champions.

Ah, Oishii tea is here. We can relax now.

Okay, I’m having fun with flirty Phupha.

We’re finally acknowledging the mosquito net as foreplay!

Finally, we the people have received what we needed. I wanted them to kiss so badly the first time they were here, and I’m finally sated.

Tian is wearing the Nong Nao sleeping mask! This is not a drill!

They did the Bad Buddy score scene. Few things make me happier than seeing older gays learn something from their juniors. Good for Phupha to get flirty in the morning.

I don’t think I mind Phupha surprising Tian in Bangkok, since it’s always seemed like a long drive. I get Phupha wanting that time to collect himself and put on his best face.

“People here let their cameras eat first.” I hate this description, but he’s correct.

GAYS IN A PHOTOBOOTH! I’m just going to pass out now.

Yes, Tian. Please upgrade this man’s fit.

Phupha is being so brave about how nervous he is about new clothes and their costs.

I’m so glad we’re getting to play dress up with Phupha like he’s a Ken.

Oh, I’m crying a little bit. Asking that Pat and Pran portray them feels like the exact restriction Phupha would apply. He would want their story told by people who know them and who they can trust a bit. I think Pran definitely gets Phupha.

Mix has such an incredible way to shift his face slightly and be suddenly so smitten.

Ink and Pa are at the play!!

This play was cute. I loved this.

Not the reversal on the finger suck into a genuinely decent kiss once again interrupted by Pa!!

White cameo!! I hope he continues to pop up in BL for the next 60 years.

Phupha and his surprises. I’m okay with it for today, but I hope his next step is being more forthright.

I love that Tian’s parents led the conversation for Phupha. He needed their approval, but respects them too much to ask for it.

His errand was a ring for a proposal. I forgive him for everything.

“We finally have a thousand stars now.” Okay, gonna lie down and cry. I don’t know what it was, but something old in me just snapped.

I really like Mix and Earth as a pair. They play their dynamic differently with each couple. Tian and Jim kiss differently than Wen and Jim.

Yes, give us the same unhinged outro that Pat and Pran gave us in episode 12.

Final Verdict: 10, Highly Recommended (Primarily for Gay Reasons). I understand a lot of the complicated feelings everyone has about Pat and Pran, but I personally loved all of this. I respect Aof telling something mildly dissatisfying with Pat and Pran, because that is honestly at the core of their dynamic. They are constantly subject to outside influences that make it difficult for them to be happy the way they want to be, and that is most evident in Pran. I really liked them crossing over to meet Tian and Phupha, because we got to see both couples really face who they are.

Part of the big difference here is that we are still seeing Pat and Pran in the middle of their story, and Pran especially still has things he needs to sort. With Tian and Phupha, we’re seeing them after their show ended. We’re seeing them face themselves with the help of the Chaos Gays that showed up on their doorstep. As a result, everyone got to see themselves differently, and we the audience got some of what we needed from both shows.

For me, I just love that both of these couples are “in repair” and are trying to be present for each other. Like Uncles Cheep and Dej said, once the infatuation fades, it’s about trust and commitment. I like that we walked away from this with me feeling like that’s the goal for both of them.

Shoutouts to @shortpplfedup @lurkingshan, @ginnymoonbeam, @waitmyturtles, and @wen-kexing-apologist for talking through episode 3 yesterday. 

[blakelysco-pilot]

23 for both of your pairings please!

Thank you for requesting this, sweet nonnie, and for being so patient while I got this done.

prompt from this list

18+ under the cut; minors DNI

Ev & Val

23. “Relax, I’ve got you.”

Breaths were harsh; deep inhales and sharp exhales, the nose of Just A Snappin fogged up as Val clung to Everett. Working her through her second, no, third orgasm of the night, he couldn’t help but admire the way she looked in the dim light, the moon giving just enough cover for him to see her, to appreciate her body laid out for him. His jacket was balled up under her head, her dark curls spilling over the green fabric as she gripped it with one hand, the other secured behind his neck. 

“I…Ev, I can’t…”

“Shh, you’re okay, I’m right here baby.”

He slowed his hips, his hands sliding up behind her back until he found enough leverage to pull her up, sitting her in his lap. Her arms wrapped around his neck tightly, her face buried in the crook of his shoulder. Her chest pressed against his he could feel her heart hammering against her ribs as she came down from her high. 

“Relax, I’ve got you.” He soothed. 

“Hmm, okay…” 

It took him a moment to realize she was crying, panic suddenly filling his chest at the thought of possibly hurting her.  Carefully, he tipped her face up from his shoulder, and his heart almost shattered at the sight of the tears pooling in the corners of her eyes, her red lips stretched into a smile. 

“Honey…”

“I don’t know why I’m crying,” A laugh punched from her chest, shaking her head vigorously. “It’s just, god, I’ve never felt like this before.”

“Neither have I…” He gently smoothed her hair back, hand cupping her jaw as he guided her mouth to his. “You’re it for me, Val.”

“Ev…”

“Want this with you forever, if you’ll have me.”

“Are you proposing?” She raised an eyebrow, fixing him with a look. 

“No, not yet. Just, giving you a heads up.” He grinned, shifting her in his lap, momentarily forgetting he was still buried inside of her. 

“Oh!” Her gasp filled the plane, and he grinned devilishly. 

“Think you can give me one more?”

“Oh baby, She kissed him deeply. “I can give you forever.”

Rosie & Jo

23. “Relax, I’ve got you.”

The room is suddenly entirely too warm, and he’s not sure when it started, but he can hear the pounding of his heart in his ears. Why is he so nervous? He served two tours, flew 52 missions, and made it out of Russia alive; this should not scare him and yet… Yet, it’s having Jo so close to where he’s dreamed of having her that’s causing his head to spin as if he had been drinking all night. Suddenly he was home and everything they had promised each other while he was gone was coming true. He had prepared for this in words, and in theory, for years it had been a romance between the pages. Now, the pages were gone. 

When they had gone out that night, they both knew where they had wanted the evening to go; now that he was down to his boxers, and she was standing in front of him in just her nightgown, the reality of it had him worrying. And he couldn’t figure out why. 

“Robbie?” Her voice sounded far away, but he knew she was close because he could feel her hands in his, her thumbs drawing gentle circles against his palms. 

“Hmm, I’m right here…”

“I know you’re here, honey, but you’re white as a sheet.”

“I am?”

“Yes, do you feel alright?”

“Yea, I feel alright, I promise.”

Her right hand slipped from his grasp and came up to cup his cheek, her thumb gently rubbing back and forth. Soothing him into a state of relaxation, and causing him to momentarily forget what had his head so foggy in the first place. He was responsible for making sure she enjoyed tonight, that she felt good, and most importantly that he didn’t hurt her. 

“Robbie, honey, are you sure you’re alright?”

“Yea, I just… no, I’m fine.”

“Come here,” gently, she tugged him to the bed, sitting down on the edge, she waited for hin to take a seat next to her. “Talk to me, what’s going on?”

“Aren’t you nervous?” He all but blurted out. 

“Of course I’m nervous!”

“Then how are you so calm?”

“Because I’m with you, and I trust you.”

“You trust me not to hurt you?”

“Robbie, I trust you with my life,” Jo smiled, giving his hand a gentle squeeze. “I know you would never intentionally hurt me. Is that what you’re worried about?”

“Yes…” He sighed. 

Nodding, Jo stood from the bed and moved to stand in front of him. Taking his hands in hers, she pulled him up to his feet before wrapping him in her arms and fitting her lips over his. Her fingers carded through his mused curls, the pomade all but gone, until she reached the nape of his neck. Softly, she pulled back, her forehead resting against his as she caught her breath, his chest rising and falling in time with hers. 

Jo let her lips trail softly from his lips, up and across his cheek, until she reached his ear. Nipping at his earlobe gently, with a soft tug to the pliant flesh, she chose her next words carefully. She hoped that she could convey the message to him, so that he knew that tonight they would take care of each other. 

“Relax,” she whispered. “I’ve got you and you’ve got me. We’ll figure this out together.”

“Together…” Rosie smiled. 

[phneltwrites]

fic writer meme

I was tagged by @ziusik <3

1. how many works do you have on ao3?

between my two pseuds, 132. I started posting end of 2018 and i orphaned 1 fic so that's everything

2. what's your total ao3 wordcount?

996,548 words

3. what fandoms do you write for?

Right now various Thai BL, mostly offgun, and I'm on the docket for a DCU fic for a pal who won me in a raffle

4. what are your top 5 fics by kudos?

the top 17 of my most kudosed are all MDZS wangxian, what a powerful fandom (then a witcher then a leverage)

Love Is More Than Telling Me You Want It - the omegaverse big gender feels one

Yeah I Know How You Like It - wwx gets telepathy and lwj is horny then touching about it. love every time i get a comment on this that's like this is a pwp why am i crying. hehe

your persuasions - lwj has a big dick and wwx is a san francisco based high tech software programmer. they fuck about it

the earthquake in the room - alternate universe Canada modern university fic. In which lwj does not make wwx toast

wild for your skin - canonverse pwp

from this i suppose that most people are pretty disappointed when i update and it isn't smut

5. do you respond to comments?

always! I feel like fandom is this thing we're making together and when people reach out to me I reach back and in that way we both add stitches to the tapestry that is the community

6. what is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

I think most of my fics have a hopeful ending. So it might be Verbs are a Tragedy the Captain Marvel Carol/Maria fic about Maria grieving. Or wait! maybe the Never Let Me Go fic because it ends right before you know that Chopper is about to get his heart broken. Or the John Wick fic about Helen cause you know she dies later and isn't able to keep her promise of helping John leave the business? Ok maybe I do have some angsty endings.

7. what's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

ha what is happy. Maybe the Leverage fic where Eliot has to pretend to be married to Hardison even though they are exes and that one ends with him proposing to Parker and Hardison and them being happy together

8. do you get hate on fics?

Rarely. Not usually hate at me but sometimes my fics make people pretty angry. I don't love it when people yell at the fic. the funniest though is getting an angry bookmark on a fic that i turned comments off of cause people were angry. like you do you in the bookmarks but lmao

9. do you write smut?

do i ever

10. do you write crossovers? what's the craziest one you have written?

I write fusions and crossovers! My wildest crossover is a 5x fic about Fezzik and Inigo from the princess bride meeting different other characters which actually might be the angstiest one now that I think about it because their last section is them going to the grey havens from lotr so they can sail into the west together. they also party with phryne fisher

11. have you ever had a fic stolen?

i think only onto wattpad

12. have you ever had a fic translated?

Yes, and it's so cool!

13. have you ever co-written a fic before?

Twice! One time on a leverage fic and it taught me how to use semi colons and also write introspection, a lesson i have forgotten and one time lesbian beach volleyball porn with a friend.

14. what's your all time favorite ship?

uhhhh oh no. they're all my favourites. of the ships i've written... no can't do it.

15. what is a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

I dream of finishing my pacific rim x avatar fusion with mdzs. the worldbuilding was so much fun.

Everything else I think I've comprehensively abandoned in drafts. rip carol and maria having fun in space, jon and tormund going to winterfell, and the shl ocean's 11 au oh shit also the fic where wwx was adopted into the nie sect and it changes very little in some ways. Otherwise I tend to finish things I'm kind of a robot

16. what are your writing strengths?

smut and extended metaphors

17. what are your writing weaknesses?

description, romance, tenses, character introspection. i also think my sentence level writing is not that strong

18. thoughts of writing dialogue in another language in fics?

do whatever you want forever

19. first fandom you wrote for?

leverage! my first fanfic is on ao3 for that show. though technically i did a creative writing exercise where nietzsche and the librarian from a Borges short story hooked up as a class assignment in university so idk i guess maybe literary rpf

20. favorite fic you have written?

uhhhhh. i genuinely don't know. they're all their own little thing. im more interested in hearing which of my fics are other people's faves

tagging @idrilka @defractum @daltoneering @giraffeter @ginnymoonbeam

[allthefujoshiunite]

Hello, I'm the one from twitter yesterday....Do you mind if I ask for BL manga/manhwa/manhua recs? I already seen the Bl recs you gave to anon some time ago, is it better to give my favorite BL manga like that? (Sorry if I get this wrong.... )

My favorite themes are : childhood friends to lovers, enemies/rivals to lovers, taking care of child/children, happy ending....

Sorry again if the themes are too much, if you want to pick either one, I'm really happy....

Welcome back! Actually, people being specific about what they're looking for (theme, platform, tropes, dynamics etc.) makes it easier for me to narrow titles down. I have my own favorites so obviously those are what comes to mind immediately, but when people come to me asking for something specific, I go back to digging old stuff back! Some series provide a good read, but not to a point where I remember them, let's say, 6 months down the road :,) It's also a by-product of reading a lot. N e gays, let's dive!

Enemies/rivals to lovers is a trope I love as well, and I actually have made a short list of titles I like with that trope. Putting that one here in case you have missed it.

Childhood friends is not a big favorite (if it's a childhood friends + a love triangle I avoid it like plague 😣) but there are series that I loved available on Futekiya:

Love and Howling (Masa Masaru) - This one also contains some supernatural elements, overall, it was an interesting read.

Perfect Propose (Tsurukame Mayo) - Has dubious consent BUT older bottoms are chef's kiss imo and it's sooo pretty. If you love domestic life, this will be up your alley.

I'll Make You Cry (Nozomu Hiiragi) - I'll never shut up about this one!!! Sooo cute and extremely funny! I personally love delinquents with an attitude 💞

Revival Blue (itz) - I have my own reasons for avoiding childhood friends that include a love triangle and this one avoids that route BUT the rivalry part still feels a bit forced and bland. Yet! This one has age gap and a bit of angst sprinkled with a happy ending, it was sooooo good!

Life in Our Hometown with Me and You (Isino Aya) - This one is as slice-of-life as it can get. Very chill and perfect for a comfort read.

Not from Futekiya but Living With Him by Miyata Toworu is another chill, very sweet childhood friends-to-forced-to-live-together-bc-of-their-mothers-to-lovers story! Just reread it today 💞

Also, here's a very interesting manhwa on Lezhin (free to read) called Count Tachibana. Love the historical aspect and love the expressive art style with bold colors more! (The list was getting long so I cut it short but if you need more childhood friends recs hit me up again ^^)

Now, BL with kids is less of a favorite. I don't avoid them completely, but don't go into them excitedly as well. Looking for Omegaverse titles would be more likely to find such titles. I'll list a couple that I found cute (despite the kids xD):

Our Dining Table (Mita Ori) - Another down-to-earth, cute and chill title. The kid in the story is actually the brother of one of the male leads (they have a big age gap) but the story is centered around their domestic life and food, super sweet.

Would You Like to be a Family? (Koyama) - I remember reading this on Futekiya, it was a single dad story I believe.

Sorry I don't have a lot of recs that have children in them, the one's I've read are titles that everyone know. For the rest, I tried to go for titles that I don't see circulate around as much, hope they'll be to your taste as well. See you around ~

[phil-lesterfan]

yaoi scholar….. pls i finished the untamed and word of honor what should my next drama be 👀 (happy endings only pls)

also i wanna know your fav bls. if you’ve the time!!

hallo! i didn't mean to let this sit for so long, but i've been using my phone more and don't like answering asks there. i don't actually know many cdramas, but i've got other dramas to rec, if that's alright!

(C/K/J)DRAMAS/LAKORNS:

sotus & sotus s (thai)*

history3: trapped (taiwanese)

seven days (japanese)*

manner of death (thai)*

restart after coming back home (japanese)*

together with me (thai)

long time no see (korean)

semantic error (korean)*

you can watch 2moons2 for the full story, but honestly, the original 2moons mingkit cut is everything to me (thai)*

*based off novel/manga/manhwa

20 of my fav bls under the cut :)

initially, i was going to call it my "top 10", but it's not my top ten, it's just favs that i really love or think you (sara) would also enjoy. so it's just 20 "random" favs. if you (general) want, i can upload the 200+ long list and even include "reviews" of my favourites, but i'll only do that upon request. also here's my blanket rec for mxtx's works. svsss is my fav. i'm very easy. thank you <3

20 OF MY FAV BLS:

sotus is very dear to my heart. i watched it right before i went to university, so it really set that mood for me lol it's not a perfect story, the audio is shit at some parts, and the acting was sometimes stiff, but when the show hit, my fucking god did it HIT. of course i roped all my friends into watching it. it was based on a novel, but the novel didn't particularly stand out to me (sorry). there's also a manga now (3 vols) but i'm just loyal to the show, y'know? it also has a sequel, and that one made one of my friend cry (i actually had to pause the show lol), but for me, the first season is what's rly stellar. (lakorn / rewatches: 4? 5? a lot?)

sasaki and miyano by syou harusono is such an easy read, with lovely art, cute characters, and the softest, sweetest romance. it makes me feel like i've been hit by a car, then the car backed up and drove over me again. sasaki is the light of my life (and also if i looked like him, i'd never shut up. and i project just a little bit too bc oh he just like me fr), and everyday i think about making him my pfp. i owe syou harusono my life. i want to say more about this bc it rly is my fav manga perhaps of all time but that also means i can't say more about it LOL (manga / rereads: 6)

the cat proposed (bakeneko katatte sourou) by hayane dento is quite possibly the best manga i've ever read. the writing is so beautiful, and it's a really relatable and inspiring story for me. plus it's got catboys. *motions to my dnp catboy pfp* but in all seriousness, it's a genuinely great story that squeezes my heart and leaves me in tears (manga / rereads: 5)

doukyuusei is a certified bl classic. i've not read the entire manga series, but i've got the anime film saved to my laptop. that was another thing i roped all my friends into watching, and yes, everyone was gagged (animanga / rewatches: 4?)

koimonogatari by tagura tohru is incomplete, and the "love" part isn't there yet, but my fucking god. i think i just picked it up for funsies at the bookstore, but man was i unprepared. it's not a fun read by any means, nor is it easy, it's actually pretty brutal, but it's a good story, so i felt i should include it. (it is one of my faves) (manga / rereads: none bc i will kill myself.)

summer of you (kimi wa natsu no naka) by furuya nagisa changed me. it was one of those manga that was in my to read list for a really long time, but i just never did it. when i finally did, i totally regret putting it off. i think i cried. it has a sequel (summer with you), and that was good too, but that first one just really got me (manga / rereads: 1)

fools by yeongha has an art style i will forever be jealous of. the original, that is. i'm sure the remastered version is great, and probably the one i should read, but i'm just way too attached to the original and the art is (in my opinion) way better. the story is fun and sweet, and i read it at another formative time in my life. *jazz hands* (manhwa / rereads: 3)

my darling signed in by dimang and new lung. if there's one thing about me, i'm gonna read a video game catfish story. this manhwa is so fucking ridiculous, but i love it. it actually gets pretty dark, which took me by surprise the first time i read it, but it's not between the main cp, if you're worried about that (manhwa / rereads: 3)

dasadanan by herb mandu also has just lovely art. i can just stare at it for ages bc i'm so obsessed. also there's side gl, and i love those two girls so damn much. the story is very easy to read, fluffy, and it's just good feelings all around. it also has some really silly extras. (manhwa / rereads: 4)

history3: trapped is so... it is also dear to me. the main couple is funny and cute; however, it's the side couple that really gets to me. they're so ridiculous and fun, and the actor for zhao zi is an acrobat? does acrobatic dance? i'm not sure exactly, but they wanted to showcase that so he'd just be doing some random gymnast shit for no reason and it's so funny. and jack was made in a lab for me, so. y'know. (drama / rewatches: 2, about to be 3)

glasses cloth and playlist by gwak jonpil was recommended to me by a friend i believe, and i'm so glad i read it. it's another easy read and also very ridiculous, but when i say something is "ridiculous", that's usually a huge compliment. i LOLed at, like, every other panel. the main cp is so damn ridiculous, and i adore them. (manhwa / rereads: 1)

starting with a lie by liang azha has the softest art i've ever seen. that manhua is like a warm hug, if a warm hug also had you gritting your teeth and clenching your fists because GODDAMN JUST GET TOGETHER FOR REAL ALREADY! i love it. oh, but i don't like qiu tian. sorry. (manhua / rereads: 2)

how to survive as a villain by yi yi yi yi is... look, i'm sure it has flaws, right? every story has flaws, but wherever they are, i did not see them. i mean, it's a little bit ridiculous at times, but again, "ridiculous", and the mc was transmigrated into a once-good now-trashy harem novel. and he's also smart but oblivious. bound to be a little bit silly. but also this novel ripped out my heart and stomped on it. and i thought it wouldn't happen with the manhua, but i cried then too. what the hell. i really enjoyed this story, and i think it's what got me into transmigration stories in general :P (danmei / rereads: 2)

a shoulder to cry on by dongmul. okay. OKAY. this is not a "happy" story to most. also the ending without the extras/epilogue is bittersweet to ambiguous. the issue here is that I LOVE ENDINGS LIKE THAT!!!!!!!!! this story is so damn good and i like the art a lot and god, some of the quotes? every time i reach certain scenes i have to pause and stare at the wall because no fucking way. it's just too good. i should go ahead and warn that the couple doesn't have the healthiest of dynamics and their relationship starts bc one of them lies and accuses the other of sexual harassment, so. i'm just letting you know now. but i let myself have toxic yaoi. as a treat. tbh to me it's not that bad, but i know everyone has different intensity levels, so. (manhwa / rereads: 3)

never understand by bbong is an... interesting read. arguably more toxic yaoi, and everyone at times can be kind of awful and annoying, but i think that's fun. sorry. i vividly remember reading this for the first time. for some reason. also, as with a good amount of manhwa that i read in my more formative years, i like this art style. (manhwa / rereads: 1)

semantic error by j soori and angy kim is a lot more graphic and hardcore (sex-wise) than the kdrama, which makes sense, but like... DAMN! my toxic trait is that every three panels i pause and go "hey does anyone else think these guys look like jaedo?" and the sniper that's supposed to shoot me any time i bring up rps lets me live because i'm objectively right. the characters are so damn infuriating, but i like watching car crashes, so it's alright. plus the art is good and, well, i never said i don't ship jaedo. *glass next to me explodes after a bullet cuts through it* whatever! (rereads: none bc it ended not that long ago. but i'll probably reread it soon)

no.6 by asano atsuko and here comes all the haters being like, "oh, that's not bl!" "that's more than bl!" "[some more dumb shit i don't care about]!" suck my pussy. i don't care. i loooove the novels and hope we get a printed official english translation. people are right to say the romance isn't the focus, but it's there, and honestly, i love plotty shit. i've heard it's supposed to be the "happy version" of banana fish or whatever the fuck, but damn if that's not a fucked up version of happy. i sobbed my fucking eyes out (novel & animanga / rereads: 2)

snow fairy by serizawa tomo. i'm not gonna lie, i don't remember this story, but on my big list it has a heart next to it, and i feel like i cried when i read it. i've said i've cried about like half of these, and i cry when i see something cute or when i think about my blorbo or when a song is pretty, so that means nothing. but this one really got to me! i think it was just a simple story with lovely art. it aches, maybe. actually, i've just found my initial review, which reads: "im so miserable....." (rereads: none, but i'd like to reread it asap)

bj alex by mingwa. insert loud and disappointed "ooh" from the crowd bc really, phil-lesterfan? i thought you were a scholar? with taste? LOOK. i know this is a basic manhwa, and i couldn't give a rat's ass about the side cp, but ahn jiwon somehow became pookie. it is agonising, though, 'cause like i said, i don't care about the side cp, but oh my fucking god, it feels like everyone else only cares about them. shoot me. also the side cp is into bdsm, but you can skip over their shit honestly. (rereads: 2)

aien catharsis by oshima kamome was another manga that'd been in my tbr list for ages. i really like how the story feels. aaaaand i just reread it and ah. i see why it affected me. (if you can guess what line stuck out to me, lmk, i'd love to hear it heh) it's historical fiction and has lovely art. tw for sexual assault, but it's not between the cp and it's also not shown. (manga / rereads: 2)

like i said, i have a lot more favs, so if anyone wants the full list, just ask. or if you don't want the full list, i can give rec lists for certain genres or just manga or just danmei, etc, etc. i know i'm in batman hell right now (ah. western yaoi....), but i've been fujoshing since i was like... ten. okay this is of course way longer than it should be. hope u enjoy if you read any of these ^_^ <3

[sapphireshorelines]

got into watching east asian dramas last year, watched total of 60 dramas (favs are ���️ marked, would recommend only the ones rated above 3/5)

2023 drama watchlist

K-drama

Goblin : 3.5/5

Tale of the nine tailed : 4/5

True beauty : 4.5/5

Touch your heart : 4/5

Strong Woman Do Bong Soon : 4.5/5 ⭐️

She Makes my heart flutter : 3/5 (GL)

A Business Proposal : 4/5

What's wrong with Secretary Kim? : 3.5/5

My liberation notes : 5/5 ⭐️

It's okay to not be okay : 5/5 ⭐️

Summer Strike : 5/5 ⭐️

Crash Course in Romance : 5/5 ⭐️

King the land : 4/5

Weightlifting Fairy : 4/5

Soundtrack #1 : 3.5/5

Twinkling watermelon : 5/5 ⭐️

Beloved Eun dong: 3/5

My Demon (ongoing)

Thai BL

Love in the air : 3/5

KinnPorche : 1.5/5

Cutie Pie : 3/5

My only 12% : 4.5/5

Secret crush on you : 1/5

Enchante : 3/5

Lovely Writer : 4/5

Bed friends : 3.5/5

Never let me go : 3.5/5

Be my favorite : 4/5

The Eclipse : 4.5/5

Moonlight Chicken : 5/5 ⭐️

Not Me : 4.5/5

Bad Buddy : 3/5

Only Friends : 4.5/5

I promised you the moon : 3/5

I told sunset about you : 4.5/5 ⭐️

Korean BL

Unintentional love story : 4/5

Semantic Error : 4.5/5

Our dating sim : 3/5

All the liquors : 3/5

A Shoulder to cry on : 3/5

Roommates of Poongduck 304 : 3/5

The Eighth Sense : 3.5/5

Love mate : 3/5

Star Struck : 3/5

Sing my crush : 3/5

J-Drama

Hold my hand at twilight : 4.5/5 ⭐️

My Beautiful Man : 3.5/5 (BL)

Mr Unlucky had no choice but to kiss : 2/5 (BL)

Jack o' frost : 4.5/5 (BL)

Eternal yesterday : 4.5/5 (BL) ⭐️

Old Fashion Cupcake : 4.5/5 (BL) ⭐️

Life love on the line : 4/5 (BL)

She loves to cook, and she loves to eat 4/5 (GL) ⭐️

My Personal Weatherman : 3/5 (BL)

I can't reach you : 3/5 (BL)

Minato Shouji Coin Laundry S2 : 2.5/5 (BL)

Only at 22:00 on Wednesday : 3/5

Taiwanese BL

Plus and minus : 3.5/5

About youth : 3/5

We best love 1&2 : 4/5

Kiseki - dear to me : 1.5/5

C-drama

Hidden Love : 5/5 ⭐️

The romance of tiger and rose : 3/5

[lord-explosion-baku]

Keep Away

Yandere!Bakugou x reader

It’s a special occasion, so Bakugou decides to wine and dine you. It’s too bad for him that you’re intent on ignoring him.

Warnings: yandere, dark themes, lime, forced orgasm, minor food kink, stockholm syndrome, spanking, light violence

A/N: I woke up at like three in the morning and decided to finish this. I saw a bad ending to a certain cyberpunk bl dating sim, and thought “would be kinda cool to be force fed cake,” but then it didn’t really turn into all that much cake feeding which is probably for the best. Who’s to say. It’s just kinda fun to say “it came to me during a cyberpunk bl dating sim bad end,” rather than, “it came to me in a dream.” Also, I’m so sorry if you read this and go “ew strawberry cake isn’t my jam. Belgium chocolate 5evah!!!!1!!” but if you do happen to like strawberry cake, I got you fam. 

“So you’re not talkin’ to me now, is that it?”

You keep your gaze low, careful not to even lock eyes with your captor—because no, you’re not talking to him, you’re not looking at him, you’re not even going to acknowledge his existence. It’s your verbal keep away. You’ve decided that it’s the worst possible punishment for Bakugou—ignoring him. You’ve tried just about everything: screaming at him, hitting him, crying to him, begging for your release, and it’s all given you nothing. You figure, why be anymore of a source for his entertainment?

“You should at least thank me for cookin’ you a proper meal.”

From across the candlelit table, Bakugou uncrosses his arms, glaring from the admittedly very well-made plate, to you. He clicks his tongue when you don’t respond, then moans around a mouthful of pad-see-ew, just like he knows you can’t stand.

“It’s so good, baby. Practically melts on my tongue…”

You resist the urge to roll your eyes at that. It would be different if it wasn’t his food he complimented, but that’s Bakugou for you. Insolent, prideful, and terrible.

Bakugou stabs his chopsticks into his plate. “You’re not wearing the dress I bought. Not good enough for you?”

You didn’t even try it on. You want to tell him, but that would only spur him on. Bakugou likes it when you challenge him. He always gets that stupid smirk on his face, that daring look in his eye—always like he’s ready to bend you over and fuck you into submission. More often than not, that’s what ends up happening.

“Your ass would look great in it,” he says before taking another mouthful. You can feel his crimson glower scorching your skin, but you won’t give him the satisfaction of a reaction. “You can wear whatever you want, though. I want your ass even in those sweats.”

You exhale and lean back back in your chair. He really has to be so vulgar, doesn’t he? Well, that’s not gonna make you crack.

“Yeah, I won’t force you in it. Not yet, at least.” Bakugou grins at the thought, chewing loudly. “I wouldn’t mind playing a little dress up with my doll.”

Your lip twitches, and you hope he doesn’t see. You have to squeeze your thighs together and ignore impending thoughts of Bakugou’s hands on you—first tearing your clothes off, then slowly, sensually zipping that tight, black dress up. You can’t keep from imagining his lips grazing your back, hands running through your hair, him pressing into your backside…

“Need some water, babe? You’re looking a little flushed.”

Your eyes snap to Bakugou’s and your cheeks warm even more when you realize he’s just caught you fantasizing. At least he doesn’t know what you were thinking about. Christ, you could only imagine the field day he’d have with you if he found out you ever thought about him like that.

After you’ve spent plenty of time hating yourself for having these thoughts, you’ve come to the conclusion that it has to be natural. In a psyche class you’ve taken, you learned a bit about Stockholm syndrome, and though you’re sure you’re definitely not falling in love with your captor, it’s perfectly fine that you occasionally think about him in the lusty kinda way. Admittedly, he’s earned it with the amount of orgasms he’s given you since you’ve been taken. But he hasn’t earned your love. Definitely not.

Bakugou stands, folding his napkin onto the table, and walks over to the ice chest he has on standby. He’s wearing his red dress shirt, paired with that white floral vest and nice slacks. You want to know what the occasion is for, but you won’t ask. You’re definitely underdressed, and a part of you wishes you had put on that dress he picked out for you.

You close your eyes and empty your mind of such stupid thoughts.

“How about some champagne?” Bakugou flips a knife out and cuts the cork off with a pop!, making you jump a little bit. He glides over to you, puts his hand on your shoulder, leans in, and fills the crystalline flute sitting on the table. He smells like spice and that natural burnt toffee aroma he has. It’s so nice that you can’t help but lean into him just a teeny bit. And he notices.

“You’re gonna eat somethin’ for me, yeah?” he whispers lowly into your hair before kissing your temple. You freeze while he moves down your neck, brushing a finger along the opposing side of your face, coaxing your head to turn. “Or are you not in the mood for Thai? We can always skip straight to dessert.”  

Bakugou dips down to kiss you, but you turn so he misses and kisses your ear. He growls out a sigh and you clench your hands into fists. You’re waiting for it—for him to lose his cool. You don’t know why he’s trying to act kindly to you, but that’s sure to end at any moment, and when it does, he’s going to feel guilty. You’re planning on exposing him as the monster you’re always accusing him of being.

“I’m serious, I made cake,” he says, a slight edge in his voice. He twirls a finger around a strand of your hair, tugging it so you face him. “Your favorite. Strawberry cream frosting, and it tastes fucking fantastic.”

Bakugou’s gaze drops down to your lips before finding your eyes. “I could feed it to you—have you lick that sweet cream right off the tips of my fingers.”

Your scowl tightens on him. He smirks.

“Your lips always look the prettiest when they’re wrapped around something. I’m startin’ to really like that idea.”

“Why?” you bite out, because you can’t take it anymore. You’re either going to die from curiosity or die from embarrassment when he inevitably undresses you and finds out just how much his teasing gets to you, and you won’t let him have that.

Even still, Bakugou looks as triumphant as ever because you gave him what he wants: your attention.

“Why what, huh?”

“Why the dress!” You bark, resolve out the damn window. “The meal, the champagne, the cake?! Why are you trying to be so nice to me all of a sudden?”

“I’m not trying to be nice. I am nice.” Bakugou rolls his eyes as if he’s explaining something simple to a child.

“No, you’re not!” You insist. “You’re...you’re…” Shock sets in and your shoulders grow rigid. He couldn’t possibly be...but if he is...he’d be absolutely daft to think you’ll say yes. “You’re not proposing to me, are you?”

“Hah?” Bakugou’s eyes widen. You definitely caught him off guard, and you could melt from the steaming blaze in your cheeks. “You want me to put a rock on those pretty fingers of yours? Make an honest man out of me?”

“No! No!” You exclaim on a head shake. “I just thought...with the whole atmosphere-“

“Princess,” he interrupts, taking your hand into his. He brings the back of your wrist to his lips, and for a moment, you think you could be right about him proposing after all. At least, until he speaks again. “We ain’t gonna get hitched ‘til you’re good and knocked up—at least four months in, too. That way, there won’t be a chance in hell you can skip out on me.”

There won’t be a chance in hell he will knock you up with your IUD in, so good luck to him on that endeavor. It’s not like he doesn’t know about it, either. There’s a reason why he’s never been hesitant to enter you unwrapped. Although, considering what he just said, you don’t believe he’d be any different if the circumstances were different.

Your lips curl into a snarl. “Then what’s going on?!”

“You seriously don’t know?” He scoffs, then leads your hand to your champagne flute. Once you take it, Bakugou tells you he’ll be right back, and you down the drink. You let the bubbles wash down your throat and quickly take a bite of noodles before he sees. You sigh. They really do melt on your tongue. Bastard.

Before you know it, the faint smell of burning wics envelope your space, and all the lights in the room besides the candles on the table dim. Then, there’s a cake placed in front of you—pink, with intricate, white designs lining its frosted edges. You count the candles and there are exactly the same amount of years you’ve been on this earth, plus one—no, not plus one.

You look up to Bakugou for an explanation. He’s simply grinning down at you, looking proud.

“Happy birthday, baby.” Bakugou kisses the top of your head. “Make a wish.”

Absently, you blow the candles out, but you don’t make a wish, because your brain is too busy doing mental math. On your last birthday, you’d gone on a date with Hitoshi Shinsou. He took you to a cute, little café, bought you a coffee and a tiny cake. He’d ended the night with one of the shyest, sweetest kisses you’ve ever received. Not even four days later, Bakugou took you. You never got to thank Shinsou for that perfect day.

The hair on the back of your neck rises with the sudden realization that you’ve been with Bakugou for nearly an entire year. That’s one year of your life ripped away from you. One year where you haven’t made any progress achieving your dreams. One year that you’ll never get back.

“What’d ya wish for?” Bakugou asks, but you hardly hear him due to the scathing fury that rings in your ears and burns your back. You’re unsure of what you should say or how you should react; you already pulled the silent treatment and you think you’re far too livid to go zipping your lips again.

There’s only one thing you can do: go absolutely batshit crazy.

“I hate you!”

With a quick shuffle, the cake is splattered on the table, your plate flies across the room, and chopsticks are in your hand, aiming for Bakugou’s eyes. It’s too bad for you that Bakugou either expects it, or his reflexes are just so good that he catches you by the wrist before you can stab him. You’re immediately twisted around, chest on the table, arm pinned to your back, and his erection pressing into your ass.

“Yeah? You hate me?” Bakugou’s voice is erratic, husky, dripping with lust. He climbs on top of you, grinds into your behind, and hisses, “wanna say that again?”

“Let me go, asshole!” You below and try to buck him off of you, which only encourages him to pull your arm tighter, forcing you into paralysis. You grit your teeth while tears sting your lower lashes. The only weapon you have is your voice, and that’s always proven ineffective against him in the past. Still, you can’t stop yourself from yelling. “It’s been a goddamn year! I’m sick of being your prisoner!”

“Is that right?” Bakugou shifts, and you hear the sounds of metal clanking. You know instantly that he’s taking off his belt. You writhe as much as you possibly can, fearing a lashing. He hasn’t ever really hit you before, and though getting him to the point had been your end goal, taking the belt is a whole other level of pain you’re not willing to endure.

“Katsuki,” you pant, desperate. “Please, no. Please don’t. It’s...it’s my birthday!”

“You think I don’t fucking know that?” Bakugou releases your wrist, and goes for your hair instead. He yanks you back so that his chest presses against your back. His lips are against the junction of your shoulder and neck as he growls, “after everything I’ve fuckin’ done for you? Ungrateful little slut.”

He pulls your sweats down, cupping your ass roughly with his large, calloused hands. They feel good—his rough touch against your soft cheeks—and despite feeling fearful for the state of your ass, you can feel yourself getting aroused. “I really gotta put you in your place today of all days?” He squeezes your ass tight and possessive, like he owns it, and in the moment, you can’t really say that he doesn’t.

“No,” you cry and god you’re pathetic. You had this entire plan set up and now it’s barreling out of your control. As his lips graze your shoulder, you let out a sigh and say, “the cake was really, really pretty, Katsuki. I’m sure I would’ve loved it. I’m sorry I did that. I just…”

“Just what?” He rasps against your neck before his hot tongue draws a long line across your skin, making you shiver in response.

“I was just...overwhelmed,” you admit. “Our anniversary-“ you choke out, the words sour on your tongue, but you manage to make it sound sweet-“is just around the corner. I wasn’t prepared...I don’t have a whole lot of resources to do something special for you…”

Katsuki Bakugou sure is a lot of things, but he’s not a moron. You’re positive he can read your facade like a book and he’s certainly not one to play along. .

“Oh yeah? You wanna do something for me?” He sucks in your earlobe between his teeth, nibbling playfully. You mewl as Bakugou reaches around your body, large fingers moving down the front of you and sliding down your pubic bone. He dips two fingers between your lips, swiping smugly at the traitorous puddling at your core. “Is this really what gets you off, sweetheart? Lying to me just so I get a little rough with you?”

“N-no.” You try to sound stern, sure of yourself, but Bakugou is light to the touch, fingers barely teasing your sensitivity. You catch yourself grinding into them, directly resulting in your ass moving against his erection. You can feel him pulse against you, and it only makes your pussy throb in direct result, which doesn’t go unnoticed.

“Just admit you want me,” he seethes, pressing more firmly against you while his middle finger teases your entrance. “You like me like this. You don’t want sweet—you want me to be a hard ass, don't you? Why else would you act like such a slutty little brat? Good girls don’t get wet after shit like this, baby. Good girls don’t like to be thrown around.”

“Katsuki,” you say on a sigh while bringing a hand to his arm, hoping to direct him to break through your surface.

“Put your hands on the table,” he growls.

“Please.” You ignore him, pulling his arm more insistently, needing him to deepen his touch.

“This is the last time I’m gonna ask you; put your hands on the table, or I won’t hesitate to use this belt against your bare fuckin’ ass. I’ll lick you so good, you’ll have bruises for months. You’ll need to sit on a fuckin’ ice pack the next time I’m courteous enough to have you dine with me at my table.”

Shuddering, you obey him, planting your palms against the flat of the table, away from the splattered cake. Bakugou lets out a contemptuous scoff, brings your wrists together, and easily wraps his belt around them, tight and with no leeway.

He then pushes your shirt up so that it’s around your wrist with the belt, and pulls your sweats down all the way off of your legs. You’re virtually naked in front of him, with the exception of your bra and panties, helpless to do anything about it. Just like he likes it. He always wants you to bite back until he gets you to submit. He was probably enjoying your little silent treatment show, too; it was just another kind of rebellion, another barbel that he’s fought and won.

A tingle runs down your spine as he traces it with calloused fingers. You feel your stomach tighten from anticipation when he reaches your tailbone and his touch leaves your body. You hear him chuckle as he pulls at a strap of your thong, snapping it back into place. “At least I know you like the panties I got you.”

Pain bursts on your right cheek as the sound of his sharp slap ricochets around the dining room. You have to bite your lip to keep from crying out—even still, you’re trembling when he rubs the sore spot.

“Awww,” he coos, snickering. “You gonna try and act tough?”

You exhale, trying and failing to keep a steady breath, but it’s all wrong and you’re already panting.

“Show me how much you hate me, baby, I wanna hear you sing it.”

The next lick comes without any precursor, no warning, no time for you to brace yourself, so when he slaps your ass, you can’t help but cry out—ecstatic or indignant—it’s not your place to decide.

“Katsuki!” You fall forward, forehead on the table, inches away from the ruined cake.

He chuckles at your position, petting the back of your hair. “If you want me to stop, you’re gonna have to lick it up, Princess.”

Your eyes narrow and you shoot a sideways glare back at him. “I’m not a dog.”

His lips tilt sideways, cocky and annoyingly hot, cheeks red, brow raised provocatively. “You sure look like a bitch to me.”

He spanks you a third and fourth time, and your mouth hangs open with unspoken yelps, a familiar, shameful feeling traveling down your stomach to your throbbing heat.

Taking a second, Bakugou dips his fingers into the pink frosted mess in front of your eyes, and brings it to your mouth. “Taste it for me. I worked hard to get the flavor right,” he commands, smearing the cream over your bottom lip. You’re helpless to oblige. Only, when you stick your tongue out, he pushes two fingers into your mouth.

“Bite me, and I’ll have you tied up for the entire night. I’ll make you scream until you’re on the edge of passing out, then I’ll fuck you awake. I’ll use you—fill every hole you’ve got ‘til you’re nothing but a leaky drainpipe full of my cum. Do I make myself clear?”

“Mhmm…” Not wanting to test to see if he was just making empty promises, because he never makes empty promises, you glide your tongue around his fingers, aiming to please. You let out a soft, appreciative hum when you taste the sweet, strawberry flavored frosting, and suck his fingers clean.

“Good girl,” he says, his fingers leaving your mouth, only to dip back into the cake. He brings them back to your lips and you take him in willingly. “Now, I don’t want to hear another word out of that pretty little mouth, until I tell you to speak. Understand?”

You look at him with affirmation. He spanks you again.

Your body jolts, spit and cream drooling out of your mouth as you moan, trying not to utter a comprehensive word. The vibrations from the impact sends waves of pleasure dancing across your clenching heat. He hasn’t even really touched your sex, and yet, you feel the coils of an approaching orgasm winding up in the pit of your stomach.

The sixth and seventh spank has tears falling down your cheeks. The heat is too much to bear and you can feel sweat sliding down your back. You want to warn him—to request that he takes a break, because the oncoming shame that’s making your toes tingle and your heart race might be a little more humiliating than having him torture you for the entire night. But you say nothing, your curiosity besting your dignity. The next spank does you in. Your body shakes as you wail, your coils breaking while you pool out, thighs sheened with your arousal. There’s absolutely no hiding yourself, and Bakugou is going to be all too smug about this. You simply cannot believe yourself.

“No way,” Bakugou husks, fingers leaving your mouth. You’re panting again when he brings his fingers to your fluttering pussy. He pushes them in and all you can offer is a sigh when he’s up to his digits in you.

“Aww...oh no.” You can’t tell if his concern is genuine or not, but it doesn’t matter to you. You’re ashamed, embarrassed, and defeated. He’s never going to let you live this down. You can already hear his future taunts buzzing around in your head. ‘You can’t pretend like you don’t like me when I’ve made you cum just by spanking your perfect little ass.’

God-fucking-damn it.

He has all the merit to tease you for it now, and you’re expecting him to—hell, you’re practically bracing yourself for it, but instead, he pulls his fingers back and pushes your bottom over, so you face him.

“Ah~Ow!” You wince when your butt hits the table.

“Ah. C’mere.”  He frowns and pulls you up by the belt at your wrist. You don’t stop yourself from falling into his embrace. He might be the source of all of your dread, but he’s also your only means of comfort. You let your tears roll onto his chest, muffling your sobs into his shirt. He hushes you, nails tickling your back as he kisses your hair. “S’okay, princess. You’re okay. I’m here.”

“I’m s-sorry,” you cry, and though your wrists are still bound, you manage to clutch onto his shirt. You pull him into you, shamelessly reveling in the familiarity of his scent.

“Hmm?” He lifts your chin, forcing you to meet his gaze. “What for?”

Your lips tremble and you shake your head, unable to voice exactly what you’re sorry for. Climaxing? Telling him that you hate him? Treating him so poorly when all he does is take care of you? You shake your head again when the actualization of your situation sets into the forefront of your mind. There’s practically a river of tears streaming down your face now and you wish for nothing more than to do disappear, because you’re a stupid girl, there’s cake in your hair, and Stockholm syndrome is bullshit!

“What is it?” He insists, he is tone low, caring.

Dumb. You’re so dumb. Your brain is screaming at you to not say anything, but your skin still buzzes from the thrill of your orgasm. Despite loathing yourself more than ever, you’re practically high, both from catharsis and euphoria.

“I don’t...hate you.” It’s small but it’s there—your voice. There’s a lot to decode from your confession, and by the way Bakugou’s eyes soften just the tiniest bit, you know that he knows what you will not say..

His thumb brushes across the corner of your mouth, wiping away at some residual frosting, then brings it up to where your lips part.

“I know,” he says as you take him in again, swirling your tongue around his thumb, now enjoying the taste of the cake. “Of course I know.”

Your heart swells when he doesn’t laugh at you. He doesn’t even look all that proud of himself. He simply gazes at you with adoration and amazement—and, of course, lust because you have your lips wrapped around something. Prick.  

“That was very hot, babe,” he says before kissing your forehead. “I really didn’t think that you could be so responsive to me.” He chuckles darkly, but it lacks his familiar malicious undertone. “Don’t really feel like I earned it, either.”

His thumb leaves your mouth, slides against your bottom lip, and is abruptly replaced with a kiss. Bakugou’s tongue teases your mouth open, then caresses yours with his. “Mmm,” he hums, the reverberations of his voice sending sensational buzzes down your neck. He nips at your bottom lip, then smirks against you. “Tastes good.”

He kisses you again, molding his lips perfectly to yours, and you feel his arousal poke at your bound hands. Not quite lucid enough to think it through, but feeling a bit mischievous yourself, you cup his girth through his trousers, rubbing his hard length up and down. You run your tongue against his, wanting to taste the power he has over you.

“You want me, baby?” Bakugou asks, pressing himself more firmly into your hands. “You wanna feel me slide inside that wet pussy of yours?”

Still not willing to give him a verbal confirmation, you squeeze his cock, legs wrapping around his torso to pull him closer to you. He growls when you have him grinding against your heat, a dark stain appearing on the prominent bulge he rubs against you. When he pulls away, you see that his pupils are blown, barely a sliver of his crimson iris to be seen. He looks moonstruck, predatory, and beautiful.

“Naughty girl,” he scolds, a tick in his jaw. He pushes you lightly, easing so that your back is on the table, your legs spread out for him. He groans when he runs a finger up your damp, clothed slit.

“I asked you a question,” he continues, playing with your core. He gets a dreamy look in his eye when he pulls your panties to the side, and feels exactly how wet you are for him. Then, he shoots a scathing glower your way. “Do. You. Want. Me. To. Fuck. You?”

“Yes,” you say with a nod. “I want you to fuck me, Katsuki.”

“That’s really too bad.” He snickers arrogantly and your heart falls into your stomach. Didn’t you just have a soft moment?! “Only good girls get fucked, pretty baby. You can’t confess your undying love for me and expect that gets you out of your punishment.”

“I did not!” You argue which earns you a dangerous look.

“You and I both know what the hell you meant,” he says with a threateningly sexy lilt. “You can’t take something like that back at the drop of a hat.”

”I think you’ve punished me enough already,” you bite out defensively, quick to change the subject, because you‘re bitterly aware that he’s right.

“And who are you to decide that?” He smirks, brushing a thumb across your pubic bone. “Thought you were my prisoner.”

“I didn’t mean that!”

“No?” Bakugou gets down to his knees, leveling his face with your center. “Actions speak louder than words, angelface.” He kisses your clit, making the same noise he does when he’s trying to bother you while eating, only when he does it on your cunt, all of your nerve endings catch flame and you’re spiraling back to needy senselessness. “Prove to me that you’ve earned my cock by riding my tongue.”

He’s nothing if not altruistic when he’s between your legs. He’s always been generous and dedicated to getting you off, but there’s something different about how he’s moving now. He uses the flat of his tongue and draws languid strokes up your entrance, taking his time while he swirls around your clit. He groans into you, and if the vibrations of his voice weren’t enough to finish you off then and there, his fingers sure as hell do it for you. He pushes them into you, reveling in the feel of your spongy walls hugging him tightly. He traces intricate patterns across your skin, mapping out the places that make you moan the loudest, just to be keen on teasing you for harrowing minutes. He’s going about this agonizing slow, but there’s something about him taking his time, rather than completely ravaging you to prove just how good he is at eating you out, that already has your walls clamping down around his fingers, your back arching, whimpers and pleas tumbling out of your mouth.

It hits you like a brisk wave crashing against the oceanic shoreline. First it was one liquescent sensation, then a pandemonium of your nerves roaring to life. Your thighs close against his head, locking him into place while your fingers twine with his hair. He moans into you, multiplying the excruciating thrill tenfold. You rock against his tongue, savoring this magnificently prolonged ecstatic escapade.

When your nerves cool down and you’re no longer twitching too much, Bakugou offers you a wry grin before licking his lips.

“Look at what a mess you’ve become,” he coos , kissing your shaking thighs, eyes locked on yours. “Was that all because of me, princess.”

“I...don’t think I’ve come so hard in my life.” You breathe, disoriented by the fact. “Oh my god.”

“That so?” He asks as his tongue travels up your thigh.

Bakugou fervently laps up your post-orgasmic juices all the way back up to your drenched cunt. He groans dramatically while his tongue dives back into you. You’re far too sensitive now, and he doesn’t stop—he likes having you squirm around, bucking your hips this was and that, all attempts at finding an escape for his erotic torture futile. Soon he has you spasming out of control for the third time this night, and he rides the waves of your grudging pleasure with delight.

“K-katsukiiii, pleeease!” You’re breathless, hot, and irrational. He has a large hand gripped tightly on your side while three fingers continue to curl inside of you. “I can’t t-take it anymore! It’s t-too much!”

“What? You don’t think you’ve got another one in you?” He keeps your eyes locked on his as his hands push your thighs farther apart, his tongue slowly gliding across your throbbing clit.

You shake your head, practically sputtering your pleas. “I will do whatever you want, so please-“

‘’S that right?” Bakugou grins up at you, smug and triumphant. He pushes you farther up on the table and climbs over you, one hand at the side of your head, holding him up—the other reaching out to grab a coin-sized piece of cake. He presses it against your mouth as he prompts you with an, “ahh.”

“Ah,” you mimic and he pushes the cake into your mouth. The moment you swallow is the moment his lips latch onto yours. You taste your headiness mixing in with the creamy texture of the cake and you can’t help but moan openly into his mouth.

Bakugou ends the kiss too soon, catching you out of breath and wanting more.

“You can be a good girl, can’t you?” His voice is raspy, thick with need, and you know he’s close to falling apart. You want him to. You need him to. He’s broken you, so it’s only just that he breaks sometimes too.

You nod, cautious to see what he’ll be doing next. He’s certainly not taking off his pants, which was the only thing he should be doing.

He moves your arms over his shoulders and leans down low, breath hot on your ear. “You’ll do anything for my cock?”

“Yes,” you sigh and wish more than anything for your hands to be free so tear his shirt off.

“Because you don’t hate me at all. In fact, you fuckin’ love me. You love everything I do to you, but you’re too stubborn to admit it. That right?”

You scowl ahead, teeth clenched. “Yes.”

He draws a line with his tongue against the most sensitive part of your neck, making you shudder, and asks, “yes, what, princess?”

You narrow your eyes. “Yes, I am stubborn.”

With a “teh!” Bakugou kisses your cheek and leads you up so that you’re sitting straight, and guides you both carefully off the table, sweeping you up to carry you so that you don’t step in any of the food you’ve tossed around. He cradles you in his arms, you half-naked, him fully dressed, and smiles sardonically.

“I’m not gonna make you say it, because it is your birthday, but I will have you know that your punishment is not over.”

“You’re kidding me!” You bark back, leaning away to look him in the eyes to see if he’s serious.

“Sorry, baby.” He laughs. “But I had a romantic evening planned out for the two of us and you just had to throw your little bratty tantrums.”

“What do I have to do—?”

“—to get me to fuck you?”

“Yes!”

“You’re going to take a shower, put on that fuckin’ dress, then we’re gonna do this whole dinner thing over again. If you can behave, then maybe—maybe you’ll get my cock. If not—well princess, history tends to repeat itself, but I was hoping we could act like a normal couple just for one night. Thought maybe you’d be into it too, but that’s not what you want at all, is it?”

“I...want to be a normal couple,” you say unenthusiastically. You’re not sure if you meant you wanted to be a normal couple with Bakugou or if you wanted to be free and normal with somebody else entirely.

Bakugou snickers, as if you said something childish. “No you don’t.”

“Because you think I don’t want to be with you.”

“Nah...I know you want to be with me. But you don’t want to be a normal couple. You want this, babe. You want what we have. You want the chaos. You revel in it.”

“Well, I—“ you begin, desperate to find an argument point that doesn’t make you sound dumb. Is he right? Do you enjoy this? Everyday is like a game with him, and it drives you up the fucking wall, but what would you be without it?

“I hope you can keep your self-control,” you retort flippantly, abandoning the argument. “Hope your dick didn’t burst your buttons, Katsuki.” Your gaze drops down to the tent in his pants, then snaps pointedly back at his face.

He’s absolutely unfazed. In fact, he’s more chipper than you’ve ever seen him—like he’s the cat who caught the mouse. “Just for that, I’m gonna join you in the shower. Keep my belt around those wrists and have you watch me wash myself—see all that you’re missing out on.”

You groan, head falling into his chest as he begins walking towards the stairs. “I really do fucking hate you.”

“Keep tellin’ yourself that, sweetheart,” he says back, a smile in his voice. “Just as long as you know that you’re not the only person here that knows how to play keep away.”

[icharchivist]

Only worse would be Belial's VA with Sandy's or Takahiro Sakurai (yes, he's only VA i remember by name and only one i can recognize after saying ONE FUCKING WORD, WHEN I DON'T FIND HIS VOICE ESPECIALLY NICE OR PLEASING FOR ME, FUCKING LUCIFER OBSESSION)

But on secong thought... Belial already has pretty graphic lines, i think...

Also... do you perhaps want to share name of this... anime? For... science, yeah... Hehe

Okay so i don't know how to start there but

-Belial's VA was part of a shounen with a gay romance subplot (No.6) which i watched recently and i'm still losing my mind over it (have him singing there)

-You think Sakurai and Suzuken is bad? let me tell you something. Back when i was 13, which was now exactly 13 years ago, a friend showed me a character death in a video game that destroyed my life. Downright changed the shape of my whole existance. I would rewatch the character death often, and would often cry about it. The character death is one from final fantasy 7 crisis core. Involving a character voiced by SuzuKen (Sandalphon's VA) dying in the arm of a character voiced by Sakurai, having him swear to keep living for him, that he will be his living legacy. This scene has haunted me for over a decade. Do you even realize what going into gbf did to my psyche. Do you. (Also SuzuKen and Sakurai also plays two of my favorite characters in dgm. Hell, my URL was made with the character voiced by SuzuKen in mind.)

Anyway i'm pretty sure they voiced rowdy things together at this point but at this point i'm just mad that they are making a duo especially to ruin my life.

I can recognize both at one word but except that it's bc of 10 years of intensely suffering because of them.

-Belial is already too graphic on his own we don't need a lot more

as for the "anime" i was mentioning i was. not really mentioning any anime so i don't know which of the two you mean but, the BL Eguchi was adverticising is here, if you want to hear more lewd EguTaku i'm redirecting you here (don't ask.), and the songs i was talking about is for a multimedia saga called Tsukipro, and though it has an anime i personally never watched it and only ever listened to the songs from his band, SolidS (which i got into because it was when i was obsessed with Saito Soma (CV Feather, yes Feather was one of the original reasons i played gbf))

which if i have to do recs about

this is the biting song Tight/Night. this is my litterally most listened song of all time I Am A Bartender. this is one of EguTaku solo that i really love Tide, and if i have to make more point about the horny may i propose EguTaku's duet with Hanae Natsuki (Geo CV) called Between the Sheets. And i stop here bc else i'll just share too much of their songs but yeah i have many thoughts there.

The more u know.

[sly-merlin]

KILLING ME -11 |N.Y

pairing : law student!reader + yuta

genre :    angst , mafia au/ arranged marriage au.

warnings of this chapter : cursing, explanatory mention of a pistol!

words :: ~5k

summary : “life’s never fair y/n. realise it as soon as you can . it is the only secret for living a regretless life.”                                  

or              

“  curiousity got the cat hitched”

taglist :: @kpop-choco​ @moon-yuta​ @kawaiiayasan​ @btm-taeyong​ @exfolitae​ @lanadreamie​ @cheersskznct​ @hyuckiesgf​ @theworld-accordingtocasey​  @yiyi4657​ @sorrywonwoo​ @sillywinnergladiator​ @suhweo @minejungwoo​ @leesalts​  @mal-nakamoto23​ @ro2424​ @itlittlefangirl​​ @nctzens-world​​ @bl--ankhaeji​​ @simplybree​​

 networks :: @kafenetwork​ @neowritingsnet​  @nct-writers​

K.M masterlist

K.M 10     next

a/n :: header was made with detailed instructions from lovely @cirrus-lily​ (thank you so much for your patience).

Previous night , taeyong’s office.

The thick, heavy unnatural silence was breached by the phone call. Taeil’s muffled words didn’t reach anyone’s ears but taeyong’s reaction was enough for an estimate!

“what did taeil say?”

Taeyong glanced at yuta’s hopeful yet helpless face. Taeil's order was far from what yuta's eyes sought. The past ten minutes were spent listening to the unsynchronized ticking of the clocks and some random whispering of the younger ones from the living room. And now, several pairs of eyes were asking for the answers.

“you will be stationed in nice, f-for two months.”

Yuta’s face hardened at his words. He gulped and opened his mouth to say something but stopped. The words stuck on his tongue would not be able to convey what he wanted to, he thought.

“with johnny?" Jaehyun uttered.

“no yuta is replacing him" taeyong mumbled, hiding his face in his hands.

Yuta snickered , “ as expected.” as much as he didnt want to sound bitter, his senses were not cooperating with him too much.

“this is not about you or johnny. It’s better if you both stay away fr-

“did taeil tell her the truth?” yuta coldly cut him off.

“i don't know about that!"

“then I'll have to do it myself." Yuta stood up, alerting everyone.

“do not stretch this yuta. This can end right here. Your absence woul-

“you got it wrong taeyong!” yuta cackled , “I'm dying to leave this place but don't you think she deserves to know that she's wrong here.”

“please yuta. For last time. trust taeil. this is the last thing I’m asking from you. You’d get the chance to explain. Ju-just not yet.” Yuta scowled at taeyong’s hollow pleading.

He inched forward slamming his palms on the table , “ since when did you start playing with wrong players taeyong? you are supposed to be the smarter one here. Who are you fooling here? you think I don’t know why she’s here or jaemin, jeno, jungwoo, chenle, jisung, mark, they don’t have a hint?” taeyong eyes danced around the room avoiding any contact as yuta continued, “Don't stretch this taeyong. this can end right here. without hurting another one and right before they can get attached. I hope when i come back , you would have sorted this mess out or you won’t have time to regret this time”

Scoffing at taeyong’s hunched figure, he smacked the table once before leaving the room.

Doyoung  followed soon , leaving Jaehyun and Taeyong alone.

Panic engulfed jaehyun’s entire being as he pondered over yuta’s words.

“he’s right. You saw her today. She’s getting worked up over a stupid misunderstanding and you saw the way taeil is acting! This was never the plan. She’s not timid. You cannot possibly make her agree to anything at all. Taeil would never let that happen. Heck! Yuta’s getting weirder these days. Let her go. We can wait unt-

“We. Can’t .wait. I know my limits, Jaehyun and two months are enough..” Taeyong whisper yelled “ I care about her more than you’d ever do so get the fuck out of here. You don't get to tell me what I should be doing.”

Jaehyun leered at the older man, muscles in his jaw twitching at his words  “you have lost it taeyong. if we fail this time, you’d be the one to blame.”

Perfectly ironed shirts were wrinkled as yuta threw them into the case. doyoung was ready to accompany but he refused all the assistance proposed to him. He left nothing. from t-shirts and pants to jumpers, he packed as if he was going for a one way trip to france.

He groaned , jumping on the suitcase, trying to bury the clothes deeper into the case so he could zip it. Once finished,he pushed the cases out of the room and into the hall. locking the door, his running and hurried eyes fell on the opposite room. It was bare of any presence. This was his first time peeking into your room. He was merely looking from afar but the very next second he found himself going through the album resting on the bed covers. a perfect normal photo album was calming enough to subside his inner turmoil.  

yuta scrunched his nose at the small girl who was either frowning or crying in most of the pictures. the family of three looked quite happy. But the girl didn't seem to resemble any of the adults. He almost let out a laugh at your wailing form in every other photo. Just looking at the pictures, anyone with two eyes could tell that you were a spoiled kid. No wonder you were full of attitude and ego, he thought.

closing it, he glanced at the room, simple and plain. Not that his own wasn’t but he couldn’t find anything that had prompted you to lock your door for the whole day. He left the room to lock his own but when he pocketed his keys, they met with something at the end of his pants pocket.

A grunt left his throat at the sight of the screws. He had placed them in his pocket to follow your fuming body, the reason of which he didn’t know back then. He was about to throw them on the bed when the album caught his eyes again. He cursed at himself for being so indecisive. Pacing back and forth , he noticed how composed he had suddenly become. He wasn’t feeling anger, just some traces of irritation for the whole drama that had unfolded.

Before he could convince himself otherwise, he took a paper from your desk, scribbled with a trembling hand and left it on the counter.

All while hoping taeil was actually being reasonable , just this once.

12:30 p.m

Looking through the power window, you stared at taeil’s arriving form, hands full with brown food bags. He hit the car door with his one knee prompting you to open the door from inside.

“when I say you are no better than others ,I really mean you are NO better than them!” taeil chortled as he shoved a bag into your lap.

“what did I do this time?” you rolled your eyes as you anticipated another moral lecture from him.

“nothing. you are making an old man to get food for you!”

“and I had suggested the said old man to enter the drive thru!”

“and drive thru is no fun, duh! The vintage the better!”

“just like someone I know! you exclaimed chewing the burger.

“very funny. You know highway stops are all about breathing in fresh air while stretching your arms, yawning so widely that you have to hide your face in your stretched arm to save yourself from the embarrassment. The first step out of the car after hours of driving feels like restoration of something that was denied to you for such a long time. and the second phase of happiness comes at the engine purring, the feeling is like no other, I’m telling you. but someone lost their chance to experience it .”

“you sound poetic taeil but you lack facts. The fresh air you just inhaled is what we consider a polluted one.I’ll prefer to sit inside and miss all that instead of going out and dying. So let go of the  fancy peace thoughts and develop your perceptions according to the changing world. The sound of this vintage engine is a source of headache and not happiness.Now lemme eat. IN PEACE”

“we’ll see whose perception changes” taeil mumbled munching on the fries.

You both ate in silence for 20 minutes. As the drive continued ,the stilled milieu took you back to the uncertainties you were trying so hard to suppress. When taeil had knocked at the door in the morning, which was beyond expectation at first, he gave you the liberty to question his actions but you had passed that opportunity, precisely to show that you weren’t that greedy. But you were! The endless queries were now making you anxious. Why did taeil come with you? what was the reason behind his pleasant behaviour, how could yuta agree to go like that? sure he liked your presence not more than you did but was he the kind to bow down so easily! Or was he designing something under the colour of acceptance. taken together ,you ended up being the ruthless one here. But the leading one was why did yesterday happen! Multiple stolen glances at Taeil were fairly noticeable; you were waiting for him to just start something. And he perhaps was waiting for you to initiate. Dilemma remained unsolved and you arrived in seoul just like you had left it, but visiting your parents had lessened the encumbrances weighing you down.

You were about to retreat after thanking him when he finally spoke up,

“b.n at 6! No exemption. And instead of racking your brain, just ask. it’s simpler than you make it to be y/n.”

Slamming the door shut , you dragged your feet for the apartment, shaking your head at the man.

Of course he knows everything! And maybe could ask him someday to get your own answers.

10 days later

The gun went off with a bang which if it hadn’t been for the ear protectors and the noiseless sheets, would have deafen your ears. Fingers pointed at the target, eyes coloured with impatience, jungwoo didn’t move. After he was done with his dramatic action, the glass shield slid and he entered inside.

“this is target A. this one is B” he asked for a confirmation with his wide eyes which you nodded at.

“right. so!” he walked circling the dry grass to stand between two targets, “so when I say hit at A, you should be firing at A, precisely aiming anywhere in this space.” he explained again, hand moving in front of the said space.

“I hit at the center jungwoo! The fucking center! For the first time in two weeks.”

“yes. You did hit the core but of the wrong target.”

“how does it matter? It's a perfect shoot”

Jungwoo blinked multiple times focusing on your puzzled face. He wasn’t sure if you were purposely trying to annoy him or you seriously lacked a few braincells to understand where you were wrong!

“at the wrong target.” he pressed.

“but I still hit-

“Ok. listen to me carefully now. Lets assume A is taeil hyung and B is a killer. If i shout to you that kill B and you mistakenly shoot A instead then you’d end up killing taeil hyung instead of the killer and then you’d be a killer yourself and even if the shot was perfect it was targeted wrongly thats why when i say hit A, hit A and when i say B, hit B. understood now?” dumbfounded, you stared at him bobbing your head a few times to indicate you understood. But you really hadn’t.

“You are not lying right?”

“Dont accuse me of lying!”

“Oh! So you still don-

“hey beautiful!”

Your heads jerked towards the owner of the voice who had just interrupted the bickering.

“johnny” you whispered.

“I meant jungwoo y/n.” jungwoo sticked his tongue out at you as he jumped forward to hug johnny.

“When did you come back?”

“just now. I flew directly to Japan from nice. didn’t he inform you all? And why is nobody at home?”

a small smile graced your face while jungwoo started explaining to him about some business event. You felt like jungwoo won’t shut up anytime soon so you turned around from the scene and made yourself busy with the magazine. As you were counting the rubber bullets to fill the magazine, a pair of arms touched your both shoulders.

“wh-

“how are you y/n.”

“you done talking to your prince.”

Jungwoo groaned approaching you with a stern look.

“you’ll have plenty of time to chatter. Focus on your job instead!”

“ugh. You are so annoying. I’m done for the day.” You announced handing the pistol to him.

“wait! what am I missing here.” Johnny's eyes shifted , not knowing what was going on in his absence.

“yuta hyu-

“I know all that. I’m asking about the bullets!”

“Taeil told me to learn some basics to defend myself and jungwoo is my assigned teacher who don’t seem to appreciate my skills at all”

“liar!” Jungwoo screeched and continued, “she’s poor at shooting, hits anywhere but the point I’m indicating at an-and she never listens to me.”

Snorting dramatically at the end, he glares at you. you welcomed his complaining speech with a toothy grin which seemed to annoy him more. One thing you had learnt in the past two weeks had been that jungwoo was frustrating when he was hungry and during the time he was supposed to teach you, no food was allowed in the basement, making him a hunger monster.. Johnny watched the exchange with an amused smile, just like you were doing a few minutes ago.

“alright. You both need to chill. Jungwoo, she's not a professional so go easy on her and you! you should listen to him. or if you want I can be your tutor instead!”

“don’t hijack here. she's my student and I was chosen because I am the softest and the sweeter one her-

“who is a second away from having a breakdown!”

“no go out. You are not invited anymore. nobody is allowed here from 6 to 7:30 .” Jungwoo announced as he started pushing Johnny out the door.

‘”yaa! Jungwoo. I’m go- don’t push me you rascal. I am going. Bye y/n. I’ll be waiting upstairs.” He shouted and waved in the air which you, for no reason, found yourself returning even if he wasn't going to see it.

As johnny was gone, jungwoo pressed the switch again to close the partition. Coming behind you, his arms embraced you and he placed the gun in your hand as he ducked himself to reach your height with another try to improve the hand-eye coordination. Occupied with each other, you both missed the pair of eyes watching you both  in a very unpleasant manner.  

“how’s your research going?” johnny asked with a mouthful of meatballs.

“it’s meh! The library is under construction so I can't properly look through books and besides minjun is too whiny to let me do anything. I can’t leave that kid alone so we're always hanging out after 1. I’ve some resources saved so I’m fine for now” you replied.

“seems like that minjun guy makes you very happy. Is he the one?” jaehyun took your attention as he pinched his neck. You narrowed your eyes at his unnecessary remark.

“my happy pill is not minjun but you jaehyun dear. I haven’t seen you in like 5 days i guess? So that eliminated all the reasons for my unhappiness. Your absence is my elixir jae. ” You grinned. Jaheyun pointed his chopstick at you but before he could utter anything, taeyong spoke up.

“woah. Don’t you two start now.” he cried.

“he’s the one that starts everything! I just continue his shit for it-

“well I won't initiate if its not for that stinky tongue o-

“Shut up before I lock both of you in a room.”

Hearing several snickers, it seemed like taeyong was the only one getting annoyed, everyone else seemed to be enjoying it.

Just when you were about to pour more juice, everything else finished and left the table. it seemed strange as how fast they were done with their dinner.

“how can you all eat so quickly?” doyoung seemed to be more perplexed as he asked taeyong.

“don’t you both know?” you settled your chopsticks on the plate as taeyong proceeded, “the last two to finish cleans the dishes.”

You instantly scanned the whole dining table and the instant regret of eating like a sloth washed over your face. There were only three left and next second there were only two. Jungwoo shot up from seat with his stuffed mouth, waved and left. Taeyong didn’t waste any time before he also scurried away.

“this was a conspiracy y/n.” doyoung murmured.

“I know right. they knew it. w-we have to wash for 14 people.”

“look at the brighter side, we don’t have to hurry now.”

You shrugged at his words, filling your glass with juice again.

“you should not be drinking juice at nighttime.” He lectured

“then why is it on the table?”

“aish! You are impossible.”

“so are you.”

You continued bickering with doyoung until both of you were finished. Like everyone else, you too had started to find joy while annoying doyoung. The responses from him were always a treat. He was also awfully similar to you. the nit-picking in almost everything, forever sceptical body language and lastly the  identical frown you both wore all the time. but you were not the one that detected the similarities, it was doyoung himself.

It was not just doyoung! With exception of jaehyun, it seemed like everyone was trying to make you a part of their daily lives. The day after the incident, you had hesitated to knock the door, scared of their reactions towards you but the dark cloud of worry had floated away with the warmest hug jungwoo had welcomed you with. You detected no rejection, no unpleasant remarks, instead you were strictly instructed to not to leave the premises without having dinner. And that one day became two and two a routine. You were confused as you were the reason someone dear to them was somewhere he wasn't meant to be at the moment and yet they treated you like you were their own! For first few days you were at edge, the affection not digestible. Feeding your suspicions , you tried to choke something out of mark who was also your designated driver but all he unveiled was his endless jokes and contagious giggles weaved with the various stories. Each day he recited a new one, sowing the seeds of intimacy with his family which, you couldn’t deny, were sprouting into something unprecedented. However vague it was, you liked it. You liked this unsought acceptance, being included like a family, taking you back in the time. But you never had the luxury of an easy life. Was this worth trusting? Were you ready to return their affection by placing them on the pedestal as same as jungkook and yugyeom. But this house wasn no more reeking of any resentment and you were more than fine with that for now.

"Stack the glasses, I'll pick up the plates"

"This is so tiring" you complained while scraping the sauce on the plates.

"You'll get used to it." Doyoung deadpanned.

"Tell me why i agreed to this!"

"You know the rules. And don’t you remember because of you, I washed for 20 people that day! You deserve the suffering woman!”

You chuckled at the memory. A few days ago, You, doyoung and hyuck were the last ones remaining.  And you had won the rock paper scissors. Though the last two were the supposed cleaners, hyuck had ditched the poor boy, leaving him with extra load.

"You carry some heavy dark clouds on your head man. I don't know how you manage to end up with dirty utensils!every fucking single time" Doyoung glared at your remark and you both continued washing and wiping the dishes side by side.

"Where are the spoons?"

"On the table. Wait , I'll be back in 2 minutes!"

Carrying the cutlery you made your way back to the kitchen but chanting of a familiar name froze you in your steps.

"He's acting like a child johnny! Had he called you after you left?" It was taeyong speaking in a hushed manner, but he was not doing a very good job in whispering.

"Nope. He just took names and contacts of all the whistleblowers and that's it. But i can’t understand the need for that taeyong! I had everything in control. What do you wanna achieve with your stupidity!”

"Jaemin, hyuck and jisung are in constant contact  with him but only to receive the codes he's sending. He's just unreachable and I'm not just talking about his cell network johnny. I'm losing him. He- taeil thought it’s for the best. They won’t see each others face for sometime an-

“And everything would be fine? Right? Sounds very legit. Goodluck with daydreaming princess.”

Hearing some shuffling, you trudged for the kitchen, not wanting them to be aware of your eavesdropping.

Stretching the hem of your knee length skirt with your hands, you kicked your feet in the air to get the non existing elasticity to work. chances were not less but anybody could see you so while cursing at chelin for the tight skirt you made your way inside the office. Your bag made contact with your right hip as you walked into the office corridors. You entered the security doors through the pass that was generated online for first day entry.You never wanted to enter this side of the famous company but with minimum options available you had no choice but to associate yourself with this branch, infamous for saving culprits of money laundering, false accusations and what not.

“ms. y/n?” a receptionist shifted your attention to her tall frame. You affirmed with a nod and she extended her hand asking for the documents.

“I’ll place your original documents in our custody room. No need to worry, this is a mere formality as we don’t make interns sign confidentiality papers. As you already know , you can end your internship with a three weeks prior notice and when we receive that application, your document would be handed back. And in case, you become an associate, and that would depend on your performance, you’ll get them at the promotion.”

You followed her steps as she stopped at a desk and gave you the papers back.

“change the folder to a chois file. And sign this receipt. I’ll give you a copy and don’t lose it if you want your degree back.” You blinked drinking each and every word she said. You again nodded like  a lost child and completed the formalities. After a few minutes you were shown to your small desk that was decorated with a pyramid of legal files.

“do I have to work on these” you voiced your fear. Even if it was a stipend based internship, nobody would take up that work load.

“oh no! actually I forgot that you were joining but I’ll get it cleaned in the evening so you can adjust for today right?” before you could respond the sound of her heels faded away in the distance.

“Welcome to the great chois y/n” you mumbled to yourself, picking up a random file to pass the time until further orders.

A week later

To keep your mind off the distasteful look painted all over mr. kwang’s face, you chose to look at his new assistant. The clicking or rather banging of the keys of the computer combined with the occasional scratch of her nails was highly uncomfortable but not more than the man sitting beside her. Your professor didn’t find it amusing that his favourite free fund student was asking for her permitted leave.

“how much have you progressed with the thesis?” he scoffed, respectfully dumping the application  on the table.

“I’ll be working half day. I’m not supposed to accompany them to the hearings so I’ll be back in the university in the late afternoon to research on that.”

He sighed, clearly not satisfied by the answer, “you want to skip lectures for an assistant job!”

“I would be promoted shortly so it’s acceptable sir.” A lie slipped out before you could stop yourself.

“what about getting distinction in thesis?”

“I’ll be surrounded with experts so it’s not a big deal sir.  I’m getting late. I’ll see you in Friday’s lecture.” In sync with his eyeballs, he rolled his chair to face the other way. Picking up the paper you bowed to his back and left the staffroom , a grin of content bedazzling your face.

"He did what?" Johnny tried hard to control his laughter but the scenario you were narrating was too humorous for him to keep his hands stable on the wheel.

"I'm not kidding John. Yugyeom seriously forgot kook  at Busan. But he did go back to get him though but I won't blame gyeom for this error!"

"Oh yeah! Just because jungkook slept in the gym doesn't justify his mistake girl. The driver should count the passengers before taking the wheel. Look at me, i never forget anyone no matter what!"

"Stop blowing your own trumpet. Don't forget you are driving a stolen car!"

Johnny rolled his eyes at the comment , "no, borrowed from mark so I can spend more time with you. stop lawyering and tell me what you did in the break. Apart from flirting with jungwoo of course."  

You shook your head at him as he repeated the same you-flirt-with-jungwoo mantra again but this time decided to follow the lead , "so what if we flirt! He's teaching me to save myself from predators , abductors and he’s very gentle with me. Have you seen his eyes! I want to drown myself in the depth of those brown sea-

"Oh my god I'm so sorry! I'm never mentioning that again but please stop. You are awful with words." His laughed again, you joining him soon. " Now seriously tell me how were your holidays"

"Umm nothing new except that everyone was on university funded trips leaving me with minjun , his camera and the plants. We explored botanies and flower shops an-

He had lied. You were not sounding awful but he just hated how quickly his heart beat at someone else's mention from your lips. He consumed each and every word like he could be tested on the said information later on. His eyes were glued to the road and his ears to your voice. He wanted nothing more than to be the only one you’d see. He wanted nothing more than to be subject of your talking but the voice in the back of his mind said fuck it johnny, you are already asking for too much. He hated how he lost control over his senses whenever you were near him but he was slowly getting used to the dilemma. But the trance he was trapped in quickly broke down when you mentioned something. Abruptly stopping the car by the trees, he faced you to confirm.

"You are doing what?"

"I'm interning. Don't look at me like I stole your candy John. I need money." You innocently replied not aware of the reason behind his sudden dumbfounded expression.

"Shouldn't you be focusing on masters!n yuta is supposed to pay for you so why do y-

" I can work for my money johnny." Frustration made its way to your face as you continued,"drop me home johnny!" You weren't sure whether it was for his mention or him questioning your ability to feed yourself but you were offended.

"Yeah I'm sorry. I won't mention that again" a hollow apology and the car sailed again.

Hiding himself in his car seat, Johnny's fingers hovered over various contacts. Taeyong, taeil, Yuta, jaehyun! He wasn't sure what he wanted to do or whose side he wanted to take. He just wanted to be with you and no one else! but he couldnt do that !

Kicking harshly at the brakes, he screamed. The voice reaching no one’s ears but his own.

Was he asking for too much?

i wanted to add more to this chapter but i dont find enough time to write due to some commitments! but i’ll update one more chapter before this beautiful year ends. and all the smut chapters would be uploaded again sans the adult stuff for the minor readers! and there are few more chapters left. masterlist says 12 chapters bcs i’m lazy（￣︶￣）↗　

HAPPY DECEMBER EVERYONE. HAPPY HANUKKAH AND MARRY CHRISTMAS. BE THE SANTA OF YOUR LIFE AND SPREAD HAPPINESS!!

[7nessasaryevils]

some actual content for once

@smasmashin tagged me cause she knows otherwise im being useless on this site so bless her

1. what fandoms have you written for (but do not currently)?

uhhh...regular tv shows? power rangers (i was 15 sue me) and anime and others

2. what fandoms are you currently writing for?

BTS and BL fandoms

3. how long have you been writing?

since like 2013?? but i took long ass break cause i was lazy and sisn't feel like contributing...SORRY

4. on which platforms do you post your stories?

AO3 and wattpad

5. what is your favourite genre to write?

slice of life and romance

6. are you a pantser or a planner?

a planner 90% of the time and then i start writing and the voices in my head change everything

7. one shot or multi-chapter?

both! i love long one shots but multi are fun

8. what is the perfect chapter length in your opinion?

none....because some of the most compelling fics i've read have been less than 500 words

9. what is your longest published story? is it complete?

a TharnType fic called Rang De with 11 chapters and 9 subsequent one shots- it is complete :D

10. which story did you enjoy working on the most?

my latest work- a mingkit au because it took me a year to write and jumped from being a train au to a painter au and i love it

11. favourite request you’ve written and why?

a reader asked me for back hugs in the tharntype series and it evolved into a whole proposal one...which was hella fun for me

12. are there reocurring themes in your stories?

angst and hurt/ comfort

13. current number of wips?

2 unpublished for BTS and ATOTS

14. three things you have noticed about your own writing?

i will try and find synonyms for everything

descriptive writing is my lover

dialogue is the mistress that spanks me and makes me take it

15. a quote you like from a published story.

there are so fucking many but here are two from recent fics

from @smasmashin House of Serpents “I’m just taking them out for some air,” Jimin says. “The field’s fair game, isn’t it?”

“Sure, and I’d hate to see you lose your life playing on the wrong part of it,” says Yoongi.

and from HyacinthsSoul (AO3) Ghosted The other Ming laughs and Kit immediately wishes he hadn’t. It’s an awful sound, mirthless and despairing as a cry. “You think I don’t know that? I wake up every fucking morning knowing it, you lucky son of a bitch. Knowing that my Kit is gone and I didn’t save him.”

16. a quote from an unpublished story.

Given that they’re going to a non-descript sort of neighborhood, Taehyung’s taken one of their less flashy company cars and as he follows Yoonsu’s directions, the ride is filled with small talk and Taehyung’s valiant effort to have Yoonsu treat him as more ‘hey hyung’ and less ‘oh great and wise Kim Taehyung part of world famous band Bangtan Soyeondan keeper of hearts and lover of Army’.

17. a space for you to say something to your readers.

umm thank you for reading my stuff and not considering it trash and i love you all for giving me a chance and please feel free to re-read my fics and tell me that you're doing so because that makes me cry and feel stupidly validated and if you guys want to be moots i will never say no to new friends and please don't stop reading my fics because i might cry....okay bye now

ummm who to tag....@mostmagicalunicorn and @bang-tan-bitches? if you wanna do this feel free!

[tobeornottotc]

So much to say about all Friday shows my brain shut down it’s weird how in a day all the shows that aired from we best love to TT finale made my day and made me happy I cried. We best love is a gem that has come and taken my heart it’s everything I love in BL, it’s like reading a novel and never wanting it to end, the pinining, longing and now the angst still upcoming. My love to all the characters? Everything about the acting, music, and writing. Taiwan came back and said you haven’t forgotten why you adorE BL right? Well here’s more reasons. I’ve missed Taiwan shows for so long I used to take the history series for granted despite my love for it and now look at me. We best love is just so great and cheesy and yet done so well I’ve not have any issues with it 😭 it’s not short, I like how angsty yet sweet it gets. Just everything

Then you have to my star. Is there any moment when Korea does something that does not make me shout from the rooftops another great one!! Like are we surprised at this point. Where your eyes linger still is my favourite Korean BL and although different I get the same vibes from to my star, there’s secret pining, confusing hidden hints to maybe more than just a very happy celebrity that is clingy and flirty. Seojun seems to know he likes boys from the start or is it just me. I won’t be surprised that the reason he’s hiding that video is because the reason there was a fight was because it’ll out his sexuality, either he had something with said guy he paid money to keep quiet about or said guy knows about his sexuality and threatened to blackmail him. But it’s the subtle hints that he may know about himself and his feelings like in episode 4 how many times he leaves clues and hints he likes Jiwoo but hides it behind this clingy want to be friends persona, I think when he was drunk he let out his true feelings he’s been hiding and he outed himself on purpose. I’m probably thinking too much but there’d be a lot at stake in my opinion if someone knew he likes guys it’d be a bigger scandal that’s probably why he acts like he doesn’t know when he’s flirting or hinting he likes someone. Just me? Jiwoo is also an interesting tsundere why does he have his walls so up, he clearly also has feelings but in the trailer he’s going to harshly break Seojun’s heart? Obviously I think it’s a lie it’s noble idiocy he realised it was the way to help him not get caught in another scandal. I really need to know more about his character. And the chef who knows more than he lets on who is he speaking to about Seojun does he know the other guy in the video? Does he know why Seojun is hiding the video he seems to have picked on the chemistry of Seojun and Jiwoo more proof that person was right? Let me know what your ideas are on this show. If this show is dealing with internalised homophobia and the scandal of the media invasion and celebrity lifestyle then man it’ll be fun to rewatch this time and time again. Kisses in Korean BL shows have become a staple for revealing a lot of secrets and pushing our couples to confront the truth about what they try to rationalise when it comes to their feelings. In where your eyes linger them entering a relationship was not good for them because it’d lead to separation and more. In Mr heart the kiss was revealed and forced our marathon runner to question his priorities and feelings. And in wish you the kiss happened when Sang yi could no longer run away from what he was feeling even if it meant they couldn’t be together because of same reasons as this show I’m guessing a scandal being caused because idols and celebs dating is a bit forbidden in kmusic and kdrama industry. Loses the fans. And attracts media attention. Let’s see what To my star reveals with this kiss now Seojun isn’t hiding what he feels anymore.

Then we have 1000 stars premiere and I cried at sheer greatness I’m a clown I came into it trying hard to keep my expectations at bay but my 30 minutes in I was bawling stunned and quiet. The directing is exquisite, in depth and littered with clues and hints to the themes of the show. The focus on the flashbacks of Tiens life coated in dark light and suffocating aura compared to the light and warm atmosphere of Torfuns narration whose life seemed hard but she found peace and joy just helping people and learning about the joy of finding value in every little things she had and saw. The peace that Tien couldn’t feel because he felt stifled and empty from his own choices when he thought his life span would be short. He didn’t know the value of money, life or little things. He wasted and gambled precious things to him, acted privelaged and lost hours in a sea of acohol, cigarettes and more. His lifestyle felt wrong after he realised he was given a second chance to find meaning. There’s an overall dark theme of corruption, greed and power that’s going to me an obstacle for the characters. Torfuns demise is clearly more than just an accident with the way people are trying to push her life to the side rapidly, hide details like even selling Tiens car which I have a feeling is what took her life (not him but he bet it in a race before he fainted) or clues that Phupha isn’t going to be done trying to figure out what happened to her it’s foreshadowing this isn’t over yet. We also have another villain who fled during the forest ranger fights at the beginning, he’s definitely coming back I wonder what these criminals want and how much danger Pha will have to deal with with this boss and his other hooligans. Why are they in the forest and what do the rangers have to protect? Lastly our couple met and you can’t tell me that Pha isn’t smitten he is struck with love at first sight immediately he meets Tien but he hides it through his stern cover and he finds it funny to bicker and tease him. He also thinks Tien is too delicate, rich and shallow to stay to help the kids, so he’ll struggle with liking Tiens determination and drive to feeling angry at how much value of life and money he takes for granted but it’s a learning arc something Tien will grow learning and transforming from. Their bickering is cute, both are intrigued by each other already Tien because Pha is connected to Torfun’s wishes and hopes, but also he saw him in the weird fantasy dream thing. He’s intrigued by his stern cover vs why people seem to think he’s sweet and kind. And he’s irked by the guy who keeps getting under his skin and calling him out. It’s going to be fun to see his own reactions and feelings develop slowly and his doubt that it’s his and it’s Torfun’s heart acting up. That conflict will be so interesting to explore and knowing Backaof we’ll get a deeper conversation about sexuality, spirituality and more. All his shows even his fantasies have these deep reflections and conversations about feelings and life of someone struggling with what their sexuality is to them. Even when fantasy he never fails to include those scenes. But also there’s always a massive plot twist hidden in the story that could tear our characters apart, and it’s connected to our girls demise 🥺 i have so much more to say about this show. But for now just know I’m obsessed in awe and excited for this journey. It’ll be emotional a roller coaster of emotions and lessons, but also a love story I can’t wait to see unfold

Lastly TT finale. It’s precious to say TharnType will always have a place in my heart, marked into it as my favourite couple. Their love is so incredible, everlasting and theirs, their journey to each other has never been easy and yet their love is constant, precious and real. They make me smile and want to cry because I still can’t process we’ve come to the end. Boy was it a good way to say goodbye. I will miss this show, the annoyances, problems and also the good moments. I will miss my LeoFiat dramatic souls, their angst and their own journey to each other. Glad to seeFiat finally got to define the relationship he’s been hoping and waiting for. And Leo finally got to show Fiat how much he’s cared. Question why didn’t I get a kiss scene from them? Forever staying petty about that. Champ and Khun did what they were meant to do, their own relationship was also adorable and I just wish it wasn’t only the last episode we had to deal with their confession and realisation that there’s been something here all along. Champs cute though his nativity and dumbness was real and pure but I like how he understood what he was feeling and why he wanted Khun by his side and more. So well done to them getting together. We had Tharn finally Wade his way into Type’s fathers acceptance I wish he wasn’t just a comedic role but we had more conversations serious ones about him learning to accept Tharn still it was wholesome he grew to finally let them be together he understood Type was never going to leave Tharn and was at his best with him. Love the Kirigun family and how much they push Tharn to be his best. Their support was earnest and I loved we saw Thorn get married like a full circle after he proposed and found his own love story. We Stan a very protective supportive older brother who has always been a source of help during TT relationship. Techno irked me in this series and he became one of my least fave characters his snooping whilst cute just didn’t mesh well with me and I kept wondering where his man was because he acted like someone who wasn’t satisfied in the relationship he was in. Just an annoying presence overall. Sorry not sorry. That being said I didn’t hate this sequel and I know rewatching it as second part to TT journey watching 24 episodes of TT back to back will be an emotional experience and will show you all the clues, meta, subtext and overall plot of these two in a better light. Overall TT is always going to be a fave show of mine, and the sequel whilst not fulfilling all my expectations it made me still feel like it was worth my attention and care. Thank you to the cast, crew and production for this. My Fridays will never be the same we’re really now in 2021 with these new shows 😭 just manner of d@earth to go. 😭

Friday shows bringing me joy, excitement and most of all new lessons and new ideas. I’m so excited and I loved that these are the shows we have in January. Let’s hope they keep being great and our Fridays stay exciting and warm 👌

[redxblueihateloveyou]

This is a personal opinion but from where I see it the Given movie and the anime itself definitely was... something that I would question because somethings just.. didn't make sense to me. The development of the Characters were either super fast or super slow and it made the pacing really really weird for me idk. But I do think that a huge reason so many people love the Given movie is because of the fact that when you compare Given to OTHER JP BL animes, there's very very slight improvement in terms of the story itself of Given. Is the story poorly executed? Fucking hell, who the hell is going to say no here. But is it better then some of the JP BLs out there? That's depended on how you view BL to be. For a lot of people things like Super Lovers or Hitorijime My Hero are super unbearable to watch because it's "problematic" (which honestly okay, you do you BB) which then leads them to look for BL animes that DON'T have such "themes." Leading them to actually liking things poorly executed but just "not problematic", Given for example.

Given is “not problematic”? Debatable.

Their first kiss was right after Mafuyu finally had a courage to sing a song about his ex who commited a suicide. ???

Problematic doesn’t only mean stuff like “he’s underage”. What about using someone to get over your grief or getting into a relationship with someone who is still not over his ex death and is vulnerable at the moment? Is this suddenly “not problematic” bc they’re same age and he haven’t pushed him into a wall in throws of passion?

To me it’s not even about the fact if it’s problematic or not (it’s rarely not tho, no matter what ppl think), it’s about whether its believable and feels genuine or not. It depends on many factors: situation, characters past, traumas, etc, etc. It depends on the story and how you write it.

Change some stuff and it’s gonna be a completely different thing. Make it like Uenoyama only hugged Mafuyu after the song, even tho he wanted to kiss him, but knows that it’s not the right moment. Make Mafuyu heal first, make Uenoyama be in his own angst that he loves Mafuyu so much for example, but cares about him recover more, so he doesn’t expect for it to go somewhere, then he tries to date someone and Mafuyu first starts getting out there, when he feels like he can start trying again. Someday he gets sick and Uenoyama cancels his date to take care of him even tho it’s nothing serious and then the realization comes. Make Mafuyu kiss him first and take the first step. This would’ve changed everything so much. He should’ve made the first step when he was ready, this would’ve felt so right. Uenoyama kissing him after that song is just.. it feels, I was like ehhhmmm.. weird?

Seeing someone saying that Given is a masterpiece is hilarious to me. The fact that it includes heavy themes like suicide, doesn’t make it a masterpiece, esp when it’s handled this badly. Once again, if you pick such thing as a base for a love story, do it right then, not in a “bibbidi bobbidi boo” kind of thing. 

BL or not BL, any relationships, it depends on whether you watch it and it feels plausable or not. 

For example, if Yuu says that he can’t live with Mika, my tongue won’t even twist to call it “unhealthy” or be like “dude why”. But if some high schooler in slice of life anime who has a caring family tried to end himself bc his two weeks friend left him, I would’ve yelled “bitch go see a doctor”. 

Depending on the story you can sell some feelings or not.

Nezumi and Shion are also problematic according to ppl’s logic these days. But I 100% believe they’re each other’s true loves. Only 11 episodes and it’s sold.

In Given I didn’t believe it. Bc it’s ridiculous, ok? It wasn’t the right place or time to start this relationship. It is not a new love story, it’s just a sad story. 

Given movie is slightly better compared to other japanese BL? Why would you offend Sekaiichi Hatsukoi, Uragiri wa boku no namae, No.6 and many others?

Also better where? They kept the same old “’stop, i don’t want to’, but he did it anyway” stuff AND on top of that the story sucks.

The way he used him knowing very well that he was unrequitedly in love with him for so long is so disgusting that it leaves a much grosser feeling than many yaois combined. You’re saying “it’s slightly better” bc they’re of age or don’t have an age difference? I don’t get it. It somehow makes everything better?

No, thanks. I’d rather watch Onodera sleep with Takano in high school with them being genuinely into each other and it going great than whatever happened in the Given movie. I don’t care if they’re both 18 there, it made me feel bad.

I didn’t feel bad, when Wei Wuxian thought “why the fuck didn't I have sex with Lan Zhan back when I was 15? I've really pissed away all my days, haven't I?”. I wonder why is that.

Like what you’re saying here is that their opinion on BL is so low that they automatically would give it 10 out of 10 bc it’s slightly better than smth that they find “unbearable” to watch? What kind of evaluation is that exactly? Maybe also let’s compare each anime to “boku no pico”, then everything will look like a masterpiece.

Like excuse me for the fact that when I watch some shonen-ai and yaoi, I judge it the same way I judge any other genre and any other relationships (hetero or gay) in animes. On a scale whether I care or don’t care, whether I believe that they love each other or don’t, whether it’s a good story or not. I don’t get what it means “it’s good for yaoi”. It’s just not good. This movie is trash, I mean, the relationship in it is trash. Who the fuck cares gay or not gay. Trash relationships are trash. Bad story is a bad story. Whether it’s a bad gay story or a bad hetero story, I don’t give a shit.

The reason I’m more into boy on boy ships is because I love the relationships there more than relationships in most heterosexual couples. My fav hetero ships are either “from hate/attraction to love” stories like “gone with the wind”, “anastasia” or “pride and prejudice” or stuff like “equals without pink goo, who only see each other and don’t need no one else and would die for each other, epic soulmates” like Richard and Kahlan. In anime 99% of those fit bromances, not romances. Like I don’t find Midoriya/Uraraka appealing at all for a reason that “she said ‘hi’, he blushed as a tomato, now they’re supposed to be each other’s romantic interests” is not what I find romantic. I find romantic the fact that Todoroki is forever devoted to Midoriya bc he knows he’s amazing and is not afraid to say it; and he’ll always be there for him when he needs him, no matter what it is, him just sitting there crying, some villain trying to kill him or if he’s too late out ther grossery shopping. Uraraka most of the times doesn’t even care where he is.

Most hetero romantic animes, I just find ridiculous, too cheesy and unrealistic and I’m not ready to watch 50 episodes for them to hold hands. I’m not in that age and I also never found things like this romantic before either. Stuff like Kisa/Yukine, when you meet someone, find him attractive, wanna fuck him, then fall in love accidentally.. yeah, that’s understandable to me. Stuff like Takano/Onodera “I was an naive idiot in high school, but now life made me a sassy bitch and I can’t open up to people as easily” also yes, relatable. 

When you’re turning into a tomato bc someone said “penis” and think holding hands will take your virginity or smth, that’s not my thing.

So when I watch BL, I expect more, not less. So if it’s bad, I just say it’s bad, I’m not gonna be like “hmm... unproblematic... then 10/10″ like what? 

1stly, even “little mermaid” and “cinderella” are problematic. 

2ndly everyone is so focused on purity these days, like storyline don’t matter at all. It’s like any great love story is automatically trash if they have age difference. Any trash love story is great, if they don’t?

Let’s then also rate “Dororo” as 1, bc it’s like 24 episodes of them falling for each other while she’s 11 and he’s 16. Wow, such gross relationships they have during the whole story. Doesn’t matter that she grew up at the end of the last episode, the whole anime she’s a child. And let’s rate Noragami 0, bc 2000 years old perverted Yato is into 15 year olds.

No one has to fuck asap (heck even in the same hella problematic “Super Lovers” you talk about, Haru refused to fuck Ren even tho he was 17 in s2 and wanted to fuck another guy) and the rule “you can only fall in love after 18″ doesn’t exist. Also underage is not BL thing, it’s all anime thing. It’s time to shut it already. There are zillions of age gap couples out there who are great. Hyakkimaru waited for Dororo to grow up, it’s fine, seriously, they love each other in the right way, he didn’t want to fuck her when she was 11, okay? They did love each other tho already then. Pls excuse them for that.

3rdly, some relationship that ppl here call unproblematic are 20 times more problematic, than what they call problematic.

4tly, why the heck it’s like couples who have an amazing character and relationship progression, who love each other to death and will do anything for each other, ppl go: “wow, at the very beginning, he grabbed his wrist, he needs to go to jail”. Meanwhile a relationship who has no base, no story, no logical progression, no anything are “yes, best love story in the world”. Yeah... who cares if it feels like it’s all been pulled out of an ass and doesn’t make sense, very healthy tho.

It sounds lately like if most ppl here had two stories in front of them and one would be about two men who just met and the next day one proposed and they lived happily ever after and 2nd would be some complicated incredible story with a natural progression of the relationship, but they yelled at each other once, they’d be like “1st is better”. Well, not to me, no.

[tsrookie]

Thoughts and expectations for OH3 when it comes to Ethan and MC? Do you think they'll be a time skip at the start and PB would skip the whole 'relationship' talk and they just be together bc PB is lazy? lol. What do you feel will happen with the whole Bloom Edenbrook? Do you think Ethan will be a lot more open at work with MC? I'm curious to hear ALL your theories! (srsly tell me all of them! haha) 😂💗

*cracks knuckles* Oookay, so I’ve got a lot to say.

I don’t have any hopes for an official relationship talk. PB has given the option to choose our Ll and change little bits of the story according to it (like in Chapter 18), and they’ve started changing the dialogue for all the Lls, not just Ethan, based on those choices. I think that shows that we’ve locked in our Ll (and even if that’s not how the game views it, we certainly have).

As for an ILY, I think it’ll be like the one in Bloodbound. Something goes wrong (and that’s pretty easy for Edenbrook), and we get a ‘calm before the storm’ kind of moment with our Ll. I don’t know whether it’ll be paywalled (I hope it’s not), but if it is, that scene might have the first ILY, and the following Ll scenes will have it by default.

I’m sorry, but I can never say ‘Bl**m Edenbrook’🤢 It’s ‘Edenbrook’ forever. I think Leland would want the diagnostics team to focus solely on research, which would lead to them seeing fewer patients. That’s gonna piss Ethan and MC off, and they’ll definitely have issues with Leland. I don’t have any ideas about Dr. Mendoza. Sure, he could be an asshole who creates problems for Ethan and MC, but that wouldn’t be fair to the other stans, so I don’t think they’d go down that road (wouldn’t mind some jealous Ethan content though😔).

Ethan would definitely be a lot more open with MC. I mean, the man has kissed them openly twice for crying out loud! I hope his personality won’t do a complete 180 degree turn, though. I still want the professional Dr. Ramsey at work, with maybe a little bit of flirting here and there, lunch dates and supply closet makeout sessions. But I want them to stay the same while they’re discussing a patient. Changing that wouldn’t be right, especially since that was one of Ethan’s main fears for dating MC. He worried that he wouldn’t be able to be the mentor they needed if they were in a relationship.

My main theory regarding the whole book is that it’ll mainly be about making Leland take a step back, or overthrowing him completely. He could have a realisation that he truly isn’t fit to run a hospital, and hand things over to the board. Or he could very well continue changing the very mission and heart of Edenbrook, so the gang pull a GA, and quit.

But if Leland chooses to leave, then I think the second half of the book could be about MC’s plans after their residency finishes. I’m hoping for some quality angst with Ethan about MC getting an offer that requires them to move away from Boston. Some mentor vs boyfriend mental agony in Ethan’s head would be much appreciated😌 And regardless of MC’s decision, I would love it if Ethan gets down on one knee and proposes🥺 (I have another ask about the whole marriage thing. I’ll explain in detail there)

So yeah, that’s what’s in my head for book 3. Pretty sure PB isn’t gonna give me even 40% of the stuff here😅 Thanks for the ask, anon!💙

[crysta-cub]

Can I get #104 from list 2: “I’ve never felt stronger than when you’re with me.” with alphyne please? -Mystery

Took me a hot second to figure out how I wanted to do this one. 

(another one for the great @mystery-fic-anon)

The convention center was abuzz with activity as attendees wandered from booth to booth, squealing with glee as they interacted with creators, actors and fan artists of their favorite fandoms.  

Monsters and Humans alike are dressed as various characters, being animated as they meet and greet with fellow fans and invading rooms for the various panels and activities happening all weekend long.

Earlier Papyrus won 3rd place for his homemade Vash the Stampede costume that Sans helped him create over the past few months. Alphys, dressed as a Cubone (With Papyrus��� help), and Sans, donning a simple Totoro kigurumi, manage to dominate at a Studio Ghibli Trivia Challenge while the rest of their crew cheered them on from the crowd. 

Undyne is stopped every few feet for photo opts with her as Wonder Woman, lifting most fans up over her shoulders, showcasing her strength and giving them the best epic shots they could ever dream of. Her gleeful laugh could be heard clear across the building.

Alphys watches Undyne and Papyrus interact with a small group of Hetalia Cosplayers while her and Sans enjoy some fries at the food court, her bony ‘helm’ placed on the table. Alphys sighs as she watches her wonderful girlfriend impress the masses. 

“hehehe, want some fry with your ketchup?”

Alphys jumps at Sans comment, looking down at the fry in her fingers, coated completely in the red condiment.  

Wiping off the excess ketchup, Alphys huffs at Sans before eating the fry. Sans shrugs and grabs his own. “can’t say I didn’t fry to help you.”

“Oh Sans.” Alphys shakes her head before looking over to where she last saw Undyne and Papyrus, only to find them gone. “Oh, wh-where did th-they go?”

“HEY NERDS!” the answer came from behind and suddenly long blue arms wrap themselves around her in a tight squeeze. Alphys squeaks in surprise before leaning into the hug. “You Guys Having Fun Or What?

“Ohhh, I’m ha-having a Bl-blast. This has been the b-best day.” Alphys squeaked at the cute squeeze Undyne gave her, while Sans only offered a simple thumbs up. 

“Everyone is en-enjoying how strong you are Dyne. You’re so l-lucky to be so-so talented.” Alphys rubbed her hands together, blushing as she laid out the complement. 

“AL!” 

Suddenly she was spun around to face Undyne, squeaking in surprise. Alphys caught Undyne giving both skeleton brothers a significant look, causing both of them to gather behind her with their hands behind their backs.

“I’ve Never Felt Stronger Than When You’re With Me.” Undyne looked sternly in her eyes. She was kneeling in front of Alphys, making her eye level with the scientist. Alphys could feel her soul begin to race. 

“Al, You Are So Smart, And Creative. You Have That Cute Stutter And You’re The Best. Not To Mention That Thing You Do With Your Tongue.” Undyne blurted out, a crowd beginning to form around them. 

Alphys was beet red. “Undyne, don’t say that.” She barely caught both brothers chuckles as they raised their hands, glowing blue, raising parchment high above the crowd’s heads. 

“Fuhuhuhu, Al, I Want To Spend The Rest Of Our Lives Together, Officially!” Undyne begins looking for a back pocket, realizing that the outfit had none. Papyrus steps forward and hands a small box to her with an “Audible Wink.”

Alphys had her small claws up to her face, tears welling up in her eyes. ‘This can’t be happening. It’s just like the ‘Conventional Proposal’ fanfiction I wrote a year ago, except there’s no Mew Mew Kissy Cutie Cos.... Oh wait there’s one’ Her mind buzzed a mile a minute, halting at the large grin on her girlfriends face.

“Alphys, Would You Do Me The Honor...” The parchment unfurled revealing the words as Undyne spoke them, loud and clear for all to hear. “WILL YOU MARRY ME!” 

Alphys was crying before she flung herself into Undyne’s arms. “YES!”

The crowd roared with applause and whistles, while congratulations were shouted, and then there was glitter and balloons. Papyrus is crying with tears of joy, Sans was just chuckling. 

“SANS! THIS MEANS I GET TO BE THE FLOWER GIRL!” 

Undyne jumps up, holding Alphys close to her hip while she was laughing, hiccuping and crying at the same time. “Papyrus, I Told You That You Get To Have The Highest Of Honor!”

“THAT’S THE FLOWER GIRL, RIGHT?” Papyrus basically vibrated in place. 

“No, Even Higher Than That.” Undyne beamed, smile growing sharper. 

“THE PRIEST?” Papyrus seemed to vibrate even harder. 

“NO!” Undyne yelled before pulling Papyus over and getting him into a headlock. “You’re Going To Be My Best Skeleton.”

“I KNEW IT!” Papyrus yelled. “AAAAHHH, DON’T NOOGIE VASH THE STAMPEDE!”

Alphys couldn’t imagine a better proposal. 

[ctl-yuejie]

HP!TayNew

part 4: warm on a cold morning

( 2.6 k)

thanks as always to @earthpodd , @bl-phillip @ziq-panda + @somewhatavidreader for the sweetest tags and comments (and still reading this fic ^^)

special thanks to @sluttynewwiee who is the owner of this plot bunny

read on ao3 (part 1 2 3.1 3.2 3.3 5)

Now that it was late October it had gotten too cold to swim even for Newwiee. Usually he’d cast charms in the winter to help him stay warm but now that a skrewt might be on the loose it was too much of a hassle to add protective charms as well.

Besides, Tay’s grandmother had sent two two-way mirrors so most of his nights were spend lying in bed while talking to Tay about everything they hadn’t found the time to discuss during the day.  At first, he had been confused as to why Tay would give him something this valuable.  But apparently Tay’s grandmother had intended to only sent one and keep the other for herself to stay in contact with her grandson, but had put both of them into the package by mistake.

Tay had decided to keep both and had later handed one to him.  Whatever Tay had been thinking, now they were talking to each other as much as they wanted, whenever they felt like it.  Which almost always ended up being in the wee hours of the night, thus messing up his workout routine.

So instead of swimming Newwiee had picked up flying again. It was something he usually did from time to time to clear his head, when everything around him got too loud and he didn’t feel like talking to anyone. Even if it was only for a while, the feeling of being not confined by the thick walls of Hogwarts was freeing.

From high above its towers the castle looked deserted. No noise could be heard from the ground and no one was visible from that altitude either.  Not only did people appear to be non-existent; his worries would shrink the higher he’d soar into the air.

Newwiee reveled in this self-imposed solitude.

Even though he had been the commentator of the last two Quidditch seasons at Hogwarts he had never tried out for the team. He enjoyed the full control he had about where he’d go and when he’d come back. It was the silence that he craved when he was riding on his broom.

But flying in lazy circles about the edges of the forbidden forest he found his mind wandering to his late-night talks with Tay.  Normally he’d fly to forget that there were other people around him, but thinking about Tay like this made him feel warm.  Going back to their last argument, thinking about a wittier comeback for next time or imagining what Tay was doing at this exact moment was something he found to be quite enjoyable.  

Now that they had gotten closer, Newwiee had started to invite Tay to go fly with him on several occasions.  Tay had declined his proposal every time.  When Newwiee had suspected that Tay just could not fly, Tay had looked insulted. He had taken proper classes in school and believed that he was good enough.

Truth was that he could barely hold himself up for long due to his fear of heights. He never acknowledged his phobia, convincing himself that the wobbly way he handled brooms was the same for everyone. For him there was no reason to go that high and fast on something this unsafe anyways.  

Newwiee asked him again on a Saturday.

Quidditch season would start soon and the grounds would get busier. Tay declined, using homework as an excuse.

He had no idea why he wouldn’t just tell Newwiee that he wasn’t that into flying. Finally, Newwiee had pressed him for a better answer, saying that Tay could just tell him if he didn’t want to hang out with him. But Tay had stuck to his excuse.

Having found refuge in the library he was about to open his books when he remembered that he had already finished his assignments.  Rain started to knock against the windows.

He wondered whether Newwiee was still out there flying his rounds.  It was most likely that no one else was on the grounds in this weather.  Must be lonely.  Or Newwiee enjoyed the solitude.  But if he did why had he asked him to join.  And why was he so adamant on not going.  Spending time with Newwiee was fun, classes had become much more exciting since they had hit it off at the lake and he enjoyed their banter and the insults they’d playfully throw at each other.

Nowadays, they spent most of the time during Astronomy classes lying next to each other while talking about everything. Tay would occasionally talk over Newwiee while he was in deep contemplation because he had identified the cry of some animal in the night, which would get him a playful nudge in return.

But spending time alone outside of class with just the two of them…

His stomach tightened. Every time Newwiee had asked him to join, he had felt sick just by imagining them flying next to each other.

It was not because he was busy.

Not because he disliked flying to that degree.

Not because he thought it wouldn’t be fun to circuit the school.

Not because he was afraid of making a fool of himself in front of Newwiee.

But because hanging out with just the two of them, away from the distraction by others, would make him painfully aware of how much Newwiee meant to him.

And how he must mean a lot to Newwiee, but not quite enough.

He didn’t know what to do with himself. Groaning he buried his head in his hands. Hoping that the rain drumming on the window would clear his head of all thoughts. Tay wanted to get out of the library and do something but at the same time it felt like he was tied down to his chair and any move he took would hurt too much.

He couldn’t really hide forever. They sat next to each other in almost all classes, so disassociating himself would be weird as well. 

And he really wanted to talk to Newwiee.  Bicker with him in class.  Argue about everything.  Just have him next to him.  If it was Newwiee he wouldn’t mind getting thrown out of Snape’s class for arguing, he wouldn’t care anymore about what teacher was scary or his grades or the reputation of his family.  His everything got centered around Newwiee.  But right now, it was all too much.

Tay returned to the Hufflepuff Basement late.

“No Gun?”, he asked upon entering their room. “He’s out enjoying himself.” Off was lounging on his bed, going through his clothes to prepare for the weekend trip to Hogsmeade. “Mhmmm.”

The room was weirdly silent.

“Yo, Peng. Looks like Newwiee is grumpy. He thinks you’re evading him. Gun told me.” “Mhmmm.” “You could just go and fly with him? Or tell him a better excuse.”

Tay grumbled something into his pillow in response.

Even though his night had been restless, Tay was up really early the next day. When his stomach wouldn’t stop rumbling he decided to go ahead to the Great Hall and have breakfast. There was no movement from Off’s bed.

Once he sat down on one of the long benches his appetite had vanished completely.  He nibbled on his noodles but just got grumpier by the minute when they turned cold and soggy because he was taking too long.  Lost in his discomfort, he thought about how to best act next time he saw Newwiee.

His head hit the table with a thump. Waking up early after getting close to no sleep hadn’t been a good idea after all.

“It’s disappointing that your head didn’t hit the bowl”, Newwiee piped up from across the table. “What time is it?” Tay mumbled while forcing his eyes open, too sleepy to freak out about Newwiee and him being almost the only people in the Great Hall. “Few minutes past seven.”  

He had only dozed off for half an hour.

Vision still blurry he sat up straight, Newwiee’s face starting to slowly get into focus.

Newwiee’s full attention was focused on a small gadget in his hand while he was eating.  They had met each other just yesterday but for some reason Newwiee looked different to him today. His dark brown eyes seemed to twinkle and Tay hoped that he’d look up and lock eyes with him. He caught himself wishing that he could make Newwiee laugh so that his eyes would vanish in a smile just for him. Every time Newwiee would take a bite of his breakfast his dimples would show and to Tay they suddenly looked inexplicably cute.  He felt the urge to trace them with his fingers. Newwiee’s cheeks seemed to be really soft as well.  In his head he was caressing Newwiee’s face, softly touching the mole on his nose, when his eyes wandered to Newwiee’s lips.

There was no way he could stop being close to Newwiee. Hanging out with him was too much fun, they connected in a way he had never connected with anyone before. It would be physically impossible for him to keep himself from interacting with him, from wanting to be near him.

Maybe it would hurt sometimes. But it would be worth it.  Probably.  He would be fine with just looking at Newwiee like this from time to time. Maybe.  Staying like this was the only real option he had, so he would just have to adjust himself with having these feelings.  Not knowing if he could turn back or if they would go away eventually he decided not to repress them. Hurting every now and then was enough already without forcing himself to change his heart.

Before he could get lost in his thoughts some more, he took notice of what Newwiee was eating.

“You are having cake?” Newwiee didn’t even bother to stop chewing, eyes never leaving the gadget in his hand. “It’s my breakfast.” “Cake is not a meal!” Tay insisted forgetting all about the recent awkwardness between them. “And soggy noodles are?” Newwiee shot right back, without so much as looking at him. “It’s all sugar. You’ll get even fatter”, Tay said in a playful tone.

Newwiee was not having it.  Without saying anything he just kicked Tay lightly under the table.  Off and Gun were right. He really was mad at Tay for evading him.

“How was…”, he started again, unsure whether Newwiee still wanted to talk to him. But Newwiee understood what he was getting at. “Didn’t fly after all. Too much rain.” Just the thought of yesterday seemed to dampen his mood even further. “Do you want to try again today?” For the first time this morning Newwiee looked directly at him. “Together?” Tay held his breath after the words had left his lips.

Newwiee sighed before kicking him once more.

“No assignments today?” Tay bit his tongue. He didn’t feel like lying again. Newwiee’s face finally softened and he nodded. “You should eat something before that though.” And with that he finished the rest of the cake and stood up to leave.

“Meet me in 10 minutes at the middle courtyard.”

Tay watched him leave, still feeling somewhat uneasy, unsure whether he had made the right choice.  At least it felt like some of the weight on him had been lifted and his appetite returned.

After putting on a thick hoodie and a huge scarf he wandered outside. Newwiee was already waiting for him, wearing only a thin sweater and holding a slick broom in one hand.

He scrunched up his face when he saw the school broom Tay was holding.

“Thought you were rich enough to buy a decent broom?” His annoyance with Tay seemed to not have completely vanished just yet. “Not that much into flying. Stop being an arse.” Newwiee stepped closer to playfully hid Tay on the back of his head. His anger seemed to have been resolved at last.

They got onto their brooms and took off, slowly ascending over the walls of the courtyard heading towards the Great Lake. The wind felt refreshing on Tay’s face.  In the distance the sun was climbing up the horizon, illuminating the geese that were flying over the water.

Newwiee chatted non-stop about the latest brooms, going on and on about the Siberian Arrow. His Firebolt Supreme was the latest model, but apparently not good enough. Tay teased him about needing a professional broom even though all he was doing was lazily fly over Hogwarts.

“Wait till you see me fly at home.” Newwiee hollered and Tay quite liked the idea of being invited to his home just like that.

“For what? To watch you show off in front of your parents?”

Newwiee suddenly pulled up next to him and nudged him in mock-anger. It was just a small push but it made Tay lose control over his broom and while he tried to steady himself he made the mistake of looking down.  While they had been talking over one another constantly they had gained some considerable height without Tay realizing it.  His hands on the broomstick became clammy and his whole body started to shake.

Newwiee immediately held onto his arm to steady him.

“Wowowow…you okay?”

Tay didn’t know why he felt so embarrassed. He was older after all. But be it in class or out here, somehow Newwiee always seemed to have the upper hand.

“Not a big fan of heights”, he managed to press out between gritted teeth, eyes still fixed on the ground below him.

Newwiee laughed softly. It seemed like he had come to the conclusion that Tay’s reluctance to go fly with him stemmed only from his fear of heights.  It seemed like he finally wasn’t holding a grudge against him anymore.  Tay wasn’t going to correct him. He didn’t want to complicate things further. Besides he wouldn’t know how to explain himself in a way that wouldn’t reveal his feelings too much.

“We can go lower than this.” Newwiee said softly. “Urghhh”, was all that Tay could answer. Unable to move, just the thought of dropping down towards the ground made him feel sick. Newwiee sighed but moved his broom closer to Tay’s.

“You can hop over if you want to. Just swing your leg over my broomstick.”  It was hard enough for Tay to raise his eyes and it took him several minutes to move according to Newwiee’s instructions.

After finally settling in place behind Newwiee he commanded the school broom to fly back to its shed with a swish of his wand, the other hand forcefully holding onto Newwiee’s sweater.

“That broom seemed to be very happy to get away from you”, Newwiee snickered.  Tay put his wand away to be able to hit him, but just as he raised his hand Newwiee decided to dip the broom, making them race towards the ground at a steep angle.

Throwing his arms around Newwiee just in time Tay screamed into his ear while clinging onto his back. The wind blew passed them with force, making it hard to breath.

Newwiee was screaming like a mad man until he finally pulled up again and they slowed down.

The wind had left his ears red and sore and his knuckles hurt from grabbing onto Newwiee too tightly.

Nevertheless, laughter escaped him as they flew over the Great Lake and he relaxed against Newwiee’s back, putting his head on his shoulder while watching the birds pass them by.  His breath evened out and turning his nose to the front he drank in Newwiee’s scent while closing his eyes.

If he could control himself like this, keep his feelings steady, then everything would be alright.  He could stay right here next to Newwiee and everything would be fine.

to be continued

part 5