#proper communication actually can further the plot even better

[snowgloberoundandround]

“How do we work together?”

“Well… we work it out”

Healthy conflict resolution?!???? In MY otp?????

[chatonarya]

Now that it's been a few days, I can gather my thoughts and write a more proper impression of The Rides to Lake Silberneherze (RS). I'll preface by saying, if it's not obvious by now, that Break The Ice (BI) was my favorite Arknights story, and I both anticipated and slightly dreaded the continuation of that storyline, as I felt the plot of BI ended so neatly that for a while I genuinely did not know how the writers could possibly follow up on it. When RS was first announced and released on CN six months ago, most of my fears were assuaged by the event's tone and overall opinions and hearsay from the CN side. What followed was then six months of great anticipation and excitement, and at long last, having read RS, I am extremely happy to say that it met my hopes and expectations in the best of ways. Spoilers below the cut.

Plot-wise, it felt rather similar to BI in that it's fairly self-contained, which is something I enjoyed. Despite the fact that much of the plot revolves around the Victorian presence in Kjerag and the Caster connection which was foreshadowed a while ago, the story still feels as though it's about Kjerag's problems and the Kjerag characters, as opposed to ZH where Federico and Arturia aren't even Leithanian. The external elements do not overwhelm the internal ones and the focus remains on the Kjerag cast, though Kjerag's problems are shifting somewhat now from their internal conflicts to external ones as they open up and begin to connect to other nations, but it's well-handled. As the clans get along and unite, naturally now they turn their eyes outward, and though the internal rivalry doesn't fully disappear, it's more tempered and friendly now rather than destructive.

Speaking of which, it was great to see the three clans getting along and working together with minimal vitriol. Ratatos shares information and resources with Enciodes and Gnosis, and Project One clearly appears to be a collaborative effort between the Browntails and Karlan Trade; they've clearly made amends from the events of BI where it was revealed that Ratatos and Enciodes really weren't so different. Though the Paleroches remain Kjerag's conservative faction, they don't seem to be quite as unfriendly to outsiders as before, particularly as part of their former attitude is explained with Arctosz's backstory and relationship with Tatyana (though admittedly we don't see much of the Paleroches this time other than Arctosz and his father).

I really also enjoyed seeing how the characters have developed since BI. It feels as if they've all changed, for the better, as if they've taken the lessons and experiences of BI to heart. Ratatos now shares more of her work with Sciurus; Sciurus is no longer as short-sighted; the Browntails and the Silverashes are properly collaborating; the Paleroches are less violent and suspicious, though maybe it's unfair to say that when Arctosz has his own arc that he goes through. Enciodes is no longer quite as reserved as before, seeming to delegate more of his responsibilities to others rather than attempting to "shoulder all of Kjerag" by his lonesome; Gnosis, too, has mellowed slightly in his time away and isn't quite as sharp-tongued or hot-tempered, not to mention Gnosis taking Degenbrecher's comments about both of them communicating poorly to heart in the end and not only thanking Enciodes for sharing his thoughts but telling Enciodes what he knows he wants to hear. Enciodes and Enya also both slip more into something like bickering siblings, both admitting that they don't actually disagree on that many things regarding Kjerag's development, but though it's clear that they're still going to butt heads in the future due to their different attitudes, their relationship is no longer beyond repair. Kjera showing more of her human side with her annoyance about her statue was very funny as well, further expanding her mischievous streak from before.

It was also lovely to see everyone again, even the minor characters like Valais and Gulo when they appear (however briefly). I'd also be remiss if I didn't say how much I was utterly charmed by the burdenbeasts, from their adorable appearances to their intelligence to how intertwined they are with the Kjerag people. (It's easy to see how Harold became a Kjeragaboo, shall we say.)

The highlight for me of course was the Karlan Trio. I think my favorite scene is the one at the end of RS-ST-2, where they're sitting about in the Karlan Trade lobby. I don't think I have enough words of praise to describe how wonderful it was to see the three of them letting down their guards, their facades, whatever pretense they wear for the outside world and just cracking in-jokes with each other, bickering affectionately, and laughing. The idea that the three of them are actually good friends beneath everything is something that I've long speculated on ever since BI, and to receive confirmation of it like this is more than I ever hoped for. And not just in this scene, but even in the smaller interactions and during the climax, where both Enciodes and Gnosis are openly worried about Degenbrecher, their friendship shone through, even though they often express themselves in a roundabout and tsundere way to each other.

The "miracle" at the end contrasts very much so with the one in BI, in a positive way. While in BI, Kjera is the one who uses her power to clear the clouds and aid Enya's descent to avert war, here it's quite clear that this time, the miracle was created by all the people themselves, working together and united, further underscored by Enya's comments about not wanting to rely on Kjera's miracles to always save them. It's another point that shows how not just the characters have grown, but it feels like Kjerag as a nation has grown, too.

The antagonists were also great. Harold's great reluctance to fulfill his duty as he becomes more and more absorbed in Kjerag's culture and society was good, as was his overall character as a cheery and talkative dandy; I have a great weakness for dandy characters, and he's just as fun as I hoped he was. His interactions with the whole cast were absolutely delightful. Trilby Asher's experiences as the great punching bag was downright hilarious as he was stymied at every turn, intentionally or not, by everything and everyone around him. I can't say I felt too sorry for him given that he acts more of a villain than Harold does, but the sheer comedic nature of his chase with Degenbrecher kept it funny and not cruel.

And of course, I must mention Leto. I had no prior knowledge or experience of her, but her headstrong, fierce independence and good nature won me over. I enjoyed her journey and her relationship with both Arctosz and Harold.

Finally, I must of course mention the one and only Black Knight, Madam Degenbrecher. She was perhaps my most anticipated character to be released from NPC jail, and I was incredibly eager and curious to learn more about her and her life. RS did not disappoint: it gave us an incredibly clear picture of the type of person she is, expanding on everything that was hinted about her in the past, from her forceful no-nonsense attitude in battle to her laidback nature away from the battlefield, to her dislike of people who chatter too much to her hidden humorous streak. Somewhere along the way while I was admiring fanart, I picked up the habit of calling her "Sister", as many of the CN fans do, and now I see that it truly is the perfect moniker for her. She truly is everyone's reliable and steadfast big sister. The way it's shown that she's truly of Kjerag now and one of them is so heartwarming, especially given her background as a destitute, nameless, homeless nobody. She has found her home, a place where she is loved and accepted, and a place that she's willing to put her life on the line to defend. It's just lovely.

Tangentially related, RS being a more light-hearted and borderline-comedic story overall was a very welcome change of pace. While I don't mind AK's generally grittier and bleaker stories, I think RS had a good balance between drama and seriousness and comedy and shenanigans. As I said earlier, I wasn't sure how the writers would follow up on BI, and I was in fact slightly worried that the overwhelming positive ending of BI would, in the continuation, take a downward turn into something that matched the overall grim tone. The fact that it did not is something that I'm happy about; call me biased, but I'm glad to see my favorite characters having a little breather episode.

Finally, I appreciated how the foreign elements were introduced at the end; again, they did not overwhelm the rest of the story, while also clearly leading into the future third installment. But this obvious sequel hook did nothing to diminish the ending, and I very much look forward to the next story and how it will mesh with other factions and conflicts. The Kjerag storyline crossing over with that of Rhine Lab was not something I anticipated but I have confidence that it will be handled with similar skill and aplomb after RS, and perhaps even will receive the prestigious anniversary/half anniversary treatment.

Overall, I don't really think there's anything in RS that I'm dissatisfied or disappointed with. It was thoroughly enjoyable, I laughed very hard multiple times, the plot was well-paced, all the characters were well-developed. Per my introduction, Break The Ice has long since been my favorite AK story, and I believe it's quite fitting that the one that's going to supplant it is its sequel, The Rides to Lake Silberneherze.

[dandelion-wings]

On thing about Mondstadt’s government that bothers me is that everybody boils it down to just the Knights on one side, and the Church on the other. Which, sure, they’re what we know the most about…

But it completely ignores the ‘Community Representative’. Considering their signature is one of three needed to (legally) make use of the Holy Lyre, alongside the Grandmaster and the Seneschal, they must be pretty damn important. So assuming they have equal power to those positions, which are at the head of the Knights and the Church respectively, what actually is that power? Presumably it’s an elected position (the title is that of a ‘representative’, plus I would be severely disappointed if there wasn’t even a hint of democracy in the Nation of Freedom), but is there a structure under it similar to the Knights and Church? Is there a completely separate civilian, secular government that for some reason just barely comes up? If it is elected, how is that handled? If both Grandmaster Varka and the Seneschal are on expedition, does that mean they hold more authority than Acting Grandmaster Jean and whoever is Acting Seneschal (assuming an acting-title’s authority, though still above everything else below the proper-title, is still considered secondary to that of said proper-title)? But if so, why hasn’t it come up? Or is it just some guy elected to act as a more expedient alternative to something like a full referendum?

God, I have an education in history and political science that is just begging for some damn answers!

I mean, I don't have an education in those things and am not real good at working those things out myself, so I don't know that I can provide you too much useful commentary here. XD;; But while I'd love if Mondstadt did have some democracy, I... am pretty convinced that it's a theocracy, actually. The Knights and the Church (which tbh seems to exist under the overall umbrella of the Ordo, given that Jean says in her voiceline about Barbara that "the order also manages the Church") fulfill pretty much all the governmental functions we actually see happening at all, including the whole thing in Jean's quest where Charles expects tax forms from her.

I'll admit I also lean that way because I read into Mondstadt as a whole (its history but also our introduction to it, where Amber initially nabs us for unauthorized entry and then there's a whole early section about gliding regulations) a theme of humans repeatedly being given freedom, and gradually rebuilding restrictions upon themselves. Which I don't think is entirely a bad thing, in that I do think communities generally function better with organization and administration and such, but, like, Mondstadt has gone all the way into tyranny before and could again. Mondstadt building itself an increasingly restrictive theocracy feeds into the theme I like drawing from it, so of course that's the reading I tend towards! But, still, that's where I'm at about it.

(I draw a lot of my read of this national theme from the line, "Mondstadt is the City of Freedom, but unchecked freedom without any kind of rules only invites chaos and anxiety," in Jean's character details, and I haven't seen anyone else talk about it, ever, so it's entirely possible this is actually character brainrot I'm projecting onto the city as a whole. I'm fine with that.)

Presumably there is a further government apparatus, but I tend to believe it's probably under the higher authority of the Ordo. Maybe with checks and balances, maybe not (exactly how I arrange the setup for fic where it's needed is specific to individual fic, because the openness of canon leaves the kind of room that makes it easiest to go with what works for the plot). "Community Representative" on its own is very vague; looking at the line where it actually appears, it's talking about the Holy Lyre in the context of the Ludi Harpastrum, so it could even be a role specific to the yearly organization of that particular festival! That said, it does sound a bit more like it's a regular thing, and given my presumption of theocracy above, I think this:

Or is it just some guy elected to act as a more expedient alternative to something like a full referendum?

honestly is the most likely possibility. It would make sense given Mondstadt's ethos and history--you have a representative of the community to sign off on certain decisions (hopefully elected, as you said, but who knows exactly how it happens), like that one about the Lyre, to show that the people agree. Possibly it's a triangle with the Grand Master at the top and the Seneschal (given the above "manages the Church" line) and Community Representative as equals who have input but not ultimate power on the next level down, possibly they both exist largely to rubberstamp the Grand Master and Seneshal's decisions, possibly it's an area-of-authority divide. Regardless of the exact divisions, Jean does seem to have some fairly unilateral powers in the areas of domestic defense and peacekeeping, but that's... something you do want the head of your military-and-police order to have, generally, so who knows how broad her powers actually are to act without the Seneschal and Representative's approval in other areas. The game is, as always, frustratingly uninformative.

Anyway, tl;dr: my personal reading of Mondstadt tends to render the Community Representative as relatively unimportant, despite the equal billing in that quest, because over and over again in quests and lore and voicelines we don't see anything but "the Ordo handles things," and Mondstadt honestly makes most sense to me as a theocratic city-state. I think they're more likely a representative "voice" in the government than a significant power, and I don't think they represent any significant "third branch" other than possibly, given Mondstadt's history, a symbolic reminder that its people have toppled tyrants before and can do so again.

[lumenflowered]

Hello. My name is Maria—nothing more, nothing less. I am a Faller hailing from a place known as Yharnam, though I am currently in the Johto region. It is a less harsh place than what I am used to; I would not recommend requesting further information regarding Yharnam unless you are mentally prepared.

Out of a lack of anything better to do after falling here, I embarked upon the Gym Challenge. At the time of writing this, I bear seven of the eight Johtonian badges, and intend to attain the eighth as soon as I have recovered enough to travel.

As of less than a week ago, I have been Chosen as a champion of sorts by Ho-oh, a Pokémon with power tantamount to the gods of my former world. While I still have rather complicated feelings regarding the matter, the gods of this world are considerably kinder than those I am used to, and doing this allowed me to put an end to Team Rocket's machinations once and for all.

My team is as follows: Rakuyo (Meganium, X) Hunter (Furret, F) Molotov (Arcanine, M) Adeline (Gengar, F) Evelyn (Seadra, F) Eileen (Honchkrow, F)

Adeline, my Gengar, rather likes to steal my device and make posts for herself—she is considerably better with this world's technology than I, so I have no qualms with this—and her commentary can be found in purple.

Though this has thus far only occurred once twice thrice, Ho-oh has utilized this platform and blog to communicate directly with me and others before, and they have done so in bold orange text. They have recently adopted another name in addition to their first: Solaire.

A very angry child named Silver, who inexplicably decided to form a rather one-sided rivalry with a grown woman, is unlikely to be on the blog again given how much the anonymous masses of Rotomblr set back my progress in having a reasonable conversation with him. However, while he was posting here, he used blue.

I am more than happy to discuss a great many things. Do keep in mind that I hail from a far deadlier place than this one, should you care to ask about my past prior to Johto.

...I still would rather like to know why and how I am here at all.

(OOC info under cut.)

Sup, it's still @ofstormsandfire getting perhaps a little too invested in my silly little blog where I throw a Bloodborne boss into the world of pokemon. I really wanted to make a faller blog of some kind, and promised myself that I could if I survived Nanowrimo, and... then I did. And went well, alright, Lady Maria's going to have a great time in Johto!

(That was sarcasm. Though honestly even a terrible time in Johto is an improvement over what she's used to.)

Do keep in mind that Maria is in fact a Bloodborne boss and as such will be unfazed by things that would disturb the vast majority of characters. I'll happily tag things as necessary, just ask if I've missed something you would like tagged.

Here's some navigational tags for y'all. If/when I actually reach the conclusion of this blog's story maybe I'll make more.

#firebird arc: I smashed together the Radio Tower plot and the Ho-oh plot, made the Kimono Girls more relevant, and also ramped up the stakes a little. Called that because Ho-oh is a firebird and also I'm 90% sure there's a kind of rocket called the Firebird. I like puns. I also put way too much effort into this and I regret nothing.

#the vampire allegations: A couple of people made jokes about Maria being a vampire. Admittedly, she is from Cainhurst which is the closest Bloodborne gets to proper vampires, and I thought it would be really funny to have her be allergic to garlic for legitimately mundane reasons.

#rainbow wings: That time Ho-oh showed up on the blog specifically to tell Maria to take a break. Same tag is used whenever Ho-oh turns up. (It's been like three times now.)

#what's with this sassy lost child?: The Silver takeover. For some reason the last couple posts just aren't showing up in the tag despite being tagged with exactly the same thing, but he got Pelipper Mailed bad memories of his dad and promptly dipped.

#hints to the future: Bits of prose foreshadowing things to come, because I got really into that one ask game with the gears.

[thelediz]

Sonic Underground Episode 21: The Jewel of the Crown

I’m watching Sonic Underground in search of inspiration to finish a fic I’ve been writing forever. It’s a sad state of affairs. See the recap of the first three episodes here, if you're interested!

The plot (for want of a better word): Legend says the jewel from Aleena’s crown will glow brighter as it comes closer to her, and Robotnik thinks he’s found it! Can the Sonic Underground find the jewel—and their mother—before their enemies, or is there more to this jewel than meets the eye?

Aleena starts off this episode talking about resilience (though she calls it determination), which is nice. I think that might have been better with last episode, but egh.

Manic has made an electronic bug to spy on Robotnik. Can I just say this is very impressive given that while I didn’t mention it, it was only episode 13 where he said something about how he’d never thought of himself as a mechanic. You’re not supposed to notice this evolution – the series never draws attention to Manic’s technical skillset (because he’s a Tails clone) but if you are a problem like I am, it’s a nice little bit of Manic growing as a member of the Resistance.

So once again, we have Robotnik technically engaging in his city country kingdom’s economy, by having a pawn broker offer to sell Aleena’s jewel to him. Robotnik instead wants Sleet to steal it. As a dictator, or indeed as any legitimate head of state, he could just confiscate it, but he doesn’t. I am a problem, so I take this as more political manoeuvring to make sure the aristocrats remain happy with him.

He also offers Sleet half the money the pawn broker wanted, which builds on something @shinymisty-blog draws attention to in other posts: Sleet is still acting as a bounty hunter with Robotnik. Dingo is the only one being a proper indentured servant… except when he isn’t. Stop questioning the character motivations.

Meanwhile, the Sonic Underground debates how they can get the jewel before Robotnik. Sonia points out that they’re broke, and Manic suggests they ‘liberate it’.

I am entirely on Manic’s side this time, but hey. +1 to Manic’s Thievery is a Problem.

Sonic, on the other hand, suggests that Aleena wouldn’t have sold something that could lead her enemies directly to her because that would be incredibly dumb valuable, so clearly the pawn broker stole it first, which Manic jumps on by saying they’re just recovering the stolen goods. Sonia is immediately on board now because she wants to wear a pretty jewel. We sigh.

Emporium, the town of today’s episode, is another not!Constantinople city. Furthering the comparison is the fact it’s basically empty.

Meanwhile, we discover that Aleena is actually working with the pawn broker! Apparently she’s set a trap!

You know, I feel like these things would work better if she found a way to communicate with her children about her little plots.

Somehow, despite talking about how hard it will be, the triplets find the right pawn shop without any issue. But when it comes down to it, Sonic refuses to steal even for the right reasons. Are all the kids in the audience paying attention to this lovely Sonic Says moment? Yes? Yes? Everyone paying attention to the lesson?

Before it can come to a head, the rug they’re standing on turns out to be Dingo. I am actually going to give the siblings this one, for once, because I also didn’t twig to it. Although in hindsight I should have – we saw Sleet earlier, but no Dingo, and they did mention the rug was an offer from Robotnik, but I absolutely didn’t notice the colour. Maybe I’m tired.

Anyway. Both the siblings and the jewel are now in Sleet and Dingo’s hold!

Except they leave the siblings behind.

THEY LEAVE THE SIBLINGS BEHIND.

THESE. TERRIBLE. VILLAINS.

The pawnbroker stops Sonic from chasing Sleet and Dingo down immediately, but can’t stop him properly. So it feels a little pointless to have that moment, especially when Sonic does still stop their van from escaping.

Sonic’s plan to get the jewel back is almost as dumb and convoluted as… honestly, Sonic.

For some reason, he chooses to flood Sleet and Dingo’s transport with olive oil. You’re the fastest thing alive and you can take on half a battalion of SWATbots single-handedly. When Sleet opens the hatch to look around, squirrel past him, grab the jewel, get away. It is THAT SIMPLE.

Idiot boy.

But it gets the same result, and he very clearly hasn’t stolen it from anyone because Dingo just dropped it. Totally different to some moral guardian or another, I’m sure.

The song: The Cosmic Dance. I… yep, I’m tired, I can think of no comparisons. It’s actually pretty good though, I don’t hate it. It’s quite cute, like the sort of thing you sing to three year olds to encourage them to play Imagination… except it’s using some stereotypical imagery about yoga, hot coals, turbans… what culture do you think you’re referencing, song, because right now I’m just getting ‘vaguely foreign’.

It also references MC Hammer pants, which is very funny.

Okay, so everyone has the idiot ball today. The triplets are literally standing two metres back as Sleet loudly tells Dingo he’s put a tracking device on the van, and yet they happily jump in the van to run away from a bunch of snakes without removing said device. TRIPLETS.

So Aleena’s trap for the jewel has led the triplets (and therefore Sleet and Dingo) to a building that is actually a living plant. Dingo and Sleet are appropriately creeped out by this, and call Robotnik. For… some idiot monetary reason, Robotnik saying he’s going to come and catch Aleena himself bolsters Sleet’s confidence enough for him to be excited to go after Aleena again despite being creeped out.

Also, weird hoodoo magic, Aleena. Interesting. Sonic’s connection to Gaia says what

Sonia’s super strength +1

The tree goes after the triplets until Sonic cuts it off, but weirdly also doesn’t keep attacking Robotnik’s forces. What?

The episode ends with the triplets realising this was Aleena’s trap, and Aleena quietly standing on the sidelines as they leave, professing that someday they’ll be reunited.

Honestly, that ending feels VERY final. A bit of a downer ending, but there’s something bittersweet and hopeful that makes it feel like a proper ‘and the adventure continues’ that should have finished the series.

Basically I’m saying this should have been episode 40, but it wasn’t.

The counters:

Sonic implying less than 100% American heterosexuality: 5

Sonia in love with Bartleby: 4/37

Sonia in love with someone who is not Bartleby: 1/37

Sonia’s got super strength: 4

Manic’s thieving Is A Problem: 4

So come back tomorrow if you’re interested in the next 18 episodes that probably should have happened before this one!

[fugazitn]

#3

I find it somewhat relaxing to be able to write long form into the ether. I think I initially liked that twitter mostly had texts causing the greatest stir in comparison to photos or videos which also did well on the app but my perception was that wit was enough to get eyes on your work but I still don't have the answer to that, I feel that AI bots, obvious rage inducing posts, and bad faith arguments are truly a poison to the body, soul, and mind. I could write in a journal which I have done for a number of years but I can't think of a reason to not put it out on this site instead. I have had 2 main thoughts that have been battling inside my head since I have been ill. Working on a short story that I feel could be compelling and the disasterous effects that winng a tournament has had on me. So I have been pondering the subtext of a story and was wondering the proper way to grow one. have an idea that I'm not sure I should put somewhere public becasue its the first time I've thought like this. It is a very basic premise but it is contorted in a way that I think should haunt the reader. I continually think of stories that have had profound effects on me. The grandiose feeling of having my life scralled out in pages by someone that has never known me connects me to the rest of humanity. I actually wasn't alone when I was at my lowest. I need that. I will be reading more to build up that phantom communal reinforcement to keep myself strong enough to hold many burdens whilfe facing the world. I will write an outline about it elsewhere because I'd hate to spoil you all of the bliss my work would provide because I would write it knowing the beginning and the ending to ensure the quality of the message. Which hopefully foreshadows my point in the next part. I won but for what? I won proving to myself that I was right that I could overcome the order of being the strongest player at the venue for a night. I won so every tilted night of frustation, every god awful interaction against better chacracters, every night I scrapped my entire gameplan and rebuild it with a new objective in mind had new value, a estimate that it was all worth it because I had accomplished what I had set out to do. I'm happy I did it. I'm proud that I wasn't a liar or a fraud which to say I put myself in the arena where I wanted to proclaim loudly and proudly: This is my game, I play it to become the victor and you are not stronger than I. No one can take this from me no matter what the circumstances. I can lose every game ever from this point on but you can't take away my triumph. I somewhat loss the abilty to enjoy fighting games casually it feels and that doesn't even mean that I need to play to win another tournament. I was called to win in sf6 with my favoriter character, It was a high among highs to someone like me. I had to do it with her or else I would've always wanted to. I was a contadiction in a way where I didn't want to work harder than others because as a competitor why would you stack the deck against yourself but then I couldn't back out with a character I loved. This is one of my many frictions that held me back. Any inconsistency in the headwinds can drag you further back than a focused but flawed mind. I can see all my opponent personalities in their playstyles but I saw that many tournaments ago which I think is why many may say that I have excellent reading potential for my foes. My mind is very free and I open to you beinf your worst because not many will fight me in my strong suit. While I have mamy thoughts I could puke onto this I must admit i'm losing the plot. Which is to say, if I lost would it have been for nothing? That's what it felt like not winning. Which has to be the most dangerous focal point to gave while competiting. There is definite meaning in sharpening your craft but to be chained to it in such a way made me resent it but I couldn't run from it all the same. A coward is one who never tries but I think the same could be for me who all I did was try. 1/2

[writingwithcolor]

I'm writing an AU of a movie that takes place in the 1880s USA, where a travelling white character and a Jewish character are waylaid by Native Americans, who they befriend. Probably because it was written by and about PoC (Jews) the scene actually avoids the stuff on your Native American Masterpost, but I'd still like to do better than a movie made in the 1980's, and I feel weird cutting them from the plot entirely. I have a Jewish woman reading it for that, but are there any things you (1/1)

2/2 1880s western movie ask--are there things you'd LIKE to see in a movie where a white man and a Jewish man run into Native Americans in the 1880s? I do plan to base them on a real tribe (Ute, probably) and have proper housing/clothes and so forth, but right now I'm just trying to avoid or subvert awful cowboy movie tropes. Any ideas?

White and Jewish Men, Native American interactions in 1880s

I am vaguely concerned with how you only cite one of our posts about Native Americans, that was not written by a Native person, and do not cite any of the posts relating to this time period, or any posts relating to representation in media. 

Sidenote: if you want us to give accurate reflections of the media you’re discussing, please tell us the NAME. I cannot go look up this movie based off this description to give you an idea of what my issues are with this scene, and must instead trust that the representation is good based off your judgement. I cannot make my own judgement. This is a problem. Especially since your whole question boils down to “this scene is good but not great and I want it to be great. How can I do that?”

Your baseline for “good” could very well be my baseline for “terrible hack job”. I can’t give you the proper education required for you to be able to accurately evaluate the media you’re watching for racist stereotypes if you don’t tell me what you’re even working with.

When you’re writing fanfic where the media is directly relevant to the question, please tell us the name of the media. We will not judge your tastes. We need this information in order to properly help you.

Moving on.

I bring up my concern for you citing that one—exceptionally old—post because it is lacking in many of the tropes that don’t exist in the media critique field but exist in the real world. This is an issue I have run into countless times on WWC (hence further concern you did not cite any other posts) and have spoken about at length. 

People look at the media critique world exclusively, assume it is a complete evaluation of how Native Americans are seen in society, and as a result end up ignoring some really toxic stereotypes and then come to the inbox with “these characters aren’t abc trope, so they’re fine, but I want to rubber stamp them anyway. Anything wrong here?”. The answer is pretty much always yes. 

Issue one: “Waylaid” by Native Americans

This wording is extremely loaded for one reason: Native American people are seen as tricksters, liars, and predators. This is the #1 trope that shows up in the real world that does not show up in media critique. It’s also the trope I have talked about the most when it comes to media representation, so you not knowing the trope is a sign you haven’t read the entirety of the Native tag—which is in the FAQ as something we would really prefer you did before coming at us to answer questions. It avoids us having to re-explain ourselves.

Now, hostility is honestly to be expected for the time period the movie is set in. This is in the beginnings (or ramping up) of residential schools in America* and Canada, we have generations upon generations of stolen or killed children, reserves being allocated perhaps hundreds of miles from sacred sites, and various wars with Plains and Southwest peoples are in full force (Wounded Knee would have happened in 1890, in December, and the Dakoa’s mass execution would have been in 1862. Those are just the big-name wars. There absolutely were others). 

*America covers up its residential schools abuse extremely thoroughly, so if you try to research them in the American context you will come up empty. Please research Canada’s schools and apply the same abuse to America, as Canada has had a Truth and Reconciliation Commission about residential schools and therefore is more (but not completely) transparent about the abuse that happened. Please note that America’s history with residential schools is longer than Canada’s history. There is an extremely large trigger warning for mass child death when you do this research.

But just because the hostility is expected does not mean that this hostility would be treated well in the movie. Especially when you consider the sheer amount of tension between any Native actors and white actors, for how Sacheen Littlefeather had just been nearly beaten up by white actors at the 1973 Academy Awards for mentioning Wounded Knee, and the American Indian Religious Freedom Act had only been passed two years prior in 1978. 

These Native actors would not have had the ability to truly consent to how they were shown, and this power dynamic has to be in your mind when you watch this scene over. I don’t care that the writers were from a discriminated-against background. This does not always result in being respectful, and I’ve also spoken about this power imbalance at length (primarily in the cowboy tag).

Documentaries and history specials made in the 2010s (with some degree of academic muster) will still fall into wording that harkens Indigenous people to wolves and settlers as frightened prey animals getting picked off by the mean animalistic Natives. This is not neutral, or good. This is perpetuating the myth that the settlers were helpless, just doing their own thing completely unobtrusively, and then the evil territorial Native Americans didn’t want to share.

To paraphrase Batman: if I had a week I couldn’t explain all the reasons that’s wrong.

How were these characters waylaid by the Native population? Because that answer—which I cannot get because you did not name the media—will determine how good the framing is. But based on the time period this movie was made alone, I do not trust it was done respectfully.

Issue 2: “Befriending”

I mentioned this was in an intense period of residential schools and land wars all in that area. The Ute themselves had just been massacred by Mormons in the Grass Valley Massacre in 1865, with ten men and an unknown number of women and children killed thanks to a case of assumed association with a war chief (Antonga Black Hawk) currently at war with Utah. The Paiute had been massacred in 1866. Over 100 Timpanogo men had been killed, with an unknown number of women and children enslaved by Brigham Young in Salt Lake City in 1850, with many of the enslaved people dying in captivity (those numbers were not tracked, but I would assume at least two hundred were enslaved— that’s simply assuming one woman/wife and one child for every man, and the numbers could have very well been higher if any war-widows and their children were in the group, not to mention families with multiple children). This is after an unknown group of Indigenous people had been killed by Governor Brigham Young the year prior, to “permanently stop cattle theft” from settlers. 

The number of Native Americans killed in Utah in the 1800s—just the number of dead counted (since women and children weren’t counted)—in massacres not tied to war (because there was at least one war) is over 130. The actual number of random murders is much higher; between the uncounted deaths and how the Governor had issued orders to “deal with” the problem of cattle theft permanently. I doubt you would have been tried or convicted if you murdered Indigenous peoples on “your” land. This is why it’s called state sanctioned genocide.

This is not counting the Black Hawk War in Utah (1865-1872), which the Ute were absolutely a part of (the wiki articles I read were contradictory if Antonga Black Hawk was Ute or Timpanogo, but the Ute were part of it). The first official massacre tied to the war—the Bear River Massacre, ordered by the US Military—places the death count of just that singular massacre at over five hundred Shoshone, including elders, women, and children. It would not be unreasonable to assume that the number of Indigenous people killed in Utah from 1850, onward, is over a thousand, perhaps two or three.

Pardon me for not reading beyond that point to list more massacres and simply ballparking a number; the source will be linked for you to get an accurate number of dead.

So how did they befriend the Native population? Let alone see them as fully human considering the racism of the time period? Natives were absolutely not seen as fully human so long as they were tied to their culture, and assimilation equalling some sliver of respect was already a stick being waved around as a threat. This lack of humanity continues to the present day.

I’m not saying friendship is impossible. I am saying the sheer levels of mistrust that would exist between random wandering groups of white/pale men and Indigenous communities wouldn’t exactly make that friendship easy. Having the scene end be a genuine friendship feels ignorant and hollow and flattening of ongoing genocide, because settlers lied about their intentions and then lined you up for slauther (that’s how the Timpanogo were killed and enslaved).

Utah had already done most of its mass killing by this point. The era of trusting them was over. There was an active open hunting season, and the acceptable targets were the Indigenous populations of Utah.

(sources for the numbers: 

List of Indian Massacres in North America Black Hawk War (1865-1872))

Issue 3: “Proper housing/clothes and so forth”

Do you mean Western style settlements and jeans? If yes, congratulations you have written a reservation which means the land-ripped-away wounds are going to be fresh, painful, and sore.

You do not codify what you mean by “proper”, and proper is another one of those deeply loaded colonial words that can mean “like a white man” or “appropriate for their tribe.” For the time period, it would be the former. Without specifying which direction you’re going for, I have no idea what you’re imagining. And without the name of the media, I don’t know what the basis of this is.

The reservation history of this time period seems to maybe have some wiggle room; there were two reservations allocated for the Ute at this time, one made in 1861 and another made in 1882 (they were combined into the Uintah and Ouray Indian Reservation in 1886). This is all at the surface level of a google and wikipedia search, so I have no idea how many lived in the bush and how many lived on the reserve. 

There were certainly land defenders trying to tell Utah the land did not belong to them, so holdouts that avoided getting rounded up were certainly possible. But these holdouts would be far, far more hostile to anyone non-Native.

The Ute seemed to be some degree of lucky in that the reserve is on some of their ancestral territory, but any loss of land that large is going to leave huge scars. 

It should be noted that reserves would mean the traditional clothing and housing would likely be forbidden, because assimilation logic was in full force and absolutely vicious at this time. 

It’s a large reserve, so the possibility exists they could have accidentally ended up within the borders of it. I’m not sure how hostile the state government was for rounding up all the Ute, so I don’t know if there would have been pockets of them hiding out. In present day, half of the Ute tribe lives on the reserve, but this wasn’t necessarily true historically—it could have been a much higher percentage in either direction.

It’s up to you if you want to make them be reservation-bound or not. Regardless, the above mentioned genocide would have been pretty fresh, the land theft in negotiations or already having happened, and generally, the Ute would be well on their way to every assimilation attempt made from either residential schools, missionaries, and/or the forced settlement and pre-fab homes.

To Answer Your Question

I don’t want another flattened, sanitized portrayal of genocide.

Look at the number of dead above, the amount of land lost above, the amount of executive orders above. And try to tell me that these people would be anything less than completely and totally devastated. Beyond traumatized. Beyond broken hearted. Absolutely grief stricken with almost no soul left.

Their religion would have been illegal. Their children would have been stolen. Their land was taken away. A saying about post-apocalyptic fiction is how settler-based it is, because Indigenous people have already lived through their own apocalypse.

It would have all just happened at the time period this story is set in. All of the grief you feel now at the environment changing so drastically that you aren’t sure how you’ll survive? Take that, magnify it by an exponential amount because it happened, and you have the mindset of these Native characters.

This is not a topic to tread lightly. This is not a topic to read one masterpost and treat it as a golden rule when there is too much history buried in unmarked, overfull graves of school grounds and cities and battlefields. I doubt the movie you’re using is good representation if it doesn’t even hint at the amount of trauma these Native characters would have been through in thirty years.

A single generation, and the life that they had spent millennia living was gone. Despite massive losses of life trying to fight to preserve their culture and land.

Learn some history. That’s all I can tell you. Learn it, process it, and look outside of checklists. Look outside of media. 

And let us have our grief.

~ Mod Lesya

On Question Framing

Please allow me the opportunity to comment on “are there things you'd LIKE to see in a movie where a white man and a Jewish man run into Native Americans in the 1880s?” That strikes me as the same type of question as asking what color food I’d like for lunch. I don’t see how the cultural backgrounds of characters I have literally no other information about is supposed to make me want anything in particular about them. I don’t know anything about their personalities or if they have anything in common.

Compare the following questions:

“Are there things you’d like to see in a movie where two American women, one from a Nordic background and one Jewish, are interacting?” I struggle to see how our backgrounds are going to yield any further inspiration. It certainly doesn’t tell you that we’re both queer and cling to each other’s support in a scary world; it doesn’t tell you that we uplift each other through mental illness; it doesn’t go into our 30 years of endless bizarre inside jokes related to everything from mustelids to bad subtitles.

Because: “white”, “Jewish”, and “Native American” aren’t personality words. You can ask me what kind of interaction I’d like to see from a high-strung overachieving woman and a happy-go-lucky Manic Pixie Dream Girl, and I’ll tell you I’d want fluffy f/f romance. Someone else might want conflict ultimately resolving in friendship. A third person might want them slowly getting on each other’s nerves more and more until one becomes a supervillain and the other must thwart her. But the same question about a cultural demographic? That told me nothing about the people involved.

Also, the first time I meet a new person from a very different culture, it might take weeks before discussion of our specific cultural differences comes up. As a consequence, my first deep conversations with a Costa Rican American gentile friend were not about Costa Rica or my Jewishness but about things we had in common: classical music and coping with breakups--which are obviously conversations I could have had if we were both Jewish, both Costa Rican gentiles, or both something else. So in other words, I’m having trouble seeing how knowing so little about these characters is supposed to give me something to want to see on the page.

Thank you for understanding.

(And yes, I agree with Lesya, what’s with this trend of people trying to explain their fandom in a roundabout way instead of mentioning it by name? It makes it harder to give meaningful help….)

--Shira

[kthynes]

the caller you have reached (chris evans x reader)

pairing: chris evans x fem!reader

summary: chris was trying to drunkenly call the woman he loved and wanted to get back with but instead he reaches you, a shrink.

warning: swearing (sailor level), brief mentions of mental health

**IMPORTANT disclaimer: I won't be dabbling into the hard hitting topics of mental health in this short only because I'm not a certified health professional and so I can't be providing a written, unbiased, often characterized diagnosis towards any sort of mental health disorder because really, those types of sensitivities need proper care and output. With that being said, I do want to emphasize the notions of seeking help and not being afraid to seek help when needed. It's hard, but we all fight a battle and no battle is big or small or better or worse.

If my followers or readers do feel the need to privately chat with me, I'm here and I can you lend you an ear. Otherwise let's be kind and uplift another while we can. No harm in doing good and being better, that's for sure!

-end rant-

This short is dedicated to the following lovelies:

@princess-evans-addict

@mrs-djokovic

@slut-for-chris-evans

@saltyflowermakertaco

@bitchyslut99

@patzammit

@itskikiyooo

@maximeevansblog

Being a working adult is dreadful but the work you do is the most fulfilling kind of anarchy. You are a therapist, you work to heal and you work together with people who willingly reach out to you and your facility of care. There is that balance, the altering nuances in between that allows you to do what you do best. You advocate for good prosperity of mental health and accolade of teachable moments that fosters a safe space for your clients, not patients, but the people who deserve to be heard and not be medically categorized.

Your salubrious passion keeps you grounded. In your lifetime, you've seen the imperial impacts of poor mental health and it has been a detrimental drive in how you retreat and give back to a small found community.

"Okay." You exhale to yourself while leafing through another client chart. You're working off the clock, stuck in the renaissance of your homey office space while the outside world turns pitch black.

In the appropriate fields you jot down important takeaways from your last sit in session with heavy concertation and reasoning, you try to congregate a treatment plan all before you cellphone cries for you in venturous fashion.

"Hello?" You answer without checking the caller ID, tucking the device between your ear and shoulder so that way you could work and talk.

"Jenny!" The man boisterously shouts. "Jenny baby please talk to me! Let me make it up to you, let's just do this right, please. I'm fucked up here."

"I'm sorry but you have the wrong number." You infringe sounding like the posh, automated answering machine lady.

"Oh what the fuck Jenny — oh cah'mon don't do that, don't be like that baby." You re-verify a local number and it doesn't belong to anyone you know of. So you wonder who this man is but choose not to press further instead you tell him what is right from the knowing wrong.

"I'm not Jenny."

"Seriously?" He yells, forcing you to hold the phone away from your ear. "That can't be... This is—" He recites the number that is similar to yours but the last two digits are off.

"You got 42, not 53." It's an easy mistake to recall, a swipe of a drunken thumb could've mixed that up, so this time around, you're forgiving. Not that it happens often.

"Oh no. That's—" The mystery man trails, something about his voice discerns you, it's familiar but in a hindbrain way that you can't put a finger on. "Fuuuuuuuck."

"Wait hold on, hold up, is this Jenny's assistant, Nina?" You exhale sharply sometimes it takes more than one try and a side of convincing to get your point across and your passiveness was certainly to blame.

"No I'm not her assistant either."

"Then who the hell are you?" He exasperates. You make the snide mistake of telling him your name and he buffers for a bit.

"Oh. So you really aren't anyone of my concern then?"

"No." You mildly retort. "I wouldn't want to be anyways."

"Okay well I'm not sorry then because I'm here trying to reach my girlfriend and I can't get to her because I have you on the line being a smartass." With that accent of his you can tell he's a patriotic Bostonian. One of your own kind and that furloughs your need to engage in this mindless drivel, it wouldn't get you or him anywhere. At least that's what you tell yourself before shutting him down.

"Well then maybe you should learn to listen first, how about that?" You snap, dropping your pen before you note down angry nonsense into your actual work.

"Hey nowwww!" He yells as if he's trying to be Hank Kinsley.

"It's clear that you're drunk."

He brushes you off on the other end, enigmatic in what he wants you to know. "This is Chris Evans, you're talking to Chris-motherfucking-Evans, you hear?"

"I do now." You say tersely.

"Good." He huffs. "Good... Cause you know I'm in the middle of bumfuck nowhere and this is what I get. This is what I seemingly deserve, god you women I swear..."

Your face changes. You don't agree to be a lending ear but somehow Chris forces you to hear him out.

"I told her Y/N. I TOLD her that I wasn't ready to take the next step but that doesn't mean that I don't want to be with her. And now she throws it back in my face by getting with some other guy she once dated back in high school. And somehow, I'm supposed to be ok with it and move on, as she tells me. How the hell am I supposed to do that, huh?"

"I, um, I don't know what to tell you." You sigh somberly.

"Of course you don't!" His Boston twang begins to nerve you as there some remitting frequency of it. Hearing him obnoxiously go off, reminds you of all your shrewd New England exes who were his exact counterpart when soused. A ludicrous memory that you relive again with time and perfect harmony.

"Listen lady all I'm saying is that I fucked up. I know I did alright? I mean it doesn't take much denominational math and the plot of Lost in Translation to get that. I get it!"

Jesus. You whisper the lords name in vain as you lean your forehead against the palm of your hand while your elbow rested on top of the desk.

"So, let me get this straight, you think yelling at a random woman will help get further?" You question a little acutely for his liking.

"I don't know but it sure as hell takes off the heat, sweetheart." Something about a man calling you sweetheart grinds your gears and now your molars.

"Okay, alright, let's talk." You begin, sitting up a bit and tearing out a blank page from your memo pad; you were doing a late night consultation, a small hash out.

"Schuwaaaaa." Chris enunciates the word sure and to much of his mayhem, he’s sprawled out on the curbside, somewhere in the nowhere land of L.A. He contented but also upset and you were simply crashing his little pity party.

"What is it that you want from Jenny?" You professionally prod. "How about we start there."

"Wooooah, what is that we're doing here?” Chris gets mildly defensive with you. “I dunno you like that. If we're gonna talk then you'll have to get through my publicist first because right now I plead the fifth.”

You exhale a deep and fulsome breath. No one troubles you like him. It's sanctimoniously unnerving.

"I'm a shrink, my job isn’t meant to incriminate my clients well-being, or anyone else’s for that matter.” You address calmly. “So, if you do require some solicited advice then we can keep this call under strict confidence. You have my word, Mr. Evans and the paperwork that will follow shortly after this call.”

Silence. There is some shocking silence which is brief before you're catapulted with disbelief and more cackles. "Holy mother fucking shit. You're kidding me?"

"I can run you by my credentials if you’d like?” You mention stiffly.

"God I’ve reached a cuckoo hotline!" Wrong. That's a horrible thing to say and you'd think a man like him would've been more sensitive about his choice of words, inebriated or not.

"Far from it."

"Tell me something, alright? How many grown, adult men come crying to you?" Chris is edging with curiosity even though his eyes are betrayingly reddened after crying into a bottle of Dewars 18. He doesn't make that known to you and you never cared to ask.

"Enough to know that they cry." You simply state.

"Huh. So this is just another Tuesday for you then.” Chris scoff, the bottle making it to his lips and then swishing back down again.

"Comes with the territory except I don't tolerate drunkenness." You motely add. "Can you keep the bottle aside for the time being? Just until we're done here."

"That's understandable and oh yeah sure, sure, I won't touch it." You can hear the glass bottle 'clink' when coming into contact with the pavement.

"Now tell me about Jenny." You softly inquire.

"What do you wanna know? How we fuck or how we met?" Chris giggles like a naughty school yard boy.

"How did you two meet?" You slam the words urgently, nearly spelling out the cause.

"Oh! Oh. We met on the job." Chris chuckles punitively.

"Okay and did you guys connect instantly or was there a slow build up?" You involuntarily took notes for any PR rep of his that wanted solid evidence that would preside this call, cover your bases and your poor ass along with it.

"Instantly. Our chemistry read was off the charts." He explains with a slight hiccup. "Sorry."

"Great. So it was more so a work relationship that later grew into something more correct?"

"Pretty much."

"So when did you start developing feelings for her?"

"Um I'd say..." Chris tucks his chin, burps and then excuses himself before continuing. "Just before we wrapped up filming. But then I think somewhere in between all that I realized that she was my kind of girl, my... better half."

"And what made you come to that realization?"

"Well for one she has this infectious laugh that would have you laughing with her, there's that sound of beauty and pureness to it. And then with that, there were all the little things she'd do for me that made me think, like damn she's the one, she's it for me and that for better or for worse, I'd need her more than she'd ever need me."

Chris gets sad and you feel for him. Your pen stops moving when you were about to prescribe him some mind memory exercises. He was human. Humans hurt. Humans make mistakes. Humans stray but they also love. That's all Chris did. He loved with all of his heart to not expect the same love in return.

"You know Chris, we don't always get the love we deserve and sometimes its sucks. Sometimes you wanna kick it back with a bottle of Dewars 18 and shake your fists in the air." Chris quietly perks up at your choice of alcohol that you didn't know he was forcefully downing. He fashions a small half smile that you don't see but hear faintly. "But there's also a time and a place and things happen, people come apart, people get together, people do people and there's that fine line of letting life run its uneven course."

"I mean you sometimes have to not be okay to be okay again and I know that from my many years of helpful healing. It gets okay, never fully better and I think that's just how it is. You acknowledge your pain, your trauma and then you go on while being mindful of that transition."

"Wow."

"Hey, um, look, I actually have to get going. But if you can, just down the rest of that bottle and get yourself home."

"Are you sure?" Chris gawks.

"I mean you were already halfway through and it's not like I can physically stop you, right? And besides this is what I'm prescribing to you. I want you to acknowledge your pain, drink away your sorrows and then smash that bottle so you can be relieved from that trauma and hurt. After that you need to fix up and start new, have a mature conversation with her, if you can and then have your feet hitting the ground again. Don't fall into the routine of heartbreak even if it becomes too hard, you hear me?"

"Loud and clear."

"Good." You sniff and start to put things away. "I know you're a good guy Chris, from how you are on TV and in interviews, I'm amazed by how articulate you are. You have the right mindset so I have no doubts that you'll fall back in any way. But if you do, please don't hesitate to reach out, I might have to hand you off to another cohort but nonetheless it can be worked out even if it does feel like you might be sparring on your own. You'll get the help you need."

"Great, thanks." Chris responds in his conscious state of thought. He feels pathetic with himself and that doesn't have you galling over the fact, instead you let him be.

"Do you need me to order you an Uber? Cab? Call a friend for ya?" You laugh easily and Chris hears it clearly, smiling in return.

"An Uber would be nice. I'll try to share you my location."

"Sure, on me and that'd be great."

"Thanks."

"No problem... And your ride should be here in two minutes, just look out for Raul in black Elantra." You inform him after checking your phone.

"Nice."

"You have a goodnight now Chris."

"You too." The line cuts and you're given a piece of your life back. You gather your belongings, flip off the light switch and make your way home. There's some truth and some brokenness in every situation. You knew Chris was going to be OK even if he didn't consult you afterwards. For you, there was no need. He's a smart man and he proves this over a prolonged period of time when he finally finds himself back on the market and then eventually in a relationship with a faceless and very loving woman from his own hometown.

He was finally happy, making you serendipitously glad that you were the caller he had reached.

[panncakes]

oh no bad buddy is the type of show thats going to lead to dumb essay writing on my dumb blog lmao

anyway, here’s what i like about bad buddy; everything feels earned. it feels like they understand that for a story to be good and have a strong foundation but also have good pacing every scene needs to push the plot forward and add to the character arcs. you can have cute and soft scenes, you can have over the top fight scenes, you can even have ridiculously obvious ads but if you don’t use them to put things into motion they just feel arbitrary (and it’s so prevalent in bls to just throw in a shippy or music or angsty moment and have them mean nothing for the overall picture because they don’t seamlessly work into the story or the characters). they are also incredibly good in showing not telling; the exposition dumps don’t feel as forced or needless as they do in some other shows.

the established feuds both in their families and faculties are ridiculous but they make sense for the story because they use time in the series to show us rather than simply tell us and it’s used very well to move the plot when it needs to. the pull between pat and pran feels genuine because they show us how it has always been there even as kids and that in turn is used to move the plot forward and build upon to have them reach a new understanding. them growing closer feels genuine because we are shown why they grow closer other than ‘two hot guys have tension and look at each other’s lips sometimes’. of course pat is interested in getting to know pran better and hanging out with him aside from them trying to keep their faculties from getting in trouble; they were sort of friends once! they have been a constant in each other’s life since before they were born! they have literally been brought up to pay attention to each other and surprise! they actually kind of work really well together! of course that is intriguing and fun; but we don’t just get them instantly hanging out and being buds; we get pat actively working to be friends with pran and because of that we get to see why pran is in love with pat. it’s not just because the story demands it; they put actual time and effort in showing why they work well together and why someone like pran would fall for someone like pat.

and it leads to the angst in the last episode feeling earned as well. i dislike the ‘girl in bl means drama’ trope because it is always handled so stupidly; i hate a lot of angst in bl because it always comes down to bad communication without valid reason just for an excuse to be dramatic and have a sad boy moment. but again it makes sense here because they took the time to lay the proper foundations and move them forward to get them to this point. it’s heartbreaking to watch pran so crestfallen; but damn if it isn’t done wonderfully and satisfyingly so. we understand his emotions because they’ve been shown to us; we are also given the time to understand and see that neither pat nor ink are malicious or bad people and it makes it all hurt that much more. and you bet your ass that this isn’t just a ‘bump’ in the road to half-assedly overcome and never to look back upon; it’s going to be another thing to propel these characters forward further into their arcs and since this is a very character driven plot it will undoubtedly move the plot as well.

idk i just like good story telling even in silly shows; it makes the wonderful genuine acting so much more satisfying to watch. it’s not a perfect show by any means; but it’s really very good and the characters feel real and it takes all these tropes and doesn’t necessarily turn them on their heads but executes them the way they should be executed instead of using them for dumbass attempts at nothing.

[regrettablewritings]

If it’s okay. Can I please request some LOVE headcanons with Jaskier, if it hasn’t already been requested?

Dang . . . We almost got an entire set here with Jaskier 👀

Who said “I love you” first?: You know it was Jaskier. Not only because you’d spent the entire time leading up to that point desperately trying to stifle your newly-found affections, but also because everybody knows that the loudest mouth on the continent has to have the first word. However, given that it’s Jaskier, you don’t buy it at first. For one, the man throws the word “love” around as, well, a bard throws around cheesy prose. Who’s to say that his dramatic gesture of spreading his arms wide and crying out gloriously, “Dear (Y/N)! I have determined that you! Are! The! One!!” wasn’t just another show for him? For another, as much as a part of you wanted to believe otherwise, a much larger part just couldn’t believe the possibility that someone like Jaskier could like someone like you romantically -- in whatever way “someone like Jaskier” could be taken. You initial reluctance to accept the bard’s confession left him a husk of a man, pouting and frustrated as he ranted to Geralt in the secrecy of a rented room at a tavern. All the while, the latter could only bluntly state that it’s Jaskier’s fault for having taken everything without much seriousness to it. His actions got him into this mess, he surely couldn’t expect for them to get him out of it. So he had to go the other way about it. You were very concerned when Jaskier got quiet. He’d already been acting strange for the last while or so, fumbling over his words and even struggling to babble on whimsically to jostle up songs. You had half a mind to assume that the poor fool might’ve been falling sick! But when he insisted he wasn’t, and that you still accompany him to the small plot of gardening land beside the tavern, your curiosity led you to oblige. You simply had to see where this was going. Hopefully to an explanation as to why he’d been acting so funny lately. In hindsight, the silly boy had probably scoped the area to find the most romantic spot. Admittedly, there’s not so many romantic associations one might have with raspberries, but there was a rock large enough to sit upon nearby where they were growing, which Jaskier apparently decided would have to do. It wasn’t a bench or a charmingly rustic fountain, but he still took it upon himself to treat it as though it were just as special. You wordlessly (if confusedly) followed suit, perching yourself on it per his request. Though, the temptation to leap right off of it struck the moment he took your hand into his own and locked eyes with you. You’d never heard Jaskier speak so calmly, so seriously, yet without a hint of graveness in it. You waited for him to reveal that it had been a joke, that he was using the moment to harvest some sort of song fodder from your response. But it never came. He just kept kneeling before you, awaiting your response, the hope in his eyes dwindling bit by bit in the moonlight the longer you went without saying anything. “Oh,” he finally spoke. Your heart could’ve shattered with the hint of trembling in that single syllable. “I, um . . . I suppose it is a bit -- it was a poor choice to -- I shouldn’t have -- ” No sentence sounded right to him in his moment of embarrassment. He tried getting back up, unlocking your hand from his, but your reinforced grip gave him pause. You shook your head, your heart beating so hard and fast that it hurt. And yet, the pain of it dulled when in comparison to the relief and bliss you felt.

What are their primary love languages?: Being the attention whore that he is, it would only be suitable that Jaskier reaps love and affection through words of affirmation and quality time. Yeah, he’s also a very sexual being, but he’s an entertainer down to the bone: It’s simply in his nature to desire your attention. When you spent quality time with him and give him praises meant only for him, you simply must be paying attention to him! And even beyond that, it provides the both of you means to communicate and get to know one another. (Well, more than you would already have to, given that you’re on the road all the time.) But for as arrogant as Jaskier is, that bardic nature goes both ways: It’s also in his nature to appraise everything to the highest and most flowery degree, as well as to throw that attentiveness to physical appeal right back at you. He loves being able to be physically close to you in any way that he can, especially sexually. And if he can make sweet and attentive love to you while also (literally) singing your praises? Worshiping your looks and your responses to his ministrations? It’s like he’s died and gone to heaven, a la le petit mort!

How often do they cuddle/engage in PDA?: Frequently, when the opportunity provides it. Of course, cuddling is difficult to do when one is on the road. And even though the ground isn’t necessarily the most ideal bed for it, being spooned can certainly help alleviate the dread of having to sleep on a floor that could become muddy soon enough. But that doesn’t stop the two of you from engaging in physical forms of affection whenever you can. You’ve never really been one especially for public displays of affection, but something about holding Jaskier’s hand as the two of you trail behind Geralt and Ciri just feels right. His hold is soft and warm, with only trace amounts of callousness due to his constant strumming on the lute. And when the group takes a break, you could think of nothing more refreshing than being able to sit at the base of a large tree and tuck yourself into the crook of your significant other’s arm as the both of you rest in silence, just enjoying the ambience. Sometimes, if you’re in an especially bubbly or affectionate mood, kisses wind up exchanged with no care on if Geralt or the child see you. There’s nothing shameless about giving your beloved a kiss on the cheek or even a quick peck on the lips, is there? Besides, the real shame should fall on Jaskier for always taking it too far by trying to kiss a line up your neck. It just gets taken up to an 11 when you actually have a proper bed to sleep on: The spooning increases, the not so sneaky caresses along the sides make an appearance, and the not-even-trying-to-hide-it attempts at lovingly groping your lovely bits are made because at least now there’s some privacy. And if you’re in the right mood and not too tired from your travels, you don’t mind indulging.

What are their favorite things to do together?: It depends on where the two of you are, but the one consistency is chatting and flinging jokes at one another. Jaskier fancies himself a man of wit so when you prove not to be afraid of playing along or hucking jokes right back at him, he takes it as a game. One of the competing sort. No matter how you may try, that game is going to turn into the two of you trying to make the other laugh or blush with some crude or colorful remarks. (And you can pretend you’re above it all you want, you’re clearly enjoying it.) He also likes how much inspiration your talks can give him, from you recounting the places you’ve seen to the people you’ve encountered (though you insist it’s nowhere near as impressive as he tries to make them sound in song form).

Who’s better at comforting the other?: As observant and intuitive as Jaskier can surprisingly be, this doesn’t always mean that he’s the best at using what he’s learned to calm the situation. If anything, his skittish and overly talkative nature can only drive you further into frustration if he’s not too careful. You know he means well, but Jackie can still be a bit overwhelming if one is already not in the best mood. But when it comes to calming him, you’re one of the best there is. At the very least, you’re able to distract him enough or praise him enough to where he’ll become a little less catty. He may be pouting as he rests his head against your breast, but he’s (not so) secretly eating up the proximity, how your fingers gently card through his hair, how warm your chest feels as it vibrates with your words . . . Words that are, of course, telling him what a talented minstrel he really is, especially compared to that hack of a troubadour, Valdo Marx. The moment you feel him smirking is the moment you know he’s let go of all pretenses of being upset — he’d felt good as new long ago. Still, you let him stay there.

Who’s more protective?: I suppose Jaskier, though the more fitting term would be “possessive.” Jaskier isn’t a very competent fighter (read: He cannot fight at all) so when it comes to physical well-being, he isn’t much good for keeping you any more guarded than however fast you both can run away from the problem. He’s more of a guardian when it comes to the heart or a person’s mental well-being. As embarrassingly idiotic as he can sometimes be, he isn’t so completely unaware as to not notice toxicity in other people. Unfortunately, he’s ironically not very good at vocally communicating this. As a result, he can come across as clingy or annoying. Which he is. But also, he doesn’t want you hurt and has your best interests in mind. Meanwhile, you care plenty for his physical well-being but also know you’re not much of a fighter, either. Besides, Jaskier’s gotten by on the road by himself far longer than you’ve known him -- apparently, he knows how to at least keep his head still attached to his body.

Do they prefer verbal or physical affection?: Both. As a stereotypical bawdy bard, he loves giving it, and as a humanoid peacock of a man, he loves receiving it. Let him lay his head in your lap while you stroke his hair and tell him what a wonderful performer he is, and how his voice makes you weak and yet empowered with desire --

What are some songs that apply to their relationship, in-universe or otherwise?: It may seem a bit rough to apply a song to such a musical man, but quite a few do come to mind: “Sweet Talk” by Saint Motel, “Put Your Money on Me” by The Struts, “Fall in Love” by Bad Rabbits, “Hands” by Barns Courtney . . . Now, if you take the time to listen to these or even look up some of the lyrics, you’ll notice a trend: A man pining for a woman who’s always just ever so slightly out of his reach. Or a man singing his delight for a woman who seems altogether unimpressed or at least hesitant to take a chance on him. Or the girl is just elusive. Which makes perfect sense, given that you’re one to guard her heart when in the face of the minstrel while Jaskier is the one putting his own entirely out there for you. But don’t be dismayed: Jaskier loves a good chase. His type is best defined as “someone he shouldn’t have or must at least bust his ass to acquire”, as one can assume from his interactions with concubines, higher-standing nobility, mothers, warriors, Geralt . . . But if you have a taste for something more optimistic or lighthearted, fear not: There’s always “Easy Way” by For the Foxes or “Undone” by The Bird and the Bee. What makes a song like “Undone” unique, however, is that it’s more for your point-of-view. Your feelings for Jaskier are complex yet so simple. He knows you’re not exactly the best at emoting, much less when it comes to your affections. But sometimes, you think that’s a good thing: If you were even half so brave or careless, the poor man might’ve died from your more frequent desire to kiss him to death (not that he would mind dying in such a pretty way). You can put on a calm expression all you want: Inside, you’re a storm of thoughts. You want to impress him, you want him to think you’re witty and bewitching, you want to be his yet one definite thing, you want to be the one who, well, can make him come undone with just a kiss. And it just takes you aback sometimes to realize that the very man, known for his philandering, already sees no wrong in you, and that he wants nothing more than the very same. With you and only you.

What kind of nicknames do they call each other?: It startled you to learn one day that you’d been calling him a nickname the entire time. In hindsight, yeah, it made sense: “Jaskier” was unusual as a given name. But you had grown so used to it and how it fit him like it was bespoke, that learning his real name was Julian just . . . It felt weird. Still, that didn’t erase the fact that, yes, Jaskier was technically still a nickname for him that you’d been using, knowingly or not. Though, every once in a while you would make an attempt to refer to him as something else: “Baby Eyes”, you realized, had some unusual sticking power to it.It’s normally used in an almost pouty tone, usually to accompany the pouting Jaskier’s already doing when you say it. Not in a taunting manner, but as if to extend sympathy. You hadn’t even meant for the name to keep reappearing but it just rolls off the tongue, especially whenever Jaskier looks at you with those blue eyes, fixed in a puppyish pout. He also seems to respond well to names that suggest his talent or genius, but we would be here all night running through the specifics due to how ridiculously and pointlessly long they are. The length of Jaskier’s names had actually become a bit of a problem even when in reference to you: It’s not really a nickname when your lover wants to refer to you as “Stunning Little Starling of the Northern Sky” or “Darling Daffodil of the Valley” and so on. He’s had to shorten quite a few down to “Starling” or “Darling” or “Daffodil” or “My Muse” or “Exquisite One, Conqueror of My Heart, Goddess of My Sleeping Hours, Patron Saint to My Loins --”.

Thank you for your patience!

[therewrites]

We Are Who We Are Overall Thoughts *spoilers*

This review will be discussing briefly some of the episodes so far, so SPOILERS

So I started watching the HBO original series, We Are Who We Are, and I am conflicted. When I initially watched it, the dialogue made it hard for me to enjoy it so I stopped. Then after a couple of weeks after its airing, I thought, what the hell? And this time, I was pleasantly surprised. I always maintain the belief that pilot episodes are either boring, messy, or just bad so I try to push past it in order to get to the good shit. The pilot for We Are Who We Are was...I’m not sure how to explain...different? It certainly wasn’t bad and it made an impression on me, but this show as a whole is hard to limit by just a few words. It’s really something that you should watch and experience yourself.

It was only after the first 3 episodes that I began to understand the tone and mood that Luca Guadagnino was trying to convey. A lot of the time, the dialogue is abrupt and choppy and can make no sense. It can be frustrating, especially when you have two characters that aren’t communicating effectively. But I think that was the point. Guadagnino is a very realistic director, he captures the most realistic elements in a film. A lot of the conversations between characters is meant to emulate real life. Like, what the hell do you say when a conversation becomes awkward? Well, nothing sometimes.

While Guadagnino’s typical cinematography may suggest whimsy, in WAWWA’s case the small structured and synthetic model of the military base is juxtaposed to the very concrete characters. When I started to view the show less as simply a televised airing of fictional characters and problems, and instead looked at them as people, I began to really enjoy it. 

Take the main character of Fraser, played by Jack Dylan Grazer. Fraser is meant to be seen as an extremely complex and troubled kid, but the difference between him and every other teen in a coming-of-age drama is that he isn’t polished. His drinking and drug habit isn’t framed as romantic or beautiful, in fact most of the time it’s portrayed as his weakness of sorts. In the first episode, Fraser has one of his mothers drive him home after getting pretty wasted and Luca graces us with a direct shot of him throwing up. And before that, Fraser is stumbling on a bridge when he drunkenly falls and cuts his face. Everything the character does is messy, uncoordinated, yet extremely real and relatable. Hell, in one shot you can clearly see him do a Naruto run!

Caitlin/Harper is a character that I enjoyed watching, as well. Jordan Seamon did a fantastic job and I really connected with their character. Initially we see Caitlin as this mysterious girl, and in the pilot we are meant to assume that their relationship with Fraser is supposed to develop into a romantic one. This is not the case as it seems that Caitlin is trying to come to terms with who they are. The biggest shift in Caitlin’s character isn’t their friendship with Fraser but probably when they get their period. 

This was a moment that even I related to, even though I am cis when I first got my period I didn’t tell my mom until the day after. The possible confusion and shift in their reality that Caitlin felt was only heightened with the conflict of their boyfriend wanting to be more physically intimate, and Fraser’s eventual discover of Harper. I would have like to see exactly why Fraser seemed drawn to Caitlin. I’m assuming viewers were supposed to think that Fraser is attracted to her, or something. But both Caitlin/Harper and Fraser are queer coded and their respective sexualities are alluded to not being straight. It would’ve made their standing as platonic friends more clear if this had been established stronger. 

I definitely think the writer could have devoted more time to giving certain characters proper conversations. It would’ve given more development to certain characters and better context for things. However even without that, there is a lot that the audience is showed that can’t be told through dialogue. The power struggle between Sarah and Richard being one. So far, there hasn’t been any explanation as to why they have a such a volatile relationship other than Richard being a homophobe. 

Through deeper inspection, I was able to interpret it as: Richard may heavily resent the fact the Sarah was promoted to Colonel and not him. It is never made clear who has the better credentials, Sarah or Richard, but assuming that she was the one promoted it is a safe guess. This may be highlighted by the fact that Sarah is a women, and also gay. Even before episode 7, it was clear that Richard did not respect her authority. I also interpreted it as Richard being upset that and openly gay women was promoted instead of him, a black man. 

Of course this is just based on my own personal knowledge of how the U.S. military can be towards people of color and LGBTQ+. Regardless, the competitive tension between two parents is palpable without needing dialogue to explain.  

When conflict happens, I can kind of figure out which characters are going to react and which one’s will stay silent. I think the show is trying to accomplish a drastically realistic and raw series. It took me while to adjust to it, but by maybe the 2nd or 3rd episode, it starts to grow on you. Despite not liking a good majority of the characters, I was very surprised by how invested I was in them. 

Like, Danny is my least favorite character because he displays very abusive and explosive tendencies, and doesn’t seem to care about the world around him. However, getting glimpses into his character and seeing how Richard ignores him for Caitlin/Harper, his suicidal thoughts, and how he is trying to reclaim his cultural and religious background makes me empathize with him. 

Even though I hate his character, I can see that he is struggling. I appreciate the way that this show freely shows dark skinned black boys dealing with mental health issues, and personal development. Rarely are issues like suicide talked about in the black community, so seeing Danny talk about it and Craig offering(admittedly poor)comfort was touching. This is a general vibe that I get from nearly all the characters on WAWWA. I also appreciated the how Danny is actively trying to convert to Islam. In shows, rarely is Islam ever portrayed in a positive manner. Especially when female characters are shown to be struggling with their religion, Islam is shown as this barrier that prevents them from living life. Hopefully it goes without saying that the “taking off the hijab” as a way to show that a female character is “liberated” is overplayed and does not offer any respect to the countless Muslim women who choose to wear hijabs. 

Now I think the pacing of some of the storylines could have been handled a bit more gracefully. Like how we jump from Fraser and Harper being kind of enemies(not really but you know what I mean), to just them hanging out in Richard’s boat was jarring. I would have at least liked to see the scene of them talking on the rocks at the beach. It would’ve given more insight on Caitlin/Harper’s character and also on Fraser too. Also how quickly Maggie and Lu(Jennifer but I love the name Lubaba, it’s my aunt’s name)jump into a physical affair. I just would have liked to see a build up of tension between all these characters but I don’t think this entirely ruins the plot. 

I was very iffy when I learned that the show would be focusing on trans identity and gender and sexuality, but not actually hire a trans male actor. I was afraid that the show would completely botch the experiences of being transgender, and honestly I don’t have the authority to speak on whether or not this affects the quality of the show. I am cisgender, and only can empathize with this particular situation as much as I can. But I would like to hear to the opinion of someone who is trans and elaborate on the ways that they did/didn’t like Jordan Kristine Seamón’s portrayal. 

Now at the time I’m writing this, the season finale has yet to come out. But I’d also like to briefly discuss the most recent episode and how it developed Jonathan and Fraser’s relationship. I was VERY worried that Guadagnino was going to take their relationship in the direction of inappropriate. While nearly all the depictions of Jonathan and his actions have been trough Fraser’s pov, it didn’t stop me from side-eyeing some of the interactions they shared. Of course after it was mentioned that Jonathan was supposed to be in his late 20s, nearing 30 I was immediately uncomfortable with the very flirty behavior he exhibited. 

So when the scene of Fraser going up to his apartment after Craig’s death, I was very on edge. If Guadagnino had gone the extra mile to show an even larger age gap then I would’ve been pissed. While I enjoyed Call Me By Your Name, the implication that sexual relationships between barely legal teenagers and adults well into their 20s was sensual is something that I see as very weird now that I’m older. So seeing Jonathan as the object of Fraser’s affections made me extremely warry. 

And honestly, I’m still surprised that the scene even happened in its entirety. I’m sure that Jack was not in any danger of being exploited but there were definitely points while watching I thought, what the fuck is going on? I was very worried that it would escalate, but I was happy to see that Fraser was the one who stopped it from going further.  It made sense to me that this scene took so many liberties to be as graphic as possible without being too graphic, in order to show why a situation like that would be scary and confusing for Fraser. It wasn’t lost to me that Marta and Jonathan were the one’s initiating all the sexual advances. They held all the power in that scenario, even more so because Fraser is younger and has the tendencies to not make the best decisions. Though it seemed that Fraser was trying, he knew that the situation was fucked up.

I’d like to hear what JDG felt and thought doing this scene. What was his character’s thought process?

I’ve seen a lot of people compare the show heavily to CMBYN, which is fine. Besides certain cinematic parallels that people pointed out, I don’t see the clear comparison. CMBYN is more of a love story and it’s more polished than WAWWA. Now when I say tat, I don’t mean it as a negative. Rather, We Are Who We is obviously more devoted to realism and its characters. I appreciate the inclusion of more LGBTQ+ people and black main characters with development, something that CMBYN lacked. And for some people who didn’t like the show based solely on the fact that it wasn’t a CMBYN tv show, I suggest just going into it with no expectations and enjoy the mess. 

And I’d also like to take a moment to commend Jack Dylan Grazer for his job in We Are Who We Are. All of the main cast are amazing actors and actresses and did a really good job bringing their characters to life. Though, I had always associated JDG with supporting roles that, while highlighted his acting talent, only put him in a one-dimensional light. As good as It 2017 was, JDG’s role of Eddie is only meant to be seen as a comic relief. In WAWWA, I was able to forget that he was teen actor, Jack Dylan Grazer, and really see him as Fraser. It’s worth mentioning that in a GQ interview, Grazer also mentioned how this role made him reevaluate is approach to acting. 

And after reading an interview he did with a Interview Germany, with him saying he spent months in Italy reading the script and trying to perfectly craft this character, I was immensely impressed. I hope that he knows that all his hard work payed off and made a really dynamic and interesting character. I really hope that in the future JDG continues with more mature or multi-dimensional roles because he displayed that he has the talent to do so. Him being so young makes me optimistic in knowing that he is definitely going places in his career. I also hope that there will be a season 2 of WAWWA because despite having hour long episodes, the show still felt way too short. There is a lot about Fraser’s character, and all the others’ characters, that I want more information and analysis on.

[fillingthescrapbook]

Rewriting The CW's Kung Fu, Part 9: Reflections and Moving Forward

And we have reached the end of our Kung Fu journey. If you haven't seen where we began, here's a handy guide to the previous posts:

Part 1: The Characters

Part 2: The Pilot

Part 3: The Mythology

Part 4: The Story Map

Part 5: Act I

Part 6: Act II

Part 7: Act III

Part 8: The Finale

Before I start with the lessons I learned and my other reflections, I want to thank @flailingbloo for all of her help and support in this endeavor. Without her to talk to and commiserate with, I would probably have gotten stuck in Act II forever and everything I've written would've been riddled with spelling errors and grammatical mistakes. So my eternal gratitude to flailingbloo. And now, we begin:

Lessons.

Going into this writing exercise, I already knew it was going to be hard. Writing stories is time-consuming, it's nerve-wracking, and it takes a lot of research...and patience. Writing, especially for television, is also not a solitary task. I mean, sure, the writing itself needs to be done alone--but everything that comes before, during, and after the writing needs input from so many people.

Although I have a lot (and I mean A LOT) of complaints about how The CW's Kung Fu was handled and written, I do have a lot of respect for the work that the writers put into their scripts. And I do appreciate all that they have done to have a show like this produced.

Doing this rewrite, I learned that it's really important to make the main character likeable. Like, every episode I broke down, I had to ask myself: is Nicky likeable here? Is she someone who viewers would want to root for? Like, for me she is, but only people who read what I wrote can say for sure. My perspective is now a bit skewered because I have bias.

Second, story maps are very helpful. There were times, especially during Part 6 (where I wrote breakdowns for Episodes 6 to 9) where I kept getting road-blocked by where I want the story to go. So I went back to the story map over and over again, to remind myself--where does the story itself need to go? How do I help the characters get to the point where they're ready for what needs to happen? (This is also where flailingbloo helped the most for me. Like, she really reminded me why I was doing this rewrite in the first place. Because I care about Nicky and the show. I wouldn't have funneled so much of my time and effort into this if I didn't.)

Another thing I learned, or rather re-learned, is the art of letting go. I created the character of Stanley to recur throughout the series as a reminder of who Nicky was and who she is becoming. And then I finished writing the first act without even mentioning him. By the second act, I was ready to use him finally--but, after multiple false starts, I realized Stanley was one of the reasons why I was having a hard time pushing Nicky's story forward. Because I kept trying to go back to the past. So I decided in the writing of the second act to shelve Stanley completely, only to find him popping up in the second to last episode in a, at least I hope, more organic way.

The last thing I learned in this exercise was that, whenever a new character needs to come in, I have to look at my existing characters first to see if any one of them can fulfill the role I needed for the story. Like, creating new villains for Nicky was fun, sure--but, at the same time, I realized that there were already existing villains that could recur. Like the Triad, who played villains in two more episodes after the pilot; and Henry's martial arts class at the community center became the source of two existing storylines from the actual show.

Reflections.

Do I think what my rewrite is better than the show? To me, yes. But, again, I am very biased. That said, I am proud of how I utilized the characters that the show created and didn't really give much importance to. Dennis, when he was introduced, felt like a rich character that could provide a very different point-of-view from the Shen siblings--but he was mostly relegated to being eye-candy. And I thought I gave him more meat by making him more involved in Althea's sexual harassment storyline, while also involving him in Nicky's stories.

That said, I also realize that I wasn't able to play up Nicky and Evan's past relationship as I was writing the episodic breakdowns. I was able to give them a lot of opportunities to explore their chemistry together, as I did with Nicky and Henry, but I kind of dropped the ball as a writer on guiding those planted moments into something more significant. Granted, I only wrote breakdowns and not actual scripts. Maybe I could've explored the romance angle more with a little sprinkle of direction and dialogue.

As I went deeper into the rewrite, I do see how easy it is to fall in love with characters as you write them. It's very easy to trap yourself into wanting villains to be more well-rounded. I keep having to remind myself that I don't have to redeem everyone. Just Nicky. Which became harder and harder as I went further and further into the story.

Another thing that became difficult as I went on? Keeping the mythology from just bursting open. That's how Henry, as I wrote him, evolved into becoming the son of a guardian--just so there's a reason for him to be so invested in Nicky's quest, while also having someone who can explain things to our main character. I'm actually really proud of that evolution.

All that said, I also have to recognize that I rewrote the show with the benefit of hindsight and the lack of budget constraints. In the real show, there's a group of writers who each have their own ideas of what the show should be. (This is where a head writer--not a show runner--would come in handy, so they could reel in the story to what needs to be told.) With more writers comes more chances for inconsistencies to happen. (And this is where a script supervisor, or a writing assistant, could come in handy.) And then there's production notes and budget. Not to mention, you know, the whole pandemic that's still happening. I didn't have to think about those things while doing this rewrite.

So, again, I want to give the writers kudos to actually producing scripts. I hope they haven't lost their minds--or their will to write--just because there are people like me who nitpick at everything. That's what people who love things do. We nitpick because we care.

Moving forward.

I do plan to stick with the real show for Season 2. I hope it's planned better. I hope they get researchers (plural!) and a writing assistant to help in the writing room. I hope the writers would sit down with the cast to discuss and develop the characters more. And I really hope they hire a better fight choreographer and fight director for the second season. (Like, rehire the people who choreographed and filmed the flashback scene in... Episode 11? The one with Nicky's maternal grandmother and Pei-Ling's own mother?)

I hope that the Nicky-Henry relationship gets explored realistically, and if a potential new love interest is ordered, they get introduced in a way that isn't antagonistic. Make them more well-rounded characters too, please. Make us want to root for their success. And while I think Nicky doesn't have an iota of chemistry with Evan, I do like Evan himself as a character. So I hope they get him more involved in future storylines--as an outsider looking in, sure, but also as an honorary member of the Shen family.

With regards to the Shen family, I do hope that we get to explore their relationships and dreams more before the show drops the reveal about Mei-Xue's daughter. I want Althea to have a cohesive storyline that doesn't pause for no reason. I want Ryan to explore being Asian AND gay as a first-generation Asian-American. And give the Shen siblings some recurring friends. They don't have to be semi-regulars (unless there's a story that can be explored) but let's not keep the Shens in a bubble. It was weird in the first season. Especially for Althea whose friends only showed up for her bachelorette party and never again. Not even when she was panicking about wedding preparations, which, considering how rich Dennis's parents were? They wouldn't let Althea be in charge of anything. They would hire a Chinese wedding coordinator. And an expensive and hard-to-book one at that. They donated an entire hospital wing, for crying out loud.

I want Jin to have an actual character, and not just be the supportive dad who loves his kids very much (admittedly my own rewrite also made this same mistake). And I want Mei-Li to be consistent as a character. Like, no more surprise twists about being the descendant of a legendary warrior without proper foreshadowing and plot-planting please.

Dennis shouldn't just be eye-candy. The same applies to Kerwin. Sure, I get that shirtless men are a must in a CW series, but please give their characters some meat too. Dennis's nerd-side was never showcased in the show, and Kerwin had that poor little rich boy background that didn't get explored either. Because the show was too busy keeping him and Zhi-Lan tearing each others' clothes off--when they're not tearing other people down.

Also, don't drop the ball on the tease that Bian-Ge is now everywhere. If I understood correctly, Bian-Ge is Kung Fu's version of Qi. If yes, then I hope they treat it respectfully as a force of nature--and not just the source of magic. The flowers from Bian-Ge itself can be magical, sure, I have no problem with a fictional flower being a McGuffin.

Finally, I hope the show also explores other Asian communities and cultures. Like, Kung Fu is great--but imagine if Nicky had to face someone who is versed in Silat Melayu? Or someone who uses Arnis? Someone who practices Kalaripayattu or Lathi Khela? Or Kuntao? Imagine Nicky having to use Wing Chun against someone who uses Karate or Krav-Maga? Asia is a big continent and there are so many different types of martial arts found from the Middle East to Southeast Asia. Kung-Fu is an umbrella term, so it'll be great to see the different styles found under it.

... This went long again. Sorry about that. Funny thing is, when I started this whole rewriting plan? I thought it would take three posts, tops. And look at us now. Nine posts deep, and it seems I still haven't run out of things to say. So I'm cutting myself off before I completely wear out my welcome.

But if you've read all my Kung Fu posts, please do reach out. Let's discuss the show and what it can do to produce a better second season.

[rachelbethhines]

Tangled Salt Marathon - Painter’s Block

Once again, we have a decent episode that winds up falling apart in context of the wider story arc. 

Summary:  Traumatized after the previous events, Rapunzel is feeling out of sorts, even having trouble painting again, and starts taking a class with a mysterious new art instructor. The other members of the class disappear one by one to a mysterious location by the sea, apparently painting an old, withered tree. The instructor is revealed to actually be an old witch serving Zhan Tiri (the monster who released the blizzard), released after the use of the weather machine and wishing to release her master as well. It’s up to Eugene and Cassandra to rescue Rapunzel. 

Tonal Dissonance Is a Problem

We start this episode with a recap of Queen for a Day and then we jump straight into yet another festival. 

Ok, ignoring that clearly a lot of time has past and no one hasn’t done anything to help Varian nor even mentions helping him; it’s just aggravating to switch from a serious storyline back to a supposedly low stakes situation without resolving the first arc properly. Yes, levity is needed to break up tension, but not in a way that distracts entirely from the narrative. 

Rapunzel Doesn’t Even Bother To Think About Varian When She’s Having Her PTSD Flashback  

Its a minor thing, but throughout the episode Rapunzel keeps having dissociative moments as she constantly hears voices in her head as she remembers the storm. Now I actually do appreciate what the writers are trying to do here. As some who also struggles with Complex-PTSD and dissociation, it's nice to see it represented here in some way. However, the fact that they leave out the key part of her trauma, letting down Varian, undermines these moments. Especially when they had no problem using Varian’s voice clip of “You promised!” earlier in the recap. It’s one of those things you may not notice it at first, but once you do it winds up distracting from the scene. 

What an Odd Place to Make This Reference 

Sugarby is quoting Ursula here, but I honestly don't know why. Ursula’s actual VA, Pat Carroll, does appear in this episode but she plays Old Lady Crowley instead. Sugarby’s VA is Ellen Greene, of Little Shop of Horrors fame. (and Rock-A-Doodle) You’d think a quote from that movie would be more apt. Also Rapunzel was admiring everyone elses work right before this, not talking about tough choices. 

Yet Again Cassandra Gains What She Wants, But the Narrative Refuses To Remember It

Cassandra’s beef in seasons two and three is apparently no one notices her or gives her credit for what she does, yet in season one she gets tons of recognition. Like here for instance, when her dad gives her a detective assignment on a missing persons case. To her specifically. He doesn’t ask anybody else first and isn’t running low on troops. 

You can’t have one of the main characters achieve their goal on screen several times and then act like they had never achieved it in later seasons. The audience isn’t dumb. We’re going to remember what happened and it’s insulting to the viewers for the narrative to pretend like what we’ve seen just didn’t happen. 

Friedborg is Wasted Here

I’ve talked about it before, but Friedborg is an unnecessary addition to the cast. However I bring it up again because this episode could have been the perfect set up for making her plot relevant. There’s tons of unintentional moments within the episode that could have easily served as foreshadowing that could have connected her to Zan Tiri, more so than any of the other characters. 

Trauma is an Explanation, Not an Excuse

This episode presents the idea that Rapunzel is procrastinating helping Varian because she’s reluctant to face her trauma. Which isn’t excusable. It gives reasons for her actions but those reasons are still ultimately selfish. 

Now, had the show owned up to this mistake, I would have no problem with using it as a point of conflict, yet the show constantly excuses Rapunzel’s behavior here. In fact the show excuses the behavior of several characters with the idea that so long that they had a traumatic backstory, they’re justified in their horrible actions. All but Varian, which a big double standard. 

However, and I can’t stress this enough, trauma is never an excuse for harming others. Especially people who've never done you wrong. 

Rapunzel spends several episodes ignoring Varian’s problem, long past the point of acceptability. And if viewed in the intended production order, the amount of episodes doubles. Varian is left alone for months, given the timeline of the show, and yet Rapunzel, the supposed adult in this situation, is never held accountable for neglecting a child.  

Xavier isn’t Tied Into the Plot Properly 

Xavier just so happens to have a convenient spell book that also just so happens to have all the exposition on the big bad that’s needed. It’s never explained how he got this book, why he has it, nor is it ever used outside of the first season. 

Xavier is plot important as the exposition fairy but the show never explorers him further than that and doesn’t tie him into the narrative properly, even though there’s plenty of reasons to do so. In fact Xavier will become just as useless as Monty by the time season three rolls around, even though he previously had the most connection to the ultimate villain. 

The Disciples Plot Goes Nowhere 

Ok, first off we get no real explanation as who these guys are, nor why they follow Zan Tiri to begin with. Why do they want Zan Tiri freed? What’s in it for them precisely? 

Second, what meminal backstory we get on these guys, contradicts what we’re told about them here. Xavier calls them evil spirits, but later we find out that they were actual real people who onced lived. You could call them ghosts if you want to, but that begs the original question of why they followed Zhan Tiri in the first place and why they continue to do so even in the afterlife. Simply being ‘evil’ no longer cuts it because real people aren’t just purely ‘evil’. They have goals and motivations. 

Finally, they accomplish nothing. They never wind up freeing their master. That happens through other means. They never connect back to Zhan Tiri’s own goals and motivations. They don’t add backstory to any of the other characters nor expand the mythos of the series. They’re just there to be a baddie of the week, and it’s is such a let down given what other hints we got for them. 

Sugarby Misgenders Her Master

So it’s clear that the writers did not fully figure out Zhan Tiri’s plot before they started making episodes. Given how animation works and how much pre-production time you’re given before you ever even start animating (which is several years btw), that’s a sign of mismanagement right there. 

Zhan Tiri is revealed to be a girl, but is referred to using male pronouns until that reveal, even by people who very well should know better, like her disciples. 

Also all these tree metaphors and hints come to nothing either, as Zhan Tiri is ultimately both freed and imprisoned without them. So what was the point here? 

Rapunzel Doesn’t Learn Her Lesson

This episode is suppose to be about Rapunzel learning to accept responsibility and owning up to her decisions even if it's hard. This should, sensibly, end with her taking upon her responsibility for Varian and following up with him. But no, we get a painting party instead. 

This isn’t Proper Foreshadowing 

So everyone acts like this painting of Cassandra in front of the moon is foreshadowing for her taking the moonstone, but it’s not. Not good foreshadowing, anyways. 

For starters, it’s not focused upon. Everyone is also painting stuff and crowding out what she’s doing so your eye isn’t lead to her

Nothing anybody else paints is a hint to anything later on, so why should the viewer pick up on this? It’s just a thing anybody could paint. If anything, Freidborg painting the void over there could have been some real foreshadowing cause that’s different and stands out, but it isn’t. 

It’s not on screen long enough to register for the audience. If you’re only going to notice something after the fact then it’s not a meaningful clue. Real foreshadowing has to be detectable and the audience needs to be able to plausibly figure out a twist before it happens or you’ve got a bad twist that’s not integrated into the story.   

There’s no other evidence to backup the twist. All we get is one framing shot of a mirror and that brief talk with Eugene in in the cell in Cassandra vs. Eugene. That’s not enough. And no, Chris claiming her ‘dress is blue’ as a hint is utter bullshit, cause there’s Freidborg right there wearing the exact same dress. 

If MoonCass was always a thing that the writers intended to happen, which we do have evidence for given released production artwork and Chris’s own discussions about the show’s development, then they needed to put more effort into establishing the character and setting up her arc. 

The very fact that viewers can easily pick out supposedly non-existent ‘hints’ with other characters like Freidborg and Varian, but not pick up on the actual twist, means that the writers failed to communicate clearly with their audience. That is on them and not the viewers, no matter what Chris says. 

Conclusion

This episode is frustrating. Much like the pilot, it offers up good ideas but then never properly follows up on them. To make matters worse, it winds up distracting from the plot that viewers actually care about rather than furthering. 

[kayliewrites]

Outlining Advice from a Plantser

If you don’t know the term, a “plantser” is a combination of a planner and pantser, names for writers from the NaNoWriMo community (also called gardeners and architects, discovery writers and outliners, etc.). Planners generally flesh out a lot of their story details before starting the actual writing process, while pantsers fly by the seat of their pants and hop in head first. 

Also, as a disclaimer, I recently was diagnosed with ADD/ADHD, so this outlining method may not work for you. This has been my way of outlining only for the last few years and helps keep me interested/motivated. 

THE KAYLIE METHOD:

Start with an idea. Any idea. It could be a line of dialogue, or an interesting character, a plot from a movie that you want to try writing yourself, or a song that you really like that makes you think “hmmm, this could be a good story”. Literally anything can be magic, you funky little bagel. (I usually start with characters, because I prefer character-driven stories.) 

Then start experimenting. Write anything. As much or as little as you want, in any setting, genre, filter, theme, or style you like. Try that character in twelve different settings before deciding you like 1950′s Detroit better than neon-and-chrome underwater. Give them an Australian accent, a Southern American twang, a Brazilian lilt, a Martian slur. Have your character make out with 50 people before deciding that they’re actually asexual, but that they still like kissing. A lot. ****

Now you have a foundation. It’s a weird, beautiful, messy combination of what you do and don’t like, but it’s something useful. And you made it. Good job, you beautiful water buffalo. 

Write. Like, a lot. Here’s where our paths will likely diverge. In fanfiction, I usually write eight chapters (five in original writing) here of exploratory writing in the proper setting with the right romantic endgame (or lack thereof) in mind, just seeing where the story goes. Maybe the characters reveal that there’s an evil sibling, or a villain I didn’t know about, or some other useful plot information I can use later. 

Now write your outline. You’ve already finished a good chunk of your story, and now you should have an even better idea of where it’s headed. I like to write down a list of things I’d love to see happen, in no specific order, and then cram them messily into a chapter list. Sometimes I get a good feeling for when an event should happen in the story, so I put those things in first. 

Edit as necessary. Throughout, I always remind myself that the outline is flexible. Sometimes a plot point gets pushed out two chapters. That’s okay!!!! It happens!!! Writing is art, and sometimes you make artistic choices along the way. Remember too that having soft, sweet scenes will emphasize the dark, biting, cruel scenes even further and vice versa. If I’ve been writing too much fluff, then I throw some angst in to change it up; if things have been too spicy for too long, then I add in some light. 

I hope this helps, especially with NaNoWriMo around the corner! I’ve been seeing a lot of outlining posts floating around too. 

Kaylie

**** The experimenting phase may also include creating a Pinterest board, mixing a playlist, drawing settings/characters/scenes, making your characters as Sims, and creating outside of the writing sphere. Don’t be afraid to paint, draw, knit, sing, research, play video games, sculpt, read, and seek inspiration. ****

[lgcrp]

GREETINGS, LGC SUPERSTARS!

we are officially ONE ! to celebrate the occasion we come bearing gifts !!! everyone who is in the roleplay as of today will receive freebie points as follows:

ACTOR / MUSICAL ACTOR MUSES : +20 ACTING ; +6 NOTORIETY

BAND MUSES : +20 PRIMARY INSTRUMENT ; +6 NOTORIETY

ENTERTAINER MUSES : +10 HOSTING / MCING ; +10 VARIETY ; +6 NOTORIETY

MODEL MUSES : +20 MODELING ; +6 NOTORIETY

PRODUCER MUSES : +10 COMP ( MUSIC ) ; +10 COMP ( LYRICS ) ; +6 NOTORIETY

ALL OTHERS : +20 PERFORMING ; +6 NOTORIETY

if you’re confused about what your muse has received, you can also check out the spreadsheet here. please let us know if there are any errors ! and also, you can link directly to this post or the linked spreadsheet as proof of points in your own spreadsheets !

below the cut we have messages from each of our admod staff !!! thank you all again for a wonderful first year ! we love you !!!

from admin l (el):

her message will come in the next post !!!

from admin * (kristin):

“wow! one year! funny how time passes so fast, huh? so much has happened in this past year: i graduated college, landed my first full-time job—not to forget the whole pandemic, too. but lgc’s always been the constant throughout these big changes in my life, and i’ve never been more grateful. i think i speak for a lot of people when i say that roleplaying, like any other hobby, is less about the actual roleplaying and more about the community—i mean, don’t get me wrong, i love my characters and the development i’ve had with them since their creation, but there’s just something about lgc that’s the reason i’m excited to log onto this terrible website everyday: and it’s you guys. i’ve been in the krp community since 2012, and it’s sad to see that it’s devolved into having more downs than ups throughout the years. i can’t remember that last time i stayed in a roleplay for more than a month or two, nor the last time i’ve created online friendships and connections as strong as i have here. i’ve been a member longer than i’ve been an admod, so believe me when i say: so whether you’ve just joined us or you’ve been here since the beginning, thank you. thank you so much for fostering such a welcoming and fun environment for everyone here. thank you to always bring such love and creativity to the dash, and thank you for constantly inspiring me. thank you for the excitement and the commitment, and thank you for understanding when i spend more than two months replying to a thread (lol). thank you for giving me and the rest of the admod your trust to ensure that our atmosphere’s only further expanded upon, not erased, and thank you for all the suggestions on how to make lgc a better place. it’s important to remember that lgc wouldn’t be what it is today without our members, so this anniversary is as much of achievement for us as it is for y’all. we have so much in store for this group—we promise, we’re not going anywhere!—and i personally want to honor the torch leo and ori have passed onto me as the new graphics admin. expect bigger and better things, lgc. it’s only the beginning!”

from admin g (grace):

"how has it already been one year since we’ve opened??? it feels like just yesterday when the three of us decided that we wanted to go through with opening up a new roleplay. i’ve admined many roleplays in the past, but usually, that initial lull of getting apps or the disinterest that ends up plaguing many roleplays in the early months has always left me disenchanted at the whole thing that i give up even before the six month mark so to hit such a milestone is really something remarkable for me. needless to say, it’s also just been amazing for me to be working with such a dream team who really fill in the areas in which i lack. however, at the end of the day, we also wouldn’t be here if it weren’t for all of you members. without you, lgc simply wouldn’t exist. thank you for helping this place thrive. thank you for always being excited about the events that we plan. thank you for being so willing to share your thoughts and ideas ( we’ve had so many wonderful events come to life because of our members’ suggestions and we’re always excited to receive more of those that we can incorporate ). from the moment we started brainstorming about this place, our vision has been for lgc to be an interactive community that would be shaped by its members and less by us as admins. we hope you’re able to see that vision come to life, and we know that we might be lacking still, but we hope to continue to refine our systems so that we can allow for more of that. finally, thank you all for loving my muses as well and for being so willing to plot with them. i know i’ve also been personally overwhelmed lately that i haven’t been able to plot with everyone, but i hope one day that my muses will get to meet all of yours. thank you again to all of you ( and also to all of those who have passed through lgc in this last year! ). love you all!”

from mod a ( cloud ):

one year already?? i’ve been in this rp for almost half of that and a lot has changed in those months! from joining the rp around march to becoming a mod, i have to say that it has been a pretty crazy journey! during my time in lgc, the one thing that always impresses me time and time again is the community that has been created and developed during the past twelve months. from a mun standpoint, it warms my heart knowing that the community is so welcoming towards each other. every time a new ( or returning ) muse is being brought to this lovely community, i love seeing how engaging and friendly the members are. not only that but there are also the posts that i see on the dash and while it can be a lot to go through sometimes, it’s reassuring knowing that people are willing to take the time to participate in these events and develop their muses! to me, these elements are what makes lgc what it is today and i hope that this continues in the future as well! i know that there are a lot of people i want to thank for but at the end of the day, there are two groups that i want to give my shoutouts to. the first is the admod team because they have entrusted me with this role and even though it’s only been a few weeks since i was appointed as a mod, i can attest to the amount of passion and hard work the whole team has with making sure that everyone has the best experience possible! i know that we can’t be a perfect rp, but we really do appreciate all of the feedback that has been given to us since that is what motivates us to become better. and ofc my second shoutout is to all of the members ( both past and present )! thank you for the support and effort you have given to the admod team! whether it’s posting on the dash to reading your reactions to the events, we appreciate all of that! i hope that this rp continues to prosper for many more years and once again, HAPPY ONE YEAR, LGC! 🎉

from admin c ( marie ):

“one year. it might not seem like a lot to some of you guys but when we created this project we didn’t even expect to last until christmas and that’s if we even got enough members to open. even though we’ve always planned for the long haul we didn’t think we’d be writing a first anniversary message in 2020. what a year, right? so many events happened both within our small community and in the outside world. i won’t lie, legacy requires a lot of work, organization and dedication. but we’re proud when we see you guys participate in everything with so much enthusiasm. i wanted to write a long and touching message but i can’t really find the proper words right now so i’ll just leave it as simple as possible. thank you for trusting us, for investing time and energy in your wonderful character, for choosing us and sticking around, for sending suggestions on events you’d like to see, for being respectful of us and the other members too. we could work our hardest and none of this would be possible without you guys interacting with it and being excited about it. thank you for being patient and understanding with us, and for taking minutes of your time each week to read all of the new events because we truly don’t give you any rest i’ll admit that LMAO. we’ve always wanted for lgc to be a peaceful, fun and stimulating writing environment for everyone and we hope we were able to be that for some of you. we’re still lacking and by no means perfect but we’ve always tried our best and will keep doing so for as long as you guys are on board with us ( or until we get a life maybe idk hghgjfdk ). i don’t know what the future holds but no matter what, i can say i’m proud of this project and how it turned out, not only with the admod team ( past and present ) but with every single person who helped build this place by just becoming a part of our community. i love you all and look forward to see your muses grow in the upcoming year!”

from mod y ( lissa ):

“thank you for putting your faith in us. words can never describe how much we appreciate you guys. ily all. thank you for putting your faith in us. words can never describe how much we appreciate you guys. ily all. thank you for putting your faith in us. words can never describe how much we appreciate you guys. ily all. thank you for putting your faith in us. words can never describe how much we appreciate you guys. ily all. thank you for putting your faith in us. words can never describe how much we appreciate you guys. ily all. thank you for putting your faith in us. words can never describe how much we appreciate you guys. ily all. thank you for putting your faith in us. words can never describe how much we appreciate you guys. ily all. thank you for putting your faith in us. words can never describe how much we appreciate you guys. ily all. thank you for putting your faith in us. words can never describe how much we appreciate you guys. ily all. thank you for putting your faith in us. words can never describe how much we appreciate you guys. ily all. thank you for putting your faith in us. words can never describe how much we appreciate you guys. ily all. thank you for putting your faith in us. words can never describe how much we appreciate you guys. ily all. thank you for putting your faith in us. words can never describe how much we appreciate you guys. ily all. thank you for putting your faith in us. words can never describe how much we appreciate you guys. ily all. thank you for putting your faith in us. words can never describe how much we appreciate you guys. ily all.“

[writingwithcolor]

Space based story with prison camps: problematic parallels?

Trigger warnings:

Holocaust

Unethical Medical Experimentation (in the post and resources)

ivypool2005 asked:

I'm writing a sci-fi novel set on Mars in the 25th century. There are two countries on Mars: Country A, a hereditary dictatorship, and Country B, a democracy occupied by Country A after losing a war. Country A's government is secretly being puppeted by a company that is illegally testing experimental technology on children. On orders from the company, Country A is putting civilian children from Country B in prison camps, where the company can fake their deaths and experiment on them. (1/2)

My novel takes place in one of the prison camps. I am aware that this setting carries associations with various concentration camps in history. Specifically, I'm worried about the experimentation aspect, as I know traumatic medical experimentation occurred during the Holocaust. Is there anything I should avoid? How can I acknowledge the history while still keeping some fantasy/sci-fi distance from real experiences -- or is it a bad idea to try to straddle that fence at all? Thank you! (2/2)

We are far from being the only people to have suffered traumatic medical experiments.. 

--Shira

TW: Unethical Medical Experimentation (in the post, and all of the links)

Medical experimentation in history

Perhaps without intending to, you have posed an enormous question. 

I will start by saying that we, the Jewish people, are not the only group to have unethical, immoral, vicious experiments performed on our bodies.  Horrific experimentation has been conducted on Black people, on Indigenous people, on disabled people, on poor people of various backgrounds, on women, on queer people... the legacy of human cruelty is long. Here are some very surface-level sources for you, and anyone else interested to go through. Many, many more can be found.

General Wiki Article on Unethical Human Experimentation

US Specific Article  on Unethical Human Experimentation 

The early history of modern American Gynecology is largely comprised of absolutely inhumane experimentation, mostly on enslaved women (with some notable exceptions among Irish immigrant women)

An Article on Gynecological Experimentation on Enslaved Women

I  also recommend reading Medical Bondage by Deirdre Cooper Owens

The Tuskegee Experiment 

First Nations Children Denied Nutrition

Guatemala Syphilis Experiment

Unit 731

AZT Testing on Zimbabwean Women

Project MKUltra

Conversion Therapy

Medical Experiments on Prison Inmates 

Medical Interventions on Intersex Infants and Children

Again, these are only a few, of a tragic multitude of examples. 

While I don't feel comfortable saying, as a blanket statement, that stories like this should never be fictionalized, it feels important to emphasize the historicity of medical experimentation, and indeed, medical horrors. These things happened, in the real world, throughout history, and across the globe. 

The story of this kind of human experimentation is one of immense cruelty, and the complete denial of the humanity of others. Experimentation was done on unwilling subjects, with no real regard for their wellbeing, their physical pain, the trauma they would incur, the effect it would have on families, or on communities. These are stories, not of random, mythical "subjects," but of human beings. These were Black women, already suffering enslavement, who were medically tortured. These were Indigenous children, who were utterly powerless, denied nutrition, just to see what would happen. These were Black men, lied to about their own health, and sent home to infect their spouses, and denied treatment once it was available. These were Aboriginal Australians, forced to have unnecessary medical procedures, children given brutal gynecological exams, and medications that were untested.. These were inmates in US prisons, under the complete control of the state. These were prisoners of war. These were pregnant people, desperate to save their fetuses, lied to by doctors. These were also Jewish people, imprisoned, and brutalized as part of a systematic attempt to destroy us. 

The story of medical torture, of experimentation without any meaningful consent, of the removal of human dignity, and human rights, is so vast, and so long, there is no way to do it justice. It is a story about human beings, without agency, without rights, it's the story of doctors, scientists, and the inquisitive, looking right through a person, and seeing nothing but parts. This is not some vague plot point, or a curiosity to note in passing, it is a real, terrible thing that happened, and is still happening to actual human beings. I understand the draw, to want to write about the Worst of the Worst, the things that happen when people set aside kindness, and pick up cruelty, but this is not simply a device. This kind of torture cannot be used as authorial shorthand, to show who the real bad guys are. 

On writing this subject - research

If you want to write a fictional story that includes this kind of deep, abiding horror, you need to immerse yourself in it. You need to read about it, not only in secondhand accounts, and not only from people stating facts dispassionately. You need to seek out firsthand accounts, read whatever you can find, watch whatever videos you can find. You need to find works recounting these atrocities by the descendants, and community members of people who suffered. 

Then, when you have done that, you need to spend time reflecting, and actively working to recognize the humanity of the people this happened to, and continues to happen to. 

You have to recognize that getting a stamp of approval from three Jewish people on a single website would never be enough, and seek out multiple sensitivity readers who have personal, familial, or cultural experience with forced experimentation.

If that seems like a lot of work, or overkill, I beg you not to write this story. It's simply too important. 

-- Dierdra

If you study public health and sociology, it is often a given that the intersection of institutional power and marginalized populations produces extreme human rights abuses. This is not to say that such abuse should be treated as an inevitability, but rather to help us understand, as Dierdra says, how often we need to be aware of the risk of treating our fellow humans poorly. Much of modern medical history is the story of the unwilling sacrifices made by people unable to defend themselves from the powers that be. Whether we are talking about the poor residents of public hospitals in France during the 18th century whose bodies were used to advance anatomy and pathology, to vaccine testing in the 19th century, to mental asylum patients in the 20th century who endured isolation, lobotomies, colectomies and thorazine, one can easily see this pattern beyond the Holocaust. 

Even when we shift our focus away from abuse justified by “experimentation”, we have many such incidents of institutionalized state collusion in abuse that have made the news within the last 20 years with depressing regularity. Beyond the examples mentioned above, I offer border migrant detention centers and black sites for America, Xinjiang re-education sites and prisoner organ donation in China, Soviet gulags still in use in Russia, and North Korean forced labor camps (FLCs) for political prisoners as more current examples. I agree with Dierdra that these themes affect many people still alive today who have endured such abuses, and are enduring such abuses. 

More on proper research and resources

Given that you are going to be exploring a topic when the pain is still so fresh, so raw, I think you had better have something meaningful to say. Dierdra’s recommendation to immerse yourself in nonfiction primary sources is essential, but I think you will also want to brush up on many established works of dystopian fiction featuring themes relating to state institutions and the exploitation of vulnerable populations. While doing so, read about the authors and how the circumstances of their environments and time periods influenced their stories’ messages and themes. I further recommend that you do so both slowly and deliberately so you can both properly take in the information while also checking in with your own comfort. 

- Marika