#profound bond his butt Cas! | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

supernaturaltropecelebration · 4 years ago

Text

In Lebanon

Author: @deanwinchesterfirstofhisname [AO3] Artist: @dmsilvisart Pairing: Dean/Castiel Rating: Explicit Word count: 88k Tropes: Alternate Universe, Forbidden Love, mutual pining Warnings: Graphic Depictions of Violence Tags: attempted rape with an object, mention of attempted rape, aborted sexual act (consent rescinded), graphic depictions of injury/blood loss, graphic descriptions of chronic/terminal illness, graphic descriptions of bodily fluids, graphic depiction of sex acts, canon-typical violence, canon-typical gore, graphic violence driven by homophobia, homophobic language, internalized homophobia, mild homophobia, homophobia with use of gay slurs, mentioned suicide, mentioned death of a child, description of panic attack, drunk driving, domestic abuse, frottage, oral sex, anal fingering, hand jobs, anal sex, Castiel/Dean Winchester, Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Human, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - No Supernatural, Small Town Romance, Mechanic!Dean, Nurse!Castiel, RN!Castiel, destiel, angst, hurt/comfort, smut, Bisexual!Dean Winchester, Gay!Castiel, Bisexual Dean Winchester, Gay Castiel, Bottom!Dean Winchester, Bottom Dean Winchester, Top!Castiel, Top Castiel, Switch Castiel, First Time, First Kiss, John Winchester’s A+ Parenting, Romance, Slow Burn, Dean Winchester goes to Church on Sundays, Protective Dean Winchester, Protective Castiel, Closeted Dean Winchester, Happy Ending, Hurt Dean Winchester, Dean Winchester’s Daddy Issues, Castiel’s Daddy Issues, mutual pining, Badass Dean Winchester, Badass Castiel

Summary:

Castiel’s father is dying.

As a registered nurse, he’s the obvious choice out of the four Novak boys to uproot his entire life to care for him, despite the fact that Castiel hasn’t spoken to his father in nearly 20 years. So he’s stuck living in rural Kansas with a cranky former pastor and a car that won’t run. Luckily the best mechanic in town takes interest in the broken-down classic, even convinces the old man to restore it. And that’s not the only thing Dean Winchester takes interest in.

Except in Lebanon there are things you just don’t do and Dean knows the rules. You wave at your neighbor, your butt is in the pew on Sunday and boys DO NOT kiss other boys. Castiel can’t be with a guy who’s still in the closet and Dean can’t convince Castiel that it’s safer that way.

That’s just how it is in Lebanon.

Excerpt Below the Cut:

“I think I need a medic.” Dean quipped and Castiel allowed himself the luxury of scanning Dean from toe to head, starting with the beat up sneakers on his feet, the tops of his crew socks pulled up ridiculously high on his calves, to his loose mesh shorts and sweat drenched gray t-shirt clinging to his stomach and chest. Castiel could practically see his pulse beating in his jugular, red faced and panting, green eyes fatigued and blond hair plastered darkly to his head. He met Dean’s eyes purposely then.

“You seem fine to me.”

Dean glared at him as he shifted on his feet, face turning redder in what Castiel let himself believe was a blush. Sam had made it over by then and clapped a hand on Dean’s shoulder. He startled, looking down where an average person’s face would be and stutter-looked up into Sam’s face. Dean’s scowl deepened.

“This is a family event Dean. Language.” Sam oofed as Dean socked him in the stomach, making Castiel jump.

Dean turned to him as if nothing had happened. “At least gimme some electrolytes or something.”

Castiel hummed as he leaned over and looked into one of the small fridges under his table, finding his Gatorade next to three or four pints of O-neg. He pulled it out and contemplated it before he peered up at Dean again, still panting and clearly miserable. Castiel held it out to him and Dean’s shoulders slumped, snatching it and undoing the cap. The vision of Dean tilting his head back and chugging the blue liquid, some spilling out of his mouth and over his chin, was well worth giving up his drink. Sam was watching too, clearly disgusted.

“Dude…” Sam grabbed Dean’s arm making him pause to take a breath. He wiped his mouth with the back of his arm before sucking in a deep breath.

“This is my annoying kid brother.” Dean belched before going in to finish the bottle and Sam looked absolutely appalled, though Castiel surprised himself by laughing.

Great. I have a crush on my mechanic.

“Sam,” Sam extended his hand and Castiel reached out to take it. “Sorry, I didn’t get your name.”

“Castiel Novak. Dean’s my mechanic.” Castiel said at the same time Dean replied. “This is Cas. I’m fixing his car.” The men blinked at each other before Dean broke into a rougish grin.

“Wait, did you say I was your mechanic?” Sam looked between them amused, and Castiel felt his face settle into a blank stare. Dean shook his head and grinned. “Well it’s an honor. A man and his mechanic share a profound bond.”

Dean offered his hand which Castiel took, face still stoic and Sam turned away to rub a hand over his face. Castiel thought he heard him mutter, “Sweet Jesus.”

#spntc promo #spntc #supernatural trope celebration #destiel

27 notes · View notes

shirtlesssammy · 5 years ago

Text

15x08: Our Father, Who Aren’t In Heaven

Then:

Fighting the good fight since 2010

Now:

At the Lucky Elephant Casino, God’s knocking back fruity drinks, playing slots, and murdering everyone around him. Things don’t look so fun in Chuck-land.

Meanwhile, Eileen is living her best new life hunting a werewolf. She’s kicking butt but has a temporary setback when Sam shows up. She shoves him out of the way to finish the job. She asks Sam if he’s following her. MAYBE he’s being a little overprotective, but c’mon, he did just bring her back from the dead. I’m guessing he’d like to keep her on the side of the living a little longer than a week or two.

Later at the bunker, they’re eating their respective burger (Eileen) and salad (Sam), and Dean walks in with the demon tablet. He’s hoping the tablet will reveal a weak spot with God. They’re going to need Donatello!

Cas knock’s on Donny’s door. Hmm, I see, divorced husbands still communicating about the case and Cas still doing things for the cause.

Donatello comes back to the bunker, but isn’t happy about it. He gets to work eating chicken wings and translating the tablet again. Sam, Dean, and Cas casually hang out in the library and sneak concerned looks towards the prophet.

Donny finds some footnotes written by Metatron about God’s secret fear that he only shared with “his favorite.” Lucifer was already locked away by the time the tablets were written. He must mean Michael. The problem with finding Michael is that he’s locked away in the Cage. Donatello starts to freak out over how overly dramatic TFW’s lives are but then passes out in a chair. He comes to --but it’s Chuck this time communicating directly through his prophet. He tells them to leave it alone. Then he threatens all the women in their lives if they don’t (and I just hate/love this because this calls back to early SPN so much when the women died for all their man-pain.)

They tell Donatello to go home. Then they all decide (Cas reluctantly) to go to Hell to find Michael. Dean sarcastically tells Cas that he can “stay here” at the bunker. And I can’t for the life of me find the post now, but whoever made a post of Dean increasingly going from sarcasm to flat out begging for Cas to stay at the bunker is my hero.

In the bunker’s kitchen, they cast the same spell Rowena used to get Cas and Belphagor to Hell before. Dean cuts his hand as part of the spell (something he’s done a thousand times before) and Cas takes the time to heal him (but doesn’t touch him like he normally does) and it takes so much of him to do it. I’m just going to sit here quietly for a bit before proceeding.

Once in Hell, Cas leads the way until they run into a bunch of badass lady demons that completely kick their asses. Well, they do until a very familiar voice bellows, “STOP!”

It’s ROWENA!!!

She’s now Queen of Hell. She’s also posturing up a storm. Ah. They tell her they want to lock up Chuck and they’re looking for Michael. She tells them he could be anywhere. The Cage opened just like the rest of the doors in Hell. She sends her demon minions to find Michael.

Back at the bunker, Eileen is watching over the spell, and she gets a call from Sue, another hunter. She needs help with a vamp nest. Eileen agrees to help as soon as she’s done helping TFW.

In Hell, TFW meets with Rowena in her throne room. She tells Sam that killing her was a good thing. She’s queen! Then she asks him to get her another drink (!) so she can have a little therapy time with the other two clowns. She tells them to “fix it” because there’s no reconciliation in death. A demon comes in to inform them that Michael “is nowhere to be found.”

For Perfect Framing Science:

Actually, he can be found at Jaci’s Red Wagon diner. It seems that Adam and Michael are good buds and Adam’s currently enjoying his first burger in ten years.

Dean checks in with Donatello just one more leeeetle time to see if he’s gotten any Chuck-adjacent flashes. Just when you think you’re out, yadda yadda yadda… He THEN checks in with Sam about Eileen. She is FINE, Dean, they have “an agreement.” Dean picks up on Sam’s waffling, and tells Sam that she fits the parameters of a potential partner: she knows the life, plus she’s hot. That’s way better than the life Sam tried to build with Amelia, a bag of limes, and a dog. This conversation is also notable for Dean’s admission that he’d been in a very dark place not long ago but he’s climbing out of it now.

At the diner, Adam continues to chill with Michael and contemplate the future when Lilith arrives.

She’s there to bring Michael to Chuck. “I’m not accustomed to being fetched,” Michael says coldly. It looks like things are headed towards fisticuffs when Michael just…burns her to ash right there. Ah, archangels. (Side note: I rewatched this section with the sound off while gathering images and watching her performance is every bit as engaging. I’ll miss you, scrunchy-nose Lilith.)

Donatello has a vision and sees Michael’s spiteful smiting (smiteful?). He calls Dean with Michael’s location. He’s in Cairo! Time for Dean to hop on a plane and hold Cas’s hand nervously the entire time… I’m ready for an airplane destiel fic episode!

Cas has an alternate, non-hand-holding suggestion. He’ll pray to Michael instead. In the quiet of an upstairs corner of the bunker, next to a REAL and also METAPHORICAL CHESS SET, Cas characterizes their last meeting as “unpleasant” and asks to meet up. “I’m not your enemy anymore. Now we all have the same enemy. God himself.”

Mmmkay, compelling words. Michael meets Cas in a warehouse. He remembers Cas. “You called me assbutt and set me on fire.” LOL, classic. Cas faces Michael stoically and lights a circle of holy oil around him. That’s the Winchester’s cue to enter and they do so with STYLE.

DAMN!

Dean presents a set of warded cuffs for Michael’s consideration. There’s clearly only one way out of the circle of fire.

For Check out the Curtains Made of Chains SO PRETTY Science:

Michael is twenty-five shades of pissed off at being confined. In the bunker he accuses the Winchesters of abandoning their brother and then shocks them all by flashing Adam back in control.

Adam seems much more chill than Michael and reveals that he and the archangel only had each other in the cage so they came to an agreement. Dean, who only recently stopped dragging himself around in a post-Michael traumatic haze, is gobsmacked that Michael’s letting Adam walk and talk. He tells Adam that there’s nothing they can say to fix what they did by leaving him in the cage. “How about ‘I’m sorry?’” Adam suggests.

Michael wrests back control and we go back to Chuck talk. Team Free Will attempts to briefly explain that Chuck isn’t trying to usher in “boring” paradise. Instead, Michael’s dad would rather see everybody suffer, including Michael.

Adam pops back behind the helm and advises them to stop their paltry attempt at convincing Michael of Chuck’s perfidy. On his (their) own, Adam unpacks the situation. He doesn’t forgive the Winchesters for what they did, but he does think they’re operating from good intentions. I don’t remember where I saw this online, but somebody posted that they have never liked Adam more than in this episode. I completely agree! There’s a lovely amount of complexity and growth hinted at through this performance.

Michael finds it hard to shake off a near-eternity of being God’s favored son. God is “having a mid-eternity crisis,” Adam suggests. Maybe Michael should at least entertain the possibility that Chuck isn’t on the up-and-up. Michael doesn’t want to doubt his father. “You still care about that after he left you in the cage?” Adam asks.

Meanwhile, Eileen’s friend Sue calls again. She’s ready to move on the vamps and needs backup NOW. When Eileen hesitates, Sue needles her about having to ask for permission. Eileen rises to Sue’s barb and agrees to meet up. The camera tumbles, Sue swears, and Eileen acts immediately as the call ends. She races to Sam’s room and fills him in on her friend’s perilous situation. Together, they run off to give Sue backup. (I love how this scene both shows Eileen’s need to assert her own independence and her absolute trust and pragmatism in getting Sam to back her up.)

Cas heads in to speak with Adam/Michael. Michael is still not on board the fight-Chuck train. Cas responds with sass, as is his custom. “I never liked you. I thought you were too haughty. Too…to paraphrase a friend, you had an entire oak tree shoved up your ass.”

Now Cas finds him pitiable. Michael isn’t God’s favorite. He’s just a tiny part of Chuck’s favorite soap opera. DAMN, Cas.

Cas goes even further, telling Michael that Lucifer was the smart one all along, and Michael SNAPS. He flips Cas over the table and gets him in a headlock. Cas struggles, and manages to lock both his hands on Michael’s temples. It’s brain zapping time! Even an archangel is no match for Cas’s mind mojo, and Cas dumps a clip show of Chuck being a dick writer into Michael’s head.

Later, Cas decompresses alone in the kitchen. Dean arrives, then suggests that Cas might have misjudged the situation and gone too far with Michael. D E A N. Before Cas left, Michael essentially said, “Leave. Get out. I want you dead.” We’ve all been in agony for several days now over the parallels between this line and what Cas thinks he’s getting from Dean and AAAAUGH THE SWEET PAIN OF IT. “We didn’t bond,” Cas summarizes. If you need me, I’ll be hunched in this burning dumpster, muttering about profound bonds.

The bunker rattles, and they race to Michael’s room. He greets them with, “God lied to me.” He gave everything for Chuck, but it turns out he’s not even unique across the multiverse if there are other Michaels out there.

Sam and Eileen arrive at the hunt and discover abandoned vehicles. Sam’s suspicion bone is tingling, but then Sue shows up. She’s got this swagger, so Boris and I immediately assume she’s been turned into a vamp because we’ve been watching this show since forever. Uh, Sue’s not a vamp. She’s Chuck! Or…you know, Chuck’s her! [Admiral Ackbar voice] It’s a trap!

Michael agrees to help Team Free Will. He pulls out a slip of paper with a spell on it that can contain Chuck just like it contained Amara. All they need is myrrh, cassia, rock-rose, and the nectar of a leviathan blossom. It’s a flower that grows in Purgatory. Michael opens up a rift-style door with the snap of his fingers.

The door will stay open for twelve hours. Dean uncuffs Michael/Adam and apologizes for what happened to his half brother. Adam smiles sadly and wishes them luck in their Chuck-fighting endeavors. After he/they leave, Cas and Dean turn towards the glowing rift. It’s Purgatory time, baby! And you know what they say about Purgatory. It’s the perfect place to work out your emotions in a friendly, non-deadly environment!

Quotingmoon in Purgatory:

There’s a crack in his invincibility shield

When I go crazy again, just shoot me

Usually I enjoy our little process. I toss something at you guys and you slam it right back. It’s fun! Like tennis! With monsters

What am I picking up from you two? A wee tif? Tell your Auntie Rowena

Why would he send you, a demon, a speck of infernal bile?

Oh, I didn’t come to beg

Since when do we get what we deserve?

Want to read more? Check out our Recap Archive!

#spn recap #spn 15x08 #our father who aren't in heaven #dean winchester #sam winchester #castiel #cas #chuck shurley #eileen leahy #rowena macleod #donatello redfield #adam milligan #michael #lillith #supernatural season 15

81 notes · View notes

destiel-love-forever · 5 years ago

Text

Clingy but Cute

Insp. (HERE): “Deaged dean following cas everywhere, not wanting to do anything if cas isn't there, always running after him and gripping the back of his trench coat "cas don't leave!!" even if cas was just going to his room and coming back in less than a minute and sam watches them wondering if this is just a normal thing for a little kid to do or if this just dean's deep fear of losing cas emerging.”

- Inspired by Tumblr Post (Above) by @bend-me-shape-me. Fic requested by @ladystiltskin67 , @blazeeblake , @tinyteacupsfan , @joham-fate , @corvus-chick , @transparentparadisglitterzombie

Read below or on AO3: HERE

Clingy but Cute

When the dust settles, Sam pushes to his feet and cradles his injured wrist to his chest. He scans the area, eyes flitting over Castiel who is currently brushing off his trench coat, and the now dead witch lying on the ground, before falling on a small bundled up figure in what seems to be Dean's flannel.

"Dean?" Sam asks in a brittle voice.

The ball of flannel squeaks before tilting his face up to look at the very tall Sammy in front of him. Wide green eyes full of fear and confusion study Sam for a moment. Then Dean's pushing out his little bottom lip into an adorable pout, tiny freckled nose wrinkling.

"Wait," Castiel says slowly, pointing at Dean with an eyebrow raised. "You're saying that's Dean?"

"Pretty damn sure. Witch must have gotten a curse in before we ganked her."

As Sam talks, he gestures to the dead witch just a foot or two away. Dean looks over in that direction and releases a distressed cry, his little body beginning to tremble as he stares at the bloody witch that still has an angel blade sticking out of her.

"Do you think he understands what's happening?" Castiel asks in concern.

"Considering he's the one who put that blade in her, and the way he's now reacting, I'm thinking not."

Castiel looks down at Dean, anxious blue eyes scanning the tiny human. "We have to get him somewhere safe. Back to the bunker. Maybe Rowena will know what to do."

"Yeah. Good plan," Sam says, feeling a little better now. "Okay, Dean. Let's go for a ride in the car!"

Dean whimpers as Sam moves closer to him, eyebrows pulling in. He glances over at Castiel before deciding he's the safer option. It takes a lot of work to get to the angel, since Dean has to climb out of the grown-up jeans his stubby legs are trapped in, but then he's running across the open area, butt naked other than the baggy flannel sliding off one of his shoulders. He throws his arms up the second he's in reaching distance to Castiel, silently commanding the angel to pick him up. When Castiel doesn't get the memo, Dean shuffles closer and tugs on his trench coat, then lifts his arms again while making grabby hands. "Up, up! Dean go up!"

Heart melting, Castiel squats down and scoops the boy up. He cradles Dean to his chest and rearranges the flannel so Dean is mostly covered, knowing the boy could catch a cold if he went outside unprotected.

"I don't know why he's afraid of me," Sam mumbles as they walk out of the warehouse and toward the Impala.

“Well, you’re rather large,” Castiel points out. “And we do share a more-”

“Profound bond,” Sam finishes with an eye roll. “Yes. I’m aware.”

Smiling to himself, Castiel tightens his hold on Dean and kisses the top of his head. Sam can be crabby all he wants. Dean is damn adorable. And it’s not like this will be permanent. It’s probably a simple fix. So, Castiel is going to enjoy himself. He’s going to monopolize on all of the Dean cuddles and warm and fuzzies, making the boy feel loved and cared for until it’s time for him to get thrust back in the adult body that’s weighed down with far too much responsibility.

----

Dean sits in the man who was carrying him’s lap with his tiny fingers curled around the lip of the Impala door, pressing his nose to the window as he stares out at the road. He can vaguely remember these two men that have him. He’s related to them, he thinks. The big one is familiar and makes him feel less out of place right now, though his size is a little too intimidating for Dean’s liking. The other one in the soft coat is familiar as well, but in a different way. He makes Dean feel safe. At peace. Dean has this overwhelming urge to cling to him and hug him at all times.

Like right now.

Dean turns away from the window and lurches forward without warning, wrapping his little arms around the one in the coat’s neck. He nuzzles his nose against the warm skin there, giggling when the scritchy scratchy stuff on the man’s chin tickles him.

Knowing they have names - and sensing them on the tip of his tongue - Dean pulls back and pouts. He boops Castiel on the nose and tilts his head in question. “Who you?”

“I’m Castiel. Do you remember me?”

“Cas!” Dean nods enthusiastically. Yes. He remembers Cas. Cas is silly. Cas makes him laugh. “Cas!”

Castiel smiles softly. “Yes, Dean. Cas. Good job.”

Dean turns to look at the big man, pointing a little finger. Before he can ask, Castiel says, “That’s Sam. Your brother. Do you remember Sam?”

“Sammy! Sammy!” He remembers Sammy too. His brother. Dean takes care of Sammy. Protects him. At least… he used to. Dean leans over and pats a chubby hand on Sam’s shoulder. “My Sammy.”

This makes Sam grin wide. He glances over at Dean before looking back at the road. “Yeah, Dean. Your Sammy.”

Pleased that this has been settled, Dean rearranges himself in Castiel’s lap and presses his nose back against the window. They’re pulling into a driveway now. It’s bumpy and he doesn’t like it. He whines to show his distress. Just seconds later, he’s being jostled and sent flying. He lands hard on his bum, right against Castiel’s knee. He hiccups, right on the verge of tears, but Castiel pulls him in for a big hug and cradles the back of his head.

“You’re okay, Dean. It’s just a few bumps. Then we’ll be home.”

“Home,” Dean repeats. Then he perks up. “Bunker!”

“Yeah, you’re right! The bunker. Good job.”

Dean smiles, very proud of himself. He holds tight to the collar of Castiel’s soft jacket as he’s carried out of the car and into their home. There are hazy memories coming to him as they walk through the bunker, but he can’t quite grasp any of them. It gives him a bad feeling in his tummy, but clinging tight to Castiel helps.

As long as Castiel stays nearby, Dean will be just fine.

If he tries to leave, though… they’re gonna have issues.

----

Dean won’t leave poor Castiel alone. Sam would find it funny if he didn’t find it so sad at the same time. It could just be Dean acting like a kid, but he doesn’t act that way with Sam. That makes Sam think it’s something more. He has a feeling that Dean’s deep-seated feelings toward Castiel, and his hidden fear that he’ll lose Castiel, are making their way to his tiny surface now that his defenses are lowered.

Just as Dean’s chicken nuggets are placed in front of him, as well as a make-shift sippy cup of juice, Castiel excuses himself for a phone call. Dean freezes mid-bite. Like, literally, chicken nugget in his mouth, teeth about to clamp down, mid-bite. Very slowly, he places it back on the plate and crinkles his eyebrows.

He puts a hand out toward Castiel, opening and closing it. “Uh?”

“He’ll be right back, Dean.”

“Cas!” Dean yells, ignoring Sam. “Cas, come back!”

“Dean, he’s talking on the phone. He’ll be right back.”

Shooting Sam a very - very - dirty look, Dean tilts his head back and yells, “Cas!”

Castiel comes jogging back into the room, eyebrows raised in alarm. When he sees that everything is fine, he looks at Sam in question. Sam shrugs. “He was not impressed with you leaving.”

“Oh.” Castiel turns back to Dean, seeing that the boy actually had some tears building in his eyes. “Dean, I would have been right back. I’m not leaving. I promise.”

“Cas stay!” Dean orders, pointing a finger at the chair Castiel had been sitting in a minute ago. Fighting a smile, Cas does as told.

Dean tentatively begins eating again. As he chews each bite, he stares Castiel down, daring the angel to move.

Thoroughly entertained by the toddler’s attitude, Castiel and Sam go back to reading the books they found on curses and hexes. The two of them keep exchanging looks throughout Dean’s meal, smirking in amusement.

----

It stops being entertaining after a few hours. Dean - who is still wearing nothing but his oversized flannel because he won’t let them change him into anything else - pads around barefoot, following Castiel everywhere he goes. If Castiel is standing still, he stands right beside him. He doesn’t even get bored. Most toddlers would find standing beside a grown up while they read a newspaper spread across the counter top boring, but not Dean. He stands patiently, staring at nothing. If there’s a distraction, like Sam talking to Dean or a sudden noise that startles him, Dean’s hand automatically goes to Castiel’s trench coat, clinging to him so he can’t run away while Dean’s not paying attention.

He follows Castiel to the library. To the kitchen. To the living room. To his bedroom. To the library. To his bedroom. To the living room. To the bathroom.

And so on and so on.

Every time they go on the move, Dean talks his ear off.

“Where we goin’, Cas?”

“Why?”

“But why?”

“Why, Cas?”

“Where we goin’ now, Cas?”

“Why?”

“What’s that smell, Cas?”

“What’s that?”

“Well, why it smells like that, Cas?”

“Why I no come in the potty with you, Cas?”

“What’s p-pa-paria-va- cy, Cas?”

“But... why, Cas?”

And so on and so on.

Finally, Sam comes back from the store with some toys. Castiel takes Dean by the tiny hand and leads him into the living room. They sit on the rug with Sam, the three of them sitting criss-cross together. Sam bought Dean some Mega-Blocks to play with. They decide to build a castle, which turns out to be Sam and Castiel building a castle, while Dean plays dragon and knocks it down every few minutes.

This is enough of a distraction that Castiel takes a chance, trying to slip away undetected to call Rowena back for more information on the hex placed on Dean. He makes it three steps - not even out of the living room - before Dean is scrambling to his feet, blocks flying in every direction as he goes running after Castiel.

“Cas, don’t leave!” he chirps, trying to catch up to him. “Cas, don’t leave!”

He gets a tight grip on Castiel’s trench coat and exhales in relief.

"He's quite the clingy little thing, isn't he?" Sam says with an amused smirk.

Yeah." Castiel rests a hand on Dean's little head and strokes his hair, smiling when it makes the boy relax. "Clingy but cute."

----

Castiel ends up sleeping with a miniature Dean in his bed that night, all curled up in his worn flannel, freckled nose twitching as he rests. He wakes up twice, both times because of a bad dream he had in which Castiel abandoned him. Castiel handles these nightmares by scooping Dean up and holding him close, promising the boy over and over that he isn’t going anywhere, that Dean is safe, and that everything is okay, until Dean falls back asleep.

The next day is more of the same. Dean has learned his lesson, and now knows it’s best if he stays in Castiel’s arms or on his lap as often as possible. This way, he doesn’t have to worry about chasing him around.

Castiel doesn’t fight it anymore. Sam takes over any communication with Rowena, handling everything himself while Castiel spends his day catering to a very bossy little Dean. Because now that Dean has figured out how to keep Castiel with him at all times, he’s moved on to his next level of needs: getting everything else he wants.

As much as Castiel loves Dean - big and small - and as much as he’s enjoying the cuddles and love he’s getting from the little guy, Castiel thinks if he never goes another day watching Scooby Doo, eating finger-foods, building the same exact castle repeatedly just to see it knocked down, getting a hot-wheel car driven along his body, and peeing with a tiny Dean right on the other side of the door, face pressed up against it as he asks every few seconds, “You still there, Cas?” it’ll be too soon.

That said, he’s pretty bummed when Rowena shows up with the cure. They put Dean on the kitchen table, where he sits right on the edge, stubby little bow-legs swinging anxiously. He keeps his tight hold on Castiel’s jacket, flinching every time someone touches him. It takes a lot of convincing and promising from Castiel that everything will be okay for Dean to cooperate with the spell.

Then, with just a few chanted words and a poof of smoke, a full-sized Dean is sitting on the kitchen table. The first thing adult-Dean does is look at Castiel with wide eyes and smile. The second thing is to grimace and say, “Son of a bitch,” as he realizes he’s naked from the waist down. He catapults off the table and rushes down the hall, yelling over his shoulder, “Grabbing some clothes. Thanks for the save, Rowena!”

When they ask Dean if he remembers the time he spent being little, he shrugs in typical Dean fashion and says a simple, “Yup. Thanks for dealing with me,” before changing the topic. For the rest of the night, they act normal. Other than the blocks still on the floor, there’s no evidence there was ever a toddler in the bunker at all.

----

Dean’s laying on his back in his bed, staring up at the ceiling as he replays the last two days. He startles when he hears a soft knock on his open door. When he looks over to find Castiel standing in the doorway, he sits up on the bed and gives him a smile.

“Hey, Cas.”

“Hello, Dean.” Castiel walks in before taking a seat beside Dean on the bed. Dean gets a momentary flash of the night before, when they had slept holding each other. It was so nice waking up from the nightmares to a warm, comforting Cas.

Dean’s going to miss Castiel. Sure, Castiel isn’t going anywhere, but the rules are different now. He’s an adult. The past two days with Castiel, clinging to him, feeling safe every time he looks up to find Castiel right there, every time Castiel gave him a hug or a kiss on the top of his head, that’s the happiest Dean’s been in a long time. That’s the part of Castiel Dean will miss, just like Dean’s going to miss the part of himself that was willing to ask for that love.

“Can’t fall asleep?” Castiel asks softly, placing a hand on Dean’s knee.

Staring at the hand on his leg, Dean admits, “I know it was only two days, but I sorta got used to being with y - someone. It’s lonely in here, I guess.”

“Mmm. Yes. I suppose it is.”

“I’ll get used to it.”

“You could. But you don’t have to.”

“What do you mean?”

Castiel smiles at him, but it’s tight. Hesitant. “I could stay the night in here. Keep you company.”

“No!” Dean practically shouts the word, too afraid to think of saying yes. Too afraid to consider what it would mean to have Castiel in the bed next to him. To admit that he needs the man on a subatomic level. To admit that his greatest fear isn’t dying bloody, it’s not even losing Sammy. His greatest fear is spending his life without Castiel by his side.

“I’ll leave you be, then, Dean. I’ll be in my room if you need me at all.”

Dean watches Castiel go, his trench coat billowing with each step. It’s just as Castiel reaches the threshold of the room that Dean realizes how stupid he’s being, how stupid he’s been, and gives into his natural instinct.

“Cas, don’t leave!”

Castiel turns slowly, giving Dean a smile. He closes the door and turns the lights off, using the glow of Dean’s dim lamp to get back to Dean’s bed. As he slips his shoes off, Dean reaches out to grab a fistful of his coat. He looks up at Castiel shyly, but says nothing. Castiel doesn’t say anything either. There’s no need. They both just know.

They’ve always known.

This has been a long time coming. They’re meant to spend their lives side by side. If it took a witch’s hex and some excessive block building to get there, then so be it.

They fall asleep easily that night, Castiel cradling Dean to his chest, and Dean keeping a tight grip on Castiel’s coat. At one point, Dean stirs in his sleep, the nightmare he’s experiencing making him whimper out a little, “Cas, don’t leave!”

Castiel holds Dean tighter and holds him through the dream, reminding him just like when he was a toddler, “I’m not going anywhere, Dean. I promise.”

57 notes · View notes

kendelias · 5 years ago

Note

#squad for your mystery gang!

#squad: who’s friends with who? what are the squad dynamics like?

OOOOH this one is so fun!! so at first it’s like…. shoving misshapen puzzle pieces together. but as they learn and grow, they become closer. as far as what i think is gonna be the first book, though, the squad dynamics are kind of like this:

winifred is closest with albert (her little brother), nova (her love interest), and theodora (her best friend). winifred brings nova into the group so there’s a pretty intense connection there (which starts off as reluctance, then friendship and then blossoms into more), and obviously she and albert have been through the Ringer together, and theodora… it’s literally just a soul sister connection. theo is kinda Nuts so like winnie is the only one who can really ground her and get her to see reason sometimes. she, juliet, and cassius like each other well enough (she kind of gives them this new place for friendship and she leads their little crew) and ryan is kind of like… winnie’s knight. like it’s such a profound respect there. and elton feels very neutral on winifred, maybe a tad bit of resentment, just like “oh hurrah, our fearless leader is here *eye roll*”

meanwhile, albert is closest to winifred (for obvious reasons), juliet (his love interest), and cassius (his best friend). he is the only person juliet can be really herself with (besides maybe cassius) and he helps her let her hair down… then of course they get into some illegal shit but like. it’s okay. and cassius… they start off Hating each other bc albert thinks cassius is some uptight prep who’s never worked for anything (he’s wrong cas is an angel) and cas thinks albert is a no-good punk (hey! he’s a very good punk!). but by the end of the series (idk about the book) they’re like some of the only people the other can stand. he and nova have a LOT of banter, and sometimes it’s good but sometimes it’s a bit too snarky. he and ryan are both just feral and kind of badass and they bond over their motorcycles, and i don’t think he and theo know what to do with each other. i think they’re like estranged cousins. and he hates elton so fucking much bc he may think cassius is an uptight bitch but he knows elton is an uptight bitch. elton, likewise, thinks albert is a brutish simpleton. their relationship remains kind of strained but they respect each other a little by the end.

juliet is closest to albert (her love interest), cassius (her twin), and elton (her nemesis/annoyance turned best friend). she and cassius are very protective of one another, and have the whole twin telepathy going on where they can just look at each other and know what the other is thinking). as for elton, she and elton despise each other at first bc she thinks he’s a creep and he thinks she’s manipulative (neither are true tbh), but they learn to realize they’re really not that different. she and nova kind of butt heads but not tremendously, and they spar back and forth over some of their choices, but i think there’s some respect there. she kind of ignores theo and ryan, which is fine, except that this causes some friction between her and theo, who already disliked her anyway. i’ll touch on that later!!

nova is closest to winifred (her love interest) and ryan (not really her best friend, more of the person she ideally aligns herself with and the one she best understands). ryan is a survivor of assault and nova gets that more than anything, so they get really close over the course of the series, and nova kind of backs her up on a lot of things. she and elton banter a lot and are often kind of mean to each other. she finds theo annoying ajksldfkjndjskldkf and cassius she really likes!! she just doesn’t tell him that, just assumes he knows. they’re like “why do you hate everyone” and she’s like “i don’t. i like ryan. cassius is cool.” and he’s like ???? :D bc he loves friendship.

cassius is closest to juliet (his twin), albert (his best friend), and elton (his love interest). elton and cassius have a very interesting relationship bc cassius is pretty much halfway in love with him at the beginning of the book but elton is too busy no-homo-ing to realize there could be anything else there. so cassius is really nice to him which throws elton off gaurd (bc juliet Hates him) but he eventually warms up bc… cassius is hard not to warm up to. i think they’re the most slow-burn of all the ships. cassius is pretty nice so there’s really no one he dislikes!! he’s friendly with all of them, which theo and ryan really appreciate bc they’re outcasts.

elton is closest to cassius (his love interest) and juliet (his best friend). elton and theo are both the most intellectual (academically anyway) and he’s usually the only one who can keep up with her. he and ryan are pretty neutral but i think there’s a solidarity of being bullied there.

theo is closest to winifred (her best friend) and ryan (her other best friend). theo comes up with crazy plans, ryan carries them out. they’re total enablers of chaos in the other’s presence, it’s wild. ryan is pretty stoic and strong but often gets pulled into theo’s crazy adventures for no reason other than she’s pretty persuasive. oh, and as for juliet, theo thinks of her as being spoiled and shallow. she grew up along side juliet, cassius, and their mutual friend ainsley, but she was kind of an emo who hated every second of it, and she blamed juliet and ainsley for being an outcast and not enjoying her childhood.

last, but not least, ryan is closest to theo (her best friend) and nova (her confidante???). again, ryan is pretty stoic, so she doesn’t allow herself to get close to a lot of people, but she likes these people so it’s okay.

send me a word from this list!!

#nicole #mystery #long post #friends: mystery squad #loveallthatjazz #what kind of woman doesnt have an ask

1 note · View note

ao3feed-destiel-02 · 11 months ago

Text

Pie Is Where The Heart Is

read it on AO3 at https://ift.tt/I5sz3dN by abstractsta Cas wants to do something special for his husband, so he bakes a pie. Cas is not a baker by no means, but he tries his best, and hopes it's good enough. Dean shows his appreciation in more than words. Dirty smut, to be honest. Words: 4098, Chapters: 1/1, Language: English Fandoms: Supernatural (TV 2005) Rating: Explicit Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Categories: M/M Characters: Castiel (Supernatural), Dean Winchester Relationships: Castiel/Dean Winchester Additional Tags: good morning, dirty smut, Married Sex, Anal Fingering, Butt Plugs, Come Eating, Come play, Anal Sex, Pie, Cas Bakes Dean a Pie, Castiel and Dean Winchester Have a Profound Bond, Enthusiastic Consent, Enthusiastic Dean Winchester, Top Castiel/Bottom Dean Winchester, Come Marking, Possessive Castiel (Supernatural), Fluff, Castiel and Dean Winchester in Love, Clothed Sex read it on AO3 at https://ift.tt/I5sz3dN

#IFTTT #ao3feed #fanfic #(your tags here)

0 notes

spnsmile · 5 years ago

Text

Happy?

Monday prompt: BET #SpnsStayatHome

@pray4jensen @bend-me-shape-me @helianthus21 @verobatto-angelxhunter

Castiel leaving Dean to babysit Jack for a few hours comes back to find Dean declaring something utterly ridiculous as—

“I’m going to make you happy!”

This after Jack casually praises Dean not only for being a very good hunter but also an expert hustler, baby driver, fisher, the best chef in the Bunker and just about everything Jack also wants to become (though not really a making of a very good role model), still made Dean feel so good about himself which was rare because in the Bunker— between him and his brother— these are all essential stuff they needed under their sleeves and he thinks Cas barely cares about trivial stuff so Dean appreciates the kid’s honesty because kids never lie.

Until the catch when the boy mentions something in lines of, “Except, you can’t make Cas happy,” making Dean’s eyebrows twitch.

“Excuse me? I can’t make Cas…happy? Did Cas tell you this? That I don’t make him happy?”

“No, but he doesn’t need to say anything. He is not happy, that’s—"

“Wait, you’re telling me I can’t make Cas happy?”

“I think you can’t do that.”

“Even if I’m hilarious?” it has gone very serious.

Actually, Jack means the deal with the Empty but Dean still ignorant of context naturally heard it differently. He heard it like a taunt a challenge on his ability. No one ever challenges Dean without the consequences for even doubting le Dean Winchester! Excuse his French, but he can do anything he put his mind into—and just like that when the angel finally returns from his errand as if summoned, Dean studies him very carefully wondering when the last time Cas’ smile muscles were ever used.

“Cas, you ever been happy?”

Castiel freezes like Dean just told him there’s no such thing as profound bond and continues to look like Dean just gutted him when Dean looks him square in the eyes.

“Happy. I am asking if you’ve ever been happy?”

Eyes widening with a frantic look that seems so out of place from a very simple question, Castiel dwindles. He glances at Jack’s direction searchingly before running the tip of his tongue on his chapped lips.

“Um… why?”

“Ah, shit.” Scraping sound of the chair on the floor as it gets pushed back, Dean stands up tall before the angel, dead flicker on his eyes.

“What—why?” Cas looks taken aback when Dean turns his heels and walks away. Exchanging a confused looked with Jack, the angel runs after him. “D-Dean, what?”

“You should have said something.”

“About what?” voice quivers a little but no one pauses to check as they drag the conversation to the corridor, possibly aiming for a door to shut on the angel’s face, but Cas doesn’t wait for that so he pulls Dean’s arm back.

“Dean—”

“You not being happy, alright?” annoyance not equal to the hunter’s troubled handsome face. Castiel quickly steps on Dean’s space in concern.

“I don’t understand. What’s my happiness got to do with you?” again with the quiver on the voice.

Dean rolls his eyes heavenward. “ I’m not supposed to ask if my best friend if he is happy?”

Castiel shakes his head, lost for words, nothing to describe his shock at the turn of events. Dean returns it with guilt realizing how the ocean blues eyes always there when he is in dire need, those blues he considers so precious to behold have never expressed real joy since it’s fall. Just always stormy anger and determination to fulfill tasks after tasks season per season beneath the blues of the sky.

But never joy. Well, one time with that burger… Dammit. But then…

An idea suddenly occurs to Dean.

“Cas, I’ve never been a good friend to you—”

“That’s not—“

“No, hear me out. I really suck, I know—”

“Dean—” reprimanding, not right to say.

“I always make you angry—”

“Um… okay…” a slow take.

“I always get on your bad side—”

“That is true.” Approving this time.

“I annoy you most of the time—”

Castiel just nods not even trying to stop him now.

Dean glares. “Of course, you realize what this means, do you?”

“Um…” Castiel squints, remembering the Bugs Bunny line Dean always repeats when they watch the loony tunes together, “…war?”

“I’m gonna make you happy,” Dean says with relished determination.

Then true apprehension sets in. The angel saw it in his eyes.

Castiel gulps. “Please, don’t.”

Can’t make Cas happy? You wanna bet?

Three days passed since then. The Bunker remained at peace, oblivious to the upcoming storm. Dean was busy in his room while Castiel can only wait in vain. He becomes apprehensive every time Dean walks into the kitchen or the library or in his general vicinity. Except Dean only smiles at him and do absolutely nothing.

It begins with a text.

Dean smiles to himself in the kitchen with Sam drinking his coffee, Jack opposite him when Castiel’s familiar light steps come bounding from the corridor.

“Dean…”

Sam turns to the angel from his laptop, “Hey, Cas—get this—”

“Dean, you sent me a good morning text.” Cas says urgently, following Dean to the stainless kitchen worktable like he’s afraid Dean would vanish from thin air. Dean who’s wearing a gray calico apron on top of his dark green shirt, sleeves pulled up to his elbows and a very charming look on his face when they stand opposite each other with the angel holding his phone like it’s the bible.

Dean leans both hands on the table, smirking. “So?”

“There’s an emoji text… with a heart.” Cas insists like it’s very important that they understand and make it clear. Sam stares up quietly from one to another. Dean only smirks and shrugs like he’s teasing the overly reacting angel from a trivial text.

“There’s more where that came from, you just wait this afternoon, Cas.” Winks the hunter like it’s allowed to look even prettier in the morning with his beautifully shaped lopsided smirk playfully turning up as the angel helplessly stares in his direction.

Castiel’s eyes widen.

Oh, but that’s just the beginning.

“Dean, why are you thinking about me?”

Cas’ says from the other line of the phone with voice deep and sounding uncomfortable to Dean who’s currently driving the impala after a successful hunt for the day. Cas was left to babysit Jack in the Bunker while Dean took care of the ghouls in Minnesota that took about half a day to hunt and another half a day to kill.

Out of the Bunker the entire day, he messages Cas and promptly receives a call from a very stricken angel.

“You said in your message ‘I’m thinking about you’…Do you have any specific reason why you are thinking about me?”

“Nothing really,” Dean hums in satisfaction, “I’m just thinking about you, that’s all.”

Castiel gasps. “T-that’s very nice of you, Dean… umm…I cannot think of why a person would think about another—”

“Why? Aren’t you thinking about me all the time too?”

There’s a sound of something crashing on the floor so it’s either Cas was reading a book or holding a laptop and Dean’s betting it’s the latter so he hopes its Sam’s laptop not his.

Dean smirks again and perhaps just forgot Sam is sitting beside him until his brother clears his throat again with a funny look on his face.

Dean ignores him.

That same week when Castiel and Jack return from grocery shopping, Dean is there waiting for them in the war room table with a beer can in one hand and book on the other. He looks up and warmly greets them ‘Welcome home,’ especially giving Castiel a very long, meaningful look, green eyes speaking volumes of sincerity so Castiel stammers a response. Dean meets him on the bottom of the stairs and without a word, twirls Cas by the shoulder and begins removing his coat—

“D-Dean!?”

“Yeah, it’s summer, what are you doing still wearing this? You’ll get hot. Well, you’re hot—” and no one asks if it’s the current body temperature but Castiel adamantly fights him.

“My vessel does not respond to the weather as with you humans—”

Dean takes it off anyway, grinning at another success. Before Castiel can say anything, Jack stands Dean’s side, shoulders hunching and waiting for his own jacket to be peeled. Dean takes it too with a smirk, then sees Sam watching from the table giving him the same funny expression he had from the kitchen.

“You wanna get your flannel taken off too?” Dean shoots over Sam as he puts the coats on his arms. Sam rolls his eyes but it all didn’t matter because even when Cas seems annoyed when they reached the kitchen, he was smiling at Dean the entire evening with less coat off his shoulder.

And it just goes on and on be it in the Bunker, the Impala, in the middle of the case while they are working as FBI agents, Dean will just light up like fire in the middle of nowhere.

“Hey, Cas.”

“What?”

“Who do you think is my speed dial number 1?”

“Um… I’m guessing it’s no longer Sam?”

Dean laughs out loud before knocking on their prospect’s door with an agent’s grim expression returning on his face in a flick of a finger.

One night when Dean strolls past Sam in the kitchen comes the awaited talk because Sam has been watching them and knows it’s no longer ordinary ‘thing’ he can ignore even when he wished he could because just the other night, Sam caught the two dancing on top of the war room table with dopey smiles on their faces, arms around each other with Dean saying something about having a dream of tap dancing and symbolic lamps—

“Dean, you realize you’re giving Cas the ‘boyfriend treatment’...”

Dean who’s jut taken a can of beer from his stash doesn’t break a sweat shrugging, “You’re still speed dial 1 on my second phone, alright?”

“I—I don’t care! What’s up with you and Cas? Are you guys…?”

Dean leans his hips on the table and shrugs.

“Does it matter if we label it?”

“What?”

“Uh… I don’t know what you wanna hear, Sam, but… did you see how Cas’s been smiling a lot these days? And I just thought… it’s not bad. These simple things I’m doing… not bad at all.”

“Yes, I know, Dean. And it’s good.” Sam puts on the ‘I’m-trying-to-not-butt-in-but-i-think-you-need–to-hear’ look when he clasps both hands. “But don’t you think you’ll be confusing Cas? He told me about this whole thing, about how you were only trying to prove Jack a point. But this is more than a bet, Dean… This is Cas’ happiness… what’ll happen if you suddenly stop?”

Dean suddenly stops just enough to give Sam a serious look like he’s thinking and overthinking stuff once again before his thoughts come into a halt and he lifts his green eyes at his brother bearing something like a revelation lights his face.

He smiles.

“You got it all wrong, Sammy.” Then he was just gone.

-------------------------------------------------------

“Are you happy?”

“Asking me this when you just shoved me on your door…” Castiel says, voice deep and husky inside Dean’s room, behind Dean’s closed door, with Dean upon him inches from his face, both hands

Castiel puts careful hands-on Dean’s chest, pushing him a little. Locking eyes with those beautiful orbs is enough for Castiel to forget why they were there in the first place.

“I think I maybe being selfish here, Cas but… I ….”

Castiel tilts his head.

“Why are you so fixated on making me happy, Dean?”

“Will this make you happy?”

“I prefer if you do not take this position.”

“What position?” Dean says, breathless, their hips dancing at the friction. Castiel takes Dean’s neck with rough hands and jerks him closer, foreheads bumping. In reality, Castiel is worried. Castiel knows Dean has been trying to make him happy for weeks now. With that kind of determination, it’s only natural Dean finally realizes what Castiel really wants.

“You don’t have to do all of this, Dean. Making me happy… this is too much…”

“You really want me to stop?” Dean says in a husky voice, his mouth already nipping on the angel’s chin sending shivers all over his body.

“I’m just saying you don’t have to do this to prove anything… Just stay by my side.”

“And if I really wanna do it?” the green eyes flash in arousal. Castiel eyes him searchingly, to see if Dean means it, if Dean is ready because Castiel has been waiting for a very long time. But he still fears it, fears the Empty that may just pull him out of nowhere.

“Are you scared, Cas?” Dean suddenly asks, pressing his lips on the angel’s cheeks, “Don’t look so scared… I’m gonna eat you, not leave you, ‘kay? I got you, Cas…”

Their lips crushed and it’s one thing for Dean to groan, another for Castiel to crush his lips on the man. When Dean lands flat on his back on the bed, Castiel as his top, he looks at the human—the man with the very soul he built from hell now ready to be taken apart again and all for him to take—

Dean who trusts him. Dean who loves him.

And Castiel realizes one thing that night when he wreaks havoc on Dean’s bed, while he breaks Dean apart and put him back again, it’s all too clear, realized why he was still in Dean’s arms the entire night, Dean resting on his chest.

Happiness is impossible to attain.

So, when Jack sits by his side munching on his sandwich months later with Castiel and Dean’s relationship out for the world to question yet bearing no real significance to their truth— comes the most important question.

“Cas, are you happy?”

“No, Jack,” Castiel says with eyes twinkling, watching Dean wrestle the Thanksgiving turkey in the oven. Dean whose wearing his apron again, against the blue shirt with solid determination to have the overlarge turkey inside his oven. Sam who’s there telling him how to do it. Dean growling, not listening just because.

“I’m not happy… I want to see more.”

Castiel just looks at Dean with pure hunger and longing and maybe yes, also lust. Such a human ‘thing’ he has acquired since living in this world for many years, first unable to grasp it until finally, it’s here, with him, a feeling also afflicting the angel. Of the real truth about happiness. That in a way, you cannot just say ‘enough’.

Not with what they have. Castiel smiles.

Oh, he is happy, but not too happy.

He will never get enough of Dean.

The end. Ao3 #stayathomechallenge

#SPNStayAtHome #destiel ficlet #cas x dean fluff #tooth rotting fluff #Destiel #DEANCAS #dean winchester #destiel domestics #domestics

183 notes · View notes

destielreclists · 7 years ago

Note

Hello again, I was wondering if you might know any fics where Cas is autistic, I read a truly beautiful series called Honey and Butter about that idea and it was so beautiful that now I really want more autistic!Cas. Thank you!!

Off the top of my head (that I’ve read) there’s:

Of Shampoo and Fruit Flies by: almaasi

Dean’s roommate is not what anyone would call ordinary. Cas is asexual, and autistic, and he frustrates other people with his unrelentingly ‘childish’ ways – but it’s different with Dean: they have an exceptional bond, something truly profound. Dean figures Cas wouldn’t respond to the idea of a crush the way most people would, so he has no intention of telling him he’s been harbouring non-platonic feelings for him for years. Then one night everything falls to pieces: Cas overhears something he wasn’t meant to hear. Things were never normal between the two of them, but now they might never be comfortable again.

Empty Spaces by: schmerzerling

Dean is fine. The way he sees it, things are simple. He had a house and a family and food in his stomach, and now he doesn’t. And yeah, that’s a downer, but he’s not going to let that stop him from being fine, because he’s in control of the situation. He definitely doesn’t need anyone to save him. And it’s not like the weird guy with the nice butt from down the road is the knight-in-shining-armor type, anyway.

Additional resources include:

On Destiel Rec Lists:

autism tag

On Destiel Fanfic:

autism tag

On Destiel Fic Recs:

mentally disabled Cas AU tag

On Archive of Our Own:

autistic Castiel tag (+ DeanCas as a relationship)

autistic Castiel tag (w/o any additional filters)

aspergers/autism spectrum Castiel tag (w/o additional filters)

aspergers/autism specturm Castiel tag (+ DeanCas as a relationship)

If you have any other recs to add, or resources to share regarding this topic, please drop them here.

#vango-romano #vangoromano #autism: au #au #mini #mod list #ask

3 notes · View notes

autisticandroids · 2 years ago

Text

like fantasy azazel says that to dean and like... the full quote from exile on main st. if anyone forgot is "the big daddy brought your pal cas back, so why not me? have a little spice with all that sugar" like cas is the sugar. but then when they actually see each other again they immediately butt heads, and for much less clear reasons that dean and sam do (cas wasn't letting dean think he was dead for the past year, for one thing).

personally, i think the most clear line that indicates why that's happening comes from you can't handle the truth: "what happened to you, cas? you used to be human, or at least like one." what this line is doing is primarily a complaint. it's a complaint to cas that he's different than he used to be but like... is he? the main thing dean has a problem with in season six is that cas has his own stuff going on and isn't there whenever dean needs him. but that was actually also kinda true (if slightly less) in season five and they also fought about it then. so why is dean acting like it's new?

well the answer is that he's been living with lisa for a year. he moved in with a stranger days after his brother died fully believing that cohabiting with a woman and child in the suburbs was all it took to make a person happy, and then it didn't work and he sat in that house in the suburbs with the woman and the child stewing in grief and guilt and resentment and misery. for a YEAR. with nothing but memories to keep him company. and the thing about nostalgia is it has a way of filing the rough edges off things. so the cas he thought about? the one he hallucinated azazel calling his "sugar"? that cas was his perfect little angel.

but then the real cas comes back and he's not dean's fantasy, and dean's free of lisa but he's still miserable for some reason and part of that is that cas is a complex person with needs and feelings and other things to do instead of dean's precious teddy bear but it's also that everything is like that. in his misery with lisa dean constructed in his mind a version of his old life just as rosy and false as the white picket fence fantasy lisa was meant to fulfill. and so dean is crumbling. and he lashes out.

and then of course for cas' part he isn't imagining dean. he's imagining their relationship. he's watching over dean, and saying to himself i'm doing this for you, and he's building up this relationship with dean in his mind.

and it's unreciprocated! of course it's unreciprocated. intellectually he knows that. he knows dean doesn't even know he's there, has no idea of the year of bloody turmoil cas has put himself through, has no idea that so much of it has been for dean's sake.

but when you spend a year of your life pondering your past relationship with a man, imagining its continuation, fantasizing about where it could lead, especially if you spend that year sitting in his kitchen watching him make dinner... well your lizard brain, your intuition, your emotional mindset, those can get a little confused. you can feel like you have more of a relationship built with him than you actually do. when you think of him you think of the relationship it feels like you have. the current deep friendship, affection, love you've built. and some part of you expects him to reciprocate, even if you've only built that relationship in your mind. "dean and i have a more profound bond" indeed.

the thing about season six is the tragedy of season six destiel is kind of a tragedy of romanticizing the past

#spn

100 notes · View notes

bowlegsandbiceps · 4 years ago

Photo

Summary:

Castiel’s father is dying.

That’s just how it is in Lebanon.

Coming 7/20

Excerpt Below the Cut:

“You seem fine to me.”

“This is a family event Dean. Language.” Sam oofed as Dean socked him in the stomach, making Castiel jump.

Dean turned to him as if nothing had happened. “At least gimme some electrolytes or something.”

“Dude…” Sam grabbed Dean’s arm making him pause to take a breath. He wiped his mouth with the back of his arm before sucking in a deep breath.

“This is my annoying kid brother.” Dean belched before going in to finish the bottle and Sam looked absolutely appalled, though Castiel surprised himself by laughing.

Great. I have a crush on my mechanic.

“Sam,” Sam extended his hand and Castiel reached out to take it. “Sorry, I didn’t get your name.”

“Castiel Novak. Dean’s my mechanic.” Castiel said at the same time Dean replied. “This is Cas. I’m fixing his car.” The men blinked at each other before Dean broke into a rougish grin.

Dean offered his hand which Castiel took, face still stoic and Sam turned away to rub a hand over his face. Castiel thought he heard him mutter, “Sweet Jesus.”

#destiel #fanfiction #supernatural #deancas #spn fic

0 notes

spnsmile · 4 years ago

Text

In the Bunker

Monday: Undercover written for #spnSTAYatHOme challenge ♡

@helianthus21 @pray4jensen @bend-me-shape-me thanks!

When it becomes apparent the Winchesters cannot win against the all-powerful, and that the they require more help from all Supernatural beings in order to defeat god, Castiel takes initiative to reach all forces, especially Heaven.

Taking the opportunity after giving Jack respite out of the Bunker to stay with Kaia and Claire, Castiel fully focuses on getting the side of the angels. He didn’t expect it to be easy.

The angels do not want to have anything to do with the Winchesters, not by their ‘chinny-chin-chin’ as Dean once quoted for not opening Heaven’s door when their need was dire. But it’s not the chins the angels are most concerned about. There are some who think the written prophecy will still take place and as angels, they still adhere to ‘not interfering’ much to Castiel’s chagrin.

Not wanting to contradict them further, Castiel doesn’t stop trying to convince them that there is no reason to be wary of the Winchesters (as long as the intention is not to harm or Castiel will be in their way) for they will play a key role in fixing everything. And by fixing, he explains patiently it is not the destruction of god, but of something only the Winchesters are capable of doing— a miracle.

Eyes and eyebrows turn and arches, but Castiel knows he’s able to sway some of them at his display of faith. If there’s anyone right at the top in faith, it would be them. His name is Sabrael, an angel of miracles.

“I do not wholly believe that the Winchesters are redeemable—” begins the golden-haired seraphim once he and Castiel jump out of the portal in the sandbox and head for Castiel’s car, “But I do believe their knack of pulling out miracles one after another is something to behold and I wish to understand why your faith is still with them after all these times given that they are the infamous brothers who brought forth the destruction of all realms. For that purpose, I will be amenable to let you show me why this is so and act as heaven’s representative to gather information from your charge.”

Castiel shrugs, unable to find any words to counter.

“So, you’re going undercover?”

Sabrael glances at him and squints, “Am I required to go under the Winchesters’ cover?”

Castiel blinks.

“Um… I am not sure what you mean by that but if it means protection, then yes.”

“I do not need their protection,” Sabrael says in all seriousness as they get in Castiel’s car. “I am capable of that; I have my angel blade.”

“It won’t be enough protection but, Sam and Dean are nice people and will readily be there for you whether you ask it or not…” Castiel smiles more to himself, thinking of the Winchesters’ selfless acts they never boast about.

“That’s how they… um… roll. They don’t ask, they just do. And most of the things they do are genuine to help others. They will help you out, they thrive in helping. They are very kind… well, mostly, Sam. Dean can be a little complicated with angels…”

“And he is your charge?” the tone is testing the waters.

“He is, but he is a very unequivocal man and very… very Dean. You have to have a profound relationship with him to understand him…”

“I understand you bonded with him in hell? That’s where it all began—”

Castiel stops only to turn a very solemn expression to his brother.

“One thing in this mission, Sabrael. Do not intentionally say anything untoward about brothers. You can say anything you want about me, about I am one of the Fallen, about my failures, but… don’t ever insult Sam and Dean in my presence…”

His eyes are intent on Sabrael.

“They already have the world on their shoulders to receive unjust ridicule from our kind— it will be distasteful if we are ungrateful.”

“I am not grateful.” At Castiel’s livid face, Sabrael adds cautiously, “But as I have told you, I will be amenable. No matter how complicated you deem him to be… I will try my best to study him, keeping in mind he is still a special vessel meant for our brother.”

Castiel glares before revving the car.

It’s easy to make Sabrael understand for angels are obedient by nature. He explains about the Bunker where few angels are able to find, the hunting system and how some of the room works as the library, the kitchen, and the bedrooms, and to other places, a visitor will not be allowed entrance.

“I understand. It seems there are plenty of restrictions in this Bunker.” Sabrael says thoughtfully, “Is Dean Winchester’s cave so holy to put so many sigils of protection? Why are angels not allowed there if it is such a sanctuary?”

“Because it’s just is,” Castiel says distractedly, “… and it’s not holy.” He doesn’t explain further even when Sabrael keeps throwing him confused glances. “Anyways, just let me tell Dean why we’re doing this… he’ll understand… and please, don’t tell him directly you are an undercover agent from heaven. I’ll come up with a good explanation, trust me, they’ll never think of you as a threat...we’ll just tell him you’ll… observe the field.”

“You think he will not realize I’m there to spy?”

“You’re not a spy.”

Because it’s really not like that.

“So, he’s a spy?” Dean says lazily from the library table with cheek propped up on his knuckle. Castiel sighs in resignation. Beside him, Sabrael elbows him and says very clearly—

“You really don’t get this huh?”

After a round-about story of how he invites the angel to see for himself how the is getting along with Sam and Dean—where Dean butts in about spying, Castiel informs the Winchester that Sabrael will be staying with them for as long as necessary and that if they could extend their hospitality to his brother as the Winchesters once did for him.

Sam smiles genuinely, “Of course, Cas… your family is our family.”

Dean ogles at Sam weirdly before he snorts, shaking his head.

“Fine, make yourself at home.”

Saying so, Sabrael walks to the table, to the chair adjacent to the hunter and takes his seat, leaning on the table too for good measure and he stares at Dean from pore to pore, making the hunter throw an incredulous look at his angel.

“What are you doing?” Dean asks, leaning a little away before he gets cross-eyed.

“I’m studying you.”

Dean glares at Castiel with one of his screaming expression of— ‘ great-Cas-just-great’ look while Sam chuckles—earning him another exasperated glare as well. “Fine, whatever.”

“You trust me easily,” Sabrael tells Dean quietly.

“I trust Cas,” Dean says simply, still glaring and flipping his book at the same time, “just make sure you don’t start shedding salty feathers around, we’ll be fine.”

“My feathers are not salty,” Sabrael says, indignantly.

“How d’you know? Wait, you actually lick it for grooming, eh? Do you spit feather-hairballs ?” Dean grins at the scowl he receives.

Ten minutes later, Sabrael declared Dean Winchester to be rude and without consideration whatsoever. Castiel grimaces.

“Honestly, Castiel how can you endure an arrogant man who knows no bounds in insulting heavenly beings?”

“I just…stopped caring about the things he says,” Castiel shrugs.

“That is not very healthy. I find Sam Winchester more agreeable—and he is supposedly the vessel of the real devil while Dean Winchester is Michael’s—”

“I know, I have been in the exact train of thought.” Castiel says sympathetically, “But I wouldn’t… stress on it… Dean can be very… disagreeable at the beginning but once you warm up to him, you’ll see… he is a very caring guy.”

*** ♡***

“Still here?” Dean says flatly when he comes to the kitchen the next morning and automatically road blocked by the new angel in the Bunker. Castiel couldn’t be more embarrassed remembering how he used to startle Dean in the same manner.

“I did say I will study you,” Sabrael says stubbornly.

“You can study my ass,” Dean tells Sabrael who blinks and lets his eyes travel down to Dean’s thighs and his behind, making Dean give Castiel a painful grimace.

Sam laughs. Castiel hung his head guiltily.

Days get busy in the Bunker and Sabrael is allowed to tag along. His angel brother doesn’t make it easy with side comments of how still ‘wasteful and bloody’ the Winchesters deal with some hunts that can be done without much bloodshed or getting thrown around to how Dean’s car is rickety and noisy, there’s no doubt in Castiel’s mind that Sabrael just made it to Dean’s top ‘Angel Douche’ of the year.

“Sammy, get me some angel proof spell!” The request was immediately denied when another day panned out with Castiel’s brother is found inside Dean’s room.

“Why don’t you angel proof it yourself?” Sam asks.

“What—you want Cas to face slapping the wall? Not that we’re not doing that already.”

“Ew! Dean! Don’t be gross over my salad!”

But Dean smiles sunnily and looks across at the angel by the entrance of the kitchen who comes back after a long talk with Sabrael. He tells him he cannot sneak inside Dean’s room no matter how much he wants to understand why Castiel is so enamored by the hunter—or why only Castiel is allowed entry.

It’s impossible to understand.

“Found out why he’s sticking in my ass?” Dean asks once the two of them are side by side and washing the dishes—Dean washing, Castiel wiping them dry.

“He wants to study our bond.”

“Why? He wants to bond with someone?”

“I’m not sure, but Sabrael is known for his persistence in his garrison.”

“Are you kid- someone else is more persistent than you are?” Castiel glares back as Dean smiles cheekily again but there’s a comfortable atmosphere that falls between them where Castiel is sure Sabrael is able to study.

Sabrael doesn’t care for space like the other angels before him.

To Dean’s credit, he barely flinched at the space taken but the occasional curses and grinding of teeth do get Castiel’s attention from time to time. It’s not much about Dean’s irritation and Castiel’s worry that he might explode—Dean will if he wants to and nothing can stop him—but every time he thinks Dean is about to erupt from what Sabrael said, (“This Dean-Cave is no Holy den nor is it any sacred as any cave, but just another dingy ditch”) Dean calms down.

Just one look at Castiel and Dean calms down. Two weeks passed and the routine gets old. Sabrael still cannot find it in him to see any delightful features on Dean Winchester who doesn’t bother trying to win Mr. Congeniality.

To be fair, Sabrael does not have a winning personality either.

“You know what for a spy—you’re not very spy-ish.” He tells the angel who walks pass him quietly.

“I don’t do ish, what is ish?” Sabrael wants to know.

Dean glares at Castiel so hard the angel of the Lord ends up rubbing the back of his neck nervously.

“I’m sorry about this,” he tells Dean one night when he stands at the foot of his friend’s bed with Dean busy folding his flannel and shirt.

“Can you smite him?” Dean asks without looking up.

“Dean,” Castiel admonishes lightly.

“Too bad, I was just thinking he’s growing fond of me,” Dean is very meticulous when it comes to the folding—much more than Sam. Castiel can attest how much Dean has been trained for it—he remembers Dean telling him how he has to take care of their laundry as children and about how he never wants Sam’s clothes wrinkled no matter how many fucking schools they transfer. He always wants Sam to look well-taken care because it’s what his genius brother deserves.

Castiel loves him for that.

“Here, let me—” he steps toward the bed but Dean presses two fingers on his forehead, much like how Castiel does when he could teleport them with his powers before. Castiel’s face falls. Dean smiles.

“I don’t want your brother hearing how I make you scream you know? Don’t want to add it to his long list of ‘Why I hate Dean Winchester’.”

“He doesn’t hate you.”

“Yeah? Do you know how he lectured me for eating beef while you took your sweet time taking care of the case with Sam in Maine? Or how he says pies tastes like ‘dung’. Son of a—does he only exist to insult my life?

“I’m sorry, Dean,”

“It’s not you, Cas, but how does he know? Your angel brothers make it a habit to taste shit cow pies? Ever had that in your life, Cas?”

“I’m just going to fold your shirt, what does it have to do with him?” Castiel frowns but he doesn’t push it.

But Dean’s eyes gleam darkly.

“Sure, my angel near my bed, inside my room, folding my shirts,” Dean gives him a playful smirk, “Kinda hot in my vocabulary but nah… I want your brother to play the gossip… about how we expanded the staring contest to something…sexy… But with a dude like that? I don’t think he’s the type to run back with tail between his legs once he finds out. He’ll be a buzzing fucking bee in my ear.”

Castiel leaves the room more disappointed than he expected. But all the same, he has to talk to Sabrael.

“Cas, what the hell?”

Sabrael’s face crumples in so much contempt, Castiel has to put a hand on his brother’s soldier to appease him and explain for full thirty minutes how it is not as offensive as it sounds.

It’s at this that he receives an equally critical look from his brother.

“You are letting them treat you this way? You—the angel of the Lord, warrior, and Commander—”

“Yes.” Castiel says without qualms, “Because we are family.”

“I have watched families over and over in this world and yes… this may be what they call a little dysfunctional. But for you to allow it…”

“I won’t ask you to submit to it but, if it makes you feel better—I call Dean stupid all the time.”

Sabrael takes the cue from that so the next day when he is about inches from Dean’s face again, he says, “So, you are stupid.”

Castiel drops the book he is reading from the library as he hears the conversation. He can tell Dean and Sabrael are in the kitchen—clashing early that morning so he hurries towards them.

“Don’t,” Dean growls with eyes of steel intent on his target, “that’s a pet name we have so don’t go throwing it around careless.”

Sabrael flairs in anger.

“You think Castiel is your pet!?”

“N-no, that’s not what—I like Cas okay? He belongs with me,”

“You are establishing ownership like he is no more than your pet.”

“ Dammit, stop twisting my words! I don’t care how you interpret that, he’s mine! Cas belongs to me!”

“You’re right, I do not belong here,” there’s bitterness lacing Sabrael’s words. Castiel stops at the threshold, listening in, hoping his brother and Dean don’t end up any more quarrelsome than they already are.

There’s a beat. He hears Dean grumble under his breath.

“Of course, you do,” Dean says, “you’re an angel-like Cas, angels belong in my world. I don’t want to exist where you don’t so you belong right here in this space, okay? Angels belong to me so by extension—you belong in my world too, you little childish spy.”

Castiel smiles as he leaves the wall and walks quietly to the corridor. He realizes it will start from here on, of how Sabrael will see how special Dean Winchester really is. He doesn’t see the way Sabrael’s eyes light at Dean’s words, doesn’t see the abrupt change of his expression, and the slight blushing of his usually pale cheeks.

All he knows is that his brother has glimpsed the burning soul of the man he vows to protect and love.

Oh, his word.

“C-CASSSS!” Dean shouts at the top of his lungs—and it’s not the ‘serious-facing-instant-death’ kind, in fact, it sounds like one of Dean’s cries whenever he sees a cat or anything ridiculous for the angel’s eyes—and yet that Dean is screaming from the comfort of his room is wrong. Castiel nearly destroys the door of Dean’s room when he crashes it open—

That’s where he finds Dean Winchester with back plastered on the headboard of the bed and Sabrael under Dean’s covers with only his head seen from beneath.

Sam comes in to check and when he sees everything, he leaves the corridor and forsaken his brother to the two angels while Castiel marches in with a dark expression and, from Dean’s description later, ‘ goes in and kick an angel’s butt’.

Castiel doesn’t need any long discussion with Sabrael. The angel has learned of the magic of Dean Winchester and that’s enough. Sabrael doesn’t need to say it, Castiel can see it the way his brother’s eyes light up when he sees Dean. Castiel actually likes the change, of the angels loving his charge… as long as they do not step on the line.

But it is time to say goodbye.

“You are not bad, Dean Winchester. And I wish to be under the same covers as you again for you are warm… warmer than this vessel.”

Dean blushes whereas Castiel throws him a glowering look. To Sabrael, he raises one heavenly dominant eyebrow that strikes friends or foe.

“I think your undercover game has is over,”

Sabrael stares back, somewhat crestfallen.

“But I want—”

Castiel grimaces and shakes his head. “No.”

Not going to happen.

To Castiel’s annoyance, Sabrael exchanges a pleading look with Dean. The hunter blinks several times and Castiel can just see Dean’s defenses at being attacked in his own bed because Dean is kind like that, always forgiving, always with the generous heart even when he is wronged.

“No,” he repeats when Dean opens his mouth and they gaze at each other. With brief excuses and apologies, Sabrael wraps his business with the Winchesters and Castiel escorts him back to the sandbox in silence.

But when they reach heaven’s door, Sabrael turns to Castiel with a small smile.

“I now understand, brother. Why you choose to be with him,”

Digging his hands deep inside his trench coat pockets, Castiel nods without needing to clarify and Sabrael returns back to heaven with a final longing expression in his face.

Castiel never wants to have the same expression of regret. Returning to the Bunker late that night, he knocks at Dean’s door, opens it to see Dean reading a book quietly on his bed under the night lamp, covers drape his middle and ambiance so familiar and comely that makes Castiel want to wrap himself in Dean’s warm space because Sabrael is right in all aspects of Dean.

“You’re never the jealous type, Cas,” Dean says as Castiel sheds his coat and crawls on the bed towards him, Dean pulling his necktie to get him close enough for a soft kiss.

“Not really. I have my own type.”

“The type that pulls other angels from my lap?”

“Yes, this lap is mine,” saying so he pulls the covers from Dean and straddles his lap. They smile and kiss, Castiel wrapping his arms around the hunter’s neck while Dean runs his palms on Castiel’s side. When they pull from the long, lips-chasing-catching-kiss., Dean narrows his eyes at him.

“What’s this about being under my covers? You talk to the angels about our business?”

“The family business?”

“No, our dirty bedroom business.”

“Your bedroom is never dirty,” Castiel lets Dean unbutton his shirt, letting the loose tie hang around his collar still, “You have the neatest room I have visited in my long existence,”

Dean frowns, “Exactly how many bedrooms have you visited… and do you—you know—do the same—"

“Do not be stupid, you’re the only man I engaged with.”

Dean kisses his neck as the dress falls down his shoulders. They remove all the extra layers until they are both warm skin to skin. Dean loves suckling his earlobes, making Castiel’s breath hitch a little.

“And women?” Dean whispers. Castiel clutches on his shoulder for support. Dean’s mouth on his skin sends fiery flames all over his vessel.

“My body… has been rebuilt many times— it doesn’t count.”

“Oh, so every time you return… ah…” Dean’s eyes dance in mischief, “that’s why you’re always so tight.”

Castiel pecks on Dean’s pink cheek, engrossed by the way Dean is smiling so happily. He can’t help himself. He kisses Dean. The hunter pushes him down the bed and stays on top of him, smiling from ear to ear and Castiel believes he does belong with Dean. That there is no universe he can be without a Dean.

“Loosen me.” He says.

Dean laughs as he throws the covers over their heated, tangled bodies.

“As you wish.”

♡ ♡ ♡

@verobatto-angelxhunter i liveeeeeeeee xD late again -.-’’’’’

♡ LINK AO3

#SPNStayAtHome #destiel crack #destiel ficlet #nasty angel #so in love dean and castiel #casdean #domestic fluff #Jealousy #kissing an angel

58 notes · View notes