#problems with the movie aside i am not immune to whatever was wrong with him!!!

[starleska]

yeah sure, i'll speak my truth. i really like King Magnifico 🙈💖

[petri808]

O5+Itafushi sick/injured/comfort for Anon 😊 totally canon divergent since we still don’t know a lot about their backgrounds and the series is still on going 🙃 Hurt/Comfort, angst w/happy ending. *Does container manga spoiler aspects if you’re not up to date on it.

It couldn’t be helped... logically, Megumi knew this, but what his brain understood didn’t mean his heart could accept. Yuuji was fated from the beginning to die and he knew— Knew that all the man wanted was to die without regret, and saving their world... well how much more honor could one achieve by fulfilling his grandfather’s dying wish? He should be happy for his friend, content in the knowledge that Yuuji gave them a chance to rebuild a better world without the fear of Ryomen Sukuna ever destroying it. Should be... but he wasn’t.

How many times had Megumi convinced himself they weren’t heroe’s, they were just sorcerers. Spiritual police in a sense, there to protect without a desire for acknowledgement. And that their deaths were both inevitable and not immune to regret. All they could do was their best not to garner too much of it and become the very curses they swore to fight. It was why most jujutsu sorcerers learned from an early age not to care about humanity, or at least lie to themselves that it was a possibility. Such bullshit, really.

So, as he stood there staring down at what remained of his best friend’s body, Megumi couldn’t help the regret bubbling up in his very soul. This was literally and figuratively his fault. Yuuji’s, or rather Sukuna’s exorcism was a combined effort in which he’d participated in. That’s not something you can simply set aside. Yes! Megumi was glad that Sukuna was gone, but so was Yuuji! He didn’t care if his friend had been born into, or chosen to, or somehow been trapped in this fate. It wasn’t fair at all. None of this was fair to any of them, just as his own birth had been an unfortunate creation for revenge.

“Fuck!” Megumi gritted out a barely audible utterance as his nails dug into the clenched fists at his sides, and tears trickled down his face. This wasn’t fair at all!

He shouldn’t even be there. If Gojou sensei knew he’d snuck into the morgue he’d be in trouble. But he didn’t care! They didn’t even let him say goodbye to his friend before carting him off to Dr. Shoko. It was for his own good— pfft, fucking uncaring bastards! Yuuji was the first real person he’d ever connected with who gave him back a sense of the humanity he’d lost along the way. The man made him feel, and now. “Fuck...” Megumi knew he was screwed. His heart had crossed the line. Images of a smiling Yuuji play like a movie behind his closed eyes, bringing a pained smile curling on Megumi’s lips. He’d avoided admitting it to himself, but it was true. He’d fallen for Yuuji Itadori.

It had been an unspoken promise Megumi made to Yuuji, one he’d made deep within his heart the moment it had chosen to cross the line. He’d find a way to sever Sukuna from Yuuji and save his love from the ultimate sacrifice. This promise had never been proclaimed from his own lips, but there was no running from the covenant he’d created in his soul. As Sukuna once explained, certain pacts in their works simply could not be broken.

His knees weakened, crumpling Megumi to the floor in a position of summary execution. All of the emotional walls he’d learned to control, gave way in a flood, sending shadowed curse energy to blanket the room. He didn’t even try to stem the flow of power surging out from his pain. It was entirely selfish to lash out with his regret and anger, but Megumi couldn’t stop... didn’t want to let go. “It’s not fair!” He raged into the still darkness. “I should have saved you! If I was stronger, I could have saved you! But I’m too weak... even now, I can’t...” he hung his head head and closed his eyes, “I can’t even let you die properly because you deserve to live Yuuji...” Because I still need you... Damn the consequences, he’ll take whatever comes his way! “Yuuji!!!”

.....Megumi wasn’t exactly sure what happened, how he ended up passed out on his side, or even how long he was laying there. But something gentle brushed against his face, sweeping his hair aside, and caressing it to stir him awake. His body was groggy from the power drain, eyes barely able to focus in the amber emergency lighting. Whatever it was said nothing, just continued soothing him and coaxing with light prodding to wake up. It felt so nice... Wait! Fuck! Was he caught?! Was it Gojou, Dr. Shoko, someone else?!

His eyes flash open wide as he scrambled to sit up, ready to explain himself, but— “Sukuna?!” Megumi screamed in shock.

“What?!” The naked man stumbled back, looking around in a panic. “Where?! He’s supposed to be dead!”

Megumi adjusted his eyes better, because the form in front of him looked like Yuuji, but with all of the same markings as Sukuna, including the second set of open eyes. Although the voice was different... not exactly Yuuji’s, not Sukuna’s, maybe a mix of both. “Who are you?” He asked, noting that the curse energy flowing from this thing was akin to Sukuna in power and this could be a trick from the God of Curses. Is this what his regret had wrought?!

“It’s me,” the figure stepped forward in confusion, a hand over his chest. “Yuuji. Megumi how could you not know it’s me?”

“Because you look like and feel like Sukuna.”

Yuuji looked down at his body and could see the markings too. But that’s when he also noticed something else in the room. His dead body lying on the operating table. His eyes widen as they whip back to Megumi. “Am I?!” His shaky voice cracked.

It was becoming clear. Megumi nodded. “My regret brought you back as a...”

“Curse...” Yuuji breathed out. He was stunned, and yet somehow not surprised. “Wow... but I don’t look like a normal curse.” He could think and feel, “I’m like Mt. Fuji head?”

“I don’t understand it either. I’m so sorry Yuuji— I just couldn’t let you go.” The tears formed again in Megumi’s eyes. “I’d sworn to myself I’d save you, but I failed miserably and for that... n-now you’re a curse.”

“I should be mad at you.” Yuuji knelt down in front of his friend, smiling. “But I’m not. I know all too well how hard it is to let go of people we care about.”

Megumi shook his head. “You don’t understand. I’m being selfish and that’s wrong! I just... I-I just... I love you too much to let you go.”

“You... love me? Like a friend, friend love or...”

Megumi turned away and if it wasn’t so dark his blushing cheeks would be glaringly obvious. “No, the other kind.”

“Brotherly love?”

For a second there, Megumi had to question his own sanity again for failing in love with an idiot. He ran his hand down his face in a huff. “The I wanna kiss you kind! I know you said you like women with big butts and all, but yeah,” he mumbled, “that’s how I feel about you idiot.” His face was truly on fire by this point, only made more difficult by the fact the man he loved was hanging out for all to see.

“Oh!” Yuuji chuckled and sandwiched Megumi’s face between the palms of his hands. “I’m just messing with you. I knew that for a while now.”

“Wait how?!” But dang if seeing Yuuji’s smile again didn’t just melt him. “I kept it hidden.”

“You did, but Sukuna sensed it in you when your domains overlapped, and he showed me.”

Yuuji leaned forward and brought their lips together in an awkward kiss. It was brief, but for Megumi, it solidified how he felt. That yes, he really did love this man and finally! He got to kiss him!

“There was a time I thought Sukuna had a crush on you actually,” Yuuji chuckled. “But then of course, it turned out he just wanted to use you.”

“So... you’re okay with me liking you?” As he spoke, Megumi pulled his coat off and handed it to Yuuji to cover up.

“Why wouldn’t I be?” Yuuji smiled and put on the coat. “But what do we do now? Technically I’m not alive, I’m a walking, talking curse.”

“Fuck,” Megumi sighed, his shoulders slumping, “I didn’t exactly think this through, just lost control.”

Yuuji placed a hand on his shoulder, “hey, we’ll figure it out. We always do.”

Megumi couldn’t hold back any longer. He pulled Yuuji into a tight bear hug as renewed tears pooled in his eyes. “I don’t care what you are, I’m just happy to have you back.”

Yuuji returned the hug. “Me too.”

Suddenly, clapping echoed through the darkened room seconds before the light switch was flipped on, causing Megumi to flinch. Shit! They were caught so quickly!

“I had a feeling this would happen.”

It was Gojou’s voice. Aww crap!

Megumi moved Yuuji and placed himself between the two men. “Leave him alone!”

“Oh, don’t worry your pretty little head Megumi Chan, I’m not gonna exorcise him. I followed you here, so if I’d wanted to stop you, I would have done so sooner.”

“You’re messing with me.” Megumi narrowed his eyes in suspicion. “It’s our job to dispatch curses. Why would you make an exception.”

“Yes, under the old ways, but as you know, those ways were destroyed by us. As long as a curse is not a problem, I don’t care if they exist.” Gojou cocked his head in an evil grin. “Yuuji is now for you, as what Rika is for Okkotsu. I didn’t exorcise Rika, did I?”

“No...”

“Exactly!” He clapped his hands together. “Having powerful special grades on our side is a benefit in my eyes,” Gojou moved his mask to reveal his own, “and these eyes know everything,” he winks before affixing the mask. “Besides, who am I to get in the way of love,” he shrugged.

Megumi rolled his eyes at that last jab, but Yuuji let out a sigh of relief. “Gojou sensei, do you know why I’m like this?” He motioned to his body. “Shouldn’t I be more like Rika? But I can think for myself and talk, and I feel... well, normal.”

“That’s a good question!” Gojou cackled and pointed at Yuuji. “I have no idea!”

“Ugh!” Megumi slaps his forehead. This man never changed.

“But,” Gojou grew serious in an instant, “I can guess there are three factors involved.” He held up one finger, “Number one! You, Yuuji are no ordinary human but created by a curse at birth.” Raising a second finger, “Number two! You and Sukuna were bonded at the instance of death, so you’ve fused with him.” Adding a third finger, “and lastly, number three! When one special grade sorcerer curses another former special grade sorcerer, that amount of curse energy wasn’t going to create a lower lever spirit. So, voila! You were made Yuuji!”

“But is it like I still have control of Sukuna or something?”

“I don’t know, you tell me. Do you still sense him?”

Yuuji paused in thought before shaking his head no.

“It’s likely Sukuna’s soul was fully exorcised, and since Megumi was only thinking of you, it was only you that was brought back. This is just the form your cursed energy has taken. We’ll need to test what powers you’ve retained, but from what I’m sensing, they are on par with Sukuna’s residual energy.”

It’s Megumi who speaks up next. “So, is Yuuji allowed back at school?”

“I’ll allow it, provided your classmates don’t mind. Remember, while you can see him, he’s no longer alive, so normal humans won’t see him anymore. He is just a cursed spirit.”

Megumi and Yuuji looked at each other, then back to their teacher with Yuuji taking hold of Megumi’s hand. “I think they’d get mad if we didn’t return,” Yuuji smiled.

Gojou tipped two fingers as he turned to leave, “then I shall see you in class tomorrow. Try to keep the noise down in your room.” He teased with a cackle.

Megumi flushed red. “He’s so irritating.”

“Yeah, but you gotta admit Gojou sensei’s one of the cool ones.”

“Yeah,” Megumi sighed, but smiled. “Guess we should head back to school too.”

Yuuji squeezed his new boyfriend’s hand and nodded. “I can’t wait to see everyone’s faces when I walk in!”

“Just, no practical jokes like phasing through walls to scare them. We don’t need someone actually trying to exorcise you.”

“Oh, right! I’ll behave.” Without warning, Yuuji then swept Megumi into a bridal carry. “Let’s test my powers! I bet I’m faster than Gojou sensei now!”

“Wait! What are you doing?!”

Yuuji grinned down at Megumi with ruby red eyes glowing. “Trust me.” Cause I’ll kill anyone who dares to hurt you now...

[kareofbears]

persona 5 strikers thoughts and feelings

This is going to be a long post. Like, the type of post you’d only really have time to read when you’re trying to sleep but you’re not ready to be unconscious yet so you’re just looking for something to do to spend your time with minimal effort. 

So in 2018, a masterpiece was born into the world: Into the Spider-verse was released and it was amazing—it’s honestly the best spiderman movie we have without a doubt, and it’ll be very far into the future before Spider-verse is beaten as the best spiderman movie. Them’s the facts. Then in 2019, Spider-man: Far From Home was dropped. It’s a great movie! Great characters, great continuation of who these characters are and works fantastic as a continuation of a story. It’s really hard trying to take the torch of a previous movie (or in Marvel’s case, juggling twenty something movies) and come up with a new movie that both works on its own, as well as being the next step in this series of films. Thus, with that idea in mind, I think it’s kind of unfair to judge into the spiderverse and far from home, because these are two movies with two completely different objectives in mind. 

Okay, so this is still a persona 5 strikers post, I promise, but the idea is the same: Persona 5 could basically do whatever it wanted—new story, new characters, new everything, and it’s just plain old awesome. However, Persona 5 strikers did not have that sort of freedom. It was bound to the original game, and it had its own rules and stuff it had to keep intact, characters they had to work with, and on top of that, it had to justify its existence as a sequel (lets pretend money doesnt exist lmfao). 

SO, the big question is: did it do that? Did it justify its existence? 

And my answer: holy fuck did it ever do that

I came into this game knowing the extreme bare minimum. I knew there was someone named Sophia, and i knew there was roadtrip, and i knew there were Personas. That’s my knowledge of it before i played it on the Switch.  I should also clarify like, early on, that i was not expecting anything from this game. At all. I was the world’s biggest cynic of this game—if you scroll down my p5s tag far enough, youll just see me complaining about a game that hasn’t even come out yet. I was fully expecting to have this be a Waifu show, and any male character that isn’t Akira to just be shoved aside like some kind of nerd in a high school hallway, and i have never been more pleased to be wrong. In fact, i actually owe it an apology, because of how fucking rude i was for no reason!!! Because this game deserves everything to be honest. 

Persona 5 strikers is, frankly, insane. Insane in the sense that it got to pull shit off that just would never have existed in the original game, because the original game is scared. It had to be as impressive as possible and garner as much attention as possible. Strikers does not have that problem—every single person who bought that game does not need to be convinced that persona 5 is a good game. They already played it. That means Atlus can just fuck around and have a good time, and man did they have a good time. There’s still scenes that still shock me if i think about it too hard, because i’m used to atlus having to follow this sort of rule set when it comes to persona 5 (or any of the main games im assuming, but i havent played them.) And on top of that, there’s still shit that’s Atlus Trademarked Branded in a good way. The style of story of story telling, and revealing the mystery that is so integral to what p5 is, is still there. 

So, to make this even a little bit comprehensible, i will make a list! 

First of all, What is this game?

In short, this game is an OVA of an anime. It’s bonus side content that has one thing in mind: to showcase these lovable characters more by putting them in fun situations. That’s it, and it is just phenomenal. That was the main point of, i’d say, like forty hours of the game. It’s just fun times with fun characters. 

But to get deeper of what i think is happening, or what they were thinking during the development, is that this is a second opportunity. Persona 5 (as we all know) had a lot of problems, and we were not quiet about those problems. We yelled it all out, made posts, made complaints on every social media platform ever. And Atlus heard all of them, and Strikers is a way to mitigate those mistakes. Aside from being a fun OVA, Strikers also works to be a deeper exploration of these characters—more specifically, the characters that did not receive much in the original game. Creating this sequel is having the ability to redo what they felt (or to be more specific, we felt) in the original game while adding new ones. I will get to that in a second.  

The format of the game 

Absolutely brilliant to throw them on a road trip. P5V already forced us to experience Shibuya for 200+ hours, and im so glad that they didn’t do that again. Going from town to town, making us experience these new places alongside our favorite characters is so good, and it just makes sense. It’s fun, it’s lighthearted, and it’s actually shockingly good. But one thing i do want to talk about early on is the way the story unfolds and the villains that they use, and what they do with it because it’s very interesting. 

So as we explore japan and stuff, we encounter jails, and with those jails comes an antagonist. This antagonist works to be a parallel to one of our characters. That character will find it in their hearts to feel bad for the antagonist, because the antagonist could have been them had the original game not happen. At first I thought all of the thieves were gonna get an antagonist, and i was really hyped for the ryuji one. And then came to hour forty of the game where i realized “yeah that’s not gonna happen. There’s just not enough time.” And i was right, and the game ended. But i am not salty at all, honestly, because the people who got a direct antagonist were: Ann, Yusuke, and Haru. (we wont count zen and sophie). 

Is there a trend??? Yes. these are all characters in the original game that have received the worst treatment by atlus. The three of them are basically cast aside the minute they finished their original arc, and its horrible! BUT that’s why this is the path that atlus chose for them—to give them more depth, and screentime, and a way to show their inner self. That isn’t to say that the ones who aren’t those three (makoto, futaba, mona, akira, ryuji) didn’t get anything. Futaba still has her thing at the end with ichinose, and she was very prevalent and animated during the rest of the game. Mona and Akira have to be a focal points, that’s just the nature of the game. The other two though, I will talk about in depth in a second.  

Makoto

Y’all i poke fun at shumako fans sometimes cause its kind of easy and fun, but i honestly love makoto. In my very first playthrough of p5 (my first ever jrpg game, first persona game, i had no idea what i was doing), i had only maxed out two characters: ryuji and makoto. And i know she had a lot of screentime and love in the original game which is great, but i truly felt like she was dissed in this game. Her only roles were

A driver

Someone to tell them “we don’t have a choice. Let’s keep going and see where this takes us.” (seriously, if you replay this game, you will see how much she does this)

Idk, i just wish she had more to do, especially compared to how much love they gave the other characters. 

But let’s talk about some of the new characters! 

Zenkichi

Damn you atlus. Damn you and your insistence at bringing in cop characters. I was fully on board with hating zenkichi, i was fucking ready for it. I was convinced that there was nothing they could do convince to like zenkichi. I was immune to their copaganda. 

And then i ended up loving him, which makes me sad a little bit. I didn’t realize how desperate i was to have an adult who has a persona. Someone who wants the world to change just as much as they do, while still having that aspect of them that makes them adult. Like??? As someone who is technically an adult, its a breath of fresh air. An adult. Who fights. For justice. Using a persona. And god i love akane so much, and her obsession with the thieves (that scene is probably in my top ten fave scenes of the game). Also what i loved about zenkichi is that he fucking hates the cops!! He hates the system of the cops!! And thats why i actually really started to love him!! Because i thought it was atlus saying that the systematic problem of the police cannot be solved by one person, and zenkichi threw away his badge. I actually cried at that part!! 

But then he became a cop again, and i was just :/ but as a character, i really love him to bits and would love to do a study on him, or at least use him as an outside pov. But! i absolutely love his persona, since im a les miserables fan hehe

Sophia 

she’s probably my favorite new aspect of the game. I was ready to not like her—again, i just suck like that, lmfao—and when i saw her, i was scared that she was just another waifu. I mean, she was very cute after all. But then as the game went on, i thought she was a little too cute. And even further into the game, i finally slapped myself in the face and realized oh my god shes not a waifu. Shes a sister. 

That blew my mind, im ngl to you. A female character that isn’t supposed to be romanced? By jove, what a miracle! 

And she…is an amazing character. Im sorry, i just love her so much. I love her so much that she  probably ranks as my fifth or sixth favorite character which is surprising even to me. Everything about her is delightful and invigorating. She’s funny??? Her comedic timing is amazing, and she has such chemistry with the rest of the team. She’s actually useful to the plot, and while her character design is a little too on the nose for me in terms of cuteness (i mean, good god she’s wearing oversized sweater to show how cute and tiny she is, and her hair has literal hearts in it), she is absolutely lovable. 

But what i actually really wanna gush about for a second is sophia at the last stage of the game. You get the idea, i dont really like to get excited over things, so at this point i figured that there was nothing this game could do to shock me. 

And then sophia had a persona awakening. 

Like. holy fuck did i yell. I didnt realize what was happening until the music had already kicked in. and its just so fucking smart!!! Sophia??? The ai?? With no heart?? gOT A PERSONA???? AWAKENING??? BECAUSE SHE LEARNED WHAT THE HEART IS AND THE PASSION THAT YOU NEED IN ORDER TO GET A PERSONA??? I started crying honestly, because it was just so smart. And looking back on it now, its obvious!! Of course it would lead to this, it only made sense that the culmination of her character arc leads to her getting a persona, nothing else would have been as good. Also, her voice actor is just amazing?? When she was talking to ichinose at the end, i actually got incredibly emotional because of the line reads. Its just so spot on and it really captures the essence of sophia.

Muah. five stars Atlus. You got me. 

Ryuji <3!!!!

Oh man. Oh boy. Okay. so where do i start. 

Yall know i love him. Hes probably my favorite fictional male character of all time, and he is the one i was the absolute most cynical about in this game. I was expecting literally nothing. Nothing. Like. nothing. I thought he was just gonna keep being used as a joke, or a gag, and he’s gonna be super horny all the time for the other girls and it was gonna make me mad and there was gonna be some insane homophobic/queerphobic jokes in every other scene and i know i was being unfair, but i cant help it. 

And then i played the first two hours of the game, and i cried the entire time. Because ryuji has never been better than he is in this game. Its crazy. 

The ryuji in persona 5 strikers is who ryuji should have been/how he should have been treated this entire time. From the actual funny jokes (for example, the gold bar joke + his reaction to it in the beginning of the game), defending his female friends instead of being the one people need to defend from (natsume arc), and the fact that he was the one to be there with morgana and akira in the very beginning of the game. Its such a small thing that they didnt even need to do, but it was such an integral part of the original game for me, that i just was convinced that nothing like this was going to happen. But then it happened. Its just small stuff like that that could have been overlooked but it wasn’t because this game? Persona 5 strikers? Fucking loves ryuji. 

The actual respect they gave this boy is insane and i wasn't ready for it. Like, they gave the shujin trio lunch, they gave the little charm of the katana when they were in natsume’s jail, and, in my opinion this is the second-best thing that they could have given ryuji is sophia. Ryuji and sophia are the pinnacle of a brother & sister bonding relationship in the game that isn’t akira & futaba. And its really prevalent too?? Small stuff from the beginning of the game (pulling her out of a jail, calling her shorty), but then you have the iconic “shut the fuck up” scene, and that scene was so well characterized and written and voice acted, that somehow him saying “fuck” was the least exciting part of that scene to me. Ryuji is an older brother to her, like its undoubtable, and its only further cemented at the end of the game where Ryuji helps out ichinose because he knows how much sophia cares about her. This game. Love ryuji. And i love. This game. 

You know what else i love? Akiryu. 

Guys. i was fully prepared to starve in terms of akiryu. But theres just. So much of it. I wont get too deep into it, because i think this aspect of the game for me still needs marinate a little bit. Like, what was that last shot when EMMA died and Ryuji walked to approach Akira so they could relish in their victory together?? And the smile from both of them??? What the fuck. That was amazing. Also Joker being saved by Ryuji when he was about to fall from the cliff to save sophia??? WHAT. The LEADER AND HIS RIGHT HAND MAN? WHAT. anyway. If theres anything i want to keep for myself in my own brain, its the akiryu aspect of this game, so i wont talk too much about that part of things (instead, itll probably manifest in fic lmfaooo). 

Sure, there’s tidbits of stuff i dont like that they gave ryuji: sexualizing ann in that one cut scene and making him touch the jails even though it hurts, and i recognize those and frown at them, but for the most part, i am blown away with how they treated him.

Basically, Ryuji has never been better. From the opening of the game with him being the first text message and the one to sling his arm around akira, to the very last cut scene where it was ryuji wordlessly leaving because he’s so confident that they would never be separated for long, this game adores Ryuji and i am so so happy to say that.

The Royal aspect of things

Yeah, i had to talk about this, but itll be a short thing i just wanted to point out. Because the last part of this game...is persona 5 royal. Which is curious. Like taking reality and giving that power to someone else so you dont have to experience suffering anymore? And even like, the final section just looked a lot like the top half of maruki’s palace?? And whats even crazier is that we had a boss fight with sophia, just like how we had a boss fight with sumire? Royal and Strikers have like, the same thesis statement. It’s kind of uncanny.It’s interesting, it’s like atlus came up with these two ideas, and then just decided they liked both of them so much that they just did it twice. I don’t mind though—actually, in terms of how the last Palace/Jails go, i probably like them both about equally. 

Though i did love the final battle in this one more than i did in royal. Splitting into teams?? Thats cool as fuck, and really innovative and i didnt see it coming. It also kicked my ass. A lot. 

Now for the last stretch: the small stuff!

The music — bomb as fuck. In my heart, Daredevil is ranked the same as Rivers. Axe to grind is also amazing, but Daredevil owns me

Akechi — i really debated whether or not to talk about him, but i figured a bullet point should be enough. Im really shocked that he wasnt in this at all. Like not even a name drop. If this is an OVA, and the point of the game is to please the fans, and akechi is arguably the fan favorite character, i was really ready for something. But there was nothing, except for the pancake hallway if that even counts as a reference. Thats it. Thats all i wanted to say about him.

The humour — FUCKING HILARIOUS im convinced that in my fifty hour playtime, five of that is dedicated to me laughing and unable to continue the game 

Akira — so much personality! His lines of dialogue are crazy sometimes (like. Whats up with him saying Ryuji has ‘nice abs’ when they were in bath? Im crazy and even i dont know what the fuck that could mean) 

Battle system — oh my god i almost forgot to talk about this. I love it! I kind of miss the turn based aspect just because i found it very comforting for some reason, but this hack and slash style of gameplay is so invigorating because i do feel like it justifies shit like the baton pass and huge attacks.  This battle system fully encompases how the Phantom Thieves are supposed to fight, you know what i mean?

Anyway, thats my thoughts on strikers. Loved it. Amazing. 9.3/10, wouldve been higher but Konoe’s Jail almost bored me to death. Also im a monster and i didnt do any requests that isn’t a fun one, teehee. As if i play persona 5 for the persona aspect of things.

[holylulusworld]

My beloved daughter

Request: I was wondering if you would do a one-shot where Jensen's daughter is diagnosed with an auto immune disease like lupus? If you've heard of it?

Pairing: Jensen x Daughter!Reader, Jensen x Danneel

Warnings: angst, talk about autoimmune disease lupus, scared/sick reader,  comforting, medical procedures, language

“How about a movie night and some pizza?” Glancing at you Jensen wonders why you are silent. Something is bugging you; Jensen can see it written all over your face. “Kiddo, what’s wrong?”

“It’s nothing, dad.” Rubbing your left leg, you try to hide the pain or that you are scared something is terribly wrong with you.

“Y/N, I know something must be wrong. Does mom know?” Sitting next to you Jensen pats your thigh and you hiss in pain. “Okay, you are in pain, Sweetheart. What happened? Did you fall or did someone hurt you?”

“I don’t know…” Whimpering the words you nervously rub your arm. “Something is wrong, daddy.”

“What do you mean? Y/N, tell me what’s bugging you right now.” Brushing your hair aside you show Jensen a bald patch at the back of your head. “Y/N…”

“That’s not all, dad. Lately, I have joint pain and my muscles ache too. Worse than after a hard work out. I feel like I am tired all the time.” Sniffling you rub your eyes.

“You lost weight too, Y/N. Why didn’t you tell mom so?” Blinking the tears away you wipe your nose with the sleeve of your shirt.

“JJ was sick, and mom was so worried as the doctor told her it might be her appendix. I wanted them to have a nice weekend at the spa. I lied and said there’s a party at Sharon’s place.” Nodding Jensen takes your hand in his, squeezing it gently.

“I’ll get the car and we will drive to the hospital right now. No more hiding anything, Y/N. Wait here and daddy makes sure you will get help.”

On his way out of the house, Jensen needs to take deep breaths. With shaking fingers, he dials his wife’s number.

“We will need to make a complete check-up. Sarah over there will take some blood samples and I will call my colleague to let him have a look at the case of your daughter too. Mr. Ackles, I assume I know what your daughter is suffering off and if I am right, we need to talk about treatment and medication.”

Wide-eyed Jensen watches the doctor talk to the nurse. He can see the pity in her eyes as she takes several blood samples of you and his throat tightens.

“How worse is your assumption?” Voice trembling Jensen holds your hand as the doctor swallows hard.

“If I am right, and I hope I am not, its an autoimmune disease called lupus. But let’s hope my colleague will prove me wrong, Mr. Ackles. If you want to stay with your daughter, you can do so. I’ll be back as soon as we have the results.”

“Which tests will you do to find out if it’s this lupus thingy?” Looking at the doctor, scared the tests will hurt you squeeze your fathers’ hand.

“Don’t worry, Y/N. First, we will do an antinuclear antibody blood test. ANA is a type of antibody directed against the cells' nuclei.” Confused you look at the doctor, not understanding a single word he says.

“Let’s say this specific antibody is present in nearly everybody with active lupus. We use this test as a screening tool.”

“I don’t think I understand what you are saying but if it means we find out what’s happening to my daughter, we are all in, doctor.” Jensen stammers, holding your hand tighter.

“Don’t worry, Mr. Ackles. We will explain the tests more precisely later. For now, we will just name them, okay.” The doctor looks at you, a warm smile on his lips. “We will do more than one antibody test to be sure. We also will run some urine tests.”

Hours later Jensen paces around the hospital room. “Jensen, calm down, Baby. I know you are worried; I am too but we need to wait for the results. I searched for lupus and its…” Sniffling Danneel looks up at Jensen holding out her hand.

“I know, Danny but it drives me crazy to not know what’s wrong with Y/N. All those tests and the doctors running around, taking samples of my daughter.”

“Dad, I am scared…” Sniffling you look at Jensen and Danneel gets up to sling one arm around your shoulders. “We will get through his, Y/N. Everything is going to be alright.”

“What if I got this lupus thingy?” The door opens and you can see it in the doctor’s eyes. Whatever you have, it must be awful…

“Lupus…” Falling into a chair next to your bed Jensen holds back the tears. “My beloved daughter has an autoimmune disease?”

“We are sorry to tell you, Mr. Ackles but we are afraid it is lupus. We should talk about treatment, medications and what we can do to make Y/N live her life as normal as possible.”

While the doctor talks about how to ease your symptoms, bring down inflammation and how to prevent organ damage or other health problems you sniffle silently.

“Shhh, …we will make sure we find the best treatment, Y/N. You are not alone, Sweetheart. Mom and I are here, JJ too. Let’s listen to the doctor, okay.”

Nodding you lean your head against your fathers’ shoulder, listening closely to the doctor’s explanations. With every word leaving the doctor's mouth you become angstier.

Weeks ago, you were a healthy girl and now you suddenly feel like you are going to die or never be able to live the life you imagined.

“Don’t worry, Y/N. We will be going to kick that diseases ass…” Jensen whispers and you chuckle lightly. “Whatever you need, mom and I will make sure you’ll get it…”

SPN Forever Tags

@donnaintx​, @screechingartisancashbailiff​, @fallen-wolf22​, @sister-winchesters99​, @mogaruke​, @the-is13​, @helloitsmeamie203​, @sandlee44​, @strayrosesbloom​, @notyourtypicalrose​, @thewinchesterco​, @marvelfansworld​ @hobby27​, @gh0stgurl​, @flamencodiva​, @jay-and-dean​, @voltage-my2dlove​, @spnhollis​, @chonisberonica​, @wittysunflower​, @supernaturalenchanted​, @shikshinkwon​, @yolobloggers​, @hhiggs, @laxe-from-outer-space​, @ilovefanfic86​, @linki-locks11​, @eggingamazinglove​, @trumpettay​, @fandom-imagines1​, @thenamelesschibi​, @waywardbaby​, @straycuties9​, @drakelover78​, @stuckys-whore​, @zxph-yr​, @i-love-superhero​, @unlikelysamwinchesteronahunt​, @deepmuffinspymaker​, @katsav17, @heyitscam99​, @fandom-princess-forevermore​, @neii3n​, @exo-nova​, @cocklesbelli​, @echoesofpassion​, @lauravic​, @shatteredabby​, @deanmonandnegansbitch​, @sea040561​, @lemondropirwin​, @lonewolf471​, @wronglanemendes​, @juniorhuntersam​, @helpmeluci​, @goodgodimaweirdperson​, @shadowkat-83​, @alltimesamantha​, @officialmarvelwhore​, @meganywinchester​, @miraclesoflove​, @maniacproffesor​, @hollymac79​, @kayla-2000​, @gracefultrenchcoat494​, @babygirls-fav​, @spnwoman​, @amiquette​, @alexoloughlinlover32​, @geekofmanyforms​, @jessica-marsh09​, @spnficgirl​, @shut-themoonscone​, @thequeenreaders, @countrygal17a, @atomicfandombomb, @kteelou, @soryuwifeyxx, @kricketc28, @defenderrosetyler, @shortwinchester, @maybesomedaygayyyy, @tmiships4life, @sabascio, @that-place-called-middle-earth, @the-broken-angel-13, @bunnybaby89, @pandabiiissh, @maddiedott, @lilulo-12, @theoneandonlymelol, @mblaqgi, @clawsandshotguns, @justsomedreaming, @cassiopeia-barrow, @its-the-timey-wimey-winchesters, @mscarter213, @jo-like-josette, @mep6811, @prettydeaneyes, @rvgrsbrns, @deanwanddamons, @tearsforhan, @skittlebittz​, @certaindeanwinchesterforcastiel

Dean/Jensen Forever Tags

@spnfamily-j2​, @supernatural-bellawinchester​, @negans-lucille-tblr​, @deans-baby-momma​, @thefaithfulwriter​, @squirrelnotsam​, @roonyxx​, @neerness​, @deansgirl-1968​, @spn-dean-and-sam-winchester​, @butifulsoul125​, @lyinginthegingerlocks​, @20gayneen​, @janicho88​, @woodworthti666​, @thevelvetseries​, @dreaminemz​, @akshi8278​, @midnightsilver16830​, @mrspeacem1nusone​, @ria132love​, @caligraphee​, @the-witch-in-silence​, @justanotherwinchester​, @multisuperfandom​, @jason-todd-squad​, @jadesupernatural​, @psychicforest​, @luciathewinchestergirl​, @magssteenkamp​, @palefiregiver​, @tranquility-or-chaos​, @jxackles​, @michellemxndes​, @addictedtofictionalcharacters​, @gabifernandessn​

[thethousandyearwitch]

The Show Must Go On! - A Youtuber AU you didn’t want and didn’t need

Hisoka Morrow, italian Makeup Youtuber, enjoys his life in the comfort and occasional drama of his profession. But nothing brings more drama into his life than the eldest son of the Zoldyck fashion magazine empire.

Meanwhile, aspiring australian Twitch Streamer Gon Freecs forms a special bond to a Speedrunner commonly going by "Kil".

Chapter 3

FF.net link - AO3 link

Illumi woke up to shouting. No matter how often this happened, it would startle him each and every time, and prompted him to jump out of bed and try to locate the source of commotion. After he brushed his hair messily out of his face, he approached the dining room. He leaned against the doorframe, peeking into the large room. His mother was seated in her usual spot at the large table, clutching her hands over her mouth. On the opposite side, Illumis younger brother had pushed his chair away, standing up to gesture and shout wildly at his mother.

“I am not a little kid! No one else gets their ~technology privileges~ revoked! Just admit that you’re too bad of a mother to properly keep me under the control you so badly want!” His voice was already starting to crack under the strain. Illumi thought about interfering, though the curiosity of observing how his mother would try to keep the situation under control won him over.

Kikyo Zoldyck was the perfect matriarch, ruling over the English estate with an iron grip, while her Husband was either in their Japanese estate for business matters, or on ‘hunting trips’ with his father. She always insisted on perfect presentation of herself and her children, Illumi wasn’t sure if he had ever seen her repeat one outfit combination. It was a shame that the medical sunglasses she had to wear at all times ruined the harmony of her outfits almost all times. Because not even the perfect matriarch can avoid medical problems. Thus, Kikyo had to learn how to properly treat her oversensitive eyes, taking most of her eyesight with it. On top of that, her immune system seemed to weaken with each passing day. Illumi, as the eldest child, got to investigate some of her medical records to ensure her safety in case of an emergency. He had learned how to dress her wounds that would re-open frequently, how to apply eyedrops in case she wasn’t able to, and which medication was for which ailment.

Illumi recognized the exhaustion that was quickly overtaking his mother, the way her face had been drained of all colour, and her entire body seemed to shake under the tension. He was about to intervene before her conditioned worsened, when she spoke up again, “I just want to do what is best for you! It will be good for you to have a break from all that bad energy the computer gives you.”

“The only bad energy I get is from this fucking family!”

The swear echoed through the large room, and for a few seconds there was only silence as a mother confronted the reality of her precious son having entered yet another teenage rebellion. Illumi observed his mothers face closely, as he thought again about whether he should intervene or let her tend to her motherly duties herself.

It took a couple more seconds for Kikyo to stand up, straighten herself, and raise her voice, unshaking, unwavering. “You are going to your room this instance, young man. I will have your brother remove your computer from your room in half an hour.” Consequent, how surprising.

The young Zoldyck kicked against a table leg, before running out of Illumis field of view. The last thing he heard was “I am going to drink a hundred Energy drinks and puke on everything you love!”

With a sigh Kikyo sat back down in her chair and rested her face gently in the palms of her hands. Illumi took this silence as the best opportunity to enter the room and approached his mother's side.

"Mother, good morning."

"Oh, Illumi, what am I going to do?" She wailed again, as if this argument was the greatest tragedy to befall the family.

"He was such a good little boy just a few years ago. Now he swears, and yells, and that same twinkle of rage in his eyes, just like his father."

He is also my father, Illumi thought, though that minor detail didn't seem important to the conversation.

"I will take away his personal Computer after getting dressed."

"Illumi, you are such a good child for your mom, never disappoint her, alright?" She took his hand and pressed it firmly. The young man shuddered at the contact, it was so easy to forget how cold and thin her hands were, as if the bones and tendons could snap under any more pressure. He rested his free hand on top of hers, reassuring, comforting, he thought, having seen people do that in movies and shows. Real comfort and contact were of course a rarity in the Zoldyck family. After Killuas birth, Kikyo would pour all her overbearing love onto him, only to have it be rejected, repeating the process with slightly more success after Kallutos birth. The children would tolerate each other, though interaction was kept to the bare minimum. And though Illumi was sure that his parents were in love, at least to the extent that he understood what that meant, he could not recall the last time he witnessed them exchange any form of endearment.

"Of course, mother." With that, he broke the contact, and returned to his room. He traded his pyjamas for comfortable black slacks, and a loose white button down with light green roll-tabs. The eldest Zoldyck child took his time brushing his well-groomed black hair, fixed his collar, and gave himself a last look down in the mirror.

As he walked down the long hallway of the second floor of the mansion, he could already hear the loud music his younger brother was angrily blasting, considering if it were worth it to go back and grab earplugs.  Their mother was right, Killuas tantrums had picked up the last couple of years, and it only seemed to have gotten worse. Show dogs with bad temper get temporary Hormone chips implanted, he thought, I wonder if there is an equivalent for humans.

The door to Killuas room wore its signs of anger and emotions through patched-up holes and sloppy paint cover-ups. Illumi turned the doorknob, though he already expected it to be locked.

“Killu, open the door.”

The music turned louder, and Illumi scrunched his nose in frustration. “Killu.”

“Piss off!” The young boys voice strained against the loud music, barely reaching over the aggressive lyrics of a middle-aged man complaining about his life and whatever he deemed wrong with it.

Enough with the polite formalities, Illumi thought as he fumbled in his pockets for the master key he had been entrusted with a couple years prior. Effortlessly the lock clicked open, and the knob turned once more… But the door did not budge.

Another turn of the knob, push of the door, with just slightly more force, and a small gap formed for just a second.

“Are you leaning against the door?” In fact, Killua forced his entire weight against the door. Illumi might have thought it was a cute attempt, if it hadn’t been directly intervening with his goals. So, he gave a more hearted push, which forced the door to open wider before it snapped shut again.

“Just leave me alone!”

“I will leave you alone once I have confiscated your Computer. This is your last chance to behave and let me in.”

“I’m going to set all your ugly new fabric on fire!”

Illumi sighed in frustration, before he pushed harder against the door in a swift motion, forcing it open despite Killuas best efforts to push against it. Quickly the young boy jumped in front of his computer, arms spread as a last-ditch barrier. Illumi approached slowly, his head tilted slightly to the side. “Killu, you misbehaved and now you have to accept the consequences. This is going to be a good lesson for you, you can spend your time being more productive.”

Killua straightened his back and returned his older brothers emotionless stare. “You don’t know what’s good for me! No one here does!”

“You don’t know what’s good for yourself either, you are a child. In a couple of years, when you lead the company, you’ll be very thankful to me for this.” Without much of an effort, he shoved his younger brother aside, and started to unplug the computers various wires. Almost immediately after he had been pushed away, Killua started grabbing and punching at his brother’s hands and arms in a vain effort to stop him. “Illumi, please, don’t!” His voice started to crack and break under the pressure it has already been under the entire morning. “Can you just for once not do whatever the hell mom tells you to do, and actually help me? Please?”

Illumi lifted the tower of the computer and straightened his back, facing his brother again. A surprisingly gentle smiled creeped up his lips.

“Killu, I am helping you. And your future. And the future of the Zoldyck family.” He started to turn to the door and leave, though not before he could hear Killua scream out in frustration,

“I hate you, you fucking lap-dog!”

But of course, Illumi knew that wasn’t true. Killua couldn’t hate him. They were brothers, and there is nothing that could sever a bond like that. Even after Killua had already set fire to his brother’s fabric stock before. Even though the times he would tell him he hates him started to outweigh the times he said he loved him. Even now, Illumi having taken away something that seemed so absurdly important to Killua, he was sure his little brother could never truly despise him.

As is with everything that the children weren't supposed to have, the Computer tower got locked away inside Silva Zoldycks study. Illumi couldn't place the feeling, but something felt off about no longer having this rule apply to him, not only because there was never any reason to punish him this way, but also because he had access to this otherwise off-limits area.

Fucking Lap-dog.

The grandfather clock in the entrance hall of the mansion struck 9 am. Technically he was still on schedule, Illumi didn't want to risk any more distractions that could make him late. He grabbed the neatly packed black suitcase and leather bag from his room, double checking if he had packed all of his samples, extra fabrics, and the likes, before returning to the dining room.

Kikyo had restored her makeup from any flaws the earlier breakdown had caused. She idly reviewed articles that third-party journalists had send in, in the hopes that they might make it into the next issue of the highly appraised fashion magazine. Her protective black eyewear had been gently pushed down the slope of her nose, revealing the stinging red, bloodshot eyes underneath.

“Mother, I am leaving for the airport shortly.” He kept his voice low while he slowly approached her side. Kikyo discarded the article she was holding into one of the neat piles she had made, presumably one pile for rejected articles, one for second review, before she faced her son.

“How long are you going to be away for, again?” It almost sounded accusatory.

“About four to five days, depending on the flight availability, and if I can make new clients after the show.”

“Try to make it four days, I need you back here to handle some interviews for the September Issue.”

Illumi hated being on a tight schedule. Though he was good at working under pressure, he still did not like it. “Can’t Milluki tr- “

“Milluki is extremely busy editing, Illumi. You shouldn’t try to push your work onto your brother like that, just because you want to have a longer vacation.”

It’s not a vacation, it’s a reveal of a personal collection that I earn my own money with and make independent clients at and that I worked day and night on and also-

“I will do my best to be home as soon as possible, mother.”

“Good. Try to represent our family well at the show.” And with that, Kikyo picked another article from the large stack, seemingly satisfied with the parting conversation.

Illumi grabbed his bags and made his way towards the entrance hall. A chauffeur already stood ready to drive him to the airport, and from a glance to the clock he knew his schedule was still intact. In his head he marked off his to-do list, double and triple checking if he had gotten everything he needed. Tickets, wallet, samples, customary gi- where is it? Hastily he started rummaging through the leather bag.

“Looking for something?” Killua appeared in the doorway behind him, carelessly throwing a small plastic package from one hand to the other. “Since when do you like red liquorice?”

Illumi scanned the package, relieved when he spotted the red ribbon still neatly tied around it. “It’s not for me.”

“You’re buying candy for your clown-friend?” Killua scoffed.

“He’s not my friend, and not a clown.” Illumi tilted his head as he blankly stared Killua down. “Can you give that back to me now? It is just a customary gift.”

“If you give me my computer back, you’ll get the clowns candy back.”

The air turned cool as Illumi slowly approached his younger brother, head tilting from one side to the other, his voice kept low.

“Killu, you are not in the position to propose trades like that.” He rested a hand on his brothers’ shoulder, leaned down to whisper easily in his ear. “I did you a favour by not reminding mother of your phone. Don’t make me regret being kind to you.”

And as he felt his brother freeze under his touch, he grabbed the candy with ease, and turned back around.

“I’ll see you in a couple of days, Killu. Study good.”

 -------------------------------------------------------------

 Hisoka lounged on his fainting couch, the midday sun coated his living room in a comfortable orange shine through his white balcony drapes. The temptation of a nap settled sweetly on his eyelids, still worn out from another night spent editing and releasing a new video. The pressure of trying to stay on schedule during a fashion week wasn’t necessarily something Hisoka looked forward to, so he only hoped that this new drama video would keep his fans at bay for a couple of days, something about a doll-maker channel who seemed to have a god complex.

Just as he was about to give into the warm comfort of sleep, the vibration of his phone pulled him back.

" Bellisimo <3: Will arrive in about 10 minutes. "

"Hisoka: Yes, your majesty! "

Now wide awake, the artist stretched his tired limbs, and pulled himself from the couch. Once he had made his way to the kitchen, preparations for his friend’s arrival had to be made. Out from the fridge he took a small, colourful box, tied shut at the handle with an elegant black ribbon. Not room temperature, but not cold out of the fridge either. Neatly, he placed a white porcelain plate and a cake fork on the kitchen island. The last step, of course, was to boil water and wait.

Waiting wasn't one of Hisokas specialties though. He paced around the apartment like a mad animal in a zoo, only stopping once in a while to re-arrange knickknacks on shelves and desks. The anticipation tingled in his fingertips.

The sound of a car coming to a hold. Hisoka grabbed the bag of black tea and dropped it in the water.

The snap of multiple car doors. He slowly poured the fresh tea into a clean white cup and placed it next to the plate.

 Ding ♪

 There was no need to even ask who it was over the intercom, all he needed to do was activate the buzzer for the main door and linger at the apartment door for just a couple more seconds. He listened to the footsteps ascending the stairs. Only one pair; how rude to make your Chauffeur wait.

 Knock Knock

Hisoka swung the door enthusiastically open, the excitement to see the other almost too much to handle.

Blank, dark eyes greeted him. Illumis hair was, as usual, combed to a silky perfection. Hisoka was just a couple of centimetres taller than him, but he still felt an urge to tower over the other, to hunt him into a corner like small prey.

But instead he stepped aside, gave the other one enough room to enter the apartment. This last test of patience had become practiced, but never seemed to get easier. He wanted to greet and touch and release the tension tugging at all his muscles and nerves-

But not before Illumi has settled in. That was the rule.

So, he waited and watched as the other one dropped a leather brief case next to the kitchen island, and seated himself in front of the table set. Gracefully Illumi lifted the cup of tea to his lips, and he took a small sip, eyes closed and composed.

Full of expectation Hisoka leaned closer towards his visitor, who in turned tilted his head ever so slightly to the side, opening the dark void to his eyes once more.

"Acceptable."

Immediately Hisoka lunged forward and wrapped his arms around Illumi. "It's so nice to have you back, darling! Is the flavour alright? I bought it from a store in Florence and they promised it would be up to British taste."

"It is tolerable- Hisoka let go before I burn your face with this." Illumi struggled his way out of the embrace and pulled the wrinkles out of his shirt. "But next time you will have to let the tea sit longer in the water before serving, so that the flavour can fully develop."

“The day I make the perfect tea for you, I deserve a wild celebration.” The makeup artist waved his hand in a celebratory gesture and took a seat next to his friend-who-doesn’t-call-him-friend. “You hungry?”

Illumi bend over the table and tugged at the ribbon that kept the colourful box at the centre of the table closed. The folds of the box came undone to reveal a beautiful chocolate roll cake, with white-chocolate flower décor neatly placed on top. Hisoka held out a knife for him to take, and the treat was cut into in one smooth motion. A last test of approval.

Hisoka watched closely as Illumi took the first bite. The way his eyes closed as soon as the fork came to his lips. The almost-unnoticeable roll of his head in consideration. How he bopped his fork up and down. Everything about Illumi Zoldyck screamed grace and life and anticipation for every passing second. And in this moment, he was all his.

“It’s very good.”

“I would have made cake myself, but I didn’t feel like poisoning you, my dear.”

“Appreciated. I have a gift for you, as thanks for your hospitality.” Illumi bend down and grabbed his leather bag. While he shuffled around in it, Hisoka lured over his shoulder, with the smile of an excited child on Christmas morning. “Continue breathing down my neck and you won’t get anything.”

Not wanting to risk missing out on the oh-so-rare show of affection Illumi promised, he leaned back. “Do you want me to pretend to be coy and not want your gift, or can I just greedily rip it from your hands?”

The black-haired man turned around, and presented a small plastic package, tied shut with a red ribbon. It took less than a second to recognize what it was.

“Just take it. You mentioned once that you like it, and you’ve significantly improved at being a host for these meetings.”

Hisoka took the present from the others hands, far more gentle than necessary, and he snickered. “This is the strangest friendship I’ve been a part of.”

“We are not friends.” Ouch.

“This is the strangest... partnership?”

Illumi rolled his eyes, “If you want to call it that. But if you tag me in a video again as your ‘partner’ again, you’ll never see me again. I don’t need more congratulatory-slash-death-threat letters.”

“Fair enough!” Hisoka jumped off his chair and circled around the other one. “But mentioning videos, how about we start recording for our collab? I am practically dying to finally try on my new suit.”

Illumi sighed, brushed some stray hairs behind his ear, and dug through his leather bag again, only this time to retrieve a neatly folded, string-tied package. “Id suggest wearing a plain black shirt under the jacket.”

Hisoka grinned, “What about- “

“You are going to wear a shirt under it.” Ouch, too fast.

Without another word, he took the clothes from Illumi, and disappeared into his bedroom. As he ripped at the neat packaging, he tried to think of a snarky way to make fun of this overly neat way to transport clothing. But all those thoughts vanished when he actually held the clothes in his hands, gentle fingertips that ran over firm fabric and neat seams. The pictures in the email didn’t give this piece the justice it deserved. The different coloured card-suits didn’t stand out too harshly against the white jeans fabric but were defined enough to be recognized for what they are.

And once he pulled the fabric on his body, corrected the collar of the jacket, and stretched a bit to get a feel… He was mesmerized. The mirror fixed to his closet door couldn’t even capture the feeling in his chest that threatened to punch out his sternum.

Hisoka practically sprinted back into the open kitchen and struck rapid poses. “Do I look as good as how I feel, darling?”

“I told you to wear a shirt, maggot.”  

[floralkittygambler]

Return of The Thing

Sort of. By thing, I mean me. But I love this movie and the meme. Ok, context for this post: - Where I’ve been - Why I left - Whats hip happening -  Where I’ve Been:

Long story short, I’ve had real life matters to deal with. Firstly, my entire household contracted COVID. Well, *almost*. We’ve been through constant testing, quarantine zones, and had the ambulance up numerous times. My parents and 2nd oldest sister were hit the hardest. My 3rd oldest sister was positive and asymptomatic. Now something none of us could predict that I would be completely COVID free despite my compromises. Despite that I was in close contact with them all, including the 2nd oldest who contracted it first and accidentally being coughed on a few times lol. I went through the exact same testing and yet nothing. No symptoms. No presence of COVID. And I took no precaution to isolate from my family as I presumed in our small house we’d all get it, so I was more preoccupied with caring for the sick. Ultimately, I’ve either gotten off scott free this time or there’s a chance I may actually either be highly resistant or even immune. Even then, I WILL be having the vaccine as and when my family are eligible. And we all still follow regulations set.  I’ve also had other real life obligations, much of it either mundane fixing up my living circumstances to more personal matters. Overall, I have been extremely preoccupied.

A mini update, the stray cat Big has been in our porch a lot more in recent times due to the snow as well as being even more affectionate. And Queefster passed away after a good life and a full tummy. Why I Left:

Aside from COVID, business, and my own health declining, I’ll be blunt. I left because of how disgustingly toxic most fandoms are nowadays, but Hazbin is one of the WORST for it. That includes harassment, death threats, mocking MI and triggering an ED. In fact, I’ve even seen others get rape and death threats. So yes, even if YOU are a decent fan, collectively most of you arent doing any favours. Even some critical blogs seem to be overtly catty in ways no one else seems to pick up on under this ‘look how blunt I am’ look and it’s just... You dont have to be a prick to have your say, to be honest and to disagree with the trending. That’s a few on and off of tumblr, and no one I follow anyways. 

In regards to my ‘sensitivities’ - two things: 1) Of course trauma is going to hurt, 2) Im fully aware of kids doing and receiving much of this, which hurts MORE. I have my own lil squids and Im worried of them eventually having to deal with this shit. And no, no one SHOULD have to put up with such rude and poor behaviour. Agree to disagree doesnt live in some people’s realities, but by God harassment and bullying seems ok if YOURE doing it or enticing it. That ISNT ok. Even if it seems like nothing to you it could kill another. I certainly will not take your shit. 

On huskerdust I STAND by my words. It’s fucking creepy and there is sexual harassment and obsession. And there are large triggers. I will not go into detail here because Ive done that dance before and I’ll be refining it again. YOU may like it, however it triggers my very real traumas as well as those in my bloodline. Be respectful and keep that shit away from me. And for goodness sake, parents PLEASE dont raise your children to behave as such online. And no, being anon isnt actually fully anonymous. Also to send hate and threats anon is not only traceable but also cowardice. Grow a pair and find a hobby. I avoid my traumas for the most part. I will not allow you to weaponise or diminish my own or others experiences for your fictional based gratification. Likewise, if it becomes canon, I’ll just make an AU where it is not. Simple. You can hate it but Im not your personal circus so go be toxic elsewhere. IF you like HD and follow me, honestly... Youre probably better to unfollow as I am deeply and passionately against it and stolitz, and valvox, and am very vocal on that. Dont mistake my traumas and discomfort as a personal attack - and dont personally attack me over it either. And before anyone claims homophobia, no. This is nothing to do with sexuality. You arent the victim. If you love these pairings with your soul to the point of a ‘stan’, then youre best off unfollowing because I really am too old for extremists and rabid fans more crazed than the infected in REC. Also I never used to hate angel but now... Fans behaviour is abhorrent and hes so over saturated that I honestly really dislike him now. Doesnt mean you have to hate him too, but just bloody respect that angel isnt loved by all, he can be triggering to some as well as toxically enabling [incl. past addicts], a vile homophobic gay stereotype and just overall a lack of knowledge and respect of sex workers as a whole. When you know a lot of the ins and outs and victims, it’s hard to overlook. I respect your triggering ships by avoiding that mess. Respect others.  The problem with Viv - and I will elaborate in the future - is that your audience is often a reflection of your work and it’s message/presentation. And most of the fandom Ive met are awful. Honestly, though lonesome I find more comfort keeping distant from fandoms because yall often extremely toxic and petty. Perhaps others have had better experiences than I however Im drawing a line in the sand. For MY sake. I’m annoyed with virtually anyone I sense great potential in that becomes wasted. Im angry at Viv because she can do so much better but is blocking HERSELF. This is from a creative and business mindset. When someone has potential that gets wasted - especially creatively - it burns me. Im just passionate on artistic fields. It doesnt mean I hate them. I hate the waste of full potential.

I’ll state things here people disagree with but encouraging harassment, hate or just being an overall cunt just aint on- It’s like people charade as being this fair being but its all bullshit. Self improve and sod off, I do NOT have time to parent you online. 

And obviously there are RL duties I must fulfil. Some in which I will need the publics assistance for if you can spare it. Overall, Im just... Fandoms behaviour generally disgusts me. Disappoints me. We SHOULD be better than this. It’s like listening to bloomin incels rant on fuckin chad or some bullshit pill theory instead of looking to improve themselves too. Honestly... I do mostly acknowledge my own flaws and faults and try to improve each day. It just feels fewer folk see that in themselves and do the same. And that’s coming from an old cunt whos far from fuckin perfect. Also, my fuckin laptop broke so I waited a week for a bloke nearby to fix it. What a fuckin lifesaver, he’s the real mvp!

Also Also, one of you did privately apologise and I appreciate that. I certainly hope we agree to disagree and continue to grow as people on our separate ways. Trust me, I dont forget small acts like this. Even the trauma that caused and the aftermath, please dont think I dont appreciate the apology. However you’re also entitled to know that the forgiveness and healing side may take longer for me due to various factors that occurred - much that few are aware of, including yourself especially. I wish you well and safety.

Hip Happenin Now:

Still busy but slowly visiting. I’ll reply and reblog soon, be patient please. Ive still many things to sort which take priority as well as other things. Im trying to get money n shit for a future and whatnot. Health issues are strong in the blood rn and Im spending extended time with both Big and the other pets to keep up harmony, especially now that Big is accepting slowly that our porch is a welcome shelter for him and he’s free to leave and stay whenever. Trust me, overloaded isnt even the word. Im prepping shit early this year and from now on. Also, my God Ive been dealing with more physical issues as well and had to play doctor. May even need medical interference but holy shit I could never see this coming. Still... It’s... An experience- If you could call it that. Staying more active and healthy. Cat’s nearly clawed my eye out in my sleep (to which I can only presume Billy got too close or hyper) but it’s fortunate placement so Im alright. Most of my body is in pain to the point of absolute normality at this rate. And I plan to make space for a better altar. Future of the Blog: 

Errr, it’s my fuckin space so it’s whatever I want really. Ill still have my Viv rants (ie, pros and cons of her work, HH/HB, other shit like that) however I just really dislike most the fandom at this point as well as the poor management and lack of professionalism and attitudes of staff. It’s just draggin me down and making me ill. I also want to showcase more of MY work (from redesigns to projects to some dumb 2am shit), cosplays, fashion, hobbies, spiritual practises - MY. SHIT. I feel like Ive strayed slightly. But I WILL be honest. And damn well will it upset people. And if it does and I’m genuinely ding something wrong/harmful - guide me patiently. Educate me. If it’s like this HD shit where Im not only allowed my opinions but justified on my traumas or mocking my disabilities or features, then just yeet yourself elsewhere. Also some of my gaming shit too. Getting to know folk who interact with my stuff and just... Create my space. For me. Something hopefully others can enjoy. Something that can function as a bit of an art portfolio as well. Critiques and whatnot.  But I will continually not stand for anyone’s shit or poor handling of serious matters. You will not cause me to doubt and invalidate my experiences like you have to others.  For now, Im tottering but slowly returning. For those who I previously and daily interacted with, I will get back to you. And Im sure you’re patient and understanding of my situation - it’s appreciated. But in terms of any fandom, more so if it’s known to be as hostile, I’d rather keep a healthy boundary between us. That’s for newer folk. Perhaps we may bond further and you’re welcome to try, however I do feel far safer not getting involved into other people’s shit any longer. I will put anon back on but any toxic shit will be reported as well as compiled so at least I have a reference on the actual toxic nature of fandoms. Likewise, Im slowly getting there but god theres a lot of fuckin work. So much that not even my closest friend has heard too much from me until recently. I’ll be returning to the grind for now as I have duties, as well as many demanding felines for my attention. Alongside some physical medical concerns which require additional care, I’ll be popping off now.  Im thankful for those who have checked in on me. I will reply shortly. Take care