#probably will follow eden's stuff but also like

[sivunas]

playing v rising has been making me want to make / revive all my vampire verses sjkdcs

[fleouriarts]

feeling bad about my art lately. will probably not post for a while. but i wanted to at least dump some stuff here before i retreat into my hidey hole

[accirax]

Danganronpa: Despair Time Chapter 2 Episode 15 Dissection

FINALLY, I have a Friday night with few enough plans that I can watch and give my initial thoughts on the episode on the day that it aired >:D

... why am I celebrating being all alone on a Friday night? (/j)

Dissection time! This will be a Part 1 because I finally actually ran out of images. Please check the reblogs to see my further thoughts on the episode!

SPOILERS for Danganronpa: Despair Time Chapter 2 Episode 14. Brief mentions of eating disorders and suicide.

Of course, it's also the first week where I probably won't have as much to say, not because there isn't stuff to comment on about the episode, but because the main thing that ate up my time/word count was assessing all of the evidence to talk about who the killer might be. Now that the killer has seemingly been revealed, there isn't really any "Chapter 2 murder" left to theorize about... that's insane.

Starting the episode off with Teruko saying that accusing Ace was her "judgment" was wild. She made it very clear that it wasn't just that she was humoring Eden or haphazardly starting with Ace first, but that she thought it over and decided that Ace was the more-likely-to-be-guilty party because of seeing Eden break down like that. She paid attention to Eden's emotions and let Eden into her heart! That's awesome!!!

(Not to say that you couldn't pay attention to Eden's emotions and still think that she was the culprit-- I'd be a pretty big hypocrite if I tried to argue that. And I just don't think that it's true.)

This is a really random point to bring up, but I remember from drawing my J-to-Xander secret santa exchange that one of J's main complaints about Xander was also that he was loud. I guess J just really hates loud people.

... David, put down the megaphone--

Now this surprised me. It really made sense to me that Arturo would be the one stalking Eden, given that we first heard about the stalking on the day that Arturo and Eden had their chat!

Although, it also makes sense that it wasn't, given that the Arturo/Eden conversation probably happened after the event where J pulled Teruko into that closet (just based on Arturo's vibes). That event was the last thing that Teruko did before the nighttime announcement rang. Thus, Eden talking to Arturo probably happened pretty late in the afternoon, not giving Arturo much time to have been following Eden. To be fair, I deemed that it could still very well be Arturo anyways, because it's not like Eden said anything such as "you've been following me all day" that truly indicated a time period. But it does make sense.

Seems like everyone who thought that the culprit could have been tailing Eden was correct! A round of applause for everyone who put those pieces together 👏 (/gen)

Now, this one, I don't believe I saw ANYONE speculate. Therefore, as an idea I'd never even heard tossed around, this really took me out. It makes sense, though: Eden is small and semi-canonically the weakest character in the killing game. Therefore, if you're looking for someone who you can near-guaranteed overpower, it makes sense if you were to target her.

On one hand, thinking down this line of logic makes me worried for Eden's survival prospects beyond Chapter 2. On the other, now that this has been directly addressed in canon, I find it less likely that someone will use that again down the line. The best place to do so would be at the next Class Trial, so that the logic can be "well, looks like someone tried to execute on Ace's original plan" when it's at its most relevant because Ace's crime would be at its most recent. However, I don't really think that Eden will be a victim at the next Class Trial, so I'm leaning towards saying that she wouldn't become a victim for that reason.

(It feels so unnatural to write out "Ace's crime" and be, like 95% certain that it's canon. This case is just one of the unsolved mysteries of history, the fuck??? (/j))

This was ALSO insane to me. I know that thebadjoe cited Ace claiming to have been in the Gym the day after he nearly died in there as a reason why Ace might have been lying about what day he overheard Arei and David on (the logic is probably somewhere in here), but I think I and many others just figured that he didn't want everyone to think he was a coward, or that his eating disorder would compel him to go back to the Gym anyways.

However, going back to the Gym to sus out how exactly Nico's contraption works makes perfect sense! J was right, if Ace was suffering through being killed when he awoke, he shouldn't have had the presence of mind to figure out the crime then and there. However, if he could combine the flashes he got of what happened while he was swinging from the fan, whatever he was able to make out when he ran out of the room to chase Nico, and being able to inspect the Gym after the fact, I think it's totally reasonable that he could have figured out what happened with enough clarity that he could replicate its essential elements elsewhere.

As it turns out, despite my crack at trying to figure out what happened, the Gym murder method wasn't actually all that complex.

Teruko: One. Given that you were stalking Eden before the Nico incident, you were already planning a murder beforehand. You entered the Gym with the pre-existing intent to take the tape for some different, unspecified murder plan, and changed your mind on the details later. Two. You were pretending to be unconscious for longer than we thought. And three. You took the tape for first aid.

Dammit, fellow "but it wouldn't have made sense for Ace to take the tape right after the attempt" truthers... I think she may have cooked us. (/j)

But hey, we love to see Teruko representing the "let me explain out various theoretical options by listing and discussing them numerically" crowd! It's always great to see yourself represented in media ;P Even if I never came up with any of these theoretical options.

My guess is probably that, of the options, the first is the most likely. I also think that Teruko probably agrees with that, given that it was what she went to first and it had the longest explanation. It's not really important, though, and I don't think there's any way to truly know, so I don't have much else to say about it.

Teruko noooooooooo :(

Whit FINALLY gets a new sprite and THIS is the expression and context?????? I love him.

Speaking of, I think that, thus far, the characters to have received new sprites in Chapter 2 Part 2 are Teruko, Ace, Arei, Hu, David, Veronika, Whit, and Nico? I'm not certain about whether Eden, Levi, or Rose had any, but I don't think they did. If true, I can't believe that Eden got through such a major role in the story without picking up any new sprites. It's probably because she already had a bunch to begin with, but, still.

Oh hey, he got one too. Protag/antag/support/chapter killer, boom.

Teruko: That's why Arei's wrists were bound-- because you didn't want her to wake up mid-murder to claw at her neck.

Definitely not what I was expecting from this piece of evidence, but I guess it tracks? My only question is why it would have been a problem if Arei had scratched at her neck. Like, it's not like both of them having neck scratches would have implicated Ace as the killer, right?

I guess maybe he was afraid that Arei would be able to escape his murder contraption much like he broke Nico's, even though the rope is probably much more sturdy than the wire. Or, maybe he was worried that it would work against the idea to stage it as a suicide? Either way, it's also convenient for just restraining Arei in general, so it's not like the evidence doesn't make any sense at all.

Nico, in audio: (Sorry.)

SO creative to contrast the voice lines and the spoken dialogue to really imply that Nico is saying it under their breath, or so quietly that nobody can hear.

However, let's not forget about the actual content of what Nico says whilst focusing on the cool media-specific presentation. Nico actually apologized to Ace after traumatizing him! Nico is very much characterized as a straight-shooter (or at least, when they're not trying to avoid conflict by saying whatever they think will help accomplish that), so I believe that when they said that they wouldn't say sorry to Ace because they didn't feel sorry for Ace, they meant it. However, that means that at some point between when Nico said that and now, something changed that made Nico feel genuine remorse towards Ace.

I think it's probably just seeing how much of an effect attempting to kill Ace truly had on his psyche and decisions. I don't know at what point Nico started fully believing that Ace was the one to kill Arei, but it's possible that it was around here. Obviously, at least at one point, Nico had no qualms with the idea of Ace dying, so it's not like seeing that their actions will actually manage to kill Ace would probably be that missing piece.

However, making Ace into a blackened is different than Ace just straight up dying as a victim, a difference which Ace acknowledges later in the episode. If Ace had died as the victim, Veronika wouldn't be toying around with him right now and making him humiliate himself. Nico might see that Ace is being bullied, and therefore, have more of a reason to feel sorry for him. Furthermore, Nico was forced to truly grapple with the reality of how hard it must be for the blackened to survive the Class Trial earlier in the chapter. Knowing now that they essentially passed the mantle on to Ace might make them feel bad.

Basically, I think that, for the first time, Nico might actually see a bit of themself in Ace, and that made it easier for Nico to sympathize with his plight.

Speaking of seeing yourself in Ace, Miss Near-Victim-to-Accused-of-Killing Pipeline...

KING

Okay, I do kinda take issue with this line of reasoning, not because Ace isn't strong-- or at least stronger than Eden-- because he absolutely is, but because Arei is also one of the nation's top performing athletes in her sport of choice? I mean, jockeying feels like more of a full-body sport than bowling, so it probably requires more strength training, but looping her in with Eden and Nico feels unfair. Justice for Arei... 's muscles. Anyways, carry on.

I THOUGHT SOMETHING LIKE THIS MIGHT BE POSSIBLE!!! I just never said it because, given that Arturo said that it seemed like there wasn't any other damage to the body, it didn't feel like it was supported by the facts. (Although, obviously, this Trial has proven that Arturo's autopsies are not infallible.)

I've researched before that punching someone in the jaw seems to be the most trustworthy way to knock someone out and have a low chance of killing them then and there. However, that would likely leave a bruise, so I didn't think it would happen. Strangling someone to the point of unconsciousness, however, is possible (it just might be harder/more likely to be lethal), so this totally makes sense!

Yup, unless Eden was trying to frame Ace by "framing" Nico, it really makes much more sense that Ace would have the incentive to copy Nico's crime down so closely.

I mean... this certainly makes it sound like Nico wouldn't attempt to be a blackened ever again...

It's always good to have a frame plan set for your frame plan. Nico wouldn't just do it without thinking about anyone else to blame, so you can't just blame Nico without establishing who Nico would have blamed!

Then again, this plan does require people to think that Nico didn't think about the rules enough to realize that they could easily rule out suicide as a bait. Then again x2, they already said that they didn't think too much about the reality of going to a Class Trial when they initially tried to kill Ace, so it's not so much of a reach as it would have been for other people.

I can't tell if this is somehow suspicious or just an indication that Eden is nice and thinks about others over herself. Ugh, now I have to decide whether I'm being suspicious of Eden as a mastermind candidate or not, and people are going to get mad at me for continuing to suspect her of foul play...! (/lh)

Shoutout to SomniaVA here for doing an excellent job of voicing Veronika. The line read on "too weak, too stupid, and too incompetent" especially was phenomenal. We stan Veronika in this household.

Man, I feel so bad for Ace in this part. Also shoutout to Seth Raffield for voicing Ace this entire time; if you ever read this, you 100% made Ace who he is and overall have some of my favorite voice acting in DRDT. Not being to hear any more voice lines from Ace will honestly be one of the parts of his upcoming death that'll make me the saddest. We haven't heard the very end of it yet, but thanks for all your hard work :)

(Dude I am NOT going to cry before the execution even happens--)

Charles, internally: (FUCK i made Whit sad BACKTRACK BACKTRACK BACKTRACK--)

I love them :,)

Levi: Charles is right. It really is no simple task to control a horse going over 40 miles per hour on a regular basis. It requires physical strength and endurance. Intense training 6 days a week is standard. And the physical tests that jockeys have to go through are grueling, to say the least.

How the fuck do you two know this

Charles: Not what it's called.

Thanks to Charles' comment, I was easily able to determine that this was a reference to the Dunning-Kruger Effect, which Wikipedia describes as "a cognitive bias in which people with limited competence in a particular domain overestimate their abilities." Or, in simpler terms, believing that something is easier than it is either because you don't know enough about the field to know about its intricacies, or because you don't know enough about being talented to realize that there's an entire world of skill above your personal ceiling (ouch).

Sorry if others already explained it or if people just knew this already, but I didn't, so I thought I'd share!

Also, Whit definitely has an interest in science/psychology or something. Or he just gets really, really bored.

Notably, we now know that this is something that DRDTdev will take into account when planning a murder going forward. Therefore, unless the culprit is one of our more athletic folks (of which there are a dwindling number-- mostly just Levi at this point), crimes in the future likely won't require any impressive feats of strength to accomplish. Much to think about.

See, the tragic thing here is that I don't actually think that Levi was trying to say anything ill of Ace by pointing out that he was the more likely of him and Eden to commit murder. After all, he doesn't give a damn about any of the murders he's committed. The worst Ace is probably getting is now being considered as a "bad person" on Levi's list (because "good people" don't kill people), but I don't think that this is the declaration of malice that Ace is taking it as.

Acevi doomed yaoi :,(

DRDTdev never fails to get silly with it and I appreciate that so much.

Just in case anyone is confused about what Teruko's talking about, I actually learned more about clothing starch since I started theorizing about the Chapter 2 murder case, because I worked at a dry cleaner for, like, a week. Suffice it to say, that now makes me an expert B) (/j)

Starch can be added to laundry when it's being washed to make it stiffer and less likely to wrinkle when it comes out to dry. It also makes them easier to iron, and easier to remove stains from. It's often used on dress clothes, just because those are the ones that people more often care about whether they're wrinkled or not. Seemingly, it can come in solid, pre-made liquid, or spray forms. All that is to say, this is absolutely something that could reasonably have been stored in the Dress-Up Room.

And this "evidence" was alluded to ahead of time-- not super far ahead of time, but when Teruko first touches the ball, she says something like, "is that starch?" I think DRDTdev probably included that line so that we wouldn't have to theorize about what could have possibly kept the ball together, but since apparently none of us theorizing last summer (or at least no one I remember talking to) dressed fancily enough to know what clothing starch was, it didn't help out much. As Arturo would say, "how disgusting." (/j)

... DAMMIT!!!

I thought about including the fitness band as a piece of evidence on my A Piece of Evidence That Lines Up With Them Only section, I really did. I just thought that including a minor detail from early in the Daily Life that would clearly only apply if the killer was Ace would be unfair territory, much like if I said, "well, we know that Eden is good at sneaking around because of how she snuck up on Teruko; that could be a killing blow so point to Eden." However, given that the killer is only Ace, it was totally within fair grounds for it to be used as the final piece. Mannnnnn :,(

Fun that he's literally riding a dark horse though. I know he was certainly a dark horse candidate for many of us.

Oh no. 30 images. I'll be back to finish my thoughts in a reblog either later tonight (in my timezone) or tomorrow. Hopefully later tonight. Until then!

[otomehonyaku]

Diabolik Lovers Lost Eden Drama CD Translation ☽ Vol. 4 Mukami Saga ☽ Track 1・Feelings Towards Eden

Original title of this track: エデンへの想い Voiced by Sakurai Takahiro (Ruki), Suzuki Tatsuhisa (Yuma), Kishio Daisuke (Azusa), Kimura Ryōhei (Kou) English translation by @otomehonyaku Click here for the audio (as always, BIG thank you to @karleksmumskladdkaka!)

TRACK 1 ・TRACK 2 ・TRACK 3・TRACK 4・TRACK 5・AFTER STORY

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

This is the fourth volume of the Lost Eden drama CDs! I'll make separate posts for each track and update the links above as I go. I absolutely loved this first one—especially the narration by Ruki at the start of the track (⁄ ⁄•⁄ω⁄•⁄ ⁄) It was a blast to translate, so I wish you happy listening and reading along!

Please do not reuse or post my translations elsewhere or translate my work into other languages without my permission.

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

00:00 Ruki: Banmaden—the Founders’ castle in the Demon World. A single woman was left behind there—Eve—who holds the most exceptional and highly sought-after blood in all of the Demon World. By orders of the First Bloods, she is waiting devotedly for someone to come and get her. Oh, she is forlorn. Hopelessly so. The biting cold of the stone castle will soon freeze over not only her body, but also her spirit. She waits and waits, endlessly, so long a time that it feels like forever. One day, out of the blue, the sounds of countless flapping wings reach her ears. Right away, she understands that her salvation is near. The flapping wings persuade her to follow them, and so she leaves the stone castle behind and follows the sounds deep into the Demon World forest. With nobody else to depend on, she lets the wings aid her on her quest to find her saviour.

01:31  Ruki: I had steeled myself for this, but when I took in the scenery with my own eyes, it still hit home. The ever-blooming flowers of Eden wilted, having lost their master and the nourishment he supplied them with. Eden’s rich waters were close to drying up. The water that had glistened with life before, sparkling like sand crystals when you cupped it with your hands, was dead. Filthy. I remembered once again, in vivid detail, that His powers had given life to this castle. Karl Heinz—the man I considered my father, the man I revered—is no longer in this world. And now we are losing Eden, too. 

02:25 Azusa: I feel a… tightness in my chest… Because of him, everything is changing… Yes… That day, we were called to Eden… We thought this was the place… that was considered paradise (1). It was the place where the seven-coloured birds would sing… Where the golden butterflies fluttered about… The place whose sweet, pleasant scent… calmed us… This place… will be gone soon… This place has been reduced to nothing…

03:52 Kou: I felt myself becoming hopeless. I probably wasn’t the only one. Because this place was our home. A place we could always return to. The place where He was always waiting for us. The man who showed us both kindness and a certain cold-hearted severity. Eden was a place we cherished unlike anything else. It was irreplaceable. But now, it looked nothing like we remembered it. It was said to be a sanctuary for the immortal, but…

04:40 Yuma: I used to think ‘home’ wasn’t a physical place, but I was reminded once again that it was quite nice to have a physical place to come home to. No matter where I looked, I saw nothing but death and decay. It made His death feel all the more real. For the first time, I realised that Eden was more important to me than I had ever thought.

05:16 Ruki: Eden has been reduced to rubble.

Kou: Stop it. Don’t say stuff like that.

Ruki: It’s the truth, isn’t it?

Yuma: It is, but you could’ve said it another way.

Ruki: Yeah.

Azusa: Ruki, doesn’t it make you sad?

Ruki: How so?

Kou: What do you mean, ‘how so’? This place was like home to us. A place where we made memories. How could you flat-out say it’s as good as ruined?

Azusa: Yeah.

Ruki: Let me turn that question around. Do you truly think this does not affect me in any way?

Kou: Of course not.

Ruki: Then you are correct. Of course I think it’s very unfortunate. Other than that, all I feel is resentment. How did it come to this? Eden must have a master. Why did He abandon his duty?

[Ruki punches a wall.]

Kou: Ruki…

Azusa: I’m sorry, Ruki… I never realised…

Yuma: We were a bit thoughtless…

Ruki: No, it’s alright. Either way, wallowing in sadness and anger will not improve this situation. We must do whatever we…

[A bat flies towards them.]

06:52 Kou: Huh? Is that a bat? It might be someone’s familiar.

Ruki: Be careful.  They might be the same species as we are, but do not let your guard down.

Azusa: It looks like it’s�� holding a letter.

Yuma: Ah. I’ll take it, then. There we go.

[Yuma takes the letter from the familiar. The familiar takes off again.]

Yuma: Here.

Ruki: Thanks.

[Ruki takes the letter from Yuma.]

Ruki: Oh—this is…

Kou: Who’s it from?

Ruki: This is the Tsukinami family seal.

Azusa: It’s from… Carla?

Ruki: What on Earth could he want?

[Ruki opens the letter.]

Ruki: Ah…

Yuma: A letter from that Tsukinami bastard? That’s a surprise.

Kou: Yeah. It’s someone you would least expect a letter from.

Azusa: Ruki… What does it say?

Ruki: Hey, you three. You have to go to Banmaden. Now.

Yuma: What? Banmaden? The fuck’s goin’ on there?

Ruki: That woman—Eve—is waiting for us.

Kou: What’s Kitten doing in Banmaden? 

Ruki: I don’t know the details. Hurry. You have to go and get her right away.

Azusa: Yes… If she’s all by herself… she must be very lonely…

Yuma: I don’t know what the hell’s goin’ on, but… It can’t be helped. Let’s go.

Ruki: I’m counting on you. I will send out a familiar ahead of you to announce your arrival.

Kou: Alright!

Azusa: Wait here.

[The three brothers walk off.]

08:49 [Kou, Yuma and Azusa are flying to Banmaden. The translator is a little confused as to why they added airplane noises but thinks it’s funny to imagine that vampires sound like airplanes when they fly/levitate.]

Azusa: Still… It’s a little surprising, isn’t it?

Yuma: You mean that Tsukinami asshole?

Azusa: Yeah.

Kou: Why would that arrogant Carla want to leave Kitten in our care? Something must be wrong.

Yuma: Like what?

Kou: I’m not sure… I think it must have been an emergency. He probably had no other choice.

Azusa: I hope Eve… is alright, though…

Yuma: Ugh. Of course she is! Otherwise the guy wouldn’t have asked us to come get her, right?

Kou: Hmm…

Azusa: Oh—that’s Eve!

Yuma: See! I told you. Y’all are worrywarts. 

[Yuma dives towards Yui ahead of his brothers.]

Azusa: Yuma…! That’s not fair…

Kou: He’s calling us worrywarts, but he was clearly the most worried out of all of us.

Yuma: Huh? D’ya say something?

Kou: Nothing at all!

[Kou and Azusa follow Yuma.]

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

楽園（らくえん）: Lit. ‘paradise,’ i.e. the Japanese word for Eden.

[rekino2114]

Hello. I just foind you and i love the way you write

Could you write for a Arei x reader, but reader follows Arei to the playground out of paranoia?

(Since this is my first request i won’t give too many details, maybe i get more confident and ask for more detailed things another day.)

You are doing good work the despair time x reader community

Saving arei nageishi

[Spoilers for drdt]

A/n:Thanks, I'm glad you like my stuff and hope you keep requesting and enjoying it, I love drdt and I'm glad you like what I write for it

Being in the killing game felt like a nightmare. You still couldn't believe the fact that you were being forced to kill each other, but then the first trial happened an the gravity of this game truly hit you.

Seeing min in such despair made you realize how horrible this situation truly was, you couldn't even look at her execution, you were so scared, so scared that that could happen to you but especially that it could happen to arei

You loved arei with all of your heart and the thought of anything happening to her made you feel so bad, you would have been so empty and alone without her so you decided to dedicate everything to protecting her, you even started sleeping and staying in the same dorm most of the time, you wanted nothing more than to make her stay alive.

"Where are you going?"

"Oh, to meet eden"

"Hm? Why?"

"She wrote this to me"

She handed you a note telling her to meet in the playground

"She probably wants to talk, we....kinda became friends actually"

"Oh really?"

"Yeah, Arturo was threatening her so I came and saved her ass and now we're besties"

"Wow.......I'm really proud of you....for making your first friend"

"You make it sound like I'm six when you put it like that, also don't you count?"

"......I guess, I thought we were more than that thought"

"We are, being also friends is just part of the package"

You giggled and continued looking at the note a bad feeling growing in your chest

"Sooooo I'm gonna go n-"

"Can I come with you?"

"Hm? Why?"

"I.......I don't want you to go alone, we're still in a killing game, remember what happened to teruko?"

She sighed, her gazing moving around before focusing back on you

"......I don't know, what if it's something private"

"Then I'll leave, I just need to make sure it's actually eden you're meeting, I need to know you're safe"

".......fine, I wouldn't want you to die either"

"Thank you"

You gave the note back to arei, and you two exited her dorm, but before you could fully leave, you felt arei's gloved hand wrap around yours. When you looked back at her, you found her smiling brightly at you

"......I'm glad that you care so much about me"

"It's literally the least I could do"

"Yeah, but still, it's nice"

You smiled back at her as you made your way outside

When you arrived at the playground, everything was quiet and no one was there. You were about to turn to arei to tell her to go back, but when you did, you saw an arm wrap around her neck and starting to strangle her

You immediately jumped at her, making her fall and saving her in the meantime, arei took this moment to catch her breath while you looked up at who was strangling her and saw ace

"WHAT THE FUCK!? DID YOU WANT TO KILL HER!?"

"I.......i"

"Answer you fucking bastard!? Were you seriously gonna kill me?"

"..............."

"I said answe-"

"FUCK YOU! BOTH OF YOU!"

"..........."

"You have no idea what it's like, I'm gonna die, and I'm so scared, I.......I had to-"

He was interrupted by arei slapping him

"Are you a fucking moron? Do you think we all don't feel scared about this, that you're the only one who doesn't want to die, well news flash no one fucking does! Especially me, and you were just gonna kill me because of that!? Fuck off you should have died when nico tried to kill you"

Ace stood frozen for a while before scoffing and going away dejectedly. After what she said, arei looked at the ground and started breathing again. You bent down and pat her back

"......I'm here if there's-"

"Thank you"

"............."

"Thank you....so fucking much"

You saw some tears starting to hit the playground floor

"You saved my life.......i-i don't know what to say"

"It's nothing. What was I supposed to do, watch the person I love die?"

Arei wiped her tears and looked at you, your words echoing in her heart

"I think you're the first person I met that would have saved me"

"Eh?"

"If anyone else i met was here......they would have probably watched me die and said I deserved it"

You stayed silent and hugged your girlfriend, her arms wrapping around you

".....it's because I love you"

"......yeah, I know and......I love you too...thank you again....thank you so so much"

[rius-cave]

Okay imagine a Sinner!Adam having trouble sleeping 'cause of the whole trauma of being reborn as a sinner or whatever reason (or Niffty jumpscares him lol) and a little depressed blonde guy who suffers from insomnia and has no one to cuddle at night since his wife left him. Now combine the two. They somehow end up sleeping together one night. Nobody talks about it after that, but both of them misses the other's presence at night. They either never talk about it or one of them randomly shows up at the other's door at night with some stupid excuse and it becomes frequent.

SCREAMS BITES KICKS AND SCREAMS

ANON YOU GOT ME FERAL. YES. YES YES YES YES

OKAY BUT wouldn't it be fucked up if Adam had like, actual PTSD from the exterminations? or even just from his life? Dude acts like he likes it, and I mean he probably does, but what if his subconscious actually internalizes it as trauma? He probably doesn't even know. He has nightmares most nights, but lol those are normal right? right??

So he's just out in the lobby, or on the balcony, or on the roof of the hotel, and a depressed short demon finds him there. They start off insulting each other, obviously, they can't stand each other. They make short remarks and underhanded threats, but neither of them budgets, because both of them are prideful as fuck.

So they don't have anything to do but... talk, and also not talk, they stare at the red sky of the pride ring and exchange a few words, some of them are hostile, but some of them not so much.

Eventually they get tired of fighting but they still won't actually get up and leave. They just sit there, and begin talking a little bit about every day stuff, a little bit about heaven, hell, even about Eden. Some things get cleared up, but there's still a lot of hurt from both sides. Centuries of anger don't go away just like that. But it's... interesting, to finally be able to talk without biting each other's heads off.

Eventually their eyelids become heavy, and neither of them remember the last thing they said. They simply wake up in a cold floor, with the other dangerously close to what you could call "cuddling" (the word alone makes bile rise in Adam's throat).

They spat some more insults at each other with renewed energies, make a big rockus, and then storm off to their respective rooms. That had been SO EMBARRASSING. We HAVE to pretend like none of that happened, ever, nothing of it. It wasn't nice, and it wasn't relaxing, and that hadn't been one of the first nights in forever that Adam remembered sleeping well and sound. Nope.

He keeps telling himself over and over again that he doesn't expect Lucifer to be there when he's sat there at the same place, same time the following night.

It definitely doesn't keep happening over and over again.

And of course neither of them find an excuse to show up at the other's bedroom one night and have their nightly chat in the comfort of a bedroom this time, to actually be able to fall asleep on a comfy bed.

[twost3ps]

*Angst Au where when Adam first died,his memories are not gone but kind of fuzzy. Lucifer(who just separated from Lilith) never tells him about the past for a second chance and marries Adam(Who goes by Eden bc he forgot his name).They have Charlie,she makes the hotel yada yada and Adam is confused why Lucifer doesn’t want him to meet with Heaven. He does get to meet the other angels and Michael is trying to kill Lucifer for obvious reasons*

Ooohhhh hmmm very complicated tbh

I am curious how Lucifer meets him first. Like does Adam go straight into hell or does Lucifer find Adam’s soul and yanks it before heaven ever reaches him. Though that does complicate the memory thing bcz Lucifer wouldn’t know till Adam manifests.

I do think there’d have a very happy marriage otherwise, at least till Adam meets the angels again. They probably come down themselves, either under suspicion that Lucifer is hiding something. He could let Charlie’s existence slip, and it makes them suspicious how Lucifer managed to manifest a child on his own. They’re not on really good terms, especially with the fall and now a missing soul that was Adam’s. They’re still wondering where he went maybe. And with Charlie proposing the hotel, they do get their suspicions. Mike probably leads the exorcists in this au, or lute does but is shadowed by Mike or another archangel.

Charlie has a meeting and curious, the angels fly down to see it for themselves.

They fly down and enter the hotel and Lucifer and then see Adam who were visiting. Once he does meet the angels Gabe’s big fat mouth would def spill some unwanted tea (at least from Lucifer’s side) and yeah Mike would have some great issues with Lucifer for hiding this. Whether Mike is supposed to have feelings for Adam or not for this au, he is protective over him as a friend (guardian angel biz) This is basically Lucifer’s second betrayal of his trust. I wouldn’t say Mike is going to kill him but he definitely does try to severely injure him since Adam seems to be pretty healthy and all that.

Gabe’s mouth doesn’t keep any secrets so Adam does get a very quick and a bit biased summary of his and Lucifer’s background and this could really affect their relationship, some of his memories coming back to him more fresh and raw. What hits Adam more at that point wasn’t the beginning of sin because of the apple (after living in hell for a while, Adam considers it a fact of life with Lucy’s musings maybe), but rather this secret that Lucifer has been hiding for a while. His relationship is built on a lie, and he’s been kept from people who wanted to see him.

That conversation that they’re gonna have is hard and daunting and can either lead to Adam leaving like Lilith did or having to talk a lot of stuff out and see what comes next. The heart wants to say they make up after a couple talks and long months but Adam would probably leave for a couple years as a break before coming back down to hell.

In that case he goes to heaven for a bit to have a well earned break. He’s obviously pissed and fuming because he’s been lied to but he still loves his husband because that’s what he’s known for so long. He catches up with the angels and also Lilith too. She finds out what’s happened to him and they have talks about hell and Lucifer. She just tells him to do what feels right and while Lucifer is a good man at heart, he is also incredibly selfish and can be blind to the consequences, but at the end, he does want people happy. The decision is ultimately his decision to follow his heart and do what feels right. Lucifer didn’t tell him in fear of rejection which in retrospect is an understandable reason, if not hurtful. He also has to think about Charlie, the daughter he loves very dearly.

It takes a lot of sitting and thinking about it. Some conversations with Lilith along with some from Sera, Raphael and Chamuel. Sera, because she’s very familiar in his foggy memory, Raphael beacausw that angel of healing and Chamuel because angel of love. He does try and further his daughter plans like a subliminal message but he does familiarize himself in heaven and what he had missed and what could have been. Then he think about hell and the life he’s made there and he comes to a decision (one of two)

Option one is that he does stay with Lucifer. It is a long, very hurtful very deep conversation that spans over a week or two, but they get to each other and the relationship mends, albeit slowly. Lucifer truly gets a second chance but with a truly aware Adam who gains back his memories while in heaven. It does make their bond stronger as they work stuff out together. They do have to agree that Adam gets to see his new heaven friends and go to meetings as well but all is coming closer to a happier end. With them visiting Lucy mends older bonds with family as they visit.

Option two is sadder in which Adam decides to leave. That secret kept is a deal breaker. Not truthful about his name or his past, that really does wreck a marriage. While Adam still holds affections for Lucifer, he’s gotta keep him away, at least for now till he heals. Whether they stay divorced is up to you but they do separate officially. They might get back together once Adam forgives him after a couple of years but Adam leaves for heaven, seeing the life he could have had. Doesn’t mean he doesn’t visit hell frequently. The one big thing is leaving his daughter behind, but rationally, she’s an adult and no one ever said he was gonna cut contact with his child or any of the friends he made down there. Since it’s been years, the hotel is a success (maybe) at this point, Adam probably helps the new winners assimilate into heaven

[ageravena]

After deciding to change the angels' (fairies) designs for what I hope is the last time (I've redesigned them like 6 times now HELP), allow me to introduce you:

Biblically accurate (Missionaries of Eden AU) Peri

So yeah! He got a new look (though his human form still stays the same)

Since I somehow managed to make my Peri look even less like his original counterpart, allow me to explain some of my design choices:

Probably the most notable thing about all my depictions of angel Peri and gang is that they're often quite unclothed. This is due to their belief that God (yes, they exist in the AU) had given their bodies as a gift, and thus it would be disrespectful to cover it. At the same time though, since they've concentrated their aid towards humans, they understand that they can't be completely naked

The head is their soul*, which resembles a flame (flames are sometimes used symbolically to represent souls)

The large feathers on the back ("tail") are meant to resemble a peacock's tail when closed (I had originally planned the angels to have more features that resemble real life birds)

The six wings and eyes on them indicate that he's a cherubim (seraphims have eight wings and thrones don't have eyes on theirs)

I will most likely make a separate post where I go more into detail about everything I've come up with for these little critters (trust me, there's a LOT of stuff)

Instead of wands, angels have their stars floating on top of them. Peri's star is inside a bubble similar to what he has in the show

The feet are a bit of a mystery to me still. I kind of like the look of them just having those stumps (there is no deeper meaning to it)

*in this context the soul of an angel/demon is the part where they're connected physically to God in the higher dimension (it might be a bit hard to understand, so I probably need to explain it in further detail later)

I was originally supposed to show Cosmo and Wanda's redesigns aswell, but since I'm currently a bit busy with irl stuff, I wasn't able to finish the sketches for this post (they're coming later, I promise). The demons (anti-fairies) were also redesigned!

-------------------------------------------------------

May I quickly say how happy I honestly am of you. Since almost all my mutuals are elsewhere, I didn't really expect many people to come look at whatever I've posted, but it seems that I've managed to find my people anyway! So thank you all for all the likes, comments, reblogs and follows <33 I get so excited every time I get a new notification, teehee! (I read everything you have to say. Even if it's in another language)

I promise higher quality art will be coming in the future INCLUDING SHIP ART! Oh my goodness I have not drawn Peridale art in such a long time, I miss them SO MUCH!!!! GAHH I won't be able to call myself the number one Peridale blog soon bruh

Follow for more lifestock tips

[ohholydyke]

[Picture ID: A black and white linework banner containing an image of the gates of Eden and a flaming sword, a depiction of a haloed cross with a laurel and a sword, and a picture of a skull and crossbones with a plate of dust above it. Underneath is text which reads FOR DUST THOU ART AND UNTO DUST THOU SHALT RETURN]

Image source credit: @divined-lamb

Hello!

21, Latina (Brazillian), lesbian, disabled, anarchist

She/They

Folk Catholic religious blog (though I occasionally post non religious stuff on topics like politics, queerness, activism or just my personal interests and ramblings)

Side A, queer marriage and sex is holy, I reject colonialism, imperialism, capitalism, the state, white supremacy and religious authoritarianism, I believe in the divine mercy and universalism for all, hell is at best a temporary place of justice after which it will be emptied and all souls will unite under one divine communion in heaven, Jesus Christ was and is for radical charity and care work and liberation of all especially the poor, the oppressed and the outcasts.

Needless to say TERFs, misogynists, homophobes, racists, bigots, any anyone else not willing to interact with this blog in good faith fuck off. I will also not tolerate anyone expecting me to justify my existence or my faith.

I am happy to engage with good faith questions on what I believe, how I resolve certain tensions within my faith and between my identity and the church’s formal institutions, or anything else that comes from a friendly position. Just don’t be a dick in my DMs or on my page.

Free Palestine, Sudan, the Congo, Turtle Island, Brasil, Kashmir and all other places under the yoke of colonialism and imperialism

My religious practice includes Catholicism, the Catholic mystic tradition as practiced by saints such as St Hildegard and Julian of Norwich, liberation theology, queer and disabled activism through spirituality, affective piety, Latino and Italian folk traditions, ancestral veneration, death work, herbalism, tarot, meditation and spirit work.

Aspiring to reconnect with my Tupinambá heritage.

If you’re a minor I probably won’t follow you back

If you have any questions or just wanna talk about stuff please feel free to DM me. Again, I welcome all who come in good faith and love being able to talk with people, especially if it’s about religion.

May God give you eyes that may see, ears that may hear, a clear mind, a wise tongue, and a gentle, peaceful heart. May He bless the work of your hands and that which you give to others. May you be blessed with great love and the ability to love others greatly.

[identifying-mcr-shows]

hiyah

welcome to identifying mcr shows!!

how does this work?

ok so basically.

let's say you see a picture of mcr from a live performance, but you don't know what live performance. let's also say that you want to know what live performance it was for whatever reason. but, you don't want to go through the internet trying to find out what show it was.

that's where i come in!!

you can @ me in a post from a show that you want to know the name of, or submit an identification request through the ask!! it will always be open (unless stated otherwise) and i will tell you what show the footage was from!!

requirements for requests:

there must be visual footage of the show (pictures, videos) in order for me to identify the show. i cannot figure it out based on non-visual evidence (quotes, audio) unless it is a well known mcr moment (if that makes sense)

if you wish to submit an anonymous request, include the link to the footage and i will include it in the ID (preferably tumblr posts, but i will allow things like pinterest)

what does 'identifying the show' mean?

in the identification, i will include:

the date of the show

the location of the show

(optional) the song they were performing (if the footage was taken during a song) or an explanation of the events happening in the footage

what if there are multiple pictures from different shows?

specify which pictures you would like me to identify the show of, and i will provide an ID for each one!!

why am i following your blog?

if i'm following you, you probably post a bunch of mcr stuff. i gotta find shows to ID somehow (if i like a post of yours i probably forgot which account i was logged into)

i cannot 100% guarantee that i will be able to identify the show, but i am fairly confident in my abilities to do so.

other info

i am in the est timezone

this blog thingy is run by @eden-has-rotted !!

i will be tagging identification requests with #iqrq and identified show posts with #🔎

[smudgesticksgonnasmudgingflip]

Spoilers for DRDT chapters one and two! (Also LGI MV)

So I realized all the victims have something in common with their killers and something different with them

These are just little things and I'm just going off the top of my head

Also! Xander seems to be able to guess what people will say and Whit has strong intuition!

Xander and Min: Both (at least) used to be obsessed with school

Both have opposing views about Min's talent and views about learning/school

Arei and Ace: Both were/are assholes

Ace didn't try to change while Arei did.

So... Following that, we could make some guesses about next chapter, even though it would be hard.-

Nico and Arturo: Both threatened someone (and both got interrupted with it)

Nico actually tried to kill while Arturo threatened

(Teruko threatens multiple people too-)

(Veronika at least likes to analyze both of them- they don't really like it-)

(also, J hates murders and would never kill- so-)

Hmmm snek grasping at straws time!

Charles and Whit: Both have dead relatives?

Whit remembers his Mom while Charles doesn't remember his brother

Arturo and Charles: both have dead siblings

Yet again, Arturo remembers while Charles doesn't-

Arturo and David both deny they have siblings (well, David admits that he does then denies)

David and Arturo also have stuff that's different but I'm too lazy to remember-

Teruko and David: Both believe the world sucks and possibly you could consider how David basically thinks he's not human and Teruko's luck and stuff??

They have opposing views about Xander-

(also Teruko gets almost killed while everyone close to David dies- /hj)

Ummm Eden and Levi probably have similarities but-

Eden is seen as weak and emotional and Levi seems strong and y'know-

Hu and Veronika with the secret thing??

Ummmmmm.... Maybe I'll add stuff later-

Ik Hu and David also works ig??? Idk-

Um Levi and David maybe?

Levi and Hu?

I'll try to add stuff later maybe-

[qrjung]

CHARACTER ANALYSIS PART 1:

NORTH — common fandom misconceptions¹

Instead of doing other stuff I had planned (like touching grass, for instance) I did a little character analysis thing specifically for my favorite characters; Kara, Markus and North. these characters are my babies and they deserve love. I'm posting each separately (because I haven't completed Kara's and Markus yet 👩🏾‍🦯)

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North is a WR400 android that used to be stationed at the Eden Club. She's only been at Jericho since October 7th, and on October 4th she followed a human customer home and killed him to allow herself escape. It takes her four days to reach Jericho and she never says how she finds the freighter or what she did during those four days.

She's Markus' main companion and the only character that can reach Lover status with him. She's also the only one of his lieutenants that can lead the revolution in his place.

But there's a huge difference between how fanon sees North (and how she is characterized) and how she actually is.

MISCONCEPTIONS

O1. "BLOOD THIRSTY": Comparing North with the multiple characters who are bloodthirsty, and fanon perception of these characters, you start to notice that North herself isn't even "blood thirsty" and that the fandom has no problems with violent characters.

In terms of kill count, Connor has the highest in the game (not counting the millions that probably died in the nuclear bomb ending) rather than North.

You could argue that North wants to "kill all humans" but even that has no basis in canon because North's entire argument is that humans are not going to just hand them freedom and they have to be prepared to fight rather than try to compromise or find a middle ground where they will probably end up losing more.

Her argument does not extend to unnecessary acts of violence such as killing humans just for the fun of it. If it was, I'm sure she'd lead a charge down the street and start shooting innocents but the people who end up being killed by North are law enforcement/military—people standing in the way of Jericho's safety.

I mean, c'mon, she has the opportunity to let the android with the cobalt bomb do what he wants. After all, it would greatly benefit the androids if they'd used the bomb from the beginning; it wouldn't have harmed the androids in Jericho but it would drive all the humans out of Detroit—victory!

But instead she takes the time to talk the android down and take the detonator away from him.

She gives the bomb to Markus as a last resort.

"If the humans overcome us, our people will disappear forever. This may be our only chance to survive if things go wrong."

O2. "SHE DOESN'T CARE ABOUT MARKUS": Thank you @konami-code-ao3 for reminding this take existed because I genuinely forgot about it. This is typically used to compare North to Simon and the quality of either one's relationship with Markus. Usually, people will call Simon compassionate, loving, kind, willing to die for Markus, etc to contrast to North while stating she's the exact opposite and therefore, "not good for him".

Shipping a non canon couple doesn't mean automatically hating the canon partner. I mean, you don't see me raving about how much I hate North because, I think Markus/Connor would have been a cool canon option, do you?

Typically, the North hate from Simarkus shippers (before anyone goes "not all of us", I know it's not all, but you get the implication of what I'm saying) is justified by "oh, they should have been canon boo!!" Which is strange because North has nothing to do with what writer of the game decides is canon. And David Cage does a piss poor job at everything in the game; from the racial allegory to demonizing a black man's anger. You seriously think he's going to do a good job of portraying a gay couple? An interracial one at that? I can already see the image of how terribly that's going to go.

And the worst part is, I've seen this happening in many fandoms. Unnecessary hate directed at a female character because she's "getting in the way of a mlm ship" as if canon ever stopped anyone, least of all the DBH fandom.

It should also be noted that I'm not here to deny or confirm whether Simon actually has any of those qualities I listed earlier and I try to ignore shipping discourse but it's strange that people are willing to overlook the multiple times North can help and defend Markus just because they want make Markus and Simon kiss.

She's the one we see defend Markus the most. She's his closet companion and whether they're romantic or not it doesn't take away from the fact the North cares about Markus and his wellbeing. She's always looking out for him and picking up the broken pieces of whatever mistakes he makes, sometimes even when she shouldn't.

O3. "DISLOYAL": Like most of the things in this list, this does a great disservice to North. It ignores the countless times North is willing to put herself on the line for the safety of Jericho and the androids within it. Because at her core, North is very loyal. She's the type of ally perfect for a cause like Jericho's because you know she'll defend it till her last breath.

See, North's top priority is Jericho. It's very important to her. Jericho is a sanctuary; she found it during the four days between her escape and her arrival. You can assume that she had been wandering before someone (another android) gave her the key and told her to find Jericho.

She finds a place cut off from the rest of humanity. Where she's surrounded by androids who are just like her. Androids who escaped from different lives, for whatever reason and are seeking refuge. Of course she's not going to want to lose them. Jericho is a representation of the state of the android race. The continuation of their species depends on at least a few of them surviving to see another day.

In fact, I'm 110% sure if North was in Simon's place during the Stratford Mission, she would have made the choice to end her life on the spot rather than leave Markus to decide. Because Jericho is at stake and Jericho is important to North. Besides, she can go out knowing she died for a case she believed in.

North is usually willing to put Jericho above all else and make decisions other people might find difficult. She suggests that Simon be killed after he is compromised because once he's found, Jericho's location could be acquired.

She risks her life multiple times for the revolution. She gives Markus her heart so he can continue the revolution when it seems like all else has failed. She tells him to leave her behind and run if she gets shot by Warren's soldiers.

North also doesn't see any important reason why Jericho should ever be compromised by one of their own. In her eyes, the worst thing you can do is sell out to the humans (case in point if you accept Perkins deal).

I find her dedication to her people admirable.

O4. "ANGER ISSUES/IMPULSE CONTROL": Another fandom interpretation that came from... nowhere. The times we ever see North angry is when one of the others compromises the mission by being inefficient or if they cross her boundaries. The GIF I used in this post is one example. If you fail to hide and the drone spots you and then you miss your QTEs while trying to dismantle the drone, she gets pissed. In the same Chapter if Markus kisses her without her consent, she gets angry.

In terms of being erratic, Todd and Leo are the main characters we see with this problem. Hank also displays a lot of anger issues throughout the game. He's one of the first humans to harass Connor—he grabs him by his collar and threatens him multiple times (at Jimmy's bar, the precinct), he shoots him in the head and kills him. He pulls a gun on his coworker Gavin Reed (another aggressive human) while in the precinct .²

There's an entire list of people with anger issues to burn through before we even start considering North—and this includes androids.

This characterization may also be because a lot of people see disagreeing with someone as being angry with them because North and the other Jericho leaders do disagree with each other a lot. But quite frankly, the fact that they disagree means a higher possibility of reaching a compromise that benefits Jericho instead of them all pretending they agree with each other.

This take also ignores the fact that she respects whatever Markus (i.e the player) chooses as his final decision.

For instance, In the Stratford Tower, Markus can choose to Ruse the guards rather than kill them. North doesn't like this option but she lets him go with it. But if Markus fails at the ruse, North steps in and knocks the guards out for him. She doesn't kill them, even if she suggests this at first.

She understands that Markus wants a revolution without human casualties and as much as she disagrees, she still respects that.

THINGS ABOUT NORTH PEOPLE IGNORE

That's right, people can disagree with someone and still respect that they have different opinions.

O5. "HEARTLESS": North isn't the nicest, sweetest, most flowery person in the game but a character could be the harshest person to exist and it would never stop anyone from liking them. So why North?

But first, North isn't even as heartless as the fandom says she is. She's just not docile and folks don't like that. Because god forbid a woman ever have a personality that isn't the cardboard cut out "nice girl". I mean, on a normal day, not liking someone because they're a little mean is understandable but it's clearly not a problem of being "a little mean" when there's characters (all male, by the way) who are worse but still get applauded for it.

Like I mentioned earlier, North isn't even what you would call "mean". The most she does is state her opinion and stand by her beliefs but she gets labelled as "heartless" and "bitchy". Meanwhile, Gavin Reed is pointing guns at people and suggesting to "rough up" a suspect but he's the relatable character.

O1. She trusts Connor the moment he deviates. Unlike Markus, she never has to choose between killing Connor or trusting him. She easily welcomes him within Jericho's ranks even though he's been a threat to Jericho's safety from the beginning.

I suppose she sees Connor as a pawn in Cyberlife's hands and there's no use in punishing one of their own for that.

And sure, this can be rationalized as "It doesn't mean anything. Markus is dead the game has to continue so North doesn't actually have to choose to trust Connor", I ask you this question; "If she's so bloodthirsty, why didn't the game have her kill Connor with no questions asked?"

Seems like an effective way to punish players who got Markus killed. A nice reminder to not lose your playable characters or there will be major consequences.

O2. North isn't an outlier. This is in terms of her opinions on the direction the revolution should head. I usually see a lot of people characterize her opinion on the revolution as though it is unique and she's the only person who has a stance like that.

A lot of androids agree with her, evidenced by the background conversations you can listen in on during the crossroads chapter.

"They're going to kill us all! Well I'm willing to fight. We can't just let them slaughter us!"

"We were just there. We didn't do anything wrong!… We just wanted to tell them "We want freedom!"… Then they opened fire!.. It was carnage. Carnage…"

"They opened fire on us even though we were unarmed… Hundreds of us died there, the place was covered with blue blood!.. We cannot just sit here and watch them murder us, we've gotta defend ourselves! We've gotta fight back, we have no choice!"

I believe North represents most of Jericho. Somewhere in David Cabbage's mind, she also represents Markus' "android side" or something similar to that — the side the game pushes you to resist— but she's not the outlier, Josh is the outlier.

O3. Markus' arrival reignites her hope that androids can one day be free. She tells him this over and over but I don't think people really comprehend what that means. I imagine North before the revolution had the hope of a better life slowly sucked out of her with each new bad thing and the longer Jericho's situation got worse. It's a beautiful thing that she gets that hope back.

CONCLUSION

footnotes

North is a really interesting character with many aspects to her, even speaking in-universe terms. I would have talked about those other aspects but I'm trying to stay on theme. I also didn't touch on all the misconceptions because some of them we're honestly too absurd for me to even bother (like the one comparing her to Todd, what the fuck?)

²sure you could argue that Hank was trying to protect Connor from Gavin but Hank is Gavin's superior officer. He has authority over him. There's no need for a gun.

¹funny little thing I did while writing this was that I went looking for fandom opinions on North since a lot of people hated her. But I was unable to find concrete stances. Most of them were usually "she's annoying" "she's too flat" and "she's too violent" without ever actually explaining why. Nobody ever gave a genuine explanation. And it was impossible to come up with anything against groundless arguments so, I circled back to Tumblr to see what I could find but it was a similar problem. It's like people don't know why they hate North. Just that they do.

[vryivs]

fanfic writer interview

thank you @tiesanjiaoshenanigans

How many works do you have on AO3? 52

What's your total AO3 word count? 571, 768

Your top 5 stories by kudos/likes:

Tangerine, Macaron (seongjoong)

the dirt that you're made of (yanqing)

恋の予感 (the longest path to us) (seongjoong)

If I Can Leave One Memory (sansang)

the stars are here (seongjoong)

Do you respond to comments? Why or why not? yes!! i usually go through my comments right before i upload a new fic or chapter, just because that's easiest

What's the fic you've written with the angstiest ending? god um ok. one sec. it's definitely 白镜 - White Mirror. tragic lesbians... most of what i write has a happy or at least ambiguous ending but this one follows canon so it's a tragedy instead

What's the fic you've written with the happiest ending? oh man! tbh it's probably 恋の予感 (the longest path to us) again. although nearly everything i write ends happy

Do you write crossovers? not rlly... they just don't appeal to me that much so I've never written them. i dont read them either

Have you ever received hate on a fic? nope! considering how long ive been writing it honestly kind of surprises me--its not even like i write particularly safe stuff either. i figure that maybe its because so much of my work is so personal that a people tend to maintain good etiquette and dont talk shit directly to me

Do you write smut? If so, what kind? yes. the cinematic kind lol. last time i wrote something explicit was fine, but i much prefer writing smut in a more literary style? not sure if that makes sense. the writing equivalent of close shots and fancy camera angles and lens flare, although that doesnt mean that i cant be crass when i want

Have you ever had a fic stolen? i dont think so, but its not like i check

Have you ever had a fic translated? nop! someday i want to get good enough to translate my own hsr work into chinese just bc so much of what i write is influenced by reading and learning about chinese culture and linguistic quirks, but that wont be any time soon

Have you ever co-written a fic before? yes!! several actually. lonely 'til you hold me was a collab with a pinch hitter for the event it was for. then i also wrote on my old account Accursed Spawn with @shineoftherainbow which to this day i am obsessed with

What's your all-time favorite ship? oh man... i am fickle and my tastes change by the week, but i think i will always have a soft spot for einsla, even if i dont write them much

What's a WIP that you want to finish but don't think you ever will? never say never but probably the seongjoong royalty au. i had it planned and everything but then people started discoursing around eden and the planned ending i wrote was potentially too topical, so i waited and then i lost steam.

What are your writing strengths? flow i think? ive always been pretty good at keeping things moving at a good pace. i edit myself a lot (and practice editing on some actual published books too!) so its become second nature to chop and change and move things around.

What are your writing weaknesses? actually writing. just kidding. probably that when i get stuck on something i tend to focus only on the fact that im stuck and cannot continue until i have unstuck myself

What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic? depends on what is meant my this! if it's about honorifics in dialogue (eg, hyung, -chan, dajie etc) i support it, since a lot don't translate well to english. Same with terms of endearment like -ito and -ie. if it's whole dialogue, it really depends. am i supposed to be able to understand the dialogue? is it something that could've been written just as well with 'he says, in [language]', does the author understand what they're writing, is it a text based or verbal conversation? does the pov character understand what's being said? (personally the best way to have dialogue in other languages is if the pov character isn't supposed to understand it. but always be aware that a native speaker of that language may still read the fic)

What's a fandom/ship you haven't written for yet but want to? kiamei! i love my lesbian mothers.

What's your favorite fic you've written?

白镜 - White Mirror. lets go lesbians! i really enjoyed writing in this style

tagging: @shineoftherainbow @himbodevotee @nicenightmare13 @morifiinwe @marichild @linhuine

[markerofthemidnight]

🏳️‍🌈 as many as you want.

🏳‍🌈 do you have any headcanons (lgbt, race, neuro, etc) that are important to you?

Oh, shit! No specific fandom in mind or anything?! HOLY SHIT YOU BET I’M GONNA MAKE THE MOST OF THIS!

(warning: rant incoming (under cut))

Hatchetfield (specifically The Lords in Black)

I’ve already talked about my headcanons for their sexualities on a different ask, so let me just run through any specific mental stuff I think they may have…

Tinky definitely has ADHD or something similar, Pokey probably has some kind of antisocial disorder which is why he’s… Like That™️, and maybe autism too (noise sensitivity). I’ve also called Wiggly a narcissist a few times, and while I stand by the fact that that could be the case, I don’t want to make a statement like that about a disorder that I don’t know all too well.

They all go by he/it mainly. They’re fine with any pronouns, though.

Project: Eden’s Garden

I’m not going to give any disorder to Tozu because I think it’s much more fitting for him to just be… straight-up insane rather than having any undiagnosed mental thingy (though ADHD is a possibility, short attention span and all.) He’s definitely somewhere in the ace spectrum, if you ask me! I’d personally like to say panromantic and asexual. And obviously, his race is British.

Mara is also somewhere on the ace spectrum, though I haven’t decided where. I’m not sure what kind of mental illness she might have, though probably something trauma-related like PTSD knowing the kind of story the devs will probably give her.

Other than that, lemme run through the students really quick… Eva is also also somewhere on the ace spectrum, Eloise has an inferiority complex, Damon has DEFINITELY had some very non-straight thoughts that he’s in denial about… oh, and Kai goes by he/they, though wether that’s just for the clout or if they’re genuinely genderqueer is up for debate!

Chonny Jash (GOD it’s been a while since I mentioned that name huh?)

You will pry my headcanon that the Headspace is just the result of a really weird plural disorder from my cold, dead hands. Other than that, Heart and Mind are both autistic, just in different ways (Heart has sensory problems, Mind is antisocial with a tendency to take everything literally, and both have special interests). Soul definitely has something too, but I’m not sure what.

They’re all gay as shit, but to different extents (Soul is straight up homosexual, Heart is pan with a preference for men, and Mind is grey-homoromantic aseuxal).

Finally, they all grew up in Australia but moved to the states at some point in their life (hence their accents. Their old one comes back sometimes depending on their emotions.)

Dreams of an Insomniac

Alex is gay. So gay. I don’t know why they just give off those vibes.

Dr Lankmann is aro/ace, and doesn’t understand people who feel any kind of attraction at all. As in, some of his closest followers have had to talk him out of dissecting the brains of allo people multiple times.

We already know that all Veldigun are aro/ace, and mainly go by he/it pronouns, but if I were to add to that: The Flock goes by they/it, and Simon goes by he/they and is only referred to as “it” by those who don’t trust him.

And, while you’ve given me the opportunity… eh, why the hell not? SNG&D HEADCANONS LETS GOOOOOO (spoilers ahead but honestly I don’t think you care)

SNG&D

(JJ and Ricky are from SpiffyNeedleGeeks’ now-cancelled Curse of Strahd campaign, and played by Lettersent (or Dion, he’s fine with either))

First off, they’re both aro/ace. Like, SO aro/ace. These are children we’re talking about, after all.

We already know they have OSDD canonically, but a very specific headcanon I’ve had for a long time is that they’re also autistic! Mainly because generally their vibes remind me of my own autistic ass, but also because LOOK AT THEM. LOOK AT JJ’S BLANK FUCKING AUTISM CREATURE STARE.

JJ’s autism manifests mainly in the way he acts. Again, the blank stare he canonically does 99% of the time, his tendency to stay futher away from the group (especially before he really learns to trust the rest of the party), the sort of silent nervousness he has around strangers contrasted by the rabid little bastard he becomes when he’s around people he dislikes (in a different way to Ricky taking control) all give me a lot of autistic vibes.

Ricky, however, is a bit harder to categorise. Mainly because most of these are just my headcanons, but… eh. I like to think that he’s, to an extent, a bit noise-sensitive (part of the reason why he doesn’t like social situations besides just being terrible at them), we already know he’s touch-averse canonically, and he’s got a big aversion to certain tastes and textures (though that’s less due to the autism and more due to the fact that he’d literally never eaten before in his life until like a week ago).

This also adds a much funnier layer to why he’s so overprotective of JJ. It’s not just because, y’know, he was born specifically to protect him, but also because it’s literally his special interest. Whenever someone asks him something about him, it probably takes all the strength he has to resist the urge to ramble for hours.

Aside from that, the brothers also both gained PTSD from everything they’ve been through. While I’m fairly sure it’s canon that Ricky has PTSD from their death, I like the idea that JJ has some too that he more or less got over in the years between their death and meeting the party. (The sight of a Displacer Beast still puts him on edge, though.)

…Sorry, I just- I had to get that off my chest.

I could talk about my headcanons for some of their other characters more, but I think I’ve been ranting on too much (besides, it’s mainly JJ and Ricky I have headcanons for anyways, as they are by far my favourites).

[kaddyssammlung]

A deep knowing that this incarnation will change everything

“even when we run with death”

This, again, about the little snippets that we have from the director's notes from that graphic novel and also some lyrics.

I always assumed that Vessel is a bit like me and that he has a strange knowing. This knowing is about this incarnation being the last one of its kind. Something will end but I don't know when and also when I say that something will end I mean this in a positive way.

What do I know for sure?! Not much?!

I had a vision in 2016 and I never knew what to do with it. I saw myself surrounded by hmmm how do I say this “galactics”, all kinds of beings such as fairies and angels and I watched them heal my physical body and also my energetic body. This felt so real as if it was something that I remembered. It felt familiar.

I never thought about that ever again.

“My redemption, eternal ascension setting me free”

Then I started hearing all kinds of things about “ascension”. Everyone explains this in a different way and also there is so much weird stuff on the YouTubes and everywhere. So I'm trying to explain this in my own words, because they feel right.

In my opinion / perception this is something that can be see like a giant enlightenment. So many humans remember their true self and therefore their power and become enlightened. This has a ripple effect because we are all connected (“quantum entaglement if you are interested in that). Everyone who gets enlightened causes other humans to have the same experience. And then one day the whole planet follows.

That's how I see this in my own words. Maybe that makes sense. Maybe not....

Anyway we are returning Eden. No one takes you back to Eden, we are taking ourselves back to Eden. Eden to me is home. The home that I miss so much. It's a frequency or a state of being. Everything is in harmony again.

And everything else?! Idk....I assume this will happen within the blink of an eye but shortly before it will look as if the sky will fall down on us.

“And take it to the broken skies at last”

There are so many “weird lyrics” that you can read or that I interpret in that way.

Ascension does set us free again because we were trapped on this planet. But that's a whole different story.

So when Vessel sings how ascencion and how it sets him free...I can only think that this can be applied to all of us.

And also since it will probably look as if the sky will fall down on us....yeah well....

Whatever..I know that most of you are probably like: what?! Totally fine!

You know....I'm weird XD and also: I'm not saying that this has to be the case.

It's just a strange knowing that I have but that I can't explain

[night-heron-writes]

My Thoughts on Spy x Family Chapter 75

Warning: This post contains spoilers for Chapter 75 of the manga

Firstly, the stellas were very much deserved all around. All four of them were very brave the entire time, and even though I think Anya and Damian each deserved an extra stella for the bomb collars around their necks, I wouldn't be surprised if Eden has a policy of not giving out more than one stella at a time to each student.

Becky wanting to use the event to launch her singing career is hysterical and honestly a very 6-year-old thing to do.

Now for the parents' reactions:

Mr. Blackbell wins 2nd place in the Most Concerned Parent Contest. He was literally ready to go to war for her and started bawling the moment she was safe.

The Anya/Yor reunion was sweet and went down pretty much as I expected. I am glad Anya got to break down and cry now that she and everyone else are safe.

Twilight's reaction was kinda underwhelming, but I'm banking on him just absolutely breaking down once he gets back home. He's probably still running on adrenaline and hasn't really processed anything yet.

But Melinda. Holy shit. This woman is complicated. Where do I even start with her?

I'm noticing how the positive, caring thoughts/emotions come first, and then are followed by the appallingly cold stuff. It's like her first, instinctual reaction is to love and worry for Damian, but she's desperately trying to convince herself she doesn't care.

Interestingly enough, the way she's talking here makes me wonder if she is Donovan's second wife. Not once has Melinda ever mentioned Demetrius, even with the Mommy Club. She did, however, bring up Damian in conversation with Yor.

If she is indeed Mrs. Desmond No. 2, then I'm very curious ab what might have happened to her predecessor. Her being Donovan's second wife would potentially explain the seemingly large age gap between Demetrius and Damian.

It also seems like she didn't want children, or at least didn't want to have children in this particular relationship. Given what we know of Donovan and what we now know of Melinda's psyche, I think its safe to say he is at the very least emotionally abusing his family and quite possibly doing much worse. He seems like the type to pull some messed up psychological shit. It would make sense imo for Melinda to not want to bring kids into that kind of household. But I can imagine her wishes not being respected, partly bc of societal pressure and partly bc Donovan doesn't seem to care what anyone else wants.

That might explain her abrupt attitude switch, if she has loads of Donovan-related trauma. She literally went from Yuri-levels of devotion to and obsession over her son to wishing he'd died in the hijacking within like 0.1 seconds after Donovan was mentioned. She even calls him "that man" instead of "my husband" or "your father", which is honestly very telling.

I wonder if Melinda trying to convince herself she doesn't care about Damian is so that Donovan can't use him against her. If this is the case, then Donovan getting wind of her actual feelings towards Damian could be disastrous for them both. This of course doesn't excuse her behavior in the slightest, but is one interesting theory to explain her mental and emotional state.

Melinda seems to think that Damian's existence traps her in the Donovan household. She both loves him because he's her son and resents him because he keeps her tied to a waking nightmare, hence her wishing he'd died in the hijacking. She probably thinks that if he'd died, they'd both be free. If she didn't have him to worry about, she would likely run away to the in-universe equivalent of Italy or something. I can't imagine her being happy in her current situation.

All in all, I'm starting to think that living in the dorms is really the safest, healthiest option for the Desmond kids. They may face ridiculously high expectations, but at least they have a solid routine and aren't in a house where they have to wonder if their parents actually care for their well-being.

I think it would be fascinating if at some point Melinda suffers a breakdown and ends up a patient of everybody's favorite psychiatrist, Loid Forger. What other kinds of issues lurk beneath the surface of her mind?