#probably ill post my ugly edits

[writingquestionsanswered]

Writing with Chronic Illness

strigiformthunderstorm asked: Could you advise on forming a writing routine with a chronic illness? I have several conditions that cause a lot of pain and fatigue, and working part-time takes up nearly all of my energy. I used to write daily but stopped while I was in "survival mode", and now getting in my head about the quality prevents me from writing. I've had success with creating multiple routines to accommodate my fluctuating symptoms, so instead of writing out a schedule, I'm kind of choreographing a dance. For example, right now I'm coming out of a flare up so I'm trying to think of adaptations like writing in bed, taking naps between writing sessions, and being less hard on myself about smoking for my pain while writing + just doing brain dumps if that's what I need to get into the flow of things. I'm also neurodivergent. I'm trying to get to the point I'm actually writing the book (instead of world building/planning) and am making consistent progress.

[Ask edited for length]

A few things that might help:

1 - Don't worry about writing daily or hitting specific word counts. Doing things to "move the needle" are just as important, even if that is doing brain dumps, researching, or looking for inspiration photos.

2 - Try to avoid making writing feel like a stressful activity that your brain will automatically want to avoid. The things you're doing are already on the right track, so continue to give yourself grace, give yourself positive reinforcement for anything that moves the needle, and doing what you can to make writing relaxing and rewarding.

3 - Many writers find that writing sprints are a productive way for them to get words on the page. So, for example, try setting a timer for 10 or 20 minutes (or whatever increment works for you) and write as much as you can during that time. Don't worry about quality (we'll get to that in a minute), just get the words down. Do this a few times a day, and it starts to add up quickly. You may also find that you gather momentum and are able to write more per sprint, sprint for longer periods, and/or include more sprints into your day.

4 - Focusing overly much on quality is probably a bigger obstacle for you right now than anything else. This is by far and away the biggest pitfall writers fall into. Remember: writing is a process that requires editing and revision. No one writes a perfect first draft. There's a reason we call them "rough drafts" and "zero drafts." There's a reason we self-edit and revise. There's a reason we use beta readers, critique partners, and editors. It isn't supposed to be perfect at the beginning. Imagine being a sculptor, taking out a lump of clay, squeezing it to shape it a few times, and then being livid because it isn't a beautiful sculpture. That's what you're doing when you allow your brain to be frustrated about the quality of your writing when you're writing a first draft. You're getting mad because your lump of clay didn't instantly become a beautiful sculpture. If you never let your lump of clay be a lump of clay, and something that looks more like a misshapen whatever rather than the thing you're trying to make, then you'll never get it to the point of actually becoming the beautiful sculpture. You have to let the words on the page be ugly before you can shape them into something beautiful when it's time to edit and revise. Have a look at the following posts for more:

Concentrate on Quantity at First, Not Quality Overcoming Embarrassment Over Own Writing Delaying Writing Out of Fear Worried About Writing Style

5 - As far as routine goes, you're actually already doing what I would have suggested, which is to utilize a variety of different routines that are catered to meet your needs in the moment. Doing the things you're already doing, plus what is mentioned above, will hopefully be enough to get you over this hurdle.

Sending you lots of happy thoughts and hope for progress! ♥

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I’ve been writing seriously for over 30 years and love to share what I’ve learned. Have a writing question? My inbox is always open!

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[transexualpirate]

this is very interesting actually. i do believe in letting people do whatever they want. but more than that, why would anyone think those two things are mutually exclusive?

"let people do whatever they want" and "pregnancy can be a horribly traumatizing experience that no one should have to go through against their will" can and should coexist. especially because i think that an abortion shouldn't exclusively happen on the basis that it'd be bad for the person. i also wholeheartedly believe that even if a person is physically financially and emotionally able to have a baby, if they're simply not interested in having that baby, they can and should abort freely.

does that mean that i don't empathize or advocate for the rights of whoever is getting that abortion? i don't think so. the fact is, i don't think the reason why someone wants an abortion matters all that much. because one of my fundamental beliefs is in radical bodily autonomy. as long as you're not harming anyone do whatever you want forever. so yeah. shrug. let people do whatever they want i guess.

and no, i don't really get how you can be against abortion and simultaneously against someone getting, for instance, top surgery. why are you cherry picking bodily autonomy? this isn't to say that you can literally do whatever you want all the time (some reading comprehension, please!). of course there are boundaries. examples: you can get any tattoo you want, unless it's a hate symbol, and in that case, it's actively harming people, so you can't. you can do whatever you want with your hair, unless you're white and want to get dreads. in that case, you'd be appropriating something that isn't from your culture and it'd be actively harming people (and also, it'd probably ruin your hair but that's not the reason why). but as long as you're not hurting anyone, you can do whatever you want forever, in my opinion, and the reasons why you're doing it aren't that groundbreakingly important safe a few obvious examples. i don't care what the reasons behind you getting an abortion are, ill fight for your right to get it regardless. i also i don't care what the reasons behind you getting "gender reassignment surgery" are, or you getting a piercing, or an ugly tattoo, or a boob job. of course im allowed to personally think they're stupid, or influenced by things that i fundamentally disagree with, or i think your reasons are just shitty and personally believe you shouldn't get it. but ill still fight for your right to be able to get it anyways. it's your body. you're the one that has to live in it, not me. and i support radical bodily autonomy.

and lastly i think the tags are just objectively stupid. im south american and most of the people i surround myself with have the same belief. ive never even set foot outside of my country. i can promise you the anglos didn't invent bodily autonomy. and of course we believe in boundaries. and "culturally allergic" is kind of an odd expression. weird take, but whatever.

as always this is just my personal opinion and im open to discussion.

EDIT: i realized i forgot to crop out the url, so i edited the post. please reblog this version without the urls and don't send that person hate. this is what they want and it will be used against us after.

[azumasoroshi]

i have no idea what episode this is part 2

part 2 of this post i think?? tbh i found the clip in some random youtube video i have no idea if this takes place directly after or not and im just judging based on the time of day/setting

(i actually did search through like. the last few episodes of season 1 and the first few episodes of shou and i couldnt find shit so i'm assuming that this episode happened in one of the places i didnt check. not for lack of trying but because the website i was using straight up died on the spot trying to load them all so quickly)

(edit: it's episode 16 of durarara season 1 ty @/pineapplething)

this screenshot is killing me actually. i had to pause instead of doing the 0.25 speed thing because i need his hands to be on his hips so it looks like he's just. staring down at the thing judgingly. izaya's pose is so funny because right before that he's like

'what the fuck are you doing shizu-chan'

i forget the context of this scene too but like. why wasnt he pointing the knife at shizuo?? what were they doing. bro i love not having ANY context whatsoever and being too lazy to look up the actual episode

anyway babygirl looks so ugly in those shots god bless

bro why you arching your back like that 🤨

in front of izaya too. god

the way they have four separate reaction shots for izaya. bro the things that must've been going on through his head were NOT safe for work on god.

the way he says 'seriously' and then remembers to point the knife like bro had to take a second. he was processing. he almost looks enamored in that first shot actually (<- delusional)

izaya's rectangle prism ass never ceases to amaze. glad he keeps that in both art styles

shizuo looks so funny from this angle i bet you could get the most unhinged smear frames every time he goes rage mode

can we get like an angry shizuo aesthetic moodboard except it's all either low quality or smear frames. it'd be really funny trust

also incredible how shizuo can extend the length of the guard rail to like. twice its size. it was not that big in the previous images. i wonder if that's a metaphor for something

god these SUCKED to get pictures of because celty comes in so fast and there's no indication of when the frames will switch but i do it for you (im doing this for me. im obsessed. i have a final on tuesday for the class i have a B in but actually i think it's a D now)

these would probably be much easier to screenshot if i just downloaded the videos but why would i do that when i can press the back arrow key 50 zillion times and listen to the crunchy 0.25 audio explode every time shizuo opens his mouth

this image gets me every time ugh they almost look like they were having a casual conversation or smth (<-delusional)

just. arch enemies both being distracted by something long enough to stop beefing with each other does something to me. i dont even know it doesnt have to be romantic i just like watching it (although it's usually romantic because im a sucker for enemies to/and lovers if you couldnt tell by my usual ships)

that's the end of this scene (or at least the youtube clip of it. you cannot ask me to load all those anime episodes again) but like man. good shit ill be replaying this in my brain for the next week or so

[novvaable]

Get to Know Me- Sims Edition

thank you @hurricanesims for the tag <33

sorry for taking so long to reply, for some reason it took me ages to actually answer these questions🤠

What's your favourite Sims death?

i hate when my sims die.. i can honestly say i’ve never forcefully killed any of my sims as I get so attached to them. in this case, id probably say death by old age.

Alpha CC or Maxis Match?

alpha! back when I used to play ts4 i gravitated towards maxis match.

Do you cheat your sims weight?

seems pointless to me lol

Do you use move objects?

yes!🫡🫡 impossible to build /decorate without it

Favourite Mod?

nrass master controller - it so universal and makes life a lot easier 🥺

First Expansion/Game Pack/Stuff Pack?

my first expansion was university life. it will forever have a special place in my heart, I love it so much

Do you pronounce live mode or aLIVE or LiVing?

never even thought about it honest, probably like alive??

whos your favourite sim that you've made?

my girlie marcie, she’s come so far with me so I just have a special kinda attachment to her lol

Have you made a simself?

no i think this would just make me miserable

Which is your favourite EA hair colour?

none. I always find the tones of ea hairs to just be a little off? i just use custom colours

Favourite EA hair?

well i dont use any EA hairs they look ugly I have default replacements hairs by maryjane

Favourite life stage?

young adult

are you a builder or are you in it for gameplay?

only recently have i been in it for the gameplay. but i use that phrase lightly. i wil forever be a builder at heart.

Are you a CC creator?

barely lol. sometimes i post occasional things for dl. my knowledge of cc making only scratches the surface. i can do the basics like make poses, and custom photos (alongside sims and builds - but who doesnt).

ive tried to get into cc making a couple of times but its so complicated? i have mad respect for cc makers in the community. ill leave that job to the professionals.

Do you have any Simblr friends or a Sim Squad?

back in my day... lol not so much anymore. after i took a fat hiatus a lot of the people i used to regularly talk with moved on.

@pixelevia is still my girlie. she doesnt post much, but we talk all the time off tumblr and regularly get each other excited about sims storylines that are yet to come to life lol.

Do you have any sims merch?

yes.. i am embarrassed to say that when ts4 was release i pre-ordered the deluxe version. it came with a mouse pad.. its long gone now. but i always remember it having a funky smell ??

also i dont wanna talk about the fact i paid an arm and a leg for ts4 (i dont even play it?!) and now its free. forever going to be salty over this fact.

How has your ''Sims Style'' changed throughout your years of playing?

i'd like to think it has! considering my blog is old, i feel like it has grown with me and that reflects in the style of my sims. recently ive been striving for a slightly more realistic looks to my sims

Whats your Origin ID?

i do have an origin id unfortunately. (is it stil even called that?)

i have a lot of opinions on this new ea app bs. but we wont go into that.

Who's your favourite CC creator?

everyone! honestly anyone who has the skills to be able to make beautiful and functional cc are brilliant.

but just to name a couple:

@rollo-rolls

@smallsimmer

@martassimsbook

@sourlemonsimblr

@satellite-sims

How long have you had simblr?

I had to check my email for this.. as of feb 2023, my blog turned 9 years old?! so I guess almost 10 years. (thats kind of mad)

How do you edit your pictures?

depends on the picture! usually for scenery pics I will just sharpen them and adjust the brightness / saturation / contrast.

for sim pics it really just depends on how bothered I can be.

I’ve recently made the change to gshade so that’s been doing all the heavy lifting for me.

I use hunnybee’s moon syrups preset <3

What expansion/ stuff pack is your favourite?

university life!! it was the it was the first expansion pack i got and so it holds a special place in my heart. its also a pretty awesome pack too.

tagged:

@satellite-sims / @smallsimmer / @pixelevia @kitty-pixelz

[beepject]

hey everyone! I know that i dont regularly post art here, but i'm here to advertise my roblox (robux) commissions! :)

this looks a little ugly, sory about that. ill make a better one soon i promis

BY THE WAY. IMPORTANT. i havent made any of the gamepasses yet at this time so please be patient thank you (will probably make them tomorrow as i cant rn)

Contact me through discord if you want to commission me ^_^ (discord: turntopageone)

reminder i could be awake or sleepinf when you want to commission me,,,,,,,,, timezones . ;(

Edit: gamepasses have been made!

[ghostisventing]

Yay

me when I’ve been mentally ill more than half my life, I still have crippling social anxiety and selective mutism, have no friends, have never been in a romantic or sexual relationship or even received romantic affection, am bad at everything I do like drawing, writing, poetry, singing, editing etc and I’m too stupid for school and I’m ugly and I literally just do nothing but exist all day every day and no one appreciates my work online I’m no one’s favorite anything and I can’t even function like a normal person I have no online friends either and everyone ignores me even my teachers and no medication I’ve been on for my period issues has worked and my mental illness is chronic and I don’t have a good relationship with my parents and I can’t even get attention by posting nudes and I’ll probably never be able to get a job and I’m too stupid for a PhD and I don’t know how to talk to people and I’ll probably die alone and

[jakowskis]

Loved ‘an ugly picture, you & me’ so so much. Srsly I read it like 10 times and still won’t get tired of it. It’s such a great piece of writing. Now my question: Do you already if ur gonna post more Torchwood fanfic?? (no pressure obv, writing is so so hard and I admire everyone who actually manages to finish their stories).

oh my goodness thank you so much 🥺 that means the world to me im so glad you liked it so much

man ok so. heres the thing. djkfds aaa idek how to talk abt this it makes me feel stupid fdshkfj. basically i have dx'd ocd and it affects my writing process a Lot. im exceptionally critical n perfectionistic when it comes to my writing, and when my ocd's at its worse, i can reread things literally hundreds of times. this makes my editing process a fucking nightmare. an ugly picture was... a Journey, i wrote the bulk of it in like a month or two bc i was Inspired, and that period of inspiration just flowing was super nice - but then i spent literally half a year obsessing over editing and figuring out a few sections i couldnt get to work and it was. rlly rlly unhealthy and messy. like that was a stereotypical Mentally Ill Artist™ moment for me 😭 i was unmedicated during that process and honestly im still impressed with myself for managing to finish and post it anyway.

and after posting it... this might not make sense unless u have ocd but that fic is, like, tainted in my head, and im not allowed to touch it as a result. which is RLLY fucking annoying and sad bc i wrote it for Me and it was a labor of love yanno, and i am proud of it, like during writing i was like 'man this is one of the best things ive written, im genuinely proud of this' and ive gotten some absolutely wonderful reception - but i cant exactly place why, idk if it was the torment of the editing process or a fear of experiencing that specific brand of anxiety again (if i reread it and run into errors it might kill me 😭)... either way at this point in time im legitimately unable to revisit that fic. and its been like this since i posted it, so... for nearly five months ;-; and im kind of having a similar experience with torchwood as a whole tbh. like my whole fandom experience + relationship with this fixation has been bastardized to all hell bc of ocd issues. it all feels very... dirty right now.

which fucking sucks, cuz torchwood's one of my fav fixations ive ever had, it became so important to me so fast and it's probably hit special interest territory at this point - but it sucks what a thin line it is between obsessing over a hyperfixation, and compulsively engaging with something. it sucks when the serotonin u get from smth also gets laced with pervasive anxiety. my recent main issue with ocd has been avoidance - i went from obsessively going thru torchwood clips to being unable to watch it at all bc the very thought of doing so makes me so anxious.

(so, tldr? my mental illness garbage is interfering w my interests and my ability to engage with fandom, to my chagrin, and that's why i haven't posted anything else.)

that being said: between april 2023 and now i have written 180k words of torchwood fanfic. im endlessly fascinated and inspired by these characters, particularly by owen who has lowkey proven to be my muse lol. (he sits in my mind palace on top of a, like, literal fancy ass corinthian pedestal and his one job is to sit still n look pretty and sad but instead he snarks down at me every time i walk passed and in return i squirt a water gun at him and occasionally throw tomatoes at him. it's a very mutually loving relationship.) and 180k words in, and literally hundreds of hours spent thinking about and talking about tw/owen, and im still fascinated by it/him, there are still soooo many things i wanna explore through writing with these characters that i adore so much. 57k of the 180k words is part of what will eventually be a sequel series to an ugly picture (which is meant to be a stand-alone, for the record, but towards the end of the writing process i went "Hm. Actually I Have More Ideas", and it became a whole 'verse heh). problem is i dont rmr the fic enough to continue the first sequel and currently i cant revisit it and take notes 🤡 so that project's on hold. as for the other stuff, it's a good mix of misc one-shots and full-on projects, and several things are pretty much done and could, if i were anyone else, easily be polished and posted.

but, as ive made clear, unfortunately writing (well, revising + editing) is an absolute nightmare for me. now, im recently back on medication after nearly two years of rawdogging it, and ive been having issues with that fff (namely constant pervasive exhaustion) - but im working to figure out a happy medium, so im HOPING, hell, praying, that once i level out ill be able to open my docs and sit down and finish things without it being a goddamn ordeal. editing's not rlly fun for anyone, but it fucking sucks when your absolute favorite hobby + mode of expression gets terrorized by a wiggity wack disorder.

first order of business, once im able, is a 15k owen/andy fic that's literally 90% done. i wanted to post it in june, for pride month, and then my brain decided to convince me i wasnt being coherent in the slightest and i was like, nah, i cannot make myself soldier through the editing project this time, i dont want this to get ruined the same way. but hopefully soon i can drop that and it will be epic and such 😎

so in summation uh (sorry im a known babbler fdshk but this is what happens when u send an ask to someone who wrote a 30k fic where literally nothing happens KJFSD. also sorry for literally trauma dumping unprompted 😭 i did the white woman in the kmart thing) ive written a ton of torchwood fic and i 100% intend to write a ton more but mental illness garbage is trying to sabotage shit so basically im taking a break from trying to post any of it until my brain lets me enjoy my damn interest in relative peace 👍but i definitely have a lot more fic on the way. just might take a while for it to see the light of day. hopefully not that long

anyway thank you again so so so much for liking the fic enough to read it multiple times that means so much to meee. i hope to have more for u soon :))

[narwhalandchill]

(& lil PSA since these will be p long writeups most likely. feel free to block "jens b2 nuzlocke tag" if u dont wanna see my pokemon rambles jajsksieisidisi)

okie now done w roxie and in castelia city, think ill take a break for now!!! update time

castelia sewers encounter: zubat with a 27 (!!!!) IV in speed, very excited - i Hate zubat and golbats designs with a passion but crobat is a Friend. his name is fig and hes a lil ugly now but once we become besties its all cool. also zubat is like a billion times better than either grimer or rattata lmao so a W for sure. very likely going to carry burghs gym since the level cap is 24 there

castelia city grassy plaza encounter: did the repel strat in the dark grass and successfully caught my eevee as planned!!! altho my umbreon spdef heavy toxic stall wall dreams were lowkey crushed bc. while he has a boosting nature (sassy boy). the IV is like 0-1 😭😭 rip. well he has a 29 in hp at least. but i think rio the eevee is staying in the box until i have a particular need for a specific eeveelution

i could go into the relic passage already but since the only Really good option there imho is drilbur from the dust clouds w 80% chances and i kinda ran out of repels looking for rio i think ill leave it for now. like as broken as excadrill is i also could get a sandile from route 4 in which case id have a ground type so. will wait for now

roxie was honestly just shamelessly cheesed w fridge the magnemite and sonic boom like. she just has 0 moves to hit a steel type with for anything but tiny baby sized chip dmg so it was pretty free lmao

castelia city obviously means picking up some other essentials like leftovers and mystic water for pat the dewott so thats also neat. leftovers went to fridge (ha ha get it) for now.

think thats all major there o7 so far there havent been any like. true close calls that much but if ik anything abt nuzlockes is that when u start taking it Too easy thats when they get u so 💀 remaining very vigilant even if its probably highly overkill in just a vanilla game. its not even challenge mode lol starting it easy . maybe ill get blaze black in the future if this run goes well for a bigger challenge

+ edit. omg Almost forgor. so like i didnt even remember the silk scarf u find in virbank city after getting the cut HM. so like nvm last post tags where its like wow max friendship herdier with STAB return how op. bc. make that Silk Scarf Max Friendship STAB Return instead lmao. my zip is a powerful bulky boy now

[twildflower]

Long awaited doodle dump lmaooo its cut off bc i have some i want to spotlight and they make the post too long n i dont wanna like clog up peoples tl :3

Also mature tag is bc i talk abt some rlly uh fucked up stuff under cut

This is like um sorry i was in a silly goofy chinese mode whoopsies i did translate it tho its not direct translation bc uh chinese and english diff umm its kinda weird in english it’s actually more like green saying did gold teach you that again but i like my personal translation better also look at my handwriting that every single person ive known in my life say is ugly as fuck wooooooo

Hehe Silver in Golds clothes and Reds hat :3 i like this alot i was gonna add gold and red as you can see but i didnt finish yet I’ll probably repost it when i draw it

バニバニガール！i love すりぃ’s バニー go check it out its a really fun song about bunny (girl)s also damn. That hand. It does not look like its drawn by me.

Cutoff here theres a few doodles im not too proud of/not very uh rated e for everyone/random doodles so they will be under the cut B)

Silver with like ribbon tied on his hair :3

This is based off like a pixiv artist’s regold drawings of like red taking gold’s eye n eating it or smth im very interested in like this specific. Uh. Thing. Niche? Idk i just like the idea of like. Hehe. Stolen eye or smth sorry im very sick in the head :3 i see alot of like amputation and other weird stuff on pixiv too from like all the fandoms ive been in but thats not really my thing i really like this eye thing tho okay what the hell im marking this thing as mature im talking abt way too mature stuff

Eerr random eye doodle that turned into a full thing but i wanted to draw goggles too so eh its not very correct tho lmao also hi yes my ugly ass handwriting again i think its fine as long as its not unintelligible yk I don’t know why like everyone i know well most people say its bad like. Grow up at least its readable >:(

This one makes me want to mark this post as mature but ehhhh nah ‘s fine i think. This was written before the second one sorry. I will just be fr now I have been drawing so many like this kinda faces and sometimes anatomy poses bc!!!! I am drawing. Cool. This is just the one that looks better after a few practices lol. :3 Also i like drew the small part of the hair somewhere but idk where’s that paper my whole school binder is just fucking messy af bc i keep going thru where my doodles are. So yeah that thing is probably never going to be found again until i throw papers away or study for exams which is like a month later i think idk im gonna kms i hate maths im so failing mathswhy is it functions i dont understand shit

The fucking maid day doodle thing its so fucking ugly lmaooooo pls im gonna die

Sorry i did not realized i rambled so much under almost every doodle im very scatterbrained im actually so sorry i dont know why i do this im going to fucking cry i do this with literally anything even in schoolwork okay its so laye i haeto sleep maybe ill edit the long brambles out on laptop tmr my phone is lagging the shit out

[2set-breddy]

hi i decided to create this acc to post about these two bc i love them so fuckin much

[soldierwinters]

|x|

[galadhremmin]

We have derived Caranthir liking the Dwarves (and vice versa) because apparently, Finrod succeeds in every field Caranthir fails, and at this point it's clear this derives from the in-universe writer of the Silm and his own biases. Think about it: "Dark Finwë" , a grumpy, prejudiced lordling, and "Hair Champion", most handsome, noble king, have met with the same people!! Yet the king of the first secret kingdom is everyone's friend, but the prince that trades with them regularly is not... seems sus.

Hence, Caranthir is friends with the Dwarves. (But that is just an interpretation, so you're free to think what you wish, I just have several opinions on in-universe prejudice and the almighty narrative.)

I think that 'we' might actually have been Dawn Felagund years ago. Maybe this reading existed even before that, but I doubt that-- she's been very influential in silm fandom and was long before tumblr was much of a thing. https://dawnfelagund.com/caranthir-the-slandered

I wouldn't say it's 'clear' that what amounts to Caranthir's entire documented personality derives from the bias of the in-universe narrator, though as you can see from Dawn's writing it's a reading you can argue for. There are a number of different approaches you can take to the Silm and its biases anyway. One of the few times when it's absolutely clear the text isn't telling the entire story is when it talks about the Easterlings. I've posted about this before but the recorded names are, uhh.... the ones to betray the elves are unlikely to actually have been named things like 'ugly lord' and 'ugly beard.' 'Dark Finwe' on the other hand is a documented reference to his haircolour being dark like Finwe's own; hardly a negative judgement!

I personally think Caranthir can be exactly as ill-tempered and prejudiced as the Silm paints him without becoming an unsympathetic character. If a writer cannot make a moody, deeply prejudiced man an interesting character that is a failure as a writer; there are after all enough books who manage exactly that. That is not to say choosing not to write him that way is a failure (obviously not), but it's not necessary in order to make a reader feel for him at all.

Just going by the text, I think it actually might make for a more interesting narrative to explore in fic to me. Because he does change his mind about something, and at a very specific moment; when he meets the Haladin. That is much less dramatic if he secretly been as nice and popular as Finrod, and got along with everyone all the time already. He's been raised by Fëanor, who said things like 'No other race shall oust us!' and rallied the Noldor not motivated enough by vengeance for Finwë alone by playing on their deep-seated fear of being replaced by the Secondborn. Very unlikely that had no impact. At best it has made him uninterested in humans in his area (while they're not much of a threat to ruling instead of the elves anyway). The text says they paid them no heed.

And yet! Caranthir sees how brave Haleth and her people are. He 'does her great honour.' He changes his mind and offers them lands. His tragedy to me is not that of a slandered figure, but of this deeply, deeply prejudiced person raised to distrust the motivations of human beings -- who overcomes those beliefs, offers friendship, is rejected! then extends that same trust to the Easterlings anyway... and it's those specific Easterlings, not the ones who ally with his brothers-- who betray them all. And cause the disastrous ending of the Nirnaeth. It's the 'to evil end shall all things turn that they begin well' part of the curse hitting him in the least fair way possible. Someone finally changes for the better, and the outcome is treason and destruction.

That is a very good character arc to me, actually. His aesthetics-based scorn for the Dwarves is reprehensible but strikes me as deeply Elvish, and part of his prejudices. Naugrim is too unflattering a name for them for it not to be common. His temper-- well why can't he have one? Sure there's only one recorded instance -- but that's imo because there are hardly any conversations in the Silm! Anyway I like some people with tempers well enough. Personally I think people are missing out on opiniated grouches.

Obviously the biased anti-Feanorian Pengolodh reading is a nice one, and I have enjoyed a lot of stories written based it. But it's not at all a reading that is necessary for me to read Caranthir as a flawed but sympathetic character. He can have serious faults and still, ultimately, be someone I feel for.

What I was asking though was if I overlooked any canon evidence of Caranthir being particularly, personally fond of the Dwarves; and it seems I did not. Also; there is room for Caranthir growing to like the Dwarves over centuries without an anti-Feanorian bias reading this strong, there is simply no evidence for friendship in the rather barebones narrative (I'm not interested atm because it's wildly overdone to me & I like variety).

That said, in my opinion making Caranthir the hidden, slandered Feanorian Finrod equivalent with a dash of Curufin's Dwarf affection is not as enjoyable as simply working with what little canon character is actually there. Because there is one (and it's not the greedy tax collector of some fanon depictions either imo)

1. To start with, wrt Caranthir as the anti-Finrod, I don't think it works that well. Sure sure dark/light, open/prejudiced, repressed/shouty, but different motivations, different locations, plus they meet very different peoples even if both are Edain-- besides, Caranthir's own older brothers do successfully ally with the Easterlings without betrayal, while Curufin (much more so than Finrod! no Khuzdul for Finrod!) is the Dwarves' Friend(tm). Also, a flawed Finrod already exists. That's just the regular edition. He has his own faults and (very different) tragic arc.

If Finrod never seems to have strong prejudices to overcome, and if he's not confrontational (which... look he's a diplomat. Make of that what you will. Pretty awkward there in Doriath, buddy!) he does have trouble facing his own complicity (he wanted to sail those ships despite the murders) until Sauron beats him to death with it. He leaves Valinor with the idea of ruling but he has to give up the crown. He's ambitious, he seems emotionally repressed, he's.. possibly paying the greater Dwarves to drive the Petty Dwarves out of their ancestral home to build a city? Oops. Depending on the version you go with in that case, of course; there's also ones where he's free of the blame of that one. Not of wanting to sail those ships and being uneasy with the guilt wrt wanting to do so despite their being stolen and murdered for though. No he doesn't kill; but he wants to use the result of it anyway, and to make it worse he is actually half Telerin.

There's also (to be fair, only for sure after the disaster of the Sudden Flame because that's the recorded instance) his guards killing random innocent trespassers to keep his kingdom hidden -- yes, that's right there in Silm, yes he's still King at the time. Beren has to wave that ring. People just seem to miss that he'd be killed without it somehow.

I think it's just too easy to reduce him to the golden perfect opposite of Caranthir. Yes he's described more positively; he's also just mentioned more because unlike Caranthir he rules an actual kingdom, the greatest and richest in Beleriand in fact; and does things that have a lot of very longterm effects, like helping B&L steal a Silmaril. They don't 'meet the same people' anyway -- the Haladin have a different culture from the Beorians which contributes to their reaction to Caranthir (and iirc their later fate).

Sidenote: Dawn's essay attributes the Green Elves helping the Feanorians at Amon Ereb to Caranthir's diplomatic skills; but why not to those of Amras or Amrod? This is the quote; 'Caranthir fled and joined the remnant of his people to the scattered folk of the hunters, Amrod and Amras, and they retreated and passed Ramdal in the south. Upon Amon Ereb they maintained a watch and some strength of war, and they had aid of the Green-elves' -- nothing here indicates it was Caranthir who got them that aid. In fact A&A are the hunters, i.e. more likely to have roamed in various forests where they would have encountered Green Elves, imo.

There's also the very desperate times to consider in which this aid takes place. This is just post Sudden Flame, and even if the Green Elves didn't like Caranthir they probably liked him better than Morgoth. Also, speaking of cosmopolitans, Maedhros allies with, yes, Dwarves (Azaghal), Grey elves, Easterlings (and you might say: Fingolfinians); even part of the remaining people of Dorthonion rally to Himring post sudden flame (that means Edain and Arafinwean followers in Himring, at least for a time), and he manages to be friendly with Felagund despite calling him a badger. ;)

Finrod is not the only other leader to forge diverse alliances, and though B&L ends happily his people mostly do not. Caranthir's not much like Finrod in any way. Not in motivations, temperament, tragic arc. That's fine. No hidden kingdom for a dragon to eat either. Finrod could probably do with being a little less like Finrod sometimes, though he's well-intentioned and likable. Caranthir loves to shout and isn't sneaky. Good for him.

2. Curufin also already exists. His love for Dwarves is one of his defining and redeeming characteristics and boy does he need them. He's daddy's favourite, a sneaky overambitious bitchy bastard who is also a talented smith and linguist, and truly considered a Dwarf friend, which is apparently exceptional. He's quite flawed; tries to help Celegorm force a political marriage, laughs with a bruised mouth, seeming to lose his mind while attempting and failing murder after first losing his own stronghold and then the city he tried to take from his cousin. He's just... a personality. Mostly a bad one! You can feel for him though, because he seems like an utter mess. Many 'i would love to study you' feelings on my part. Would hate for him to be real but also I'd pay to be his therapist.

3. And then finally there's Canon Caranthir. A difficult, prejudiced person who despite that (which doesn't at all have to mean there is no despite, the despite is what makes it juicy)

- seems to be responsible for re-establishing (large scale?) trade with the Dwarves, whatever he might think of them (and they of him) to their mutual benefit. I don't think he's greedy either. It seems like a mutually profitable situation. Access to Dwarvish goods seems pretty vital to Beleriand, and facilitating trade is a real service.

As someone pointed out in the replies, the Silm does mention Dwarvish companies travelling east to Nan Elmoth and menegroth various times, but quote wrt Caranthir says 'Caranthir’s people came upon the Dwarves, who after the onslaught of Morgoth and the coming of the Noldor had ceased their traffic into Beleriand' and 'when the Dwarves began again to journey into Beleriand.'

They stopped at some point and Caranthir's people made it happen again.

- which means he's practical. He seems like he's good at organising, and setting his own feelings aside if necessary despite his prejudice and temper (which is an achievement it wouldn't be without his, hm, everything). Also he and his people as well as the Dwarves work together well because ''either people loved skill and were eager to learn,' despite their (initial?) mutual dislike. Those aren't bad characteristics; seems like it was an exchange of skill as well as goods and possibly providing safe travel opportunities.

I don't like the 'greedy Caranthir' fanon and don't think it is even that easy support entirely with canon. 'They had of it great profit,' the text says-- both Caranthir and the Dwarves. They exchanged skills and knowledge and Caranthir seems to have helped them start trading in Beleriand again. That's hardly Scrooge Mcduck.

- Another thing we can say about canonthir (lol) is that he apparently attaches a lot of value to aesthetics (was he a visual artist? is a he a sculptor like Nerdanel? WORSE: AN ART CRITIC?! Feanorian art critic is truly nightmare fuel) and that's why he dislikes Dwarves (of all things...). Either way points to 'aesthetics' as something apparently important to Caranthir. Which makes sense given who his parents are. What is interesting to me is that this apparently DOESN'T matter to Curufin, who is a lot like Feanor in most things. That's interesting!

I've never, never seen this but I think it would be very funny to attribute his aesthetic prejudices to Nerdanel. I love her; but why should her opinions be perfect? I know she wasn't considered beautiful herself, but she's an artist. She's got to have had some strong opinions on aesthetics anyway. I doubt it's the beards; Mahtan had one as well. And 'stunted'...at least some of this comes down to the Elvish obsession with height yet again. Hm.

- eventually Caranthir overcomes what have to be some very deeply held beliefs about human beings and their place in the world, and offers what for all intents and purposes looks like real friendship, not the ruling over Men Feanor seems to have had in mind at best. He's capable of real change!

Anyway his character works just fine to me from canon, and what he achieves and the ways in which he fails are more interesting that way rather-- neither slandered Feanorian Finrod 2.0 nor Curufin 'Dwarf Fan' Feanorion without the sneakiness and murder attempts pack the same punch as a stupidly prejudiced grouchy man doing his best anyway for centuries in this stupid ugly cursed land, eventually changing for the better, opening up-- and being brutally punished for it by the Doom.

Dammit. I hope there's therapy in the Everlasting Darkness.

hm a bit long but that's what I get for trying to gather my thoughts wrt why after considering it a bit transferring Curufin's love for Dwarves to Caranthir is a bit boring to me personally. Though there are still stories that still do it very well.

[absolutebl]

This Week in BL

April 2021 Part 1

Being a highly subjective assessment of one tiny corner of the interwebs.

Ongoing Series - Thai

Second Chance Ep 1 - living up to its name since it looks to be a series of redemption arcs. Launched with a college confession and a broken friendship, then a flash back to them as seniors in high school. Pairings include friends to lovers, nerd/jock, and maybe cafe boss/employee. There’s a lot going on, but it’s still... quiet and sweet. The script is pretty pat but it’s still WAY more watchable than Cupid Coach or Brothers and most of the acting is solid. Ep 1 tropes included: he’s in engineering, wound tending, fast & bicurious. This could turn into what I wanted My Gear & Your Gown to be. Fingers crossed. 

Love Poison 2 Ep 1 & 2 turns out I did watch and report on season 1 (8 eps), season 2 seems equally unmemorable. Thai countryside setting, strong dialect, incomprehensible plot, camp side characters, and ghastly singing. 

Y-Destiny Ep 1 (eng subs?) - opened with the sports romance enemies to lovers (they aren’t going in the teaser order). When the couple got over fighting, the flirting was v cute, but the flipping SPONGE BATH trope had to rear its ugly head. Still, this series is shaping up to be less coy and more frank than most BL, better than expected. It feels, I don’t know, gay-er or something?  *** Sources were correct that each couple is getting (at least) 2 eps, and MDL has been updated to say this is a 15 episode series (not 7). 

Cupid Coach 12 fin - The new Nite was great and should have been a main all along. It felt like we got a tiny nugget of what could have been in about 10 minutes worth of this last ep. It was way too slow with terrible editing and a criminally bad script, but at least it ended happy. Mostly, like Friend Forever, I’m just disappointed that these two actors were done dirty by the series. Bad Cupid Coach, no screen caps for you. 

Lovely Writer Ep 6 - breaking news, there’s a het couple I like: toppy bi femme + soft boi = such a good pairing! I know, but this NEVER happens. Meanwhile, Sib’s secret is out, Gene is a bit of a drama queen, and the plot thickens. We half way through.  

Brothers Ep 9 - Kaow had a serious moment of advice giving that was truly lovely. Lots of family dama made this a superior episode to... well... any of the others in this series. Which isn’t saying much. 

1000 Stars Ep 10 fin - at the start this series didn’t grab me the way GMMTV’s last BL, Tonhon Chonlatee, did. But boy did it end 1000x better. Might have given us 2021′s best forehead kiss. I enjoyed the ultra romantic cliff-top reunion kiss, and I LOVED the stinger flirting scene. That was an absolute gift we had no right to expect. This drama is a poster child for finishing on a high note (always focus on that dessert course). Final thoughts? This was FAR more a classic romance than it was BL. There were some BL tropes used but not many and most of them originated in the romance genre not yaoi. A picture perfect ending bumped 1000 Stars much higher up my best-of list than expected. Not sure how often I’ll rewatch it as a whole, but this last episode? I’m probably rewatching it right now. 

Ongoing Series - Not Thai

Dear Uranus (Taiwan GL) Ep 3 fin - I guess that’s it? Okaaaaay  

HIStory 4: Close To You (Taiwan) Ep 3 (AKA Ep 5-6) - we got actual legit gay culture not just BL (always appreciated) from XingSi. I’m starting to find LiCheng’s “show them we fucking” hijinks hilarious rather than annoying (not sure why, maybe I just love a rubber chicken, or maybe it was the STUFFED CORN WITH THE TASSEL that did it). 

-- H4 Moment of RANT --

Tropes included beach trip, there’s only one bed, cook for him, baby is a floppy drunk, carry baby to bed, and.... drunk non-con. Whoopdedoo. Here we go again. Did TharnType teach us NOTHING? (Apparently it taught us if the chemistry is good enough, I have no morals at all.) At least H4 seems to be taking us out of cheese into serious when it comes to assault. Or is it? 

I take back what I said last week about XingSi & YongJie being codependency + salvation trope, that only works if YongJie is the uke. He’s NOT. So we got us an obsessive predatory villain with a possible redemption arc. That’s more common in crime dramas, mafia romance, and epic fantasy than BL. It’s real hard to redeem a sexual predator in a reality-grounded universe like contemporary romance (See Kla in LBC1&2). 

Next week is gonna be a test of the whole damn franchise. Imma remind both me a you that this was ep 3 of 10 so we got a ways to go yet... but ooof, what have we wrought, BL? (I ended up doing a whole post about the stepbrother trope because of this sub plot.) Taiwan is killing me.

-- RANT ended --

Word of Honor (China) Ep 19-21 - over half way point so we got ALL the back story (in a classic 4 act story structure midway reveal). Now we know who WKX really is and his lineage. We also got some cute hugs and hand holds. Moving along at a nice clip despite being 36 eps total. Still gayest thing to come out of we-not-gay China since Advance Bravely. 

Most Peaceful Place (Vietnam) Ep 2 - takes them a while to get eng subs together and ep 2 didn’t drop until late. So I’m putting this in a Thurs time slot going forward. Miscommunication already cleared up and a 2nd couple has been introduced. The pacing on these Vietnamese BLs is always a bit... off. But it’s still better than most of its ilk, enjoyable. I’m thinking it’s a 6 ep arc. 

We Best Love 2 (Taiwan) Ep 5 - after the initial drama DRAMA of ep 2, the current external crisis at work is much quieter, giving this whole season a top heavy feel. Taken along side the first season, I think it’s fitting nicely into a 4 act structure, but that might be my bias. I hope I’m not wrong, we’ll find out next week. Shi De puttering about being domestic with Shu Yi on his back was the best execution of the piggyback trope EVER. Meanwhile, our little D/s side couple of codependency, salvation trope + mental illness is becoming weirdly appealing. I don’t know. H4 done mess with my head. 

Stand Alones 

Absolute BL AKA Zettai BL ni Naru Sekai vs Zettai BL ni Naritakunai Otoko  (Japan) Ep 1-4 mini series. Found subs under A Man Who Defies The World of BL. IT’S HILARIOUS. It’s Japan making fun of us, but also itself for having started this whole BL nonsense - from yaoi roots to present day. It’s parody goddamn gold. Utterly cheeky unto the very last line. We are not worthy. 

Apparently the most powerful tropes of all time are: baby is a floppy drunk and the piggyback fo nobility. Oh and chocolate. {Full review here.} 

Honestly, this show may have been made with only @heretherebedork and I in mind. I don’t know if you’d even understand half of it if you don’t have a history with the manga source genre and an obsessive interest in underlying narrative devices. I haven’t seen much chatter in the blog’o’sphere on this one because, in the end, it’s not a romance at all, it’s social commentary. 

The ending line was a masterclass in lampooning a genre. I’m going to rewatch the whole thing just to catch all the digs I missed first time around. It is a thing of beauty and a joy forever. 

Thank you Japan. I forgive you all your hair-styling sins of the last decade. 

Breaking News 

Spring Line Up:

Scholar Ryu’s Wedding Ceremony AKA Nobleman Ryu’s Wedding (Korean historical BL) April 15th 

Close Friend the series (Thai trailer) April 22. 

2gether the movie (Thai trailer) April 22 to Thai theaters.

Nitiman (Thai) May 7 on One31.

I Told Sunset About You 2 (Thai) May 27 on LineTV

Ossan’s Love (Hong Kong) June to Viu 

Gossip 

Bad Buddies released its first promo op via Arm Share, which means GMMTV is at least *thinking* about filming it. 

Fun behind the scenes gossip sesh with eng subs for Tell the World I Love You (that Perth Bas movie we are maybe getting someday but will likely be sad). 

New Thai BL Bite Me (adapted from novel Grab a Bite) dropped a teaser. It stars Mark Siwat (Kla in LBC) as uke character Ake, a delivery boy with special foodie powers, and chef Eua (seme played by Zung Kidakorn) who discovers him. It’s from the same author as Manner of Death so we might even get some actual plot. Since it’s an established BL actor who I happen LOVE, a known author, and a plot about FOOD, I could not me more excited for this one. 

Next Week Looks Like This:

Some shows may be listed a day later than actual air date for accessibility reasons. Some are dropping multiples at a time but just started so I’m not sure on numbering. 

Upcoming 2021 BL master post here.

Links to watch are provided when possible, ask in a comment if I missed something.

[twow]

okay guys i am officially done with my first real week of law school so here's law school update #2!! tbh its been a really fun time! people here are so nice, ive been to the bars the last couple of nights and out of the 6 drinks i've had 5 of them have been bought for me by guys in the law school section LMAO. i didn't go out at all in undergrad so its been a nice change of pace! school is a bit overwhleming and i feel a bit lost but i am kind of getting the hang of it? we'll have to see how next week goes. the rest is under the cut bc i got kind of ramble-y and its long!

okay so for my friend group i simultaneously feel more ingrained in the group and like an outsider. i really love them and we've all gone out together a lot but i cant shake the feeling that's there's an inner circle i'm not a part of idk. i know its probably just insecurity and high school trauma and also the unshakeable feeling that i am unknowable and cannot and should not be my true self around people (with the exception of my irl besties from undergrad ofc). i am hoping that horrible feeling passes and i honestly just can't wait to get out of the beginning parts of the friendship and into the part where i actually feel like i know these people well. esp with this handful of girls I've been getting close to! but yeah ngl i am feeling a bit mixed right now since there's a lot of guys in our group and I've never really had guy friends? there's this sort of ugly feeling like im less important to them bc im not hot like the rest of the girls in the group which is :/// we also sort of had some drama last night so i guess what everyone said about law school being like high school is true LMAOO anyway we are going to the beach today so hopefully things will work itself out.

i also feel like i really embarrassed myself the last couple of nights while drunk. everyone has reassured me that i didn't but still i really really hate the feeling of not remembering exactly what i did/said. shoutout to the girlies and also my friend scott for making me feel a lot better about it <3 anyway in general my mood is very "is everyone hanging out without me?" and "do people secretly dislike me and don't really care about me?" even tho i have evidence to the contrary. mental illness.

edit: okay I've thought about it and the best way to concisely articulate how i feel is that i feel like an afterthought. like ill be invited to places and people will talk to me/hang out with me but i am never the first one on people's mind nor do people really care if i do/do not come. and when im chatting its more like "oh i guess ill talk to her" and im initiating a lot rather than people coming up to me and really wanting to talk to me. and that's fine i guess it just a bit hurtful esp when you see others who do get actually approached for convos and have people upset when they don't come places.

i am also realizing that this post was pretty negative but i AM having a good time and i DO like my friends. I'm just sick of the beginning part i love having really good friends that I'm super close to and i don't really have that yet. its been super fun tho esp at bar trivia and all of my theme park visits

okay update over, thanks for listening to my rambling guys! it really helps me to write all of my feelings out even if no one really cares. that is what a blog is for i guess! also if i know you in real life and you reading this No You Did Not lol

[morganaspendragonss]

(please ignore the really ugly banner thingy my editing app stopped working and this was what i was left with)

anyway! if you've been anywhere near my blog lately you'll have seen that i'm doing a writing challenge this summer. it's entirely self-imposed and probably ill-advised but, as the banner states, it's my 20th birthday in august, i recently hit 1.5k on here, i am officially halfway through my degree — in short, there's a lot to celebrate, and what better way than with a fic prompt challenge!

introducing: holly's 20th birthday august extravaganza!

last month, i put out a call for prompts and you guys were amazing in your response. i am going to be posting 31 fics in august, one each day, all of which have been prompted by someone on here. with the exception of two birthday fics, the order has been decided entirely randomly using a number generator.

(note: i have received more than 31 prompts — i promise all requests will be filled, so do not worry if you submitted a prompt and it doesn't turn up in the challenge. it will get written. further, this in no way means prompts are closing. i love receiving them and as long as my bio says they are, requests ARE open 😊)

this is a multi-fandom event in a very loose sense. most fics will be for 911 lone star, but there will be appearances from the umbrella academy, bbc atlantis, doctor who, and the witcher (i believe 5/31 of the fics are non-lone star).

thank you once again to everyone who submitted a prompt! i am having so much fun writing them all and i hope you all enjoy reading them!

tagging some friends and also anyone who requested anything (off anon) below the cut (not expecting anything, just letting you know what's going on ���)

@trkstrnd @pragmaticoptimist34 @laelipoo @221bsunsettowers @fanfic-corner @ilovemosss @anyotherheartwilldo @freddieholic @girlwhowasntthere @moviegeek03 @silvarafael @marjansmarwani @reyesstrand @reyescarlos @reyeslonestar @lire-casander @rafael-silva @bellakitse @howtosingit @carlosreyess @halsteadmarchs @ourdiningroom @sunshinestrand @aliceschuyler

[eretzyisrael]

An extinguished, precious life remembered in Melbourne

Twenty years ago we started the endless process of adjusting to life without our delightful first-born daughter Malka Chana - Malki to her friends - stolen from us before she reached her sixteenth birthday.

Our copy of the Melbourne Herald-Sun's front page report on August 11, 2001 isdamaged. We are trying to acquire a repairedimage.

It wasn't an illness or a tragic accident that removed Malki from the warm embrace of those who loved her. It was a gang of ideology-crazed thugs led by a chillingly satanic Jordanian woman, armed with a powerful explosive package disguised as a human being, an Arab man in his twenties, and egged on by millions of backers.

Those millions still exert a deeply painful influence on our lives.

We scan the Arabic social media six days a week. This week on the day of the twentieth anniversary we saw - though we didn't need it - plenty of evidence of how utterly different the world in which they live their lives is from ours in this generations-long war of terror.

It's a war that Arabs launched against against Jews in Palestine long before the name Palestine was appropriated by the Arab side. And decades before the State of Israel announced its existence as new-born state on the 1948 day the British Mandate ended and six Arab armies invaded.

A random selection of some deeply hostile and ugly anniversary messages appearing on Twitter (minus the links - we have interest in giving these people any traffic or attention):

Today marks the twentieth anniversary of Operation Sbarro carried out by the martyr Izz Al-Din Al-Masri in Jaffa Street in occupied Jerusalem with the help of the liberated captive Ahlam Al-Tamimi in retaliation for the martyrdom of the two leaders Gamal Selim and Jamal Mansour [Arabic]

..A martyrdom operation in the Sbarro restaurant in Jerusalem which led to the deaths of 20 Zionists and the wounding of 100 [Arabic]

We do not want to forget the liberated captive, Ahlam Al-Tamimi, who carried the attacker of the Sbarro restaurant, Izz Al-Din Al-Masri, to the restaurant after which she was arrested by the occupation army [Arabic]

Prepare it for them in the manner of the people of Aqaba and serve it [pizza] hot and delicious. Al-Masri [the name of the human bomb], go through here. Occupied Jerusalem August 9, 2001 [Arabic]

Proud of our representative from the family in the heroic operation. The liberated captive, Ahlam Al-Tamimi, who transported the martyr Izz Al-Din Al-Masri and handed him a guitar stuffed with maddening death [Arabic - posted by a male with the surname Tamimi]

...Al-Masri was killed on the responsibility of the Jews and their responsibility is extensive [Arabic]

If her parents hadn’t chosen to become foreign invaders she’d probably be alive now

My argument is with the creation of an apartheid theocratic state created by the West (mostly by the US and Britain) in Palestine largely so Jews wouldn't immigrate to the US. I'm a Jew not an Israeli Zionist. She should never have been put in this position by her dad.

We saw no Arabic messages condemning or criticizing Tamimi or the massacre. They might exist and we're just not seeing them, but the truth is we have been looking for years and not finding.

Malki, like her father, was born in Australia. The current edition of the Australian Jewish News, a weekly community-focused newspaper, ran this editorial on Thursday. It's reprinted with the permission of its editor, Zeddy Lawrence.

‘A precious life extinguished’

"THE Australian Jewish community was in mourning this week," reported The AJN 20 years ago, on Friday, August 17, 2001. "The death of 15-year-old Malki Roth in the Sbarro bombing catapulted Israel's crisis into personal grief for much of this community."

Fifteen innocent people were killed in the terrorist attack just a few days earlier, when a guitar case packed with nails was detonated at the central Jerusalem pizza restaurant. Among the victims were seven people aged between just two and 16. Scores of other diners were wounded.

Reflecting on the death of his daughter at the time, Arnold Roth told The AJN, "This was the extinguishing of a precious life."

Ahlam Aref Ahmad Al-Tamimi, who masterminded the attack and drove the bomber to the restaurant, was apprehended by Israel soon afterwards and sentenced to 16 life terms in an Israeli jail. But in 2011, she was one of more than 1000 Palestinian prisoners freed in exchange for the release of Gilad Shalit, who had been held hostage in Gaza for five years.

Since that time, Tamimi has lived in Jordan, feted as a celebrity, and expressing her joy at the high death toll the Sbarro bombing inflicted.

Determined to bring her back to justice, Arnold and his American-born wife Frimet have long called for her to be extradited to the US, as Malki and another victim held American citizenship.

A warrant was issued, but insisting the extradition treaty between the countries was never ratified, Jordan has never acted on it.

The latest evidence, however, appears to show that the treaty was indeed signed.

With that in mind, as the community marks 20 years since Malki's death, the Roths are hoping their sustained campaign may bear fruit.

Pressure is mounting within Washington for the US to withhold foreign assistance from Jordan, and they're urging the Australian government – who they claim have been reticent to speak out – to also take a stand.

Twenty years on, we share their hope that the authorities, both here and Stateside, will take action, so that the unrepentant, bragging terrorist who has Malki's blood on her hands will soon be back behind bars, where she belongs.

The same AJN edition carried this article by senior journalist Peter Kohn:

Still seeking justice for Malki Roth

ON the 20th of Av this year (July 29), Arnold and Frimet Roth visited the Israeli grave of Malki Roth and recited Kaddish. It was their daughter’s yahrzeit – 20 years after the Australian-born teenager was murdered in a Palestinian terrorist attack at a Jerusalem pizzeria, along with 15 others, including seven children.

“Life was heavy,” Malki’s father told The AJN this week, reflecting on the yahrzeit. “You’re missing somebody desperately and feel awful about the fact that she’s not part of your life.”

But this Monday, August 9, the secular anniversary of Malki’s killing, Roth was back on Zoom and on the phone continuing his relentless campaign to see Ahlam Tamimi, the mastermind of the attack, extradited from Jordan to the US. “The ninth of August … that’s all about justice,” he stated.

Tamimi had picked out the Sbarro pizzeria targeted by her and another bomber on August 9, 2001, her accomplice dying in the attack. Tamimi left the scene disguised as a tourist, later professing her glee as the ever-rising death toll was reported.

Although sentenced in Israel to 16 consecutive life terms, she was exchanged in a 2011 prisoner swap to free Israeli soldier Gilad Shalit from Hamas captivity. She continues to be feted as a media celebrity in Jordan, and, according to Roth, she recently added a regular newspaper column to her stint as a Jordanian TV show host.

In the US, she faces charges relating to the death of two American citizens – Malki, who held dual citizenship, being one of them – and an extradition request was issued in 2017.

But four years on, Roth is still battling three governments to get Tamimi extradited.

For years, the US had maintained its hands were tied because Jordan had not ratified its extradition treaty, a position stated by a Jordanian court in 2017. However, in 2019, Roth learned from an American official that Jordan had indeed ratified the treaty as far back as 1995.

Last year, under US freedom-of-information laws, he even received an archived letter from Jordan’s former monarch King Hussein to the US State Department confirming that fact. He is hopeful this legal development will provide a much needed stepping stone.

Desperate for the Australian government to weigh in, Roth’s entreaties to Malcolm Turnbull when he was PM did not bear fruit. Approaches to Prime Minister Scott Morrison last year were referred to Foreign Minister Marise Payne, whose office cited constitutional problems in Jordan with extraditing its nationals, an assertion Roth rejects because oddly “it goes beyond what the Jordanians say”.

In Israel meanwhile, Roth says his fight to have Tamimi extradited to the US has been “betrayed by a chain of Netanyahu governments and, so far at least, by the new government. Of course, Israel could do something. But Israel has no charges against this woman. Israel has washed its hands of the case.”

Roth’s growing perception is that justice for Malki has become expendable to higher policy priorities in Jerusalem, Washington and Canberra.

“There’s a lot of group-think going on – among Israelis, among Americans, among media people,” he said, describing Tamimi as “the most wanted female fugitive alive today”.

The Roths maintain their ties to the families of other victims of the Sbarro bombing, particularly to a victim who remains “in a vegetative state”, he said.

Arnold remains honorary chair of the Malki Foundation, established in his daughter’s memory to support children with disabilities. Malki had been a caring, loving companion to her severely disabled younger sister and others with special needs.

“A 15-year-old girl who had a legacy – it’s unbelievable, but she did,” exclaimed Roth. “She was so good, so empathetic, so involved in making the world better for children with special needs.”

This blog isn't a memorial to our daughter. That function belongs to the website of the Malki Foundation (www.kerenmalki.org). We hope you will visit it.

In the context of terrorism and the worldwide efforts to defeat it, we write here at the site you are now visiting about our efforts to bring Malki's killers to justice - in particular Ahlam Tamimi. the Jordanian orchestrator of the massacre at Sbarro twenty years ago.

Tamimi, now 41 years old and a celebrity in the Arab world, lives free and famous in her homeland despite being the world's most woman female fugitive with a $5M reward issued by the US State Department for her capture and conviction.

One valuable way to give us your support is to sign our petition at change.org/ExtraditeTamimi