#practice diary

[douxettriste]

Practice Diary (6/23/24)

Worked on the Exposition of Beethoven’s Piano Sonata No. 5 in C Minor (Op. 10, No. 1) today. I am happy with how it’s coming along. :~)

[luthienne]

Née au milieu de ce torrent Mais cette étrange mélodie Passa, rapide comme un son. Par les flots la robe alourdie Bientôt dans l'abîme profond; Entraîna la pauvre insenée Laissant à peine commencée Sa mélodieuse chanson.

[gorjee-art]

a comic about cuddles

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

A fierce duel commences!

[dryya-doesnt]

Minecraft diaries but I need an excuse to practice drawing musculature and body types based on combat style

Clearly there is no favoritism here.

Reasoning behind this actually runs deeper than just drawing hot people unfortunately…

Garroth’s a tank, high defense, built for defensive combat — I like to think that he was trained also in the Ro'meave combat style plus guard academy, but switched to a more defensive combat style once settling down in a small town like Phoenix drop.

Laurance is similar in build to Garroth thanks to guard training, but he's quick on his feet and agile. His mobility has been permanently enhanced post shadow knight transformation, and his instincts are also heightened (SK but also his brief period of blindness)

Katelyn is broad — simply because her combat style focuses more on hand to hand / close range combat. Thus her upper body strength likely is more prominent in her design. She just really likes punching things.

[parisoonic]

[shevr]

[plasticsandwich]

girls season ↓

secret kitty unlock.........

[sameboot]

Murderbot + fashion

[lottee-e]

In my feelings 💕

[julykings]

by candlelight

[aflockofravens]

I literally gasped outloud when I realized Maomao's long con with the red manicures.

I can't wait for next week. GET HIS ASS, MAOMAO

[luthienne]

Après d’un torrent, Ophélie Cueillait, tout en suivant le bord, Dans sa douce et tendre folie, Des pervenches, des boutons d’or, Des iris aux couleurs d’opale, Et de ces fleurs d’un rose pâle, Qu’on appelle des doigts de mort. Puis élevant sur ses mains blanches Les riants trésors du matin, Elle les suspendait aux branches, Aux branches d’un saule voisin. Mais, trop faible, le rameau plie, Se brise, et la pauvre Ophélie Tombe, sa guirlande à la main.

[vegaseatsass]

My Stand-In Episode 10

Just a few scattered notes of things I have on my mind.

I have been very very very obsessed with the moment where Joe breaks up with Ming after Ming's mom went in on them. See, originally I took Joe at his word: He's tired. He's tired of the constant melodrama, the neverending battle just to exist. Ming and his family already killed Joe once, he just wants some quiet contentment and to not feel like he's fighting for his life every time he holds his boyfriend's hand. Honestly, I really loved that, that their breakup this episode wasn't a contrived fight full of blame and accusation, but was simply Joe realizing he's too exhausted and walking away.

But then it hit me like a load of bricks, that no, actually. Joe didn't end things in that moment because he wants peace and quiet. He left before Ming could hurt him again. He left because he didn't believe Ming would stand up to his mother or his family - or more like, he didn't want to let himself start hoping he could, and get disappointed. Since the funeral, Ming has been giving Joe everything he ever wanted Ming to give him and more (I mean if you don't count "respecting his boundaries" as something Joe wants but 1. Ming is kiiiinda starting to get there by the end of this ep lmao? 2. I'm talking about everything Joe wants to feel from Ming on a visceral level, more than what would make his relationship safe and sane). Ming has been telling Joe over and over again that he loves him, showing Joe over and over that he chooses him, showing Joe at every turn that Tong is nothing to him. No matter how much Joe or Ing push Ming or test Ming, Ming just keeps coming back and reaffirming his commitment to Joe, adapting to who Joe is now and offering him anything and everything he can give, sincerely, determinedly vowing to put him first. Joe has been trying so hard not to let himself want it or believe in it, but by the time they're in that meeting room with Ming's mom, he is back in honeymoon mode with Ming, truly starting to believe he gets to have the kind of relationship (two-sided. equal. where Joe is taken care of and spoiled and chased, not just the caretaker and spoiler and chaser) it used to feel too greedy to dare hope for.

And then Ming's mom reminds him of how easy (Joe thinks) it will be for Ming to pull the rug out from under him again, and send it all crashing down. Just like in his first life in honeymoon mode, when he realized Ming was here for Tong and not him, that this relationship that was making him feel so whole and safe was all a lie.

Like with something as big as breaking with a family that will never accept his sexuality, Joe has no instinct to "test" Ming or give him an ultimatum. I don't actually think it's with real disappointment in Ming himself that Joe gives up on Ming choosing him before Ming even gets the chance to try. I think Joe is probably completely sympathetic to the choice he expects Ming to make, and intellectually, doesn't begrudge it of him, the way he would (or should) begrudge so many of the actual terrible things Ming has done to him. But it still hurts so much to have reality force its way into their bubble, and remind Joe that even Ming trying his absolute hardest can't protect Joe from feeling that crushing loss again. So he takes himself away from the situation before it has the opportunity to hurt him again.

Idk if I'm getting at why I'm so obsessed with this, but there's just something to me about how happy Joe must have been feeling at Ming's side, to need to proactively remove himself from the situation to avoid getting his heart shattered like those mugs. Like "I'm tired" means "I can't do these high-lows anymore. I can't feel this good and have it taken away again." This is exactly why he's been trying so so so hard to freeze his heart around Ming: So he's not vulnerable to the particular kind of hurt he never recovered from in his first life.

And I just find it very moving that the source of that hurt this time isn't Ming making disastrous choices. It's something neither Ming nor Joe has control over. And Joe knows that! But it still hurts too much to hope and want things.

Meanwhile, Ming is like: Hope and want whatever you want, beloved. I am now Mr. Makes Shit Happen. I can do anything as long as you're alive in this world.

Which is another thing I've been thinking a lot about. Sol and Ming both trying to make themselves into these superperson supershields so things will be Different This Time, and smacking up against some natural end limits to their abilities. For Sol, no matter how hard he turns himself upside down trying to make himself into someone Joe can pick instead of Ming, the attraction will never be there, and Ming always WILL be there, reminding Joe of his feelings for him. For Ming, the limit on his absolutely determined devotion to Joe is his family. And Sol and Ming, both trying so hard to be bigger and more than they are, when they come face to face with their limit still refuse to back down. No matter how laughably futile it is.

To me, Ming standing there looking all tiny at the bottom of the stairs with his dad looming at the top is the equivalent of how manically out of his element trying to do the impossible Sol was in episode 9. But just like Sol, Ming can't stop now. No matter what happens in episode 11, Ming has to try to fight this impossible fight. Neither of them is willing to leave anything on the table after losing Joe once before.

Idk I wonder if they will have to work together before the end hahaha... we'll see.

I had more thoughts but this is once again a monster post so I will end by simply reiterating how amazing and hilarious I think it is that Tong tried to get Ming to pay him HUNDREDS OF MILLIONS OF BAHT for the privilege of removing the only source of happiness from his life. Like come to the meeting room, Ming! Let's make a deal where you go back to being depressed and alone, and give me all the money I want! Surely this will work out in a way where we can both walk out satisfied! The lion the witch and the audacity of this bitch <3 <3 <3 <3

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

Teehee! (Spritesheets your Wangxian)

[laatmaar]

A piece I started after finishing exit strategy. Wanted to use my markers again! Also black and white version under the cut!