#ppl who do don't know how to act right over here. i can always tell when someone is from over theredksjdsk

[pinkhysteria]

desperately need tiktok not to crumble, i cannot risk tvdu tiktok migrating over here...

[dyemelikeasunset]

I can't sleep so I'm venting. for the most part i love my d&m readers, but oml sometimes i get qpoc blues so bad 😭😭

It's just liiiike. ppl either don't talk about Mor or completely misinterpret her personality. Like I can always tell if my readers are black or not because nonblack readers no NOT see Mor's significance, or just miss the mark when they talk about her, or they misread her personality. Like I don't understand what's so hard to understand about a cute and thoughtful artist??

AND LIKE LMAO Dom's sexuality gets brought up all the time but no one talks about Mor being a lesbian and how rare that is to find in media 😭 white lesbians are always talking about "we need more open lesbians in media!! ppl shouldn't be afraid to use the word lesbian!! blah blah" and i'm like "here you go!!" and no one claps at all lmao. Like I get it, i know why it happens, i understand racial microaggressions, i know how fandom spaces treat Black women, I UNDERSTAND BUT I CAN STILL BE UPSET. I have the right to be upset about it!!! 💀💀 And I know fem lesbians get ignored all the time, invalidated all the time, but it just sucks to see it happen to my character. I just feel like her being lesbian doesn't clock a lot of people, and I get asked to do more thirst trap art of Mor and I do want to but i'm also trying to be careful about like. Idk reducing a dark skinned fem lesbian to being validated only thru being sexy? LMAO.... Mor should be able to be attractive and lovable without tons and tons of thirst trap art (and it's not like I don't do it at all!! I'm not trying to be overprotective or deny her sexiness but I guess it's considered not enough?? give me a break)

And mannnn I was so mad actually that several comments voiced thoughts that essentially said Mor didn't "help" or "take care" of Dom enough, and that when Dom was finally opening up to her it was "Morgan finally doing something" LIKE HELLO??? HELLO??? It's DOM'S flaw that she can't open up? And Morgan does a lot??? I know immature ppl do not appreciate more soft and domestic/feminine forms of care bc they're used to taking their mothers for granted lmao but wooow I was taken aback. First of all, like, I try to show that Mor is the main cook, works just as much as Dom (let's go double income household), is always checking in on Dom's comfort as she navigates being queer, and is overall a very considerate girlfriend. AND SECOND OF ALL LMAO like even if she didn't do all that she doesn't need to have relationship currency to have a doting girlfriend, like the fucking trope of black women needing to suffer for love is so terrible I'VE HAD ENOUGH AND i"M NOT EVEN BLACK. Like there is NOTHING WRONG with their typical dynamic and I'm sick of people acting like there is. SOMEONE SAID DOM WAS LIKE A COMFORT PILLOW W NO AGENCY AND i"M LIKE WTFDYM???? She has TONS of agency and her sense of agency says she wants to LOVE AND DOTE ON HER PARTNER LIKE LMAO. WHAT?? Why is that hard to understand??? Is it because I made one (1) joke bout Mor being a pillow princess and the anti-princess squad are grinding their teeth in the bushes seething over it? Ppl are so twisted sometimes oh my goddddd. Like as an ace who was very confused navigating the lesbian dating scene as a teen and young adult I WISH i had met a pillow princess. Sometimes ppl don't realize that stone dynamics are very safe for aces!! Dom literally says she prefers it!! It's not Mor being selfish like lord please GOD ALLAH I'M TIRED I'M SO TIRED

and like on the topic of Domi overall she is more "popular" but sometimes I feel like people don't even really take the time to appreciate the significance about her either. She's not just a funny thirst trap 😭 and I feel like ppl dont acknowledge that she's asian half the time. I have so many white aces who only zone in on that aspect of her and it's like YEAH I GET IT, I'm ace and we don't have a lot of nuanced rep but she's also got more layers than that too. Tons of people related to her in the chapters where she talks about her childhood abuse yet very few people really, like, talked about the type of generational trauma that is very deeply embedded in her different cultures, no one saw that and oooof idk idk it felt inivisible. It's sometimes harder to talk about the racist microaggressions that Domi experiences thru my readers bc ppl will argue "well most webtoon leads are asian" but not many of them are asian in a way that like. talk about it. I'm born in the US so my experiences with being othered as an asian is just gonna be different and it's gonna affect my art and writing but it feels so unappreciated. I've had some queer asians relate to her but i can count them on my hand 💀 (I actually think it's two LMAO i"M SO SAD)

And going back to Dom and the comfort pillow w no agency comment lmao. This is another thing that rubs me the wrong way is once again, people are ignorant to the ways asians get pigeon-holed to media roles that have us being depicted as incapable. Maybe I want Dom to be more of a protector archetype bc I'm tired of meek Asian women in media? 🤔 Maybe I want Dom to be a prince-like character because asians get emasculated a lot?? 🤔🤔 Maybe I want Domi to maintain her prince persona instead of being "'physically' androgynous/masculine but really soft and girly on the inside uwuwu please treat me like a 'real' girl" because even in east asian media we won't allow women to exhibit strength and dependability??? 🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔 Like why is a tough girl empowering but once we have a gentle and doting personality in a romance it's considered cliche and the flaw of her partner for being "too weak." MAYBE THEIR PRINCE/PRINCESS DYNAMIC COMPLIMENT EACH OTHER??? HAVE YOU CONSIDERED? I WROTE THEM THAT WAY FOR A REASON??

Good lord this turned into an essay but I have so many things on my mind always

if you read this all. Thanks. I mainly needed to scream into a towel and put this down somewhere bc I complain about these issues to my discord and they understand/validate me all the time, but I wanna give them a break 😭 I also lowkey wanna document my various feelings as I work through Dom & Mor so I can remember and also grow from it

[streussal]

i 100% agree with u about the fight, my question is why do you think they even included that scene? i don't feel like it tells us anything we don't already know & it gives ppl who dont remember the original scene opportunity to believe louis was the aggressor.. don't know how to feel about it to be frank

I got this ask after I made this post. Responding almost 4 days later so I don't know if the anon will see this, but I have some thoughts.

First of all, no matter how strongly a piece of media demonstrates who is the bad guy in a situation, there's always going to be people who side with the abuser, ESPECIALLY if the abuser is a white male and the victim is anyone other than a white male. Louis straight up said in the scene (LESTAT'S VERSION) "like you wrapped your hands around our daughter's neck" so it's pretty clear he's responding to Lestat attacking Claudia. On stage, Lestat goes off script and insists that it was wrong of him to drop Louis from the sky, and that afterwards Louis was "a broken thing. I know, I saw, because I am the one that broke him". He then follows this with the admission that he did it because Louis hurt his feelings, not because of any threats or violence from Louis: “I couldn’t persuade him to return my affections. I could force him to love me. And so, I broke him.” If people don't get that Lestat was in the wrong here, I don't think there's anything else the writers can do.

As for why I think the show gave us that scene:

Playing around with different points of view is neat, and showing different recollections of the same event is a recurring thing in this show. (I'm torn on whether this is Lestat's actual recollection or just something the coven added to make Louis look bad - see my interpretation that Lestat is being coerced into participating in the trial - but either way it plays into one of the themes of the series.) Yes showing the POV of an abuser could backfire if it falls into victim blaming but I think the show handled it very well (and there is a portion of the audience that is always going to see Lestat as the victim even when he straight up says he was the bad guy in a situation).

It shows Louis physically protecting Claudia AND prioritizing her over Lestat. One of the major criticisms of Louis is his failure to do either of these things, so I actually think it made a lot of people like him better. Most of the twitter reactions I saw, from people who accepted the scene as 100% fact, was people talking about how great it was that Louis was ready to kill the guy who hurt his daughter.

It allows Jacob Anderson to do something different! One of the reasons I'm suspicious of this version of events with Louis cackling is that I have not seen Louis act quite like that before. But Jacob definitely sold it! Makes me wonder if maybe this is yet another side of Louis! I don't know! It adds rewatch value.

The acknowledgement that Lestat dropping Louis from the sky really did do long term damage to Louis. Not just physically. He became "a broken thing" - there was serious psychological damage. After he got back together with Lestat, we never really saw him push back against Lestat again. A lot of his time in Paris is a reaction against being in an abusive relationship. (And then he gets in another one, which happens a lot in real life.)

But I think it's also significant that right after this scene, we saw Lestat's remorse. And a much more real apology than anything we saw in s1. Now obviously this does not fix anything. (Claudia highlights this - "Can I cry and say sorry too?" - She and Louis tried to kill Lestat and are on trial, Lestat nearly kills Louis and just gives an apology.) But it gives the possibility that perhaps Lestat has changed or realized that he needs to change. And given that the showrunner has repeatedly referred to Loustat as the central love story of the series (link)... we need to see that Lestat is not going to do the same thing again. We want him to be better for Louis. Not that it would ever be an entirely healthy relationship (they are vampires), but not "drop him the sky requiring months of recovery" level awful. (@awildwickedslip wrote an interesting post relating to this here)

[kevin-the-bruyne]

TW: explicit discussion of suicide

(ID: Screenshot of Ray in ep4 saying to Sand "A burden to society" after he tells Sand to scold him and insult him) I cannot for the love of everything that is holy get this moment out of my head. Because the way he says it - with this deep fondness and affection - makes me want to want to chew my own fingers down to the bone. Because after that absolutely earth shattering intro where this happens:

(ID: Screenshot of Ray from ep4 where he calls Mew from the bathroom saying "If I'm gone, I won't be anyone's burden anymore, right?) one would assume that Ray wouldn't take being called a burden very well, certainly wouldn't grow an emotional attachment to someone who has called him that multiple times, has expressed his irritation over Ray's clinginess upfront.

And yet that is exactly what happened. So the question is - why? I've seen multiple ppl talk about this so I feel like I don't need to explain here how Ray's friend group aren't particularly good friends to him. Even Mew, who Ray supposedly loves isn't all that affectionate or understanding towards him. Please read this meta for a breakdown of why and how Mew's response to Ray when he calls him from the brink of suicide and for which Ray is so incredibly grateful for - fell laughably short. Ray who's mother never loved him (and it's likely quite nuanced since she quite obviously committed suicide and I can't even begin to comprehend the heights of fucked up abandonment issues that would wreak on one's child), Ray who is yet to mention his father even once, Ray who tells his friends how much he loves them all the time and literally never hears it back - you know, that guy isn't really looking for a grand love, he isn't waiting for someone to see inside his soul and find something wonderful - he's looking for scraps. Literally anything.

He wants someone to look at him, see inside to his festering, broken, ugly core and still find it worth loving, find it worth saving. And Sand? He does exactly that from like Day 0

(ID: Screenshot of Sand and Ray from ep1 in Sand's bathroom where Sand says "How did you manage to live this long" to a passed out Ray) I had lost my entire mind over this interaction in ep1 because Sand has that exact irritation and affection here that one would feel for a troublesome sibling. Like he doesn't really like Ray here in this moment and he's not very secretly very annoyed at him. But no matter what,he will protect him. Ray isn't awake in the above clip to experience it but it just drives me crazy how Sand is exactly the person that Ray has been waiting for, a person capable of very intense albeit pragmatic love. Someone who can call out Ray's burdens and still love him through it (unlike you know...his so called friends). Yes, there are quite overt parallels between the arc of Ray's feelings for Sand and Mew:

(ID: Screenshot of the RayMew kiss from ep4 and SandRay kiss from Ep2 side by side) look at the arch of his body!!!! my man is always freaking reaching out isn't he!!!!!!

(ID: Screenshot of Ray offering to save Mew from ep4 and Sand from ep3 side by side) But that's where those parallels end because Sand and Mew could not be more different as people and Ray has absolutely no way of comprehending the person that is Sand. Doesn't Ray act a little differently around Sand?

(ID: Screenshot of SandRay from ep3 where Sand says "You just don't take no for an answer, do you, Ray?) Like it's funny when Sand had said this but also...doesn't he? Doesn't Ray take no for an answer quite often? Didn't he take Mew's 'no' two years ago and never pestered him about it again? Didn't even bother to do anything about it when Boston was trying to get in his head about Mew at the party and instead went straight back to making fuck me eyes at Sand. When Mew told him not to fight with Top, didn't he immediately back down? Didn't he let Mew walk away with Top without a fight? Ray hadn't felt the need to confess his feelings again or kiss Mew for two years, not until he sees Mew in Sand's POOR BOY shirt. Ray can't stay away from Sand, doesn't have a single clue as to what it is he's feeling for him (please have your life ruined by this gifset) - how could he? How could he possibly know what it feels like to be loved by someone? How could he possibly know what it feels like to love someone?

[joshhutchersonseggsalad]

Tw: long opinion post:)

at this point I'm having a hard time believing these rp accounts are "not minors." Its rlly fucking ridiculous as someone who's an ACTUAL adult looking to interact with other ppl in my fandom and then having to worry if someone is lying about their age right to my face (which has happend to me over 5 times on this app now). There's nothing wrong with interacting with certain ages, I'm talking about the folks who have balls to continue to lie and then try to interact very nsfw with me and my friends who don't appreciate that. There's a fine like between talking about certain topics and being silly (cool idc I was ur age once and made c8 jokes) and then being absolutely gross. We all make mistakes and yes ig it's common for young ppl to lie about their age especially these days, but keep in mind what ur saying to these ppl..imagine how an adult feels when finding out they were actually messaging a 14 year old the whole time. I'm a very forgiving person and don't usually cut ppl out of my life unless they've done me wrong, it's possible others r the same, so there's no reason to be afraid and just be open and honest about ur age at this point, especially if u are role-playing characters and interacting nsfw on a public page. But itd be very valid if an adult mutual were to block u for lying to them and crossing the line multiple times. Honesty, especially about your age, is a mature trait. If u wanna act like an adult, it'd be nice if u atleast had that trait too. Even if u aren't a rp and just a normal account, this applies to u too. Nobody HAS to put their age in their intro/bio but it's def well appreciated by a lot of ppl. Bc also a 15 year old doesn't always want to be talking to a 30 year old (applies to both parties). I understand tumblr is a platform open to anyone, but I think it's important for ppl to realize their spaces and boundaries as well. There are LOTS of young teens on this app who'd love to be friends with other young teens..same goes for adults. If you are under 18 purposely coming on this app to "get freaky" with someone over 18, that's a bit of a problem imo🫤 when it comes to being friends with ppl, it depends on others personal morals and beliefs. For example, I know some 20 year olds who don't mind being friends with a 17 year old, and others who absolutely would not dare to..but it's VERY IMPORTANT to not force a friendship and go against some of those ppls morals by lying about ur age and fooling them when ur actually 16. I've appreciated the very few who have given me proper apologies about the matter privately and proven they'd grow from their mistakes. What bothers me is the rise of young folks putting adult in their bio and thinking they can do as they please with actual adults. We were ur age once. It's not cool having to worry about if one of ur fav mutuals is actually secretly a 15 year old:( if ur gunna sit here and tell me that ppl lying about their age on this app is none of my fucking business, well ig in a way ur right technically, but when it comes to them interacting with me on my accounts, it's hard for me not to have trust issues. Ik it's easy to block but again personally I'm not one to block often, as this app is open to everyone and I'd feel awful if I ended up blocking an ACTUAL adult bc I misunderstood their vibe for a minor:/ and just want to clarify I'm not making this post with like super ill intent and shit. Yes the topic at hand is annoying and stressful when it comes to having trust issues, but there's no need for any negativity. Just know, if ur a minor seeing this post and u r a mutual of mine and u are lying about ur age, u should step up.

thank u for reading.

[minhmynchi]

a lot of rambling; read if you want to lol but i would appreciate having more like-minded people to talk about this with! (tl;dr recently found out i have autism and it's turned my whole world upside down?)

don't know where to start bc this is a very new revelation for me but figured out that i have autism thanks to my gf (she has adhd) pointing out a million things??? and the past two days have just been me going through what i remember of my whole life and being all "oh so That's why i acted like that" or "so That's why i don't like this thing"

like i had an idea a year ago that i might've been neurodivergent but didn't know how, didn't know where to start bc i didn't know much of the signs or symptoms and at the time i didn't talk much to my gf bc we weren't together yet and thus didn't talk like literally every day about everyyyy little thing

but she had been telling me that my brother stacking cans was an autism thing (he's 2 and a half and still hasn't talked yet but hasn't been diagnosed) and i was like "lol but i did that too i thought everyone does that it can't be autism" and she was like "🤨 that's not the gotcha you think it is" and me going "lol sure whatever u say" but in reality i've been thinking about that for a little while lol like what did she mean by that....

and two nights ago we stayed up til 2am my time talking about it bc she was like "you know how you always wear bracelets and you never take them off? yeah, comfort items. you don't like soda bc of the carbonation? that's a texture thing. you also have a million plushies and like holding them when you go to sleep?? guess what, that's right, that's an autism thing" and went on and on and i just kept being like damn . Damn.

like more of a list here, i really really didn't think much of these things bc i thought it was Normal or just a weird little quirk for me bc everyone has weird little quirks right or that it was just an anxiety thing for me lol i didn't know much about autism and now i'm doing my best to research it all

- i don't like certain smells, like my mom gets hand soaps and some of them are really . eugh. visceral reaction from me even tho i used them bc it's still soap i thought i just had to get over it

- i like really basic foods and don't tend to try new things much; i hate cauliflower bc of the texture (i knew autistic ppl had problems w texture in foods but usually i can eat most things..! not that i try a lot of foods! i brushed it off until i remembered this while trying to think of signs that i have autism) i also hate soda and spicy food bc of the textures, otherwise i rly like it lol if they didn't have the textures they have then i would be so good rn

- me being all "oh yeah i just have fixations and stuff everyone has this" (has been deeply into isat for seven months now and feeling like it's dropping off my radar sends me into a slight state of panic if i think about it too much) but my friend who i asked if he noticed anything odd w me had said that me being sooo super duper into isat, he thought it was just a weird thing specific to me bc everyone is a little weird right and also nothing much else stuck out to him bc we also share a lot of anxiety things lol he said it Would make sense if i did have autism and it also would if i didn't but like. i thought uh. everyone was like this!!!! i thought everyone liked things so deeply they made it their entire personality... (having a job is awful bc i keep spending money on things i like... i have sooo many splatoon things and also i've been buying every isat thing and also games and also just a bunch of stuff i hoard and don't even get me started on comms lol i have sooo many ocs and i have phases of ocs i like so i get comms of them bc i start thinking about them out of nowhere......)

- which brings me to my next point; my gf told me ppl w adhd and/or autism usually seek out other ppl just like them but thinking about it, i don't think any of my friend groups are like me, i think 95% of my friends are all nt which is crazy, but then i think about how i'm here on tumblr and i feel comfortable cause everyone deeply likes isat too and i'm like :) yay let's go even tho i'm rly bad at talking to people like reallyyyyy bad i haven't made much new friends i think bc i'm so awful at talking (tho that's also evidence in and of itself isn't it)

- and so many things have gotten past me bc i guess i learned to mask so well i just pass off rly easily as a nt person.. cause i don't do things that make ppl immediately think something's up with me and the only reason my gf has caught this is bc again we talk every day and she has multiple friends w autism so she knows the signs she knows what to look for and it also has taken her this long to figure it out too like she had Suspicions. but didn't voice them bc she wasn't sure until a couple nights ago

and there's soooo many other things too but i already forgor and i wanna make a list to remember them all bc it's so much easier for me to remember things if i write them down

i'm just like siffrin in that i have a sieve-like brain my memory is so very terribly awful lol

but it's so interesting to think about!!! it's so relieving to know that there's actually a reason for like everything and it's not bc i'm broken or just a plain awful person or something

and it's not very noticeable!! i don't do any of the like. "stereotypical" things so no one ever (including me!!!!!) thinks anything of what i do bc i hide my weird things so well i guess

and i want to talk about it more with people!!!! like i said, i don't have many friends who have autism? and the ones i do have it to a degree that i don't i think... but i'm not sure. but i would like to reach out to them soon enough to hear about their experiences and that's why i'm here too!!! cause i want to know more about it bc yes i will have books to read on the matter but i want to know too from hearing from others, especially if one has autism the way i have it... and i'm 26 too which means it literally passed by people as a child and i wonder if i just learned to mask everything over time bc again i don't remember!!! anything!! which sucks lol. and didn't help that i kept being like "lol i can't have autism i don't do any of these things" i just didn't know 🙄 but i didn't know where to start looking, didn't know what could've been a symptom or not but just kept denying it bc my perception of it was very narrow and didn't think to look into it more to be sure.

and i'm not even professionally diagnosed but i've never been more sure of anything in my life now. and also eventually i want to be professionally diagnosed i would like that very much i just have to save up money

but anyways. long post is long enough thanks for reading if you do 🙏 and please please reach out bc idk who i can talk to more about autism i like thinking about it its literally 3:30 am and i have work in two hours but i couldn't stop thinking about wanting to talk to ppl about it!!!!

[yourfav-ashy]

suna rintaro tkl headcanons bc i can

yeah so imma cry bc i just took an hour to make these n it didn't even post right and it isn't here and i'm sad anyway 🙁

tw: none, swearing, might die cuz sunas so cute :)

lee:

-on a scale of 1-10, he's a 5/6 on the tickle scale :) it depends on the spot tbh

-pinches and squeezes to the backs of his thighs get him in hysterics, squeals, cackles, shrieks and all 🥰 his laughter is so angelic though honestly 😭

-the small of his back and the back of his ribs are bad too, like if you drag a finger down his spine he'll either squeak or squeal if his guard is down 😍

-if he's being a little dick, knead ur fingers into the back of his ribs and he'll BEG for you to have mercy, cackling and blushing brightly <3

-lil squeezes to his knees get him giggling too, especially if you do multiple in a row he'll throw his head back in giggles

-the back of his neck and behind his ears are sweet spots too omg if you're his s/o, pepper kisses across those spots and he'll MELT

-he's feather sensitive behind his ears, literally, like tell him you wanna play with his hair, have him sit between ur legs, place a feather behind his ear and he'll squeal and giggle, falling back into your lap. gives you opportunity to scribble over his lil tummy tho, another giggle spot for him. more snickers then giggles though if that makes sense, like more airy giggles.

-compliment him on his pretty smile, he'll love you immediately. he will absolutely melt and blush like the sweetie he is😭😭

-wiggle your fingers at him from across the room, a light little blush will spread across his cheeks and he'll clear his throat, giving you a death glare-- don't be surprised if he gets you later~

(BARK BARK WOOF BARK BARK THIS PHOTO--)

ler:

-this is gonna be long imma sucker for ler Rin'~

-okokok so if atsumus bring a little shit, he'll squeeze and pinch his sides or hips really quickly and briefly as he walks by him, shooting him a glare that says 'if you don't stop/stfu i will end wreck you'

-ok so he teases ppl a little, mostly if you're really close, like a bestie or significant other than he'll tease/tickle you more :)

-if you're friends then he'll scribble across your tummy or sides, smiling a bit at your reaction

-BUT IF YOURE BESTIES

-he'll come up behind you if ur sitting, doing the dishes, idfk you name it and he'll squeeze your sides absolutely vigorously and pinch up your ribs, scratching lightly beneath your bellybutton as he holds you in place with his arms. if he trusts you a lot and you trust him he'll even throw in some nuzzles into the back or sides of your neck, whispering little "tickle tickle~'s or 'such a pretty little smile, it suits the gorgeous little body you're in, cutie~' ANDDDD 'why haven't you said stop yet?- ohhh right~ you love this, don't you, hm? you love these tickle tickle tickles across your cute little tummy, yeah?'

-will make you ask for it if he feels mean lmfao

-'c'mon, you 'n i both know how much ya love the tickles! why not just ask for it? oh? "the word" is too embarrassing to say, hm? so maybe i should say it more often, whad'ya think? tickle tickle tickle~'

-OH MY GOD I GOT SUCH BAD BUTTERFLIES THINKING ABT THAT

-if you're his s/o he'll muzzle his head the way under your shirt and then give you little kisses all over your tummy, and light, gentle little kisses over your bellybutton🥰 occasional nibbles, and really just to drive you crazy, a few raspberries here and there if they really drive you up the wall.

-if you "hate" the raspberries he'll make sure to always lower his head to your tummy or neck and just wait there, to get you giggling in anticipation.

-oh yeah, you wanna tease him with wiggling fingers? he'll do it right back with a straight face. told ya, he'll get you back

-loves to send you innocent little messages like 'im gonna get you when you get home :)' acting all innocent with that smiley emoji 😒

-sometimes with osamu he'll have little challenges, on who gets flustered first and he'll team up with atsumu once AND ONLY ONCE and they'll both message osamu at the same time tkl talking him abt how ticklish his sides are and how he'd go crazy if they just walked their fingers up his ribs

-speaking of!! if he's cuddling with you, and you're both really just relaxed in each others touch, about to fall asleep- hell "walk" his fingers up your ribs verrrryyyyy slowlyyyy, smirking like the little shit he is and snickering as you try to not smile

-if you're brave enough to ask for tickles, he'll willingly give them to you with the sweetest smile and hearts in his eyes as he whispers sweet nothings into your ear, all the while circling your bellybutton and lightly scratching between your ribs, blowing on your ear every once in a while

-if you're friends with him you'd probably have a lot of sleepovers, resulting in tickle fights (and by tickle fights i mean you getting pinned beneath him as he holds your hands above your head, wiggling his fingers above your armpits) and if you try to fight back, expect lots of punches to your hips and many, many, MANY scratches to your tummy :)

-also this fits into the anticipation category, but yk the pic above the 'ler' section? yeah he will 100% wiggle his fingers at you if you ask for tickles wanting you to REALLY ask for it and beg.

-as far as aftercare goes, cuddles. that's all that needs to be said, cuddles. he'll tell you about how pretty/handsome your smile is and how he could listen to your laugh for yours 💞

___________________________________________

if you couldn't tell i'm in love with ler rin💀 anyway that's all, hope you enjoyed :)

i might make a post of smth like the trio reacting to u being in the tk community (atsumu, osamu, suna)

bte @giggly-squiggily ik you like suna, so ill tag you here hope u don't mind <3

byebye ily

[mrs-monaghan]

To that one anon,

I absolutely agree that actively hating on JK is veryyy uncalled for when we can see Jikook doing great and we don't have all the bts information. Lately, though, I've also seen a lot of Jikook accts minimizing what happened to FACE and Jimin. Celebrating JK's achievements is one thing but I cannot stand to see jkks of all ppl downgrading what happened to Jimin and his records as they're broken by the extra push the company gives JK. Everyone is speculating and trying their best to understand things and for some, that's sidelining Jimin as an accessory to make it make sense. There needs to be fair discourse in all sides of this community without romanticizing the darker parts of it. It's not JK's fault and we don't know all, but we still need to be able to talk about it. Like the fact that some of LC's numbers disappeared right when Seven needed space on the Korean charts. The fact that the FACE wasn't restocked for months when seven was in ready supply almost every week. What happened to LC and the rise of Seven is related even on a minor scale. This is a fact. Some accts were so focused on debunking videos, and celebrating JK that the topic of where Jimin's award nominations and streams are going became taboo because apparently "Jimin is happy as a cheerleader" ...what?!

Actively hating is way too far I agree but all I'm saying is we should still be able to talk about the inequality regarding them as individuals and how that relates to Jikook as a whole. Believing in Jikook and discussing these things should not be mutually exclusive. Everyone has their own opinions. Again not supporting the hate, but we should be allowed to share thoughts shouldn't we, regardless if we won't all agree?

No, I dont disagree. But personally talking about it just seems to get people riled up and that's how Jikookers end up resenting JK. I would rather copy paste a PJM on twitter when they are tagging BH and Geffen and anyone else fucking over Jimin.

I haven't 4go10 everything our man has been through. This man has millions of fans and they only released 13k LC cds. Meanwhile other members got up to 50k. His shit not getting restocked even still?? You cannot tell me this is something Jimin would be okay with. His fans wanting to buy his music and not being able to? No way he's just okay with this.

But I also fail to see how he's not aware of it?? He has to be aware of what happened to him.

(New video here for those who are yet to watch it. As always they do Jimin Jimin great justice)

The 🛴 thing is confusing seeing as he's credited on FACE but whatever.

Unfortunately we will never know how he feels or whats going on unless he or one of the members outright tell us about it. The unfairness is so bad if I look at it too much it makes me tear up. I haven't 4go10 he is still the only member who didn't get a cake. I know it's just a cake but damn this always rubs me the wrong way. @magicshop-pjm1 gets it 🤭🤭🤭

All I know anon, which makes me less sad, is the fact that Jimin renewed with Hybe. That has to mean something. And so I will just be here and support him the best way I can. I am choosing to trust his decision here because we are clearly missing something.

I don't post these asks because tbh they are a downer and they make everyone upset. I don't like to be upset. Until we know the truth I would rather avoid the topic all together. But that's just me 😔😔 It doesn't do me any favours.

But yes, Jikookers should be able to discuss whats been going on without being called JK antis. Provided they're not acting like JK antis.

[kuschelkissen]

reverse unpopular opinion: nagano trio

Ppl send topics and instead of salt or hot takes, you MUST talk abt smth you like about it. Good excuse to gush abt smth you already love, OR think and find smth positive to say. 

LMAO what have you done, as if I'm not already gushing over them at any given time during the day 😂

Long post under cut, so you can skip more easily

I'm not even gonna talk about the shipping side of them because you see me gushing over that all the time anyway.

(Plus, I have a metaphorical goldfish brain, and I don't even remember how it all started 😅)

So.

What is there NOT to like about them??

I really love their overall dynamic. All three of them, but also the individual pairs.

It's not really stated, but in my head, they're all childhood friends. Kansuke and Yui are confirmed to be, and Kansuke and Taka'aki... kinda? They've canonically known each other since grade school and always competed with each other, established to be "rivals" since then. So it's reasonable to assume that all three of them spent at least some time together, right?.

(And they still do, look at them hanging out together after work.)

(They're on a date)

I love their bickering and teasing.

Yui calling Kansuke "Kan-chan", and when he objects, she goes: "Yeah, yeah, inspector Yamato 😉", clearly not taking him seriously (and he knows it. Just look at him "=_=").

Then you have Taka'aki mocking Kansuke for being so obvious in his plan of helping him get back to headquarters. "I would have done the same for you, but I would've been way more subtle about it." - "Yeah you know what, you can stay here and rot for all I care! =_="

Both of them are teasing Kansuke in the woodpecker episode about the bad plan of Yamamoto, just for him to go "?? It's not MY plan, so why are you acting like it is??" (Look at their faces, man, Taka'aki looks so playful 😂)

And Kansuke is overall just... Kansuke. 😅 The first scene with him is yelling at Yui, and more or less the first scene with Taka'aki is him basically telling him to drop dead (and boy, does he look HURT by that??). AND YET??

Yet, it is very obvious that he cares for both of them. They all do.

In their first case, Yui throws herself in the way of a bullet to protect Kansuke after he tried to protect her first (I think this is anime only).

Kansuke tells her that he's gonna wait for her to return to him the police.

Kansuke brought Conan to the Red Wall case not to help him, but so Taka'aki could solve it with his help and then return to HQ (which in the end was useless because Taka'aki actually cracked the message before anyone else lol).

We find out that Taka'aki went against all orders to find Kansuke, who had been declared dead, and got demoted because of that (he dashed to his support...).

Kansuke was ready to throw himself into a house completely ENGULFED in flames to save Taka'aki from death. And Yui DID throw herself into those flames! (still salty that they didn't show us how she rescued him)

You have Kansuke and Taka'aki communicating completely nonverbal on more than one occasion.

And then of course we have all the tragedies surrounding them.

The death of Kai Kuroto, Yui finding his dead body. Kansuke going missing on the search for his murder, declared dead, then found again in a coma, with his eye lost and leg damaged in undisclosed way (they hint that it's reversible in the Woodpecker case (Manga only), but who knows). Taka'aki getting demoted after throwing himself into the search for Kansuke, Yui on the other hand getting married to a suspect to further investigate Kai's murder.

And do I even have to mention the whole Family-murder past for Taka'aki?? Imagine coming home at 13 (?14?) from summer camp and finding your parents brutally murdered and your little brother traumatised (and we know he's only still alive because the murderer thought he'd lead him to his (dead) daughter one day! So it could've ended even worse!), then being separated from your brother by long distance (I checked, it's about a 3h ride by train from Nagano city to Tokyo.), AND THEN YOUR LITTLE BROTHER IS ALSO KILLED WHILE UNDERCOVER?? Give that man a fucking break!!

Also love how all of them had been a crime suspect at least once lol

And appart from all of that, I just love how the Trio just... accepts that Conan is ... different. There are no questions asked when he storms onto the crime scene, they'll let him watch the gruesome surveillance videos, no big deal, they overall just... treat him like an equal?

I mean?! In their second appearance, Kansuke and Yui go all the way to Tokyo just to get him on the case! Sure, officially they get Kogoro, but Yui outright tells Conan that Kansuke came to get him!

I also just love how they can keep up with him. Sure, you have Conan making hints for the other cops, too, and them then figuring things out, but with the Nagano Trio, they often figure out things ALONGSIDE of Conan, getting the same ideas, etc (well, Taka'aki and Kansuke at least, Yui only did that once in her debut episode you can blame Aoyama for sidelining his female characters once again) and like I said, I think Taka'aki in the Red Wall case is one of the very, VERY few occasions of someone cracking a code BEFORE Conan. I love it?! They're so fucking smart!

So... yeah?? I think I'm done gushing. For now. Insert Marge Simpson Meme, I just think they're neat??

And imagining them as a throuple makes it all so much funnier.

[dio-the-thot-exterminator]

I feel so weird and like I'm doing something wrong?? My Boss manager always being so passive aggressive to me or maybe I'm just not used to ppl being so stupid.

She's like "you NEED to be selling the credit cards more. You know we base your scheduling on how many credit card u sell and if you don't have high numbers then when I start hiring new people..."

HIRING WHO?????? HIRING WHOO???? Id like to see all the people you��re hiring hmm? Where? You can barely keep ur own managers from constantly calling out of work. So ur forced to do 60 hr work weeks every month. I know u ain't talking to me And the other two associates always call out or don't show up so I have to come and cover for them…I KNOW YOU AIN'T TALKING TO ME!??!??!?!?

"Your job is to sell the stuff at the counter and credit cards" ok then why am I sweeping the floors and cleaning the bathrooms and wiping the mirrors and pricing merch and tagging and taking out the trash and dusting and packaging online orders etc?

She like "even tho ur just an associate u NEED to be reading the emails everyday" girl how is knowing what the stores over n Texas and Florida make gon help me 💀 She acts like she got hella people on stand by bitch u dont she tryna lecture telling me I need to do more... All you do is talk on the phone and ask ppl to join ur church.

She be in the corner somewhere on the phone and the customers are like "um...excuse me?" And she ignored them so I gotta help them. Even tho she tasked me with scanning all the fucking items in the store!!

And she literally told me "u need to pay attention more to the customers YOU'RE NOT HERE TO COMPLETE TASKS!!!" AHHHHHHUAHHHHHHHHHHHHH what do you mean???????? Wtf am i here for then??

I'm bout to snap on her fr maybe I'm too combative… she got me pushing around this chart.

She was like complaining "uh make sure you fix that bcuz y'all like to leave it a mess 😒" And I was bout to say "bitch who tf is y'all??????" I KNOW how you are and I know you complain about every lil thing, so whenever i'm pushing that chart around it be looking neat and tidy and I put it back like that too. 

I'm da best employee she has!!! My other managers Jays and Red were literally like “ugh we were so lucky to have found you” and the other day a customer had came back into the store to tell my manager Red what a good job i did helping her find what she needs and being accommodating…The other associates dont do shit.

The college girl who barely works saw a box all messed up, she tried to quickly close the top (didn't work) and then she just walked away. I was like "um aren't u gon fix that?" And she was like "oh yeah right" Like??? And all she does is stand behind da counter. The store be a mess and she be standing.

The phone guy just be on his phone and he be chilling in da back. I know u are not on my case. when u let a whole ass employee stay in the break room his entire shift 💀.

I feel like she get someone sort of power trip off it and she just needs someone to terrorize and she choose me because I'm always there 🥲 (this is the reward i get for being a real ass employee??) 

Boss manager was like "I'm going to start quizzing you guys on what was in the manual  bcuz y'all act like talk forgot, you NEED to be following them!!" Girl still on shit from da "training" videos. Shit she don't even follow…

Yesterday she was like, “go reprice the entire clearance section, make sure you don't leave the chart out!!! Every Time someone walks in the store, put the chart back and greet them!!! (she's standing next to the entrance doing nothing) Well this NEEDS to be done before your shift ends so get it together hurry up!!! And you can actually leave the chart out when u need to ring someone up on the register (she is one the phone and didn't notice someone standing there) OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING THAT GUY NEEDS HELP!!! HELP HIM!!! GOOOO!!! AND TAKE THE CHART WITH YOU!!!!! OMG OMG STOP STOP LEAVE THE CHART HELP THAT GUY NOWW UGHHHHHHH!!!!!" and she is...standing there doing nothing...he walked up to her first bcuz she was closer…

Its so awkward asking someone to apply for the credit card, bcuz the boss manager expects you to harass every customer (she literally follows them around the store and asking them repeatedly to sign up i counted once…she asked one person 7 times) AND it's not even only the credit card, it's everything in the damn store. AND she only wanted 1 person on the register even when its rlly busy, trying to sell everything in the store…. (you guys only 2 people are allowed in the ENTIRE STORE one associate and one manager bcuz the company wants to be cheap)

It's like the customer places whatever they’re buying down and I have to say “hey this thing is buy one get on half if you're interested, and we have this item on sale, also if you wanted any of these items they’re behind you. Do you want any of this? I can show you the different ones we sell. And we have this too. I can help you pick out the one you need. We also have a credit card, if you want, you'll earn coupons and get a discount off today's purchase :D"

And she wants us, to say that, TO EVERY SINGLE CUSTOMER!! Everyone…

So it gets so awkward asking, especially if they are just buying like one little item. And to make things worse she's so nitpicky about everything like I was asking if they wanted to join our rewards and she was like "ugh if you ask it like that of course they're gonna say no!!!" And then she...didn't give me a way I should ask them…

I just nod and say "okay" whenever she starts ranting. She just get on my nerves a lot but that's also bcuz ima hater. Idk i feel like i do everything correctly and efficiently so idk why my managers are always attacking or complaining about me. 

Can I pleaseeeee have a job where I only need to complete tasks??? Where are those jobs?? Someone point me in the right direction

[3416]

do you know if there's a timeline (ideally with sources) available anywhere detailing mitch's last contract negotiations? i didn't follow the leafs until a couple years after and seeing how quickly some pretty minor things ("looked upon as gods," all the times he's been torched for out of context/partial quotes, this whole security nonsense, etcetcetc) have been exaggerated into unforgiveable controversies in realtime makes me very curious how much of the relentless anger over his contract is rooted in actual reality vs people just clinging to the most uncharitable perspective possible to justify their weird obsessive hatred for him for like idk not taking a hometown discount and having a shitty dad lmao. like right after willy signed this year a leafs podcast (!!) guy tweeted about mitch wanting more than him and i still see replyguys using that as absolute Proof of his camp leaking to ~the media~ when it makes zero sense for that dude to be a legitimate source?? how much of what they repeat as the cold hard facts is an accurate assessment of what happened vs falling for "insiders" speculating on a hot topic to farm engagement from a super reactionary fanbase, ykwim?

i don't know of anything like that (although you may be tempting me to make one), but even trying to sort through some of the bullshit of that time, it's impossible to tell what's real and like you said, what people's Interpretations of things have just become canon in a whole bunch of other fans minds who are primed and ready to hate him anyway. just looking at their numbers, i'm sure mitch will want more than willy and i'm sure that's a reasonable demand considering the leafs know the stats too, lol.

i think darren dreger played a big part in leaking certain information, like the offer sheets w cbj and potentially mitch playing in switzerland. he also did a lot of 'well the leafs are going to need to over x amount', but if i'm so honest.... i've definitely seen that used even being a more recent fan for other players so LOL. regardless of what's true or not, those are all just tactics and mitch marner ended up signing a deal that the team offered him. to act like players and their agents have never in the history of the world threatened to leave is ridiculous bc that's exactly what negotiating IS and the dumbest ppl among us cannot comprehend that. mitch's negotations just were apparently very chaotic and public and his team wanted auston to be the comparable, so everyone always tries to say he DEMANDED matthews money but like...... did he get it. is he still here. does he still want to be here despite not making as much. like it's all just such stupid arguments. i mostly haven't done a lot of research about this because i don't want to have to wade through just hours and hours and layers and layers of bullshit on forums like reddit or twitter or targeted articles that journalists put out in anger. we're gonna have to experience it again this year, but i hope mitch's agent can just keep things under wraps.

[destinyc1020]

Confession for Sunday:

Not to be negative, but I can't stand some solo Tom fans on this website and on Twitter being so negative. Twitter, I've not gonna comment on because it's so deranged, so I've left it, but solo Tom blogs on here are so damn negative. I can understand their frustration being a fan of someone whose career it seems to always be tested by the critics and online public perception, but acting like his is in a bigger disadvantage than most actors, especially dei when his biggest roles are in Marvel, Uncharted and Cherry is crazy I'm sorry. My irritation is becaue I can tell one blog is run by a black woman its giving CC vibes no shade, and it's embarassing and sad to get angry or annoyed if he posts his Z on his ig account as opposed to his work. His play is in a few days, trust me he's more than fine!!!!

Like, he's been doing this for years,sorry. He was posting her even when they were just "mates," lol. Or get angry when fans of both post about him getting jacked and calling it "icky." When has it been icky to thirst over beefy Tom??? Do you understand this behaviour isn't exclusively to Tom. All yt celebs men get thirst after on even if they are very slim or super thick I'm sorry. Gatekeeping a public figure is crazy I'm sorry.

Like I understand being a Tom stan ain't for the weaK. Like, we've been through it, lol. The future castings he passed on, the wish for more career opportunities, stans of yt male celebs picking on him, especially ones who have been Z's costars, reading puff pieces against him in service of other actors have been rough, but I recently read that Tom doesn't care about articles about him much on Doms patreon, so I stopped caring tbh. English celebs generally go by the never complain, never explain motto when it comes to the media. Harry Styles uses it, too. I only care about what he tells us, not the other way round.

Like you guys want him to be something that he's not, and it's so tiring going round in circles. It's a silly comparison, but Tom Cruise is a questionable person who I feel is private despite knowing a lot him. Most ppl who work 9 to 5 don't care to read blogs or information about him. They see him in a good movie, they watch and have fun and go home. That's it. Tom isn't Cruise, thank god, but he mentions Christian Bale and Cillian Murphy as actors whose careers he wants to have, which is to do the work and retreat to his personal life. A lot of young actors want to do that now cause as a society, we know too much of each other.

Him not posting R+J was a bummer, but strategically, it's very smart because in this digital age, ppl want everything immediately.

Mystery builds hype. 101 marketing.

Anyways, that's my two cents.

Whew, okay…. Obviously something is going on in the fandom rn which I am not privy to, because I’m currently at work lol, because you’re like the second Anon that I’ve had in my inbox complaining about this today.

Is this all because Tom posted Z on his Instagram?? Geez people (antis) smh lol…. Get a grip! 🙄 Deal with it! Tom has a right to post his gf to his Instagram if that’s what he wants to do.

First of all, Twitter can be such a cesspool. ☹ I highly recommend not even paying much attention to what’s being said on Twitter, or, at the very least, not taking it SERIOUSLY.

Second…. I will have to agree with you somewhat on the topic of how some fans in Tom’s fandom behave. I almost feel like fans in Tom’s fandom don’t just allow him to just be? It really is sad imo. I actually have a bit of a theory as to why this is the case. This is just my personal theory, so of course, take this with a huge grain of salt… But I kind of feel like the reason why Tom is held at such a high standard (in his OWN fandom) is because most of his fans only became his fans due to Spiderman/Marvel/MCU hype. My guess is that not a lot of current Tom stans today knew or paid much attention to him PRIOR to Spiderman. So, a lot of Hollanders (Tom stans) probably were used to Tom “winning” right from the beginning right out of the gate.

Whereas, some of the stans of other popular wm fandoms (i.e. JE, Timothee Chalamet, Zac Efron, Dylan O’Brien, Ryan Gosling, Austin Butler, Bill Skarsgard, even Mike Faist, etc.) were probably fans of these guys back when they were not as well known, or when their careers weren’t as “hot” as they are currently. So, their fans are used to them being in a “struggle” position and have been patient, understanding, and open to a wider variety of “wins” and even “fails” for their male faves. They love them regardless….no matter what is going on.

But with Tom, because he gained most of his fans probably more so due to Spiderman/Marvel/MCU, I feel like his fans are/were used to him being the hot new “It Guy” right off the bat, and his stardom went CRAZY overnight, so they haven’t been there in the trenches when Tom was just an “unknown” actor. They didn’t love him before he was super hot and everywhere like he is today. So I think they don’t allow him the grace and understanding that a lot of other fandoms usually give their own faves.

Don’t get me wrong, some other fandoms do clown their faves too ROTFL! 🤣(Make no mistake about that lol) But I think Tom is held to such a higher standard because he started off as the “It Guy” , and so now, when his fans see other actors getting some addicted, or maybe “taking his spot” (maybe in their minds?) they get upset/angry/jealous/negative etc.

Idk, that’s my theory?🤷🏾‍♀️

For me, I’m the type of fan that’s just like how you described most people are with actors such as say Tom Cruise. While I always wish the best for my actor faves, at the end of the day, I know it’s not MY life, and I just want them to be happy. I go see a Tom Cruise movie, and I’m good! 😃 I’m not worrying about his career in the meantime, or worried if he hasn’t made a film in 3 years or whatever lol. I just take things as they come!

I think part of the reason why Tom’s fandom is so hard on him is because they have these crazy expectations on him because they see it as some type of “competition”, instead of just letting Tom BE.

I think that if you’re a TRUE fan of someone, you love them when they’re “down” and when they’re up. Don’t be a “fair-weather” fan in other words. It’s okay for an actor to have a “Down” period. This industry is very transient and challenging. It’s okay for an actor to “take a break”. It’s okay for an actor to have some hits and even some misses in their career! That’s NORMAL! Fans are way too hard on Tom imo.

I already gave my theory as to why that might be the case, but if you all have any other ideas/theories, by all means, let me know!

Re: Your Last Part about R&J…

Tom has posted about R&J a couple of times, no?? I’m sure he will post even MORE as the play gets underway. I even expect him to MAYBE do a video collage at some point showing the process. That would be super cool. 😊

[ca-suffit]

Genuinely not trying to call you out or start stuff with you, but why do you assume if a black person disagrees with how you go about bullying people that it is baiting? What if some black fans genuinely find your method problematic? I think that is part of the problem I see in the fandom is everyone wants to categorize fans into white vs black, where all black people assume all white people are racists and all white people assume black people are whining and unjustified. There are shades of grey in this fandom.

I'll be honest, I think a lot of the people you have called out was justified but I also think some of it was unwarranted. I don't think it was right how the lioncourts was treated and I'm sure you will tell me "fuck off" because that seems to be the way this account is often handled, which is why I feel like I have to be on anon. Some of these "callouts" are bad takes or naive but does not always mean that person is racist. Have you ever tried talking to someone privately on why something said could be or is problematic before blasting them? Are you open to self-reflection when someone tells you they think something is problematic that you are doing? I think we would get a lot further with each other in this fandom if it was handled that way. Yes. There are some gross, blatantly racist people in this fandom but some of these callouts that prompt and promote harassment just doesn't feel right.

u don't know anything about me or things I've seen here, u think this shit just happened over night. go away, ur clueless to how shit works here.

to be fr for a second tho before I go off more, I do listen to ppl. but most ppl who talk like u are in favor of preserving white fandom values and that's why I don't listen to this, especially when ur framing things incorrectly to begin with about how I think and what I do. u also ignore how much support is here cuz it's easier to make it seem like I'm acting alone and rebelliously. I'm not lol.

also all of u fucking stop with this victim bullshit. if ur not saying "I'm coming with a username cuz I'm not scared" then it's "I'm on anon because I AM scared." just shut up?? can u talk like normal ppl?? what do u think I'm doing here. nobody is doing shit. I'm doing less than the loud fandom has been doing this whole time otherwise and I'm doing shit from the tags only and ur all acting like I'm worse. ur full of it and this is why this is so annoying. u don't know what ur talking about and ur trying to shame the wrong bitch.

u also go hard af for the most random, useless ppl. a lot of this is just a way to manipulate things to make me look like a bully and ur an asshole for it btw. byeeeee. not feeling sorry for poor wittle lioncourts and her hurt wittle feelings about hanging out with white fandom abusers. I was being nice by not publishing all the asks I got about her and look what still happened anyway. look who is *still* being framed as a victim of something. what is this bitch a victim of?! what was she even bringing to the fucking table to begin with??

[golbrocklovely]

I’m not in the snc fandom by any means and I have no plan to do so but being just a causal fan of them, I have seen the way their fans act towards them, especially Colby. It always leaves a horrible taste in my mouth.

I sincerely wish these guys would start setting more boundaries with their fandom. There are sometimes where I see replies to their tweets or just looking up their users on twitter because I’m a nosy rosey sometimes and the things some of their fans say to them, especially Colby is just horrendous and down right yucky. It seems to be getting worse in my end too. The way some of their fans treat Colby likes he’s stupid, slow or like a child is just so gross. He’s a human being. It’s one thing to make a joke, but it’s another thing to treat him like he was born literally yesterday. It sometimes feels like infantalazation. Like this is a huge problem and I just wish that Colby would put his foot down about it. Hell, when everytime there’s a girl involved in his life everything goes haywire towards him. I just feel so bad for him at this point. if I had fans and they were pulling stuff like this, I wound definitely say something, and start muting/ blocking people if it started getting too much. Maybe Colby hates confrontation which I can totally understand. Maybe he hates drama as well. But if his fans keep getting away with basically being overbearing and weird, they’re never gonna treat him like a human.

I also have a hunch that he might be neurodivergent and has anxiety. I see a lot of myself through him. He does a lot of things I do. But I don’t wanna diagnose him because I personally don’t know him like that. I just hope he has a good head on his shoulders when it comes to this type of stuff. and I also just hope one day some of his fans grow up and stop treating him like he’s a dummy when he’s a very intelligent person. It drives me nuts when people do that to him. He clearly is very smart and very empathetic. A bright soul who deserves so much better. 🩷

this ended up being extremely long so... sorry about that haha

i getchu. i understand not wanting to join this fandom. tbh i only really enjoy the fandom on here and that's about it. insta there barely is a fandom, the tiktok fandom is too young and just makes shit up 90% of the time, and twitter…. is insufferable lol

and i completely agree with you about the treatment of colby. it's a weird mix of both treating him like a sex doll and treating him like a baby, which makes both behaviors all the more gross.

like i'll be honest, i don't love all the decisions he makes, and i have talked about that on here countless times. however, i don't actively tell him on social media how to live his life (aka i don't @ him on twitter when he does something that annoys me like a lot of other fans do). and at the end of the day i accept whatever he wants to do with his life. me complaining on here about some of the questionable ppl he has in his life isn't even half as bad as what i've seen on twitter, especially when it comes to some of the girls he occasionally is seen with.

over the years it's gotten worse, and i'm not sure for what reason. it feels like the fans started out on the right foot. they care about colby and don't want to see him get hurt. and i get that, i feel the same way. but at the same time, he's an adult. and in life you're gonna make some dumb decisions, and be friends with dumb ppl that you shouldn't have been. and that's your choice. and that's your mistake to make.

i think part of it is a lot of fans think they are owed a part of colby's life and having a say in it. maybe bc they've put time, effort, and money into being a fan, maybe it's bc they feel like they are friends with him and thus think they can say shit that a friend would say even tho they are a complete stranger to him. and while i can understand somewhat why someone would feel that way briefly, it doesn't change the fact it's not true. you aren't owed anything just bc you've been here a long time or bc you buy merch. so what. you aren't special in either one of those regards.

and when it comes to colby and his dating life… oh boy, that's where most of the drama lies. again, a lot of it comes from fans not wanting him to date a questionable girl. understandable. i get that protectiveness. however it has become very apparent that NO GIRL is good enough for him. fill in the blank on whatever reason, it doesn't matter. there is not a single girl that exists that everyone in the fandom can agree on. and that just shows that a lot of the concern comes from both jealousy and, if we're being completely honest, misogyny.

certain fans are jealous they will never get a chance to be with him, no matter how many y/n insert fanfics they read. and no girl is good enough bc nine times out of ten the reason is bc of something sexist like she's a slut or a gold digger or isn't pretty enough or is too pretty or isn't as good as other girls.

my favorite phrase, highkey, is when a girl is seen with colby, ppl start hating on her and then when asked why someone doesn't like her they respond with "idk she just gives me a bad vibe." lmao happens like clockwork.

all of this is to say that a lot of fans, while they love colby, don't respect him. they don't trust him to make his own decisions bc in their minds, he can't make the "right" ones. and thus needs to smothered into making the right one. and if he doesn't do that, then he deserves to be bitched at for eternity.

tbh i'm surprised colby tolerates half the fanbase at this point. if the fandom isn't yelling at him for breathing wrong, they're making fun of him. and while it's fine to be playful and banter with him, there's a difference between a one off comment and constantly picking at everything he does down to whether or not he has facial hair. like… why are we talking about his body hair? yall are weird for that one.

if i was colby, i wouldn't have fans anymore. bc i would blocking ppl left right and center. idc that you supported me for a long time, if you're mean to me, you're gone. and i ain't gonna listen to (usually) a child yell at me for fucking a random girl (or maybe not even fucking a random girl). that's why last year i wanted him to go chaos mode. i wanted him to fuck every and any girl that said yes strictly so fans would come to the realization that YOU DON'T CONTROL HIM.

get over it or gtfo. it's really that simple.

and as for whether or not he's neurodivergent, that's obviously something he would have to explore himself. i personally have always thought he might secretly have depression and definitely anxiety since he's talked about that part himself. there's a lot of things he has done in the past that make me think there might be something under the surface and reminds me a lot back when i was in denial of what was going on mentally. and there are times he gets into funks, and you can just see the light drain out of him for a bit. but in the end, that's for him to explore and seek help for if he so chooses and feels the need to. i would hope if he truly did ever feel bad he would ask for help.

he's a very strong person and has such a love for life. i just hope he lives it to the fullest. i truly just want to see him happy.

[ofgentleresolve]

im rewatching the devil's judge and JUST?? I HAVE SO MUCH ENTHUSIASM FOR REVAMPING GA-RAM NOW!!! aka i'm gonna make him connected to annie...it might end up being a romantic connection but i haven't decided on that yet :3 ( sorry finnick, but then again my intepretation of annie doesn't really stick to the original inspo anyways :/ ; also ara don't be too mean ) i'm also going to put a rough outline of how they met right here:

basically it's the mad girl with the former golden boy; he was a regular at the convenience store she works at- since he doesn't sleep well, he had a tendency to be wandering late at night and got hungry often; he was always very polite with her

i have this thought about how often there are young members of the stinking rich who like to come around the neighborhood just to be rowdy and mess around even if it's inconsiderate to the locals there

and like there's a particular set of men ( think of entitled former frat boys, boys with rich parents ), who start coming in during her shift and like to shoplift and harass her and make a general mess of the store...they always do it during her shift bc they know she's scared of them and wouldn't tell her aunt if they're harassing her. that and annie doesn't trust the police, especially knowing that they're members of the stinking rich

it also doesn't help that by now, her reputation as a 'mad girl' has spread to her aunt's neighborhood and those men start to harass her over it

ga ram catches these guys in the act a couple of times and always asked annie if she wants him to 'take care of them'- she never says yes, so ga ram usually stayed until they left so he can help with cleaning up

he doesn't directly intervene however until one of those guys does something that triggers annie's ptsd....and it's even worse bc that guy decides it's funny and keeps doing it while being egged on by his friends ( have to decide what the act is )- at that point, ga ram socks him in the face....and may or may not escalated into a fight....and a guy getting thrown out the window of the store :/

annie was not having a good time at all; later though ga ram comes back to help with fixing the window and paying for repairs- and annie insists on treating his wounds....eventually she starts to notice he comes in with a lot of wounds so he's also a regular patient of hers

one of the reasons they get along is bc they're both very quiet ppl. he doesn't mind that she tends to get lost in her own world and she knows despite his appearance, he's not violent or cruel in the slightest

he's one of the few people who can calm annie down when she's having a fit; it comes from empathy of near death experiences + surviving where they probably shouldn't have + being discarded by the system

[starsfreckled]

lil rant in coming . kinda prompted by the event . talking about gender & the fandom & ..basically a big ramble.

the story message is so darn cute. i love that amaya can tell young people that a form of love is self love & being true to oneself & your preferences. because amaya wasn't always out as NB. in 'my verse / my none tumblr wol verse / twt verse??' they came out during shb.

cause not all queer stories start with a teen figuring this out. some people are older. but people constantly shame older queer for coming out late... personally I wanted amaya's story to be one where, when they learn to forgive themself, to be themself, they also truly stand to themself. & for them, that journey takes up to shb. that journey takes them until they are 30. ( I am a not fully out yet NB person myself & I may never really come out irl because of how german works as a language & wanting to avoid troubles ).

& dunno. the fandom sometimes does not make it easy. like i know i started writing amaya as a woman but ya know. self discovery yadda yadda. I do write amaya as sb who has been living as NB since their younger years bcs I do not trust people to be able to realize why amaya may use she/her pre-shb & then they/them.

but the amount of times ppl go "well you know amaya is still kinda a she" why. cause they have a bigger chest? cause sometimes they wear a dress? cause they do not fit a stereotype of how all NB people must be androgynous? I am sorry they do not fit into this media & fandom pushed idea of how NB people must be. People really want NB people to be like a third gender when this is exactly what we are not. Legit some people still misgender amaya in asks or while talking to me. same with aze.m/asthelios.

& also ofc the eternal dispute of "amaya appears straight" cause some of their ship are with men. sorry to say, but part of it is.... if we talk about xiv canon women, as much as i love them - they all tend to fall under a same-ish archertype. we have way more diverse masc presenting characters where it is clear the devs put more love & care into them.

moen & ysayl.e were killed off for no good reason. shtola never got the same kinda development the male scions got ( nah imma say it, if shtola had been a guy the whole lifestream thing & aether sight would have had its own arc. alas it is 'haha funny we nearly saw her naked'). the moment the devs remembered minf.ilia is a really interesting character they got so scared they yeeted her off for over an expac only to have her be dead once we reunite. yotsu.yu died too. i really like zero but i am trying so hard to not be too attached bcs the game slapped she/her on 'em so all i see is a deathflag.

i am sorry then that people feel more inclined to ship their characters with the guys then. the saving grace in all of this are the rper here tbh who grab these characters & give them so much more life ( just as an example, @astherea 's shtola is just brilliant )

just no. amaya is not a straight cis woman. amaya is a deeply queer character & just 'cause they do not follow certain expectations does not mean people got the right to insist they are not queer. & I think part of it is the fandoms general stance towards femme writers & femme ocs. people see a chest & go "oh woman. probs only want to ship" when that just ain't the case... &...like. even if. why do people act like they are personally attacked by that???

i don't have a real conclusion tbh i dunno why the event made me think of all that but it just kinda got me to ramble about this even tho this is 80% incoherent screeching at nothing.