#ppl can keep sending asks either way

[gregmarriage]

wondering if i should go to bed or try to fix my sleep by staying up?

[bangcakes]

.

[itsalwaysdark]

i am okay tho i just have momeys sometimrs . please do not ever worry abt me guys

[wingedshadowfan]

some thoughts about the caitvi breakup scene

i saw ppl pointing out what looks like a tear running down caitlyn's nose after her and vi's fight w/ sevika and jinx (when she finally stops hitting the wall w/ her rifle and puts her forehead to it) and it could've been just sweat, but here's why i think it wasn't:

it's bcuz vi took the choice away from her.

we all know caitlyn's parents had been keeping her in a gilded cage since she was a child. we see this symbolically in her conversation with jayce when he gets kicked out of the academy after the explosion - he's outside in the rain, but she's within the gates of the kiramman estate, under an umbrella, protected, hidden. she tells him her parents don't allow her to talk to him anymore but she doesn't care. they're friends.

we know cassandra didn't approve of caitlyn's choice to become an enforcer either (we assume caitlyn had to fight for it and her family tried to stop her). even after that "win", her mother kept meddling and made sure caitlyn would always get safer tasks - out of harm's way and where she'd never be able to prove herself or do any actual good like she'd always wanted. her own coworkers make fun of her for being a kiramman and only "playing dress up" as an enforcer - a job she decided she wanted and had been working towards since she was a child, in order to help and protect people. she'd had to fight (not for the first time) to be placed on a case, in a real guard position, to be taken seriously.

caitlyn's choice and her agency - things she's barely been given in her own life, because of her parents, her name and how sheltered she'd grown up - she'd always had to fight for. she's had to fight to be able to choose, she's had to fight to defend her choices, and she's had to fight to prove herself over and over again.

then for the first time in her life, she didn't have to fight because vi (perhaps being swallowed by her own guilt for everything jinx had done to caitlyn) gave caitlyn the ability to choose what happens to jinx. unconditionally.

and caitlyn chose. vi agreed with her choice.

take the shot.

then vi took the choice away from her in the last possible moment, physically stopping her from shooting. (now, we can talk abt what that means to someone who's never been the stronger opponent in any physical altercation they've been a part of so far, but i won't)

this is the last thing cait needed to send her fully spiraling in the face of the adrenaline after almost dying again (sevika wasn't playing), the stakes of their mission and her trauma from jinx being unlocked. caitlyn completely disassociates shuts down, goes all out hitting the wall, possibly cries, refuses to look vi in the eyes and tells her, "i thought you were different but you're not"

she's yet another person who denies caitlyn the ability to make a choice in her life.

it's her blood in your veins.

to caitlyn in this moment, vi's loyalties lie with the blood of someone who'd worked for silco in oppressing the undercity, lured and blown up caitlyn's coworkers, tried to kill caitlyn (and vi) multiple times, kidnapped her from her fucking bathroom, dressed her up against her will, kept her hostage for a full day in which she with almost 100% certainty tortured her, kept her as the only person gagged throughout the tea party, asked vi to kill her, then blew her mother up along with 4 more counselors and (allegedly) attacked their memorial. talk abt taking someone's freedom of choice away.

then why are you the one acting like her?

vi - not fully without reason - compares caitlyn to her worst fucking nightmare. a psychotic killer who's caused so much fear and trauma to caitlyn that she admitted jinx's smile is all she sees when she closes her eyes, up there w/ her own mother's lifeless eyes?? and yeah, vi has a point - caitlyn had indeed grown more violent and aggressive in her desparate pursuit for revenge. that doesn't mean it hurts caitlyn any less, especially when she'd been trying so hard to do the right thing (sending a squad to catch jinx instead of a full blown armed invasion, only her and vi having hextech, clearing the streets first), and vi knows this: she just automatically did what she does best - aimed for where it hurts the most. i think she even realizes she's overstepped but before she can do anything about it, caitlyn bites back reflexively and hits her with her rifle. there, in the place of the wound she once took care of herself.

the perfect storm.

the only question i have left is why everyone in this fandom keeps acting like caitlyn is the only one who hurt someone and vi is the only one who got hurt in that scene.

[moonchild033]

Hiii sis how are u i was reading post 5th house the jupiter in 5th house tend to be relegious are there placments to show non relegious person

Hii my lil sis, I'm fine, how u doing?! 💖

Oh yes I know a few but the expression of the non- belief and it's extent can be different, I can explain some placements a little but it goes beyond that, based on other aspects too.🫡

Placements that can indicate a non-religious personality:

Rahu in 9H- They can question religious practices or develop a liking towards other religious philosophies than the one they were born into. 🧡🧡

Debilitated 9H lord or 9H lord in conjunction with a debilitated planet - 9H shows our belief systems and how deep we are into it, this placement can cause an aversion or at least a blunt boredom towards religious practices, they simply may not be interested. 💚💚

9H lord in Rahu's nakshatra - They might be inquisitive but they are mostly not atheists, they just want to know the stories and think for themselves whether they could relate to it or not.🩷🩷

Saturn aspecting 9H or in conjunction with 9H lord- They believe in God and might pray but rarely do they exhibit themselves as highly religious. They could think of God as a power in this universe, they trust in God in a different philosophical way which is a deeper connection that others might not understand but they're not conventionally religious as in following the practices. This is somewhat hard for me to explain, they focus on the spiritual and philosophical part of it but not the religious part.♥️♥️

9H lord in Saturn's nakshatra - They are either too religious or a straight out atheist, there's nothing in between, it might be that they got very much hurt in life that they chose to believe in themselves but they could become religious later in life.🧡🧡

Rahu in 5H- This is not a most common placement in this topic but some ppl having this might not be as religious as their surroundings, they could be less focusing or disinterested in religious matters while their surroundings can be more into it.

Debilitated jupiter- They might not like the teachings of their religion, since they couldn't relate to it, they could've just avoided that aspect altogether.🩷🩷

Jupiter Rahu conjunction - This is Guru Chandal Yoga. Even though this placement can give spiritual understanding and good exploring tendency, they usually oppose and argue the traditional religious practices, they wouldn't like some of the conventional sayings and they would try to prove their point why they think it's wrong or pointless, and can be rebellious in talking against religious practices.♥️♥️

9H lord in 6/8/12H- They can be more about the spiritual part or won't believe much in anything religious depending on the strength of 6/8/12H lords, if they're strong, then they might be good and interested in the spiritual areas rather than common practices but if those lords are weak along with 9H lord in these houses, they probably might be atheist.🧡🧡

Debilitated Sun or Atmkaraka- As sun is the natural significator of the soul and AK being your own soul significator, weakness of these can lead to not trusting in anything that is not solid, like they find it hard to link an unseen concept with themselves.These can apply to 8/12H suns to an extent.🩷🩷

If someone has many of these placements, they might be non-religious but keep in mind that other aspects play a role in deciding it too ✨

These are the placements I could think of as of now, tqsm for asking this Q's lil sis, I loved answering it.🤗🫶🩵

Guys, pls send thought provoking 'asks' lyk this, I understand the curiosity and the need for feeling clarity by asking personal placement Q's but sometimes I'm overwhelmed by it, I want to post answered asks that can benefit everyone, lyk everyone has something to learn from it.🥺🥺♥️

Let's Learn and Grow Together! 🫂💋

With Love-Yashi ❤️‍🔥

Masterlist 💖

[deerboybreeder]

UPDATED PINNED LETS GOOOO!

[PraiseMe Link!] [Tellonym Link!] (Send me threats and scary things!)

Hi, I'm Deer but you can call me whatever you want idc! Im a trans man and use he/it pronouns (or any pronouns in kink), I'm in my late 20's, and my blog is primarily focused on breeding and pregnancy! However lots of my other kinks will be present here, such as cnc, kidnapping, intox, monsterfucking, hucow and gender play- this includes both force detrans and forcemasc!

Inbox and DMs are open, but keep in mind:

-i am fat! That's just a fact, don't go into this assuming I'm skinny

-I've been on testosterone for several months, and I am starting to be read as a man in my day to day life!

-I AM TAKEN and won't get in a relationship with you. I do have permission for roleplay, so assume unless stated otherwise that I'm playing a role here. I DO NOT SEND PICS BECAUSE OF THIS!!! they own my body ❤️

You Can: talk to me about impregnation, forced impregnation, breeding, pregnancy in general, reduce me to my womb and tits (PLEASE), send fantasies about breeding boys girls and anyone else, hunting deerboys (for breeding or otherwise), monsterfucking, anything hucow related, light blackmail, and forced marriage! I talk about it less here, but I'm also into having parts of me hacked off for meat- feel free to bring that up if you want but I don't expect much bc it's niche. I'm also a traumagenic system of many, so feel free to ask about that/take advantage of it!

Misgendering is good (but I really prefer degendering + dehumanization), forced feminization and forced detransition especially from pregnancy, forcemasc and trans superiority (ESP transfem superiority ❤️). See below the cut for specific boundaries about that!

I also genuinely love being sent: rape threats, stalking threats, degrading messages, porn, insults, messages that imply I'm not a real man (though don't extend this to all trans ppl that's a turn off), messages that call me stupid, and graphic violent threats. If it's not on my limits list, it's probably ok to send!

You can't: ASK FOR PICS, or talk to me about scat/piss, fauxcest/incest, raceplay, beast (not monsterfucker but like real animals). Don't imply I'd cheat on my partners either. Outside of kink warning that if I ever feel like someone actually has my personal information/location, I will delete the blog immediately. So if you want to keep playing with me, don't.

DMS ONLY: Due to privacy and the way Tumblr nukes blogs, I'll only engage with the following in DMs- hunger play, asking about my trauma, and Im CONSIDERING allowing blackmail play if we have a rapport built. I also will do ageplay in DMs but I identify as a younger teen in that space and not a little-little, and won't use family-related terms.

Required reading over! Read all of the above or I'll stomp you to death with my hooves!

Genuinely for blackmail play I gotta trust you. Assume everything here I mention irl is roleplay unless stated otherwise! I am genuinely pumping to induce lactation though, that's real, and so is me dressing more feminine on and off- that's not for detrans reasons but because I'm GNC. The god pregnancy is ALSO real, but some aspects are embellished to make it fit on the kink blog. Feel free to ask about that!

Detrans specific boundaries!

The biggest thing is don't imply all other trans people are not actually their gender. I'm okay with classing "fakeboys" as a group and being considered part of that group, but that's exclusively people who also have a detrans kink. I'm also more likely to engage with this kink with other trans people, and in a much harder context than I would with a cis person.

I'm okay with being called almost any term except for woman- even in the context of kink, I can't stand being called a woman. A womb, a girl, wife, even using she/her on me is fine, just not woman. In my kink narrative, women have a level of personhood that I can't ever have! I also am fine with a specific kind of "misogyny lite" play that's exclusive for fakeboys- fakeboys and ftm girls are subject to the typical "you exist to make babies and be in the kitchen and serve", whereas real trans men, cis men, nonbinary people, and women (both cis and trans) are granted full autonomy and agency.

I'm okay with being told I'm "lying" about being a boy/man, and being made to "go back" to being a girl/cunt/womb/whore/whatever, but what's BEST is breaking me. Sure, I was always a boy, if a fake one, but you decide to break me into a good girl for you and ruin me instead. That's better than anything else! It's also totally okay to do "light" misgendering/force fem to me- encouraging me to dress more femininely due to me being GNC and things like that, only to tell me later it's because you want me feminized.

[fuwaprince]

👉👈 Hi friends! I have a long, serious post made just for you(!) that isn't full of spoilers, smut or mooning lawn gnomes. Please read if you can, this is a 💥 mutual aid request 💥

It has been a horribly painful and long while as most people following/keeping up with me know. and in a few days I'm going to be down $1500, which is basically all my fucking $

I can't afford Christmas for anybody, which sucks and I'm very sorry. I can't even take care of myself and haven't been, which also sucks and I'm very sorry

Landlords spontaneously raised rent on me more than halfway through this month as punishment for not getting to my house chores and not communicating, to be totally honest with you. I feel ashamed and awful about it but I didn't want to clean the place while multiple ppl living here had tested positive for COVID and kept walking around unmasked... I am not fully vaxxed because I've been too depressed to get any kind of necessary medical care done and I didn't want to catch COVID in the middle of my finals week for the semester. I woke up to being angrily and rudely bitched at first thing after the last of my finals (I passed at least). It wasn't a humanizing text. Fuck the mistreatment though. Rent is now almost doubled and it won't be lowered

There was no room for negotiation and I truly believe they've resorted to pricing me out of living here because the group of renters psychologically tormenting me wasn't effective (actually- putting a picture of my rapist on the fridge rly was super effective in getting me to isolate myself in my room all day and so was outing me as trans to the transphobic ass neighbors.... But I didn't and still don't have any place better to move out to, like the way they were hoping I would. Yes, I have looked and BEGGED btw)

I want out of here NOW, but I can't leave. I tried and had to come back because it was the best option. I can't afford to stay in a motel/hotel/BnB just to get away from them for a day or two during Christmas. I don't have any friends who I can spend the holiday with either. During the semester, I resorted to convincing classmates with keys to locked buildings to let me crash in them while they worked at night and I would leave before anybody showed up. Now that school is out, I can't do that. I don't have any family I can reach out to for support or friends who I can depend on for immediate help. I have been crying day in and day out for weeks. I have records of it posted throughout my blog. Literally crying for days on end. I'm being so fucking transparent

All that lump of text is to explain to whoever is out there, who might be listening and willing and able, to please consider helping me, if and ONLY IF able. I know times are tough and if you'd rather use your $ for other reasons or just don't have any to spare, don't sweat it and take care! 🫂

I've thought about what I could do for a long time and have helped myself how I can. It isn't enough. I've applied for so much assistance. Been approved and been sabotaged by my inhumane mom (who does not love me) via stealing my legal documents and letters and hiding them for months. My mind jumps to grim places but I'm clinging for dear life to whatever hope I have left that says things will get better. I wish I knew somebody with a business that I could work for. Part of me feels so fucking terrible for asking for help because I feel like a waste of all your resources. I feel like I shouldn't ask, like I really do not fucking deserve help, but there are friends online who care, who I know mentioned being interested in helping in whatever ways they can

So to the people who care to seriously me, I'm ready to accept it: please send me nice words to get through this and feel less alone. It feels pathetic to ask but I would love a nice letter. A nice card even. Kind words of any kind would go a long way. It means more to me than food. I have felt so broken and every day feels like a test to figure out how badly I actually want to live

I'm also leaving my cash app and paypal here in case anybody would like to do more than what I'm comfortable asking but probably very likely will inevitably need very very soon. I will be left with fucking nothing and I will have no idea what to do once rent is paid

Thank you to those of you who have sent love, offered to listen and heard me out. I really wish it wasn't so hard to survive. I'm trying to feel better knowing there are people out there who are also without help and hoping the best, but it doesn't make me feel any better or comforted tbh. I just wish the help was there for us. I wish there was a place to go for spare love, care, compassion, empathy, kindness, humanity, generosity... I need that more than I need $. Call me stupid but that's what I live for. I don't live for paying to survive in terrible conditions. I live for love and to smile with friends

I hope to write back to the friends who have already been so kind as to message me soon btw. I'm sorry for not replying sooner. Your overwhelming support is sincerely sweet and sometimes I cry because I can't believe people are so nice (to me???). It'll give me something to do that doesn't make me feel like dying! :') so thank you thank you thank you *fist bump*

Hope you're all doing as well as you can and that somehow things get better. Hope anybody else struggling like me doesn't make the mistake of isolating like a sick and dying animal. You deserve love. You deserve support. Don't be like me. Have the courage to reach out to the people who care about you for help as early on into your emergency as possible. Don't let your situation snowball because you spend so long trying to figure out if you're worth it!!! This Random Tumblr user is here to tell you that YOU ARE. Sending my infinite everlasting unconditional love. Be nice to yourselves. Be nice to each other. Fuck the hateful assholes who wish I would just kill myself already. Tell your friends you love them. Happy Holidays!!!

And here's a single picture of a mooning lawn gnome at the very end, as a treat! I told you this post wasn't full of it.... It just ended with it 👉👉

[mr-president]

hello helloooo ^^ (on anon bc i get anxious talking to cool ppl)

so i have been. completely obsessed with your revived bedman au that you made. the one where he’s Chaos’ research assistant

so i wanted to send in an ask to see if you had anything else to share about it! like lore bits or headcanons or anything really!! :3 i’ve been so deeply autistic about this au i need more material to think about and mentally shake around in my head like a pinball machine

okay that’s all ^^ keep doin your thing you’re very talented and cool friend!!

howdy! thanks for your kind words!

and luckily, i have quite a bit to share:

A lot of this au is based on Chaos’ words that in another story, he could easily make himself the hero, rewrite GG reality, and rinse and repeat. Hence, Bedman’s role is to research how Chaos can feasibly insert himself into different realities or rewrite them in a way that wouldn’t completely eradicate time and space as we know it, likely in exchange for ensuring Delilah’s safety and health. As depicted, I’m certain Chaos’ taste for eccentric…”camp” that makes existence agonizing for everyone else is a clashing point between the very utilitarian Bedman and him.

Bedman’s absolute world would have any wish or any will come into fruition, like a lucid dream, essentially eliminating suffering and consequence and opening up infinite possibilities. Chaos’ ideal world is that of overcomplexity, unnecessary suffering, and tropes. It’s a fun dichotomy, especially since they’re both complete yappers just with entirely different ideologies.

Either way, in a sense, this is Bedman’s personal hell, and he himself views this experience as “punishment.” Not like he has a choice in just disobeying anyways.

But another thing i really wanted to explore in this AU is that of Bedman and Nagoroyuki, both who are unwillingly exploited by Chaos. Nago’s kind of a “frame of reference,” a “straight man” in all of this, as well as an unwilling actor.

They both have to see the other suffer, basically, and in a sense, they both want the other to get out and forget this whole experience. For Nago (who doesn’t have the frame of reference that Bedman did, in fact, commit terrible atrocities), this is some child Chaos exploits for his own gain. For Bedman, this is an unwilling bystander caught in the crossfire and chained and muzzled and ordered like a hound.

I can imagine their relationship paralleling that of Baiken and Delilah over time, and maybe that way, they can overcome Chaos. If there was to be a good ending, which I think there would be.

Also, Bedman’s able to retain more sanity than Asuka thanks to Nago being there and also being like “yeah that guy is Fucked Up, you shouldn’t have to deal with that.” But also Chaos just thinks Nago’s the coolest shit ever, which is why he creates storylines for both of them specifically.

I’d imagine if this was legit, Axl would be the one to fix everything, recalling when he waltz’d into Bedman’s dream world in Xrd. Or maybe Asuka would see himself in Bedman, and Bedman in him, helping prevent the inevitable spiral into madness from dealing with Chaos every waking moment

But that’s all I have for now—if you have your own ideas, I’d love to know :]

[monscrow]

intro post, i guess!!!

askbox open only on weekends; got too overwhelmed by spam, my apologies.

last updated 16/jan/2025

⚠️flash warning for blinkies at the bottom⚠️

free gaza, free palestine, stop genocide. you don't agree? block me.

i go by both mons and crow.

my pronouns are they/them, he/him and any neos/xenos that you think would fit either comedically or off of vibes.

lvl 16, so, a minor !! beware

aromantic, acespec, something like that; qprs are sick asf and all hail relationship anarchy.

art sideblog is @monscrowarts

audhdcd (asd + adhd + ocd 😻😋) and hEDS. i use tonetags, feel free to ask for clarification!!!

bday is oct 7. 🎉🎉🎉

i'm mexican 🇲🇽!! i speak both spanish and english.

timezone is cst/utc-6.

i say slurs i can reclaim (mainly the f and t queer ones) and swear a lot, though if that makes you uncomfortable please either block me or lmk so i can try to tone it down when around you.

i love interacting!! feel free to tag me in stuff, send some asks (be it on anon or not), or message me! moots can ask for my discord even if we've never actually talked before. though i suck at keeping consistent, nothing personal i promise</3 /gen

i tend to spam-reblog so do with that information what you will.

some tags you might see me use here and there:

#mons rambles ← just my thoughts, ideas, opinions, and whatever i feel like throwing into the tumblr void.

#ask a crow / #anon asks ← askbox replies.

#save / #art save / #fav / #hellsite faves ← these are more for myself, but yeah they're pretty self-descriptive. just in case you get curious or anything.

hyperfixations/interests/things i'm passionate about !!! i guess, kinda

→ mcr (+ most of the members' solo projects)

→ killjoys (california + national anthem, but mainly calif and fanon)

→ demolition lovers lore (i have literally written like at least three different essays about it for school help me i'm so serious)

→ emo/alt/diy culture

→ will wood

→ bandom in general

→ sonic the hedgehog (franchise) (SHADOW THE HEDGEHOG IS EVERYTHING BTW)

→ graphic design, arts and crafts, illustration (that's right y'all graphic design IS my passion 😔)

→ fnaf (bonnie fnaf they could never make me hate you)

→ cosplay/costume-making

→ d&d

→ crows (no way, crow, really???)

→ australian shepherds

→ the umbrella academy (s4 isn't canon in my heart + currently reading the comics !!! )

→ gravity falls

→ neurodivergencies/psychology/disabilities (this one's pretty meta ngl)

→ lgbtqia+ identities (emphasis on the aroace-spec ones + relationship anarchy)

→ politics/activism

→ linguistics + conlangs

→ fantasy in general (high fantasy, magic, vampires, tieflings, you name it)

→ boardgames

→ the count of monte cristo (book + 2024 movie)

→ webfishing :3

→ uhhhh there's more but i don't remember rn, i'll keep adding as i see fit (probably... maybe..... perhaps....... quizás........ puede ser..........)

dni

trump supporters, terfs, transphobes, anti lgbtqia+/queerphobics, exclusionists, ableists, racists, prolifers/antichoicers, proshippers/anti-antis, irl gore, pro-israel/zionists, pro-ai generated "content", pro-nft, non-critical media consumers, classists, ed blogs, sh blogs.

also, i'm aware that dnis tend to not be effective and i probably will still get shitty ppl in my inbox so i can and will block. though i'm p chill as long as you're chill. this blog is run by a very neurodivergent, mentally ill, mexican, transmasc, aroace faggot, and any kind of bigoted hatred will not be tolerated.

blinkies made with blinkies cafe !!!

pssst btw, before you go, if you read my intro post i'd heavily encourage you to like it, so i can know!!! :] (/nf though!)

[dimicul]

how i think the cod men would treat and show ppl they have a wife/gf (you 😜)

i’m just deranged and lonely

Price - old man price. just old fashioned, which i know is sooo repetitive but i believe he’s a mix of either being downright cheeky or extremely formal and gentlemanly. sends you flowers wrapped in ribbons, attaching notes to the beautiful bow (has his own flower girl in the town you live in.) his night out with you is either tucking into a good hearty meal with an action or romcom playing in front, the soft light spilling onto both of you, wine glasses on the table, or fancy dinners out. i can just IMAGINE him playfully smacking your ass as you pile the plates into the sink, chuckling with a cigar hanging from his lips. your family LOOOOVE him and he makes innuendos at the table that only YOU notice, his hand on your thigh.

As for introducing you to the task force, i think it’s clear to say he would show you off. whenever the chance is given. he’s not boastful, maybe just a bit cocky if the boys are complaining about being single or something, would just cross his arms behind his head and sink into his chair smirking, knowing damn well he has the loveliest girl he could ask for. takes you out for dinners, teaches you how to shoot a gun- it’s ENDLESS but i do think he can get overstimulated easily and get into a grumpy mood. ALSO he deffo has that dad side of him where he knows you like a certain food and will just keep buying it until you become sick of it. <3

Gaz - gaz is so overlooked it’s ridiculous. he is 100% the type of guy to only give princess treatment, period. pays for your nails. helps you take pictures for your social media. sends your cooking videos to the groupchat so his mates will send likes and comment under it. i feel like at first he’s tentative, a little cautious, because why would a cute thing like you be attracted to some rugged soldier? but when he does realise you like him for him, it’s date night everyday. sushi dates. going on picnics, spending the night at his family’s place. just a genuine golden retriever, does the whole lara jean thing where his large hand will tuck into your back pocket firmly. when he introduces you to the task force, Price is the one to notice he seems almost to eager to grab his phone when it rings, a slow smirk on his face. he’s almost a little too quiet, but not in a bad way - he looks content. glowing. i do think that gaz would upload his profile pic to be you and him and the lads would catch on. again he’s not showing off, because he knows a part of him is either too possessive or a little scared seeing as the job is dangerous. wouldn’t want to risk anything.

soap - geniunely struggled writing this one because i was confused as to whether he would be EXTREMELY loud and boastful about you, or sly and secretive. i think with soap it depends. he would make a comment on a mission with simon and the skull faced man would get the hint that there’s a special someone behind Soap that’s making his eyes twinkle a little more. wears bracelets you give him, will proudly crane his neck purposely during training so people can take a look at his hickies. but i do feel like he would keep your name a secret, one of those things where it’s private but not secret. as for dates, it’s either Scotland or something fun and engaging. hiking, bike rides, fun fairs, or sunbathing in Scotland in the countryside, laughing alongside his mum. he loves family and i ADORE that headcanon where it’s like he has 5 sisters. he’s jus that sassy yk? would propose to you within the year. he’s impulsive like that but it’s not a bad thing - when he likes something, he likes it, simple as. this is a random note but i picture him with a mercurial, big eyed and wiry girl that’s either loud and proud or demure and quiet. black cat and golden retriever vibes yk? same with Price actually, feel like they’d love to have partners they can tease

simon - girl put this man in therapy first. he would be, obviously, quite reserved and unaffectionate to begin with, but seeing as you’re his girl, his special person, his touches are more sincere. less fleeting. stares at you, cranes his neck lower so you can speak to him - he just understands you. understands and respects you, even if he doesn’t show it at first. his first date would not be extravagant at all, but he would put effort in. drives you in his car, fumbling with the cd player, explaining to you gruffly what his favourite one is. values your opinion, i think, definitely picks up on your favourite food, favourite type of music, what colour you look good in. sarcastic and dry, but sometimes finds himself speechless near you. slowly and slowly you peel him down to his core and you trust him, take care of him, and he does his best for you too. starts to bring you around to his apartment, acts annoyed when things like your makeup brushes and wipes and lashes are being scattered in his bathroom, but grows to love it. becomes almost worried when you don’t leave a piece of yourself wherever you are. he’s a gentle giant when in love, i hate this idea that he’s sex-fuelled and calloused and would man handle you, the poor guy has been through that shit himself, and he’s confident enough to know what a woman wants and needs. lets you dress him, maybe even teased the idea of matching outfits. COOKING FOR HIM would be the key to his heart, but even if you pass him a pot noodle, he would mumble a ‘cheers lovie’ and moves closer to you. security and trust, that’s all he needs.

i do think the team would have no idea you existed. read a fic here where it was like the task force find out simon has a whole wife and kids when helping him move and it’s so true honestly, but can you blame him? bro had his whole family exposed and hunted, no wonder he’s so so so protective over you. (i could rant about si for days.) i have this feeling that introducing him to your family almost panics him internally, so he distances himself for a couple of days. not to upset or offend you, just to collect himself, because maybe for once, he could have his family back. on your first year mark, he takes you Joseph’s grave and breaks down. i think that’s when you realise this man is in love with you and there’s no way you couldn’t love him back.

DEFINITELY spoils tf out of you, helps takes your heels off, kisses you affectionately, like he pours his soul into it. new nails, new clothes, new everything, how could he NOT spoil his love?

alejandro - i wanted to add him because recently i’ve just been obsessed. yeah you guys deffo met at a bar and had a one night stand, and you’re the cynical book reader with no filter and he grows to fckin love it. the whole team knows about you before you know about them 😭 gives you a lift home in the jeep, wearing the same dress from the night before, mascara smudged, on edge because some wide mf with a skull mask is glaring at you and this scotsman is making your hangover worse. GOD he’s whipped from the first night, has your number written on a napkin, messages you after a couple of days. when you slowly let your guard down, you realise his flair and his attitude is sexy as hell, and he then takes you out on a proper date, at a family based restaurant with good asf food. tells you about his life, his friends, his missions. definitely likes buying you lingerie, dimples popping out whenever he opens his phone and sees a pic of you clad in a dusty pink set. probably the more petty one 😭 he’s not really a date guy imo, you can quite literally have the best time of your life sat in the car with him, laughing and admiring the way his hand holds your thigh. prideful but not egotistical, makes sure your family likes him, definitely has a soft spot for your niece or younger sister. I NEED THJS MAN

[lumineary-arts]

Saw you ask about ppls AUs uh

Most of mine, admittingly, don't have designs yet. At least not drawn ones. Oops!!

But I can like?? Still ramble ig?

I also have a swap AU! I haven't posted a lot ab it, but it's called Solver Shift.

In it I put Sam in Cyns place. So the DDs have pink accents (wasn't comfortable using Doll and making them red, despite barely drawing DD armbands anyways - personally at least)

Some places I'm still unsure about, like idk whether Khan and Nori should be direct swaps with Ron & Tessa or should be put in Tessas parents position. If I go the latter idk who to put in Tessas place lol.

Ron and Tessa weren't actually ever romantically involved. They were just best friends, and were like "well we live together, we both kinda wanna know what having kids is like. So let's raise one together"; insert Nuke (N) being built. Tess survived a few years into his life, they built Cyn and then yada yada you know the story - dead mom

If it wasn't obvious by Ns name, the rail gun gets replaced by explosives. Thank Cyn for that, it was her idea. (They both take canonverse Uzi her engineering skills, but Cyn takes the more unhinged aspect of the personality.) - Nuke was like "we gotta do something about the DDs but idk what!" And Cyn, sparkly eyed and all, was like "Let's blow them up!"

I need to figure out some episode stand ins seeing as Cyn is younger but still sticks to N like glue. Beau takes Dolls place, they'd be Similar in age to Cyn (aka I gotta give them a body design F)

Oh also, as for befriending the DDs -- whilst Ep1 would run similar to canon; after that Thad/T would bond faster with the siblings than Uzi/Z bc they keep their canonverse personalities mostly!! So that's a reverse. Also T wouldnt want to kill the Prom unlike V, he just genuinely wants to make friends 😭

Don't ask me why Beau is at the prom, being younger and all. Might just make it an all years general prom rather than just the graduating class.

Next AU yay

Blood & Bats is a Vampire/Human AU! DDS and Solver Drones are vampires, you get the gyst!

N & Cyn are bio siblings, got separated bc of a divorce. Eventually both were separately taken away for shitty parenting, one of which caused Cyn to get vampirism one way or another. She also has DID/OSDD1 in this AU, the Solver conciousness isn't an evil entity here, just s Persecutor under the definition of "Misguided Protector who hurts as a form of protection" -- they're basically just a terrified vampire kid who thinks they're a danger and thinks isolation is the only way to keep their lived ones safe.

At some point the Elliots adopt N, later Cyn too. They also have previously adopted V and J. As time goes on, the alphabet trio one by one get turned by Cyn/Solver but they catch her after that so Tessa never is turned.

Uzi is basically a half vampire. Her mom was one, her dad wasn't. I don't remember the details atm, but I assume I've posted them somewhere in the tag on my account, but iirc Khan killed Nori in a moment of shock and survival instinct when finding out. Uzi doesn't know this. She finds out later after being turned herself (on accident!) - either through N or Cyn. Might do N to draw a parallel to the miscommunication between ep 2 and 3. Bc yeah Uzi would assume it's on purpose and he broke a promise.

Once they fix things, she finds out about her dad killing her mom and she runs away from home, terrified he might kill her too -- she crashes at the siblings place OR Thads place. I'm not sure yet. Both have pros and cons.

Khan cant easily access the manor, needs to be at an event for it. But the parents would want Uzi OUT asap. On Thads end; Teacher (Thad and Lizzy are either step or half siblings idk yet) and Ron (uncle, moved in after his sister died to help with the kids!) Would not let Khan take Uzi home sending as they see her terrified. They don't know what happened. But Khan has easier access bc he's friends with Teacher and obviously Lizzy is there which Uzi isn't thrilled about.

That's as far as I can remember the storyline -- there would still be parallels to some episodes! Ep 4 would still happen! Just some would survive! Rebecca would be found by one of the alphabet trio and turned to save her life. She's wheelchair bound after that. Sam survives but everyone thinks he got too high and doesn't believe him when he talks rambling about Uzis vampire form (Becca keeps it secret bc like if she says something it by extension endangers the other vampires in the school which now includes herself)

Intertwined/Inteetwinjng Codes (Me when I keep going back and forth between both titles) is a next gen AU thing. It started off as a joke,,, oh well

Kids.

These little shits are twins, they started this whole rabbithole. They would boot up sometime after Ep 4.

Later on their parents would want to program another kid & adopt one. Invert Annika and Zagi, except unexpected thing happened and they now have two babies to upload. Insert Raven.

Annika is currently undergoing redesign, ignore how basic she looks compared to her siblings lol.

As for the last 2 kids -- they didn't WANT any more, but when being sent to another colony they run into this toddler with a baby, who are being attacked by other DDs so they step in. Whilst they argue with N, Uzi gets the kids to safety. They were gonna keep the kids at their place for that night but Olicia did NOT want to sleep in the same place as a DD & a ton of half DDs -- so Thad gets called at 3am 😭 hes the cool uncle to their kids so yk

Next day it turns out adoption wing is full, so the siblings get passed around Thad, Uzis dad and Nuzi a ton (their own colony got killed so they cant go back there) until Ray gets attached to Nuzi, and you shouldn't separate a baby from its bonded adults. Seeing as he already lost the code related parents, they didn't want to risk further hurting his programming. So the siblings were basically accidentally adopted by Nuzi, despite Olivia not being happy about it at first. But she didn't want to separate from Ray.

That's mostly that. Theres not too much lore tbh. Just a silly half joke AU.

Also I have 6 siblings IRL so I tend to like give my ship kids many siblings 😭 so ignore that fact lol, just projecting

Then theres like 3 more Cyn centric AUs.

2 are pretty small.

DD!Cyn AU that has no name yet is just the AS uploaded a copy of Cyn/the Base Drones conciousness into a DD body and kept her with the trio. That'll lead to major Identity crisis once Cyn realizes technically she's a clone and her memories aren't *hers*. Aside from that: Cyn and J constantly have beef bc of J abusing N, Cyn tries to get her to stop but just faces verbal abuse herself in return :(

Shes also pretty distrusting of Uzi at first bc like!! Nobody except Cyn ever spent time with N!! That's a Drone getting close to her big brother which possibly could hurt him in the long run if she turns out to be like the other teammates!! (She eventually warms up to her)

Then there is Trapped/Hivemind AU. Literally just Cyn trapped in the hivemind, unable to reach her body for control. She can HEAR the other Solver Drones and the DDs, as they're all part of the hivemind. But she can't communicate with them. No matter how hard she tries.

Especially when she hears N she will call out to him but not get a response

So shes probably on the brink of losing it

Then there is "Dormant" Absolute Solver

Originally it was gonna be "The AS lost interest in Cyn as a host" and ig it still kind of is correct-? I need to go back and forth between certain aspects lol

But long story short, Cyn now got a separate body from the AS, doesn't know it killed Tessa & comes to C9 with J & "Tessa". The AS just brought her as a tool to manipulate N with, but she doesn't know that. Cyn joins the group from ep 6 onwards. Yay more PTSD for the child I guess :)

I havent written out ep 6 yet but I think she'd be with N & "Tessa" for that part.

Ep 7 she ends up on the side of the rocks with Uzi, and walks at a distance after being told to basically F off bc Uzi doesn't trust her now but Cyn is scared to be alone. Uzi notices Cyn isn't okay tho.

(Varian tangled reference yay)

Might I add that seeing Uzis wings and tail in ep 6 would have majorly triggered Cyns PTSD but shes unaware of why she feels so scared. So seeing Uzis tail the whole time definitely adds onto the stress =)

During the fight Uzi would reach out to Cyn through the hivemind, both girls calling out to N through Cyns body. The AS doesn't like that and forcefully shuts Cyn down. It has admin rights over her after all.

By the time Cyn wakes up, the AS is grabbing her to blackmail N after just having eaten Doll. Talking about how he wouldnt want to hurt his baby sister (hes aiming his laser cannon at the AS for context). Then it gets bored, drops Cyn and the regular program ensures. Except Cyn took Tessas gun and shoots herself free from the tentacles and runs to the pit after seeing Nuzi be pulled in. Whilst shes there trying to figure out how to get them back up (seeing as she cant use her Solver on them, or at least not Uzi. The show us so unclear if it works on DDs or not) the scene goes on.

I'm not sure yet who Cyn will stick with, probably N bc I've more ideas. BUT also I'm waiting for episode 8 to decide that for sure. Same with the ending. I got multiple bad ending ideas and also a good ending :) ep 8 will determine which one will be canon :)

Oh yeah Cyn lol -- both new and old ref bc of the oil canister I didn't draw in the new one yet. She still has it as you can see by the oil tubes!

Also the Good!Ending DAS!N would run a Daycare post canon. IC!N also runs one. I just like having N work with kids.

Most of these (I think all except DD & Trappsd Cyn) are tagged on my account probably with some more info

Idk if the tags will show up tho bc they don't always for me when searching for them :(

My pinned post has the tags listed I think

I think that was all of them hm (istg if I forgot one 💀)

OKAY THIS ONE'S SUPER IN DEPTH I'M HEAVILY INTRIGUED. MULTIPLE AU'S DUDE!! I LOVE IT, KEEP EM COMING. Loving the ideas behind the swap AU. Putting Sam in Cyn's place is unique, I hadn't heard anyone do that before!! Also the thing about using pink is fair, I did use red but I didn't keep that in mind! A vampire AU's extremely fitting for Murder Drones, being a substitute for the Solver/Disassembly model. Since ep. 4 is my favorite, I love the fact it'd still play out here. Also I must say I REALLY like the next gen AU designs??? I actually kinda wish we saw more next gen stuff, or maybe I'm just not looking in the right places. Either way I very specifically love Rexim and Raven's designs, I think the color choices are really speaking to me. ALSO ALL THE CYN FANS ARE GONNA BE EATING UP THE CYN-CENTRIC AU'S. But it seems like the poor girl could never catch a break. WONDERFUL WORK ALL AROUND!!

[vaspider]

are you aware that "folks" is already a gender-neutral word? there's no need for the x, would love to know what gender you assign to the word folks and how adding an x changes it.

Are you aware that you can use "site:username.tumblr.com keyword" to Google search someone's Tumblr to see if they've already answered this question? There's no need to send an ask, would love to know what you think a snark-ass ask like this accomplishes rather than searching first and finding that there are answers on the first page of results.

Or! You could search "folx meaning" or "why do people use folx" or "queer folx" rather than assuming that I don't know that "folks" is already gender neutral and need you, random internet human, to "helpfully educate" me. You could instead assume that there's a deliberate reason and either do 30 seconds of searching yourself or like... just assume I know what I'm doing and leave me alone about it.

But, since it looks like you can't do that, here's a little cut-and-paste from one of the (many, many, many) previous times I've talked about this:

Speaking only for me (and yeah, I just went to look at your top posts bc of our exchange on another post) and for people from similar backgrounds, "folks" is very very common where I grew up, and isn't an indication of inclusion. It's a term commonly used by rural ppl, and it's a permanent part of my vocabulary. But. "Folks" is what my (extremely homophobic and transphobic) dad says all the time. "Hey folks" is his standard greeting to a mixed group of people. "Folks" is the word used by the people in my parents' tiny little church who instilled a fear of faggotry in me. "Folx" isn't. Folx provides a little mental space between me and my origins and permits me to continue to use that term without feeling like I'm putting my feet in that same water again. It is also a visual signal in writing for me in a way that "folks" simply is not. If I see someone using "folks" in casual writing, they may be cool inclusive people, ooooor they may be my dad and his buddies. Or worse, they may be someone using folk/folks in a white supremacy signaling fashion, which, you know. I live in Oregon now, and... yeah. That's not uncommon here. Seeing "folx" in casual writing is like seeing someone with a cute pronoun pin. They did that on purpose. It isn't a reflexive use of a word common in environments soaked in hatred of me and mine. It's a deliberate choice that says, "Hey, we're cool." YMMV, but I'm not gonna stop using the spelling. It lets me keep talking the way I've always talked without feeling gross about it, and seeing it from others makes me relax a little bit compared to just seeing "folks."

Hope that helps!

And while we're doing Education Time, here's a thread you should read about how not to be an irritating ass on social media.

[fatherdearest-kink]

mmff if i ACTUALLY remember to send this happy birthdayyy! shitty photo with my headphones shoved under my bed (dont ask why...idk either), i took this photo yesterday with INTENSE cramping so sorry if i look uncomfortable lmaoo, i took like 5 photos and i chose from those 5, and this was the best one i did (so yeah)... also no stomach because of how insecure i am </33 anyway try to enjoy the photo, idk i look really awkward in this and i hate ittt nnnggg i hate photos

(also im absolutely terrified of DM'ing ppl first so that's why it's in the ask me thingy lmao, i hate social anxiety so bad)

Like I said: A perfect way to start the day. What a pretty, delicious porn doll you are. I can't get enough of those fat tits begging to have my cock fuck them.

My eyes keep darting between my keyboard and the screen as I type while also staring at your pretty body. Daddy always wants to see more and more of you, after all~

Even though you had awful cramps, you still went through the effort of taking photos just for me; such a good boy~

You just can't stop being a mess, can you darling? Even though you're in pain, you're still a horny little cocksleeve whose pussy begs to be used, to be exposed. Truly a good toy, I hope to see more of you. 🖤

Your next challenge is to DM me. Today, you may use my birthday as an excuse. If you manage to do that, I will give you a nice reward.

Thank you for the birthday photo, Kayo.

[hoe4rairai]

Raian with Friends & Family 👥️

Requested by @aneenasevla

▪︎ let's be honest, Raian doesn't have friends. His feral nature, type of life he is leading and the lack of emotional and social intelligence. He knows one thing only, how to kill and destroy

▪︎ Fast forward, he's now around 27/28 I guess so I hope after his Grandpa's death he'd become little grounded and tasted how it feels like to loose someone he secretly cared for.

▪︎We also established that Raian is an Introvert mostly, so connecting with ppl other than those who prepare his missions at the back office isn't a habit of his.

▪︎ Raian, only considered one person to connect with and that was Ohma and still is. Not out of appreciation per se, but out of inner respect and as a kure, it runs in their tradition to respect strong challenging opponents.

▪︎Raian and Ohma, are mostly training together, yes they do have side conversations, tease each other. Raian mainly pick at Ohma and give him hard time.

▪︎ Will Raian ever be loyal to Ohma ? the answer is yes and no.

▪︎ Raian is an assassin from a ruthless clan his loyalty will always be to the clan #1 any one else can die or go to hell he couldn't care less.

▪︎With Ohma, apparently his only acquaintance, he will consider being there for if needed or if he felt its needed. Anything related to destroying count him in.

▪︎ Raian is possessive and the jealous type, so If ohma has another group of ppl he would hang out with or a GF , Raian will hate it and will make sure he'll speak filthy about them, make trouble and cause inconvenience to anyone . That was few years back

▪︎ Raian now, has a huge responsibility on his shoulder that even his friendship with Ohma is on a stop-loss till he get his revenge.

▪︎Raian knows Ohma is there for him and the clan because they allowed him to live among them and be part of them,however; he is very distant now, training non stop , have no time and had grow bit mature, so I hope .

▪︎ In Festival seasons, Raian would occasionally enjoy some Saki or beer pints with the clan , the firework, he's not a fun killer. Few years back he would had ended with fights after each and every celebration just for fun, now he is hardly ever seen socialising at all.

▪︎ Fusui his sister, she is probably the only one who has full access to him. Knows his moods and his where abouts, his missions and she does check on him every now and then. He sometimes answers with a ( F*ck off ) or keep her on read and send her the middle finger emoji , his way of telling her he's in an ok mood or doing fine.

▪︎ the time he didn't respond with 24hrs, Fusui gets worried. Listen guys, Raian is an Asshole we all know that but he's a rare treasure to the clan and he's a big ass stupid idiot trouble maker baby who might be going through hard time after grandpa got killed. I feel he's been in an inner conflict for some time now.

▪︎ Raian will either mature or becomes a nightmare unstoppable and unattainable.

▪︎ I Hear you asking about his parents: not sure but I think they dropped his case with his first ever kill. They don't hate him they just believe and certain that Raian is war God and they probably just like the rest of the clan members, know he'd destroy anyone who'd try to speak up or trade the Clan secrets or jeopardise their Safety. THAT RAIAN NO ONE SHOULD SEE .. lucifer himself will dethrone himself and run straight to hell saving his ass from Raian.

RAIAN & Gifts 🎁:

▪︎ He basically rips the cute nice ribbon apart , has an annoying look on his face, without much though given to the gift he picks it up from the box look at it : ( WDF IS THIS ) no thank you and no consideration. Just throws it away in hopes he'll use it one day.

▪︎ At school , Raian had few crushes but he crushed them back quite literally when the girl used to approach him shyly with his birthday gift but instead he slams her to the wall push her with his body, lift her skirt teasing her, grab the gift , opening it fast, looking at it , through to the ground , laughing at her crying face and walk away. Still for some reason girls at school liked him a lot ...

▪︎ fast forward, the only one who gives him gifts is YEP YOU GUESSED IT FUSUI ...

▪︎she buys him gifts everytime she goes on a mission, expensive perfumes, showr gels, expensive knives sometime, she gets him a branded trainer, she knows his size.

▪︎ Did he ever got her anything ? The answer is

NO NO NO

▪︎instead he always gives her his Credit Card .. that's what he does for her and she's okay with it.

▪︎ Raian as an assassin he earns so much more than her .

▪︎ Surprisingly though; I think Raian do have great taste , basic, clean with a twist. He never shops he only goes online to certain stores picks something he likes throw it at his sister face and still calling her a bitch 🤣

▪︎ Christmas and Gifts : let's not be delulus , Raian purposely choose a mission to get away from all the gatherings that annoys the shit of him.

▪︎ he comes back and he has gifts laying on his bed, he secretly gets excited and has a tiny little smile.

▪︎ he would probably receive a gift from Fusui, Holies, karura, the school girl crush who still with a hope and I guess few more from the close clan relatives, his mom will try to hug him but Lord his eyes and the way he'd look at her sents her back to her seat ...

I hope you enjoyed it 🤗😚

[otaku553]

I recall you mentioning once that you worked in a lab, do u have any advice for getting to that point? I want (read: NEED) to work or intern at a lab but I don’t rlly know what to ask the ppl running them lol

If I can help I'd be glad to!! Full disclaimer though, I am an undergrad junior and I go to school at a pretty reputable research institution so I may not be that much help because I've been pretty lucky and privileged to have direct access to many opportunities. If you're not a high schooler or undergrad student, my advice might not even apply to you at all. This got quite long, so I'll put this under a read more. If you have any more questions, feel free to dm me!

I don't know what your research interests are or what level of schooling you're at so I'll try my best to be broad. You're right that it's best to directly ask the person running the lab, the principal investigator (PI). Even if there's an official application process for fellowships or summer research grants or programs, usually already having reached out to a mentor is either a requirement or strongly encouraged. This applies for both university labs and I think rseearch agency labs like NIH, though I will say, a lot more of my advice will apply to labs at universities.

Understandably, though, it's really difficult to write that email, and quite disheartening that usually you'll need to write multiple emails to different PIs before even getting a reply back. One way to deal with this is to find a template online to copy, because word for word these emails usually go

"Hello [so and so], My name is [so and so] and I'm [brief introduction]. I'm interested in [what research this lab does] and was wondering if you have any positions available in your lab for [period you want to do internship during]. If you need them, my resume and transcript are attached. Thank you for your time."

You can delve into more specifcs in the body but it doesn't need to be long-- I think PIs tend to be quite busy, so being concise and direct is good, as long as you're genuine about what you're interested in. It doesn't need to be an essay or multiple paragraphs or anything! I find that usually 3-4 sentences suffices. If they want to know more, they'll usually ask to meet to talk about what you're interested in.

(On a side note, my roommate has an excellent strategy for dealing with anxiety when sending an email where you recite "fuck it we ball fuck it we ball fuck it we ball" while clicking send lmao)

Now, more specifically, if you're already attending a college that has labs, and professors who are PIs of those labs, it can be useful to take a class that the PI teaches and email either while taking the class or after the class and say "this class was very interesting and i was hoping to explore [so and so] further. Do you have any openings in your lab etc." If you don't have the time to do this, just cold-emailing the lab is usually fine too, but it's good to cite a connection I think? Also keep an eye out for any presentations or seminars that might be given by grad students or professors, since going to those can be a good way to express interest.

If you're a high schooler, you won't have the immediate connection, but I think most researchers would be impressed with the initiative to reach out and have no reason to refuse help. You might have a harder time finding a paid internship as a high schooler, but even with volunteering you can definitely get a foot into the door with research experience. I think a good way to start for high schoolers is looking into local university labs and expressing an interest in their work? Or reaching out to alumni of your school to ask for general advice and or opportunities.

If you don't receive an email back, you can send a follow up in two or three days. Sometimes emails can get pushed to the bottom of the inbox before they're seen, and it's no harm to just bump it again, with a little "hello! I wasn't sure if you'd seen this email. I'd like to follow up on this." (historically, I have been very bad at this, ahha). If you receive a negative response (which is pretty unlikely I think?) you can still thank them for their time and ask for advice regarding getting into research for their field of specialty.

I hope this helps! If you have any more questions, please feel free to ask or dm me. I will try my best to be helpful :)

[zmbiesvape]

people are lying about me, harassing me, stalking me (how are you getting a bunch of screenshots of my acc when I have you star, chirssy, and evb else that I know is close with you blocked.) and sending their friends to harass me & and innocent ppl. I made this blog because people were sending me anons threatening to rape my friends, not because I "didn't want to take accountability" I still stand by everything I said, moreso now actually. I just don't want to talk about a situation that happened TWO months ago just because an insane narcissist wants to drag it out. I haven't posted about it in MONTHS, but you keep posting abt it and unblocking me to dm me. also I don't remember ever even finding your TT acc, idk ur username on there, not that I care enough that I'd stalk you either way. I'm not sure what that was abt, I'm pretty sure one of my mutual reposted one of ur videos or smth. sorry abt that. I also never called you a rapist. I said you roleplayed rape, because you did. the thing I said about me being an sa advocate wasn't even about that situation. you just refused to acknowledge it and got mad that I didn't name drop. obviously you didn't fucking rape me holy shit. Im also an sa survivor myself, so u can stop saying "real sa victims" because I am. and not bc of you. not everything is about you jazz. also nobody that I talk to is sending you anons, so u can stop saying that thanks.

literally all I wanted was to be left alone, and the main reason I even got upset in the first place was because you wouldn't leave me alone. (I said that to you multiple times, not that I exaggerated the situation. cuz I didn't.) I've realized you're not gonna stop harrassing me, you're not gonna stop lying about me, and you're gonna continue to stalk me because youre so self centered you have to see what I'm saying about you even though I've said nothing for months.

calling me pathetic and saying I'm dragging it on when you've unblocked me MULTIPLE times to say some random bullshit and you continue to post about me is insane. you've also talked to my friends and lied about me, I've only talked to one person who wasn't involved in the situation, because they asked. everybody else that blocked you made that decision on their own based on what they saw. the ONLY times I've posted about this on this blog was when I told the anons to stop, unblocking star to tell them to stop posting about me (that's not a post but I felt like I should include it), and today.

I'm making a new blog again. stop unblocking me to spew your unmedicated bullshit, don't look for my new blog cuz you're already blocked, stop sending people to my page to harrass me (ik u r bc u admitted it. also one of the anons (they admitted to being an anon) was harrassing my Instagram and gave you the joke post I made that you've been using as "proof". unless you did somehow find my Instagram.) just stop talking about the situation. the only ppl that care atp are you and ur 2 friends. I wasn't the one who brought it here like you keep saying, you got mad over a private conversation (that happened after I'd already blocked you bc you don't know how to leave people alone) and took it to Tumblr! I made ONE vague post that I deleted like 2 mins later and you ran with it.

I could say so much more shit you'd done, but people are scared about coming out about what you did so I won't. I'm sorry you have to live with yourself knowing you're lying about me and so many other people while there's still so many ppl suffering in silence bc of what u did.

I'm also extremely sorry to anyone and everyone who got caught in the crossfire, nobody who was sent those gross insane anons or dmed deserved it. I'm also sorry to my ex mutuals who genuinely think I'm a horrible person bc jazz is so obsessed with this situation that she won't stop lying! love you all so much ^3^ dm me if u want my new handle!