#posting this after my last piece is kind of funny (crying) i think

[wrenkos]

guilt

[ckret2]

So a while ago some friends were talking about fans who claim the Same Coin theory is canon. And I made the mistake of saying:

Do you know who also has tons in common with Bill? Mabel. Yet nobody claims Bill reincarnated as Mabel. …wait now I want a "same coin but it's Mabel" AU. Funniest Bill reincarnation option. The all-seeing arsonist is making macaroni glitter art. The omnipotent tyrant is crying because a unicorn called her a bad person.

And then I overthought it for two months.

So—AU where after death, Bill's soul shoots 13 years into the past and reincarnates as Mabel. I'll call it ✨ Sparkly Coin AU ✨

Don't leave yet. Lemme show you why it works. Behold the eerie amount of parallels in their personalities, dialogue, behavior, mannerisms, tastes...

I could have kept going but my attention span ran out. All right, we all on board now? Convinced we could segue from one personality into the other? Great. Now here's why you should be interested: the juicy post-Weirdmageddon angst potential.

As long as a small fringe of the fandom still thinks Weirdmageddon is Mabel's fault, why not amp that up x100 and have some fun with it?

Is everyone sold now? Great. Let's get into the details. I've got 8 more pieces of art under the read more.

So the AU starts the instant Bill dies. Thanks to invoking his deal with the Axolotl—one way to absolve his crime, a different form, a different time—the Axolotl gives him a new shape and shoots him thirteen years into the past. Apparently, the Axolotl thought it would be very funny to stick Bill in the family that defeated him.

Which probably made for a jarring transition.

(It's fine, she's like 10 minutes old, she probably can't even tell who she's looking at. Not being able to tell who she was looking at is what got her into this situation ayyyy)

When Dipper & Mabel come back from Gravity Falls complaining about this triangular jerk Bill, their parents mention that Dipper's name was nearly Bill. See, after they knew they were going to have a boy, one night their mom dreamed about a visitor—some kind of magic pink salamander??—calling her child "BILL." Then at the next sonogram they found out they were having twins, the girl must've been hidden at a weird angle the first time, and they wanted matching names, so they thought, Bill and Bell. But they didn't really like Bell; but eventually they stumbled on Mabel, so to keep the names matching they switched from Bill to Mason. Isn't that the darnedest thing?

(Of course, Mabel and Dipper assume Bill harassed their parents to try to trick them into naming a kid after him. To be a jerk.)

When Bill meets Mabel, he's unaware that she's his future self—Bill's notably bad at doing things like, say, double-checking to see whether he's going to die anytime soon—but like... he can tell something's up.

Naturally, before visiting Gravity Falls, there were echoes of who Mabel used to be—but nothing anyone would be able to identify without context. All her Bill-ish quirks either smoothed out with time (see: how between second grade and fourth grade Mabel went from being the "freak" to the popular girl in class), or else they were accepted by her family as Mabel-ish quirks.

After they meet (and kill) Bill, they have the context to understand some of Mabel's behaviors... and unfortunately, some of Mabel's latent Bill-ness starts surfacing after she's been directly exposed to her prior incarnation.

The part of the Pines family familiar with Bill thinks the worst case scenario is that maybe Bill's survived and is slowly possessing Mabel; but far more likely, they think this is just some weird way of trying to subconsciously process last summer. Mabel doesn't think she's being weird, you guys are being weird, stop giving her weird looks. They get attacked by one triangle and now she can't wear yellow or pick up macrame as a hobby??

(It's not all red flags and uncomfortable triangle imagery, though. When Stan asks her what she'd like as a gift for some important event, she shyly admits that she thinks she's starting to outgrow her plastic gem jewelry and maybe she's old enough to get her first piece of real gold jewelry, if that's not too expensive? And Stan's never been so proud of her. Thirteen years old and already thinking about buying gold!)

But of course, the real fun starts when Mabel finds out.

That's the face of a girl who's just discovered that she tortured her great uncle. Now imagine running into the brother she possessed.

But I've already spent a million words and thirteen images on this post. If enough folks are interested in the AU maybe I'll expand on it later. Let me know what y'all think.

[velvetwyrme]

i eat up ur recs with a spoon and have almost gotten to the end of the list!!! do u have any other self insert recs? thank u! u have great taste

MWAH MWAH ILY !! THANK YOU and yes ofc I have more recs (not as many as last time, but it should still be a decent list to sink your teeth into <3)

Take care when reading, and always be sure to check the tags!

Same notation as last time, with STATUS of each fic labelled as such: Finished, Ongoing/Unfinished, Discontinued. (Unless the author specified that the fic is Discontinued or on Indefinite Hiatus, I will mark it as Ongoing/Unfinished. Oneshots are also marked as such.)

Spicy (Explicit) and/or Dark fics have also been labelled if relevant. (I won’t mark ones with just suggestive themes/moments, since I cant guarantee I’ll catch all of them. Similarly, unless there is consistent graphic death or gore I [probably] won’t mark it as dark.)

MULTICHAPTERS

As always, tread carefully while reading and take care of yourselves <3

Edit: Fixed a missing link or two!

These Masks We Wear - Underfell!Papyrus/Reader - Ongoing/Unfinished

TIME LOOPS BABEY!!!! This reader is a delight from the get go because they have been stuck in a time loop and are... rather impulsive because of it, which lands them in a bit of a mess, because these strange, dangerous monsters have just emerged from the mountain. (I'm screaming and yelling at this fic very intensely)

Resisting the Current - Various/Reader - Ongoing/Unfinished

If you haven't read this yet please do yourself a favour and read it. The premise was enough to get me irrevocably hooked (anti-harem but the gf is ALSO into you. ALSO SHE'S YOUR EX) and the writing is just FANTASTIC. I'm obsessed with the dialogue and description at every turn. Also, I would very much like to kiss Quinn please and thank you. The plot is beginning to set in now, and it's so good??? I have to cut this short or else I'll talk forever <3

ALSO the same author recently posted the first chapter of Wishbone which has me in a vice grip!!! AHH

Comic Classifieds - Sans/Reader - Ongoing/Unfinished

*kicks in the door* DID I HEAR... FAKE DATING? Very sweet VERY funny, with an extremely extraordinarily awkward reader. (Who is also "cute in an awkward, baby giraffe kind of way.") It's sooo good please please check it out.

Stolen with Friendship, Captured by Love - Papyrus/Reader - Ongoing/Unfinished

2016... I still love this fic deeply <3 It's so SWEET and it reminds me of the good days of fic... Papyrus is. a Lot to deal with, but the reader takes it all in stride. He is SO full of energy and I want to sqUISH HIM.

Tough Choices, Tougher Consequences - Underfell!Papyrus/Reader - Ongoing/Unfinished

I loooooove stories where soldiers get thrust into awful political matters. After you are forcefully removed from the battlefield, the Emperor gifts you his finest gladiator- Papyrus. He intends for the monster to be a toy to you as much as you are a toy to him, but you can't accept that and quickly broker a deal with Papyrus for his freedom.

Already There - Underfell!Sans/Reader - Finished

[Warning: INCREDIBLY SAD AND GOOD]

BURSTS INTO TEARS. Like for real though I adore this fic, it will break you into a hundred million pieces. My beloved son!!!!!!! I can't believe I didn't add this one to my last list it's such an influential piece of my existence like genuinely

There is also a sequel! Which hasn't updated since 2018 BUT STILL IS REALLY GOOD. If you want a slightly less heartbreaking story, the author also has another Sans/Reader; A Tale of Dog and Monster which makes me want to cry but in a happy emotional way instead.

Here's to You, Doll - Mafia!Sans/Reader - Ongoing/Unfinished

Ah... this one is very fun. You're a scientist who gets accidentally isekai'd into a Mafiatale universe and becomes stranded there. Unfortunately for you, Don Gaster and his brothers think you are a spy, so you're kinda stuck with them. Also Sans is kinda a little freak in this one at times (/appreciative)

Soul Collector - Various/Reader - Ongoing/Unfinished

The reader (the Soul Collector) gets transported into another universe and has to stay with their alternate, who is the skeleton's terrible neighbour. You look just like her, of course, resulting in a lot of VERY confusing interactions. I wasn't expecting to, but I actually really like Meyer.

Consequences - Papyrus(?)/Reader - Ongoing/Unfinished

Anti harem, but the reader gets mcfreaking MURDERED (and so does classic Papyrus?!) so now they are both Ghosts. Focus is currently more on platonic relationships and REVENGE but I'm enjoying the twist on the typical anti-harem structure!!

My Soulmate is a Pastel Goth (And Other Concerns) - Underfell!Papyrus/Reader - Ongoing/Unfinished

Edge is very cute in this and I also feel really bad for him, he's trying so hard but the MC will not give him the time of day ;w;!! I looove me a good tumultuous soulmate fic. (Note: this fic also features Fem!Frisk as Sans’ soulmate in the bg, so if you’re not a fan, that’s something to note ^^! Fr//ans isn’t quite my thing, but tbh I’m really interested in seeing how things turn out here!)

ERROR: Not Found - Error!Sans/Reader - Ongoing/Unfinished

Error, gets obsessed with the reader and kidnaps them! It's slice of life, so don't expect TOO much hard hitting angst here, it's more about being woo'd by the strange stalkerish entity who knows everything about you <3

When Death isn't an Option - Horror!Sans/Reader - Ongoing/Unfinished

[Warning: Contains Dark/Heavy Themes]

I'm a sucker for immortal readers, especially ones that get stuck in HORRORTALE of all places. This fic is very fun and plays in the Horrortale sandbox in a fun way- I'm enjoying it a ton so far :]!!!

Additionally... if you liked that or if you're like me and love immortal readers forced to make decisions of extremely dubious morality and sense because of their immortal nature, you should also check out Cadarverous and 𝚎𝚊t. which are both very dark and very compelling.

Babysitting with Extra Morbid Steps - Various/Reader - Ongoing/Unfinished

[Warning: Contains Dark/Heavy Themes]

So the first thing you need to know is: Papyrus is dead.

... WAIT WAIT WAIT HEAR ME OUT- this is a really brilliantly written fic about like. SO much fucked up shit happening. The reader is Sans' friend, who he has hired/tasked with guarding the various alternates he has. just straight up imprisoned(?!?!). I avoided this for a while because of the aforementioned Papyrus Being Dead thing, but HOT DAMN I'm glad I read it in the end. Delightfully horrifying, but it gets sweet I swear!!! I would say read the tags but those are Spoilery ;)!

Additional note; the comments section often has Really Interesting dissections of characters and their motivations, which if you're into that (like me) then you should read those too!

All You Knead is Loaf - Sans/Reader - Finished

[Warning: Contains Explicit Content.]

Super sweet, VERY punny fic that updated over the course of a month iirc. It's a cute food-centric Sans/Reader!

Like a moth to flame…or a lamp - Mothman Horror!Sans/Reader - Ongoing/Unfinished

BIG MOTHMAN HORROR!!! He's so sweet and sad this poor man. He has mistaken the reader for his mate and is trying to woo them again...

Those Times I Met His Brother - Sans/Reader - Finished

Essentially you befriend Papyrus and keep getting left with Sans, during which you grow closer. Love Papyrus' not-so-subtle attempts to get them together afjkdfjsf,,

Just Try and Help (Lil Old Hopeless Me) - Various/Reader - Ongoing/Unfinished

Skeleton reader! Very angy skeleton reader. They do not Want to be here (understandably, considering they were essentially kidnapped) but their former caretaker is gone, and they have nowhere to go.

Lovely House of Bones - Various/Reader - Ongoing/Unfinished

Six monsters get stranded in a snowstorm, and you help them not freeze to death by inviting them into the house you inherited. I'm really excited to see where this one goes :D!

Maybe In Time, You'll Want To Be Mine - Underfell!Sans/Reader - Ongoing/Unfinished

More!! Soulmate stuff!!!! SOULMARKS BABEY!! Love it when there are misunderstandings! Love it when there are cuuuuute background character kiddos!! AUGH it's cute! And angsty! But cute!!

No Good Deed - Underfell!Papyrus/Reader - Finished

You volunteer at a local homeless shelter where you meet a strange, less-than-friendly volunteer. Short and sweet!

Nothing but Skin and Bone - Horror!Skelebros/Reader - Finished

[Warning: Contains Dark/Heavy Themes]

MORE Horrortale content! This one only finished last month or so- it goes from angsty to sweet/cute and it's real good!!

If you read that and want EVEN MORE sadness and gore, the author's other work Vivid Blood, Pale Scars (DARK) is very tragic and very fucked up because you get saddled the Horrorfell boys this time. MUCH Hurt and No Comfort!! All the endings hurt me in different ways and none of them are happy. LUCKILY(?) the spinoff/AU where the skelebros and reader from VBPS get pulled into a multiversal skeleton house; Blurred Lines, Opened Wounds has just started!! Surely nothing can go wrong. Surely.

The Princes' Bride - Skelebros/Reader - Ongoing/Unfinished

What if you got kidnapped by the king to marry his sons. "Why" is a good question. And an even MORE pressing question is: how do you get OUTTA here. (Papyrus is a sweetie, Sans is distrusting, and King Gaster is a mysterious weirdo who is a good dad and bad everything else.)

MorTificaTion - Bad Sanses/Reader - Ongoing/Unfinished

Reader from Outertale gets yanked into Horrortale! They then have to masquerade as Sans' wife and Aliza's mother, all the while trying to just stay alive. Not to mention the other Sanses running around... really fun premise and I'm excited to see where it all goes >:0!! Also extra kudos to the name of the fic because YAY Murder Time Trio (MTT) mention!

So here's the plan... - Underfell!Papyrus/Reader/Underswap!Papyrus- Finished

[Warning: Contains Explicit Content.]

VERY CUTE!! Love them. Fake dating except there's a third conspirator involved. Each of them was also trying to set the other two up in a couple uwu. Chapter 1 is cute, and chapter 2 is spicy ;)!

Just a Cat - Swapfell!Skelebros/Reader - Finished

The reader is in fact, not just a cat. (He is a shapeshifter, and pretends to be a cat.) Shenanigans ensue.

An Apple a Day Keeps the Asshole Away - Swapfell!Sans/Reader - Ongoing/Unfinished

Unhinged. When I say unhinged I mean it in the best possible way but it IS unhinged. They're all a bunch of little FREAKS. Please read it, if only to experience the absolute TERROR of Miss Bluebell and also Steve. What the hell (appreciative)

Honey Lemon Tea - ...?/Reader - Discontinued

RAGHHH I'm so sad this was discontinued :(( I loved the set up and the mystery so much... the author did leave an end note with how the plot would have played out though!

Shifting Morals - Sans/Reader - Ongoing/Unfinished

You go stargazing and have an encounter with a mysterious stranger :0c?! (It's Sans. He's a cool beasty guy, and he is very very sadly Entirely alone.)

Additionally, this fic was suddenly revived 5 years after posting the first chapter which I have immense respect for.

The Key To Freedom - Yandere Buttontale!Papyrus/Reader - Finished

Yandere Papyrus! Not a common sight, but this fic does it particularly well. He mostly wants to eat your soul at first, but then he starts getting... attached. The bittersweet ending!!! AUGH.

Milky Tea and Souls - Various/Reader - Ongoing/Unfinished

What if you could summon bitty versions of your soulmates!! And oh stars why are there so many- WHAT DO YOU MEAN MORE KEEP APPEARING??? The reader has a handful of skeletons and more to deal with!

The House on Lane 66 - Various/Reader - Finished

[Warning: Contains Explicit Content.]

I feel like legally I have to include this (/lh /j). I finally finished it recently and went "WOAH..."

I stopped reading for a while (because of the length...) BUT I returned to it because I really really enjoy the world building (like holy SHIT!!!) but oh my god that sure is. a Million words now. It is TECHNICALLY finished, but that's only because the next part is in the works(?!?!?!)

Love Grows - Farmtale!Sans/Anomaly!Reader - Ongoing/Unfinished

🎵 Love grows where my rosemary goes~

The reader doesn't have a physical body or a way to interact with the world while they watch over Saejun and the rest of the Farmtale characters. They inhabit a scarecrow to have some semblance of personhood, but they remain unable to talk...

Falling - Underswap!Skelebros/Reader - Ongoing/Unfinished

[Warning: Contains Dark/Heavy Themes]

You are dying. You are dying and all of a sudden your dad is asking you to pick out a fucking slave of all things. The monster does not trust you (fair) and he thinks you are faking your illness for attention (less fair. what the fuck). Really interesting dynamics in this one!

Se Brûler - Grillby/Reader - Finished

[Warning: Contains Explicit Content.]

I reaaaally love this fic! Sweet fluff! Angst! THE DRAMA!!!!! AUAUUUUGH I have too much to say about it just go read it.

Early Bird Special - Sans/Reader - Ongoing/Unfinished

[Warning: Contains Dark/Heavy Themes]

Old fic that's still updating!!!! Really interesting plot that just keeps getting More Dramatic as time goes on (in a good way). It's a Slavetale AU, in which the reader ends up joining the resistance after a few chance encounters. The author also has a spinoff fic with the same premise but featuring Underfell instead, which results in quiiiiite a lot changing.

nemesis & nike - Various Horrorbros/Reader - Ongoing/Unfinished

[Warning: Contains Dark/Heavy Themes]

The reader essentially starts off in a zombie apocalypse and then gets transported into an alternate universe where they initially think that the various skeletons they meet are zombies. Turns out they are not in fact, zombies, but like most of them still want to kill the reader so...

Rules to Survive the Zombie Apocalypse - Swapfell!Skelebros/Reader - Ongoing/Unfinished

[Warning: Contains Dark/Heavy Themes] [Warning: Contains Explicit Content.]

More zombie apocalypse stuff! Except this time you're stuck there with a pair of weird skeletons! You give them nicknames so you don't get attached, but of course you end up getting attached anyway.

To My Horror - Horror!Skelebros/Reader - Ongoing/Unfinished

Post-surfacing Horrortale fic where the skelebros get to go live their farming dreams. With you! Slice of life with a dash of intimidation and angst.

If you enjoyed the Horrortale/Farmtale fusion, you'll be glad to hear there's also...

The Skeleton Stalks - Horrortale!Sans/Reader - Ongoing/Unfinished

Another Horror-farm-tale fusion which has just begun recently! You live on a farm and all of a sudden there is this Big Intelligent Dog hanging around. Eventually, your new neighbors are sent to check in on you and your Great(er) Dog, which leads to some sweet interactions.

The Ruse - Swapfell!Sans/Reader - Ongoing/Unfinished

This is a rework! I read the original fic while it was being originally posted and I ADORED it, and the rework is superb <3 Sans is the Captain of the Royal Guard, who must fight valiantly against the villanous Eclipse, who exists only to spread terror... and you're just some human chilling on the sidelines, posting treasonous Soriel posts on the Undernet.

I'm so so so excited for it to return auauusgfhfhdj THE ORIGINAL FIC IS GONE SO I CAN'T EVEN READ IT TO SATIATE ME...

Almost Alone - Swapfell!Papyrus/Male!Reader - Finished

I love the sleepy, slow atmosphere this fic has- it's so befitting of both SF!Pap and the MC in this. It's soft and sweet and melancholic auauuauauuughgh I LOVE IT... *bursts into tears again*!!!! Also, there is a side fic which follows different POVs throughout the story, which is similarly well written!

=========================

ONESHOTS

Date night Purring - Underfell!Papyrus/Reader - Oneshot

SUPER CUTE (and slightly suggestive)! Also Edge has a feminine body in this which is always fun. Booba <3

Scares and a Sudden Friendship - Horror!Sans/Reader - Oneshot

Reader's shitty boyfriend leaves them behind in the haunted house in which HT!Sans is working as a scare actor. Sweet little meet cute! (Meet spook?)

Fallen Star - Underfell!Gaster/Reader - Oneshot

An ooooold fic but one that never fails to break my heart. Written from the perspective of UF!Gaster recording experiment logs about the newest fallen human.

Birdy -Mafiafell!Sans/Reader - Oneshot

LET THE BIRD FUCK SHIT UP!! I love the way the Avian... siren(?) reader is characterised... there's also another oneshot in the same series which I enjoyed- love me some weird Creature Body Horror!!

I also really enjoyed the author's other fic: Moss & Mycelium, wherein the reader is a skeleton :]!!

Skeleton's Curiosity - FellswapGold!Skelebros/Reader - Oneshot

SUBNAUTICA AUUUUUUUUUUU YEAAHH BABEY!! I love mermaid AUs and I love Subnautica! Real cute!

Chance Encounter - Underfell!Papyrus/Reader - Oneshot

ANOTHER SUBNAUTICA AU :D!! Except it's just UF!Pap this time <33 !!!

Leaving A Mark - Sans/Reader - Oneshot

The twist(?) made me laugh so hard I almost cried. It's VERY cute also.

Nice to Scare You - Various/Reader - Oneshot Series

A fun series of oneshots of the spookier variety! Or more Halloween-y at least. All very good <3

=========================

MISC. / OTHER

The Escort - Lust!Sans/Reader || &Reader - Finished

[Warning: Contains Discussions of Explicit Content.]

No romance! (But lots of kind-of-onscreen fucking.) This fic feels like looking at a bunch of polaroids, seeing a snapshot of existence. Life out of context. And it works SO well. It makes me feel sad and existential and I really love it.

Rubble & Ramparts - (An R&R-Inspired AU Fic) - Various/OC || Various&OC - Ongoing/Unfinished

Not a reader insert, but it's like. An AU of a reader insert so I'm including it here!!! Rubble and Ramparts is of course, inspired by R&R (Rabble & Rampallians), which was on my previous list but is getting linked here again for ease of navigation

ALEXIS my beloved!!!!!!! I am in loooove with the way things are going in this fic. It's so COOL and Alexis is such a freaking DELIGHT. Also I just really love reading all the notes from the Cutting Room floor, which the author has kindly included in a separate fic for your reading pleasure!!

ALSO in writing this I also remembered there is Another Spinoff AU fic which IS a reader insert (that I'm enjoying)...

Perception & Patronage (An R&R Spinoff) - Various/Reader - Ongoing/Unfinished

Thank the stars I remembered this, it's really fun!! Also judging by the tags there is also plans for. not only Various Sanses/Reader, but also READER/READER, which is such an underrated thing I love it, but I digress. It's a really fun spin on a really fun fic <3

Teen Livin' - Various Skelebros & Reader + Frisk/Reader - Ongoing/Unfinished

[Warning: Contains Dark/Heavy Themes]

Cute and sad! Platonic reader insert. The reader is a troubled teen who befriends Frisk, and gets to meet a bunch of skeletal guardians. The skeletons have a familial/friend's cool cousin vibe with the reader, which is really sweet! The fic is currently going through a Halloween Special which I'm enjoying quite a bit (Haunted dolls! Ghosts! Blood!! Still very sad :[...)

Something Good - Fellswap Gold!Papyrus/Reader(?) || /OC(s) - Ongoing/Unfinished

Technically not a reader insert since Coffee is the MC, but I can forgive it because I'm really really invested in this and I really adore the character dynamics so far <3 Coffee striking it out on his own is always a fun thing to explore, and I'm excited to see more!!

=========================

I love writing up these rec lists- it's such a fun way for me to rediscover fics I've enjoyed, thank you for giving me another opportunity to reread some of my favourite fics and more importantly to share them with you! I hope you enjoy them as much as I did :D!!!

I'll probably leave it here for now or else I'll end up rereading fics forever lolol it's already like 3am I gotta sleep SOMETIME

[mairon-goth-minion]

time for James (this follows my Regulus post (which follows my Barty post (which follows my Evan post)))

James Potter who grew up surrounded with love and affection

James Potter who’d never known anything but kindness

James Potter who’d thought that everyone was just as happy as him

James Potter who felt physically sick when he learned about what all of his friends had had to endure in their childhood

James Potter who was most touched by his best friend’s story

James Potter who, the day he meant his best friend’s younger brother, at his friend’s house to retrieve the last of the belongings as he ran away, felt like he’d just seen the most beautiful creature he’d ever seen

James Potter who ever since couldn’t keep his friend’s brother out of his head

James Potter who nearly fell off of his broom at ever Gryffindor-Slytherin game because oh Merlin, that Seeker was goddamn magnificent

James Potter who wished he could just hold the object of his affection and tell him just how much he loved him

James Potter who thought that he’d just end up hurting both of them if ever he confessed, as everything seemed to want them apart

James Potter who tried his best to fall for that smart, pretty, stoic and funny girl who everyone thinks he likes

James Potter who hated himself for loving one he can’t have instead of the one he had

James Potter who simultaneously died inside and felt so alive whenever his crush passed near him in the hallways, though calling it a crush was now quite an understatement

James Potter who would have died thousands of time just for his ‘unrequited’ love to kiss him

James Potter who, when he read about the Heir of the House of Black’s death in the Daily Prophet, on a normal morning, felt his heart shatter into pieces, sinking to the ground, and screaming, and screaming, and screaming, and screaming, and crying, and crying, and crying, and crying, until his voice was gone, until there were no tears left inside of him to cry, until he was hollow and empty

James Potter who, when Voldemort came for him and his wife and his child, yelled at them to run, while not moving an inch himself because dying meant that he’d see Regulus Black again

“Regulus. Reggie. I wish I could’ve called you that. Maybe we’ll find each other, after all of this. Maybe there’s another universe where I wasn’t me and you weren’t you, and where I could have asked you out without facing society’s repercussions. Maybe, if I’d been just a little braver, we could be living together, and I could wake up next to you every morning, hold you tight and tell you that I love you more than the Sun loves the Moon. I would give the world to you, my Reggie, my north star, guiding my way, now gone and leaving me alone and lost. I’ll find you, Reggie. I’ll find you, my star. And I’ll love you more than what you believe you deserve, because you deserve all the love in the world. I love you. I love you. See you, angel”

[sollucets]

beloveds @khaotunq, @pranink & @alexshenry tagged me to do:

every month of 2023! list your favorite/most popular gifset for each month.

i started making gifs in march this year, so january/february are off the table for this. it's funny that it hasn't even been a full year yet. it seems both somehow a lot longer and also like i remain some kind of photoshop baby at the same time. the images in this post will remain undescribed until i have some energy in my failing body, unfortunately

in any case:

march: midnight museum invades all 2 of my braincells. i download photoshop. the end is nigh

most popular: msp/eclipse pool parallel set

favorite: the bams i made for sof

(notes: it's hard to look back at these lmao. what is coloring and why don't i know her. why is everything so dark. who told me to use noise dithering and why did i ever think that was a good idea. anyway)

april: the eighth sense is airing! i meet many mutuals and friends. i figure out about the curves tool (thank god)

most popular: taehyung getting dunked on

(very deserved dunk; very bad set. the coloring of this scene was extremely questionable and i did nothing to fix it it looks so dull and gray. augh)

favorite: feet lining up / jihyun & jaewon on the beach

i really like this coloring actually. it's bright enough to actually see them, their skin doesn't look as weird, and i like the soft pink i made the beach. a win for baby photoshop user rowan

may: the purple is in full swing now

most popular: purple yok

first set to cross 1k! the purple is still very good but in hindsight there are things i now know i couldve done to help his skin. in any case. a banger. beloved

favorite: pink our skyy 2 hands set

[through tears] you're my space. also my first try at typography

june: i lose the will to gif some in the back half of this month, but i also learn to do a Lot of new things, like gradient maps & more complicated typography and transitions and such

most popular: puzzle piece hugs!

deserved! hard to gif and fun to look at

favorite: i think it might be the heartliming i made for vi now! but i still like khathadome from eden too.

july: i try giffing a few different shows. the only friends trailer comes out on the last day and i enter some kind of terrifying fugue state

most popular: sand and ray fighting / crying in the ofts trailer

do you guys remember the trailer 1080p? life was so good

favorite: nobody appreciates my ride enough

august: only friends airs, eclipse anniversary is concurrent, i lose my mind. i also learn to use the method of brightening that i still use & several other fundamental gif tricks

most popular: sandray car makeout

good for them! i start using significant grain on my ofts gifs from here on out and can never decide how i feel about that

favorite: orange/blue eclipse episode seven set

september: the madness continues

most popular: sand cooking for ray / special

ive giffed this scene three times and this is my least favorite coloring but what can you do. this is my third post to cross 1k

favorite: new rules set! i had mixed feelings when i posted it but it's really grown on me.

october: the madness is so much worse. only friends ends and i am left near-catatonic immediately, apparently. also, i learn to blend and use overlays and some other cool things. i join userdramas :'>

most popular: raysand afterglow. as it should be. cheek kissie

favorite: space girl!! show me the stars!!!

loved making this. purple and sparkly and gay. still super proud. that said other runner-up favorites in october are ray's o-face & the boyfriend shirt & akkaye's thumb thing collection

november: i am left cavernously empty after ofts ends and i fill the void with namtan

most popular: last twilight episode one porjai

she <3

favorite: gaipa userdramas set

again, i learned to use musescore for this set just so i could have those pretty notes. :')

december: i am punched in the face by seasonal depression. all is not well. i made just one gifset this month, but at least it was good? :')

and here we are today !! it was very fun to look over everything; thanks so much for playing and have a happy new year everyone

[ryuichirou]

Replies

A couple of replies today.

Anonymous asked:

Hell yeah, I’d get a daki from you. Also, Edmund as a body pillow? I’d eat that right up! (You can take that literally or figuratively.) Also a Lilia daki would be sexy af. Hmmm, depending on my cash situation later, I’d love to get an Idia dakimakura. The thought of his over flustered face makes me positively FERAL.

Ahh thank you so much, Anon! <3 Of course, feel free to message me about an Idia dakimakura or anything else whenever you want. He is the most perfect fit when it comes to characters to be put on daki, to be honest…

I am also very happy to see you feel that way about the possibility of Edmund as a body pillow hehe I would also love to eat it up both literally and figuratively. This boy is very eatable.

eh-nonnie-mouse asked:

I am sending this ask in super late but your guys piece with mountain Jade killed me. Like seeing the canon art was so cute and handsome and then the groovy had me on my knees clutching my heart and then your interpretation just KO'd me , just like he probably KO'd the poor soul who found him. I could see that one sketch (I think it was you two) where Jade and Rook pass each other in the woods with unidentified long black bags that suspiciously look like people.

But I was revived with the latest cute fucking Octo Trio in Isle of Lamentation and ASFGKJ I am so FERAL for that group of characters. (Not me up here crying in the club at Orthos HUMAN?! cute excited face omg 😭)

Is this Idia's dream and that's why he looks so shocked or is he super concerned because EELS are going to corrupt his baby bro!

Oh and how soft Azul looks at Idia, like they are group of highly disfunctional people who are a little (a lot) crazy for each other in all sorts of ways 🫠 but they are so pretty!!!! and WHY can't Floyd keep his clothes on ahahaha. He's just waltzing around half naked like a gladiator of old and everyone else is dressed appropriately. Orthos excitement over shoes is so cute! Is he looking at Floyd showing off his cool kicks (cause that eel is a certified sneaker head(?) Shoe fanatic?)

And as a last thing. Kalim is like an Asian parent in the way they show their affection through 'You vaguely like something? Here's a lifetime supply because I don't know how else to show my feelings'. Like I know it's just how Kalim is, very open with his affections for Jamil and he probably thinks money and gifts are the best ways to display that. Especially if Kalim can't get as touchy feely and handy as he would like but it just reminded me of that behavior.

No worries, thank you for sending asks!! I am always replying after like 4 months, so “late” doesn’t exist here; time is a flat circle lol

I am very happy you liked that Jade drawing, and YES it was me who drew that doodle of Jade and Rook lol We really love a forest as a creepy setting in general, so I just keep defaulting to something spooky whenever I draw anything related to it. And Jade’s new card was the perfect opportunity!

Jade really is a cryptid from the mountains… And apparently a very charming one 😭

Igni+Octa is such a good combination, I can’t get enough of them! I’m happy you also like them together!! <3 Ortho would always get along with Floyd lol The Tweels are bad influence on him.

It isn’t necessarily Idia’s dream, it’s kind of like an AU? We just wanted to put them in a setting that has vibes similar to Ancient Greece. But you are right: Idia is terrified because while he was talking to Azul, Ortho got completely enamoured by a pair of cool sandals… what else these creeps (fellow shoe fanatics!) are going to give him??

It’s so funny that you noted that Floyd just can’t keep his clothes on, we were wondering the same thing. I drew this sketch a while ago and coloured it the day we posted it, and the entire time I was unsure if I should dress him a little… I guess nah… he really is a gladiator at heart lol

You also completely nailed it about Kalim! I do think that he would love to shower Jamil with gifts, and to him it’s just like little ways to show appreciation and affection… when you are used to your family buying a whole-ass amusement park for one day just because you wanted to hang out there once, getting your beloved Jamil a lifetime supply of chocolate doesn’t feel too crazy at all!

Thank you as always for your kind review of everything that we post <3 I’ll reply to your other ask too!

eh-nonnie-mouse asked:

PEAKED NIPPLE ALERT!

ok sorry sorry but is Deuce going to get stuck again? Because that would be hilarious. Jack can't help himself when his Athletic rival is under him. Do you think they do this frequently? Working out does increase the blood flow and those running outfits are pretttttty tight.

YES!!

Also yes, this is very likely lol It’s a bit difficult to say if it’s them getting too riled up because of them training together, or it’s because Jack would develop a Pavlovian reaction at some point… He sees Deuce in those shorts – things happen :”( <3

Anonymous asked:

If Deuce tugs on Jack's tail, will Jack-

1. Yelp

2. Growl

3. Moan

:3

Anonymous asked:

Hi, I'm the "Deuce pulling on Jack's tail" anon. I forgot to add-

He does it at a random point during the day. Like, just walking behind him and just grabbed it and pulled.

(forgive me for forgetting to add this, I feel bad for sending in two asks for one question....)

I think it depends on what is on Jack’s mind at that time. It’s not entirely impossible for him to produce a sound that is too close to moaning… that would be embarrassing…

But in all honesty, I think he would yelp. Which would also be embarrassing because this is too much of a puppy-like reaction. He isn’t a kid anymore..!

If it’s someone else or Jack doesn’t see it’s Deuce who’s touching his tail, I think he’s going to growl though. The boy’s ready to attack lol

[cyberdragoninfinity]

Sora mayhap? 🍭

SORAAAAA 🥺

Why I like them/why I don’t: im a turbo sucker for "character effectively raised to be a weapon learning how to make friends and exist as like. a Person" so sora makes me bonkers yonkers. his character arc is so good in a show full of Kind of Fumbled Character Arcs. he's not just an impish Little Fucker™ but then he turns into a certified REAL ONE!! A RARE AND BEAUTIFUL GIFT. he loves his friends with his whole heart and his deck rules and it will never not be funny that every time he's in shot he has somehow acquired another piece of candy and/or dessert. I KNOW HE IS STICKY!!!

What I like about their appearance: i love that the aforementioned candy is like basically part of his design at this point. they need to make a sora figure that comes with the lollypop. also his color palette!! the polymerization colors!!! WAAUUGHH

Do I prefer their dub names or original names?: pretty neutral to both his last names.. I do love that they both have etymologies tied to the color purple!!

OTP: im an aro sora truther so i dont really have oneeee.... we were cooking some insane toxic middle school yaoi in dimensionswap AU with sora and yuya and im still fond of it though

NOTP: i see sora/shay a lot and i gotta say, not a huge fan. age/maturity gap that doesnt feel great and in general i just dont rly think shay would be interested in dating someone largely complicit in All That Shit That Happened to His Home even if they repented. shrugs

OT3: mentioned this when i talked about yuya but yuya/sora/zuzu is very sweet.....

Favourite card they use: GAAAH HARD TO PICK AGAIN. I LOVE FRIGHTFURS. i think i gotta give it to either Frightfur Tiger or Frightfur Sabretooth.... my two dear friends i always have so much fun with in tinks. i love Tiger's weird cackle they gave it in-show.

Favourite moment they were in: everyone and their mom is gonna say the sora-shay duel and i get it, it's a great duel, but im sooo so fond of a lot of Sora's smaller moments that show just how much he cares about yuya and zuzu especially. going out of his way to show Yuya zuzu's helmet and prove she's safe during the friendship cup. when he and zuzu beat the shit out of those cops. when sora duels zarc and he's FUCKING CRYING. OVER YUYA. AAHH. LITTLE BABYMAN

Least favourite moment: i think we actually did talk about this but it's so weird that just like. made sora go back to Fusion after the zarc battle and hes just hanging out there?!??! put him back in Paradise City right now HIS FRIENDS ARE THERE!!!

Something I associate with them: this genre of post

[maestro04yayyy]

So some times ago i posted here the start for my antivillain au fic, today I continued it a little, i am not sure if I will leave it like this when and if I post it on ao3, actually i think this is where i should stop the first chapter, i think it is a good point but I wanted to do longer chapters and this is kinda short(1268 words).

This aside please if you want read this and comment or give me tips or insult me I don't know

“remember to eat at least four times a day”.

“yes chloe”

“and to drink lot of water”

“yes chloe”

“and if roger says anything stupid to you just call me, i will give him a piece of my mind”

Sabrina smiled sadly, eyes blinking quickly to avoid shedding tears before throwing herself against Chloe to hug tightly her best friends,  “thanks Chloe” she hiccuped sometimes before stating,”I will be very lonely while you are away…”.

Chloe's heart clenched painfully hearing the sadness in her voice and once again cursed herself for not having been able to skip the family trip, but right now Sabrina was the priority.

She hugged her friend back and started drawing circles in her back to help calm her down, in other circumstances she wouldn't do that in public, especially where her family could see them, but now it wasn't important for her.

“Hey Brina, don't worry, it's just for a month and you can call me anytime, no matter the time or how many times a day” Chloe stated while kissing her friend's forehead, not caring that tears and snots were ruining her clothes.

Sabrina just continued to cry, not letting go of Chloe when Chloe had an idea.

“Hey Brina, why don't you try to hang out with our classmate while I'm gone? i am sure that adrien would be happy to do it if he is free, Alix too and ugh dupain-cheng would immediately throw you some kind of party with the whole class, this way you wont feels as lonely”

That made Sabrina pause a little, enough to stop the tears at least, as she moved her head slightly to look at her friend's face while still resting her chin against Chloe's chest.

“it wouldn't be the same, they aren't like you….” she said that but Chloe could see in her eyes that her friends were still thinking about it.

“Of course they aren't like me, nobody is even near my level of perfection, beauty, confidence and humility,” she said with a smile on her face.

It made Sabrina laugh, initially it was just a smile, then a chuckle but after that she had to use Chloe for support while she bends over laughing.

Chloe gave her a playful shove, “what's so funny? i am only saying the truth”

Sabrina pulled herself together after a good minute, still smiling widely and while clearing her face with her sleeves she simply said,”yes, you are”, and Chloe felt her eyes watering a little.

“CLAUDIA!!! what taking you so long! come here immediately or we are leaving you here!” audrey yelled from the base of the plane, a public one, andre didn't want to use a private jet so near to the next elections, something about complains about the environment or social classes, chloe doesn't really know, she didn't listened to his explanation just like she did not listened to audreys loud and useless complains.

Chloe frowned a little at the name but also rolled her eyes, “if only she could actually do it” she said with a sigh.

she kissed the red head one last time on the forehead, “give it a try Brina, you got nothing to lose” she then added with a soft smile,” i will be back before you say supercalifragilisticexpialidocious”

Sabrina tried to repeat the word but fumbled on the second sillabe, she blushed a little but gave Chloe her goodbyes anyway.

Sabrina goes back to her father, who is waiting for her inside the airport while Chloe turns her back and hastily takes a few tissues from her bag to clean herself before Audrey can notice and complain about her getting dirty while she walk inside the plane.

Thankfully that woman didn’t seem to notice or care about Chloe's appearance once she got inside.

so she just get to her seat and put her violin case in its spot and sit, dropping her bag one her legs.

she rest her head against the seat while taking a deep sigh

“ehm…hi chloe” chloe just glances to her side, to the seat next to hers, and just sees the nervous and fidgeting figure of her step-sister or how she likes to call her “the liar”.

“hello” she deadpans

Her very unenthusiastic reply seemed to only increase Zoe's discomfort and nervousness until she went completely silent but kept fidgeting with her hands.

Chloe glared at her and she finally stopped moving.

A few minutes later the plane took off and Chloe was really really glad her parents were on the other side a few seats away, she doesn't think she can stand being near her mother for so long.

if only the liar would stop moving so much…..

“god zoe, why are you so fucking nervous!” she stated, pointing her index finger at her.

That seemed to do the trick since she went completely still. but Chloe just stared at her until she finally opened her mouth to answer.

“You and Sabrina are really close” she blurted out and Chloe had to take a moment to process what she said since she didn’t expect that answer.

she eyed her cautiously but agreed,” yeah we are, ever since we were three”

“oh” was all the damn liar said and Chloe could feel her blood rushing a little faster as she clenched her hands on the armrests of the chair.

she glared at her, “you are avoiding the question” she declared, already frustrated.

This made her look away and Chloe had half a mind to hit her but after a couple of deep breaths she looked back at her and said, “it’s….” She paused and looked away again, her eyes darting everywhere in the plane besides Chloe but finally she continued, still looking away from her and her eyes blinking rapidly, “it’s my father….i..i don’t know if i am ready to see him again….”

Chloe's eyes softened a little at that, “ how is he? Audrey's level of asshole or Andre's level?”

“Andre isn’t so bad” Zoe immediately defended him.

Chloe just rolled her eyes and prompted her to answer the question with a not so gentle elbow to her side.

“hey!” she complained but after seeing chloe’s glare answered the question, “ he isn’t as bad as audrey…..i think, i-i never really saw him very much” Chloe could relate to that but said nothing.

“ He just dropped me off at that boarding school. full of snob, rich brats as soon as he could…... .the only memories of him that i have are those of my childhood but…”

“ There isn't much even there right?” Chloe finished for her.

Zoe just looked up at her, “yes…”

Chloe took a long look at her…..sister and sighed, “you know you don’t have to see him right?”

the wide eyes she gave her made Chloe chuckle a little,” why are you so surprised? this trip is only because ANDRE wants to meet him, you or i can do whatever we want and just avoid him” she said smiling.

“Are you sure chloe?” she asked with such earnest and hopeful eyes that Chloe couldn’t resist the action to pet her head affectionately.

“yes, i am. and even if he shows i will just punch him in his shitty face” she said confidently, making her laugh.

Chloe smiled a little wider at the sounds, she looked just like Adrien a moment ago after all and Chloe would do everything to protect him.

but the moment passed and went away and Chloe spent the rest of the flight listening to music and ignoring The Liar.

[raintouchedstars]

The Window At The End of the Road

Summary: Years of survival and fighting for freedom, for a life of her own and all she was left was this. This place, this window, her curse...and him.

Author's Note: An enemies to lovers short piece from a story that I had long since abandoned, but wanted to post it anyway. The characters in this are both immortal adults, 10 years apart but well into their 100s. Though there is nothing too explicit in this story, reader discretion is still advised, mentions of war, trauma, violence, and survival.

The clouds rolled over the city, drenching it in rain that made the buildings look shiny and new. Liana pressed her forehead against the thick floor to ceiling windows of the penthouse, looking down at the blurry lights far below. It should be beautiful, watching the cars move, creating colors like smears on a canvas. Not for her though. The war, the days spend slaughtering one crazed monster after another, the nights spent shivering in terror, unable to sleep for fear of being found. Vulnerable. Unprepared.

Thunder screamed across the sky, and Liana felt like crying with it. There was only one battle left. One fight, against the demon that started it all. The sun would rise tomorrow, and the humans would have no idea of the rage that would be unleashed with it. Would not even know that their entire existence hangs in the balance.

And here she was. She had run away from her family, her friends, all so that could follow him. He would be there at the battle tomorrow. He would not fight on either side. But no matter the victor, she knew he would walk away with prizes no one else would even consider.

He would come back here soon, to this penthouse, that he most likely stole. She wondered whom this house belonged to, and how he had tricked people into giving it to him. The receptionist on the first floor acted as though she knew Liana, and gave her a spare key, no questions asked.

He was waiting for her.

She thought about the last time she had willingly come to him. It had been raining that night too. She had remembered their shared past, and the pain of the truth had made her run to him, demanding to understand why he had chosen to be who he was.

How funny.

She understood it all now. It was so easy to fall below the ice once that barrier was cracked. She was no better than he was now. A monster.

She knew the moment he stepped into the penthouse. There was no grand entrance, no door rattling as the keys were turned. Nothing. Except the pressure of his presence. And his scent.

He always smelled like the clear sky after a rainstorm. How a man that dark would always smell that clean was a mystery to her.

She didn't turn. She saw his reflection in the window glass. A pleased smirk spread across his face.

"Well, well." He shed the outer layer of his suit, revealing the white dress shirt underneath. "I was wondering how long it would take before you came to find me."

Liana turned. Her heart was screaming, her mind did not agree with her eyes and ears, but there he was. Tall, relaxed, an easy smile hiding the cruelty behind his beautiful green eyes.

"I killed you," she whispered.

He pulled his hands out of his pockets, his smile fading, his steps relaxed and slow as he moved toward her.

"I wrung your neck. I can still feel the snapping in my hands. You were dead for three years! You can't be real!"

He came close, till his body pressed against hers, pinning her between himself and the window. "Do I not feel real?"

Liana sunk her claws into his shirt, ripping the white fabric, staining it with red.

So he was real.

"Then explain, Isak."

She hissed, curling her fingers, drawing more blood. He narrowed his eyes.

"Explain why I remember something that didn't happen. Did you make me think I murdered you in cold blood? Is that it? Did you want to make me into a monster just like you? To prove some kind of sick point? I was nothing like you! I never took pleasure in killing! I did what I had to-to survive! Did you put memories of me wanting to destroy and main in head? Did-" Her lungs seized, not letting her continue. Breathing burned as she tried to suck in air through the rising panic.

Looking up, into a set of calm, green eyes, the one physical attribute they shared, she tried to search for some form of confession.

Isak he grabbed her wrist, and pulled her claws out of his chest, the wounds already closing. He held her hands in his, pulling them over her head, looking down at her from between his own arms.

"It's flattering that you think I'm powerful enough to change someone's memories, but no. I did nothing to your mind, except put you back together after you escaped from Narcius the first time."

Isak squeezed Liana's hands. All the years she'd spent, running and hiding in the Second Plane, the world that existed alongside the human world, ran through her mind. He was telling the truth. And it did nothing to ease her pain.

"Why would I want you to believe you had killed me?"

He let go of her hands, and they feel limply to her sides.

"I have nothing to gain from it. But Narcius does. And now, I can see why."

She couldn't hold herself up anymore. She would have crumbled to the floor, if Isak hadn't wrapped his arms around her ribs. He held her up, her feet floating in the air.

Liana slammed her fists down on his shoulders and back. "I don't care why he did it! I was never cruel before that lie! I'm tainted now!"

"That's exactly what he wants. Cruelty makes the curse spread. Killing me wasn't what you were afraid of. You're afraid of becoming a monster like me. He reached into your darkest fears and made you believe the one thing that would push you over the edge."

Liana felt hollow. If Isak held her tight enough, she might just shatter like glass. All the people she had killed, it had been a game. Stuck in a nightmare world, in a war, where the only person she had known kindness from was the same man she despised, it had been so easy to rationalize her cruelty. She was once a Priestess of the Spring. And now...

"Well, Narcius won." Tears ran down her face now. "Before this, I killed only to protect myself and others, and never without the goddess' blessing. Look at me now."

She pulled down her shirt, revealing part of her chest. Her skin was as black as ink, as though oil ran through her veins instead of blood.

Isak cursed. He reached down with one hand and pulled her blouse over her head. From her heart, black thorns spread outward, covering part of her breasts, her ribcage.

"I knew I shouldn't have let you leave." He pressed a hand to her skin. The black patches were cold. "But you resented staying with me. So I let you go. I never would have let you free if I knew he could still reach your mind, spread the curse further."

"It doesn't matter anymore," Liana sobbed. "The corruption won't stop. Not after everything I've done. I don't deserve to go back to my family. I have nothing."

Isak wiped away a tear. "So why did you come here? What were you looking for?"

"The truth."

"Even if it causes you pain?"

"Maybe that's what I deserve."

He pressed a finger to her temple. "Do you want to forget? Should I lock away that which pains you?"

"I thought you said you couldn't do that."

He smiled. "Do you think I can't find a way to do it?"

"Even if you did, it wouldn't erase everything I've done."

"You're right. It won't."

"How do you live with yourself? How do you keep going, knowing what you've done to people?"

Isak tilted his head to the side. "You're asking the wrong person. I quite enjoy what I do." He leaned forward, his nose brushing against hers. "I can't heal a broken spirit. Or a broken heart."

"Like I expected you to bother trying." She turned her head to the side, away from his eyes.

"But I can cleanse the darkness."

Liana closed her eyes, not believing him, her body shaking in silent despair. She had already lost her family, her principles, and soon she herself would disappear, turned into a raging monster once the poison in her blood covered her completely. She had nothing left to lose, no shame in letting him hold her close now. Better than being alone, then being cold. Nothing concerned her anymore.

Until Isak's lips pressed gently into the curve of her neck. Liana wriggled, trying to pull back from him. There was no sly smile on his lips this time, no smirk remark.

"You hate me, I know. I like to tease you, pester your family, manipulate information to better suit my wishes, but there are lines even I won't cross without your permission."

Isak's palm was hot, and Liana couldn't help pressing her cheek into that warmth as he tilted her head back.

"Only one of us truly deserves to be corrupted," he said against her lips. "Let me gather up the darkness inside you. Let me fill you will pleasure instead."

Liana could see her frightened expression in his eyes. Her entire body trembled as his offer sank in. Thoughts came to a halt as her heart began hammering in her chest.

"Should I let you go?"

Liana panicked, throwing her arms around his shoulders. The only thing that was keeping her from the numbing freeze was his hot body against her own. "No."

"What do you want then?"

"I don't want to be cold anymore."

He pressed his forehead against hers. Lightning flashed for a moment, and he didn't even blink or flinch from it, eyes as intense as the first day she had met him.

"There is no going back if I cross this line," he warned. "I've spent decades longing for you. If you demand that I leave, I will, but if you give me permission to continue, I won't go back to waiting for the day that you'd be mine."

Liana closed her eyes, and pressed her lips to his. What did it matter if she resisted him anymore? She was going to fade away soon. Her body would still exist, but her mind, her spirit, her consciousness would fade away into nothing but rage and bloodlust. Now was all the time she had, now was all the time that mattered.

He crushed her to him, squeezing her between himself and the glass, waking her heart, bringing heat to her cheeks. His tongue slid over hers, kissing her deep. Electricity zipped along her skin, making her feel as though her limps were turned into putty. When he pulled away, she was breathless.

Yet some part of her mind awoke and rebelled, reminding her of all the times she had resisted his touch in the past. This was not the same boy that she had loved as a child.

"You'll burn me."

"You're right. I will." He leaned in so close, that his chest crushed hers, and his breath puffed against her ear. "I'm not gentle, I'm not soft, and once won't be enough."

His tongue traced the outer rim of her ear. Liana cried out.

"Mmm, what a beautiful sound." Isak slid his leg between hers. "So what will be?"

Liana's mind was dangerously close to shutting down, and letting nothing but touch take over. She had to press a hand to his chest, to ground herself.

"If I change my mind midway through, if I wake up from this dream you put me in-"

"I'll give you a word. Say it and I stop, no matter what I'm doing."

He moved lower, his tongue tracing from her ear to her neck, where he bit down gently, nibbling lightly on her skin. "I need an answer."

"Yes."

"Good."

Isak looped his hands under her thighs, lifting her, positioning her legs around his waist.

"W-wait. Here? Against the glass?"

"Shush." He trailed kisses down to her collarbone, stopping just above her heart. "Relax now. Let me guide you through the fire."

[formayhem]

Thai QL Favorites Tag Game

Tagged by @twig-tea! Thank you!

I've never really talked about my favorite BL/QL ever, and I'm definitely not able to write in depth analysis or think pieces. I do know what I like and appreciate, though. :)

Below the cut I'll say a lot of not profound and probably stupid stuff. Yay. 🥳

Favorite Thai QL:

I Told Sunset About You (special mention to My Only 12%, besides its last episode, and before I finally watched ITSAY)

This really is no surprise, for anyone that may have encountered my posts here and there. My journey in BL is still ongoing, but I watched this one early this year, after spending half a year during 2022 writing it off. In my defense, I wasn't on BL Tumblr back then, and I just took one look at the trailer, and said, "no".

Then ITSAY came to Viki. I distinctly recall texting my friend that I was starting it, telling them I hoped there was something in it for me because it "didn't look like what I like" (I had no idea what I liked in QL series for way too long).

ITSAY wrecked me and surprised me. My viewing was a visceral one that completely and irrevocable transplanted me back into my own youth, causing me to relive falling in love with my best friend in middle school/freshman year, our summers of a love so consequential that I'd think of it in 2023, while watching a series, crying on my couch, and resonating entirely with two boys I'll probably never forget about, either.

Funny how I almost never watched Teh and Oh-aew, because then what series would I write love letters in my head about? It's beautiful to look at, to watch unfold, to listen to, to hear, and to feel.

Favorite Pairing:

Pete & Kao. I think this pairing may always kind of be my favorite for sentimental reasons. And no one wants to read that novel.

Favorite Pairing That Never Came to Pass? Oh, you didn't ask? Well,

Kim & Way from The Shipper because I was so invested in what they had going on, and I will remain forever sad that That's It (even though I sincerely appreciate a bittersweet ending).

Most underrated actor:

Up until recently, I would have said Suar because his work in You're My Sky wounded me. Except La Pluie has happened now, and people really adored his character there.

I also would have said Gawin, but now we have Be My Favorite (which I have yet to start)...

Maybe Fluke Pusit. He's in a lot, but I'd like to see him take a lead in a QL. I just think he has the range, okay. I want to see it.

Favorite Character:

(a 2 part and this will be a trend, clearly)

Teh from ITSAY

Because I am a Teh, through and through. I love how deeply he loves, how brash and thoughtless he is while thinking so deeply almost ALL of the time that he is literally frozen in fear of his present and future. This character is for all the idiots out there with bleeding hearts and who want to make everyone happy and forget what being happy themselves feels like. Cheers.

Mork from My Ride

Mork is just so sincerely GOOD. From the first episode, I admired this character and the warmth and kindness he exhibits. He is just everything decent and sweet in the world, okay?

Favorite Side Character:

Instantly I will say MAE from 3 Will Be Free. I wanted so much more of her story and her time with Tur, and I want to see her HAPPY. I want to see her okay.

And then the 2-part (3, 4 part.. ) not asked for:

I really like all of Mark's side characters (Jedi especially). I like Chot from Step by Step so so very much. I love Cheep and Dej, the uncles from My Ride, and I want to know everything about them.

Favorite Scene in a QL:

I refuse to list an ITSAY scene again (but pretend I have listed every single scene from the series, because I have, mentally).

So, I'll say from You're My Sky, when Vee and Dome sit next to each other, and we get the moving closer, wanting to touch, knowing they shouldn't, to fingers brushing, to pinky holding, all framed from behind, without their faces and so full of ALL the feelings.

Also basically every night scene that exists in Moonlight Chicken, especially thst first drunken night:

And I lied, I will mention ITSAY: Teh and Oh on the floor, under the stairs, and floating on the water. The red bra scene.

The first two scenes have me in a chokehold for their depiction of desire and longing and confusion and shame, the wanting, the running. The floating scene has me in a chokehold because I love how much deeper their conversation in the surface is, when I became more than a casual listener and heard it. I love that it's about their feelings and how they handle them, and the first time I listened, I just really thought they liked floating and sinking, okay? And Oh-aew and the red bra is another 10 paragraphs no one asked for.

It's actually a goal/plan to go back and view my 5 & 4 star rated series because I have the memory of a goldfish and can't SOURCE MY FACTS OR FEELINGS, but it's all really real, and I know I'm overlooking everything and just listing basic memories here. Ugh.

Favorite Line in a QL:

That's sooooooooooo impossible!!!!

Pat's "it was so depressingly lonely for me" in Bad Buddy.

"Time flies, right?"/"It flies too fast for me to follow." SOTUS S

"You think you're sending out a certain frequency no one hears like that whale. But I hear you." 180 Degree Longitude Passes Through Us

"In that moment, I realize if he's the bravery, I must be the fear." Not Me

and on and on and on, and this is Thai only, but there's also like 20 sad Korean/Tai quotes in my brain because I like SAD quotes.

oh, and shout out to Fluke as Army screaming "what the fuck" on loop in my head from The Warp Effect.

Most Anticipated QL (& why):

I think we are all very excited about Only Friends because it's going to look outstanding and be fun, and it's got an amazing cast. I'm most excited for Neo and Mark. And the wardrobes for every character.

Outside of OF, I'm excited for After Sundown, just for the supernatural/horror aspect and because it looked pretty in the trailer. I'm just mehhh on the actual pairing of the film.

annnnnnd Cherry Magic just because I have a Tay Tawan soft spot forever. 😅 I don't actually keep up with what's "coming soon" in BL/QL, so I'm sure there are amazing things in the works that I'm unaware of.

Healthiest relationship in a QL:

Wait, you guys watch healthy relationships??

Kidding... Heck, I don't know. I personally want whatever the gay uncles in My Ride have. And I am realizing the next series I need to watch is UWMA because it keeps being mentioned...

Most toxic relationship in a QL:

VegasPete and TharnType (although I guess one could argue they were both into how unhealthy it was, but not for my viewing pleasure)

Guilty pleasure series:

SOTUS. It was my first BL series back in 2018, and I feel like I've seen so much better series and films since then, but I get stupid comfort out of this show.

Also, Enchanté seems like a guilty pleasure because so many people dislike it, and I don't feel so strongly. I like to play it and make memes of every side eye and disgusted look Akk gives.

Most underrated series:

I still will say You're My Sky, even after seeing He's Coming to Me. Hell, I will say both of them, but for entirely different experiences.

They both are entirely made up of basically everything that almost all of my favs share, and they're sprinkled with helpings of what I look for in series now and going forward.

Personally, I want to say all of my Top Ten Loves are underrated, just so I can have more people to talk about them with. 😤

Thanks for reading!

[golbrockstar]

As we are now in the last month of the year, it's time to do a year roundup I think? (if you are willing) Of all their channels which is just their main one and reacts I guess.

Best Sam and Colby video of the year?

Worst Sam and Colby video of the year?

Saddest/most emotional Sam and Colby video of the year?

Happiest Sam and Colby video of the year?

Funniest Sam and Colby video of the year?

And what do we all hope for, with the upcoming year? (Like what do you want to see more or less of?)

(I sent this to a couple SnC blogs cos I'm super interested to see what peoples answers are)

I love this idea!

I actually had to go back and look at what they posted this year cause I forgot nearly everything besides the conjuring lmao. Anyway, I don't really watch the React channel (not my kind of content), so we're sticking to the good old Sam and Colby channel.

These are all my opinions and not really based on the stats of any video.

Best Sam and Colby video of the year: You know, a lot of my favorite SnC videos are actually from last year, not a lot of heavy hitters this year for me, but I mean Colby was battling cancer for much of this year so its completely understandable.

That being said, Hellfire Club was really fun for me and is probably the one I enjoyed the most. I also really liked the last video of the conjuring series. It was just really intense and it was the first time I was actively shouting at my screen in a while.

Worst Sam and Colby video of the year: I'd say the 3 Hotels in 50 Hours was my least favorite. I didn't rewatch it for this, but I remember just being very underwhelmed with it. Not much happened, and it felt like they were trying to squeeze in too much too fast.

The saddest/most emotional Sam and Colby video of the year: It's definitely the cancer video, for sure. You can't watch that and not get at least a little bit emotional.

As far as regular content, that conjuring video where Sam cries is really emotional. Like you hardly see the guys get that effected by something and seeing Sam really break down and cry was just gut wrenching.

Happiest Sam and Colby video of the year: I'm gonna throw the cancer video here to because it ends on a really high note and made me smile a lot seeing how much support Colby got from his friends and how happy they were at the end of it.

Funniest Sam and Colby video of the year: Gonna give this one to the video with tommyinnit and Jack Manifold just because that dynamic was hilarious. Like those streamers have a level of chaotic energy that is so different from SnC's that it's just funny to see how they react.

I'm a bit of a fan of Tommy outside of this video so I didn't find him as annoying as I know he came across for some of the other SnC fans, but I can't say I'd want them to collab again lmao.

What am I hoping for?: Honestly? For both of the boys to be happy, healthy, and at peace with themselves. This year has been a struggle for them both and I hope 2024 brings them that sense of normalcy this year has lacked for them.

Content-wise, though, I'd like less collabs and more solo SnC because they never do that anymore. Now that they're officially done with the conjuring house, I'd like for them to stay away from the "demon-infested" places for a while and just stick to the average ghost stories. I like when they go to lesser-known places as well and tell their stories.

I'd also like them to do more post-research as well. Like if they get a name from a piece of equipment that doesn't line up with someone they'd heard about, research that name in connection with the place they're at. It may turn up nothing, but you never know.

It's nice that they try to connect the dots in the moment, but I think them going back and connecting dots after the fact would be a better way to make connections.

[goldeneyedgirl]

Your babyverse lives rent free in my head. Since your last snippet I only think about Alice and Jasper living in a cozy house with baby Ollie. Alice picking him up at school and Jasper helping him to write his name and his parents names in that cute childish handwriting. All healthy and happy and loving each other forever and a day. And the way Jasper thinks about Ollie as "his boy" 😭😭😭 Sorry about it, you created a monster when you gave me that fic

I still think it's funny you guys love this fic so much. Especially the version I posted when there are six existing variations of how all this went down.

I think my favourite aspect is writing how fatherhood has shaped everyone - as a fandom, there's a lot of discourse on womanhood, feminism, and motherhood because of how emphasized it is in the books, but I haven't seen a lot on fatherhood outside of Carlisle, and Carlisle and Edward's relationship (doesn't mean it isn't out there, it just hasn't come across my dash). But I could waffle on about that for ages; I won't.

I live for the little moments like Jasper getting to introduce Ollie to Peter and Charlotte, and Peter kind of gets this moment of ... closure, almost? That after every single thing that Jasper has gone through and deals with, he's here with a girl who loves him, and their son. And Jasper might be terrified of fucking parenthood up or that Ollie might get sick or hurt, but he's also so, so happy.

Or Alice mathematically working out where Jasper can stand at the local fair so that he can watch Ollie ride a pony for the first time without scaring the poor animal to death because that's one of the memories that Jasper's managed to hold onto all this time - the joy he had around horses when he was a child, and learning to ride.

And then there's all the drama and bullshit - the Volturi, Maria just being extra, Whatever The Fuck Alice and Cynthia's Mother is up to, Ollie having to pretend Alice and Jasper are his cousins when he's too old to look like their son. But that's what makes the happy moments more special.

Have a snippet from an Ollie piece I started before I wrote the 'Daddy' piece. Jasper's a good dad.

In a million years, Jasper never would have guessed he’d end up in this position. 

It’s just before six am and the house is quiet, finally. Ollie’s head was against his shoulder, still sniffling around his pacifier as Jasper began the process to make his bottle. Alice and Esme had made up a guide for making Ollie’s bottles to make sure he could feed his son without the risk of burning him, involving three different thermometers and a chart of acceptable temperatures. 

He really did prefer when Alice pumped; mixing formula still made him nervous. 

Ollie let out a huff of annoyance, but didn’t cry. And he’d been crying since midnight, when he’d woken up and hadn’t been at home. 

Alice had dropped him off late the night before, masked up and looking exhausted. 

“Cynthia and I both tested positive for strep,” she had explained hoarsely. “I really don’t want Ollie to catch it - can you…?”

He’d taken his sleepy son immediately, and reassured Alice Ollie would be fine; Esme kept the house well stocked for when Alice brought Ollie over. 

[theauburnfox]

So, I finally saw eeaao and this film litteraly changed me. like, I can't believe I cried like I did to a movie where there are so many funny and ironic moments but isn't that what life is about. You live your live, and sometimes you laugh, others you cry, sometimes you do both, sometimes you don't feel nothing, other times you feel too much and life goes on.

It really is incredible the way that we understand that even it is ridiculous that truly nothing matters, we also must understand with kindness that everything matters. In a way, we must understand that we don't fail at anything and there's is always some sort of potencial we can achieve, but also the thing we really need to achieve is to care about people and let others care about you. We don't need to see one or the other side, we need to see both and much more.

I am truly a mess after watching this, feeling like I lost of piece of myself that needed to be traded for something more and I haven't felt that way about a movie in so long. Yes some other recent movies created emotions in me, made me think about life, but this one really gave me all and much more.

Also, the acting and perfomances were superb!! The action scenes incredible that complemented the amazing storytelling. Great cinematography and something curious... Our generation these days needs more and more stimulus to sometimes pay attention and this film pays attention to it flawlessly in a way that makes sense to the story (special mention to every outfit Joy had and congrats to the team behind it).

So yeah. This was a lot. But I needed to vent. Probably will come back to post here, since I feel inspired. Hope it lasts!!

If someone read this long text I leave you with a gif that is my favourite shot of the movie. It is the calm before the chaos, but at the same time you can feel the the chaos will lead to calm again. I completly adore it.

Sending everyone love 🦊💖

[highwaydiamonds]

@mountainmaven tagged me for this lil question set- Thanks Kim!💖

1. Are you named after anyone? Ehhhh technically my mother chose my first name from Meggie in The Thorn Birds (though with a different spelling of Meghann. I'm Megan, and I generally dislike being called Meggie... It's p rare that I respond to being called that.)

2. When was the last time you cried? ... Yesterday? I almost cried today from reading a post someone made, but not full crying. That happened yesterday. I am a very easy crier.

3. Do you use sarcasm? Who? Me?!... Please. Of course I do. Far more than I ought to at that. It's the flip side to my insecurity probably -an abundance of snark.

4. What's the first thing you notice about people? That really depends on how I meet or come across those people. In person - probably eyes and the way people watch/listen- I'm likely looking to see how people might be judging me ( or more specifically my body.) Online - if people are funny or engaging. Are you thoughtful - it's a place where you CAN lead with your thoughts first - so does someone? or do they take the LCD and run with it ( AKA be a total troll or send a dick pic - that sort of thing. UGH to both)

5. What's your eye color? Something somewhat indeterminate? Meh I usually say gray-green. It's a mix of my dad's gray-blue and my mom's green gold hazel. the gray and green got mish-mashed together and there's a tiny tiny gold rim right around the pupil. idk man. my eyes are very color. (like the creature is very shape.)

6. Scary movie or happy ending? Considering that i am very easy to scare - i have made myself jump by forgetting a stationary object was on a table and then when i saw it there i was so surprised i jumped- i rarely go for scary movies. Happy ending please... (i am working SO much not to make jokes with that. I deserve a treat now.)

7. Any special talents? Clearly. I am talented at not allowing myself to make dirty jokes (see above question's response.) Other than that, I don't think so? I don't want to make self deprecating remarks (wow I am just avoiding all the jokes tonight, right?!) - I think there are things I do well, but I wouldn't necessarily call them special talents. I cannot belly dance, strike an apple sitting on your head with an arrow, or put a knot in a cherry stem with my tongue. Your girl has no party pieces. (and if I *were* making bad jokes - here is where I woul say, " I AM the party piece." But that would be a lie. I don't like parties very much XD )

8. Where were you born? In a hospital. That's what this question was looking for, right? (confused? see the answer above re sarcasm.)

9. What are your hobbies? art journaling, knitting, reading, occasionally baking, watching tv and movies more than i ought to, playing with makeup (not good at it but i like it) - and when the finances are they darling - shopping for cute things (which might pertain to the above or might just generally be sparkly and/or adorable.

10. Do you have any pets? Not that are mine personally right now B UT the house I am living in her several. There are two dogs that are permanent residents ( Peat and Lily - border terrier siblings that are like 15 years old I think. Two dogs that live here part time - Nova and bailey - who are probably 4 and 11 respectively. Then three parrots (two greater mccaws of differing kinds - Mello and Maddie, and one lesser Mccaw - uh i think anyway- and that's Emma Peel - yes named for the avengers tv character). And two bearded dragons ( differing kinds) - Fred and Apollo. There will also be a puppy joining the household in probably a month or less - one of the people in the house is getting a Lakenois puppy out of a litter so there will be that. I'll enjoy there being a puppy around but gotta say i have learned things about myself living with this many animals. (namely that I do not want to be responsible for this many animals. especially squawky birds. good for you if you do.)

11. What sports do you play/have played? i don't play any now .. but seriously i was never sporty really. I played volleyball and softball when in middle school but does that even count? i like swimming but i was never going to be competitive at it when i was young. i was short and round not lean and long - so that was not gonna happen for me

12. How tall are you? 5'4" (slightly under it but close enough)

13. What was your favorite subject in school? I liked school pretty well generally - most of it was good - I didn't always like what we had to read but I liked English (aka Lit classes), History ( or government) , and some science courses (bio, advanced bio, physics) <-- in high school. Beyond that - ART HISTORY ( i should have found a way to major in it - or at least minor in it. I liked it better than either of my actual majors - and more than some of grad school classes too. seriously art history is way more fun than talking about budgeting in public administration. )

14. Dream job? The best answer to this is one I am stealing from a post here on tumblr or on twitter (idk) and that is, " I simply do not dream of labor." Seriously,I'm not sure any more. I think being a museum curator could be amazing, or like a special collections librarian ( if you dig the collection)... But I also think something where I could make a difference and change health policy in this country would be great - I'm not sure just what that would be or mean. I can't sew at all but i think being a fashion designer and making floofy dresses for myself would be cool. Fairy Princess- there we go - that's the job for me.

As to tagging... I never know who likes to be tagged and who doesn't. So @seashells-and-bookshelves , @librarianlirael , @ndb-123 , @i-blame-this-on-sherlock , @freckles-and-books , and seriously anybody that wants to. I like reading your answers- so take these and run with em- and tag me (so's i can read em) if you do.

[enderspawn]

theres this fic idea i’ve been thinking of for a long while now (honestly i've had this specific post drafted since may of this year, so maybe since january or so) and want to eventually write one day, but if im being honesty with myself i'm not sure if i ever will, so im at least putting it out there now.

its a chip analysis piece (likely in some kind of 5+1 format, primarily from jay’s POV) specifically between chip and his relationship with food. the simple fact he’s always been this scrawny malnourished street kid when growing up outside of the black rose means a lot to me, and it would likely cause a lot of habits or behaviors the others wouldnt have or possibly even understand to begin with which would be a fun thing to explore and how it can reveal more abt him.

scenes/topics that would be Covered will be under cut

1 ---

the first thing that immediately comes to mind is an analysis and expansion upon his canon interactions with food in canon, such as the bag of chip’s jay gives him on loffinlot or the cinnamon roll incident

for one, the fact that jay carries snacks at all is kind of indicative and would likely be the focus. use jay's pov to explain how she’s learned to bring snacks on adventures since teaming with chip (likely with comments being somewhat snide or huffy about it, or comparing him to a child demanding/needing a snack, since they are still kind of strangers and she doesn’t know much about chip).

(if desired, it could also expand on how he fuckin’ made that small bag of chips last so long. yes the true answer is “because it was funny” but like… rationing behavior? jay might make an absent note of it (due to her observant feat), but wouldn’t likely extrapolate further at the time. also may be cut entirely for messing with story flow too much to include as a detail.)

the cinnamon roll scene is… listen he literally tried to share food with someone and broke down crying doing so because he loves them and wants to share that. obvious example of using food as a language for love and appreciation (which, again, takes on another level when you remember he comes from a food-scarce background). like thats just a thing that happened i don’t care if it was a goof that’s just canon. bite me. 

2 ---

observation of chip having "weird" behaviors with food. these include having a seemingly massive appetite and being sure to always clean his plate (you don’t turn down access to food and you take what you can in case you can’t do it again soon.) 

but also: as part of chip kind of projecting onto ollie, he’s always trying to pawn more food onto ollie’s plate. sometimes it’s as subtle as saying he’s “not hungry anymore” and scrapping whats left to ollie (which would catch jay’s eye because previously he’s always finished his plate even when full and clues her in) to as obvious as literally giving him more and saying he needs to eat more.

both the above points would be stuff jay would 1. spot and 2. actually take note of/care about, around after desire island or so. 

3 ---

immediately after leaving allport, i think seeing reuben would bring back a bunch of chip's old habits and cause him to backslide a bit. after all, even if they were a “family”, they were also still a gang of street rats. on instinct, he would end up showing a lot of food guarding habits (being overly protective of people taking it, hiding food in a stash, etc). he likely also had these habits for a while after joining with jay and gillion, but after episode 16 when they started slowly getting closer the habits faded because he knew he could trust them. 

4 ---

this is such a minor point in comparison to the rest of this list but i can see it so clearly in my brain. chip has an apple (likely stolen tbh) and he takes a bite out of it and leans against a wall. jay either makes a snide comment towards him about it or just snorts or something, prompting chip to hold it up towards her and go “you want some?” in a snarky way (speaking with his mouth full all the while).

jay rolls her eyes and says yes and gets startled when chip actually throws her the apple. she yelps, catching it, then throws it back immediately while yelling something like “ew, no, you took a bite of it already! i was kidding! gross!” chip feigns being wounded and retorts with something like “and here i was willing to expose myself to your stink getting on my apple–” and cue bickering between them about cooties. 

he just straight up was willing to share the apple, thoughts abt "the fact he already bit into it" don’t register for him bc its such a non-issue in his mind. he offers to share about any food he has/makes because its a silent way to show he cares. i don’t think he’s fully conscious of that fact though. in general i think chip responds a lot better to subtle actions showing love than words of love and this is just another example of that from him

(following this is likely where cinnamon roll scene would go in the fic, both timeline-wise and thematically, since this section is focused more or less on "sharing your food as a sign of love")

5 ---

this next section would be the most plot heavy or traditional “fic” affair, in that it’s not solely fluff padding/analysis and has some original storybits.

the crew would be stranded on an island. i don’t know how exactly, but the key parts is that they don’t have their ship, there’s no one else on the island, and they have limited resources/rations. presumably they know rescue is coming, but ideally they don’t know exactly when (for drama purposes, as well as to make proper rationing out supplies p much impossible). perhaps the grandberry crew is on their way to save them, but they ended up on this island after a storm and don’t know where they are to point the grandberry pirates to. something like that.

actually, this plays out very similarly to the ollie part as detailed earlier, but to the left. as the crew starts to struggle with rations, chip would start (subtly when possible) start giving up his own portions. either by feigning lack of appetite, persuasion, deception, etc. the closest he comes to stating the truth would be when someone (likely ollie) asks if he’ll be okay going without his portion and chip shrugs then leans back on his elbows with a smirk and goes “nah, i’m used to it anyway.”

this is when the rest of the crew also starts to pick up on chip’s behaviors, to the point it becomes a bit of an unspoken secret they don’t want to dig into. previously, and the reason the entire fic is from Jay's POV, shes been the only one observant enough to take notice off all these traits. this is when it becomes So obvious everyone notices it.

6 ---

preferably, near the beginning of the story (likely after the chip bag incident, but before jay starts noticing all of chip’s behaviors, so that she cares for him more than she’s annoyed by him but hasn't put together any real dots-- between section 1 and 2), there would be a section where chip is mocked for his short height (as the shortest of the crew, at around 5’4) and being VERY easy for gillion to carry. 

then, after the island section (section 5), there would be another part where chip’s height and weight are commented on. i'm undecided if this would be another light hearted goof scene or a more “dramatic” serious scene (which if it was it would likely be tied to the island incident. maybe an injury or argument or something?).

either way, it happens because jay ends up lifting/carrying chip. jay “8 in strength” ferin. he’s just fuckin light. afterwards, chip would explain saying something like “its not my fault! cause like– outside of arlin, i was kind of a street rat growing up, yknow? they arent particularly known for having a stable food situation, didn’t get all the nutrients and junk you need to grow tall”. it starts as a joke and a kind of light-hearted ribbing defense, but kind of sobers up in that melancholic-nostalgic way by the end.

it’s the first time he directly states anything abt his upbringing and food to his crew, but its a confirmation. well, its a confirmation for jay. everyone else definitely knew something was going on, but jay is the one who is able to connect all the pieces bc she’s the only one whos noticed all the other pieces. she gets the Whole Picture of how his childhood and upbringing caused all these behaviors and kind of what they imply abt chip's behavior now (like the food sharing as love, smothering ollie, etc)

+ 1 ---

for a cheesy ending bonus, have jay use a mix of chip’s anecdotes abt the black rose and drey’s shaky memory to try and cook up a meal he used to have there. (for bonus, if desired she could reach out to lizzie too since lizzie lived with the old chef shay).

depending on author preference, either its good and chip cries because of the ~*memories*~ and the fact they cared enough, or it’s comically awful and not much at all like the original but the sole fact that they went out of their way to very obviously try SO hard to surprise him with this because they thought it would make him happy (as well as trying to speak to him in his own love language) makes him cry about it anyway. 

(again, chip responds better to acts of love than words-- having his crew not only notice this abt him, but then do something to try and show that love hits him way harder than anything else could)

[raytorosaurus]

hi nic nj hardcore scene historian. could i ask for some essential podcasts of thursday/geoff <3 if you have the time ofc :-)

YES OFC okay i need to warn you that this shit is Potent. you will fall in love and it will get to a point where you need a certain amount of food water geoff podcast just to get you through the day. if you search "geoff rickly" on spotify and sort podcasts i can genuinely say every single one of them is worth a listen. but here are a couple that are a good starting place, from memory:

going off track (october 2012): this one's a classic because it's the first time he appeared on steven smith's (yes, of untitled rock show fame) podcast - he's been on it a couple of times and every one is great but this one covers a good deal of interesting information about the jersey hardcore scene geoff was really involved in (which is really cool to learn about as a my chem fan too!) and the vibes are good bc they all go way back (one of the co-hosts, jonah bayer, is in another grindcore/punk band with geoff)

sappenin' (october 2019): again, vibes are great with these hosts because they've been friends for ages. i'm not sure exactly how in-depth they explain it but geoff went through some real shit in 2014-16 and some of that's referenced in here. two pieces of context just in case: they talk a bit about the band geoff formed with the ex-members of l*stprophets after that lead singer went to jail for some fucked up stuff (major csa warning if you google), and also about the music label geoff created in an attempt to prove that it was possible to run an ethical, artist-first label, which...imploded quite dramatically and publicly because he trusted the wrong investor lol.

cautionary tales (january 2018): the vibes of this one aren't as laid-back and fun but it is very interesting and informative about, like, scene history and politics as it relates to both thursday and my chem

lead singer syndrome (feb 2021): geoff has earned his poor little meow meow title more than anyone else. they talk quite a bit about all the label bullshit thursday/geoff went through in this one

shallow rewards dream life of emo part 1 and 2 (sept 2016): again this one's really interesting in terms of emo/post-hardcore history and situating both thursday and my chem in that, fairly succinct too

and last but not least it's worth mentioning that geoff has his own short podcast on spotify (under geoffrey rickly) about mental health in the arts industry, and this episode specifically features steve from thursday and norm brannon (who is also currently touring with thursday) and they discuss homophobia and being closeted as a touring artist in the scene (nothing graphic or too upsetting, but definitely worth a listen).

okay that's already quite a lot of podcast lol but like i said. you can't go wrong. some of the guys, especially tucker and steve, have done some good ones too which are funny to listen to after geoff podcasts bc both those guys are like eighty times less dramatic than geoff in general lmao. also shout-out to this one by stu, thursday's current touring bassist (and geoff's no devotion bandmate), because he does talk quite a bit about geoff in it, but also because it's just like. a really good listen. they talk about some pretty confronting stuff regarding the l*stprophets situation, im not exaggerating when i say this episode made me laugh out loud and cry in my car within like the same ten minutes.

anyway. have fun good luck not falling deeply deeply into parasocials with geoff after these lol ✌️ and just in general, to mcr fans, i honestly think getting to know a little bit of this kind of stuff can really enhance your enjoyment and appreciation of my chem as well!