#possible underuse of commas | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

joytraveler · 2 years ago

Text

13. Space Paladin

Space Paladin begins with fast paced rock and a montage of the hero suiting up, with their gold and white power armor they're quite imposing as they jet off towards what will be the first stage!

"SPACE GHOST!"

A side-scrolling shooter similar to Gradius, though made a bit easier by your ability to deflect shots with your sword and knock them into enemies.

HNV: Ooh, superheroes in space, an underused video game archetype! DueyDecimal: I believe this is more like a KNIGHT in space! Syrupentine: I hope it's not the kind that can only move in an L shape

You can even knock enemies into each other for extra damage! Because of this, you have to time your attacks right and being aggressive usually yields you only a swift demise.

aroseahorseboy: ping pong those meteor monsters! aroseahorseboy: whoa they knock each other back at you too, that's not fair

"Space Knight is really kind of Space Pong but you know what, I get to put on a fancy robot suit and go out in the universe, and that's what I- WHOAH!! Slow up there, Dragonfart!"

The first boss rushes past from the back of the screen, a mechanical dragon that flaps up and down quickly, spitting homing fireballs. "Oh he's cool looking! I hate him also, he's hard, ow!"

Klickitat_Street: Hey, she’s just trying to defend her family! Look at all the eggs you destroyed on the way! Syrupentine: I wouldn’t want to lay meteors. :( HNV: That would probably give you hemorrhoids... Klickitat_Street: Or assteroids. :P Baconnaise: Bea is it okay if you have two less fans soon

She also discovers she can charge up her slash attack. This lets her create a shockwave when she swing, and lets her knock back projectiles twice as fast!

"He's like, 'You know as a knight I was really worried I wouldn't find a dragon in space and I'd just have to settle for slaying a space manticore or something.' "

"And the dragon's like 'Ahh no lousy stinkin' knights up here in the black reaches of- D'OH!!' "

Her final blow chops its head clean off.. and then the head flies away, apparently cackling! "Hey, I'm going to put you on the hood of my car next time I see you!"

aroseahorseboy: you thought you could hoard all the space damsels and astro-gold you wanted? aroseahorseboy: THINK SPACE-AGAIN DueyDecimal: I love when ‘space’ is used as a prefix in the future! HNV: That’s mostly the fault of dictation soft where failures comma Dewey. Glockroach: So is he dead or is he gonna show up later attached to a battleship or a dump truck or something

"I mean, he's bound to show up later, I kind of like when games get a rivalry going between- oh.." The next stage has begun without warning. This time you're flying through a long tunnel lined with statues that appear to be other Space Paladins? The music is much more soft and somber, and Bea finds herself being attacked by ghostly warriors.

"Whoah, the Hall of Ancestors? And none of them are happy to see me, it seems! 'I remember youuu.. I gave you twenty bucks and you never gave it back and then I DIED!' And my guy's just like 'but you're dead now you'll never need it' and they're like 'nope, nope, don't care, we're haunting you, we called up all them dead relatives and we're gonna use 'em' "

berd_snurglar: hey, harsh but fair DueyDecimal: The makers of this game were definitely going with the super overblown portrayal of paladins, huh! With the deep religious themes and asking for spiritual guidance and stuff Meanwhile in every game I run, the Paladin ends up being “The Terminator, except he can turn water into wine“

The vengeful ghosts really test Bea’s ability to reflect shots, and she finds herself using her special spin move more to clear the screen of projectiles than to attack!

A giant knight statue kneels at the end of the stage. There's a bit of dialogue here! Unfortunately none of the text is legible, it's like an alien language. "Huh. Anyone got the secret decoder ring or possibly Google Translate"

Glockroach: It says ''''''''''''''''''' '''''''''' '''''''''''''''''''''''''' '''' ''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''' Syrupentine: Oh, it’s Woodstock! berd_snurglar: dude got big and joined the space guild I guess wait is the statue also talking or is it knightdude just introspecting

Bea is then presented with a choice- two options, but both in the same abstract "language".

"Uuuuhhhhhhh... Guess we'll do a vote? How many for nonsense A vs. nonsense B?"

DueyDecimal: OK, hang on, maybe it’s a cryptogram? Can we figure out which of these characters is the ‘E’ and work it out from there? aroseahorseboy: that would be the one that looks like ‘ Baconnaise: you are already nonsense, Bea HNV: What was the name of this show again? Syrupentine: i just call it Bea Time Oh jeez duh. PRESS BEA!

"First option is usually 'Yes' with these things, but what am I agreeing to here?" She flips back and forth, moaning and groaning before she makes her choice.

Instantly, the statue's eyes light up and it rises to its feet, pulling a giant sword down from offscreen. "Y'okay, I clearly just agreed to take a look at your cool sword! Done, let's go! Bye!"

HNV: I’m going to assume that he offered to rule the universe with you as father and son and you just said no? snerd_buglar: 'look around lad, all this could be yours' 'what the statues?' 'no not the statues lad!'

This battle feels more dire because there’s no projectiles to reflect, just clashing swords as Bea flies through the endless tunnel of moaning ghosts! Bea still has her own shots, but can’t seem to land a hit on the giant statue with them, it’s even better at blocking than she is!

"I really don't know what to do, nothing seems to get through!" After several minutes of clashing blades, Bea's getting ready to give up, until she realizes she's no longer in control. The warriors have lowered their weapons. Then, they clasp each others hands, and shake.

"Oh."

Syrupentine: Oh. berd_snurglar: oh. Bee52: oh Llord_Kuruku: Oh...

The screen slowly fades to black, but as it does, some sort of energy appears to flow between the giant knight and their smaller successor..

"See I knew I was worthy of the...thing, you guys all worried for nothing!"

DueyDecimal: Why is everyone saying “Oh?” Oh. HNV: The only thing I was worried for nothing about was that Screen 2 wouldn’t match how crazy Screen 1 was...

Screen 3 opens with a legion of ships flying by in the background, over an Earth-like planet. A single while pixel can be seen darting between them- and several are split clean in half! The pixel then flies directly into the camera, and we see it's our knight again! The stage truly begins as they fly low over what looks to be the mothership, touching down to run along its surface.

"Oh dang, a run-em-up now? Okay! Gravity shmavity, it looks cool as hell"

berd_snurglar: this is kind of like someone make an NES lords of thunder and i'm diggin it Llord_Kuruku: I’m starting to to dig this game for real, it’s got a really epic sense of scale

"Yeah me too, Kuru. Wish I knew just what was going on but that's kind of part of the fun I guess!"

HNV: That’s part of the appeal of all of these games, isn’t it? There’s something under the surface, even with the bad and unplayable ones!

Bea can't fly here but she can jump, and she has to to clear some of the turrets and missiles that fly by. "Just, just chop it up already, what's the hold up?"

TaichouSenseiKun: Drama!

She doesn't need to fight much until the miniboss appears, a robotic manticore with an unpleasantly human face-plate and literal stinger missiles!

DueyDecimal: DUDE! Bee52: this is the Monster Manual in space!! berd_snurglar: dewey did you make this one DueyDecimal: Did I?? We’ll see if you have to fight a mechanical hook horror next! HNV: A Robotyugh aroseahorseboy: CPU flayer

This stage is basically a gauntlet of minibosses. After the manticore comes a somewhat underwhelming robo griffin, but its more than made up for by the robo beholder!

Glockroach: B-H0LD R DueyDecimal: This isn’t just a game I’d make, this is what I see when I close my eyes

Approaching the bridge at last, there is no crew visible beyond the windows. Only a glass dome containing the head of the dragon from stage 1. It seems to cackle before turning as much firepower on Bea as possible!

Syrupentine: He’s back!! I love this dragon HNV: Do we get to name him or is that only for heroes Glockroach: Called it btw Llord_Kuruku: Congratulations! You won Space Paladin.

This last boss battle puts Bea’s reflection skills to the test. Some projectiles must be batted back, while new ring-shaped ones must be caught on an outstretched sword and then matched with an opposing color before launching them back to crack the dragon’s dome!

And that's only the first phase- as the battleship itself is finally destroyed, the bridge detaches to become a huge chimera, the dragon head topping off its tail!

"Aaaaahhh.... I did- NOOOOOOOOOOO!!!! ARE YOU KIDDING?"

aroseahorseboy: frippin dang dude! DueyDecimal: This game is grueling but at least it keeps rewarding you with new stuff! Bee52: yeah but come on! that was like kids making up rules in a pretend game! Bee52: POW I got you! Yeah, but, um, my head flies away and gets a new body and also it’s got more heads this time!

"Nu-uh, I got invisibility which not only makes me invisible but if you hit me your arm just goes through anyway! And also the floor is lava and I have the lava boots but you don't"

Syrupentine: MOOOOM, BEA'S CHEATING

She can only get a few hits in, but that's all that's needed with her newly empowered sword! "Ahaaaa, eat a big pile of fu- WHAT???"

The last phase seems to be just the dragon head flying about, and she's too distracted by the chat to dodge in time!

She glares at the screen, slowly turning to the chat window. "YOU!!!!" "No big deal, we can always just.. just.. Game over?! What???" Bea squints at the screen. "They give you ONE life to do all that??"

TaichouSenseiKun: one life to live Klickitat_Street: Well now I'm just amazed at Bea's gaming prowness. All that on one life! Syrupentine: "Prowess" TaichouSenseiKun: Prowness: having qualities resembling the prow of a ship Klickitat_Street: ...I was so ready to come back at you with the dictionary, but no, it is prowess. Everyone's been laughing at me behind my back when I say 'prowness', haven't they. -_-; aroseahorseboy: no you're just in smart company, in real life people probably don't know the word

"Well in spite of how awesome I am, I dunno if I can do that all again, not right now. We'll come back to this one, I have a score to settle!"

aroseahorseboy: any robot dragon that thinks it can mess with Bea has got another think coming probably at least two more thinks since it seems to have several heads

#jtnuggets #jan 19 #bea #hnv #dueydecimal #syrupentine #aroseahorseboy #klickitat street #baconnaise #glockroach #berd #bee 52 #taichousenseikun #llord kuruku

0 notes

roleplay-lanay · 7 years ago

Text

Crazy, Stupid, Love

Chapter 1: Time’s up

***A/n : This is my first rodeo, friends. I would appreciate constructive comments for the betterment of future chapters. I just recently started a marvel marathon to prepare for Black Panther and Infinity War. And I realized how much I like Loki and started thinking of a scenario, however perverted. But I decided to write it down and share it with you lovely people. I hope you enjoy!!!***

Chapter 2 - Chapter 3 - Chapter 4

I was standing in front of the glass cage, looking in on him with a blank expression. He sat with his legs crossed and his hands resting on his knees. His back was straight, and his dark hair fell almost wildly at his shoulders. His eyes were closed and his face expressionless, but with every minute I remained standing there in the silence, he grew more irritated. With a huff, he opened his eyes, "What in Odin's name are you here for?"

At this, I smirked and moved closer to the glass, "I'm here to make you a proposition."

He remained silent, as his emotionless eyes watched, uninterested. I sigh and continue, "I mean to break you out of -", his scoff interrupts what else I might have said and his dark green eyes dart from the security camera in the corner, back to my form at the glass.

"You have got to be joking," he says with anger building up in his voice, "You mean to break me out of here. What game are you playing at? Huh? Do you even know who you are playing with?"

Unfazed, I answer simply, "You're Loki Odinson, the trickster prince from Asgard, who, as I see it, doesn't have a plan to escape earth, unless his brother intervenes."

His anger persists on his face and I gesture to the camera, "It's off. I cut the feed, but we have maybe 15 more minutes before someone gets it back online or someone comes to check on you. I'm solo on this"

"And why should I trust you?"

"Because, who else have you got? The worst that could happen is that you end up right back in here. Just a failed escape plan..." He stands up slowly and walks towards me.

"What is your proposition?", he asks calmly.

"Well, in return for me letting you out, I'd like sex." I say blankly.

He blinks, "Excuse -"

"With you."

He stares at me confused, as if there was something not really right about me. Looking down, he turns slowly and begins to walk a few steps towards the center before stopping and laughing.

I glance at my watch and see that there's about 10 minutes left.

He turns and stalks back to me, "And say I accept your proposition. What's stopping me from ending your life the moment you let me out of here?"

I smile at him. "Because I've peaked your interest."

He scoffs.

"- And because I have an implant in my heart that keeps the implant somewhere in your body from exploding. As long as my heart beats, so does yours."

His face fills with anger once more. "What is this?! Why don't I know about this?"

"It was done in secret. They weren't going to mention it until it... until I needed to be used as a fail-safe."

He looks at me with distrust and I sigh looking at my watch once more. "There's 7 minutes left."

I walk back to the control panel and lift the glass box covering the hand scanner. My eyes lock back with his. "I let you out. You take me with you to whatever realm you feel most appropriate. Have sex with me and I'll deactivate the implant. You can leave me on whatever horrid planet you brought me to and never have to hear from me again."

His eyes look at me unchanging and I smile. "Deal?"

It becomes silent once more and we stand there but now I become impatient. Just as I go to hurry him he finally breaks the silence. "Deal."

I turn from him and place my hand on the scanner. The glass begins to slide open and I look back at him. Once the door is completely open, he takes slow steps towards me. Smiles as he approaches me and then quickly walks past me. I turn to watch him speed around the room looking for an exit and I sigh.

"Loki, what are you doing?"

He ignores me and continues in his quest.

"We only have about a minute left, y'know?"

He groans, "I'm looking for an exit." He walks by me again, stopping and leaning back towards me to whisper, "I still don't trust you by the way."

I roll my eyes as he walks on, "I noticed."

While he continues to search for an exit that would free him from these humans, I turn to the control panel again and press the button that opens the hatch below the cage. He stops and turns to me realizing that I might be certifiably insane. I grin widely, looking down at my watch and then back up at him. "Time's up."

With that I jump, and he stares down in disbelief before being shaken by the incoming footsteps and he drops his head, "Shit." He follows right behind me, catching up to me in no time. He looks at me and yells through the wind, "How the hell do you expect us to get out of this?"

I laugh, "Well, aren't you a god?"

"Don't tell me that's what you were counting on..."

Smiling knowingly, I grab his arm and pull him close, much to his vehement protests. I keep my grip and once I know we are out of detection range, I deploy the parachute I had put on right before entering the containment area. He looks at me almost with hatred but not completely. "I hate you"

I chuckle but don't say another word until we've landed safely on the ground.

6 notes · View notes

unsettledink · 3 years ago

Text

From the Ask Game Post celebrating finishing Act 1 of Gotcha:

H: How would you describe your style?

Long post summed up:

I have a descriptive writing style that leans toward the rambling and poetic, but doesn't always concern itself overmuch with grammatical rules, which can be very grating. I like to use repetition, whether it's in sentence structure or themes or visuals, and I find it more interesting to explore the sensory details of a scene than the action.

Everything I write is informed first by the emotional line; the rest follows from there, and I want the POV as intimate as possible to better present those emotions. I'm not fond of making things clear and obvious when I can come at them sideways, from basic description all the way to endings.

I tend to overcompensate in areas I don't feel comfortable, and luckily that seems to benefit me more than hurt.

Long post NOT summed up lol:

Breaking things down and starting with the more grammar related things:

I use a lot of long, often rambling sentences that contain way too many commas – most of the time they are technically acceptable, but... I'm really pushing it. There are some sentences floating around that are well over 100 words long whoops. That's definitely a thing that many people dislike or find difficult to engage with, jut sort of starting to skim over the words.

I personally tend to think it has some link to my ADHD, the tendancy within that to way over explain and go on and on in an attempt to make sure every single bit of ground is covered so there's less of a chance to be misunderstood, which in fact actually leads to the opposite as it's too many words and thoughts for others to follow at one time.

I.e., the above. :D

And to go along with that, my unholy love of semi-colons, though I came late to them. What's that, I don't have to start a new sentence, I can simple structure it slightly different and stick a semi-colon in there instead? YOU DON'T SAY! Now my excessively long sentences can remain grammatically correct up to 200 words!

I don't think is actually a good goal. But in seriousness, I think semi-colons are wildly underused and not nearly as hard to figure out as people act like they are; they're really just a beefed up a comma that can fix comma splices and fragments all on their own. :p

I also love my rule of threes, but I feel like once I point that out it's ten times more obvious. D: Why list something twice when you could do it one more time and then it's a PATTERN and it MEANS something more! Why use one word to describe something when you could have the build of THREE????? Look I have a problem. And yes I actively stopped myself from tossing in another 'Why when you could' in there and yes it hurt a little not to and yes I slipped up and did it in this sentence instead whoops.

There's some small things that probably have more influence on my style than I realize – like, I try pretty hard to avoid starting subsequent paragraphs with the same word, which can get tricky when all the characters are he's or there's a lot of dialogue, so that forces me to vary up my sentence structure and length and such even more. I'm also not a fan of using dialogue tags other than said that often – it's an instant back button for me if every single tag is something else my god why – so trying to keep myself from sliding into that or even 'said adverbly' pushes me to find other ways to show those same emotions and atmosphere.

I also – despite making it most of the way through a creative writing major – don't like... understand grammatical concepts easily. It's a weird thing, because I think learning about it is so cool and finding the terms for things I do or see is really exciting – I wish I could find a good book that went into real detail rather than being just about academic writing or english as second language – but if you hand me a sentence and ask me to identify parts, ummmm. I can probably give you the subject and verb. I can't even always remember which are adjective and which are adverbs lol. It's not like that matters in day to day life or anything, but I like having clear, specific terminology to talk about things with.

(This definitely happened because I read SO MUCH when I was younger, like at least a book a day for years and years and years and 'adult' books from early on. So that taught me to instinctively recognize what things should or should not look like/sound like, but I can't tell you why. It also means learning new languages is next to impossible for me because I don't have that base knowledge to grasp simple concepts.)

The biggest thing that falls about equally under grammar and style is this... bad habit I have. I've actively tried to tone it down in Gotcha, (and I need to go back to the first few chapters and fix them a little more) but there are definitely fics where I went way overboard with it, not even realizing at the time.

I tend to have a sentence, then drop the subject (or like, an entire clause lol) of the next sentence/s, if it's the same subject, creating sentence fragments. But in my head, it's clear those sentences are linked together, so it's not unclear or really a fragment, right???

(Examples and how I could NOT be lazy and fix it:)

“Uh,” Peter says. Pauses and ducks his head, like he’s embarrassed about this, ridiculous.

(“Uh,” Peter says; he pauses, ducking his head like he's embarrassed about this, which is ridiculous.)

But— it's been easy to talk like this, to Peter. To tell him things that he doesn't have to worry will go any further than the space between their bodies, curled close to each other. To talk to Peter, when he doesn't have to see his face, just a sliver of light in his eyes and a darker patch of space.

(But-- it's been easy to talk like this to Peter, to tell him things that Tony doesn't have to worry will go any further than space between their bodies, curled close to each other. It's been so much easier to talk to Peter when Tony doesn't have to see his face, just a sliver of light in his eyes and a darker patch of space.)

He turns his head to look at Peter, curled up on his stomach, face smashed into the pillow. Three months, and Peter thought it was worth celebrating. Had wanted to celebrate it, even if Tony was clueless about it.

(He turns his head to look at Peter, curled up on his stomach, face smashed into the pillow. It's only been three months, and Peter thought that was something worth celebrating. Peter had wanted to celebrate it, even if Tony was clueless about it.)

I could get all fancy and try to say I'm attempting to stylistically combine subject ellipsis with yoked sentences or something, but the reality is that I'm mostly being too lazy to go back and restructure things to work with my good friend the semi-colon, or just stick the damn subject back in there. I think part of it stems from wanting avoid starting sentences over and over with 'he' or someone's name, but that's just lazy writing.

I don't dwell on it too much and have mostly accepted it as a stylistic quirk; I really do think that when limited, in certain contexts it works well to create something a bit breathless (whether it's the long 'can't stop to take a breath there are so many things to get out' type or the 'can't catch my breath enough to get full sentences out' type) or stream of conscious-like. It can work well in sex scenes, or when you're deep in someone's thoughts But I know it's something that specifically drives a lot of people nuts and they can't stand to read much of it at all, and that's totally fair! They're even technically correct!

Then you get more into the purely stylistic areas!

I've been told, often, both in the fanfic world and outside it, that I have a 'very poetical style'. I think that's not inaccurate - for a long time I wrote far more poetry than prose. At some point, there started to be a significant amount of bleed over, where I was consistently hearing that my poetry felt almost prose like, and my prose almost poetry like (in a positive way 90% of the time, at least). What exactly makes something more poetry or prose like is a while other matter that I find a little baffling, honestly.

(I say, as I immediately sit down to think about it for too long.)

There's something very interesting to be said about the way poetry tends toward... a sparseness, trying to make a few words do the work of many, while at the same time being very descriptive rather than straightforward, trying to communicate these emotions and ideas and concepts through written out images and metaphors. It tends to feel very intentional (though that's often a LIE lol).

I think about that, and then I think about my adoration of the strict drabble, the older ONLY definition of exactly 100 words, of how challenging and fun it is to write those, how it really stretches your writing abilities sometimes. Having a specific concept and a specific number of words, having to be very intentional about every single one of them and yet still ending up three words over, trying to pick through it and figure out which ones to eliminate that leads to just rewriting the whole thing only now you're five words under-- I realize that sounds like hell for a lot of people, but I think it's so fucking cool. Or god, even better, three sentence fics. Admittedly I feel like I cheat at those a little, but technically they're still three sentences!!! >.> (I could go on about short form fic don't get me going.)

And that mindset can carry over to much longer things as well, though it's a little hilarious to say that in the context of Gotcha, where I have 100% indulged my every whim and cut nothing. (Not true actually! I have a whole document full of scenes and conversations and entire interactions that had to go.)

On the flip side of that, going to that very descriptive sort of sideways approach to depicting things, which is something I think I tend to do? I don't know, this thought isn't quite as formed in my head. Just, using five different ways to express something rather than SAYING it.

There are also some things I am honest to god just terrible at. Plot is the biggest overarching one. I just... I literally cannot conceptualize a plot on it's own, if that makes any sense. It's easier when it's fanfic, because I can do more of a ninety degree angle of 'but what if' instead of starting from scratch, but otherwise, I can only form this sort of vague linking of a couple events and god, it's so boring to try and figure out more. This is why, until now, I haven't written long things.

Seriously! Pre 2019, I think my most of my works hovered between 100 words to 1000. I had one long thing and while I love it and the concept, I didn't put it together well. (I dream of finding the time to go back and redo it someday, for all three readers lol.) Even now, most of my recent fic that's gotten over 10k is only because I like to drag those sex scenes OUT.

And I think I struggle with plot because I don't think in terms of plot. I think in terms of emotion. It's like the very very far end of the 'plot driven vs character driven' scale? Almost everything I write comes from an emotion first, and follows the emotional line more than anything. A more traditional plot may form around it, but even if it does, I'm not thinking of it that way?

Like, say alternate Aegis ending A) – I guess the plot is, uh, Quentin doesn't die and how do they deal with that now, with Peter having bonded him and SHIELD wanting his head and Quentin still wanting all the adoration? But that's not what I'm writing about. I'm writing about how this furious, horribly vulnerable version of Quentin manages to find a way to have even the smallest amount of trust in Peter, how he's navigating the push pull of what he wants (and has had to suppress wanting) and what his new, completely different from him Alpha wants, how Peter can find a way to repair things when Quentin has this ingrained distrust and has literally just had it violated even more by Peter. At it's core, it's a story about trust, and I have to deal with these obnoxious things like 'well what does Fury do while they're figuring it out?' Ugh, I don't know! Who cares! Not me! Why can't they just sit and have a lot of feelings at each other??

Except it's fanfic, so they can! :D

That got considerably off track um. Right. The point there was that one of the things that I think makes my writing seem more poetry like is that intense focus on emotion, and use of emotional reactions to show other things.

(I'm also really terrible at creating new characters, which is why I'll probably never bother to publish stuff. Fanfic has the bonus of characters that we're already attached to and that have already been developed, so I can skip making you care and just dig straight into the finer points of characterization mmmmm.)

Linked closely with that are a couple other things:

Because I want the focus to be on the emotions, I also want that POV to be as close and intimate as possible. In Gotcha we're incredibly far into Quentin's head, which we need because Quentin is deliberately blind to his own emotions (and also how else can we have any sympathy for such a godawful person). I'm almost always going to go with close limited third, and will struggle to even switch out chapters in the same fic with different POV's. And I really like to write that POV using a character that's not reliable – not necessarily deliberately so, but by their very nature – either insane or damaged or distinctly off human norm.

(You know what my absolute favorite POV is? Second person. Oh my GOD I love second person POV and I almost never ever see it in fic, much less done well, and most of the published books I've read in it use it as more of a gimmick than in earnest – when it's even actual second and not like, hybrid with parts in a different POV or straight up LYING to me about being second Raven Tower I'm looking at you. Again don't get me started.)

Also probably because I'm fixating on the emotions, I tend to focus a lot on sensory details. There's not a lot of me automatically thinking to describe rooms or environments, unless there's some sort of interesting lighting situation going on, but I am all about the tactile feel and smell and taste and sound of things. Sound ends up being more prominent then the other in Gotcha, I think, but it depends on the fic.

I think those senses are something people forget about all too easily, and I tend to say it's one of the easiest ways to make your sex scenes more interesting. Hell, if you're worried about the choreography of it or just don't want to bother, you can drop ninety percent of that and focus entirely on those sensory details, lay out just how much they're overwhelming the character and it'll be as hot as any graphic sex scene. It's totally my fall back when I'm not getting anywhere with 'when dick goes in where how'.

(That said I do seem to bounce between that type of sex scene and 'I will now describe every single movement made in great detail' type, Idk why. I think I'm terrible at like, fight choreography or just people moving around, but feel pretty comfortable and confident in the sex choreography. Though that's possibly because it's something I've put concerted effort into, a subject for another time.)

I've had to put a deliberate effort into the sort of environment/scene setting stuff a lot more, writing Gotcha, and it's so haaaaaard. Shorter fics, or smut fics, I can get away with 'eh they're in a bedroom there's a bed it's fine', but since Quentin and Peter spend so much goddamn time on that couch, I have to figure out how to keep it from becoming scene after scene of talking heads, or find things for them to do while they're out and about so I can get to the conversation I really WANT to write, and I'm always like... but how do people people? Catch me googling 'scenes of people walking down the street' because I have never seen another human being in my life, apparently. It ebbs and flows depending on how much energy I had to put into any one scene, because it's one of the first things to go.

Sticking with sex scenes though, that highlights something else I think I tend to do, and not just during the smut (though it's more noticeable there), which also goes back to that vague thing I had about approaching things sideways. Sex scenes in particular are almost never about the sex itself; I've had them called fraught or tense often, and I think it's because they might be fucking, but the narrative is really about something else, some emotion (lol surprise) or conversation or fight or connection, that just happens to be accompanied by orgasms.

Honestly, even when I start with sex, like for kinktober, the thing that makes it work when I'm writing is finding that underlying emotion that the fic is really about, that drives the character's desire for that kink. That's true even when characters are doing some activity that isn't sex or sitting around emoting, they're doing it because it's a cover for the real underlying content they're not ready to be open about or acknowledge. So apparently I don't like directness!

With those underlying things, too, I'm a big fan of themes and threads that are drawn through the entire work, especially if there's a big payoff for it, but even if there isn't! Even if I'm the only one who probably notices! It makes me happy to have it there, that inner lit nerd that likes to take things apart geeking out. :) (Ask me about Gotcha's sometime actually don't lol I'll never shut up and also spoilers.)

Ooooo, and how titles can tie into that and introduce a whole other level that I know mostly people don't care about lol. Then slightly different from that are the themes I return to again and again, so I think seeing those crop again becomes part of my style as well – like, terrible comparison, but you don't got to a Nolan movie expecting a clear, simply presented narrative lol (and there's probably going to be some sort of weird time distortion shit going on). It used to be that you don't read an unsetteld fic without expecting some character death, but that's pretty much a thing of the past.

Oh and with endings - I like my open endings! I like them ambiguous or dangling or emotionally completely but not plot wise, in writing and reading and watching things. You're very seldom going to find me annoyed about a 'what happened, really? Decide for yourself, this is a collaborative creative experience' @the-me09 don't kill me. I have had to force myself to be a little less so sometimes or add on just a few more hundred words to avoid being murdered in my sleep. (When we get there, I will 100% point out where the original ending for Gotcha was and sit back for people to scream at me.)

I always say I'm bad at dialogue and people disagree, which is very nice, but truthfully, it comes out as well as it does because I spend so much time and effort on it. I can bang out a smut scene of several thousand words in an hour or two and feel pretty good about it, but five hundred words of talking, especially if it's not about something emotionally fraught? Kill me now, I'll be here for the next week. Though I suppose that goes to show that if you are feeling unsure or uncertain about some element of your writing, buckling down and really focusing on it specifically is worth the trouble. Like I said about choreographing sex scenes, five million words ago.

I don't think it's something I'll let myself get into too in depth here, but I'd say my writing style is also very much informed and influenced by who I read, published and online, and who I grew up reading. Which can be said of every author lol! There are things other authors do that I admire so much that, almost entirely subconsciously, I try to emulate it-- or more, I'm so captured by those ideas and ways of doing things that I find myself playing with the same aspects if with less skill.

Thank you for reading my book on the subject, you know what else is distinctive about my style? A LACK OF CONCISENESS ye gods.

#ask games #act1 and done

3 notes · View notes