#poor rasmus

[novemberhush]

Me, watching episode 4 of The Day of the Jackal: Is anyone else getting the vibe that security guard who wanded the Jackal after he set off the metal detector was into him? And the Jackal was maybe playing into it a little?

Me, six minutes later: I knew it!

(I imagine international assassins have to be good at reading people quickly, and the Jackal read Rasmus and thought ‘gay’ (correctly) and based his interactions with Rasmus on that assessment, flirting with him in order to get closer. Unfortunately I have a bad feeling about poor Rasmus’ life expectancy because it looked like the Jackal deliberately picked his metal detector to go through and that’s likely because he figured Rasmus was the best option for someone he could disguise himself as and use his identity to get into the venue on the night his target is due to be there. And it hasn’t worked out too well in the past for the other people he’s disguised himself as to get close to his targets.)

[whatarewedoingdude]

I FUCKING KNEW HE WAS GONNA DO IT I FUCKIN KNEW IT

[sugarcube-stillabookworm]

should have bet on the day of the jackal making a stronger appearance on tumblr right after the jackal kissed another guy because that's very on brand and also very funny considering i'm like 95% sure my man rasmus is gonna be dead next ep. or like, the one after that if he's lucky lol

[ugartecoco]

rasmus having his ear yapped off consoling bruno

[rosmerie-starr]

Hanahaki Echo

(Full body ref under cut)

[reydeyflummyx759z]

A Sneezy Bar Dream

Hoo, boy... Here's a dream I had last night.

Man, I've had lots of dreams about sneezy ladies, but this one? Worth mentioning here.

I was at the bar by myself, and a lady with an eyepatch was serving me a free margarita. I start drinking the citrusy margarita when suddenly, I see that the bartender has a long, perky nose with teardrop nostrils that took up almost all of her nose. A hell of a nose, especially when adorned with a septum piercing. As in, if you looked at her from below, you'd see how freaking huge they were. She looked like a mixture between White and Middle Eastern.

Even her breasts were huge, but that's not the point...

I thought nothing about it and started looking at the television, which was a basketball game. Ten minutes into being at the bar, the bartender's nose starts twitching. She did nose wriggles, nose pinching, and nose rubbing—in a sanitary way, of course. The thing wasn't just how long and expressive her nostrils were, but how she was extremely vocal about her allergies.

And I mean, so vocal about her allergies that you couldn't ignore it.

"Just one more minute and I'll start sneezing like a fuckin' maniac!" My sneeze-loving self thought her proclamation was all but bold to make. It was then that I took a deeper look at the bartender. She wore a black tuxedo with a blue plaid tie. She had her long black hair in a high ponytail, and she even had a long side fringe covering the eyepatch. The eyepatch was a sparkly blue underneath, which I thought was adorable. Her right eye was a bright hazel that looked like a tiger gem, which made her look like an exotic creature. Her name?

Imogen.

Fuckin' Imogen.

That was a name for one of my OCs, so the fact I came across a beauty with the name was already kind of hot. If her name was "Soura," "Kazumi," or God forbid, "Caoimhe," I would've bolted out of the bar right then and there. The fact this woman asserted herself as an Alpha Woman was already enough for me. The way she was talking didn't help matters either. Her nostrils then widened, and that was when I knew she was going to sneeze. Cue Imogen taking an order for an old white gentleman, who had on a St. Louis Blues shirt and a torn-up 1980s St. Louis Rams jacket. He smelled dirty, but who was I to comment on that?

But yes, back to the tall and sexy Imogen.

Imogen was taking an order for the man when she loudly proclaimed, "I'm gonna sneeze!" She turned to the side, took three hitchy breaths, and let out what I interpreted as a Dad's sneeze. "HUHH'RASSSHHH-HOOO!" The "HOO!" part was high-pitched and shrill, almost like Jesus H. Christ needed to hear this goddess sneeze. Under normal circumstances, her bold and rambunctious sneeze would've made me bolt right then and there. But this woman? I felt entranced by her.

Cue her boss saying "Bless you, for the umpteenth time..." The boss was a muscular man who sounded Baltic or Scandinavian (His name was Rasmus from the nametag). One part of my mind went, "poor dude's gotta endure her sneezing for 12 hours." On the other hand, I wondered if Imogen was into girls.

"Why, thank you, Razzie~" Her accent sounded Middle-Eastern, but not enough to where you'd comment on it. Even the way she said it was sexier than how I'd imagine anyone that bold to announce their sneezes... and this is coming from someone into sneezing ladies. "Wait... holy shit... HAAAAAASHHH-HIIIEW!" Goddamn it, Imogen... Now, bound by fate's string, I was forced to drink the margarita and hear the woman's outbursts.

Then, my bold self asked Imogen, "Are you okay?"

Turning to me, with the toothiest grin, the woman sniffed the air like a dog processing her surroundings. Her nostrils widened at this intake of air. "Ah, don't worry about me, luv. It's just these fuckin' allergies."

So I knew: she was going to sneeze again.

From the time I thought this to the time I looked at the time, realizing I might've overstayed my welcome, Imogen grabbed a plaid handkerchief, hovering it over her long, twitching nose. "Uhh... huh-huh-huh-hhhHHASSSSHHHHH-HHHIEWWW!! Huhhh.... RRRRESCHHH-HHHOOOO!! HASHHHHOOOOO!!!" And then...

"If you sneeze one more time, everyone is getting free drinks!" A customer proclaimed.

"T-that's dot how ihh... oh bugger, I--hih-HIHH!! HIIIISHHHIEWWW! HEEESCHHHOOOO! ASSSHHHOOOO! ASHHHHOOO! AAh'HASCHHHH-IIIIEW!!" Her nose did a wiggle, and she muffled a sneeze "HRRSCHHHmmmph-FHEW!" Needless to say, I had to steel myself to keep from looking at her.

Everyone cheered, knowing that every drink they were going to get was free. The lady's nose proclaimed it. I pretended to watch the game.

So she sauntered over to me! ME!

"Want another drink, luv?" Clearly, she thought I was the prettiest one in the bar, as she attempted to hit on me multiple times, only for me to say something along the lines of "sorry, I gotta work tomorrow."

And then... It was almost like her nose was begging for yet another release and teasing me. At that moment, all of her attention was on me. With the sweetest doe eyes she could muster, Imogen gave me a free water. Seconds later, "Whoo, shit, I'm gonna have to sneeze my way outta this... two more minutes and I'll sneeze my ass outta here!" The time was 11:58 PM. From that, I knew Imogen's shift was about to end. Then...

The sneezy dam broke...

"huhh-HASHHHIEW! HAhh'ITSCHHHOOO! HAIIISHHH-HOOO! ESCHhhh'HIIIEWW! Huhh... HUUURRRASHHHH'HOOO! HASHHHOOO! EASHHHH'OO! Huh-huh-HRASCHHHHIIIEWWW!!!" At that point, I realized the time, and Imogen blows her nose... hard.

Three minutes later, a blue card is slid my way. It was Imogen's phone number on the card.

"Call me~" She smiled...

--------------------------------------

And that was the end of my dream.

[our-future-is-up-to-us-2]

all of these are the prettiest things

Raaaaaaa another Narcovember fic! Originally just going to be a normal fic, but then I wormed the prompt in and we're back! Fic number 15 @narcosfandomdiscord

Prompt #20, Book Of Sleight Of Hand: Brace

Word Count: 1.1K

Relationships: Charles "The Jackal" Calthrop/Rasmus

Warnings: None

~ Read the fic under the cut ~

It’s always the quiet moments that draw them in. Peter sits about, examining blueprints, mulls over documents on his computer or phone, while Rasmus takes to watching him, or making some food.

At least, that’s when they’re not entangled in work, or each other. When the quiet moments come, things are gentle, and, as Peter disarmingly feels, very romantic. 

Rasmus hums to himself as he works, and every so often, they look up at each other, drinking in the moment, blushing and smiling like school kids. Of course, the feeling is not embarrassment, it’s the last thing akin to that. 

The Jackal supposes… Well, he doesn’t know what to suppose anymore, switching between architecture and transactions, Dark Core and a surprisingly plain email account. He’s still playing his game, still working through his job. He has not stopped being an assassin just because of Rasmus– 

And yet, and yet, he feels the pull, he feels both powerful and helpless, able to do as much or as little as he pleases. The taste of his lips, his body, all of him, is a powerful drug. 

Worse than that is his smile. Just a flicker of it, a small laugh, a stupid little thought that only Rasmus is amused by… Oh, how intoxicating.  

It’s the little things that make him want to drop those obligations and run. But his American hirer is counting on him, awaiting his shot against UDC. 

In a few short days, he’ll be off somewhere else. Whether it’s back to Spain, or coasting in London, awaiting a new target… 

His stomach lurches at the former. Wife and child, worrying about him, thinking about him constantly. 

Meanwhile, he’s here, in Estonia of all places, basking in the sunlight that is Rasmus. 

“I was thinking about this last night,” Peter says, and Rasmus looks up from the soup he’s started to boil, “Your name, Rasmus… Where does it come from? What sort of meaning does it have? Because Peter, god, it feels terribly ordinary.”  

And it’s not like Charles is much better. Far too regal. He notes. 

“Might be ordinary, but it’s you,” The blond chuckles, “And I love that. I love you. As for me?” He ponders it for a while, trying to trace it all back. “Rasmus… Well, it means ‘beloved’ if I remember correctly… And I’m Estonian, so it’d have to be Nordic.” 

Every thought in Peter’s head proceeds to stop. The article he’s reading doesn’t even matter anymore. He goes as far as to shut his laptop, placing his hands over his knees. He then watches them as they shake. 

It all makes sense. Of course, it does. Every hit that The Jackal is after, there’s always a plan, a method to his madness. But this? Angel, beloved, Rasmus, staring at him as his face starts to pale. 

And even worse, he just… Says that. Three little words: Like icing sugar on a cake, like an afterthought. 

He loves me.  

***

The Jackal attempts to summon up a sentence, a smile, a nod, anything. 

Instead, he’s paralysed. Stuck there, having to brace himself for an impact that’s already made contact.  

He’s managed to quell his shaking, biting the inside of his cheek to compensate. The words run through his head at a million miles an hour: I love that. I love you. Rasmus? It means ‘beloved’... 

He runs a hand through his hair, mulling it all over now. There’s a part of him that’s ready for this conversation, ready to ask Rasmus to come over and  soothe him, but by the time he’s snapped back to reality, he’s already there. 

The blond sighs loudly, eyes downcast, but he reaches out for Peter’s hand, squeezing it. “That was probably poor judgement on my part.” He murmurs, “I’m not even drunk… Just– A lapse in the moment. But… It doesn’t mean it’s not true. I do love you, Peter. But you don’t have to say it back, because that’s scary, and that’s making a commitment, and, hell, you’ll be going in a few days–” 

“I know.” The Jackal practically whispers, and Rasmus is just relieved to hear his voice again. “I know. On my end, I guess… It was very sudden. And in my brain, it was like everything shattered and then pieced itself back together again.” 

He opts to rest his head on the other’s shoulder, keeping his hand in his as he closes his eyes. He takes a few deep breaths, the silence less overwhelming now, and he recalibrates. 

He’s The Jackal. A fucking world-class assassin. 

And whilst he feels the most human he’s ever been, it helps to remind himself of his purpose. 

He supposes he can keep in contact with Rasmus, just in case. Just in case things don’t work out, just in case he’s ever visiting Estonia when he’s free from the clutches of it all, just in case he needs a break from Nuria.

He’s already taking a long break from her, and yet, her insistence on being in his life, well… It’s natural, but feels overbearing. 

Rasmus is instead soft, comforting, electric, wild. A new journey in a place he’s never been, a new spark that he hasn’t felt for anyone, because his first and only love was declared by the fates to be a waitress. 

But, that doesn’t make a wife, well, the be all and end all. If he can be an assassin without worry, then what’s the harm of two identities? 

He opens his eyes now, nesting his head there, in safety. 

“It makes sense, though, Rasmus. Everything makes sense with you. Your name, your smile, your infectious levels of positivity, beard, eyes– I feel like I’ve fallen under a spell with you. If Rasmus means ‘beloved’, then I won’t just… Leave that unfulfilled.” 

Peter adjusts now, sitting upright and facing the other man, running  his free hand gently across his cheek. He sighs, thinks it over, just briefly, seeing Rasmus’ eyes so wide, so adoring… 

There’s no turning back on him now. Because, then, it’s not just betraying him, but also betraying a deep and joyous part of himself that’s been waiting to burst open again, into the light. 

“Yeah?” The blond exhales with a smile. 

“Yeah. I love you, Rasmus. I really do. And I’m sorry that I’ll be leaving in a few, but better to tell you now than never.” 

The blond leans forward and pecks his lips, carding his fingers through his brown hair, “God, I’m so glad you did. I didn’t wanna pressure you, but it feels right. It feels good. And even if you have to go, long distance works just fine, doesn’t it?” 

Peter chuckles and settles for a proper kiss, a heartfelt one, deeper, and the laugh is still rumbling through him. 

“Oh, beloved,” He says when they part for air, “Long distance, short distance, any distance. If it’s for you, it’s just fine.” 

And Rasmus is stuck there, speechless, blushing stunningly, and filled with nothing but adoration. 

[imutrt]

Ep 7 spoilers

Poor guy just cant catch a damn break ( RIP Rasmus sir you and the Jackal lowkey had more chemistry than him and Nuria) pissing in a bottle thats real dedication right there😭

also can we talk about how good he looks in a military uniform?? Like Eddie's face just naturally feels kind of innocent and i think that contrasts really well with the stereotype of military men being hard and gruff in the entertainment industry.

[unitedbydevils]

Match Review: FCSB 0-2 Manchester United

Whoa whoa whoa. Did I see some... good football?

Early caveat before people kick my teeth in: I said SOME, not a lot. That being said, the kids are alright eh?

United delivered more of the same tepid football in the first half; controlling at least, but never looking that creative or dangerous aside one unlucky Kobbie Mainoo chance on what actually turned out to be his first major European start. Madness. I could have sworn he'd started prior to this but nope. Anyway, Kobbie started, and in the 10, and it really suited him.

Amorim unlocked matters with his half-time substitutes though, bringing in Garnacho and Amad for Collyer and Malacia. More intent, more pace, and more running at people. Lovely.

Garnacho pounced on a poor backpass from FCSB immediately in the second half, but his effort glanced off the Bucharest far post and out for a goal kick.

United's first goal would come in the 60th minute through Diogo Dalot, who was freshly at LWB having played on the right in the first half. An Amad throw, a nodded pass from Eriksen, and a beautiful squared pass low across the box. Was Hojlund ready? no. But Dalot was committed, back post, ready to side foot home.

Actually, we'll pause on Rasmus Hojlund. He's been poor lately and rightly getting criticised, but when we look at the stats below we can see what he didn't score but did put in a shift. Ruben Amorim will want - and certainly needs - more from the Dane, but he's not slacking.

United's second came eight minutes later through that boy again - Kobbie Mainoo. A sloppy pass inwards from Dalot was met by a sloppier touch from FCSB. Dalot wins the ball back, tees up Hojlund, off to Mainoo behind him, wide to Garnacho, and beautifully cut back at an acute angle for Kobbie Mainoo to first time hit a strong finish into the bottom right corner. No mad dash from Kobbie to alert defenders, just careful running, precise timing and solid technique. Props to Garnacho for keeping aware of his teammate's run too. Excellent vision and execution.

Indeed, Garnacho's running and directness was much more evident today and much more impactful. FCSB aren't a great team, so it makes a bit of sense, but they're in the second European competition - they're not nobodies either. Aside hitting the post, he also played Bruno Fernandes through for a great chance that narrowly didn't go in.

This was the half of nearlies in all honesty. Garna hit the post. Bruno missed this. De Ligt nodded wide twice on late corners for United. Fine margins but ones that could take United from a modest 2-0 win to a sensational 6-0 thrashing - something confidence is borne from.

Regardless, it was a win away from home in Europe and a clean sheet. Bayindir was barely troubled but did his part, and it means that Amorim hasn't lost in this Europa League... group? league? stage.

Aside the madness of being the only unbeaten team (albeit not actually top of the table) we can see that Amorim is following in Fergie's footsteps with some positive stats in Europe.

We can also see this grim stat that we've finally won three in a row. Good lord.

The timing comes beautifully, because yours truly has been gifted a box seat ticket (+ food) for United vs Palace through work. The downside is I have to dress nice, but the upside is hopefully I can see us get some revenge on Palace for all the grief they caused us under Erik Ten Hag. A good win over them could jump us into 11th... but Brentford have Spurs so we'll be staying 12th. Shame.

Kick off is 2pm at Old Trafford on Sunday.

[weirdthoughtsandideas]

So I found a book where danish kids has been asked their views about children and birth. Here’s some highlights

”Sometimes you’re yellow in the face when you’re newborn…” - Barbara, 6

”… it’s not the child that gets {yellow}, the dad is.” - Mohammed, 7

”It’s fun when mom gives birth, because then you get McDonalds with your dad.” - Rasmus, 6

”My little sister was born too early. So dad hadn’t been able to do the dishes.” - Rikke, 8

”Vera’s dad left when she was born. But I think they’re still looking for him.” - Christian, 7

”The dad is really nervous and sit and talk all the time. That’s why he can’t be at the birth.” - Kirstie, 8

”The dad can’t tickle the baby when it has just come out. Because it can happen it (the baby) is not used to it.”

”When you’re born, you come to a place where you can breathe. I haven’t gone there yet.” - Rebecca, 6

”I know twins that look alike. Only that the other one is 10 minutes bigger than the other.” - Emil, 8

”If the babies drink the same milk they become twins.” - Mathias, 8

”If they get two kids at once and mom can’t birth both, the dad can give birth to one.” - Rikke, 6

”If the mom doesn’t notice she got three kids then it’s just to remove two.” - Emil, 7

”It doesn’t matter if babies play on the road, because they’re so small cars can’t run over them.” - Alexander, 8

”When you have a little baby you need to make sure it doesn’t smell. Or else the dad will never want to kiss it” - Lotte, 8

”When the baby is born, the mom shouldn’t forget to buy a bra” - Katrine, 8

”You can’t forget to feed the baby, or else it becomes too thin and the intestinals won’t fit.” - Carl, 7

”If the baby has done something really good you need to complement it. Even if it smells.” - Lucas, 7

”Babies need pacificers, or else they’ll make a giant big hickey on the mom.” - Sofie, 8

”When the baby gets home you can’t forget to buy saturday candy* to them and put them in a lot of diapers.” - Maj Beate, 7

*I don’t know how many countries this is a thing in but in the Nordic countries, to make kids not eat too much candy all the time, it’s often common to only let them eat candy on saturday. This is not a rule like an american tiktoker once made it seem like it was, but rather just something parents tell their kids so they don’t eat too much sugar all the time. Every nordic kid has the experience of walking inside the room in the middle of the week and find your parents eating candy, and exclaim ”BUT IT’S NOT SATURDAY?!”

”When the baby is small you should buy a bed with tree trunks with holes in them, so they can look out” - Fadi, 8

”You can’t forget to buy a little hook so the baby can’t get out and make a mess everywhere.” - Bjørn, 6

”The baby can’t drink from a glass when it’s newborn. That’s why the mom pours it in her breast” - Philip, 6

”It doesn’t matter if the kids eat at Makke Donnas*. If you just take away the pickle it’s pretty healthy.” - Rebecca, 6

*I think she means McDonalds but this is how a danish child would pronounce it. My brother pronounced it similarly and we’re swedish. But Makke Donnas might be an actual place in Denmark what do I know

”It doesn’t matter if the child drinks coca cola - it helps when you’re hurt.” - Rasmus, 6

”A tree is called tree. A chair is called chair. Pregnant is called pregnant and that’s why my name is Laura.” - Laura, 7

”It’s only in Vietnam and in poor countries that children should work. In Denmark they shouldn’t, cause we’re millionaires.” - Maj Beate, 7

”I’m gonna go to the cinema and watch ’the ringer of Nutella’*. But I don’t know who to go with. Cause it’s forbidden.” - Nikolaj, 5

*I think he means the hunchback of notre dame, in some translations the title is ”the ringer of notre dame” instead.

”If I have kids I won’t give them a blue eye*. Cause that shows on you.” - Sofus, 7

*They mean it like they’re gonna punch them so their eye gets a bruise, not that their eye color would be blue

”I think it’s ok to get grounded if you have set fire on the pillows.” - Kim, 9

”You have to be nice to your child by asking them to take the trash out in a kind way.” - Maria, 6

[quibbs126]

So I’ve been drawing this today

It’s a redraw of this picture I made a good 3 or so years ago

Funny enough, this isn't technically the origin of the picture either, as I made a pose base for it that I just ended up reusing with these two, which was originally taken from a Pokémon anime screenshot that featured Jesse and Steven in wedding outfits (I don't think I have a picture of that original)

Anyways, so I made this because I was drawing these guys again, as you already know, and I just wanted to redraw this piece, seeing as how I was already redesigning them. This also gave me a good time to figure out Rasmus' green design

Also note I ended up asking my friend for ideas with the trio's new names, and she suggested Cinder for Rasmus. The name fits his theme, but I don't know if I'm personally sold yet. Personally, I like Cedar but upon looking it up, cedar isn't really a dark brown color, if anything it's more red, so

I did end up changing his colors to a more yellowish hue, which made me think of olives. So I think I might make his birth name Olive

I feel like Olive is seen as a more feminine name, while Basil would be more masculine, when it's the opposite here. Ah well

I tried to give them more "western" style outfits, but I really did end up just making something up. I think it turned out fine though

The flower in Periwinkle's hair is supposed to be like a rose, but I don't actually know how to draw roses, and can only vaguely remember how a super cartoony rose I saw was drawn, so have a flower that's kind of just...something

Also, she doesn't normally wear a flower in her hair, but the depicted scene is supposed to be when they got married, so it's a special occasion. They eloped to be together, so their marriage wasn't really much of anything other than paperwork and a nice dinner, but it was still a very happy day for them

I was originally going to give them the normal colored outlines I give characters, but I got this dark blue and was like "screw it, make that the whole outline color" and so I did. Gives me a blue ballpoint feel and I like it. I did do Olive's horns a different color, but I usually draw those horns like that, it just doesn't look right with normal line colors

And I just realized I forgot their tails. They do have them, but I keep forgetting they exist when I draw them. I mean I suppose they aren't that important, but still

Also, while I wasn't able to portray it, Olive is supposed to be very fluffy. It didn't feel entirely right to have his chest fur be out so you can see it, and I was struggling with giving the characters chin fur prior, so I didn't put that. I do have to come up with a solution to that. Also, while Olive was fluffy and soft, after his transformation his fur basically singed off and he hasn't been able to grow any more than short, rough fur. It is something he mourns but isn't that pressing in the grand scheme of the disaster he found himself in

Also while we're here, I might as well explain some backstory between these two

So Periwinkle comes from a rich, aristocratic family while Olive came from a somewhat poor one, where he and his mother worked at the local tavern. Olive's parents had him young and on accident, and a few years in his dad dipped due to his rising music career (though he did regularly send them some of his earnings), and Basil's pretty bitter about the whole situation

Anyways, so Perri and Olive eventually met and fell in love. However, Perri's family disapproved of their romance due to Olive's status, and Basil disapproved because this was exactly how she got into her situation (it wasn't exact, the two couples had very different relationships, but it was close enough for Basil to see their relationship as rubbish). So they eventually decided to run away so they could be together, with some help coming from Perri's sisters, who thought that Olive's status also didn't matter and they knew he was a good guy

Things would end up going horribly for them, but at least for a couple years, they were happy together

And yeah, that's this. Legit, I'm really proud of how this redraw came out, and I like looking at the clear improvement

[lilisouless]

Uninspired for the fic , so I’ll do my self promo

Just for fun: First words spoken by the characters so far (I’ll highlight the important ones since i asume not everyone will be of interest)

Alina- the cream better be good

Mal-Sorry, I wanted to call your attention

Kaz-Good morning

Hanne-Come on,Mila, I’ll sit you next to the wind-

Zoya: hey! Leave my husband alone!

Genya: Don’t bother.Mal is a cheap whore

Aleks@nder: I know. Didn’t want to do it but she left me no choice. She already knew the consequences of betrayal.

Jarl Brum: Calm down ,everyone,please. The attack to the sheriff’s poor mother has been a tragedy,but our observations tell us that the bats were disturbed because of the fog.

Colm: Sir,with all due respect. I would gladly give help to the woman,but i am not to blame for what happened…

Van eck : Fahey

Sergei: You’d have it for not quite time,i suppose

Nadia: Sergei! Didn’t I told you to not bother my clients?

Marie: Sweetheart, don’t tell me you were messing up with this poor newcomer girl

Paja: Mr Brekker,the crow got into the store again

Sankta Neyar: Can i help you?

Ulla: When I open my eyes , this will only be something about the wind and you’ll be gone.

Roffe: Fucking,bitch!

Baghra: are you going to do the same every time?

Alys: Roffe and i used to share a love for music.

Rasmus: Are you planning on comforting the widow? You’d get your mother off your back

Vasily: I don’t think so,she is more than used. She’s given birth six times. It’s better to wait until the oldest one turns…

Signy: How dare you to come here? Do you want to goad? To mock me?

Pekka Rollins: Miss, I think you have my son’s plush toy

Kirigin: idiot!

Nina: (as Mila) Merry Unbirthday! (As herself) I look so pale!

Ivan: and how come you can’t tell us exactly where you were that night?

Nikolai: Please, i am not here to fight. This face is too valuable to have burns.

Fruzsi: Leave one untouched, we still need to find the bodies

Vatra: It’s never a waste

Inej: I understand cops are like the soldiers here. So I was able to steal from them with no remorse

Liliyana (through memories) : i love Lily of the valley

Ana Kuya: Those are for the Duke, they are not healthy for you

Fedyor: Alina , right? He is not going anywhere. The body will be at the hospital,you’d be able to go see it there.

Joost: Excuse me,you can’t be here

Anya: Excuse me

Jesper: ugh! What the-

The duke: Fairies don’t just go around saving kids

[sunshinemayhem]

watching arrow season 1 | spoilers and incoherent rambling ahead

morally dubious as fuck

laurel, mr. lance, and oliver are all different forms of justice i love it

love the fact that ollie acknowledges he's not a hero.

wtf is up with his mom is she evil

the bodyguard is just there LOL

"five years ago your irresponsibility was somewhat charming, it is a lot less now" GUYS i feel for him

this man who kills terrible people without giving them a second chance is morally wrong. i however kill them after they squander the second chance, so i am morally correct.

almost all the characters here are morally dubious and honestly i just wanna see it play out

actually i'm starting to like the bodyguard

oh he's actually very important to the narrative isn't he?

oh gods don't be foolish there is plot armour there is plot armour there is plot arm- oh thank goodness you're alive

oliver is actually so important to me i feel for him i dont support all he does but gahakjda

rasmus or deadshot? please i love dig ok. yup i thought he'd choose laurel i hated that to my core

oliver please let laurel and tommy go and maybe they'll come back to you

oh poor tommy. "if she knew who you really were, she'd choose you" is crazy. godsaklfds he had to break up with her and not even really tell her why

i really really want tommy and oliver to be good friends oh my god.

ok thea and the kid thief are cute

oh they're gonna find the hood together wow y'all

ollie telling laurel he's still in love with her okay man

i really love him being there for his sister, like siblinghood. "hi roy, i'm thea's disapproving older brother" man he's awesome

GODS he's getting back with laurel? what about tommy???? you fucking gave him advice

i don't like this i don't like this please be okay be okay

not mr. merlin beating up oliver finding out his identity and being like oooof conflict of interest what about tommy and moira

the scariest thing is that there are a lot. of real elements to this

"nobody in my life is who i thought they were. except you." okay so this is such an important facet to their relationship okay--she is actually the one person who stuck to her guns. and her father too ig. the sad part is though he's still kinda not who she thinks he is? maybe?

i love all the plot heavy bits but wow i cannot stop from taking apart the relationship and criticizing and ranting here maybe i should just trust in the authors

wait this is actually such a nice last episode

tommy finding out that oliver was telling the truth? mr. lance speaking up to the police and risking getting fired? moira speaking to the public and solving so many problems?

"he'll kill you, oliver." "i know" AKJHFKJSDHFLSK

DIG I LOVE YOU

"amazing. a two year operation undone because a young playboy happened to wash up ashore." hey i love htis don't undermestimate him

laurel's father calling her oh my gods

....there's another bomb?

he died? he died??? HE DIED KLDS GUYS HE APOLOGIZED "IT SHOULD'VE BEEN ME" HJDSFKAHDSJL oh my godi'm literally tearing up no no NO NO it sure is a way to solve the love triangle bu ti liked tommy and oliver lying about his dad i- jksadfl ƒt4

[oeldeservesthenorris]

“My best years are behind me.” Erik Johnson knows what he is at this point of his career. But the Flyers will need him -- and fellow veteran Marc Staal -- if they are going to get into the playoffs.

NOT ENOUGH CRYING EMOJIS FOR THIS ARTICLE

TAMPA, Fla. — If nothing else, Erik Johnson is self-aware. The newly acquired Philadelphia Flyers defenseman, after morning skate at Amalie Arena on Saturday, admitted he hasn’t had the greatest season as part of a disappointing Buffalo Sabres squad. And, even though his getting dealt offers him a fresh start with a new club, the 35-year-old is not suddenly going to turn the clock back a decade.

“It was really tough being 13 years in Colorado and then coming to a new team. I don’t think I really played my best hockey,” said Johnson, who signed a one-year contract with the Sabres in the offseason after spending the majority of his career with the Avalanche.

“My best years are behind me.”

The Flyers know that too, of course. Their acquisition of Johnson on Friday just before the NHL trade deadline, though, serves two purposes: It provides immediate help for what is both an inexperienced and banged-up blue line, and potentially enhances the team culture that both coach John Tortorella and general manager Danny Briere have labeled as the foundation of their rebuild.

His first game was one to forget, as the Flyers were run out of the building 7-0 by the Tampa Bay Lightning in a game that will primarily be remembered for Tortorella’s ejection midway through the first period and his refusal to leave the bench right away.

And the game was abnormal even before it started. The Flyers were forced to dress just five defensemen after Egor Zamula came down with an illness and Adam Ginning, reassigned to the AHL on Friday, was unable to make it back from the Philadelphia area in time due to weather-related flight delays, according to a team source.

In other words, it’s probably not all that advisable to form any broad conclusions from that game about how Johnson will or won’t contribute down the stretch. He was on the ice for Nick Paul’s power-play goal that made it 2-0 and maybe could have been harder around the net. He was also a bit flat-footed on Conor Sheary’s wrist shot from the high slot that made it 3-0, but Flyers goalie Samuel Ersson could have been better on both of those two scores, as well. He finished with a minus-1 rating in 19:57 of ice time, with two shots on goal and six hits.

And it’s not like anyone else on the Flyers was all that effective on Saturday either, as they got behind 4-0 midway through the first period.

“We’re usually a pretty decisive team,” assistant coach Brad Shaw, filling in for Tortorella, said after the game. “We’re usually setting the tone and playing a specific game and I thought we let them get to their game really quickly. …  Just never seemed to get our footing.”

The Flyers are fortunate in that they’ll have a chance to quickly put the brutal loss behind them when they host the league’s second-worst team, the San Jose Sharks, on Tuesday. One of the primary reasons they have managed to stay in the playoff race this season is because of their ability to quickly respond to poor efforts.

Still, they’re a bit of a different team now that they’ve lost Sean Walker, with his ability to help break the puck out of their own end and play that fast transition game that’s led to so much of the Flyers’ offense.

Johnson isn’t that type of player, and neither is another veteran who’s being relied on to play big minutes — Marc Staal, who skated in just 17 of the Flyers’ first 51 games and has now been thrust back into nightly duty with Jamie Drysdale, Rasmus Ristolainen and Nick Seeler still all on the shelf.

The Flyers seemed to realize they need to play differently in at least one of their two games after the Walker deal: They put forth an impressive, buttoned-up defensive performance in their 2-1 win in Florida on Thursday with rookies Ginning and Ronnie Attard making their respective season debuts on the blue line.

Part of the reason why they held the high-powered Panthers offense to just one goal was, according to Staal, everyone on the ice playing together as a five-man unit.

“Realizing the position we were in with some new guys coming in. I think our forwards — they always do a great job of being pretty aware defensively and playing as five,” Staal said. “We really focused on that before the game. … Just good structurally to get that one.”

Staal’s ice time has been steadily rising. He skated a season-high 19:10 on Saturday. And although he’s certainly not the fleetest of foot anymore at age 37, he has a positive expected goals percentage of 54.2 according to Natural Stat Trick, and at five-on-five has been on the ice for an even 12 goals for and 12 against.

Getting into a rhythm after being a frequent healthy scratch has helped.

“For sure. It’s definitely tough not playing when you’re used to being in the lineup every night your whole career so that was an adjustment,” he said. “Stayed positive and kept working and obviously getting an opportunity now and we’re playing really important games and it’s exciting for me to be back in and try to help this team win. … I’m starting to feel better on the ice, getting my legs and timing back more where I’m used to.”

When he signed a one-year deal in the offseason, the prevailing notion at the time was that Staal would be a prime candidate to get moved for, say, a mid-round draft pick ahead of the trade deadline. But Staal said on Saturday that it was always his intention to stay with the Flyers for the season, and now part of what has become a close group, he’s thrilled to be sticking around for the playoff chase.

“Been around these guys since September, I’ve definitely grown to enjoy this room and these guys and what we’re doing here,” Staal said. “Leaving really wasn’t a thought I had. You’ve just got to get in, you know? Get in the playoffs and see what happens. You never know.”

Staal knows that well as part of last season’s eighth-seeded Panthers who advanced to the Stanley Cup Final before losing to the Vegas Golden Knights.

The Flyers have to get there first, though. And in order to do that, both Johnson and Staal are going to have to play a role.

“You check your ego at the door, it’s about winning and it’s about building the culture and continuing to go on a big playoff push here,” Johnson said. “What I just told them was I’m here for whatever you need from me, here to be a good teammate, and do whatever I can for the guys.”

[bitchinbarzal]

https://www.tumblr.com/bitchinbarzal/741025422731575296/33-this-isnt-how-i-pictured-our-first

poor Ryder

Dylan and Mama D and Rasmus are looking at him like that 😡🤨😠

You just know Ryder called his mom and she came to buffalo.

She’s NOT happy with the cozens.

“It was an innocent mistake”

“She could’ve died!”

“Hardly!”

“I think you’ll find-“

“I think you will find I’m the doctor here!”

[masonmtxo]

HIYAAAAAA, SO EXCITED TO READ SOMETHING OF YOURS, YOU HAVE NO IDEA🥹🩷

Mason had been quiet all day, his loud laugh and terrible jokes had been noticeably absent as the evening drew in closer. OH SOMEONE IS SAD😭

All that had left his mouth had been soft ‘I love you’s and ‘I’m going to miss you’s, whispered into your ear so gently you nearly didn’t catch them. OH, SHE WON’T GO WITH HIMMMM,NOOOO

“C’mon Mase, you need to get packed,” you murmured when the lock screen of your phone showed the time was nearing 8pm, gently scratching his scalp as he laid on your chest, snuggled as close to you as he physically could be, legs tangled together as a film neither of you had been paying much attention to played in the background. OH POOR BABY BOY

“What’s got into you baby?” You soothed, “talk to me.” Sitting up slightly, forcing him to lift his head from the safety of your chest, you cupped your hand around his cheek, catching the gaze of his brown eyes. He shrugged, trying to duck away from you, but you held firm, “I don't want to go.” OH, Y/N, GO WITH HIM OR I’LL BE SAD TOO🤨

You frowned softly, sensing his anxieties about going to America tomorrow for pre season were more than just to do with the flight itself and something else was bothering him. Although he traveled often for matches, he never looked forward to flying, especially without you to keep him company, but after coming back from training earlier in the week to excitedly announce Rasmus had been assigned to sit next to him, he had seemed a lot more relaxed. OMG POOR BABY IS SCARED ABOUT FLYING WITHOUT HIS WOMAN BY HIS SIDE😭🤏🏻

“I wanted you to come,” his voice was almost a whisper when he finally spoke, red flushing over his cheeks letting you know he was embarrassed to admit that had been tormenting him all day. HE IS ACTING LIKE A LITTLE BABY ON FIRST DAY OF SCHOOL😂

“Come help?” His voice was soft, shrouded in sadness. Holding out a hand he carefully pulled you up, refusing to let go as he guided you upstairs to your room. HE IS A CUTIE PIE

Mason gave you a sweet kiss in thanks before mumbling he was going to brush his teeth and get ready for bed. His head was hung low making your heart break at the obvious sadness radiating off of him. OMG Y/N, HOW CAN YOU LEAVE HIM GO ALONEE, LOOK AT HIM

You sat from a moment, racking your brain for anything you could put in his case to make him smile once he arrived in LA. Mason always left a worn jumper or tshirt of his on the bed whenever he went away, knowing that it would make you smile when you found it before bed the first night he was away. It was something thoughtful that you very much appreciated, this time wanting to do the same for him hoping to give him comfort the way he always did for you. OHHHH, THIS IS SO CUTE, HE LEAVES HER SOMETHING OF HIS SO SHE CAN FEEL HIS PRESENCE🥹🥹

Opening up his case, keeping your eyes firmly on the bathroom door as you did so, you tucked Ted under Mason’s favorite hoodie, knowing it would be the first item he reached for upon arriving at the hotel in California. You zipped it back up and propped it up by the door ready for Mason to grab in the morning. OMGGG SHE PUT THE TEDDY BEAR IN HIS CASE, I’LL CRY

He was already in bed when you returned to the room, laying on his back staring blankly at the ceiling, eyes falling to you as he felt the bed dip beside him. You laid next to him, smiling knowingly as he shuffled towards you, carefully flopping his body on top of yours, head placed over your chest so he could hear your steady heartbeat. It wasn't often you cuddled like this, most of the time it was you being babied and loved on by Mason, but tonight he was the one in need of comfort and proximity to calm his anxieties. Hooking one leg around his, you pressed him as tightly into your body as you could, the weight of him on top of you brought you as much comfort as it did him. HE IS BEING SOOOOOO CLINGYYYY

“I rang the dog trainers earlier, they’re gonna drop Ace off tomorrow late morning,” he whispered into your skin, running the tip of his nose against your neck as he snuggled impossibly further into your body. OH, HE MADE SURE ACE WAS HOME TO TAKE CARE OF HER🤭🥹

When you awoke that morning the first thing you noticed was your proximity to the edge of the bed, opening your eyes to see the corner of your bedside table directly in front of your face having shifted onto your side in the night. Your boyfriend's body was still flush against you, looking over your shoulder to see the back of his head on your pillow beside you. You couldn't help but chuckle to yourself, sitting up carefully to look at the other side of your super king bed, Mason’s side untouched as even in his unconscious state he had opted to stay as close to you as he physically could be. THE FACT HIS SIDE OF THE BED IS UNTOUCHED CAUSE THEY SLEEP ATTACHED TO EACH OTHER

Mason didn’t wake until your alarm sounded, groaning as he instinctively pulled your arm further around his chest making you giggle, “Mase I need my hand to turn the alarm off.” THIS MAN IS SO CLINGY

“Morning,” his voice when he first woke up always had you melting into a puddle, the raspiness so sexy to you it made you shiver as you cuddled into his back, feather like kisses being pressed over his spine and shoulder blades, making sure to pay special attention to the smattering of moles and freckles dotted along his soft skin. I WOULD PAY BILLIONS TO HEAR HIS MORNING VOICE AND SEE HIM AS SOON AS HE WAKES UP💰💰💰💰

He hummed in response, his eyes slowly blinking open as you stood straight, making your way to the door to head down to the kitchen. GIRL…JUMP IN THE SHOWER WITH YOUR MAN, BREAKFAST ISN’T IMPORTANT

“Baby, wait,” you heard Mason speak through a yawn, turning back to see him shuffling himself out of bed, “come shower with me?” GOOD QUESTION MASON🤭

You undressed in silence, letting him lead you into the shower once he deemed it warm enough, instantly falling into his embrace under the cascading water. Showering with Mason never got old, it was something you both loved to do, the intimacy of holding each other's naked bodies and washing each other down in a comfortable silence. You took it in turns, both taking time to gently caress and massage each other as a guise for washing each other down, both desperate to be as close as possible in the little time you had left. THIS IS SO SOFT, I’LL MELT

“Mase,” you moaned lowly, hand coming up to grip on his forearm in an attempt to get his attention, “we don’t have time baby, I need to go make breakfast.” Mason grunted in response, his attack on your neck getting more heated by the second, “we’re skipping breakfast today,” his words were pointed, leaving no room for debate. HE HAS MORE IMPORTANT THINGS TO DO!

BEL???’ THIS SMUT? SO SOFT? SO ROMANTIC? SO SWEET? SO MORNING LOVE SESSION CODED? SO WOW?🥵🥵🥵🥵

Mason could read you like a book though and pulled away, placing his hands on your hips and gracing you with the first proper smile on his face in the past 24 hours, “now I’ve reminded you of what you’ll be missing, I think it may be time to get dressed.” SILLY BOY

You shook your head with a grin, happy to see that the dark cloud that had been surrounding him had started to lift. He was smiling, and that's all that mattered to you. OMG, YESSS PRETTY PRETTY, SMILEY BOY IS BACK

He appeared at the door as you were pulling up your panties, giving your bum a cheeky squeeze, “coffee is made and waiting for you at the front door angel.” SILLY NAUGHTY BOY

Hopping into the passenger side, you couldn't help but feel the tears prickle again, but you kept a brave face for Mason’s sake, “got your phone? Wallet? Headphones? Passport?” “Yes, yes, yes, anddddd,” he furrowed his brows, turning to grab his travel bag from the back seat and rifling through the front pocket, “yes!” SHE IS LIKE A MUM SENDING HIS BABIES ON A SCHOOL TRIP😂

“Text me when you're home, and when Ace arrives,” Mason requested, thumb slowly brushing over your cheek, “and promise me you will call me straight away if you need anything?” HE IS SO PRECIOUS

“Thank you sweetheart,” he pulled you against his body for a goodbye hug, leaning back to press a final deep peck to your lips, “don't crash my car and don't miss me too much.” “No promises to either,” you winked. Loving that despite your track record, he let you drive his beloved Defender whenever he was away. THEY ARE SO SILLY I LOVE IT

OMG THE TEXTS ABOUT THE TEDDY, SO CUTEEEEE😭😭

BELLLL

IM IN LOVE WITH THIS

POOR BOY IS SO SAD, BUT HIS GIRLY MADE SURE TO MAKE HIM FEEL BETTER🤭🤭🤭

THIS SMUT WAS TOP TIER, SO SOFT BUT HOT AT THE SAME TIME

I LOVE HOW THEY BOTH MADE SURE TO TAKE CARE OF WACH OTHER EVEN.WITH THE DISTANCE, HIM WITH ACE AND HER WITH THE TEDDY BEAR

THEY ARE JUST SO SWEET

WOW, YOU ARE SO AMAZING GIRLY, I FELT ALL HIS AND HERS SADNESS, POOR BABIES, BUT ALSO THE LOVE THEY SHARE🥹

AS ALWAYS THANK YOU FOR THSI WORK OF ART🩷🩷

Your feedback and excitement over fics always makes my day 🥹🫶🏻 thank you for this and im so glad you loved it 🩷🩷🩷