#poor kashi

[thecopynin-kakashi]

The hokage tower is buzzing with speculations about why the 6th hokage is in such a good mood. There's even a betting pool going!

"Are my good moods that rare that you lot feel the need to do this?"

[peachy-keen-sweetheart]

I moan into her shoulder, the trailing of her fingers down my body accompanied by the desperate grinding on my lap driving my wild with lust. I shrug off my shirt where it slips to the floor to join hers, and, more confident now, my fingers playfully slide up her waist to stroke at the covered underside of her breast.

Don't stop... you have no idea how badly I need you right now~

Her previous words serving as fuel to me, I hungrily leave open-mouthed kisses down her neck and shoulder, marking her as my own the whole way. I rolled my hips up into hers, hoping to elicit another sound of pleasure.

Tell me what you want us to do, dearest...

-- Kakashi

I want to laugh at the request not to stop, like I could even consider such an action right now. My spine arches, pressing my breasts further into his hands and whining in delicious pleasure at the litany of marks he leaves on my skin, knowing that they'll look so pretty when I look in the mirror.

Well... I did say I'd reward you, sweetie... how about we loosen these pants next? They look awfully tight...

Sliding back so my weight is mostly on his knees, I let my hand trail down his stomach until I reach his belt. Deft fingers working the buckle with haste, despite how nervous I might feel. He looks so damn handsome beneath me, watching how his body reacts to each touch of my fingers. I lick at my lips subconsciously...

[dark-elf-writes]

Guy: We’re rivals :D

Kakashi: sorry what?

Guy: D:

[delirious-donna]

nanami 🥹

Oh, Nanami gonna steal the win??

6-4 to the ex salary man whose lap we all want to sit on.

[plutosheaven]

just realized that at least three human corpses passed through Angie's stomach in the days before the Night Nurse got kicked in by Charles. i guess Kashi was just chilling with the digesting remains of those poor jumpers before she showed up??

[konjaku]

現の証拠|験の証拠[Gennoshōko] Geranium thunbergii

現[Gen] : Actuality

験[Gen] : Effectiveness

の[No] : Of

証拠[Shōko] : Proof, evidence

The name means "the real proof". It has long been used as a stomachic and is one of the three major folk medicines of Japan. Another name is 神輿草[Mikoshigusa]. 神輿[Mikoshi] means portable shrine.

The following is part of a comical story set in the Edo period written by Yamamoto Shūgorō. And this includes a passage written in the original usage of 現の証拠.

ここに到って、前紙屑買いは叫びだした。 「あっしゃあ云うでやす、人間は生きてるうちのこった、あの世を頼みに歯をくいしばっていたって、あの世にも決していいことはねえ、なにもかにも、生きてるうちのこってやす。悪辣な野郎とわかってる者を旦那とたてちゃあいけねえ、非道な御政治に眼をつぶっちゃあいけねえ、ただ正直なだけではだめだ、弱い者は強くなり、貧乏人でも女房子の仕合せは護らなくちゃあいけねえ、生きてるうちにそうしなくちゃあならねえでやす、生きてるうちにでがす」そして彼は額の瘤を撫でた、「現の証拠はこのとおり、ゆうれいになってもあっしのような男はこのとおりでやす、見ておくんなさい、このでけえ瘤を、もうたくさんでやす、ほほほほ、たくさんでやす」

Listen from 1:01:56 to 1:03:06 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YxYVzXaH7jg&t=3716s At this point, the paper scrap buying man before his death began to shout. "I'm going to tell you now. Human beings are everything while they are alive. Even if you live with suffering in this world with your hopes pinned on the next life, it will never be good even in the next life, either. Everything is only while you are alive. Don't keep a guy you know to be villainous in countenance as the master of a house. Don't tolerate outrageous politics. You can't just be honest. The weak must be strong and the poor must protect the happiness of their wives and children. You must do so while you are alive, while you are alive." And he patted the bump on his cheek. "The proof is, you see, this. A man like me is like this even as a ghost. Look at this big bump. I've had enough of this. Ha ha ha ha, I've had enough." From ゆうれい貸屋[Yūrei kashi-ya](The ghost rental store) Source: https://www.aozora.gr.jp/cards/001869/files/57766_72830.html

[tae-rambles]

OP ch 1117 SPOILERS

My thoughts as i read:

an interesting title?

the cover page is just too adorable (i wanna hug Nekomamushi like that it looks so comfy)

^ ... arent these 3 familiar...? (Krieg, Gin, Pearl)

a new adventure for the Saruyama Alliance! be careful not to get the bends again tho, Chopper isnt here to help you this time

wdym "its our turn to step up", Kujaku? what do you plan to do with all this new info? youre marines! youre working for those who want the info to stay secret! but youre also SWORD so you might figure something out idk

glad to see Drake is fine

what are you doing alone Smoker, what are you planning... (good to see you)

oh shit Nusjuro :o

why is Nusjuro getting all these cool but terrifying panels

^ YEET XD

Nusjuro has a Kitetsu! congrats to all who predicted it

damn they pushed each other away! good job Zoro :D

oh please dont separate please dont separate

oh stfu navy

Luffy's not in Gear 5 anymore but seams fine? did he eat another fermented shark?

damn theyre demolishing those battleships

f off granny

damn Doll but poor Kashi

oh no, Warcury's gone... dont tell me...

shit.

what a terrifying panel... dont you dare hurt Robonosuke!

oh dont tell me those bastards are gonna stop the message before Vegapunk finishes...

Bepo! :D im so happy to see you! where are you? wheres Law? i need to knoooow!

Warcury you fucker!

oh so thats what the title means... Oda you fucker!

well at least they destroyed some of their marine ships in the process... small victories...

fuuuuuuuuck im so angry

but i get it... the mystery of the D is one of the greatest mysteries in One Piece so of course it cant be revealed yet but c'mon! this is just too cruel 😭

anyways, great chapter as always :D

[queenhimarisama]

Be a Good Girl For Me

AO3 link if you prefer

Kakashi x f! reader

1,453 words

Summary: You'll be a good girl for Kakashi...won't you?

Tags/Warnings: Modern AU, Long-Distance Relationship, Phone Sex, Sexting, Dom/Sub Undertones, Orgasm Control

AN: Good morning friends. How are you? I am sleepy.

So, I was originally planning to participate in Kinktober. Then life happened, and I was only able to write one story for the event. I lamented about whether or not to go ahead and post it anyway, but I decided in the end to post it because all you Kakashi lovers deserve a nice treat.

Hopefully next year things will be less hectic. For now, enjoy. <3

Sundays were your favorite day of the week.

During the week, you had to slave away at your retail job, pretending you were passionate about selling junk to middle-aged women with bad haircuts. You were exhausted by the time you returned home, barely having the energy to text your boyfriend, Kakashi. You still did - you loved him, and you wanted him to know you were thinking of him. But it didn’t take long before you collapsed with exhaustion, letting him fill your dreams.

He was a successful businessman living a thousand miles away. You still had trouble believing how lucky you’d been the night you’d met, when he’d been in your city for a business trip and had bought you your favorite drink. He was like a dream - attentive and loving, but also having a powerful edge that made it obvious how he’d become so successful. The long distance made things harder, forcing you to imagine his hands on your body rather than experiencing it yourself. But it was worth it, especially on Sundays, when you both had the day off, and you both got to indulge in each other.

You already felt excited when you finally cracked your eyes open, immediately reaching for your phone.

[You] Morning, Kashi. ❤️

Only seconds later, the Read notification popped up. You settled back against your pillows, eagerly watching as he typed a response.

[Kakashi] Good morning, Princess. Did you sleep well?

He appeared so polite, so controlled. But you knew better. He was only waiting for a sign that your head was clear before he said what he really wanted.

[You] I slept ok. But I would have slept better if you were here.

You sent him a photo of you leaning your head against the empty side of the bed, pouting your lips. Your tank top shifted as you rubbed against the sheet, creeping dangerously down your chest and threatening to expose your breasts, and you hoped he liked what he saw.

It didn’t take long to find out.

[Kakashi] Poor little Princess. You look so lonely.

[Kakashi] And your bed looks so cold.

He sent you a picture in return of his bed, perfectly made except one side was turned down, exposing the navy-colored silken sheets beneath the cobalt comforter.

[Kakashi] You would be much more comfortable in my bed.

God, how you wanted to be in his bed. But that wouldn’t happen again for another two months or so, so for now, you had to play with the hand you were dealt.

You sat up, tugging your top off and fully exposing your breasts. You settled back against the pillows, arching your back to accentuate their curves, then snapped another photo.

[You] I would, but I guess this will have to do.

You couldn’t see his life reaction, but you could almost feel his heated gaze through the phone. It traveled through you, making you press your legs together as you waited for his response.

[Kakashi] That didn’t take you long, Princess.

[Kakashi] Eager this morning?

You giggled, your body warming as his more dominant side came out.

[You] I’m always eager when I’m thinking about your cock.

Another photo, this time of your hand wrapped around your breast, your fingers pinching your nipple between them.

A few seconds later, your phone chimed as Kakashi called you. You stared at the phone for a second before your thumb found the answer button. “Kashi?” you said, sounding breathless.

Kakashi’s low, rumbling laugh poured through the speaker. “You really are eager, Princess.”

Your face burned against the phone’s cool glass screen. “Of course I am,” you said. “I was dreaming about you last night.”

“Is that so?” Kakashi asked. “And what did I do in your dream?”

You blushed harder. “You made me suck your cock,” you said. “You held my hair and fucked my face until you came down my throat.”

There was silence on the other end of the phone, and for a brief moment, you wondered if you’d upset him. Then he drew a long, slow breath, the arousal heavy in his voice. “Would you like that?” he growled. “Would you like my cock in your mouth?”

“Mmhmm,” you whispered. Your hand slid down your body, teasing your clit as your pussy clenched at the thought. “Need you to fill me up.”

“Soon,” he said. “It won’t be long now. You’ll be a good girl for me next time I see you?”

“Of course,” you said. “I’ll always be good for you, Kashi.”

“Is that so?” he said, amused. “Then why are you touching yourself?”

Your hand froze, your fingers sticky with the evidence. “How did-?”

“I know you,” Kakashi replied. “Which is how I know you’re not being good right now.”

You swallowed hard, your face burning hotter. “I can’t help it,” you whined.

“Well, you’ll have to help it,” Kakashi said. “I didn’t give you permission to do so.”

You whined louder, reluctantly pulling your hand back. “I just have to be horny while you’re talking to me? I can’t do anything about it?”

“That about sums it up,” Kakashi said. “You know you’re not supposed to do anything without my say-so.”

You sighed, falling back against the mattress. “But, Kashi…”

He chuckled, the sound racing through your body. A fresh wave of arousal hit you, and you dug your nails into your sheets to stop you from returning your hand to your clit.

“You want it that badly?” he asked.

“Yes,” you said. “I need you.”

“Hmm,” he said. “I’ll make you a deal. If you can go…ten minutes without touching yourself, I’ll reward you. If you can’t make it, I’ll punish you.”

Your eyes widened, and you swallowed hard. “Okay, I can do that.”

“Can you now?” Kakashi asked. “It took you all of thirty seconds to break the rules last time.”

“I know, and I’m sorry,” you said. “I promise, I’ll be good.”

“Good,” Kakashi said, his voice darkening. “Because I want to be the one touching you.”

You let out a shuddering breath. “I want that too.”

“Hush,” Kakashi said. “Just listen.”

You clamped your lips shut, waiting.

“Good girl,” he said after a minute. “I hope you’re this good for me the next time I see you. Make sure you wear something you can afford to lose, because the moment I step through your door, I’m going to tear your clothes off. I’m going to push you onto the bed and spread your legs, and see for myself just how good you’ve been for me.”

You screwed your eyes shut, picturing Kakashi staring at your swollen pussy with his dark, intense eyes peering through strands of spiky white hair. You whimpered, then clamped your hand over your mouth.

He ignored your transgression and kept going. “I’m going to squeeze your tits with my own bare hands. I’m going to use my teeth on them, and anywhere else I find that makes you squirm. I’m going to throw your legs over my shoulders, and then, I’m going to taste that exquisite pussy of yours. I’m going to drink every drop you make until you’re screaming, begging me to let you cum.” His voice went even lower. “You’re mine, and only I can make you cum.”

You squeezed your thighs together, desperate to quell your arousal even as the filthy words kept flowing from his lips. But he was relentless, telling you how slowly he was going to lick your pussy, how he was going to tie you down and blindfold you so you could only feel what he was doing, how many times he was going to make you cum. You moaned with every vision he planted in your head, your toes curling as you fought the urge to touch yourself.

Ten minutes passed, and you could hear the smile in Kakashi’s voice as he said, “Well done, Princess. You made it.”

You giggled, feeling almost delirious with arousal. “May I have my reward now, Kashi?”

“You may,” he said. “Go open your front door.”

You stared at the phone, blinking. Then you scrambled to your feet, throwing your top back on before running to the door.

When you yanked it open, he was standing on the other side, his dark eyes even more intense than in your vision.

You dropped your phone. “Kashi?” you breathed. “How-?”

“Business trip,” he said casually. “Now then…do you remember what I told you would happen?”

You nodded, scarcely able to believe he was really here.

“Good.” He guided you back into your apartment, pushing the door shut. Then he grabbed your top and ripped the straps clean off. “Because you’ve been good, so it’s time for your reward.”

[forthesanityofstorytellers]

Make Me Write Tag

Ok ok ok ok ok

Was tagged by @bloodlessheirbyjacques @circa-specturgia AND @tryingtimi so

Real quickly tagging @squarebracket-trick @mjjune @winterandwords @agrimedena-drax @the-orangeauthor @magic-is-something-we-create No pressure! 😁

Rules: Make a 24hr poll listing the titles of every WIP or scene you want to work on. (It’s fine if you only have one, WIP, still make a poll for the vote count). Whichever WIP title or scene or project gets the most votes, write 1 sentence for every vote received.

(bending those rules too but not sure how so...stay tuned to whatever shinanigans I use this as an excuse to get up to 😂)

[ina-nis]

Various papers on loneliness and stigma, culture, etc...

(I’ll be going through a lot of papers, but I’ll try to break them up in several posts)

Most definitions of loneliness converge on the idea that it is an aversive feeling that emerges when one’s social relationships are unsatisfying, in quality or quantity (Perlman & Peplau, 1981). A social stigma, in turn, a complex set of culturally shared beliefs that lead to the derogation and devaluation of specific attributes and discredit the individual bearing them (...) As such, the social stigma associated with loneliness corresponds to a constellation of beliefs that derogate and devalue those who feel lonely, so as to encourage them to have appropriate standards for social connection and to fulfil those standards.

Past research in this area has shown that people who feel lonely are often described in negative terms (...) those who feel lonely are perceived to be socially inept, poorly adjusted, unlikeable and generally incompetent (...) past research in this area has typically confounded loneliness with poor social skills or behaviours (...) this is problematic because, though scholars used to believe that loneliness was the result of poor social skills and a preference for being alone (Jones et al., 1982), this is not supported by evidence. Indeed, people who report loneliness do not show a preference for being alone in their daily life (Queen et al., 2014), their social skills are at least as good as those of people who are not lonely (Gardner et al., 2005; Qualter et al., 2015), and they are sometimes even perceived as more friendly than non-lonely people (Christensen & Kashy, 1998; cf. Tsai & Reis, 2009).

(...) Although negative impressions of individuals reporting loneliness are key to understanding loneliness stigma, stigma can be expressed and understood in other ways too. A core distinction in the stigma literature is that between endorsed stigma (one’s own stigmatizing views of an identity or attribute) and perceived stigma (i.e. the belief that a particular identity or attribute is stigmatized in society; e.g. Pescosolido & Martin, 2015). Impressions of those who feel lonely fall under the category of endorsed stigma.

(...) Loneliness is strongly predicted by social determinants, such as changes in social networks due to life transitions (Buecker, Denissen et al., 2020), life circumstances (e.g. living alone, caring for a family member), socio-economic status, ethnic minority status, experiences with bullying or discrimination, disability, unemployment and living in a deprived area (Lasgaard et al., 2016; Matthews et al., 2019; Priest et al., 2017) – all of which are largely external and uncontrollable. As such, making largely internal or controllable attributions for loneliness neglects the range of structural, environmental and cultural factors that drive feelings of loneliness (Batsleer et al., 2018; Matthews et al., 2019), which is stigmatizing and hinders appropriate targeting of social interventions.

(...) it is important to examine indicators of perceived stigma (Pescosolido & Martin, 2015). Participants in a study carried out in the UK expressed fear that if they were to come forward to seek help for their feelings of loneliness, they would be simply told to ‘pull themselves together’ (Co-op Foundation and the British Red Cross, 2016). Another study, also in the UK, found that 81% of the young people surveyed cited fear of other people’s reactions as a barrier to speaking about loneliness (Co-op Foundation, 2019). These examples show that perceived community stigma contributes to norm enforcement by affecting the individual’s behaviour.

Finally, the derogation of those who feel loneliness and or perceived community stigma enforces normative expectations about sociality by engendering shame in those who feel lonely, as well as by encouraging them to conceal from others that they feel lonely. (x)

I have noticed in my own life that I do struggle with internalized stigma and also what I perceive from others. Of course, this alienates me more. Throughout years, I have heard all kinds of things and assumptions people had about me in my “alone” state: that I’m autistic (therefore, social interactions would be considered unnecessary or an annoyance), that I’m just shy and introverted (therefore, I don’t want to interact with others because they scare or bother me), that I’m intimidating (because of they way I present and express myself, my facial expression and eye contact, etc), that I’m a red flag (because I don’t have “real” friends, because if I’m alone it’s something I have brought upon myself, because I “treat others poorly”), and so on.

All that is to say that, I feel like, I’m somehow unapproachable (therefore, unwanted, disposable, etc) despite attempts at changing my demeanor and trying my hardest to “fit”. The moment I stopped, it’s as if society bared its fangs at me: “you’ll never belong here, stop trying.” I did and I’m paying the price.

(...) The common public view is that a lack of social interaction and social relationships cause loneliness (e.g., Hansen, 2018; Leahy, 2017). This implies that the cure for individuals or entire societies would be to get more socially connected (Hendrix, 2018; Whitley, 2017). Research, however, has uncovered a paradox: Individuals in cultures where people are less likely to be alone because of more and stricter social norms regulating social relationships (i.e., more restrictive norms) are often more likely to feel lonely than those in cultures where people are more likely to be alone because of less restrictive norms (e.g., Lykes & Kemmelmeier, 2014). A lack of social connection hence seems insufficient to account for differences in loneliness between societies with different cultures and can hardly explain the loneliness in cultures with more restrictive norms about social relationships.

This article therefore aims to provide a solution to what we refer to as the “cultural paradox of loneliness”—that is, to explain why loneliness tends to be higher in cultures with more restrictive norms about social relationships and where individuals are thus less likely to be alone or socially isolated. In the novel culture-loneliness framework, we propose that loneliness can thrive whether cultural norms about social relationships are lenient or restrictive, but for different predominant reasons.

(...) Loneliness is an important threat to human health and well-being. In different cross-sectional and longitudinal studies, feeling lonely was related to a higher risk of impaired mental health (including depression, anxiety, suicidal ideation, substance abuse, or social anxiety), impaired physical health (including obesity, higher blood pressure, sleeping problems, and weaker immunology; for an overview, see Cacioppo et al., 2015), unhealthier lifestyles (e.g., less physical activity; Hawkley et al., 2009), and even earlier mortality (Holt-Lunstad et al., 2015). These findings emphasize the importance of preventing chronic loneliness. Yet, escaping loneliness may be hampered by its social consequences: Lonely individuals do not only seem to interpret social situations more negatively (e.g., by paying more attention to negative social cues, or forming more negative memories of social interactions), they are also viewed more negatively by others (who perceive them as less sociable and less attractive; Cacioppo et al., 2014). It is therefore important to identify causes and consequences of loneliness to improve well-being.

Loneliness has been defined as perceived social isolation (Van der Weele et al., 2012) or the feeling of being cut-off or separated from others (Hays & DiMatteo, 1987). Loneliness is thus a subjective experience that may or may not arise from the objective state of being alone (i.e., solitude). Indeed, although loneliness should be influenced by how many actual relationships or social interactions an individual has (i.e., more or less physical isolation; e.g., De Jong Gierveld, 2009; von Soest et al., 2018), it also results if an individual does not have individually fulfilling, high-quality, or responsive relationships (i.e., emotional isolation; Erozkan, 2011; Givertz et al., 2013; Hawkley et al., 2008; Weiss, 1973). Furthermore, it can result if an individual’s own or cultural ideals about relationships remain unfulfilled (i.e., perceived isolation, resulting from perceived ideal-actual discrepancies regarding social relationships; Heu, van Zomeren, et al., 2019; Johnson & Mullins, 1987; Perlman & Peplau, 1981).

Most work on potential causes of loneliness has focused on individual and relational risk factors. These include, among others, being unmarried (Hansen & Slagsvold, 2015; Hawkley et al., 2008), living alone (Snell, 2017; Swader, 2019), genetic disposition (Matthews et al., 2016), introversion or neuroticism (Buecker et al., 2020), an insecure attachment style (Erozkan, 2011; Givertz et al., 2013), a small number or low quality of relationships (Hawkley et al., 2008; Shiovitz-Ezra & Leitsch, 2010), or few social interactions (e.g., De Jong Gierveld, 2009; von Soest et al., 2018). Although there is consensus that one can feel lonely whether one is alone or surrounded by others, most of these characteristics revolve around the extent to which individuals are or may become socially isolated. This is also reflected in models that propose that a key function of loneliness is to motivate socially isolated individuals to reconnect with others (Cacioppo et al., 2014).

This reasoning, however, does not consider that many people, for instance in collectivistic cultures, are hardly ever alone, yet also report to feel lonely: Despite large differences in how individuals relate to each other (e.g., Adams et al., 2012), loneliness seems to be a rather universal (van Staden & Coetzee, 2010) and qualitatively similar experience across different cultures (Heu et al., 2020). Indeed, loneliness in collectivistic cultures or cultures where individuals are more socially connected tends to be even higher than in individualistic cultures or, more generally, in cultures where individuals are less socially connected (e.g., Jylhä & Jokela, 1990; Lykes & Kemmelmeier, 2014; cf. Barreto et al., 2020). This highlights how little we know about loneliness in cultures with more restrictive norms about social relationships, and hence also about how to counteract it in culturally sensitive ways. Indeed, given that risk factors seem to differ, loneliness interventions from a culture with less restrictive norms about social relationships are likely to be ineffective in a culture with more restrictive norms. A better cross-cultural understanding of loneliness is therefore highly relevant to prevent and counteract the public health risk of loneliness in different cultures.

(...) Counter to the idea that tighter and more demanding cultural norms about social relationships (i.e., more restrictive norms) should increase social connection and hence decrease loneliness (e.g., Hendrix, 2018; Whitley, 2017), most research supports the notion that more restrictive norms increase the risk for loneliness. For instance, average levels of loneliness tend to be higher in more collectivistic countries or regions (Anderson, 1999; Fokkema et al., 2012; Imamoğlu et al., 1993; Jones et al., 1985; Lykes & Kemmelmeier, 2014; Sundström et al., 2009; Swader, 2019; Walker, 1993; Yang & Victor, 2011; cf. Barreto et al., 20202). This suggests that, at the cultural level, more restrictive norms have the potential to create higher risk for loneliness.

However, findings at the individual level partly deviate from culture-level findings—and even when individual and cultural levels are examined jointly (Jylhä & Jokela, 1990; Swader, 2019). Indeed, multiple studies suggest that more restrictive internalized or individually perceived norms may have the potential to protect from loneliness: Indicators of higher collectivism and higher relational stability (i.e., stronger cultural norms to hold on to established social relationships; Heu, Hansen, et al., 2019) were found to be related to lower loneliness at the individual level (Heu, Hansen, et al., 2019; Heu, van Zomeren, et al., 2019; Jylhä & Jokela, 1990; Triandis et al., 1988).3 Nevertheless, findings at the individual level are also more mixed than at the cultural level: Unlike most indicators of higher collectivism, perceived norms about how one should relate to others were not significantly related to, or related to higher loneliness at the individual level (Heu, van Zomeren, et al., 2019). Furthermore, more restrictive norms implied by lower relational mobility (i.e., norms that provide individuals with less opportunities to form new, and choose their relationships; based on Yuki & Schug, 2012) were related to higher loneliness (Heu, Hansen, et al., 2019). In sum, although it seems that more restrictive norms usually imply a higher risk for loneliness at the cultural level, more restrictive norms may also sometimes have the potential to protect from loneliness at the individual level. To account for these mixed findings and the cultural paradox of loneliness, we introduce the culture-loneliness framework.

(...) Our framework distinguishes three types of isolation as distinct risk factors for loneliness. Although present in all cultures, they should be more or less likely depending on the level of restrictiveness. First, more restrictive norms about social relationships should reduce the likelihood that individuals become physically isolated; that they lack social interaction and social relationships in general (De Jong Gierveld & Tesch-Römer, 2012; Georgas et al., 1997; Höllinger & Haller, 1990). Indeed, if cultural norms about social relationships become very lenient, individuals may choose convenience at the expense of their social relationships. For instance, those who can choose to do so may leave effortful or conflictual family relationships, live alone rather than deal with the habits of housemates, work from home rather than commute to a shared office, or use the faster self-checkout rather than the human cashier at the supermarket. In a study examining housing preferences in Japan, individuals, for example, indicated to prefer residential complexes exactly because they allowed for anonymity and the option to avoid neighbors (Kiefer, 1980). In sum, individuals may in such cases end up with fewer social relationships and interactions than is beneficial for them, making them feel lonely due to more physical isolation.

Second, more restrictive norms may increase the likelihood of emotional isolation. If individuals get restricted in their freedom to choose whom they relate to or how they relate to others, this should undermine that they can leave low-quality or harmful social relationships (e.g., conflictual family relationships; Heu, Hansen, et al., 2019) and that they can establish responsive relationships (i.e., emotionally rewarding relationships of mutual understanding; Reis & Gable, 2015). Despite a lower risk of too few social contacts, individuals in more (versus less) restrictive cultures may hence be at a higher risk for loneliness because of less opportunities to establish a network of individually satisfying relationships (e.g., Erozkan, 2011; Givertz et al., 2013; Hawkley et al., 2008; Weiss, 1973).

Third, more restrictive norms also imply a higher likelihood of perceived isolation—that is, of higher discrepancies between ideal and actual social relationships, which are important antecedents of loneliness (Johnson & Mullins, 1987; Perlman & Peplau, 1981). Indeed, more restrictive norms can reduce the number of culturally acceptable ways of relating to others (through more social norms about relationships), make ideals less attainable (through more demanding social norms), and increase the severity of deviation (through tighter norms). This, for one, increases the risk for loneliness through a higher likelihood of social sanctions for norm deviations (Cacioppo et al., 2014). Furthermore, individuals themselves may more often perceive their social relationships as insufficient or unsatisfactory due to internalized cultural norms. For instance, a strong cultural norm to have children implies that those who are childless will be more likely to perceive their relationships as deficient. They may hence feel lonelier than if they were living in a culture where many choose not to have children (Zoutewelle-Terovan & Liefbroer, 2017). Similarly, in cultures where the norm is that friends should provide emotional support whenever needed, more individuals may experience their friendships as unsatisfying than in cultures where friends should predominantly provide instrumental support (for cultural differences in friendship, see Adams et al., 2012). Again, this should increase the risk for loneliness through more perceived isolation.

(...) the culture-loneliness framework suggests that individuals need both agency (to seek relationships that are individually satisfying) and relatedness. A moderate amount of restrictiveness (i.e., a mix of some more restrictive and some less restrictive norms) may therefore be best to avoid loneliness. Indeed, moderate restrictiveness can foster both agency and relatedness by preventing that any type of isolation becomes excessive. This is in line with previous findings that both the more restrictive norms that encourage individuals to hold on to their existing social relationships (higher relational stability) and the less restrictive norms that provide opportunities to establish new social relationships (norms implied by higher relational mobility) relate to lower loneliness (Heu, Hansen, et al., 2019). Nevertheless, the finding that, at the cultural level, more lenient norms about social relationships were quite consistently related to lower loneliness (cf. Barreto et al., 2020) argues for fostering more lenient norms about social relationships in larger-scale policies.

The culture-loneliness framework can, additionally, provide the basis for culture-sensitive interventions against loneliness because it pinpoints which cultures should increase the likelihood of which risk factor. It suggests that interventions in less restrictive cultures should focus on preventing physical isolation—for instance, by fostering community structures, or by encouraging individuals to establish at least a minimal number of supportive relationships. By contrast, in more restrictive cultures, interventions should focus on reducing physical and emotional isolation—for instance, by creating safe spaces and establishing communities for those who deviate from relationship norms, by changing cultural norms to allow individuals to form individually rewarding relationships or by reducing social stigma for norm deviations. Which exact intervention is appropriate and effective may, however, depend on the characteristics and cultural norms of its target group. As such, any intervention needs to be preceded by careful research in the setting where it should eventually be applied. (x)

This read was enlightening, and it really illustrated the external impact (in this case, cultural) on a person’s sense of (dis)connection and loneliness. It hit home for me, and it does explain a lot of my feelings.

I came from a more restrictive culture, never felt “at home”, therefore I was considered a deviant, and that only worsened with factors such as queerness, career choices and relationships status, among other things - none of these were things that I purposely decided I wanted because I know the stigma attached to them, and I knew they would be tools of social exclusion and ostracism, in one way or another. The “relationship status” bit was actually a consequence of my “deviation”.

Not then, nor now have I suffered from physical isolation, but before, I was chained to strict norms, unable to leave a toxic and abusive environment, much like some of the examples in this paper. Now that I’m in a less restrictive place/culture, I have embraced the parts of my self that are considered “wrong” and it was great useful for self-improvement and self-worth.

Regarding emotional isolation, I wanted to say it’s hard to tell but... it really isn’t. Before when I was trapped in a shitty situation, I was in survival mode so I didn’t have the “luxury” of looking at my own feelings and needs. I probably suffered from it then like I do now, I just couldn’t address it. I still can’t address it now, but at least it’s out in the open.

I can see how in a more strict culture, it would be harder to feel lonely, because communities are built with very strong social foundations, the problem is when you deviate from these norms. So you can’t belong in there no matter what. Whereas in less strict cultures, it’s “every man for himself”. You have freedom to be who you are, you can find community everywhere, but (from what I could gather) the foundations are not as strong, and they crumble just as easily.

[inexcolle]

Song of the Losers by TOBi ft. Rouon Aro, Toune Kashi, and Shellingford

かわいそーズのうた｜鑠琵｜狼音アロ＆糖音カシ＆シェリングフォード

Why do you call us losers? Such a depressing name doesn't suit us at all

If we try, we can do it, too We'll show you our power Just watch!

A voice somewhere is calling out to us We have to go and save them, because we're superheroes!

We'll come running anywhere! We've got no time to worry! We're by your side! It's all good! Don't cry!

Even the painful things are a piece of cake! Just forget about all your worries! Move forward together with us! Through this wonderful life!

The title refers to 「かわいそーず」which is a morphed version of 「カワイソス」, a Japanese slang term that is usually used to say "poor thing" in a half-joking/lighter manner. English lacks a clear equivalent, so I opted for "loser," which is used in some similar ways.

This song contains the phrase へのへのカッパ which seems to only be related to a manga that I don't recognize. It may be an extension of the phrase へのカッパ which means something similar to "easy peasy," so I opted for that. If I somehow get clarity on this, I'll update it.

[peachy-keen-sweetheart]

I wouldn't want you touching yourself, sweetheart. The thought of you waiting impatiently on my bed, unable to pleasure yourself until I arrive... mm, that turns me on.

Despite my suggestive words, her blush is cute and I can't help an endeared smile. I long to reach up and tuck those fallen strands of hair behind her ear, to better see those glittering eyes so full of love and desire.

Well, after I disable your ability to walk it would only be fair for me to carry you around, wouldn't it?

I chuckle, growing into a louder giggle and then a hearty laugh as her fingers tickle up my sides. I squirm underneath her, rolling onto my back as I try half-heartedly to push her hands away with laughter-weakened limbs.

Please. Please! S-stop it!

-- Kakashi

Feeling triumphant at discovering a hidden weakness, I squeak when he rolls over and dislodges me from my seat. Scrabbling back to tickle him a little more whilst I have him at my mercy.

Ah ha! Kakashi is ticklish, what a delightful piece of information. Poor baby, does he want me to stop?

The baby talk is funny and I’m trying so very hard not laugh out loud as he wriggles around and bats at my hands. It’s really adorable to see his side of him but I do stop when his chest begins to heave from the exertion of laughing and trying rather weakly to fight me off.

I remember you telling me I’d stand no chance in a fight with you, seems you might have underestimated me.

Laying over his chest, my cheek over his heart and head tilted to watch him roll his eyes and fight the smile tugging on his lips.

And to circle back to that earlier comment, kashi… you get turned on by the thought of me being all frustrated and pent up until you come home? You know I’d jump you the minute you walked through the door, or at least I’d try.

[surendrakumar1]

🔹Meeting with the God-realized saints

Sant Garibdas Ji met God Kabir Sahib in the form of a living Mahatma and showed him his Satlok and left him back on Earth. Then Sant Garibdas Ji told:

It is not even the weight of the infinite universe.

Satguru Purush Kabir is the creator of the clan.

Poor man, we are the Sultani Nanak stars, gave advice to Dadu.

The weaver caste could not differentiate, Kabir was born in Kashi.

[delirious-donna]

not sure if this is classified as a thirst (??) but imagining drunk or tipsy Kakashi who comes home from a night out with Guy and Yamato to see you sitting on the couch reading one of his precious books in one of his shirts that you kind of drown in. In that moment he’s so filled with love for you that he doesn’t know what to do with himself. He settles on just kicking his shoes off, sliding his jacket off, and throws himself on top of you🥺he gets really touchy and handsy and all you can do is giggle and lecture him about going to drink some water before you help him get ready for bed. And while you’re walking down the hallway with him in tow, he’s just grumbling about how he just wants to touch you and love on you and give you the best night then not even a second later he’s murmuring about his love for you and your future. Then he just passed out as soon as his head hits the pillow. But, I know damn well that he’s a sucker for some good old sweet morning sex🤭- I’m so soft for him right now!!!! —🐻

This is hands down adorable. 🥺

So adorable that I gotta write something for this but I’ll post it separately and link it back to this ask.

Poor drunk Kakashi being all soft and gooey when he gets home, ugh my heart!! I can almost hear him in my head…

“Kashi, you’ve got to drink your water. You’ll regret it in the morning if you don’t.”

“I’m not d-drunk. I feel amazing and I wanna hold youuuu. Stop running away!”

Alright, leave this with me and I’ll put something together when I can! 🥰

[twentythreemillionstories]

Wednesday 10th July 2024, Kashi, 3.36am.

#176,975 — A poor girl is much abused by her evil step- mother and step-sisters. But strangers are not welcome there.

[bskuchnhibhai]

Once Sheikh Takhi spread wide a fake letter of Lord Kabir Saheb Ji,who was doing Leela of a poor weaver at Kashi during that time, arranging a 3 day feast for all.

More than 18 lakh people arrived.

Lord Kabir arranged marvelous and delicious feast for all .

🙏🏻🌸Kabir Saheb Ji is Supreme God 🌸🙏🏻

🖥Watch sadhna TV @7:30pm 🖥

#KabirParmatma_PrakatDiwas

#SantRampalJiMaharaj